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Aug. 29, 2022 - Minion Death Cult

01:28:09

I cannot believe I gave two legs for my tuition. What a dope I am. Ooh-rah!

This week Joe Biden cancels $10k of student debt, enraging people who received debt forgiveness for legitimate reasons (owing a business). Also, it's V-Day on Facebook as a Missouri school district reinstates the art of spanking students, and minions come out of the woodwork to show us just how normal spanking made them. Support the show at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult for only $3.11/month and get a bonus episode every week, as well as instant access to hundreds of previous bonus episodes, directly in your podcast app or browser. Music: Elder - The Falling Veil Bulldoze - Hypocrite Broadcast - Still Feels Like Tears

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	The liberals are destroying California, and conservative humor gone awry... conservative humor gone awry is going to fascistphonia today.
	So stay tuned.
	We're going to take a few pictures of the desert and how their policies are actually messing it up.
	It's not beautiful when you go across that border.
	Stay tuned, guys.
	We'll show you exactly what it looks like when people start the desert.
	All their environmental stuff.
	Stay tuned.
	All right, I'm Alexander Edward.
	We're...
	And I'm Tony Boswell.
	And we're Minion Death Cult.
	The world is ending.
	Student loans are responsible.
	We're documenting it.
	I mean, it's the cancellation of the student loan.
	The student, the for-profit education system and predatory lending of the student loans.
	That was good.
	It's the cancellation.
	No, that's good stuff.
	It's just unthinkable.
	It used to be unthinkable.
	But before we get into that, before we get into today's episode, hello everybody, it's MinionDeathCult.
	Thank you for tuning in.
	I wanted to tell Tony and I wanted to tell everybody a very embarrassing story.
	Yes, awesome.
	Because I feel like if I don't put it out there into the world, I'm going to let myself forget that it happened.
	and because it's like more it's more peaceful that way but I feel like I won't learn anything from it if I allow myself Yeah, you're doomed to do it again.
	We don't want that.
	You want us to hold you accountable is what you're saying.
	I don't know if there's a way.
	I think I was already held accountable.
	I just want to, that accountability, I want to crystallize it into my mind.
	Cool, that makes sense.
	I respect that.
	So on Wednesday I went to this show by myself.
	Ani had to work late and I don't really think she cares about this band anyway.
	I went to see Elder who's like a sort of sludgy stoner rock Kind of Doom band.
	They're actually a lot heavier live than they are on record.
	I recommend them.
	If you like any of that stuff, you probably already know who they are or whatever, but very good live.
	Didn't expect the guy to be such a shredder, but he was.
	But anyway, so I go to see him and I'm looking at the lineup, you know, ahead of time, a couple of days before, and there's this band that's opening called Dreadnought.
	And I'm like, oh, You know, these guys are weird.
	They're like, you know, it's two women, two guys.
	They're playing like, kind of like Doom, but it's, uh, it's got jazzy elements to it.
	It's got keyboards in every song.
	It's kind of weird.
	I kind of like it.
	I kind of want to see this band and for, you know, I don't want to, didn't want to necessarily get there super early, but I did want to see the opening band.
	So I, uh, I decided to get there when doors opened at seven.
	Okay, so Dreadnought.
	Dreadnought, real quick.
	I was thinking this is like a dreadlock joke, but I looked it up and it's a boat, apparently?
	Yeah, it's a type of warship.
	Okay, okay, cool, cool, cool.
	So I wasn't sure, because we're talking stoner stuff, I wasn't sure what direction we were going with this.
	But Dreadnought, it's a type of warship.
	Okay, they're opening up for a sick-ass band that we like.
	Okay, now we're on, now I got more of a picture on.
	You thought it was like D, like Dread, K-N-O-T.
	Yeah.
	Like a knot in someone's dreads.
	Yeah, exactly, which we all know is just the worst.
	That would be a good band.
	That would be like the name of a Sublime cover band or something.
	I was gonna be more generous and say, like, Soulfly.
	Like a Soulfly cover band.
	Oh, shit.
	That is very generous.
	Um... So, I get there at 7.
	I get there at 7, and I talked to somebody before, somebody in Seattle, I had never been to this venue, and I talked to somebody before, and they were like, oh, the substation, it's like a super small venue, you should, like, buy your tickets ahead of time, and I was like, oh, okay, I should, I didn't know that.
	So I bought my tickets online at Will Call.
	I get there, Get my tickets, doors open at 7, I got there at like 7.15.
	Go inside, uh, there's a, you know, it's a small-ass room, it's like the size of, uh, it's like smaller than the Echo, kind of.
	That's pretty small.
	Yeah, and there's a bar on one side, and then merch tables on the other side, and the line for the bar is already, like, stretching across the room.
	There's other people milling about the line for the merch is already stretching across the room on like the y-axis, you know, and so I'm like, okay, I'll chill out.
	I'll wait here until the lines go down and then I'll buy, you know, some soda water and merch and you know, I'm looking at the stage and the stage is small.
	The curtains are pulled.
	I'm like, okay.
	And I'm waiting, and I'm waiting, and I'm waiting, and I finally get in line to get some soda water.
	And it's like almost 8 at this time, so I'm like, okay, the show's probably about to start soon.
	And nothing happens.
	And then at 8, they start cranking the house music louder, and they actually put on Mastodon's Leviathan, and I was like, okay, well, at least it's like a good album that I can listen to while I'm waiting for these bands to start.
	And like the lines for the bar never go down.
	The lines for the merch never go down.
	And I'm just kind of like standing there facing the stage, waiting for something to happen.
	And then at like nine, I've been there for two hours and I'm texting Tony.
	I'm like, what the fuck is happening at this show?
	This is like, this is so stupid.
	I got here so early for nothing.
	Cause now the show, like maybe there aren't enough people here, so they don't want to start or something.
	Maybe there's technical difficulties.
	And so I've already talked to, like, a ton of people here.
	I've already, like, chatted up people who are next to me.
	I've chatted up the band.
	I talked to Dreadnought at their merch table.
	I was like, oh yeah, I'm excited to see you guys.
	And I talked to the guys at the Elder table, and I was like, you know, which album is this, yada yada.
	So around nine, I go up to the guys at the Elder table, and I'm like, when are the bands gonna start?
	And he's all, oh, Elder?
	And I was like, no, the first band, when is it gonna start?
	He's all, oh, they already played.
	What?
	And I was like, now, I smoked a little joint, I smoked a little CBG mom grass joint on the way to the show, so I'm like, did I get so high that I somehow didn't notice a band playing?
	Like what?
	I was so confused.
	No, you're supposed to especially notice a band playing when you're high.
	You like, you actually think the live music is the live, the music over the speakers is a live band.
	That's what's supposed to happen here.
	I, so they already played and you got there like seven.
	This is so early.
	Yeah.
	I was like, did they play before I got there?
	What happened?
	And so I walk out and I'm like, I'm like trying to get my head straight because I'm like, I can't fathom what is happening.
	I'm very confused.
	I hate this for you.
	I walk out of the room and then I hear other music playing.
	Oh no.
	And there is a much larger room with a stage and the second band is already halfway through their set.
	No way.
	No way!
	So, not only do I have, like... Oh, I missed this band that I showed up two hours early to see.
	Also, I was standing around in, like, the chilling zone for two hours, facing an empty stage with, like, a cup of water in my hand.
	It is the most embarrassed I've ever been for, like, the last probably 15 years.
	Genuinely.
	That, oh, I feel that for you so bad.
	And then like the Dreadnought merch people are like, Doug, what do you mean?
	We watched you sit here.
	We watched you stand right over there drinking your fucking water instead of seeing our band.
	Like, what are you talking about?
	And that's the thing.
	It's like, I thought I kept an eye on them.
	I thought I, I thought I kept an eye on them to see like when they were going to go up and I never saw them leave.
	And then I saw the two women join behind the merch table and I was like, okay, are they getting ready?
	No, they had just played, apparently.
	Wow.
	Wow.
	That's so brutal.
	Oh, I feel that for you so hard, just in the wrong room.
	So embarrassing.
	Yeah.
	Oh, wow.
	That's awful.
	I mean, I might have suspected something if somebody hadn't told me how, quote, small the substation was.
	Mm-hmm.
	Because I was like, oh, wow, this is really small.
	Dude, the actual stage is like as big as the Echoplex, almost.
	So it's not even that small.
	It's like, it's like way bigger than, than Chain or Showcase or any of that.
	That is one of those things.
	It kind of depends on who you, but I'm assuming that whoever you talk to is someone who you would just kind of go with because when you do talk to people, they don't realize that a small venue is like very small.
	I was thinking like, Oh, Oh, okay.
	So this is like the smell.
	This is what we're working with.
	We're working with an alley and a stage.
	Okay, cool.
	Yeah.
	I didn't know how big Elder was.
	I didn't know Elder would, like, sell, you know, hundreds and hundreds of tickets to this night.
	They're in the big room, you know?
	Yeah.
	So, anyway, I had to come clean.
	I've been going to shows for a long time.
	This is, like, one of the biggest faux pas I've ever made, except for kicking connected guys in the back on purpose.
	This is, like, the... Yeah.
	Probably the second biggest mistake I've ever made in my showgoing career.
	I will say, what you did do though, is you went to the show alone.
	Which is, I think people need to do that more often.
	I go to shows alone a lot by myself.
	And of course, you're alone by myself.
	But the thing is, because you wanted to be held accountable for this, you told us.
	But the thing is, no one had to know about this.
	And I've done some really embarrassing things at shows that I'm at by myself, that no one has to know about.
	So yeah, go to a show by yourself.
	Act a fool.
	Maybe miss the whole show in the little bar next door to where the show actually is.
	In the same building, though.
	Fuck.
	So, and I was like, they cranked Mastodon, and so that like placated me while I was waiting.
	It was like, it was the illusion, you know?
	It was a false sense of security that they lured me into.
	And then after Mastodon, they played Big Business, and I was like, okay, at least they got good music going.
	Yeah, you like text me, you're like, dude, they're playing Big Business.
	I'm like, oh, that's cool, they're doing good.
	At least they're keeping you occupied, because I was kind of dying for you.
	And I was like, dang, like, I wonder if they, are they ever going to start for him?
	Like, what's going on?
	Um, and then you're like, yeah, I'm playing big business.
	I'm like, cool.
	That's at least you got that.
	But they're playing big business loud because there was no music going on in the second room.
	I'm sure.
	Um, I, wow.
	And I didn't have the heart to like touch base with you after that happened.
	I was like, uh, I respect it.
	I can't talk about this right now.
	I'm happy that you brought it here in front of everybody.
	That's good.
	Well, it is important to go to shows, but you gotta be careful not to join or help establish a community there.
	You gotta go to shows and just remain by yourself so that when you do something embarrassing, nobody, like, knows who you are.
	So, you know, it doesn't get around.
	If you start to establish ties within a scene or something like that, well, I mean, that's, like, the first step towards just embarrassing yourself later on.
	That's true.
	That's step one because then they are taking notes.
	They might not be saying hi, but they are taking notes.
	Yeah.
	This guy fucking loves water.
	When do you pay for a ticket?
	Dude, imagine, imagine like, yeah, you go, you go in, you've just seen, uh, you've just seen Dreadnought and you go back into the bar and I'm still standing there, like tapping my foot to big business staring at an empty stage.
	That's so awesome.
	And also a good thing that you're not drinking right now, because I'm sure you would have just been tossed by the time you figured it out, and it would have been a bummer.
	That's like, I feel like fucking...
	What's his name?
	I feel like American Psycho.
	Like just, oh, this is good music.
	I'm out here enjoying music, huh?
	This is the whole experience.
	Wow.
	It's great.
	I love it.
	Drinking ice cold water and listening to pre-recorded music and standing there.
	Patrick Bateman.
	When dreadnoughts next door ripping.
	I was going to say Jason Bateman, but it's Patrick Bateman.
	I forget which one, oh never mind, I remember now.
	It's okay, we don't need to get into Jason Bateman.
	- Yeah, Jason Bateman is the actual avatar for masculinity, unlike Patrick Bateman.
	Okay.
	So people are probably aware that Brandon, Brandon finally pulled out the big guns and canceled $10,000 of student debt.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	So did Joe Biden.
	So did Joe Biden.
	Apparently Brandon and Joe Biden both did this.
	What do you mean?
	I don't know.
	I feel like people say Brandon too much and the history books are going to literally forget that there was not a Brandon.
	There was a guy named Joe Biden.
	I know what I mean.
	Who cares?
	Who cares who gets the credit?
	- People know what I mean.
	I mean, you know, who cares?
	Who cares who gets the credit?
	You know, that's the kind of guy that Brandon is.
	See, that's true.
	That's true.
	Yeah, he cancelled $10,000 of student debt and, like, the worst people in the world had a meltdown online.
	Had a fit.
	We have wonderful examples of said meltdown.
	The most fascinating part of it, I think, was people with hundreds of thousands of dollars in PPP loan forgiveness coming out against forgiving $10,000 of student loans.
	Yeah, yeah.
	I do like, like I said, people were trying to dunk on people with their, you know, oh yeah, well look what you got done.
	You got hundreds of thousands of dollars.
	But like, that's not the own we think it is, because those people are like, they don't care about being hypocrites.
	And they're also like, yeah, but I'm like a business owner.
	You're like, not even graduated from college when you do this mistake.
	Mine's for the economy.
	Yours is like, to go get a liberal arts degree.
	And like, they don't care about this dunk.
	And, like, all we're pointing out is that they finessed the government real hard.
	And, like, I really wish that we would have got, like, a PPP loan and just, you know, to cover all of our bases and, like, gotten that forgiven.
	That would have been sick.
	Like, I'm just, like, you guys are just showing how they finessed the government.
	And, like, that's cool for them.
	Yeah, I don't think Marjorie Taylor Greene is going to learn a lesson from the White House quote tweeting her.
	I just think it's funny.
	I think it's funny and it shows to other people.
	It shows to other people what the ruling class in this country gets away with.
	And yeah, they get away with shit like this because of the White House that we have.
	Because of the Congress that we have.
	But I think a lot of people didn't know about the PPP loans in general.
	And then a lot of people don't know that they were completely forgiven by the government.
	We tried to tell them.
	It was a conversation point a lot.
	We tried to let everyone know that.
	I was mad because the guy who fired me got a PPP loan forgiven.
	We tried to tell people this and they didn't listen.
	Like the liberals didn't listen.
	This should be old news, but yeah.
	We got to use it as a dunk now to point out people being hypocrites, so now more people do know about it for sure.
	Yeah, the White House did a tweet thread where they quote tweeted, every Republican complaining about this.
	Like, just everybody who complained about this got hundreds and thousands of dollars forgiven by the federal government.
	Yeah.
	Marjorie Taylor Greene had $183,000 in PPP loans forgiven.
	Probably half of that went to her personal trainer.
	This guy, Vern Buchanan, a congressman, got 2.3 million in PPP loans forgiven?
	Incredible.
	Who was, yeah, he was complaining about, as a blue-collar kid who worked his way through college, I know firsthand the sacrifices people make to receive an education.
	Biden's reckless unilateral student loan giveaway is unfair to the 87% of Americans without student loan debt and those who played by the rules.
	Yeah, 2.3 million dollars straight into his pocket from the federal government.
	And it sucks because it's really the White House is over here saying like, oh, look what we did because the White House did that.
	It was what they're saying.
	Like the US government did that, but they don't think they don't have to take responsibility for it because it was a different president.
	But it's still the same system that forgave these loans.
	Well, and it's just like liberal.
	I think you're posting L's.
	I mean, kind of.
	The W is just canceling student debt.
	That's the W. This isn't the W. This is like the victory lap.
	This is the schadenfreude of other people's misery.
	That's what this is.
	This is just playing online.
	But it should be like, oh, lookit, we did $10,000, but we could have done $2.1 million.
	Yeah, right.
	That's what I hate about it.
	That's like the L I think they're posting, but it's okay though because we get to show those nasty conservatives that they're hypocrites one more time and so we get to feel real big about it.
	I just it's it's just funny to see this like blue collar working class rhetoric from uh yeah the wealthiest people in the world who have duped a lot of people into thinking that they're the party of the working class it's funny how yeah republicans have tried to Model themselves or brand themselves rather as the party of the working class, like true Americans, not like liberal elites like Starbucks baristas or gender studies majors.
	You know, these people that are making like $20,000 a year.
	We're the party of the working class, etc.
	And I feel like Democrats have like let them have that one.
	Like Democratic leadership have let them have that one because there's no danger of Republicans actually enacting a working class agenda.
	Like they can afford to be the quote party of the working class because they're never going to do anything about it.
	Like they're not.
	First of all, they're not because it's... They're just slightly more full of shit than the Dems are when it comes to that.
	Yeah, because the Democrats say they're for stuff that would help the working class and somehow it just never actually passes.
	Somehow they never actually get it done.
	So weird.
	But yeah, it's just you can afford to have the Republicans play this role because there's no danger of that.
	You know, it's the same thing of like Republicans talking about oil prices or Republicans talking about the prices of food and goods and services and inflation.
	It's like, well, yeah, you can afford to complain about the price of oil Because you know the Democrats are never going to actually do anything that would lower the price of oil or that would, like, fix the price of goods and services.
	Because that's not what either party wants to do.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I just... I don't... I mean, the hypocrisy part of it isn't, like, the big... the big... biggest deal.
	I don't know.
	I just... I... Yeah.
	It's, like, astounding For you to just go on, go in public and say, nobody should be given loan forgiveness.
	And then it's like, oh, is this you?
	And it's $2.3 million in loan forgiveness.
	Like, nevermind about the hypocrisy or any of that.
	It's just the facts on the table that you're like, as unaware as possible to say something like that.
	And then you've taken advantage of the system far more than any of us would ever be able to take advantage of the system.
	Yeah, but like they get to, like I said, but they don't care about that because they get to kind of justify it.
	I don't care about persuading, persuading a Republican politician about it.
	I'm just talking about like the facts of it and how they tickle me personally.
	Yeah, no, totally.
	But what I'm saying though is like, yeah, I get that.
	But it's such an easy thing to switch because in their mind, a PPP loan was the result of a pandemic and like something out of your hands completely.
	So they're not even, they don't even see that as the same thing.
	Right, okay, so... Like that, that was not a choice.
	Polymath here on Twitter has a similar, uh, makes a similar point.
	Where he says, uh, I'm trying to avoid the White House tweet, because it is legitimately the most stomach-turning thing I've seen in modern politics.
	The White House is attacking people who chose to cooperate with government to keep their employees paid, and the entire left is dancing with glee over it.
	Yeah.
	That's what I want.
	I want the tweet that says, we gave you this much money and you still laid off this many people.
	That's the tweet I want.
	I want the, we gave you this much money and you still fucked your employees over.
	It's still just going to be a tweet.
	Like it's still a tweet.
	At least it has more teeth to it.
	It's all political theater though.
	You know?
	Yeah.
	It just has more teeth to it to me that way.
	I just, I've never, you know, if we're talking about teeth in terms of like I've never seen a Democrat have even this much teeth to call out, to put in stark terms the differences between what they're saying and what they're doing.
	It was served up to the White House.
	This got its own news cycle.
	The White House doing this tweet, it got its own news cycle, which is rare for a Democratic own to even get a news cycle.
	It's not going to help me, or working people, or university students, or people in debt, that the White House got a news cycle.
	But it's funny.
	That's the main thing that I take away from it.
	And it's even funnier for people like political math.
	To look at a White House tweet that goes, this you, to Marjorie Taylor Greene and say this is one of the most revolting acts of political attack that I've ever seen.
	Just disgusting.
	In my years of covering politics, I've never seen somebody quote tweet and say, actually you got refunded 2.3 million dollars.
	I love, yeah, so the argument here, the White House is attacking people who chose to cooperate with government.
	Oh, you chose to cooperate with government to keep your business.
	To keep your business open.
	Okay, you didn't have to do that.
	You didn't have to.
	Like, chose to cooperate means accepted money from.
	Like, you could have not taken the money.
	You could have just closed up shop and taken the loss.
	Like, millions of business owners do, you know.
	I don't know how many businesses close a year, but it's probably a lot.
	It probably happens pretty frequently.
	Yeah.
	You know what I mean?
	Not only that, but you don't have to take all that money.
	You don't have to take that much money.
	You could have taken a smaller bit of money.
	And it's to keep their employees paid, is what the money was for.
	Bullshit.
	Because it's a pay, it's a quote, payroll loan, right?
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	And it's like, Yeah, okay.
	That money went to the employees, quote unquote.
	What happened to the money that the business normally would have to pay their employees out of their own pocket?
	Exactly.
	Exactly.
	It wasn't a loan.
	It wasn't like a direct payment to the employees.
	It was a payment to businesses who then didn't have to pay their employees because they got a loan.
	Because they got a forgiven loan.
	In most of these businesses, profits did not stop that much.
	A lot of these people didn't own brick and mortars that were closed down.
	A lot of these people did different things, you know?
	Dude, the best one that I saw... And close your ears, Tony, because this is a hypocrisy thing.
	But the best one that I saw was... Where is she?
	Pam Hebert, who replied to the White House account, said, I paid off two student loans.
	Where's my $20,000?
	Literally had $20,000 forgiven as a PPP loan.
	Just like that exact amount.
	More, $20,833.
	Like, come on.
	I mean, just be insane.
	Like that exact amount.
	More.
	$20,833.
	Like, come on.
	I mean, just the insane...
	You can't get that exact amount.
	And it's like...
	I feel like this is kind of like what we do on this show...
	It's not like pointing out forgiveness or anything.
	It's pointing out like the mindset of these people.
	Yeah.
	Of these so-called, you know, working class people or these so-called like regular Americans or these people who just, you know, think you should pull yourself up by your bootstraps or whatever.
	Showing the reality of what actually happens.
	It's not to like, try and shame Pam Herbert, because she's not capable of shame.
	If she's posting stuff like this, she hasn't been capable of shame for a long time.
	Yeah.
	A lot of people had similar reactions.
	Aaron Flint on Facebook says, I paid off my student loans in Afghanistan.
	Why did you get loans from Afghanistan?
	That's weird.
	Yeah, why'd you do that?
	Why did you pay off your student loans in Afghanistan?
	What were they doing over there, buddy?
	Yeah, I mean, did you have to wire it from Afghanistan to like the American bank you got it from?
	I don't understand.
	But then we got it.
	Joey Jones says, I cannot believe I gave two legs for my tuition.
	What a dope I am.
	Hoorah!
	Yeah, yeah, dawg.
	Like, yeah.
	You said it, man.
	I wouldn't say it, really, but you said it.
	I'm not a huge fan of those jokes, but when they make them themselves, it's like, come on, bud.
	Seems like an incredibly bad deal.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, super raw deal.
	Like, that's not fair.
	Yeah, Joey Jones is a Fox News and Fox Nation contributor and a quote, proud American.
	Yeah, missing both of his legs because he needed a college education.
	Um, a lot of people were posting stuff like this, thinking that it made them look good, uh, instead of both making them look obtuse and the system looking like a fucking meat grinder.
	So fucked.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Um, I saw some, I don't remember like who it is, uh, it's two wrestlers and it's, it's um, one of them's flipping off the other one.
	And it's like the guy who's getting flipped off is labeled, uh, me going to joining the military to get a college education.
	And then it's like Biden forgiving student loans, flipping them off.
	Yeah.
	And it's like, yeah.
	Why'd you post this?
	Like you got, you got really, you got fucked man.
	I wouldn't, you know, this is like when women are like, Yeah, well, I dated a guy who never washed his ass, and he used to leave food out on the table.
	He used to hide food in the cabinet so that it would spoil on purpose, you know?
	We need to really raise standards for men, or else I'm gonna keep dating guys like this continually.
	Keep getting fixer-uppers in this man economy, you know?
	It's really like vets posting L's.
	Posting their L's online.
	I don't know you got to be a little more literal than that too because I mean this is the same country where you know plenty of people lose legs but then they're like in medical debt forever because they lost them from diabetes like they don't get free anything they just get perpetual debt so like that's not everyone who loses legs can just trade that in for money dude Yeah, absolutely.
	And Jim Banks kind of sums it up right here.
	He's a representative in, looks like Indiana's third district here.
	He tweeted out, student loan forgiveness undermines one of our military's greatest recruitment tools at a time of dangerously low enlistments.
	So, like, these people, like, literally do not know when to stop posting.
	This is just, this, this, like, this little event, this little news cycle, like, was, was like, yeah, shooting fish in a barrel for, for just the most, like, the, the Republicans, right-wingers with the least amount of self-awareness.
	Yeah, because this is so true.
	You know, this is this is one of the many reasons that we don't make blanket statements against, you know, like veterans in general.
	You know, you can't just do that because there's so many people who, you know, are good people who are there, who got duped into being there by saying that they're going to have, you know, they can have a future.
	Yeah, yeah.
	And like, it's, it's, it's so, and it's just, like you said, say it out loud.
	When, yeah, enlistment's at an all-time low right now, which is fantastic.
	And yeah, that's one tool that they, I don't think they even took it away.
	I don't think that student loans are forgiven perpetually.
	I don't think I can just go get a loan now or go get free school now.
	That's not what's happening.
	No, not at all.
	But that's how it, that's how it feels.
	That's how, that's how I think it feels.
	And it's like, oh, that, that tool's very much there, but you're that scared because you know how powerful that tool is.
	Yeah, and it betrays the whole system where it's like, oh yeah, we deliberately make school a hard thing to get into so that we can then offer it as a perk to go do the imperialism for us.
	Um, it's, uh, it's very similar to, like, the idea of, uh, threatening working people with, essentially threatening them with, like, homelessness or unemployment, uh, as a means to get them to accept, uh, substandard wage.
	Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
	Yeah.
	It's really, like, shows you that, oh, we could do these things, it's just not in the interest because, uh, Yeah, because it doesn't make you as pliable of a subject if we do.
	Yeah, we don't want you to have like an option B that's viable.
	No thank you.
	Rather you lose your legs and then maybe get some education.
	Yeah, so just, um...
	Fun amount of posting.
	Like I said online, you know, if you need a token blue collar working person who didn't go to college to be, yeah, your friend who is okay with student loan forgiveness, I'll be that token friend for you.
	And I hope it doesn't come across as if I'm against student loan forgiveness because I'm not at all that way.
	I think this is excellent.
	No, you're just against the segment that I prepared for the show.
	That's all you're against.
	I mean, I mean, kinda.
	No, not really.
	I think it's great because it is so stupid.
	It's just so fucking stupid.
	Like, this is cool.
	This is a good thing.
	I hope that people do take this opportunity to take a little weight off their backs and maybe do something cool.
	Like, I don't know.
	I hope this is a good thing.
	But it's still not enough.
	Let's not at all pretend like this is enough.
	No, it's not enough at all.
	I know that $10,000 is like a small amount and how much they end up owing with everything.
	It's like, I don't owe anything, but I never went to school, so I can't relate to it, but I know you need more than that if you actually went to school.
	Like, come on.
	Yeah, I mean, it's ridiculous to see people's, the debt that they're in double while making, you know, the required payments every month, to see their student loans, like, not go down literally at all, you know, after years, after 10, 15 years of paying them.
	It's criminal!
	Like, the people who loaned them that money should be in jail.
	Should be thrown in fucking prison.
	And like, you know, the argument that, oh, it's not fair.
	It's not fair to the people who didn't go to college, who don't have student loan debt.
	It's not fair to us to pay for these things or whatever.
	And it's like...
	Yeah, lots of things aren't, quote, fair.
	Like, you might not have kids and you still have to pay taxes for public school.
	Yeah.
	Because it's a public good.
	It's a good thing.
	It's fair in the sense that it benefits all of us to have an educated population.
	Also, cool, if you don't like where your taxes are going, think about that in a grander scheme.
	Your taxes are going to a lot of shit you don't like.
	Like, this is nothing compared to everything else it's going to.
	Like, if you want to get petty, get fucking petty.
	Right.
	You know, that was our money that went to Ukraine.
	You know, if you're going through that route, that's still our money.
	They actually will complain about that.
	I've seen a lot of right-wing people.
	Oh, can I put Zelensky down as one of my dependents in this year's tax return?
	They are actually complaining about that.
	Good, good.
	One thing that is funny, though, we didn't talk about it on the show, but if you're online, you may have seen it.
	Like two weeks ago, You may remember that one of the number one, like, right-wing news cycles was about the IRS.
	It was about the IRS adding agents to inflate their numbers to, like, something like 80,000 IRS agents in total.
	Something like that.
	And also, like, equipping them with military hardware.
	I don't really know quite the details on that.
	Yeah, not very good.
	Never good.
	That video of them training was going around.
	Oh, was it a real video?
	Yeah, it's like a real video and they all have IRS flak vests on, you know?
	And they all have guns and they're doing a mock raid.
	But they're IRS agents.
	They're like little nerds.
	It's just so funny.
	Like it just, I don't know.
	Guns are guns.
	So you're going to be taking it seriously, but also you're watching this and you're like, Oh man, I really hope they don't come up against anything like serious.
	Cause they're fucked.
	These little nerds are going to get fucked up.
	Yeah.
	Um, The number one, like, response to that was like, oh, this is war.
	Like, fuck these guys, you know, this is war.
	I can't believe they would ever try to make me pay the taxes that I owe.
	Right?
	Like, I'm not a fan of the... Hey, listen, if you don't like it, buddy, go to Acapulco.
	I'm not a fan of the IRS by any means.
	Uh, I realize that the IRS, it's more, uh, affordable for them to target, you know, middle-class people, lower income people than it is to audit like millionaires and billionaires who can afford lawyers who can afford to like hide their money in shady ways that are harder to detect and take more manpower to comb through and figure out, you know, whether it's on the up and up or whatever.
	I realize all that.
	And I am not in favor of the IRS.
	As it currently stands.
	But it's very funny to be like, go from, how dare you try to come collect the money that I owe from the government?
	I will kill you.
	If you try to do this, I will kill you.
	To, just pay your friggin' student loans.
	How hard is it?
	Just pay what you owe.
	Just pay the sum that you were supposed to pay.
	Come on.
	Another instance of hypocrisy, but still funny.
	I think the problem is a lot of these student loans, they're like done with pen and paper, and there's not a lot of handshakes anymore.
	I think if we had more handshakes, I think there would be more, we wouldn't run into this problem, and then you know, then I would know that these fucking lackeys aren't getting my $10,000.
	My personal $10,000.
	Just to go out on this topic, I want to play a video from Facebook that's pretty good, that I think helps like, Guys, I just want to thank you so much for coming.
	against student loan forgiveness in a really good way.
	Are you ready, Tony? - Please.
	- Guys, I just wanna thank you so much for coming.
	I know that I don't know any of you, but I'm so happy to have you here to help me celebrate. - She is wearing a wig.
	She's in like, you know, a modern home.
	She's wearing a blonde wig.
	She's in a modern home and holding a wine glass with wine.
	So she's a liberal wine mom.
	Okay, so this voice is a joke.
	Yeah, this is how liberals sound.
	Okay, okay, okay.
	Today Biden announced that he is cutting like a lot of student loan debt.
	And that means that I can now be a lawyer in my daddy's firm.
	And I'm so excited!
	I'm going to stop right here because I don't know what that's supposed to mean.
	Yeah, I don't think that had anything to do... Was your daddy's firm saying, like, not until you pay that $10,000 of student loan debt off?
	What?
	I couldn't afford to work at my daddy's firm while I was paying off student loan debt.
	I had to have a different job to pay off the student loan debt before I could settle down and do my dream job of a lawyer.
	What?
	Yeah.
	It takes a long time to become a lawyer.
	I think maybe if you're a lawyer, you're making a little more money than that.
	I also think if you become a lawyer, you probably have more than $10,000 in student loan debt.
	I think it's a little more expensive to become a lawyer than that.
	Not to mention all the interest you would have accrued on that, what, I don't know, $500,000 worth of education?
	Like I'm just guessing.
	Easily.
	Probably somewhere around there.
	Easily.
	I was talking to someone who, he's a dentist, mind you, but he was talking about how him and one of his friends are on a race to a million.
	Oh my god.
	Yeah, and it's just so bad that he was like, what am I supposed to do about it?
	I gotta go become a dentist and I gotta go get my own practice.
	I have no option.
	This is what I have to do.
	I was like, yeah, go get it.
	I fucking hate dental work.
	Yeah, yeah.
	He's like, I fucking hate teeth.
	No, no, no.
	But I was like, wow, like, yeah, a race to a million.
	Okay, so the liberal mama, you know, this conservative mama pretending to be liberal mama, is happy she can be a lawyer now that Biden canceled $10,000 of student debt.
	And so she's brought everybody in the community there to congratulate her and to thank them for paying off the debt.
	I'm going to keep playing here.
	And I want to thank you.
	I want to thank you guys because you guys are the ones that are paying this loan, these loans, plural, off for me.
	What?
	Plural loans?
	I'm gonna keep going.
	I'm just so thankful.
	I'm so thankful.
	Thank you for doing this.
	Do you guys want to just go around and introduce yourselves and say who you are?
	Uh, yeah.
	My name's Toby.
	This is also Conservative Mama in a wig, in a different wig.
	But, you know, this isn't Conservative Mama.
	This is Conservative Toby.
	I never went to college.
	I'm a plumber.
	And this here is some real s***.
	So you're a plumber making $50 an hour.
	Okay.
	My name's Cindy.
	I am a small business owner.
	I own a bakery.
	And I never went to college.
	And to be honest, things are pretty tight for us financially right now.
	So I don't know how we're going to afford to do this for you.
	You could get a real job.
	You could get a different job, I think.
	Also, if you have a bakery that's not doing well, that's totally your fault at this point.
	That's on you.
	You could be making good money owning a little bakery.
	Not even good money, but money where you're not crying about your... They're not taking more money from you.
	It's the same.
	It's gone.
	Anyways.
	How much do you think Cindy, small business owner here, took in PPP loans that were forgiven?
	Oh, so much.
	Oh, so good.
	They bought an oven.
	They bought a new fucking oven with it.
	I just live like a small business owner.
	How am I supposed to keep running this business?
	Well, don't.
	No one's making you.
	Yeah, and like not, not, not to be like, you know, I don't know, ignorant, but so you didn't go to college.
	So like you didn't go to culinary school.
	Um, cause you would have to get loans for that too.
	Uh, you like own a bakery.
	Something happened along the ways that allowed you to like own a bakery.
	So you've got something cool up your sleeve.
	I don't know what it is, but it's something cool.
	Yeah.
	It sounds like you bought a business.
	Probably shut the fuck up about.
	Sounds like you had enough money to buy a business.
	Yeah.
	So the joke is that she brought, like, Richard Scarry's busy town into her home to thank them for paying taxes?
	It does have, like, 800,000 views on Facebook.
	And it's obviously a repost from TikTok where it probably has, you know, even more.
	Yeah, just make college free and we won't have to complain.
	We won't have to hear them complaining anymore.
	Yeah, that'd be cool.
	Yeah.
	Okay, so moving so moving on.
	You know, it wasn't all bad news this week.
	You know, the bad news being, of course, like a small segment of the population receiving a small portion of their debt forgiven.
	We did have some good news.
	A victory, frankly.
	A victory in the form of a small Missouri school district finally bringing back spanking.
	Hell yeah.
	Beautiful, triumph.
	Yeah, this has been a long day coming.
	If there's a nurse next to you, feel free to kiss her.
	Tell her what's going on first.
	Show her the podcast.
	Plug the podcast into her ears.
	And then when she looks at you, that's when you'll notice.
	You'll notice game time.
	Give her that smooch.
	Give her that smooch.
	They deserve.
	It's a big day for them.
	This has been a long time coming.
	And sure, not every school had actually gotten rid of corporal punishment.
	It still exists in some states.
	But it's nice to see that some states realized their mistake in banning it, or some school districts realized their mistake in taking it away, and have now brought it back.
	See, because the problem is, it's really the thing that's done wrong is the problem.
	It's what you do with that, that's the problem.
	And they, like you said, they are trying to really turn things around.
	I think that we're going to see kids, now that they're getting spanked again, those kids are going to go on to pay their student loan debts.
	Absolutely.
	I think that's all.
	I think that starts at school.
	Yeah, I mean, you'll find out because the kids who got spanked, well, they go into the military, typically.
	So that's why.
	This is reported in Fox News.
	It was reported on local news stations.
	So we just have a wonderful assortment of react, victory reactions, you know, elated responses to the idea of spanking small children.
	Hitting them for doing wrong stuff.
	Mainstream American here in the Fox News comment section says, ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY THE CORRECT THING TO DO!
	Uh-huh.
	All caps.
	And that's a mainstream American.
	So that's the pulse.
	This is the pulse of America right now.
	Segment over.
	We got it.
	That's amazing.
	This is absolutely positively the correct thing to do.
	I don't know, who are these awful kids that they're hanging out with?
	Oh my god.
	Never has the conservative fever dream of a Mad Max type dystopia ever been clearer than in these comment sections where we're talking about why we should bring paddling back.
	Yeah.
	Because apparently society is that episode of Futurama where Fry and his girlfriend, voiced by Sarah Silverman, think they go forward in time into a society that's run by lawless children.
	Yeah, because that's what they're thinking.
	I don't know.
	I'm like... I don't know.
	I got a kid.
	My kids are around other kids.
	They seem... I don't... I'm not looking at them thinking like we... The problem with these kids is they're not getting spanked.
	I'm not saying that.
	I'm not thinking that.
	I'm looking at these kids.
	Here's another endorsement here.
	Arnold says...
	I cam pretty much prof that the best thing ever happened to me was the beating to make me a good soldier and citizen of the USA.
	Why we need Trump.
	He done the best and his sons very presidential.
	Um, man, man, Arnold, like, it seems like things are not easy for you, Arnold.
	It seems like you're kind of maybe still going through some stuff that might, you might be misremembering the effects of the discipline, maybe.
	Yeah, how much other stuff can you not remember, Arnold?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I mean, trauma's interesting, you know?
	Trauma's a weird thing.
	You don't know what we do with that sometimes.
	I joked about how I forgot that one time Limp Bizkit played for Undertaker coming out during a WrestleMania.
	I forgot that happened, and it makes me wonder what else I've blocked out, you know?
	So if I forget something that cool, I probably forgot some other cool stuff.
	I think Arnold's maybe experiencing something similar.
	I think he might have like an Undertaker moment in your head that you forgot about.
	He might also just have dementia.
	Might be old, you know?
	Might be very old.
	I debated putting this comment in here because it seems like it could be fake.
	It seems like it could be... Like, I get beat, now I speak good.
	Yeah.
	Someone else has another sock account like yours?
	Yeah, except I don't do shit like this.
	Yeah, the beating make me good soldier.
	I love Trump.
	He the best.
	I don't know.
	I can't wholeheartedly endorse this comment.
	I tried to look at their posting history and it's private.
	Maybe that leans towards a troll because I don't know if this person writing this way would have the wherewithal to know how to make their account private.
	I also do like the part where you see a lot of talk of Don Jr., but you don't see necessarily presidential endorsements as often.
	I think they think he's sick and epic, but I don't think they're saying they're not ready to put him up to run yet.
	You can't do that.
	You can't disrespect the king that way.
	One of the indicators that this isn't a troll is just that it's not very funny.
	Yeah.
	You know, it doesn't say anything about like God, King, Trump or anything like that.
	It's just he's he's the best president.
	I love the president and his sons.
	Very presidential.
	I don't know.
	And then, yeah, Van Henry said, good, good.
	We're bringing back paddling.
	Good.
	Lack of discipline is why we have so many young people thinking the world owes them everything.
	Ding ding ding.
	Student loans.
	Yep.
	These younger generations, for the most part, are weak and will fail at keeping us free as we go into old age.
	I'm sure it's too late, obviously.
	I don't know where they get this from.
	People are literally larger than ever before.
	We are now bigger and stronger than ever before.
	Just our generation compared to that generation, I think we all average an inch or two on all of them.
	I just, what are you getting this from?
	I see people all the time that are just like jacked men.
	And I'm like, look at you giant men.
	They're like, I'm 17.
	And it's like, what are you getting this?
	Where are you getting this information from?
	I'm seeing giant kids.
	Yeah, I love this generation is too selfish.
	They're too self-centered.
	They're supposed to be serving me while I'm retiring on Medicare and Social Security and my pension that I probably have.
	What are you guys doing?
	You're supposed to be keeping me free, by which I mean changing my bedpan every 30 minutes.
	It also says something too, because if you have your own progeny, then you're not worried about that.
	If you have your own kids, then you raise your mind, they're going to be rubbing your feet for you when you're old, you know?
	But they don't have that same backup plan, so they are waiting for everyone else to do it.
	So yeah, you are mad at all the kids.
	Or your kids also ended up okay, so you hate them too.
	Yeah, the number one response to this was, um, yeah, we took away spanking and that's why, uh, kids are the way they are today.
	And, you know, that alludes to what you were talking about, Tony.
	And me, I'm like, I don't, I don't know.
	I don't see that many, like, gnarly kids, I guess.
	Like, I don't know where they're getting their info.
	Like, cause these are all older people, obviously.
	So are you just like sitting on your front porch and like making an itemized survey of how each kid in your neighborhood behaves?
	Or maybe you see a kid crying and you're like, a spanking would, would quiet that down right away.
	Right away, yeah.
	I think more likely is that they're watching the local news, which is just reposting TikToks of bad kids, like, every single night.
	Because I just got off the phone with my grandparents, alright?
	So...
	I love my grandparents.
	They're great.
	I lived with them for a long time.
	I was renting out a little loft above their barn for like eight years.
	They're some of the best humans on earth.
	Yeah.
	They're both liberal.
	They're pretty old, but they're both liberal.
	My grandpa was a union man.
	But even them, like we were talking and she was like, oh, there's just so much going on.
	You know, God, you know, my grandma's a worrier, right?
	She's just like, oh, this, the way things are, you know, she's like, how is it up there in your state?
	How are you guys dealing with everything?
	And I was like, dealing with what?
	Yeah.
	Like, what do you mean?
	Grammars?
	She was like, well, just, you know, like these people nowadays, you know, they just, They have, like, no respect, and they're just, like, doing whatever they want, and if you try to stop them, like, they get aggressive, and I'm like, what happened, Grammars?
	Like, what are you talking about?
	Yeah.
	She's like, well, I see, like, on LA, you know, they're, like, blocking off the streets so they can do donuts, and I'm like...
	Have you ever heard of a little franchise called Fast and the Furious, Grammars?
	They've been doing that stuff, that franchise is based on the stuff they've been doing since the 90s.
	And I think it's probably more safe if they block off the streets, as a matter of fact, if they're gonna do it.
	I was just like, kids have been joyriding in cars, you know, since they were invented?
	Like, uh...
	So it's, it's just, this is like the, the picture of America that people have that, especially older people, especially people who just watch local news or just watch cable news is that the kids aren't all right.
	Uh, the kids are just lawless Hellions who didn't get spanked enough.
	And that's why, uh, that's why they burned down Baltimore during, during the George Floyd uprising.
	It is because like, um, Yeah, it's all on TikTok now, whereas, you know, back then, you had to get, like, the Hot Import Nights video.
	And that's where you would, like, see that, and you would see, like, scantily clad women in, like, streets being blocked off and running from the police.
	But that was happening in, like, 1997, so, like, but yeah, it's just, it is just so readily available and recorded, which I do think we do gotta stop, we gotta stop posting so many, we're doing so much dry snitching, we need to chill.
	Oh, with like reposting TikTok stuff?
	Well, just posting them in general sometimes.
	Like, you gotta chill.
	We're dry snitching a whole lot.
	Sure.
	Um, but that's like, you know, even the well-meaning, like, liberal older people, they don't, like, it's not part of the human mind to be able to process, you know, this is cliche at this time, at this point, but it's not part of the human, like, brain to be able to process, like, statistics in the way where you see one, you see, like, a video every night of some asshole teens doing asshole shit.
	Yeah.
	You don't have, like, The frame of reference to be like, okay, that's one teen in a 700 million teen or whatever, you know what I mean?
	Like, yeah, you it's it's not, you're not evolved to think of things that way.
	And if you don't have like access to actual statistics, You won't know that, like, violent crime has dropped by, like, 200,000 cases, you know, since the year 2000.
	Crime is, like, going down, but it's these outlets bread and butter to keep people scared.
	And I'm, like, trying to say this stuff to my grandparents without sounding condescending.
	But it's like, it's never going to get through to them that way because that's not like the world they live in.
	They live in this world where it's, it's, you know, children run amok.
	Yeah.
	I mean, imagine seeing that video that I just saw of someone doing donuts.
	The guy gets hit by the guy doing donuts.
	The guy who gets hit lands on the ground.
	And as soon as it lands on the ground, he immediately pulls the biggest gun out of his pants with an extended clip.
	And then the clip just ends.
	And I'm like, Yeah, yeah, I guess.
	And like, he was a small guy, so they're probably like, oh, it's a child with a gun.
	Like, if I saw that and I had, you know, I'm not on the internet all the time, I would be like, what the fuck is going on?
	What is this?
	Spanking, man.
	You gotta spank the little ones.
	You should have spanked them.
	Especially.
	I got a ton of spanking videos if they need to see spanking.
	Oh no.
	I got, there's a lot of good... Hold your horses, we'll get there.
	Okay.
	Yeah, but it was just funny to have this conversation with my grandparents like half an hour before we started recording this episode.
	I'm just like, yeah, yep.
	Yeah, a lot of people were like, oh, we need to spank children to teach them to be respectful, right?
	Like all these kids, you know, doing the knockout game or doing the Orbeez challenge where they put frozen Orbeez and pull the trigger in the back of a cop's head and it blows their brains out.
	That's really popular on TikTok right now.
	I didn't know that was a thing!
	Frozen Orbeez is like, man, Orbeez fucking suck.
	No, that's, you, we, didn't we talk about, we talked about the Orbeez challenge, Tony, where it was you, you like shoot a passerby with Orbeez or whatever.
	And this, this made it to right-wing Facebook and right-wing, it made it to the police, first of all, who posted like about this, about this epidemic that was sweeping the nation.
	They like tried to ban the guns, right?
	They tried to ban the guns and they also shot a kid who was holding an Orbeez gun and blamed it on the Orbeez gun.
	The New York cops shot and killed a kid with a fucking Orbeez gun.
	They blamed it on the Orbeez challenge.
	That sucks so bad.
	Yeah, but if we had spankings, you would teach respect to children, teach them how to act in polite society.
	We know that that's how kids process stuff, is you hit them and then they learn how to be good once you hit them.
	Um, and example of this is like, uh, John posting into this Facebook group about spanking.
	He says, bringing back spanking is good.
	When I was in a Catholic school, it was a given.
	If a nun saw you holding a pen wrong, she'd whack you.
	And that was nothing to public school teachers back in the day.
	Only problem now is kids have guns.
	It's been so long, so long since there's been a lot in public schools.
	Uh, Catholic schools?
	I had a nun, um, who, like, I, I, I think, like, I, I, there was, like, a ruler thing, um, but nothing, like, wild, but it's been so long, like, how, like, no.
	This has not happened in a very long time, bud.
	No, I think some, some publics, like, some states haven't outlawed corporal punishment for students.
	Like, it's been upheld in the Supreme Court as constitutional.
	But it's been used since then?
	I think some states, people were saying some states still use it.
	I don't know.
	I don't live in those crazy wacky states.
	And I would never live there.
	I just fly over them motherfuckers, man.
	Just drown them all.
	Let a real rain come and wash them off.
	I'm just kidding.
	No, no, don't do that.
	Have a lot of friends in red states.
	No, this was good.
	Remember when you were a kid, if the nun saw you holding a pen wrong, she'd beat you.
	Yeah.
	And by holding a pen wrong, uh, he means, yeah, with your left hand.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Yeah, like, what, what, holding a pen, I, no, you're, that's, that sucked.
	You probably hate writing now.
	You probably don't like writing now.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Um, and then, uh, somebody, you know, disagreed.
	Now the kids have guns.
	Yeah, the kids have guns now.
	So yeah, spanking's not enough.
	You need to like, You need to, like, pistol whip them or something.
	Yeah.
	No, we can't.
	They just shoot us if we spank them now.
	Every single time I try to spank a kid, they just shoot me.
	So many people were doing, like, the Hillary Clinton super predators thing, where it was like, kids are too big nowadays.
	They'll fight back and get you in the hospital if you try to spank them.
	They're not weak!
	They're bigger and stronger than ever!
	But yeah, somebody else was like, oh no, this is a bad idea, actually.
	Like, hitting doesn't teach kids anything except that hitting is a way to respond to a situation you don't like.
	And John, the OP, replies, and obviously your parents never rated you right.
	Spoiled brat, I guess.
	Raised you right is what he meant to say.
	Raised you right.
	You're a spoiled brat because you disagreed with me.
	Amy replies, obviously something is wrong with you.
	I sure am spoiled.
	My husband and I have good jobs and we spoil ourselves.
	We also volunteer and help other people, which is very rewarding.
	And then John says, really, the only thing wrong with me is boy cheeking you to F clean off.
	Uh, so I think what he's saying, the only thing wrong with me is not telling you to fuck clean off.
	Yeah.
	Oh, fuck.
	Okay.
	Yeah, I get it.
	And then he also says, and by all those kids in your picture, good luck raising them and keeping them from killing other kids with a gun.
	And then, like, I just want to read this one comment real quick from Thomas.
	It's a similar comment in a different comment section.
	Thomas says, to somebody else who was saying, uh, spanking isn't a good way to teach kids.
	Uh, Thomas says, sure thing.
	Enjoy raising disrespectful entitled little shit bags.
	Sounds good.
	Oh man.
	And it's like every one of these people who was talking about how raising a child to be respectful is so important that we have to hit them to make it happen is also just blanketly calling strangers children shitbags on the internet.
	Yeah.
	It's an easy gotcha, too, where good luck keeping them from killing other kids with a gun.
	Every single kid who has killed other kids with guns was abused.
	Every single one.
	It's across the board.
	Well, sometimes it happens accidentally, but yeah.
	I mean what you're talking about, what John's talking about.
	Every single one of those kids was abused.
	Every single one.
	Yeah, probably.
	I feel pretty confident about that.
	I just love that it's like, we're trying to raise a respectful fucking society, you piece of shit asshole fucker whose children are probably scum.
	Probably a piece of shit.
	Fucking shit pack.
	It's just like so clear you don't actually care about being respectful in society.
	For one thing, you're on Facebook.
	Um, for another thing, yeah, you're cussing out a stranger who like politely disagreed with you.
	Um, I think maybe what it is, I think maybe you care less about like a respectful society than you do about like just hitting children.
	I think you just kind of want to hit children.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	It's just like some sort of security plan for you.
	It's like, well, at least, at least if I try to hit him, you know, it's like, is the VCR broken?
	Did you try hitting it yet?
	It's the same principle, you know, for all you VCR heads out there.
	I guess that's a slightly more updated reference than the Fonzie jukebox reference.
	I had to bring it up to scale.
	And then, yeah, in this comment section about nuns, David Blevins says, to this very day, 65 years later, if I see a nun dressed in her habit, I break out in a nervous, cold sweat.
	They scarred me for life, but I did learn how to write in cursive.
	Healthy.
	Healthy.
	Once again, I want to just brag again.
	My kid is learning cursive.
	It's pretty great.
	How many times did you have to hit her for that?
	Well, there's how many letters in the alphabet?
	26.
	At least 26.
	26.
	At least 26.
	I mean, who knows?
	Who knows what the left has added to that?
	That's true.
	Adding new letters to the letter, yeah, the letter mafia.
	I love that, like, that's so sick.
	Like, that sounds tight as fuck.
	But it's just, what are you talking about?
	Like, this did not work out well for you.
	You should be able to see a nun and be chill about it.
	Like, I think he's being serious.
	They scarred me for life, but I did learn how to write in cursive.
	I think he means that genuinely, which is insanely funny.
	Like, I mean, yeah, that's kind of what face, that's kind of like what Facebook politics are, is like, we've let these kids get away with too much.
	The second you stop hitting them, they don't learn cursive anymore.
	And so the only way to get it back, you know, we've tried it your way folks.
	Yeah.
	I'm going to beat the cursive into them.
	And the cool thing, like I said, bring it back to the school.
	Cause like I, the thing that was hard about homeschooling and I'm so happy that she's back in school is it was all me, you know, but now like I don't have to do all the hitting, like the teacher can do some.
	Yeah.
	And that, that's good.
	That takes them off my plate, you know?
	And like, that's, I think that's, that the cursive can be there.
	The respect will be here, you know?
	Oh, I hate that.
	I'm not, don't, I'm never, don't worry.
	Don't worry, y'all.
	Don't you worry about that.
	That'll never happen.
	Um, okay.
	The next little group of, of responses I wanted to talk about, uh, was people describing how spanking actually works and teachers love to do it.
	Hoagie Bear says, Vet teacher here.
	Years ago we had paddling.
	It did work.
	And as a teacher, I was often required to witness.
	The Napoleonic vice principal relished it.
	And even some of the roughest football players left his office crying.
	Swift and over and on with school.
	The kids hated it.
	So guess what?
	They knew how to avoid it.
	Uh, yeah?
	Like, that sucks.
	That sucks real bad.
	Spanking worked.
	The teachers love to do it, especially if they have like short man syndrome or like a chip on their shoulder for society.
	They're going to be the best spankers.
	HansD1976 says, I remember my fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Englehart.
	She was a soon-to-retire, 60-plus-year-old lady, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot.
	There was nothing she loved more than swinging that wooden paddle with holes to make the pain worse, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot.
	She used it on me a few times and I smiled with every swing.
	Oh, and she smiled with every swing.
	Of course, I deserved it.
	Wow.
	Wow.
	Stratocaster2015 replies, you're right, they loved paddling.
	My fifth grade teacher, Ms.
	Hardaway, parentheses, a perfect name, would use two hands.
	Oh, a perfect name.
	Again, this is gnarly.
	This is not good, y'all.
	have you grab your ankles for maximum effect.
	She would also make you wait for a long time outside the door and then make you go get the paddle.
	Ah, the good old days.
	I survived.
	Again, this is gnarly.
	This is not good, y'all.
	Like, you're, you're, you're, it's weird that you're romanticizing this.
	You have to, because how else do you deal with it?
	It's true.
	You would have to either go to therapy and learn to, like, forgive your teacher for being a human and abusing, like, relishing and abusing a bunch of kids or whatever, or you just have to, like, sublimate it into your personality.
	Be like, oh, this is why I'm the cool guy that I am now.
	It's because my teacher licked her lips and made me grab my ankles while she wailed on me with both hands.
	Yeah.
	And it's this thing, too, where I think you have to kind of romanticize it, too, because this might have been the bad thing that a loving person was doing.
	You know what I'm saying?
	And so you don't want to be like, well, they were completely terrible because of this thing.
	But you're allowed to do that.
	People forget you're allowed to hate them for this thing.
	Not being okay with this thing does not make you not okay with that person all the time.
	There's a way to do that.
	I think they forget that, so they have to romanticize it.
	No, it sucks.
	I got whoopins a couple times, and that sucked.
	That's something I don't think was okay, and I don't think it was effective.
	You're allowed to feel that way.
	Still, being Like you said, not compartmentalize, that's the wrong word, but you know, deal with it.
	Contextualize it, yeah.
	Yeah, contextualize it, deal with it, address it, you know, and not just be like, oh, you know, I am so happy that my mom used a belt because, you know, if she didn't, I don't think she was big enough to really, you know, make it effective.
	You don't have to do that.
	That's weird.
	Speaking of my grandma, one time when I was little, she used a chain on me.
	A chain?
	She fucking, she smacked me with like the dog leash chain.
	That sucks.
	Yeah.
	But it was, it was a rational, you know, it wasn't because I was, uh, annoying her to her wits end and she lashed out with the thing that she was already holding.
	Uh, no, it was a, she thought about it and she said, this is going to be the best discipline that I could possibly give this young, growing human being at this moment.
	And it will probably serve the purpose effectively.
	And before she did it, she said tradition and then proceeded.
	She said, salute.
	Smack.
	Yeah, yeah.
	It's like, yeah, yeah, you don't have to do it.
	Like you said, that is usually what's happening is you can contextualize it and, like, really actually address it and not just be like, I'm so grateful for it.
	You don't have to do that.
	I think the reason these people miss it is because they want to be able to do it.
	Like, they want to be able to be the person in that situation.
	You know, like, yeah, we got Roe v. Wade overturned, but I still don't get to hit the kids?
	Like, we got the kids here now.
	Like, now we should get to hit them.
	Yeah, and it's also that thing where it's part of growing up.
	So it makes you grow up.
	It teaches you respect.
	Spare the rod, spoil the child.
	Oh, I saw a lot of that.
	Saw a lot of that.
	Winmod97 in this same vein says, My father was the sergeant in arms of his college fraternity, TKE, and had a paddle with TKE burned into it.
	I had that, quote, burned into my rear end several times.
	Nope.
	Nope, that's not okay.
	You gotta get a different paddle for that.
	You can't use your frat paddle.
	You gotta use a different paddle for your kids.
	That's fucked up.
	Uh, yeah.
	You want to keep those line items separate, at least in your mind.
	And then Lucia Light replies, Yikes!
	We had TKE in my school too.
	They made all the pledges get branded.
	Yeah.
	So I looked into TKE after reading this, because Wynmod, again, his father was the sergeant in arms of the college fraternity, the TKE fraternity, and apparently, you know, loved his duties so much that he brought them home with him, which is why it's good, which is why this is a good thing.
	I did a little research.
	I looked up TKE hazing, and I found this Reddit post.
	I'm a member of Tau Kappa Epsilon who went through a hardcore hazing process and has hazed people.
	Ask me anything.
	It was a pretty serious five and a half week process, mentally and physically challenging.
	There was no homoerotic occurrences like the elephant walk.
	It was more or less a military style process with some more fucked up angles to it.
	Ask away.
	And so somebody said, uh, what were the fucked up angles?
	He says, well, we had to line up every night against a basement wall without making eye contact with the other brothers.
	There was endless pushups, TKE chair, which is wall sits, TKE TV, propping your body up on the concrete ground, using your elbows, skull crushers, placing your forehead on the wall with your feet as far back as possible.
	So literal torture, literal like enhanced interrogation techniques used by the U.S.
	government.
	Flares, Rick flares to the chest, which, what are those, Tony?
	I think those are slaps.
	Okay.
	Open hand slaps.
	Six inches.
	There was hoses in the face reminiscent of waterboarding.
	Being dropped off 18 miles from campus without a wallet and phone.
	Hell week!
	You're forced to take your shoes and socks off.
	Your sock goes in the mouth of the person to your right.
	Standing barefooted in snow brought into the basement.
	Couldn't feel my big toe for six months after pledging.
	We were made to sleep on the basement floor with a sheet in the pillow.
	Wednesday night we didn't stop doing physical activity without water until the sun shines into the basement.
	He then goes on to say about all the food you have to eat, the hot sauce they poured down your boxers.
	Oh, fuck.
	Uh, Saturday morning is the worst.
	That sucks.
	You are in jockstrap being pelted with uncooked rice, using baseball throws and slingshots for five hours.
	Um, afterwards they are initiated and you now have a scab the size of your torso.
	Jeez.
	So, seems like we could be doing a lot more in school.
	Five hours?
	Yeah, you're right.
	I think we can do more.
	I mean, I looked up TK and there was a slogan for making better men for a better world.
	Yeah, hell yeah.
	Amazing.
	Yeah, better men for a better world.
	Yeah, so I think that's definitely who we should be taking advice on discipline from, especially with, you know, children.
	Okay, these last few responses, I think, get down to the crux of the issue.
	I feel like we're showing our full colors here.
	You know, everybody's showing their hands with this last one.
	It is kind of funny for these conservatives who have been Waging a war against teachers, right?
	For, you know, a long time, but especially the last year.
	Uh, accusing them of being groomers.
	Uh, accusing them of sexualizing children and trying to, like, forcefully change their gender.
	Uh, that sort of thing.
	Are now happy that eager teachers will be able to make children bend over and grab their ankles while they repeatedly slap their bottoms.
	And, you know, people are like, why would, why would a conservative, you know, want this out of their, out of their groomer, liberal leftist teachers, you know?
	And I think what they're trying to do is they're trying to like lure them into a false sense of security.
	Right.
	So you let them spank them, you know, for discipline reasons, uh, for a while, you know, like a couple of years or whatever.
	Uh, and then when they start spanking them for like personal reasons, that's when you got them.
	Yeah.
	And you just had to really pay attention and you don't really know unless you let them do it.
	They'll probably get a lawyer and like try to call entrapment or whatever.
	Uh, but I think, I, I, I think you'd have a case.
	I think you could get them, get them gone.
	Yeah.
	Which is why we need to document it.
	All of it.
	It needs to all be recorded.
	Sniper Lawless 200 says, so will they be removing girls' underwear also when paddling?
	Oh no.
	Asking for Joe Biden.
	Oh, oh, okay.
	That's smart.
	That's smart.
	You can, okay.
	Cause it's not you.
	You're not the weirdo.
	Joe Biden's the one that needs to be asked.
	Joe Biden's the one.
	Joe Biden's the one who would think this.
	Yeah.
	Not me, the one who wrote it out.
	No way.
	I couldn't imagine typing that out and pressing enter on any website.
	You can't do that.
	You shouldn't be allowed to.
	The comment section should reject it.
	Spit it back out at you.
	Your keyboard should lock your fingers to it and then someone comes and picks you up.
	Yeah, your laptop should eat your hands like in a cartoon horror movie or something.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Yeah, I love this.
	We're not the freaks who love spanking children.
	It's Joe Biden, right?
	Just every other comment is about, yeah, romanticizing their own spankings or else fantasizing about doing it to lawless children like this one.
	Shofie256 says, now I really want live video in the classrooms.
	When little 17-year-old Tatiana gets a spanking, it could be pay-per-view.
	No, no, no, no, no.
	Uh, no.
	What are you doing?
	Shofi, you prison.
	What are you doing?
	I like, but okay.
	Yes.
	I do think that there is some, like, if you're, if you're going to hit the kids, I do need to, I do need to be recorded.
	I don't necessarily need to watch it, but it doesn't need to be recorded because that will, you know, maybe at least have a little bit of accountability there.
	Um, but.
	What the f- Like, you've been already wanting- You were already wanting a livestream of schools, but now you, like, really want it?
	And, um... Why'd you name her?
	Why'd you do that to Tatiana?
	So, that's the thing.
	This is what I'm trying to figure out, okay?
	Because he says 17-year-old Tatiana, so... He could have gone 18 and, like...
	Made it legally acceptable for him to be fantasizing about a high school girl getting spanked if she's 18, but he didn't.
	He said 17.
	He also said little.
	He also said little 17 year old.
	And he gave her the name Tatiana.
	Does he think, maybe this is a stretch, maybe this is because I've been doing this show for so long, does he think that's a black name and not like a Russian name?
	Oh, you know, it's I think it's one of those two, though.
	I think it's I think it's one of those two.
	I think it's I think.
	Yeah, I think I think he tried to, like, make her ethnic with that name.
	Does he think Tatiana is like Tiana?
	You know, does he think that's like a like a black name?
	I think so.
	I think so.
	I think he revealed a lot here.
	Yeah, I think that's what he's talking about.
	He's like, finally.
	I'll finally get to see some comeuppance for these little thugs.
	These 17-year-old thugs.
	It could be pay-per-view.
	Can you even get pay-per-view porno anymore?
	Is that even a thing you can do?
	I don't know.
	Talk to my cable provider.
	Are kids still ordering it and then thinking if they just turn it off immediately or unplug it once it's done, their parents won't get charged?
	Is that still happening?
	I think you can go to like a hotel and get pay-per-view still.
	Oh, okay.
	Cool.
	Cool.
	But can I, can I remove the SIM card from the cable box after I press order to, so it doesn't go on the bill?
	Um, which doesn't work, but you can try it just in case.
	I love him being like, no, I'm not a pervert.
	I just hate black girls.
	It's because I don't, I don't like black girls actually.
	It's not that I like them.
	I don't like them.
	And like, how could I?
	They're so bad.
	Like, oh my god.
	Go, go, go search this computer.
	FBI.
	I think what he was, he was trying to be, he was intentionally being racist and only accidentally being a pervert.
	Okay, I think you're right.
	I think that's what happened.
	I think you're right.
	I think that makes sense.
	Last comment here.
	This one I loved.
	From SteelheadLivesMatter in the Smoker.
	Yes!
	Cool!
	One of the funniest usernames I've seen in a while.
	Steelhead Lives Matter in the Smoker.
	Steelhead, that's like a fish, right?
	Yeah, yeah.
	It's a very specific fish.
	I guess, like, are you known for your smoked steelhead?
	Is that your shit?
	But okay, so let's break this down real quick.
	Let's get pedantic about it.
	Okay, so Steelhead Lives Matter is obviously making fun of Black Lives Matter or something.
	But you're supposed to do it for something like you actually care, like white lives matter, the obvious one.
	Or you could be like, Oh, pizza lives matter, bro.
	Like I love pizza, you know, something like that.
	This is steelhead lives matter in the smoker.
	So like, you're just like abandoning totally the pretense of being on the side of the thing that's in lives matter.
	It's a thing you want to kill and then put in your smoker.
	I don't like, it's just, they only matter when they're in the smoker.
	The Lives Matter part is just, it's like the I Did That Joe Brandon sticker.
	Just putting an I Did That sticker on the rear bumper of your car.
	On your phone.
	He's not pointing to anything.
	Yeah, putting it on the back of your phone case.
	Like, he's pointing, but it's not at anything he did.
	You just like the funny picture.
	You just hear him saying, I did that!
	You know, next to high prices in your head when you look at the...
	Photo and it's the same thing with with steelhead lives matter in the smoker.
	You're just repeating phrases that you've heard that you like.
	But you would you would get it if you knew steelhead lives matter in the smoker.
	If you knew them you would totally you would totally understand.
	Also like when you put that Joe Brandon sticker on things what he's doing he's pointing to society.
	Oh, fuck.
	Yeah, he did all that.
	And society's so bad right now.
	So bad right now.
	It's pointing at some kid beating up an old lady.
	Some child beating up an old lady for no reason.
	Yeah, yeah.
	But the comment from Steelhead Lives Matter in the Fox News comment section says about bringing paddling back.
	Can you imagine a limp-wristed liberal superintendent paddling a kid that doesn't agree with their woke propaganda teachings?
	They might end up hurting themselves with that much physical output.
	What?
	Like, is that what you think is happening?
	That's what you think is happening?
	You think that the lib is, like, the one who's eager to, like, paddle the kids?
	And that they're gonna paddle the kids for, like, not being woke?
	You think the kids are getting paddled for not using pronouns?
	Is that what you think is happening?
	Yeah, I literally saw that comment like once or twice.
	Most people were enthusiastically in favor of teachers hitting children.
	Most people loved this idea.
	They wished they were young enough to still stand up on their own so they could teach a classroom and swat a kid.
	There were a couple people who were like, oh, the teachers are only gonna paddle white Republican students.
	Those are the real ones.
	Those are real ones right there.
	They're the ones who've been about this the whole time.
	And then I saw another one that was like, little Timmy, you didn't learn your pronouns.
	And then little Timmy says, my incorrect pronouns identify as correct pronouns.
	And then teacher says, Timmy, you're getting the paddle.
	Yep.
	Yep.
	That's exactly what would happen.
	Timmy was being a little, little smart ass right there.
	Timmy was not being respectful.
	So I think it still goes along the line of what they're saying.
	Totally.
	This one though, I love this one because he's imagining a gay, weak superintendent not being able to successfully paddle just a buff, stout, strong, conservative child whose buttocks are probably firm as hell, well-rounded.
	Just try to make a dent on this kid.
	Have you seen what he's working with?
	You know who this kid is?
	Did you see the Little League World Series kid who hit a home run while wearing work gloves?
	No.
	That's awesome.
	He was wearing leather work gloves and everyone was just like, this is so rugged.
	This is so down home.
	But I'm like, no, those gloves cost as much as batting gloves.
	Yeah, I would just say he already had them or something.
	You can still get batting gloves.
	They were brand new.
	He was trying to do a country boy thing.
	Oh, okay.
	Yeah.
	This kid's old enough to be... He was doing a country boy thing.
	They were just like, this is it.
	That's the kid who this superintendent can't swat.
	It's that kid.
	You call that a swing?
	Just like laughing as this super, as this weak, sissy, like dick-sucking superintendent, you know, takes his eyes off the glory hole long enough to try and spank you and just breaks his freaking hand.
	He's, ow!
	Yeah, splinters, ow!
	Blisters, ouchie!
	Yeah, maybe he'll think twice again.
	Yeah.
	Complain about your manicure, you know?
	He probably would break a nail, huh?
	Yeah.
	You'd probably break a nail on that kid's robust buttocks.
	Yeah, you know that fool has carpal tunnel.
	Well, that's the episode.
	We're so happy Spanking's back.
	We're not happy that people got debt relief, but that's life.
	You win some, you lose some.
	Yeah, balance.
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	Bye.
	Peace.
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	You went away and I'm falling.

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