Jan. 22, 2019 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:58:07
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| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
| Three, two, one, boom. | ||
| And we're live. | ||
| What's happening? | ||
| How are you? | ||
| I am just stoked to be here. | ||
| I'm stoked to have you here, man. | ||
| It's a pleasure to meet you. | ||
| I love your show. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| It's fun. | ||
| It's a fun fucking car show. | ||
| It really is, man. | ||
| It is. | ||
| I tell people I might be the smartest guy in the world and I figured out how to drink beer and play with cars and get paid for it. | ||
| Yeah, but it's a fun show. | ||
| You're not taking yourself too seriously. | ||
| You're having a good time. | ||
| You're buying and selling awesome cars. | ||
| Oh yeah, for sure. | ||
| It was a dream of mine to get it done. | ||
| It took eight years to get it sold, but here we are now. | ||
| Did it really? | ||
| Yeah, I started pitching the show in 2004. We didn't start until 2012. What were you doing before that? | ||
| Before television or before Gas Monkey? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I kind of had two stages in life. | ||
| I was a firefighter, police officer, medic before I was old enough to drink. | ||
| I mean, I'm talking 19 years old, carrying a gun. | ||
| Probably one of the smartest things for them to let me do. | ||
| Damn, you let you have a girl when you were 19? | ||
| I had a badge. | ||
| I was a cop. | ||
| Literally, I was a police officer. | ||
| So by the time I was 20, I was also a firefighter. | ||
| So I did that for a while and then moved into printing and advertising and then sold that and got into this. | ||
| So was it just like something you're always into cars and that's what led you to the show? | ||
| You know... | ||
| How would I tell the story diplomatically? | ||
| Realistically, I was watching the shows that were on TV at the time. | ||
| I've always been a car nut and a motorcycle guy and what have you, and I realized one night that my kids are never in the room watching it, and my wife's not in the room watching it. | ||
| The shows that were on were a little bit too much bravado, and I'm a tough guy. | ||
| So I dug it, and all my buddies dug it, but the wives and stuff. | ||
| And I was like, golly, they're missing a big chunk of the market here. | ||
| If you could tone down that part of it a little bit and still have a cool brand and still be a cool guy and get the moms and the kids in the room. | ||
| Hopefully it's a lot more successful. | ||
| And so that's that was kind of where the idea came from and I just went out and started it. | ||
| That's interesting. | ||
| So the marketing side of you kicked in. | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| So the marketing side of you went, uh, I think there's another way to do this. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, I'm still a tattooed guy with some jewelry, but you know, I got a pit bull. | ||
| I got a poodle on a leash, not a pit bull on a chain. | ||
| Well, the show, it doesn't seem compromised. | ||
| That's what's interesting about it. | ||
| Cause it seems like a kind of a guy's show. | ||
| I never thought about it that way. | ||
| Well, The way I approached it was just like when I was a kid and my dad had a garage, not open for public garage, but he had a place that we kept his car. | ||
| The neighbors would come over and they'd tinker and they'd drink beer and that's what car guys do. | ||
| So we kind of took that approach of that's what Gas Monkey does. | ||
| We just drink some beer and play with some cars and goof around. | ||
| Just like Saturday afternoon, but all week long. | ||
| Did you have any of a background in automobile knowledge? | ||
| Did you know how to fix things? | ||
| Yeah, I've never really been the full fabricator. | ||
| I understand everything and how it works, but I'm probably more of a business guy. | ||
| So I was able to go out and hire good guys to do the fabricating stuff, and we've got a great team. | ||
| But I did have the car knowledge, and I had the eyeball for what was good and keeping up with what was going to be happening. | ||
| Things like that. | ||
| And that's kind of my strong suit is saying, okay, Porsches are fixed to be popular, so we're going to get into 356s or Broncos like the one you drove in or what have you. | ||
| And I keep my eye on the market. | ||
| That's interesting. | ||
| But you still do keep your eye on the market. | ||
| I saw that 68 that you have outside the 68 Chevelle. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| 68? | ||
| Is that what it is? | ||
| 68 Convertible. | ||
| Goddamn, that's a nice car. | ||
| It's probably the best one I've ever seen. | ||
| I mean, from an original standpoint. | ||
| Yeah, it's mint. | ||
| I mean, it's got little scuffs out. | ||
| It's driven, you know, but it's in perfect condition. | ||
| It doesn't have any dents or anything wrong with it. | ||
| It was literally a little old lady from Pasadena. | ||
| I mean, the lady bought it brand new and she passed away a couple years ago and I bought it from her grandson. | ||
| Wow, what a cliche. | ||
| 52,000 original miles and never been wrecked. | ||
| Old lady from Pasadena is a cliche. | ||
| I know, right? | ||
| It was technically Pomona, but you know. | ||
| Same shit. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Yeah, that car. | ||
| I've said this on the show a million times. | ||
| I'm a giant fan of the time period of 1965 to somewhere around 1971, they fell apart. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You still get a 71 Challenger, a 71 Barracuda, still pretty sweet. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| But then you get into like 72, 73. They had to start putting the big bumpers on there with the shocks and everything just got ugly. | ||
| It just fell apart. | ||
| Then you got the gas crunched and then everything got four cylinders and it was a bad time in the late 70s for sure. | ||
| It was a bad time, but it's a good time now. | ||
| It's a really interesting time now for muscle cars. | ||
| The race is so crazy that they're putting out street legal cars you could buy from a dealer with 700 plus horsepower, and almost every dealer has one now. | ||
| Oh yeah, for sure. | ||
| I mean, I've got a demon myself, and that's 808 horsepower. | ||
| It's fucking crazy! | ||
| Now the new GT500 is out, that's going to have over 700 horsepower. | ||
| You know, you have the Camaro, what is it, 1LE, it's the, no. | ||
| What is it, LT1 1LE? No, what the fuck is the name of the... | ||
| It's something like that. | ||
| ZL1 1LE. ZL, yeah, that's it. | ||
| Yeah, ZL1 1LE, which is 650 horsepower, and then the new ZR1 has 750 horsepower. | ||
| They're just preposterous. | ||
| Oh, it's... | ||
| I think it could be a little dangerous, you know, when everybody out there thinking, hey, I can drive a 700 horsepower car because it's completely different than, you know, a normal one. | ||
| Well, did you see the video of the guy from one of the head guys at GM who took it on track, like, one of the first days they were releasing the car and he spun out on the first turn and slammed into the wall? | ||
| Well, I can't say much. | ||
| I wrecked a brand new Hellcat the other day racing at Woodward. | ||
| Did you really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh no. | ||
| I went to Woodward Dream Cruise and they had a little celebrity matchup and I was racing and just lost it and hit the wall. | ||
| Took out the whole side of the car. | ||
| Were you on a track or were you on a strip? | ||
| It was a street track that they had right there on Woodward Avenue. | ||
| So they put up the blocks and you take off. | ||
|
unidentified
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Yikes. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Those Hellcats are beautiful, but they're not that great at cornering. | ||
| It's still a giant car. | ||
| It's a big car. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Mustang and Camaro are going to do better in the corners for sure. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The Hellcat has so much front. | ||
| There's so much out in front. | ||
| I mean, it really does remind you more than any of those other cars, though, of those 1970 cars. | ||
| It really has that shape. | ||
| If you look at a 1969 Camaro, and then you look at a 2019 Camaro, you're like, uh... | ||
| I don't see it. | ||
| That's not the same thing. | ||
| But a Challenger really does look like that old car. | ||
| Well, Tim Kaniscus killed it. | ||
| I mean, that was his whole passion project the whole time he was running Dodge, and he just absolutely nailed it. | ||
| Yeah, no, they did. | ||
| They made a great-looking modern muscle car. | ||
| The other ones are just great-looking cars. | ||
| I mean, they are still muscle cars, but you don't really think about the old days when you see them. | ||
| Nah, they've tried, but they didn't get it as good as Dodge. | ||
| Now, you guys make some fucking great builds, too. | ||
| You know, you guys have done some really sweet custom builds. | ||
| Like, you were telling me outside that the longest you do a build for is 25 days. | ||
| We've got it down to about 25 from 32-ish when we started. | ||
| So when you see a car on the show, if it's a single episode, then we built that car in 25, 26 days. | ||
| That's crazy! | ||
| Start to finish, paint, interior, everything. | ||
| How do you do it so quick? | ||
| A lot of planning and we've learned over seven years now and 130 of them that, you know, We've just got our process in, and the crew that I have at the shop now is unbelievably phenomenal. | ||
| And there's only six guys doing it. | ||
| There's six guys that do it. | ||
| 25 days, we're done. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| But what about, like, if you're going to do a custom suspension or, you know, Art Morrison chassis or something like that? | ||
| It just takes some planning. | ||
| So literally what we do is we build the car three times. | ||
| This is what I tell everybody. | ||
| We'll say, okay, we're going to build this 68 Chevelle. | ||
| And so we decide how we're going to build it and what kind of parts we're going to use, what kind of suspension, wheels, motor. | ||
| We put all that down on paper. | ||
| And then if it works mathematically for the project we want to do, Then I go find the car. | ||
| Then when I find the car, we order every single part. | ||
| And we don't start that car until every single thing that was on that list is in-house, has been checked, and we're ready to go. | ||
| So now all we've got is actual fabrication time and human error, and we're ready to go. | ||
| Still seems like such a short amount of time. | ||
| I mean, all the builds that I've seen take seven months, nine months, a year. | ||
| It's just the shops are set up differently. | ||
| It may be one or two guys, or maybe they've got kind of, you know, assembly programs going on or what have you. | ||
| But we get in there like, you'll love the one we're building right now. | ||
| We're building a 77 International Scout. | ||
| And started with a really nice one. | ||
| Orange, white stripes, plaid interior. | ||
| I mean, the whole ball of wax. | ||
| Whacked the chassis out from under it. | ||
| Put in a full Chris Alston ChassisWorks chassis with only two-wheel drive. | ||
| And it's all 2018 Hellcat 8-speed automatic in it and slammed on the ground. | ||
| But it's still a removable top. | ||
| It's a great California truck. | ||
| I guarantee you that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, wow. | |
| So you lowered it? | ||
| Yeah, we're calling it the Hellscout. | ||
| Wow, that's pretty badass. | ||
| It's going to be a wicked car. | ||
| Yeah, those Hellcat chassis, Jonathan Ward, the same guy who's doing this, who did my Bronco, the Icon, they're doing that with... | ||
| I think it's a Superbird. | ||
| One of those iconic Mopars from the late 60s, early 70s. | ||
| They're doing a full Hellcat chassis and the whole deal with that. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| That'd be wicked. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What company was the first one to really get stupid with these cars? | ||
| I guess it was kind of Corvette with the ZR1 with horsepower figures. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| Corvette stepped out there with the ZR1 and started cranking it up. | ||
| Everybody was kind of in production. | ||
| You had the resurgence of Shelby. | ||
| Yeah, there it is. | ||
| There's Jonathan Ward's. | ||
|
unidentified
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Wow. | |
| Look at that thing. | ||
| That's good looking. | ||
| That is literally like trying to have a block, like a city block on wheels that you take around a corner. | ||
| Look how long that goddamn thing is. | ||
| Yeah, that's going to be a fresh car. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| Badass. | ||
| He does some awesome shit over there, too. | ||
| He's doing one that I don't think he can talk about. | ||
| I think he's keeping it under wraps, but he's got a bunch of cool shit. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| Have you ever been there? | ||
| I have not. | ||
| It's right down the street. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Go visit afterwards. | ||
| We might. | ||
| I don't think I'm going to make my flight. | ||
| When's your flight? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I've got a couple of them on hold. | ||
| Notice I said I've got a couple on hold because I don't think I make enough money for a plane yet. | ||
| I'm going to talk to Disco on that. | ||
| What, like a private plane? | ||
| Is that what you're saying? | ||
| Yeah, I mean, we're all scrambling for something. | ||
| Yeah, that's the ultimate scramble, the private jet money. | ||
| But that is just so much fucking money. | ||
| That seems pretty ridiculous. | ||
| It is a little ridiculous. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But I'd like to have a tricked out one. | ||
| Gas monkey on it. | ||
| Big ol' monkey on the tail. | ||
| With a keg in it somewhere? | ||
| Oh yeah, for sure. | ||
| Now, when you do these shows and you bargain people down and then they watch the show, do people ever get pissed? | ||
| I've had a few. | ||
| And in the first few years, they were just excited, you know, that we were going to be doing something with the car. | ||
| And there's always an element of... | ||
| Of sentiment to it. | ||
| You know, it was their dad's or it was their mom's or grandma's or whatever and they want to see it go to a good home. | ||
| So you got several different kind of people. | ||
| They want you to not do anything or if you're going to fix it up, we want to see it, you know, all kinds of things like that. | ||
| Nowadays, it's a little more harder for me to get a decent deal because of the success of the show. | ||
| And I show up and they're like, oh, you're that guy on TV. No, I didn't say $10,000. | ||
| I said $13,000. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| Well, I would imagine when people see what you sell them for after you fix them up, then they get a little upset. | ||
| Yeah, they can, but they don't understand the amount of work and time and money that we've put into it. | ||
| Most of the cars that we're building on the show now, we're putting at least $100,000 in and sometimes as much as $300,000. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Everything we're building now, when the new season comes out in June, people are going to be amazed because we're building this kind of stuff. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And it's wicked cool. | ||
| Are you doing that in 25 days? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Fuck, man. | ||
| Just put together a good plan and execute it. | ||
| Well, it must be a thing now, because of the show, that people want to get a gas-monkey-built car. | ||
| They do, but... | ||
| How would I say this diplomatically? | ||
| If it weren't for employees, vendors, and customers, business would be great. | ||
| We don't do a lot for the customer until we've built it for ourselves, and then we sell it to them. | ||
| But as far as coming in off the street, we just like building what we want to build, honing our skills, and then we find a buyer. | ||
| Every once in a while, I'll have a guy come in and go, look, this is what I want, but I won't call you. | ||
| I won't come in there with a new steering wheel. | ||
| That's why a lot of times cars do take seven months or a year. | ||
| Because the guy that's having it's built is in there every other weekend going, oh, I don't know, maybe we move this over here and paint it purple. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| I get it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, it does seem like it would be way better to just build it how you like it and then sell it. | ||
| Well, yeah. | ||
| I mean, it's still a business decision. | ||
| I'm trying to build it to where I think it's going to do the most money at the end of the day and stay true with what's going on as far as that particular car and what's going on in the marketplace and technology and what have you. | ||
| And we do get a lot of calls where people come in and go, okay, I want that exact same thing. | ||
| You know, and so we'll build another one. | ||
| Well, sometimes you do buy cars and just sell them without doing anything to it, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's what we call our B stories. | ||
| You know, we'll buy something, bring it in, maybe just put some wheels on it or whatever. | ||
| But usually it's just clean it up, get it run, and sell somebody else the dream because not everybody can afford a fully built car and or they want to do it themselves. | ||
| So we get them a good project. | ||
| Yeah, I don't think people realize how much money is involved in a fully built car. | ||
| Ridiculous. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Have you ever seen those Revology Mustangs? | ||
| I was looking at those last night. | ||
| It's a pretty intensive build. | ||
| Really interesting stuff. | ||
| It's essentially not really a Mustang. | ||
| I mean, it's kind of licensed by Ford. | ||
| It looks exactly like a Mustang and also all Mustang parts. | ||
| But it's got everything new. | ||
| It's just brand new, like a brand new thing. | ||
| SUV, you take the kids to soccer. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Except really fast and fun to drive. | ||
| And 1966, you know, 65, 66, like he's got a GT350. It's not really a 66 GT350. Every part of it, all the fenders, everything, it's all newly fabricated steel. | ||
| We're going to do that this season, too. | ||
| I'm going to build a car. | ||
| Back to original, like a 60. I haven't decided if we're going to do a Mustang or if we're going to do a Camaro. | ||
| Hey, there's this guy's car. | ||
| I mean, come the fuck on. | ||
| That is beautiful. | ||
| Well, we're going to build one that never existed. | ||
| Look how pretty that goddamn thing is. | ||
| He's killing it. | ||
| I want to see what one of those things is like in real life. | ||
| He's even got push-button start. | ||
| It senses when you're near the car, so it'll unlock for you. | ||
| But it seems like it's a super high-quality build, too. | ||
| Look how fucking pretty that is. | ||
| Well, the trick is how much work goes into it. | ||
| Because, yes, they do make these parts aftermarket and what have you. | ||
| But a lot of times, that's not the best stuff in the world. | ||
| So you end up fabricating that and massaging it in and making all the gaps right and what have you. | ||
| So you can't just expect that you're going to buy a... | ||
| Set a new front end, fenders and hood and everything. | ||
| It's going to work out perfect. | ||
| You're going to always have to massage it and get it right. | ||
| Well, I've been paying attention to this guy for a while, and essentially what he's been doing is honing the process over the last few years. | ||
| And he's got a company now that makes... | ||
| I think it's called Dynacorp that makes all the parts. | ||
| They make everything in terms of like the bodies. | ||
| Audi stamps. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And, you know, he's got his whole process down. | ||
| But when you watch him drive the cars, it seems like he's, I mean, it sounds perfect. | ||
| Like everything inside of it seems like completely locked down. | ||
| No squeaks or rattles. | ||
| It's really like a modern car. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| And there's a lot of shops that do an amazing job at doing that stuff. | ||
| That's what I like. | ||
| What I don't like, I mean, I like the way they look. | ||
| If I look at like a 67 GT500, I like the way they look. | ||
| But if you try to hit the brakes on one of those things, or if you try to make a turn with those old tires, everything's fucking that skinny, and the balance is all wonky. | ||
| It's like 1967 car balance. | ||
| We get a lot of that. | ||
| I've built a few cars for contests, and somebody will win. | ||
| And they're like, oh, I won this car. | ||
| And then they're like, this is horrible. | ||
| I'm like, that's because it's a stock 65 Mustang. | ||
| And what have you. | ||
| Because if you don't realize what you're buying, then yeah, it can be a disappointing process. | ||
| Yeah, those old cars, man, I mean, we've come a long way. | ||
| It's pretty amazing. | ||
| If you go back from, you know, a 1970 car to a 2019 car and you drive it and you hit the brakes and you do all the numbers, like stopping 60 to zero and handling. | ||
| I mean, the cars of today are pretty ridiculous. | ||
| It is absolutely amazing, the technology that's out, and the fact that we can use that technology is so much easier. | ||
| I mean, you can build these kind of cars, or anything you dream up, because you can literally do it right here with your, you know, your Google in your pocket. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Okay, I want to do this and this, and what have you. | ||
| So it ends up being, the cars that we're putting out are definitely just like a brand new car. | ||
| Yeah, but it's a really interesting time, too, for Restomods, you know, because so many people are into that now. | ||
| They realize that they like the looks of those old cars, but they're not really into the way they drove. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| Everybody's about comfort and Bluetooth and, you know, all that kind of stuff. | ||
| So I'm not really that way. | ||
| I'm a 32 Ford nut, and I kind of like cars the way that they drive. | ||
| More or less came out. | ||
| I mean, I'm all for maybe some disc brakes or safety or whatever, but I like the squeaking and having to learn how to drive it and figure it out. | ||
| The character of it? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Manual transmissions. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| How much longer before the manuals did... | ||
| I think it's already got the nails in the coffin. | ||
| Seems like it, but then, you know, like American cars, they'll come out with cars like the GT350. You can't even get it with an automatic. | ||
| Fuck off. | ||
| They won't even sell it to you. | ||
| Yeah, and they're going to hold on with that as long as they can, but you know, your big competition cars, Porsche, Ferrari, Lambo, Mercedes, you know, you can't get a manual. | ||
|
unidentified
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Wow. | |
| Wow, everybody wants that Nürburgring time. | ||
| They all want that super fast Nürburgring time. | ||
| And unless you have a double clutch transmission, unless you have paddle shifts, you're going to miss a second here, a second there. | ||
| And then people are going to look at it. | ||
| It's so ridiculous that people look at those times. | ||
| Yeah, because the average show isn't going out there and doing that. | ||
| I mean, modern cars, I mean, like the ZL1 that we were talking about earlier, I think they're down to, the 1LE, I think is down to a 7 minute and real low seconds Nurburgring time, which is fucking crazy. | ||
| That's faster than a GT3 RS from a couple of years ago. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| For a $60,000 car that you could buy at a Chevy dealership. | ||
| Eh, probably closer to 80, but yeah. | ||
| Is it? | ||
| Yeah, I think it's like 78. Okay. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But they're... | ||
| Loaded. | ||
| Phenomenal car. | ||
| I agree that that Corvette and probably the Demon are two cars that are the most bang for the buck. | ||
| I mean, just get in and go. | ||
| The ZL1, or the ZR1, rather, is almost too stupid. | ||
| It's almost too ridiculous. | ||
| It's just like, if you're a regular person... | ||
| And you buy that and you try to take it somewhere. | ||
| For you to understand the limits of the grip, how much gas you can apply, for you to have an educated foot. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| I mean, when they first started making those, what was it, seven or eight years ago, maybe a little longer, I had a client have me getting one. | ||
| He brought it back the next day, scared to death. | ||
| He goes, I just sell it. | ||
| I'll never drive it. | ||
| He goes, that is just stupid. | ||
| Yeah, I saw a picture of one the other day in my Google News feed that someone had bought and wrecked the next day. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Smashed it. | ||
| I was just reading today. | ||
| Somebody sent me a link. | ||
| Did you see the episode where we built the F40? Look at that fucking car. | ||
| It's fucking wicked. | ||
|
unidentified
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Good lord. | |
| I'm doing something with that right now that I can't... | ||
| I guess I can. | ||
| Imagine everything you see there, the styling, the carbon fiber points, the lift in the front, everything, the wing, all of it. | ||
| But we're doing it with a 72 Riviera Boattail. | ||
| What? | ||
| Yeah, it's gonna be frickin' sick. | ||
| We've already chopped the top and brought it down so that it doesn't have that clam mouth and looking, you know, windshield. | ||
| And so we're taking all of a bunch of our styling cues and definitely all of our driving components ideology and we're cramming it into a 72 Rivie. | ||
| How does that fit? | ||
|
unidentified
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Huh? | |
| How's that going to fit? | ||
| Well, we're not taking the chassis and putting it over there. | ||
| We're making our own. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And we've worked with Chris Austin on it also for the rear. | ||
| But you're using that transmission, that engine. | ||
| Independent suspension. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| Independent rear. | ||
| I got a video here if I can find it. | ||
| Isn't a 72 Riviera like a million pounds? | ||
| How much does the thing weigh? | ||
| It's a lot, but we're clearing all of that out. | ||
| We're working with Speed Corps, and we're doing a lot of... | ||
| The top's going to be carbon fiber, and so will the hood, the trunk, and maybe even the full front clip. | ||
| Speed Corps did a nasty 1970 Mustang for Robert Downey Jr. that I just saw online the other day. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| With a supercharged Coyote engine in it. | ||
| Like a weird color, too. | ||
| Like a beige. | ||
| Like a weird kind of yellowish, funky color. | ||
| See, I like the funky colors. | ||
| Do you? | ||
| The crazier the better, yeah. | ||
| I just love it. | ||
| Our car is going to be like a weird muted gray with red and chrome and carbon. | ||
| I mean, we're getting pretty crazy with it. | ||
| We're about halfway through. | ||
| So it's a 72? | ||
| Boattail Riviera. | ||
| See if you can find one of those. | ||
| I'm trying to picture that. | ||
| I had a Riviera when I was in high school. | ||
| No, I didn't. | ||
| I had a Skylark. | ||
| So yeah, here you go. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| That's a stock one, but then it'll turn into what we're building. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| We just started chaining. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So that's a... | ||
| You know, a few people have built them into hot rods, but... | ||
| Wow. | ||
| If you stay on that video, it'll just feed to what it's going to look like when it's done. | ||
| Oh, I see what you did. | ||
| So you have... | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| That is crazy. | ||
| It's going to be nuts. | ||
| It'll probably be at SEMA this year in bare metal. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| That's a beautiful car. | ||
| Don't have wagon wheels on it like that stupid thing, though. | ||
| Yeah, I'm not a fan of those. | ||
| That was a thing for a while. | ||
| That's going to be pretty fucking rad. | ||
| That's pretty badass. | ||
| Yeah, you don't see those. | ||
| You never see that car. | ||
| That's a rare car. | ||
| No, we found a one owner with zero hit, zero rust. | ||
| I mean, the metal orange is perfect. | ||
| What are those Australian cars that were in Mad Max? | ||
| It's finished now. | ||
| Ooh, damn. | ||
| That is going to look pretty nasty. | ||
| It's going to be slammed like that? | ||
| And it's going to be nasty, too. | ||
| We're aiming for around 1,300 horsepower. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What?! | |
| We're building that one just for sheer shits and giggles and for fun, because nobody does that. | ||
| Well, somebody's gonna want it, for sure. | ||
| I hope they have a lot of money, because that's like a money pit right now. | ||
| Yeah, how much does something like that cost to build? | ||
| 350. Wow. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| To build. | ||
| And then how much would you like to make? | ||
| Well, you want to try to... | ||
| I always try to make at least 20%. | ||
| I mean, it's kind of my goal. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But... | ||
| That's reasonable. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Especially considering all the creative time and putting it together and... | ||
| Yeah, we do everything in-house. | ||
| I mean, it's... | ||
| Except for interior, we're doing every single thing in-house now. | ||
| I mean, we've come a long way since the beginning. | ||
| And when you have that kind of horsepower, what kind of rubber are you going to have on that thing? | ||
| Oh, it'll have 15 inches on each side. | ||
| I think we went with 24s and 22s and super, super wide. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Yeah, you kind of have to, right? | ||
| And even then, it's probably going to spin out everywhere. | ||
| No, because we're using all the technology. | ||
| We're using the independent suspension. | ||
| We're using all the sensors, all the stuff that's in that brand new Vette. | ||
| So you can use traction control as well? | ||
|
unidentified
|
All of it. | |
| Wow. | ||
| How do you adapt that over to an old car like that? | ||
| You just go through the systems. | ||
| We've got a guy working for us now that helped us run our standalone Hellcat. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| And so he just gets the whole thing and starts eliminating sensors or adding or, you know, and we end up with all the same technology. | ||
| So the sensors understand when a wheel's spinning. | ||
| And then they compensate with brakes or... | ||
| Horsepower, brakes, get your stupid light. | ||
| You can't do that. | ||
| So we'll be able to turn it all on and off just like a brand new car. | ||
| Oh, so will you have different modes, like a race mode, street mode, like that one? | ||
| Yeah, but what a lot of people... | ||
| What I try to do that I can't stand is they'll take something with that idea and they'll go, okay, I'm just going to pull the body off and cram this under there and weld it together and hope it works. | ||
| And we make everything adapt to the old car and still work, though, the way it's supposed to in a brand new car. | ||
| Yeah, I've seen, you know, there's a guy online that has, on Instagram, GT500 Super Swap. | ||
| He took an old GT500 body and put it on a GT500 from a modern chassis and piece it together like that. | ||
| But I was always thinking with a setup like that, you probably can't have airbags, right? | ||
| You can. | ||
| There's actually ways to add it into there. | ||
| But you get into the... | ||
| There it is. | ||
| Yeah, you get into the geometry and the direction of the airbag. | ||
| Look how beautiful that looks, though. | ||
| Yeah, but you don't want to play with the R&D of trying to put an airbag into something like that unless you really, really know what you're doing because a fraction of an inch off of being where it needs to be, that airbag could do more damage than good. | ||
| It's weird, though, because you're dealing with a totally different size body, too. | ||
| So I wonder how he's doing this. | ||
| It's easy. | ||
| It doesn't sound easy, but it is. | ||
| Is it really? | ||
| Have you done that before? | ||
| We haven't, but I understand the process. | ||
| And really, it's just cut, massage, move in, move out. | ||
| There's a company called Mag Motors. | ||
| Have you ever heard of them? | ||
| I don't think I have. | ||
| Go to magmotors.com. | ||
| What they're doing is they're putting a carbon fiber body on a modern GT500, but they're using a 67 Eleanor body, but they're making it out of carbon fiber. | ||
| So that one's gross. | ||
| Go to the silver one. | ||
| That white one looks disgusting. | ||
| I just hate the Eleanor bodies. | ||
| Do you really? | ||
| They're so overplayed. | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| It's just been done so many times. | ||
| But who cares? | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| Yeah, those are the images. | ||
| But get it from the side so you get a better look at it. | ||
| That's a fucking beautiful car. | ||
| See, to me, it sits weird. | ||
| It looks like it sits a little too high, and it looks like they're worried. | ||
| I don't know anything about them, but to me, looking at it, it's like you need to get it down a little bit, get a little more attitude, get a deeper dish on the wheel. | ||
| Well, I think what they're doing is trying to use all the geometry of the modern car. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| So you end up with something that looks like it could go four-wheeling. | ||
| A little bit, right? | ||
| Yeah, it's definitely not slammed. | ||
| Yeah, in terms of looks, right? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I mean, I'm sure the car runs and drives and performs unbelievably, but to me, it's missing a little something. | ||
| You know that company, Classic Recreations? | ||
| Have you seen them? | ||
| No, I don't think so. | ||
| They're doing similar cars like that, too, but they're doing it from the ground up. | ||
| There's a lot of people doing it because it's... | ||
| With technology coming the way that it has, it's not as hard to do as it used to be. | ||
| It's still a laborious task, don't get me wrong, but you can make all those systems work in anything. | ||
| See, a guy like you that's a car guy, you look at an Eleanor and you look at it like it's played. | ||
| But a person who doesn't see them all the time, who's not in the car industry, when was the last time you saw one of those fucking things on the street? | ||
| Shit, I was never seeing one. | ||
| There was like five of them for sale. | ||
| That's the thing. | ||
| If you go there. | ||
| But like, Fusion Motorsports, they're right down the street here. | ||
| They're the only licensed dealers. | ||
| They have some deal with the woman who was the wife of the guy who wrote Gone in 60 Seconds or produced or something like that. | ||
| So they make... | ||
| See, go to Fusion Eleanor. | ||
| They make some pretty sick ones. | ||
| But you think there's a played out? | ||
| Personally, yeah. | ||
| I'm just not an Eleanor Carr fan. | ||
| That is fucking beautiful. | ||
| Why do you hate America, Richard? | ||
| I don't hate America. | ||
| How could you not love that? | ||
| It's just, there's hundreds if not thousands of them out there. | ||
| Come on, bro. | ||
| You must hate America. | ||
| No way, man. | ||
| Secretly. | ||
| And I love the Mustangs. | ||
| I've got three of them myself, including a real 68 Shelby. | ||
| Is it the shape or the color scheme? | ||
| I think it's the shape. | ||
| I mean, to me, it's... | ||
| It's such a popular car in the movie that, you know... | ||
| Too many people did it. | ||
| And now everybody's doing it, and it's what have you. | ||
| Yeah, but I mean, how many of them are out there in comparison to, say, a modern ZR1? There's probably not nearly as many of those out there. | ||
| I bet you there's thousands of those out there. | ||
| You think so? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, there's different companies making tons of them. | ||
| All car people say that. | ||
| They say two cars they think are played out. | ||
| 69 Camaros and these things. | ||
| Like, everybody does a 69 Camaro and everybody does an Eleanor. | ||
| Yeah, and the Duke's Hazard car. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Same thing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Now, a badass 69 Charger, don't get me wrong, but painted orange with a flag on the top. | ||
| It's played out. | ||
| You can't do that anymore. | ||
| That flag is fucking persona non grata. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, that is. | |
| For sure. | ||
| You believe they pulled that show off the air? | ||
| Did they? | ||
| Yes, because of the flag. | ||
| That shows off the air. | ||
| I thought it showed on some weird, obscure cable channel. | ||
| They pulled it off of TV Land. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Yep, TV Land. | ||
| I wrote a whole thing about it on Instagram, how ridiculous it was. | ||
| Yeah, I don't know if I agree with that. | ||
| I mean, it's like trying to erase it. | ||
| History or whatever. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, you live in Dallas, though. | ||
| It's a little easier to get by with a Confederate flag in Dallas. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| We don't have a bunch of matcha chi drinkers and what have you like we do out here in California. | ||
| Matcha? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Freaking... | ||
| Living in Dallas, I have to do my business with the people out here in LA, and I'm getting off work before they've had their two chai lattes and walked their dog and showed up to the office. | ||
| I'm like, come on, guys. | ||
| Get up and get to work. | ||
| Then I get accused of, like, have you been drinking? | ||
| I'm like, yeah, it's 7.30 in the night here. | ||
| I've been off for two and a half hours. | ||
| People get upset at you if you've been drinking? | ||
| Well, no, when I'm trying to conduct some of the business calls that we do in the evenings because they haven't gotten to work yet. | ||
| And they ask you if you've actually been drinking? | ||
| Sometimes. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Is it because they know you from the show? | ||
| Well, I'm talking about my agents and managers and networks and whatever. | ||
| I'm like, yeah, because I've been off since 5 o'clock, guys. | ||
| Most people have a couple beers and sit around the shop. | ||
| Well, most people there, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, it's a different world out here. | ||
| It's a little bit of a culture shock. | ||
| It is. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I mean, I like it. | ||
| It's okay. | ||
| But I think if I was going to move Gas Monkey anywhere, it would probably be Scottsdale. | ||
| Scottsdale's nice. | ||
| It's freaking cool. | ||
| It's about a million degrees in the summer, though. | ||
| You ever go there? | ||
| Yeah, but it's a dry heat. | ||
| So's the sauna. | ||
| It's fucking preposterous. | ||
| I was in Phoenix last July, and we went outside. | ||
| We just stood there for a second going, this is ridiculous. | ||
| We should get used to this, because this is what global warming is going to be like in L.A. in just a few years. | ||
| Yeah, you guys are going to either be on fire from the volcanoes or global warming or whatever, or sliding into the ocean. | ||
| But I really like Scottsdale. | ||
| Fun fact. | ||
| Next week, they have me playing in the Scottsdale Open, in the Waste Management Open, there in the Celebrity Pro-Am. | ||
| Oh yeah? | ||
| Do you golf? | ||
| I absolutely suck at it. | ||
| Do you? | ||
| Like, horribly. | ||
| I've been a member of the same country club for about 19 years, and I've probably played about 50 rounds of golf in my life, and they've got me playing in the Pro-Am, the Celebrity thing, and I'm like, well, whoever gets teamed up with me... | ||
| That's in big trouble. | ||
| Are you going to tighten up before you go? | ||
| Are you going to take some lessons or anything? | ||
| No way, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm swinging. | |
| Because the way I look at it is, all I'm going to do then is be pissed off that I can't do what the guy told me to do. | ||
| Right, so it's going to get much better. | ||
| And then it's like what I tell him on top of that is I'm like, okay, you think you're so good at golf because you can shoot 72 or whatever. | ||
| Well, mathematically, this is an 18-shot game. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You can figure it out mathematically. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, if you had some insane ability. | ||
| Well, yeah, but you don't have to have insane ability to figure out the mathematics of it. | ||
| It's an 18-shot game, guys. | ||
| Yeah, but no one's ever done that. | ||
| So how is it an 18-shot game? | ||
| Just mathematically. | ||
| That's like saying every fight is a one-punch fight. | ||
| Well, no. | ||
| It's more like saying that, because more fights are one-punch fights than ever a golf game is an 18-shot golf game. | ||
| I'm saying mathematically. | ||
| Propulsion, direction, etc. | ||
| and so forth. | ||
| You can get that ball from that spot to that hole every time. | ||
| It's possible with enough power. | ||
| Spin, what have you. | ||
| But that's literally like saying every fight is a one-shot fight. | ||
| No way. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why? | |
| Because a lot of fights are one-shot fights, but there's never been an 18-hole game that's played with 18 shots. | ||
| But there are hole-in-ones, so all you need is 18 of them together. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's never been 18 of them. | |
| It's never happened in the history of the human race. | ||
| I think the most they've ever done in an actual real tournament is two. | ||
| Someone's done two? | ||
| I think somebody did. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| I'd have to look it up. | ||
| But yeah, so one shot fight. | ||
| That'd probably be you fighting me. | ||
| You just hit me and I'd go down. | ||
| There's been quite a few that I've called. | ||
| One punch in the beginning of the fight. | ||
| Bam! | ||
| Someone gets hit and they go down. | ||
| At least three or four in the history of the fight. | ||
| Dwayne Ludwig, like six seconds. | ||
| First punch he threw. | ||
| That'd probably be me. | ||
| We already talked about working out, so I'd go down pretty quick. | ||
| I can't believe you've never worked out ever in your life. | ||
| I really haven't. | ||
| And you're thinking about starting. | ||
| More like just cardio and stuff. | ||
| I've turned 50 in two months, so I'm starting to feel it. | ||
| You know, I am a little bit. | ||
| It's a weird number, right? | ||
| It's a weird number, plus I look at my dad, and he's 23 years older than me, and I'm like, God, I've got 20 years left. | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| Yeah, well, working now definitely holds off the Grim Reaper a little bit. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| It keeps your body working better, but it takes effort. | ||
| You gotta be willing to do it. | ||
| Well, like I said, I just hope things work out. | ||
| Just hire a hot trainer. | ||
| Hire a chick that's gonna, you'll be motivated. | ||
| Or embarrassed. | ||
| Both. | ||
| You'll be embarrassed and that will get you motivated. | ||
| Yeah, this chick's like looking at me going, what is wrong with you? | ||
| What kind of man are you? | ||
| What kind of man? | ||
| Yeah, that is some embarrassing shit when a chick can lift more than you. | ||
| Yeah, well, I'm sure there's a lot of them. | ||
| Oh, there's a lot of them. | ||
| There's a lot of them around the block. | ||
| Yeah, well... | ||
| Right around the corner is a giant fucking bodybuilding gym. | ||
| For chicks? | ||
| For guys. | ||
| For everybody. | ||
| I mean, it's just savages. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I like an athletic build on a girl, but I don't know if I want her to have giant muscles and... | ||
| Yeah, there's a point of no return. | ||
| I don't want her to take bigger crunches than me. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| There's a point where it gets creepy. | ||
| There's like a... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Roll over. | ||
| I'm holding her from behind, a little spoon, and I'm like, oh, is that you, Joe? | ||
| Yeah, like veins, right? | ||
| Like veiny forearms on chicks. | ||
| Like something about like veiny chest, like a girl with a veiny pecs. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| No, it didn't work. | ||
| It's a mistake. | ||
| They're not supposed to have pecs anyway. | ||
| They're supposed to have boobs. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But they have boobs combined with pecs. | ||
| That's where it gets real weird when they have fake boobs, but they also have pec muscles. | ||
| Oh, and you can feel the muscles underneath the fake boob? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| He's like this water balloon that's floating on top of his sinew. | ||
| Yeah, they just get a little too crazy. | ||
| Now, that's one thing I do like about California here. | ||
| You know, the Southern California little blonde with all the tattoos and, you know, her little bikini on the beach and what have you. | ||
| They got those in Texas, though. | ||
| Eh, not as many. | ||
| They don't? | ||
| Yeah, we got them, but not as many. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Maybe I'm on Instagram too much. | ||
| It seems like every girl from Texas on Instagram has tattoos all over the place. | ||
| Yeah, but that's, you know, there's 20 of them, not hundreds of them. | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| Yeah, out here there's thousands. | ||
| They're everywhere. | ||
| Go to, like, Venice Beach. | ||
| It's hard to find a girl who doesn't have a tattoo. | ||
| That's unique these days. | ||
| That's a real rebel. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| A girl with no piercings and no tattoos. | ||
| It's either rebel or boring. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Probably both. | ||
| She's rebelling against being exciting. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I think the girl bodybuilder, though, what happens is people get into something and they forget how weird it is for everybody else. | ||
| So as they get deeper and deeper into it, they just want to excel at it. | ||
| They want to lift more weights. | ||
| They're trying to put more on the squat rack. | ||
| They're deadlifting. | ||
| Their neck gets big. | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| And I had a girl that worked for me for a long time that was real into it. | ||
| She was like this, I don't know what competition she does, but it was body sculpting and stuff. | ||
| And this girl's over there measuring florets of broccoli on a scale. | ||
| Oh, that's when they fucked up. | ||
| You want another one? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa! | |
| Oops. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Once they start measuring their food and counting their macros, like settle down. | ||
| Unless you're in some gigantic competition. | ||
| Cheers. | ||
| Cheers, sir. | ||
| Hell yeah. | ||
| I'll fix and break out some tequila for you in a minute. | ||
| Break it out, man. | ||
| We have cups? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| You brought cups, too? | ||
| Unless this guy comes prepared. | ||
| Oh, you have gas monkey tequila? | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| You got your own tequila? | ||
| Dude, can I get a gas monkey t-shirt? | ||
| Do you have one? | ||
| I brought you one. | ||
| I fucking love that logo. | ||
| I got some of this crap down here. | ||
| Dude, I'll put one on right now. | ||
| I don't give a fuck. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Woo! | |
| Got a couple of them here. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| Look at that, Jamie, huh? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ellis. | |
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| Dude, that is cool. | ||
| Yeah, you guys have, like, the whole apparel line. | ||
| Dude, we have everything. | ||
| I mean, we've got tools. | ||
| We've got... | ||
| I saw a bath mat the other day at, like, Home Goods or something, and I'm like, I don't even remember approving that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Is it for sure yours? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's a licensed product. | |
| Well, that's part of the thing, right? | ||
| You guys came up with a cool logo. | ||
| Yeah, and the monkey's, you know, he's that lovable character that's also a pain in the ass and kind of in there messing stuff up all the time, but you can't shoot him because he's just... | ||
| That's what he does. | ||
| He's a monkey. | ||
| And what have you. | ||
| So we did the gas monkey cinnamon tequila. | ||
| This is... | ||
| It's cinnamon? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's 100% blue agave just swirled with a little bit of cinnamon. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| My kid's got a soccer game after this. | ||
| I'm going to be fucked up. | ||
| Good times. | ||
| Well, it's a good way to get through the game. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| That's actually good. | ||
| It's good stuff. | ||
| Don't tell Ron White, but I think your tequila's better. | ||
| He'll get mad. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| He can't hear this. | ||
| He'll get mad at me. | ||
| He loves his tequila. | ||
| We came up with this because the only tequila you ever find is made in America. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Because you have to do Jalisco, you know, real blue agave tequila is always Echua Mexico from Jalisco. | ||
| To get around that, I ship it in, in tankers, and then I do it here. | ||
| So we're switching our distillers right now, and we'll be made in Texas. | ||
| So you can't grow it in America? | ||
| You can't grow the agave in America? | ||
| You could, but a real tequila, just like champagne in France, you know, real tequila is always from Jalisco area and what have you. | ||
| How weird is that? | ||
| It's like Burgundy, right? | ||
| Burgundy is from... | ||
| Or Bordeaux. | ||
| Bordeaux, exactly. | ||
| A certain part of France. | ||
| That's funny. | ||
| I guess I kind of knew that. | ||
| I didn't think about that. | ||
| That's weird. | ||
| Whiskey can make anywhere. | ||
| We're literally sold out right now worldwide. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I took it to the troops. | ||
| We went and did a deal with the PX exchanges on all the bases in the world, and they wiped me out. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And so we're having to make it right now. | ||
| We're completely sold out everywhere. | ||
| That's fucking great. | ||
| I had to borrow a couple of bottles from somebody that was hoarding them. | ||
| That is a fucking dope logo, though. | ||
| That monkey with the tongue hanging out. | ||
| Now, you have that on the outside of your garage. | ||
| Do you get a bunch of looky-loos and find out where you guys are? | ||
| Oh, we do it on purpose. | ||
| We've got a little spot where people can come by and see the cars. | ||
| We've got a building there, and then we've got a merch shop. | ||
| And inside the merch shop, you can go in the back, and there's like a party area where you can have a... | ||
| I don't sell beer or alcohol, but you can have a gas monkey energy drink or water and kind of feel like you're in the experience. | ||
| Wow, so you let people just come on down and say hi. | ||
| I really do. | ||
| Everybody can come by. | ||
| We're on Earthcam right now. | ||
| Pull up Earthcam, Gas Monkey. | ||
| We can see how many people are there. | ||
| Do you get stalked by weirdos because of the TV show? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| You know what really freaking sucks in Texas? | ||
| This is no bullshit. | ||
| I didn't find this out until we got stalked. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| Live cam. | ||
| What really sucks? | ||
| Somebody comes on my property and they're weird. | ||
| And I gotta tell them to leave. | ||
| Or they're aggressive or whatever. | ||
| And I go, get the hell off the property. | ||
| Get out of here. | ||
| Beat it. | ||
| For the next 24 hours, I'm responsible for them. | ||
| If they leave and get run over at the corner or whatever because I made them leave, I forced them from the property, they're my responsibility. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| It fucking sucks. | ||
| So if a guy shows up drunk and you say, hey man, you gotta get the fuck out of here, and the guy leaves and gets in a car accident... | ||
| He could say, hey, they made me leave. | ||
| What? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, so the drunk ones, I'll put them in an Uber, but I'm talking about just the crazy ones. | ||
| You know, we've got a homeless problem in Dallas. | ||
| It's starting to get to be about as big as you guys are having here. | ||
| And they'll wander on your property and we're like, hey, you got to beat it. | ||
| And then if they go down the street and get hit... | ||
| Yeah, I'm responsible. | ||
| Then you're responsible for their medical bills? | ||
| Can be. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| It's the stupidest freaking law on the planet. | ||
| Is that like a hospitality law? | ||
| Is it because you're a business? | ||
| I don't know because I don't sell alcohol, but it's because I'm a business and I made them leave. | ||
| They came to see me and I made them leave. | ||
| They didn't leave on their own accord. | ||
| So we have to call the cops to get them to carry those people out. | ||
| That's so weird. | ||
| I went to Jay Leno's garage, and he's telling me that, you know, Jay Leno's garage is not Jay Leno's garage. | ||
| It's Jay Leno's 11 garages. | ||
| Oh, I know. | ||
| I've been there. | ||
| I've done the Jay Leno show. | ||
| It's freaking crazy. | ||
| I mean, I knew that guy was a car nut, but I didn't know the magnitude until you go and you see these 11 warehouse buildings. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Just full. | |
| Full cars. | ||
| He's got a real problem. | ||
| No, he's got a great problem. | ||
| He's got a great problem. | ||
| I'm only up to two buildings. | ||
| I need to start adding buildings. | ||
| How many cars do you personally own? | ||
| It's hard to answer because I own Gas Monkey and so we have inventory. | ||
| I tell everybody I usually keep between 50 and 60 cars. | ||
| That are yours? | ||
| That are sort of for sale. | ||
| Someone comes along and goes, man, I need that car. | ||
| You're like, what? | ||
| But there's about 10 that I won't sell, period. | ||
| What won't you sell? | ||
| I won't sell my Thomas Crown Affair Mustang, my Shelby. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| What year? | ||
| 68. You can probably find a picture of that on the net, but it's a remake of the one they used in Thomas Crown Affair with Pierce Bronson when he's on the island. | ||
| I never saw that movie. | ||
| It's all lifted. | ||
| I don't think I've never seen a Pierce Bronson movie. | ||
| Oh, dude. | ||
| Thomas Crown Affair is a remake of another Thomas Crown Affair movie, and the Mustang's just wicked cool. | ||
| So I had a client, a friend of mine had me build it for him, good friend, and I wanted the car. | ||
| Of course, I couldn't afford it then. | ||
| We didn't even have the TV show yet. | ||
| And so I built him this perfect rendition, 68 Shelby convertible Mustang, put BF Goodrich's on it, raised it all up high. | ||
| I mean, it's a perfect California cruiser. | ||
| And then when I got the show... | ||
| I call him up and I go, hey, can I borrow the car, buddy? | ||
| Because I want stuff sitting around the shop that I built. | ||
| I don't want other people's stuff here. | ||
| He goes, oh yeah, man, just send the truck down to pick it up. | ||
| This is three years later. | ||
| I send the truck down. | ||
| It gets back. | ||
| The car's got 42 miles on it. | ||
| It's been sitting there doing nothing in his garage. | ||
| He's down in New Orleans, so it's got some of that haze and shit from the salt air. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| The gas is bad. | ||
| Wow, that is really hot. | ||
| It looks like you're going four-wheeling in that fucking thing. | ||
| What is going on with the tire on the trunk? | ||
| That's the spare. | ||
| I know, but that's... | ||
| An odd placement. | ||
| That's just how it was in the movie. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Golly, am I fat there or what? | ||
| Is that you? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| No, that's not the one I built. | ||
| That's not you, bro. | ||
| That's another guy's car. | ||
| Some fucking asshole. | ||
| And it's just not quite right. | ||
| Mine is more absolutely perfect to the movie. | ||
| That's somebody else's rendition of it. | ||
| But anyways, I call my buddy. | ||
| I go, let me borrow the car, etc. | ||
| Gets there with 42 miles on it after three years. | ||
| It doesn't run. | ||
| The gas is bad. | ||
| Carburetor's all fucked off. | ||
| And of course, I call him up and go, you're a really shitty car owner. | ||
| I said, this thing is freaking badass and look what you've done to it. | ||
| Well, he has a considerable amount of money. | ||
| So the next day, the title shows up in the mail and he goes, you're right. | ||
| I'm a shitty car owner. | ||
| It's yours. | ||
| He just gave it to you? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| It helps to have close friends that have a lot of cash. | ||
| Well, you must obviously like you, too. | ||
| Nah, we're real good friends. | ||
| He's a bad motherfucker. | ||
| Well, I want to see what it actually looks like without the fat guy driving. | ||
| No disrespect, fat guy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Looking at it, because I can see where... | ||
| If you don't work out at all, how do you stay thin? | ||
| Because you're a thin guy. | ||
| I guess it's just metabolism. | ||
| I do eat right. | ||
| I don't eat fast food. | ||
| But you drink. | ||
| I don't do sodas. | ||
| I haven't done sodas or anything like that in two decades. | ||
| But how often do you drink? | ||
| Every day. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Every day. | |
| Doesn't that cancel out all the no sodas? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I mean, maybe it's because it doesn't have as much sugar. | ||
| I think you must have a beer drinker's metabolism. | ||
| You just know how to do it. | ||
| Yeah, it takes a lot of practice to get it to this point. | ||
| Your body's ready. | ||
| I'm ready for anything. | ||
| Everybody knows what the fuck to do. | ||
| It's like a marathon runner. | ||
| Everybody can't run fucking 15 miles a day, but someone who runs 15 miles a day can do it. | ||
| Yeah, that's one thing that's just monotonous to me running. | ||
| My wife's a runner, and I'm like, that's just silly. | ||
| Why do you want to get out and go run 20 miles? | ||
| I don't run 20 miles, but I run hills. | ||
| I run four. | ||
| Four is the most I run, but I run pretty steep hills. | ||
| There's your car. | ||
| Is that it? | ||
| That's the same fat guy right there, Jamie. | ||
| There's a couple versions of it, and a lot of the websites are pulling both pictures. | ||
| Drop down to the one right below that where your cursor is. | ||
| That one right there, that's the real one. | ||
| That one right there? | ||
| Yeah, that's the real one. | ||
| That's the real one, yeah. | ||
| This is a nice car. | ||
| It's so much fun. | ||
| I've got a banging, stupid sound system in it, so, you know. | ||
| Roll bar, the whole deal. | ||
| It'd be a great car to cruise around in California. | ||
| What kind of engines you put in that thing? | ||
| Just the typical small block. | ||
| It's a GT350, so it's got a small block 302 and what have you. | ||
| It's a pretty fun time. | ||
| It gets a lot of heads. | ||
| And then we were talking about cars I wouldn't sell. | ||
| I got that. | ||
| I got a 52 Fleetline. | ||
| That was the first car we ever built as Gas Monkey Garage. | ||
| What is a Fleetline? | ||
| I don't even know what that is. | ||
| You can type in 52 Fleetline Gas Monkey. | ||
| It's the fastback version of a 52 Chevy. | ||
| It kind of has the slope back. | ||
| Some people call it a torpedo back. | ||
| Look at that thing. | ||
| Yeah, not that one. | ||
| The picture on the far corner. | ||
| Yeah, that's us. | ||
| And it's all patinated out and kind of, you know... | ||
| Oh, so you kept it like that? | ||
| Yeah, that was the original body. | ||
| We chopped it, though, and it's got... | ||
| Wow, people love that. | ||
| Like, the original patinated out body. | ||
| Like, Icon does that. | ||
| They call them derelicts. | ||
| That's a good picture of the car, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah, derelicts. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And then we got, what else do we have? | ||
| I got my first Ferrari I ever bought. | ||
| I won't sell that, as far as the first one I ever bought for me. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| 599 GTV 2009. Oh, that's a nice car. | ||
| Super good car. | ||
| And, you know, then... | ||
| I had a couple other Ferraris, but I'd probably sell those. | ||
| But that one, first one, I just probably never will. | ||
| Just because it's like a benchmark? | ||
| I'm a big proponent and believer in forcing yourself. | ||
| Forcing yourself? | ||
| To want more, to do more, to give yourself motivation. | ||
| A lot of people just save and save and save. | ||
| And I'm more like, okay, I'm going to do something that I probably shouldn't do right now so that I know I got to work hard to make sure I don't have to give it up. | ||
| Dude, I'm with you. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's me. | ||
| I talk my friends into that shit. | ||
| I talk my friend Tony into buying a Corvette when he can't afford it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I talk my friend Brendan into buying a GT3 RS. Yeah. | ||
| So it's the same thing. | ||
| I mean, I bought the car when I probably shouldn't, but the show was going and I was like, this will make me work harder. | ||
| It sits in the corner when I'm doing it. | ||
| I get up in the morning and I go, I gotta make sure that I can afford that, so let's go do it. | ||
| Dude, I believe in that wholeheartedly. | ||
| And people say you're ridiculous and I go, yeah. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Well, when I was young, when I first got into printing and advertising, shit, I could barely make rent. | ||
| I think I was buying my suits at a resale shop, but I would go to Neiman's and look around and think about what I was going to buy, just putting the motivation in my head. | ||
| I guess there's a big movement now with making your imagination bored or whatever. | ||
| Those people are assholes. | ||
| Yeah, my shit just wanted to be real. | ||
| Just put it in your head. | ||
| That vision board? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I get it if you're 20 and you're doing that and you don't know any better. | ||
| Yeah, my vision board's the old poster of the rock band with some weed in there. | ||
| That looks like a great vision. | ||
| Yeah, that's the real vision board. | ||
| Yeah, I'm a big believer in doing... | ||
| This is what I say to someone who can buy... | ||
| If you can actually buy a Ferrari, I'm like, listen, man, if you don't, who will? | ||
| If you're an 18-year-old kid and you got no money, and you said, man, if I had enough to buy a Ferrari... | ||
| Oh, God, I'd be so happy I'd buy that thing. | ||
| Well, you should do it if you can. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| If you can, you should do it. | ||
| And is it too much money? | ||
| Yeah, it's definitely too much money. | ||
| That's part of the whole point of the whole thing. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| To me, I use it more as motivation. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You know, can I afford this? | ||
| And then if you tell yourself no, you go, well, then I'm going to. | ||
| I'm going to afford it. | ||
| I'm going to figure it out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Exactly. | |
| I feel that way about everything. | ||
| So do I. That's been my mantra forever. | ||
| People are like, oh, you know, you got lucky you did this, you did that. | ||
| I'm like, I worked my fucking ass off my whole life. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, you definitely got lucky you didn't get hit by a meteor. | ||
| You got lucky for a lot of things. | ||
| Well, yeah. | ||
| You got lucky you didn't get home invaded. | ||
| You got a lot, a lot of luck. | ||
| There's a lot of luck. | ||
| But I'll tell you, your past guest, Mr. Elon Musk there, he kind of ruined it for us because now we actually have a possibility of getting in a car wreck in space. | ||
| Yeah, you could get in a car wreck in space because that car's just floating around out there. | ||
| What if that car slams into a fucking alien spaceship that's coming to save us and Elon Musk just frivolously shot that fucking thing into orbit? | ||
| He did! | ||
| He just shot it up there and they let him with a robot sitting in the front seat. | ||
| You know what we were joking around about? | ||
| Like, what if that guy in the front seat is actually a guy who fucked his wife and he decided to kill that guy and stick him in a fucking space suit and shoot him into orbit? | ||
| See, I don't get that. | ||
| Why do you want to be mad at the guy if he does that? | ||
| You gotta be mad at your wife. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| I'm with you on that, too. | ||
| I wouldn't be mad. | ||
| If I came home and a dude was banging my wife, I'd go, listen, bro, I get it. | ||
| You, though, you gotta go. | ||
| Me and your good talk. | ||
| Depends on what he looks like, too. | ||
| I mean, if he's like Aquaman, to her, I'd tell her, I get it. | ||
| Yeah, sometimes you gotta do that. | ||
| Yeah, I get it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, we're going again? | ||
| We're going again, bro. | ||
| This stuff will sneak up on you. | ||
| I've been getting snuck up on since the 80s. | ||
| Salute. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Perfect. | |
| It's so good, though, isn't it? | ||
| It is good. | ||
| It's smooth. | ||
| I like the cinnamon, too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, yeah. | |
| And it's a party drink. | ||
| For a real tequila enthusiast, though, is that like sacrilege? | ||
| Is that like an electric Mustang? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| But that's what the monkey has always done. | ||
| You know, it's like playing the golf thing. | ||
| I decided to launch Gas Monkey Golf apparel line. | ||
| So I'll be wearing my golf shirt out there, and it's pretty crazy. | ||
| It's got a skull and all kinds of crap or whatever. | ||
| But whether I'm pushing the envelope as the monkeys, our tagline is snapping tees and filling holes. | ||
| Now when you bring that to the country club, do people say, sir, that attire is unforgivable here? | ||
| Oh yeah, for sure. | ||
| I've been thrown out of my own country club plenty of times. | ||
| Have you really? | ||
| And I've bought a lot of golf carts because I've crashed them because I thought it was fun. | ||
| You've been thrown out of your own country club? | ||
| A bunch of times. | ||
| Really? | ||
| For what? | ||
| Just raising too much hell. | ||
| You know, it's almost like the old Rodney Daydream movies. | ||
| You know, it's like, sir, you can't do that in here. | ||
| And I was like, ha, well, I'm going to do it twice. | ||
| Caddyshack. | ||
| All time. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Now, what do they say to you? | ||
| They usually just take me home, because I live on the course, so they'll drive me down there. | ||
| Oh, so you have a house on the course. | ||
| I did. | ||
| I live downtown in Dallas now, but... | ||
| The worst one was I decided to drive my Harley home on the golf course one night. | ||
|
unidentified
|
On the grass? | |
| No, I stayed to the cart path. | ||
| I'm not a complete asshole. | ||
| But I did drive it home at about 1.30 or 2 in the morning, and my house is probably the furthest house from the clubhouse. | ||
| And that thing is friggin' loud when you're in that, you know, this trench of a golf course. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| The cops were waiting on me when I got home. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| But thank God they were renting the cops. | ||
| I was like, you can't do anything. | ||
| I'm going inside. | ||
| Fake golf course cops? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah. | |
| You know, the community cops. | ||
| Community cops. | ||
| That's adorable. | ||
| I got a good one for you. | ||
| I actually got arrested at this country club. | ||
| Well, at my house. | ||
| I wouldn't say arrested because they ended up letting me go. | ||
| But they did come cuff me and put me away. | ||
| We're coming home from a Christmas extravaganza, which I do with my buddies every year right before Christmas. | ||
| We get a big card. | ||
| We pile in and we go Christmas shopping for our families and what have you. | ||
| Coming home loaded. | ||
| I supposedly threw a burrito from like Taco Bell or something and hit the guard. | ||
| So there's four, three or four of my buddies. | ||
| We get to my house. | ||
| We pig out on shitty Taco Bell food, you know, until everybody passes out. | ||
| And the next thing I know, the cop lights are on, banging on the door. | ||
| Get out here. | ||
| I come to the door going, Why? | ||
| You know, after you've been drinking and you do a bunch of food, you're fucking gone. | ||
| And so, long story short, they said, well, you're going to be arrested for assault if you don't go down and say you're sorry to this guy. | ||
| Assault with a burrito? | ||
| Correct, right? | ||
| Listen, if you charge a man with assault because he throws a burrito at you, you should turn in your card. | ||
| But we watched the tape. | ||
| It was not like throwing it at him. | ||
| It's not like I barreled him with a baseball right here. | ||
| I like chunked it to him to eat, but he didn't see it coming, and so it like slapped him and fell down. | ||
| So they cuffed me. | ||
| They take me down to the guardhouse. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They cuffed you? | |
| Yeah, they put me in the back of the cop car cuffing. | ||
| Fake cops? | ||
| No, these are real ones. | ||
| Oh, real cops. | ||
| Yeah, he filed a report. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, God. | |
| And so... | ||
| This is how stupid it gets. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Shame. | |
| By then, I'm so freaking loaded, right? | ||
| And I get there, and the burrito's still on the ground like it's evidence or some shit. | ||
| And they're telling me I gotta apologize to this guy, and all I can focus on is, there's a perfectly good fucking burrito right here. | ||
| I'm gonna eat this burrito. | ||
| So... | ||
| I sit down and literally start eating the burrito. | ||
| Oh, God. | ||
| And they're like, please just tell them you're sorry so you can go back home. | ||
| And I'm like, okay. | ||
| So I tell them I'm sorry. | ||
| I'm still eating the burrito. | ||
| And they just left me there, like a mile from my house at the card shack. | ||
| You walk home a mile drunk. | ||
| Well, did you see the guy since then? | ||
| Oh, gosh, no. | ||
| I was like, dude, that was perfectly, I mean, back, this was in the days before the sprinters were so popular, so it was like a stretch limo, which is, you know, you just really don't ride it anymore. | ||
| And I was like, that's a hell of a shot. | ||
| I came out of the back window, 120 inches up to the front, hit the guy square in the fucking chest. | ||
| I should get a medal for that. | ||
| Assault. | ||
| What kind of a man? | ||
| Might be a plus in here. | ||
| A salt with a burrito is probably the first time we've had that here in your little podcast room. | ||
| I definitely think it's the first time. | ||
| It seems like you'd just be able to say, hey, I just threw it to you because I was drunk. | ||
| I thought you were hungry. | ||
| That's really what it was. | ||
| I mean, you could hear me on the video going, hey, you want a burrito? | ||
| And it was pretty ridiculous. | ||
| The guy got his man card yanked for sure. | ||
| Yeah, what someone calls a salt. | ||
| Like, how dare you? | ||
| Some people get beat into a pulp, and you're calling a Taco Bell burrito flying your way. | ||
| That thing costs $1.99, dude. | ||
| And it's barely meat. | ||
| We were going over, like, how much of... | ||
| Like, there's a ruling on how much meat it actually has to be, where you can call it a beef burrito, but there's fillers in that shit. | ||
| Like, what is the filler? | ||
| Was it, like, silicone or something like that? | ||
| But it's something ridiculous, like 34% of it is not actually meat. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ugh! | |
| That's why, I mean, that was 10 years ago. | ||
| Yeah, back then it was probably 80% for the internet. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They just, they can pretend it's meat. | ||
| Well, the cool thing, Taco Bell now is starting to open all their ones up with bars inside there. | ||
| What? | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| Well, that's good for business, you know? | ||
| Get people more drunk because they don't care what the food tastes like. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Exactly. | |
| Get them all tanked up, feed them some burritos, and send them on their way. | ||
| I haven't eaten Taco Bell in decades. | ||
| It's been since then. | ||
| You know, it's wild. | ||
| There's some real legit, because we're in LA. I mean, you're in Texas, but there's legit Mexican places near you, I'm sure. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| But, like, there's legit taquerias here where, you know, you go in there, the Mexican soap operas are playing, nobody speaks English. | ||
| Novellas! | ||
| You gotta point the shit and say things. | ||
| You gotta roll your arse. | ||
| Lengua. | ||
| Lengua quesadilla. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You gotta speak the lingo. | ||
| See, I can't do the lingua stuff. | ||
| That's the tongue, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I can't do that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, shit. | |
| Oh, I don't like it. | ||
| You never have it? | ||
| No. | ||
| I have tried everything. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I mean... | |
| Oh, man. | ||
| You gotta try it. | ||
| Elk tongue tacos. | ||
| I just, why? | ||
| They're fucking delicious. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| It's so good. | ||
| It's one of the most tender meats you could ever have. | ||
| Like the most tender pot roast ever. | ||
| Really? | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| If I ever get a chance. | ||
| There's a place right here on Canoga, like maybe a few miles away from here. | ||
| How good is that place, Jamie? | ||
| When I come to California, I'm not trying to get some elk tongue, I promise you. | ||
| Well, elk tongue's in the freezer, but the cow tongue's what they have out here. | ||
| Yeah, cow tongue. | ||
| Elk tongue's mine. | ||
| But, uh, lengua quesadillas, you know, you don't fuck with that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-mm. | |
| Lengua tacos? | ||
| Uh, no. | ||
| And I don't do the, uh, whatever that milk drink is. | ||
| What do they call that? | ||
| Oh, horchata? | ||
| Yeah, no. | ||
| Horchata's rough. | ||
| Because, you know, there's no fucking safety standards with that. | ||
| No one knows what's in there. | ||
| It could be anything. | ||
| Yeah, it's like really shitty eggnog, and eggnog is shitty. | ||
| It's at least 6% jizz, too. | ||
| At least. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| Depending on who's working there and how disgruntled. | ||
| But you do carne asada, right? | ||
| Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I've got a couple of bars and restaurants down in Texas, and so we sell a lot of Tex-Mex fusion. | ||
| Tex-Mex is a different kind of flavor. | ||
| It's a different thing. | ||
| People that don't know what queso is, queso in Texas is like a staple. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Out here, no one knows what the fuck queso is. | ||
| You say, I want to get some queso and chips. | ||
| They're like, what the fuck are you talking about? | ||
| Danny Trejo's does. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| There's a few places. | ||
| There's a few legit Mexican places. | ||
| I like a real good, legit Lotus. | ||
| You know, the corn with all the mayonnaise and the sour cream in Yeah. | ||
| I could get down on some of that for sure. | ||
| Texas is a different fucking country. | ||
| It really is. | ||
| Well, where I'm at in Dallas, literally I can go to the corner gas station and there's a lady there just sawing the corn off the cob and puts it in the styrofoam cup and squirts all the crap in there. | ||
| I can make myself sick on that stuff. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I wonder why Tex-Mex is so much different. | ||
| Because there's no California-Mex, right? | ||
| But Tex-Mex is a legit... | ||
| Well, y'all would never allow that word to be said anyways. | ||
| California-Mex? | ||
| We probably just pissed off 72,000 people. | ||
| That's just a regular podcast for me. | ||
| I know, right? | ||
| He said California Mex. | ||
| Try ordering license plate. | ||
| California is Mexico, asshole. | ||
| We stole it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We stole it from the Mexicans. | |
| Exactly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What do you think about this wall bullshit? | ||
| Open it up. | ||
| Let all those poor people in here. | ||
| Give them jobs. | ||
| I don't give a fuck. | ||
| Tax it, yeah. | ||
| I mean, I don't want criminals. | ||
| I don't want criminals coming through. | ||
| How about we filter out gang members and criminals? | ||
| I wish there was a way to tell. | ||
| There's not. | ||
| I wish there was a way to tell whether someone's a piece of shit, a criminal. | ||
| I wish there was. | ||
| Or someone's just poor. | ||
| Because there's a lot of... | ||
| For sure, both sides are right. | ||
| This is how I look at it. | ||
| For sure, the people that don't want criminals coming in here are right. | ||
| For sure, the people that want border control to keep out gang members and drug dealers and evil people, they're right. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| Look, I'm a fucking American taxpayer. | ||
| I have a family. | ||
| I fucking salute. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I believe in the law. | ||
| I believe in all those things. | ||
| But also, my grandparents are immigrants. | ||
| All of them. | ||
| Everybody that is related to me came over from Europe. | ||
| They all came over from Italy and Ireland. | ||
| All of them. | ||
| They all came over because their life sucked. | ||
| They want a better place. | ||
| If someone walks here from Guatemala, they don't walk here because they're lazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They walk here because they want a better life. | ||
| This is what America's made for. | ||
| So I say let them in. | ||
| I say let them in too, but I wish there was a better way to screen out the cunts. | ||
| If there was a better way to screen out the real shitty human beings, to stop, that would be ideal. | ||
| We need a cunt screener. | ||
| A cunt screener is the way to go. | ||
| I'm going to fucking tag that right now. | ||
| It doesn't exist right now. | ||
| If any of my people are listening, make sure you buy that dot com. | ||
| But the whole thing that all these fucking government workers aren't getting paid right now because of a wall. | ||
| Oh, Jesus. | ||
| And there's a billionaire. | ||
| You know, Donald, you believe in the wall that much. | ||
| Take five billion out of your fucking account. | ||
| Shove those shekels towards the wall. | ||
| He doesn't have five billion. | ||
| How much does he have, you think? | ||
| They say he's got three, but it's all paper, I think. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's all just smoke mirrors. | ||
| Ones and zeros somewhere. | ||
| It's like his hair. | ||
| But, you know what? | ||
| We elected him, so we gotta deal with it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And in our case, he was the better choice. | ||
| He was the better choice. | ||
| This is why he's the better choice. | ||
| To realize that our system is completely hosed. | ||
| That this guy could get in there and build that wall, lock her up, and everybody's like, check me. | ||
| It's a good example of how our system is the best system in the world, for sure. | ||
| This whole experiment and self-government is the best on the planet Earth, without a doubt. | ||
| But this guy... | ||
| It's not his fault. | ||
| That is who he is. | ||
| But he exploited it. | ||
| He showed everybody the holes in this fucking goofy system. | ||
| I know, but he's a reality star. | ||
| I could be president one day. | ||
| You could. | ||
| You and me. | ||
| Let's run. | ||
| It's the ticket. | ||
| The Rogan Rawlings ticket. | ||
| We could win. | ||
| And I'm not bullshitting. | ||
| You know we could win. | ||
| I could do that. | ||
| Dude, they did some fucking Vegas odds and they found out that I have better chances of winning than a lot of people. | ||
| That would be freaking rad. | ||
| Yeah, there's like a whole list of people who I had better... | ||
| I want to see you just like throwing them out. | ||
| I got this. | ||
| But, you know, I mean, no one's gonna, you know, it's not gonna work. | ||
| The most fun that I'm having right this second is not even in this room. | ||
| So my manager and my PR person are back there just waiting on me to fuck up on talking about politics. | ||
| Yeah, see, I don't have one of those. | ||
| My manager's awesome and my PR person is non-existent. | ||
| So, let's get round three going. | ||
| Let's go. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
| Salute, sir. | ||
| Salute. | ||
| America. | ||
|
unidentified
|
America. | |
| Woo! | ||
| I'm telling you, it just keeps getting better. | ||
| Yeah, it does keep getting better. | ||
| It's good whiskey. | ||
| Or tequila. | ||
| Whatever the fuck it is. | ||
| I forget now. | ||
| Yeah, politics, that is the one thing that people say you shouldn't talk about. | ||
| But isn't that what helps us to talk about it? | ||
| It's just that people are so fragmented. | ||
| People fragment out everything you say, and they're like, well, you know, it's like you said something, but then they turn it into this one little sentence going, wait a second, he said these two descriptive adjectives and this fucking noun and this verb, and look at what he said. | ||
| He said we need cunt screening. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You heard him. | ||
| I told my people to buy cuntscreening.com. | ||
| I don't know what I'm going to do with it, but we're going to use it. | ||
| Well, if we could just figure out a way to put microchips in everybody, we'll know where everybody is and what everybody did, and that way we'll know if you're a cunt. | ||
| You walk past this little thing and it goes, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, you'll walk by, he throws burritos, but he's a good guy. | |
| He owns 50 cars. | ||
| Well, a lot of them are for sale. | ||
| But we keep some pretty cool stuff in there. | ||
| But I'm a big 32 Ford guy, so I've got all the 32 Fords. | ||
| What is 32 Ford? | ||
| Why does that one... | ||
| Because that's like, to most... | ||
| Guys like myself, anyways, that's what started the hot rod movement. | ||
| They were cheap, they were plentiful. | ||
| The guys came back from WW2 and they bought a $20 32 Ford and it stubbed a V8 in it and that became the hot rod scene. | ||
| Right, because in 1947, a 32 Ford was like the old used car that you could get. | ||
| Yeah, you bought that thing for like $20, maybe even $10 or $5. | ||
| Now we're paying 50 for one that needs everything. | ||
| What was your first car? | ||
| My first car was a 73 Mercury Comet. | ||
| My first car was a 73 Chevelle. | ||
| Well, that's way cooler than a piss green Mercury Comet, I promise you. | ||
| It didn't last. | ||
| I drove it from the guy I bought it from, I got it home, and the next day the engine blew. | ||
| That's operator error. | ||
| No, let's just see. | ||
| This is a shitbox. | ||
| It was just a terrible car. | ||
| Mine had a straight six-cylinder, so it wasn't fast. | ||
| It wasn't cool. | ||
| It was that piss green from the 70s, and it was pea green interior, and the ladies didn't like it, and it had the squeaks and stuff. | ||
| I'd be pulling into high school and going over the speed bumps like... | ||
| And I'm like, shit. | ||
| This is not cool at all. | ||
| But by the time I graduated, because I always worked hard, mowed yards, rake leaves, whatever I could do, I was a hustler. | ||
| So by my senior year, I was driving a 77 Bandit Trans Am. | ||
| Now the ladies started paying a little bit more attention. | ||
| That's legit. | ||
| Those cars are still legit. | ||
| Those bandit Trans Ams. | ||
| That movie just revolutionized Trans Ams. | ||
| It revolutionized cars in movies. | ||
| When you had Burt Reynolds on your show, I have to say that I got sad. | ||
| When I saw him walk out, I was like, oh man, that's Burt Reynolds? | ||
| He's that broken down? | ||
| You know... | ||
| He was really bad, broken down at that point in time, but towards the end of his life, he came back kind of full circle. | ||
| He was a whole different kind of person about a year and a half, two years later. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How? | |
| I don't know, but I don't know if he was just going through a bad spot. | ||
| But towards the end, he was hip, cool. | ||
| We did a lot of different things together that you'll see. | ||
| Really? | ||
| You know, and what have you. | ||
| But the cool thing that not a lot of people know, in my office I have the hat. | ||
| The hat with all the feathers and the what have you. | ||
| You have his hat? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So when I was filming at his house, Bert comes out. | ||
| He goes, hold on a second. | ||
| I'm like, get you something. | ||
| And he goes in, comes back out. | ||
| And he goes, I didn't ever know who I was going to give this to. | ||
| It's not that one. | ||
| It's the one from Smoking Man 2. That is two. | ||
| Well, fuck it. | ||
| It's sitting in there, and I've got a picture of him giving it to me. | ||
| And... | ||
| I had, like, man tears. | ||
| I mean, I had, like, my hair was growing on my arms and stuff, you know, standing up, and I'm like, dude, I can't take that. | ||
| And he goes, oh, you will. | ||
| And I'm like, okay, I mean, who's going to tell Burt Reynolds no? | ||
| And so it sits there as kind of a memorial, and he was a super cool guy, and he was really a car guy. | ||
| But also, there it is. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Burt Reynolds giving you his hat. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He was a badass, man. | ||
| So he didn't have a cane at this point in time. | ||
| So whatever it was, he must have some surgery or something like that? | ||
| I don't think so. | ||
| I think he was just frail at the time. | ||
| And he recovered? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This was four years ago, maybe. | ||
| And now, you know, he just passed away, but he came around, you know, he does the Barrett-Jackson stuff with us, and I've got a friend of mine that owns a company, Restore Muscle Car, that does just Trans Am type stuff, and it was cool. | ||
| Those Smokey and the Bandit years were when I was in high school. | ||
| 81, I was a freshman in high school. | ||
| I was 84. So I remember watching those movies and saying, like, this guy, he's like having fun. | ||
| He was smiling. | ||
| And he was like, he was silly. | ||
| That's the secret to Gas Monkey. | ||
| I'm like fucking having a blast. | ||
| It's not a big fucking deal. | ||
| I mean, look at all the other ones that people don't talk about a lot, like Hooper or Stroker Ace, not to mention Cannonball and all the other ones. | ||
| I mean, they were literally a group of guys that kind of took over Hollywood for a small period of time and just had a blast. | ||
| Just had good times. | ||
| Yeah, they were like, hey! | ||
| You know, this might be fun to go film this movie for two weeks across America and fuck shit up. | ||
| Let's go do it. | ||
| Alright, cool! | ||
| Well, he was just silly. | ||
| He was, like, always smiling and silly. | ||
| And he had Jackie Gleason was the enemy. | ||
| Like, come on, man. | ||
| When you got Jackie Gleason is the evil guy? | ||
| I mean, you got a goddamn great movie. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's silliness. | ||
| I need a Dr. Pepper. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And a Diablo sandwich. | ||
| Make it fast. | ||
| I'm gonna hurry. | ||
| I mean, it was just... | ||
| I mean, Jackie Gleason from The Hustler is a bad guy in a cop movie. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You son of a bitch! | |
| Those are great fucking movies. | ||
| And Sally Fields is the girlfriend. | ||
| I mean, it was just fucking amazing, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Goddamn. | |
| There you go. | ||
| I love those movies, man. | ||
| Dude, and getting to shave my goatee off and dress like that and do the show that I did was absolutely second to none. | ||
| I'm like, this is as cool as it gets. | ||
| I'm done. | ||
| Cool, like a cover tie. | ||
| What did you do with that car? | ||
| Did you sell it? | ||
| Yeah, we actually gave it away on Discovery. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yeah, so somebody got it. | ||
| It's a good car. | ||
| It's a really nice car. | ||
| Great-looking car, man. | ||
| Goddamn, those Trans Ams from that year, with the Firebird on the fucking hood. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God! | |
| They're so ass-heavy, though, man. | ||
| Oh, yeah! | ||
| Dude, you can't... | ||
| Doesn't matter how good a driver you are, that thing is ass heavy. | ||
| It'll come around on you in a heartbeat. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| Mine I bought, my dad was actually mad. | ||
| They said, my parents told me that I couldn't get it because they said they couldn't afford the insurance and everything and they didn't know I was always hustling and doing stuff and what have you. | ||
| So I just showed up at home one day with it and they were like, we told you. | ||
| I said, I paid cash and I paid for a year's worth of insurance up front. | ||
| And my dad's like, Where the fuck did you get that money? | ||
| And I said, Dad, I've been working. | ||
| He goes, how much money you got? | ||
| So I take him to my room, I show him my shoebox, and he's like, Richard, that's more than I make. | ||
| What were you doing to make that money? | ||
| Oh, dude, I was a hustler back then, selling car stereos out of my trunk, you know, selling anything anybody would buy, raking leaves, mowing yards. | ||
| I mean, I was kind of a geeky kid at the time and a little bit on the small side, so I had a lot of free time. | ||
| I wasn't exactly banging the cheerleaders or anything. | ||
| You know, so I knew I just always kind of was a hustler and wanted to make some money. | ||
| Your dad had to respect that. | ||
| Oh, he did. | ||
| He did. | ||
| He was actually very impressed. | ||
| He was like, shit, son. | ||
| He goes, we don't have that much in our family bank account. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And I was like, well, that. | ||
| But my dad is a phenomenal dude. | ||
| Worked three years. | ||
| You talk about a good dad. | ||
| You're a dad. | ||
| And so am I. But a good dad. | ||
| My mom left when I was two. | ||
| Ditched my dad with me at two and my sister at six or so. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| You know, it was the 70s. | ||
| So you would think that my dad would be like, I'm going to smoke this weed and drive away. | ||
| But instead, he buckled down, got two jobs, and he worked two jobs pretty much my whole life and provided for us. | ||
| And we definitely didn't have much, but we had a roof and we had food and shoes. | ||
| Are you still in contact with your mom? | ||
| No, not really, man. | ||
| I hate to say that out loud. | ||
| But my mom, she lives down in Florida. | ||
| I'm sure she's... | ||
| Whatever she is, but, you know, she's a little too much for me. | ||
| I have the exact opposite story. | ||
| Oh, yeah? | ||
| Yeah, my mom left my dad when I was five, and I haven't even spoken a word to my dad until I'm seven years old on. | ||
| No kidding. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, I've actually kept up with my mom, and we talk about it every two or three years, and it reminds me of why I don't talk to her anymore, so... | ||
| Then I'm good. | ||
| Well, I'm sure if I met my dad, it'd be the same thing. | ||
| But I have a stepdad who's a great guy. | ||
| I got real lucky. | ||
| Yeah, I had a stepmom and it didn't turn out super great, but she did teach me a little bit about math and, you know, how to run books because she was basically a thief. | ||
| But, uh, so... | ||
| I at least learned from the experience. | ||
| Only one stepmom, though? | ||
| That's rare. | ||
| Until I was out of high school, yeah. | ||
| Then my dad went on to marry a series of superly freaking just effed up individuals. | ||
| I mean, he just started running through them. | ||
| And I was like, Dad! | ||
| Did he marry any of them? | ||
| Yeah, he married two or three of them, I think. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's something about people that get married five, six, seven times. | ||
| I respect that. | ||
| This is what I respect. | ||
| I respect people that keep fucking swinging. | ||
| Even though you go down in the fifth, you get back up, and you go down in the sixth, you go down in the seventh, but you're still there. | ||
| They're just looking for the party. | ||
| My dad was like that. | ||
| He was like, ah, it's a fucking good party, son. | ||
| Come on out. | ||
| I'm getting married. | ||
| He had one wife that one time I get there for family Christmas on either Christmas Eve or whatever. | ||
| It's like going to the dad's house with the young kids and what have you. | ||
| And we get there and she's all doped up on whatever pills were popular at the time. | ||
| And she's like, hey... | ||
| Come on. | ||
| Take your shirt off. | ||
| Come here. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| And I'm like, yeah. | ||
| And before it's Owen, she's crawling around on the floor and trying to take off her clothes. | ||
| And the whole family's sitting there like, what the hell is this, Dad? | ||
| And so now he's in an Alzheimer's home. | ||
| But yeah, that's the part about it's scary about turning 50. But He's like in there nailing all these chicks. | ||
| We go in there and he's like making out with some girl with a nasal cannula on and carrying her oxygen bottle. | ||
| And he's convinced that they've been married for a few years. | ||
| I have a bit in my act about the outbreak of STDs in nursing homes. | ||
| It's out of control because of Viagra. | ||
| Oh, it's not only just that. | ||
| These people, I mean, my dad has really advanced Alzheimer's, and he knows that he misses his Mustang, I took all his bicycles away, and I need to get laid. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| I mean, and he's in there just running around. | ||
| We got called, my sister and I take care of my dad in that manner. | ||
| And so we get called to the home, almost like being called to the principal's office as a parent. | ||
| And they're like, your dad's literally in here fucking everybody. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And I'm like... | |
| I mean, I literally had the feeling of getting jinked in there to the principal's office like, your kid's a fuck up. | ||
| Your dad's fucking everyone. | ||
| But you had to be proud. | ||
| Oh, heck yeah! | ||
| What does he care? | ||
| What do y'all care? | ||
| Why do you care? | ||
| That's my point. | ||
| That's what I say about him in my acts. | ||
| Like, come on, man. | ||
| How do you want these people to die out? | ||
| Want their heart to stop while they're playing bingo? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Come on. | |
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Have a good time. | ||
| Just don't let them hurt each other. | ||
| Well, see, I'm in the healthcare business also, home healthcare. | ||
| You are? | ||
| Yeah, I've got a lot of different ventures. | ||
| How are you in the home healthcare business? | ||
| Home health care with my wife, 16, 17 years, maybe longer. | ||
| So in the state of Texas, it's probably the second or third largest home health care. | ||
| But I'm talking real home health care. | ||
| You've got to get shots. | ||
| You've got to get therapy. | ||
| These are RNs that are going in. | ||
| They're not people going to bathe grandma. | ||
| What is your business? | ||
| So you hire a bunch of nurses to take care of people that are at home? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's prescribed through Medicare or insurance or whatever to where maybe somebody gets a knee or a shoulder replacement or maybe it's an injury or cancer or what have you. | ||
| And so it's a very rewarding business. | ||
| We probably have 3,000, 2,500, 3,000 patients at any given time all around the state of Texas. | ||
| That's amazing. | ||
| And so it's a fun business to be in that you're really getting to help people, but at the same time, This shit out there is crazy. | ||
| These guys are getting after it. | ||
| You go into the nursing home and it's like, damn, dude, this 78-year-old dude has had more ass than I had in the last week. | ||
| They don't have anything else to do! | ||
| Nothing! | ||
| Yeah, why not? | ||
| Why not? | ||
| My thought is why not? | ||
| Well, I bought my dad, you know, he's got his room that's kind of like an apartment or whatever, and I bought him stripper sheets. | ||
| Not stripper sheets, but twister. | ||
| Twister sheets with all the red and blue and green dots on it. | ||
| And I hung the board thing up behind his bed. | ||
| I'm like, Dad, if you're getting after it, you might as well have fun. | ||
| I mean, fuck bingo or freaking whatever. | ||
| So because he has Alzheimer's, does he remember when he gets after it? | ||
| I think it's that he's just so focused on it. | ||
| He was, what would you call him, a Casanova. | ||
| My dad got some serious ass my whole life. | ||
| As a teenager, I was like, God damn, my dad's banging everything. | ||
| Well, I guess when your wife leaves you with kids when you're young, you just realize, okay. | ||
| Forget about this long-term shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let's just enjoy the moment. | ||
| Yeah, but my dad was a straight-up product of the 60s and 70s, so he would dye his hair blonde and his eyebrows blonde and shit and walk around looking like Matthew McConaughey from Dazed and Confused. | ||
| All right, all right, all right. | ||
| Driving his Mustang. | ||
| He'd come pick me up from school. | ||
| What kind of Mustang did you have? | ||
| Back then, it was like a 72 fastback, you know, red and black with a four-speed. | ||
| And he'd be hammering it, and I'm like, you know, five, six years old. | ||
| I'd fall on the floor because nobody wore a freaking seatbelt back then. | ||
| And his idea of after-school care was the skating rink, because he knew that thing would be open until nine. | ||
| So, drop us off. | ||
| I'm at the skating rink eating a 99-cent corndog meal, and he'd come pick us up, usually around 10 or 11, with some irate skating rink owners sitting there pissed off. | ||
| He's like, Oh, wow. | ||
| He was a badass, though. | ||
| Or he is a badass, still. | ||
| I mean, he's nailing chicks in a freaking nursing home. | ||
| Come on! | ||
| It's so weird when you become an adult, isn't it? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| You know, when you think about, uh-oh, round four, here we go. | ||
| Well, we've got to drink one from Raymond Rawlings. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| Raymond Rawlings. | ||
| Raymond Miller Rawlings. | ||
| Baddest motherfucker that ever lived. | ||
| Salute. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| I mean, I guarantee you he got more ass than you and I did this whole week. | ||
| I believe it. | ||
| He's freaking probably banging one right now. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's like, hey, what's that noise in the back? | ||
| Sounds like my son. | ||
| Is he on the TV? Plus, the goal is, or the bonus, rather, is that they can't get pregnant. | ||
| Well, you got that. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, it's over. | ||
| Yeah, well, I mean, that's not happening. | ||
| But you can still get some diseases and stuff. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And they do. | ||
| Yes, they do. | ||
| But the thing is, where are they getting them? | ||
| Well, somebody had it, and then the next thing you know, all 100 people in that building have done it. | ||
| Right, but did they have it already? | ||
| Or are they getting it from the building? | ||
| Nah, they had it already. | ||
| They had it already. | ||
| So are you dealing with herpes, or are you dealing with the real weird ones, like syphilis and gonorrhea and shit? | ||
| The syphilis and gonorrhea is like, hey, you gotta treat this. | ||
| Where are you getting this? | ||
| Oh, no, it's prevalent. | ||
| It's everything. | ||
| Right, but the question is, like, are they getting it from outside sources? | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| I mean, who knows? | ||
| You had that, unfortunately, that just had the baby, you know, that's been invalid for 20-something years. | ||
| Oh, that's crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That's a dark story. | ||
| Somebody knocked her up, and I'm like, holy shit. | ||
| Between 2007 and 2011, chlamydia infections amongst Americans 65 and over increased by 31%, and syphilis by 52%. | ||
| Yeah, but the problem with that is 52%. | ||
| All right, okay. | ||
| Let's say there's 100 cases, and then the next year, there's 150. All right? | ||
| That's 52%. | ||
| No. | ||
| That's not that big. | ||
| There's tens of thousands. | ||
| Hundreds of thousands. | ||
| There's millions of people. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Millions of people in nursing homes. | ||
| Hundreds of thousands. | ||
| My dad's probably in there going, come on, baby, I'm going to buy you some chlamydia. | ||
| I don't like the number of Because if there's four people and then the next year there's six, that's 50% increase. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| I don't like numbers like that because you could make, oh my god, it's an epidemic. | ||
| I want numbers like human beings. | ||
| Yeah, well, I'm sure it's out there on the web, but like I said, my dad probably thinks chlamydia is a flower he's giving this girl. | ||
| I'm going to get you some chlamydias and we're going to have a good time. | ||
| Yeah, there's no condoms in nursing homes, you know? | ||
| 43,000 reported cases of chlamydia among people 45 and older. | ||
| Okay, but I'm 45 and older. | ||
| That's normal. | ||
| 45 and older, people are walking around, meeting new people. | ||
| 43,000 seems like a very low number. | ||
| Super low. | ||
| That's what I'm saying. | ||
| That's why I don't like these percentage numbers. | ||
| See, from doing this podcast all these years, I understand when people can make things seem greater than they really are. | ||
| Go back to that, Jamie. | ||
| Do you have your AARP card? | ||
| No, but someone sent one to us, to me and Ari, to the comedy store, but I think that was some asshole. | ||
| 43,000 sounds low. | ||
| Yeah, primary and secondary syphilis. | ||
| 5,650 cases were reported in this age group. | ||
| But that age group, 45, the thing about 45 and older is 45-year-old people in 2019, it's not like 45-year-old people in the 60s. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| These animals are out there fucking hitting the gym and doing squats and flying to Thailand. | ||
| They're probably getting it from the sweat on the gym bench. | ||
| They could get staph, for sure. | ||
| I know a lady who almost died from staph from the gym. | ||
| She ignored. | ||
| She had some weird rash on her leg. | ||
| And no one told her that it was a staph infection. | ||
| And she went into shock and had fucking seizures from staph. | ||
| And she's... | ||
| 36? | ||
| 37? | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| She's my wife's friend. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| Dark shit. | ||
| Yeah, you don't want that. | ||
| Dark. | ||
| Dark. | ||
| Staph. | ||
| From a gym. | ||
| I don't want it. | ||
| That's why I don't go to the gym. | ||
| That's why I tell everybody, no staph. | ||
| I'm not getting it. | ||
| You gotta go to the gym dressed like a superhero. | ||
| You gotta wear tights. | ||
| I'm going to call myself Super Zero. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Tights and rash guards and fucking... | |
| You're over there spraying all the chemicals everywhere. | ||
| Yeah, like two guns, two spray guns in each hand of alcohol. | ||
| Everything. | ||
| No, I like the spray gun with alcohol, but it's one with tequila and one with something else. | ||
| Do some fucking chin-ups, one in the mouth. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I've got staff twice from jujitsu. | ||
| Oh, yeah? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Ringworm three times, at least. | ||
| Staff twice. | ||
| I had ringworm once. | ||
| It's rough. | ||
| Ringworm's okay, but ringworm is basically athlete's foot. | ||
| Did you know the same thing? | ||
| Yeah, more or less, yeah. | ||
| You know you piss on your feet to make athlete's foot go away? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Girls go, what? | ||
| Because girls can't aim with their piss. | ||
| No, I can. | ||
| I can help them. | ||
| I have this new patented... | ||
| I'm just coming up with this. | ||
| Gas monkey funnel. | ||
| Remember the fundal thing that they came up with, the sheenal? | ||
| Yeah, there is a thing that girls can use. | ||
| They stuff in their crotch that they can pee standing up. | ||
| I just think that's probably not very sanitary. | ||
| Well, urine is not really unsanitary. | ||
| It's not really that bad. | ||
| It's not a dangerous thing. | ||
| It's not like shit. | ||
| I haven't, but I wouldn't be scared of it. | ||
| I'm not scared of piss. | ||
| There you go, Miss Rogan. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Don't pee until he gets home. | |
| This is the thing about jujitsu. | ||
| You're so used to dudes sweating on you. | ||
| Like, because you're always, like, guys are sweating. | ||
| Like, there was one time that I was rolling with a friend of mine, and he got on top of me, he mounded me, and he was sweating in my fucking face. | ||
| Like, his chest sweat was dripping in my face, and we were laughing about it. | ||
| I was like, dude, what the fuck? | ||
| You're sweating in my mouth, basically. | ||
| This is starting to get weird. | ||
| Well, it's just part of learning how to kill people. | ||
| To deal with the reality of training. | ||
| We're from Texas. | ||
| We just use guns. | ||
| No, that's not true. | ||
| There's a lot of jiu-jitsu schools in Texas. | ||
| I'm looking up stats on the STD thing for older people, and this says an article I found said only 5% of adults are using Medicare to take the STD tests. | ||
| So it could be way higher. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's way higher. | |
| They're just not getting tested. | ||
| It's way higher. | ||
| They're like, suck it up. | ||
| I was in Vietnam. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Come on, it's just a rash! | ||
| Yeah, I mean, the thing is, like, who's trying to stop these people? | ||
| Why stop them? | ||
| They're gonna die. | ||
| Let them get after it. | ||
| Yeah, why stop them? | ||
| I'd be going in there and passing out all kinds of lube and toys and just get after it. | ||
| Yeah, meth. | ||
| No, I wouldn't do that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why not? | |
| I don't know, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Let them try it. | |
| If you're gonna try meth, try it when you're 90. Yeah, that's an easy way out. | ||
| Well, it's not even a way out. | ||
| It's just a way forward. | ||
| Well, no. | ||
| We gave these ladies in my family weed for the first time when they turned 80. First time? | ||
| 80 years old. | ||
| They had never done anything, so we gave them some brownies. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And we told them, don't eat all the brownies at once. | ||
| Just eat a little bit, wait an hour, see how you feel, blah, blah, blah. | ||
| They're like, well, we're trying it. | ||
| We don't feel anything. | ||
| Next thing you know, it's like only an hour later and they've ate the whole pan. | ||
| Now they think it's the greatest thing since sliced bread. | ||
| They're like, just bring brownies. | ||
| Thanksgiving dinner? | ||
| Yeah, just bring brownies. | ||
| Just bring brownies and they just like melt with the universe. | ||
| Weed is tricky in Texas though, right? | ||
| Yeah, it's not legal yet. | ||
| It's gonna be. | ||
| In California though. | ||
| It's right here. | ||
| I got that Elon Musk trouble weed. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| This is what's called a blunt. | ||
| It's tobacco on the outside and marijuana on the inside. | ||
| A nursery car shit dropped Tesla stock 6% in one day. | ||
| Oh, my manager and PR person out there are just literally shitting their pants right now. | ||
| But it's legal. | ||
| Well, it's legal here, right? | ||
| Fuck it, I'll do it. | ||
| Yeah, there you go. | ||
| I believe in the law. | ||
| It's 100% legal here. | ||
| Get some of that, Jamie. | ||
| It is 100%. | ||
| Who's the dude that... | ||
| Oh, Mike Tyson just brought you some of his weed. | ||
| Is that how it comes? | ||
| This is the box of death and life, right here. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow! | |
| This is Mike Tyson's box of death and life, yeah. | ||
| This is how hard Mike Tyson rolls. | ||
| Look at the size of these fucking joints he gave me. | ||
| I know the camera's not gonna be able to follow me, but I'll be right back, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| Look at this shit. | ||
| Look at the fucking size. | ||
| Oh, that's just insane. | ||
| That's stupid. | ||
| That's you, bro. | ||
| I can't go. | ||
| You take that. | ||
| I can't take it with me. | ||
| You gotta smoke it before you get on the plane. | ||
| How do I get on the plane, then? | ||
| You just think. | ||
| Think, and you'll appear in seat 4C. That's the key. | ||
| I would recommend anything more than one more. | ||
| That's enough for me. | ||
| Alright, Jamie will take one more. | ||
| Yeah, he gave me these joints that would make you think about people you fingered in high school and want to find them on Facebook and apologize. | ||
| This is just, what is that? | ||
| That's a goddamn cigar of marijuana. | ||
| That's outrageous. | ||
| Mike Tyson has a whole ranch. | ||
| He has a whole, put in this new one. | ||
| He has this Tyson Ranch that he's growing marijuana, and he's going to have a resort destination where he's going to have fitness classes. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| Tiptoe through the tulips? | ||
| Exactly! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Tiptoe! | |
| Tiptoe through the tulips. | ||
| He's got a place down in Palm Beach. | ||
| Where is it? | ||
| Palm Springs? | ||
| Palm Springs. | ||
| Palm Springs. | ||
| Palm Beach is in Florida. | ||
| Palm Springs, California. | ||
| Out in the desert, they're developing this enormous property where they're going to grow weed, and they're also going to have this huge place where people can go and have this resort. | ||
| Like a weed amusement park. | ||
| Yeah, literally. | ||
| They're going to have concerts there, like Coachella-type events. | ||
| What do they call it? | ||
| The Kush Fest or some shit? | ||
| Kind of. | ||
| Kindfest in February. | ||
| They're not fucking around. | ||
| The people behind it have deep pockets, and they're going hard. | ||
| Because what people have seen in Colorado, and people are starting to see in Washington State, and now in California, is there's this enormous amount of money involved in marijuana. | ||
| Like crazy, ridiculous, silly profit. | ||
| If you're doing it, and you're taxing it, and you're doing it responsibly, the way I look at it, it's no different than going to the store to buy a beer. | ||
| Any asshole can buy too much beer and do something stupid. | ||
| We've had four shots in an hour on a radio show. | ||
| Yeah, but I have a driver. | ||
| I have a driver. | ||
| That's good. | ||
| That's the way to do it. | ||
| Responsibly. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| I mean, owning a tequila company and bars and restaurants, you kind of have to... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It takes the fun out of it because I'm a driver. | ||
| I'm a car guy. | ||
| Everything else, but... | ||
| Yeah, but be responsible. | ||
| Always be responsible. | ||
| And, you know, the thing is also... | ||
| If you're a person who likes fun, are you trying to stop fun? | ||
| Like if someone wants to smoke a little weed, have a little tequila, drink a couple of beers, as long as people are being responsible. | ||
| Yeah, I don't see a drastic difference between alcohol or marijuana as long as you're obeying the laws, being responsible, paying your taxes. | ||
| Yes, I 100% agree. | ||
| I also talk about it this way. | ||
| Imagine if all the people in the world were you, me, and Jamie. | ||
| And if Jamie had decided that he thought that we were criminals and we're not allowed to drink alcohol anymore, Jamie's going to install prohibition in our small community, he'll be ridiculous. | ||
| He'll be like, fuck you, man. | ||
| Well, that's literally like the government telling you you can't do mushrooms or the government telling you you can't smoke weed. | ||
| It's just a grown man telling other grown men they can't. | ||
| Based on what? | ||
| It's not based on what we voted on. | ||
| Like, if people really knew the information involved in, like, the safety of marijuana, does it freak you out? | ||
| Yeah, of course it does. | ||
| Does it make you paranoid? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah! | |
| 100%. | ||
| But does alcohol make you an asshole? | ||
| Fuck yes, it does. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| But do I think that everybody should have all of it? | ||
| CBS rejects Super Bowl. | ||
| I saw that. | ||
| Based on the benefits of medical marijuana. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well... | |
| In their defense, there's probably a bunch of people who are stockholders, and there's a lot of decisions that are made by lawyers. | ||
| Before people get angry about something that CBS decides to do, you have to understand that CBS is responsible for the employment of untold thousands of human beings. | ||
| They're going to have Bud Light ads right next to this. | ||
| They will. | ||
| Or whatever. | ||
| Yeah, they will. | ||
| They will. | ||
| But Bud Light ads are not going to affect anyone's bottom line. | ||
| I don't agree. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| I don't agree. | ||
| But I just want people to understand that part of the problem is that the business aspect of this has not been fully established. | ||
| Once it's fully established, CBS and all these people are going to realize it isn't any different than Bud Light. | ||
| It's not any different than anything. | ||
| You can get fucked up on Bud Light if you just drink 20 of them. | ||
| You can be fucked up. | ||
| You can walk into trees. | ||
| Well, you can do it on cough medicine or whatever. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes, yes. | |
| All that stuff's out there. | ||
| Anything. | ||
| I mean, how many pharmaceutical drugs can you get fucked up on? | ||
| And do we deny that some people who have serious injuries benefit greatly from pain pills? | ||
| No, they definitely do. | ||
| The thing about it all is you've got to be honest and let people form their own opinions, and part of being honest about these things is telling them the pros and the cons. | ||
| Everything is a pro and a con, including old people banging it out in nursing homes. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| I mean, they're getting chlamydia. | ||
| You know, that's not good. | ||
| The pro and the con is my dad's a pro banging old ladies in a nursing home, but the con is he's probably got some stuff on his little wiener down there. | ||
| Yeah, he's probably passing some biological footballs. | ||
| But he's not getting pregnant. | ||
| Yeah, he's not getting pregnant. | ||
| No one's getting pregnant. | ||
| And listen, folks, people get colds. | ||
| They get the flu. | ||
| All sorts of weird things happen when people corral around other people. | ||
| What are we supposed to do? | ||
| Live like John Travolta and the boy in a plastic bubble and fucking lock ourselves in hermetically sealed chambers and never touch each other again? | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| This is true. | ||
| Just take your penicillin. | ||
| Walk it off. | ||
| That's what Napoleon did. | ||
| Walk it off, Gladys. | ||
| Gladys, I think you might have given him a thing or two. | ||
| Just hit the mass and kill. | ||
| You'll be good. | ||
| I wonder who's delivering these venereal diseases. | ||
| That would be fascinating if we found it was primarily women. | ||
| It was like 78% of women are the original source of the venereal disease. | ||
| Well, they pulled the apple down, right? | ||
| I don't believe that happened. | ||
| I think there was a bitch-ass man who blamed it on the chick. | ||
| When I heard that Adam and Eve story, I was like, yeah, right. | ||
| Maybe Adam was a bitch. | ||
| Maybe he blamed it on Eve. | ||
| He was the guy who could write, so he wrote things down. | ||
| He's like, Eve ate the apple. | ||
| I didn't do shit. | ||
| I listened. | ||
| I'm a good listener. | ||
| He probably ate the apple first. | ||
| He probably gave it to Eve. | ||
| You know, history's written by the winners. | ||
| This is correct. | ||
| And a lot of women, they let that shit go. | ||
| They're just like, let them talk. | ||
| Yeah, right down the night, I ate the apple. | ||
| Fuck you. | ||
| And he's like, fuck you. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| Adam and Eve. | ||
| I don't see Adam and Eve having that New York accent, though. | ||
| Where the hell did he get it? | ||
| New York wasn't there yet. | ||
| I feel like Adam and Eve would talk like British people. | ||
| Because anytime they have a movie where people talk like old-timey, whether it's Gladiator or whatever, everyone talks with an English accent. | ||
| You ever notice that? | ||
| Like, if we have to... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| If we have to, there's like the suspension of disbelief. | ||
| Like, we don't know Latin. | ||
| They're talking Latin. | ||
| Who the fuck knows what that sounded like, right? | ||
| So when you're watching some old-ass movie about people talking Latin, they'll speak English, but they'll speak it with an English accent. | ||
| Right? | ||
| They'll only speak proper. | ||
| They always have some weird old-timey way. | ||
| You're not going to watch the movie. | ||
| You would never watch the movie otherwise. | ||
| Right, but you're right. | ||
| But why is that? | ||
| Because it's got to make it watchable. | ||
| That's why they ruin stories anyway. | ||
| But to English people, is that played out like Eleanor's are played out to him? | ||
| Do you know what I'm saying? | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| To English people, they hear that accent every day. | ||
| That's a normal accent. | ||
| But to us, it's like, oh, this is like an old-timey language. | ||
| English people are like, why is Russell Crowe talking like he's from fucking London? | ||
| This is bullshit. | ||
| Yeah, I got a friend of mine, Big Chris, and he likes to say, well, we invented the English language. | ||
| And I'm like, yeah, you fucked it up. | ||
| Yeah, you guys made it so that people don't understand it. | ||
| That's stupid. | ||
| That's not smart. | ||
| We made it better. | ||
| We really did. | ||
| I hate to say that to you folks. | ||
| My rebuttal to him was, oh yeah? | ||
| Well, somebody from your town's still trying to be a rapper. | ||
| In their defense, though, they will always say to you, like, yeah, but listen, you guys respect our language more than you respect yours. | ||
| And it's true. | ||
| Like, American English is not as respectable as English English. | ||
| Because that's why they use those English people to sell, like, late night mops and shit. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Oh, they do, don't they? | ||
|
unidentified
|
They do! | |
| Fucking non-stick frying pans. | ||
| It's always some man with a proper accent. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at this! | |
| I can just fry these eggs and they slide right onto the plate. | ||
| Amazing! | ||
| Unbelievable! | ||
| And look, I'm going to throw a bag of nickels in there and scratch it up. | ||
| Look, not a scratch! | ||
| If that was a guy from Jersey that was selling you that, you'd be like, look at this asshole trying to lie to me about his bullshit frying pan, right? | ||
| And his fucking shitty mop. | ||
| But something about, like, English accents get us. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| They have a better, they have a more respectable version of our language. | ||
| But ours sounds better. | ||
| You could say it easier. | ||
| I understand it. | ||
| They understand us. | ||
| We don't always understand them. | ||
| I was literally just on a phone call with a lady in Europe before I got in here. | ||
| And I couldn't understand a word she was saying. | ||
| The thing is though, here's where I'm wrong. | ||
| Here's where I'm wrong. | ||
| They understand each other. | ||
| They fucking... | ||
| They'll start... | ||
| I was in... | ||
| Belfast, Northern Ireland, which is... | ||
| You might as well be in the cantina scene in Star Wars. | ||
| These motherfuckers, they barely speak English. | ||
| They speak English for sure. | ||
| They understand each other 100%. | ||
| But to me, I was talking to this guy, and he was drunk out of his fucking mind. | ||
| We were drinking dark beer. | ||
| Just me and this dude. | ||
| This is like early 2003. Early UFC. UFC in Dublin. | ||
| All I remember this guy saying, I'll fight any man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| He was hammered. | ||
|
unidentified
|
To him, he was making perfect sense. | |
| All I caught was, I'll fight any man. | ||
| This motherfucker might have said that a hundred times. | ||
| We just kept buying drinks. | ||
| Hammered. | ||
| With me and some dude with Belfast, we understood like 20% of what each other was saying. | ||
| You gotta use the translate thing on your phone. | ||
| It wouldn't work. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'll fight any man. | |
| Oh, what is this call? | ||
| This guy. | ||
| This guy. | ||
| This guy's sober. | ||
| The only queue Simon you'll be skipping is the queue to the hospital. | ||
| They'll be putting all the other passengers aside to see to you. | ||
| Pause it! | ||
| Now imagine being hammered, post UFC event, trying to mingle with the locals. | ||
| We're drinking dark beer and whiskey. | ||
| There's maybe 30 people around me that are yelling like that. | ||
| And I'm talking to this dude. | ||
| So all the people around me who are yelling, I'm fucking drunk. | ||
| No one knew. | ||
| No one knew what anybody next to him was saying. | ||
| Everybody's loud and hammered, and this guy is fucked up, and he's telling me this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How to fight honeyman. | |
| And I'm like, okay. | ||
| You go fight him. | ||
| That's so funny. | ||
| We've pulled up this video before, that exact guy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How to fight honeyman. | |
| On an old video a long time ago. | ||
| What is this one? | ||
| This is really old. | ||
| You're talking about this guy. | ||
| Oh, me telling me about this guy? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Oh, that's hilarious. | ||
| Here he is right here. | ||
| I guess it's a bird... | ||
| That's like fucking eight years ago or some shit. | ||
| What is that from? | ||
| You got two things playing at the same time. | ||
| There's two things playing. | ||
| There's something going on in the background. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Did you hear it? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Damn, I had a beard back then. | ||
| That's the same guy. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Now, that's like pikey language, right? | ||
| Yeah, I guess. | ||
| The first video I pulled up said he was from, I think I typed in Belfast or something. | ||
| But here's the thing. | ||
| Here's where I'm wrong. | ||
| They fucking understand each other 100%. | ||
| They understand every word they say. | ||
| So I'm wrong. | ||
| I'm just not in that environment. | ||
| Why don't you hang out and you'll get it. | ||
| It's got a flavor though. | ||
| They have a flavor that we don't have, right? | ||
| It's a dark old world flavor. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hi, listen mate. | |
| That's a fucking dude who just came over on a boat and he's shooting arrows at people. | ||
| They kept that same language. | ||
| And they're always looking to fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm ready. | |
| Oh, I'm sure you get a bunch of that shit. | ||
| I'm a pretty friendly guy. | ||
| So most of that stuff I don't get. | ||
| The guys that I get are people that want to be like professional fighters. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| And they want to just talk about it a little bit. | ||
| And they're always very friendly. | ||
| You'd be amazed. | ||
| Like... | ||
| People that aspire to be professional fighters are some of the nicest fucking human beings you're ever going to run across. | ||
| Because they've figured out their own ego through competition to the point where they're not worried about putting out an image. | ||
| They know who they are. | ||
| And they're real friendly. | ||
| Some of the nicest people that I've ever met ever are professional fighters. | ||
| That's a weird thing for people to hear. | ||
| But I think that for men, there's something about trial through combat and just understanding what it's like to overcome unsurmountable obstacles for the average person. | ||
| It just makes them calmer. | ||
| There's a different kind of human. | ||
| They're more chill. | ||
| They are. | ||
| Believe it or not, my hairdresser for 15 years has been cutting my hair. | ||
| You probably don't have this problem. | ||
| I used to. | ||
| It was a real struggle. | ||
| He's bald-haired and he's a fighter. | ||
| Do you trust him? | ||
| I wouldn't trust a bald dude to cut my hair if I had a nice hair like you. | ||
| And he's a fighter. | ||
| He's going to give me a Z somewhere. | ||
| He's over there with all his muscles and shit hacking away at my head and I'm like, This is not really trustworthy at all. | ||
| Yeah, there was a video out that someone showed me. | ||
| Was it you? | ||
| Did you show me, Jamie? | ||
| I didn't even ask you what it was first. | ||
| That's how drunk we are. | ||
| Someone took a phone and it had a sound like a hair cutter and they run it by people's heads and they run away and people freak out on them. | ||
| Oh, there's nothing wrong with that. | ||
| They run it up the back of a girl's head. | ||
| It's a good practical joke. | ||
| I mean, it'd be way better with a real razor. | ||
| So mean. | ||
| It would be. | ||
| But that's a big deal for people. | ||
| Can't be cutting off their hair. | ||
| See, I've always wanted to shave my head at least once in life. | ||
| You never have? | ||
| Nah. | ||
| You should just get a crew cut. | ||
| You're a beautiful man. | ||
| Oh, thank you. | ||
| You have a fucking perfect shaved head. | ||
| You got a nice thick head of hair. | ||
| Yeah, I know. | ||
| But now, you know, contracts and crap. | ||
| They tell you, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. | ||
| Gotta keep the same style, man. | ||
| No. | ||
| Continuity. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Which I kind of call continuity because it's like, do these people really believe I just did this in an hour or was it over the course of a few days, okay? | ||
| I mean, I always tell them, I'm like... | ||
| What do y'all think, as producers and networks and whatever, how bad do y'all think the American public is? | ||
| I mean, how unintelligent that you have to do a scene where I just walked in your door and sat down here and put on my headphones, and then they flipped me over somewhere else going, yeah, so I walked in the door and put on my headphones. | ||
| I mean, it's so insane. | ||
| And it's like the recipe. | ||
| It's like you have to tell them everything you do. | ||
| And then I set up for the shot and I have to walk out the door. | ||
| They're like, well, the audience won't know where you came from. | ||
| It's my fucking shop. | ||
| I'm here. | ||
| What do you mean I got to walk through that door? | ||
| They won't have any idea. | ||
| They'll be so confused. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| And I've tried so hard to change the recipe a little bit. | ||
| I understand you have to do certain things, but why do you have to tell the audience what they just saw? | ||
| Period. | ||
| Yeah, they're not stupid. | ||
| If you make them stupid, you can make them stupid. | ||
| You'd never challenge them ever. | ||
| I think that as a society, we might be on our way to that, what was that show, Idiocracy? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Idiocracy, yeah. | |
| Because I argue it all the time. | ||
| I love my show and I love what we do, but I'm like, why do I got to come out of the door, put my headphones on, and then go, so I got there and I put my headphones on. | ||
| It was unbelievable, especially after I came through that door. | ||
| It's so fucking stupid. | ||
| But they've always done it that way. | ||
| And I think of it the same way I think about CBS and their medical marijuana ads. | ||
| There's like a bunch of people that are just trying to protect jobs. | ||
| They're just like, we're going to make it easier. | ||
| Easier for people to know. | ||
| You can't have anything left to chance. | ||
| They've got to fill their numbers. | ||
| Well, they act like it's such a bad thing that they can't show that commercial. | ||
| But at the same time, we're selling boxes that say, this will kill you. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| And people are buying them. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Why do you think they still break up shows with commercials? | ||
| Wouldn't it be more effective if they didn't do that? | ||
| It's just a monetization problem, I'm sure, but I think you could get a little more bang for your buck by having this episode by so-and-so. | ||
| Yes! | ||
| 100%. | ||
| Not only that, I think instead of having two or three ads every five minutes or whatever they make it do, how about you just have a couple of product placements? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Correct. | |
| On the show and have them cost more. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| And then you've got to put it into the recipe. | ||
| So some guy like us, it's car guys that are watching the show and they're like, holy shit, he just bought that Porsche. | ||
| And then it goes commercial and it's like, I'm getting a beer and I'm going to sit back down on the couch. | ||
| And then the next five minutes is me going, so I went to LA and I bought a Porsche. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You already saw that part. | |
| I just wasted that guy's time. | ||
| Yes, exactly. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| And the only reason why you have to do it is because you imagine that people are coming in from these breaks. | ||
| They're just jumping in in the middle of it. | ||
| They might. | ||
| They might be doing that. | ||
| How about make them figure it out? | ||
| Correct? | ||
| Figure it out, bitch. | ||
| Rewind it. | ||
| They need to get rid of the Nielsen whole bullshit. | ||
| Is that real? | ||
| They're still counting cable boxes. | ||
| But are they even counting cable boxes? | ||
| They're not doing anything. | ||
| They have a Nielsen box, right? | ||
| So it's not even like a cable box. | ||
| There's only like a few thousand or whatever, and then they decide what the rating is, and it's like, are you kidding me? | ||
| Because I'll see my ratings, and I'm like... | ||
| I know it was more than that. | ||
| I own the internet company. | ||
| So I own a social media company. | ||
| I'm like, oh, we had way more viewers than that. | ||
| I wonder how they do really know and whether they just accept the fact that even if they don't know the real numbers, at least they have a reliable percentage that everyone can agree on. | ||
| So if everyone agrees on it, they'll set their advertising rates based on that agreement. | ||
| Yeah, more or less. | ||
| But the real ideology of it is we have the access, because all these devices and everything else, to have the real number. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Like the real, real number. | ||
| But everyone would have to give it up, right? | ||
| Like Verizon would have to give it up. | ||
| And none of them want to give it to each other and they want to say, I think they just need to remap the program. | ||
| And so they can really see how many people there are. | ||
| Because right now in the industry, people think the viewers are way down. | ||
| And I actually tend to disagree. | ||
| I think they're up, just the way that we count them are bad. | ||
| It's definitely not good because I've never been counted. | ||
| I've never fucking filled out a Nielsen thing. | ||
| I've never used a Nielsen box. | ||
| I don't know anybody who has. | ||
| Neither do I. I met one dude once that said that his brother was like... | ||
| Can you even find a picture of a Nielsen box? | ||
| Does it exist? | ||
| You know that DirecTV has some numbers, right? | ||
| They must have some numbers. | ||
| It's all digital. | ||
| Hell yeah, they got numbers. | ||
| Down to the... | ||
| Why wouldn't they know? | ||
| Even if they're not using it as some sort of a rating system that affects the ratings of a television show, you would think that they would want to know how effective their product is. | ||
| If you can measure that, why wouldn't you measure that? | ||
| And they've just never changed it. | ||
| They really do need to, though. | ||
| It'd be way cool if they did. | ||
| It would be weird. | ||
| It'd be weird if you found out what everybody was watching. | ||
| What if, like, Keeping Up With The Kardashians is like a billion people an episode? | ||
| We've found that most of the world is going, what the fuck? | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| Actually, the world still looks at him and goes, what the fuck? | ||
| Yeah, but what if most of the world... | ||
| What do you think is like... | ||
| The biggest disparity has got to be satellite and cable, right? | ||
| Because they're not allowed to measure those. | ||
| The mobile phone thing, like mobile phones, they say Netflix specials, like comedy specials, they say 40-something percent of people plus watch them on their phones. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, I've started to watch everything on my iPad and my phone. | ||
| I don't really watch TV anymore. | ||
| I watched the UFC on my phone, on ESPN+. I was like, wow, this is crazy. | ||
| I'm watching live fights on my phone with a regular connection, not Wi-Fi. | ||
| This is a weird time. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I remember when we were younger, we spent thousands of dollars for the giant TV in the box. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It had the projectors. | ||
| Well, the thing about the phone is it's kind of selfish. | ||
| It's like personal. | ||
| If you're watching a movie on your phone, that's just you watching that movie. | ||
| Yeah, you're not going to get it. | ||
| You can't sit next to your wife and watch a movie on your phone. | ||
| No one's going to deal with that. | ||
| Even if you're on a plane, that would suck. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| But watching a fight on a phone, it's way less interesting than watching it on a big screen, but you could take it everywhere. | ||
| So eventually they're going to get that into some large thing, like a hologram or some shit, or augmented reality. | ||
| It's not going to be too much longer before they're doing all the AI. Yeah. | ||
| Augmented reality, I think, is really what's interesting to me. | ||
| Well, isn't Netflix doing something with that right now, with that one show they have out where you can pick the different endings? | ||
| Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| That's the Black Mirror show. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They have a movie. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Go back to that article again. | ||
| It's not a new article, it's just an example of one. | ||
| I was going to say that the TVs have been known to watch what's on your screen and send that data back to a database based off of everything that's currently live on TV. The same thing happens with audio streams and Shazam. | ||
| There's a couple of different companies that do that. | ||
| So they sell you data. | ||
| Yeah, so then they'll sell that back to advertisers. | ||
| Sort of like the same way what's happening with some of these apps. | ||
| That's how people found out that companies are tracking you because there's third-party companies that are selling that data once they have it because they don't need it for everything. | ||
| See, the problem with this kind of shit with people is that that's not what the agreement was. | ||
| The agreement wasn't that you tell people what I'm watching. | ||
| The agreement was I buy a TV from you. | ||
| That was the agreement. | ||
| Like, when you say, oh, we're gonna sell the data from the people that are watching your TV, you're like, okay. | ||
| Well, yeah, but the bed is coming in from your cable. | ||
| I guarantee it's buried in your cable deal. | ||
| Yeah, the South Park joke. | ||
| We get to keep it. | ||
| Oh, does South Park have a bid on that? | ||
| Well, that whole human centipede thing, the terms of service, like, no one's reading it, but you're agreeing to becoming... | ||
| I haven't seen that episode. | ||
| ...like a joke becoming a fucking thing. | ||
| So how's it go? | ||
| I'm sorry? | ||
| Like, just agreeing to the terms of service. | ||
| Like, you don't know what you're doing, and, like, the joke on that was that you're agreeing to become a human centipede. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I never saw a human centipede either. | ||
| I've been to a couple bars. | ||
| I've seen some. | ||
| Yeah, they're going to get us in weird ways, but they're just trying to find out who's watching what. | ||
| The thing is, should your TV be able to just watch you? | ||
| Should it be able to have a line on what you're watching? | ||
| Because I know people now that just use Netflix, and they don't have anything. | ||
| They have an internet connection that's hooked up to their television. | ||
| Television connects to Netflix automatically. | ||
| It's like one of the native apps. | ||
| Yeah, but if you're connected to the internet, you're getting watched, you know, is what most people would say. | ||
| I'm so paranoid about it, I have a little piece of duct tape on my camera on my iPad. | ||
| It's a good move. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a good move. | ||
| I don't need that on there. | ||
| But the thing is, it's like, yeah, but why are you selling data? | ||
| Because someone wants to buy it. | ||
| Yeah, but why are you allowed to just collect data from people? | ||
| It's pretty much in the contract you sign, I guarantee it. | ||
| Literally, there should be two prices. | ||
| This should be one where you're allowed to collect data. | ||
| You can collect data from me, but it costs like 50 bucks more. | ||
| A year. | ||
| And the other one where, you know, you can't collect my data. | ||
| I have to pay a little bit more money. | ||
| That's kind of happening. | ||
| There are, like, apps you can use that'll track how much you're walking in exchange for letting you turn on that. | ||
| They'll give you stuff. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, whatever. | ||
| If it's useful to you, I don't know. | ||
| What are you talking about? | ||
| Like, if you walked by a McDonald's, they can serve you up a McDonald's ad? | ||
| For sure. | ||
| No shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, that's the ultimate goal, right? | ||
| It's to figure out where you are and target you with something. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So my friend Adam Greentree was on here and we were talking about, he lives in Australia. | ||
| And he lives, he travels like deep into the outback where it takes like three days to drive in. | ||
| And I said, everybody has Toyota trucks because those fucking things never break. | ||
| They don't. | ||
| They don't. | ||
| And so he gets ads all of a sudden out of nowhere on his phone every time he goes to a website that says Toyota trucks. | ||
| He's like, what the fuck? | ||
| He goes, I didn't Google it. | ||
| Those are called cookies. | ||
| Well, it's kind of called cookies, but it's not something that came from a search. | ||
| It's something that came from something in his phone is listening. | ||
| We said the word Toyota trucks. | ||
| It registered it, and it added it to his queue of his Google search. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I got so many messages from people after we brought this up. | |
| So many messages from people that brought... | ||
| When we brought this up the other day, I got tons of messages. | ||
| Like, you guys mentioned... | ||
| Do they think it's real? | ||
| ...say X, and they started getting served ads for that. | ||
| Like I said, I just said chlamydia. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Penicillin, Inc. | ||
| He tried to buy stock. | ||
| It's like, he's got so much chlamydia, we're going to sell him all the penicillin. | ||
| But it would be smart. | ||
| Not to interrupt. | ||
| My assistant just said, just bought... | ||
| Stock and chlamydia? | ||
| Cuntscreener.com. | ||
| We actually own it. | ||
| Gas Monkey actually owns CuntScreener.com now. | ||
| The border wall is a fucking tough question. | ||
| A certain amount of people are just going to be mad at you. | ||
| You fucking cucks. | ||
| Why don't you go over there and suck all those Mexican dicks? | ||
| I don't know about that. | ||
| Some people are going to get there. | ||
| They're going to get angry. | ||
| I might go down and chase some Latino ladies for sure. | ||
| It's such a hot fucking topic. | ||
| But that's also, if you open yourself up to comments. | ||
| Well, somebody brought one up the other day that was a general discussion question and said, you know, why don't we just do DNA for the sake of your board? | ||
| We take your fingerprints. | ||
| We take everything else. | ||
| We check you all out. | ||
| Why don't we just do the DNA? And I get the privacy part of it for later on. | ||
| But at the same time, you're solving a lot of problems from the very beginning. | ||
| Okay, this person just came out of here and they've done nothing. | ||
| Right. | ||
| So now if they ever do anything... | ||
| We know to go shoot them in the back of the head. | ||
| Well, we certainly could do that, but we would have to place a gigantic priority on getting the very best people in law enforcement. | ||
| You would have to eliminate all shitheads. | ||
| You would have to pay those cops way more and treat them With the respect that they deserve as people that literally are protecting you from violent criminals. | ||
| I was one, I know. | ||
| I'm a huge supporter of cops. | ||
| I've been around cops most of my life because of martial arts. | ||
| I know a lot of cops. | ||
| And this is a weird issue with people where they fuck the police. | ||
| No. | ||
| You're saying fuck the police, you might as well say fuck the humans. | ||
| If someone does something bad to someone, we don't say fuck all humans. | ||
| If someone murders someone, we say fuck that guy, and then you start breaking it down to whatever group you're not a part of. | ||
| So it's fuck that... | ||
| X-generation guy. | ||
| Fuck that Lebanese guy or whatever nationality he is. | ||
| Fuck that straight guy. | ||
| Or if he's gay and he killed somebody, fuck that gay guy. | ||
| But it's just humans. | ||
| We're all individuals. | ||
| No matter what it is. | ||
| No matter what we're talking about. | ||
| And as soon as you start breaking everybody down into groups, like, oh, fuck these people. | ||
| You can't do that with everybody. | ||
| They're just because of... | ||
| What's that? | ||
| Then it just becomes a fight. | ||
| Everybody's bitching. | ||
| You can't do that. | ||
| You can't do that. | ||
| We're all fucking in this thing together. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| Goddamn, we're drunk, right? | ||
| Probably too drunk. | ||
| We're not drunk yet. | ||
| You only had one hit of that weed. | ||
| That's all I needed. | ||
| I'm probably going to be in trouble for that. | ||
| Did they give you a hard time about that? | ||
| Who knows. | ||
| The way I look at it is, it's legal in California where I'm at, so it's legal. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| How many people used to go down to Mexico to watch whatever or do whatever? | ||
| I'm amazed that people are still bringing in weed from Mexico. | ||
| That shows me a real lack of American ingenuity. | ||
| That's outrageous. | ||
| Well, the Canadians are the ones that are growing the most weed now. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What do you Google it, Jamie? | |
| CuntScreener.com currently will redirect you to this podcast. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Did it really redirect? | |
| Oh, that is so fucking stupid. | ||
| The internet is undefeated. | ||
| I gotta give a shout out to my people. | ||
| They set that up. | ||
| That's amazing. | ||
| Your people did that that quickly? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You got some rock solid human beings working for you. | ||
| So we're automatically directed to Cutscreener.com. | ||
| I hope Discovery Channel doesn't get hit with a wave of protests. | ||
| What channel are you on? | ||
| Discovery. | ||
| Yeah, it is Discovery. | ||
| They have a giant network, though, right? | ||
| How many different channels are on the Discovery Network? | ||
| Total channels, I think, is like 80 or 90 or something. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's crazy. | |
| It might be more than that. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| I mean, they have some channels that I've never even heard of, like the Brick Wall Channel. | ||
| I have no idea. | ||
| Just insane stuff. | ||
| They divide it all down. | ||
| I think there needs to be a little consolidation in the market. | ||
| Yeah, well, you know, it's... | ||
| Everybody loves Top Gear, right? | ||
| Like, Top Gear is probably, like, one of the greatest car shows of all time. | ||
| I never really watched it. | ||
| How dare you! | ||
| I'm telling you. | ||
| How dare you, Richard Rawlings! | ||
| But it's, uh... | ||
| Is it dead now? | ||
| Or is it still... | ||
| Well, they've... | ||
| They're the Grand... | ||
| What is it? | ||
| The Grand Tour? | ||
| Or something like that? | ||
| Something like that. | ||
| On Amazon. | ||
| Amazon picked it up. | ||
| I haven't watched a single episode of the new one. | ||
| But the old one was the shit. | ||
| And part of it that was fun was that, you know... | ||
| Those guys were kind of nuts. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's what we do, you know, at Gas Monkey. | ||
| We cut loose, we have fun, we light stuff on fire, break it, whatever. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And there was some violence. | ||
| What's his name, the head guy? | ||
| Clarkson, was it? | ||
| Jeremy? | ||
| Jeremy Clarkson. | ||
| Got into a little trouble. | ||
| Punch some producer, right? | ||
| Oh, trust me. | ||
| I don't know if that producer deserved it or not, but I've had to reserve myself quite a few times. | ||
| People get crazy. | ||
| You're putting a show together. | ||
| It's a lot of work. | ||
| Especially those guys, the producers, the camera guys, the sound guys, the people that are sitting in the discovery offices and all that, they have jobs. | ||
| This is my life I'm putting on every single day. | ||
| And so not only do I have my whole life on it and in it, but then I have to deal with filming it. | ||
| And I've tried to explain that to them because they don't care to a point if the show does well or bad because there'll be another Richard down the road. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| Yeah, there's a lot of high volume approach when it comes to those kind of like cable shows. | ||
| They just try to bang out as many as they can. | ||
| High volume, you know? | ||
| And they have a formula that they try to follow and they have a lot of like set up scenarios where people get in trouble for things where they're not really getting in trouble. | ||
| It's just all set up in advance, you know? | ||
| It's almost scripted, right? | ||
| A lot of reality shows. | ||
| Some of them can be. | ||
| You just poured the fifth shot. | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| I think it's the fourth. | ||
| Or is it fifth? | ||
| I think it's the fifth. | ||
| But I think it's that they... | ||
| I was telling myself this morning I should cut back on drinking. | ||
| I tell myself that every morning. | ||
| But it's so wild because I've known as the guy that likes to drink some cold Miller Lights and hang out in the garage. | ||
| So even on my own bars and restaurants and stuff, and they'll come in, they're like, I'm buying you a beer. | ||
| And I'm like, sir, you really don't have to. | ||
| I own the place. | ||
| Oh, I'm buying it. | ||
| I'm like, you really don't have to. | ||
| They're like, no, I'm buying it. | ||
| And I'm like, ring him up, Sally. | ||
| Well, it makes people feel good. | ||
| People like buying people shit like that. | ||
| That's a beautiful thing about booze. | ||
| People like buying people a drink. | ||
| Let me buy you a drink. | ||
| All right! | ||
| It's like a nice gesture. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| People don't buy people sandwiches, right? | ||
| They buy people drinks. | ||
| Oh, I'm down for a pizza, sandwich, anything, anytime. | ||
| I'm going to buy you an herbal tea. | ||
| No one's ever said that. | ||
| Yeah, no. | ||
| Well, we're in California. | ||
| I'm sure they're saying it right now. | ||
| They probably said that. | ||
| Would you like matcha or just the regular herbs or what? | ||
| People probably said that. | ||
| Just try to appear spiritual. | ||
| I'd like to buy you an herbal tea. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| I'd like to purchase you with Bitcoin an herbal tea. | ||
| I had a girl ask me just the other day, she goes, your aura seems different. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Interesting. | |
| I'm like, I don't get that, lady, at all. | ||
| She goes, well, I see you every year here at Bear Jackson, and your glow is different. | ||
| Your glow is different. | ||
| I'm like, well, I'm still using the same Tom Ford Axe body spray thing. | ||
| People have weird things they say to people to fuck with them. | ||
| Are you gaining weight? | ||
| Are you gaining weight, Richard? | ||
| Your aura's different. | ||
| Yeah, you look so thin. | ||
| Is your diet okay? | ||
| Is your diet okay? | ||
| My diet's great. | ||
| Your aura's different, Richard. | ||
| I'm trying to figure out what's wrong. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Are you not happy? | |
| Are you not happy? | ||
| Oh, I'm perfectly happy. | ||
| What's wrong? | ||
| What's wrong? | ||
| Like, what's wrong with you, crazy? | ||
| Okay, fine. | ||
| Fuck it up. | ||
| That's what they're hoping. | ||
| They're hoping you're ready to crack. | ||
| I can't take it any longer. | ||
| It's a fucking... | ||
| They're just juking you. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| I know you're scared. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They're tricking you. | ||
| Tricking you and revealing some shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Your aura's off, Richard. | |
| Something's wrong with your aura. | ||
| You should probably be able to punch people that say that. | ||
| We should definitely go, hey, fuck off. | ||
| Auras aren't real. | ||
| Bitch, you need to draw the aura. | ||
| Show me what the... | ||
| You gotta have some science behind this. | ||
| The whole ideology of fuck off is my thing. | ||
| So the gas muggy ring? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Underneath it says fuck off. | ||
| I'm shaking your hand. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How you doing? | |
| That's hilarious. | ||
| You should always be able to say fuck off. | ||
| If you can't say fuck off, but you have to be judicious, right? | ||
| You have to say fuck off when fuck off is appropriate, but you have to also salute people when they're not full of shit. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| He's like, you're definitely not the person I'm telling the fuck off. | ||
| You're alright. | ||
| You're a good dude. | ||
| You're alright, man. | ||
| You gotta have positive and negative. | ||
| Like someone who's telling you they're reading your auras. | ||
| Okay, you might be able to. | ||
| I mean, I don't know what the fuck you're seeing. | ||
| I barely know what I'm seeing. | ||
| I have no idea if what I'm seeing is really even remotely similar to what you're seeing. | ||
| I'm just assuming. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| It's just a guess. | ||
| Some people like weird fucking cars, right? | ||
| Some people are really into certain cars you go, I don't get it. | ||
| Yeah, like a Pinto hatchback or something. | ||
| Some people are really into those. | ||
| Pintos are popular with some groups. | ||
| Some people are really into gross looking shit. | ||
| I don't know what they're seeing. | ||
| Maybe they're seeing something different than me. | ||
| Well, it's just probably a combination of their childhood, their upbringing, what have you. | ||
| But isn't, like, is it possible that, like, personal taste is a lot like sprinting speed? | ||
| Like, not everybody is going to be Carl Lewis, right? | ||
| Not everybody is going to be some, who's another fast guy? | ||
| Hussein Bolt. | ||
| Hussein Bolt is the fastest ever, right? | ||
| He's supposed to be, yeah. | ||
| He's the fastest ever. | ||
| Not everybody can do that. | ||
| So, isn't it possible that that would also apply to taste? | ||
| There's people out there that really get what's wrong with your fucking shitty taste. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And there's other people out there that likes fox-bodied Mustangs. | ||
| I'm really into fox-body. | ||
| I think it's the best-looking car of all time. | ||
| It's the best ever. | ||
| I just left Barrett-Jackson, and when you see something roll across the stage, and you're just like, bleh, why in the hell did somebody just buy that? | ||
| Why are you buying that? | ||
| I don't get it. | ||
| And they're over there clapping, and they're all happy, ordering drinks for their friends. | ||
| Look, I just bought an 81... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Thunderbird Turbo. | ||
| I brought a Mustang 5.0 like Vanilla Ice had in this video. | ||
| We're going in dangerous waters there. | ||
| My buddy sold one at Barrett last year. | ||
| It's the Vanilla Ice car. | ||
| It's not the worst car in the world, but if you had to compare, what is that, like, 87, 88? | ||
| Like, what was that car? | ||
| What year was that? | ||
| The Vanilla Ice car? | ||
| 89? | ||
| Was it 89? | ||
| Okay. | ||
| That 5.0? | ||
| Mustang 5.0? | ||
| Maybe it was 87. He had a drop top down so his locks can flow, didn't he? | ||
| Something like that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, he grew up just up the street from where I grew up. | ||
| I met him at a UFC, I believe. | ||
| I believe he was very nice. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| Bam. | ||
| My friend Kevin Chason had one of those, but he didn't have a convertible. | ||
| Rolling in my 5.0. | ||
| We were like fucking 20 years old. | ||
| That car, back in the day, was the shit. | ||
| If you had one of those cars, you were a fucking hero. | ||
| It was fast. | ||
| It was fun. | ||
| It was also like, it was the car to have. | ||
| It had like 230 horsepower. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Did it really? | |
| Probably. | ||
| A 5.0? | ||
| I wonder. | ||
| It might not have had any more, but it was good because we were all stupid and we didn't know how to drive anyway. | ||
| But those cars were, at that time, for whatever reason, Like, whatever was wrong with people, that was a good-looking car. | ||
| But if you looked at that car compared to, like, a 69 Mach 1, like, get the fuck out of here. | ||
| How did you do this? | ||
| Go to a 69 Mach 1. That's the best car ever. | ||
| Go to a black 1969 Mach 1. Absolutely best car ever. | ||
| It's one of them. | ||
| I mean, there's some arguments out there of one or the other, but it's in the fucking race for sure. | ||
| It's in the top three. | ||
| Go to a Black 69 Mach 1. Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| That's a resto mod piece of shit. | ||
| Find a real one. | ||
| It's true. | ||
| That is a resto mod, but the shape is in order. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| That's a Boss 9 car. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's correct. | |
| There's a Mach 1. Oh, look how good that is. | ||
| The one down there, the big picture. | ||
| It's a 70. Oh, is it a 70? | ||
| Yeah, you've got to have four headlights on the 69. Oh, that's right. | ||
| It's the missing side lights. | ||
| 71 Mach 1 was what Keanu Reeves had. | ||
| Well, that's what it changed. | ||
| No, he had a Chevelle, didn't he? | ||
| No, he had a Chevelle after they stole his fucking Mustang. | ||
| That's why he went on a killing spree. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, that's what it was. | |
| Dude, they did the ultimatum, okay? | ||
| They killed his dog and they stole his Mustang. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| You gotta go kill those people. | ||
| Yeah, they killed some Russians. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| I actually did some promo for that show. | ||
| It was pretty good. | ||
| That fucking movie... | ||
| Here's what's... | ||
| There it is. | ||
| There's the John Wick Mustang. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| The guy was talking to him in Russian about his Mustang. | ||
| Fuck, that's a good car. | ||
| The show was great because the kid was just a total fuck-up. | ||
| The father's like, what do I do with this? | ||
| Do I kill my kid or kill this dude? | ||
| And then he came with what I said. | ||
| We were talking about your Chevelle, your 68 Chevelle. | ||
| I go between 68, 69 and those 1970s. | ||
| Sometimes I look at those 70s and I go, God damn, that's the perfect car. | ||
| They look a little tougher. | ||
| It's a madman's car. | ||
| Look at that one. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Woo! | |
| I need one. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at that goddamn thing, that Mach 1, 69. We're going to build one on the show. | |
| Oh! | ||
| Hopefully this year. | ||
| That's a fucking beautiful car. | ||
| Yeah, 69 Mach 1 and the Boss 429. I need to get into building some of these movie cars because I've seen some of them up close and they're shit. | ||
| Go to Classic Recreations, Boss 429. Go to this. | ||
| You need to see this. | ||
| He made this murdered out 1969. And it's, look at that thing! | ||
| How dare you! | ||
| Now that's perfect. | ||
| Woo! | ||
| That's perfect right there. | ||
| Jesus Christ! | ||
| Look at that goddamn car! | ||
| Yeah, whoever owns that right now, give me a call, I might buy that. | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| That's pretty awesome. | ||
| That's about as America as an eagle killing a terrorist. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| Look at that fucking car, man. | ||
| Don't go away from that picture, Jamie. | ||
| Go back to that picture. | ||
| Good lord. | ||
| That's pretty good. | ||
| There's not a better looking car. | ||
| There's just different. | ||
| Nothing's better looking than that. | ||
| It doesn't exist. | ||
| I don't give a fuck what anybody says. | ||
| There's nothing better looking than that car. | ||
| There's just different. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| We've had a few Boss 429s through the shop, but definitely not a modern one like that. | ||
| There's a gang of evil cars from that day, but there's not a better looking one than that. | ||
| Dude, people just, I mean, the manufacturers were just trying to one-up each other. | ||
| I mean, it was kind of just the wild west of automobile and like, I'm going to, I'll do you, no, I'll do you. | ||
| And I wish, you know, we're sort of in that again right now. | ||
| Yeah, right now. | ||
| Dodge and Chevy and Ford are kind of doing the same thing right now. | ||
| They are, and it's also elevated everybody's interior game. | ||
| Keep that up there. | ||
| Don't you take that down. | ||
| God, it's like shutting down porn. | ||
| What's wrong with you? | ||
| Everybody's interior game stepped up, too, because it used to be like the Germans and the Japanese had much higher build quality with the interiors, but Corvette has had to step up its game considerably. | ||
| The new Corvette's a very nice interior. | ||
| Tony Hinchcliffe has one. | ||
| Stand-up comedian extraordinaire, Tony Hinchcliffe. | ||
| He's got a Grand Sport, which a lot of people think is the best because it's not too overpowered. | ||
| It's still got the wide body. | ||
| But I look at the interior, I go, this is a nice interior, man. | ||
| It's not like it used to be. | ||
| It used to be the car's fast as fuck, but the seats are wonky. | ||
| And there's nothing in it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nothing! | |
| You have a two-spoke steering wheel that you can actually bend it. | ||
| Those cars were terrible. | ||
| I just noticed, are these fake clouds in the air? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What's the point? | |
| What they are is these lights that used to have clear covers, and instead we got this thing from Octolights, and they're a company that makes, it's like a photograph of clouds that you could see through. | ||
| So we put it over the top of the light itself. | ||
| Did Octomom start that? | ||
| Octolights. | ||
| Oh, gotcha. | ||
| There's only six lights in here, not eight. | ||
| Well, in the old place, we had them. | ||
| They were stars. | ||
| But the news place, the lights, these are LED lights. | ||
| They're just not as bright. | ||
| So we had to change it to clouds. | ||
| I've got the new Rolls with the star. | ||
| Oh, you have that? | ||
| Yeah, I've got a Wraith. | ||
| And it's got the shooting star every once in a while. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yeah, so a lot of people don't know that the star pattern that they put in the headliner in the car... | ||
| Is the exact star pattern from, I guess, the original factory or whatever. | ||
| Oh, wow. | ||
| And, you know, what have you. | ||
| But... | ||
| Unbelievable. | ||
| You're riding along, you got stars above you. | ||
| It's freaking rad. | ||
| Yeah, my neighbor has one of those. | ||
| That car is epic. | ||
| It's an epic. | ||
| He's got the Wraith, the two-door? | ||
| He's got the four-door. | ||
| Nah, I got the two-door. | ||
| But you get in it and you go, this car is preposterous. | ||
| It's so quiet. | ||
| It's like you're barely connected to the outside world. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| Starlight Rage. | ||
| Those suicide doors? | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| Look at that fucking ceiling, man. | ||
| You're barely connected to the world. | ||
| Barely. | ||
| You barely pay attention. | ||
| Oh, I jump in there and my poodle, Fifi, jumps in. | ||
| I got a standard black poodle, this big girl. | ||
| And she jumps in there and just rides around, looking at people. | ||
| Didn't they develop poodles for some specific hunting reason? | ||
| Yeah, they were hunters. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, people think of poodles, they think of poodles as like a rich person, a Beverly Hills dog. | ||
| The Bel Air poodles. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, they were bred as hunters and what have you. | ||
| As a matter of fact, mine, I call her Fifi, that's her name, and she brought a rabbit in one night. | ||
| She comes to bed, I'm laying there, and I'm like, what is she messing with? | ||
| So I reach down in the dark and... | ||
| Pull up this rabbit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm like, what the frick? | |
| But they softmouth them. | ||
| It's in their genes. | ||
| They don't kill them. | ||
| They bring them to the master as a shine of respect, a show of respect, plus they don't kill it. | ||
| So she brought a live rabbit into my bed. | ||
| That rabbit must have been having a tough day. | ||
| Oh, dude, but it went all freaking possum on you. | ||
| It just laid there. | ||
| And I carried it out, put it down. | ||
| Did it run away, eventually? | ||
| About ten minutes is what it took it to come out of frozen state. | ||
| I mean, it just got ate by a poodle and brought into bed with me. | ||
| It probably feels like as long as it's alive, just go with this. | ||
| Just go limp and hope you're just a toy. | ||
| Just hope it happens. | ||
| Yeah, that's the good thing about... | ||
| Phoebe's got her own Instagram. | ||
| She's doing well. | ||
| Oh, nice. | ||
| Yeah, she's always showing off. | ||
| Domestic dogs, right? | ||
| Like, they don't need to eat. | ||
| They don't need to kill you to eat. | ||
| So they're only grabbing you. | ||
| So rabbits are probably like, just keep it together and he'll just eventually get bored. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| He doesn't really want to eat you. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| It's a poodle. | ||
| What? | ||
| 1649. Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| It's an engraving of it. | ||
| How about in 1649? | ||
| They already fucked dogs up to that point. | ||
| Because all dogs come from wolves. | ||
| There's Phoebe right there. | ||
| One of the weirdest stories that came out of genetics is understanding that all dogs came from wolves. | ||
| They didn't think that, I think. | ||
| I'm pretty sure they thought that all dogs were like a combination of a bunch of different things, like wild dogs and different things that eventually became like a mastiff or something. | ||
| But now they realize, no, Every single dog, from a Chihuahua to a Great Dane, comes from a wolf. | ||
| Yeah, but, I mean, there's some dogs that, what do you do with them? | ||
| I mean, you've got a 150-pound Mastiff that just lays there and slobbers. | ||
| I had a 140-pound Mastiff. | ||
| He lived to be 13 years old. | ||
| He was awesome. | ||
| He's a great dog. | ||
| No, they're great dogs, but they're just there. | ||
| And they're huge. | ||
| They're smart and they're big. | ||
| And I don't like take, I don't mind, I mean, especially here in California, you've got to pick up the dog's crap. | ||
| But, you don't in Texas? | ||
| I don't want to pick up a crap that's bigger than mine. | ||
| In Texas, you find dogs that you just shoot at. | ||
| No, you gotta pick it up. | ||
| It's everywhere. | ||
| There's people walking along, and that just cracks me up. | ||
| I'm like, I'm gonna follow this giant animal around and pick up its shit. | ||
| That's the least of your worries. | ||
| The real problem is it doesn't understand how big it is, and it knocks people down stairs and shit. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| You gotta be real careful. | ||
| If you have steep stairs and a big dog, you have to really train that motherfucker correctly. | ||
| You gotta let him know, hey, you can't jump on the four-year-old at the top stair, you fucking dummy. | ||
| But he's a dog. | ||
| He just loves you. | ||
| They love you. | ||
| You get big dogs. | ||
| Like my friend Johnny Cash was my dog. | ||
| And my friend Joe sold him to me. | ||
| And he was a trainer of dogs for movies and shit. | ||
| You know the movie The Incredible Hulk? | ||
| The one with Eric Bana, when Nick Nolte plays his dad, and Nick Nolte's the bad guy, and he's like a scientist, and he sticks the Hulk serum into these dogs, and he turns these dogs into these big, giant, hulking mastiffs. | ||
| Well, the original dog was actually my friend's dog, and he was a trainer of these dogs, and he brought him to Fear Factor. | ||
| And on Fear Factor, these dogs were just laying around, like, super chill. | ||
| Like... | ||
| That's the cartoon dog, but there was like a real dog before that. | ||
| The dog was... | ||
| He's a Regency Mastiff, and his name was Curly. | ||
| So, anyway, this guy, he developed these, he raised these dogs and made them to, he bred them to this place where they just had no aggression. | ||
| No aggression to dogs, no aggression to people. | ||
| This dog was like a hulk, just a giant mass of muscle. | ||
| But you can come up to it, anybody can come up to him. | ||
| Pet it, little kids were petting it, and he was like gently kissing their face. | ||
| He was the sweetheart of sweethearts. | ||
| What kind of place do we run in here? | ||
| You only got one more? | ||
| We got more people out there. | ||
| I'm good. | ||
| But anyway, he's a big dog, but he's a super sweetheart. | ||
| It's all about, like, breeders. | ||
| Like, how they breed them. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. | ||
| What kind of dogs do you have? | ||
| Just Fifi, the poodle. | ||
| Standard poodle. | ||
| How much does Fifi weigh? | ||
| Probably 60. It's a reasonable shit. | ||
| You're cleaning up a reasonable handful. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Several times a day. | ||
| It's like, if you have, like, an English Mastiff... | ||
| No, you don't have the one bag. | ||
| You've got two bags. | ||
| You've got a hunk of shit. | ||
| And then you've got to figure out how to roll this one and roll this one. | ||
| You've got a pot roast of shit that comes out of that animal's asshole every few hours. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| Yeah, those poor fellas and gals don't live very long, though, unfortunately. | ||
| That's what's sad, those really big dogs. | ||
| Like eight, nine years, they're done. | ||
| Mine lived to be 13, which is extraordinary. | ||
| That's pretty old. | ||
| But he was hurt and... | ||
| I had to put him down. | ||
| He couldn't walk. | ||
| I would have to carry him to his food and then carry him back outside so he can go to the bathroom. | ||
| It was bad. | ||
| The trials and tribulations of big dogs. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| Next on the JRE. | ||
| You can tune in on cuntscreener.com. | ||
| That might be one of the greatest things that's ever happened in the history of this show. | ||
| Is cuntscreener.com trending yet? | ||
| For sure. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| And people are going to be mad at us. | ||
| Why did you have to use a derogatory term for a month's vagina? | ||
| Why can't it be a dick screener? | ||
| These guys are dicks. | ||
| They're assholes. | ||
| Dicks and assholes. | ||
| And yet you chose cunt. | ||
| Well, we were thinking about manhole, but it's the same. | ||
| Yeah, well... | ||
| Australia has the proper use of the word cunt. | ||
| There's too much reverence to that word in America. | ||
| People get confused about it. | ||
| In Australia, they just throw that bitch around like it's a beach ball. | ||
| Oh yeah, they do. | ||
| I've had some Australians on my show, yeah. | ||
| I'm from Texas, I'm like, holy shit, he's saying that word a lot. | ||
| Hey, these fucking cunts. | ||
| He's a good cunt. | ||
| That's my favorite. | ||
| He's a good cunt. | ||
| He's a good cunt. | ||
| And they mean that you might as well be replacing the word cunt for dude. | ||
| Because it's all about intent. | ||
| To them, it's basically saying, hey, he's a good dude. | ||
| He's a good dude. | ||
| And they're saying, he's a good kind. | ||
| There you go. | ||
| It's not bad. | ||
| I've got to have a set of these. | ||
| Not steal those. | ||
| This is Plasticell. | ||
| They're a company that they make these one-off little dolls. | ||
| You touched it, you've got to pour it. | ||
| These are hand-painted. | ||
| No kidding. | ||
| Yeah, this guy's a beast, man. | ||
| Plasticel on Instagram. | ||
| He makes all this stuff. | ||
| That's pretty rad. | ||
| No, he's wicked. | ||
| He made one for my dog. | ||
| He did John Wick and his dog, too. | ||
| Oh, he did John Wick and his dog. | ||
| That's from John Wick. | ||
| Dose. | ||
| Not John Rick Uno. | ||
| Don't get him twisted. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Here we go. | |
| Now you have to couch surf tonight. | ||
| Maybe it was from John Wick 1. No, it was. | ||
| I'm wrong. | ||
| It was from John Wick 1 that he had the pit bull. | ||
| Yeah, it was. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, John Wick 2, they killed the beagle, and then he had the pit bull. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And they started going and killing Spree. | ||
| Doesn't he have a 3 out now? | ||
| Is there another one? | ||
| They're working on it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It's coming out soon? | ||
| Yeah, he's a cool cat. | ||
| I ran into him at Deus Ex Machina down in Santa Monica, Venice area, and he was on one of his bikes. | ||
| Super cool, rad dude. | ||
| Just, hey, what's up, man? | ||
| Keanu Reeves must be one of the nicest, coolest people on the planet, because no one has a bad word to say about that guy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Never. | |
| Ever. | ||
| He might be what we should all aspire to be. | ||
| We should all aspire to be Keanu Reeves. | ||
| Or he might have some really crazy secrets. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No! | |
| I don't know. | ||
| I bet he's the nicest. | ||
| It seems like everybody runs into him. | ||
| I'm sure there's some people that ran into you where they caught you the wrong way and it all went sideways for a little bit. | ||
| Nah, not really. | ||
| I mean... | ||
| Fucking Keanu Reeves! | ||
| You got it going on. | ||
| But the point what I was going to get to is one of the things that those movies did was they elevated the profile of those muscle cars. | ||
| Because people saw that movie and they went, this guy... | ||
| There's something about him. | ||
| I know he's murdering people. | ||
| I know he's the best at murdering people. | ||
| I know he killed three guys in a bar with a pencil. | ||
| I know that. | ||
| But look how fucking cool he looks. | ||
| He's got the dopest suits. | ||
| He's killing people. | ||
| He's not killing people in an Under Armour rash guard, okay? | ||
| He's killing people in the dopest suits. | ||
| He's stabbing people in the neck. | ||
| And he's driving a 70 Chevelle SS. But the trick is, unlike your aforementioned and loved Eleanor, it wasn't plasticized. | ||
| It was a real freaking muscle car. | ||
| It didn't have shit hanging all over it and extra side pipes. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| You're right. | ||
| But you're also wrong. | ||
| Because Eleanor, look at that. | ||
| God damn it. | ||
| If I'm going to kill somebody, I'm doing it just like that. | ||
| God! | ||
| Come on. | ||
| He's got Kragers on it. | ||
| A Chevelle SS from 1970 with Kragers. | ||
| It's torque press. | ||
| American torque press. | ||
| Are they? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Look how good he looks. | ||
| That Kragers style. | ||
| That's a classic white wall tire. | ||
| I mean, come on, man. | ||
| Or white letter tire. | ||
| Raised white letters. | ||
| Come on, that's classic. | ||
| You know you can get your own now? | ||
| You can get your name on it? | ||
| You can do anything. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There's a thing that sells like these stickers. | |
| Gas monkey tires. | ||
| I should, but you can actually order stickers now that are the rubber letters that fuse themselves into the rubber on your tire, so you end up with a white letter like that, and you can put anything on there. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Like Joe Rogan or, you know, CuntScreen.com. | ||
| For sure someone's going to send you and me photos of their car, a 1970 Chevelle, rolling around with cuntscreener.com. | ||
| Oh no, the company that does it's going to send us sets for our cars. | ||
| I don't think... | ||
| I don't think they'll let you in the golf course with that shit after the burrito incident. | ||
| I guarantee you they'll make it on small little golf cart tires, too. | ||
| I need a set of tiring for a 10-inch wheel. | ||
| Yeah, I need a smaller font, please. | ||
| I'm trying to fix this electric golf cart. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Oh, I've got a golf cart I drive in my neighborhood that's insane. | ||
| It's a Polaris, like, four-seater with the little truck bed. | ||
| And I drive it all around my neighborhood because I've got a nice little neighborhood. | ||
| I can get to the grocery store. | ||
| I get to get something to eat. | ||
| I get to go to the bar or whatever. | ||
| So I race total hell with this thing. | ||
| I drive through people's yards. | ||
| I'm a great neighbor because I'm really fun, and if I do absolutely fuck something up, I will definitely pay for it. | ||
| But at the same time, they're like, okay, does it have to have 32,000 speakers on it and a 50-inch television screen? | ||
| White wall tires don't exist. | ||
| What happened to white wall tires? | ||
| But they only exist on classic cars. | ||
| Oh yeah, you're not going to see them on anything new. | ||
| What happened? | ||
| The lettered tires are starting to get more popular with brand new ones, but the whitewall? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Remember the four or five inch whitewall? | ||
| Alright, I'm going to talk to you about a polarizing issue. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Ready? | ||
| I'm ready. | ||
| Raw welt Porsches. | ||
| I have no idea what you're talking about. | ||
| You don't know what I'm talking about? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Those wide body, weird, Japanese style... | ||
| Body kits they put on old Porsches. | ||
| Was it like Liberty Walk shit? | ||
| Giant, wide-ass bodies. | ||
| R-A... You got it? | ||
| I don't know anything about this. | ||
| Here it is. | ||
| R-A-U-H-W-E-L-T. How the fuck do you not know about this? | ||
| Because I can't afford collaboration. | ||
| But no, these are old cars. | ||
| These are not the most expensive cars in the world. | ||
| Well, that's an old accordion bumper that's been smoothed out. | ||
| So it's like 78, 79. But you see the bolt-on bumpers, or excuse me, the bolt-on fender flares? | ||
| I like that. | ||
| The rear and the front, yeah. | ||
| Well, there's a gentleman out of Japan. | ||
| and he does all of these raw welt cars by hand and uh go to him um what is the the guy's name so i could uh give the guy his props but that dude right there with the i love rw t-shirt on he's uh his name is akira nakai and he all raw welt cars he does himself so he'll fly out from japan he sawzalls your fenders off Puts these flares on the front and the rear. | ||
| There's some amazing videos of him. | ||
| Because he's a real character. | ||
| He's chain smoking cigarettes the entire time. | ||
| And he's like measuring this shit. | ||
| He does it all by hand. | ||
| He lays the caulking around the edge by hand. | ||
| The weather sealing. | ||
| That's the guy right there. | ||
| I'm going out on a limb then. | ||
| I'm going to invite him to come to Texas and do my wraith. | ||
| I wonder if he does anything other than Porsches. | ||
| Well, I've been considering doing a wide body on my Wraith just for the hell of it, and I would let him come do it. | ||
| If he would be interested in it, that would be an amazing episode. | ||
| But if you wanted to just do what he does and get a Porsche, that's kind of his style. | ||
| He takes these things and makes them fucking cartoonish wide. | ||
| Look how wide that motherfucker is. | ||
| That just cracks me up. | ||
| You're dealing with like 20-inch tires. | ||
| That's freaking super cool. | ||
| They're outstanding. | ||
| My deal with Gas Monkey, you say, okay, well, I could actually tell you. | ||
| Yeah, we can do that. | ||
| But I'm like, this guy's known for it. | ||
| Bring his ass in. | ||
| Let's have some fun. | ||
| Let's watch his talent. | ||
| I got a situation I'll set up for you. | ||
| Look at that green Porsche right there. | ||
| That's what I need. | ||
| Rutledge from Top Gear. | ||
| You know Rutledge Wood? | ||
| I know the name. | ||
| He's a nice guy. | ||
| Super nice guy. | ||
| He's been on this podcast before. | ||
| He's doing one of those cars, and he's doing it with an LS swap. | ||
| So instead of using an air-cooled engine... | ||
| We already did it. | ||
| Oh, you already did that? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Damn. | ||
| It's a good move. | ||
| Why is it so prohibitive? | ||
| Oh, I don't know. | ||
| It's Porsche people, you know. | ||
| They're crazy. | ||
| The Seinfelds of the world, and God bless you, Seinfeld. | ||
| They're like, oh, it's not original. | ||
| Purists. | ||
| We did a 996, like a 2000, 2001 convertible, and did the LS swap. | ||
| And we finished that in late 2016, and I had a brand new 2017 911 Turbo S in the Signal Green. | ||
| And if I didn't mess with the buttons, if I didn't turn off all the stuff, I could not get away from that car until about 140 miles an hour. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa. | |
| Couldn't get away. | ||
| Look at this thing. | ||
| That's ours. | ||
| That's ours. | ||
| This is it. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Good lord. | ||
| Oh, we went freaking... | ||
| Oh, you changed the headlights, too. | ||
| So 996, you went with a 997 headlight? | ||
| Yep. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That car was so freaking rad. | |
| Yeah, and it is. | ||
| Oh, and you went with 911 GT3, the front, where the bumper is, the open vents. | ||
| Oh my goodness. | ||
| Car was freaking great. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How dare you. | |
| Really teared it up. | ||
| That's beautiful. | ||
| Where is it? | ||
| A friend of mine owns it. | ||
| I told him, I said, you can buy the car, but if you ever sell it, you got to ask me first. | ||
| Dude, fuck him. | ||
| I know, right? | ||
| Fuck him for owning that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck Tony. | |
| Tony, you suck. | ||
| You have that car. | ||
| The thing about those cars, it's so weird that you're not allowed to do that. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| That was three years ago, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh my goodness. | |
| Again, put that right next to the Mustang Mach 1. It's not better. | ||
| It's just different. | ||
| They're both fucking incredible. | ||
| They both have the same reaction. | ||
| That car, which is a 2000... | ||
| One? | ||
| That was like a zero or a one, yeah. | ||
| That car, the way it's modified, the way it's put together, it is so fucking pretty. | ||
| If you had that next in that 69 Mach 1, it's just different tastes. | ||
| It's a different feel, but that's a fucking amazing car. | ||
| And maybe in the future, you might look at that one even better when you consider it a performance. | ||
| That's my other car, a tuner we built down there, the 280Z, the green one. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ooh. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I always wanted a 240. That's a 280 with 13,000 original miles, and we went nuts with that and did the whole Lexus swap, F22Js, whatever. | ||
| White leather tires. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Bringing them back. | ||
| That car was cool. | ||
| Nitto tires. | ||
| I sold it to a customer, no bullshit, for a pretty amazing amount of money for a 280Z. And it was being shipped, and the truck burned to the fucking ground. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh! | |
| Yeah. | ||
| What happened? | ||
| Who knows? | ||
| But the whole trailer burned to the ground. | ||
| Well, you know how there's been these fires out here? | ||
| No, this is in the Northeast, but still. | ||
| Do you know about California? | ||
| California's had some pretty crazy fires. | ||
| There's a guy up the street that had a really nice 3 Series BMW. Burnt to the ground. | ||
| It's still sitting there. | ||
| I took pictures of it. | ||
| I put it on my Instagram. | ||
| You need to call me. | ||
| Here's what I think we do, because there have been some really amazing cars that have burned with the fires that happened this past year. | ||
| The panels are still good, though. | ||
| Don't worry about the panels. | ||
| We take them. | ||
| I need to make you this for in here, this conference table. | ||
| You take it and... | ||
| Yeah, that's from my neighborhood. | ||
| Okay, so you take the real special car that burned down, you blow everything out, you clear coat it so it doesn't stink and what have you. | ||
| We put a glass top on it and you have a conference table called burning up the competition. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ooh. | |
| You know, or whatever. | ||
| But I think some of those really expensive burned out cars would make really cool conference tables. | ||
| Yeah, good art projects. | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| In your background. | ||
| You got lucky, bitch. | ||
| Just having a big plaque. | ||
| You could have been me. | ||
| You got lucky, bitch. | ||
| You weren't in the wrong place at the wrong time. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm a big fan of those E46 M3s, those 2000-ish... | ||
| I do not know my... | ||
| You don't know, German? | ||
| God damn it, Richard. | ||
| How dare you? | ||
| Dude, I'm an American hot rodder. | ||
| Custom silver E46 M3. See, he was saying so many numbers, I was worried he were baiting me to see if I'd like... | ||
| Yeah, those are cool. | ||
| There was no E46 M3. No, E46 is like, it's a super well-balanced, 50-50 balanced car from like 2002, 2003. And many people think it's like the gold standard for M3s. | ||
| Because M3s, there's something that happened to M3s. | ||
| And right now, I like the fact that an M3 became an M4. Like, stay right there. | ||
| Don't move. | ||
| M3, that's a fucking good looking car because an M4 is a totally different thing than an M3. It's beautiful and it's amazing. | ||
| Like an M4 from BMW is an amazing driver. | ||
| Like if you want to drive that car every day, you'll be super pleased. | ||
| The performance is unprecedented in the M world and most of the car world. | ||
| The only things that are faster are like fucking GTRs and Corvettes that are ZR1s or 06s or shit, but... | ||
| It's different, because an M3 was really light. | ||
| It was really light and uncomplicated. | ||
| There wasn't any traction control, or if there was, it was minimal. | ||
| Mostly it was just anti-lock brakes. | ||
| And it was, you know, a 3,000-pound car. | ||
| And it had 333 horsepower and is perfectly balanced for the right amount of thrust, the right amount of grip with the tires, because they weren't the widest tires, but they were wide enough. | ||
| They had a little bit of fender flare. | ||
| They made them wider than the standard 3 Series. | ||
| And it's just a perfect, understated-looking car. | ||
| When you look at that E46 M3, you look at that car, you're like, that's a fucking good neutral zone. | ||
| Like, they nailed it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Cool. | |
| If anybody has one of those, I'm buying... | ||
| You can reach me at CassMucky.com. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I sell it? | |
| Did I sell it? | ||
| I sold it, right? | ||
| Well, what we do is we buy like 10 or 20 of them. | ||
| Then we sell one at auction for like 15 times what they normally bring and then we sell the rest of them. | ||
| But look at that car. | ||
| That's pretty damn good. | ||
| It's a good car. | ||
| You want... | ||
| There's a balance to that car. | ||
| It's not like a Ferrari 488 or some shit like that where it's so outrageous everybody gets light. | ||
| Now, see, you got me there because I don't like rear engines. | ||
| Oh, you don't? | ||
| Not in the Ferrari type stuff, because to me, if you've got a front-engine B12, you're a connoisseur. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| If you've got one behind you, then you just got a contract of some sort, and you might not have that car next week. | ||
| Look at that car. | ||
| Alright, do you own one? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| I think I need to. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Alright, cool. | |
| I need an E46 M3 in my life. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| It's perfectly understated and yet flashy. | ||
| It's like a balance of things. | ||
| So what's the value on that right now? | ||
| Because I'm serious, I don't watch that kind of car. | ||
| They're not crazy. | ||
| They're not crazy. | ||
| Because I think people overlook them. | ||
| They overlook them for more extravagant, like E92 M3s, which is like the V8 ears. | ||
| So if you could buy one, what would you pay for one right now? | ||
| I don't I mean, just a nice California one, no rust. | ||
| I have brain damage, so I have critical thinking skills. | ||
| See, I don't know. | ||
| Off. | ||
| I'd have to call my buddy Dennis on something like that, because I just don't know those kind of cars. | ||
| There's something about that car that's very appealing, because it's a balance issue. | ||
| It's not, like, there's something about the Mach 1 that's like, holy shit, you know, like, America! | ||
| Fuck yeah! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah! | |
| So here's what we do. | ||
| We put it out to the people listening. | ||
| Bring us a nice one-owner, low-mile M3 that hasn't been ragged out. | ||
| E56? E46. E46 M3 that hasn't been ragged out. | ||
| And I'll bid against you and we'll see who gets it. | ||
| I had two M3s in a row, at least two M3s in a row from BMW for the V8 years, because it was so good. | ||
| It was my daily driver. | ||
| It was so good. | ||
| After I would get out of it, I was like, this car has everything I like. | ||
| It's understated, and yet it's wicked. | ||
| It's got V8 power, but yet it's not preposterous, like the wheels don't break loose every time you hit the gas. | ||
| It has a double-clutch transmission, so it's good in traffic, and it also has a whale, because it's got this high-revving V8, and it's so many things that I like. | ||
| I got two of them in a row. | ||
| So they're gonna send us one on the old interwebs. | ||
| They're not gonna send us shit. | ||
| BMW? I got a pretty good reach. | ||
| I think I can get out there. | ||
| You can get ahold of BMW? No, I can get ahold of the people that own one in their garage right now that are probably at their golf club. | ||
| So we'll just bid against each other to see who gets it. | ||
| Because I don't know what they're worth. | ||
| Well, how about I let you get it and I'll just buy a different one. | ||
| I'm not stupid, bro. | ||
| How about we do this? | ||
| Let's buy two of them and race. | ||
| I'm not good at racing. | ||
| Straight line? | ||
| Round line? | ||
| Curves? | ||
| See, I don't care who gets there first. | ||
| I just like driving. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No bullshit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No bullshit. | |
| I heard that from your wife. | ||
| You son of a bitch But for real I like watching racing But I really don't care if you get there first All I care is about going sideways and correcting and hitting the turn at the proper apex and stomping on the gas and knowing when to break and knowing when to dig in. | ||
| If you get ahead of me, I don't give a fuck. | ||
| I really don't. | ||
| I'm just trying to have fun because I'm not a professional racer. | ||
| If that's all I wanted to do, if I was Danica Patrick, then that's what I'd be into. | ||
| But I'm not. | ||
| I really just like driving cars. | ||
| Yeah, me too. | ||
| I'm not a racer at all. | ||
| If you and I drove, I would let you win because I like you. | ||
| Oh, come on. | ||
| Yeah, and I'd let you win because I like you. | ||
| So we're just going to be sitting at the starting line drinking beer. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| 2001 E46 M3. Whoa. | ||
| Oh, and it's convertible. | ||
| I don't want a convertible. | ||
| Yeah, I think that if you're going to drive a car, then you don't want a convertible. | ||
| I have one convertible. | ||
| Find us a hard time. | ||
| I have a 1965 convertible. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We'll buy it. | |
| Hey, let's find one on there and I'll buy it right now. | ||
| We'll call the guy. | ||
| I know a guy who's selling one of those. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Here you go. | |
| What, do you got one? | ||
| 8500? | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| E46 Coupe. | ||
| Six speed. | ||
| Low miles. | ||
| 13,900. | ||
| You can't even buy a 69 Mach 1 for anywhere near that. | ||
| Not even near that. | ||
| That's a good car, too. | ||
| I would love that car. | ||
| Got some stereo. | ||
| He keeps it covered. | ||
| I'm a fan. | ||
| I just think that there's some years that people are sleeping on. | ||
| How far is Palos Verdes? | ||
| Super close. | ||
| Okay, if he could be here in the next 20 minutes before we get it done, or however long. | ||
| Not that close. | ||
| It's basically at Long Beach. | ||
| It's like an hour and a half. | ||
| Fucking hell, Long Beach from here is like four hours. | ||
| At 3 p.m., it's four hours. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What sad is that? | ||
| What do they got in Long Beach? | ||
| Nothing. | ||
| Just last, Snoop Dogg. | ||
| The Queen Elizabeth whatever, or the Queen Mary. | ||
| The Queen Mary, yeah. | ||
| There's a laugh factory down there in Long Beach. | ||
| There's a lot of things in Long Beach. | ||
| See, I've always wanted to try comedy. | ||
| Really? | ||
| I just... | ||
| You want to try it tonight? | ||
| No. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| I'm not exactly prepared. | ||
| I can make it happen. | ||
| I just don't know how. | ||
| I mean, I know that it's a very rigid process, and you have to really refine. | ||
| And I've looked at it, I've studied it, and I'm like, I think I could probably try that one day. | ||
| You're a funny dude. | ||
| I think you could do it. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| No bullshit. | ||
| You 100% could be a comedian. | ||
| I need to go to comedian school. | ||
| It doesn't exist. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This is what you've got to do. | ||
| You've got to make friends with professional comedians who'll be honest with you. | ||
| One of the beautiful things about comedy is that it's very much a brothership and a sisterhood. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| I've seen it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's a brotherhood and a sisterhood that exist with comedies. | ||
| There's no institutions. | ||
| Even though it's like one of the favorite things of people, people love to laugh. | ||
| It's one of the rare things that gives you a very specific reaction. | ||
| Like, if you go to see a movie and it's like a rock movie, like Jumanji or something, it's fun, sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's exciting, but there's a bunch of shit going on. | ||
| You go to see stand-up, you go to see Kevin Hart do stand-up, you're going there because Kevin Hart is a drug dealer, okay? | ||
| That drug is laughter. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He's here to hit you with some fucking high-level, gigantic arena laughter, and you gotta walk out of there going, holy shit, that was fun. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Woo! | |
| Like he gave you some drugs. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| I think I might try one day. | ||
| You can do it. | ||
| Maybe I'll give it a shot. | ||
| I get an open mic. | ||
| Go out there and go, hey, I'm Richard from cuntscreener.com. | ||
| You can do it. | ||
| There's a lot of places. | ||
| Addison Improv, good spot. | ||
| Yeah, Addison Improv's great. | ||
| It's a great spot. | ||
| Not only is that great, right next door is the Kobe Steakhouse. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| And you can get all the chop-chop. | ||
| And if you get hammered, you can go to that piano bar. | ||
| Is that piano bar still there? | ||
| Piano bar's still there, but right next to Kobe is the Memphis. | ||
| It's a lounge, Memphis Lounge, and that's always a good time. | ||
| I've met a few of my wives there. | ||
| I've worked there many times. | ||
| That's a fun place to work. | ||
| I used to love to do that circuit. | ||
| What I would do is Cap City in Austin, and I would do the improv. | ||
| Well, there is an improv in Addison, but there's another improv too, right, that I haven't done. | ||
| Is that in Fort Worth? | ||
| I think so. | ||
| I think there's one like 40 minutes away or some shit. | ||
| Yeah, it's like Fort Worth or Bedford or something. | ||
| And then there was a laugh stop in Houston. | ||
| That was the run. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, see, if you come back to Dallas, you need to do Gas Monkey Live. | ||
| I hold about 2,000-something people. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| You have a concert place? | ||
| Yeah, I've had Motley Crue there. | ||
| Dude, I graduated high school in 87. Somebody told me two things. | ||
| One, you're going to build a car that Hot Wheels is going to make. | ||
| And two, you're going to have Motley Crue at your bar. | ||
| I'm like, no way. | ||
| That's incredible! | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| So is this the place that you were building on your show? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| Do you have a 2000 seat place there? | ||
| Yeah, I think we're 22... | ||
| Look at the fucking size of that place! | ||
| Holy shit! | ||
| What's really bitching about this is the stage is solid concrete. | ||
| It's not raised. | ||
| So the reverb and the sound that we get out of there, even the guys from Crew, when they played, it was a deal with Dodge and me and them and Baugh. | ||
| They were supposed to come in and play like 41 minutes or something, and they played for like an hour and a half, and we're like, we hadn't played anything like this in decades, and the sound is fucking insane. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| That is so cool. | ||
| Dude, you're like an uber businessman. | ||
| You just dip your toes in everything. | ||
| I call myself an entrepreneur, because I've always put my hands in the shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| So yeah, right across the street. | ||
| I mean, you got a restaurant, bar, you're making cars, doing television. | ||
| Live music venues. | ||
| That's the live music venues, yeah. | ||
| We're doing energy drink, Gas Monkey Energy. | ||
| Tequila. | ||
| Killing it. | ||
| We're in every 7-Eleven in the U.S. What? | ||
| With Gas Monkey Energy. | ||
| It's a better energy drink. | ||
| It's powered with all kinds of B vitamins and our sugar. | ||
| We use real honey. | ||
| It's a better deal all the way around. | ||
| Wow, you get it from slave bees. | ||
| Yeah, well, I didn't know there was any other kind. | ||
| Crack the whip. | ||
| Get in the box, B! I had a bit about that, about how you're a vegan. | ||
| One of the most crazy things about being a vegan is you can't eat honey. | ||
| Did you know that? | ||
| Honey's probably the oldest substance. | ||
| For nutrition in the world. | ||
| It's one of them. | ||
| It's definitely in the top million. | ||
| But these bees are not like your slaves. | ||
| You can't just force them to make honey. | ||
| Yeah, you can. | ||
| You stick them in the box. | ||
| They don't care. | ||
| They don't even know what's going on. | ||
| Do you think there's any honey bee trafficking going on? | ||
| Yes, for sure. | ||
| And it's awful. | ||
| It needs to stop, and it's mostly by white people. | ||
| I was leaving L.A. the other day, and this lady had like 24 eggs, and they were scanning them. | ||
| Well, you never know. | ||
| Who carries eggs? | ||
| They make fake eggs. | ||
| They do, and you could put drugs in that fake egg. | ||
| It's not bullshit. | ||
| It really is. | ||
| Look, if you're a drug dealer and you're making millions of dollars off cocaine, an egg of coke, imagine how fucking valuable an egg filled with coke would be. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like a rock of coke that big? | ||
| Take a guess, Jamie. | ||
| How about like an ostrich egg filled with coke? | ||
| I'm sure you can Google that. | ||
| Ostrich egg full of coke. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's a million dollars. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| A good goose egg? | ||
| I haven't done anything like that since I was a really, really small child. | ||
| Ostrich egg filled with coke. | ||
| Google that. | ||
| Don't be scared. | ||
| It probably comes up. | ||
| That's the problem with Google. | ||
| You're sitting there thinking with your buddy or shooting the shit, and you're like, oh, I just thought of something really cool, and you Google it, and you're like, ah, fucked up. | ||
| It's probably someone getting arrested for having it up their ass. | ||
| Did you see that CIA spy kit where they had to stick it up their ass? | ||
| Fugitive ostrich farm fraudster Martin Evans extradited... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Told you! | |
| It's there! | ||
| Does that guy have an ostrich egg up his ass? | ||
| Is that what you're saying? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Johannesburg! | |
| He was doing drug dealing with ostriches or something. | ||
| Oh! | ||
| How did he get the drugs in the ostrich? | ||
| Through his... | ||
| It would be beak, not nostrils. | ||
| Well, they have nostrils. | ||
| They're weird, man. | ||
| Well, no, I knew a guy... | ||
| You know, I've done a lot of the world rallies and... | ||
| The gumball 3000s and the bull runs and all this. | ||
| So one guy appeared on the scene for a few years and it was kind of weird. | ||
| He was like there but he wasn't there and he was kind of not really competing but he had all these expensive cars. | ||
| Turns out that that's all he'd been doing for four or five years was shipping these cars from town to town on regular shipping trucks full of trucks. | ||
| Who's gonna search a Lamborghini Murcielago? | ||
| Right. | ||
| You would just assume he's there for the gumball rally. | ||
| Yeah! | ||
| Meanwhile, he's a dope dealer. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Now that guy, I think he's in the jail now. | ||
| One of the things about cars, right, is that cars, they, they, uh, Men's baser instincts respond to cars. | ||
| Something about a Lamborghini. | ||
| There's something about those cars. | ||
| You want to slightly escape from society's constraints. | ||
| Oh yeah, but I'm not a fan with those cars. | ||
| I do it with the old cars. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I like the old shit. | ||
| I mean, I have some big stuff. | ||
| Don't get me wrong. | ||
| I'm not a new fan of the Murcielagos either. | ||
| It's just something about them. | ||
| You can't see out of them. | ||
| Well, they're so weird. | ||
| It's so wide and big and crazy. | ||
| You can't see. | ||
| You can't get in and out. | ||
| I mean, it's so I'm rich too. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Every now and then on Sunset, in front of the Comedy Store, you see these guys... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Horrible. | |
| Flying by the Comedy Store, and the cars are like five fucking miles wide. | ||
| Each car, they're super wide. | ||
| Yeah, and you always know the asshole that doesn't know what he's doing because he's pushing in the clutch and... | ||
| Yeah, but there's no clutch. | ||
| There's no clutch. | ||
| Well, not anymore. | ||
| He's putting it in neutral and doing it. | ||
| It literally doesn't exist anymore. | ||
| These guys that drive around and they're like, you know, look at me. | ||
| And I'm like, dude, just drive this freaking car. | ||
| You don't even get the satisfaction of watching them stall out anymore, though. | ||
| Like someone who doesn't know how to do it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
This is true. | |
| I stalled out in my Bronco the other day, man. | ||
| And I was like, this is for everybody around me that was looking at this car that got jealous. | ||
| That's for you. | ||
| Feel better about yourself. | ||
| I fucking stalled out. | ||
| I'm a loser. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm a loser. | |
| Ah, fuck. | ||
| Everybody had to wait an extra three seconds. | ||
| And they're all like, you fucking loser. | ||
| Nah. | ||
| That's a pretty badass bronco. | ||
| It's a badass bronco. | ||
| But you ever been to La Cienega Boulevard right when it hit sunset? | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| That's a steep-ass hill, bro. | ||
| Yeah, you gotta come around. | ||
| A lot of dudes would manual stall out on that motherfucker. | ||
| Yeah, we started the Gumball 3000 there one time. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| We started on that hill. | ||
| You had to clear that light just to go. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's a good move. | ||
| Dude, they screwed up all the time. | ||
| That's a good move. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They should have never mowed down the House of Blues, though. | ||
| Well, they mowed it down. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What the hell? | |
| Here's the thing. | ||
| I agree with you 100%, but yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| I'm not scared. | ||
| Round number, what is this? | ||
| Six? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| The thing about the House of Blues that was badass, though, when it went away. | ||
| Salute, my friend. | ||
| Yes, sir. | ||
| My new friend. | ||
| Salute. | ||
| You're going to teach me comedy. | ||
| 100% help you out. | ||
| When it was down, when they tore it down, from the comedy store, you could see across and you see all the beautiful lights. | ||
| The lights in the Hollywood Hills, I had a buddy of mine who bought a house off of Doheny, which is way above the hills. | ||
| You'd go to his backyard, he would look out at the lights, he'd be like, This doesn't even seem real. | ||
| It's like a Blade Runner. | ||
| Like, most people see the lights when you're down in them. | ||
| But when you're above Hollywood and you're looking down, it's one of the most spectacular views in all of history. | ||
| It's way better than any New York City view. | ||
| Because you have a view on top. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| That's what you see. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep. | |
| And I'm telling you, man, this is dog shit compared to my friend Larry's house. | ||
| You'd look out there, you'd look at that, and you'd go, holy shit, that's incredible. | ||
| It was mesmerizing. | ||
| The image was stunning. | ||
| That's pretty rad. | ||
| I know a couple people that have houses up there. | ||
| I know Dane Cook's got a crazy house up there. | ||
| Like, a lot of guys have houses up there that look down. | ||
| I've always wanted to meet him. | ||
| He's a rad dude. | ||
| Yeah, he's at the comedy store all the time. | ||
| What was that show he did? | ||
| My Best Friend's Girl or whatever? | ||
| I think it was a movie. | ||
| Yeah, a movie. | ||
| That is probably one of the better movies out there. | ||
| It's pretty fucking hilarious. | ||
| What's your all-time favorite movie? | ||
| If there was one movie... | ||
| Smokey the Bandit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Goddamn. | |
| That's a good call. | ||
| Every time. | ||
| That's a good call. | ||
| And if I had to get in depth and think about it, I might go with Stroker Ace, where the giant smoke tower fell and he goes right under it. | ||
| Because these guys were doing their own stunts. | ||
| That shit was real. | ||
| That wasn't CGI. They were doing it. | ||
| What was that one movie with the girl? | ||
| Her name was Domino. | ||
| He was a detective. | ||
| Was it called Domino? | ||
| I don't remember. | ||
| Was that what it's called? | ||
| Was it called Domino? | ||
| During Cannonball Run when they drove the car into the pool. | ||
| Like the NASCAR looking thing. | ||
| They did that because they were fucking drunk. | ||
| They were loaded. | ||
| And they were partying and the cameras just happened to be rolling. | ||
| That wasn't planned. | ||
| It wasn't part of the script. | ||
| They did it because they thought it was funny. | ||
| What is it called? | ||
| Sharky's Machine. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| Sharky's Machine. | ||
| Goddamn. | ||
| What year is that? | ||
| 81. I was 14 years old. | ||
| I remember watching this movie on TV. I was like, Goddamn, I wish I was Burt Reynolds. | ||
| And the woman who was like his girlfriend. | ||
| Oh my God, she was so hot. | ||
| Look at her. | ||
| Leg warmer days. | ||
| Genetics. | ||
| Yeah, they had leg warmers back then. | ||
| No one had an ass. | ||
| They didn't even figure out asses. | ||
| When did they figure out asses? | ||
| Sir Mix-a-Lot, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| White people were in a daze. | ||
| We didn't even know what an ass was. | ||
| Sir Mix-a-Lot came along and changed the game. | ||
| He came along with Baby Got Back. | ||
| And we were like, wait, wait, wait. | ||
| Oh my god, that is better. | ||
| It was like everybody just got smelling salts under their nose. | ||
| Yeah, and then the Kardashians fucked it up for all of us. | ||
| Everybody woke up. | ||
| They did, but they didn't. | ||
| They'd exploited a hole in the system. | ||
| You know, like Jennifer Lopez had strong ass game way before them, but it was a legit Latina ass game. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| From years of dancing and fucking running upstairs and shit. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Correct. | ||
| Whatever the fuck she did. | ||
| Well, also she's like four foot two. | ||
| Is she? | ||
| Yeah, she's pretty short. | ||
| She's probably five foot one or something. | ||
| She's pretty short. | ||
| Pack it all in a small area. | ||
| You gotta get it in. | ||
| But those movies, man, like Burt Reynolds movies, for whatever, Deliverance doesn't get the respect it deserves. | ||
| That is one of the all-time greatest drama movies of all time. | ||
| I actually have a picture when I was filming with Burt at his house somewhere in my phone. | ||
| I'll never find it. | ||
| But... | ||
| I was in his memorabilia room, which also doubled as his weight room, and there was stuff everywhere. | ||
| And I was texting away. | ||
| I was dealing with a problem. | ||
| And somebody snapped a picture of it. | ||
| And the deliverance canoe is laying up against the wall. | ||
| And there's all these different memorabilia things in there. | ||
| And when I say memorabilia like that, it was like a hoarding room. | ||
| Everything was in there. | ||
| And it was unbelievable. | ||
| It's like the most surreal thing because I'm hammering away and there's like everything behind you. | ||
| Look at that, dude. | ||
| Yeah, here's the other thing about that movie. | ||
| By the way, Burt Reynolds, University of Florida, played football, was a fucking stud. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That movie introduced me to the world of compound bows. | ||
| I didn't even know what a compound bow was until I saw that movie. | ||
| I don't know what a compound bow is now. | ||
| For bow hunting, bro. | ||
| I don't pro hunt, man. | ||
| I know. | ||
| Burt Reynolds. | ||
| Bro Reynolds. | ||
| I was thinking of Bo. | ||
| Bo Jackson is a big bowhunter. | ||
| Bo Jackson, I was going to say, is also a big bowhunter. | ||
| But something about that movie, who was the guy who was getting fucked when they were like, squeal like a pig? | ||
| What was his name? | ||
| The actor? | ||
| Oh, this guy. | ||
| Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. | ||
| Ned Beatty. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| Ned Beatty. | ||
| Goddamn, is that guy a good actor. | ||
| Holy shit, you were so scared for him. | ||
| Well, What's-His-Face did it later on in the movie. | ||
| Who was the other actor that did it in another movie later on? | ||
| Was it Pulp Fiction or... | ||
| Bruce Willis? | ||
| No, he got caught and he's down there and he's like, we're never going to talk about this again, right? | ||
| What was that? | ||
| Fing Rhames in Pulp Fiction. | ||
| Because the gimp came out. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| That was what it was. | ||
| That's right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's right. | |
| We're never going to talk about this. | ||
| This didn't happen. | ||
| Do you think Quentin Tarantino would come on? | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| When he's got that new movie coming out, definitely. | ||
| When's his new movie coming out? | ||
| I think they're either just wrapping, filming it right now, or it's like they're getting close. | ||
| Maybe they just finished. | ||
| On a scale of 1 to 10, how high do you think he's willing to get? | ||
| Blast off. | ||
| Why not? | ||
| Unless he doesn't. | ||
| I don't know that he doesn't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He does. | |
| What else is he going to do? | ||
| Go through life pretending? | ||
| He's probably just coming to talk about movies. | ||
| He loves movies. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Good. | |
| Me too. | ||
| I love his movies. | ||
| It's 310. Should we wrap this bitch up? | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| What do you got? | ||
| I'm trying to see if any of my social crap is flowing in here. | ||
| Don't look at that stuff. | ||
| Well, you know, you might give us something good to talk about. | ||
| You entered into a new dimension of social media within the last three hours. | ||
| I suggest you leave your phone alone much more often. | ||
| I was just checking to see if they gave us anything good to talk about. | ||
| They definitely didn't. | ||
| It's three hours and ten minutes and I'm squeezing my bladder tight. | ||
| Well, how do we end it? | ||
| We just end it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Number seven? | ||
| Definitely. | ||
| Number seven. | ||
| Jihad to everyone. | ||
| Thank you to you all. | ||
| Thanks for everybody for listening to this podcast. | ||
| Gas Monkey Apparel and Clothing. | ||
| GasMonkeyGarage.com. | ||
| GasMonkeyGarage.com. | ||
| The television show. | ||
| Tell them when. | ||
| Fast and Loud on Monday nights coming in June. | ||
| Right now we got Garage Rehab on Tuesday nights. | ||
| Misfit Garage will be coming back out. | ||
| Demolition Theater. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I have a lot of shows on TV. DVR, motherfuckers. | |
| It's your friend. | ||
| Use that DVR. Can they get it on Netflix or anywhere else? | ||
| They can get it anywhere, man. | ||
| Everywhere? | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's like the number one automotive motorcycle thing going on. | |
| Number one, bitches! | ||
| Ah, I love it. | ||
| Hey, I had a great fucking time. | ||
| Thank you, brother. | ||
| That was really, really fun. | ||
| Yes, sir. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| All right. | ||
| Thank you, everybody. |
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