Andrew Klavan Show - Klavan REACTS To These Unwoke Comedians
Aired: 2026-02-05
Duration: 10:46


=== Comedians and Philosophers (06:18) ===

[00:00:00]  All right, what am I looking at today?
[00:00:01]  I'm looking at comedians.
[00:00:03]  And comedians are actually kind of interesting because they pick up on things that are in the atmosphere and you will find new subjects coming up that weren't there before.
[00:00:12]  And so that's what we'll be talking about because these are very recent comedy shows.
[00:00:16]  And one of the most important things to know about comedians is they make very good comedians and very bad philosophers.
[00:00:23]  So we're going to see if they're philosophizing, we'll see how bad they are.
[00:00:26]  And if they're doing comedy, we'll see if they're any good.
[00:00:31]  All right, let's take a look at the first one.
[00:00:33]  My parents, they got divorced when I was about 10.
[00:00:35]  And I have kids now, and their parents are divorced also.
[00:00:40]  I remember when we told our kids that we were going to divorce.
[00:00:44]  Get divorced, you should tell your children.
[00:00:47]  So we had to do it carefully because they were five and two years old at the time.
[00:00:51]  So we had to put it in a way that they could comprehend.
[00:00:54]  So I remember we sat them down and I said, okay, listen, you know how you love your dog?
[00:00:59]  You love your dog.
[00:01:00]  Like sometimes you give your dog food from your plate.
[00:01:02]  You're not supposed to, but you do that because you love your dog.
[00:01:05]  Remember the other day your mom and I were like, don't give the dog any ham, but you did because you love your dog.
[00:01:11]  Okay, so that's why we're getting a divorce.
[00:01:15]  Because you don't listen.
[00:01:19]  We just can't take it anymore.
[00:01:20]  It's just too hard to not be listened to.
[00:01:25]  So we're going to move to separate homes and each have you for half the week because neither of us wants to have you all the time anymore.
[00:01:31]  That's Luis C.K. Always good to see that he's back and that he overcame the disgusting things that he was doing that got him canceled.
[00:01:40]  And that's a very funny routine about the fact that he's obviously a terrible human being.
[00:01:45]  Because if you get divorced when your kids are five and two, you deserve to go to hell.
[00:01:49]  I'm sorry.
[00:01:49]  That is a terrible thing.
[00:01:51]  You have just essentially blown your children's planet up.
[00:02:00]  Marriage is the planet your children live in and you've blown it up.
[00:02:02]  So at least at least his jokes was about what a terrible person he was.
[00:02:06]  And he's always incredibly funny.
[00:02:08]  He's a really funny comic.
[00:02:09]  In my experience, black people are less uptight about race than white people are.
[00:02:16]  I used to drive DoorDash in a ski town and let's be honest, not a lot of black people ski.
[00:02:21]  So I was driving DoorDash and I pulled into a busy parking lot and I called up my guy.
[00:02:25]  I said, hey, I got your food.
[00:02:27]  I'm in a silver Nissan rogue.
[00:02:29]  And he said, all right, I'm black.
[00:02:35]  I found him.
[00:02:37]  I was surprised he said that.
[00:02:39]  But he was being helpful because there were more silver Nissan rogues than black people in that parking lot.
[00:02:46]  All right, that's Trevor Lewis.
[00:02:47]  That was mildly amusing, I would say, but it was kind of relaxed.
[00:02:51]  It's kind of the woke cloud seems to have passed a little bit.
[00:02:55]  Let's hope that's true because woke was the death of comedy as it was the death of creativity.
[00:02:59]  It was the death of plotting.
[00:03:00]  It was the death of casting.
[00:03:01]  It was the death of art.
[00:03:03]  During the woke period, art died.
[00:03:05]  There was almost no good material that was not being written by me.
[00:03:09]  That is why you should only buy my books because I was there when there was nothing else to read and I'm still here now and you should support me.
[00:03:17]  So that was mildly amusing, but at least it was relaxed.
[00:03:21]  All right, here is Sean Jordan.
[00:03:23]  I have to say, I've never heard of these guys, so they're pretty new.
[00:03:26]  Let's see what he has to say.
[00:03:27]  I have a daughter.
[00:03:28]  Sure, you can tell by looking at me.
[00:03:30]  She was actually born in this blanket.
[00:03:33]  Seriously, we watched it, but she was born in this.
[00:03:36]  Our little miracle, I love her so much.
[00:03:38]  We went through IVF to get our daughter.
[00:03:40]  You guys know what IVF is?
[00:03:41]  It's expensive.
[00:03:42]  That's what it is.
[00:03:45]  About $20,000.
[00:03:47]  People ask if I'm going to bring that up to our daughter, if I'm ever going to mention that she cost $20,000.
[00:03:55]  If that's ever going to like work its way into a conversation naturally, that she cost $20,000 American dollar.
[00:04:03]  Yeah, I'm going to bring that up.
[00:04:07]  Of course, that's insane.
[00:04:08]  It's hard to talk about something else when somebody owes you $20,000.
[00:04:16]  Probably more like $30,000 by the time she finishes college, actually.
[00:04:20]  Which she will do.
[00:04:21]  All right.
[00:04:21]  She's going to go to the University of South Dakota and finish what her father started.
[00:04:26]  All right.
[00:04:27]  Again, mildly amusing, but also kind of nice, parenthood and honest about parenthood.
[00:04:34]  I try to bring up every penny I spent on my children, almost every time I see them, I think.
[00:04:39]  And, you know, and then just remind them that they owe me so big that they never really pay me back.
[00:04:44]  But they should try.
[00:04:45]  They should try, but it's an impossible thing.
[00:04:47]  So, yeah, that was all right.
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=== Family-Focused Humor (04:27) ===

[00:06:18]  We grew up like wild dogs in the 60s.
[00:06:23]  There was no nutrition.
[00:06:26]  Nothing of knowledge of nutrition, education, safety.
[00:06:32]  Can you even imagine the world I am describing?
[00:06:38]  No helmets, no seatbelts, no restraints.
[00:06:41]  Anything came to a stop.
[00:06:43]  We just flew through the air.
[00:06:47]  I was either eating 100% sugar or airborne.
[00:06:54]  That was my childhood.
[00:06:56]  My parents, they did not know where my school was.
[00:07:00]  They did not know what my grades were.
[00:07:02]  They didn't know where I was.
[00:07:04]  I was like a raccoon to my parents.
[00:07:07]  You know there's one around, but no one's tracking the actual whereabouts.
[00:07:12]  That's pretty funny.
[00:07:13]  The thing about Seinfeld is I've never really liked him.
[00:07:17]  George, is this funny?
[00:07:19]  It's funny.
[00:07:20]  You know, like I don't, I don't connect with him in some way, but he's genuinely funny.
[00:07:24]  He's just a genuinely talented writer and comedian.
[00:07:28]  And that's funny.
[00:07:29]  And I'm noticing now, I don't know if this is because I didn't select these.
[00:07:32]  So I don't know if this is because of the way they're picked, but family-oriented, kind of clean.
[00:07:37]  I mean, for a while, for a while, I think it started with Robin Williams, who did it.
[00:07:42]  His version of it was hilarious.
[00:07:43]  But for a while, every comedian was talking in this minute detail about their private parts, you know, like a little slice of hail in that room.
[00:07:52]  It's not that funny.
[00:07:53]  And it's also like if somebody were talking to me like this on the street, I would be edging away.
[00:07:57]  And it's not making me laugh.
[00:07:59]  So these guys at least are amusing so far.
[00:08:01]  These clips are amusing, and they're kind of about life.
[00:08:04]  This is one thing I've always liked about Louis C.K. that when he talks about sex, he's nowhere near as funny as when he just talks about ordinary life.
[00:08:10]  And I think observational comedy is where these guys should be, and they haven't been for a long time because anybody can stick his head up his own backside and describe it, which is a lot of what they've been doing.
[00:08:20]  So interesting, promising, I would say.
[00:08:22]  I'm not hearing anything that's cracking me up except for Louis C.K.
[00:08:26]  That was really the funniest one.
[00:08:27]  But it's promising.
[00:08:28]  I like that they're moving into more interesting subjects.
[00:08:31]  Go.
[00:08:32]  I've just been watching this durant stuff.
[00:08:33]  It's so sad.
[00:08:34]  It's like protests and kids crying and people getting killed.
[00:08:37]  And I realize, oh, this is Minnesota.
[00:08:42]  What the hell's going on in Minnesota?
[00:08:45]  Holy shit.
[00:08:45]  Did that state walk under a ladder?
[00:08:47]  I mean, it's just such bad luck over there.
[00:08:50]  It's like George Floyd and the Somali daycare shit.
[00:08:54]  Now this ice shooting, it's, I don't care what side of the aisle you're on.
[00:08:57]  This ice shooting is horrible.
[00:08:59]  It's a bummer.
[00:08:59]  I mean, who are they hiring?
[00:09:00]  Alec Baldwin?
[00:09:04]  Lady in the face.
[00:09:06]  Holy hell.
[00:09:09]  Oh, man.
[00:09:09]  That cop, he's a real Dick Cheney.
[00:09:12]  But holy moly.
[00:09:15]  I don't know.
[00:09:15]  Maybe Derek Chauvin and that cop should start a podcast called The Pizza Twins.
[00:09:20]  Okay.
[00:09:21]  Too much?
[00:09:22]  All right.
[00:09:23]  I feel bad for Tim Walz.
[00:09:24]  I mean, that guy, he looks like a Pixar dad.
[00:09:27]  But I don't know what he's going to do.
[00:09:30]  He's got to move to Greenland or something.
[00:09:31]  I don't know where he's going to go.
[00:09:34]  Okay, okay.
[00:09:36]  All right.
[00:09:37]  I thought that was funny.
[00:09:38]  He got it.
[00:09:38]  All right.
[00:09:39]  Don't look, will you?
[00:09:40]  All right.
[00:09:40]  These are just swastikas I'm drawing.
[00:09:44]  I like this guy's style.
[00:09:46]  Pretty funny.
[00:09:47]  You know, the little funny leftist stuff.
[00:09:51]  Yeah, you know, that was, I got to say, that was pretty mild political humor.
[00:09:55]  You know, I mean, it's been a long time since I've had to, since I've listened to political humor that didn't offend me, even though I was disagreeing with some of it.
[00:10:02]  It's just like it's been, political humor has been so mean.
[00:10:05]  Why do you have to be meh?
[00:10:07]  So I like that.
[00:10:07]  I liked his style, too.
[00:10:09]  I thought he was promising too.
[00:10:11]  Better material, but he could use better material, but his style is good.
[00:10:14]  So what I would say, if that is a representative selection of stand-up comedy, they're moving into more accessible material.
[00:10:25]  Not every other word is an F-word and not everything is about sex.
[00:10:29]  And they're actually talking about life, which I think would be a big, big improvement.
[00:10:33]  Because for a while, because of woke, things stopped being funny, they stopped being dramatic, they stopped being interesting.
[00:10:38]  And that would be really lovely if the creative world started to blossom again.
[00:10:42]  And comedians are oftentimes in the forefront of any movement.