Aug. 21, 2024 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:43:21
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Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out! | |
| The Joe Rogan Experience. | ||
| Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day. | ||
| What's up? | ||
| Hey, how's it going? | ||
| Thanks for coming in. | ||
| My pleasure. | ||
| What's going on? | ||
| It's an honor. | ||
| Good to be here. | ||
| The cold showers, what we were talking about before, those are the hardest. | ||
| Oh, well, New York City cold showers in the winter are brutal. | ||
| Because it doesn't get your whole body, so you actually have to constantly move around and re-freeze your ass off. | ||
| It's hard to breathe, too. | ||
| I used to do them for a while, though. | ||
| When I was a kid, when I used to do martial arts, there was this dude I used to work out with named Bob Caffarella, and he was like a real psycho. | ||
| And Bob used to always take cold showers. | ||
| He said it was good for the spirit. | ||
| It is. | ||
| We would all be sitting around going, what the fuck is wrong with him? | ||
| This guy's in the shower. | ||
| It was January in Boston, and this guy's in the shower, just fucking freezing. | ||
| But I feel like when you do it, it's like you feel afterwards this awakeness that you only get with drugs. | ||
| You never realize how not present you are until you take a cold plunge, and then you're like, oh, now I'm fucking in the world. | ||
| Right, because your body's trying to protect you from dying. | ||
| Yeah, which is a real rush. | ||
| It really is, though. | ||
| It's norepinephrine. | ||
| That's the big one. | ||
| Dopamine kicks up, everything. | ||
| And it lasts for hours. | ||
| That's what I tell people, even though they don't want to do it. | ||
| I'm like, I know it sucks. | ||
| I don't think it's good. | ||
| I don't get in and go, this is amazing. | ||
| I'm the best. | ||
| I get in and I go, oh, Jesus Christ. | ||
| Just keep it together. | ||
| And I just try to stay calm. | ||
| But I know when I get out, I'm going to feel great for hours. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Hours and hours. | ||
| Except for the time I did it. | ||
| On your instruction. | ||
| And fucked up. | ||
|
unidentified
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But... | |
| It was like jackass doing it at home and getting a nut ripped off. | ||
| I saw you do it. | ||
| It looked great. | ||
| Put the ice in the bath. | ||
| And I was just cold for like two days straight. | ||
| It was crazy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I wouldn't recommend doing it for ten minutes the first time. | ||
| You went a little crazy. | ||
| I went a little crazy. | ||
| But kudos to you for doing it. | ||
| It's fucking hard to do ten minutes. | ||
| Well, I used to do a lot of drugs. | ||
| I don't really do drugs anymore. | ||
| I mean, I'll do edibles and occasionally kratom. | ||
| So I guess I do some drugs. | ||
| And I'll do cocaine and heroin, but I'm pretty clean other than that. | ||
|
unidentified
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I mean, I eat processed foods and a lot of dessert, but fuck it. | |
| I mean, crystal meth, but that's it. | ||
| And I drink whiskey, no rocks. | ||
| But I don't do the big drugs, so the cold plunge is really the closest to get to that high. | ||
| Yeah, if you could get that in a pill, it would be a very popular pill. | ||
| People would be taking it all day long. | ||
| I know. | ||
| But part of it is probably going through the pain, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Is this better for your brain? | ||
| Because there's a thing, there's a part in your brain, Andrew Huberman has talked about this, I forget what it's actually called, but there's a part of your brain that actually grows when you force yourself into do difficult things. | ||
| Like, say if you're a person who likes to run, and you force yourself, I'm going to run five miles every morning for 60 days. | ||
| Like, if you can actually do that... | ||
| So an asshole. | ||
| Yeah, an asshole. | ||
| This is my friend Cam. | ||
| I'm trying to imagine myself running. | ||
| I have a buddy of mine that was doing a marathon every day. | ||
| Oh really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He's a psycho. | ||
| He does these ultra marathons. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Where they run for three days. | ||
| He does- It's like Forrest Gump. | ||
| No, Forrest Gump was running. | ||
| Yeah, he ran across the marathon. | ||
| But they do these things through the mountains. | ||
| I think it's the Moab 200 or 240. So it's 240 miles through mountains. | ||
| It's not just straight 240 miles. | ||
| You're going over mountains and hills and shit. | ||
| I can run for about seven minutes, and I'm probably lying about that. | ||
| I'm definitely lying. | ||
| I can run for about four minutes before I have to stop. | ||
| I used to not run at all, and then I entered into a 5K, and I couldn't believe how hard it was to do. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| I thought I was in reasonably good shape. | ||
| Yeah, it's crazy how much more in shape other people are. | ||
| Especially running shape. | ||
| Like the runners are people who can do the sprints. | ||
| They can do something for like a really long time that I can do for maybe like two seconds. | ||
| I think they're drug addicts too, though. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Natural drugs. | ||
| The natural runner's high. | ||
| What do you call it? | ||
| Ephedrine? | ||
| Not ephedrine. | ||
| Euphoria. | ||
| Whatever that thing is. | ||
| Runner's euphoria. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| What are the actual chemicals that get released during a runner's high? | ||
| We'll find that out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's got to be dopamine. | ||
| But there's a thing that you do when you do a lot of cardio where you do get really high. | ||
| Not high in a bad way, but high in a very chill. | ||
| Endorphins. | ||
|
unidentified
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Endorphins. | |
| That's what I was looking for. | ||
| Popular culture identifies these chemicals behind the runner's high. | ||
| So you just... | ||
| It says it's short-lasting. | ||
| I don't think it's that short-lasting. | ||
| But you have to do it for a while. | ||
| You have to run for like, I think, 45 minutes. | ||
| Oh, here it goes. | ||
| It says up to a few hours. | ||
| That makes sense. | ||
| So the bliss, it can last anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours. | ||
| But it's side effects. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, I mean, when you don't do drugs, that's the only way. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| My dad plays tennis every day for like five hours. | ||
| That's a good thing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
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That's a great thing. | |
| He's obsessed. | ||
| All he does is play tennis or watch tennis. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Just a tennis freak? | ||
| He's a tennis freak. | ||
| And he's retired? | ||
| So he just plays tennis all day? | ||
| Just plays tennis. | ||
| He has one of those rackets where you... | ||
| He's a real nerd about where you plug it into the computer and look at the data. | ||
| Whoa! | ||
| And then he's either playing tennis or doing that or just watching tennis on TV. Wow. | ||
| That's all he cares about. | ||
| See, that's one if you get into, you're relying on your vehicle, unfortunately. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| You know, like if you're getting into chess, you can pretty much always move those fucking things around. | ||
|
unidentified
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Yeah, yeah. | |
| You know, if you really get obsessed with chess. | ||
| Chess is my favorite sport. | ||
| Really? | ||
| I'm only out of breath after the first 45. Do you play chess? | ||
| I used to play chess. | ||
| I used to be in the chess club. | ||
| Oh, no kidding. | ||
| I don't play anymore as well, but I love chess, yeah. | ||
| I'm scared of chess. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, I'm scared I'd get addicted to it. | ||
| It's not crack. | ||
| Right, but I don't have any time. | ||
| That's why I won't play golf. | ||
| Same thing. | ||
| I've never played golf. | ||
| The golfers, like Jamie's a big golfer, they'll tell you how awesome it is. | ||
| I'm like, I believe you. | ||
| I'm not going to try it. | ||
| I'm not going to let it get its fucking fangs into me. | ||
| That's how I feel about video games. | ||
| A lot of my comic friends play video games. | ||
| I think that's the worst drug. | ||
| You're just wasting your life. | ||
| There's no intervention. | ||
| Also, it doesn't have to be sunny out. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| Three in the morning. | ||
| I don't want to go to bed. | ||
| I was at my brother's place. | ||
| I played a video game once. | ||
| And I haven't played it since GoldenEye. | ||
| So I hadn't seen any of the improvements. | ||
| So I started playing. | ||
| They're like movies now. | ||
| It's like crazy. | ||
| And I got so hooked. | ||
| There was a moment where I just saw myself being addicted and just snapped out of it. | ||
| It was like four hours straight. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I had to quit cold turkey. | ||
| I used to play Quake online. | ||
| It numbs you out. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| It's just too easy to get a game. | ||
| Because you could always, at any moment in time, I could either be bored, I could be having a conversation that's boring, or I could be doing something boring, or I can just log in and have a death match one-on-one with some dude from fucking Denmark. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| I remember typing, like, where do you live? | ||
| And then people are like, I'm in Estonia. | ||
| Like, whoa, that's crazy. | ||
| While you're killing them. | ||
| You kill each other and you make little pauses. | ||
| It's fun. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| Yeah, it's fun. | ||
| I'm afraid to waste all that time. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| I'm like a workaholic a bit, which obviously you are. | ||
| Yeah, but I think that's okay. | ||
| As long as you're doing something that you actually enjoy, I don't think there's anything wrong with being obsessed with something. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, I'm not a workaholic. | ||
| When I worked at Red Lobster, I was not a workaholic. | ||
| When I worked at Frisch's Big Boy, I was not... | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Let's get this right. | ||
| I think that's the deal with a lot of kids that are bored in school and they're calling them ADHD. Right. | ||
| I think they think that the subjects that are being discussed are boring as fuck. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| They're bouncing off the walls. | ||
| They're 13 years old. | ||
| They have so much fucking energy. | ||
| Why is it never the teacher's fault? | ||
|
unidentified
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Exactly. | |
| It's like, why do the teachers say something interesting? | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| It's like, to be like, oh, no, no, they're just... | ||
| It's like if an audience doesn't laugh and you're like, no, no, no. | ||
| It's not that I'm not funny. | ||
| It's that you have laughing deficit disorder. | ||
| It's like it's throwing the ball onto something else. | ||
| Be interesting. | ||
| There was an article in one of the science journals recently about... | ||
| One of the science magazines recently about ADHD. And then they were saying that it was actually... | ||
| It's an advantage to think that way for hunter-gatherers. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| This is left over from where they're constantly looking at other things and trying to pay attention. | ||
| And they can focus on one thing very intensely, but they're scanning for a bunch of other stuff. | ||
| But you notice. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You're like, ooh, what's that? | ||
| And then it's like a raspberry. | ||
| Also, they're always in activity in motion. | ||
| ADHD may have evolved to help foragers know when to cut their losses. | ||
| Oh, interesting. | ||
| You're too focused, you get killed. | ||
| This is interesting. | ||
| This is not the one that I read, because this is from February. | ||
| The one I read was just a couple of days ago. | ||
| But, symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder such as impulsivity may have helped foragers and hunter-gatherer communities quickly move on to new areas when food sources were low. | ||
| That's amazing. | ||
| So if you're too focused, you don't know when to quit. | ||
|
unidentified
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Right. | |
| And then you get fucking killed or you run out of resources. | ||
| That makes sense. | ||
| It's like an instinct, let's get the fuck out of here. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Well, you know, I got really addicted to Adderall, like everyone. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| I'm scared of that, too. | ||
| I've never tried it. | ||
| I used to, when I was in, after college, I started taking it, like, recreationally. | ||
| I went to a psychiatrist and told her I had a problem. | ||
| And she was like, well, we can prescribe it for you. | ||
| Oh, Jesus Christ! | ||
| Then it'll no longer be a problem. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| I was like, okay, I was thinking more like rehab, but sure. | ||
| What kind of fucking psychiatrist are you going to do? | ||
| She's probably on Adderall right now. | ||
| She's amazing. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Why don't you join me? | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| Let's clean my house. | ||
| I did it for like, I got super, I was doing 90 milligrams a day. | ||
| Is that a lot, Jamie? | ||
| It's a lot. | ||
| What is a normal dose? | ||
| 10? | ||
| Yeah, when I did 20, I was fucking up for 48 hours or something like that. | ||
| It's crystal meth for nerds, but it's crystal meth. | ||
| I mean, it's fucking, it's like, it's intense. | ||
| I was so cocky. | ||
| I wrote poetry. | ||
| That's how high I was. | ||
| I thought I could write poetry. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This gentleman, Norman Ohler, was on my podcast two weeks ago, and he wrote all about meth and the Third Reich. | ||
| Dude, it's crazy. | ||
| And speed, yeah. | ||
| The whole thing was meth. | ||
| They were all methed up. | ||
| They were methed up when they fucking did the Blitzkrieg. | ||
| I do a bit about that now, about Hitler being on speed. | ||
| I'm obsessed with Hitler. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| I have, like, one of my bookshelves is just all Holocaust and Hitler books. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But I'm dying to read that. | ||
| I know Goring was... | ||
| On everything. | ||
| They were all on everything. | ||
| Goring was on, like, huge painkillers the whole time. | ||
| So was Hitler. | ||
| Hitler was on... | ||
| One of the things, the misconceptions that he was on meth, it appears a lot of what he was on was oxys. | ||
| He was on oxycodone. | ||
| Yeah, they had the original oxycodones. | ||
| It's like when you get high and you run over someone, they were like, what the fuck did I do when I was high? | ||
| They don't even care. | ||
| I killed all the juice. | ||
| Did you ever see that video of the lady who's on pills and the cops are telling her to pull over and she doesn't know why and she has no wheel on her car? | ||
| Her car is like spitting flames. | ||
| Have you ever seen it? | ||
| No, I've not seen it. | ||
| And they pull over and she's like, what's the problem? | ||
| And the cop's like, ma'am, are you on pills? | ||
| Like, what the fuck is going on? | ||
| How do you not know you lost a wheel on the highway? | ||
| You know what? | ||
| You gotta see it. | ||
| It's bonkers. | ||
| No, that's insane. | ||
| The Nazis were just all on drugs, which is just like a crazy... | ||
| I mean, the whole Third Reich is surreal. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| So here's this lady. | ||
| She's just driving like nothing's wrong, waving. | ||
| Hi! | ||
|
unidentified
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...back of another car near Quail Hill Shopping Center. | |
| She says her car just gave out. | ||
| Police say the woman was not impaired, and they didn't arrest her. | ||
| What the fuck are you talking about? | ||
| That lady's on pills. | ||
| If she's not impaired, she shouldn't be ever driving. | ||
| If you don't notice, you lost a wheel. | ||
| Right, that's a big red flag. | ||
| Is that the same one? | ||
| That might not have even been the same one. | ||
| It's a longer video of what was happening. | ||
| Look on the screen, longer video. | ||
| Right, okay, this is it. | ||
| Like, there's no way you don't know that. | ||
| There's no way you don't know. | ||
| And the truck's open! | ||
| Also... | ||
| I say that's not even the big problem at this point. | ||
| I can't imagine that she's not medicated. | ||
| That doesn't make any sense to me. | ||
| Something's going on. | ||
| If she isn't medicated, she's a psycho. | ||
| Right, something's wrong. | ||
| If she's not medicated, she's got a blown fuse. | ||
|
unidentified
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But also, that's how cars catch fire like that. | |
| No, that's insane. | ||
| Yeah, no, I, uh... | ||
| What is this guy saying? | ||
|
unidentified
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Her erratic behavior. | |
| Are you having a hard day? | ||
| I'm sorry. | ||
| Well, there we go. | ||
| Now we're assholes. | ||
| Well, unless she's making it up. | ||
| She might be making it up, but she might be telling the truth, which makes sense, where you're like, your whole world is like, what is life? | ||
| I'm gonna die real soon, and they can't fix this, and you're just, the car's fucking up, and you don't even care. | ||
| That could be it. | ||
| The patch is open, and you don't even care. | ||
| Your world is over. | ||
| Or you're like, oh shit, I fucked up. | ||
| Let me say something to get out of it right now. | ||
| You're a cynic. | ||
| I am an optimist. | ||
| I look for the good in people. | ||
| I did a show once when I was younger, and when you start, I guess I still have dark jokes, but I'm having some joke about SIDS, you know, the sudden infant death. | ||
| And I was doing it, it was like some pizza shop in my hometown, in an audience, and one person in the audience looked really upset. | ||
| And I go, what? | ||
| You don't like the joke? | ||
| And they were like, our kid died of SIDS. And I immediately went into like, when you were starting out, I just went into the oldest, safest material. | ||
| I'm like, so I'm broke. | ||
| Anyone else overdraft? | ||
| I just go right into it. | ||
| Panic. | ||
| And then at the end, I went up to him and her and I apologized. | ||
| And he was like, oh, we're just joking. | ||
| I was like, that's the worst heckle ever. | ||
| Oh, that's so mean. | ||
| But I stopped doing that kind of joke afterwards because, like, it's fine to do those kind of jokes, but you have to be prepared. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I was not prepared. | ||
| Like, I don't want to upset people like that, so I just stopped doing it. | ||
| Especially someone who lost their kid. | ||
| Right, so I was like, I can't do those jokes. | ||
| Like, I'm not against someone doing those. | ||
| Like, that's like Anthony Jesselmeck. | ||
|
unidentified
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No, no, no, of course. | |
| He has a shit ton of jokes like that. | ||
| Of course, yeah. | ||
| They're great. | ||
| People enjoy it. | ||
| It's not bad. | ||
| It's not bad comedy. | ||
| It's like, but... | ||
| At least with a guy like Jeselnik, you should know what you're getting into. | ||
| And don't try to pretend there's something wrong with what he's saying, but all these other people don't have a problem with it. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| It's a taste thing. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| But when you start out, no one knew who I was at their pizza shop in Bloomington, Indiana. | ||
| That's why it's so dangerous. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But the only way they're going to find out that's the kind of stuff you do is if you take those risks and do that kind of stuff and get in trouble. | ||
| You got to do it. | ||
| You got to get in trouble. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| I mean, thank God I started before people filmed stuff. | ||
| How many years are you in now? | ||
| 17. Okay, that's great. | ||
| That's great. | ||
| I've said horrible shit, but it's not on film. | ||
| But you also got in, I think... | ||
| The filming thing is fucking strange, right? | ||
| Because some people want to get filmed because you can get some clips like interacting with the audience. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But it's like you have to have an opportunity to work out stuff. | ||
| Of course, yeah. | ||
| Because there's times when you're on stage and you're saying things and you have a new bit and you don't know where you're taking it while you're taking it. | ||
| Of course, yeah. | ||
| And you have to, like... | ||
| That's why when they Luke the Louie thing... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It was... | ||
| Any comic who, like, criticized him should lose their comedian badge right away. | ||
| They have to me, yeah. | ||
| If you release something when they weren't planning on it, it doesn't matter what they said in it. | ||
| You're at fault for releasing something, you know? | ||
| Well, it's... | ||
| Obviously, as an audience member that released it, but the comics had criticized him. | ||
| Like, hey, man, fuck... | ||
| You. | ||
| First of all, the guy didn't do comedy for ten months. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And then second, the stuff that he was saying, if you know him and you know his act, and I guarantee you fucking do, because a lot of those people are just haters. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| If you know him, you know, given enough time, he would make that horrible premise really fucking funny. | ||
|
unidentified
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Yes! | |
| And frankly, it was pretty funny then. | ||
| Pretty funny then. | ||
| I mean, it was horrible that he was saying, like, push the fat kid in front of you. | ||
|
unidentified
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But that's funny! | |
| But you don't think there would be layers upon layers that would make that joke brilliant in a year if you just let him do it? | ||
| And you learn the cushions. | ||
| Yes! | ||
| People like Louis, the great comics, are great at learning how to make a hard joke work. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And he hadn't maybe developed the cushions yet on stage, but they would have come. | ||
| He hadn't done any comedy at all in ten months. | ||
| Yeah, no. | ||
| So this is like literally the first set he did. | ||
| I think anyone who criticized him about that was the kind of comedian who doesn't take risks. | ||
| Because if you take any risks, you wouldn't want stuff to be released. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| And if you understand how jokes are developed. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| There's too many people that got into it from something else, and they did stand-up in the beginning, and then they got into it again, they considered themselves stand-ups, and then they'll come out and criticize something like this. | ||
| And you go, just shut the fuck up, man. | ||
| You're not even doing it, right? | ||
| Yeah, you're not. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You're not even doing it right. | ||
| Like, you saying that this is bad, like, come on, man. | ||
| This is how everybody creates material. | ||
| You have to, yeah. | ||
| Once he puts it on a special, then you can judge it. | ||
| Once he decides. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| But until then, yeah, work on it, you know? | ||
| Imagine if my SIDS joke was filmed. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| I'd probably get into some Notre Dame back then. | ||
| Well, now on Twitter, you'd become a hero. | ||
| Yeah, but no one knows about it except for me bringing it up right now. | ||
| Except for all your listeners. | ||
| It's like you've got to have a place where you can fuck around, and that's the problem with filming all the time. | ||
| Because there's things that you'll start a bit off when you first start writing it and start making it. | ||
| It's so different than when it finishes. | ||
| You've got to be able to find that. | ||
| And not have people see it. | ||
| Yeah, not have people see it. | ||
| Comedy is like you want people to see the finished product, but it's embarrassing until then. | ||
| You're sweating. | ||
| You're sweaty. | ||
| You're working shit out. | ||
| You're stumbling. | ||
| You're bombing. | ||
| You don't want people to see that part. | ||
| Well, it's fun to watch as an audience member, though. | ||
| One of my favorite things is watching a bit develop. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| Watching someone come up with an initial premise, and maybe they come in the green room, we're all brainstorming, trying to figure out what part is... | ||
| Where does it get clunky? | ||
| It's interesting. | ||
| To me, it's all a mystery how it develops. | ||
| I think about... | ||
| I listen to tapes. | ||
| But when you just keep doing it, it just naturally edits itself. | ||
| It's an interesting mystery where it naturally forms. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| As long as you're not rigid. | ||
| Yes, yes. | ||
| And listen to it all. | ||
| Yeah, because some people are rigid. | ||
| And this is a problem that open micers have in beginning comics, is they started doing a bit a very certain way, so they're kind of comfortable saying it that way. | ||
| And they're uncomfortable on stage already. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So they keep saying it the same way. | ||
| That's the death of comics. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| One of the things Louie taught me, or not taught me, but something I understood, but he really articulated it, is like, the enemy of comedy is roteness. | ||
| Figuring out that you... | ||
| Once you think you can say it a certain way where it gets a laugh, it's dead. | ||
| Like, if you're relying on to just say it that way to get a laugh. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| And he made it clear, like, you really... | ||
| And he shows it. | ||
| You really got to think about the emotion behind it, which you forget immediately after a while. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I fall into this trap all the time where I figure out a way to say a joke and it gets a laugh. | ||
| And I think the minute you're 100% sure it's going to work, that's when it starts dying. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I know what you're saying. | ||
| I think what you're saying is that it has to be real in your mind at that moment. | ||
| You can't be just reading a script. | ||
| Yeah, to me it's like instead of... | ||
| Thinking of like, oh, I'm saying something now that will get a laugh. | ||
| Just trying to think of the anger or the sadness or whatever. | ||
| Why? | ||
| What is upsetting you or making you laugh hysterically about the subject? | ||
| That's why Bill Burr is so great because it's like, he doesn't look like he's trying to get people to laugh. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| He just looks really angry. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that's funny. | ||
| He is. | ||
| If you talk to Bill in the green room, that's the same guy. | ||
| If I fucking told him. | ||
| Yeah, and that's what's hilarious. | ||
| Just kind of like, the fact he's so great at... | ||
| Keeping that anger. | ||
| I don't know if it's an act. | ||
| I mean, keeping that anger alive through all these shows. | ||
| It's not an act. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's not an act. | |
| He's a psychiatrist. | ||
| You can call him right now. | ||
| Bring up something that annoys. | ||
| Listen to you. | ||
| You know what my favorite is? | ||
| When he's on a podcast with someone and they take themselves seriously. | ||
| He was on with Bill Maher and he was just chewing Bill Maher up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then he was on Charlamagne Tha God and he was chewing him up. | |
| I love it. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| He's the best at that. | ||
| Yeah, he's the king. | ||
| He's amazing. | ||
| He's the best at breaking down, yeah, look at you. | ||
| He's just breaking you down. | ||
| And you're like, oh no, he knows me. | ||
| He's just roasting you with that voice. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, he knows me. | |
| He knows me. | ||
| No, he's amazing. | ||
| Yeah, I just think his ability to just always be himself on stage, which I think that's the comedy I love the most. | ||
| He has a unique talent for it. | ||
| A unique talent for anything he's talking about. | ||
| It's just being himself. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, that's incredible. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's so interesting to see how so many people do it differently, but we all have something in common. | ||
| And I think one thing that everybody has in common is the best ones are really thinking about what they're talking about. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Really. | ||
| Really? | ||
| And having to care about it. | ||
| I feel like so many times I'll do a bit, and it's not working, and then I realize, I don't give a shit about the thing I'm saying. | ||
| If it's important to me, it'll be important to the audience. | ||
| Yeah, I have to bail on bits when I'm bored with them. | ||
| I know, because you're like, I don't really care about this. | ||
| I'm not actually angry. | ||
| People are like, yeah, there's something there. | ||
| I'm like, I know, but right now I don't give a fuck about it, so I have to leave it alone for a little bit. | ||
| If you don't give a fuck about it, they can tell. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's some bits that killed when I first started doing them, and then they got a little flat. | ||
| And I was like, what is going on here? | ||
| Oh, I don't care anymore. | ||
| You don't care. | ||
| You don't care. | ||
| And you know they work. | ||
| There's no mystery. | ||
| It's also I didn't find out whatever it is in the bit that makes it a great bit. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Sometimes you just can't find a thing that elevates it from an eight. | ||
| It stays at an eight. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| It never hits a 10. Sometimes you keep them in if they make a point, if they're bizarrely ironic or there's something about it where you're like, it's worth it, even though it's not the funniest joke. | ||
| Little hills and valleys. | ||
| With the hour, it works well. | ||
| Yeah, with an hour. | ||
| But sometimes you just got to set it aside and then sometimes I'll come back to it. | ||
| I have a whole folder that I call orphaned babies, and it's all bits that never made it on anything. | ||
| That's great to keep a record. | ||
| That's a great thing to do. | ||
| You have to. | ||
| That's the hardest part, forgetting everything. | ||
| I forget them sometimes when a friend brings them up. | ||
| What about the hyena thing? | ||
| I fucking forgot that. | ||
| I'm like that. | ||
| How does it go? | ||
| People bring that up like, oh yeah, why did I stop doing that joke and then I'll stop doing it again? | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's weird. | ||
| It's tough. | ||
| I did a release an hour a couple months ago, and so I'm trying to work out a new hour. | ||
| It's tough when you have that, because there's a lot of jokes you just probably don't care about that much, but you need it in there just for the... | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| It's like scaffolding, you know? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Right, to keep the bits together so they're coherent sometimes. | ||
| But in my head, I'm like, ugh. | ||
| I think everybody should have a folder. | ||
| Everybody should write. | ||
| I know everybody likes to write on stage, and I get it, and there's some of the greats that write on stage. | ||
| But if you're listening, if you're not those people, everybody else, you should write. | ||
| Yeah, because you can go back and not forget them. | ||
| I have a whole... | ||
| Bookshelf looks like Seven, you know, where he has all the notebooks? | ||
| That's great. | ||
| It's all just, you know, crazy manifestos and jokes. | ||
| I think that's, it's like one of the things that I found when I had to do this live special was that I had to really go over my shit, like with a fine tooth comb. | ||
| So I wound up writing out all my bits that I've done hundreds of times. | ||
| Write them out exactly, word for word, just drill it into my head. | ||
| And then I was preparing for this, I was like, I should probably be doing this all the time. | ||
| I should probably be doing not just when I'm getting ready for a special, but I should probably be doing comedy this way. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's like whatever I've done late night, I start really analyzing the jokes and cutting them and be like, oh, if I did this all the time, I'd be pretty good. | ||
| That word does not work there, but it's just because I'm doing it on late nights. | ||
| So I'm like, but then normally I'm like, whatever. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's funny. | ||
| We have our own schedule. | ||
| We get to govern ourselves, which is not always the best thing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because if we were like a prodigy and you were a violin coach, I'd make you practice all day, bitch. | ||
| I know, but you can only technically practice on stage. | ||
| That's the weird thing. | ||
| You can, but you can prepare off stage. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, no, I think it's really important to write everything down and go back to it so you don't lose anything. | ||
| You can forget things. | ||
| Especially as you get older. | ||
| I have a bunch of friends that just keep things in their head. | ||
| Duncan, I'm pretty sure he released this bit so I could say, he might not have fucked. | ||
| He's got a great bit about Adderall. | ||
| I released my SIDS bit. | ||
| You can do it. | ||
| No, but I don't know. | ||
| I think he recorded a special, but I don't know if it's on it, so I don't want to say it. | ||
| But he's got this great Adderall bit. | ||
| He totally forgot about it. | ||
| And I said, how does it go? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I go, you say it like he's like, oh my god, that joke's amazing. | |
| I go, it's your joke. | ||
| You forgot it. | ||
| You got it, yeah. | ||
| It's important to be organized. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| We govern ourselves, and we're all slackers. | ||
| It's a weird job because it's just you. | ||
| Even advice doesn't typically work because every comedian, when they give advice, they're really just giving it that works for them. | ||
| And you don't know if it works for your voice or how you... | ||
| So you're just alone and you have to create your own system. | ||
| Advice, as long as it's not rigid, is really good. | ||
| Because you really can't tell people how to do things. | ||
| No. | ||
| And if anything, I mean, there's some good advice. | ||
| I mean, when I started out, I got a couple, you know, look around the audience, keep the mic out of the mic set. | ||
| Oh, yeah, standard stuff. | ||
| But, like, once you get into real advice, I don't know. | ||
| I think it just gets in your head for the most part, you know? | ||
| Sometimes it's good and sometimes it's terrible. | ||
| You know, I got a lot of terrible advice when I first started out. | ||
| What's a good advice? | ||
| Good advice is write a lot, listen to your recordings. | ||
| That was one thing, this guy Mike Donovan. | ||
| I got real lucky that I started out in Boston in the 80s, and there was all these local headliners that were awesome. | ||
| I mean, world class, but they were local, and they stayed local. | ||
| And one of them was this guy, Mike Donovan. | ||
| And Mike Donovan, he always had a... | ||
| This was back in the day when you had cassette recorders that were big, like a fucking box of cigars. | ||
| And he would sit it on the thing and press record when he went on stage. | ||
| He goes, you never know. | ||
| He goes, you might have a new tagline in that moment. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| And then you'll forget about it if you don't listen. | ||
| And that was some of the best advice I'd ever heard. | ||
| He was like the first comic recording of sets. | ||
| He was just a smart dude. | ||
| And he just figured out that you got to do that. | ||
| Yeah, I think that advice is great. | ||
| Definitely writing a lot and definitely listening to your sets is so important because there's so many comics that go up all the time, but they're delusional and they don't get better because they're not realizing that it's not working. | ||
| Yeah, you've got to analyze yourself like a hater. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| But stuff about how to say shit and all that, or your style, some of that, I feel like you're kind of alone a little. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| Because imagine someone like Bill Burr trying to give advice to Mitch Hedberg. | ||
| Just fucking yell the bitch. | ||
| Get mad. | ||
| Think about it. | ||
| What the fuck were you thinking about? | ||
| Get mad about the rice. | ||
| Get mad that there's so many rice. | ||
| I mean, at a certain point in time. | ||
| That's one of the... | ||
| I've been thinking about doing this for quite a while now. | ||
| We've talked about it. | ||
| I think we're going to do it. | ||
| And what I want to do is have... | ||
| Outside of podcasts, to just have an interview with headliners when they come into town and tell me about what happened. | ||
| Tell me about your journey. | ||
| What was your first open mic? | ||
| What was it like? | ||
| How'd you feel? | ||
| How'd you get started? | ||
| Did someone influence you? | ||
| Did someone ask you to do it? | ||
| I love it. | ||
| What were your first road gigs? | ||
| Just not a podcast where it'd be me talking about my stories, but just like I always want to know 100% an interview. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| A conversation, but an interview. | ||
| And just, you know, so that it's archived for comics. | ||
| Because you remember, like, when you were starting, I mean, 17 years ago, right? | ||
| You could get a couple of books. | ||
| There was a few books. | ||
| Richard Belzer had a book on stand-up, but it was kind of like tongue-in-cheek. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| The comedy bible for that woman. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| But there was nothing written by anybody who was really good. | ||
| No. | ||
| So that was part of the problem. | ||
| Belzer was good. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| But nothing written by, like, a George Carlin or a Richard Pryor or, you know, a Lenny Bruce. | ||
| It's never advice from the great... | ||
| It's always some weird person, some, like... | ||
| Kind of grifty. | ||
| Yeah, it's grifty. | ||
| And someone will be like, what? | ||
| You're not a comedian. | ||
| Well, we thought about doing that at the store back in the day. | ||
| We were talking about doing comedy classes where a comic, like a headliner, would come in. | ||
| And I know Ari did this quite a few times. | ||
| Ari did it in Phoenix when I was there. | ||
| He set up a seminar for free for all the local comics. | ||
| Told them, this is how you get a manager. | ||
| This is how you get an agent. | ||
| This is how you get stage time. | ||
| This is what you should do to organize your set. | ||
| And fucking amazing resource for free. | ||
| He did it for like two and a half hours. | ||
| Oh, that's awesome. | ||
| So Ari was doing that for a while. | ||
| But there's nothing like that for comics coming up. | ||
| Everybody has to learn from the people at the clubs. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| No, that's a good... | ||
| I would love to hear that stuff. | ||
| Because if you could start out now, and you can go on YouTube, first of all, you have access to everything. | ||
| Red Fox, Rodney Dangerfield, fucking everything that's ever been is online. | ||
| Lenny Bruce. | ||
| You watch Lenny Bruce recordings right now. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It was impossible to find that shit when we started. | ||
| No. | ||
| Impossible. | ||
| It's still impossible to understand, but... | ||
| Yeah, a lot of it, right? | ||
| I listened to him, I'm like, I don't... | ||
| It was a different time where saying Yiddish was really, like, hip. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Lenny? | ||
| Yeah, you know, the Meshuggana guys on the street. | ||
| Well, the thing about Lenny was that no one had ever talked like that publicly. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So this was a totally unique thing that you have to take in the context of 1963. Some of the most groundbreaking stuff feels the most dated later, because it is so groundbreaking that everyone, the model changed. | ||
| The whole world changed the way they think about things, and then talking about things openly the way he did became normal. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| So he's doing normal things to us. | ||
| But it seems, yeah. | ||
| No, it's like that musical Oklahoma seems like such a standard thing. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But at the time it was super experimental. | ||
| It was the first one where they had like not a chorus on stage right away or someone singing and a narrative. | ||
| Like musicals before that were reviews. | ||
| And you're like, I switched to musicals. | ||
| You're like, go back to comedy. | ||
| No, musicals are cool. | ||
| I love musicals. | ||
| But it was groundbreaking at the time. | ||
| A narrative story. | ||
| Most shit before that was reviews, and they broke a lot of rules. | ||
| But now it's just Oklahoma. | ||
| But it was an experimental thing at the time. | ||
| Like The Wizard of Oz. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The Wizard of Oz was monumental when it came out. | ||
| It was something that everybody saw. | ||
| It was one movie that you would guarantee everybody you talked to had seen The Wizard of Oz. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, it is the most watched movie. | ||
| I read a book about the making recently. | ||
| It was interesting. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Did you know that... | ||
| So, Judy Garland was groped by a lot of the little people on the movie. | ||
| It's like a whole thing. | ||
| She got groped. | ||
| And I read it. | ||
| Apparently, they were mad. | ||
| All the little people were very drunk and wild. | ||
| You know? | ||
| And they were mad because apparently they were getting paid less than Toto, the dog. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| So the hierarchy on Wizard of Oz was like the dog, little people, and then women at the bottom, you know? | ||
| And they were like groping her and she couldn't say anything about it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Isn't it insane? | ||
| I wish they could make a move. | ||
| That's also like, what year was that? | ||
| 1939? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bro, people were savages back then. | |
| Savage. | ||
| The director, Victor Fleming, slapped Judy Garland in the face during a scene. | ||
| Just slapped her because she couldn't keep a straight face. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Oh no. | ||
| I wish I could make a movie about the making of Wizard of Oz and that would show the beauty of the movie but also how horrible behind the scenes were. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because you had the witch Caught on fire and literally lost feeling in her hand at one point. | ||
| And then they forced her to go back to Margaret, what her name is. | ||
| They forced her to go back to work the next day, even though she was in the hospital. | ||
| The original guy playing the Tin Man got really sick because of the paint they were using. | ||
| He ended up in the hospital and they just replaced him immediately. | ||
| Yeah, he got really sick. | ||
| Yeah, no, it's like a... | ||
| Oh, that makes sense. | ||
| Like, what the fuck is that stuff they put on his skin? | ||
| There's no regulation back then. | ||
| They're just like, let's try this. | ||
| Also, they had just got done with, like, think about, that was like thalidomide babies back then, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Or that was actually later. | ||
| Thalidomide babies. | ||
| Wasn't that, like, in the 60s? | ||
| But they had the girls that developed cancer because they were using the loom for the watches. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| What was that called? | ||
| Radium girls? | ||
| Radium girls, yeah. | ||
| It was horrific. | ||
| Holes in their face and shit. | ||
| Their tongues would rot out of their mouths. | ||
| There was zero. | ||
| Nobody told them anything because they would lick the tip of their brush because they were doing these very delicate loom dials on watches. | ||
| No, no one gave a shit. | ||
| And in Hollywood, the stars were beginning to have power, but Judy Garland, she was just treated like she was owned by them. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like to slap. | ||
| Imagine the doctor trying to slap Emma Stone now. | ||
| Crazy. | ||
| It's just crazy to think that that wasn't that long ago. | ||
| I know. | ||
| And the Holocaust also happened not too soon after. | ||
| But isn't it kind of like watching tape and listening to tape as a comic? | ||
| Because you don't know how bad you suck until you see it. | ||
| And people didn't know how bad that kind of behavior was until you see it. | ||
| Go to the old James Cagney movies. | ||
| He'd smack his girlfriend right in the face. | ||
| And he was the hero. | ||
| And then they'd kiss each other. | ||
| Nuts! | ||
| I love watching old stuff to see the problematic parts. | ||
| I just find them really funny. | ||
| You ever see the one where it's like an old western and the guy is spanking his wife and the kid comes along and says, I know why you're spanking mommy. | ||
| It's because you love her. | ||
| And he's like, that's right, son. | ||
| It's so nuts. | ||
| The woman is over the guy's knees and he's spanking her. | ||
| It's out of love. | ||
| You know? | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This is like something that someone thought you could pass off in a movie. | ||
| I mean, that's how confused we were about narratives and about reality. | ||
| Well, every 80s movie, people are like, you gotta watch this. | ||
| Here it is. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, my God. | |
| It's John Wayne. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, my God. | |
| Thanks. | ||
| He's beating her. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God, that's awful. | |
| This is not the one where the guy, the wife... | ||
| I mean, he's beating her with a piece of metal. | ||
| And what a great show. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| What a great movie. | ||
| I love when they give him the weapon to use. | ||
| And he's like, thank you. | ||
| Yeah, normal. | ||
| Yeah, normal. | ||
| Beat her with a weapon. | ||
| Don't use your hand. | ||
| What if your hand gets hurt? | ||
| Well, every 80s movie, they're like, you gotta watch this 80s movie. | ||
| It's a classic. | ||
| Then you turn it on. | ||
| It's like 12 nerves gang raping a woman. | ||
| It's like every 80s comedy is like a prank. | ||
| What is this one? | ||
| And he spanks her too? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So he's carrying her away. | ||
| Look, he's spanking her. | ||
| In front of everybody. | ||
| Look at them watching. | ||
| What a spanking live back then. | ||
| This is so crazy. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| Not just spanking, but spanking in public. | ||
| Not just, like, he's holding her up in the air while he's spanking her. | ||
| And they're laughing. | ||
| Like, they think it's wonderful. | ||
| Look. | ||
| He's going to fuck her later. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Good for you. | |
| He just drops her. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God. | |
| They're just laughing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I've never been so proud of you in all. | |
| What the fuck? | ||
| I've never been so proud. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Come around and see me in the morning, son. | |
| You start to work at 10. Oh, they both have black eyes. | ||
| And he's got his arm around her. | ||
| Oh, sweetie, I got the job! | ||
| What the fuck is that movie about? | ||
| We just look evil when we look back in the past. | ||
| And we're just like, slap! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Spank her! | |
| Spank her! | ||
| And by the way, they thought they were so sophisticated because they were comparing themselves to fucking cave people. | ||
| Of course, yeah. | ||
| Well, we change. | ||
| We move at our own pace. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And so we had to look at the cave pain. | ||
| He's going, that is kind of fucked up that you stabbed that guy with a spear. | ||
| I remember that. | ||
| It goes from that to movies and plays, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, we're getting better. | ||
| It's just slow. | ||
| My cousin had a bat mitzvah. | ||
| It was reformed. | ||
| That's where you do the whole service in English, and you have to read part of the Bible, which in conservative you do in Hebrew, but in reform you do in English. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| Why reform? | ||
| They're just more liberal, more accessible. | ||
| It's usually like a lesbian rabbi, and she's eating out her girlfriend on stage and stuff. | ||
| And there's like the cantors tuning a guitar. | ||
| And she had to read a part of the Bible, but Reformed do it in English. | ||
| So the 13-year-old girl had to go on stage in front of everyone and read the selected part. | ||
| And not every part of the Bible holds up. | ||
| So it was like 300 people, her parents behind her. | ||
| And she's just on stage. | ||
| She has to open to the part. | ||
| And she's just like... | ||
|
unidentified
|
When a slave offends you, you cut off his right arm. | |
| And then her parents are behind her and they're like, that's my girl. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And then she's like, when you offend them again, you execute them. | |
| These are the laws of how to punish your slaves. | ||
| And we're all just like in the back. | ||
| Is that a real quote? | ||
| Yeah, or something like that. | ||
| Yeah, something close to that. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| And that's why you do it in Hebrew, so you don't have to... | ||
|
unidentified
|
So you can pretend it's okay. | |
| That's why we do it in Hebrew. | ||
| You don't know what they're talking about. | ||
| Well, that was the whole thing about them doing it in Latin, right? | ||
| Like, nobody could speak Latin. | ||
| So they could tell them whatever. | ||
| And take the priest's word for it. | ||
| It says, give me $100 if you want to be in the afterlife. | ||
| I think there was a lot of that going on. | ||
| That's why everybody wanted to kill Martin Luther. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Yeah, the Latin, that was a big con. | ||
| Huge con. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Nobody speaks it. | ||
| Yeah, only we know what it's saying. | ||
| The priest was like, kid, it's saying to suck my dick right now. | ||
| Isn't it nuts? | ||
| Isn't it nuts that that is kind of a dead language? | ||
| Like, you could still learn Latin, but nobody speaks Latin. | ||
| No, unless you're getting possessed by the devil. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Don't forget that demographic. | ||
| Oh yeah, those folks. | ||
| Well, they usually talk in tongues. | ||
| They're not even doing Latin. | ||
| They're going... | ||
|
unidentified
|
They don't throw in Latin? | |
| Do they occasionally? | ||
| I feel like the exorcist... | ||
| I feel like she throws in a little Latin. | ||
| She said, your mother sucks cocks in hell. | ||
| Which, by the way... | ||
| Super English. | ||
| I don't understand why anyone's scared of that movie. | ||
| That movie's hilarious. | ||
| That's because you're younger than me. | ||
| I know, yeah. | ||
| When I was a boy, that movie was fucking terrifying. | ||
| I saw that movie, I was real young. | ||
| Like, I probably shouldn't have been able to see it. | ||
| Like, what year did that movie come out? | ||
| 75? | ||
|
unidentified
|
75? | |
| 73. Okay. | ||
| Tried to be Rain Man. | ||
| So I was 6. Yeah. | ||
| Well, you should have been seeing the movie anyway. | ||
| I saw that movie when I was 6. Yeah. | ||
| My parents let me see all the scary movies. | ||
| Can I ask you this? | ||
| Did you at the time, I was telling them about it backstage, did you believe in the devil? | ||
| Kinda? | ||
| Oh yeah, sure. | ||
| Cause I'm a Jew. | ||
| I'm like a heathen Jew, right? | ||
| We don't believe in the devil. | ||
| So for me, it just felt like funny. | ||
| It's a good fucking movie, man. | ||
| But it's just like, she's like, saying like, your mom sucks cocks in hell, that's like, to a priest, that's definitively funny. | ||
| Well, how about when she fucks herself with the cross? | ||
| I just don't... | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It's just like... | ||
| She said some wild shit while she was doing it, too. | ||
| Like, fuck my cunt. | ||
| Something like that. | ||
| But that's like... | ||
| I guess back then, the idea of a kid cursing was like... | ||
| Oh, it's crazy. | ||
| But now it's South Park. | ||
| You want to talk about someone that got fucked up from doing a movie? | ||
| She got really fucked up from doing these... | ||
| Imagine, okay? | ||
| You're a young girl, and you are literally playing the devil. | ||
| Everybody knows you. | ||
| You're famous now. | ||
| And you're famous for being the fucking devil. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| So everywhere you go, people are scared of you. | ||
| People see you on the street. | ||
| You fucked yourself with a crucifix in a movie. | ||
| You're like 13, people are walking by, suck cocks in hell! | ||
| Jesus Christ, you probably never heard the end of it, and that was another movie that everybody saw. | ||
| Yeah, that was, yeah, I just, I love horror movies, but I find that one, it's like, I just don't find it... | ||
| I feel like a girl... | ||
| I mean, at the time, I get it was scary. | ||
| Definitely if you're six. | ||
| But I just find it silly. | ||
| It's just like you're telling the priest to go fuck himself. | ||
| This is funny. | ||
| I get it, but I think it's because we are living in 2024. We're heathens now. | ||
| And all those movies have gone on, and we've learned from those movies. | ||
| Which is interesting to think that back then at Kid Cursing, we were so much more puritanical. | ||
| That was disturbing. | ||
| Disturbing. | ||
| And now it's South Park. | ||
| Yeah, it's totally normal. | ||
| Now they're sticking things up their butts in cartoons. | ||
| Yeah, it's totally normal now. | ||
| And that's again, it's like going back to listen to Lenny Bruce stuff and then trying to listen to... | ||
| He had one joke that comics inadvertently stole because they didn't realize that they were stealing it. | ||
| Because it was so brilliant. | ||
| But it was when homosexuality was illegal back then. | ||
| And he goes, being gay is illegal, dig? | ||
| What do they do when they catch you? | ||
| They put you in jail with a bunch of guys who want to have sex with you. | ||
| This is a great joke. | ||
| He has great jokes. | ||
| It's just... | ||
| If you went back in time to the 1950s and talked to people, they would think you were a fucking alien. | ||
| Like, who is this guy? | ||
| How is he talking so freely about things? | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| And he did have great jokes. | ||
| You just gotta get past the dig and the meshuganas. | ||
| He had great jokes. | ||
| That book of his is awesome. | ||
| The one of his transcripts. | ||
| Do you look at that? | ||
| No. | ||
| It's like just that writing. | ||
| Of the trials? | ||
| No, just of the stand-up. | ||
| Oh, the stand-up. | ||
| It's awesome. | ||
| You see it all in like... | ||
| He had one bit that was like... | ||
| I love Bill Hicks. | ||
| He's one of my favorites. | ||
| But it was similar to a Bill Hicks joke. | ||
| Not to say Bill Hicks stole from it, but they're just great minds think alike about like... | ||
| If Jesus came back, would you want to see a cross? | ||
| Something similar to that. | ||
| A bunch of guys had that, though. | ||
| Yeah, but he might have been the first. | ||
| Yeah, he probably was the first. | ||
| I mean, Kennison had something kind of similar to that, too. | ||
| I listened to Bill Hicks recently. | ||
| He got me into comedy. | ||
| I always loved him. | ||
| I listened to him on a road trip recently, and he holds up so well. | ||
| And I think the people call him preachy. | ||
| I think they're so wrong. | ||
| I actually think all his jokes are just good jokes. | ||
| That aren't really preachy for the most part. | ||
| See, I don't think it was preachy. | ||
| Like, I don't think Anthony Jeselnik is really offensive. | ||
| No. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Like, it's a style of comedy. | ||
| His style of comedy was condescending, I'm smarter than you, and here's some amazing points about life. | ||
| And so, I liked it. | ||
| I like that. | ||
| Hicks, you mean? | ||
| Yeah, Hicks. | ||
| Like when Hicks would talk about things, he would talk about things like, you know, everybody's stupid. | ||
| Like, this is why, and I'm telling you how it should be. | ||
| And that's what people didn't like about it. | ||
| But that was also a great way to get some of those points across. | ||
| Like, there were some points that that's really kind of the only way, if you want to deliver it the way he does it, it's really kind of the only way you can do it. | ||
| Well, it's also funny to see a crazy person on stage, just someone who's like, you know, that's hilarious. | ||
| Like, he is a funny character, and I do think he has great misdirects, like, just great jokes that go beyond, like, what ideology he's, like, you know, professing, you know? | ||
| You mean Hicks? | ||
| Hicks, yeah. | ||
| Well, he had... | ||
| Brilliant shit about the war. | ||
| They have sophisticated weapons. | ||
| How do you know? | ||
| We check the receipts. | ||
| Well, the whole book depository is very realistic. | ||
| Oswald isn't in it. | ||
| He just had great... | ||
| I just thought he had just... | ||
| Kind of like Woody Allen. | ||
| I know he loved Woody Allen. | ||
| Great misdirects. | ||
| And when you listen to it now, a lot of it... | ||
| It's kind of what a lot of good comedy is, where you take a hot-button issue, but then you just have a joke that's just kind of about something else. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| And that's really a lot of what his stuff is. | ||
| It just feels kind of like modern comedy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, he definitely changed a lot of people's idea of comedy because he made it kind of interesting for the first time. | ||
| He had interesting subjects. | ||
| Him and Doug's stand-up definitely were my big influences. | ||
| I loved you, too. | ||
| I loved your old... | ||
| I remember back when I listened to comedy albums. | ||
| That was a different era, I guess, you know? | ||
| Oh, wow, yeah. | ||
| But I remember I loved your bit about the tiger in the zoo, the monster in a box. | ||
| I still think about that every time I'm in a zoo, because they always make the cage look like they could possibly jump out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You remember that bit? | ||
| Yeah, I do. | ||
| I kind of remember it. | ||
| But I remember the story. | ||
| These kids threw pine cones at a tiger, and the tigers can jump 14 feet in a 12-foot cage. | ||
| They gave it like a little... | ||
| They didn't even put a roof on it. | ||
| This cage is secure unless a tiger gets really mad. | ||
| But when's that going to happen? | ||
| I would have given everything to see the look on their face when that thing touched the top of the bars. | ||
| Yeah, they were like... | ||
| When the paws hit the bars and the body starts going over, the flood of chemicals that must go into your mind... | ||
| That's a high! | ||
| Off the charts. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's a high. | |
| Probably like nothing else you'll ever experience in life. | ||
| That's like a cold plunge times 10,000. | ||
| Well, it's like undeniable. | ||
| You're dying right now. | ||
| It's coming for you. | ||
| It's a 600-pound super predator. | ||
| Well, one kid survived, right? | ||
| One kid survived. | ||
| I think the kid who threw the pine cones unfortunately survived. | ||
| I think his buddy got taken out. | ||
| Oh, that's how fierce tigers are. | ||
| I'm not gonna fuck you up. | ||
| I'm gonna fuck your friend up. | ||
| I think his buddy went to help him. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| I don't know the whole story. | ||
| I mean, who knows? | ||
| It was probably just chaos. | ||
| But I think about that bit every time at a zoo. | ||
| They always make it look like the tiger can jump out. | ||
| I'm like, why don't you just not make it look like that? | ||
| Put a roof on the box. | ||
| Monster on the box. | ||
| Keep the monster in. | ||
| Why don't you have a roof on the box? | ||
| If you have a monster in the city in a box, put a fucking roof on the box. | ||
| We don't need to make it look like it can jump out. | ||
| We don't need... | ||
| Also, how expensive is it to put a roof on? | ||
| Is it that expensive? | ||
| I think they want to make it feel like it's free. | ||
| Fuck that. | ||
| It's not free. | ||
| No, yeah. | ||
| They shouldn't be there. | ||
| I don't agree with zoos at all. | ||
| You don't like zoos? | ||
| No, I'm a hypocrite because I took my kids to them because I want my kids to be able to see these animals because it's kind of cool to see a two-year-old staring at a hippo. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa! | |
| Of course, yeah. | ||
| But the reality is they're prisons. | ||
| They're prisons for animals that didn't do anything wrong. | ||
| But it's a little different in the sense that their life outside of prison is pretty messed up. | ||
| They're just getting killed. | ||
| But it's natural. | ||
| It is natural. | ||
| They're not all getting killed. | ||
| They're doing some killing too, which is also unnatural that you just feed these things that live to kill. | ||
| I guess the zoo is better for the prey. | ||
| It's definitely bad. | ||
| Well, I used to have a joke about that, too. | ||
| About the only animal that I don't feel bad about in the zoo is giraffes. | ||
| They're having a great time. | ||
| They don't seem to have any problem with it at all. | ||
| Like, another day with no lions. | ||
| Well, it's like, yeah, if that's jail, like, freedom of them just getting chased by... | ||
| Like, if you were in prison and outside of prison, you could just get eaten at any time, prison wouldn't look so bad. | ||
| Well, as long as they have a big enough enclosure and they can walk around, they don't seem to have any problem with it. | ||
| Yeah, it sucks for the predators because they can't hunt. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| And then they always put the tiger next to the giraffe or the lion just to fuck with them. | ||
| Which is so crazy. | ||
| It's a little cruel. | ||
| You imagine being a tiger and you're like, I can't believe it. | ||
| Every day. | ||
| And then you forget because you have bad memories. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, he's right there. | |
| Fuck. | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| Cocksuckers. | ||
| Yeah, they're kind of cruel with that. | ||
| Put them in different places. | ||
| Well, you shouldn't put them there at all. | ||
| The whole thing's crazy. | ||
| I get it does protect some endangered species, but boy, I think if we really care about animals, we should put a lot more money into it and there should be a lot larger spaces and it shouldn't be anything remotely resembling a zoo. | ||
| And it's always weird who gets the big space. | ||
| At the Louisville Zoo, there's a wolf who just got fucking 12 acres and then a snow leopard's in a little diorama with a cage on it. | ||
| It's sick. | ||
| The way they do it in Africa is the way to do it. | ||
| If you really want to go see an animal, you should go on a fucking safari and drive through these areas where they're They're killing gazelles and they're doing normal lion shit. | ||
| This is a normal lion in a lion environment and you drive through it and it's probably dangerous as shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And keep your fucking windows rolled. | ||
| You know that lady from the Game of Thrones, one of the video, I think one of the video editors, one of the editors from the Game of Thrones got killed by a lion in one of those parks. | ||
| In the safari? | ||
| She rolled her window down and she was leaning out to take a photo or something. | ||
| The cat reached in and grabbed her. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| I saw one of those videos where the people in the car and like one of the, I think it's a tiger, not a tiger, it's Africa, but it was a lion coming up to the car and they're looking at it and the lion just opened the door. | ||
| Like he just put his paw on the door and opened it. | ||
| They're like, ah! | ||
| Lock the fucking door, man. | ||
| Imagine a little skinny-ass piece of window that you could put your head through easy, and there's a lion right outside of it. | ||
| He could put his head through it easily. | ||
| He doesn't know, but if he just fucking smashes his head, it'll go right through that thing. | ||
| He's a lion. | ||
| If he's just like crazy that day. | ||
|
unidentified
|
If he just decides to pop it with his paw, it's just gonna burst. | |
| Well, that's what's crazy about the tiger who killed the kid. | ||
| It's like, they were like... | ||
| He can't get out unless he really wants to. | ||
| It's like, don't protect it from him really wanting to as well. | ||
| Well, they didn't have the proper height fence. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| Not only did they not have a roof on it, the fence was two feet shy of what a tiger can jump over. | ||
| It was only a three-foot wall. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Leaping over a three-foot wall and out of its enclosure. | ||
| No, no, no, no, no, no, no. | ||
| They might have misunderstood when they wrote this article, but that's what this says. | ||
| I don't think that's correct. | ||
| I'm almost positive that it was 14 feet long. | ||
| The wall was 1.2 meters, 4 feet shorter than the recommended minimum. | ||
| But it was more than 3 feet. | ||
| I think it was 12 feet. | ||
| The hilarious one was actually 3 feet. | ||
| I'm like, whoa, what's the problem? | ||
| That's crazy that it's 4 foot shy. | ||
| I'm reading multiple articles. | ||
| This was also weird. | ||
| I thought it happened in 2011. This says it was 2008, so I'm kind of confused on that too. | ||
| Maybe there's more than one of those. | ||
| But this was the same person that died in both articles. | ||
| Oh, how weird. | ||
| They're trying to say they were on drugs. | ||
| Doesn't mean they deserve to die. | ||
| Three foot wall. | ||
| That's so crazy. | ||
| I could jump a three foot wall. | ||
| Oh yeah, that's not real. | ||
| I could try. | ||
| There's no way. | ||
| I could get you on the third try. | ||
| Yeah, you could probably at least get over the top of it. | ||
| There's no way it was, that's no, there's no way, that's this tall, that's crazy. | ||
| That would be hilarious if we just made it three feet. | ||
| They're like, he doesn't, you know. | ||
| From the San Francisco newspaper. | ||
| What does that one say? | ||
| A picture of what it was. | ||
| The wall. | ||
| Bro, that's pretty high. | ||
| It says, oh, the new glass wall makes it 19 feet. | ||
| The current wall used to be 12 feet. | ||
| So that's where it was, and the tiger jumped over that. | ||
| And now they gave him an extra 5 feet. | ||
| Fuck that place! | ||
| They said the tiger couldn't have made that jump in the distance. | ||
| They said it was too far. | ||
| It looks like it's built to have that tiger jump off that top part onto the thing. | ||
| It's like it's built so he can jump out. | ||
| Did they say the tiger jumped from the bottom or the tiger jumped from that top part? | ||
| The articles I was reading when it first happened, they weren't sure what the fuck happened. | ||
| They were like, it doesn't make sense that it happened. | ||
| They were like, someone must have helped it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| That's them covering their ass. | ||
| It is a little bit of that. | ||
| That's them covering their ass. | ||
| They know exactly what happened. | ||
| There was eyewitnesses. | ||
| People saw it happen. | ||
| Also, who could have helped it? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So that's what it looked like? | ||
| I guess that's the first picture I've seen of that. | ||
| Oh my god, imagine that thing coming over the top of that. | ||
| So that's the three-foot fence, I think, that they were saying. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| But wait, so if they're throwing pine... | ||
| Is this the pinecones thing? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So it had to be below if they're throwing pinecones. | ||
| No, it could be over there. | ||
| They could throw it over the ridge. | ||
| You think it got all the way to the... | ||
| Yeah, yeah, you could throw it that far. | ||
| That's not that far. | ||
| No? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| That looks like 15 yards max. | ||
| Let me see that again. | ||
| Let me see that photo again. | ||
| Yeah, that doesn't look that far, dude. | ||
| It's a big jump, though. | ||
| It's probably a big jump for a cat. | ||
| I don't know if he made the jump. | ||
| I think he made the jump from the bottom. | ||
| The one that was confusing said that it was basically in these bushes when they were standing on this rail throwing shit at it and then they got too close and found out there was one way closer than they thought. | ||
| That's not what I heard. | ||
| I know it doesn't make sense. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| What I had heard was the thing was over there, they were continuing to throw things at it, and it came towards them and jumped over the wall, which only makes sense. | ||
| Oh, eyewitness accounts, statements from the... | ||
| Here's already my confusion, though. | ||
| This is from 2011, and those last two articles were 2008. Hmm. | ||
| Well, maybe they didn't release the whole story until 2011. Yeah, there it is. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| So it's a lawsuit. | ||
| Yeah, they should fucking sue, for sure. | ||
| I mean, definitely you shouldn't throw pinecones at tigers. | ||
| They don't deserve to die. | ||
| You're a fucking kid. | ||
| You're a dumbass kid. | ||
| That could have been us. | ||
| If we were both 17, and I'd go, I dare you to throw a pinecone. | ||
| Come on, pussy. | ||
| It's just a pinecone. | ||
| To the dry moat to the top of the wall. | ||
| Wow. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| No, that's crazy. | ||
| From the bottom of the dry moat. | ||
| So they got into the bottom, yeah, like I thought. | ||
| Look at the victim blaming. | ||
| It was at the bottom of the thing. | ||
| I can't imagine jumping out unless it was provoked. | ||
| Yeah, but it shouldn't be able to jump out if it's provoked. | ||
| Yeah, that's so crazy. | ||
| You should have a backup plan for the tiger's emotions. | ||
| Yeah, also, why don't you have guards to make sure that someone doesn't do something like that? | ||
| The tiger can't get out as long as the tiger's chill. | ||
| Wow, followed someone's blood trail for about 300 yards where it resumed attacks. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Photos show blood-smeared asphalt where the tiger apparently dragged Sosa's body. | ||
| It found the blood trail. | ||
| The tiger would leave a kill to go after something else unless it were a compelling reason. | ||
| Oh my god, another victim blaming. | ||
| The tiger passed exhibits with warthogs, which it ignored as it followed the blood trail of the two brothers to the Terrace Cafe outside the dining area. | ||
| This is a real, what are they wearing? | ||
| What were they wearing? | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| That's exactly what it is. | ||
| They were high. | ||
| Or like when a black person gets killed and they try to vilify the black guy. | ||
| They're like, he was on drugs. | ||
| It's kind of like that. | ||
| They're like, he was high. | ||
| They should have provoked him. | ||
| It's like, you should have a cage where a tiger can't get out on any mood the tiger's in. | ||
| Whether he's happy or mad. | ||
| They should test every mood and see if he could jump out in any of the moods. | ||
| Also, what if it killed some old lady who was just there with her niece showing her around? | ||
| Who the fuck knows what could have happened? | ||
| You're just guessing. | ||
| And it didn't even kill the friend. | ||
| It didn't even kill the guy. | ||
| It killed the other guy. | ||
| I don't know who it killed. | ||
| Now I'm saying that. | ||
| I'm trying to remember. | ||
| But I bet it killed... | ||
| Yeah, it killed the younger of the three. | ||
| The other two were brothers that were not killed. | ||
| Who was the one that threw the pine cones? | ||
| Were they all throwing them? | ||
| I haven't found out. | ||
| It sucks that they know that that tiger was like... | ||
| Maybe they were all throwing pine cones. | ||
| Maybe I heard the story wrong. | ||
| Or the tiger was just clearly more annoyed by one of them. | ||
| Like one of them had a more annoying face. | ||
| It's whoever the fuck is closest. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| Who's closest? | ||
| Who's gonna get taken out first? | ||
| This thing has never had a chance to take out anything. | ||
| Yeah, it's a little... | ||
| I mean, the whole reason they exist is they are the cleanup crew for nature. | ||
| Anything that has a limp, anything that does something stupid, you go walking through the thick grass, that's a wrap. | ||
| That's what they're there for. | ||
| They're there for overpopulation. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Because they exist around deer. | ||
| Yeah, of course. | ||
| They exist around a very specific kind of deer. | ||
| It's called an axis deer. | ||
| And these deer move like lightning, dude. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You ever see the axis deer? | ||
| No, I don't think so. | ||
| They take off like it's crazy because they evolved around tigers. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So they just explode away so fast. | ||
| A lot of times you see those water buffalo moving, they seem to completely forget about tigers or lions until they jump out, and then they're like, oh shit, and then they all run away. | ||
| Not that many lions eat water buffaloes. | ||
| No? | ||
| They're so big, they're too dangerous. | ||
| You could get a broken jaw, broken leg, they stomp your head, you're dead. | ||
| But yeah, I agree that predators, it sucks for them in a zoo, but you never want to have a zoo as just prey. | ||
| That would kind of suck. | ||
| Reported that her claws were not frayed, suggesting that she made the 12-foot, 9-inch leap on her first attempt. | ||
| Oh my Dr. Dunker also reported that there was no disease or signs of trauma on the body other than bullet wounds for the cat. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Do you know there's one specific tribe of lions in Africa that does hunt water buffalo? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because they got stranded on an island? | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| The currents changed to this river, and these lions got stranded on this island that only has water buffalo. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| And so the female lions evolved to become much larger than normal female lions. | ||
| They look like Hulk lions. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| It's called relentless enemies. | ||
| Because they're the hunters, the females, right? | ||
| Yes, the females are the hunters. | ||
| So they got as big as male lions. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| So the female hunters, they're jacked, too. | ||
| Like, they look freakish because they have to take out water buffalo all the time. | ||
| Have you seen the video, the best nature video? | ||
| I mean, it's the one about the water buffaloes walking and the lion comes and they like... | ||
| It's like four lines and they never go after the big one. | ||
| It's always like four of them after like a baby water bottle or in like a wheelchair. | ||
| It's like, ah! | ||
| And they push him into the water and then a crocodile comes out of the water and grabs the water buffalo, the baby, and then the lions are like having a tug-of-war with like the crocodile. | ||
| It's like insane. | ||
| Have you seen that? | ||
| Yeah, I have seen that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But... | |
| The crocodiles are the ultimate cleanup crew. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| See if you can find that Relentless Enemies thing, because you've got to see what these female lions look like. | ||
| I can show it to us. | ||
| We always get in trouble. | ||
| Right, just show it to us. | ||
| Because these female lions, they don't even look real. | ||
| They look like CGI lions. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| They're super jacked. | ||
| So the female lions are normally smaller, but they are the hunter. | ||
| Yeah, they're the hunters. | ||
| But this documentary, Relentless Enemies, see if you can find one of the images of the jack. | ||
| Look at what she's built like. | ||
| Jeez. | ||
| She's built like a male. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| She's fucking huge. | ||
| Those arms are huge, yeah. | ||
| Huge. | ||
| Because they have to take out Water Buffalo. | ||
| She's like a female bodybuilder. | ||
| It's a great documentary, though. | ||
| Because it's just about nature adapting. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Look at the size of her. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| They're so much bigger. | ||
| And they have to be, because these fucking things are ruthless. | ||
| I mean, Water Buffalo are huge. | ||
| And they're tough as shit. | ||
| You can hang off them with their claws, and they don't even notice it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They always have bugs on them and they don't notice. | ||
| Fucking shit life. | ||
| Have you done a safari? | ||
| No. | ||
| My buddy McCabe, Dan McCabe, my friend, he did it and he sent me footage of a lion killing a prey. | ||
| Right in front of him? | ||
| Yeah, he just filmed it. | ||
| And they're in those open Jeeps? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| What's that about? | ||
| Yeah, let that shit up. | ||
| What is that about? | ||
| They just haven't figured out yet that they can get you? | ||
| People love... | ||
| It's like the zoo. | ||
| They love to have it all open. | ||
| They love to just, like, you know, push it as far as they can. | ||
| Bro, I want to be in an Iron Man suit with a chainmail gun. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| One of those chain guns. | ||
| I do not want to be... | ||
| I like how you said Iron Man suit, like it's a real thing. | ||
| If I had one... | ||
| Wait. | ||
| Those Iron Man suits? | ||
| What happened? | ||
| Power went out? | ||
| It's still recording over there. | ||
| Is the video recording? | ||
| The video's still, that's the only thing recording. | ||
| The video's the only thing recording? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Can we keep going, or should we stop? | ||
| Yeah, you can, there you keep. | ||
| Oh, there it goes again. | ||
| It's the hottest day of the year when I have that problem with the AC being overpowered, but yeah, I mean, I'll turn everything back on. | ||
| Is today the hottest day of the year? | ||
| So far, yeah, it's going to be 107. Oh, God. | ||
| I mean, we're still recording. | ||
| Really? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| The camera's shut off and on, too, though. | ||
| I don't know what to tell you. | ||
| The screen's still on. | ||
| Cameras are still on. | ||
| That's still moving. | ||
| Time's still going. | ||
| How hot is it today? | ||
|
unidentified
|
106, 107. God, it didn't feel like it. | |
| You ever be at a club where the lights... | ||
| I don't know what to do. | ||
| We might want to stop for like five minutes and make sure this doesn't keep happening while we have the opportunity before it fucks up more. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Your call. | ||
| But it's recording, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, but it's flickered four or five times. | |
| Right. | ||
| What could possibly happen? | ||
| It stops recording. | ||
| It flickered again. | ||
| Like, while we have a chance for it to stop, we might want to take a break. | ||
| That's all I'm saying. | ||
| Okay, we'll take a little pee break. | ||
| We'll come back, ladies and gentlemen and non-binary folk. | ||
| Now we're up? | ||
| Oh, we were just about to complain about the government. | ||
| Or whoever it is. | ||
| They're cracking down on our controversial takes on lines. | ||
| It's YouTube, man. | ||
| They're trying to ban free speech, man. | ||
| Yeah, I just got an update. | ||
| There's a local outage. | ||
| It's going to take two hours to get everybody else's power up. | ||
| We got lucky, I guess. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| I feel privileged. | ||
| Is it a brownout? | ||
| Is this one of them brownouts? | ||
| I got a notice for my house. | ||
| It says, Austin Energy outage may affect until 4.38 p.m. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's true. | |
| Texas has its own grid, which is great, until it's not. | ||
| I've read the articles. | ||
| Yeah, it got real close. | ||
| Apparently during the cold front, it got real close. | ||
| They were like 30 minutes away from losing the whole grid. | ||
| No, my best friend from here, Zach, and he was here when they had to melt the snow or whatever. | ||
| It just became like some crazy survival thing. | ||
| That was the first year we lived here. | ||
| No one knows how to drive in the snow. | ||
| It was hilarious. | ||
| Yeah, no, I remember that. | ||
| People with Corvettes spinning around in intersections? | ||
| No, he was melting snow. | ||
| Why was he melting? | ||
| They had to melt snow for something. | ||
| For what? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It was like that movie Alive. | ||
| They need water. | ||
| They melted snow for water? | ||
| It was for water, yeah. | ||
| Could be. | ||
| Pipes froze? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, that makes sense. | ||
| It was crazy, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, you gotta have some water, folks. | ||
| Keep some water in your house. | ||
| It's a good move. | ||
| If you're in a place that happens like that... | ||
| So if this happens in Boston, they know how to deal with snowy roads. | ||
| They fix things. | ||
| It's easy. | ||
| They plow. | ||
| Everything gets back online. | ||
| Any time they're snowed, it all shuts down for two weeks. | ||
| They don't have plows. | ||
| Like, hey guys, I've been here twice and it snowed. | ||
| How about buy a fucking plow? | ||
| Have one. | ||
| Yeah, I guess it just hasn't happened enough for them to, you know. | ||
| That's so stupid. | ||
| Yeah, I know. | ||
| I'm from Louisville, Kentucky. | ||
| It's kind of like that, too. | ||
| Whenever it snowed, it would shut down the whole city. | ||
| It's funny if you grew up in a place like... | ||
| I grew up in Boston, which is like snow is just normal. | ||
| It's just normal. | ||
| It's part of, oh, it's snowing out. | ||
| Did you even have... | ||
| Did school ever close? | ||
|
unidentified
|
It had to fucking snow for school to close. | |
| Closing school was such a fun experience. | ||
| It happened every time. | ||
| We did have them. | ||
| We did have snow days. | ||
| Because it did fucking snow. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| But in places like there, if it's just snowing a little, they'll let you go to school. | ||
| Go to school, bitch. | ||
| Was there anything better than a snow day? | ||
| It was so exciting. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, it was amazing. | |
| You got a day off. | ||
| I think I learned more in snow days than I did in any other day. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| And then you'd be watching the TV waiting for your county to be listed as the one that closed. | ||
| And you're like, fuck this. | ||
| Like, please, I can stay home and watch cartoons, please. | ||
| It was no greater joy than a snow day. | ||
| Oh, it was wonderful. | ||
| And now the snow sucks. | ||
| You hate it. | ||
| Someone should redesign school. | ||
| School's terrible. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's just the whole design of getting kids to sit down all day. | ||
| It's fucking terrible. | ||
| We wake them up at, like, farmer times. | ||
| Like, we wake them up. | ||
| I used to get up at, like, five in the morning like I was a farmer. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And your parents would just go back to bed. | ||
| They're like, we don't go. | ||
| They just get up, and then they go back to sleep. | ||
| I'd be on the bus at, like, five in the morning. | ||
| It was insane. | ||
| Terrible for kids. | ||
| And then they say we have ADD. We're fucking tired! | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Tired and bored. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And this thing you're doing in front of me sucks. | ||
| I got back to the Adderall thing, so I got addicted and I ended up... | ||
| What did you start off with? | ||
| How much were you taking in the beginning? | ||
| I think probably like 30 milligrams. | ||
| Right away? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| I think. | ||
| Maybe it was a little less. | ||
| Jimmy, you said 20 kept you up for two days? | ||
| Yeah, I mean, I'm not a user, but... | ||
| 20 was plenty for me. | ||
| I don't like how I said user like that. | ||
| Like, I'm not a user like this junkie. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't like how you said, I'm not a user. | |
| So you started off with 30s? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Did you start taking it every day? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Right away? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Recreationally? | ||
| First recreationally, then I got the prescription, so it was FDA approved. | ||
| So you did listen to the psychiatrist. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I did listen. | |
| She is a doctor. | ||
| Yes, but then I started taking more and having to buy them off the street. | ||
| And then at one point I couldn't get any and this kid I knew, this kind of bad seed, I asked him if he had any. | ||
| He had something he said his uncle made. | ||
| It was like a synthetic drug. | ||
| Turned out to be bath salts. | ||
| I ended up taking them. | ||
| I greeted her at H&R Block, you know, the tax place. | ||
| And I just, like, basically had this horrible panic meltdown. | ||
| Like, it kicked in, and I just thought I was about to die. | ||
| And when I called my twin sister, I freaked her out. | ||
| I was like, I think I'm about to die. | ||
| Goodbye. | ||
| And then I hung up. | ||
| And then she called back. | ||
| And she was like, call the ambulance. | ||
| They called the ambulance. | ||
| My heart rate was at, like, 100 and, like, I don't know. | ||
| Probably what yours is when you're exercising. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But it was fast for me. | |
| Probably was normal. | ||
| There was like 190, like crazy shit. | ||
| That's redlining. | ||
| It was crazy. | ||
| Yeah, I almost died, and then I ended up going to rehab for Adderall, which is kind of embarrassing. | ||
| How hard was it to kick? | ||
| You know, I weaned off, which was, if you wean off, I think it's okay. | ||
| Cold turkey is not for me. | ||
| So you said you were up to 90 a day, so how'd you wean? | ||
| You know, I was just 80 in one week. | ||
| Really? | ||
| I think something like that, yeah. | ||
| So were you completely functional when you were on it, or were you out of your mind? | ||
| No, no, I was functional. | ||
| I was annoying. | ||
| That was the thing. | ||
| I was annoying. | ||
| Oh, you couldn't stop talking. | ||
| Yeah, I got really annoying. | ||
| And that, it ended up, like, people were just, that's the thing, people think drugs will, you know, I'm not like a crazy person, but I just annoyed everyone. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And so the intervention was more like, you're really annoying, you talk nonstop. | ||
| And then I got off and it was kind of the same. | ||
| It wasn't that different. | ||
| I'm like, no, that's just me. | ||
| And you're in a lot of work. | ||
| It's actually a perk. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| It's actually a plus. | ||
| But I miss it. | ||
| I mean, I could never do it again, but I miss it. | ||
| It was my favorite drug. | ||
| Like everyone, I have low self-esteem. | ||
| And when he did it, it made me just write. | ||
| I just was so productive on it. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, because when I write, I mean, I've gotten better at it now over the years, but when I write, you have that voice telling you it's shit and you can't move forward. | ||
| And the Adderall, this was before I was doing stand-up a little, but writing screenplays and stuff. | ||
| And the Adderall gave me the confidence to just fucking plow through it. | ||
| It wasn't all good, but some of it was good. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Well, I mean, that's why they were prescribing it to people back in the day when they first came up with it. | ||
| Like in Nazi Germany, even before they were giving it to the Nazis, you could buy that. | ||
| What was it called? | ||
| What is it called? | ||
| Pervitin? | ||
| Pervitin? | ||
| Pervitin. | ||
| That's the Hitler speed? | ||
| Well, it was the for sale version of methamphetamine that you could buy at drugstores. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And people would just take it. | ||
| It was like a low dose. | ||
| It's essentially just like, that's it right there. | ||
| Kind of real similar to Adderall in a lot of ways. | ||
| But it was a, you know, it was methamphetamine. | ||
| Oh, right. | ||
| And you just could take it. | ||
| This is like over-the-counter, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Back when they had like heroin candy. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Methamphetamine hydrochloride. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| So it was a small dose, and people would take it all day long, and it gave them all this energy to get things done. | ||
| I mean, think about the engineering that was coming out of Germany at the same time. | ||
| Kind of nuts, man. | ||
| They were focused. | ||
| They were fucking dialed in. | ||
| He was really focused on that Jew-hating, that Adderall. | ||
| That speed really focused. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| If he wasn't on it, he probably wouldn't have killed as many people. | ||
| Well, if he wasn't on everything. | ||
| He was on oxycodone and they were giving him all these crazy animal hormones. | ||
| He was having them remove animal organs and they were injecting glands into Hitler's body. | ||
| They were practicing on it. | ||
| But here's what I don't get. | ||
| I've done oxycodone, and when I'm on it, I'm very loving. | ||
| I love everyone. | ||
| He was on it, and he was still hating it. | ||
| He should have been like, I love the juice. | ||
| The oxycodone should have made him more lovey-dovey. | ||
| Yeah, that's why I was confused, too, because I had always heard that it was meth. | ||
| Because I knew that there was meth use, and I knew that Hitler liked cocaine, and they used to shoot him up with testosterone, too. | ||
| And that makes sense. | ||
| That makes sense. | ||
| You're a meth. | ||
| You're like, we got a problem. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm focused. | ||
| I'm going to commit to it. | ||
| But the Oxy, it's like when Rush Limbaugh, you found out he was on Oxy, he was always so angry. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| And I feel like if I was on Oxy, I'd be like, everything's going to work out. | ||
| Bro, he was on like 90 pills a day. | ||
| But where, like the love- He did so much, they think it's part of the reason why he went deaf. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Rush? | ||
| Yeah, there's actually a thing that happens when you overdose on opiates. | ||
| You take too much opiates, it just fries your fucking ears. | ||
| To have all that hate on the painkillers, I just don't get. | ||
| When I'm on painkillers, I love my enemies. | ||
| I think it's because you're a nice guy. | ||
| Oh, I like that spin. | ||
| I think who you are at your core, why you operate in life... | ||
| Whatever you're taking, whether it's alcohol or pot or whatever, it only enhances that, who you are at your core. | ||
| So if you're like an evil person deep down, but you're covering it, and then you get drunk and you get really vicious with people, those people are probably already vicious inside of them. | ||
| Right. | ||
| That's totally true. | ||
| But if you're a happy drunk, you're probably a good guy. | ||
| And you need a couple of drinks to feel loose, and now you're fun, you're having a good time, you're loving, you're hugging everybody. | ||
| No, that's a good point. | ||
| What I used to drink, I would tell people I love them. | ||
| Now I'm sober, I don't tell anyone I love them. | ||
| Now I'm sober. | ||
| I'm worse sober. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like I'm just like rigid. | ||
| That's the benefit of some drugs is that they allow you to relax whatever insecurities you have and just be cool with people. | ||
| So my girlfriend, speaking of drugs, she's on like serious blood thinners because she just had a stroke. | ||
| Oh Jesus Christ. | ||
| How old is she? | ||
| Like a couple weeks ago. | ||
| She's 85. So when we started dating two and a half years ago, she was about to get open heart surgery. | ||
| She told me that on our first date. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Is this something she was born with? | ||
| It was a congenitive heart thing, mitral valve. | ||
| She had a mitral valve leak. | ||
| Oh Jesus. | ||
| And she found it out. | ||
| She's 37. And so four months into our dating, she got open heart surgery. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Yeah, and then everything was going well, and then this was like this month, maybe a month ago, I'm going to see a screening of my friend's movie, this really great comic Isabella Hagen had funded her own movie. | ||
| I'm going to see it, we're going to meet, and she calls me and she says she can't see out of her left eye, she's on the subway. | ||
| And we had to, like, call an ambulance and, like, rush to the hospital. | ||
| And, like, the crazy thing is the ambulance did not take us right away. | ||
| Like, we got in there and they, like, had to make her fill out her insurance. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| For, like, 20 minutes. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| That's so crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I thought an ambulance just goes. | |
| I thought they'd go, too. | ||
| They were, like, getting the insurance. | ||
| She's, like, dying. | ||
| They're, like, what's your group member ID number? | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| And then they finally went, and there was no siren. | ||
| We just had the ambulance without the siren, which was pointless, you know? | ||
| So, ambulance and traffic. | ||
| Ambulance and traffic. | ||
| We get to this, like, ER-type place. | ||
| They think she's having a stroke, and we had, like, a person on TV. It was, like, Black Mirror. | ||
| They got, like, some neurologist who was, like, on vacation. | ||
| They brought the TV in, like a TV, and she was on the video. | ||
| The camera was moving around the room looking at people. | ||
| It was so bizarre. | ||
| And she said if it's a stroke, she had to go on, like, really intense, like, blood thinners for the day. | ||
| And they were so intense that if she even bumped her head, she could get bleeding in the brain. | ||
| So they had to, like, observe her for, like, a day on these really... | ||
| Like, she couldn't go anywhere. | ||
| Because she bled so easily on these blood thinners. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| She just had to stay put. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So they gave it to her. | ||
| She started bleeding out of her mouth right away. | ||
| She had, like, a cut in her mouth. | ||
| She was, like, smiling, like blood coming out of her mouth. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| And then... | ||
| And then the craziest part is, so they had to take her to the ICU to observe her. | ||
| But we weren't at an ICU. We were at like an ER that didn't have people stay the night. | ||
| So we had to, even though she was on these blood thinners, because you had to go on them for four hours, they had to put her in an ambulance in the rain. | ||
| And we had to drive to a place where she couldn't move for a day because she could get, if she got hit. | ||
| Her head was like on the glass. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| It was insane. | ||
| Yeah, it was insane. | ||
| A lot of problems with EMTs and people like that. | ||
| It's not a problem, but it's part of the job is they get real accustomed to people being fucked up and dying. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Yeah, they didn't seem to be that urgent. | ||
| It's kind of crazy. | ||
| I've talked to friends that worked as EMTs and they have the most morose senses of humor. | ||
| And they're so used to people dying. | ||
| And they tell you a story. | ||
| They all have PTSD. They're all fucked up. | ||
| They all get their gunshot wounds and they all see the worst shit. | ||
| Car accidents. | ||
| The worst shit. | ||
| Motorcycle crashes. | ||
| For us, it was like a huge emergency, but for them, it's just a stroke. | ||
| Her head's intact, whatever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, my God. | |
| It's so crazy. | ||
| She can't get it back. | ||
| She has a blind spot in her right now. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No way it's coming back? | ||
| She's gotten used to seeing out both eyes, but when she closes one eye, it's like your forehead would be a little whited out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, wow. | |
| And I don't think it's going to come back. | ||
| She's doing great. | ||
| She's handled it very well. | ||
| But, yeah, it's... | ||
| It was sad. | ||
| We left the hospital after like a couple days. | ||
| And the saddest part is like we went outside and there was like a sunrise or a sunset. | ||
| And she was like, I can't. | ||
| It doesn't look very pretty to me. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, no. | |
| Yeah, it was awful. | ||
| But she's gotten a lot. | ||
| I think she can see a lot. | ||
| She's more adjusted to it. | ||
| But I feel so old. | ||
| I'm like, my girlfriend had a stroke. | ||
| I got a pastrami sandwich for her there, and I felt like just an old Jewish couple, just eating a pastrami sandwich. | ||
| After one of them had a stroke. | ||
| After one of them had a stroke. | ||
| Like, here, take your pastrami. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oof. | |
| Oof. | ||
| But, you know, I never thought in a million years I'd be the healthier one in the relationship. | ||
| That's the luck of the draw. | ||
| It's nice. | ||
| It evens out. | ||
| Like, when she had open heart surgery, we were both, I make a bit about this, but we were both kind of equally out of breath after that. | ||
| We'd go up subway stairs and we'd both just be, like, fantastic. | ||
| Oh, Jesus Christ. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But she's doing great and she handles it very well. | ||
| She's, like, a better person than me, which is kind of annoying. | ||
| So even in the hospital, she was, like, super worried. | ||
| She's a therapist. | ||
| She was super worried about, like, her patients while she was having the stroke. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| It's kind of annoying when people are like... | ||
| That good? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You're like, shut up. | ||
| Well, that's the kind of therapist you want. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let's hope she doesn't get jaded by the world. | ||
| Not yet. | ||
| Therapist, that's another one. | ||
| I mean, you've got to think everyone's out of their fucking mind, because everybody you're talking to is out of their fucking mind. | ||
| Oh yeah, and she sees people like, she's a social worker therapist, so she helps people who typically can't afford. | ||
| So it's not white people problem therapy. | ||
| It's like, you know, safety planning. | ||
| You know, how do I, you know, that kind of stuff. | ||
| It's not like, I feel unhappy. | ||
| It's like, your husband beat you, how do we get you out of the house kind of stuff. | ||
| Yeah, she has an intense life. | ||
| But it's nice to date, because to me the hardest part about dating someone is their job. | ||
| They have to tell boring work stories. | ||
| And you just have to deal with it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But her stories are never boring. | ||
| They're always like insane shit, you know? | ||
| I guess that's better. | ||
| I mean, it's better than pretending you care about her friend being mad at her at the, you know, whatever. | ||
| After a certain point in time, you might look for that. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| I'm looking for nonsense talk now. | ||
| I like heavy. | ||
| Do you? | ||
| I think so. | ||
| Even when she told me she was about to get open heart surgery. | ||
| I mean, I liked her. | ||
| I didn't get excited, but I was like, I don't shy away from that stuff, you know? | ||
| That's probably a good sign. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, it feels like we've been married for like 25 years now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Yeah, you've gone through a lot, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You really learn about someone. | ||
| If someone's going through heart surgery, how do you react to it? | ||
| In the hospital when she had it. | ||
| There's like, have you ever been to the hospital and someone gets surgery? | ||
| There's like a giant terminal thing that shows everyone's names and it says like in the middle, if they're in the middle of surgery or not. | ||
| And then sometimes it'll just flash canceled. | ||
| And you're like, did that person die? | ||
| But I think they just like, canceled the surgery. | ||
| Yeah, but yeah, it's intense. | ||
| But I got a couple good bits out of it and that's what's important. | ||
| Did she get upset that you have bits about it? | ||
| Uh, no. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| She might have been disturbed a little by the speed. | ||
| Well, it's tough. | ||
| I was in a rut a little. | ||
| Sometimes you're in a rut with comedy, and then something crazy happens and it just starts coming. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Yeah, the problem is if it involves someone else. | ||
| We get in that argument a lot. | ||
| Which I get. | ||
| I mean, she's not a comedian. | ||
| I just want to be personal. | ||
| I want to bravely disclose all her personal... | ||
| I want to bravely disclose all of it. | ||
| And how much trouble you're having dealing with her open heart. | ||
| Yeah, I'm very brave for bringing this stuff up about you. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| I feel that way. | ||
| But yeah, she's amazing. | ||
| And yeah, it's my first serious relationship and I'm already serious and I went from like Your first ever really serious one? | ||
| Like moving in with the person. | ||
| Oh wow. | ||
| I know, I'm like 40. But you're a comic and it's like, it's so hard for comics to just settle down to just staying put and doing things with a person. | ||
| It's tough. | ||
| You're just so used to just running from club to club and set to set and meeting your friends and it just becomes a bizarre lifestyle. | ||
| Especially when I moved to New York. | ||
| I got into the cellar, and at that point, it's really hard to date people because you get a lot of spots and you can't see anyone. | ||
| Yeah, your night times are filled. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| And they get mad. | ||
| You don't have to do a set tonight, but I do. | ||
| Yeah, you have to. | ||
| I remember when I was dating this girl, I was 25, and she was like, you don't have to go up tonight. | ||
| I'm like, but I do. | ||
| I suck. | ||
| I need to get better. | ||
| This is only one way to do it. | ||
| I know. | ||
| But I am working with my therapist about realizing that... | ||
| You know, I always, for years, saw the person you're in a relationship with is somehow, like, an enemy of your artistic process, you know? | ||
| Like, they're there to stifle you, and it's an unhealthy way of thinking, and I've tried to work about it. | ||
| How did you develop that way of thinking, you think? | ||
| I think my mom, though she's great, was pretty overbearing, like a Jewish mother. | ||
| And I think she was so kind of always overbearing, always wanting to know what was going on, that I think my response was just go in my room and shut people out. | ||
| And so I think I'm afraid... | ||
| You know, she's a Jewish mother, so she just tells me everything to do at all times. | ||
| So I think I've associated intimacy with someone... | ||
| I came up with this. | ||
| My therapist brought this up. | ||
| I'm not smart enough to realize this. | ||
| But I think I associate intimacy with someone trying to stifle me or smother me. | ||
| As opposed to something where you're trying to be in something... | ||
| But that also can happen if you're with someone who has, they don't understand, like if they have unreal expectations, they expect you to just quit doing comics. | ||
| Like I had a friend, and he was a good comic, and he was dating this woman who wanted him to get a job. | ||
| And he was doing pretty good. | ||
| He wasn't headlining all the places, but he was middling quite a few places. | ||
| And he had some bits that were bangers. | ||
| He had some good bits. | ||
| And he could have been a really good comic. | ||
| And then he got divorced a couple years later. | ||
| I ran into him three years later. | ||
| He got divorced. | ||
| He was trying to do comedy again. | ||
| But he hadn't done comedy in three years. | ||
| And he lost all of his momentum, and he couldn't get spots, and no one gave a shit, and everybody else had kind of moved on and moved up. | ||
| And that's a bad relationship, because she doesn't understand him. | ||
| My thing is my girlfriend doesn't think that way, and I sometimes find myself projecting that onto her, because she'll just be like, I'm not comfortable with you doing this joke, and I'm like, quit trying to silence me! | ||
| I think the thing was with this guy is that he was in his 30s, and it hadn't happened yet. | ||
| It was one of those, probably the parents, like, what is he doing? | ||
| What if he doesn't make it, you know? | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Like, have you ever experienced that? | ||
| I had a girl that I was dating when I was 21, and her father said that, like, what if he doesn't make it? | ||
| Like, first of all, I'm fucking 21. Yeah. | ||
| I'm a little kid. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Leave me alone, asshole. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| But second of all, like, who knows? | ||
| Yeah, he's right. | ||
| He's like, who fucking knows? | ||
| I might not make it, but... | ||
| I'm going to try. | ||
| I'm not going to not try because I might not make it. | ||
| That's a pussy's way to live life. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| And like, yeah, I mean, you have to like, I don't know. | ||
| I mean, to me, it's not about making it. | ||
| It's about if you love something, do it. | ||
| And do it even if you're broke. | ||
| I mean, to me, I don't believe in like, I don't think of things as having a safety plan. | ||
| David Mamet, I think it was him who said that, like, don't have a safety plan because you're falling back on it. | ||
| Yeah, that's common. | ||
| Don't have a net. | ||
| Don't have a net. | ||
| You will fall. | ||
| I think you just have to, if you love something, like for me, I love comedy. | ||
| I love making movies. | ||
| I'm focused on that. | ||
| That's wonderful. | ||
| But there are guys that are doing open mic nights for 25 fucking years and they're still terrible. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Maybe those guys should move on. | ||
| Oh, 100%. | ||
| That's what I'm saying. | ||
| The question is, are you one of those people, right? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Well, at 21, I really didn't know if I was one of those people. | ||
| But you have to at least give it a chance. | ||
| And if you're dating someone that doesn't want you to do something wild and take a chance, this is not going to work. | ||
| Yeah, it's definitely good, especially if you have a kid, I feel like it's definitely good to already have a career of some... | ||
| Like, I have a career. | ||
| It's not, like, amazing, but it's a career. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that helps. | ||
| Like, it's like, I am making money. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| But it's really tough if you're, like, don't make money. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Especially if you have a kid. | ||
| Oh, if you have a kid and you're starting out as a comic, boy, that is a fucking uphill slog. | ||
| You're fucked because then you're also selfish now. | ||
| Like, you're selfish if you're taking spots. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| When you should be getting... | ||
| So that's tough. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I mean? | |
| Well, if you live in the city, at least you can do it when everyone's asleep. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| You know, when I was living in L.A., I would do 10 o'clock shows. | ||
| So I'd be at home, and then everybody's basically going to bed. | ||
| I'm like, I'm going out. | ||
| I'm going to go do shows. | ||
| So I do shows from 9 p.m. | ||
|
unidentified
|
on. | |
| That's true. | ||
| But how was... | ||
| Was it hard when you first had a kid? | ||
| Like... | ||
| Yeah, it's crazy. | ||
| That's got to be tough doing comedy. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| But it's also, you know... | ||
| The thing is, like, they go to bed early. | ||
| And as long as you have a spouse that understands what's going on and she's cool with it, you can go out and do sets. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| But if you're starting out then, and this is like this pipe dream that you have, and you're not making any money doing it, that's a totally different thing. | ||
| Like, I was already a headliner. | ||
| I was already on television. | ||
| I was already making money. | ||
| That's how we made money. | ||
| I had to go do comedy. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| So that's a job. | ||
| But it's not a dream, you know? | ||
| It's like... | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| If you're chasing a dream and you're 36 and you have three kids and you want to quit your job at the accounting company, like, yikes, bro. | ||
| Now you're kind of being an asshole. | ||
| Well, it's also like, you better get really fucking good before you quit that job. | ||
| And how are you going to have the time to get really fucking good? | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| You want to, like, if you're going to have a kid, I think, we talked about, it's a possibility at some point, it's like, you want to at least make enough money in your career that if you had a kid, you'd actually just have to work harder at your career, as opposed to getting another career. | ||
| Right, exactly, exactly. | ||
| And it's like, there's a lot of people that are, they have the dream of stand-up, but they probably haven't really gone at it 100%. | ||
| Yeah, well that's the other thing. | ||
| And they still have this thing in the back of their head that one day they will and one day they'll really bear down and really start writing and really start performing more often and going up more than twice a week and they just don't. | ||
| And then they get into the situation where like, oh my god, everyone's kind of passed me by and all the guys I started out with are now working professionals touring the road and I'm still stuck in LA. Right, right, right. | ||
| Yeah, you have to work hard at it. | ||
| We were talking about if we had a kid, I was talking to her, and I was like, well, you would, you know, on the weekend I'd be on the road, but during the day, during the week, I'd babysit the kid. | ||
| And she's like, it doesn't feel like you're very serious if you're referring to it as babysitting. | ||
| Your own kid. | ||
| Yeah, you can't say, what'd you do all day? | ||
| I babysat. | ||
| Oh, whose kid's mine? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| It doesn't seem like you're really committed to it. | ||
| No, I'll babysit the kid. | ||
| You have a very clear responsibility, and it's not yours. | ||
| I'll do your job for you if you want to take a nap. | ||
| I'll babysit the kid for you. | ||
| You do it back to being the boss of the kids. | ||
| Just pay me $10 an hour. | ||
| I did say that. | ||
| Give me what number to call if anything goes wrong. | ||
| Yeah, that's hilarious. | ||
| But yeah, having a kid is scary, but I think it's good. | ||
| I think it's good. | ||
| But it's not good for everybody, and it's not good depending upon what kind of relationship you're in. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You definitely can't do it to save a relationship. | ||
| Oh my God, I've seen that happen before. | ||
| I'm like, what are you doing? | ||
| Are you crazy? | ||
| You guys are about to break up and now you're having a kid? | ||
| Yeah, that doesn't work. | ||
| No one's like, we're about to break up. | ||
| It's going to keep us together. | ||
| Sort of, I guess. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, you'll always talk. | ||
| I feel like kids... | ||
| They break people apart more than anything. | ||
| They break some people apart. | ||
| They bring some people closer. | ||
| They definitely brought me and my wife closer. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It doesn't have to be a negative thing. | ||
| It's just like comics look at it as a thief of their time. | ||
| I know. | ||
| And Louis said it best. | ||
| He said, you just got to let it change you. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| I thought that was really good advice. | ||
| Because it definitely changes you, and you can't resist it. | ||
| You just got to be who you are now. | ||
| You're just a different person now. | ||
| Now you're a person that's watching babies come out of your wife's body. | ||
| And then grow up and talk to you and you take them to do things together and you have fun laughing together. | ||
| It's like this very strange thing where a life that did not exist now exists. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And you love it more than anything you've ever loved in your life. | ||
| You love this person. | ||
| And you love it no matter if the kid is like telling a boring story. | ||
| Like it goes beyond. | ||
| Like with your friends, you're like, every story's got to be entertaining, you know? | ||
| But with people you love, it's like you just love them. | ||
| I talk to my kids about the most boring shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But to them, it's not boring. | ||
| They like to talk about bands they like and stuff they like. | ||
| It's interesting. | ||
| It's fascinating to watch their little minds grow and the way they interface with the world and see them develop skills and things. | ||
| Yeah, all my siblings have kids. | ||
| They're a lot of fun. | ||
| It's time to do it if you're 40. I know. | ||
| I keep on acting like I'm rushing into things. | ||
| I'm like, I don't know. | ||
| It seems so quick. | ||
| And then I'm like, wait, I'm 40 years old. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I always think I'm rushing into things when it's actually like the last chance. | ||
| Or at least the last chance. | ||
| We will. | ||
| It's going to be a little on hold because of the stroke. | ||
| Yeah, I would say that's probably a good move. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Well, she's on blood thinners now. | ||
| She's like a hemophiliac. | ||
| How long does she have to stay on those? | ||
| What? | ||
| How long does she have to stay on those? | ||
| Until they figure out what kind of caused it. | ||
| Roger Ailes was a hemophiliac? | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Was he? | |
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jesus. | |
| That's a scary one. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Anybody could just punch you to death. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Just give you a bloody nose and you bleed out. | ||
| Yeah, it's crazy. | ||
| That's nuts. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, she's not like that now, but in the ICU, she's basically a hemophiliac, yeah. | ||
| And so she has to stay on these for how long? | ||
| I think they're trying to find out exactly. | ||
| They still don't know what caused the stroke. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| They assume it's something to do with a heart surgery. | ||
| Makes sense. | ||
| Either that or God hates her and just giving her a bunch of shit. | ||
| A double whammy to deal with. | ||
| But I think it's... | ||
| Yeah, I think they'll find out. | ||
| But yeah, hopefully not. | ||
| I mean, I think she'd have to get off if we had a kid. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But yeah, I have like six nephews and nieces. | ||
| So you've got baby fever a little bit. | ||
| It seems like you keep talking about it. | ||
| A little bit. | ||
| A little bit. | ||
| A little touch. | ||
| A little touch, but also, you know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
A little touch of the fever. | |
| But also not having a kid. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| They both have good points and bad points. | ||
|
unidentified
|
For sure. | |
| I don't think everybody needs to. | ||
| There's a lot of people that have kids that say, everybody should have a kid. | ||
| I think you can have a wonderful life without having children. | ||
| I think it's totally possible. | ||
| Well, the people who killed their kids probably shouldn't have had kids. | ||
| Everybody should have it. | ||
| I read this horrible story about this child prodigy that, like, the mother trained this child to do everything. | ||
| They rebelled at 18 and she killed them. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Rebelled against a thing? | ||
| I forget. | ||
| I got so disturbed by it, I turned the page. | ||
| But I was reading about this. | ||
| But that person shouldn't have had a kid. | ||
| Yeah, well, there's a lot of psychos that their kid is just a representation of them. | ||
| It's not an individual human being. | ||
| It's their property. | ||
| It's them going through life. | ||
| You will do what I tell you to do. | ||
| You will be a lawyer. | ||
| You will be a football player. | ||
| Whatever the fuck it is. | ||
| Well, that's why the other bullshit thing is that people who act like kids make you a better person. | ||
| Not everybody. | ||
| That's not true. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's like the oxycodone thing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Who are you? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| It intensifies. | ||
| It's actually who you are, but now there's much bigger moral consequences. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You can be kind of a dick, but it's not that big of a deal. | ||
| But then if you have a kid and you're still a dick, now you're like a bad person. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Where before you were just kind of a dick. | ||
| Or you're just exuding excellence in broadcasting. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Kind of makes sense why he's so cocky. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The guy was like flying high all day. | |
| Wee! | ||
| Rush. | ||
| Rush. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's excellence in broadcasting. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That was his thing, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Excellence in broadcasting. | ||
| Rush Limbo. | ||
| Just to never at once just be at peace. | ||
| It just made me think, too, like this whole idea of conservatives being like buttoned down, sober people, like look at the world clearly. | ||
| No, your fucking main guy's pilled out of his fucking mind, spouting out nonsense. | ||
| Obama's from Kenya. | ||
| We'll be right back. | ||
| They're like the real fucking hippies on all these drugs. | ||
| As long as it's prescribed by a doctor, it's not a drug! | ||
| That's how I go by it. | ||
| The doctor said! | ||
| The doctor said! | ||
| I told the doctor I have an Adderall problem, he gave me a prescription! | ||
| It is so funny to be like, I have a real problem, we'll just prescribe it for you. | ||
| That is so wild that they said that to you. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It was insane. | ||
| That's so wild. | ||
| Yeah, well, you need it. | ||
| Obviously, you're on it. | ||
| You shouldn't get off of it, because then you could die or something. | ||
| You could fucking be slow and not as... | ||
| It was hard to get off. | ||
| It was hard to go back to writing without it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, yeah. | |
| It's tough, but I had to do it. | ||
| I can't go back on it now because I would chain smoke on it, and I quit smoking. | ||
| And honestly, that's more worrisome. | ||
| Like, if I took an Adderall, I would just chain smoke again. | ||
| It seems like a lot of coping. | ||
| A lot of things going on in your head right now when you're talking about this. | ||
| Oh, wait, what do you mean? | ||
| Because it always has a grip on you. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| It's like, well, maybe I could go back, but then I would start chain smoking, and I don't want to do that, so I don't want to go back. | ||
| All right, let's do it. | ||
| Let's relapse right now. | ||
| Just fucking crush him and start snorting him. | ||
| Lloyd Bridges from Airplane. | ||
| Bad day to get back on Adderall. | ||
| Yeah, I've avoided those, but I've been curious about Adderall. | ||
| Have you never done it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nope. | |
| Nope. | ||
| Never done cocaine, never done Adderall. | ||
| So you do drugs. | ||
| Yeah, but when I was a kid, I got very lucky. | ||
| Not lucky, but one of my friends, his cousin, was addicted to coke. | ||
| And I watched this guy's life completely fall apart. | ||
| He was selling coke. | ||
| It was like he got bit by a vampire. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| He was a different person. | ||
| He was real skinny and all gaunt and shit and just coked up all the time and fucked up. | ||
| You're not supposed to use your own supply. | ||
| That's like a biggie. | ||
| Well, he didn't follow the rules. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He does follow the coke protocol. | |
| I think a lot of them don't follow the rules. | ||
| He wasn't like a businessman. | ||
| He was a guy who got coke and sold some of it. | ||
| Such a nerd. | ||
| That's not drug dealer protocol. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, it's from the biggie, the Ten Crack Commandments. | ||
| Ten Crack Commandments. | ||
| Don't get high off your own supply. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, I did a lot of coke back in the day, too. | ||
| I mean, you see a lot of sunrises, which is pretty. | ||
| That's a good way to look at it. | ||
| I've seen way more sunrises now than I would have if I didn't do cocaine. | ||
| But what about when you were getting up at farmer hours? | ||
| You saw a lot of sunrises then, too? | ||
| Yeah, but as a kid, I didn't appreciate it. | ||
| When you're a kid, you're never like, oh, look at a beautiful sunrise. | ||
| And it's easier to stay awake than it is to get up. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| That's a good point. | ||
| Very good point. | ||
| If you're on Adderall, it's way easier to just stay up. | ||
| That sounds like a profound line in a song. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like a Dylan line. | ||
| When I was young, I used to love staying up all night. | ||
| I used to think it was awesome that I would be going to bed when everybody was running around. | ||
| Oh, yeah? | ||
|
unidentified
|
It is. | |
| That's my favorite thing. | ||
| It's a sacred time. | ||
| I have this comedian friend of mine, great comic, Ben Moore. | ||
| He had an awful sleeping schedule where he would literally go to bed at nine in the morning. | ||
| And woke up at 5 p.m. | ||
| and just started his day when everyone was ending there. | ||
| Was he a comic? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's comic life. | ||
| Yeah, that's a little too much. | ||
| That's a lot. | ||
| You need sunlight. | ||
| Yeah, every now and then you probably shouldn't do that, but every now and again do it. | ||
| I don't think it's so bad. | ||
| But I like sunlight. | ||
| It's good for you. | ||
| It's how you get vitamin D, how you stay healthy. | ||
| But when I was in my early 20s when I lived in New York, I would stay up all night all the time. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, I'd go to bed. | ||
| Not on cocaine, that's very impressive. | ||
| Just high on life? | ||
| Playing pool mostly. | ||
| Oh, you're a big pool guy? | ||
| Yeah, so I'd go to the clubs, then afterwards go to the pool hall, play pool until 4 o'clock in the morning, go to a diner, get something to eat with my friends. | ||
| 6 o'clock in the morning, I was hanging out with just complete derelicts, like pool hustlers and crazy people, and comics. | ||
| So it was like no one was normal. | ||
| And so then it was normal, so if I called someone at 5 o'clock, I said I just woke up, they would think it was funny. | ||
| I was like, I was up all night. | ||
| It was normal. | ||
| It wasn't like you, loser. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| I was like, oh, you're living the crazy young life. | ||
| And you liked it, huh? | ||
| It was a good time. | ||
| I'm impressed that you could do that without cocaine. | ||
| I feel like that's very impressive. | ||
| Yeah, but when you're playing pool all night and you're drinking coffee and just hanging out, it's the time. | ||
| And also, I was so used to it. | ||
| I didn't have anything to get up for. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| I didn't have a job. | ||
| That's when you were doing comedy. | ||
| Yeah, I just started making money doing comedy, so I had enough money that comedy for the first time in my life was legitimately paying my bills. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| Paying my rent. | ||
| I had a car. | ||
| I was driving around to gigs. | ||
| I was doing headliner gigs in Connecticut and Jersey, like $500 there, $350 there. | ||
| So every week I was making a good amount of money, and I was just having a good time. | ||
| That's great. | ||
| They always talk about the moment where you start making it and you can quit your day job. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That never happened... | ||
| I would have day jobs and make a little money on comedy, and then the day job would want to fire me because I wasn't there enough. | ||
| But I'd like, no, I need this job. | ||
| I don't make enough in comedy. | ||
| And then they'd fire me. | ||
| I'd be forced to focus on comedy. | ||
| How many years in did you become a complete professional? | ||
| I think like 11. Oh, wow. | ||
| So you really did keep a job. | ||
| Do you think the job held you back, or do you think it helped you? | ||
| No, I only had shitty part-time jobs. | ||
| I started opening for Kathleen Madigan on the road, and that's when I first started having money. | ||
| And she was great, and it was great working with her. | ||
| She's hilarious. | ||
| She's amazing. | ||
| I really learned a lot from her, and she's one of the best. | ||
| And that's where I first kind of had money, where I could actually move to New York. | ||
| I think I had part-time jobs, and then I was just living with my parents and doing comedy on the road, going to the loony bins and shit, taking greyhounds. | ||
| I took greyhounds everywhere. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| I paid my dues. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nice. | |
| I would take an 18-hour greyhound. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ooh. | |
| I did that a couple of times. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| Bus trips to a gig are rough. | ||
| It's like the DMV on wheels. | ||
| It's just the most depressing. | ||
| It's the weirdest fucking people. | ||
| Like, where are you in normal walks of life other than Walmart? | ||
| You're like, yeah, how did you even get on a bus? | ||
| Oh, I've heard, like, the craziest shit. | ||
| Like, the Greyhound is just, like, insane. | ||
| Am I that story about that one guy who cut a guy's head off on a Greyhound? | ||
| I used to have a bit about it, because other comics have the observational airplane material, but I wasn't doing well enough to take an airplane. | ||
| I'd open all my bits with Greyhound material. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| Just got here from the Greyhound. | ||
| I had a bit about how it was... | ||
| I was surprised the bus even stopped after that. | ||
| Usually they just keep on going and hope the shit works itself out. | ||
| That guy, what was he, was just like schizophrenic or something? | ||
| He cut some guy's head off that was sitting next to him? | ||
| He's schizophrenic. | ||
| It was a carny. | ||
| Canada man who behead bus passenger granted freedom. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| The Canadian legal system is insane. | ||
| Wait, what? | ||
| Yeah, no, he got out. | ||
| He got out. | ||
| He's been granted freedom? | ||
| Full freedom? | ||
| Yeah, no, it's crazy. | ||
| When you read this, it'll make you, like, appreciate America. | ||
| He was deemed not criminally responsible and received mental health treatment. | ||
| A review board in Manitoba ordered his discharge without monitoring, saying he did not pose a significant threat. | ||
| When you behead someone on a bus, aren't you a significant threat? | ||
| I just feel like once you've beheaded someone, that's it. | ||
| That's it for you. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Right? | ||
| He removed his internal organs. | ||
| He immediately stabbed him. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Attack began without warnings, alerted by screams from the victim. | ||
| The driver stopped the bus and fled with the passengers as Mr. Baker continued his attack. | ||
| He was found not criminally responsible in 2009 for the killing, spent seven years in treatment, secure wing of a psychiatric hospital. | ||
| The voice told me I was the third story of the Bible, that I was like the second coming of Jesus, and I was to save people from a space alien attack. | ||
| He also said he was really sorry for what he had done. | ||
| It's funny, back to back. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's the best that they took them completely out of context. | |
| Generally, I'm not a fan of that. | ||
| But in this stretch, I put that back up. | ||
| I like how they talk them completely out of context and said, really sorry, in quotes. | ||
| Not even dot, dot, dot. | ||
| I was killing to prevent space aliens. | ||
| But also, my bad. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Pfft. | |
| Are you sorry? | ||
| I'm really sorry. | ||
| I'm really sorry. | ||
| There's something about really sorry that's just very funny for that. | ||
| He definitely doesn't pose a significant threat to the safety of the public. | ||
| Imagine if that's your friend. | ||
| This guy cut your friend's head off and they just let him out. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| They did a radio lab about this. | ||
| In America, if you behead someone, that's like the end of your- That's a wrap. | ||
| That's a wrap. | ||
| As it should be. | ||
| I feel like once you cut off a head, there's no resuscitating your career. | ||
| But there, they just observed him for a little bit. | ||
| He believed the victim was an alien. | ||
| He had his reasons. | ||
| You hear about the lady in California that smoked weed and she stabbed her boyfriend. | ||
| She killed him. | ||
| She stabbed him like 11 times. | ||
| Something crazy. | ||
| And they deemed her not criminally responsible because she went psychotic. | ||
| She had a psychotic break from the weed. | ||
| But here's the thing. | ||
| Was she really sorry? | ||
| She was really sorry. | ||
| If she was really sorry. | ||
| I think she said really, really. | ||
| Really, really. | ||
| I think we're good. | ||
| I feel like that guy needed another really. | ||
| Don't you think? | ||
| I feel like that is one of those moments where I go, okay, if that was a man that did that to a woman and had the same excuse, I do not think anybody would buy it. | ||
| No. | ||
| Not for a fucking second. | ||
| Just to be like... | ||
| Woman? | ||
| Oh, 108 times. | ||
| Excuse me. | ||
| Excuse me. | ||
| 108 times. | ||
| Did I say 11? | ||
| You said 11. I'm at 108. What the fuck? | ||
| I forgot. | ||
| A potent strain of pot. | ||
| Yeah, it's super potent. | ||
| That's a really potent strain. | ||
| Dude, relax. | ||
| Stop being so judgy. | ||
| I mean, it was really potent. | ||
| Do they have to call him potent? | ||
| She went to jail scot-free. | ||
| Hmm. | ||
| She was convicted of involuntary manslaughter. | ||
| What is the difference between involuntary and involuntary? | ||
| I didn't mean to kill him. | ||
| I only stabbed him 108 times. | ||
| Yeah, I guess involuntary is... | ||
| One time should be attempted murder, and if you actually kill them, it's murder. | ||
| Well, yeah, of course. | ||
| Right? | ||
| That's one stab. | ||
| Yeah, premeditated comes in for murder. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| But wait a minute. | ||
| Isn't it second-degree murder if it's not premeditated? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah, man. | |
| I think that's what it is. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think that's what second-degree murder is. | ||
| Like, you don't mean to... | ||
| Yeah, manslaughter's an accident. | ||
| Isn't it weird that premeditated is worse? | ||
| Because the other one is kind of like, oh, he could kill at any time without warning, but that should get a lesser sentence. | ||
| Yeah, kind of crazy. | ||
| I feel like that's the scarier one. | ||
| The premeditated is like, at least you... | ||
| At least you might know if he's planning it again because he plans it. | ||
| I see what you're saying. | ||
| He's got his reasons. | ||
| The guy on the bus is like, I could kill anyone at any time. | ||
| And they're like, well, that's not as bad. | ||
| Although the two were dating, Spetcher told the outlet she never considered Amelia her official boyfriend and said she told him she no longer had any romantic interest in him two days before killing him. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| She claimed he was aggressive, intimidating, and had a temper, she told the outlet. | ||
| So when he encouraged her to hit a bong on the day of the stabbing, she gave into the pressure, then went into a deadly psychosis. | ||
| Well, I think her alibi is that he was really annoying. | ||
| He seems super annoying. | ||
| He got real loud and yelly. | ||
| Yeah, imagine that for a while. | ||
| He got super shouty. | ||
| Fuck that guy. | ||
| Imagine a guy doing that. | ||
| So we're both accountable. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| But there's obviously been more attention to my part versus Chad's part. | ||
| The part where the guy got stabbed 108 times? | ||
| I feel like people are really focused on me, and I just don't think it's the full story. | ||
| Such sexism and bullshit. | ||
| I stabbed him 108 times, but he also raised his voice a lot. | ||
| He got shouty. | ||
| Yeah, but they're just focusing on the- And he scared me. | ||
| Okay, he fucking raised his voice. | ||
| That's the problem. | ||
| Stabbing someone 111 times really- 108. Sorry, 108. It wasn't that potent. | ||
| Hyperbole. | ||
| I love how they say potent weed. | ||
| Super potent. | ||
| As if that's the strand. | ||
| Like you go to the drugstore, they're like, this strand will have you stab your boyfriend. | ||
| A month before the fatal encounter, Amelia's roommate also had an extreme reaction after smoking out of the same bong, Goldstein said. | ||
| He suffered hallucinations and fear of death. | ||
| But that just sounds like you get too high. | ||
| That's just what every time I get out of it. | ||
| What fucking bong does this guy have? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| She only smoked pot less than a half a dozen times prior to the stabbing, her lawyer said, describing her as a naive user. | ||
| She's naive. | ||
| But just imagine the sexes being reversed. | ||
| She got really yelly, and I got real nervous. | ||
| And, you know, I'd only smoked pot like six times before that. | ||
| Oh, well, in that case, yeah. | ||
| Are you really, really sorry? | ||
| Well, also, like, what about her part? | ||
| Well, I guess she was kind of responsible. | ||
| It's just funny that they're using weed like it's bath salts or crystal meth. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| It was a really strong weed. | ||
| 31% THC. That's pretty high, son. | ||
| But it's like, no matter how- Because there's caution for high-tolerance users only. | ||
| Yeah, but the problem is the side effects or the effects of marijuana do not match that at all. | ||
| No! | ||
| It's the opposite. | ||
| I don't- Yeah, that's- I think that's on her. | ||
| Los Angeles-based dispensary found marijuana flower for sale legally with TH levels as high as 39%. | ||
| That's even more potent. | ||
| Similar levels were available Friday from a local competitor, but yet no one's running around stabbing people. | ||
| It's just so crazy that they accepted that. | ||
| That sounds so nuts. | ||
| And you talk about victim blaming. | ||
| Well, what about Chad? | ||
| Chad was really shouty. | ||
| Oh, his name was Chad? | ||
| And then nevermind. | ||
| Yeah, his name was Chad. | ||
| Nevermind then. | ||
| Didn't they say... | ||
| That's his name, right? | ||
| Chad. | ||
| I hate that name. | ||
| It's not a good name for a guy that got stabbed. | ||
| Automatically. | ||
| Unless her name's Karen. | ||
| Automatically you're gonna be on... | ||
| Sean. | ||
| It was Sean? | ||
| Sean. | ||
| But it's like what we said. | ||
| No, Chad. | ||
| Chad. | ||
| Yeah, killing of Chad. | ||
| I don't know why it says Sean here. | ||
| Chad. | ||
| People don't even care about the guy's fucking name. | ||
| Fuck Chad. | ||
| His father, Sean. | ||
| I mean, like, yeah, that's what we talked about before, when the drug brings out who you are inside. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, the killing of the... | ||
| Stabbing someone 108 times, that's you. | ||
| Also, how do you keep doing it after you do it one or two times? | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's really boring after a while. | ||
| That's so crazy. | ||
| Your arm must get tired. | ||
| You stabbed him 108 times. | ||
| It's actually a pretty impressive workout. | ||
| She probably hurt herself. | ||
| What about that? | ||
| She got hurt too. | ||
| What about that? | ||
| It's a good point. | ||
| I couldn't imagine ever seeing those roles reversed. | ||
| There's no way. | ||
| Yeah, I stabbed her 108 times, but here's the thing. | ||
| She was real naggy. | ||
| Super shouty. | ||
| And I was pretty high. | ||
| Yeah, I got really high. | ||
| And I don't get that high. | ||
| All right, you are. | ||
| I only smoked pot five or six times. | ||
| That's not like your first time. | ||
| Five or six times is like, you know what weed does. | ||
| But weed doesn't do anything. | ||
| It doesn't make you kill people. | ||
| No. | ||
| No. | ||
| I mean, you can go crazy, though. | ||
| You can freak out. | ||
| Some people freak out. | ||
| They really do. | ||
| But she must have really despised that guy. | ||
| And that might have popped out of her. | ||
| Or am I with this fucking idiot? | ||
| That's in there, not that deep. | ||
| It's not like you're just like, yeah, fuck. | ||
| 108 times. | ||
| I mean, I've had like, you know, I get anxious on weed. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But you don't go around stabby. | ||
| No, I just sit there thinking everyone's going to hate me and I'm going to die. | ||
| I don't think about stabbing people. | ||
| 108 times. | ||
| That is excessive. | ||
| If you did anything 100 times on your high, you probably meant to do it. | ||
| Yeah, it seems like if you hit 108 golf balls, that's what you're trying to do. | ||
| That's about the max you can do. | ||
| You get pretty fucking tired. | ||
| Seems like she was more on Adderall with that amount of stabbing. | ||
| That sounds so crazy. | ||
| I want to know if she was on anything else along with it. | ||
| Because, you know, if you mix Zoloft with cocaine, it's very dangerous. | ||
| There's certain things that if you mix stuff with, no bueno. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, people lose their fucking marbles. | ||
| What's bad with Prozac? | ||
| I'm on Prozac. | ||
| That's a good question. | ||
| What is bad with Prozac? | ||
| Let's find out. | ||
| If you're on Prozac, should you be taking edibles? | ||
| Oh, boy. | ||
| What happens? | ||
| I take one every night. | ||
| Oh, well, you're the test. | ||
| It's fine for you. | ||
| I was looking up... | ||
| That's the thing. | ||
| It's like, what's fine for you is not fine for everybody. | ||
| I was looking up NyQuil because I was taking... | ||
| I also take a sleeping pill. | ||
| I wanted to see if NyQuil... | ||
| Here it goes. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| You shouldn't take... | ||
| It may increase your risk for bleeding problems. | ||
| Oh, a couple of strokers. | ||
| Make sure your doctor knows if you're also taking other medicines that thin the blood, including non-steroidal anti-inflammatories like ibuprofen. | ||
| I take Advil all the time. | ||
| It interacts with monoamine oxidase inhibitors, MAOIs, other antidepressants, and blood thinners. | ||
| I sound like I'm okay. | ||
| I can't make sure it's my girlfriend's medication. | ||
| That's saying don't take ayahuasca, though. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm not really. | ||
| I don't think I would take ayahuasca. | ||
| Well, don't do it. | ||
| If you're on the Brozac, don't do it. | ||
| I'm not into that. | ||
| It said non-steroidal anti-inflammatories and MAO inhibitors, and that's one of the ingredients. | ||
| Serious bleeding, serotonin syndrome. | ||
| What's the serious bleeding? | ||
| I think it's about the blood thinning stuff. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Manufacturer Prozac recommends that you avoid drinking and alcohol while taking this drug. | ||
| Hey, I don't drink! | ||
| There you go. | ||
| Alcohol can worsen. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. | |
| I think I'm good. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I think I'm good. | ||
| Just don't take my girlfriend's blood thinners. | ||
| Does the Prozac make you kind of speedy at all? | ||
| No. | ||
| I have a really bad anxiety I've had my whole life. | ||
| I was on Paxil for like 10 years. | ||
| And then I tried to get off of it. | ||
| What is Paxil? | ||
| What is that one? | ||
| It's like an ant. | ||
| It's just another SSRI. And I got off of it like five years ago. | ||
| Just weaned off of it. | ||
| And then like six months later I had the worst panic of my life. | ||
| I basically was dizzy for like three months straight. | ||
| Oh boy. | ||
| I had a panic attack at every show. | ||
| Just on stage. | ||
| Every open mic. | ||
| Open mic or whatever. | ||
| I'd have a panic attack on stage. | ||
| It was awful. | ||
| And I was super dizzy, and my psychiatrist said it wasn't even withdrawal. | ||
| Is this the same one that gave you the Adderall prescription? | ||
| No, no. | ||
| No? | ||
| Different one? | ||
| Are you one of those guys that shops around for different psychiatrists? | ||
| Well, that was in Louisville. | ||
| It was in New York. | ||
| After I went to rehab, I was like, maybe I should get a different shrink. | ||
| But I had terrible dizziness, and I had to get on something else, so I got on Prozac, and it helped a little with that. | ||
| Is there anything else that helped other than Prozac? | ||
| Is there any activities that helped? | ||
| I don't have to, like, have my girlfriend, you know, bore her with having sex for too long. | ||
| It helped that, you know, because it makes you... | ||
| Well, actually, it keeps you from getting it up. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| But I don't have that problem, so it does okay. | ||
| So the Paxil was helping you in a different way than the Prozac is? | ||
| I think it was the same thing. | ||
| I just didn't want to go back on Paxil because Paxil had a lot of weight gain. | ||
| So I went on Prozac and then gained the weight anyway. | ||
| And what was the difference in the way you felt on Paxil versus on Prozac? | ||
| Both of them honestly made me feel kind of like the same, which is just like a somewhat anxious person. | ||
| The problem was when I was on Paxil... | ||
| I thought I didn't need it, but the reason I thought I didn't need it is because I was on it. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| That's the problem with people who get off antidepressants. | ||
| They're like, well, I don't need it. | ||
| No, but that's because it's working. | ||
| So unless there's like a problem, I don't know. | ||
| When I got off of it, it was like a nightmare, that anxiety I had. | ||
| It was like truly like... | ||
| Especially having panic attacks on stage. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jesus. | |
| It's so shitty, because we all get anxiety, but usually I'd come to believe that anxiety leaves you once you get on stage. | ||
| Like, it's a comfort zone. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And I had lost that for a long time. | ||
| I, like, had panic, like, all throughout a set. | ||
| Jesus. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Yeah, it was awful. | ||
| Was there anything else that you tried that helped that at all? | ||
| You know, I tried to meditate. | ||
| Did that do anything? | ||
| It helps a little. | ||
| Honestly, the thing that helped the most was panic attacks on stage was just continuing to have them to the point where you notice it doesn't destroy the world. | ||
| Because I would actually still do okay on stage. | ||
| Actually, people wouldn't really notice. | ||
| Like, I'd go off after, like, that was horrible. | ||
| They're like, I don't even notice, you know? | ||
| Which makes you feel more alone, by the way. | ||
| The fact that you can have this hell in your head and no one notices. | ||
| And when you were doing this, were there sometimes you didn't have the hell in your head? | ||
| Or did it happen every time? | ||
| I think it happened for those three months like almost every time. | ||
| I mean, sometimes maybe not. | ||
| Or if I was doing a long set, like an hour, maybe it would go away after a while. | ||
| But I honestly think just having them and then realizing it's not a big deal, they can still do the show. | ||
| That made it go away. | ||
| The worst thing you can do with anxiety is run away from it. | ||
| If you're anxious when you go outside, the worst thing you can do is just not go outside, because then it builds. | ||
| If anyone has panic attacks on stage, just continuing to have them and letting your brain know that it's not a big deal, that it's not going to destroy you, then it starts to go away. | ||
| So now, you know, I'm back to not really having them on stage. | ||
| But yeah, it was tough. | ||
| Like, getting off medication was like a hard show. | ||
| I mean, I kind of wish I was never on it to begin with, you know? | ||
| Do you wish you were on Prozac to begin with? | ||
| Or do you think that, like, did something about taking the anti-anxiety medication accentuate it when you got off it? | ||
| Accentuate the... | ||
| Yeah, like the anxiety. | ||
| Did you have the same level of anxiety before you did Paxil that you had when you got off of it? | ||
| I think it was more like... | ||
| I mean, it's all a mystery, I guess. | ||
| Why exactly? | ||
| But I think it was more like all this anxiety... | ||
| It was this giant wave of anxiety that I just happened to have in my life. | ||
| I'd just come out with a special, and I was feeling this, like... | ||
| I had this urge to just, like, create more stuff. | ||
| You know that feeling you have where you just want to get out as much stuff because you're afraid you're going to die? | ||
| I had that urge kind of big. | ||
| I was like, I've got to do the next thing and the next thing. | ||
| And then, actually, the way it started, I was at my brother's place, and I looked in the mirror, and I saw these moles on my back, and I was just convinced they were skin cancer. | ||
| That's how it began. | ||
| And not like, I always had hypochondria, but this was different. | ||
| This was like, I knew I was going to die. | ||
| And then I went to the doctor, and they were like, it doesn't look like skin cancer. | ||
| And then the next day, I stood up and was dizzy, and was dizzy for like three months straight. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Yeah, I think it was... | ||
| A wave of anxiety just where I was in my life, but for the first time in 10 years, I didn't have something to mask it, which I think made it more intense. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| How long were you off it for? | ||
| About like four months, and then I slowly got on Prozac. | ||
| Maybe a little more. | ||
| So four months of hell. | ||
| Yeah, it was awful. | ||
| And it was just like, yeah, it was awful. | ||
| So did you have that level of anxiety when you were younger? | ||
| When I was really young, I would have these really bad screaming fits. | ||
| Like, when I was like eight or nine, I would just suddenly have these moments where I was like, I don't know, this moment of just feeling hopeless or something, I'd just start yelling. | ||
| And my parents never knew what it was. | ||
| I actually would cut myself a couple times on the leg just to distract it. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| And I had those, and I didn't know what it was. | ||
| And then in college, I also started doing cocaine, which didn't help. | ||
| And then I had some really bad... | ||
| Kind of anxiety in college, and that's when I went on Paxnel originally, you know? | ||
| Yeah, but no, I've always had like really bad anxiety. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Do you have anxiety? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| And it's so funny after this long thing. | ||
| Do you have anxiety? | ||
| You're like, no. | ||
| I can get it sometimes. | ||
| I can talk myself into it. | ||
| I can talk myself out of it. | ||
| I get anxiety about existential threats. | ||
| I get anxiety about war sometimes late at night. | ||
| I get anxiety about, like, the more I read about history, the more I understand, you know, how many times in history society was, everything was great, everything was fine, and then all of a sudden some terrible event took place, and then we went back to, like, the Stone Age. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| This is an imminent threat to life, that we look at the goings-on in the world as if it's, like, some plot in a television show that we're watching. | ||
| You're watching what's happening in Ukraine. | ||
| You're watching what's happening in Gaza. | ||
| And you're watching what's happening in Iran. | ||
| And you're watching all this crazy shit. | ||
| And it doesn't seem real because it hasn't affected you. | ||
| But late at night when everyone's asleep, that's when it gets me. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| All the horrors of everything? | ||
| I started thinking that this ridiculous life that we live and all the stupid societal conflicts that we have that are mostly meaningless and nonsense... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that they're accentuated constantly in the news. | ||
| All the while, real people are dying. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like drone suicide bombs. | ||
| You can watch them on YouTube. | ||
| While we're just having like culture war arguments. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, I've seen so many people die on Instagram reels. | ||
| So many people get blown up by missiles and blown up by drones and suicide drones slamming into people and Detonating them. | ||
| I watched this guy, some guy, I forget what part of the world it was, but he wore a suicide vest. | ||
| They tried to stop him and these guys run and they grab him and they all explode. | ||
| They're trying to stop him from pulling the vest and this bomb goes off and you see just parts of people flying and you're like, fuck man! | ||
| This is all happening in the world right now. | ||
| It's just not happening right here. | ||
| You're watching it and you're like, for some reason I'm really anxious right now. | ||
| Yeah, I get freaked out and I start thinking about just how fragile our civilization really is. | ||
| Yeah, oh yeah, it's completely fragile. | ||
| Yeah, and we're so soft. | ||
| We're so accustomed to living this way. | ||
| Like when the power went off earlier when we were doing this podcast, what did we do? | ||
| We wait for it to come back on. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah. | |
| Somebody's going to fix it. | ||
| What if it doesn't come back on? | ||
| Yeah, I used to have a bit about that. | ||
| Like when the dumb people outfuck the smart people and the power just goes off and no one has any idea how to turn it back on again. | ||
| Like what do you do? | ||
| Somebody does it. | ||
| They do it. | ||
| But what if that guy's dead? | ||
| Like do we know and when do we know? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| How long afterward do we figure out the power's not coming back? | ||
| Right, it is crazy. | ||
| The world's just functioning off of just this... | ||
| No one's really running the ship. | ||
| It's just a collective thing of functioning. | ||
| And we're connected by the most fragile thing we have, which is the power grid and our computer infrastructure. | ||
| All of it can be wiped out in one solar flare. | ||
| And we take it so much for granted. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's the only reason why we're alive. | ||
| It's 100 degrees outside, and I have a hoodie on. | ||
| I'm super comfortable in here. | ||
| We have air conditioning. | ||
| We're fine. | ||
| We're not dying of heat exhaustion. | ||
| We're not out there dehydrating to death. | ||
| We know where the water is. | ||
| It's like we've ignored the fact that nature can be a threat. | ||
| And we're just so vulnerable. | ||
| And we're so reliant to keep this civilization going the way it is. | ||
| Think about what we've been talking about today. | ||
| If you go back and watch films from the 1930s, how horrific people treat each other. | ||
| And over time, because of our access to all these different human beings and how they feel about things and how they discuss things, all that has kind of elevated our discourse and elevated the way we communicate with each other and we interact with each other and we demand more. | ||
| And there's going to be overcompensation and things are going to go back and forth, but generally it's moving in the right direction. | ||
| But that's only because all of our needs are met and because there's electricity. | ||
| You can go back at any time. | ||
| Yeah, so electricity is the thing that changed everything. | ||
| When you can stay cool and stay warm, you can live in places you shouldn't be living. | ||
| Yeah, there would be a hellhole to live in without anything. | ||
| Cities would be... | ||
| Unlivable. | ||
| All cities would be a hellhole. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's no food. | ||
| No one's growing food. | ||
| How do you eat? | ||
| As soon as trucks stop coming in, everyone's fucked. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's no food. | ||
| You have enough food for like a few hours of everybody eating, and then that's it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The Gaza stuff is awful. | ||
| It's horrifying. | ||
| It's created such a... | ||
| You know, I'm Jewish, obviously, if you can't tell. | ||
| I think you brought that up. | ||
| It's been such a complicated, horrible thing. | ||
| And it's just horrible all around. | ||
| It is complicated and horrible. | ||
| And it's also complicated when you see so much anti-Semitism. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know. | |
| Like open anti-Semitism about all Jews. | ||
| I know. | ||
| As if there's like this cabal of evil people that are pulling the strings. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I've posted... | ||
| I hate Netanyahu. | ||
| I hate the Israeli government. | ||
| I think both Gaza and Israel have been taken over by extremists. | ||
| But I've posted concern for anti-Semitism, and I've been attacked by people. | ||
| How can you be worried about that when people are dying in Gaza? | ||
| And I'm like, there's two different things. | ||
| Yeah, they're both real. | ||
| Yeah, they're both real. | ||
| And I have a right to be concerned. | ||
| Jews have a right to be a little nervy. | ||
| Some shit went down, I don't know if you remember. | ||
| Yeah, we have a right to get cautious, you know? | ||
| But it's also, that's one of the things that, I forget who was talking to us about this. | ||
| It might have been Jordan Peterson, but it was somebody. | ||
| When they were saying that it's one of the hallmarks of a civilization's decline. | ||
| They start blaming things on the Jews. | ||
| It is. | ||
| It's really common. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Because Jews stick together and it's a very difficult club to get into. | ||
| Well, I think what people have done too is there is an extremist faction in Israel who are like... | ||
| Awful. | ||
| Which, by the way, was being protested for months on end before October 7th. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Exactly. | |
| And what people aren't doing, they're not giving Israel the benefit of a conflicted soul. | ||
| And a lot of the anti-Zionist propaganda is making you think all of Israel is like that. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| But it's no different than another country like America. | ||
| It's a conflicted place. | ||
| There are extremists, and some of them are awful, and Netanyahu has put a lot of them in his government, made a coalition with them. | ||
| But there's also people who want peace, people who want Palestinian self-determination. | ||
| Like all human beings everywhere in the world, there's good people. | ||
| It's like if you hated Trump, but then you assume when he was president, everyone in America supported Trump, right? | ||
| Right. | ||
| If you thought that. | ||
| It's very dehumanizing to think all of Israel is just... | ||
| In support of the genocide in Gaza. | ||
| Right, and that's the Zionist term. | ||
| And then you see polls. | ||
| 65% of people say it's okay to rape Palestinian prisoners. | ||
| Who did you talk to? | ||
| Who did you talk to? | ||
| 65% of who? | ||
| Who the fuck is answering that poll? | ||
| Hey, let me ask you a couple questions about rape. | ||
| Who the fuck is answering that? | ||
| What are you talking about raping prisoners? | ||
| I'm all in. | ||
| By the way, I'm on my way to work. | ||
| I gotta go. | ||
| Well, yeah. | ||
| There's obviously a lot of horrible shit that Israel has done, but a lot of people go beyond that and make it... | ||
| It's fine to be like they don't think about civilians. | ||
| I understand that as a critique, but a lot of people want to make it look like they're going out of their way to just only kill civilians. | ||
| They have a goal. | ||
| It might be bad and reckless. | ||
| Yeah, but there's been things like the killing of the aid workers, you know, like the Jose Andres people, which seems like they were targeted. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It's hard to believe the purpose for that, the targeting. | ||
| To keep people from getting food to the Gaza refugees. | ||
| Yeah, I don't know. | ||
| I don't, like... | ||
| I don't have a position. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I'm just saying that that's the accusation, is that they knew who those people were. | ||
| I think Israel... | ||
| I think... | ||
| I don't... | ||
| It's hard for me to believe that that's where they're... | ||
| I do think they want to get rid of Hamas. | ||
| I think a lot of people have died. | ||
| It's awful. | ||
| And I don't think it's worth it, all this, at all. | ||
| But I don't think they're like... | ||
| You don't think that some people have a dehumanization way of looking at Palestinians? | ||
| Yeah, for sure, definitely. | ||
| Yeah, I think that's what you're looking at when you're seeing soldiers rape Palestinian prisoners. | ||
| You've seen that video? | ||
| Yeah, no, that camp is awful. | ||
| It's awful, truly a nightmare. | ||
| Look, whenever a human being is capable of doing something like that to another human being that they don't even know, they consider that person the other. | ||
| You've got a giant problem, and that's the giant problem of being able to just bomb Gaza into oblivion and kill who knows how many thousands of people. | ||
| It's almost like the United States' reaction after 9-11. | ||
| 9-11, the whole world was on our side. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Everybody wanted America to prosper. | ||
| We can't believe America was attacked. | ||
| America, this shining beacon of democracy and self-government. | ||
| Like, no, not America. | ||
| Then what do we do? | ||
| We invade Iraq. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And we kill a million people wind up dying because of our invasion, they think. | ||
| And then you think about the weapons of mass destruction hosts. | ||
| It was all bullshit. | ||
| It was paraded in the media. | ||
| So it's like that. | ||
| It's like our overreaction was so horrific, then everybody hated America. | ||
| I agree with that. | ||
| I do think what Hamas did was so horrific, and they said they're going to keep doing it, it did plant these seeds of hate in Israelis. | ||
| No doubt. | ||
| I'm in the position where, like, obviously this war is terrible and I don't think it should have happened, but I also think it's a lot to ask people to have something so horrific happen and not them kind of retaliate, though I'm against it, if that makes sense. | ||
| I know what you're saying, that people would retaliate. | ||
| It's the way they're retaliating and the scale, which is horrific to people. | ||
| But I also, yeah. | ||
| I mean, I think there's dehumanization on both sides. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| Well, the only way you can do October 7th is dehumanization. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Of course. | |
| And I do think people on both sides have tried to demean or trivialize the other person's accountability. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| And also people pretending as if they know what actually happened and what the stats are. | ||
| They didn't do that. | ||
| They didn't do this. | ||
| Are you on the ground? | ||
| To me saying like there's no rape then is like dehumanization. | ||
| All of it is crazy. | ||
| Like you don't fucking know what's actually going on. | ||
| And there's a lot of misinformation that's even printed in mainstream media like the bombing of the hospital. | ||
| There's a lot of shit that happened. | ||
| That was front page of the New York Times. | ||
| There's a lot of shit that happens in the fog of war that people want to know the answer right away. | ||
| I know it's upset, hard, but you have to wait sometimes. | ||
| Like, the fog of war, you're not going to always have the answer right away. | ||
| I mean, I'm not saying Israel isn't culpable of a lot of things, but you do have to wait. | ||
| I see people sharing information that's not verified all the time that just came out, where you're like, you don't... | ||
| Well, that's the hospital bombing. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| That's exactly what that is. | ||
| I mean, that made it all the way into newspapers. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| I mean, I think, like... | ||
| Netanyahu created a coalition with some really awful people like Smotrich and Ben-Gavir. | ||
| They are like really Jewish supremacists, real thugs. | ||
| And I think a lot of anti-Zionists have tried to convince everyone that all of Israel is like that. | ||
| And I just think, yeah, there needs to be less dehumanization and just seeing like... | ||
| Yeah, the suffering in Gaza is horrible. | ||
| It needs to stop. | ||
| And also, like, not every Israeli is part of some evil Zionist conspiracy. | ||
| That's its own inverted form of anti-Semitism. | ||
| Well, Netanyahu is this super pro-military guy. | ||
| I mean, he was a special forces guy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And he's corrupt and he has charges against him that he's trying to weaken the government to prevent from coming through. | ||
| And he made a coalition with two people who are truly awful, awful people. | ||
| And that is really almost... | ||
| These people want a theocracy in Israel. | ||
| But that's not all of Israel. | ||
| People have protested against that. | ||
| So that's my fear when I'm up in the middle of the night. | ||
| That this kind of shit is going on. | ||
| That any minute it could pop off and become a nuclear war. | ||
| I mean, that's a legitimate fear. | ||
| It's a legitimate fear. | ||
| I don't even know if that's anxiety. | ||
| Whatever it is, if you ask me if I get anxiety, that's my anxiety. | ||
| No, I totally see that. | ||
| When I get really freaked out, that's what freaks me out. | ||
| What freaks me out is that it could pop off at any minute, and then all of a sudden it's September 12th, you know? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But way bigger, way crazier, way scarier, way scarier. | ||
| And that hasn't happened since 1945, so we assume that it's not going to happen again. | ||
| Yeah, we had 20 good years, and now we think everything... | ||
| We had some good time in the 80s, and now we're like, yeah, it can never go back. | ||
| Oh, dude. | ||
| When the wall fell down, it was amazing. | ||
| There was like a weight lifted off of America. | ||
| Everybody was like, oh, Soviet Union's gone. | ||
| We don't have to worry about a nuclear war with Russia anymore. | ||
| And now it's China and Iran and fucking this and that. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| It is like most periods of history, people had kind of a shitty life and a volatile period of history. | ||
| After Vietnam and maybe to the, you know, now, until everything's kind of falling apart now, like, it was kind of smooth sailing, I guess, for a little bit. | ||
| As long as you're in America. | ||
| Well, yeah, it's not smooth sailing. | ||
| People are like, the 90s were great. | ||
| Rwanda, it was not smooth sailing. | ||
| There's a lot of places where it sucked bad. | ||
| Well, that's the other thing. | ||
| Yeah, it's never, it's been shitty for, it's always shitty for someone. | ||
| That's the thing is, we're not used to it happening right here. | ||
| We're very spoiled. | ||
| Oh, we're so spoiled. | ||
| Like, the Russians are so much more used to it than us. | ||
| They lost so many people during World War II. Oh yeah, like 20 million? | ||
| Well, I was reading this thing about France. | ||
| This is so crazy, that during World War I, France lost 25% of its fighting-age men, and then during World War II, they lost another 25%. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| What the fuck, man? | ||
| Well, that's the thing. | ||
| Life was so cheap, and now we feel like life is kind of expensive. | ||
| Now we're like, life has... | ||
| Value, you know? | ||
| But it's still so cheap for so many people. | ||
| Well, it is in other parts of the world. | ||
| That's the thing. | ||
| It's like we're so used to not being attacked that when something like 9-11 does happen, like Pearl Harbor happened, it was five hours over the ocean. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's the only other time we were attacked. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, we're so soft. | ||
| We are soft. | ||
| We're soft as baby poo. | ||
| But we're seeing a lot of violence. | ||
| I mean, we see every... | ||
| The guy who shot Trump, you see his head exploded on the roof. | ||
| You see everything. | ||
| What do you even think that was all about? | ||
| A guy trying to shoot Trump. | ||
| You don't think he had some help? | ||
| No. | ||
| No? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't think so. | |
| Do you think Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm not a big conspiracy theory guy. | ||
| So the Bill Hicks joke, you don't buy into it? | ||
| I love the joke. | ||
| You love the joke. | ||
| But I'm not a big conspiracy theory guy. | ||
| Have you ever read into that one? | ||
| I read a little, yeah. | ||
| You need to read more. | ||
| That's one you really shouldn't be flipping about. | ||
| They killed that fucking guy. | ||
| Here's the thing with Trump, though. | ||
| Why would he need... | ||
| So you thought Biden was trying to take him out? | ||
| I don't think it was Biden. | ||
| I think it could be a number of people that were involved. | ||
| But it seems, at the very least, like they were so... | ||
| lax in security that they were inviting something to happen, at the very least. | ||
| And knowing that that guy was walking around more than 30 minutes before with a rangefinder, seeing that guy, he'd come back and forth. | ||
| He observed him multiple times. | ||
| People were talking about him. | ||
| They were keeping an eye on him. | ||
| And this guy gets on the roof with a rifle and gets off three shots. | ||
| Well, my thing with a lot of conspiracy theories is it just kind of ignores the incompetence. | ||
| I feel like incompetence is a real thing. | ||
| Incompetence is a real theory. | ||
| You know what else is a real thing? | ||
| Conspiracies. | ||
| Those are real, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, some of them are real. | |
| The problem with dismissing conspiracies as being just a silly conspiracy theory, that was the whole goal of the Warren Commission report. | ||
| And that was when the term conspiracy theory got into the zeitgeist as a pejorative. | ||
| I don't dismiss... | ||
| And I didn't mean to offend. | ||
| No, you didn't offend. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| I don't dismiss... | ||
| There's a huge amount of corruption and horrible things. | ||
| I just think... | ||
| A lot of times incompetence does play a big part. | ||
| And I do think there is incompetence and there's randomness a lot. | ||
| Some dude had a really good joke about it that he put up on Instagram. | ||
| It was very funny. | ||
| Let me see if I can find it. | ||
| Maybe you can find it, Jamie. | ||
| He said that it was basically like if I thought they were going to try an assassination attempt, that seems exactly like how the government would do it. | ||
| Like really inefficient. | ||
| He said it was like the DMV of assassination attempts. | ||
| I find this dude. | ||
| Who sent that to me? | ||
| But it's also, I mean, I guess for me it's like you also have to like... | ||
| You find it? | ||
| I saw it recently too. | ||
| I know what you're talking about. | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| Somebody sent it to me. | ||
| I get too many texts. | ||
| Anything can be real, but I also think the idea that he was a lone shooter is not... | ||
| That world is not a crazy world. | ||
| The idea that we're in a violent place. | ||
| No, I'm not saying... | ||
| Everyone has guns. | ||
| No, not saying that he wasn't a lone shooter. | ||
| I think he was a lone shooter. | ||
| Maybe there was other people shooting on him. | ||
| I think he was trained. | ||
| I think somebody got him detonators. | ||
| He had sophisticated detonators and explosive devices. | ||
| You're like, lone shooter. | ||
| Betrayed by the movie. | ||
| I think someone talked that guy into doing that. | ||
| I don't think someone talked that guy into doing it. | ||
| I think it's possible. | ||
| That someone talked that kind of doing that. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, anything's possible. | ||
| I'm not, like, dismissing that. | ||
| I just think, like, he's like a school shooter who got political, you know what I mean? | ||
| They took his body away and cremated it 10 days after the assassination. | ||
| No toxicology report. | ||
| No public—there's been no press conference about it. | ||
| No telling all the details. | ||
| Here's what we know. | ||
| They went to the kid's house. | ||
| It was professionally scrubbed. | ||
| Didn't have silverware in it. | ||
| Right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| There's a phone that was going back and forth because, you know, they have ad data. | ||
| They can track cell phone when they ping. | ||
| There's a phone going back and forth between the offices of the FBI in Washington D.C. and this kid's house on multiple occasions. | ||
| Yeah, I don't know about that, but I don't know. | ||
| That's where things get weird, right? | ||
| You'd hate me with my views. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| I don't even think Epstein... | ||
| I would not hate you with your views. | ||
| I'm like the opposite of a conspiracy theorist. | ||
| That's interesting. | ||
| So you think Epstein killed himself? | ||
| I'm not saying he definitely killed himself, but I also think it is believable that he is a little depressed at that point. | ||
| Certainly. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| That's what I think. | ||
| I think, like, the possible... | ||
| I think the possibility of it not being a conspiracy is sometimes very plausible to the point where I don't know if you need to go to a conspiracy. | ||
| Maybe he got killed, but Epstein was also not in a great place at that point. | ||
| True. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| So I could see that both ways. | ||
| But then you have to look at the autopsy. | ||
| You have to look at the ligature marks around the base of his neck, which is not really what happens when you hang yourself. | ||
| When you hang yourself, your weight of your body is what kills you. | ||
| So the ligature marks, the strangulation marks are underneath the chin. | ||
| His was down by his neck, and his neck was actually fractured, which is also indicative of someone getting strangled to death. | ||
| Dr. Michael Badden who's that a forensic scientist that did that show autopsy remember that show yeah HBO he examined the the Autopsy examined what what the results were and he found that the fractures in the neck were indicative of someone being strangled to death But was it another corner who said it was like sure? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh Sure. | |
| First coroner. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, why can't we believe that guy? | ||
| Well, it seems very convenient that the cameras went out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It seems very convenient that the people that were on security were asleep. | ||
| It seems very convenient. | ||
| All of it seems convenient. | ||
| Yeah, no, I'm not saying he didn't get killed. | ||
| Seems to be the most high-profile defense witness in a very important case that might have been about elites and child pedophilia would probably want to take that guy out. | ||
| But also, a narcissist who's about to be the most hated person in the world, I could see him killing himself. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| I'm not saying he didn't kill. | ||
| He could have killed himself. | ||
| I mean, he could have been killed. | ||
| So how long have you been working for the government? | ||
| You hate me now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't hate you. | |
| I think Oswald acted alone. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I'm a believer in incompetence and that everyone is... | ||
| Most people are bad at their job. | ||
| Did you ever watch the Zapruder film? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| The film of Kennedy's head going back into the left? | ||
| Of course. | ||
| How do you think that happens when you get shot from behind? | ||
| What do you mean? | ||
| His head goes back into the left like he got shot from the front. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| That was a Hicks bit. | ||
| Back and to the left. | ||
| But I also think they've tried so long to find the conspiracy for that, and it always kind of comes to a dead end. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I think what Oswald did was... | ||
| I like the way you think. | ||
| You don't want to think about it this way. | ||
| I like it. | ||
| I like what you're saying. | ||
| Well, to me, I think... | ||
| A lot of conspiracy theorists think like the other person. | ||
| Like, I'm naive, right? | ||
| But I think it's the opposite. | ||
| I think like... | ||
| It sometimes can be naive to think there's someone masterminding everything. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Like, to me, I think, like... | ||
| And I don't know all the evidence. | ||
| I'm sure there's all these reports and stuff. | ||
| But, like, to me, I think, like, sometimes crazy shit happens. | ||
| And when you look at it backwards, it doesn't... | ||
| Yeah, it's crazy that he shot someone from that far and it worked, you know what I mean? | ||
| That's true. | ||
| But it's also, crazy shit happens, and we also have never seen, a lot of times stuff happens where we've never seen that, like 9-11. | ||
| We never had two planes hit a building, but you immediately had people being like, buildings don't fall like that. | ||
| It's like, this is the That's true. | ||
| So it's like, we don't always know, like, it's a lot of times something happening that's crazy, but also, like, never happened before, that people are like, that's not how it happens. | ||
| But it's like, how do you know? | ||
| That's true. | ||
| Like, planes flying into the buildings, especially buildings that are that tall. | ||
| That's all true. | ||
| And I do think, you know, I've read, you know, it was 9-11, there was so much incompetence as a government, a lack of communication between the FBI and the CIA, you know? | ||
| And I'm a firm, I'm not saying some conspiracies aren't true, definitely. | ||
| And there's a lot of corruption. | ||
| But I'm just a firm believer in incompetence. | ||
| Incompetence is real, but conspiracies are too. | ||
| Some conspiracies are real, yeah. | ||
| The Lee Harvey Oswald one, when you look into it, it's pretty nutty. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's pretty nutty. | ||
| A lot of people heard shots from the grassy knoll. | ||
| The amount of people that were eyewitnesses that died in mysterious ways is extraordinary, like off the charts. | ||
| Odds. | ||
| Like, that don't make any sense. | ||
| But I also do think sometimes the brain, like, finds patterns that aren't always... | ||
| Sure. | ||
| And also, people kill people. | ||
| That happens, too. | ||
| Yeah, both. | ||
| The thing about the Oswald thing is there's also a lot of evidence that points to the fact that they were trying to come to the conclusion that there was a lone gunman despite the evidence. | ||
| And one of those is the magic bullet theory. | ||
| The magic bullet theory is fucking cuckoo for Cocoa Buffs. | ||
| That shit would never fly today. | ||
| What is it the bullet went through? | ||
| He went through Kennedy and then into Connelly and then they found it in pristine condition on the gurney and then they attributed that bullet to all these wounds because they had to because there was only three shots supposedly and in those three shots that Oswald was able to get off they knew one of them hit the back And they knew one of them was hit Connelly, and one of them blew up his head. | ||
| Well, they had all different bullets for these things, for these different injuries, but then a guy got hit with a ricochet in the underpass, so they had to account for one of those bullets missing the target and hitting the, whatever it is, granite curbstone, and banging into this guy's face, and the guy had to go to the hospital. | ||
| They found the curbstone that had been hit with a bullet, And so they knew that a ricochet had hit there, so now they had two bullets that had to have all these wounds. | ||
| And so instead of saying, hey, maybe there's more than one person shooting, maybe there's more than this one guy that was in the book depository, all these people said there were shots coming from the grassy knoll, maybe they were telling the truth. | ||
| Instead of that, they said, no, no, no, no, no. | ||
| One bullet went crazy and went, oh, look, we found it! | ||
| Here's the bullet. | ||
| All good. | ||
| And look at the bullet. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All right, I'll give you Oswald if you give me the Trump shooter. | |
| That bullet supposedly went through two people, and they found it in that condition on a gurney. | ||
| If you've ever shot anything with a bullet, you know that's straight horse shit. | ||
| That's not deformed at all. | ||
| That's shattered bones. | ||
| That's nonsense. | ||
| But what is the answer? | ||
| I feel like there's so many answers about what happened, right? | ||
| Well, if you read the Warren Commission Report — and fucking nobody has — that's also — there's different — like, see the hole in his neck? | ||
| It's supposed to have gone through his back, through his neck. | ||
| But in the first autopsy report, that hole in the neck was thought of as an entrance wound. | ||
| And then when it got to Bethesda, Maryland, then they said it was a tracheotomy hole. | ||
| There's, like, a lot of inconsistencies in the Warren Commission report. | ||
| And if you want to go crazy, read a book called Best Evidence by David Lifton, who was an accountant who read the entire Warren Commission, went over it, and found all these inconsistencies and said they were just trying to come to this one conclusion, and he didn't buy it. | ||
| But I'll check it out. | ||
| Inconsistencies are also part of incompetence or not communicating as well, can it? | ||
| Inconsistencies, yeah. | ||
| I mean like people having different reports that don't – or even him trying to force something. | ||
| I mean like I just think sometimes like the thing has to be – like nothing's perfect and there is like a lot of – I also don't think Lee Harvey Oswald – I think Lee Harvey Oswald was a part of it. | ||
| I don't think he acted alone. | ||
| I think he was the guy that they were pinning it on. | ||
| Well, he was definitely active with the CIA. He'd gone over to Russia. | ||
| He'd married a Russian woman, came back to America. | ||
| He was doing a lot of weird communist shit. | ||
| He was involved in a lot of weird stuff that seemed to indicate that he was some sort of intelligence agent. | ||
| Or at least... | ||
| A patsy. | ||
| A guy that could pin this on, which is probably what they want to do. | ||
| I'm not denying it that it could happen. | ||
| I guess that it's a possibility. | ||
| I guess for me it's just like, usually when there is something, a conspiracy, it does get found out. | ||
| There's concrete evidence. | ||
| There was no internet back then, and they didn't even see the Zapruder film until 12 years later. | ||
| It's a pretty film, nobody even saw it until it was on the Geraldo Rivera show in 1975 when Dick Gregory brought it on. | ||
| So you know what I read in the Seymour, what's his name, he did a book about Camelot? | ||
| That apparently Kennedy was fucking someone at the pool and pulled his groin. | ||
| Have you read this two days beforehand? | ||
| And he had like a back brace on. | ||
| And when he got shot, because he got shot twice, right? | ||
| He got shot, well, yeah, at least twice. | ||
| They think three times. | ||
| They think that's one through the back, one through the neck, and one in the head. | ||
| But I heard they said, like, because of the back brace, when he got shot the first time, it didn't push him over. | ||
| So it's kind of like a sitting duck. | ||
| Have you heard that? | ||
| No, but that kind of makes sense. | ||
| So, like, the back brace almost kept him up with the shot. | ||
| Well, yeah, he was all fucked up. | ||
| He had a lot of like real physical problems. | ||
| He was in constant pain. | ||
| And he was also a guy that was getting treatment from Dr. Feelgood. | ||
| Yeah, that's where Dr. Feelgood came from. | ||
| My psychiatrist? | ||
| Yeah, real similar. | ||
| Like this one doctor. | ||
| And I think a lot of that was meth as well. | ||
| It was a habit of wearing a tightly laced back brace that may have kept him from recoiling to the floor of his car after the assassin's first bullet to the neck, setting him up for the kill shot. | ||
| The brace was firm. | ||
| So this is not the back shot. | ||
| There was a shot in the neck that, again, the initial autopsy said was an entrance wound. | ||
| Yeah, that makes sense. | ||
| Tightly laced. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Makes sense that it kept him stiff. | ||
| He was all fucked up though. | ||
| He had like, yeah, see portrait of pain. | ||
| See, he had like some real serious problems. | ||
| Numerous back surgeries. | ||
| So they hid. | ||
| It's hard to hide news photos of him walking on crutches before and after one of his numerous back surgeries. | ||
| It wasn't until 2002 when historian Robert Dalek was allowed access to a collection of documents spanning 1955 to 1963. In 1963, the specifics began to emerge. | ||
| Peyton is co-author, neurosurgeon Dr. Justin Dowdy, poured over Dalek's subsequent book, numerous other biographies, and scores of documents and x-rays at the JFK Library in Boston to prepare their paper. | ||
| So I was taken aback by the depths of Kennedy's pain. | ||
| He said how long he dealt with the pain despite his short life, how it affected his life. | ||
| I was able to conceal most of that from the public and certainly from his political adversaries. | ||
| So I wonder what back surgeries were they doing in 1963. Good Lord. | ||
| It's got to be brutal. | ||
| He had scarlet fever at age 2. Spent his teenage years in and out of hospitals with abdominal and joint pain. | ||
| Food-like symptoms and extreme weight loss. | ||
| Age 15 weighed a mere 117 pounds. | ||
| By the next year, worried he might have leukemia, doctors began regularly checking his blood. | ||
| So he was all fucked up, man. | ||
| So he was a sick dude. | ||
| But sometimes I think there's different explanations that aren't that sexy. | ||
| Here's not sexy. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Yesterday I went through the most harassing experience of my life. | ||
| An iron tube, 12 inches long, in one inch diameter, up my ass. | ||
| My poor bedraggled rectum, oh my god, is looking at me very reproachfully these days. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| He was great with words. | ||
| Bro, he was fucked up. | ||
| He could have been a comic. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| So he got a football game, got tackled from the side, possibly damaging a spinal disc. | ||
| Again, regularly using a corset brace to stabilize his spine and control his discomfort. | ||
| So yeah, he was all fucked up. | ||
| But it's like there's things like when things don't make sense, there are sometimes an explanation that's kind of like almost boring or random. | ||
| It's like the thing with Zapruder. | ||
| I think it's Zapruder. | ||
| The person puts the umbrella up. | ||
| Is that in Zapruder? | ||
| There's a guy who has an umbrella up and it's not raining. | ||
| And for years... | ||
| They thought he might have been involved signaling. | ||
| And they finally find the guy. | ||
| They bring him in front of everyone. | ||
| And he's like, I'm British. | ||
| And in England, it's a real fuck you when you raise your umbrella when a car's driving by. | ||
| And he hated Kennedy. | ||
| So he was just doing a fuck you. | ||
| But then for years, people were like, Oh, that was part of the signal. | ||
| I mean, I'm not saying some conspiracies aren't true. | ||
| I just think there's sometimes other reasons that get lost. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| Certainly people look for things that aren't there. | ||
| I've read conspiracies about me, and I'm like, this is hilarious. | ||
| Well, you know they're not true. | ||
| But it's weird when you read them about you, and you're like, oh, this is how this works. | ||
| People just make shit up, and they just run with it. | ||
| What's the one about you? | ||
| Oh, just nonsense. | ||
| Being handled by the CIA, being a part of the Illuminati, all kinds of stupid shit. | ||
| Throwing people off your trail by being into conspiracy theories so people don't realize you're part of the CIA? Well, they just want to think you're controlled. | ||
| They want to think that at a certain point someone comes to you and you get controlled. | ||
| But that's not real. | ||
| No. | ||
| The reality is no one's in control. | ||
| To me, that's the darkest reality. | ||
| Also, the reality is MKUltra was real, and they really were trying to teach people how to kill people, and they did it with Charlie Manson. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, yeah, yeah. | |
| I mean, there's definitely real horrible fucked up shit. | ||
| I'm not saying that. | ||
| I'm not saying there's not fucked up horrible shit, but I do think no one's really steering the ship, and that's like the really scary thing. | ||
|
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|
Right. | |
| I think our idea is that there's this one group of people that all agree with each other. | ||
| I don't think that's real. | ||
| I think there's competing factions even at the top levels. | ||
| I think they're always battling with each other. | ||
|
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|
Yes. | |
| Look, the people in the Navy sometimes don't like the people in the Army. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| This is the CIA and the FBI. The CIA not communicating with the FBI. Yeah, that's 100% real. | ||
| And that's why when people look at all of Israelis, not to bring it back to them like a Jew, as like a Zionist conspiracy, you're now doing that. | ||
| You're believing in this collective thing when really there's so many different types of Israelis. | ||
| There's extremists, there's racists, and there's peaceniks. | ||
| There's people who believe in peace. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| I think you always have to be wary of like thinking everything's monolithic. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| And I feel like that about the intelligence agencies as well. | ||
| I feel like, yeah, you want the CIA. You want someone who's paying attention to terrorist plots. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| You want them. | ||
| You want the FBI to be able to investigate when someone's done something horrible. | ||
| Yeah, of course. | ||
| You want those things. | ||
| You just don't want them out of control. | ||
| And the problem is absolute power corrupts absolutely. | ||
| And when some people get into certain positions of power, they use whatever means necessary to maintain it. | ||
| I mean, the Nazis had the ultimate conspiracy when they invaded Poland. | ||
| They, like, killed a bunch of their own, like, prisoner of wars and had them dressed as Polish, like, soldiers and, like, concocted a whole fake attack by Poland. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| I mean, it's the ultimate conspiracy. | ||
| Hitler burned the Reichstag. | ||
| We actually never know who did it. | ||
| No? | ||
| Well, some people actually do think it was the Marxists. | ||
| But we don't actually know for sure, yeah. | ||
| I thought it was just generally assumed that it was Hitler. | ||
| I think there's still some mystery. | ||
| I think some people, there was one guy who they say might have lit the fire, I forget what his name, I read this in a book, but like Hitler definitely jumped on it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Immediately. | ||
| Well, it was a time old tactic. | ||
| I mean, Nero burned Rome. | ||
| I don't know, he might have, but I think there's still some mystery about what, because some people think it might have been someone else, but then he just kind of jumped on it. | ||
| You mean Hitler or Nero? | ||
| Hitler. | ||
| Nero. | ||
| You know what else Nero did? | ||
| When his wife died, he found some slave boy that looked like his wife and had her castrated and paraded her around as his wife. | ||
| Did he fuck the kid? | ||
| I don't know what he did. | ||
| Probably did. | ||
| I mean, imagine he decided you're going to be my wife now. | ||
| I'm going to chop your dick off and bring you out in public. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Back then he was probably excited. | ||
| I believe the kid killed himself. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| A couple years later. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| See if you can find that story. | ||
| It is a crazy story. | ||
| He found some slave boy that looked like his wife. | ||
| And so, you know, back then, you're looking at him on the balcony. | ||
| You're one of the peasants in the street. | ||
| You know what he knew? | ||
| Yeah, he's just like... | ||
| It wasn't his wife anymore. | ||
| Like, he didn't want anybody to know his wife died, so he decided to make this fucking... | ||
| This slave boy looked like his wife. | ||
| He couldn't find a woman who looked like his wife? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Did he ask that kid if he had a sister? | ||
| Look, this is Nero, dude. | ||
| This is Caligula. | ||
| This dude was out of his fucking mind. | ||
| I actually don't know much about Nero. | ||
| Sporus was a young slave boy whom the Roman Emperor Nero had castrated and married as his empress. | ||
| Under his tour of Greece in 66 to 67 CE, allegedly in order for him to play the role of his wife, Popeya Sabina, who had died the previous year. | ||
| Ancient historians generally portray this relationship between Nero and Sporus as an abomination. | ||
| How do you say that name? | ||
| Suetonius? | ||
| Suetonius places his account in the Nero-Sporus relationship in his scandalous accounts of Nero's sexual aberrations between his raping a vestal virgin and committing incest with his mother. | ||
| Some think Nero used his marriage to Sporus to assuage the guilt he felt for allegedly kicking his pregnant wife Pompeia to death. | ||
| Hopefully he was really, really sorry. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Dio Cassios, in a more detailed account, writes that Sporus bore an uncanny resemblance to Bopoea and that Nero called Sporus by her name. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| I should make a movie about that kid. | ||
| Oh, look at this. | ||
| Scholars have deduced that sporus was likely an epithet given to him when his abuse started, considering it to be derived from the Greek word sporus, meaning seed or semen, which may refer to his inability to have children following his castration. | ||
| What the fuck, dude? | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| How crazy was that guy? | ||
| They should make a movie about that kid. | ||
| That'd be a good movie. | ||
| From the kid's perspective. | ||
| You do like dark things. | ||
| That'd be a good movie! | ||
| That's the darkest guy. | ||
| First he has to accept that he may have some girly features. | ||
| And then he has to... | ||
| Bro. | ||
| Make it a rom-com. | ||
| But it's just like, what was society like back then? | ||
| Because... | ||
| They all had sex with kids. | ||
| Fucked a lot of kids. | ||
| Fucked a lot of kids. | ||
| It was normal for like an intellectual to have a young boy that he would fuck. | ||
| I think it was gay to fuck your wife. | ||
| I think people would be like, I'm going home to my wife. | ||
| They're like, what are you, gay? | ||
| Go fuck a little boy like us. | ||
| It was like a gay thing to fuck your wife. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It was in. | ||
| Fucking kids was like fashion. | ||
| And also, how about the Spartans? | ||
| The greatest warriors ever. | ||
| They all fucked each other. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Greeks were very tough and very not homophobic. | ||
| They didn't care who they fucked. | ||
| They were just fucking anybody. | ||
| But that was a part of masculinity. | ||
| Fucking a guy was masculine. | ||
| You were like, I'm tough, I fight, I fuck guys. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Imagine if that kept going and guys were just fucking guys today. | ||
| Well, in the Nazis, what was the guy who was gay, Eric? | ||
| I mean, what was his name? | ||
| General Rahmer or whatever his name was. | ||
| The one part of the original SA that they killed in the Night of the Long Knives. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| He was gay and he was the toughest as they came. | ||
| And there was a bunch of gay people in his division, yeah. | ||
| Well, the idea of the Spartans was that you would fight for your lover much harder than you'd fight for a friend. | ||
| Oh really? | ||
| Yeah, this man beside you, not only is he with you in this war, he's a fellow soldier, but he's also your lover. | ||
| So are you saying... | ||
| I was thinking they wanted to fuck each other. | ||
| Is it more like the general was like, I need you all to fuck each other? | ||
| I think they wanted to fuck each other, too. | ||
| They wanted to fuck each other, too. | ||
| I think they just got used to fucking guys. | ||
| I think it's probably one of those... | ||
| Like, guys are so gross. | ||
| That's the thing about prison, right? | ||
| There's no women around. | ||
| We just fuck each other. | ||
| I'm reading further into the sports thing. | ||
| It gets a little weirder, I guess. | ||
| I mean... | ||
| He was already married to someone else after his wife died. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Satalina Messalina. | ||
| And then later married Sporus that year. | ||
| Who said to bear remarkable resemblance to Pompeia. | ||
| But then... | ||
| He took Sporus to Greece and then back to Rome, making Calvia Caspinilia serve as his mistress of wardrobe to Sporus. | ||
| Nero had earlier married another freedman, Pythagoras, Who had played the role of Nero's husband? | ||
| Now Sporus played the role of Nero's wife. | ||
| What? | ||
| He was just wild! | ||
| Nero died before Sporus died, too. | ||
| Oh my god, he was just wild. | ||
| And then Sporus went to somebody else. | ||
| As a wife still? | ||
| And Papaya was married to this person before Nero got her, and Nero made them get divorced, took Papaya, apparently killed her, and then Sporus went back to this guy, Nymphidus Sabinus. | ||
| Oh my god, Nympho. | ||
| Who had persuaded the Praetorian Guard to desert Nero. | ||
| Nymphidius treated Sporus as a wife and called him Pompeia. | ||
| So called him Nero's ex-wife, who Nero kicked to death, who he used to be married to. | ||
| What the fuck? | ||
| Imagine that poor kid. | ||
| He's just blessed with good genetics. | ||
| Got a pretty face. | ||
| Got a pretty face. | ||
| Cut your dick off and just fuck you and they pass you around. | ||
| Talk like my wife. | ||
| I'm going to change your name again, kid. | ||
| This is why he killed himself. | ||
| It's because someone else who beat that guy was going to use spores as a victim in public entertainment as a reenactment of a rape of someone in the underworld is what that is. | ||
| The rape of prosperity. | ||
| Proserpina. | ||
| The rape of Proserpina at a gladiator show. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| So he avoided this public humiliation by committing suicide. | ||
| So they were gonna violently rape him and kill him in a gladiator show. | ||
| So he finally gets free of the shit and then they're like, we want you to reenact it now. | ||
| We're gonna make you die in a gladiator show. | ||
| I guess that's not the first time they did that. | ||
| He probably knew what was coming, so he's probably like, fuck that. | ||
| I'm not going through that. | ||
| He probably saw so many people get fucked up in gladiator shows. | ||
| Why do they feel the need to publicly humiliate him? | ||
| Haven't he been through that? | ||
| Kick a man while he's down, I guess. | ||
| He's getting a little cocky. | ||
| Oh, life back then. | ||
| I mean, this is the thing. | ||
| It's like, they thought they were pretty progressive when they were just spanking women. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| In those stupid movies. | ||
| Well, you don't know. | ||
| Yeah, you don't know. | ||
| Give me a little hammer to spank her in the ass. | ||
| Oh, here you go. | ||
| It was normal. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| At least she didn't cut her dick off. | ||
| Well, you know, we do move at our own pace, and it's like, people act like people suck now, like we're awful, but we are getting better. | ||
| We are way better than those days. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We are getting better. | |
| We're way better than the Nero. | ||
| If you just read that account, and imagine if Biden did that. | ||
| Imagine if Biden's wife died, so he found some fucking page that looked like his wife, had him cut his dick off, and brought him to Greece as his wife. | ||
| He'd be like, this guy's a maniac. | ||
| This guy's out of his fucking mind. | ||
| We're freaked out when he sniffs hair. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Exactly. | ||
| We're like, he's getting too close to that hair. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look how he's smelling those kids. | |
| Imagine. | ||
| That was insane. | ||
| It was good to be a king back then. | ||
| You really could chew whatever you wanted. | ||
| It didn't last long. | ||
| Eventually it came for you. | ||
| What happened to him? | ||
| He got executed? | ||
| What happened to Nero? | ||
| How did he die? | ||
| Looking into this a little more, it says this, like, because of how crazy it's sounding, I'm starting to go, like, maybe whoever killed him is just like, you know, we're going to smear him, and we're going to make up all this shit about him that's not maybe accurate, but who's going to fucking defend it? | ||
| Right, but the Nero story, that's like a historical record, the story that took Sporus and did that to him. | ||
| I found a New Yorker article from 2021 that says, like, how nasty was he really? | ||
| Isn't that notorious? | ||
| How nasty was Nero really? | ||
| Oh my God, Nero apologists. | ||
| They're going to be writing that about Hitler someday. | ||
| Might have been a smear It was just the oxycodone. | ||
| It wasn't Hitler. | ||
| Yeah, sorry, he was on really good pot. | ||
| Really poached in pot and made him fuck his wife. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He got some 29% THC. The weed was strong, and he only had taken weed a couple times. | |
| Yeah, you can't fault him for killing all the Jews. | ||
| He really did think they were evil while he was tripping balls. | ||
| Sorry. | ||
| That's a crazy thing to be like. | ||
| Kill six million Jews. | ||
| Well, I was on painkillers. | ||
| I was on Oxys, guys. | ||
| I was on a lot of painkillers. | ||
| And a bad doctor. | ||
| What, Jamie? | ||
| What were you saying? | ||
| After he had sex with his mom, he killed her, too. | ||
| They didn't mention that. | ||
| Oh, whoops. | ||
| Yeah, bad guy. | ||
| I'd say bad guy. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| That's pretty safe to say. | ||
| That's not a conspiracy. | ||
| I'm not into the... | ||
| I'm not going to try to... | ||
|
unidentified
|
You can't say incompetence for that one. | |
| I think that guy was probably a really bad guy. | ||
| No, that was a bad guy. | ||
| I think when you were the king back then, you could do whatever the fuck you wanted, which is part of the problem. | ||
| Yeah, that's the other thing. | ||
| You had so much power over people. | ||
| I think anyone put in that position would just do whatever the fuck they wanted. | ||
| You know the Elizabeth Bathory story? | ||
| No. | ||
| Elizabeth, so this is a very controversial story, too. | ||
| I just know about Hitler. | ||
| I don't know about it. | ||
| This lady, so this is the folklore. | ||
| There's two different versions of this. | ||
| So the story that gets handed down was this woman was so evil that she was a serial killer, and she was beautiful when she was young, and as she got older, she would slaughter young maids and put them in a bathtub and bathe in their blood to try to rejuvenate. | ||
| Oh, I remember this. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I've been reading this. | ||
| But then the revisionist approach to it was that they accused her of all these things so that they could take her land. | ||
| And they imprisoned her because she was a royal. | ||
| So they imprisoned her under house arrest. | ||
| They locked her up in a castle. | ||
| They locked her up in a room in the castle for the rest of her life until she died. | ||
| And they think that this possibly could be false accusations against her that were so horrific that no one would question them so that they could take her land. | ||
| Oh, so she didn't do it? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| We don't know. | ||
| I mean, if they did smear her with this fake thing, it's a crazy accusation. | ||
| You want it to be true, though, don't you? | ||
| Of course. | ||
| You want to think there's some lady that is so vain and evil that she slaughters all the beautiful young ladies. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that these women started going missing. | ||
| See if you can find that story. | ||
| It's kind of crazy. | ||
| I used to be super into serial killers. | ||
| Like, before it was cool. | ||
| When did you start? | ||
| Who got you first? | ||
| Well, first of all, I was really into Kemper, the guy in the Mindhunter series. | ||
| I was into him before. | ||
| Now he's like, everyone knows him. | ||
| I'm a little disappointed. | ||
| I was into him. | ||
| He's mainstream now. | ||
| He's sold out. | ||
| Back when I was into it, I was creeping people out. | ||
| It was cool. | ||
| It was old school days. | ||
| My favorite story is Ed Gein. | ||
| There's a story that someone came to his house once to borrow sugar or some shit. | ||
| And he came inside and there was a skull that Ed Gein of someone who had killed on a shelf. | ||
| And the guy's like, what the fuck is that? | ||
| And Ed Gein, you know, it's like the 50s, right? | ||
| Ed Gein just kind of like freaks out and just lies. | ||
| He just goes, oh, that's a Japanese guy I killed in the war, brought him back. | ||
| And the other guy's like, huh, thank God. | ||
| For a second I thought it was something creepy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jesus Christ. | |
| Isn't that crazy? | ||
| That is crazy. | ||
| Imagine you could take a Japanese guy's head home with you. | ||
| And everyone's just like... | ||
| And everyone's like, yeah, it's fine. | ||
| I was a Japanese guy. | ||
| The case of Elizabeth Bathory inspired numerous stories during the 18th and 19th centuries. | ||
| The most common motif of these works is that the countless bathing in her virgin victim's blood to retain beauty or youth. | ||
| The legend appeared in print for the first time in 1729 in the Jesuit scholar Laszlo Turoksi, maybe? | ||
| Tragica Historia was written the first account of the Bathory case. | ||
| The story came into question in 1817 when the witness accounts, which had surfaced in 1765, were published for the first time. | ||
| They included no references to bloodbaths in his book Hungary and Transylvania, published in 1850. John Paget describes the supposed origins of Bathory's bloodbathing, although his tale seems to be fictionalized recitation of oral history from the area. | ||
| It's difficult to know how accurate his account of events is. | ||
| Sadistic pleasures is considered a far more plausible motive for Bathory's crimes. | ||
| Oh, so they're saying that she did do it. | ||
| Bathory's been labeled by Guinness Book of World Records the most prolific female murderer, although the number of her victims is debated. | ||
| So, this Wikipedia, though... | ||
| Yeah, I think there was another article that Elizabeth Bathory was, like, Google Elizabeth Bathory was innocent. | ||
| I found this, but this didn't have a link. | ||
| link. | ||
| It's just someone talking about it on Reddit, which says... | ||
| Was never a serial killer. | ||
| The myth and stories about her were made up by the Hungarian nobleman who first falsely accused her, then prosecuted her based on false evidence that was mostly hearsay. | ||
| Later they got her servants to make proof against her by forcing them to say they saw the killings of young girls while they tortured them. | ||
| This was because the wild dislike she got in those circles because of how well she treated her What is that? | ||
| Jobagi? | ||
| I don't know how to translate. | ||
| Basically, farmers who worked for her on the land, for a house, and a portion of what they made. | ||
| Making a bad example, and she was simply kind to commoners, something noblemen just loathed. | ||
| This also helped them, after she got locked up, they seized her estate. | ||
| So she was actually just like a nice person. | ||
| Yeah, that seems a little fishy, too. | ||
| It's disappointing, though, you know? | ||
| Who fucking knows? | ||
| You know, it's too many years ago. | ||
| We don't even know what happened in 1963 with the Kennedy assassination. | ||
| You know, I take a bath every day. | ||
| Not a bloodbath, but I love baths. | ||
| Baths are nice. | ||
| I love them, yeah. | ||
| It's like my place away from my phone and stuff. | ||
| Yeah, if you could live 100 years ago, a fucking hot shower is a miracle. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| A hot shower is a wonderful pleasure that we just completely take for granted. | ||
| To sit in that shower like, ah, soap and lather up, wash your feet and wash your face, and ah, your underarms, ah, bathe in this preheated warm water. | ||
| It's wonderful. | ||
| We do cold plungers for fun. | ||
| That's like all people had back then. | ||
|
unidentified
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That's it. | |
| I love the cold plungers. | ||
| Yeah, if you wanted to wash your dirty ass, you had to get in that fucking lake. | ||
| Hey dude, it's been really fun talking to you, man. | ||
| It was a really good time. | ||
| Thanks for doing this. | ||
| I really enjoyed it. | ||
| Can I plug a couple things? | ||
| Yeah, plug away. | ||
| Plug away. | ||
| What do you got? | ||
| This was awesome, by the way. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| I hope you had fun. | ||
| I did. | ||
| I had a great time. | ||
| I enjoyed it very much. | ||
| Well, definitely check out my special Brave came out not too long ago on YouTube called Brave. | ||
| Also, I just made a movie. | ||
| Oh yeah, there it is. | ||
| Filmed at the Comedy Cellar. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| Jason Katz and James Webb filled it. | ||
| Great directors. | ||
| Beautiful. | ||
| And I also just made a movie. | ||
| We just kind of made the trailer. | ||
| It's about a serial killer called Memory Room. | ||
| You do like it dark, huh? | ||
| I like it dark. | ||
| Memory Room. | ||
| It's a movie I made with my brilliant co-director Dan McCabe. | ||
| Is it a comedy? | ||
| No, it's about a caretaker. | ||
| It's like a 25-minute thriller about a caretaker who's taking care of a guy with dementia. | ||
| And one day they're listening to music, and he seems to really like the song. | ||
| And she's like, oh, do you remember that song? | ||
| And he's like, that song was playing in the night I strangled Rosie. | ||
| He kind of just says it out of nowhere. | ||
| And she starts investigating whether he actually killed someone or not. | ||
| And yeah, we just filmed it. | ||
| Are you the serial killer? | ||
| No, we got a great actor, Hal Robinson. | ||
| Did you think about playing it? | ||
| You did. | ||
| That's why you're laughing. | ||
| Well, I tell you, at one point, he was talking about killing someone in it, and he looked a little too upset. | ||
| And I was like, you gotta look like it's not a big deal. | ||
| Like, I was giving him my serial killer wisdom. | ||
| Like, you should be talking about this like it's nothing, you know? | ||
| Right. | ||
| But he was great, and you can learn about it. | ||
| Where can someone watch it? | ||
| You can watch a trailer now at memoryroommovie.com. | ||
| We just kind of put it together. | ||
| And there's also like, we went $13,000 over budget. | ||
| So if anyone wants to be an investor, go to memoryroommovie.com. | ||
| And when will it be available for people to watch? | ||
| Well, we're going to finish editing and then send it to all these film festivals and try to get in. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I made a movie with Joe List earlier this year, and I'm trying to start making more movies. | ||
| I've loved movies my whole life, and I've written screenplays with my partner, Dan McCabe, who's great, a great writer, and we just finally started making this and raising money and making it. | ||
| It's awesome. | ||
|
unidentified
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Cool. | |
| All right, man. | ||
| Beautiful. | ||
| But it was so nice talking to you. | ||
| Nice talking to you, too, man. | ||
| It was a lot of fun. | ||
| It was a good time. | ||
| I enjoyed it. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
|
unidentified
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All right. |
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