All of Hollywood needs to bo slapped (preview)
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March 31, 2022 - Minion Death Cult
05:25
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| Time | Text |
|---|---|
| First, we do have to address, yeah, this crazy slap that happened. | |
| Will Smith slapped Chris Rock at the Oscars. | |
| We're not sick of talking about it. | |
| We'd love to talk about it. | |
| It happened. | |
| It's the best thing I've ever had in my life, actually. | |
| I'm sure the listeners love hearing about it on a podcast three days after it happened. | |
| So thank you for paying money for this. | |
| You're the best as far as there should be an Oscars for the listeners. | |
| As far as I'm concerned, you would all win. | |
| No runners up. | |
| Well, I mean, like, you know, the particular lane that we find ourselves in, there's not very many people I think are qualified to be talking about this. | |
| We had to do it. | |
| There's something about this show that I think does separate us from other people, that does make us different than the other shows that might be similar to us, that might be tagged in the same, like, what podcast are you listening to, type list. | |
| It's because we're handsome. | |
| It's because we're really handsome, just like Will Smith. | |
| So yeah, I mean, you touched on it. | |
| You basically, our profession, Tony, as people who speak truth to power for a living, you know, in the form where it could be podcasting, it could be stand-up comedian-ing. | |
| Oh, yep, uh-huh. | |
| This slap was terrifying. | |
| Yeah, not only the slap, but the fallout from the slap is what was really scary to me. | |
| I don't know how to feel exactly about that, but the fallout was really scary to me. | |
| The fallout is good. | |
| People are trying to get Will Smith arrested. | |
| Saying, hey, can I file assault charges on behalf of someone else? | |
| And I think we should be looking into that as a society about whether or not you can get somebody arrested for doing something that another person is too afraid to call the cops on them for. | |
| I don't think that's even enough. | |
| I think that we need to be able to press hypothetical charges. | |
| Like, I've been thinking about, what if it was somebody else he slapped? | |
| I think we should press charges for all those hypotheticals. | |
| I think that's the way to go. | |
| Well, I think that's a lot of, maybe some sort of like, what's the word that a lot of people are suing one person? | |
| Like, what's a class action lawsuit for all the hypotheticals that we've thought about that are important? | |
| I think the people of Ukraine have a case against Will Smith, frankly. | |
| Fuck. | |
| Yeah. | |
| The sort of violence he's helping to normalize. | |
| If you look at the way his hand was cupped and shaped, it did look a little like Russia. | |
| It looked like the sickle. | |
| It did look a little bit like the outline of Russia. | |
| It's like, it's going to have a chilling effect on what you can say, you know, to a powerful audience, like the members of the Oscars, who I used to adore and love. | |
| And now I'm like, what? | |
| You know, like, imagine if when Jon Stewart was talking to Barack Obama, you know, Jon Stewart, famous comedian, you know, this isn't like that crazy of a hypothetical. | |
| When he were talking to Barack Obama and Barack Obama was like, yeah, Timothy Geithner did a heck of a job during the recession. | |
| And Jon Stewart was like, are you sure you want to use that phrase there, Mr. Obama? | |
| You sure that's it? | |
| You sure you want to say recession? | |
| Are you sure you want to say heck of a job, you know? | |
| And then, what if Obama had just open-palmed, slapped Jon Stewart right then? | |
| Yeah, you wouldn't be laughing as much now. | |
| I don't know if I would. | |
| I don't know if I would be laughing as much. | |
| I'd probably do that thing where you like, you know when something becomes so loud it becomes silent? | |
| Mm-hmm. | |
| That might have been what happened, actually. | |
| Yeah, the silence is deafening. | |
| Screams. | |
| Yeah, it's like how my girlfriend hasn't tweeted once about women in her whole Twitter career. | |
| I found that out, by the way. | |
| Audie, no tweets about women. | |
| Hey, I'm just happy you're saying this behind the paywall. | |
| You know, we might lose some Patreons from this, but I'm happy you're saying it behind the paywall. | |
| We might lose some girlfriends. | |
| It's bad. | |
| We might lose some girlfriends. | |
| Which, I mean, arguably, I maybe might not get the bonus episodes, but it is for sure, like, all the girlfriends are basically Patreons. | |
| Yeah, I just, you know, I think, hey, you know, what about me? | |
| What about me when I'm just trying to do my job and, like, make fun of somebody's wife? | |
| Well, like, not only that, you know, I don't even want to make it personal, like, what if I want to make a really, really outdated joke? | |
| What if I want to make a joke about a movie that came out in 1997 that no one really even knows or cares about? | |
| Is it even 97? | |
| It's 97. | |
| Feels like it was 93. | |
| You know, what if I want to do that? | |
| Yeah. | |
| You know, what if I, what if I, what if I, you know, actually, I was gonna make a, I was gonna make a powder joke tonight. | |
| I was gonna make a joke about powder tonight, but I don't know if I can even do that. | |
| I know it's Skype, but what if you, like, emotion, like, what if you energy slap me? | |
| Uh, I heard your, uh, your wife's colorblind. | |
| Uh, red light, green light! | |
| Like from Mission Impossible when he smashes the gun together. | |
| You don't even know. | |
| You couldn't even use the gun from Mission Impossible 1 because you wouldn't know. |
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