March 8, 2022 - The Joe Rogan Experience
03:08:46
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| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
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unidentified
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Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out! | |
| The Joe Rogan Experience. | ||
| Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day! | ||
| And we're up. | ||
| Oh, hi, Tom. | ||
| Oh, good to see you, Joe. | ||
| You are the man that brings the bags. | ||
| You bring the brown paper bags. | ||
| Joe, I was so happy to bring you bread that I was in Colorado doing shows Flew home, had my wife feed the starter. | ||
| I should have come right here. | ||
| Feed the starter. | ||
| But I wouldn't have been able to bring you bread, so I flew home. | ||
| This is so sick. | ||
| I flew home just for 24 hours so I could bake the bread and then get back on a plane and bring it to you. | ||
| But I feel like you haven't had it in so long. | ||
| You're the only one I'll eat bread from. | ||
| I know. | ||
| No, I'm lying. | ||
| I had a piece of bread this Saturday after the fights. | ||
| I did have a piece of bread with butter. | ||
| It's pretty damn good. | ||
| Well, I'm happy to do it. | ||
| I made one regular loaf. | ||
| I'm not sure which is which, but one regular loaf and one olive loaf, which has green and kalamata olives, lemon zest, and herbs de Provence. | ||
| And I hadn't made that in probably a year. | ||
| And the house was just filled with the smell of the bread. | ||
| It was so great. | ||
| And then flying here, the only thing in my carry-on was bread. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Because it baked yesterday. | ||
| Here, I'll let you open it with your hands. | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh my goodness. | |
| If Jamie could get a piece of it, he would probably. | ||
| Did TSA check that hard? | ||
| It smells so good, it filled my hotel room up. | ||
| You could bake fentanyl in there. | ||
| Let me see which one that is. | ||
| Does that have olives on it? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's an olive one. | ||
| Doesn't that smell beautiful? | ||
| It does. | ||
| It's so dense. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a pretty heavy bread. | ||
| I was reading about a woman who got caught at the border. | ||
| She's a pregnant lady. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And she had a rubber container filled with fentanyl stuffed up her cooch. | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh! | |
| What? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Which, you know, that stuff kills you if it's just a small amount. | ||
| Jeez. | ||
| She had enough to kill everyone she's ever met. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| What is fentanyl? | ||
| That's... | ||
| It's an opioid. | ||
| It's an opioid that is highly, highly potent. | ||
| It's like hundreds of times more potent than heroin, I believe. | ||
| The amount of fentanyl that kills you is so small. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| Pregnant drug runner nabs smuggling fentanyl in her vagina. | ||
| Like an eggplant? | ||
| Oh, it's like in a condom. | ||
| Yeah, she wrapped it in a condom. | ||
| Just say no to drugs on the... | ||
| How did they discover that? | ||
| They fingered her. | ||
| Well, that's a random search. | ||
| Yeah, that is an interesting question. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Like, how did you pick that person out of the line? | ||
| She voluntarily removed it. | ||
| Because she's waddling through security? | ||
| 19 years old and pregnant. | ||
| 19-year-old U.S. citizen was flagged for secondary inspection. | ||
| Poor girl. | ||
| Why is she faced with that? | ||
| Yeah, you know, I mean, she's fucking in a terrible situation. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| Just gingerly walking through security. | ||
| It says, oh, a canine dog alerted. | ||
| Dog's barking at her pussy. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Oh, it's terrible. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| Fentanyl. | ||
| Well, I felt pretty... | ||
| Pretty high risk coming with the bread. | ||
| It's literally my wheelie bag and these two big loaves of bread. | ||
| You just smell it. | ||
| Did people ask you? | ||
| No, they didn't open it. | ||
| They didn't open it. | ||
| No? | ||
| You look like a safe guy. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I should be getting fentanyl in my wheelie bag. | ||
| I thought that I was looking forward to it. | ||
| I wanted the story of them going through the bread and being like, it's sourdough. | ||
| Imagine if they cut it open, though. | ||
| Ooh. | ||
| Oh, you monsters. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| That's a pretty good smuggling technique. | ||
| Just sneak stuff in the bread. | ||
| Right. | ||
| When you're putting in the olives, also put in the whatever. | ||
|
unidentified
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Right. | |
| If you could have something that's got good thermal dynamics that you could put in the center of the dough. | ||
| Is that the right word? | ||
| Thermal dynamics? | ||
|
unidentified
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Sure. | |
| Something like withstand heat. | ||
| Right. | ||
| In the center of it. | ||
|
unidentified
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You have to bake it. | |
| Sometimes screw down metal container that's like insulated. | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| Shove it in there. | ||
| What is this? | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh my God. | |
| Look at these people smuggling booze and bread. | ||
| Oh, but that's like a loaf of bread. | ||
| Is that like at a stadium when they're going to see a game or something? | ||
| Oh, that's hilarious. | ||
| You know, when I worked as a... | ||
| As security guard, we used to always catch people smuggling booze into concerts. | ||
| Great Woods. | ||
| That was at Great Woods Center for the Performing Arts. | ||
| It's in Mansfield, Massachusetts. | ||
| And we would have garbage bales, like these big plastic garbage cans filled with booze at the end of the night. | ||
| No kidding. | ||
| Because so many people brought booze, and we'd have to search their bags, and we'd have to take the booze, and we'd just put it in their bucket. | ||
| And then we got to take it home. | ||
| They would just give us the booze. | ||
| There's that thing in O'Hare. | ||
| You've heard of that pot thing? | ||
| Yeah, you get to chuck the pot in there. | ||
| Yeah, you got to chuck your pot in there. | ||
| That's in Vegas, too. | ||
| Oh, yeah? | ||
| On Chicago's, it's inside the security line, though. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, you're already past security, and then the amnesty bin is there. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So it's like, if you got past it, now you're thinking... | ||
| Oh, it's up to you? | ||
| Your free will? | ||
| Well, it depends on where you're landing, right? | ||
| Because, first of all, nowhere where you land do they check you when you land. | ||
| Never. | ||
| You've got to be a real piece of shit for them to check you when you land. | ||
|
unidentified
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Pull that fucking guy off the plane! | |
| You know what I mean? | ||
| If they're checking you, you're already on the plane. | ||
| You made it through security. | ||
| You got on the plane. | ||
| You flew somewhere. | ||
| Yeah, and just completely act like a maniac in the sky, and then they flag you. | ||
| I had a guy yesterday. | ||
| I'm waiting to board last night to come, and a guy comes up, and he just pulls his mask down, just big beard, and he's just like... | ||
| How's it going? | ||
| Why aren't we boarding? | ||
| I'm like, you know, I was just being friendly. | ||
| I'm like, you know, the pilot's waiting for the whatever. | ||
| And it just becomes clear he's drunk. | ||
| He's just hammered. | ||
| Hammered. | ||
| And he starts talking about comedy. | ||
| And he's saying it's so loud. | ||
| You just low-key it. | ||
| Did he know who you were? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I'm just like, let's just get on the plane. | ||
| No, man. | ||
| Tell me. | ||
| Like, who's your favorite comedian? | ||
| All time. | ||
| Dude. | ||
| Jerry Lewis. | ||
| He wouldn't stop. | ||
| And then he does, and I'm being nice, and he's peppering me with questions, and at a point I was like, okay, I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude, I'm just tired, let's just... | ||
| Let's just get on. | ||
| And he's like, oh, my bad. | ||
| My bad. | ||
| That's okay. | ||
| I'm like, it's okay. | ||
| And I asked him something about himself. | ||
| I didn't want to think I'm just, like, ghosting him. | ||
| And he had this very, like, kind of little sad story that he's telling. | ||
| And then he's like, they go, okay, we're boarding group one. | ||
| He's like, let's go. | ||
| And I'm like, we're a team now. | ||
| I'm like, why are we a team? | ||
| And he goes, I'm not group one, but I do this all the time. | ||
| And he goes up and he gives the woman, the gate agent, his thing. | ||
| And she gives it back and then goes, John, John. | ||
| And he starts picking up speed to get into the gate. | ||
| And she goes, no, no, no, no, no, no. | ||
| You're group three. | ||
| You have to go back. | ||
| And he's like, ah. | ||
| And he goes back. | ||
|
unidentified
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He just totally knew this is how he operates. | |
| A lot of people do that. | ||
| They try to sneak in. | ||
| It's so gross. | ||
| I've seen that multiple times. | ||
| It's so gross. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a weird move. | ||
| It is a weird move. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And then just, you know, why are you special? | ||
| It's like kindergarten cutting. | ||
| Well, people panic when there's a line. | ||
| It's almost like they think they're not going to get let on. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's like, I got to get on that plane now. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They're not going to let me on. | ||
| Everyone's getting on. | ||
| Everyone's getting on. | ||
| You'll be fine. | ||
| Do you want to sit in your seat that much longer? | ||
| I mean, who cares? | ||
| Flying freaks people the fuck out, man. | ||
| How many people get drunk? | ||
| I mean, it's one of the weird places where you could drink at 8 in the morning. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| You go to the airport, they have booze there. | ||
| On the flight, they have booze. | ||
| Everybody's drinking. | ||
| Everybody's getting hammered. | ||
| Isn't it strange that they give you a drug? | ||
| They give you a drug. | ||
| It's scary, especially if you don't fly all the time. | ||
| Like a lot of these people, this is probably their one flight of the year, you know? | ||
| If that. | ||
| Yeah, and freaked out. | ||
| And they're getting on there and they're sweaty and nervous. | ||
| Give me something. | ||
| Right, but it's also, it's weird that there's a very specific drug that you're allowed to consume and they'll provide it for you. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They should be handing out edibles at the end of security. | ||
| You haven't been to the golf course at 7.30. | ||
| What? | ||
| You haven't been to the golf course at 7.30 in the morning. | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh yeah, but that's not because they're worried you're nervous. | |
| Well, there's just a bunch of drunks driving around in carts and with weapons and... | ||
| A golf club is kind of a weapon, but that's a weapon like your car's a weapon. | ||
| It's not a weapon on magnets. | ||
| You should see the videos. | ||
| There's some wild shit that happens on golf courses. | ||
| People get in fights with golf clubs? | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh, yeah. | |
| Oh, really? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| There's some crazy videos. | ||
| People, because they're talking shit, and I'm like, there's also a group in front of you. | ||
| If they're fucking with your play, and then all of a sudden someone mouths off. | ||
| Start hitting up on them. | ||
|
unidentified
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Oh, yeah. | |
| You got four, eight dudes fighting, basically. | ||
| Yeah, people get very tense about a guy in front of them that's going slow. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Is that the thing? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Or the guy behind them. | ||
| Going too fast. | ||
| Or if they're rushing. | ||
| Because it was a big hold up. | ||
| The group behind having a lot of fun. | ||
| The one guy's there all the time. | ||
| Just loud, drunk as shit. | ||
| Having a good time. | ||
| Eight beers deep. | ||
| But like, hey man, shut the F up. | ||
| Like, we're out here. | ||
| We're having a good time. | ||
| We're involved with you. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I don't know what you're supposed to do. | ||
| Now, when you have like a fancy place, like you go to a fancy place, right? | ||
|
unidentified
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Yeah. | |
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| They're supposed to be able to call a guy, and they're supposed to come out and be the mediator. | ||
| What if that guy's like some oil baron son? | ||
| 100%. | ||
| That kind of shit happens? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Good luck. | ||
| Annoying. | ||
| Good luck. | ||
| I did a show in Colorado, and there was some flight attendants in the front row, and they came up at the end when I was signing books, and they wanted to talk about... | ||
| Because I talk about... | ||
| Oh, I have a line in my act about... | ||
| What it is to be a good person now, the bar has been really lowered. | ||
| If you get on an airplane and don't punch a flight attendant straight in the face, you're a pretty good guy. | ||
| And they came up and wanted to talk about the stories and stuff about how insane this last year has been. | ||
| Sure, because you're trying to get people, first of all, just to sit down and buckle their seatbelt and not lean their seat back is hard. | ||
| Now you've got to get them to keep their fucking masks on. | ||
| The masks on and no alcohol for a long time. | ||
| She said her daughter worked for JetBlue and she got in a physical altercation on JetBlue, her daughter. | ||
| And yeah, she said, I think that they're going to stop the masks on the planes pretty soon just because of that, just because it's going to calm everybody down. | ||
| My favorite video was a lady with no mask screaming at a man to put a mask on. | ||
| She was just a person on the plane. | ||
| She wasn't even a lady who worked for the airline. | ||
| She was just screaming, and then she smacks him in the head. | ||
| Have you seen that video? | ||
| No. | ||
| She wound up getting arrested, but she was just, I don't know if she was on drugs or what. | ||
| You don't know what you're dealing with. | ||
| You don't know who's on what. | ||
| She goes, you're a real piece of shit. | ||
| And she smacks him in the head. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| And he's like an older guy. | ||
| And I guess she told him, put you... | ||
| Because one of the things that happened over the last year and a half is that people really enjoy telling you to put your mask on. | ||
| Because you kind of have to listen. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
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Right. | |
| You know when someone says, put a mask on, you're like... | ||
| You have to. | ||
|
unidentified
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It's a thing. | |
| If you're not wearing it, you can't say fuck you. | ||
| If you say fuck you, then you're on YouTube and then it's a real problem. | ||
| I mean, look, you got people to do it at all is pretty remarkable because people, you know, they don't know what they're doing. | ||
| The move I see at the gate all the time is older people You know, these poor people, they can't breathe without, like, anything on their face. | ||
| They're struggling. | ||
| And the number of times I see them pull the mask down and cough into the air and then put it back up. | ||
| They don't even cover with it. | ||
| Totally. | ||
|
unidentified
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I can't breathe. | |
| I'm telling you, I've seen that so many times. | ||
| I saw jujitsu classes where people had masks on. | ||
| Really? | ||
| It's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever seen in my life. | ||
| You're breathing heavy, you're on top of each other, you're sweating on each other, and you got a stupid surgical mask on which doesn't do a goddamn thing. | ||
| It's a struggle. | ||
| People lost their fucking minds. | ||
| They lost their fucking minds over the last two years. | ||
| Totally. | ||
| Think about how many people were already on anti-anxiety medication, already fucked before that. | ||
| I know. | ||
| And then you put this stressful situation on top of them. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a lot. | ||
| It's a heavy load. | ||
| It's a heavy load. | ||
| And people's ability to take a new form of stress into an already stressful life. | ||
| Very hard for a lot of folks. | ||
| Really hard. | ||
| And, you know... | ||
| I can't believe... | ||
| Like when I go to do shows and you see these people that are coming out and, you know, they've got families and they're out looking for laughs. | ||
| Like they're back wanting to do stuff again. | ||
| It's like... | ||
| I said to a couple shows, I was like, your kids won't say it, but I'll say it. | ||
| I'm proud of you. | ||
| I don't know what you did, but you did it. | ||
| You got through these two years of weirdness and keeping your family safe and that you're out just getting a drink and trying to have some laughs. | ||
| Good on you. | ||
| That's not a small thing that we did. | ||
| That was a big deal, especially in the beginning when you're like, are we... | ||
| Is everyone going to die from this? | ||
| Right, is everyone going to die? | ||
| Are we all going to... | ||
| March of 2020, remember those days? | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| You were like, this could be way worse than they're telling us. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| Remember those videos from China? | ||
| Yes! | ||
| When they were bolting people in their houses and spraying disinfectant through the streets, you remember those days? | ||
| Yes, and all of a sudden, New York was just quiet. | ||
| I mean, that was not a... | ||
| We got through... | ||
| Human beings get through shit, but when you look back, it's like, Whew! | ||
| Okay, that was really a thing. | ||
| It was really a thing. | ||
| So, you know, that you were able to muddle through it, great. | ||
| If it sent you off, I totally get that, too. | ||
| I totally get it, too. | ||
| I just don't know how, when someone gets sent off, how do you bring them back? | ||
| Like, how do you bring people back to, like, calm, normal after they went haywire? | ||
| Yeah, it just kind of, I don't know. | ||
| It depends the degree, right? | ||
| It just depends. | ||
| You just have to have that thing of just... | ||
| You just got to keep on getting on, you know? | ||
| I remember my grandparents who, like, went through all of the original troubles. | ||
| They just always had the mentality of, like, yeah, big deal. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Life is hard. | ||
| So, you want a tuna sandwich? | ||
| What's going on? | ||
| The people that went through the Depression. | ||
| The Depression and the Second World War. | ||
| You know, you just kind of muddle through. | ||
| It all comes down to just doing your little task and going forward and trying to stay... | ||
| Positive. | ||
| It's like in the doing, like the small of the little doing keeps you focused rather than the big overwhelming. | ||
| Well, being able to see, you know, big picture. | ||
| There's a funny meme that I saw online that Sam Tripoli posted on his Instagram. | ||
| Find that. | ||
| It shows the galaxy and the escape of the galaxy and then it points to an arrow and then you are here crying in the shower on the way to work. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Crying in the shower before work. | ||
| Right. | ||
|
unidentified
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That's it right there. | |
| Right. | ||
| You are here crying in the shower before work. | ||
| Just wake the fuck up. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| How great is that meme? | ||
| That's amazing. | ||
| I love the internet. | ||
| The fact that these memes exist, it's a totally new kind of comedy. | ||
| When it says, we are the universe experience itself having an existential crisis. | ||
| Carl Sagan. | ||
| That is great. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Perspective. | ||
| Perspective. | ||
| That's the biggest thing. | ||
| It's hard. | ||
| It is hard. | ||
| There's an old expression. | ||
| I've said it many times. | ||
| I'll say it again. | ||
| But the hardest thing that's ever happened to you is the hardest thing that's ever happened to you. | ||
| It doesn't matter if it's a tiny little thing. | ||
| Like when my daughter was four and she couldn't find her toy and she started freaking out. | ||
| I'm like, listen, we're going to find it. | ||
| It's not that big a deal. | ||
|
unidentified
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It's a big deal! | |
| I can't find Lammy! | ||
| But it was a big deal to a four-year-old, right? | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Because she hasn't really had, you know, now she's 11. If the same thing happened, she'd be like, I can't find my tour. | ||
| I'm like, well, let's look for it. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Like, you know, she's got a little resolved now. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| Experienced a little life. | ||
| Yeah, you got through it. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Some people are fucking... | ||
| They've taken no chances. | ||
| They've played it safe their entire life. | ||
| They don't understand it. | ||
| They've never done anything that's really dangerous. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So when a form of adversity like COVID came along, or this fucking war, this shit is scaring the fuck out of me. | ||
| So scary. | ||
| So scary. | ||
| And that's kind of the thing of going about your day. | ||
| It's like... | ||
| You check in and you look at it, and it's like, oh, it's too much. | ||
| I was reading an article today where they were talking about Putin's options. | ||
| He has almost no options. | ||
| Which is terrifying. | ||
| Terrifying, because he could do something crazy. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| If he decided to do something crazy, like if he decides to send one nuke into Ukraine and kills 100,000 people, 200,000 people, 300,000 people, what do we do? | ||
| Are we supposed to nuke him now? | ||
| That's the dangerous thing. | ||
| It's like, so you choke him out, and all the sanctions are taking effect, and okay, so you turn him back, and so, I mean, all right, so you defeat him. | ||
| Ultimately, what does that mean to a guy that has the largest nuclear arsenal on the planet? | ||
| How does he save face? | ||
| I don't think he does. | ||
| And pull out? | ||
| What does it say? | ||
| Or does he just take it, and everybody lives with him having taken it? | ||
| The world's nuclear-armed states possess a combined total of nearly 13,080 nuclear warheads. | ||
| More than 90% belong to Russia and the United States. | ||
| Yeah, but look, Russia has more. | ||
| Approximately 9,600 warheads, is that true? | ||
| Do they have more than us? | ||
| Russia has 6,257, we have 5,550. | ||
| Oh my god, I thought we had more. | ||
| No. | ||
| I thought that we had more nuclear power. | ||
| I thought, like, the power of our weapons was greater than the power of Russia's weapons. | ||
| I do know when I was looking something up about that... | ||
| We were talking about the suitcase bomb the other day. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I was digging through articles about that, trying to find out the accuracy. | ||
| There's a lot of claims being made over certain time periods of, like, we heard through intelligence that they now have 200... | ||
| They made 250 of these, so... | ||
| You have to have proof of that. | ||
| I don't think they're showing them, they're boxes of them, you know. | ||
| They're like saying they just had new ones. | ||
| The nuclear football thing, or the nuclear briefcase thing, was always a thing that got discussed. | ||
| I thought that our... | ||
| I guess it doesn't matter, right? | ||
| If one nuclear bomb goes to Russia and they launch all their shit at us, it kills the whole world multiple times over. | ||
| But I was under the impression, I believe I read something, that the power of the United States nuclear arsenal Was larger than the power of the Russian arsenal. | ||
| Maybe I confuse that to numbers of bombs. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It's all terrifying. | ||
| It's so scary. | ||
| And I just, I don't know, like, what his, like, what's his endgame? | ||
| Like, if there's 40 million people in Ukraine, like, how do you just take, like... | ||
| Well, how did he do it in the first place? | ||
| Like, imagine, like, us, like, the United States invading Rhode Island. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, what the fuck? | ||
| If they actually went out and did that. | ||
| And that's, it's a lot bigger than Rhode Island, right? | ||
| It's like, there's more people in Ukraine. | ||
| Like, how many people are in Ukraine? | ||
| 40 million? | ||
| Is it really that many? | ||
| Yeah, it's a lot of people. | ||
| So that's like California. | ||
| That's like if Washington, D.C. invaded California. | ||
| Like if the Pentagon invaded California. | ||
| It's so horrible. | ||
| And what's so bizarre is you're watching war on your phone. | ||
| Like you're seeing footage of this stuff. | ||
| High resolution footage because people filmed it off of their phones. | ||
| And you think about those kind of wars. | ||
| It's like we're used to those grainy black and white... | ||
| Images of those kind of a war. | ||
| And now you see people in like puffy jackets that your family wears and with their cell phones and that one horrible picture of the family of four just on the sidewalk, just dead. | ||
| And it was just... | ||
| It's horrible. | ||
| Yeah, I saw horrible video footage of an apartment building that had been blown up and there was these like old ladies wearing like old lady coats. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You know, like they look like your regular old Ukrainian old lady just hanging out. | ||
| A month ago? | ||
| Blown apart. | ||
| Like legs missing, blood everywhere. | ||
| Nightmare. | ||
| How do you just do that? | ||
| Just go in and just... | ||
| It's horrible. | ||
| So I don't know. | ||
| That's what I keep looking for. | ||
| Is those articles, I'm like, oh, so what's the endgame? | ||
| Like, what is the end of this? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Hey, it's terrifying. | ||
| So this thing about what Russia's offered Ukraine, I was listening to Sagar and Crystal from Breaking Points talking about it this morning. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| And apparently Russia's demands are that they recognize Crimea as being Russian, but I think they also want Ukraine to demilitarize itself, which is like hilariously crazy, because you just attacked us. | ||
| Imagine you saying, hey, I know we just attacked you, we want you to get rid of all your weapons, and we won't do it again. | ||
| Like what? | ||
| Right. | ||
| And also, if your president dies, we want to put a president in. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| He's a comedian. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The president of Ukraine played a president on television on a show a few years ago and then ran for president and won. | ||
| Genius. | ||
| Kevin Spacey should have tried that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| He's a tough guy, man. | ||
| He's just in the... | ||
| They made an attempt at his life. | ||
| Three attempts. | ||
| Three? | ||
| Yeah, apparently they've made three attempts at his life. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| But there was also like a Chechen hit team that came, like a whole squad of Chechens that they came into Ukraine to try to get him and try to... | ||
| And then they got... | ||
| See, it's so hard to say what's true and what's not true. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because you're hearing about things like, I heard that the nuclear power plant got bombed. | ||
| They attacked the nuclear power plant. | ||
| And then they said, actually it wasn't. | ||
| It was a building next to the nuclear power plant. | ||
| Right, caught on fire. | ||
| No, they attacked it. | ||
| Oh, they did? | ||
| Yeah, they attacked a building that was near the nuclear power plant. | ||
| So it wasn't the actual power plant. | ||
| It was a building near it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So it's like, you hear about all these things and it takes a day or two to find out what's true and what's not true. | ||
| At least we're finding something out. | ||
| Russia's locked down. | ||
| They don't even know what's going on. | ||
| He's shut down everything. | ||
| Is that what happened? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They have no access to any news. | ||
| They're saying that they're not even aware of what's happening, the Russian people. | ||
| I wonder how the system works there in terms of if Biden wanted to deploy nuclear weapons... | ||
| I'm sure there's a series of checks and balances that have to go into play before that happens. | ||
| It has to be approved by somebody. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| I wonder what the situation is in Russia. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| And even whatever the system that is, what mistakes could be made? | ||
| They have more nuclear weapons than us. | ||
| And they got one guy who's already shown that he's willing to just invade a country that just a few decades ago was a part of the Soviet Union. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It was all a part of the same union. | ||
| And now you're bombing them. | ||
| You're killing them. | ||
| It's wild. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| It's so scary. | ||
| It's the scariest time I could ever remember. | ||
| And I bet it must feel like to a lot of people what the Cuban Missile Crisis felt like. | ||
| Where it's like, Jesus, we're that close. | ||
| Yeah, like how far do we go? | ||
| When does this tip over? | ||
| Do you remember when you were a kid and we really thought we were going to go to war with Russia? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Do you remember those days? | ||
| I remember those days clearly. | ||
| Being in, I guess it was high school, and I was thinking, oh my god, we're going to go to war with Russia. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Rocky had to go against Drago. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| Rocky fought Drago. | ||
| When the US won in the Olympics in the hockey, that... | ||
| Oh, that's right. | ||
| I mean, the emotion of that was so crazy. | ||
| And it's hard to tell young people what that meant. | ||
| Like, oh, that's cool, you beat the Russians. | ||
| No. | ||
| It was at a fever pitch of just anxiety and almost war. | ||
| I mean, we were in a Cold War. | ||
| It was so big. | ||
| And now we're kind of like, what a dick. | ||
| What a dick. | ||
| We're coming out of COVID. It's all starting to feel hopeful. | ||
| And now, god damn. | ||
| What are you doing, man? | ||
| But you know, there was a lot going on there. | ||
| The idea was that Ukraine was trying to join NATO. And if they joined NATO, then NATO could park nuclear weapons at Russia. | ||
| At Russia's door. | ||
| From Ukraine. | ||
| Again, I'm not a foreign policy expert. | ||
| It's the shit I'm reading. | ||
| There's a lot of complicated things to it. | ||
| There's a video that we talked about a few podcasts ago, but it's really good. | ||
| It's explaining. | ||
| It's about 15 minutes, that video or so. | ||
| It's like a synopsis of what is going on with Russia and Ukraine, why Ukraine is so valuable. | ||
| One of the things is natural gas and oil. | ||
| It has a tremendous reserve of natural gas and oil, and that's one of the reasons why Russia invaded Crimea and took over Crimea. | ||
| That takes away some of the access to the waters where the oil and the natural gas are. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Could they have done it a different way? | ||
| Could they have taken it over or made a deal or done something? | ||
| Dude, I don't know. | ||
| Is there some other way? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| But the whole NATO thing is kind of crazy, too. | ||
| If NATO is invading and encroaching on Russia's space, if they're moving these countries into... | ||
| If they're making them join or having them join NATO, and then they actually would do that... | ||
| Park weapons next to Russia. | ||
| I had Dakota Meyer on the podcast, who's a veteran, who's got a famously insane story about some of his combat duty in war in Afghanistan. | ||
| Crazy shit. | ||
| But he was saying, imagine if another country like Russia or China parked nuclear weapons in Mexico. | ||
| And they're like, oh, yeah. | ||
| I mean, there's no justifying anything that Putin did. | ||
| What he's done is horrific and terrifying, and he's a legit maniac. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But you've got to wonder, like... | ||
| Yeah, there's something at play. | ||
| How many pieces are moving here? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And the humiliation, like the cultural humiliation that he was saying of Putin. | ||
| I mean, that's what Hitler was bred on after World War I. It was the humiliation. | ||
| We're going to regain this for ourselves. | ||
| That human emotion and a leader that drives them in these ways still exists. | ||
| Yeah, but I don't think the people are with Putin. | ||
| No, they're not. | ||
| That's why he's shutting everything down. | ||
| Yeah, I think it's a real bad move for him. | ||
| It seems so isolating, but that's what makes it even crazier, right? | ||
| So it's this one guy, so then he can do whatever he... | ||
| Like, there's no checks on him? | ||
| There's no... | ||
| You see that one when he's meeting with his people, and he's like on one end of this 50-foot table, and all his advisors sit down at the other end? | ||
| Really? | ||
| Did you see that picture? | ||
| No. | ||
| Yeah, Jamie, if you could find that picture of him talking to his advisors. | ||
| It's like he's isolated in very real ways. | ||
| It's terrifying. | ||
| He has to be. | ||
| I mean, they could not have wanted this. | ||
| If you play things out from where they first invade Ukraine, how does this end good? | ||
| Right. | ||
| What's the endgame? | ||
| They just give up? | ||
| They just give up and you occupy Ukraine? | ||
| They're going to be happy that you're there? | ||
| I mean, I've read how many official Russian soldiers have died. | ||
| It's in the hundreds. | ||
| But there's unofficial reports that it's far greater than that. | ||
| Oh my god, that's insane. | ||
| That's an insane photo. | ||
| That's him having his meeting with his people. | ||
| Why is he doing it like that? | ||
| They say that he got really wigged out by COVID. No. | ||
| He doesn't trust people. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No chance. | ||
| That's what they said, yeah. | ||
| So he stays that far away from people because of COVID? That's what he said. | ||
| Look at all the colorful food. | ||
| Looks delicious. | ||
| That's not a photoshopped idea. | ||
| Oh, someone filled the table up with food. | ||
| Someone filled the table up with a buffet. | ||
| That looks yummy. | ||
| That looks good. | ||
| Putin's long table explained why he puts some leaders including Germany Schultz at an extreme distance. | ||
| So it must be a COVID thing. | ||
| Click on that. | ||
| It's in Forbes. | ||
| Why he puts some... | ||
| Oh, you fuck. | ||
| $50 for a subscription. | ||
| Is that really what they're charging? | ||
| That's what it said. | ||
| $489.99. | ||
| Well, Forbes is a financial thing. | ||
| They have money. | ||
| This is why it's so scary. | ||
| It's like if Hitler had nukes, it's like, okay, so you can beat him in all these different ways. | ||
| Like you're saying the soldiers or this country turns out, or he gets just militarily defeated. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| But he has this thing at the back of it. | ||
| He has this horrible weapons. | ||
| He's got that. | ||
| So if you break him and take him all the way to the end, he still has that. | ||
| That's the most terrifying. | ||
| So it says the distance from Schultz, and he refused to take a Russian-administered COVID-19 PCR test. | ||
| That's why. | ||
| So they put him at the end of the table. | ||
| But the fact that he has a crazy table like that. | ||
| It says, Putin is living in a strict health bubble, and the Kremlin confirmed the extreme distance is to protect Putin. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Well, I guess when you poisoned a few folks, you get a little nervous about it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I mean, imagine what he's done to his detractors, and then imagine how nerve-wracking it must be to be him. | ||
| And worry about, like, retaliation. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, he poisons doorknobs and shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| When the people touch doorknobs and they get sick and die. | ||
| In different countries. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Did that in, like, was England, was it? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| God. | ||
| So, what's the process for him launching nuclear weapons? | ||
| That's what I want to know. | ||
| Does he have to clear it with his generals? | ||
| I hope he has to talk to someone. | ||
| Because he's the top dog, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Do they share that with the world? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Probably not. | ||
| Good point. | ||
| This is what I want to know. | ||
| What, like, the amount of power, nuclear weapons that Russia has and the amount of nuclear weapons that America has, can't they blow up the whole world, kill all life, like, many times over? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| So you hope that's the deterrent. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But you don't want to, like, Scarface at the end. | ||
| Just like, fuck it. | ||
| I'm gonna take everything out. | ||
| If I go, we all go. | ||
| Yeah, a giant long table filled with coke. | ||
| Say hello to my little friend. | ||
| Well, that's the thing. | ||
| Like, also, how old is the guy? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| He's, like, 69 years old. | ||
| And, uh, is he in great health? | ||
| I mean, I don't know. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I mean, we're all, you know, and then we've got China behind them, but we all kind of need each other for these economies to keep going. | ||
| I mean, I don't know. | ||
| It's all too scary and unknown. | ||
| This is why you go back to the thing of, like, my grandmother of, like, do you want a tuna sandwich? | ||
| Because it's too much. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's too much. | ||
| Well, this is too much, but it's also too much where you go, this could go really bad, and how does it go good? | ||
| Like, how does it go good? | ||
| The only way it goes good is if Putin backs out. | ||
| And if he backs out, he looks weak. | ||
| Yeah, right. | ||
| Or if they surrender and give him Ukraine, but then does he stop? | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| They're not going to do that. | ||
| I'm just talking crazy scenarios of how it could end. | ||
| I guess, yeah, if they surrendered and gave Ukraine. | ||
| Or he takes it over and he just starts to occupy it and it becomes Syria. | ||
| But this is what I was reading. | ||
| What I was reading was they were saying that they're grossly underestimating the amount of human beings they would have to have in Ukraine to take over. | ||
| And they said it was probably in the neighborhood of 500,000. | ||
| Military? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| They would need 500,000 people to take over and run Ukraine. | ||
| God. | ||
| Because if you take over, you have to take over everything. | ||
| You gotta take over everything. | ||
| You gotta take over the military, you gotta take over all the political seats, unless they just go, you know what? | ||
| You guys are right. | ||
| We're gonna be Russians now. | ||
| Right. | ||
| We gave up. | ||
| We're not Ukrainian anymore. | ||
| That's not gonna happen. | ||
| Because then it becomes Syria, right? | ||
| It becomes this prolonged war within the country and just totally destroys everything in it. | ||
| It's nuts, man. | ||
| So crazy. | ||
| So how many times over can we blow up? | ||
| I am trying to find that out. | ||
| The best answer I've found now is how destructive are today's nuclear weapons? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm so scared. | |
| Compared to the Hiroshima and Nagasaki ones, it says those were about 15 kilotons and 20 kilotons respectively. | ||
| Current estimations now of thermonuclear weapons yield about 100 kilotons of dynamite comparison. | ||
| That's just for one. | ||
| It says one kiloton nuclear weapon dropped on New York City could lead to roughly 583,000 fatalities. | ||
| So multiply that times... | ||
| 10,000? | ||
| I think you could just say everybody. | ||
| Yeah, basically. | ||
| It would kill everybody. | ||
| Because you said Russia has 6,000 of them and we have 5,000 something? | ||
| Yeah, they have just over 6,000. | ||
| We have just under 6,000 estimated. | ||
| Do we have more power than them? | ||
| More nuclear destructive capability? | ||
| Again, that would then go into like, you know, we've shown videos of like a couple mega bombs. | ||
| Like, maybe I could have one that could, you know, take over 15 or 20 of theirs. | ||
| I don't know how many of those one we have. | ||
| Might only have one or two. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Save it for a real good day or whatever. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| So you've just got to really hope that he doesn't want, that he loves Russia so much he doesn't want Russia to be obliterated. | ||
| The president of France. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What's his name? | ||
| Macron? | ||
| Is that how you say his name? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Macron? | ||
| Macron. | ||
| I was reading an article where he was saying that he met a very different Putin when he went to Moscow to talk to him about all this, and that Putin was just ranting and raving for hours and hours about history. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Which I don't like. | ||
| I don't like that either. | ||
| I don't like hearing that. | ||
| I don't like hearing that either. | ||
| Because if he's thinking that much about history, he might be thinking about leaving his mark. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Fuck. | ||
| Fuck him. | ||
| Yeah, fuck him for sure. | ||
| Fuck him. | ||
| I mean, no one's... | ||
| I don't think... | ||
| Even his own family's probably like, fuck him. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| How does that guy stay safe? | ||
| Yeah, how do you stay safe? | ||
| And is there stuff at work of like, how do we get this guy? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I guarantee that somehow you get this guy. | ||
| Because it's down to that, right? | ||
| We're down to one guy. | ||
| Right. | ||
| If someone took him out, let's imagine it happens inside of Russia. | ||
| Some Russian military guy decides to take him out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That seems like it's on the table. | ||
| I would imagine. | ||
| This is a crazy movie. | ||
| It is a crazy movie. | ||
| It's scaring me. | ||
| Yeah, I'm scared. | ||
| The only thing that's keeping me comfortable is spread. | ||
| Batman did a really good opening this weekend. | ||
| Maybe we send Batman. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Putin sends nearly 100% of Russian forces at border into Ukraine. | ||
| 100% of the forces. | ||
| That means everybody that was lined up at the border. | ||
| He sent them all. | ||
| Oh, at border. | ||
| He sent them all in. | ||
| When everyone was watching all the people amassing and they're like, I don't know if he's going to do anything. | ||
| It says, but the United States does not believe that Russia is preparing to move additional battalion tactical groups from elsewhere into the country to shore up its troops in Ukraine. | ||
| This is today, Jamie? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I do not like his face. | ||
| His face bothers me. | ||
| Does it? | ||
| Well, it's the face of a killer. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Should bother you. | ||
| That's the last face you see before a knife gets rammed in your throat. | ||
| Ah, jeez. | ||
| I mean, realistically, how many guys do you think that man has watched die by his hand? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| A lot. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's a difference, right, between him and a guy like Biden? | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Telling stories about Corn Pop. | ||
| Corn Pop was a bad dude. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| One of the things that I was saying- I love baseball. | ||
| It doesn't really apply to him because he's doing something terrible, but one of the things I was saying about the democratic process of electing a president, one thing that's weird is that- You're taking on the most important job in the world, and you're new. | ||
| You're new on the job. | ||
| You only get four years to get good at it, and then, like in the case of Trump, they vote you out. | ||
| So now, you just start to get an understanding of how things work, how to make the fucking engine move smoothly, and get rid of you. | ||
| Whereas a guy like him... | ||
| He's been running Russia for decades. | ||
| I know. | ||
| And when you do that, if there's anything else you do, if you're a CEO of a company, if you run your own business, after a decade or two, you really know what you're doing. | ||
| Yeah, you get an idea of how to do it. | ||
| It's kind of weird, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That the most important job, everyone who does it, is new at it. | ||
| Right? | ||
| It is really weird. | ||
| You've got to be great immediately. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But the other option's terrible. | ||
| The other option is dictator. | ||
| Then you get Putin. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| But the other thing with America is then you have what they refer to as the deep state. | ||
| Because really, you have the figurehead, who's Biden. | ||
| This is the best example we've ever had, because clearly he's declining. | ||
| And so the people around him, and the intelligence agencies, and the military, those are the people that are really calling the shots. | ||
| Yeah, that was like Bush also. | ||
| That was always the argument. | ||
| It was like, well, there's other people. | ||
| He's not really running the show. | ||
| Dick Cheney. | ||
| Right. | ||
| He's not really running the show. | ||
| Did you see that movie? | ||
| I did. | ||
| I didn't see it. | ||
| Still haven't seen it. | ||
| It's so good. | ||
| Is it? | ||
| His performance is so... | ||
| Christian Bale... | ||
| He's amazing. | ||
| Oh my... | ||
| Oh my God! | ||
| As I was watching it, I had just, not recently, but the last thing I saw him in was Ford vs. | ||
| Ferrari. | ||
| He was great in that, too. | ||
| He won the Oscar for it, I think, right? | ||
| He's all skinny with my buddy Matt. | ||
| I mean, just skinny. | ||
| And I remember talking to Matt, and he was talking about being on set with him. | ||
| He was so impressed. | ||
| And, I mean, he's been acting since he was a little kid, but he's so... | ||
| I could not believe I was watching him as Cheney and that this guy was Ford versus Ferrari. | ||
| It is crazy. | ||
| I mean, what he's able to do with his body, the transformations he puts himself through... | ||
| The eyes. | ||
| I mean, he changes inside. | ||
| That's the most insane thing. | ||
| It's not just like they put prosthetics on him or he wears a collared shirt. | ||
| There's something in his eyes, the way he talks, the way he moves. | ||
| I mean, he transforms. | ||
| And then what was the other one he did with Adam McKay with The Money, The Big Short? | ||
| Remember, he was the guy that figured out that the housing crisis was going to happen? | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Everything he does. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What was he when he was a kid? | ||
| It was Empire, not Empire. | ||
| When he was a kid with John Malkovich. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| A kid? | ||
| Spacing. | ||
| He was... | ||
| He was a child? | ||
| Empire of the Sun. | ||
| Empire of the Sun. | ||
| I don't remember that one. | ||
| Oh yeah, this is where he starred and he was great then. | ||
| How old was he? | ||
| He was like 12. Oh my god, that's him? | ||
| That's him. | ||
| With Steven Spielberg? | ||
| Wow! | ||
| He was so good, Joe. | ||
| That's Christian Bale as a 12-year-old? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| It looks like him. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Yes, that's him in a leading role as a 12-year-old. | ||
| And I'm telling you, he was amazing then. | ||
| This was not like... | ||
| Look, I put on a play in fifth grade where I played a Canadian Mountie. | ||
| It didn't come close to what this kid was doing in this movie. | ||
| Yeah, he does transform himself. | ||
| Like when he was the guy in American Psycho. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| 100% hook, line, sinker, believed it. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| And then The Machinist, which is one of the weirdest ones, the one when he lost all that weight. | ||
| Right. | ||
| That's when he played Dickie Ward. | ||
| Was it Mickey Ward's cousin? | ||
| Was it Dickie Eklund? | ||
| Is that his cousin? | ||
| Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Is that the guy's name that he played? | ||
| I don't remember the character's name, unfortunately, but I remember the movie for sure. | ||
| He's so good. | ||
| God. | ||
| I think it's Dickie Eklund. | ||
| Pull that up. | ||
| I want to say, I thought it was Mickey Ward's brother. | ||
| Not to sidetrack, but I played Colonel Doobetter in that play. | ||
| But he was great in that movie too, because in that... | ||
| Well, that's a different movie. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The fighter. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| The guy's... | ||
| Yeah, Dickie Eklund. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He's never swung and missed. | ||
| And he played this guy who, you know, we all in the boxing... | ||
| Like, look how... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, he's a crack addict in real life. | ||
| And so the guy was, like, you know, in and out of trouble. | ||
| And he played this brother of Mickey Ward, who's this famous boxer. | ||
| And he just played this kind of, like... | ||
| You know, eccentric, crazy, drug addict, troubled brother. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And you fucking totally bought it. | ||
| I mean, that's Batman. | ||
| How crazy is that? | ||
| That's great. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| That's Batman. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| And by the way, the best Batman. | ||
| He was the best Batman. | ||
| He was the best. | ||
| The voice was a little goofy. | ||
| People are loving the new one. | ||
| People love the new one. | ||
| People love spam. | ||
| They love everything. | ||
| People love all kinds of... | ||
|
unidentified
|
They love TikTok. | |
| Who is the new Batman? | ||
| Hayden Christensen? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is that his name? | |
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| Robert Pattinson. | ||
| Yeah, Pattinson. | ||
| The guy from Twilight. | ||
| He's the vampire. | ||
| Oh, right, right. | ||
| Girls loved him as a vampire. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| You know, this is a very controversial thing because he really wasn't into working out to be Batman. | ||
| So he's like the least convincing physical presence as Batman. | ||
| Really? | ||
| He wouldn't work out? | ||
| I'm sure he did a little something, but he didn't work out like Christian Bale worked out. | ||
| Christian Bale as Batman, he looked like an MMA fighter. | ||
| He was jacked. | ||
| Like that. | ||
| Robert Pattinson. | ||
| I mean, I guess he's in shape. | ||
| They probably photoshopped the shit out of that. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Whose body is that? | ||
| It looks good right there, though. | ||
| They put his head on. | ||
| I would say that looks reasonably athletic. | ||
| That's what I would say. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, that's a guy who's not fat. | ||
| I wonder what you would describe me with my shirt on if that's reasonably defined. | ||
| Dead man walking. | ||
| What? | ||
| He's vengeance defined, right? | ||
| Yeah, that's not vengeance defined, unfortunately. | ||
| Embodied. | ||
| But apparently it's a very dark and interesting movie. | ||
| And everyone that I know that has seen it loved it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I've heard good things. | ||
| 128 million opening weekend. | ||
| Oh, you're a fucking Hollywood guy. | ||
| You pay attention to that shit. | ||
| I saw the headline. | ||
| Look at you, reading Variety on the toilet. | ||
| How much money are they making? | ||
| As if, like, somehow or another involves you. | ||
| That's big. | ||
| That's big. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| How much did Pfizer earn this quarter? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Tell me that. | |
| I don't know that part. | ||
| But I do know that... | ||
| And Jackass forever did very well. | ||
| I'm sure it did. | ||
| I don't know how those guys are alive. | ||
| That's the biggest victory for me. | ||
| I just love that dumb, fun comedy went back to making some money after the pandemic. | ||
| That's good news for all of us. | ||
| Dude, you know what I watched yesterday? | ||
| I watched a series of Buster Keaton stunts. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| Here's the real deal. | ||
| I know I've seen these before, so I shouldn't have been so shocked, but I went down a rabbit hole, and I watched quite a few of them. | ||
| YouTubes? | ||
| Yeah, there's a gang of them. | ||
| One of them, he goes out this window. | ||
| No, he jumps from one rooftop to another roof, grabs onto the lip of the roof, and slips, and falls. | ||
| Watch this. | ||
| Now, this is not CGI. So he's standing there, he makes the leap, he catches that, falls through those things, and then catches that bar. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| And then goes under like that. | ||
| These are real, man. | ||
| And look at this. | ||
| That's amazing. | ||
| I mean... | ||
| Wow. | ||
| I don't... | ||
| How do you do that? | ||
| There's no stuntmen. | ||
| This is Buster Keaton. | ||
| But he did a bunch of these things. | ||
| Like, watch this. | ||
| Grabs the car. | ||
| Grabs the car, and he holds on to it, and he goes sideways. | ||
| But the thing is, man, this is all really happening. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, watch this. | ||
| He grabs the back of this trolley car... | ||
| No, that's not real. | ||
| That is not real. | ||
| How'd he do it, though? | ||
| That's definitely not real. | ||
| How'd he do it? | ||
| He was one of the first filmmakers. | ||
| But that's not real. | ||
| That defies physics, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Doesn't it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I mean, how did he do it? | |
| It's Johnny Knoxville. | ||
| Some of these were the beginnings of camera optical illusions. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, really? | |
| Some of them. | ||
| Not all of them, because he got fucked up doing some of these, too. | ||
| Oh, he had to get fucked up. | ||
| Because they probably had to figure out what you can get away with and what you can't get away with. | ||
| Didn't he... | ||
| Did you see the one when the whole house falls? | ||
| That's real. | ||
| This is real. | ||
| This is real. | ||
| Wow, look at that. | ||
| I mean, this is wild shit. | ||
| Wild shit that he was... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, look at that. | |
| His whole car falls apart. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Like that, mate. | ||
| Like this. | ||
| Yeah, so how did he do that one? | ||
| There's a small chance it just was on a, like he did some of it, but like that could have been like a screen plate, you know, like the way they even did cartoons back then. | ||
| I've seen a few behind the scenes of some of these, but I also don't want to discredit it at all. | ||
| I heard he got hurt doing this and still managed to make something happen even though it failed the way he planned it. | ||
| Dude, this makes my hand sweat just looking at it. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Watch him make this leap. | ||
| Boom, boom. | ||
| I mean, how does that not fuck you up? | ||
| Was that his body, though, falling down? | ||
| Well, it wasn't somebody else's body. | ||
| It could have been a dummy. | ||
| You think? | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| It sure looked like you would die if you did it, like if somebody really did it. | ||
| I mean, it makes me nervous. | ||
| But like, fucking crazy-ass Tom Cruise does his own stunts for Mission Impossible, broke his ankle, jumping from one roof to another. | ||
| Did you ever see that video? | ||
| No. | ||
| He clearly breaks his ankle. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| I mean, he's wired and everything, so he doesn't have to worry about dying, but he makes the leap, and his ankle catches funny, and you see his ankle get out. | ||
| What do you think the desire is to do your own stunts? | ||
| Tom does all his own stunts. | ||
| Tom, like he's my friend. | ||
| My friend Tom. | ||
| Tom does it. | ||
| Not Tom Papa. | ||
| Tom Cruise. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| The other Tom. | ||
| Tom C. The guy who doesn't bake bread. | ||
| He does all his own stunts. | ||
| He does motorcycle race stunts. | ||
| He does car racing stunts. | ||
| He does a lot of wild shit. | ||
| He learned how to race helicopters. | ||
| He learned how to fly helicopters to do a scene. | ||
| Wasn't that Mission Impossible as well? | ||
| There was a crazy scene and they were like, hey man, this is a fucked up scene. | ||
| He's like, I'm going to do it. | ||
| And they're like, what? | ||
| So he takes his helicopter, and he's going through this valley. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Like, sideways. | ||
| Jeez. | ||
| Yeah, and he's piloting the fucking helicopter. | ||
| Don't mess with TC. He's a wild dude. | ||
| He is a wild dude. | ||
| All things through L. Ron Hubbard, who strengthens him. | ||
| Well, there's truth to that, isn't there? | ||
| Well, yeah, if you believe it. | ||
| Like, this is real, too. | ||
| But this, like, he's strapped into the, you know, he's, like, tied on. | ||
| He's not just hanging on. | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| A lot of the shit that he did, like this, this is him actually doing this. | ||
| He's actually being suspended and he actually jumps out of this fucking building. | ||
| He does wild shit, man. | ||
| And he has the option to tag out, go to his trailer, eat some carrot sticks while the other guy does it. | ||
| Yeah, and by the way, stuntmen die. | ||
| They die. | ||
| They die all the time. | ||
| It happens all the time in films. | ||
| I have a very good friend of mine who got badly injured doing stunt work just a couple years ago, and he still fucked up. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, his head. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What happened? | |
| He was doing a stunt, and he did it once, and they liked it, and they asked him to do a second take, and he was very uncomfortable, and he did it and banged his head really hard. | ||
| My friend Tate. | ||
| You might have met Tate at the Comedy Store? | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| Yeah, Tate was on season three of The Ultimate Fighter. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| And he was, you know, big fucking strong athletic guy. | ||
| And stunts just go bad, man. | ||
| Of course! | ||
| They just go bad. | ||
| And he banged his head and he was fucked for a long time. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| Couldn't see bright light, had to be in dark rooms. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jeez. | |
| And all the depression that comes when people get those horrible head injuries like that. | ||
| So meanwhile, here's Tom Cruise. | ||
| Literally the biggest movie star in the world. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Risking his ass. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Doing these things. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| I slipped on the ice in Fargo, North Dakota last week. | ||
| Hit your head? | ||
| A little bit. | ||
| You alright? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Huh? | |
| But it was literally like a week after Saget. | ||
| Oh no. | ||
| I didn't even know I was falling. | ||
| It just happened so fast. | ||
| I was just walking to my show, but everything in Fargo right now is an ice block. | ||
| It's literally covered in ice. | ||
| So I'm just walking. | ||
| I wasn't even thinking about falling. | ||
| I was just thinking about getting into the building because it was so damn cold. | ||
| It's like minus 31 wind chill. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
| And I'm just walking. | ||
| And there was no part of me that was like, whoops, or whoa, or I might be falling. | ||
| I was just, I fell! | ||
| I'm down. | ||
| I'm on the sidewalk. | ||
| And there was a building next to me, and I just kind of grazed it a little bit with my head. | ||
| And I think I might have broke a rib, because I'm still in pain down here. | ||
| Broke a rib? | ||
| Or bruised it. | ||
| Yeah, something. | ||
| If you broke a rib, you'd probably know. | ||
| I can't sleep on it. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| Yeah, it's been a couple weeks. | ||
| Can you touch it? | ||
| I feel it. | ||
| It's not crazy pain. | ||
| They don't do much for those. | ||
| Unless it's really bad, then they put screws in place. | ||
| Yeah, no, this isn't that bad. | ||
| Maybe I bruised it. | ||
| There's a gentleman named Chance Rencounter. | ||
| We brought him up a couple of times because he fought in Bellator a couple weeks ago. | ||
| Or a week ago, I guess. | ||
| Not even a week. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| Whatever it was. | ||
| Recently. | ||
| And he got kicked and broke five of his ribs. | ||
| Yeah, like kicked really hard. | ||
| And he put a photo of the x-ray up, I think yesterday, of the screws and the plates that they put in place to put his ribs back together. | ||
| Yeah, there's the kick. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| And that kick broke five ribs? | ||
| Bro, look at it. | ||
| It's halfway into his body cavity. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Yeah, he fought this guy Koreshkoff who's a straight up killer. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| He hit him with a spinning back kick to the body. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| I saw some of your kicks. | ||
| You posted a kick like a month ago? | ||
| Same kick. | ||
| Holy cow. | ||
| Whack! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whack! | |
| You do not want a guy like that kicking you like that. | ||
| No, I can't even walk through the winter wonderland of Fargo without getting hurt. | ||
| So look at his ribs, all of these plates put in him now. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| That could puncture a lung. | ||
| Oh, 100%. | ||
| His lung was punctured. | ||
| It was? | ||
| Yeah, and it was soaked with blood. | ||
| His lung was filled with blood. | ||
| It was punctured. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| I mean, it was a brutal, brutal break. | ||
| And that ended the fight? | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| It was like the first few seconds of the fight, he threw that kick. | ||
| It was very quick, very early in the fight. | ||
| How was this weekend? | ||
| It was great. | ||
| Was it? | ||
| Yeah, it was great. | ||
| Yeah, great, great event. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Crazy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wild. | |
| I don't know the names or anything, but any surprises? | ||
| No, not necessarily. | ||
| Just really good fights. | ||
| It was Colby Covington versus Jorge Masvidal. | ||
| Have you been to a UFC lineup? | ||
| I haven't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bro. | |
| I really want to go. | ||
| What are you waiting on? | ||
| I'm waiting for the invite. | ||
| You know a guy. | ||
| You know a guy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do I got to give you three loaves? | |
| Just tell me when you want to go. | ||
| I would love to. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Are you going to be in Vegas in May? | ||
| No. | ||
| No, I don't think there's a May one. | ||
| There's a July one. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Is there a Vegas May date? | ||
| There may be a May one, but it probably is at the Apex Center. | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| Because there's an April one that's in Phoenix. | ||
| That is April... | ||
| No, excuse me. | ||
| That's in Florida. | ||
| That's April 9th. | ||
| And there's a May one that's in Phoenix. | ||
| Phoenix could be fun. | ||
| Yeah, Phoenix is fun. | ||
| I have a show in Vegas in May. | ||
| If you can make that happen, that'd be great. | ||
| I'll call the UFC. Say, listen, Tom Pomp wants to see some scraps. | ||
| Where should I go? | ||
| I would love to come, honestly. | ||
| If you want to go, the Phoenix one would be great. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| Yeah, because the Phoenix one, it'll be a fun time if you want to come, because I don't have any gigs scheduled that weekend either. | ||
| We're just going to go and have fun. | ||
| Oh man, I saw your steak that you ate after. | ||
| Oh yeah, we ate the John George Steakhouse in Aria. | ||
| I was like my dog just like salivating. | ||
| That would look beautiful. | ||
| One thing about Vegas, man, there's so much good food. | ||
| That place is great, but even better. | ||
| Sorry, John George Steakhouse. | ||
| But Bizarre Meats. | ||
| Where's that? | ||
| At the Sahara. | ||
| Oh yeah? | ||
| Bizarre Meats. | ||
| It is insanely good. | ||
| They cook them over fire, so they have these Argentine-style wheel steak grills where they lift and lower. | ||
| You walk in there, you smell the wood burning, the smell of the meat, and the smell of the burning wood. | ||
| Your caveman comes out. | ||
| It's so good. | ||
| And the gentleman that is a famous chef, Jose Andres, who is the head chef of that place. | ||
| So you walk into that place? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Jamie, show the area where they're cooking. | ||
| There's a video of it, I know. | ||
| So that's it. | ||
| Perfect. | ||
| So those right there, so they have the cuts of meat right there, these big thick cuts of steak. | ||
| And then they have these grills that are basically fires. | ||
| So they have just, it's just hardwood. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jeez. | |
| And then they put the steaks at the top. | ||
| See the very top area? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| They have them up there until the steaks reach like an internal temperature of, you know, like 110 degrees or something like that. | ||
| Then they put them directly over the fire to sear them on the outside, so they use like a reverse sear method. | ||
| It is... | ||
| It looks so good. | ||
| I always think I should go somewhere else when I'm in Vegas, but I never do. | ||
| It's not worth fucking around. | ||
| I can never get that outside char at home. | ||
| Oh, I can help you. | ||
| You can? | ||
| Yeah, that I'm good at. | ||
| Are you? | ||
| I can't bake bread at all, but I can cook the fuck out of some steak. | ||
| I'm very good at that. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Well, I have a beautiful freezer in my garage. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's right. | |
| You've got a nice setup. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I gave you that commercial freezer. | ||
| How much elk do you have left? | ||
| I have not that much steaks. | ||
| I have a good amount of ground elk still. | ||
| Do you have sausages, too? | ||
| Yeah, I'm getting low. | ||
| Well, I got more. | ||
| You know what you should do? | ||
| You should make lasagna with that ground elk. | ||
| Ah, that's a good idea. | ||
| Dare made lasagna? | ||
| Not with the elk. | ||
| I mean, I make a good lasagna. | ||
| Yeah, you should make it with elk. | ||
| Yeah, that would be good. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Elk lasagna. | ||
| Elk chili is really good, too. | ||
| Ooh, that's another good idea. | ||
| You know what I really like, which I think you told me, is for breakfast. | ||
| Oh yeah, with eggs? | ||
| Just crack some eggs over it. | ||
| Yes, fantastic. | ||
| Get some of this toast on the side. | ||
| In butter, so you get a lot of the fats from the butter, and I like a little garlic salt. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Garlic salt overall. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's so good. | ||
| Yeah, I know. | ||
| The freezer's great. | ||
| Something about the smells of cooking, too, they're so exciting. | ||
| When you cook food, you get the smell, all the aromas while it's cooking, and then afterwards you eat it. | ||
| It's like you get double pleasure. | ||
| Whenever I'm making sauce, and you start with onions in the oil, like a sofrito, some carrots and celery, and that onion smell will linger for a day or two. | ||
| The meal's done, it's all satisfied, whatever. | ||
| You come up the stairs the next morning, and you still have that lingering... | ||
| It's like the holidays. | ||
| It's like the whole house is just filled with it. | ||
| I love the smell of sautéed garlic. | ||
| It's one of my favorite smells. | ||
| Oh, it's the best. | ||
| Whenever I cook a sauce, the first thing that I do... | ||
| I usually just use bottled sauce, but... | ||
| Whenever I do it, the first thing I do before I pour it in the pan is I heat the pan up, and I mince up some garlic, I put some olive oil, let the olive oil get up to temperature, and then I drop the garlic in there, get it crackling, and then once it gets crackling, then I pour the sauce in over that. | ||
| So good. | ||
| It can never have enough garlic. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I interviewed Lydia Bastianich. | ||
| Who's that? | ||
| She's a famous chef, Italian chef, and I had her on my podcast and she was telling me that it wasn't until Italian Americans started cooking Italian food, like when they brought it over to the new country, garlic was cheaper. | ||
| So that's when garlic was really heavily introduced. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| It was always... | ||
| Because it was expensive in Italy? | ||
| Yeah, or it was more rare. | ||
| And she said, but, you know, all us lugs in Jersey were just throwing garlic on it like crazy. | ||
| And it became like a heavy thing. | ||
| It used to be, you know, like carrots and celery and onion. | ||
| And it was a lighter kind of a thing. | ||
| And we were just like, uh-uh, garlic. | ||
| Dude, I've seen like literally 40 or 50 hours of videos of Italian guys cooking steak over fire. | ||
| Because there's a special type of steak they cook in Florentine. | ||
| They call it Bistecca Florentine. | ||
| And they do the same kind of thing as that. | ||
| It's like you're cooking over live fire and the smells and the embers. | ||
| And I don't know what they're saying because they're all talking in Italian. | ||
| They're all getting into it. | ||
| I have the same thing watching guys making carbonara. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah, yes. | |
| With the guanciale and the egg and the cheese. | ||
| The bacon. | ||
| Yeah, Matteo Lane turned me on to these carbonara guys. | ||
| And the same thing, all in Italian. | ||
| Don't understand it, but you're just watching them. | ||
| It's better sometimes if you don't understand what they're saying. | ||
| Yeah, it is. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| Especially something as simple as cooking steak over fire. | ||
| And you can have the closed captions on and everything, and you can read what they're saying, but there's something about watching. | ||
| It's so primal, watching people cook meat over fire. | ||
| What's your char method? | ||
| How do you get the outside? | ||
| I have a gas grill, first of all. | ||
| Will I ever get char? | ||
| Well, the best way to do it if you have a gas grill, honestly, is you do it two ways. | ||
| You start it off slowly, like you put it low, and I would put it at like 250, 260. Somewhere around that line. | ||
| And have a meat thermometer. | ||
| Get it up to whatever the internal temperature you'd like to achieve is. | ||
| I like to get, like with elk, I like to keep it pretty rare on the inside and slowly get it to like 120. And then I like to use a cast iron frying pan to sear it. | ||
| So I get the cast iron frying pan very hot. | ||
| Very hot. | ||
| No. | ||
| No butter? | ||
| No, because butter has a low flashpoint. | ||
| It'll burn quick. | ||
| It'll burn up. | ||
| Yeah, so I use beef tallow. | ||
| Beef tallow, what's that? | ||
| Yeah, beef fat. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Yeah, beef tallow's better because you can get beef tallow very, very hot. | ||
| And that's how you do it with the Elks? | ||
| Or low flashpoint or smoke point. | ||
| I forget what it's called. | ||
| But basically what it is, it's like at a certain temperature, like some oils will become fucked up and they burn. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like butter burns pretty quickly. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Olive oil is not the best for that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Olive oil is great for a nice medium heat saute with garlic and stuff like that. | ||
| Yeah, totally. | ||
| But with beef tallow, you can get it hot as fuck. | ||
| And so that I scoop some of the beef tallow out, I dip it in the frying pan, and then I just sear it on the outside like me, depending on what the internal temperature is, a minute and a half, two minutes on each side, maximum. | ||
| Because you're just doing the outside at that point because you've achieved the inside already. | ||
| Yeah, just trying to get a nice crust. | ||
| What do they call the mallard reaction? | ||
| Is that what they call it? | ||
| There's a reaction of meat where the meat sort of gets like a caramelization. | ||
| I think it's called mallard. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| That's like when you get a steak and it's got a nice crust on the outside. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| And then the inside, it's very perfect. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Do you put the cast iron on the grill? | ||
| You can. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| I usually do it inside. | ||
| Do you then turn the heat up? | ||
| Or you do it inside? | ||
| Yeah, I usually do it inside. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because, yeah, if I was going to put the cast iron on the grill, I'd turn the heat up way, way high. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Is it called the mallard? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| The maillard. | ||
| M-A-I-L-L-A-R-D reaction. | ||
| So it's a chemical reaction with sugars and amino acids in the meat reacting create new flavorful compounds. | ||
| Flavorful! | ||
| But that's that beautiful brown crust on the outside. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So what I do is... | ||
| When I get the temperature of the meat up to about 90 degrees, generally speaking, I like to do elk one of two ways. | ||
| Either I use one of those Argentine-type grills and I cook it over fire, and when I do it slowly, I use a meter probe, or I do it on the Traeger, which is very easy because the temperature stays super consistent. | ||
| And you can read the temperature on your phone. | ||
| So I like that. | ||
| That's cool. | ||
| So I can read the temperature of the meat and the grill on my phone. | ||
| Just look in the app. | ||
| So I could be watching TV or whatever and just chilling. | ||
| So then, once it gets to about 90-ish, then what I do is I fire up the stove top in the house at high heat. | ||
| And I put a cast iron frying pan there. | ||
| Got it. | ||
| And I get that sucker real hot, get the fan cranking, and then I throw some tallow in there right when I'm about to put it on there. | ||
| Got it, got it. | ||
| And the beautiful thing about that is when you do that method, you don't have to make it rest very long either because you sort of slowly cooked it to that 120 degrees anyway. | ||
| Then you're searing on the outside and I'll let it rest five minutes plus. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| That's about it. | ||
| Oh, that sounds great. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nice. | |
| That sounds good. | ||
| So where do we go see the fights, then? | ||
| Maybe it should be Vegas. | ||
| Well, Vegas, you can go to July if you want to come to the July fights. | ||
| That could be cool. | ||
| Yeah, that'll be a big one. | ||
| July is July 2nd, and I have a gig July 1st, too, there. | ||
| July 2nd. | ||
| I think I'm in San Diego July 1st, so then I just buzz across. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Hop, skip, and a jump. | ||
| That's easy. | ||
| Show up July 2nd. | ||
| Yeah, you'll love it. | ||
| Oh, that'd be cool. | ||
| It'll be a big one, too. | ||
| Whatever that July one will be, the July 4th weekend is always huge for the UFC. Because July 4th is that Monday. | ||
| So July 2nd will be a cracking card. | ||
| They'll always have a championship event. | ||
| It might be the return of Conor McGregor. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yeah, I know they're talking about Conor coming back. | ||
| Really? | ||
| It all depended upon his injury. | ||
| Yeah, is he healed? | ||
| I'm not sure. | ||
| He says he's working out and walking around. | ||
| You can see him walking around, he looks fine, but whether or not he can actually spar, that's the big thing. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's like sparring is. | ||
| If he'd be, yeah. | ||
| You have to make sure that the bone's not going to break again. | ||
| He's got a titanium plate in there now. | ||
| Oh, jeez. | ||
| Just like that guy had on his ribs. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Connor's got that on his shin now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Aye! | |
| And screws in there. | ||
| So who knows what it feels like, whether or not he can fully get after it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That'd be a big payday? | ||
| No, he's going to do it for free. | ||
| He just loves it, right? | ||
| See, the thing is, I don't know if it can be Conor, because what they're talking about is Conor fighting for the title again, which is kind of hilarious. | ||
| But if that does happen, it will be the winner of Justin Gaethje versus Charles Oliveira. | ||
| Charles Oliveira is the current champion, and they're fighting in May. | ||
| And that is a big fight, and that's taking place in Arizona. | ||
| But the thing about that fight is, when that fight is, oh, I think I'm right about that. | ||
| Make sure I'm right about that. | ||
| I'm wrong a lot. | ||
| But when that fight takes place, you have to assume that they can be healed enough to fight in July. | ||
| Because that doesn't give you a lot of time. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's only two months. | ||
| Oh, yeah, yeah. | ||
| To be able to, right, come back. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| May 7th. | ||
| So that's the one that's in Phoenix. | ||
| That's a big one. | ||
| Oh, boy. | ||
| So it's like, for you to be able to fight, unless, like, let's say Charles Oliveira catches Justin Gaethje in a submission real quick, or Justin Gaethje catches Charles Oliveira with a big punch and knocks him out, if one of those guys wins quick, then you could conceivably say, I'm good to go for July, and they make it happen. | ||
| But that's a big if. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because these are two of the very best fighters in the world, and most likely, they're going to fuck each other up. | ||
| And they'll go the distance, and they'll be all messed up. | ||
| They're going to be messed up. | ||
| Most likely. | ||
| You never know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Like, Colby Covington just won this weekend. | ||
| He said he has no injuries. | ||
| He says he's good to go. | ||
| He says he'd like to fight again in July. | ||
| He said that. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| I think he said July. | ||
| But he wants to fight again fairly soon, so he's feeling good. | ||
| And that was a big, long, five-round fight against an elite fighter. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And there'll be no baseball, so that would be good. | ||
| What's going on with baseball? | ||
| They're having a lockout. | ||
| They shut down. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I saw you. | |
| You were getting pissed. | ||
| I was getting pissed. | ||
| Which is rare. | ||
| I'm like, Tom, Papa is hate-tweeting. | ||
| I know. | ||
| My one angry post was about baseball. | ||
| And the price of hot dogs. | ||
| I hate greed. | ||
| I hate greed. | ||
| Is that what it is? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Sons of... | ||
| You know, we've... | ||
| Yeah, I love baseball so much. | ||
| What is the... | ||
| What's the dispute? | ||
| It's between the owners and the players and there's different... | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't even know. | ||
| You don't know? | ||
| No. | ||
| I don't know the ins and outs. | ||
| But yeah, you're tweeting about it. | ||
| I just know get your shit together and open up baseball. | ||
| We stuck with you through this stupid ass pandemic through everything. | ||
| These families have... | ||
| Here it is. | ||
| It's all greedy. | ||
| Major matters such as the competitive balanced tax thresholds, the minimum salary, and the size of the new pre-arbitration bonus pool leaves the sides with a significant distance between their proposals. | ||
| Boy, good luck getting America behind competitive balance tax thresholds, minimum salary, and the size of new pre-arbitration bonus pool. | ||
| People are going to be like, what? | ||
| Where the fuck are the hot dogs? | ||
| That's exactly my reaction. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's just like, I want to meet my friends on opening day. | |
| Get your shit together. | ||
| So is it possible they're going to work this out, or is it over? | ||
| It seems like, well... | ||
| It seems like opening day is going to be shut, and will they work it out and save the season? | ||
| Perhaps. | ||
| But they're already knocking off some weeks, which is so dirty and gross. | ||
| It's just gross. | ||
| It is gross. | ||
| It's such a huge... | ||
| The money is so huge in these... | ||
| I mean... | ||
| Right, but if you're a player and you realize that the owners and the coaches are making way more than the players, which is understandable, but there's like some negotiation room and the owners aren't willing to negotiate and... | ||
| Minimum salary is low. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| No, I know. | ||
| I'm sure someone is more at harm than others. | ||
| I don't know who. | ||
| But get your shit together and realize that you've got a fan base and you've got these families that scrape together stuff to go and keep on this tradition. | ||
| It's just ugly and gross. | ||
| Yeah, if I was them, I'd be worried that people would wake up and realize that baseball is boring. | ||
| What? | ||
| Who said that? | ||
| Don't give us time to think about it. | ||
| Who said that? | ||
| It's relatively boring. | ||
| I love it so much. | ||
| Well, it's an American pastime. | ||
| It's an American pastime. | ||
| There's a lot tied to it. | ||
| Dude, people live for that shit. | ||
| My grandfather lived for the Yankees. | ||
| My grandfather too. | ||
| They were probably around the same age. | ||
| Yeah, probably. | ||
| In the same area. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I loved it. | ||
| I loved talking about it with him. | ||
| He was just, I was the best. | ||
| Yeah, I loved it when I was a kid until I started doing martial arts. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I found martial arts because of baseball. | ||
| That's how I found Taekwondo. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Went to a Sox game. | ||
| Went to see the Red Sox at Fenway Park. | ||
| And me and my friend Jimmy were on our way home. | ||
| And we had to wait for the T, you know, the local transportation system. | ||
| And it was a big-ass line. | ||
| So we walked past this martial arts school. | ||
| And I said, let's go see what's up. | ||
| And we walked in, and as I was walking up the stairs, I was hearing this crazy sound, like whomp! | ||
| And then a chain clanking, and I was like, what is going on up there? | ||
| And it was this guy, his name was John Lee, and he became a mentor to me later on. | ||
| I fought on the same team as him. | ||
| And he was the national champion at the time, and he was preparing for, I think it was the World Cup. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| You just wandered in. | ||
| I just wandered in. | ||
| I wandered in watching one of the best on earth in peak condition in the middle of training. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jeez. | |
| And I remember watching him kick the bag thinking, I want to be able And he was doing that thing that you saw me kick the back kick. | ||
| That's what he was doing. | ||
| And that's probably how I... No, not probably. | ||
| Definitely how I fell in love with that kick. | ||
| Which became my signature kick. | ||
| Because I wanted to do what he did. | ||
| I couldn't believe the amount of power he was generating. | ||
| It is impressive to watch. | ||
| Watching you do it is just like, whack! | ||
|
unidentified
|
It is. | |
| It's the sound. | ||
| The sound is the thing that gets you. | ||
| I'm so slow compared to what I was when I was like 19. Really? | ||
| Oh, yeah, man. | ||
| When I was 19, I was so fast at that. | ||
| Also, I weighed 155 pounds. | ||
| It was a lot smaller. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But you're still fast. | ||
| I mean, it's still fast. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Relatively. | |
| Relatively. | ||
| It's still a big, loud whack. | ||
| It's a lot of noise. | ||
| I'm just happy that I could still, at 54, that I could still do it. | ||
| Because I was worried that as I was getting older, like, there's going to come a time where I'm going to be physically limited. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| And I've managed to stave that off. | ||
| I've managed to hold that off. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, one injury in any part of your body that needs to participate in that, and it's over. | ||
| A lot of things have to be moving in coordination. | ||
| Knees and hips and back and turn and force and ankle. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| It's like when I fell on the ice. | ||
| That's exactly what happened. | ||
| Basically, you're an athlete. | ||
| But I found that gym because of a baseball game. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that's also what led me to stop taking baseball seriously. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I just like it. | ||
| It's just the pace is great. | ||
| I have so many traditions around it. | ||
| I meet up with my buddies from high school. | ||
| The pace is great. | ||
| So you like it slow? | ||
| I do like it slow. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Do you like soccer? | |
| And then there's action because it builds. | ||
| It builds. | ||
| It's that thing. | ||
| Do you like soccer? | ||
| I do, but I don't really watch it. | ||
| Like, when the World Cup comes around, I get into it and think, I should be watching this all the time! | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But I've never been, like, into the leagues and all that stuff. | ||
| There are certain dudes that when the World Cup comes around, they get really annoying. | ||
| I know. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| They know everything. | ||
| There's certain guys that are, like, a little too enthusiastic about letting you know that they like soccer. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| You know what I mean? | ||
| I totally know what you mean. | ||
| It's a little virtue signally. | ||
| It's a little I'm wearing two masks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know? | |
| You know the type of guy? | ||
| Yeah, this is my team. | ||
| This is what I do. | ||
| No, I know exactly what you mean. | ||
| It's the type of guy who pronounces the names of countries with a roll of the tongue, a little too exaggerated. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Guadalajara. | |
| Guadalajara. | ||
| Argentina. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know, they say names of cities. | |
| Yeah, and you're white. | ||
| They go too hard. | ||
| You're from Denver. | ||
| Settle the fuck down, buddy. | ||
| Those are the guys that get so excited about the World Cup. | ||
| Yeah, and they know a couple names. | ||
| Yeah, they're faking it. | ||
| All you need in sports talk to try and put a little bravado is just know a hair more than the person you're talking to. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| So if you could throw a couple names that that guy doesn't know, you're the man. | ||
| Phonies are gross. | ||
| Phonies are so gross. | ||
| Phonies are gross. | ||
| And I run into phonies like, there's only one sport where I can spot a phony. | ||
| I mean, I kind of smell the phony with World Cup, like... | ||
| I don't like how you're talking. | ||
| I smell phony. | ||
| I don't know what it is, but it ain't true. | ||
| But with MMA, I love talking to phonies. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because they'll bring up stuff. | ||
| That's the one sport that you go, ah, ah, ah, ah. | ||
| Don't try that shit with me. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I'm the wrong guy. | ||
| I got you. | ||
| Because I got it covered. | ||
| And so the phonies would try to break out data and facts. | ||
| I'm like, stop now. | ||
| You would need a decade of heavy research to be able to just have a conversation with me about this. | ||
| So shut the fuck up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| What is that thing? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| That phony thing is- What is that thing? | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Why can't you just admit that you don't know that much? | ||
| Some guys want to pretend they know everything. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it's a weird thing when you're talking about a sport. | ||
| Because sports involve so much. | ||
| Think of the World Cup. | ||
| Think about how many How many players there are. | ||
| So many teams and how many... | ||
| History. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| The whole thing. | ||
| It's the number one sport in the world. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| So if you're going to be a phony in that... | ||
| You know who's a legitimate soccer expert is Ian. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Ian Edwards? | ||
| Ian, yeah. | ||
| He lives it. | ||
| He lives it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He has a soccer podcast. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Ian's not remotely... | ||
| Ian's going to come here and we're going to go see one of the... | ||
| Because Austin has a professional soccer team. | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| So there's a, you know, Matthew McConaughey is one of the owners, and a friend of mine is one of the other owners, and we're going to go watch a game, and then we're going to do a podcast about it afterwards where I ruthlessly mock him. | ||
| But we've been talking about doing something like that for a while, watching a soccer game and then doing a podcast. | ||
| That's really great. | ||
| But again, Ian doesn't have, he has zero phony in his body. | ||
| No. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Nothing in there. | ||
| No. | ||
| He's the last person to pretend he knows something. | ||
| He'll pretend he doesn't know something. | ||
| Yeah, he's the guy who gets quiet when someone else is acting a fool about it. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Starts clocking it. | ||
| Did you see that fight that happened over the weekend? | ||
| That soccer match in, was it Mexico? | ||
| No. | ||
| Huge fight. | ||
| A brawl? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Brawl. | |
| Oh, no. | ||
| Like, huge. | ||
| They had to shut the whole thing down. | ||
| They had to evacuate people from the stadium. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, no. | |
| No, it was big. | ||
| At least 26 injured as fight breaks out amongst fans at Mexican soccer game. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| But that's on CNN. It might have never happened. | ||
| Wow, look at this. | ||
| They're throwing haymakers. | ||
| Oh, he's eye poking. | ||
| It spilled onto the field. | ||
| Look at that move. | ||
| The double eye poke. | ||
| Look at his belly sticking out. | ||
| Duck under and the eye poke. | ||
| Just extend the hands. | ||
| And the other guy doesn't know what the fuck he's doing either. | ||
| It never ceases to amaze me how people who don't know how to fight are so willing to fight. | ||
| Is there video of it? | ||
| Oh, here we go. | ||
| Because it's spilled out onto the field. | ||
| Three critically injured. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| In Mexico City. | ||
| Tell you what, bro. | ||
| Mexicans have a long history of combat sports. | ||
| Look at it, Joe. | ||
| The whole stadium is just flooded with people just... | ||
| This looks like people are just running to me. | ||
| Look at that guy kicking, punching. | ||
| What are they fighting over? | ||
| That guy kicked and then fell down himself, and then he fell down and he hit him. | ||
| Oh my goodness. | ||
| Look at that guy with the chair. | ||
| Oh my goodness. | ||
| They're on the field. | ||
| They're beating each other with chairs. | ||
| A lot of guys with no shirts on. | ||
| That guy looks so hammered with the chair. | ||
| He doesn't even know who to hit. | ||
| He just found the chair. | ||
| He kind of barely tapped that guy with the chair. | ||
| And he's like, no, this is too much. | ||
| He walked away. | ||
| He didn't keep swinging. | ||
| He tapped the guy with the chair. | ||
| He was like, what am I doing? | ||
| I'm going to kill somebody. | ||
| I got a job. | ||
| I got a family. | ||
| I found the chair. | ||
| 22 hurt. | ||
| Look at it. | ||
| I mean, it's insane. | ||
| Look at him with the chair. | ||
| Watch. | ||
| The guy with the chair. | ||
| He's got it up in the air. | ||
| I'm going to fucking hit something. | ||
| Let me get out of here. | ||
| Ah, jeez. | ||
| I've got to go find my car. | ||
| Go back to the beginning because when he was doing it, he did hit somebody. | ||
| Back up a little bit because he hit somebody with the chair. | ||
| There was one moment. | ||
| Here he goes. | ||
| Watch. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Watch. | |
| He moves forward. | ||
| I'm going to hit somebody. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| He kind of hit him in the butt. | ||
| Nothing serious. | ||
| He's got this, I'm threatening people with this chair! | ||
| Fuck it. | ||
| And he walks away. | ||
| Fuck it. | ||
| I gotta go home. | ||
| What am I doing? | ||
| Have you ever been, like, where a brawl takes place? | ||
| Where something happens and a brawl breaks out in the crowd? | ||
| I've been, yeah, there was like a, yeah. | ||
| There's a weird feeling in the air when those things happen. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Totally. | |
| Where you feel like kind of anything can happen. | ||
| When you don't know what's happening, but the energy shifts and everyone's looking in a direction, and you don't know what it is, but you feel it. | ||
| Well, it gets scary. | ||
| Oh, shit, that guy got laid out. | ||
| Oh, my God, that guy's bleeding all over the place. | ||
| No, it was nasty. | ||
| Oh, they must have stomped him. | ||
| No, like the... | ||
| Oh, this family running away. | ||
| That's horrible. | ||
| Horrible! | ||
| You just take your kids to see a game and this is what happens. | ||
| Look out. | ||
| Go back to those pictures, Jamie. | ||
| I mean, scroll down the next one. | ||
| That guy is fucked. | ||
| That one right there, I mean, that guy is probably dead. | ||
| Look at his arm. | ||
| His arm's going in three different directions. | ||
| His arm's fucked. | ||
| For sure, that guy's got a broken arm. | ||
| Yeah, and then the other guy, the blood that's coming out of his head. | ||
| God. | ||
| It was like right at the end of the game. | ||
| Many of these people were actually presumed dead. | ||
| None of them, you said? | ||
| It said many of the people were presumed dead, understandably, when you see some of the stuff. | ||
| And unconfirmed reports out of Mexico stoked even more, claiming several fatalities emerged from the brawl. | ||
| Awful. | ||
| Fuck, man. | ||
| No, come on! | ||
| Keep it together. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Soccer. | |
| Soccer. | ||
| God. | ||
| And you know, I would say, well, the good thing about baseball being boring is that you don't get this, but there was another problem with the Dodgers in this. | ||
| Look at the amount of people on the field. | ||
| The Dodgers and the Giants. | ||
| Someone always gets really messed up in the parking lot. | ||
| Yeah, sports. | ||
| Sports. | ||
| Well, sports are basically a proxy of war, right? | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's kind of like, it's like fake war. | ||
| Yeah, it's like a replacement. | ||
| Yeah, it's like a replacement of war. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, it's like when the Raiders are going to play the Dolphins. | ||
| It's basically, now it's Vegas, right? | ||
| It's basically Florida is going to war with Las Vegas. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| And we get it out of our system in an hour and a half. | ||
| You know, that's what it was invented for. | ||
| That's what football was actually invented for. | ||
| Oh, yeah? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There was an article I read about, I think we might have even talked about it on the podcast at one point in time, about how football was invented to give people something to do that was like a replacement for war. | ||
| Right. | ||
| When they were in between, when there was no war to fight. | ||
| Yeah, and in the beginning of it, a lot of it was like Native Americans playing. | ||
| Like some of the best early players were Native Americans. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Yeah, I was reading this whole thing about the history of football. | ||
| I wish I could remember more details, but again, I don't really follow football either, so I casually was glancing at this article and then I gave up on it. | ||
| Yeah, but when you see how people are so passionate and passionate by it, it's like, well, would Cleveland be marching on Pittsburgh if they didn't have the Browns and the Steelers? | ||
| Like, would all these young men be just... | ||
| I think you need to give people things like that to do. | ||
| I think legitimately, when you get an enormous mass of people like the United States is, the United States is 300 and whatever million people. | ||
| Huge. | ||
| They need some things that they can root on. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They root for. | ||
| They need some things that are very important and serious to them. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It takes you out of your everyday. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It takes all that aggression and puts it towards something. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It does. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It does. | ||
| Were you ever a hockey fan? | ||
| No. | ||
| I was a hockey fan for a while. | ||
| What happened? | ||
| They did you wrong? | ||
| Yeah, they just went into... | ||
| I was with the Rangers as a kid, and then they won the Cup, and it was this huge thing. | ||
| And then for the next decade, they were just so bad. | ||
| It was just like I... So you're a fair-weather fan. | ||
| Is that what you're trying to say? | ||
| It was pretty fair. | ||
| Yeah, I guess so. | ||
| LAUGHTER I didn't just show up when they won the cup, but I bailed at a certain point. | ||
| Well, that one day that I went to see the Red Sox game, that I got into Taekwondo, from that day on, all I really cared about was martial arts, combat sports. | ||
| That's really all I was interested in. | ||
| I was always interested in boxing. | ||
| I always was a big boxing fan. | ||
| But then I got really into martial arts and that became my obsession. | ||
| So I didn't watch any sports after that. | ||
| Right. | ||
| No, you were doing it. | ||
| You were participating. | ||
| But it's also like the stuff that I watched. | ||
| I'd only watch combat sports. | ||
| I'd watch boxing or kickboxing. | ||
| There was no MMA at the time. | ||
| And no YouTube, by the way. | ||
| Yeah, nothing. | ||
| But I would get VHS tapes. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You'd get VHS tapes back when VHS came out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I would record, like, say, if Marvin Hagler was fighting on HBO, I'd record it and watch it later, play it back. | ||
| God, this is good. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's amazing. | |
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Did you find the thing on the Origins of Football? | ||
| Oh. | ||
| I remember... | ||
| I think there's two different stories there. | ||
| There's definitely a story about the Native American roots in football, I know. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because there was some... | ||
| It's like how Jim Thorpe got involved. | ||
| Oh, right. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You ever see the picture of Jim Thorpe when he's running in the Olympics? | ||
| No. | ||
| And he had one shoe that was a shoe that he found, and it didn't fit him right, so he had to put, like, two socks on. | ||
| Yeah, and he won. | ||
| And he won? | ||
| He won the gold medal. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Like, fucked up shoes. | ||
| And they were, like, shoes. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, like dress shoes? | ||
| Yeah, they looked like shoes. | ||
| Like, that's all people had back then. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, the shoes they ran in? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, look at the image of them. | ||
| Like, look. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| It's like a wingtip. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, it looks like it fucking barely fits him. | ||
| Jim Thorpe, legendary Native American athlete, had his shoes stolen just before he was about to compete in the Olympics. | ||
| He found a mismatched pair of shoes in the trash can and went on to win a gold medal wearing them. | ||
| He was also the first Native American to win a gold medal for the United States. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Show a picture of his face. | ||
| Like, that is a hard man. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's a guy who's not going to get stopped by a fucking pair of shoes. | ||
| God. | ||
| You know? | ||
| He should have played Batman. | ||
| No. | ||
| He's dead. | ||
| Look at his shoe there. | ||
| Look at that vintage shoe. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| That's what they ran in. | ||
| It's just like a piece of leather. | ||
| It looks like there's some kind of traction on the bottom. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Some kind of thing on the bottom, I guess. | ||
| God. | ||
| You think about just the stuff that regular people could wear now compared to that. | ||
| Oh no. | ||
| God. | ||
| Everything. | ||
| Like everybody had like one pair of pants, one shirt, one sweater. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| And that was it. | ||
| Whenever they show like baseball games and you show it, they were like, wow, they really dressed back then. | ||
| They wore suits and ties to the baseball game. | ||
| That's all they had. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It wasn't casual clothes. | ||
| You weren't putting on board shorts and a t-shirt. | ||
| Well, it was also a big event. | ||
| To go to something like that was a big event. | ||
| There was no television. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Right. | ||
| There was a thing we watched the other day. | ||
| It was when Jack Johnson fought Jim Jeffries in Reno, Nevada. | ||
| And you looked out at the audience. | ||
| First of all, there was no ladies there. | ||
| It was almost all men. | ||
| And everyone was dressed in a suit with a hat on. | ||
| When we were watching this, we were saying, like, imagine if you were a hat maker back then. | ||
| You're like, this business is never going away. | ||
| Like, look. | ||
| Look at the audience. | ||
| Everyone has a hat on. | ||
| Well, it's probably fucking sunny as shit, right? | ||
| Oh, for sure. | ||
| Fourth of July on Reno? | ||
| For sure. | ||
| You know what changed the hat? | ||
| What? | ||
| You know what put it out of fashion? | ||
| No. | ||
| JFK. What? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| He, when he came on the scene, he didn't wear a hat, and he looked so great, and he had that head of hair. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| And that changed the fashion, and yeah, hats fell out of favor. | ||
| No kidding. | ||
| After Kennedy, yeah. | ||
| He was the guy? | ||
| Yep. | ||
| No shit. | ||
| They talk about it all the time. | ||
| I love hats. | ||
| I wear hats because I'm bald. | ||
| Oh, look at that, the beautiful hat. | ||
| I like that hat. | ||
| But look at the image. | ||
| I mean, that is- Yeah, that's amazing. | ||
| Everyone. | ||
| Every single person. | ||
| Everyone has a hat on. | ||
| And there was etiquette and there was rules. | ||
| You took your hat off when you saw a lady. | ||
| You took a hat off when you went inside somewhere. | ||
| They all have the same kind of hat, too. | ||
| Yeah, isn't that funny? | ||
| All a white hat, because they're all outside. | ||
| Yeah, I guess so. | ||
| And this was a famously hot day. | ||
| It looks it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Pretty crazy. | ||
| Pretty crazy. | ||
| I think this is the article about the football team here. | ||
| Native American team that revolutionized football. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There wasn't even a lot of forward passing back then. | ||
| I remember this, I think it's the Coach Carlisle Indian School, 1879. Right. | ||
| And that had to do with Pop Warner, too. | ||
| That's a big guy in the industry of football. | ||
| It's a whole long thing, but what does it have to do with the military? | ||
| There was a different story. | ||
| Yeah, so then that's the other part of where I thought you're maybe mixing two things up. | ||
| There's a history of just the strategy of football as an Army-Navy. | ||
| It was a big thing back when they would compete to do strategies and just have stuff to do in the off time. | ||
| Listen to this. | ||
| Pratt knew that nothing could stop the westward expansion of whites, and he knew the Native American way of life was coming to an end, fearing that Native Americans might actually die out. | ||
| Pratt opened up the Carlisle School to save them from extinction. | ||
| The idea was to teach Native American youth how to survive in this strange new world. | ||
| Wow Of course Platt wasn't interested in preserving their culture after convincing parents to send their children to Pennsylvania Pratt gave his students haircuts Instructed them in English and ordered them to dress as white people after all his model was kill the Indian save the man That's crazy I got really into Native American history about two years ago, two and a half years ago. | ||
| And I read a series of books, and one of them was Black Elk Speaks. | ||
| It was about this guy who had – he lit – what's so funny? | ||
|
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|
This is how he changed the game. | |
| Like part of the way there were rules in football because of this – Sorry, I read that out loud. | ||
| Oh, sorry. | ||
| During the game, one of the boys tucked the football into that elastic band and ran down the field with the ball under his jersey. | ||
| As he sprinted down the field, the Harvard team was completely lost, unsure of who had the ball, until it was too late. | ||
| Furious, the Ivy League teams were constantly changing the rules to stop Pop Warner's trick plays, which, oddly enough, essentially gave us the rules of modern-day football. | ||
| They were almost like cheating, but not really. | ||
| There's no fucking rules. | ||
| All right, change the rules. | ||
|
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|
Do it again. | |
| It's a little bit of little rascals. | ||
| That's a little bit like the war stuff. | ||
| A little shenanigan-y. | ||
| Right. | ||
| This Black Elk Speaks book, one of the things that this guy, I read two books about him, and it details he was one of the Native Americans that was alive when they roamed the plains and then lived through them being forced into reservations. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| And what happened with particularly the young men and children, how they were indoctrinated into white people's ways and taken from their families and cut their hair and tried to teach them how to behave like the white settlers. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's rough. | |
| If you think about this guy worrying that they were going to be brought to extinction, that came so close. | ||
| They... | ||
| What is that photo? | ||
| Oh, that's Black Elk Speaks. | ||
| That's the book. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's an autobiography, rather. | |
| We're always unsettling pictures from back then, photos, when you saw them all of a sudden in suits and ties. | ||
| It was just like, this is so unnatural for them. | ||
| Well, you know what killed the most of them was disease. | ||
| Right. | ||
| 90% of all Native Americans died from disease. | ||
| Really? | ||
| 90%. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Jeez. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The Europeans, when they came over, they had all these disgusting colds and bugs and fucking smallpox. | ||
| Smallpox, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It just... | |
| Oof. | ||
| Burn through the entire continent. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| Imagine a disease that kills 90% of the people and there's no cure. | ||
| Nothing. | ||
| There's nothing you can do. | ||
| Good lord. | ||
| Imagine if you visit a place and there's a million people, like the Mayans, like you would visit Chichen Itza, a million people, thriving metropolis. | ||
| You come back in 50 years, there's no one. | ||
| It's abandoned. | ||
| Jeez. | ||
| Like, imagine that. | ||
| So scary. | ||
| Like, you want to bring your children. | ||
| This is the place that I saw. | ||
| I'm telling you, they're all wearing gold. | ||
| It's the shit. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| You go way out of your way to get there. | ||
| You're going to love it. | ||
| No one's there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No one. | |
| Oh, it's terrifying. | ||
| They abandoned so many of those cities. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Have you ever seen those ruins? | ||
| I've never gotten to those. | ||
| I've seen one. | ||
| I went to Chichen Itza. | ||
| Was it cool? | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| And it's so complex. | ||
| Like when you're walking around it and you think about how much Like, design is involved, and the implementation, and where are they getting these rocks from, and how are they cutting them, and how are they... | ||
| Have you ever seen, like, Chichen Itza, the layout? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, not the whole thing. | ||
| Like, I've seen the pyramid things. | ||
| Oh my god, it's amazing. | ||
| And on top of that, there's, like, these... | ||
| They had ritual human sacrifice, so they had these tables where it's like a guy's body. | ||
| The table is almost like he's laid out looking like this, and the flat part of the body where his torso was, was stone, and that's where they would kill people. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| They would kill people and cut their fucking hearts out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah! | |
| On this thing in front of everybody. | ||
| And then they played soccer. | ||
| They played like a game. | ||
| It wasn't soccer, but it was some kind of crazy game. | ||
| And sometimes they would use a human head. | ||
| This is part of the speculation that they were kicking this fucking human head around. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Geez, I wonder why it didn't all work out. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| There was also- Give him an ad for soccer. | ||
| Well, there's so little about that culture. | ||
| I mean, the scholars know quite a bit in comparison to the regular people, but I mean, even their knowledge of this culture is fairly limited compared to what we know about, say, the Greeks or the Romans or something like that. | ||
| Do you think there are cultures that we just don't even know about, that are under the sea, maybe, or- Yeah, for sure. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, I think that that's probably what all this Amazon stuff, I mean, not Amazon, Atlanta stuff is all about. | ||
| There's probably, there was something that was very, very complex that was thousands of years ago that was wiped out by asteroids. | ||
| Right. | ||
| That's what Randall Carlson believes. | ||
| There's actually a theory about it. | ||
| It's called the Younger Dryas Impact Theory. | ||
| And it coincides with the very rapid end of the Ice Age. | ||
| The Ice Age ended very rapidly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it ended somewhere around 12,000-ish years ago. | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| It's all in that range. | ||
| And they think that—this guy Randall Carlson has studied this his whole life, and he was a guest pretty recently. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| He's been on multiple times, but he was on pretty recently. | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| There's all sorts of features in the Earth that you can show that indicate massive amounts of water that had gone through an area in a very short, like millions and millions and millions of gallons of water that's gone through an area in a very short period of time. | ||
| What would that mean? | ||
| That carved through the landscape of instantaneous melting of the polar ice caps, or rather the ice caps over North America. | ||
| North America, during the Ice Age, more than half of North America, all of Canada, was covered in a mile-high sheet of ice. | ||
| And that shit was all wiped out almost instantaneously. | ||
| By what? | ||
| Asteroid impacts. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And so this is how they can tell, because this is what's fueled this Younger Dryas impact theory. | ||
| They've always wondered, like, what caused the extinction of a giant percentage of all the megafauna, like there was a North American lion, this giant sloth, woolly mammoths. | ||
| They all died off very quickly in this area, and they think that that also has to do with this impact theory. | ||
| They found that when they do ice core samples or core samples of the Earth, when they dig down, they get to the area around 12,000 years, what they find is a large amount of what's called iridium. | ||
| Iridium is very rare on Earth but very common in space. | ||
| And it most likely indicates that that is the time period where the Earth was bombarded. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Pummeled. | ||
| And so they think that that has to do with a lot of the really complex structures that they find in ancient Egypt and Turkey and a lot of these areas that are inexplicably old for how complex they are. | ||
| And so they would always try to attribute them to more recent peoples. | ||
| But this would sort of wrap that up better. | ||
| People at one point in time had reached a very high level of sophistication and they were basically knocked back to the Stone Age for a thousand years or so. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| Civilization rebuilt itself. | ||
| Jeez. | ||
| So when they're talking about things, it's a very cool theory. | ||
| But it's very scary because that means that could happen to us. | ||
| Well, yeah, I know that. | ||
| You don't have to bring that up. | ||
| Yeah, no, that is terrifying. | ||
| All of a sudden you're back to sticks and fire. | ||
| That could happen. | ||
| You want some of this? | ||
| God. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| Coffee. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| It could happen. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Do you smoke cigars, Tom? | ||
| I do. | ||
| Do you want one? | ||
| I would love one, actually. | ||
| Let's get crazy. | ||
| That's a great idea. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Let's get crazy. | |
| That is an awesome idea. | ||
| I haven't had a cigar in quite some time. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Do they come from Cuba? | ||
| No. | ||
| Nicaragua? | ||
| Nicaragua. | ||
| They're actually JRE cigars. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Oh, no way. | ||
| Yeah, there's a company called Foundation Cigars. | ||
| They make awesome cigars. | ||
| Oh, beautiful. | ||
| They made a special cigar for us. | ||
| Oh, that's so nice of them. | ||
| Yeah, they're fucking good, too. | ||
| That's a beautiful thing. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| I don't know enough about cigars to comment on what... | ||
| Just make it up like the sport thing. | ||
| Just start saying some stuff. | ||
| All you have to do is sense that the guy you're talking to knows even less than you do. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Yeah, but that's what people do, right? | ||
| That is the move. | ||
| That's the World Cup guy move. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This fucks. | |
| Thank you. | ||
| You're welcome. | ||
| It is a weird thing, though, to want people to think that you're more knowledgeable than you are. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's one thing to think you know something but be wrong. | ||
| Like, oh, I thought that was right. | ||
| But another thing is like to pretend that you know things. | ||
| But you know what? | ||
| Sometimes when you just admit that you don't know stuff, people act like you're not shit. | ||
| Like if you were like, oh, so who is that guy that... | ||
| Is that guy a good defensive end? | ||
| You don't even know? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jesus. | |
| Fucking idiot. | ||
| Right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| There is that thing. | ||
| You've got to kind of protect yourself at times. | ||
| Bro, that would be me. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sometimes you've got to bullshit yourself. | |
| If I went to a football game with some people, I'd be like, why'd they stop? | ||
| How come they're stopping? | ||
| What's the whistle? | ||
| Why does that guy have a whistle? | ||
| How about that little man with the striped shirt? | ||
| What if he gets run over? | ||
| He's out there. | ||
| What's wrong with you? | ||
| They're like, oh, I thought you were cool. | ||
| I thought you were one of us. | ||
| I remember reading this story about NBA referees that would shave points. | ||
| They were corrupt. | ||
| Yeah, the one guy, right? | ||
| The guys went to jail. | ||
| Didn't they, Jamie? | ||
| You knew about all that stuff, right? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| The guys went to jail, didn't they? | ||
| Yes, he sure did. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I remember that guy. | ||
| Actually, just as you're saying, this was an NFL player today suspended for a year for betting on NFL games. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Dirty. | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| Why can't you bet on a game... | ||
| That you're in? | ||
| ...if you're not in it? | ||
| There's a lot you could do to manipulate the points when it's one play that can change the game. | ||
| Well, if you're not in it. | ||
| But if you're not playing... | ||
| No, yeah, no, that's not... | ||
| He's in the game. | ||
| Yeah, but your old roommate from college is playing. | ||
| Right, and he can tell you if someone's hurt. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I think you can bet on a game that you're not in. | ||
| But why can't you bet on a game that you're in if you're betting to win? | ||
| Like, we're going to fuck them up. | ||
| I'm so confident I'm going to bet money. | ||
| I don't know that that's what was happening. | ||
| That's Pete Rose, right? | ||
| No, Pete Rose bet the other way, though. | ||
| He did? | ||
| Yeah, Pete Rose apparently bet the other way. | ||
| He did. | ||
| I love this label. | ||
| Isn't that dope? | ||
| This band, rather. | ||
| I'll get you some of those. | ||
| I think he said he never did. | ||
| I thought he said he did. | ||
| I thought he didn't bet against us. | ||
| I thought that was his thing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, I thought so too. | |
| Hey, I didn't bet against us. | ||
| I thought so too. | ||
| And then I read an article. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Contrary to popular belief, Pete Rose bet against his team. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Which means... | |
| So Barry Bonds is never going to be in the Hall of Fame? | ||
| That might not be true. | ||
| Yeah, no, I'm actually looking at what happened with this player, too. | ||
| It says a league investigation uncovered no evidence indicating any inside information was used or that any game was compromised in any way. | ||
| There was no evidence suggesting any awareness by coaches, staff, teammates, or any other players of his betting activity. | ||
| It took place during a five-day period in late November while he was away from the team and away from the club's facility on the non-football illness list. | ||
| And he was betting for his team? | ||
| I honestly don't know that part now. | ||
| It doesn't say. | ||
| Find out if Pete Rose bet against his team, because if not, we're going to have to edit that out. | ||
| I don't want Pete Rose to be mad at me. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, I could be wrong. | ||
| I do remember reading that, but the thing is, I've read shit about me that's not true, so maybe writing things about him that's not true. | ||
| Yeah, even the thing we're about to look up might not be true. | ||
| Yeah, so he said in the book he never bet against the Reds. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I thought so. | ||
| But he was making bets, I believe, in a way that maybe he was managing the team so he could have done things to manipulate stuff. | ||
| Like by playing a player to win the game real hard tonight, fucking up tomorrow's game. | ||
| Playing a pitcher to get the strikes. | ||
| Oh, I see. | ||
| So he fucked the team by betting. | ||
| So he didn't make strategically wise decisions because he was trying to cover a point spread? | ||
| And that's probably why he got in trouble. | ||
| Whether or not that actually happened or was speculation, I think that's where I'm like, I wasn't even alive then. | ||
| Well, that's why betting on it, all these questions come up. | ||
| That's why you can't do it. | ||
| Would you just look up Pete Rose actually did bet against his team? | ||
| Look, I'm 100% looking. | ||
| Quotes from Pete Rose. | ||
| Quote from Dan Patrick's show. | ||
| I bet on my team every night. | ||
| I didn't bet on my team four nights a week. | ||
| I bet on my team to win every night because I loved my team. | ||
| I believed in my team. | ||
| I did everything in my power every night to win that game. | ||
| So the story that I read that said that he didn't bet on his team, that he bet against his team, that's horseshit. | ||
| Probably. | ||
| I don't think they believe him because they would say, of course you're saying that. | ||
| Right. | ||
| According to him. | ||
| The problem is, I don't know how many gambling junkies you've ever met. | ||
| Do you know any? | ||
| Not really. | ||
| I've known quite a few that have real problems, and those motherfuckers will come up with any reason at all to gamble. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| And they're sick. | ||
| It's like, do you remember when Kitty Dukakis was drinking aftershave or some shit? | ||
| She was so sick. | ||
| She was an alcoholic and she was so sick that she was drinking whatever she could find. | ||
| That's a thing with the gamblers. | ||
| It's a sickness. | ||
| How do you feel about gambling being now available to everybody all over the country? | ||
| I think people need lessons in how to manage their thought process. | ||
| And I think gambling is exciting. | ||
| When I was in Vegas a few months ago with Whitney Cummings, Rose did not bet on the Reds to win in the four games. | ||
| Here it is. | ||
| The four that Rose didn't bet on, the Reds, were all started by Bill Gullickson. | ||
| The problem comes when you realize this. | ||
| If he bet the Reds to win every night, when the four nights he didn't bet on the Reds would send up a gigantic red flag. | ||
| The gamblers would know that Rose wasn't betting on the Reds, so this may be the right time to bet against them. | ||
| You might say Rose was still trying to win those games, and yes, maybe he was, but if you take a closer look at the games in question, it becomes even more disturbing. | ||
| And they break down each of these games in question. | ||
| So he might have bet against his team. | ||
| Too many questions. | ||
| It's just too much, you know? | ||
| Or just even by not betting, maybe he's paying back a debt to somebody he owed money to. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I'll not bet here, but you can make your money. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You can make money here. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, that's the thing. | ||
| When guys get into hock with loan sharks and shit like that, it gets super sketchy. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| I knew a comic, and this was a comic in Boston, and he worked for the mob. | ||
| Because the mob ran one of the clubs in town. | ||
| When I say the mob, I mean, like, legitimate. | ||
| Like, you get paid in Coke or cash, up to you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| This kind of situation. | ||
| And this guy was a gambling addict, like a hardcore addict. | ||
| And he was placing bets for these mobsters, but they would make bad bets, stupid bets. | ||
| And... | ||
| One of the times they won, and it turned out he wasn't really placing the bat because he thought they were going to lose all the time, so he would just take their money. | ||
| No. | ||
| And so they were gambling a lot of money, and then he didn't have the money. | ||
| And then they found out that he wasn't really placing the bat. | ||
| Oh, what happened to him? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Is he gone? | ||
| He's alive. | ||
| He is? | ||
| He left Boston, though. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Yeah, How to Leave Boston. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| That's a movie. | ||
| He did a bunch of sketchy shit in Vegas too. | ||
| He was a gambling addict and he lived in Vegas and he got his next door neighbor to lend him some money to some little old lady and he fucked her over the money. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jeez. | |
| It was like a whole story written about him. | ||
| It's a sickness. | ||
| It's a sickness. | ||
| It is. | ||
| It was a story in a newspaper about him. | ||
| It's like being a heroin addict. | ||
| Yeah, so we've known that forever. | ||
| You had to travel to Vegas or you had to travel to Reno or Atlantic City. | ||
| And now you can just open up your phone and anyone can do it. | ||
| But they have Gambling Anonymous, Gamblers Anonymous, where you can learn how to not gamble. | ||
| Just like they have... | ||
| People get addicted to everything, man. | ||
| I know. | ||
| They get addicted to dieting. | ||
| That's one of the things that happens to people. | ||
| They get addicted to... | ||
| There was a guy who died recently, and he was addicted to working out. | ||
| More plates, more dates covered this guy. | ||
| This guy was... | ||
| He would sleep like four hours a day. | ||
| He worked out constantly. | ||
| He maintained like a 5% body fat year-round, and his fucking heart gave out. | ||
| And he was in his 20s. | ||
| He was in his 20s. | ||
| So this guy's like ripped. | ||
| Looks like he's in phenomenal... | ||
| Literally worked himself to death. | ||
| There was an article in the paper yesterday, I think. | ||
| Bigrexia? | ||
| Oh yeah, right. | ||
| Bigrexia. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| The same thing. | ||
| Young men are getting obsessed... | ||
| It's body dysmorphia. | ||
| Yeah, it's body dysmorphia. | ||
| It could be you never feel like you're big enough or you never feel like you're small enough. | ||
| It's basically the same kind of thing that's going on. | ||
| It's you have a distorted perception of what you look like and you think you look like shit and everybody looks at you like you're like a gorilla. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And he thinks he's too big. | ||
| He thinks he's, yeah. | ||
| I guess I have a little of that. | ||
| I picture myself as being really in shape. | ||
| I don't think that's the same. | ||
| That's probably healthier. | ||
| That kind of delusion, when you think you look good... | ||
| I'm sorry, what? | ||
| Delusion. | ||
| Delusion? | ||
| Delusion, it's not real. | ||
| When you think you look good, if you think you look good, but you look like shit, that's probably better. | ||
| Probably better for you, yeah. | ||
| Because you go through life like, I'm on cloud nine, baby. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah! | |
| I got it coming on, baby. | ||
| Let's get some pancakes for the table. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, here's one I read. | ||
| I read a fucking study that said, I'll send you this, Jamie, and tell me if this is real. | ||
| A study that said that women prefer dad bods over ripped bods. | ||
| It was in The Independent. | ||
| I believe that. | ||
| He said, I told you this a while ago. | ||
| I believe that. | ||
| You don't even have to go into the details. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Shit ain't real. | |
| That's true. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That shit ain't real. | |
| They love a nice dad bod. | ||
| No, women say that because they don't want their husbands to feel bad. | ||
| Survey confirms women prefer dad bods over six packs. | ||
| Horse. | ||
| It's such a lie. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Horse. | |
| Shit. | ||
| It is a lie. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Horse. | |
| Shit. | ||
| It is true, because my wife will be like, you look good. | ||
| And I'm like, come on, you look good. | ||
| No, see, it's an emphasis on the word good. | ||
| Listen to the difference. | ||
| Here's the difference. | ||
| Ready? | ||
| You look good. | ||
| Or, you look good. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
|
unidentified
|
If she doesn't say, you look good, you don't look good. | |
| She's just trying to, you don't look like a pile of shit. | ||
| You're my husband! | ||
| And then we watch a movie and then some guy will be on with his shirt off and she'll be like, oh. | ||
| You can hear her vagina moistening. | ||
| Hey, that's my wife you're talking about. | ||
| You hear this. | ||
| What's going on over there? | ||
| All of a sudden my glasses are steaming. | ||
| Did you turn the humidifier on? | ||
| Yeah, and you know, it's all different perspectives. | ||
| You see pictures, yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You see pictures when you're young and an athlete. | ||
| That's horseshit. | ||
| They don't prefer a dad bod. | ||
| That's not true. | ||
| It is not true. | ||
| It's not true. | ||
| No. | ||
| They might say it, but when they're alone with their friends, when they're alone with their friends, how'd you fill out the survey? | ||
| I fucking lied. | ||
| I don't want to hear it from George. | ||
| I don't want George to think he's gross. | ||
| He's not gross. | ||
| But he's not hot. | ||
| I mean, I close my eyes and I pretend my high school boyfriend's fucking me. | ||
| Oh, it's so sad. | ||
| It's not gross. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's so sad. | |
| He's a nice man. | ||
| He's a good husband. | ||
| He works hard. | ||
| He doesn't have time to work out. | ||
| He's so good with the kids. | ||
| He doesn't have time to work out. | ||
| He gets home from the office. | ||
| He's exhausted. | ||
| He's so good with the kids. | ||
| I'd rather him just hang out with us. | ||
| I don't want him going to the gym. | ||
| I don't mind if he has a dad bond. | ||
| What workout do I have to do to get rid of love handles? | ||
| Just gotta lose weight. | ||
| Stop eating all this delicious bread you gave me. | ||
| All right. | ||
| I'll keep them. | ||
| I have to say, that thing you were with Cameron when you were doing the kettlebell thing, that looked like my wrist would snap. | ||
| Well, you've got to build up to that. | ||
| That really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Under your legs, back up. | ||
| It was this end part. | ||
| Yeah, it's called the long... | ||
| Well, you get used to doing that. | ||
| The move is called the long count. | ||
| And sometimes I add a bodyweight squat, an overhead squat to that too, which is even harder. | ||
| So what that is, is it's like two kettlebells in between your legs, clean, press, and then when I'm feeling really frisky, all the way down, squat, and then back up, and then again. | ||
| Clean, press, squat. | ||
| Yeah, you were doing this at the end, too. | ||
| You were putting it back. | ||
| Yeah, that's what the thing about kettlebells is. | ||
| You're swinging them, and you get really accustomed to using them, and you know how to decelerate the bell so it doesn't bang against your forearms. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| But some guys wear a pad on the forearm so that the kettlebell can hit your... | ||
| I have those. | ||
| I don't use them generally, but I do have them. | ||
| It'll hit your forearm because it doesn't hurt your forearm. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But kettlebells, it's my favorite way to work out because I can work my whole body out. | ||
| What's great about that is if you do a thing, like say if you play tennis or something like that, that translates, that kind of strength, because you're making your whole body work as a unit instead of like curls or something like that. | ||
| Right, just isolating that one muscle and doing that one task. | ||
| Yeah, that's the only kind of workouts I do mostly. | ||
| I mean, I do some stuff like I do dips, which is kind of isolating, and I do chin-ups, which is... | ||
| But most of the stuff I do is like these compound movements where there's a lot of things going on all at once. | ||
| So my body knows how to coordinate weight. | ||
| I'm doing push-ups now. | ||
| Good for you. | ||
| How many did you do in a row? | ||
| 25. 100 in total. | ||
| That's great. | ||
| So you do like four sets of 25? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nice. | |
| That's a good amount. | ||
| Yeah, because... | ||
| What is this? | ||
| I think this is the article that this came from, right? | ||
| Yeah, that's the article. | ||
| The majority of people prefer Dadbobs to more toned... | ||
| Read the second paragraph, which describes how they got the data. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| As reported by The Guardian, 75% of single people who took part in the survey conducted by Dating.com were said to prefer so-called dad bod type, a label that has been thrown at men who aren't considered to have the athletic beach body that we've all seen in movies. | ||
| Of those who took the survey and believe themselves to have a dad bod, 45% of them admitted to putting hashtag dad bod in their bios as a way of showing off their proud physique. | ||
| So how many people that took the survey... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, dad bods are preferable because I fucking have one. | |
| Half? | ||
| More than half? | ||
| Right. | ||
| That shouldn't be for men. | ||
| That should not be for men. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| There's no way that should be. | ||
| People say most people prefer a dad bod. | ||
| That's deceptive. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because you need to ask ladies when no one's around. | ||
| That being said, 70% of them answered said they've been working out more in the past few months to get in better shape. | ||
| Well, that's the thing about DadBod. | ||
| DadBod gives you... | ||
| It's not saying I'm gross and fat. | ||
| It's saying, I'm athletic, but I've got... | ||
| Like, that is the mentality, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| I got a little fat. | ||
| Yeah, I was an athlete. | ||
| I played football 30 years ago. | ||
| I got a little chub on me. | ||
| You can't have men ask that. | ||
| You can't ask men that question. | ||
| Here's another one that I found. | ||
| This one might be even more preposterous because I read this one and I'm like, okay, they're grooming people. | ||
| It was guys saying that they get together with their buddies and they cuddle and sometimes kiss straight men, bromances, kiss, cuddle, and stand around naked together. | ||
| No, they don't. | ||
| Those are gay guys. | ||
| Nothing wrong with being gay. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But straight men who kiss, cuddle, and stand around naked together are gay. | ||
| Those are gay guys. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Most likely. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| A strong percentage. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I mean, maybe some of them are like really open-minded and like, I'll kiss you. | ||
| There's like three of those. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I'll kiss you right in the lips after this podcast is over. | ||
| Pandemic's over! | ||
| Yeah, with coffee and cigar breath. | ||
| I'll give you one right in the smacker. | ||
| But if you want me to go tongue to tongue with you... | ||
| Yeah, and you're in another world. | ||
| You're in another thing. | ||
| If you want to stand around naked together, like, why are you standing around naked? | ||
| Period. | ||
| Put some clothes on, you fucking savage. | ||
| Alright, so what about... | ||
| Put on some pants. | ||
| What are you doing, man? | ||
| What's this about? | ||
| So why are all of a sudden these guys having body issues? | ||
| Like, women have been talking about this forever, right? | ||
| In magazines and stuff, and they've been... | ||
| Because guys feel left out in the grind of fucking being objectified. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Hey, we feel bad too. | ||
| Hey, we're fucked over as well! | ||
| I had a fucking argument with a guy about this once, because men do try to find ways where they're victims to, and it's so dumb. | ||
| And this fucking dummy literally said, we were talking about the plight that men have, and he goes, you know, statistically speaking, men actually get raped more than women. | ||
| I go, yeah, buy other men, you fucking idiot. | ||
| That's the dumbest thing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All that means is we're so gross, we fuck each other. | |
| That's all that means. | ||
| The idea that somehow, oh, we're victims too. | ||
| There's fucking packs of cheerleaders out there raping football players. | ||
| That's not what's going on, man. | ||
| You just declared that men are even worse than we thought. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes! | |
| I had a bit about it back in the day. | ||
| But men do that. | ||
| Some weak men who don't want to admit that it's fucking hard to be a woman, man. | ||
| Look, it's so hard. | ||
| Women make a baby in their body. | ||
| It takes forever. | ||
| And then their body gains all this weight. | ||
| Their vagina gets destroyed as this baby comes out. | ||
| They have all this healing they have to do afterwards. | ||
| And in many circles, they're expected to work full time. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Imagine! | ||
| Imagine! | ||
| You're raising a child, you gotta handle the kid, and then you gotta leave your kid with someone you fucking barely know so you can work and you gotta compete with men and try to be this like... | ||
| And still menstruating once a month. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Forget it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Forget it. | ||
| And you know, just imagine the resources required to grow a human in your body. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And imagine there's anything remotely comparable that a man has to do outside of war. | ||
| Just imagine all of the solutions we would have if men were the ones doing it. | ||
| There'd be tanks, there'd be all of these different things. | ||
| How many abortions would there be? | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| If guys got pregnant, they would be everywhere. | ||
| They'd be like Jiffy Lubes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They would be everywhere. | |
| 100%. | ||
| Yeah, 100%. | ||
| This discussion would be, this whole national debate. | ||
| And all the moral dilemma about whether or not it's okay to have an abortion would go out the fucking window. | ||
| Out the window. | ||
| Out the window. | ||
| No, of course. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Guys are the worst. | ||
| Well, you know, it's a testosterone thing. | ||
| It's also like we have the genetics in us that are the same genetics as people that lived during savage times thousands of years ago. | ||
| We're the exact same thing. | ||
| We're the exact same version of human beings pretty much. | ||
| If you took a person from 10,000 years ago and you put them in a movie theater and dressed them up with a baseball hat on, they'd They blend right in. | ||
| They'd probably be smaller because they didn't have any food back then. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But they would be real similar. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| Real fucking similar. | ||
| No, we haven't really changed that much. | ||
| Very little. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| We just have more access to good food, nutrition, but genetics, they say, take like 10,000 years to establish like really great changes in the genome. | ||
| Jeez. | ||
| In terms of like, obviously I don't know what I'm talking about. | ||
| I'm just saying words. | ||
| I'm believing every word of it. | ||
| I'm in. | ||
| No, but it does make sense. | ||
| I don't think we're much different. | ||
| No, we're not. | ||
| I don't think we're much different than people that lived in a time where everyone was killing everybody with a hatchet. | ||
| I know. | ||
| That's what always blows me away. | ||
| I always think they had to have been so different. | ||
| When I just read stories about that, or when you're talking about Black Elk and all this kind of stuff, no, they were you and I. Dealing with it. | ||
| It was the same person, the same thing, but dealing with that set of circumstances. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's bonkers. | ||
| It's crazy because that's one of the reasons why human beings have so much anxiety and that's one of the reasons why we have so much violence inside of us. | ||
| It's not because society demands you be violent. | ||
| It's a lot of it is like we just have this leftover code That's in our bodies that is very confused as to why it's in a cubicle. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Why am I in traffic all day? | ||
| Why am I in a cubicle? | ||
| My body has requirements that it's not meeting, living like this. | ||
| Yeah, it's totally different. | ||
| And then we're going to go into the metaverse and we're going to do even less. | ||
| How long after Zuckerberg launches the metaverse do you join up? | ||
| A couple, like a week. | ||
| I bet it's gonna be so fun. | ||
| I'll tell you what. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's the problem. | |
| No dad bods in the metaverse. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| No dad bods. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Everyone's gonna be hot. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Everyone's gonna be hot. | |
| The only time a dad bod's gonna be hot is when food becomes, like, scarce. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, remember the Rubenesque women back in the day? | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They were hot. | |
| All the paintings of, yeah, exactly. | ||
| Big ol' fat ladies were hot. | ||
| It showed luxury. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It showed wealth. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You could eat all you wanted. | ||
| Just sit around eating grapes. | ||
| You're a woman of luxury. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| The metaverse, it sounds exciting and terrifying at the same time. | ||
| Dude, it's going to be so fun. | ||
| That's what the problem is going to be. | ||
| You and I, we're going to link up on the metaverse. | ||
| You're going to be still trapped in L.A. like a fool. | ||
| L.A.'s nice again. | ||
| I'll be out here in Freedom Town. | ||
| Oh, L.A.'s nice. | ||
| People don't get arrested for anything. | ||
| It's great. | ||
| It's awesome. | ||
| They just break into your house and loot you. | ||
| Well, there's a lot of crime, sure. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, yeah. | |
| What a great thing to have around your whole family. | ||
| Crime. | ||
| Well, there's crime everywhere. | ||
| What is this, Jamie? | ||
| What are you showing me here? | ||
| This is the new, I would call it a competitor to what the metaverse is. | ||
| A Viverse. | ||
| So this is augmented reality. | ||
| Right, so this is what the Vive is showing as what they're calling the Viveverse. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Viveverse. | ||
| Based around HTC Vive. | ||
| Okay, I want you to look at that. | ||
| Back that up again. | ||
| Back that up a little bit. | ||
| Look at the athlete on the left-hand side. | ||
| See that? | ||
| That's what men want to look like. | ||
| That's what women want. | ||
| That's why she's not looking at her body, notice? | ||
| She's looking at hot men. | ||
| She's running, thinking about getting some gladiator dick. | ||
| That's what she's thinking. | ||
| She's thinking, I'm going to get a nice toned butt and I'm going to get that big fucking savage look. | ||
| Oh, look how she shrunk down in the metaverse. | ||
| Go back and look at that again. | ||
| Before she did that, look at what she really looks like. | ||
| And then watch this. | ||
| Oh, she lost 80 pounds. | ||
| I liked her before. | ||
| Yeah, she looks like a little kid now. | ||
| Yeah, I liked her before. | ||
| She looked great. | ||
| Go back to what she looked like. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| She looks like a nice-looking gal. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But you can do anything. | ||
| She's womanly. | ||
| Why, you don't even have to be a person. | ||
| Yeah, but she'd lost too much weight. | ||
| Like, if that was your wife, you'd be like, honey, have a sandwich. | ||
| Yeah, come on now. | ||
| Come on, honey, what are you doing? | ||
| I don't like you this skinny. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I don't know how... | ||
| Well... | ||
| Look, they're all dancing. | ||
| You can go to a club. | ||
| You can do anything. | ||
| You can fly. | ||
| Yeah, you're having fun. | ||
| You can do all the stuff. | ||
| You can buy... | ||
| You're a cat! | ||
| Grandma sent an invitation. | ||
| You're a kitty cat! | ||
| I want to be a dog. | ||
| I'd rather be a dog. | ||
| I'd rather be a dog. | ||
| The pure joy that dogs have... | ||
| I'm going to send you this, Jamie. | ||
| This is like the funniest thing that I saw, or the happiest thing that I saw today. | ||
| It made me... | ||
| This is why... | ||
| I mean, there's a lot of reasons why I love dogs. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| This is one of them. | ||
| I'm going to send you this, Jimmy. | ||
| I had a good post of these three dogs taking a picture. | ||
| I reposted from somebody. | ||
| Did you see that... | ||
| Did you see that... | ||
| I don't know if it... | ||
| It wasn't an elk. | ||
| It looked like an elk. | ||
| It looked like a smaller... | ||
| What is it? | ||
| Nature is Metal. | ||
| Running down the mountain. | ||
| Oh, that was a chamois. | ||
| Holy cow! | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| They live in the mountain. | ||
| Watch this. | ||
| Watch this dog. | ||
| She lets this dog out. | ||
| Check this out. | ||
| This dog. | ||
| She lets the dog out. | ||
| Give me the volume because you can hear it. | ||
| Watch this dog. | ||
| Look at this dog. | ||
| That dog is so happy. | ||
| He knows exactly what's going to happen. | ||
| By the way, when I used to take Marshall running in the hills when I lived in California, I would let him out of the truck. | ||
| He would immediately just start running. | ||
| He loved it. | ||
| He was so happy. | ||
| Look at this dog. | ||
| Just leap. | ||
| That's a joy. | ||
| So happy. | ||
| That's like dogs play. | ||
| I know. | ||
| I mean, cats play too, right? | ||
| Maya have a black lab and she just wants to play 24 hours a day. | ||
| And I feel so bad when you're just lazy and you're just sitting around and she's like, gets a thing in her mouth like, let's go. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it's like. | ||
| Labs are the best. | ||
| They're so nice. | ||
| So nice. | ||
| I have a golden retriever, but he's, you know, it's the same thing. | ||
| They're both super, super sweet dogs. | ||
| So emotional and smart. | ||
| Sweet. | ||
| So sweet. | ||
| What's fucked is, people turned them into that. | ||
| Like, all these dogs, at one point in time, you go down the genetic history, they used to be wolves. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They used to be a wolf that came near the fire, and we gave them some food, and they eventually domesticated them, and then they turned them into poodles. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I mean, that is what, I don't know how the fuck they did it, and we really don't know. | ||
| A lot of inbreeding, and we also have a pug, and that is not really a dog. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They're the most inbred, right? | ||
| Or whatever they are. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| You know what's so funny? | ||
| He's funny-looking to begin with, and then if we're sitting outside in the sun, you can see everything. | ||
| It's like, you're a mess. | ||
| His little nose goes off to the side. | ||
| His jaw is kind of weird. | ||
| They're lovable, but man. | ||
| This is what's happening to humans. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, this is why the conversation about a dad bot is even happening. | ||
| It's because at one point in time, there wouldn't be any thought about it. | ||
| Like, you want a Viking. | ||
| Viking is going to survive the war. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know, you don't want... | ||
| But we don't need that anymore. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Now you go to the metaverse. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Yeah, and you sit around. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Look at that little fella. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Look at little Frank. | ||
| Look at that little fella. | ||
| That one point in time... | ||
| That's my dog. | ||
| If you follow that... | ||
| Is that your dog? | ||
| That's my Frank, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, that's Frank. | ||
| He's a little cutie. | ||
| Yeah, he's so cute. | ||
| If you follow that dog's genetics, you go all the way back, you find a wolf. | ||
| I mean, how many thousands and thousands and thousands of years ago? | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| That was a wolf, and somehow or another they turned it into a little tiny, flat-in-a-faced little thing that can't feed itself. | ||
| No, and they literally bred those dogs to cuddle with the humans. | ||
| The emperors used to have these big sleeves, and they would be inside them and cuddle them, and that's what he is. | ||
| Like, if you watch TV, he just, who's ever there, it's not, it's just whatever warm human being, he climbs up and just lays on you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And it's just... | ||
| And you can't get up. | ||
| Remember when your kids were really little and they would just lay on you? | ||
| You couldn't even reach your phone because you didn't want to disturb them. | ||
| It was so peaceful and warm and beautiful. | ||
| That's what the bug does. | ||
| Except he's snoring and slobbering at the same time. | ||
| There's no need for them to be ferocious. | ||
| There's no need for them to have strong jaws that can crush bones anymore. | ||
| So they slowly turned into what... | ||
| And that's what's happening to people. | ||
| That's what's happening to humans. | ||
| We used to be, you know, like Neanderthals were like 5'5", 200 pounds, solid muscle, dense bones, thick heads. | ||
| And then we slowly became, you know, what you see now. | ||
| These sort of doughy things that break their hips when they fall down. | ||
| Remember WALL-E? You remember that animated film? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't think I saw that. | ||
| It was good. | ||
| I think I saw a part of it. | ||
| No, I don't think I saw the whole thing. | ||
| Jeff Garland was the lead voice. | ||
| And they were just in these... | ||
| They were like baby people. | ||
| They were just all chubby. | ||
| And they were in these little walkers. | ||
| And they just laid there. | ||
| And they had iPad kind of things around them. | ||
| We are moving in that direction. | ||
| They weren't that far off. | ||
| The only thing that could save us is Putin. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Putin in this war. | ||
| Oh yeah, there they are. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Yeah, that's us. | ||
| Big sodas glide around. | ||
| Humans are going in that direction, that's for damn sure. | ||
| Yeah, just soft mush balls. | ||
| And denying that that's unhealthy. | ||
| That's what's really crazy. | ||
| The whole body acceptance movement and fat phobia, which is so crazy. | ||
| It's so crazy. | ||
| Here we are doing something unhealthy but awesome, smoking cigars, right? | ||
| It's really good, by the way. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I love it. | |
| If we're smoking cigarettes or smoking all day, it'd be foolish for anybody to try to pretend that that's not bad for you. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's bad for you. | ||
| Yeah, it's terrible. | ||
| I mean, this is marginally bad for you because you're not inhaling, you take a little bit. | ||
| You have a couple of cigarettes, those are not good for you. | ||
| You have a pack of cigarettes, that's not good for you. | ||
| You have a pack a day, like, ooh, you got a problem, Mike. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Like, how many years do you think you can go doing that? | ||
| No, I know. | ||
| You know? | ||
| I have a friend of mine who, he says that he would just smoke a couple a day and just had a heart attack. | ||
| And that was the first question. | ||
| How old was he? | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's probably 65. Does he drink too? | |
| No, I don't think he's a drinker. | ||
| Overweight? | ||
| No, dad bod. | ||
| Sometimes 65 year olds have heart attacks and they're not taking care of themselves. | ||
| Yeah, I mean he doesn't work out or do anything like that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Your body slowly deteriorates, my friend. | |
| It atrophies. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| You know, it atrophies. | ||
| If you could see a time lapse of what you used to look like over the course of when you're 18 years old and full of piss and vinegar. | ||
| Yeah, my God. | ||
| Slowly watch your body expand. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know. | |
| Your shoulders shrink. | ||
| I know. | ||
| And you shrink. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And your body shrinks, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Old people shrink. | ||
| I'm shrinking. | ||
| I'm shorter than I used to be. | ||
| You are? | ||
| Yeah, my discs are less... | ||
| There's less meat in between my discs. | ||
| I have some... | ||
| They're way less significant now than they were before because I've taken care of it and done a lot of therapies for them and Regenikine and stem cells. | ||
| I do spinal decompression. | ||
| That's what sciatica is. | ||
| A lot of what sciatica is is your disc is protruding because it's compressing and your disc is pushing against the nerves and you get that pain that goes down your leg. | ||
| That's what that is. | ||
| That's your discs. | ||
| So that shrinks you. | ||
| As those discs compress, that disc makes your space in between the two spinal columns. | ||
| And as you see old people, when they start to shrivel up like that, that's what's going on, is that all the disc material, it's posture, and it's also they lack the strength in their back and the strength in their core to support themselves in a straight posture. | ||
| But when you see that slump, that's what's going on, man, is the disc is shrinking, and it creates all this arthritis and pain. | ||
| Doesn't it feel like tech, like medical advancement, like we should be able to be getting out of this stuff? | ||
| Well, they kind of can, but it's tricky. | ||
| Like, I was just talking to Michael Bisping, who was a former UFC middleweight champion who was on the podcast last week. | ||
| And he has an artificial disc in his neck. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that's because his discs compress to the point where it was kind of like bone on bone. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oof. | |
| And it was fucked, so they had to put in a new disc. | ||
| So that brings your neck back to kind of a normal size. | ||
| But then the problem is, that's one disc, and the discs above and below start getting fucked. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| So he's about to get two new discs above and below that one. | ||
| Jeez, so now you're chasing it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| My friend Eddie, Eddie Bravo, he got one on his lower back. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And he gained an inch in height from it. | ||
| Yeah, a friend of mine. | ||
| They have to separate your discs and they shoved it. | ||
| Because he was basically bone on bone on his lower back. | ||
| So he was in pain. | ||
| In pain all the time. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Constant agony. | ||
| But the thing is, that thing sometimes, Even though they do that and it's better, sometimes you still have pain. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| My buddy just had it done, and he's very active. | ||
| And I don't know if they fused it or they put one in, like you're saying, but he couldn't believe that he had been living with pain for as long as he was. | ||
| Like, the difference was so great. | ||
| Oh, that's awesome. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's a great story. | ||
| Yeah, great story. | ||
| When that happens, that's awesome. | ||
| But it doesn't always happen. | ||
| Even his daughter was like, you're less cranky. | ||
| He was just dealing with it. | ||
| Is he athletic? | ||
| Yeah, he is. | ||
| He's very active. | ||
| They have these titanium discs that are articulated. | ||
| Michael Bisping, by the way, also has two artificial knees. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| And he's in his 40s. | ||
| Oh, bionic. | ||
| And he looks very fit. | ||
| If you looked at him, you would never think there's anything wrong with him. | ||
| But his neck is in constant pain. | ||
| His knees are, like, they take the top of your femur and the top of your tibia, your shinbone. | ||
| They saw it off and screw this cap in place. | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| And he was tapping it on the microphone, and he'd hear it go click, click, click, click, click, click. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| I mean, we know so many people who've gotten new hips. | ||
| And I said to my wife, how amazing a world where you can do that. | ||
| All these people walking around with new hips and able to live their lives. | ||
| Not just live their lives. | ||
| My friend John Wayne Parr, he's a multiple time world Muay Thai champion. | ||
| He got a fake hip and now he's fighting again. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Like he got it fixed. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And now he went back. | ||
| Pull up John Wayne Parr on Instagram. | ||
| There's videos of him kicking the pads. | ||
| And by the way, he's kicking with his left leg. | ||
| His left leg is the one that's fucked. | ||
| And so the guy's holding the pads and he's like... | ||
| He's kicking with like they saw your fucking leg and they put a screw that goes down into the bone and then you have a new like ball and socket. | ||
| You're a robot. | ||
| It's crazy because when he told me he was gonna get it done, I was like, oh, I felt so bad because here's a guy that's this warrior that's like world renowned. | ||
| Like when I met him, it was like I was so thrilled to meet him. | ||
| This is John Wayne Parr. | ||
| I've seen him fight so many times. | ||
| He's kicking the bag. | ||
| So, I think he's going to kick this bag. | ||
| I'm going to see if he kicks it with his left leg. | ||
| How old is he there, Joe? | ||
| He's in his 40s. | ||
| So this is he's kicking with his opposite leg. | ||
| That's his right leg. | ||
| But there's videos of him kicking with the left leg. | ||
| See, the left leg is the one that he had operated on. | ||
| That's him there kicking with the left leg. | ||
| Bam. | ||
| So that leg that he's kicking with, he's demonstrating some techniques. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And that left leg, he has an artificial hip, man. | ||
| And look how fucking hard he's kicking. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Give me some volume so you can hear this. | ||
| It's like he's 18. Listen to this. | ||
| Listen to this. | ||
| What's that sound? | ||
| I mean, that motherfucker, you don't want to catch that on the chops. | ||
| No, that'll take out your ribs. | ||
| He's doing this with a fucking fake, a fake hit. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| Isn't that amazing? | ||
| That is amazing. | ||
| At that age? | ||
| Come on. | ||
| I mean, you know, I have friends at that age that do not move. | ||
| Bro, he's ten years younger than me. | ||
| Yeah, it's crazy. | ||
| That's what's fucked. | ||
| He's ten years younger than me. | ||
| I don't have those problems yet. | ||
| Is there a main supplement that you would take as a Anti-aging thing. | ||
| Yeah, well, there's no main. | ||
| There's many, many, many, many things you should take when you get older. | ||
| Like, hormones are a big one. | ||
| Hormone replacement's a big one, like replacing your testosterone. | ||
| I had a lot of friends who used to make fun of me for taking testosterone back in the day, and they're usually younger than me. | ||
| And I'm like, now they're thinking about it. | ||
| I'm like, haha, told you, bitch. | ||
| I'm like, what do you want to do? | ||
| Do you want to live your life where you don't have energy? | ||
| I had a conversation about it with a friend of mine, and he was like, well, why do you take it? | ||
| I go, because I want my body to work better. | ||
| When you're younger and you have hormones, your body heals better and it works better. | ||
| It's really that simple. | ||
| It's really that simple. | ||
| You can say, is vanity involved? | ||
| Of course, I like looking good. | ||
| Who likes looking like shit? | ||
| You can pretend you like it, but it's probably because you're trying to make an excuse for why you don't put in the effort to look good. | ||
| But at the end of the day, your body doesn't perform as well without the proper hormones. | ||
| And you get to a certain point in your life as you get older and older and older where your body... | ||
| So my thought was like, nip that shit in the bud early. | ||
| Where I'm on the decline and my doctor is like, this is what you do. | ||
| You just take a little bit, a tiny amount, like every three days. | ||
| I take a tiny amount and it just raises you back up. | ||
| And it raises you up to a healthy level. | ||
| You don't want to have a lot. | ||
| where you get too much, where your body doesn't work properly. | ||
| But now it's mainstream. | ||
| It's normal. | ||
| So many men that I know that you would never guess are supplementing their testosterone. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And it's just to feel better. | ||
| It's to feel better. | ||
| It wards off injury. | ||
| It wards off sickness. | ||
| It makes your immune system function better. | ||
| What is the thing, like if you had something in you, like a precancerous something or other, That's growth hormone. | ||
| That's growth hormone. | ||
| That it accelerates the bad stuff as much as the good. | ||
| I'd take peptides for growth. | ||
| What peptides do is it makes your body produce growth hormone. | ||
| It makes it produce it at a higher level, which facilitates healing and recovery better. | ||
| But that's another thing, though. | ||
| You've got to make sure you don't take too much. | ||
| Bodybuilders take crazy amounts. | ||
| And that's not safe. | ||
| At a certain point in time, you're running the risk of something growing inside you. | ||
| But it's also manipulating your diet, making sure that you don't take in foods that are inflammatory and One of the things that when I switched over to this diet where I basically eat just meat and fruit, I lost weight, I felt slimmer, and I stopped having joint pain, which was kind of crazy. | ||
| You know what's weird? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| After I fell on the ice, which sounds so old to begin with, but I slipped on the ice, and it's been messed up. | ||
| I felt whatever. | ||
| I had pizza. | ||
| We had pizza. | ||
| It inflamed it. | ||
| I was in so much pain after eating pizza. | ||
| Yeah, it's in flames. | ||
| Right. | ||
| In flames. | ||
| Those foods are delicious. | ||
| I fucking love pizza. | ||
| Yeah, of course. | ||
| But you felt the impact of it. | ||
| Yeah, but when I was young, I used to love coming home from Jiu-Jitsu and eating a whole pizza. | ||
| I'll get a giant pizza, pepperoni, and mushrooms. | ||
| And I would crush an entire pizza while I was watching TV. I was like, fuck it, I just did an hour and a half of jiu-jitsu. | ||
| I could eat this pizza. | ||
| I could eat this damn pizza. | ||
| It's a hormone. | ||
| Yeah, because I went for a physical, and I hope this isn't too boring, but I went for a physical and he was like, your testosterone levels are fine. | ||
| And I was like... | ||
| I bet he's saying that for my age. | ||
| It's like when your wife says you look good. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| For your age, for someone who's dying, that's a pretty good, but it's not the level you want. | ||
| It's not optimum. | ||
| Right. | ||
| If you changed it, if you started adding to your testosterone, you'd feel a lot better. | ||
| It's everyone that I know that does it, they all call me up and go, oh my god, I feel so much better. | ||
| Can I get it on Amazon? | ||
| You can get some stuff on Amazon that supposedly stimulates your body's production of testosterone. | ||
| One thing that does work, there's a thing that's a plant-based compound called terkesterone. | ||
| And this is, I found out from the same guy, Derek, from More Plates, More Dates. | ||
| Oh, you didn't pull up that video of that guy that died from overworking out. | ||
| Oh God, yeah. | ||
| We're talking about people that have sicknesses. | ||
| Any kind of mental sickness. | ||
| Whether it's gambling or... | ||
| Alcohol, whatever. | ||
| A lot of it is the same thing. | ||
| It's like people fixate on a thing. | ||
| So this is the guy. | ||
| His name was Scott Murray. | ||
| That kid? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They said he had mental health issues already. | ||
| And then... | ||
| See if you can find what he looked like. | ||
| But he did not eat much. | ||
| He tried to keep his body mass very, very lean. | ||
| And he worked out so hard that he literally wound up dying. | ||
| Oh, he was sick. | ||
| See if they have any images of what he looked like when he was in full... | ||
| That's why I didn't pull it up earlier. | ||
| Oh, they didn't have any images of it. | ||
| See, like Scott Murray. | ||
| Pull up Scott Murray physique. | ||
| Pull up Scott Murray physique. | ||
| Because he was fucking shredded. | ||
| This guy was carrying around a very low percentage of body fat all year long. | ||
| There's an image of him there. | ||
| Fitness trainer and YouTube diet planner Scott Murray passed away. | ||
| So this is what he started at and that's what he became while he was on YouTube. | ||
| So look at the difference in the two images. | ||
| It says his death was brought on by an eating disorder and excessive exercise. | ||
| Jeez, that's sad. | ||
| Yeah, so you can literally work yourself to death. | ||
| Yeah, of course. | ||
| We always hear that about people that, like, they work 16 hours a day, they're constantly stressed out, and they have a heart attack and die. | ||
| That's kind of the same vein of things. | ||
| Yeah, your brain just starts going off in a weird direction. | ||
| It's hard to know when to chill. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And when you're a person that's obsessive and you're trying to accomplish something, if you're in a competitive business and you're putting in all the hours in the office or bodybuilding or whatever the fuck it is, people get crazy. | ||
| Look at the difference there. | ||
| See, he maintained around 5% body fat year-round, natural, and was burning roughly 5,500 calories per day. | ||
| His workouts would typically burn around 1,400 calories. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| That is incredible. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's a lot. | |
| That's so much. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He just got obsessed with getting... | ||
| Did you see that doc of the Mr. Olympia? | ||
| The guy who had the most Mr. Olympia's... | ||
| Ronnie Coleman? | ||
| Ronnie Coleman? | ||
| Was it Ronnie Coleman? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Ronnie's been on the podcast. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| He's fucked, unfortunately. | ||
| His body is... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| When he was on the podcast, he came in a wheelchair. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Yeah, that's what they were showing. | ||
| He was such a sweet, beautiful person. | ||
| He's the nicest guy ever. | ||
| He still looks good. | ||
| I mean, he's still fucking strong as shit. | ||
| And by the way, back surgeries. | ||
| Right. | ||
| His whole back is fused. | ||
| I think he's had nine discs fused. | ||
| Look at what he looked like when he was in his prime. | ||
| God. | ||
| My God. | ||
| Ronnie Coleman's a legend and nicest guy you ever could meet. | ||
| That's what came through in the doc. | ||
| It was just like, everybody loved him. | ||
| Look at the fucking size of him! | ||
| Look at that picture! | ||
| Oh my god, look at that bicep! | ||
| Bro, he was unstoppable. | ||
| When he was on top, he was unstoppable. | ||
| Unstoppable. | ||
| But he's so dedicated that he kind of destroyed his body. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Because Ronnie, unlike a lot of these Mr. Olympias, he used to lift heavy, heavy weights. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And that's what hurt him. | ||
| And by the way, he said on the podcast when he blew his back out, he finished the set. | ||
| Really? | ||
| He was in agony, but he was so tough. | ||
| He's like, fuck that. | ||
| I'm going to keep going. | ||
| Look at the weight on that. | ||
| Look at the weight! | ||
| Yeah, that's Ronnie Coleman, man. | ||
| I mean, listen, you only get to be a legend in that sport, like to be that big, by being a fucking fanatic. | ||
| So how did Arnold balance it? | ||
| Because Arnold looks like he's doing great. | ||
| He's doing fairly well, comparatively. | ||
| He can walk around and do stuff. | ||
| Unlike Lee, but Ronnie rather, I don't think Lee Haney was another guy that was built like that too, but Dorian Yates is a great example. | ||
| He's a guy that was on this podcast and he has quite a few injuries, like his shoulders are kind of fucked up and everything like that, but he concentrates on cardiovascular fitness now. | ||
| He smokes a lot of weed. | ||
| He was very chill. | ||
| And Dorian, that's what he looks like now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
See, Steve looks good. | |
| He looks good. | ||
| But he can move around good. | ||
| That was how big he was back then. | ||
| That's him next to Ronnie Coleman. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God. | |
| Look at those. | ||
| Preposterous. | ||
| It looks like those turkeys when they get too big on the breasts when they try and get the breasts going. | ||
| Or those cows when they take the myostatin inhibitors. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| Look at that back. | ||
| Man, oh man. | ||
| But Dorian is very healthy now. | ||
| He's got a great attitude about it. | ||
| Oh, that's good. | ||
| Was Dorian the one who couldn't beat Coleman all those years? | ||
| No, no. | ||
| He was a multiple champion. | ||
| I'm not exactly sure what happened when him and... | ||
| Did they compete against each other? | ||
| There was one guy who was like... | ||
| Coleman just kept edging him out in the dock. | ||
| Well, I'm sure. | ||
| There's probably quite a few. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Cohen was the fucking man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| But Dorian was a multiple-time champion. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think there was a different era. | ||
| I think... | ||
| The Shadow versus the King. | ||
| 93, 99. Oh, yeah. | ||
| He was before. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| Jeez Louise. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I would have to go into the history of it, but they're both former Mr. Olympias and they're both legends. | ||
| And Dorian was known as being like one of the most, for his time, one of the most massive guys anybody had ever seen. | ||
| God, look at those thighs. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| God. | ||
| Crazy. | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| 1997, Ronnie was in 2005. So Ronnie came afterwards. | ||
| Look at the size of Ronnie. | ||
| Look at the sides of them! | ||
| Alright, I'm gonna get some testosterone. | ||
| You're gonna need a lot more than that, bro. | ||
| The only way you get that big is incredible amounts of work and incredible amounts of steroids. | ||
| That's all steroids, yeah. | ||
| That's a sport where there are Natural bodybuilders, and they look really good. | ||
| Right. | ||
| There's natural bodybuilders. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They really do exist. | ||
| And they look great. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They look a lot better than me. | ||
| And they don't do anything. | ||
| They just eat well and work out. | ||
| All natural. | ||
| They never look like Ronnie Coleman. | ||
| No. | ||
| No. | ||
| And Ronnie was like a gifted, genetically gifted guy who openly admitted he said he couldn't compete. | ||
| With the guys who did steroids. | ||
| So he didn't do steroids, I think he said, until he was 30. And then when he was 30, or I forget what age it was, but then when he started doing steroids, then he hit his legendary form. | ||
| These are all natural. | ||
| Those are natural guys? | ||
| I mean, I don't know if they all are, but I just typed it in. | ||
| It's possible to, like that guy with the board shorts right there, the colorful board shorts, click on that one, Jamie. | ||
| That is possible to achieve. | ||
| Right. | ||
| That's possible to achieve naturally. | ||
| I mean, that guy must work out incredibly hard, diets well, that's natural. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| That guy probably is fanatical in his fitness. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fanatical. | |
| His diet. | ||
| But the difference between him and a guy like Dorian Yates is pretty significant. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Now go to Dorian Yates. | ||
| Look at that black and white picture of Dorian down there on the far right, Jamie. | ||
| Where are my fingers? | ||
| Yeah, next to that. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| What the fuck, dude? | ||
| But are they funny? | ||
| He's actually funny. | ||
| Dorian's a fun guy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I really enjoyed having him on the podcast. | ||
| I would imagine. | ||
| Whenever someone is... | ||
| I enjoy talking to someone that has just achieved insane levels of accomplishment in anything. | ||
| Oh my god, yeah. | ||
| Whether it's software design or fucking... | ||
| They're so impressive. | ||
| People who can do... | ||
| They're inspirational. | ||
| But you gotta... | ||
| Is there a time where you can't do that anymore? | ||
| How long can you compete at a certain level of RPMs before your brain or your body... | ||
| Yeah, there's a limit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| So like I said, 25 push-ups, you know, at a pop. | ||
| 25's good. | ||
| It's good. | ||
| That's good. | ||
| Well, you know why? | ||
| How often do you do it? | ||
| Because you look at every day. | ||
| You do 100 push-ups a day? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Really? | ||
| That's very good, dude. | ||
| Thanks, man. | ||
| That's very good. | ||
| But it's like... | ||
| The least you could do. | ||
| That's not the least you could do. | ||
| You do one. | ||
| It's pretty much the least you could do. | ||
| One is the least you could do. | ||
| Yeah, but you know, flailing those kettlebells and it's like, you just feel it. | ||
| You could start, you're just feeling like, I was at the, I've said this before, but you're at the pool and you see these guys walk around, the dad bod guys, they got nothing left. | ||
| It's just like, you know, over their shoulders. | ||
| When I see guys' shoulders and it's just kind of like bone. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And skin. | ||
| And I always think, oh my God, you're going to get hurt. | ||
| Right. | ||
| That guy's going to open up a mayonnaise jar and pull out his rotator cuff. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know. | |
| I just don't want to do that. | ||
| I don't want to be that. | ||
| Have you ever thought about hiring a trainer? | ||
| No. | ||
| I can get you one if you want one. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| Yeah, I know a lot of guys. | ||
| Do I have to go somewhere? | ||
| Let me get the hormones so I'm motivated enough to go. | ||
| Do you have weights at your house? | ||
| I do. | ||
| I have dumbbells and the bike. | ||
| Someone could come to your house and just with dumbbells give you a phenomenal workout. | ||
| Just body weight and dumbbells. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, just commit to doing it two times a week. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And then, you know, ramp it up. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Up to three times a week. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| You know, make sure you have recovery time. | ||
| You know, you do Monday, Wednesday, Friday. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| And then. | ||
| You'll see improvements for sure. | ||
| You know what's hard is the road. | ||
| When you're on the road, it's so hard. | ||
| I'm always like, no, this week I'm going to do it. | ||
| And you're on the road and it's like, my go-to is yoga when I'm on the road. | ||
| I'll do yoga in the room. | ||
| It's hard. | ||
| Yoga in the room is good. | ||
| If you go to a class, it's better. | ||
| Oh, of course. | ||
| Yeah, if you can force yourself to go to a class. | ||
| Those little adjustments that they just come over to you, it makes all the difference. | ||
| Yeah, and it's also like you have to keep up with the pace of the class. | ||
| You can't just fuck off and take a shit. | ||
| You're in that class, man. | ||
| You're locked in for 90 minutes with your little bottle of water, and you've got to make that water last. | ||
| I know. | ||
| No, it's a big difference. | ||
| Well, now that we're coming out of the pandemic, I go to classes again. | ||
| I can't believe you never caught COVID. That's amazing. | ||
| Never caught it. | ||
| That's incredible. | ||
| Especially with this Omicron. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Everybody caught that. | ||
| And I was touring heavy. | ||
| I've been out, and at a certain point, I was like, I'm just going to sign books. | ||
| Depending on where I would go, if the audience... | ||
| Didn't have to wear a mask if that city and that theater was saying... | ||
| I was like, I'm just going to go. | ||
| I'm just going to do it. | ||
| Good for you. | ||
| Yeah, I never caught it. | ||
| Well, you know what? | ||
| If you have the right protocol in place into how to take care of yourself once, if you did get sick, if you were ready for it, you could be okay. | ||
| It's just, you know, you're a relatively young, healthy guy, and you're vaccinated, and you're out there. | ||
| I was vaxxed and boosted in my little baggies in my backpack. | ||
| Vitamins. | ||
| Yeah, with all the zinc and the stuff. | ||
| That made a big difference, I'm sure. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, that's one of the things that they said about vitamin D in particular. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Was that some ungodly number at one point in time, I think it was like in the high 70s, I think it was like 78% of the people that were in the ICU with COVID had insufficient levels of vitamin D. Wow. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| It's a big factor with your immune system, vitamin D, because they call it a vitamin, but it's really a hormone. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Yeah, Dr. Rhonda Patrick was explaining it to me, and she's like, they shouldn't even call it a vitamin, because it's really a hormone that you get from the sun. | ||
| Right. | ||
| My friend Kira Soltanovich, you know Kira, she was saying you've got to take it with K, K2. Yeah, it helps absorption. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| She was like, don't just take it on its own. | ||
| So then I changed it to that. | ||
| It's like if you take zinc, you're supposed to take zinc with quercetin or curcumin or some kind of an ionophore. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But to have someone who can go over your blood work and look at your nutrient levels and make sure you're taking the right stuff, it's so beneficial. | ||
| Because you think about your expertise in comedy. | ||
| Now, if you had someone who was just starting out and they were doing everything all wrong, you'd be like, don't headline right away. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Don't do that joke. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Exactly. | |
| You'd be able to talk to them and tell them how to do comedy. | ||
| They can do that with how to eat. | ||
| They can do that with how to exercise. | ||
| It's always worth bringing in an expert. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| A real expert. | ||
| Yeah, no, you're right. | ||
| Because I've had a bunch of workouts with real high-level fitness trainers. | ||
| And I work out here in town with my friend John Wolf, who's the head trainer at the Onnit gym. | ||
| I work out with him all the time. | ||
| It helps a lot. | ||
| It does help. | ||
| It helps so much, man. | ||
| Because he'll make me do, like, mobility exercises and shit that I don't really want to do. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Yeah, you get into your own pattern. | ||
| You're doing something that's better than not doing anything. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But having someone else just be like, ah, change this. | ||
| You're like, oh, right, I feel this now. | ||
| Also, to make someone who does things on their time, like, you want a certain amount of rest in between. | ||
| They only give you the rest they think you need. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Get back at it. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| They're trying to build you up, whereas you're just trying to maintain a comfort level while you're at the gym. | ||
| Yeah, right, exactly. | ||
| You know, if you don't see people fucking around with their phone and talking to their friends. | ||
| Yeah, reading the paper on the treadmill. | ||
| Yeah, and having some reason to fuck off with a buddy, you know, laugh and joke around. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| You really should be doing another set. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| No, that's good. | ||
| It's also the thing about going to a gym that's great is the culture of the people there. | ||
| Especially On It Gym is great because everyone there is trying to better themselves. | ||
| So when you are there and you see all these super fit people that are working out hard and trying to better themselves, you get into this mindset and then the momentum of that kind of carries on in your life. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Nice. | ||
| That is a good thing. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| I'm on the bike. | ||
| I just have Frank the Pug walking by. | ||
| That's okay too. | ||
|
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|
Listen, that's fucking way better than not doing it. | |
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| It's all about, you know, just like how much time do you have for that? | ||
| How much energy do you have for that? | ||
| You don't want to overdo it where it takes away from other things that you do. | ||
| No, of course. | ||
| That fucking guy that died, he obviously went too far. | ||
| He was going crazy. | ||
| You don't want to go crazy. | ||
| It actually, in the right dose, staves off the crazy. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| I mean, you know, during the pandemic, it was like, if I didn't work out, it was like, you're a different guy after two days. | ||
| It's so good for anxiety. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| It feels so much better. | ||
| Yeah, my friends who have anxiety who don't exercise, I'm like, man, it's like you're not taking your medicine. | ||
| Right, exactly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You can help yourself. | ||
| You'd be in the shittiest, worst mood, and then you do it, and you're like, what was I complaining about? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| What didn't I like? | ||
| You have a lot more empathy for people after you do that, too, which is interesting. | ||
| Patience for people. | ||
| Empathy. | ||
| Yeah, you're right. | ||
| Why is that? | ||
| I think a lot of our reactions to other people are based on how we feel internally, physically how you feel. | ||
| I think we carry around a lot of stress whether we realize it or not. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I feel way better when I stretch. | ||
| Even if I'm not going to work out, just a long stretching session, I feel better. | ||
| Totally. | ||
| Because you're carrying around less tension. | ||
| You're alleviating tension in your body that alleviates it in your mind, and you just feel better. | ||
| That's the yoga key, right? | ||
| You come out of there, you're blissed out. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| You're so much more compassionate towards people when you do yoga. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So good. | ||
| It's great. | ||
| So, Duncan's coming back to LA. Is he? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| 100%? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I wouldn't bet on that. | ||
| He said he was. | ||
| When did you talk to him? | ||
| We started doing this podcast together. | ||
| When did you just start doing this? | ||
| Like a couple months ago. | ||
| We haven't released it yet. | ||
| We just love each other. | ||
| We never really hung out. | ||
| I just love talking to him so much. | ||
| So we've just been talking. | ||
| He said, we're like, should we do this? | ||
| Because we have so much fun. | ||
| We're like, you want to do something together like this? | ||
| And he's like... | ||
| I'm moving back, man. | ||
| I'm coming. | ||
| He was coming here, too, so I wouldn't count on it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I'm coming to Austin, man. | ||
| No, man. | ||
| I miss it. | ||
| Last time we did a podcast together, I was sitting in that seat. | ||
| He sat in this seat, and he wore a ghillie suit, and I wore a wig. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| We both wore wigs, right? | ||
| We burned candles. | ||
| We had candles all over the table. | ||
| He's so crazy. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Did we take mushrooms? | ||
| Did we take mushrooms? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Really? | ||
| I don't think we took mushrooms. | ||
| But we were baked out of our fucking minds. | ||
| He's one of my favorite people to hang out with because he's so uniquely Duncan. | ||
| So much so. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it just feels like, yeah, just talking to him is just great. | ||
| He's the best. | ||
| He's such a sweet person too. | ||
| Like genuinely nice. | ||
| You're going to see Joe. | ||
| Give that werewolf a kiss for me. | ||
| Give that werewolf a kiss. | ||
| We have a new version of the werewolf. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| You do? | ||
| Yeah, we got a new one. | ||
| Patrick McGee, who's the guy who made the first werewolf. | ||
| Is that still in L.A.? Yeah, but we're going back to get that soon, too. | ||
| But he sent me, I'm going to send you these, Jamie, because they're fucking sweet. | ||
| But he changed this new one where he does it. | ||
| The old one had, some of it was yak hair, and some of it was like this artificial hair, and then the new one, he's using all yak hair. | ||
| And because I had Rick Baker on the podcast, Rick Baker's the guy who did all the special effects for the American Werewolf in London, and he created the first Oh, wow. | ||
| Oh, that is fierce. | ||
| Look at the claws. | ||
| That is fierce. | ||
| Look at his fangs. | ||
| Yeah, he fine-tuned it. | ||
| Patrick McGee does high-level special effects for films. | ||
| That is insane. | ||
| Yeah, the old one was awesome, but this one is awesomer. | ||
| Look at the difference in the muscles. | ||
| Look at the muscles in this thing and the hair. | ||
| So it's all yak hair now. | ||
| So he's not using the synthetic hair anymore. | ||
| He did the whole thing in animal hair. | ||
| It looks twice as scary. | ||
| Yeah, and he brought it down to the size, so it's like a little bigger than me, probably. | ||
| Yeah, you could see that it was human. | ||
| Yeah, that's the idea. | ||
| Like his back. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Fucking awesome. | ||
| Oh, that's amazing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What an artist. | ||
| Oh, he's so good, man. | ||
| He does a lot of stuff for films. | ||
| He does a lot of stuff for monster movies. | ||
| And he's one of those guys. | ||
| Yeah, this is McGee's special effects page. | ||
| Look at his stuff, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jeez. | |
| He's incredible. | ||
| Look at those eyes. | ||
| That's Patrick right there. | ||
| And he's a big giant dude, too. | ||
| When I met him, I was like, holy shit, he's like six foot six. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's huge. | |
| He was a basketball player, and he decided to get into special effects. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Look at that fucking thing. | ||
| Oh, it's scary. | ||
| Because you expect that someone who did this would be like sort of a nerdy introvert. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He's like a big athlete. | ||
| Like look at his work. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| Wild stuff, right? | ||
| Holy cow. | ||
| Isn't that wild? | ||
| Amazing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And what is it? | ||
| McGeeFX on Instagram. | ||
| You can check out all this stuff. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I got to look them up. | ||
| But he's one of those guys, like, look at that, that's his Bigfoot. | ||
| Oof. | ||
| Isn't that dope? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He's a real artist. | ||
| See, there's two schools of thoughts when it comes to special effects for films. | ||
| And one of them is they do CGI, so computer-generated images. | ||
| And then the other one is guys who want to use makeup and prosthetics because they think it moves real and it seems like a real object. | ||
| I believe that. | ||
| It does. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Sometimes you see things in a movie and it looks cool, but it looks fake. | ||
| It takes you out of it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Whereas in American Werewolf in London, which is one of the great horror movies of all time, you didn't see the werewolf that much. | ||
| Get some footage of the werewolf in American Werewolf in London. | ||
| You saw it briefly in these scenes, and that's one of the things that made it so scary. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Is that you weren't staring at it, trying to find holes in it. | ||
| Right, analyzing it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You saw it briefly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it was fucking terrifying. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Wasn't Jack Nicholson a werewolf? | ||
| He was a terrible werewolf. | ||
| He was? | ||
| He was terrible. | ||
| Him and Michelle Pfeiffer. | ||
| Oh, right, right, right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They were like this. | |
| It was so corny. | ||
| It was like, that's a wolf, man. | ||
| Get out of here, bitch. | ||
| Grr. | ||
| They were trying to do... | ||
| There's a whole series of things we could say here. | ||
| Pull up the one from American Werewolf in London, and then we'll do Jack Nicholson, and then we'll do Benicio Del Toro. | ||
| Because Benicio Del Toro did a new version of the old Wolfman. | ||
| So this is when he's turning. | ||
| Yeah, this is great. | ||
| You've got to realize, I think this was the 80s, right? | ||
| Yeah, it was. | ||
| I remember I was in high school. | ||
| So, what year was this? | ||
| 81. 81. 81. My god. | ||
| So I was in high school too. | ||
| So like, this was so radical for the time, this transformation scene where his hands are growing and he's screaming. | ||
| And it was also funny, because like you see... | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is his friend. | |
| I'm sorry I told you to meatloaf because his dead friend was telling him to kill himself. | ||
| His friend came back from the dead, told him to kill himself because you're going to turn into a werewolf. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| He's warning him. | ||
| He's like, what the fuck are you talking about? | ||
| And so this is the first time he changes. | ||
| Good actor, too. | ||
| Oh my god, he was amazing. | ||
| And this scene was fucking incredible, man. | ||
| Because no one had ever seen anything like this before in a film. | ||
| Yeah, I remember. | ||
| The Wolfman stuff before that was kind of corny. | ||
| Yeah, and shadows. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It just didn't seem like it was really happening. | ||
| Good actor, too. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh my god, this fucking movie is one of my all-time favorites. | ||
| And then you had a little Warren Zevon in there. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| God damn, it was good. | ||
| And funny, like Jack, like the face. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Look at this fucking thing. | ||
| God damn, what a movie this was. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| It's really great. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And 1981, man. | |
| And the music, look at the fucking body on that thing. | ||
| Just wild. | ||
| It was also the first time I'd ever seen a werewolf where it was on all fours. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Uh-huh. | |
| Yeah, he wasn't walking around in a suit. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Now see if they show the werewolf in any other scenes, because there's a scene where it's running through Piccadilly Circus. | ||
| I don't have the full movie up. | ||
| I just had that scene. | ||
| Did they have Piccadilly Circus? | ||
| Piccadilly Square. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What's Piccadilly? | |
| Piccadilly Square was the area where it was running through the street, just killing people. | ||
| It was in a nudie theater. | ||
| And he was in a movie theater watching porno with this guy, because that's where the guy told him to meet him there. | ||
| And he's telling them, like, you're going to turn to the werewolf, you're going to kill everybody. | ||
| And so he's in this theater and there's other people in the theater that are like, what the fuck is wrong with this guy? | ||
| And then he turns into the werewolf and see this cop comes in because he hears there's a disturbance. | ||
| I think it already killed a guy in there. | ||
| So some people are in there having sex. | ||
| And the cops walking through the movies. | ||
| He just ate someone. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No guns in London. | |
| So the guy's trying to get people... | ||
| I know, they have sticks. | ||
| Imagine. | ||
| These poor bastards. | ||
| So this thing is in the middle of this porno theater. | ||
| All these cops are trying to hold it back. | ||
| And these people are like, what's going on over there? | ||
| What's happening? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What's happening? | |
| And then eventually the werewolf breaks through that boundary and comes out and starts slaughtering people. | ||
| Go a little before you see it come out. | ||
| What the hell is going on here? | ||
| Open that door. | ||
| Here he comes. | ||
| Oh, and he eats the main guy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, there goes his head. | |
| Now you get it, people. | ||
| Get out of there. | ||
| there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What a fucking scene, man. | |
| That's what movies were movies. | ||
| Fuck yeah, man. | ||
| Look at that thing. | ||
| And it's true. | ||
| If that was animated, you'd be like, yeah, okay. | ||
| Right, you're seeing whatever that thing is, it looks like a real thing is happening there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And it's snapping at people while it's running around. | ||
| Now, go to Jack Nicholson in The Wolf. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| I think they called it Wolf. | ||
| I think it was called Wolf. | ||
| It was him and Michelle Pfeiffer. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Wolf. | ||
| It was corny. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is that it? | |
| Wolfman. | ||
| No, no, that's Wolfman. | ||
| That's Benicio Del Toro. | ||
| That's the next one I'm going to show you. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But Jack Nicholson. | ||
| Oh yeah, there it is. | ||
| Yeah, Wolf Jack Nicholson. | ||
| Versus James Spader, that's right. | ||
| Yeah, they had a super fight. | ||
| Him and that guy from that fucking cop show. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They both became wolves. | ||
| So Michelle Pfeiffer hits him in the head with a fire extinguisher and she's running away and then Look how he runs. | ||
| Look how he runs and tackles her. | ||
| He's in a sweatshirt. | ||
| It's so fake looking. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look. | |
| Jack Nicholson becomes a wolf. | ||
| He throws the keys away. | ||
| I'm gonna kill her. | ||
| I'm gonna kill her. | ||
| I mean, come on. | ||
| Who's more badass than Jack? | ||
| You make a leap like this, you're like, I think it'll work. | ||
| Look, she gets away so easy. | ||
| He has to leap through the air to stop her from getting away. | ||
| It looks so corny. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know how they sold off on this. | |
| Well, you're at the mercy. | ||
| You're thinking, no, there's good people. | ||
| So, if he takes that thing off, is that what turns him into the wolfman again? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Is that what's supposed to be happening? | ||
| Yeah, he locked himself in a cage and wore that thing so he wouldn't hurt people. | ||
| But now he's got a saver. | ||
| It's so corny. | ||
| So he takes the amulet off. | ||
| Look how corny that is. | ||
| Now he's going full wolf. | ||
| I can't believe Jack Nicholson signed off on this. | ||
| I mean, Jack Nicholson has done so many amazing movies. | ||
| Like, look. | ||
| Yeah, but it's too late by the time you're at that point. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oof. | |
| Ooh, the horse is... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, no. | |
| What is he trying to do? | ||
| This is very rapey. | ||
| That's rapey. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| Oh, this is terrible. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Come on, Jack. | ||
| Save her. | ||
| This is taking a long-ass time, Jack. | ||
| Save her, Jack. | ||
| Oh, he jumps over the top. | ||
| Oh, there's no roof. | ||
| Oh, now he's going to land on them. | ||
| So the only thing that changes on these werewolves is their face. | ||
| Yeah, their teeth get a little nasty. | ||
| But it's nothing, like, significant. | ||
| No. | ||
| Like, look at that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah! | |
| And then watch Jack Nuggest. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| This is like people that come to your Halloween party. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And you're like, come on, bro. | ||
| That's all you did? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Right. | ||
| A little effort. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All right. | |
| That's whack. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Now. | |
| Wolfman. | ||
| Benicio Del Toro. | ||
| The scene where he transforms in a hospital. | ||
| So this is one where they had decided that Benicio Del Toro was like a madman. | ||
| Give me some volume. | ||
| He's so good, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
For him, it seems very real. | |
| So they were thinking that this guy was delusional. | ||
| There was something wrong with him. | ||
| So this doctor... | ||
| He's all strapped to a chair. | ||
| Yeah, so they're observing this in this, like, medical theater, because they used to have, like, medical theaters back then. | ||
| So this is also Rick Baker. | ||
| So Rick Baker decided to do, like, an old-school werewolf thing, but to do it right. | ||
| And to do it not CGI all the way, but some CGI. Some CGI and some... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Like, that's CGI, clearly. | |
| But some of it is... | ||
| That's great. | ||
| Yeah, see, like, some of it's CGI. But some of it is, like, physical stuff. | ||
| It's always so creepy when their bones stretch. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, this was the most creepy. | ||
| It was really good. | ||
| Like, the movie was pretty good. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But it... | ||
| I mean, it was close. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, my God. | |
| See, like, when this all takes place, like, these people are freaking out, and they try to get away, and then it eventually becomes, like, this version of, like, it's not quite, like, the American Werewolf in London, but it's not corny like Jackman. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's, like, in the middle. | ||
| Look at this guy. | ||
| He thinks he's gonna, like, trank him. | ||
| He shoots him up with a thing. | ||
| Yeah, he's got a little bit more of a human... | ||
| Yeah, you buy into it more. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hello! | |
| Open the door, you fuck! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Seems to be locked, sir. | |
| I think he pulls out his heart. | ||
| Just eating people. | ||
| It's close enough where I think, okay, at least it's not just a dude with some teeth. | ||
| That looks like a monster. | ||
| Yeah, that's a good one. | ||
| It was good. | ||
| Yeah, it was good. | ||
| But this was like a lot of CGI stuff too. | ||
| Like the werewolf like jumps off the buildings and stuff and it looks corny. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| Like you see it running through the city. | ||
| Like watch this. | ||
| Like watch this. | ||
| When you see it like run over the buildings, it looks kind of corny. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's like they did a hybrid type movie. | ||
| Like a lot of it was like this here. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Like... | |
| I'm hopping from building the building. | ||
| But then here, it's like a real guy running. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But then once he gets hopping, it gets kind of corny. | ||
| Yeah, that all of a sudden is not real. | ||
| And he runs on all fours sometimes. | ||
| It's like that. | ||
| He looks good. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They try. | ||
| Yeah JV's laughing You had to add that But also You don't have to But that sound That sound cannot fuck With the sound That the American Werewolf in London made Yeah. | ||
| The American Werewolf in London sound was so much more ferocious. | ||
| That was a better sound. | ||
| But that was one of those movies where they tried... | ||
| There was an old school... | ||
| Was it Lone Chaney Jr. that played the werewolf? | ||
| Lone Chaney. | ||
| In The Wolfman? | ||
| Who was the original Wolfman. | ||
| Yeah, the OG Wolfman. | ||
| From like the 1950s. | ||
| And those movies were good because there was suspense. | ||
| Like you didn't see a lot. | ||
| So you had to build it up with not seeing it. | ||
| Well, that's what he looked like. | ||
| Yeah, Loan Chaney Jr., the Wolfman. | ||
| So what this Wolfman with Benicio Del Toro was supposed to be was like this thing, but better. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They achieved it, but the reality is it's not quite scary enough. | ||
| No, it wasn't about the effects as much as it was the acting back then. | ||
| But it's like that movie, the Wolfman with Benicio Del Toro was ultimately kind of a failure. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It really didn't. | ||
| Didn't catch? | ||
| No, people were like, come on, man. | ||
| Right. | ||
| What are you doing? | ||
| I see what they're trying to do, but we want a real monster. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| We want a real monster. | ||
| And then Abbott and Costello go against the Wolfman at one point. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, they did? | |
| That's right! | ||
| There's no like comedy teams like that anymore. | ||
| No. | ||
| James Franco and Seth Rogen were like the last comedy team. | ||
| They were in a bunch of films together. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Oh, look at that. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Oh, but also, who else was, what the fuck's his name? | ||
| From Step Brothers. | ||
| Oh, Farrell and John C. Reilly? | ||
| That's right. | ||
| Those two guys have been in a bunch of movies. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's probably the best comedy team. | ||
| They are. | ||
| Step Brothers, Talladega Knights. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That's right. | ||
| They're our modern team. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Then there's... | ||
| Talladega Nights is amazing. | ||
| So funny. | ||
| Stepbrother's so damn funny. | ||
| Fuck yeah, so funny. | ||
| You couldn't do that movie today, man. | ||
| I watched it with my family during the pandemic, and I was like, whoa, there's a lot of racy humor in this. | ||
| Well, it starts off, I just showed it to my daughters, too. | ||
| The first real gag is putting the testicles on the... | ||
| On the symbols. | ||
| My daughter's like, what are you showing us? | ||
|
unidentified
|
But it's a lot of it. | |
| It's like homophobia jokes. | ||
| There's like a lot of jokes. | ||
| You just can't. | ||
| It's weird today. | ||
| You can't just joke around about certain things now because of social media and the outrage, recreational outrage that's sort of blossomed from it. | ||
| Yeah, there was a lot of bad taste back then, but at least there was the freedom to make stuff. | ||
| There was, like, bad comedies. | ||
| Every year there'd be a boatload of bad comedies just swinging for the fences, and then every once in a while one of them would hit. | ||
| But the ones that hit, today, when you go back and watch them, like, you know, if comics are getting canceled for old jokes, like, geez, Louise, go back and watch some of those films. | ||
| Revenge of the Nerds. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Revenge of the Nerds. | ||
| Those guys were creeps. | ||
| The nerds were creeps. | ||
| They were so rapey. | ||
| They put spy gear all over the sorority house? | ||
| Yeah, they're perving out on all the girls, and then they switch his costumes, and he goes and has sex with the girl, and she thinks it's with the other guy. | ||
| It's essentially raping her. | ||
| You remember Superbad? | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| Dude, that movie. | ||
| You remember Superbad. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| What about that? | ||
| The movie is filled with crazy humor. | ||
| I tried watching that movie. | ||
| That was the one when they started out the movie like he was drawing all those dicks. | ||
| It didn't start out with that. | ||
| That was in the movie, right? | ||
| That's a fucking hilarious movie, but it starts out, they're talking about porno. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And I was trying to watch it with my kids, and I was like, okay, stop, stop, stop, stop. | ||
| I forgot. | ||
| Like, I forgot. | ||
| 16 Candles? | ||
| I haven't seen that in forever. | ||
| Same thing. | ||
| Is it really? | ||
| Yeah, she's all drunk at the end. | ||
| He just gives her to the nerd. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Take her, man. | ||
| Do what you want. | ||
| There were so many movies like that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I remember Animal House. | ||
| That whole scene where the girl was out unconscious. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And he pulled the stuffing out of her bra. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| He had the devil and the angel. | ||
| Yes, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, not good. | ||
| It doesn't hold up. | ||
| I mean, how many Judd Apatow movies that he put out would just never fly today? | ||
| Never. | ||
| And that's not that long ago. | ||
| That's what my point is. | ||
| Animal House was in the fucking, what was that? | ||
| The 70s. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The Apatow movies were in the 2000s. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's quick. | ||
| The invention of social media changed everybody's acceptance of what is okay to joke around. | ||
| Did you ever see this movie? | ||
| It came out. | ||
| I was trying to figure out what it was called. | ||
| It was in the background of the Ghislaine Maxwell photo. | ||
| This photo thing, the movie poster was. | ||
| No, I didn't see it. | ||
| Was it good? | ||
| I mean, it came out two years ago. | ||
| It's about a bunch of young teenagers, probably 12, 10. It's irreverent as fuck. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Is it funny? | ||
| It's a dirty movie. | ||
| It's pretty funny. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But I mean, it wasn't one of those things that you're like, oh my god, you gotta go see it, kind of. | ||
| It didn't cross that level. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Yeah, I wouldn't want to make a comedy today, man. | ||
| Very tricky. | ||
| Yeah, super tricky. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You have to dance a line, and then the studio would probably be like, ooh. | ||
| You'd have to really do it independently, probably. | ||
| Probably. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, if you wanted to try to make... | ||
| I mean, the thing about these comedies, it's not like you're endorsing this behavior. | ||
| You're just saying that it's funny because people are fucked up. | ||
| And it's right. | ||
| You're reflecting the people and how they talked and what they did. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And you're showing people's flawed reactions to situations or flawed decision making. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And that's where the comedy is like, don't do that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh my God. | |
| Right. | ||
| You know, and that's, you don't. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Today, that stuff, it's like, what was the last good comedy movie that was released? | ||
| It used to be you would be able to, something about Mary. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know, Kingpin. | ||
| You could just snap them off. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| You knew where they were. | ||
| It's like, wokeness killed the comedy movie in a lot of ways. | ||
| It did. | ||
| People, they're just not making them. | ||
| What was the last great comedy movie? | ||
| The last Step Brothers? | ||
| No, there's been some other ones. | ||
| Since then? | ||
| What was the one where it was the end of the world? | ||
| It was James Franco and Seth Rogen and the fucking volcanoes and shit was happening. | ||
| What's the one where the house party goes out of control? | ||
| This is the end. | ||
| This is the end. | ||
| This is the end was good. | ||
| What year was that? | ||
| 2013. 2013. I wouldn't say great comedy. | ||
| But that's still 10 years ago. | ||
| You know, that might be the last of the Mohicans. | ||
| Yeah, it's weird. | ||
| What was the one where the house party goes out of control? | ||
| Project X. Project X. Do woke people make comedy? | ||
| Is there a woke comedy movie? | ||
| Is there even an attempt? | ||
| Is there even an attempt at a politically correct comedy movie? | ||
| Did it just stop making comedy movies? | ||
| They just stop making them. | ||
| But you could be super funny. | ||
| You could make a great comedy without being rapey and homophobic. | ||
| But it's not just that. | ||
| It's all abhorrent behavior. | ||
| It's not an endorsement. | ||
| If you have a movie, here's an example of American Psycho. | ||
| American Psycho, you could do that movie today. | ||
| And it wouldn't be an endorsement of a person who's a serial killer. | ||
| It would just be a film about a serial killer. | ||
| About a psycho. | ||
| But there's a weird thing that happens when you're making fun of something. | ||
| When you're making fun of something, somehow or another it's supposedly an endorsement of whatever that activity is, even if it's completely unacceptable. | ||
| Yeah, but it's kind of like, yeah, but it's, the real question is, is that a moment? | ||
| Is this a moment? | ||
| Because I know, like, really young people who think that that whole thing went too far. | ||
| Like, they laugh at shit that's a little more irreverent. | ||
| That doesn't matter. | ||
| What matters is, if you did make that movie, the backlash would be absolutely real. | ||
| People would go crazy. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But that's what they're afraid of. | ||
| They're not afraid of whether or not they'd have a market. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They would definitely have a market. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But how many people would get canceled because of it? | ||
| How many people would get attacked because of it? | ||
| How bad would the studio get protested? | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Well, then it comes down to the math. | ||
| When was the last great comedy movie? | ||
| Where people were roaring in the movie theater and then went to see it. | ||
| And then they told everybody, you gotta go see it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's weird that we can't... | ||
| It's weird that we're struggling. | ||
| I am 100% struggling. | ||
| Jamie, when was the last great comedy movie that you saw? | ||
| You said Good Boys. | ||
| I mean, I just was throwing it out there. | ||
| I would think it wasn't... | ||
| But, like, what is another one? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well... | |
| It's like the genre has been murdered. | ||
| I was trying to think like... | ||
| Let's think Kevin Hart. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Let's think Will Ferrell. | |
| Yeah, there's a few movies like the Jumanji movies sort of like... | ||
| Yeah, but those are family friendly, man. | ||
| Exactly, I know. | ||
| Family friendly. | ||
| They're great. | ||
| Funny. | ||
| Great movies. | ||
| Really funny. | ||
| I love Jumanji. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was great. | |
| It took my kids to see it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It was fun. | ||
| Deadpool had a lot of comedy in it. | ||
| The first Jumanji. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Deadpool. | |
| No, Deadpool. | ||
| Deadpool. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It was like, but that's a superhero movie, so... | ||
| Right, right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Deadpool. | |
| It's not really... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But it wasn't a comedy. | ||
| I know. | ||
| In some sense, I wouldn't consider that really good. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It was a funny superhero movie. | ||
| Get Hard, Kevin Hart, and Will Ferrell. | ||
| I didn't see that. | ||
| You know, like, I'm just trying to think of the funny actors that have been making the stuff, right? | ||
| But they make a lot of family-friendly stuff now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Which you can kind of do still. | ||
| Hangover. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Right? | ||
| And that's why it exploded, because it was an R-rated... | ||
| Same year, though, for Hangover 3, 2013. That was 3. I'm trying to find anything since then, and there's not a lot since 2014, 15, 16. There's a few of those family-friendly comedies that pop up. | ||
| They murdered the comedy movie. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Wasn't that also one of the first ones to go rated R? That was a big deal because it was a top rated R comedy movie. | ||
| Of all time. | ||
| It broke the record. | ||
| Superbad was R too. | ||
| But it wasn't as top rated as the hangover was. | ||
| Hangover exploded. | ||
| Hangover was a spectacular success. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You could make Hangover today. | ||
| Could you though? | ||
| I think so. | ||
| What was in it that you couldn't do? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'd have to go back and watch it. | ||
| Sometimes I forget how crazy those movies are to go back and watch them again. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think you can make Hangover today. | ||
| You can make it, but I think people are scared. | ||
| I think people are scared. | ||
| The studio's scared. | ||
| Oh, they would go over that script with a fine-toothed comb. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Different parameter. | ||
| Mike Tyson showed back up, remember? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Mike Tyson. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mike Tyson. | |
| That's when Zach blew up. | ||
| It was Phil Collins coming in the air. | ||
| That was fun. | ||
| That was a great movie. | ||
| What else? | ||
| What was the next movie like that? | ||
| That was that big. | ||
| Google. | ||
| The jackass movies. | ||
| I've been looking. | ||
| I'm deep in the highest grossing comedies, the top from the last 20 years, 10 years. | ||
| Even Google can't figure it out. | ||
| For top grossing comedies of the last 10 years, of the 2010s, the top two, that's a count Jumanji. | ||
| The Hangovers are in there. | ||
| Ted. | ||
| Men in Black 3. Both Deadpools. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| 22 Jump Street. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Sequel to 21 Jump Street. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| So that sounds like these are... | ||
| Yeah, Jonah Hill. | ||
| ...to compete and be like, yeah, this is on my list. | ||
| Oh, what was the... | ||
| Well, Wolf of Wall Street, that was kind of a comedy, right? | ||
| Yeah, kind of. | ||
| And didn't Scorsese make that? | ||
| Who made that? | ||
| Do you know what I mean? | ||
| Wasn't it a comedy though? | ||
| Adam McKay. | ||
| It's funny. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's also 2013. Wow. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That was the end. | |
| Maybe the Mayans were right. | ||
| December 21st, 2012. Yeah, and now all that we're watching is human sacrifices. | ||
| December 21st, 2012. Wasn't that what it was? | ||
| Yeah, 21st. | ||
| 21st, 2012. Yeah, that's what they predicted, the end of the long count. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| Yeah, wild. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| Yeah, they'll come back. | ||
| I don't know about that. | ||
| I think they will. | ||
| I don't know about that, because you need a lot of money to make a movie. | ||
| Well, that's the problem, too. | ||
| It's also a film thing. | ||
| I mean, if you talk to people that are just into the business of making movies, even dramas, like the number of films that are made now that are financed by the studios is so small compared to what it was. | ||
| But you have to also think that COVID must have put a giant dent in the movie business because you couldn't go to the movies anymore. | ||
| And it was vulnerable right before that. | ||
| And the DVD market fell out. | ||
| And then COVID. This is like rough time to make those just good middle of, you know. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| 20 million dollar movies. | ||
| It's all superhero giganto movies. | ||
| Or the really small movies that people don't see. | ||
| Where the streamers are starting to put them out. | ||
| Like Adam McKay's Don't Look Up. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| I didn't see that. | ||
| It's good. | ||
| Yeah? | ||
| Yeah, it's good. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And funny. | |
| Well, what's interesting now is the best things that you can watch in terms of the depth of character and the script writing is television shows. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Television shows are amazing now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Like, if you watch Ozark. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Ozark is basically like a... | ||
| I mean, how many episodes are they into now? | ||
| They're on season four. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So it's like, you know, whatever the fuck it is, a 50-hour. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a 50-hour movie. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, it's crazy. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Like, you're watching these people grow up. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You're watching this family. | ||
| Do you watch it? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The new season's insane. | ||
| I haven't seen it. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| And then the new second part of the new season, they're ramping it up for this. | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| Which I think starts in April sometime. | ||
| I think starts in the end of April. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's going to be amazing. | ||
| Well, yeah, that's where it gets made. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Last Stranger Things is going to come out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You can make comedies if you set them in the 80s. | ||
| Right. | ||
| When people were shitty and funny to each other. | ||
| Even then, man. | ||
| Even then. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Good luck. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The comedy has to be in a guy who's like, you have to make fun of someone who's an absolute piece of shit, right? | ||
| And then there's funny in that because it's like there's a villain. | ||
| You can't have funny in a broken lead character. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Yeah, he's got to be an asshole, a socially outcast. | ||
| Because movies, like, they have statements now. | ||
| It's not as simple as just have a funny movie. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let's make one. | ||
| Please. | ||
| That's the last thing you want to do. | ||
| Could you imagine? | ||
| Imagine a fucking time. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| And then if it bombs, you gave up a year and a half of your life. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I just don't have a desire. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, stand-up is fun enough. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It's the most fun. | ||
| I know, it's pure. | ||
| Yeah, it's so fun. | ||
| And so many more laughs out of a stand-up act than a movie? | ||
| I actually just thought of one. | ||
| I'm looking through comedies coming up. | ||
| This seems like it would be a good comedy, potentially. | ||
| This movie that Nicolas Cage is in about himself, sort of? | ||
| Oh yeah, Nick Cage is Nick Cage or something? | ||
| The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent. | ||
| I remember watching the trailer. | ||
| It's like the story is a really rich guy hires Nick Cage to come and be at his birthday party. | ||
| And then he flies him up. | ||
| He's like, hey, Nick, you need a million dollars, right? | ||
| His agent calls him. | ||
| He's like, yeah, I'll take the million dollars. | ||
| What do I got to do? | ||
| Go show up at a party? | ||
| And then a bunch of crazy shit happens. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Gotta love Nick Cage. | ||
| They can still do it. | ||
| Tiffany Haddish is in it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| It can still be done. | ||
| Potentially. | ||
| Potentially, yeah. | ||
| So we'll see. | ||
| Tiffany Hash with a bold move to shave her head, isn't it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Such a bold move. | ||
| She looks good, though. | ||
| Yeah, she does look good. | ||
| She can pull it off. | ||
| She looks really good. | ||
| Tom Papa, tell everybody where you're doing your fucking hee-hees and ha-has. | ||
| I'm touring all over the country. | ||
| The tours, I've been on 16 flights in the last two weeks. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, I've been everywhere. | ||
| I'm cranking it out. | ||
| Go to TomPapa.com. | ||
| You can look it up. | ||
| I've got a big show in Vegas on May 6th at the Wynn. | ||
| Oh, nice. | ||
| I'm going to be at the Borgata. | ||
| Look at all those little spots on the map. | ||
| Look at you, you fucking traveling fool. | ||
| I'm all over. | ||
| I'm touring like crazy. | ||
| Yeah, you are, dude. | ||
| Fargo, North Dakota. | ||
| Are you going anywhere you haven't done before? | ||
| Yeah, this weekend I'm going to be in Great Barrington, Mass in Redding, Pennsylvania. | ||
| I haven't performed there. | ||
| Great Barrington, Massachusetts? | ||
| Yeah, by the Berkshires. | ||
| Where the fuck is that? | ||
| By the Berkshires? | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And then I've got... | ||
| Is that Western Massachusetts? | ||
| Is that what that is? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's like near New York State, right? | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| What's out there? | ||
| Some little theater. | ||
| They found you? | ||
| And they dragged you out there? | ||
| They dragged me and that's where I'm going on Thursday. | ||
| Bro. | ||
| And then down to Redding, Pennsylvania. | ||
| Connecticut. | ||
| You're doing Connecticut, huh? | ||
| And then... | ||
| Big mistake. | ||
| Nashville. | ||
| Yeah, the big one is Vegas. | ||
| I've got a big show in Vegas. | ||
| I just started... | ||
| I did my first one at the Wynn at the Encore Theater. | ||
| I've heard that's an awesome spot. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| I was there, staying there a few months ago and I saw the theater. | ||
| The theater's gorgeous. | ||
| Going back to Cleveland. | ||
| May 6th is the Encore Theater. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| Yeah, I'm cranking out. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| There's a whole bunch of stuff in the fall. | ||
| Just keep on going. | ||
| Paramount, Huntington, New York. | ||
| Hilarities in Cleveland. | ||
| Great Club. | ||
| Breaking Bread Podcast. | ||
| It's all happening, kids. | ||
| It's all happening, motherfuckers. | ||
| We can still make comedies. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Tom Papa. | ||
| So good to see you, Joe. | ||
| I love you, buddy. | ||
| There's an olive loaf in a regular loaf. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| Thank you, my friend. | ||
| See you soon, buddy. | ||
| You're the best. | ||
| Goodbye, ladies and gentlemen. |
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