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Oct. 16, 2025 - Andrew Klavan Show
13:19
My Antidote For Gen Zers That Are Divorcing Or Considering It

Gen Z’s divorce surge stems from "selfish" modern expectations—like women abandoning motherhood or men shirking parenting duties—claims the 25-year-old ex-Mormon speaker, who left their marriage amid chronic illness (endometriosis, PCOS) and ideological deconstruction. They blame feminism for prioritizing individualism over shared marital roles, framing traditional gender dynamics as "natural order" while mocking their own queer transition and conservative critiques. Despite acknowledging men should engage more in childcare, they argue co-parenting signals failed commitment, urging alignment with rigid family structures to avoid divorce. The episode’s core: societal instability—from LGBTQ+ rights to Palestine—fuels Gen Z’s rejection of marriage, but the speaker insists traditional roles are the antidote. [Automatically generated summary]

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Why Gen Z Divorces Happen 00:03:31
So today I'm going to watch Gen Zers, mostly Gen Zers I think, talk about their divorces.
Gen Zers are like 12 years old, right?
So this should be interesting why they got divorced when they were 12.
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All right, so let's take a look at this.
Now, this is an important deal because a lot of people, especially among my fellow Christians, a lot of people are always talking about this kind of sex, that kind of sex.
But one of the things that Jesus came down really hard about is divorce.
And I've always said that if you have children, especially and you get divorced, you are blowing up your child's planet.
And so, you know, maybe you want to think about it and go to some couples therapy and all this stuff.
But I have seen people who do need to get divorces.
Sometimes the child is better off.
So let's find out why people who are seven and eight years old are getting divorced.
Whatever makes you feel better.
Pain me as the villain if that makes you feel better.
Make everyone hate me if that makes you feel better.
This man conducted a six-year-long experiment being married to this woman and thinking that he could talk her into having children, even though she made it plain to him on the first date that that was never going to happen.
See, what they're hoping is that you love them so much that you will backtrack on your goals for your life.
But she said, I don't want to be a mom and I don't love you enough to change my mind about what I said.
They love the beautiful colors on that pretty bird.
That's why they want to cage it.
They want to see what you're willing to sacrifice in the name of loving them.
Will you give up your career for me?
Will you have kids even though you say you didn't want to?
Will you move cross-country even though you say you didn't want to?
I'm glad women are saying, oh no, no, I love you, but I love me more.
Yeah, well, that's how that is how you get divorced.
If you love you more, that will definitely lead to divorce.
And the other thing, of course, is that women never try to change men.
They always just like take men as they get them.
Here's the thing.
If you're like a girl, you think you want to marry her, ask her this.
Can she cook?
Will she have babies?
Does she feel like making a home for you?
Because that's what makes wives happy.
It's what will make you happy.
There are some people, there are some exceptions.
You're probably not one of them.
So find out first because they're not going to become something they weren't when you met them.
They're going to become more of what they are when you get to know them better.
All right.
So, you know, I have some sympathy with that person, but she shouldn't have gotten married.
She should have said no when she was asked if she would marry.
I'm really struggling knowing how to plan for my future for some context.
I left my marriage not quite one year ago.
This week will be my one-year divorce date.
Things aren't final, but since I left my marriage, I'm ex-Mormon.
I left my, you know, my church.
I deconstructed Christianity.
I deconstructed America.
I realized, you know, what was happening and woke up about what was happening in Palestine and everything in the beginning of 2024 and, you know, just started processing all this stuff.
And now I am, you know, I'm almost 26.
I am single.
I'm living in San Diego, kind of starting over fresh, self-employed.
And the future is so unknown.
I'm queer.
I don't know what's going to happen with LGBTQ, you know, cube rights.
I don't know what's going to happen with just, you know, people fighting back in general.
It just, the future feels really unknown right now.
And it feels really hard to know how to plan for my future financially, to know how to set myself up for any kind of success when I'm chronically ill.
The Future Feels Unknown 00:02:06
I have endometriosis, PCOS, and LR's download syndrome that affects me every single day.
I have chronic pain and just so much of the future feels so unknown.
All right.
So very neurotic girl.
Oh, first of all, tattoo.
Guys, red flag tattoo.
Watch for the death.
I'm sorry.
You know, an occasional small tattoo, but still, those big tattoos on your arm, I'm telling you.
That lady obviously caught the virus.
She caught the woke mind vires.
And it really is like that.
It's almost like a spiritual possession that comes into their mind.
She didn't just leave Mormonism.
She's suddenly gay.
She's suddenly, you know, worried about like, you know, she's deconstructed Christianity.
You know, that's dumb.
It's just dumb.
But it's an expression of being troubled, an expression of her already neurotic self.
She would have been much better off going to get some therapy from a conservative Mormon therapist, working it out that way.
Instead, she fell into the world.
She fell into the world.
The world is always waiting, always prowling like a lion out there to drag you away from the things that matter.
If she's going to get a tattoo, it should just be a tattoo that says, I'm going to be unhappy for the rest of my life.
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If you're 30 and still unmarried in this generation, you have successfully evaded your first divorce.
Congrats.
You're not behind.
You're undefeated.
While everyone else was writing vows, they apparently didn't really mean.
You were out here dodging red flags and going on very long vacations.
They thought they found the love of their life at 24.
And now they're posting inspirational quotes about healing and choosing peace at 29.
Meanwhile, I'm just here.
No joint custody, no walk or brunches with mutual friends, no dog I have to share, just lots of time on my hands to do whatever I want, healthy skin, and a Netflix password that's still mine.
Every married couple my age uses me as their single friend to vent to.
They tell me about their problems, their depression, their anxiety, basically doing nothing to convince me that marriage sounds like a good idea, but then they'll immediately end the conversation by asking me if I met anyone yet and when I'm going to get married.
This cognitive dissonance needs to be studied.
It's very strange.
We don't do this with anything else in life.
If you visit somebody in prison and they tell you the whole time how miserable they are, they usually don't end the visit by asking, hey, so when are you going to get in here?
You really got to get in here.
What are you waiting for?
You're missing out.
So I don't know.
You know, they call it fear of commitment.
I call it patience with a purpose.
If you're in your 30s, single, and still haven't lost half of your furniture yet, you're winning.
All right.
That was cute and clever.
And another guy who's going to be unhappy for the rest of his life.
Here's the thing.
I'm always very humble about this because I married the best woman on earth, right?
So it's like, you can't say, obviously, nobody else can do that because there's only one.
So I've been very happy.
But I have to say, too, that I see a lot of people who are married who do not put the energy into being married.
And, you know, people always say marriage is work.
Marriage is not work, but it's like everything.
It takes energy, right?
It's something you do.
It's not something that just happens to you and then it's over.
It's not like a sleigh ride where your horse is going downhill, you just keep going downhill.
It's something you have to do.
You have to be in love with your spouse.
You have to do things for your spouse.
These are things that feminism has destroyed in us because we think life is about ourselves.
And it is about yourself and it is about your spouse, but the two of you together are a third thing that is more important than either one of you.
And you have to pay attention to that.
And if you're complaining to your single friends about your spouse, then you're not putting the energy in to love your spouse because you love them when you married them, when they asked you to marry them, when you asked them to marry you, you love them.
Where did that go?
Where did the energy that you went into when you bought the ring or when you said, oh yes, I would love to marry you?
Where did that go?
You're spending it complaining.
You're spending it, you know, being negative about the thing, the person in your life.
You know, it's not work.
It's just something you do.
It is something that you have to be doing all the time, loving the person you married.
I am done sheltering my children from the actions or inactions of my co-parents.
My mom did a lot of work of covering up the pain of why my dad wasn't around when he was living other places.
Hey, dad, you're probably going to see this.
But she took a lot of the brunt of that for me, of saying, like, don't feel bad, or it's not a big deal, or blah, blah, blah.
Like kind of making those excuses and kicking the can down the road.
And I just felt angry at her and sad that he wasn't around.
I'm not doing that.
I'm not doing that.
If my co-parent doesn't decide that they want to use their rights as a parent to come visit, I'm letting my kids know.
And that is going to be really hard to hear, but I'm tired of them acting like little beeholes because their dad's not around.
It's not my fault.
He's an adult who can travel here.
So I don't know.
Maybe this can inspire somebody else, but I'm just not doing it.
I'm done.
Yeah.
So the word co-parent was an immediate giveaway.
Probably not married, probably did not make the commitment under God that they would be together, that there would be one flesh, that they would actually have roles in life.
Her role being a homemaker and a mother and his to actually make that possible for her and to lead them in a healthy and hopefully sacred life.
Obviously not doing any of that.
When you have been reduced to a co-parent, you're already playing with a mark deck.
You're already playing with loaded dice.
You're done.
And so these people are making mistakes at the very beginning, it seems to me.
They're making mistakes to think that they're going to change the person they marry, to think that they should be complaining about the person that they marry, to think that they can co-parent instead of be a father and a mom.
You know, we didn't invent these things to oppress people.
We invented them because that's part of the natural order of the world.
And there's time to be a mom and then to be something else later on.
But when you're a mom, you're a mom.
And when you're a dad, you're something else.
It's a different job.
And so these people have been told a lot of lies and they're living by those lies and they're paying the price for that.
One of the things I like about Gen Z is I meet a lot of conservative Gen Zers who don't buy into those lies.
And I think their videos are going to be very different because they're not going to make them.
Women don't really need men anymore, unfortunately.
And here are the reasons why.
In today's day and age, guys think they go to work, they come home, they play their video games, they watch their football games, they hang out on the couch playing with their phone, they go out with their friends, and that is their day.
What do women bring to the table?
They take care of the house, everything looks great, take care of the kids.
Hey, by the way, are we going to the parent-teacher conference?
No, mom's going, hey, did you schedule that doctor's appointment?
Mom's got it.
Guys, we've got to bring more to the table.
If you want to feel needed and wanted by women these days, do everything like they do.
Match their energy.
All right, bad advice, but not totally bad advice, not 100% bad advice.
Of course, you should be involved with your children's life.
You should go to school meetings as well.
There are things that mom can do while you are paying the bills, but these are things that you can also do and you should be thoroughly involved in that part.
Having children is a life task.
It is something that it's not something you don't just drop them off and there they are and you water them every now and again and they grow.
You want to be part of their lives and see their lives.
And by the way, just so you know, because I'm like old, you know, when you are older and your children are grown, they are like central joys in your life if you put in the energy to help them find their way.
You know what I mean?
I think that that's the thing.
Life is not just this moment.
It actually goes on and it can be very lonely and very sad if you've got no one to love as you get older.
Being a parent is hard work.
I don't think being married is hard work.
Being a parent is work, but it's joyful work.
It is the work of God.
It is the work that you were meant to do.
And the people who miss out on that because they think something is more important probably are not going to do as well as if they put in a little bit of time as part of your life.
All right, that's all I've got to say.
These people are too young.
They're not too young to get married.
They're too young to have broken out of a world of lies, an atmosphere of lies.
They're like underwater in lies.
And they've lived those lies.
And when you live those lies, this is what you reap in the end.
So get your mind right first and then get yourself a dame or a guy and have kids and be happy.
Boy, I can't get enough of that guy.
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