Minion Death Cult - So you want to take the based out of based dirt? (preview)
Aired: 2023-09-21
Duration: 04:42


=== Conservative Humor Gone Awry (04:26) ===

[00:00:01]  The liberals are destroying California and conservative humor gone awry.
[00:00:07]  Conservative humor gone awry is going to fascist-fornia today.
[00:00:11]  So stay tuned.
[00:00:12]  We're going to take a few pictures of the desert and how their policies are actually messing it up.
[00:00:18]  It's not beautiful when you go across that border.
[00:00:20]  Stay tuned guys, we'll show you exactly what it looks like when you're at in the local, western deserts, all there in Barton, Houston.
[00:00:32]  Stay tuned.
[00:00:33]  Alright, I'm Alexander Edward.
[00:00:36]  And I'm Tony Boswell.
[00:00:37]  And we're Minion Death Cult.
[00:00:39]  The world is ending.
[00:00:41]  An undercover Democrat doing sabotage through public sex acts is responsible.
[00:00:49]  And we're documenting it.
[00:00:50]  I knew those were the moves of a Democrat.
[00:00:53]  Wow.
[00:00:54]  I just want to issue an apology to Lauren Boebert.
[00:00:57]  I made some comments that kind of made light of you on our previous episode, you know, referencing you having your your orbs pondered in the movie theater.
[00:01:11]  Turns out Lauren Boebert was set up.
[00:01:14]  Yeah.
[00:01:15]  Yeah.
[00:01:15]  I mean, that makes sense.
[00:01:16]  That makes sense.
[00:01:17]  You know, you know how convincing and charming and Devon air those Democrats can be.
[00:01:23]  Absolutely.
[00:01:24]  That's why they're in bed with Hollywood is so that they can trick naive and salt of the earth conservatives.
[00:01:30]  That makes so much sense.
[00:01:33]  I have here a tweet from Liz Crokin who cracked this case.
[00:01:38]  It turns out Lauren Boebert's mystery man is a Democrat bar owner.
[00:01:43]  See, I didn't know this.
[00:01:44]  Did you know this?
[00:01:46]  Do they?
[00:01:46]  I mean, no, I had no idea.
[00:01:47]  Is it?
[00:01:49]  It's probably one of those bars.
[00:01:50]  Does it have like a rainbow in the window?
[00:01:52]  Is that how they announced the Democrat?
[00:01:54]  I read somewhere there was a non-homophobic bar.
[00:01:59]  I read somewhere that the bar was not being homophobic, so... If you're dating a bar owner, folks, you gotta go in and look at that tap list.
[00:02:07]  You gotta check the fridge.
[00:02:08]  You gotta make sure there's no fucking trans beers in there.
[00:02:12]  I don't know how many times to tell you.
[00:02:13]  This is what happens.
[00:02:14]  You get fingered at Beetlejuice, and then they try to cancel you.
[00:02:19]  Yeah, and you could have avoided that if you went and looked and realized that he does, in fact, carry Black Girl Magic Rosé.
[00:02:28]  This is a real theory.
[00:02:29]  This is a genuine theory.
[00:02:31]  I mean, it's a crank theory, but it's a good one.
[00:02:33]  I believe it.
[00:02:35]  I want to believe it.
[00:02:36]  I mean, it gives me faith in the Democratic Party, actually.
[00:02:41]  This is the type of real politic that they, uh, they normally are too afraid to engage in.
[00:02:47]  Um, okay.
[00:02:48]  Liz Crokan continues.
[00:02:50]  She's coming off of a divorce and she's vulnerable.
[00:02:53]  This guy comes into her life, charms her, seduces her, and then probably gets her liquored up and takes her out in public.
[00:03:00]  Stage set.
[00:03:01]  Wow.
[00:03:01]  So he not only, wow, he, he, he's a sex pest.
[00:03:05]  He's a date.
[00:03:06]  He did date rape to her.
[00:03:08]  That's really fucked up.
[00:03:09]  I mean like, what if she didn't even know she was going to Beetlejuice?
[00:03:14]  I care now about date rape!
[00:03:17]  Yeah, now I care.
[00:03:19]  It's one of the biggest problems facing us today.
[00:03:22]  She didn't consent to theater.
[00:03:24]  Democrat men are scum.
[00:03:27]  Democrat men are trash.
[00:03:31]  I love to read stories about fictional characters like wizards and good Democrat men.
[00:03:38]  He then instigated.
[00:03:44]  He then instigates her by fondling her in a theater that just happened.
[00:03:49]  He groomed her!
[00:03:50]  He groomed her into jerking him off, Tony!
[00:03:53]  That's messed up.
[00:03:54]  She didn't even know she wanted, she didn't even know she wanted to do that.
[00:03:56]  She didn't want to do that.
[00:03:58]  She was hypnotized by the boob grabbing.
[00:04:01]  You know, and it's, it's like, yes, she's an adult woman.
[00:04:04]  Yes, she's 55 years old.
[00:04:08]  But she's from a part of the world where you could try you used to be able to trust people.
[00:04:11]  Yes, Colorado.

=== Bonus Episodes Every Saturday (00:29) ===

[00:04:12]  I'm talking about Colorado.
[00:04:14]  Back back when when people's word meant something.
[00:04:18]  And so, yeah, she's going to get taken advantage of and in some cases groomed.
[00:04:21]  It's messed up.
[00:04:23]  It's messed up.
[00:04:24]  Back in my day, you should be able to just get your boobs grabbed.
[00:04:26]  And that's all you had to worry about.
[00:04:27]  You weren't going to be drinking someone off in, you know, in the theater the next minute.
[00:04:30]  But the way these Democrats work now, you just never know.
[00:04:34]  Help us do this show for only five bucks a month and you'll get two bonus episodes every week, including a live stream with listeners every Saturday.