#856: Live In London (Night 1)
In this installment, Dan and Jordan podcast live from the Amersham Arms in London. Tune in to learn about the Tootsie Pop owl, the difference between the mind and brain, and much more.
Oct. 6, 2023 - Knowledge Fight
01:09:08
| 
| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
| We're already training them with constant brainwashing and cars to worship Britannia and hate our ancestral enemies, the Frenchies. | ||
| Oh, the French! | ||
| Yes, ladies and gentlemen, we are back live. | ||
| And now, for all of you Anglophiles out there, Prepare for the pain. | ||
| The funny thing is we're trying to save the dumbed-down, brutish people. | ||
| They are the attack dogs of the people that are soft-killing them. | ||
| And nothing against England. | ||
| I mean, I've got a lot of English in a lot of myself. | ||
| And one of my ancestors, Gresham, invented the stock exchange on record. | ||
| And the King of England is the sworn enemy of humanity. | ||
| He couldn't stand the Queen of England. | ||
| That's in mainline history books. | ||
| Because she was a nymphomaniac. | ||
| 20 times a day. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, you didn't know that Queen Angle's husband was a Nazi? | |
| You didn't know his cousin that started the Bilderberg replace? | ||
| If you don't wake up and say no, you deserve to die. | ||
| And again, folks, I've got extensive British lineage. | ||
| So did George Washington, and he absolutely defeated the Transylvanian king. | ||
|
unidentified
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They're not British, they're not Scottish, they're not Irish, they're not Gaelic, they're not Viking. | |
| Prince Charles is the heir of Mount Dracula. | ||
| The Alta Kling doesn't run anything, folks. | ||
| She runs that whole country. | ||
|
unidentified
|
She shuts down roads in England every day, randomly, to exercise her power. | |
| You don't have a snotty... | ||
|
unidentified
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Shut up! | |
| Do you hear that I have a snark nose? | ||
| I am Piers Morgan, my dear boy. | ||
| Go ahead, then. | ||
|
unidentified
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I have greens with my snook, my proboscis while I talk to you. | |
| I'm sorry, go ahead. | ||
| Go ahead. | ||
| The show is called 8 Out of 10 Cats, and this is how society is turning into a tyranny. | ||
| Everything is... | ||
| The Queen of England has now joined with the United States and the West. | ||
| And so the Transylvania Queen knows which way the wind is blowing and can see that Trump and America are winning. | ||
| Now she's coming in like the Deuce X. The hero that comes in at the last moment when the main hero is going to lose. | ||
| Queen Elizabeth with this action has now become a Han Solo of Deuce X at the moment. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Live from the UK, it's Knowledge White. | |
| Uh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Andy and | ||
|
unidentified
|
James Andy and James Andy and James Andy and James Andy and James Andy and James I love your work Knowledge fight Knowledge fight.com Knowledge fight.com I love you Everybody And Hello London I'm | |
| Dan We're a couple of dudes who like to go all around the UK very sleepily and miss my cat Celine dearly and talk a little bit about Alex Jones. | ||
| Oh, indeed we are, dude. | ||
| Jordan. | ||
| Jordan. | ||
| Quick question for you. | ||
| What's up? | ||
| What's your bright spot today, buddy? | ||
| I might have dual bright spots. | ||
| Dual bright spots? | ||
| I think the first one is how panicked I was sitting backstage while my playlist played. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| I could not stop telling Jordan, like, I don't know if this is the right Avril Lavigne song. | ||
| I feel like being a teen woman is not going well for me right now. | ||
| I swear it's the most judged I ever feel is when I put on a song. | ||
| So we made it through. | ||
| But my real bright spot is I would say lodging in the UK. | ||
| Is that you alone? | ||
| Nothing but great times, I will say. | ||
| Great times. | ||
| Wonderful trip, but hotels here... | ||
| Don't know how to do it. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| They just don't. | ||
| It's not your fault. | ||
| I assume it's like historical. | ||
| Your country is a million years old, so assumably, you're like, we don't have to be hospitable to anybody. | ||
| We conquered India, right? | ||
| Like, it's fine. | ||
| Glasgow wasn't too bad as a hotel situation. | ||
| But then we show up in Manchester, and... | ||
| We're put into a hotel. | ||
| That's how you would describe it, too. | ||
| We were put into a hotel. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| I'm up on the 12th floor. | ||
| I got no Wi-Fi. | ||
| And everything is not cool because I need Wi-Fi to do some work and stuff. | ||
| It's kind of important. | ||
| And so Jordan, as the wonderful tour manager that he is, he pulled some strings and got me moved to a lower floor where theoretically there would be Wi-Fi. | ||
| He talked to the front desk and they said, the lowest we can go is the 10th floor. | ||
| The 10th floor? | ||
| The lowest we can go is the 10th floor? | ||
| That's where there's openings. | ||
| I mean, that's two floors at least. | ||
| That's fine. | ||
| What is that, 12 feet? | ||
| At least. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Six foot floors. | ||
| I don't know how tall I am. | ||
| We didn't mention that. | ||
| That's the real bad part about the hotel. | ||
| Six foot floors. | ||
| So I talk to the person at the front desk and exchange my keys, and I end up on the seventh floor, which is mysterious because that's lower than the tenth. | ||
| By the way, before he wound up on the seventh floor, the last words I said to the front desk was, please take care of Dan. | ||
| Now continue. | ||
| So I get a room on the seventh floor. | ||
| Get in there. | ||
| Still no Wi-Fi. | ||
| Great. | ||
| Also notice that there are exposed roof tiles that are really scary. | ||
| And I poke my head into the bathroom and there's drag marks of something. | ||
| And I'm like, this is a murder room. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It is. | |
| It did feel like if I were to grab two ankles and drag a body, those are the little marks that would be left behind. | ||
| Yeah, especially, I mean, it wasn't red, so it's like, especially if you really tried to clean it. | ||
| Getting the wrong ammonia, so it just turned... | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah, I gotcha. | ||
| I'm like, I'm not staying in this room. | ||
| Fuck this. | ||
| And so I go back down, and they put me back on the 12th floor. | ||
| But as I'm talking to the person, they're like, how did you get in that room? | ||
| I don't think people are supposed to be in there. | ||
| I'm like, that's a fucking murder room. | ||
| Yeah, because there was a murder in that room! | ||
| Yes, exactly. | ||
| They're still investigating that room! | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| I tampered. | ||
| I poked the ceiling tile. | ||
| I tampled your evidence. | ||
| You're a suspect. | ||
| You left DNA behind me. | ||
| So, get up to the 12th floor. | ||
| Still no Wi-Fi. | ||
| We make it good. | ||
| Then we show up here in London. | ||
| I'm in a hotel. | ||
| My bathroom has a sewage leak. | ||
| So I have to use Jordan's shower. | ||
| Yep, that's true. | ||
| Anyway, I want to get back to my cat. | ||
| It'll be worse now. | ||
| But everything else is wonderful. | ||
| It is just the hotels. | ||
| Everybody is wonderful. | ||
| Anyway, Jordan, I'm sorry. | ||
| I monopolized time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no, no. | |
| Everything's great except for the parts that we are not doing right now. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| My great spot, Dan, is that I can see. | ||
| Whoa! | ||
| I can see! | ||
| Look at my eyes. | ||
| I'm not wearing glasses right now because I left them on the train. | ||
| So... | ||
| Yesterday, I went to multiple optometrists to be like, hey, listen, I get you have laws. | ||
| Fine. | ||
| I'm not from here. | ||
| Let's forget about them. | ||
| Just give me two pairs of contacts. | ||
| That's all I need to get through two days. | ||
| And they're like, we have laws. | ||
| And I'm like, I get that. | ||
| I started with we have laws. | ||
| I opened with that. | ||
| Yeah, you were agreeing with that from the jump. | ||
| Totally, totally. | ||
| But let's ignore them. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| So this all happens, and after an almost excessive amount of badgering and me being this loud, they finally agreed to give me an eight-minute eye test. | ||
| Just to get laws out of the way. | ||
| And then they gave me exactly what I asked for. | ||
| And I couldn't, I couldn't just, because at the end of it, here's what I was thinking. | ||
| What I was thinking was like, once they give me the merchandise, Then I can say whatever I want to say. | ||
| And I chose against it. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| Polite. | ||
| You kept yourself together? | ||
| I did. | ||
| How long were you yelling at them? | ||
| Was it more than the eight minute eye test? | ||
| No, it was way more than the eight minute eye test. | ||
| It was a good half hour because I kept getting different answers. | ||
| Like, oh, we don't have an appointment until tomorrow. | ||
| And then it's like, let's talk a little bit more. | ||
| And they're like, ah, we don't have an appointment until like six o 'clock tonight. | ||
| And I'm like, you guys close at six o 'clock tonight. | ||
| They're like, we know. | ||
| And then eventually, after just talking, they're like, fuck it. | ||
| Come back in an hour. | ||
| The guy's available. | ||
| He'll poke your eyes with the... | ||
| And then that'll be it. | ||
| He's spitting your eye? | ||
| No. | ||
| No, when you get the eye test, everybody knows the part where it goes... | ||
| Like that. | ||
| I got that, and then they gave me contact. | ||
| You know, the fact that there is an eight-minute eye test really calls into question how long those eye tests need to be. | ||
| Sure does. | ||
| I feel like you have a new campaign. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bring this bullshit down! | |
| Listen, I'm against the monarchy, but first we've got to deal with eye tests. | ||
| Okay? | ||
| They're fucking with us, it's a charade. | ||
| That's the idea. | ||
| So folks, we have a show here to do. | ||
| Oh, we do? | ||
| Yeah, and so we are going to be talking about today, Jordan, October 30th, 2013. | ||
| Alright. | ||
| That's Halloween, right? | ||
| Day before. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| October has 31 days? | ||
| You bet. | ||
| Okay, hold on. | ||
| Do you remember the rhyme? | ||
| No, you do the hand thing, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hmm? | |
| Knuckles? | ||
| I don't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't. | |
| I certainly don't. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| My very easy... | ||
| Please excuse my dear Aunt Sally. | ||
| Yeah, no, I thought I was going with the planets, but okay, that's fine. | ||
| I don't know how many... | ||
| I'm always surprised by how many days there are in a month. | ||
| Just let it ride. | ||
| I know one of them for sure. | ||
| Every four years, I'm off. | ||
| And then October I know for sure because it's the candy holiday. | ||
| That's true. | ||
| You love candy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And you love putting razor blades in other people's candy. | |
| What was that weird sound I made? | ||
| As if I was lusting for candy right now. | ||
| I kind of am. | ||
| Get this man a Haribo! | ||
| I have enjoyed, you know, everything that's bad about the hotels has been made up for by the wonderful candy selection. | ||
| Yeah, it hasn't hurt. | ||
| Yeah, it's great. | ||
| So October 30th, 2013. | ||
| No idea why I would choose that day? | ||
| Um, no. | ||
| Okay, so when I was planning out these shows, one of the things that was in my mind was that there's gonna be, you know, we're gonna be in the UK and that's where so much great music comes from. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| That's the sound that molded eras so often from here to the point where, you know, to pick out a best example, you'd have a really hard time. | ||
| So as I was poking around, I realized that today, when we're doing the show, September 26th is the anniversary of the release of Abbey Road, arguably the Beatles' best record. | ||
| No response. | ||
| You know what's fun about that? | ||
| I said arguably. | ||
| I was going to say, you started with arguably and everybody agreed to argue. | ||
| This is Dan Stile playing it safe. | ||
| So one of the best albums by one of history's most important bands came out on the day that we're doing a live show in London. | ||
| Yeah, almost too perfect. | ||
| It is. | ||
| Yep, it is too perfect. | ||
| And it felt false for me as a person because I kind of like the Beatles, but as a kid I wasn't allowed to listen to music that my parents were construed as being inspired by drugs. | ||
| I was hit with the switch and not allowed to listen to the Beatles. | ||
| I gained appreciation for the Beatles catalog through Beatles Rock Band. | ||
| And I'll probably never live down the moment when me and my buddies Nicky Gifts and Swearingen were playing a few songs and Yesterday came on and I recognized that song but I had no idea it was by the Beatles. | ||
| My dad let me listen to that but he kept the little secret that it was the Beatles from me. | ||
| That is one of the weirder things I've ever heard. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Anyway, I couldn't in good conscience do an episode where I pretended to love the Beatles. | ||
| If I were going to talk about British music, it needed to be something I truly loved. | ||
| And as far as I'm concerned, there's only two options. | ||
| Avril Lavigne. | ||
| No, she's from Canada. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sorry. | |
| Commonwealth country. | ||
| It's basically the same thing. | ||
| The first option, Phil Collins. | ||
| He's had a career full of hits, both solo and with Genesis. | ||
|
unidentified
|
True. | |
| But what really put him over the top is he did that cover of Home with Bone Thugs and Harmony. | ||
| Was that it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| There is nothing cooler than seeing old man Phil Collins in a music video nodding along as Lazy Bone raps. | ||
| That puts him deep into the consideration. | ||
| See, I always felt like his lasting legacy will just be... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| That's it. | ||
| Just doing that at a bar. | ||
| Whenever we've forgotten all music, that will be the break that ends it. | ||
| Like at the end of time, as everything is crushed down into a white hole. | ||
| Hey man, you know. | ||
| Yeah, that's physics. | ||
| And that'll be what plays. | ||
| As the earth explodes, it's just that drum beat. | ||
| And it's Phil Collins' fault. | ||
| You know that song's about him watching someone watch someone drown. | ||
| Bah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah. | |
| Thanks. | ||
| So anyway, Phil Collins is not the winner here. | ||
| No one should be surprised that the winner is the Spice Girls. | ||
| The best musical act this fine country has ever produced. | ||
| And guess what? | ||
| September 26th is also the anniversary of the release of what might be their most iconic single, Say You'll Be There. | ||
| Certainly iconic in terms of the awakening of my sexuality as a young boy. | ||
| But look, here's the thing. | ||
| Alex has never had a good show on September 26th. | ||
| I listened to all of them. | ||
| They're all shit. | ||
| It was like the universe was playing a prank on me. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And so I decided I would go Spice Girl by Spice Girl. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I would go Spice Girl by Spice Girl. | |
| One at a time! | ||
| Find their birthday. | ||
| Each of their Achilles tendons, shall we... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wait. | |
| So who's your favorite Spice Girl, Jordan? | ||
| I swear to you, I've never listened to a Spice Girl song on purpose. | ||
| You're the music guy, and you've never listened to the Spice Girls. | ||
| I just didn't do it, you know? | ||
| So I know... | ||
| I really feel uncomfortable that I... | ||
| Because I don't know if this is true, right? | ||
| Is there one called Scary Spice? | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| Ginger, baby, scary, sporty, posh. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Can I ask you a quick question? | |
| Yes. | ||
| Which of them is non-white? | ||
| Scary. | ||
| Look, you're the one making a face. | ||
| Maybe I didn't want to listen to the Spice Girls. | ||
| Just throwing that out there! | ||
| Alright, so you don't have a favorite Spice Girls. | ||
| I do! | ||
| My favorite was Sporty. | ||
| Because she was the one who didn't really get solo singing parts, but would just yell a bit. | ||
| I always felt a strong kinship to the one who was like, I don't be there! | ||
| Yeah, alright. | ||
| Anyway, Sporty Spice was born on January 12th. | ||
| And guess what? | ||
| Alex has never done a good show on January 12th. | ||
| Just before we go any further, Dan told me recently that he listened to over 60 episodes that he did not use for this particular night. | ||
| And now we're finding out why. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So we've got roughly 20 attributed to the Beatles. | |
| We've got 20 attributed to Sporty Spice. | ||
| Where are we going? | ||
| So then I kind of turned against the Spice Girls while prepping for this. | ||
| Because Scary is the only non-white Spice Girl, and that's kind of fucked up. | ||
| Well, sure, I'll say it's that. | ||
| After listening to a ton of January 12th episodes of Alex's show and struggling to understand some of the Spice Girls' more problematic lyrics that don't age well, Spice Up Your Life, in particular, is a little dicey. | ||
| I decided to say fuck it and do the thing that I did not want to do, which was be the guy from the U.S. who loves talking about Oasis. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| Sorry. | ||
| I was just the right age when What's the Story Morning Glory came out, and I still get emotional when I hear Don't Look Back in Anger. | ||
| All right? | ||
| Fine. | ||
| That and Wonderwall were basically like an unfair one-two punch for a 12-year-old to hear. | ||
| Plus, the nonsense lyrics of Champagne Supernova, that was better than whatever the Spice Girls were doing in, again, Spice Up Your Life. | ||
| Problematic. | ||
| Don't revisit it. | ||
| Anyway, I lost track of those dudes from Oasis around 1998, but I'm sure nothing eventful has happened for them in their lives. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I think they just were preserved in amber from that time. | |
| There'll be a Jurassic Park about them. | ||
| So regardless of how much I wish this wasn't what I was doing, we're celebrating the anniversary of the release of Wonderwall. | ||
| So that was October 30th. | ||
| I think it's funny that I'm the music guy and I have to celebrate the 30th anniversary voice. | ||
| It's not the 30th anniversary. | ||
| Or whatever it is. | ||
| Yeah, but October 30th. | ||
| So anyway, I thought I would do something a little bit fun, which is give you all a taste of the only fun thing that I found in listening to all of those episodes. | ||
| And here is that. | ||
| Or not. | ||
| Uh-oh. | ||
| Okay, here we go. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Welcome back. | |
| Thank you so much for joining us. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I've passed a long way. | |
| I love stopping in the churches. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| What a perfect moment. | ||
| Love stopping at the churches. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Somehow that's even menacing. | |
| So we're going to get into this October 30th episode, but beyond just that little fun taste from an episode that I have no idea when that was from, here is an out of context drop from today's show. | ||
| And you think if you come up to them and curl up next to them that the starving ravenous wolves are going to give you kissy time. | ||
| They're not going to give you kissy time. | ||
| You've been warned. | ||
| I don't understand quite the need for a warning about wolves not giving you kissy time. | ||
| Ravenous wolves. | ||
| They're hungry. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| So you go into a wolf's den. | ||
| Who's going into a wolf's den expecting kissy time? | ||
| Me? | ||
| I love wolves. | ||
| No, I don't like wolves. | ||
| I was going to try and play that out. | ||
| What does kissy time with a wolf even mean? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| You know how you snuggle with your dogs? | ||
| They're basically wolves. | ||
| Like, not on the mouth. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| You're missing out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| Don't people kiss their dogs on the mouth? | ||
| Isn't that like a stand-up bit? | ||
| People are like, why are you white people kissing dogs on the mouth? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I feel like I've heard that before. | |
| Right? | ||
| I've heard that before. | ||
| I've not seen Def Jam comedy in quite a while. | ||
| Missing out. | ||
| But now I'm kind of wishing I revisited it. | ||
| So we are going to start here where Alex starts off where he plans on this episode to get to calls. | ||
| We're going to take calls. | ||
| We're going to be real serious. | ||
| I like the foreshadowing. | ||
| I do feel like everyone in this room knows we're not really going to get to calls. | ||
| He plans to do something. | ||
| It's not going to happen. | ||
| Here's where we go. | ||
| Unbelievably jam-packed broadcast day lined up for us here at 11 a.m. Central Standard Time. | ||
| A lot of stations carry us live. | ||
| Others air us at different times around the country. | ||
| And there's folks listening on shortwave and satellite and Internet all over the world. | ||
| I want to welcome you to the worldwide transmission. | ||
| And I really realize... | ||
| I've tried this about a hundred times and failed every time, but I think today is going to be the day that I succeed. | ||
| 101! | ||
| Everybody pretty much knows what a lot of the big news is. | ||
| There is some breaking news we're going to be getting to, but I'm going to just open the phones up to first-time callers. | ||
| I'm going to go to your phone call, and I'm going to give the person one minute, and then I'm going to move to the next person. | ||
| I've never actually been able to do this. | ||
| Back 10, 15 years ago, I could do talk radio and take 50 phone calls an hour in 45 minutes of airtime. | ||
| I just cannot get out of the rut. | ||
| I'm in of just covering news and ranting and pontificating, which is incredibly popular and I think informative to a certain extent, but I'm still very hungry. | ||
| He's hungry! | ||
| He's hungry! | ||
| He's hungry for those calls. | ||
| Chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp. | ||
| Take a bite out of him. | ||
| I don't understand what any of his callers could say in one minute. | ||
| All of them... | ||
| Hey, Alex, let's suck. | ||
| Gotta go. | ||
| Baba Booey. | ||
| No, they all start with, like, Alex, I have a question for you. | ||
| First off... | ||
| I need to tell you about how the Jews are... | ||
| And you're like, now we gotta click, click! | ||
| The phenomenon of a minute-long Alex Jones phone call is two seconds for the caller and 58 for Alex. | ||
| So that's really the problem. | ||
| And the problem is that people love his rants too much, man. | ||
| They're too good. | ||
| I like how he complains about stuff that is entirely under his control. | ||
| But there is some responsibility. | ||
| He's taking some responsibility for it. | ||
| I can never do this. | ||
| I constantly say I'm gonna do this. | ||
| I do appreciate a man who consistently refuses to change anything. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| While at the same time being like, hey, I should really do that. | ||
| I should, but I gotta give the people what they want, which is me ranting. | ||
| I'm thinking this heroin addiction, not gonna do it for me long term. | ||
| But the people love it. | ||
| The people love it whenever I'm high on heroin. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Gotta give the people what they want, which is a needle sticking out of your arm. | ||
|
unidentified
|
As usual. | |
| So, there are a lot of advertisement mascots of the times of yore. | ||
| Old time advertisement mascots. | ||
| If you had to choose one that you think Alex would compare himself to, who do you think it would be? | ||
| I mean Kool-Aid Man, for sure. | ||
| Kool-Aid Man? | ||
| Barging through the walls? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh yeah! | |
| Do that again, but then say, let me tell you about the Bilderberg group. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The Bilderberg group! | |
| Trilateral commission is also in there, but I keep forgetting about them. | ||
| I like that. | ||
| That would be a long thing for the Kool-Aid man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What if his preamble was a great deal longer than, oh yeah. | |
| He starts before he breaks through the wall. | ||
| Beware, everyone! | ||
| I'm going to be breaking through this wall. | ||
| I hope there are no innocent bystanders. | ||
| No, that's not it. | ||
| So here we go. | ||
| And many of you have heard this probably a hundred times the last ten years. | ||
| Heard me give this speech and I'm going to take your calls and it's kind of like licking to the center of a Tootsie Roll. | ||
| How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop or whatever it's called? | ||
|
unidentified
|
And a little owl goes, one, a two, a three, crunch, a three. | |
| And it's the same thing. | ||
| I can never get through five or six articles without one of them making me mad and then going off. | ||
| Onto a rant that makes me think of something else that goes to another rant. | ||
| But, in the interest of time, we are going to come back, open the phones up, and take a lot of calls. | ||
| I mean, that's just poor impulse control, really. | ||
| Right. | ||
| The joke of that is the owl should be licking it a great deal more times. | ||
| Right! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes! | |
| And by failing, he has proved both that... | ||
| He's addicted to candy, and he hates that turtle guy or whatever it was. | ||
| The turtle, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Was it a turtle? | ||
| I think so, yeah. | ||
| At least in the original one. | ||
| Uh-oh. | ||
| Somebody's after us. | ||
| Someone heard that you're doing heroin. | ||
| No, they heard you shitting on a Manchester hotel. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| Is that illegal here? | ||
| I don't know the law. | ||
| No ill words about the lodging. | ||
| So, I have some problems with this. | ||
| The first, obviously, is, like you mentioned, the Tootsie Roll owl has no intention. | ||
| Of licking. | ||
| He just wants to get to the center of that pop. | ||
| They didn't go in planning to help the kid or the turtle find out how many licks it takes to get to the center only to change their mind two licks in. | ||
| So if this metaphor is to hold, then Alex is really just saying that it's always his intention to find that story that will set him off and launch a rant. | ||
| He knows what the audience wants. | ||
| That's the Tootsie Roll center of the pop. | ||
| Sure, maybe you'd end up with more information if you took your time and licked the Tootsie Pop. | ||
| That shit's boring. | ||
| Takes too long. | ||
| Chomp on that shit. | ||
| Take the shortcut. | ||
| That, of course, is analogous to how Alex lies about the stories he's covering and fakes the emotion that helps make his rant seem interesting. | ||
| These are the shortcuts that he uses to afford the laborious licking, which in this case is a metaphor for doing his fucking job. | ||
| At least in the original 1969 commercial, the depressed-ass turtle has the decency to tell the kid he has no idea how many licks it takes because, quote, he can't stop himself from biting it. | ||
| The kid comes up and he's like, I don't know, I'm just gonna bite that thing. | ||
| I like that somehow a Tootsie Roll commercial has turned into one of the great satirizing of the media of our time. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Scathing. | ||
| Yeah, absolutely. | ||
| The owls are Alex, the mainstream media's the turtle, and we're all getting fucked over by both of them because the turtle's lying to us about how many licks. | ||
| The owl's eating our shit. | ||
| Yeah, and it's essential for our survival to know how many fucking licks it takes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It is essential! | |
| Yeah. | ||
| That's the thing about misinformation these days. | ||
| Yeah, we nailed it. | ||
| The Zoomers haven't seen that commercial. | ||
| We need to show the Zoomers the commercial. | ||
| Also, fun fact, that owl was originally voiced by Paul Winchell, who was also the voice of Tigger and Gargamel. | ||
| That is a fun fact. | ||
| Yeah, he was a world-famous ventriloquist who works with his puppet Jerry Mahoney, one of the legends in the ventriloquism game. | ||
| A puppet named Jerry Mahoney? | ||
| Yeah, you don't know about Jerry Mahoney? | ||
| I like that. | ||
| He's one of the big ones. | ||
| I like that these days. | ||
| It's all like the demon guy or whatever it is. | ||
| Not just like a regular ass name. | ||
| Also, this ventriloquist who did the voice of the owl in the Tootsie Pop commercials may have invented the artificial heart that allowed for the first heart transplants. | ||
| Which he developed alongside Dr. Henry Heimlich, the guy who invented the Heimlich maneuver. | ||
| Crazy. | ||
| There's not enough guys, man! | ||
| There's not enough guys! | ||
| What are the rest of us doing? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Also... | |
| Think about this if you want your mind blown. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sure. | |
| The guy who invented the Heimlich maneuver died after Trump was elected president. | ||
| He lived that long! | ||
| That maneuver is not that old. | ||
| Hey, man. | ||
| I just don't even know anymore. | ||
| Where am I in time? | ||
| This is a simulation, right? | ||
| I think so. | ||
| I think it has to be. | ||
| Yeah, I think so. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So Alex gets down to business and tries to get to calls, which of course means he gets completely lost in the weeds. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And, you know... | ||
| You know, it is what it is. | ||
| I'm not going to preach here today. | ||
| I'm going to do something different. | ||
| I'm going to do it. | ||
| I'm not going to cover news until about 45 after and then I'll hit all the big top stories. | ||
| They're here. | ||
| Is that because there's no news? | ||
| All the insanity. | ||
| Obamacare, even worse than I thought. | ||
| Designed for pure fraud and incredible preparations for martial law and school children being taught that they must follow the orders of government no matter what and their parents are bad. | ||
| Russell Brand, listener of the show, said that he took a job working in a newspaper because he was enamored with the beautiful woman that headed it up. | ||
| He was enchanted by her. | ||
| Instead of saying, oh, how romantic, the chivalry, the, oh no, he's been skewered by the film Nazis. | ||
| He's been skewered by them who know that they're taking over the culture. | ||
| It's not about empowering women. | ||
| It's about empowering them as tyrants. | ||
| Never before, but with modern feminism as it's called, have we seen women more debased, more bankrupted, more unhealthy, more brought low, more dishonored, more trampled. | ||
| And Russell Brand tells the establishment anti-human authoritarian salon, He took a job working somewhere because he was so enchanted with the female editor that edited it up. | ||
| And then they called that hateful and all the rest of it. | ||
| When I was asked to edit an issue of the New Statesman, I said yes because it was a beautiful woman asking me. | ||
| See, just the act of men and women loving each other, just the purity and goodness of that, is anathema to these people. | ||
| They know what they're doing. | ||
| They say you can't dress up like a cowboy on Halloween. | ||
| It's hurtful to cowboys. | ||
| They are the arbiters of reality. | ||
| They put you in a smaller and smaller cage where your mommy and daddy can't make your lunch. | ||
| They're not trusted. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Where if someone says, hey, let's go eat Chinese food, everyone goes, ooh, don't say Chinese. | |
| I've witnessed that. | ||
| This is the ultimate tyranny, and it's done by design. | ||
| These are not misguided liberals. | ||
| These are... | ||
| Conscious dominators of the psyche. | ||
| Were you going to get the calls? | ||
| Because that was fucked up. | ||
| So about that simulation thing, huh? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Do you know what I've begun to appreciate about this show? | ||
| As, like, 2023 starts getting into real motion. | ||
| Or, I mean, whatever. | ||
| We're prepared. | ||
| Fuck it. | ||
| Yeah, almost in October now. | ||
| The year's starting to get into motion. | ||
| No idea. | ||
| No clue. | ||
| Is Halloween on the 30th? | ||
| Anyway. | ||
| No. | ||
| It's like, every time we go back in time, the hashtag, like, Alex Jones was right, should actually have been, like, the complete opposite. | ||
| If everybody was paying attention, it would have been like, Alex Jones was wrong, and that's why we arrested Russell Brand 10 years ago. | ||
| You know, like, everything we go back, we're like, oh, 20 years ago, Alex Jones was like, hey, I'll tell you what, this Bob Iger guy is super cool! | ||
| Whoa, whoa, whoa, red flag, red flag! | ||
| Yeah, exactly! | ||
| If everybody had had one of us 20 years ago, we would be fine! | ||
| Oh, if only we could be on our 27th year of doing this show. | ||
| God. | ||
| Yeah, it is weird to go back in time, though, and see these things that are so prescient. | ||
| It's no good. | ||
| Every time something terrible happens in the present, eventually somebody on Twitter is like, you know you could have seen this coming 20 years ago. | ||
| Just listen to Alex. | ||
| If he supports something, it's bad. | ||
| Terrible. | ||
| It's interesting, though, this other formulation that he has here, where it's like, you can't dress up like a cowboy because it's offensive to cowboys. | ||
| Yeah, obviously. | ||
| Obviously, this is about him being mad about ethnic appropriations in costumes. | ||
| I was going to say, this is blackface. | ||
| Cowboy face is the exact same thing as blackface. | ||
| That's essentially what he's doing. | ||
| And then jumping over to you can't say Chinese food, which is strange. | ||
| But, I mean, you've got to take the handholds where you can find them if you're climbing this bullshit rock. | ||
| I have no idea why you can't call it Chinese food. | ||
| Well, can you dress up like a cowboy? | ||
| Sichuan? | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Mandarin? | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| Cantonese? | ||
| Well, I mean, if you want to get real specific with it. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Any more? | ||
| Nope. | ||
| There's tons more. | ||
| If I can name all five Spice Girls, then you have to name every... | ||
| I should be able to name the 138 countries... | ||
|
unidentified
|
From the top! | |
| All right, fair. | ||
| Fine. | ||
| No. | ||
| Can't do it. | ||
| Fair enough. | ||
| So Alex finally does go to calls. | ||
| He gets a caller, and this caller has a fucking awesome question for Alex, which is, hey bro, do you like sci-fi? | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's more people awake every day, and it's coming to a conclusion sometime in the future. | |
| Are you a science fiction fan, Alex? | ||
| I am a science fiction fan back when I had time to read The Greats. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Can't help but feel what's happening now. | |
| Do you remember at the end of the first Star Wars movie where the X-Wing fighters are coming in and the lieutenant goes up to the Death Star commander? | ||
| I think it was played by Peter Cushing. | ||
| And he said, you know, we better evacuate. | ||
| These guys are on to something. | ||
| Do you remember what Peter Cushing said? | ||
| He said, evacuate in a moment of triumph? | ||
| I think you overestimate their chances. | ||
| I think, I really feel like... | ||
| Evacuation in a moment of triumph? | ||
| I think you overestimate their chances. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I love that scene, Alex. | |
| It's why the Greeks and the great American authors and Shakespeare wrote about arrogance and hubris is because it will be the downfall of people that try to take control without honor. | ||
| Several fighters have broken off from the main group. | ||
| All right, brother, God bless you. | ||
| I appreciate you calling in. | ||
| Let's go ahead and talk to Brian in Canada. | ||
| Good call from Canada. | ||
| That's how you do a call in a minute. | ||
| That is how you do a call in a minute. | ||
| Caller brings up an idea and you do two Star Wars impressions. | ||
| Alright, I'm going to explain my point via a Star Wars reference and then you're just going to be like, oh man, Luke and Leia made out, right? | ||
| That's weird. | ||
| I like that the caller is basically making a point and then Alex is like, I think he's asking me to do that voice. | ||
| I think I'm going to do that voice and another one. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I find your lack of faith disturbing. | |
| Did you have to hold your throat while you did that? | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| Otherwise I would screech like I normally do. | ||
| Are there any screeching Star Wars characters? | ||
| I mean, the Wailing Jizz was pretty screeching. | ||
| In the remastered version of Return of the Jedi, they give an entire musical number to the Wailing Jizz right before Luke Skywalker comes in and... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jabba the Hutt is like, I'm going to throw you into the... | |
| Do the voice. | ||
| Come on! | ||
| Do the Jabba the Hutt voice. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Good. | |
| Hold on. | ||
| That's better. | ||
| Salacious Crumb, I got. | ||
| I would like to do a physical impression of Jabba, which is, I'd like to lay on my side. | ||
| I'd like it to get strangled by beautiful women. | ||
| Wait, no, what? | ||
| Wait, what? | ||
| So, we get nowhere with that caller. | ||
| They've elicited some voices, which is something. | ||
| It's fun. | ||
| But we get another caller, and this caller asks what I would describe as a very heady question, which is trouble. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Alex, I am another one of those Canadians who love you to death up here, and I just wanted to say this is maybe a little bit off topic, but I guess I just wanted to share it with you. | |
| Your slogan says, because there's a war on for your mind. | ||
| And I just wondered, Alex, if you would share with your audience what your thoughts are with regard to mind versus brain. | ||
| Is the mind the same as the brain in your estimation? | ||
| Holy shit, man! | ||
| This is your response, brother. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| Whoa, whoa, whoa. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck! | |
| I don't even know the answer to that question. | ||
| If I were Alex sitting at the studio and someone asked me, I'd be like, get the fuck off the line. | ||
| You asked me that question. | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| Unless we're sitting around a hookah, having a nice time. | ||
| I haven't had a hookah in a long time, my man. | ||
| What do you think? | ||
| What do you think is the difference between the mind and the brain? | ||
| I don't give a fuck. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| The brain is a physical thing. | ||
| The mind is boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. | ||
| I'm sold. | ||
| All right. | ||
| So are we ready for Alex's answer? | ||
| Yeah, let's do it. | ||
| Because it's painful rambling. | ||
| I believe that. | ||
| I'm no scientist, but I've read a lot of scientific reports and had a lot of top experts on, and I don't get into some of the areas where they can't completely prove everything, but throughout time immemorial, historians, researchers have pointed out that there's something more than just the brain. | ||
| It's like they can do a perfect clone that's 100% the same. | ||
| And for some reason, it just doesn't have the same vigor. | ||
| It doesn't matter whether it's a lizard, whether it's a mammal. | ||
| It just isn't the same. | ||
| And we know that there are a sixth sense. | ||
| We know there are magnetic cells in the brains, not just of mammals, but of birds and other fish. | ||
| That's how they're able to navigate. | ||
| It's how they're able to fly south of the winter. | ||
| It's how a hummingbird can fly 5,000 miles. | ||
| The brain is able to go into the fourth and fifth dimension in calculations that it's able to make. | ||
| And of course, we live in the third dimension. | ||
| We sure do. | ||
| Alright, so there's six senses. | ||
| Alright, so we live in the third dimension, which means we are free from time. | ||
| No issues there. | ||
| Well, I feel that way on this trip for sure. | ||
| I feel no attachment to time. | ||
| I thought it was two weeks from now, but that's fine. | ||
| Yeah, you're living in July. | ||
| Okay, so have we cloned any? | ||
| Actually, that's a good question. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes, the problem with clones is they lack vigor. | |
| Well, obviously that's the problem. | ||
| I remember Dolly and the Sheep. | ||
| I'm just wondering, have we cloned any lizards? | ||
| I feel like we've only cloned lizards in Jurassic Park! | ||
| And those fuckers were vigorous. | ||
| They were vigorous as fuck. | ||
| Fat acid and shit? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Dolly the sheep was pretty lazy, though. | ||
| How's Dolly doing? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Is Dolly dead? | ||
| I have bad news. | ||
| What? | ||
| How's Dr. Grand Prix? | ||
| Hanging out with Dolly. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Alright. | |
| Yeah, so we get six senses, which are apparently like how birds can geolocate and fish can go back to where they spawn and reproduce. | ||
| But those are fish and birds. | ||
| I don't know what that has to do with the human mind and brain. | ||
| They're magnets. | ||
| How do they work? | ||
| That is a great question. | ||
| Shout out to the juggalo we met in Scotland. | ||
| I also would have thought that the part about going in the fourth and fifth dimensions, that would have been the mind, not the brain. | ||
| I'm lost. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What is the place you go to? | |
| What is the difference between the fourth and fifth dimension? | ||
| Do you go to the fourth dimension first and you're like, man, these people are shit out here. | ||
| So I'm going to head to the fifth dimension, see what's going on there. | ||
| And then you just go back? | ||
| How does it work? | ||
| You've got to go through the fourth on the way back, though. | ||
| Oh, that's shit. | ||
| It's like a long drive. | ||
| It's like the drive from Chicago to New York. | ||
| It's like, fuck, I've got to go through Pennsylvania? | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Pennsylvania, the fourth dimension. | ||
| Yeah, I don't know. | ||
| I'm all lost on all of this. | ||
| I don't think Alex was expecting a question like this, and his response shows. | ||
| So we get to learn a little bit more about these six senses in this next clip. | ||
| I'm into it. | ||
| Well, Alex expounds on that a tiny bit. | ||
| Most of us have had dreams where exactly that dream comes true. | ||
| Not like you dream of being a rock star to become a rock star. | ||
| I mean, you dream of being mugged. | ||
| That's happened to me. | ||
| And then six months later or whatever, the exact mugging happened. | ||
| And it's like deja vu. | ||
| And you even know what the person's going to do. | ||
| And it's almost like your brain was able to jump forward into the future. | ||
| It's not like deja vu where you think you've seen this before. | ||
| You talk about it. | ||
| You remember it. | ||
| It's very upsetting. | ||
| Those dreams are waking dreams is what I call them. | ||
| Where you know it's real. | ||
| When I was a child, I had them obviously more. | ||
| It's been marked throughout history that children are more sensitive. | ||
| It's why the globalists like to abuse and hurt them. | ||
| True. | ||
| Because, you know, the evil wants to feed on that. | ||
| But, I mean, I still have waking dreams. | ||
| And you always know one. | ||
| Even if it's something good coming. | ||
| But most of us, the most common waking dream is of your children unborn. | ||
| A lot of times parents, when their children will have dreams about their grandchildren. | ||
| That's very common. | ||
| My dad had dreams about my daughters. | ||
| And then only later when, oh my God, that was the little blonde haired girls I imagined that were going to be my children. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That was exactly them. | |
| That's the issue. | ||
| It was a little later he said, oh my gosh, that was that dream. | ||
| Or he told my mom about this when they first got married. | ||
| We're going to have daughters. | ||
| I've seen these daughters. | ||
| They weren't his daughters. | ||
| They were his granddaughters. | ||
| And the enemy knows this. | ||
| That's why they don't want you to think there's anything else outside of what we can say. | ||
| One minute per call, buddy. | ||
| One minute per call. | ||
| Talking about your dad prophesying your daughters. | ||
| I had a bunch of dreams about young women, and I'm like, that's okay. | ||
| Yeah, I feel like I'm reaching a point where I think that everything that Alex says his dad told him is made up. | ||
| I don't think his dad has said any of these things. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, it's either... | ||
| It's either he's making up what his dad is saying, or his dad is a creepy psychopath who keeps lying to Alex just as a sort of weird experiment. | ||
| If he was the smartest boy in Texas, perhaps his whole idea was like, I'm going to raise a child like a weird fucking evil bullet to shoot into regular society and break everybody's fucking brains. | ||
| And then he's also like, but I'm going to make him think some weird shit too. | ||
| But I think that if that's the case, which I'm into, I think that would be interesting narratively. | ||
| I'm not into it, but it's not a terrible idea. | ||
| Well, from a storyline perspective, I think it's fascinating. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sure, sure. | |
| But it also then has to be the case that Alex's dad has such discipline that he never involves himself in anything. | ||
| Like, the first time I ever saw him physically was in that deposition that he got dragged in for. | ||
| Like, he never comes on air. | ||
| He never does anything. | ||
| And that, to me, I think is, you know... | ||
| The sign of a brilliant psychopath. | ||
| See, it could be! | ||
| Yeah, I mean, he's like Pablo Escobar. | ||
| But see, we see... | ||
| Lack of impulse control on Alex's part. | ||
| And you're describing a shocking level in this psychopath dad of his that we're imagining. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's true. | |
| I had a dream about his dad being a psychopath with great discipline when I was a child. | ||
| Back when I was more sensitive. | ||
| It's crazy because I had a dream about your granddaughters. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Yeah! | ||
| Oh, that sucks. | ||
| I'm gonna have kids. | ||
| That sucks. | ||
| This is a terrible way to find that out. | ||
| Illegitimate kid ten years ago. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's fine. | |
| Oh, what a relief. | ||
| That's the best news ever. | ||
| It's so good. | ||
| It's good news. | ||
| They'll never ask for money. | ||
| So I have more good news. | ||
| We have a guest. | ||
| The silence from the never ask for money part? | ||
| We have a guest coming on here, and it is someone who we don't get to see all that often anymore these days. | ||
| It's a man named Max Kaiser. | ||
| Max Coin. | ||
| The king of the Bitcoin, Max Coin. | ||
| I do like when he shows up. | ||
| And that's because he is the only person who outwardly disrespects Alex. | ||
| I don't think that this episode is a good example of it, but he's the only person who seems to have the freedom to just be like, hey, fuck you. | ||
| I'm going to do a bit on your show. | ||
| But this isn't that. | ||
| This is him trying to sell Bitcoin. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| In the meantime, Bitcoin has surged to become the Napster of currencies, to totally be threatening to all central banks and bankers everywhere. | ||
| And as the days go on, we're finding out this is to be the case. | ||
| And of course, the big story this week was somebody bought Bitcoins in 2009 for $57, and now they're worth $800,000. | ||
| He just bought an apartment in Norway. | ||
| And these types of stories are bringing a lot of attention to Bitcoin. | ||
| Who was really behind Bitcoin? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Uh-oh. | |
| What? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa, whoa, whoa. | |
| Now we're in some... | ||
| Activists who hate bankers. | ||
| So you've got a group of folks back in 2009 who put what's called a Bitcoin protocol onto the Internet, which is, I think, the most remarkable piece of technology and insight since going back to Copernicus, you know, who reasoned that, in fact, the sun was at the center of the solar system and not the Earth. | ||
|
unidentified
|
At the time, he had a lot of flack for that. | |
| The creators of Bitcoin have figured out that you can take the encryption algorithms used for sending encrypted emails and you can turn that into a currency that would be completely stateless and completely safe to use outside of all government interference. | ||
| It's a complete, ingenious idea. | ||
| And it's changing to the entire global economy. | ||
| I want to be clear. | ||
| I want to be clear. | ||
| I totally believe in free, open, digital currencies, believe it is the wave of the future. | ||
| It gives the power of fiat to the people and the power of choice, and a bunch will emerge, and whatever's the most trusted and the best will become preeminent, and it could take the globalists out of the equation. | ||
| My issue is I believe whatever the first big one is, they're going to try to sabotage it, demonize it, come after it, so I haven't endorsed it to my listeners because I, when it ends up getting brought down if it does, I don't want to be connected to that just because I understand how volatile and dangerous it is. | ||
| See, now this is interesting. | ||
| Because what we've got going on here is Alex being rightly skeptical about Bitcoin in the face of Max Keiser. | ||
| No, he was being wrongly skeptical. | ||
| Well, his point was wrong, but he was right to be skeptical. | ||
| He was right to be skeptical. | ||
| He was doing it poorly, but he was right, yes. | ||
| It creates an alternate universe right now. | ||
| So if Bitcoin is at $57... | ||
| Put it up on the whiteboard. | ||
| So it's at $57. | ||
| Every one of his listeners at least spends $57 on his shit. | ||
| If they had bought two Bitcoin, those people would have turned $57 into $60,000 right now. | ||
| So of all the things that Alex could have done, he could have made every InfoWars listener a... | ||
| Theoretically? | ||
| And if they had gotten out at the right time, it could have been even higher? | ||
| Well, I mean, right now is the right... | ||
| I mean, it's still 20 grand or something like that. | ||
| That's crazy! | ||
| Compared to like 10 cents that it was at one point. | ||
| I am so weirded out by Max Keiser being an inexplicably terrible and at the same time inexplicably great financial advisor. | ||
| He has a niche spot. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, it's like, again, Alex is right to be skeptical. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But Max is right because Bitcoin is so insanely expensive now. | ||
| Yeah, well, that's the flip side of what I was saying, is like, if Alex had not been skeptical and just jumped in, he would be a billionaire now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know! | |
| Like Max Keiser is. | ||
| Like, of all the things for... | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| This fucks with my head. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Because I do feel like if we're in a simulation, there is a moment where Alex is like, Eh, fuck it. | ||
| I'll buy 10,000 Bitcoin for eight cents. | ||
| Max offered him 10,000 Bitcoins. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Now, let me ask you this. | ||
| I'm going to lose my mind. | ||
| Does it fuck with your brain? | ||
| or does it fuck with your mind? | ||
|
unidentified
|
All right. | |
| Well, the rest of the show's gonna... | ||
| Oh, he's back. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I thought about it. | ||
| So, you know, obviously there's an obsession that Alex has had over the years with the idea of getting rid of saying mother and father. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| We can't do it. | ||
| Purple penguins. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Purple penguins aren't in play here, but Max has an interesting theory about how they will stop us from using mother and father. | ||
| Okay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, just a couple of late-breaking things that are happening during the break here. | |
| First of all, you just said they banned the word mother and father. | ||
| How do they do that? | ||
| They use copyright law. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They'll say, we own the word mother and father. | |
| That's the problem with professional copyright law. | ||
| Now, you can't even use the word mother and father. | ||
| They use copyright law. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's how they create the copyright apartheid. | |
| Well, isn't political correctness a type of copyright where everything becomes racist? | ||
| It's not about political correctness. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They'll present it as being somehow politically motivated or ideologically motivated. | |
| No. | ||
| It's about just they want to own it. | ||
| They want to own the word. | ||
| And then if you ever use the words, they want you to pay them. | ||
| If you can't pay, they'll lend you the money. | ||
| It's all in economics. | ||
| There's no ideology whatsoever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
If everyone thinks this is ideologically driven, they're falling into the trap. | |
| It's just money, money, money. | ||
| Money, money, money. | ||
| That's a little dumb, huh? | ||
| I genuinely don't understand the sequence of events that would occur. | ||
| All right. | ||
| The globalists copyright the word mother and father. | ||
| Like happy birthday. | ||
| No, not the words. | ||
| The song, maybe. | ||
| So they copyright happy birthday and that way if you sing it in a movie you have to pay them a million dollars. | ||
| So the globalists have copyrighted both mother and father. | ||
| So you can only say mom in a movie. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| Someone else owns that copyright. | ||
| Mama? | ||
| Someone else has that. | ||
| Warner Brothers bought it recently. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, I've copyrighted the word human. | ||
| You are all no longer humans. | ||
| That's worth a couple of Bitcoin right there. | ||
| I love it when you just pop in and find something really fucking stupid like this. | ||
| Somebody just out of their depth trying to roll with one of Alex's dumb headlines. | ||
| Like, the news of the day is they have banned mother and father. | ||
| And so now we have to rationalize that with copyright law. | ||
| Don't you think... | ||
| And you take it to an office and there's a person who's reading it going like, oh shit. | ||
| I didn't know we could do this. | ||
| Stamp. | ||
| No one's thought to do this. | ||
| This is out of control. | ||
| I'm going to copyright the word arm. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| All three letter words are mine now. | ||
| So I think it's time for a commercial break. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Good call. | ||
| Yeah, so here we go. | ||
| Here's one of the commercials that Alex was playing at this period of his career. | ||
|
unidentified
|
An e-cig revolution is sweeping across the country. | |
| But is yours American-made? | ||
| Vapriate e-liquid by Le Cig is. | ||
| Manufactured in Arkansas with 100% USA-sourced ingredients. | ||
| And when you buy American, you support local jobs. | ||
| Vapriate e-liquid by Le Cig is top quality at an affordable price. | ||
| The very principle that once drove the American economy. | ||
| Get great taste with no ash, tar, or smoke. | ||
| You're wondering why you didn't make the change to Vapriate e-liquid by Le Cig a long time ago. | ||
| LeCig.com has everything you need for beginners to the advanced vaping enthusiast with a wide variety of hardware. | ||
| And also important e-liquid flavors as well. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| I want to describe the difference between the beginner and the advanced. | ||
| I was curious about that myself. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| And I wonder where I fall on that spectrum. | ||
| I'm not a beginner. | ||
| Is it length of time? | ||
| Is it number of pulls per hour? | ||
| You think it's just clock and shifts? | ||
| I mean, yeah. | ||
| See, what I see is like a Fitbit for vaping. | ||
| So it's like, oh, I got 10,000 vapes today. | ||
| I'm an advanced vaper. | ||
| This is a Glidewell thing. | ||
| You have to get your 10,000 hours of vaping. | ||
| You have to have a Glidewell for anything. | ||
| I think it's about if you can be fancy with it. | ||
| Some people can blow smoke rings. | ||
| I can't do that, so I'm a beginner. | ||
|
unidentified
|
If you can Gandalf it, you're an advanced vapor. | |
| Oh, I blew a ship that flies in the sky. | ||
| Yeah, I wish I could do that. | ||
| I just don't have the patience. | ||
| Or magic? | ||
| What is magic but patience? | ||
| The end result of patience. | ||
| I have no rebuttal. | ||
| I do like this, though, attaching patriotism to vapes. | ||
| Absolutely! | ||
| And this is back in, what, 2013? | ||
| This is way early for that. | ||
| And then he stopped. | ||
| Anyway, we get back to the show and we find out something else that Alex's dad has told him. | ||
| Okay, that's always my favorite. | ||
| I believe at this point Max Keiser has left us, but we get to hear about a dumb thing Alex's dad said. | ||
| Let me tell you, these bureaucrats come around, folks, a lot of them, they look you right in the eye. | ||
| My dad, when I was a kid, the IRS called him and he said, I have all my receipts. | ||
| I've paid all this. | ||
| I don't owe you all this back tax stuff. | ||
| And the woman said, Mr. Jones, we are white-collar criminals. | ||
| This is before people would record stuff. | ||
| Interesting admission. | ||
| That's the way you just said that. | ||
| She said, look, we're going to destroy you and your family. | ||
| Another interesting thing to say. | ||
| And my dad came home and I remember was freaked out for weeks. | ||
| My dad never gets depressed. | ||
| My dad was shook up bad. | ||
| And then they started taking his bank accounts. | ||
| He fought them for years. | ||
| These are gang-raping criminals. | ||
| They want to hurt you. | ||
| They're bank robbers in huge swarm clusters like locusts coming in on us. | ||
| They're not going to stop. | ||
| They're never going to stop. | ||
| They're armed into the teeth against us. | ||
| They're telling troops they can't be Christians. | ||
|
unidentified
|
These people are Joe Stalin on PCP, okay? | |
| And they're pedophiles, okay? | ||
| That's the main brigade. | ||
| That took a turn. | ||
| That was... | ||
| That was probably the closest I've ever been to, like, a 1940s gangster with a Tommy gun just firing a million bullets into major... | ||
| Ah! | ||
| They're pedophiles! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah! | |
| My dad told me the IRS admitted they're just white-collar criminals. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| No? | ||
| I don't believe that. | ||
| I don't think he's telling the truth about any of this. | ||
| No, but again, this gets to that interesting distinction. | ||
| Is this... | ||
| Something Alex's dad actually said to him, or is this just whole cloth? | ||
| Yeah, like imagine Alex's dad... | ||
| So what happens if David Jones, not David Bowie, comes home one day and is like, okay, Alex, I had a bad day. | ||
| And Alex is like, oh, what's going on? | ||
| And he's like, I don't know. | ||
| Like, how do you describe that to a child? | ||
| Well, the IRS done told me that they're white-collar criminals and they want to murder us. | ||
| And there's Stalin. | ||
| And troops can no longer be Christian. | ||
| And would you like some dessert? | ||
| Right. | ||
| I don't think they said any of that. | ||
| You don't think so? | ||
| That's such a weird thing to open with! | ||
| Hey, by the way, basically we're white-collar criminals and there's nothing you can do about it. | ||
| How do you do? | ||
| Just doing a little bit of workplace visit? | ||
| We're white-collar criminals. | ||
| Yeah, it seems unlikely. | ||
| That's absurd. | ||
| So Alex gets to talk a little bit more about this idea that you can't dress up like a cowboy because it's offensive. | ||
| And I think he's being intentionally obtuse. | ||
| 2010, M4 has reported on an effort by a coalition of more than 30 liberal organizations to shut down the First Amendment right of political enemies. | ||
| And they're doing the same thing in Europe, folks. | ||
| These are the enemy. | ||
| And so they're trying to hide in plain view. | ||
| Your kids don't belong to you. | ||
| They belong to the state. | ||
| MSNBC promo. | ||
| Don't go out as a cowboy. | ||
| That hurts the cowboys. | ||
| And don't go out as a Native American. | ||
| That's racist and insensitive. | ||
| And don't be a gaucher girl. | ||
| Wait, what? | ||
| Don't be an artist. | ||
| Don't have fun. | ||
| Next, don't dress up like Spider-Man. | ||
| It's racist against spiders. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Don't put green paint on your skin. | ||
| It's racist against the Hulk. | ||
| It's just getting you all like where you can't even talk. | ||
| You go, oh, I'm sorry. | ||
| They're like, that's okay. | ||
| Do what we say and you'll be all right. | ||
| See, this is the problem that I have with my left-leaning friends. | ||
| I try to dress up like Spider-Man. | ||
| I get cancelled! | ||
| I am tired of people denying the Hulk genocide. | ||
| It's very disappointing to me. | ||
| I think Alex is intentionally not getting the point. | ||
| So we've got cowboys offended by chaps. | ||
| Or I guess maybe those black masks like the Lone Ranger had. | ||
| Was he a cowboy or was he a thief? | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| Was he a good guy or a bad guy? | ||
| I genuinely have no idea anymore. | ||
| Here's the point of the show where I realize I don't know what the Lone Ranger was. | ||
| I vaguely remember that Johnny Depp was the Lone Ranger and now I'm against it. | ||
| I know that there were like a mask. | ||
| So we got that. | ||
| Then we got spiders who have been writing letters with all eight legs for a long time. | ||
| They get eight times as many letters to their congressmen as we do. | ||
| And then you have, again, hulks. | ||
| By the way, can we talk about how spiders have been getting away with representation without taxation for way too long? | ||
| It's the reverse of the revolution. | ||
| They're fucking squatters. | ||
| Oh, I eat other bugs. | ||
| Great. | ||
| Here's the ultimate problem, though. | ||
| I feel like you're forgetting that if a Hulk is offended, they will smash. | ||
| As opposed to write a letter and say, I'm offended. | ||
| Yeah, there's not going to be some complaining. | ||
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| Hulk smash. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Strange. | |
| Yes, much like the Kool-Aid Man. | ||
| Which, let's not get started on dressing up like the Kool-Aid Man. | ||
| Oh, that's offensive to red. | ||
| It's offensive to jars and pitchers. | ||
| So Alex, in this next clip, he kind of fakes some excitement in himself by talking about how demonic his enemies are. | ||
| Sure. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They are the enemy. | |
| The enemy. | ||
| The enemy, enemy, enemy, enemy, enemy. | ||
| The enemy. | ||
| The sworn enemy of everything good. | ||
| They are demonic. | ||
| They are the hordes of hell. | ||
| They are absolute anathema to everything good. | ||
| They are the plague. | ||
| They are the scourge. | ||
| They are the traitor. | ||
| They are the destroyer of ideas. | ||
| They are the opposite of liberal. | ||
| It's three horror adjectives. | ||
| You signed on with these people, you've signed on to absolute hell. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh my God. | |
| And they're really going to try it. | ||
| And believe me, I just want them to know, they strike me down, set me up, whatever, I've already won, not being a pile of garbage, traitorous filth like you. | ||
| Don't you get it? | ||
| I'm not worried about what you do to my body. | ||
| Even if there isn't a God or a life after this, my family goes on. | ||
| All that matters is that you be beaten so that people in the future can have a chance to enjoy God's creation and to build something better. | ||
| That's what life's all about. | ||
| It's stretching forward like all our ancestors did to try to get finger holds into a future of honor and goodness. | ||
| The public has been psych-warfared with demonic evil, the sitcoms, the dramas. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm sorry? | |
| each other's cheating sex it's all meant to just fry everyone everyone engaged in evil thinks they've learned some secret technology of betrayal and they're smart you're not and they deploy lies on you like like like it's a game and they're winning they don't know they're losing by being frauds they don't know they're losing by being scammers they don't know they're losing everything everything they're dishonorable and it is our responsibility It's our responsibility to crush them politically. | ||
| It is our responsibility to disdain them and to call them out for the pieces of trash they are and do the opposite of everything they say. | ||
| You want to know a battle plan? | ||
| Do the opposite of everything they say. | ||
| If everyone else is something, it's the gift of death. | ||
| You got that? | ||
| Anything they push is failure. | ||
| Everything they push is meant to screw you up. | ||
| Everything they promote is meant to poison you physically, mentally, spiritually. | ||
| Everything. | ||
| Everything they are. | ||
| It's the enemy of everything good. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| It's like how the CDC will tell you if you get a cut, you should wash it out. | ||
| Do the opposite. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Get it dirtier. | ||
| I mean, I almost appreciate this clip because it shows us that all we should have done is said to a group of people the opposite of what they shouldn't do. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Give bad advice. | ||
| And then they do it. | ||
| Yeah, if we give them bad advice, they would do it. | ||
| But if we give... | ||
| Other people good advice, they'd do it. | ||
| And then we'd all do the same thing for different reasons. | ||
| I think you run the risk of one organization giving contrary advice to different groups. | ||
| Expecting different groups will pick it up. | ||
| Yeah, that would be strange if the CDC was like, hey, only dumb people take this advice. | ||
| But then you'd almost have to double bluff. | ||
| Smart people would take this advice. | ||
| Not. | ||
| What? | ||
| But dumb people would. | ||
| Oh, God, I don't even know anymore. | ||
| Oh, what tangled webs we weave. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They tell you not to eat spoiled meat. | ||
| You should. | ||
| So I shouldn't? | ||
| Well, if you listen to the officials and the globalists, it's just a recipe for death. | ||
| What's Fauci saying about meat these days? | ||
| These days or in 2013? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, no, no. | |
| I want to know these days. | ||
| I can't tell you that. | ||
| We've been on the road too long. | ||
| I've not gotten a Fauci update. | ||
| Brutal. | ||
| Probably still cool with meat. | ||
| I assume. | ||
| It was never really about meat, was it? | ||
| Nope. | ||
| It was mainly about COVID. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So, calls have been happening. | |
| If you'll recall. | ||
| The agenda was calls. | ||
| That was the idea. | ||
| And we've not gotten to too many of them. | ||
| We've had two calls, right? | ||
| Yep, yep. | ||
| And there were a couple scattered in also, you know, just randomly here and there. | ||
| But we actually only have one more clip left in the episode. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| And it's when Alex gets to another call. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, that's exciting. | |
| And then there is another shocking flash in time. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| A rip in the facade of time. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I can't do this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I can't fake the enthusiasm. | |
| Hold on. | ||
| This is you. | ||
| What do you mean? | ||
| Do you mean there was a rip in the fabric of time? | ||
| See, that's not bad. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nah. | |
| I could do better. | ||
| It's been a long time since I've skipped an acting class. | ||
| When you took an acting class, did they have a faking enthusiasm day? | ||
| Well, I mean, I had to pretend that I wanted to be there. | ||
| So that was pretty close. | ||
| So yes. | ||
| Alright, here we go. | ||
| Here's a caller. | ||
| I would pay your debt back to a local bank or a local group or a family that loans you money. | ||
| Real quick, the caller has asked him if he should pay back his loans. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Should I follow rules and pay back money? | |
| So yeah, in those cases, yes. | ||
| Everybody always cheats, though, with their family. | ||
| If it was with a big bank or something... | ||
| One of the big six narcotics trafficking banks, it's almost your duty, in my view, to not pay. | ||
| And then, of course, you can later settle with them. | ||
| Or do what all the big gangsters do. | ||
| Like Trump and people, they just declare bankruptcy over and over again. | ||
| But, of course, they'll go after you if you're small. | ||
| They only let the billionaires engage in fraud. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| Don't pay back your loans. | ||
| Be a gangster like Trump. | ||
| It is just, if everybody had listened to this show and done the opposite of what he said, we'd be fine! | ||
| Simulation, baby! | ||
| It's like, it is, I mean, it is almost like a Buddhist Cohen, Alex Jones being wrong, because it's like, listen, if you had listened to him... | ||
| He was so wrong that it's just diametric. | ||
| It's a big circle and he's on one side and you should just be on the other. | ||
| That's all you need to do. | ||
| The problem is we've all tried to live in the middle ground. | ||
| We've tried to make Venn diagrams. | ||
| What we should have done is just listen to Alex and been like, I'll do exactly the opposite of everything you say. | ||
| Which is strange because he said you should do the exact opposite of everything we say. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa. | |
| What is the difference between the mind and the brain? | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| Also, I refuse to do the opposite of him on some things. | ||
| Like what? | ||
| Some of his choices in country music are pretty good. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's fair. | |
| Yeah, I'm not going to not like the highway men because he loves them. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| What if we no longer belong to the city? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| You belong to the countryside. | ||
| I would... | ||
| Where's Glenn Frey? | ||
| He lives in England, right? | ||
| Doesn't he? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I thought he did. | ||
| You guys... | ||
| Is the Eagles... | ||
| No, that's gotta be... | ||
| They're from Philadelphia! | ||
| I don't know where... | ||
| The fourth dimension! | ||
| I don't know where Glenn Frey lives, and I genuinely don't know why you would think I would know where Glenn Frey lives. | ||
| My man, you don't keep tabs on Glenn Frey? | ||
| I mean, there's a part of me that is now like, oh... | ||
| Boy, if I had kept tabs on Glenn Frey, this would be the only moment that I could pull that off. | ||
| It would have been huge. | ||
| It would have been huge! | ||
| This place just, a bomb goes off with laughter. | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| Amazed by your ability to recall. | ||
| I do also like, just getting back to this last clip for one second, the idea that Alex is so against people having their student loans forgiven and is on air actively being like, if it's a big bag, don't even fucking pay it back. | ||
| You have an obligation not to. | ||
| You prick. | ||
| Yeah, I like that. | ||
| Put a lot of people in jail for movies, right? | ||
| Good call. | ||
| Well, we come to the end of this, folks. | ||
| It's a little bittersweet. | ||
| What did we learn tonight? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Huh. | |
| One, Spice Girls. | ||
| Smoke American. | ||
| Hit it. | ||
| Hit it. | ||
| Don't quit it. | ||
| That's the advanced move. | ||
| If you want to support the country. | ||
| We don't know what the difference between the mind and the brain is. | ||
| Nope. | ||
| Alex was wrong about Russell Brand and Trump in advance. | ||
| And yet at the same time, by being so wrong diametrically, he was in fact correct. | ||
| So he is a wizard in some sense. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| He's the dumbest. | ||
| There is the oracle at Delphi, and then there's the Alex at fuck yourself. | ||
| Right. | ||
| There's like the oracle at... | ||
| Man, how am I going to pull a city that sucks in Greece? | ||
|
unidentified
|
How am I going to do that? | |
| I bet you could pull one from Pennsylvania. | ||
| Hershey. | ||
| Somehow we're in the UK and I'm still getting regional-based awes? | ||
| I mean, I figured that part out. | ||
| I didn't expect you to be from Louisiana and be like, I will protect every United States! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, thank you all so much. | |
| This has been the show. | ||
| Thank you so much! | ||
|
unidentified
|
We will be back for another episode. | |
| And we will be out at the bar here in a few if you want to come say hello, take a picture or whatever. | ||
| Thank you all so much for coming. |
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