Minion Death Cult - The "All Cops Ain't Bad" Comedy Tour (preview)
Aired: 2022-05-19
Duration: 03:20


=== Officer Keep It Real's Fake Bit (03:20) ===

[00:00:00]  Let's hear another bit from Officer Keep It Real.
[00:00:04]  Okay, so this one's definitely fake.
[00:00:13]  Why is that a laugh line?
[00:00:14]  Because he decided it should be a laugh line.
[00:00:17]  He decided the audience would be laughing at this point if there were one.
[00:00:21]  This is, uh, that's how he's sitting in front of a green screen that looks like a red curtain.
[00:00:26]  He's sitting on a stool and he's got a microphone that's not plugged in to anything.
[00:00:32]  I think it's just like a room recording with a fake microphone.
[00:00:35]  It's a wireless mic.
[00:00:37]  Don't worry about it.
[00:00:38]  Perhaps.
[00:00:39]  He has an earpiece that you couldn't afford.
[00:00:41]  Don't worry about it.
[00:00:42]  Dude, he's got his little, like, police, uh, Photo, what do you call it, like official police photo in the bottom right corner?
[00:00:52]  The problem with black folks and the cops is there's never been much of a trust factor there.
[00:00:58]  That's rightfully so, cops.
[00:00:59]  You got to give us a break on this thing.
[00:01:01]  Cops are looking at black people says, man, it's I'd love to whoop his ass, but Jim, it's too goddamn expensive.
[00:01:09]  Lose my house, my pension, my paycheck and my wife.
[00:01:13]  What?
[00:01:18]  Yeah.
[00:01:19]  See, now we're getting some insight into the mindset of police.
[00:01:24]  I love this format, hearing a cop comedian, because you get to hear a cop tell what's going on, which is like, man, they want to beat up even more black guys, but it's too damn expensive.
[00:01:34]  No, I got it.
[00:01:36]  He's keeping it real.
[00:01:37]  I got to say something.
[00:01:38]  I'm the only one that can say this thing.
[00:01:40]  The thing about Officer Keep It Real is Officer Keep It Real looks very black.
[00:01:46]  It is unmistakably black.
[00:01:48]  There is no light-skinnedness about him.
[00:01:51]  He is never going to get misidentified as a non-black person.
[00:01:58]  This is not going to happen.
[00:02:00]  I want to get that right out of the way.
[00:02:03]  There is nothing... talk about him.
[00:02:05]  He's very black.
[00:02:09]  So for him to be saying this is funny because I think that my man was still, like, cucked.
[00:02:15]  I think my man was still, like, cucked by, like, a somehow blacker guy?
[00:02:20]  Like, maybe just by virtue of not being a cop.
[00:02:23]  Like, just by virtue of not being a cop.
[00:02:27]  You mean, like, actually romantically cucked?
[00:02:30]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:02:32]  Because he said, your wife is going to start fucking a black guy.
[00:02:35]  He said that right now.
[00:02:35]  Yeah, I was thinking he was maybe the dork in that meme where the chick chooses the hood guy over the dude in the tie and shit.
[00:02:45]  He has heavy nerd vibes, though, by the way.
[00:02:48]  You're totally right about that.
[00:02:49]  He's got like he's definitely a guy that is not cool.
[00:02:53]  And what that white person impression kind of rolled off the tongue, it seemed like.
[00:02:58]  You know what I thought?
[00:02:59]  You know what I thought was really is real interesting about that, too, is like, I don't think, and maybe I'm wrong, I don't think I've ever heard a black guy do the joke about white wives leaving for black men.
[00:03:16]  I don't think, maybe I have.
[00:03:19]  Tony does that joke every episode.