#971: October 2-3, 2024 Alex Jones falsely ties Tim Walz’s abortion debate to "missing" children (300,000 unaccompanied minors) and blames globalists for a Marburg virus scare in Germany, ignoring Rwanda’s actual outbreak. He dismisses caller skepticism about Hadley Duvall’s claims as "lies," promotes Kevin Sorbo’s debunked Hollywood conspiracy theories, and hypes James O’Keefe’s Tucker Carlson-backed film while mocking mainstream box office hits. The episode reveals Jones’s reliance on cherry-picked narratives to fuel paranoia, despite his hosts’ factual corrections, culminating in a bizarre detour to Melania Trump’s alleged disdain—underscoring his erratic, attention-grabbing style over substance. [Automatically generated summary]
I would say maybe the worst thing to do if you're feeling so unusual that you only have a reference point from your childhood is maybe go on air and tell everybody all about it because you don't know what's going to happen on account of having no reference point.
Francisco, Austin, Texas, Kansas City, Chicago, New York.
Think I'm joking?
Everything I say here is from news articles, okay?
So I can play in Northam, how they keep the baby alive and then harvest its organs.
That was his job.
That's what he did before he was a governor.
You want to see that?
So he lied about that.
He lied about Minnesota not having a housing crisis and that illegals don't aren't the main cause of housing shortages, and then inflation's the reason they're so expensive and property tax.
So that was a big lie.
I mean, it was just at a certain point, when you know someone's a complete liar, what is the point of even analyzing all of it?
You know, I was going to have some guests on today, but we've canceled those because I want to just be able to open the phones up throughout the full transmission.
And, you know, if Chase Geyser is really working hard back there, he has a great job.
If he wants to fire spaces up on Democrat debate disaster.
All Alex wants to do here on this show is just do a space so he can talk shit with some other people on Twitter about the debate and how Tim Walz is a demon.
That's much more fun and way easier than doing the job and covering the issues.
But I will say that I very much relate with Alex's feelings there when he says that it sometimes feels pointless to even care what someone says when you know they're a huge liar.
That is a defining struggle of my professional career.
Obviously, Alex is wrong about the abortion and housing points he's trying to accuse Walls of lying about, but it doesn't really matter for the intended audience here.
It's not really all that interesting to see Alex have this position because it's exactly what you'd expect.
But the one thing that I found to be a little bit odd is that he did have to admit that the moderators were not lying about one thing they said about Vance.
So this was a flub, and if you hear the larger context, it's very clear that what he meant to say was he was friends with people whose lives have been affected by school shootings.
It's Walls' fault for misspeaking, but it's embarrassing for Alex and Tucker to pretend they don't understand what he's saying.
I know we haven't been perfect on this front, but this is one of the reasons we don't talk a ton about various idiotic things Trump says at his rallies.
Some of the time, not all the time, some of the time, people post shorter clips of Trump that actually do make sense in context, and they present it as if there is no context.
Beyond that, nothing probably will ever top Ross Perot's VP choice, Admiral Stockdale's disastrous 1992 debate performance.
He introduced himself by saying, Who am I?
Why am I here?
He was being fun and self-effacing, but the coverage of it was a huge blow to the Perot campaign.
They never recovered from.
And what about Michael Dukakis, who famously said that he would not support the death penalty in the theoretical case of his wife being raped and killed?
Like, it was a principled answer, but man, that did not play well in 1988.
Margaret, the rules were that you got a fact-check.
And since you're fact-checking me, I think it's important to say what's actually going on.
So there's an application called the CBP OneApp, where you can go on as an illegal migrant, apply for asylum or apply for parole, and be granted legal status at the wave of a Kamala Harris open border wand.
That is not a person coming in, applying for a green card and waiting for 10 years.
So what Vance is saying is based on something real, but he's a lying, hate-mongering piece of shit all the same.
As Walls points out there, the laws that govern what Vance is talking about have been on the books forever.
And what Vance is really talking about is technological advancement.
Whereas before you might have had to file certain forms in person, there's now an app that can handle people seeking to get various services from the Office of Customs and Border Protection.
This isn't an app that just allows anyone immediate legal status.
It's just a scheduling app.
People use it to request appointments at one of eight CBP centers in three different states.
And it's only for people in Mexico trying to get an appointment at a point of entry.
Also, the app wasn't created by Harris or Biden's administrations.
It was launched during Trump's time in office.
This is all a load of shit, but it's important to understand why a narrative like this is important for folks like Alex and Vance.
They've tried to whip people into a hysterical frenzy targeting the Haitian population in Springfield, Ohio.
This has been done under the illusion that the problem they have with these Haitian people is that they're illegal immigrants.
But as it turns out, most of them are.
Most of them are there entirely legally.
So the whole if they were here legally, it would be fine facade is threatened by that piece of information.
They still have a problem because the being here legally thing was a fake problem that they were pretending to have for respectability's sake.
Their actual problem, inherent bigotry, is still there and it still needs to be rationalized.
So the new rationalization is that they aren't really legal residents.
They're exploiting a Harris loophole.
So even if the law says that they are legal residents, they're actually here illegally.
This is an attempt to save face on the fact that they were wrong, but also it's an attempt to move the football downfield.
This is an attempt to invalidate all people who come here and have legal status because even if they are residents legally, maybe they cheated the system.
How can you really tell?
This is about expanding.
I imagine eventually that is what they sit down to.
It's about expanding the group that is considered the other, the acceptable other out group, including people who are here legally because those people are also the targets of Trump's border agenda.
Like the whole people are here illegally or whatever is an illusion that they're using to make people more comfortable with what they're actually pushing for.
It's important to note that they've spent 30 years convincing idiotic press that that's the real issue that we should be talking about is how they would be fine if legal immigration weren't so easy.
We would love immigration.
Thank you, Press, for spending 30 years talking about that and only now just realizing that you're a waste of our time.
So one of the big things that Alex is very excited about is whereas Trump doesn't really talk about how there are 300,000 children missing who have come over the border, who are obviously being trafficked, right?
unidentified
I mean, that's so many traffic doesn't talk about that.
So you've got hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of thousands of these children that they know of that were in their hands that they turned loose, not to mention the ones they never made contact with, just like the 400 and something thousand criminals.
And the Border Patrol will tell you that most of them never even turn themselves in because they're criminals.
You don't even know how bad it is.
25 million is the number we know total that have come in, but over a million criminals is conservative.
So this is a real cornerstone of how Alex allows himself to pretend to be a good person while supporting horrible policies.
He argues that there are hundreds of thousands of children who have come across the border that the government promptly loses because they're just being brought here for human trafficking purposes and the government's complicit.
This is all bullshit, though.
Alex is referring to a popular right-wing talking point that the Biden administration has lost over 300,000 unaccompanied minors who crossed the border.
It's something that Vance said at the debate, and Alex is furious that Trump won't attack Harris Harder with.
However, the number is not in reference to lost children.
There were 448,820 unaccompanied children admitted to the United States between October 2018 and September 2023.
And the 300,000 stat is in reference to 291,000 of them never receiving a notice to appear in court for a hearing.
These people are not necessarily missing.
They've not been contacted for whatever reason.
Probably because there's a backlog of cases and bureaucracy moves slow.
There were, in the same report, 32,000 children who received notice to appear and then didn't go to court.
But it's important to recognize the context that the AP provides, which is that, quote, they only get a notice to appear when removal proceedings against them have begun.
And that probably explains most of the 291,000 who have never been contacted because those proceedings have never started.
And even the 32,000 that got contacted and didn't appear, there are issues of did you have the right address?
There's all kinds of things that those are not necessarily all missing children.
The entire premise that Alex is basing his argument on is a lie.
And that's not even taking into account that the numbers that this is all based on start in October 2018.
So it includes quite a bit of Trump's presidency.
Basically, it goes like this.
When unaccompanied minors arrive at the border, they're handed off from ICE to the Department of Health and Human Services, specifically the Office of Refugee Resettlement.
The ORR handles housing of the children while they try to place them with a family member or an approved sponsor.
While the children are being housed by the ORR, sometimes there are removal proceedings begun against them, which is handled by ICE.
ICE did not contact those 291,000 children because they didn't begin removal proceedings.
And in the 32,000 cases where they did and the children didn't appear in court, it's not necessarily because the children had disappeared.
It's just as likely that ICE was just not cooperating with other agencies and it sent notices to the wrong place.
From the Inspector General's report about this, quote, an HHS official we interviewed said despite the new process for increased coordination between ICE and HHS, ICE did not coordinate when unaccompanied children in the local area did not appear for court hearings.
HHS officials stated they would like to collaborate more with DHS locally to help unaccompanied children.
ICE is a government body based on enforcement, and they do deportations.
They don't know where these children are because it's not in their mandate to monitor them once they're handed over to HHS.
And because they cooperate insufficiently with HHS to get the information that they need in so many cases, you have numbers like this.
The lack of information on ICE's part has been transformed into hundreds of thousands of missing children, all part of an elaborate human smuggling operation that Kamala Harris is running, either to get rich or maybe to get votes or the devil or something.
I don't know.
Come up with your own explanation.
But here is the hidden game that's being played.
What's the solution to the problem if you're on Alex's side of the fence?
The problem is that these 300,000 kids are missing, which translates in the real world to them not having been contacted by ICE.
The solution is obviously for all these kids to be contacted by ICE, which means that removal proceedings would be opened for all of them.
This is the real goal: pushing for immediate deportation processes to be enacted for everyone who comes to the United States using pretend concern about human trafficking as an emotional justification.
And I mean, the luxury of it is that if you wanted that to happen, you would have to fund and speed up all of the abilities to do things at the border, which they don't want to do because by creating a backlog like this, you create situations like this where you can grandstand.
And then these will spiral out of control without you ever actually doing anything about it.
So Alex plays a little clip from Twitter here, and then he's trying to rationalize in his own head why Vance is talking more about these alleged missing children than Trump.
Trump's not doing enough.
unidentified
This is outrageous.
And people are thinking about who they're voting for.
You have complicit a president, Joe Biden, and Kamala Harris running for president who purposely and knowingly know the children are being sex trafficked in thousands and thousands.
Trump has absolutely talked about there being thousands of missing kids, but Alex knows that he's not quite extreme enough on the issue.
Trump wants to use it as a campaign issue, so he can't go quite as far as Alex without it backfiring.
So he just kind of dances around this.
But I think it's really funny that Alex is expecting the audience to believe that Trump is some kind of crusading champion against the literal devil, but he doesn't want to talk about missing children because it would bum people out too much.
He got shot at and then he stood up and yelled, fight, fight, fight.
So just to be clear, Alex is saying that the ends justified the means in the Iran-Contra scandal.
In the name of fighting communism, it's okay for government officials to sell weapons to Iran while they're under an embargo in order to raise money to fund anti-communist militant groups in Nicaragua.
I personally love the idea of a guy in charge of an airfield where they fucking sell murder weapons to a government that's under embargo and then sell cocaine and then do all of this stuff being like, whoa, I think I have a moral issue here.
I think it's time for me to step up and really this is, guys, guys, hey, listen.
Obviously, all of the murder that we do and facilitating all the horrible shit we facilitated.
So we've heard Alex talk about this stuff before, but I decided to include this clip because this version of his dad confronting him is a little different than the times he's told this story in the past.
This version is a bit more dramatized and includes threats of disowning and a lot of fake tears.
Alex's take on this whole thing is interesting, though, because I believe that he thinks that God can forgive him.
But it seems like the idea of forgiving himself is a foreign concept.
It's almost like instead of allowing himself to heal and make peace with his own decisions, he's created a situation where his only value is to be used by a deity in a series of painful trials to earn the redemption that he's supposed to already have.
So in Hamburg, a train platform was briefly closed out of an abundance of caution because someone got sick on the train.
Normally, this wouldn't happen if someone just got sick, but the person was a medical student who had just returned from Rwanda where he was providing medical care for people there.
One of the patients he'd seen while he was there had developed Marburg, so he was monitoring his health conditions closely.
This guy began to feel flu-type symptoms on the train, so he knew to take it seriously and reported it to authorities on scene.
The guy didn't end up experiencing the kind of symptoms you'd expect with Marburg, and he tested negative for the virus, as did his girlfriend.
So this was all a false alarm.
Even if it was a false alarm, the response was exactly what it should have been.
And it seems really heartening how it played out.
There was a strong, rapid response to the potential danger, but it didn't result in public hysteria.
If anything, this is a demonstration of a functioning public health response.
But I guess Alex can see through the bullshit and how it's secretly just a next time on type trailer for the globalist next silly virus plan.
Like, what details is he singling out that really makes him think that this was fake?
He claims a lot of things are staged, and he's pretty much always wrong, but I want to know what in that story he's actually basing that suspicion on.
What is it?
He seems to be responding to the idea that a man and his girlfriend got sick on a train, which seems like a very normal thing that could happen in real life.
This response to a couple getting sick on a train seems a bit severe, except that there were medical students who were recently in Rwanda, so they knew to take possible symptoms seriously and not just assume like it's motion sickness.
This doesn't seem suspicious if you have all the details.
So also, it's pretty clear that Alex hasn't read this story before he's going on air because he does that little aside where he points out that the borders are wide open.
He's trying to frame the story as an immigrant coming into Germany being the one carrying the possible virus because that plays into his other xenophobic narrative priorities.
But if he actually had the details in advance, you would know that this was not an immigrant.
And they're kind of bending over backwards to justify their desire to not have a black president.
In that pursuit, they are essentially admitting that the Jamaican Constitution supersedes the American one if they want it to in a particular situation.
Yeah, yeah, Constitution of Jamaica offers citizenship to people who were born to parents who are citizens regardless of where they're born.
Great.
Harris's mom was born in India, and their Constitution confers citizenship to people whose parents were born there, too.
Who gives a shit?
Having these citizenships offered to you and actually being a citizen of those countries are two entirely different things.
And this isn't a sincere complaint that the caller or Alex is expressing.
Like, he's gone so far out of his way to find some reason to hate this woman that isn't just the color of her skin, that he wound up at the Constitution of Jamaica.
Sure, that would be reasonable to think that, but that's crazy.
He's over here defending women's rights, and yet he takes this little girl, just says a name where she lives, that she had an abortion, she was raped, all this stuff.
This is definitely who Alex and this call are talking about.
And Alex has just committed possible defamation against her by claiming that he and Owen looked into her story and found that it was not true.
I'm not going to get into the specifics here, but what Alex is doing is fucking disgusting.
There's another woman that Walls used the name of during this part of the debate, which was Amanda Zorowski, who's a woman from Texas who was denied an abortion after her water broke at 18 weeks.
She ended up having a bunch of life-threatening complications and ended up with damage to her fallopian tubes.
She's also a public figure and the name plaintiff in a lawsuit against the state of Texas.
So it's not criminal to reference her name.
These people are fucking assholes.
At least this caller seems to be coming from a place of misplaced concern.
Because at least he, in theory, doesn't want this person's name who has gone through this to be made public.
Sure.
But she's an advocate.
She's a public person.
And what Alex is doing is saying, I looked into it.
Alex has found someone posting on social media about this patent application from 2003 that proposes a machine that can control hurricanes and tornadoes.
But these machines were never made and everyone agrees they wouldn't work.
You can file a patent for whatever you want.
It does not mean that you can make that thing or if it's even real.
For instance, in 2006, a guy named Alexander Belonkin filed a patent for the quote method of recording and saving of human souls for human immortality and installation for it.
When I'm elected president, platforms that promote free speech, truth, and resilience to the new world order, like thealexjonesstore.com, will be banned.
Sites that profit off dangerous truths are a threat to our democracy.
Shirts sold at the alexjonstore.com, like the Infowars Limited Edition fundraiser t-shirt, will no longer be tolerated.
You know, and as much as I understand the eventual coming death of reality at the hands of AI deepfakes and yada yada yada and all that stuff, that death is probably more damaging at this point in time to his psyche because when we ask the question, like, does he know what he's lying about?
I mean, at the end of the day, you can't be using AI to program fake voice versions of your enemy, even if they are not human, because that is against the human spirit.
It should be.
You can't use the devil's tools to defeat the devil.
So this big storm races up the west coast of Florida, goes over the panhandle, and then just dumps.
And we've shown you that track.
Everybody knows what happened.
And there are tens of millions still without power.
There are rural areas totally smashed, mudslides, roads blocked, hundreds of hundreds of dead.
They're thinking they might go into the much higher because people can't even get into these areas.
Citizens and their pickup trucks try to get in, and FEMA is in control and ordering local fire departments, who should disregard it, many are, to not let them in.
Meanwhile, they're catching illegal aliens everywhere, robbing the daylights out of everybody and looting.
They haven't arrested that I've seen any American citizens doing it.
I'll give you a little idea of what we're talking about here.
But regardless, there is a horribly anemic response.
They've waited over a week to do anything.
And this is just perfect timing where this hurricane went and what happened.
And the federal government since 1967, declassified 16 years ago, can create hurricanes, steer hurricanes, make them stronger, make them weaker.
A lot of meteorologists and others have looked at the radar path and scans of the storm and say it has all the signs of being heavily manipulated.
So the general conspiracy that Alex is putting forth is that the globalists caused this hurricane in order to cause a bunch of damage, which would then make it impossible for these people to vote in rural areas that were more likely to vote for Trump.
They used a weather weapon to steal the election, basically.
I would give anything for weather weapons to be real right now.
Because, I mean, you know, it's like there's a certain amount of the COVID stuff where it's like, if people are in control of it, you know, there's something comforting about, sure, there's evil people killing everybody, but that somebody's in control.
The idea that these hurricanes are just going to increase in frequency and power and forever and unpredictability forever at no one's control at complete random because of a consequence of the shit that we have done.
And it doesn't matter if it's in a place where you thought, oh, there's no way a hurricane, if you planned ahead for a hurricane hitting you by living in the middle of fucking Death Valley, God knows there might be a goddamn hurricane.
That illusion is maintained when there's the villain who's doing everything.
Also, Alex's narrative about only immigrants looting is just an expression of his white nationalist leanings.
He saw a story about eight migrant workers who got arrested for looting and then just decided those were the only arrests because those are the only stories that all the racist accounts he follows on Twitter were posting about.
Surely if there were other cases, these racist Twitter accounts would post about them too.
A man in Asheville was arrested for trying to loot a store and attempted to flee on a stolen motorcycle.
At least 11 people were arrested for looting various businesses in Augusta, Georgia.
None of this is stuff that Alex is even touching on.
He tells the story that he wants to tell, which is a story that demonized migrants.
All of his information comes from dipshit social media accounts that tell the same story back to him, which he then uses as the basis for his reporting.
It's circular, self-reinforcing bigotry, and it's pretty clear.
He, of course, has been a top TV actor, movie star, you name it.
And since then, had all these huge hit Christian films, you name it.
He's got SorboStudios.com.
Been a fan of him since I was a teenager, watching him on Hercules.
And he's had a lot of courage, and he's out there constantly.
You see him all the time on mainstream media, the alternative media that's now bigger than the old mainstream media, standing up for life, standing up for the unborn, standing up for God.
And I just really am glad to be able to get him on in his busy schedule.
He came out a few days ago, and it's up on Infowars.com, this article, Hercules Actor.
I left Hollywood because they are Pedo's.
Now, I was already wanting to get him on, and I've got some of the other actors coming on soon from the incredible movie, especially if you were alive back then.
The nostalgia is amazing.
It's so accurate as well.
Reagan.
That, of course, has got Dennis Quaid and so many other people in it, including Kevin Sorbo, who plays his pastor and who helped put Reagan on his life path, according to Reagan.
So an amazing film.
I saw that my parents brought tears to their eyes as we all lived through that and experienced it.
I guess for younger people, they see it and it doesn't quite click as well.
But if you want to know what it was like with time capsule and really what's affecting how we live today, you see the movie Reagan.
Gradually, he shifted into appearing in Christian movies, many of them produced by Pureflix, because quality acting is not needed in that genre.
He's found a nice new audience there and has progressively moved more towards the fringe of the right wing, which I guess now means that he's trying to exploit Diddy's arrest as an advertising opportunity for this new Reagan movie, which is cool stuff all around.
Her dad's a great guy, obviously in the Reagan movie, but I'm not trying to clapp her, but they're definitely polar opposites when it comes to John Voigt's cool.
So Sorbo's laughing about people getting mad at his post because this is all a joke to him, and he's thrilled to get attention.
I would suggest that possibly the people that are mad at him for his behavior might be trying to express, this isn't about you, Kevin.
Stop trying to make the news about Diddy's victims about you, Kevin.
You're just a bad actor who found a new niche, Kevin.
Go fuck yourself.
Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly split up earlier this year, so this is pretty old news.
This story that he's talking about traces back to a 2022 interview where she said that the two drank a drop of each other's blood as part of their engagement ceremony.
She likened it to becoming blood brothers, and that makes enough sense to me.
I think we can say that this is a non-issue, or maybe they're secretly vampires.
But if these references are all that you have to go on with for the widespread blood drinking problem in Hollywood, you have this Megan Fox story, and then you have to go back to the late 90s for Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton, and that story wasn't even about them drinking blood.
Okay, so you're kind of just talking shit about vampires and stuff and all of these very serious issues and kind of maybe rumor and innuendo of stuff you know nothing about.
You have no information to provide.
And you really left because no one wanted to fucking hire your terrible acting ass and you don't like taxes and traffic.
So I think the proof here is that Hollywood has collapsed and faith-based movies are taking over because people just can't handle this agenda of wokeness.
$3 million movie that opened number two per screen average against Thor Ragnarok, a $300 million movie.
I get a call from Netflix after opening weekend, and they say, hey, we know you have a foot in this family faith world.
We want to open an inspirational division here at Netflix.
I had four meetings with them over the next couple months.
This is back in 2018.
And with each meeting, I could tell this was maybe this was just lip service that their ideology is so screwed up.
And so there's 80 million homes that want the kind of movies that I'm doing and what the Irwin brothers are doing and what the Kendrick brothers are doing.
There's 80 million homes out there, yet they just avoid it for whatever reasons.
And I knew half the people in those rooms that I was meeting.
I was met like a dozen people from Netflix.
I could tell half of them agreed with me, but they're afraid.
You know, the gays are out of the closet in Hollywood.
So I'm guessing that Netflix would love to try and tap into profiting off the audience Sorbo has, but honestly, you have to ask yourself if that's an audience worth chasing.
Sure, maybe you can make some money off a shitty movie with good messages division, but if you put out a movie with a black female lead, are these people going to try and boycott you over being too woke?
It's not a great market to try to sustain unless you're willing to cater to them entirely, which is why working with someone like Sorbo on something like this would probably seem interesting to explore, but you would think better of it.
Yeah, Netflix wants to start a quote-unquote inspirational division, which a Christian like Kevin Sorbo should be against just as a commercialization of their bullshit entirely.
But I think what he's missing is that if you want to make the real money, you have to start a Birth of a Nation division, essentially, where you just make fucking Nazi propaganda.
Let There Be Light and its best performance came in ninth in per theater box office.
And if you just look at the next week when Thor came out, because he mentioned Thor, it drops to 16th place behind Ladybird, Thor, and the classic A Bad Mom's Christmas, starring Catherine Hahn and potential future RFK Jr. ex-wife Cheryl Hines.
Just on a general principle, I don't think we should listen to actors when they talk.
Just because if your job is to pretend to be something else, you got to really have a strong handle on who you are before you should be talking as yourself.
I guess that Tucker's hiring O'Keeffe now, which that seems like a good fit.
He ran Project Veritas into the ground, and if you provide the kind of content that his audience wants, it doesn't really matter how clear of a fraud you are.
And Tucker understands how to cater to that market.
He gets that.
This is a perfect partnership from how cravenly opportunistic both of these guys are to how they're both dinosaurs who were mentored by Andrew Breitbart.
I watched the trailer for this movie, and it looks like sensationalist bullshit, which is no surprise.
The only thing that is a surprise is that O'Keeffe is doing a border stunt again.
He already dressed up as Osama bin Laden and crossed the Rio Grande River to demonstrate how anyone can cross the border, and that was in 2014.
He's such a hack.
He's just rehashing his own shit from like a decade ago and over-dramatizing it.
unidentified
Everything else has kind of been shitty since then, so try running it back.
Pretending to be targeted is literally James's business model.
If he didn't pretend that he was being persecuted by the system, he'd have no way to make money.
I would argue that James O'Keefe is actually a living embodiment of how there is no systemic persecution of these right-wing shitheads because he has very little talent and negative charisma, and yet he has zero shame, and he's willing to do just about anything for a publicity stunt.
So he's been constantly rich and a famous figure for like 15 years.
Just as a little reminder, according to Business Insider, things started to fall apart at Veritas after James put out a parody music video and the board of directors sent out a memo saying, quote, they were concerned about how James O'Keefe spent company resources, including personnel and money, to indulge his musical theater aspirations.
So I was listening to this, and I'm like, okay, Alex Jones, noted conspiracy seer-through guy, is complaining about the view and who does or doesn't like Christmas enough and whether Melania loves her husband.