Feb. 1, 2018 - The Joe Rogan Experience
03:06:27
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| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
| Say the story. | ||
|
unidentified
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Say the story. | |
| You did not show up, so I'm flying him out after Luke Rockhold. | ||
| I'm going to do a podcast with him with subtitles in Spanish, and I'm bringing him up here on Friday. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, I've got a company to do it for me in Spanish with subtitles. | ||
| And then I'm going to bring him up here on Friday, and we're going to have a three-way about Cuba and what it was like to wrestle and the whole thing, if you don't mind. | ||
|
unidentified
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Whoa. | |
| I don't know if you'd mind. | ||
| So I'll do mine about subtitles just on Español. | ||
|
unidentified
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Okay. | |
| So no, we will not clash with you. | ||
| Dude, the three of us together would be the greatest podcast ever. | ||
| Yeah, because I can interpret and you would be, would be, it would be a real MMA. You could really talk about Underhooks and Russia. | ||
| Dude, that's a fantastic idea. | ||
| Early training in Cuba and where they shipped them, because they shipped you off when you were a young kid. | ||
|
unidentified
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They do? | |
| That's what a lot of people don't know. | ||
| Yeah, they look at you and they go, uh, Pelotero, you don't have a choice. | ||
| They look at you and they go, and that's it. | ||
| Now they take you to a certain age, or they either send you to Nicaragua or Russia. | ||
| And you train. | ||
| And that's why a lot of Cubans are judokas, because they go to Russia and learn judo. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| So he's going to tell you how they shipped them off. | ||
| And they don't just tell your mom, like, we're taking them tomorrow. | ||
| It's always been interesting to me because the Cubans and the Russians in particular were always thought of as being very technical. | ||
| Really the Russians. | ||
| Russians are super technical. | ||
| That was what a lot of people attributed George St. Pierre's success in wrestling. | ||
| You know, George didn't wrestle in college or in high school, but he trained with a bunch of Russian nationals in Montreal and apparently phenomenal wrestlers. | ||
| They have this incredible wrestling program. | ||
| When you see Nurmagomedov, the way he mauls people inside the octagon, like what in the fuck? | ||
| That is a perfect example of that style of super hard, super technical wrestling. | ||
| They're so good at it. | ||
| There's so many. | ||
| You see Lomachenko used to be a wrestler? | ||
| There's a video of Lomachenko. | ||
| It looks like he's doing sambo. | ||
| It looks like he's got a gi on. | ||
| And it's him and some other cat. | ||
| And he's like 11 years old or something like that. | ||
| So his father put him in everything. | ||
| His father made him... | ||
| You know who Lomachenko is, right? | ||
| Yes, yes, yes. | ||
| One of the best boxers ever. | ||
| Like, literally, one of the most technically beautiful to watch boxers that's ever lived. | ||
| But this guy used to wrestle, too. | ||
| Like, this is... | ||
| I don't think this is it. | ||
| Is it? | ||
| Does him... | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Is this him wrestling with somebody? | ||
| Yeah, this is one now where he can still do this shit. | ||
| This is pretty recent. | ||
| He showed some of his wrestling moves. | ||
| But the other one was him when he was a little boy. | ||
| He's really technical, man. | ||
| He knows how to wrestle. | ||
| This is legit. | ||
| Like when you see the way he's moving his body, he's not faking that. | ||
| He's done that a bunch of times. | ||
| And yeah, this is one when he's a little kid, man. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| It says Greco-Roman wrestling, but they're wearing a gi, so I'm not exactly sure what it is. | ||
| But he gets his kid... | ||
| And gets behind him and sends him for a ride. | ||
| So he's always been an amazing athlete. | ||
| I think there's something to that. | ||
| His father had an idea. | ||
| It's a crazy idea. | ||
| His father took him out of boxing and put him into dance for several years. | ||
| Ukrainian traditional dance style, apparently, they were talking about it. | ||
| One of those HBO shows, for like four years, I think it was the HBO show, but for four years, I think, he just danced. | ||
| Can you imagine that? | ||
| His father's like, you want to learn how to box? | ||
| You got to dance. | ||
| And now, nobody's got footwork. | ||
| Have you ever seen him, Joey? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Have you seen his highlight reel? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
|
unidentified
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It's insane. | |
| Jamie, pull up a Lomachenko highlight reel. | ||
| It's funny you say that, because my daughter goes to ballet, and 80% of the class is Russian. | ||
| So I was thinking about it yesterday. | ||
| I was watching the movements, the last parade movement, and I'm like, Jesus Christ. | ||
| If people did ballet, could you... | ||
| And I was thinking of the GSP. Like, you know me, I'm like, GSP probably fucking does ballet. | ||
| Like, you know what I'm saying? | ||
| That's what people do. | ||
| It's great footwork. | ||
| This guy is the wizard of footwork. | ||
| It's crazy because he's right in front of you, but he's one step ahead of you at every turn. | ||
| He knows what you're going to do right while you're doing it. | ||
| He's moving in a way that you can't move. | ||
| He's in front of you and then he's not. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| He's one of the most technical boxers I've ever seen. | ||
| Just an amazing stylistic achievement, like what he can do with his body. | ||
| His style is totally unique. | ||
| I mean, a lot of guys have done it. | ||
| A lot of guys have moved in and out. | ||
| A lot of guys have done it. | ||
| But he's doing it at such a high level. | ||
| Such a high level that it makes people confused. | ||
| Guys quit in their corner. | ||
| They're like, what in the fuck? | ||
| And I really think a lot of it probably had to do with his father's cross-training. | ||
| And particularly with the dance. | ||
| I mean, think about how effortlessly he goes, like, steps around guys. | ||
| I mean, he's got some incredible control of his feet, but it makes sense that, like, you would learn how to move your feet in a specific way the way you learn how to move your hands in a specific way, right? | ||
| Like, think about a guy like Floyd Mayweather, right? | ||
| His hand combinations with his upper body, they're so precise. | ||
| It's like, da-da-da-da, right? | ||
| But with his legs, is he as precise? | ||
| Is he as precise moving with his legs as it is with his hands, or is he 60% or 70% or 80%? | ||
| Lomachenko is probably... | ||
| Perfectly proportioned for his style with his ability to move but also his ability to box and hit you well. | ||
| He's got both things going on at the same time with next level angles. | ||
| So that's what I was saying to you. | ||
| When you're young in Cuba, they pick you. | ||
| It's not like you wake up and go, I want to be a wrestler. | ||
| No, they look at you and go, you look like you could go wrestle. | ||
| And, like, what I was hearing back from them in the early 70s was, like, they just took you away from your family. | ||
| That was part of your training. | ||
| Then they put you and they go, we had no way you trained in, like, their army. | ||
| Have you talked to y'all about this? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, no, we've discussed what this thing is. | ||
| I already have graphics on the podcast. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| So I figured that I'd put them up and we'll do a podcast in Spanish with fucking subtitles, like an English film, like a Gellini movie, whatever. | ||
| One of those movies people think are unique. | ||
| Okay, here you have it. | ||
| That would be genius. | ||
| Because his English is too rough. | ||
| And I know what he's trying to say and the frustration in his face. | ||
| He's trying to say, I love you! | ||
| Michael Bisping! | ||
| So now he did a tape the other day of him in Cuba waiting for Bisping in Cuba. | ||
| Bisping went to Cuba? | ||
| No. | ||
| Romero's back. | ||
| See if you can find it. | ||
| He's in Cuba, but what is the... | ||
| See if you can find it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Michael Bisping! | |
| I love you! | ||
| He's nuts. | ||
| He's nuts. | ||
| He's fighting Rockhold now. | ||
| Which is a tremendous fight on the 10th, right? | ||
| That's a crazy fight. | ||
| That's a crazy fight. | ||
| Very good fight. | ||
| It's a very good fight. | ||
| Rockhold, when he's on, is super dangerous. | ||
| You know, when Rockhold made one slip up against Bisping... | ||
| But, you know, fair play to Bisping. | ||
| He came into that fight regardless of where anybody ranked him. | ||
| You know, like how they felt his chances were. | ||
| He came in swing. | ||
| He had like, I think he had like 11 days notice. | ||
| Something like that. | ||
| How many days notice did Michael Bisping get when he fought Luke Rockhold? | ||
| I want to say it was something crazy low. | ||
| It wasn't much time. | ||
| You know, Luke Rockhold is very, very good. | ||
| He's a beast. | ||
| Very, very good. | ||
| The top game is insane. | ||
| Let me tell you something. | ||
| I think when he fought Michael Bisbee, I'm not going to lie to you. | ||
| I think his focus was a little off, maybe two in a way. | ||
| I think he was dating rock stars and hanging out in Hollywood. | ||
| I think he's not dating whatever anymore now. | ||
| He's just fucking, you know, when he beat Branch, he looked great. | ||
| But his jujitsu is great. | ||
| He has great kicks. | ||
| He's great with his hands, his movement. | ||
| Him against Yoel is going to be interesting. | ||
| He's got vicious kicks, man. | ||
| No, he's four and he's one, right? | ||
| So, Luke Rockroll is number one at 185 right now? | ||
| I believe so. | ||
| Yeah, I think he's number one contender. | ||
| Is he four? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's a great fight. | ||
| And then you got Jacare's back in the mix. | ||
| Ooh, Jacare. | ||
| You know what's crazy? | ||
| Like, I always say to you, Like, oh, I don't mean to pronounce his name wrong, and then Ungayo, right? | ||
| Like, when he fought Steopik. | ||
| Ungano. | ||
| Ungano, when he fought my man, Immigrant Mentally, like a motherfucker. | ||
| Yeah, he hits hard and all that stuff like that, but now, that dude's still gonna be more dangerous now. | ||
| He's gonna fucking take that loss and come back a fucking machine. | ||
| You've got to think how crazy it is that he went from being a guy who was homeless to five years later fighting for the heavyweight title. | ||
| This is like a total amount of training. | ||
| Five years of MMA training fighting for the heavyweight title. | ||
| And he's the favorite. | ||
|
unidentified
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He's the favorite over a guy who's already defended it twice. | |
| I mean, it's crazy. | ||
| That's how talented he is. | ||
| That's how terrifying he is. | ||
| That's how special he is. | ||
| But a loss like that to a guy like that, like to a real champ like Stipe, that lets you realize where the top of the game is. | ||
| There's a few more things to learn. | ||
| There's a lot more days to get in in training. | ||
| But that guy's just begun. | ||
| He's just begun. | ||
| Yeah, he's just begun. | ||
| Five years ago, he didn't know shit! | ||
| He's way better now than he was two fights ago. | ||
| Yeah, I see the difference. | ||
| I see the difference in the way he moves. | ||
| When he fought Overeem, it was significantly different than when I saw him in his first and second fights. | ||
| His first and second fights, he was very good. | ||
| Just insanely strong. | ||
| He would hit guys with these combinations and clean technique too, man. | ||
| He's not just a physically strong guy, he's also very smart because he's learning to do everything mechanically very good. | ||
| It's not like a guy who's only been striking for like three or four years, so they look a little tight and weird, but if they land, they got a lot of power. | ||
| No, man, everything is clean. | ||
| Like you said, some digging those trenches, Jack. | ||
| Oh, dude. | ||
| All that type of work gets you tough, tough. | ||
| He's just a special athlete. | ||
| And if he keeps going, man, I mean, boy, that guy learning more. | ||
| Think about how little you learn in five years. | ||
| Most of these guys have... | ||
| Way more time in. | ||
| Way more time in wrestling. | ||
| Way more time in kickboxing. | ||
| The average guy, by the time he gets to the UFC, I would like to know what the number is of how many years of training and competing they have. | ||
| But it's got to be more than two. | ||
| He was right in the UFC and smashing people. | ||
| He has an amazing story, man. | ||
| It's an amazing story. | ||
| And for a lot of people, the way it ended is a good lesson for martial artists. | ||
| It's a good lesson. | ||
| See, even if you were an Ngannou fan, you're bummed out that he lost. | ||
| I appreciate that. | ||
| I'm an Ngannou fan too, but I'm more of a fan of mixed martial arts. | ||
| I'm a fan of an honest... | ||
| I want to know what it is. | ||
| What is this? | ||
| What's this contest right here? | ||
| What's actually going on here? | ||
| What's going on here is phenomenal athletic talent, massive potential, like super alpha athlete versus One of the toughest guys ever, who's been in the game longer, who knows more. | ||
| He's wrestled. | ||
| He's been fighting way more. | ||
| He's been in the trenches way more times. | ||
| He's had to dig deep. | ||
| He knows what it's like to be really hurt and tired in a fight. | ||
| See, I appreciate the strategy of, like, how do you go into fighting a guy, like... | ||
| Perfect strategy. | ||
| It was like Rocky against Mr. T. Yeah. | ||
| That's what it exactly was like. | ||
| So it was like... | ||
| Heart and fucking, a little smart, stay away from that punch. | ||
| It had to be, and I haven't watched the full fight. | ||
| I was working then. | ||
| I'm on the fucking stage. | ||
| My brother getting hit by Francis Ngannou with MMA gloves is the worst thing that can happen to a person. | ||
| He's terrifying. | ||
| And Stipe got cracked multiple times in that fight. | ||
| It's not like he didn't get hit. | ||
| He got cracked. | ||
| But he had made up his mind. | ||
| He was going nowhere. | ||
| He knew what to do. | ||
| He'd been there before. | ||
| That's an incredible lesson for the overall sport, for mixed martial arts in general. | ||
| And the lesson is... | ||
| Like, he figured out, like, he had, like, the craziest end-of-video game character ever, right? | ||
| Ngannou's, like, the big boss in a video game. | ||
| They're like, fuck, I gotta play against this guy? | ||
| That's Ngannou. | ||
| And Stipe figured out how to beat him, being 20-plus pounds lighter than him, you know, way less intimidating in terms of his physical presence, although Stipe's pretty fucking intimidating. | ||
| But Ngannou's so intimidating. | ||
| He's so next level. | ||
| 265, natural, giant, crazy frame. | ||
| When you're next to Stipe, that's when you realize how big he is. | ||
| He's a big fella. | ||
| On TV, you don't look that big. | ||
| When you're next to him, you're like, this guy's a big fuck. | ||
| He's a big fuck. | ||
| Watch him walk around that. | ||
| His asset is his mind, though, Joe. | ||
| Yes, yes. | ||
| It's his mind. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| We talked about the Wikipedia page. | ||
|
unidentified
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I told you, immigrant mentality with American ingenuity. | |
| Listen, American ingenuity is fucking brilliant. | ||
| And with the immigrant mentality mixed, like let's say you're still an American, but your dad could have called you Steve. | ||
| No, you could still call him Stipe Miocik to remember where the fuck you came from. | ||
| You understand me? | ||
| His father came. | ||
| That's really weird. | ||
| Like the other night, you know, it was on, I almost called you Joe. | ||
| I hate calling you. | ||
| I almost called you to go, when was the last time you watched Bronx Tale? | ||
| Oh, you know what? | ||
| It's been on all week. | ||
| I watched it a year ago. | ||
| When he fucking finds them with the guns and he starts smacking the kids in the neighborhood, I still remember people's parents smacking kids in the neighborhood. | ||
|
unidentified
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Wow. | |
| Like, people's parents come in and go, what the fuck are you guys doing? | ||
| Get the fuck home, man. | ||
| One kid got a kick to the stomach, and the father punched the other kid, and nobody said dick. | ||
| Nobody said dick. | ||
| Dick! | ||
| No. | ||
| Like, I'm watching the biker scene. | ||
| When was the last... | ||
| Like, I haven't watched Bronx Tale in 20 years. | ||
| It's on AMC at 6.30. | ||
| When they locked the door, now you can't leave. | ||
| Bro, he's eating and shit, and all of a sudden he has the bikes and shit, and he walks over. | ||
| Oh, okay, nice. | ||
| Like a gentleman. | ||
| Yeah, alright, no problem. | ||
| One beer. | ||
| And all of a sudden they do a thing and he walks up to the guy, you gotta leave. | ||
| Now you can't leave. | ||
| And Collagero, like that guy named his son Collagero. | ||
| Who would do something like that? | ||
| That means you want your son to have the immigrant mentality. | ||
| But when they throw that beat on the bike, that's a true story. | ||
| Is it? | ||
| That's a true, true story. | ||
| Listen, in the 60s, you couldn't have longhand walk around the Bronx. | ||
| It just wasn't extended. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That hippie shit? | ||
|
unidentified
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That didn't happen in the Bronx in 1965. What if like a hippie was walking through the Bronx? | |
| They called you dirty hair? | ||
| They insulted you, they called you a bunch of shit, and then they threw a beating on you. | ||
|
unidentified
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Wow. | |
| And it's hysterical because that scene is so accurate. | ||
| Because after the adults threw a beating on you, then the neighborhood kids chased you, like the young kids with sticks. | ||
| And that's what we'd do. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| You know, like the little guys would chase you and once you were beat up and it took all your money. | ||
| It's a classic scene. | ||
| Hmm. | ||
| I was thinking about that, and I'm like, actually, I got to call Joe and ask him when the last time. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Look how bad to the bone. | ||
| Whether he stole it, Joe, whether he stole the scene or... | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| You've got to leave. | ||
| Your man is telling us you've got to leave. | ||
| Just tell him, sonny. | ||
|
unidentified
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The problem is your man here says we're not properly dressed. | |
| Like our money ain't green. | ||
| Like our money ain't green. | ||
|
unidentified
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That's it. | |
| That's it. | ||
|
unidentified
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We'll be on our way. | |
| We ain't looking for trouble. | ||
| Try to be careful for you, too. | ||
| Listen to how cool this Come Together sound, Doug. | ||
| He got them around, right? | ||
|
unidentified
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Yeah. | |
| Oh, this is a great scene, Joey. | ||
| This is a great song, Doug. | ||
| I forgot about this scene. | ||
| It's a perfect song, right? | ||
| Perfect song. | ||
| When he walks in, it starts in the beginning. | ||
| Watch this. | ||
|
unidentified
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All right, brothers, if I may, a toast to our host. | |
| Is this going to get us kicked off of YouTube? | ||
| No, no, no, no, no. | ||
| As long as we talk over it, we're good. | ||
| We're trying to be careful. | ||
| We're not ready. | ||
| Okay, okay. | ||
| This is it, right here. | ||
|
unidentified
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Uh-oh. | |
| I'll tell you when the fuck we leave. | ||
| All right, get the fuck away from me. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| Here it is. | ||
| Shuts the door. | ||
|
unidentified
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Uh oh. | |
| I will never forget the look on their faces. | ||
| All eight of them. | ||
| Their faces dropped. | ||
| All their courage and strength was drained right from their bodies. | ||
| They had a reputation for breaking This is real, Joe Rogan. | ||
| This was 1968 on fucking Jerome Avenue. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| So this is a true story. | ||
|
unidentified
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Jesus Christ. | |
| This scene is fucking brutal. | ||
| This is it. | ||
| This was when this was allowed. | ||
| Dude. | ||
|
unidentified
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This is craziness, bro. | |
| This was the Bronx in 68, 69. Fuck. | ||
| And the neighborhood, you know, like the neighborhood would tell you, hurry up, the cops are the people on the third floor. | ||
| We could see the cops on the third floor. | ||
| We could see the bulls coming down the street. | ||
| The whole neighborhood was in on it. | ||
| You know what's interesting to me? | ||
| This is all from immigrants, right? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| It's all our ancestors. | ||
| This was what they had to do. | ||
| This also movie is about him dating a black girl. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I forgot how good this movie was. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| This movie's brilliant. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Shout out to Frankie Renzulli. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| This movie's a genius movie. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Watch my car, you know. | ||
| Chaz Palminteri's great in this fucking movie. | ||
| This is it. | ||
| This was it. | ||
| This was it. | ||
| I forgot how good this is. | ||
| Now, see the young guys? | ||
| Now that's us, right? | ||
| We're seeing what's going on. | ||
|
unidentified
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Now you take this guy and we would fuck him up, dawg. | |
| This is crazy. | ||
| This is like animals. | ||
| Yeah, this is it. | ||
| This is how you were raised. | ||
| Italian immigrants, Spanish immigrants. | ||
| Oh my god, this is crazy. | ||
| Crazy. | ||
| When you think about their one generation removed from people who came off a boat. | ||
| Let me tell you what, the other side of this, here's the other side, like, alright, the big thing was, as we came to move here, I remember that he would come to the store, Frank Starr, Mike Starr was your friend, and he would come to the store, and there was a big rumor that Chaz stole these stories from him and put this together, and there was like this little war going on, but not really. | ||
| From Frankie Renzulli, yeah. | ||
| From Frankie Renzulli, the other gentleman, there was somebody else that was his roommate, that turned out to be somebody very big, and, uh, But there's a story one time that a biker dude, oh, Gravano money, and Gravano was hitting him, and he fell off the sidewalk and broke his leg. | ||
| So Gravano one night went out and fucking did something like this, something like with 20 guys, they beat up eight bikers. | ||
| I don't know how true it was. | ||
| But I still remember being five... | ||
| Like, if I could think, if you could hit me with truth serum, I could go back to being 1968, 1969 in the Bronx. | ||
| My daughter's five, and my mother would send me from the dry cleaner that she owned to the corner where it was an Italian place that had slices and Italian ice and shit like that. | ||
| Like, I was allowed to walk to the corner at Mercy's age. | ||
| On Tremont Avenue. | ||
| Like, I think about it. | ||
| I was looking at my daughter when I was watching Bronx, and I'm going, how different has time changed? | ||
| Like, I was allowed to go to a liquor store with a note and get my mother Marlboro Reds and bring them back in that neighborhood. | ||
| We didn't live there. | ||
| My mother just had a dry cleaner, and up there was a bookie numbers joint. | ||
| That's why we had the dry cleaner. | ||
| We were partners on the dry cleaner. | ||
| You didn't know that? | ||
| No. | ||
| That's why I got scars on my face. | ||
| I got bit by a German Shepherd as a kid. | ||
| Those three by one of the eyes, that's what we did. | ||
| When we came from Cuba, I lived on 205 West 88th Street. | ||
| And after my father died, my mother had a dry cleaner. | ||
| And that's what we... | ||
| We're up. | ||
| We were up in Jerome Avenue and Tremont and Grand Concourse, and we had a dry cleaner. | ||
| And every weekend, I would go up there, and I would sit there with the fucking... | ||
| I learned how to dry clean, and they had Black Mike. | ||
| Black Mike was the guy that ironed everything, but he made the best spaghetti in the Bronx. | ||
| So even Italians came to eat Black Mike's spaghetti. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, this was... | ||
| I knew all that shit when I was a kid. | ||
| Because when you have a numbers operation, you have to keep moving it around. | ||
| Right. | ||
| The cops can't. | ||
| So you have to, every three or four weeks, you have to move it around. | ||
| Explain the numbers to people who don't know what that means. | ||
| The numbers is the paramutual. | ||
| The last three numbers are the pari-mutual of the track, which is the amount the track made for the day. | ||
| So if the track made $686,482, the number for the day is $482, and it comes out as the Brooklyn number. | ||
| So there's three numbers a day. | ||
| There's Brooklyn, the Bronx, and New Jersey. | ||
| But what happened was that was a big business until... | ||
| The 80s till the lotto came out. | ||
| And the lotto cut that in half. | ||
| But before that, that was all put in little different immigrant neighborhoods all over New York City because as immigrants, we all want hope. | ||
| You know, we want that money to get that refrigerator and the stove and shit like that. | ||
| it's such a weird, uh, thing that they would gamble just $2 a day. | ||
| Remember $2 a day wins you a thousand dollars. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I can do a lot in 1975 with a thousand dollars with two kids. | ||
| My grandmother was obsessed with the numbers. | ||
| She was obsessed and she would always have like a number in her head that she thought it was gonna be and it was like one-off or something like that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It was like these stories she would tell you. | |
| What can I say? | ||
| I was like five. | ||
| I just remember it very distinctly. | ||
| My grandmother went to jail for running numbers. | ||
| In New Jersey? | ||
| She wouldn't rat them out, so they put her in jail. | ||
| So she made sweaters, gave sweaters to the guards. | ||
| Mrs. D, she's the nicest lady. | ||
| How did you feel that your grandmother had done time? | ||
| What did you think? | ||
| We didn't find out until I was probably like, I wonder when I found out. | ||
| I think maybe I found out in my teenage years. | ||
| And I was like, what? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What the fuck? | |
| Like, people would go to see her. | ||
| Like, where's, uh, I don't want to say my grandma's name out of respect, but people would say, you know, where is she? | ||
| And she's, oh, she went to visit her cousin. | ||
| Or she went to see her aunt. | ||
| And she was, you know, she was in the pokey for like six months. | ||
| I forget how much time it was, but every time we'd go over there, there was some new excuse. | ||
| See, in New Jersey, they put you in jail for gambling. | ||
| In New York City, they don't. | ||
| They give you a ticket. | ||
| They would give you a ticket and shit in those days. | ||
| I don't know what it's like now. | ||
| They'll throw you in jail for weed now in New York City. | ||
| I don't fucking know. | ||
| My grandmother was one of the few people I've ever known where I legitimately thought they had intuition. | ||
| She has weird intuition. | ||
| She would do things. | ||
| It was real weird. | ||
| Like, when my mother was a kid, there was a rainstorm. | ||
| It was like a real bad rainstorm. | ||
| And for whatever reason, my grandmother decided to wake my mother up, take her out of her bed and bring her downstairs. | ||
| Some crazy hunch that she had. | ||
| The ceiling's collapsed. | ||
| Like right above the bed where my mom was sleeping. | ||
| So like pieces of, you know, it wasn't a lot. | ||
| It was just chunks of plaster. | ||
| But like, you know, three or four pretty significant pieces of plaster fell off of the ceiling. | ||
| It was rain came through with the whole deal. | ||
| Like the ceiling gave out. | ||
| Somehow or another she had this idea in her head, and it could be because she knew that the ceiling was fucked up, and she knew it was raining hard, and it was probably going to give in anyway, or she might have had intuition. | ||
| Everyone was always convinced it was intuition. | ||
| Everyone was always convinced, like she's a little bit psychic. | ||
| It was always weird. | ||
| It was always weird around there. | ||
| She had a monkey. | ||
| Did I tell you about her monkey? | ||
| No. | ||
| She had a monkey, Chi Chi. | ||
| In New Jersey? | ||
| Yes, in New Jersey. | ||
| She had a monkey named Chi Chi, and Chi Chi would bite everybody but my grandma. | ||
| My grandfather made her keep the monkey in the attic. | ||
| Yo, my grandma was crazy. | ||
| She had a monkey who would open up packages of gum and chew gum. | ||
| Do you know how or where the fuck she got it from? | ||
| She bought it. | ||
| She bought a monkey. | ||
| Yo, I'm telling you, my grandma was crazy. | ||
| Listen, Italian people had butchers in those days, and they'd get you anything. | ||
| Alligator, pigeon. | ||
| She kept a monkey in the house, man. | ||
| Do you understand how crazy it is? | ||
| Do you remember the monkey? | ||
| Yes! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Chi-Chi! | |
| The monkey's name is Chi-Chi! | ||
| Did he bite you? | ||
| No, he never bit me, but he bit my sister. | ||
| He bit my sister. | ||
| Yeah, Chi-Chi would fuck you up. | ||
| I think he bit my sister. | ||
| I think he tried to bite my sister. | ||
| I think it was one of those things. | ||
| He might have bit my cousin. | ||
| Someone in our family got bit. | ||
| I never touched him. | ||
| I couldn't even get close. | ||
| Was that the Irish side or the Italian side? | ||
| No, the Italian side. | ||
| Yeah, they're nuts. | ||
| She was crazy. | ||
| And once you give, no disrespect, but once you give those lunatics that option that they do have intuition, you're done. | ||
| You're fucking done. | ||
| They start giving you the fish eyes. | ||
| Don't do shit. | ||
| You gotta listen to them. | ||
| Her cooking was from another planet. | ||
| It's from another planet. | ||
| It was like pure immigrant cooking. | ||
| Like the pasta, the lasagna. | ||
| You just sit there and go, holy shit. | ||
| Just perfect. | ||
| Just knew exactly what's supposed to be in there. | ||
| She'd make her own macaroni. | ||
| She'd make her own ravioli. | ||
| She would stuff her own ravioli. | ||
| She'd be out there rolling and flattening out flour and shit. | ||
| Throwing the flour on top of it, flattening it out. | ||
| She was a wizard. | ||
| Dog, you should get a monkey called a cheat. | ||
| Just out of respect. | ||
| A little monkey and keep it here, dog. | ||
| Out of respect for grandma. | ||
| My grandma was a special lady. | ||
| She was powerful. | ||
| Yeah, once you give those... | ||
| Listen, when I was a kid, man, I went to my buddy's judo school. | ||
| I didn't join. | ||
| I just went down there to see what it was like. | ||
| And it was hidden in Union City. | ||
| It was on 7th Street. | ||
| But I knew that my stepdad played cards on 9th Street on Wednesdays. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Okay? | ||
| I knew my stepdad played cards down there. | ||
| They played Baccarat. | ||
| Okay? | ||
| And they'd gamble in this little club. | ||
| And I had to be maybe 10. But because I grew up how I grew up with the numbers, I always had my eyes out as a kid. | ||
| When I went to judo that night at the end, I got on the bus to go back, and I noticed unmarked police cars. | ||
| And I went home that night. | ||
| And look, bro, you know me, dog. | ||
| Get Christy Love used to be a show on ABC about a black chick that knew martial arts. | ||
| They tried to capitalize on it with a sister. | ||
| And she was good looking with an afro and she was a cop. | ||
| And she'd come in and do karate moves. | ||
| So on Wednesday nights at 9 or 10 o'clock, you caught me at home watching Get Christy Love. | ||
| And I'll never forget that my stepdad was leaving that night. | ||
| And for some reason, I go, you gonna play Baccarat tonight? | ||
| And he looked at me. | ||
| He was getting dressed, a suit on. | ||
| He had like the Billy Batch suit on and shit. | ||
| You're gonna play cards with five men. | ||
| Why are you getting dressed to the nines? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And I said to him, I said, hey, man. | ||
| Today, I went down there to go to Martin's Judo School, and I saw a bunch of unmarked cars down there. | ||
| If I was you, I wouldn't go out to that. | ||
| And he fucking just looked at me. | ||
| He said, I love you, and he walked down the stairs. | ||
| He got in the car, started it, opened the garage, bro. | ||
| And ten minutes later, I heard the car turn off, and the garage closed, and he came up, and he goes, I think you're right. | ||
| And he made Sundays for me and him, and next morning, that card place had got raided. | ||
| So now, they would listen to me when I was a kid. | ||
| I had these fucking morons under my spell, right? | ||
| But you want me to tell you what else I did, Joe Rogan? | ||
| Like, this was me. | ||
| Like, me and my stepdad had this weird relationship. | ||
| I got to an age where I wanted my mother for myself. | ||
| You know what the feeling is, Joe Rogan. | ||
| We've all gone through it when you lose a dad and your mom remarries. | ||
| There comes a day that he's not going to tell you what's going on anymore. | ||
| And you know what? | ||
| I just want you to know that I'm the motherfucker that runs this joint. | ||
| You might be sleeping with my mom, but I run this motherfucker. | ||
| So once I gave him that advice, like it really... | ||
| For a while there, him and I were going afloat. | ||
| I kept stealing his coins from his Santa... | ||
| He had this San Lazaro thing, and that was everything to him. | ||
| So he had this big bottle of, like, scotch that was empty, and he would put silver dollars in there, and I would steal them. | ||
| And from time to time, he would come home and go, that bottle's looking light. | ||
| Somebody's stealing mine. | ||
| I destroyed his mind for years because he was a very particular man. | ||
| So he had different bundles of mine. | ||
| I got to tell you something. | ||
| I respect him today because I saw him get out of the joint, and I saw what he did with bookmaking. | ||
| And how he became partners on a butcher shop. | ||
| Oh, he started businesses? | ||
| He started different businesses. | ||
| So after I saved that night with the Baccarac, he would listen to me. | ||
| And then one day I went, and I signed up for Biddy Basketball in Union City. | ||
| And they used to give, you know, like now if you sign your kid up, you've got to pay $80. | ||
| Right. | ||
| In those days, you just show up with an address. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And they gave you a T-shirt. | ||
| They put you on the team, and they gave me a number. | ||
| They said, like, Union City Department of Recreation. | ||
| It was a purple shirt. | ||
| My number was 57. I walked in the house and he goes, what do you got there? | ||
| And I go, oh, I joined the basketball thing. | ||
| And he goes, what number is it? | ||
| He goes, 57. Cubans, again, are very superstitious. | ||
| 57. He goes, put a number on that. | ||
| And he picked up the phone. | ||
| I go, five. | ||
| He called some guy and he goes, give me 557 for $10. | ||
| Guess what happened, Joe Rogan? | ||
|
unidentified
|
What happened? | |
| The number came out. | ||
| Now I really had him under my spell, right? | ||
| Get the fuck out of here. | ||
| Listen, I had this motherfucker at the age of 12. So he would listen to me and shit. | ||
| How old was the guy? | ||
| My stepfather Juan at the time was 47, did not drink, did not do drugs, carried a straight razor, Joe Rogan. | ||
| A straight razor cut people with? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He used to wear carpenter pants with the straight razor. | ||
| At this point, the guy had money. | ||
| He would have a gold chain. | ||
| He'd wear a Chinese T-shirt, which a lot of people do not know what it is. | ||
| That's what real pimps wear. | ||
| They're silk handmade shirts from China. | ||
| That you wear, and they have three little buttons. | ||
| But when you're a real motherfucking Spick, you cut those buttons, and you get your initials, and you put them in gold with diamonds in it. | ||
| That's how Spicks ran in those days. | ||
| And once I had him there, Joe Rogan, I had him. | ||
| He trusted me. | ||
| He trusted my eyes. | ||
| So one night we're in Union City and I fucking went somewhere on the walk back. | ||
| There's a place called Pastor Music and it was next to the New Moon Chinese restaurant and I saw a bunch of unmarked cars. | ||
| And I'll never forget that I went back to the bar, and I told him, I said, dog, I saw three unmarked cars up the corner. | ||
| He was very always scared of the phone. | ||
| Even though he was a bookmaker, he never used a phone, Joe Rogan. | ||
| Never used a phone, and he would never have a conversation close to a phone. | ||
| This is because he always felt he did not like phones. | ||
| He did everything like a pigeon. | ||
| He would write the numbers on a little piece of paper, real small, and fold them up and put them in his hat. | ||
| And if he ever saw cops, he would just eat the piece of fucking paper. | ||
| He didn't give a fuck. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He always had the piece of paper somewhere close. | |
| Sometimes he would put it in his ring. | ||
| This motherfucker was a savage dog. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| So that night, the cops were gonna jump on us on the bar, but it was for a drug thing. | ||
| It wasn't for him. | ||
| But when I went back, I told him, listen, The cops were up the corner, and me and him, he grabbed me by the hand, and him and I walked from 29th and Bergenlein to 58th and Bergenlein down to Hudson, telling different bar owners that there was going to be a raid. | ||
| Like, that's how untrustworthy he was of phones. | ||
| And by the time we got back to the bar, we got raided. | ||
| And there was a dude in there, his name was Monina. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Monina is those crazy Cubans that are abacoa. | ||
| Monina means good man. | ||
| Abacoa? | ||
| Yeah, they're abacoa. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What does that mean? | |
| They don't eat pussy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
| They don't eat pussy and they fucking... | ||
| You can't fuck around with animals because they're saying Lazarus and all that shit. | ||
| Oh, they have a very specific religion? | ||
| Yeah, they have. | ||
| It's a manhood. | ||
| They were longshoremen in Cuba. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| And they maintain order. | ||
| So if you fuck up, they come over and fuck you up. | ||
| But he had a wig. | ||
| I'll never forget this. | ||
| The guy, Monina, had a wig. | ||
| And the cops were there. | ||
| And they threw him on. | ||
| And I'm like 12, dog. | ||
| I'm up against the wall. | ||
| They're searching me, too. | ||
| They're searching my stepdad. | ||
| They got my mom. | ||
| And they went to Monina. | ||
| And they searched him. | ||
| And the cop looked at his wig. | ||
| And he goes, check the wig. | ||
| And they pulled the wig off. | ||
| And he had a little aluminum foil with cocaine. | ||
|
unidentified
|
- The cocaine's got to take to his head. | |
| Oh my God, so real good. - Oh my God, that's hilarious. - That whole bookmaker numbers world is fucking nuts that I grew up in. | ||
| I love it still. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| I wonder what it's like now. | ||
| There's no business in it. | ||
| Well, it's unfortunate because... | ||
| You think about how many bets are placed. | ||
| Oh, Jesus Christ. | ||
| There's so much money out there. | ||
| There's so much money out there. | ||
| People love to gamble. | ||
| Fucking games, when games are on, people love to gamble. | ||
| What do you think is spent this weekend, Jamie? | ||
| Come on, Jamie. | ||
| Here's my question, Joey. | ||
| Like, why is that a problem? | ||
| Like, what's helping us by letting them regulate that shit? | ||
| Like, why? | ||
| Why do you have to have a license to gamble? | ||
| Why? | ||
| You know, if you think someone's not paying their taxes and you can prove it, is it because it's money? | ||
| It's cash that's being thrown around mostly? | ||
| Why is it an issue? | ||
| The government's not getting their piece? | ||
| It seems ridiculous that grown adults could tell other grown adults they can't gamble. | ||
| But you can here. | ||
| But you can't there. | ||
| Bro, gambling is one of those things like legalization of marijuana. | ||
| Like legalization of fucking cocaine. | ||
| Like legalization of anything, bro. | ||
| You know what? | ||
| There's going to be fucking winners and there's going to be fucking losers, my friends. | ||
| Two years ago, Connecticut did an expose on 60 Minutes about women who have just lost their fucking minds gambling at Mohican Son because they installed, no disrespect to Mohican Son of Casino Industries, they installed these type of slot machines that could just fuck with your mind. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| So these women were going down there and losing fucking mortgages, houses, you know? | ||
| Sounds like a John Waters movie, doesn't it? | ||
| Dog, it was just something that, listen, the biggest... | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| Listen, listen, let's get something out of the way here. | ||
| The biggest percentage of degenerate gamblers are usually women. | ||
| Let's look this fucking percentage up here. | ||
| Women go fucking deep. | ||
| It's a fucking hole. | ||
| They don't give a fuck about nothing. | ||
| They fucking play cards. | ||
| Women fucking bang it out. | ||
| And they bang it out while you're at work, Joe Rogan, while I'm at work. | ||
| They start with a horse, then they go to their—you know, those little tours they do in Jersey. | ||
| When Atlantic City was Atlantic City, you went to Union City, right? | ||
| You paid $15 to get on a bus, they gave you a coupon book, and when you get to Atlantic City, they give you $15 and quarters back. | ||
| So they're basically driving you to fucking gamble and drive back. | ||
| I believe in gambling. | ||
| I believe in making a living. | ||
| I believe that it's an itch. | ||
| It's an illness, whatever, but when you're losing your house. | ||
| That's where, I want to know where, that's where it bothers me. | ||
| It's just like cocaine. | ||
| It's just like drug abuse. | ||
| It's just like the opiate problem. | ||
| It's just like anything else. | ||
| You and I both know people who have lost their fucking lives gambling. | ||
| Okay? | ||
| You've seen people in pool halls. | ||
| You see how they get Joe Rogan. | ||
| There's no difference in the drug addict than the gambling addict. | ||
| Not at all. | ||
| No difference. | ||
| It's just as scary, too, because they're conscious. | ||
| It's like if you see the drug addict, you see him, he's shooting up or whatever it is, and you see him fainting, you go, oh, that poor bastard. | ||
| But when you see a guy who's fully in the grips of gambling, trying to figure out how to get his money back, and he's all jazzed up with adrenaline, he doesn't understand why. | ||
| See, there's gamblers like Michael Jordan. | ||
| Then there's gamblers like Joey Diaz. | ||
| There's gamblers who have the means to gamble. | ||
| And that is a fucking killer also. | ||
| Like a Michael Jordan. | ||
| Like a Michael Jordan. | ||
| And I'm not saying nothing bad about Michael Jordan. | ||
| These are just accusations that you hear that he even bets on his own one-on-one basketball games. | ||
| He was very competitive. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| But now, how Joey Diaz was doing it. | ||
| Not how people... | ||
| Charles Barkley lost nearly $30 million gambling, it says. | ||
| Jesus, Charles! | ||
| How much money does Charles Barkley have? | ||
| How many people did you grow up that were like Joey Diaz that didn't have the means, that were 19 years old? | ||
| Okay, and one night they put a 10-time bet in on a fucking Knick game and they won $50. | ||
| When you're 19, $50 is a lot of fucking money. | ||
| That's a lot of fucking money. | ||
| So now you think you got the world by the ball, so you do it again on Friday, Saturday, and now you enter this world, Joe Rogan, that gets dark. | ||
| Instead of the drug addiction or the alcohol addiction, every morning you wake up like, is today my lucky day? | ||
| It's like the people who go to the 7-Eleven every day and you're trying to just get a pack of rolling papers. | ||
| You're just in a rush. | ||
| You just left jujitsu. | ||
| You just want rolling papers and water. | ||
| And there's a guy in front of you and he's telling you, give me three 68s, four 64s, and this poor fucking... | ||
| Whatever gives him 20 lottery tickets. | ||
| And it's $118. | ||
| This is what this guy's doing every day. | ||
| Seven fucking days a week, my friend. | ||
| And he might be winning $200 a fucking week. | ||
| But every week he's getting deeper and deeper into a fucking hole. | ||
| Because in your mind, you think today's your lucky day. | ||
| And it's never your lucky... | ||
| I was in that hole when I was 19, dog. | ||
| And I saw a friend lose... | ||
| $80,000 when you're 18 years old and you had to get three jobs. | ||
| And I never really fucked with that again. | ||
| I learned that addiction. | ||
| That shit left my world early. | ||
| You know who's a degenerate loser gambler? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who? | |
| John Gotti. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who? | |
| He wanted because they brag. | ||
| Right. | ||
| That's their conversation. | ||
| How much they made and how much they lost. | ||
| Get away from me. | ||
| You have no fucking idea. | ||
| If I had fucking Michigan and the hook, I would have made $30,000. | ||
| They lose $80,000, $90,000, $200,000. | ||
| The system is designed to bury the degenerate gambler. | ||
| Like, from August 15th... | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| John Gotti's secret obsession that waged 600 bets in Scrabble and a $3,000 monopoly buy-in. | ||
| You have no idea, guys. | ||
| The degenerate... | ||
| For like seven months... | ||
| I played this fucking ugly game, Joe, that I would start. | ||
| I knew the action. | ||
| I knew that you had to bet on Monday nights and try to win. | ||
| And you know what? | ||
| I lost every week. | ||
| And all these people who sell you information, listen, Arch Lietzer played the fucking game and lost. | ||
| Pete Rose bet and lost. | ||
| Even Michael Jordan bet and lost. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's rumors that that's why he was asked to play baseball for a few years because it was a cover-up. | ||
| Again, I did not write this. | ||
| This is just things I hear on the road. | ||
| Everybody has a fucking problem. | ||
| Gambling grabs you. | ||
| Fucking weird, bro. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Weird. | |
| And it grabbed me for a long time. | ||
| I kept thinking that was the day. | ||
| And I kept betting 40 times. | ||
| What's up, Jamie? | ||
| If they had a problem playing Scrabble, they would call up the Parker Brothers hotline like mobsters would to dispute the rules and have them explain what was going on. | ||
| What's the fucking rule? | ||
| Lamingia is a word. | ||
| Stamingia is a word, Joe. | ||
| Staminkia is not a word. | ||
| Staminkia is a word. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wiki dude, he told me. | |
| That's why they were getting into arguments. | ||
| Garbage man, cafe, you know. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| Bro, no, gambling is a fucking nightmare. | ||
| And once you get caught in the web and Joe Rogan shuts me down, then I start putting bets with Jamie. | ||
| And then pretty soon I start fucking dipping into accounts. | ||
| And pretty soon, now you're done. | ||
| Now you get forced into a bad hand. | ||
| I told you that I was a backer on the road for a while, my friend Johnny B. When I started making money doing stand-up, I put together a little bankroll, and me and him would go places and gamble. | ||
| And he would win or lose, you know, sometimes he'd win, sometimes he'd lose. | ||
| But it was just being in action. | ||
| It was fun. | ||
| That kind of gambling. | ||
| I was never good enough to play those guys, but I could play people that were my level, and you'd bet $20, or maybe if you want to get crazy, bet $50. | ||
| I never bet a lot of money gambling on pool, but it makes you think more. | ||
| It makes you play, like, way more serious. | ||
| It's good for your game. | ||
| And if you can have a friendly sparring partner that you play, like, friendly games, like maybe a race to seven for 20 bucks. | ||
| So it costs you probably in any city pool halls. | ||
| I don't know what the rate is per hour, but they gotta be, like, at least 20 bucks an hour. | ||
| Alright, once and for all, once and for all, I want you to break it down for me. | ||
| I walk into a pool hall with Jamie. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I got 10 G's cash in my pocket. | ||
| Jamie's my main man. | ||
| How do I exactly make money? | ||
| And why is it that the people in the room pass money around? | ||
| And how does that money get dispersed? | ||
| It's real simple. | ||
| Everybody puts, like, you put in. | ||
| I'm in for a hundred. | ||
| Jamie's my boy. | ||
| Like, it depends on who's putting it together. | ||
| Because they might decide to just pool in all their money. | ||
| Like, everybody put in on one side, pool in money, and, you know, and back this guy. | ||
| Or they might be betting on the side. | ||
| They might not even be playing the game. | ||
| There's always side bets. | ||
| Side bets are probably more, like, if you had a bet, if you had, like, a big pool game, right, in a, there used to be a place called, uh, What is it? | ||
| West End Billiards, I think? | ||
| In New Jersey? | ||
| West End. | ||
| I think it was called... | ||
| See if you find West End Billiards. | ||
| It was a world famous pool hall. | ||
| We would take the drive from New York to go down to New Jersey to this famous... | ||
| Pool Hall that would have these serious high-level professionals play there. | ||
| And real high-level hustlers from all over the country would go there for big money games. | ||
| You could go there and watch people play for $5,000, $10,000. | ||
| I mean, the best in the world would be there all the time. | ||
| I got to play against some of the best in the world. | ||
| They killed me, but I got to play against them. | ||
| Like real good guys. | ||
| You just enter the tournament. | ||
| If you and I are in the tournament and you are Efren Reyes, the greatest of all time, or Earl Strickland, or Johnny Archer, and I'm just Joe Rogan, I barely can play. | ||
| It doesn't matter. | ||
| I put my money up, I enter the tournament, I can play against you. | ||
| Unless it's a huge, huge, like, where you have to get invited. | ||
| So now does Joey Diaz come on the side and go, listen, I'm putting three to one odds on this. | ||
| Sure, some people definitely do. | ||
| Okay, so that's a side bet. | ||
| Yes, side bets all over the place. | ||
| I don't know how the pool... | ||
| I got a hundred bucks on Archer. | ||
| You know, oh, you've never seen this Diaz kid play. | ||
| I got a hundred on Diaz. | ||
| And dudes will go, I'll take that, I'll take that. | ||
| And then you just work it out. | ||
| And everybody works it out. | ||
| But sometimes guys will get together and back somebody, too. | ||
| Like, say, if you've got a friend that's a really good player, and this guy's coming in from out of town, And he wants to take a crack at him and go, well, he wants to play $100 sets. | ||
| Okay, and then you have to think, how many barrels do we have? | ||
| You pull all your money together. | ||
| Okay, we got four barrels. | ||
| That means if he wants to play sets, we can lose four times. | ||
| So you have to be able to lose a couple, gain a couple. | ||
| Like, if you're going to really play a guy out, these guys would play 10, 12 hours. | ||
| They would keep going back and forth and back and forth. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| Like, I've seen guys, and you would see them the next day, they'd still be playing. | ||
| You'd go there in the morning, they'd be playing all through the night. | ||
| I don't know what the fuck they were on. | ||
| Most likely some sort of amphetamines. | ||
| That was a big thing in the pool world for a while. | ||
| Guys would just break each other with gambling. | ||
| It would be about who quits. | ||
| It wouldn't be about who won. | ||
| It's very rarely about like, you know, like you would be frowned upon highly if you left on top. | ||
| Say if you're ahead by 500 bucks, And you want to quit me? | ||
| And I'm still ready to keep playing? | ||
| I still got more money, man. | ||
| Let me win my money back. | ||
| If you just walked away, nope, I've got what I wanted. | ||
| I'm going to leave now. | ||
| You'd be what's called bad action. | ||
| Guys, I got two kids. | ||
| I got to get up at seven and go bring them to school. | ||
| You shouldn't be on the pool hall, motherfucker. | ||
| With two kids, you're not playing that kind of pool. | ||
| There ain't nobody with two kids playing that level pool in pool halls, like gambling and hustling. | ||
| There's a pool hall, motherfucker. | ||
| Maybe now there are. | ||
| There's actually a few guys. | ||
| I take that back. | ||
| There's a few guys with kids that are top of the food chain. | ||
| There's a pool hall a mile from my house. | ||
| Whenever I go into Hollywood now, I can't do Laurel King no more, so I gotta go the long way. | ||
| And I get off on victory just to see it fucking always filled with degenerates. | ||
| I'm petrified to pull in there. | ||
| Those places were home to me. | ||
| You know which one I'm talking about, right? | ||
| Next to the strip club? | ||
| Is that a good one? | ||
| Victory. | ||
| Right when you exit there. | ||
| There's a strip club right next to a pool hall. | ||
| Well, I know the only good one in this area. | ||
| Well, I shouldn't say the only good one. | ||
| The only good one I know of is House of Billiards in Sherman Oaks, like this area. | ||
| That place is great. | ||
| You've been on the 101. Have you seen what that place is? | ||
| You took me there a couple times to eat. | ||
| We did comedy there. | ||
| Remember Hollywood Billiards? | ||
| You took me there on Hollywood Boulevard. | ||
| It's fucking a building. | ||
| What is it now? | ||
| I'll go there next time. | ||
| What does it look like? | ||
| Joe, next time I drove by and I was like... | ||
| Oh my god, that used to be... | ||
| We did comedy there. | ||
| Joe took me to eat there with Ari a couple times. | ||
| We played pool there a bunch of times. | ||
| A bunch of times. | ||
| That place was great. | ||
| It's fucking done. | ||
| That whole area is completely different. | ||
| That's where I met Crazy Max Eberle. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Yeah, that dude can play some fucking pool. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Woo! | |
| So when you play Max Eberle, how much do I have to put up? | ||
| I still put up one-to-one. | ||
| Yeah, I would get tortured. | ||
| You would have to bet, like, that I would go to... | ||
| You're never gonna bet on me. | ||
| Like, a guy like Max Eberle, he's top of the food chain as far as his technique and delivery. | ||
| He could win a world championship tournament, like, legitimately. | ||
| He's that good. | ||
| I have no chance. | ||
| If we play 12 games, I might win a couple. | ||
| I might get lucky and win a few. | ||
| Maybe I'll win four. | ||
| He's going to win way more. | ||
| He's going to get to 12, for sure, quicker. | ||
| It'd be a terrible bet. | ||
| The bet would be how many games do I get to? | ||
| That would be the bet. | ||
| If you say, you'll never get past three. | ||
| Because a guy like Max Ablett can run 10 racks in a row. | ||
| And I'm not exaggerating. | ||
| I've seen him do it. | ||
| Blam! | ||
| Breaks, runs 10 racks in a row. | ||
| To the point where you're sitting there. | ||
| He did it in Vegas. | ||
| We were all hanging out. | ||
| I think it was... | ||
| Man, was it Ari? | ||
| I forget who came with me. | ||
| Actually, you guys were going to the Italian place. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| That place was amazing. | ||
| And that's exactly where Max was playing. | ||
| He would break and run out on guys, and they would just get frustrated. | ||
| They'd be like, what the fuck, man? | ||
| They just didn't get to shoot. | ||
| We watched him. | ||
| He was gambling some guy. | ||
| And when the set was over, the guy was just pissed off. | ||
| Because Max just wouldn't miss. | ||
| It was crazy. | ||
| Just watch him. | ||
| He's playing a guy that really just... | ||
| Wanted to take a chance and play like a top of the food chain guy and he gambled with him. | ||
| But just watching the difference between a kid who can play a little pool is pretty good versus a world championship caliber pool player. | ||
| They're so precise. | ||
| Like his technique is so clean and his angles are perfect and he's just effortlessly moving the cue ball on the table to where he wants it. | ||
| He sees clusters and problems way in advance and breaks them up. | ||
| It's so high level. | ||
| That's my boy. | ||
| That's Max Alberly. | ||
| He taught me how to play pool. | ||
| Not that I didn't already play it before I met him, but he taught me how to play it way better, way better. | ||
| He made my game way more technical. | ||
| He was explaining things that I was just guessing before, and he was explaining what was wrong with my approach and what's a better way to do it. | ||
| He's a wizard when it comes to technique. | ||
| Now, he can make a living going from pool hall to pool hall or no way because he's that good. | ||
| Well, he's an artist too, fortunately for Max. | ||
| He makes pretty cool artwork. | ||
| Some of it's probably on his Instagram page. | ||
| I thought he did pool cues or something. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| Who's our friend that does pool cues? | ||
| Who does pool cues? | ||
| Somebody along the way said he makes like fucking 8G pool cues, ivory. | ||
| Eric Crisp. | ||
| That's my boy Eric from Sugar Tree. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There you go. | |
| Somewhere. | ||
| Somebody. | ||
| That's what I play with. | ||
| I play with his cue. | ||
| His cue is, uh, he's a wizard, man. | ||
| He's a guy who's, like, really into, like, the grains of woods. | ||
| He's really into, like, patterns, and he thinks of, like, to him, wood is, like, mesmerizing. | ||
| He finds, like, the most beautiful pieces of wood and combines them together, and they have to have a certain harmonic frequency. | ||
| Like, he drops them on the cement floor, just like, dink, dink. | ||
| Like, he wants to hear a certain sound from the wood. | ||
| Otherwise, he won't use it. | ||
| He's like finding logs on the side of the highway and shit and recognizing some weird hardwood that no one's ever used before and he cuts it up and makes a cue out of it. | ||
| He's a wizard. | ||
| Like his cues are ridiculous. | ||
| And he doesn't give a fuck. | ||
| He makes as many as he wants. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Sometimes he don't make them for a while. | ||
| Makes them for his friends. | ||
| Won't let me pay for one. | ||
| I have to pay for everything just to not feel terrible. | ||
| He's like the nicest guy ever. | ||
| Play some fucking pool, too. | ||
| So I don't even know when this podcast started and when it began. | ||
| It's happening. | ||
| But it's funny. | ||
| Before we started, we were talking about, yeah, $4.8 billion in the Super Bowl. | ||
| 3% will happen in Nevada. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| Only 3%. | ||
| So is most of it online? | ||
| Online. | ||
| What's that Chris Christie thing you pulled up earlier, Jamie? | ||
| Listen, G, online and banks. | ||
| Banks. | ||
| There's still people who... | ||
| I like, you know, they got a ton of loot. | ||
| Chris Christie goes to the Supreme Court on sports betting. | ||
| Is he trying to get sports betting legalized? | ||
| They passed something in New Jersey, I think in 2011, to allow betting in sports, but it's still only allowed in Vegas because of whatever law there is. | ||
| I'm back on your team, Chris. | ||
| You might have a few problems, but we all do. | ||
| There's 17 states also with him on this. | ||
| I think they want to do it. | ||
| So he opposed it? | ||
| They want it again. | ||
| They want betting again because they have an NHL team in Vegas and that's always been like the logic is that there'll be some issue, whatever. | ||
| You can't be betting where there's sports being played because someone will throw the game. | ||
| Everybody should be able to bet. | ||
| Every city. | ||
| She'll do whatever you want. | ||
| As long as they tax you. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| You're an adult. | ||
| What the fuck are you going to do? | ||
| And these games though, I'm fascinated by these games you say are hypnotizing ladies and they're going crazy, losing all their money. | ||
| 60 Minutes. | ||
| They did a whole piece on it? | ||
| A whole piece on these games that are like laser-ish. | ||
| You know, and people were actually... | ||
| But the percentage was higher amongst women because of its... | ||
|
unidentified
|
So let me explain something to you. | |
| It's like video games, only gambling. | ||
| It's very fucking... | ||
| So addictive like a video game, but also gambling. | ||
| Yes, very gambling. | ||
| So that's what their beef was, to remove these type of games. | ||
| Because I'm telling you, since I was a kid, I always... | ||
| First off... | ||
| I lived with my mother. | ||
| She had a lot of problems. | ||
| She had a lot of great issues. | ||
| But she was a degenerate gamer on baseball. | ||
| Between the Boston Red Sox and the New York Mets, they killed her. | ||
| They killed her. | ||
| And I saw the decline. | ||
| I saw a person watch two baseball games at the same time. | ||
| Remember in those days you didn't have split screen and direct TV. So if you were Puerto Rican, you took one TV and you put it on top of the other TV and you got fucking NBC and you had... | ||
| Remember when HBO still had the cord to the fucking thing? | ||
| And it was a thing with a box that you pressed and you switched three levels? | ||
| In those days, maybe. | ||
| And there was no ABA package or NBA package. | ||
| You got like one other game. | ||
| So we would pray that it would be the Boston Red Sox, and she would watch both fucking games and gamble at the same time. | ||
| Not even that, the numbers. | ||
| If she had a dream about a goat, bam. | ||
| If she had a dream about going back to Cuba, bam. | ||
| That sounds so much like my family. | ||
| If she had a dream about seeing her daughter, bam, it was a number. | ||
| They would call her. | ||
| They would call her at a quarter to three because she had all those contacts. | ||
| So that was that gambling. | ||
| Then there was the track addiction. | ||
| Which started at Aqueduct in the afternoon. | ||
| If the sun was shining, that was an excuse to go to Aqueduct for my mother. | ||
| Let me go to Aqueduct. | ||
| I'll see you at 3 after school. | ||
| And she'd be there at 3. But the whole time she'd be scratching. | ||
| Because the Meadowlands started at 8th. | ||
| So she knew she could catch the Meadowlands at 8. So guess what happens then if you lose the 8 o'clock Meadowlands? | ||
|
unidentified
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What? | |
| You haul your ass to Yonkers with the death of death. | ||
| This is where you go to before you go to a pool hall to sell your blood. | ||
| You go to Yonkers Raceway. | ||
| Do you understand me? | ||
| Have you ever been to Yonkers Raceway? | ||
| I've heard of it. | ||
| Yeah, you leave there at quarter to one. | ||
| Where do you think you're going? | ||
| You're either going to sell your soul or give your blood so you go shoot pool because you're saving the day. | ||
| You cannot go home and lose her. | ||
| Right, right. | ||
| And there's all day gambling. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| So that was her thing. | ||
| So I also grew up in an Italian family that the mother was Joey. | ||
| It was like a fucking act. | ||
| It was like an act. | ||
| She had three kids. | ||
| They were tremendous kids. | ||
| I knew the husband. | ||
| He worked for a big corporation. | ||
| They drove a nice car. | ||
| They went to church. | ||
| But on Saturdays, when I go over there, I always go, where's your mom? | ||
| And they go, my mom plays cards with the Rogans and this name. | ||
| But as I got older, one day somebody said to me, Doug, be careful when you go over there. | ||
| Why? | ||
| They might shoot that lady in the head. | ||
| She owns like 600 pounds. | ||
| I mean... | ||
| When I was a kid, I was like 13, and somebody came to me and said, be careful when you go with it because the mom's a little bit on those card games. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Imagine being scared for your life from a card game. | |
| Imagine being scared for your life. | ||
| Well, it was a different game. | ||
| That's how they suck you in. | ||
| So a lot of the people... | ||
| Now, I also grew up with men degenerate gamblers, but I know all the symptoms. | ||
| I know the itch. | ||
| This thing on 60 Minutes just spoke about this addiction with... | ||
| A computer thing with women. | ||
| That was it. | ||
| That was really interesting. | ||
| But I know how it fucking creeps up on you. | ||
| It was on a couple years ago. | ||
| It's called slot machines, the big gamble. | ||
| Oh, so it's just slot machines in general? | ||
| These type of slot machines. | ||
| These computer ones? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| They have an effect on women in particular? | ||
| Maybe man the fuck up, ladies. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| No, dog. | ||
| Here's my take on this whole gambling thing. | ||
| Like, remember horse betting in New York? | ||
| Like, you'd go to the horse... | ||
| Off-track betting. | ||
| Yeah, it was right there. | ||
| Right there. | ||
| They made that for a reason. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I mean, they're just trying to make it legal. | ||
| This is legal. | ||
| Come on, this is legal. | ||
| It's not legal. | ||
| It's to take a piece, Joe Rubin. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| No, I'm saying that. | ||
| They want their piece. | ||
| Have you been to a medical marijuana store recently? | ||
| No, I haven't. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| What do they like? | ||
| If it's $60, your tab is now $76. | ||
| Because it taxes? | ||
| It's $16 in taxes if you buy something for $60. | ||
| The thing about weed though is it goes so far. | ||
| Think about how much like $100 worth of weed goes. | ||
| You could be on the moon for three days. | ||
| For three days! | ||
| You could be on the moon with the proper edibles. | ||
| Get $100 worth of the proper edibles. | ||
| How much do you think you can handle? | ||
| How many Jumbos do you think you could handle? | ||
| You ever have a Jumbo? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| What do they have, like? | ||
| Depends on, I think, 100 to 200 or something like that. | ||
| Yeah, dude. | ||
| I fucked up and ate half a Jumbo once. | ||
| I felt my cells. | ||
| I felt all the cells in my bones. | ||
| I felt, like, where the tendons connected on my spine. | ||
| It's like, you could get fucking blasted. | ||
| And it'll last you 12 hours. | ||
| And then take the other half. | ||
| That's another 12 hours. | ||
| Now, are the taxes higher in Las Vegas, Jamie, than they are here for weed? | ||
| 35% here. | ||
| How much? | ||
| 35%. | ||
| And what's in Vegas? | ||
| It's high, but it depends on if it's... | ||
| Bro, they changed the motherfucking game, dog. | ||
| Like, there's no more stars of debt. | ||
| That's so silly. | ||
| There's no more hello tushies. | ||
| The TKOs, I bought the final fucking... | ||
| I got a cartel. | ||
| I'm like Pablo Escobar. | ||
| I got a fucking cachet. | ||
| Of the ones I ate this morning, those hello, the TKOs? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, you can't find them, but I got to tell. | ||
| I got to leave. | ||
| They become like Cuban cigars. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| They're like Cuban cigars now. | ||
| So some people are just going to keep going. | ||
| There's no more. | ||
| Like, I told people there's no more stars, but there is stars. | ||
| You know, there ain't, but there ain't. | ||
| Like, people are going fucking bananas now, because now you got to see the... | ||
| Like, I only go to two weed stores. | ||
| But I go to one that's by the book. | ||
| And I go to one that they just said, you know what? | ||
| We're like Stipe Mayo Chick. | ||
| We don't give a fuck. | ||
| This is immigrant mentality. | ||
| We open at 6. We close at 10. We give away free bagels. | ||
| If you come at 6 o'clock. | ||
| And you gotta see it. | ||
| They're rocking and rolling. | ||
| And they're gonna sell those 200 milligram stars till people go down the fucking end. | ||
| Or the DEA comes in and shuts them down. | ||
| They don't give a fuck. | ||
| If you're on Ventura Boulevard, you gotta be really cool. | ||
| Because you're done. | ||
| I don't think there's anything wrong with having a limit on the number of milligrams if that's going to keep it legal. | ||
| And that's also probably for a lot of people. | ||
| No, they just created a black market. | ||
| They did. | ||
| They created a black market. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| You know how much it's going to cost the stars of that dude to stay open? | ||
| How much? | ||
| A half a mil. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Because it's $70,000 just for the license sheet money. | ||
| They take that paper up front. | ||
| They're like Led Zeppelin. | ||
| They're like Peter Grant in 1975. But look, the economy is going to improve and they're still going to kill it. | ||
| Oh, no, no. | ||
| The economy is going to improve. | ||
| But I'll tell you what, how much are they going to take right off the top? | ||
| Because they're banging. | ||
| They looked at Colorado's thing and said, listen, we're coming in with steroids. | ||
| We're coming in with THD. Forget what they're doing. | ||
| Listen to what we're doing. | ||
| Just to set shop now? | ||
| We don't care if you've been in business or not. | ||
| Just to set up shop, we've got to get a piece of the action. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But here's the thing. | |
| It would be fine if they worked deals out with banks and made it easy and acceptable for these guys. | ||
| Oh, it's going to be acceptable now. | ||
| But it's right. | ||
| In a lot of places it wasn't. | ||
| They were dealing in cash. | ||
| They hired, especially in Colorado in the early days, they had to hire a lot of like spec ops guy. | ||
| I love saying spec ops. | ||
| Like, I know. | ||
| What the fuck I'm talking about? | ||
| It just sounds cool. | ||
| They would hire, like, former SEALs and shit, and they would have to carry the money to the bank because everybody knew there was, like, giant sums of cash. | ||
| So it made it very dangerous. | ||
| They weren't allowing them to use banks or credit cards, rather. | ||
| They weren't allowing them to, you know, sell weed with credit cards. | ||
| But they were selling weed and credit cards in L.A., medical. | ||
| The hot. | ||
| In the 90s. | ||
| The hot store, when you turned me on to my license, the hot store at the time, which they're not there no more. | ||
| That dude, at the height of it, was walking out of there every day with 25 grand by himself and his wife. | ||
| Wow, that's dangerous. | ||
| He was, but you know what, he was a dumb as fuck. | ||
| When the DA came, he had half that cash in the safe right then and there. | ||
| They just swooped on him. | ||
| I know a guy who got shot. | ||
| He was a really nice guy, and he used to work at the Englewood Wellness Center. | ||
| And this was the early days of the medical legalization. | ||
| It was like... | ||
| I want to say it's like somewhere around two ninety nine somewhere somewhere in that range two thousand ninety nine and He apparently was coming out with a big bag of cash and someone shot him right in the stomach Took his money. | ||
| They didn't take care of themselves. | ||
| Took all the cash. | ||
| There was nothing you could do. | ||
| You gotta hire people. | ||
| Yeah, you gotta hire people. | ||
| You gotta hire people. | ||
| You know, I see amateur mistakes constantly. | ||
| Yeah, I saw this Jamie. | ||
| I see amateur mistakes constantly. | ||
| For example, the store I'm talking about, he lost everything, Joe Rogan. | ||
| You want me to tell you why he lost everything? | ||
| Any weed he got, this guy was an exotic guy himself. | ||
| Like, he was a head. | ||
| When you're a head, you love when somebody brings you. | ||
| So he bought as much as he could. | ||
| I love that expression, a head. | ||
| He was a head. | ||
| Nobody uses that anymore. | ||
| They don't use that anymore. | ||
| So what he would do is, when you walked into this place, he would have 60 weeds on the wall. | ||
| And he kept all his weed on the property. | ||
| When the feds came, it was like stealing. | ||
| He had everything there. | ||
| Everything was there wide in the open. | ||
| You have to have an apartment and you have to have an amount. | ||
| Six ounces is all you should have of one weed. | ||
| If Jamie comes in and he wants eight ounces, give me ten minutes. | ||
| I got a pigeon that'll bring it over here in five minutes. | ||
| Right across the street there. | ||
| I got a little apartment with some stash there. | ||
| You have a couple safes. | ||
| If the cops ain't gonna let you deposit it, you gotta be fucking creative. | ||
| If you read all these guys' stories, the hardest thing is what to do with all the cash. | ||
| Think about that problem, Joe Rogan. | ||
| It's a real problem. | ||
| No, no, think about this room filled with $100. | ||
| What was the movie I just watched? | ||
| Escobar. | ||
| Oh, no, no, no, no, no. | ||
| Just on a plane. | ||
| When you're on a plane and Tom Cruise is on, you've got to give him the benefit of the doubt. | ||
| I got an edible in me. | ||
| I watched the Barry Seal thing. | ||
| How was it? | ||
| It's not an Academy Award winner, but it's very interesting when we're just burying money, Joe Rogan. | ||
| Four million in shot, like me and you are in the yard, like burying money, like a suitcase with hundred-dollar bills falling out of it, and you don't give a Frenchman's fuck. | ||
| I always wanted to know this. | ||
| Snopes this. | ||
| Did Barry Seale die with George Bush's phone number in his pocket? | ||
| That's what they always said. | ||
| And he died. | ||
| They shot him on the way to the trial with George Bush's phone number in his pocket. | ||
| Bro, he was top notch, that guy. | ||
| He had it all. | ||
| He's seen it, bro. | ||
| He took pictures of them loading a fucking plane in Nicaragua with Escobar and the top eight in Nicaragua. | ||
| They had him by the fucking balls. | ||
| No matter what, that took balls. | ||
| Fuck yeah, dude. | ||
| They fucked him in the ass. | ||
| They told him that they wouldn't release the pictures. | ||
| Then they released the pictures, which was douche, and that's why the guy got shot. | ||
| That's fucked up. | ||
| They should have taken him and hidden him. | ||
| He fucked him. | ||
| It's interesting, though. | ||
| They assassinated that guy. | ||
| That's a 100% assassination in connection to some sort of illegal government. | ||
| It was the fucking, what are you talking about? | ||
| That was Escobar that sent up Barry the message. | ||
| They had a deal where Barry Steeles could land though, right? | ||
| Like, it wasn't part of the thing with the people on the ground. | ||
| Right, on the ground. | ||
| That was in Maine, Arkansas, right? | ||
| Now, but here's the problem. | ||
| This is where Eddie Bravo comes in. | ||
| Right. | ||
| They were landing in those Everglades, and don't quote me on this, Eddie broke it down for me and somebody else broke it down for me, to be honest with you. | ||
| And they were allowing that on your boy's clock, Clinton's clock. | ||
| That's the theory. | ||
| That's what Joey Diaz drops out. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know nothing about that. | |
| Let me tell you the truth, because the truth is fascinating. | ||
| The truth is two boys were murdered. | ||
| And the coroner, the official report they gave to the parents was that they had fallen asleep on the train tracks. | ||
| So the parents pay for some sort of an autopsy and it's revealed that the kid had been stabbed and that one of them had been stabbed. | ||
| And then they find out that around that same area was where those guys would drop their drugs before they landed. | ||
| They would parachute down their drugs. | ||
| They would, like, and they would land. | ||
| And these guys, they would drop points where they would put their shit and then someone else would come by and pick it up on the ground. | ||
| Yeah, you had coordinates. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And these kids apparently saw something they weren't supposed to see, so they fucking murdered these kids with knives. | ||
| And then the coroner was all in on it. | ||
| So they had to conduct some sort of independence. | ||
| So that is what got this whole Barry Seals thing going. | ||
| It was this lady trying to figure out, this parent trying to figure out what happened to their kids. | ||
| It's a fucking crazy story. | ||
| You have to imagine, okay, that these guys were getting, you know, let's just draw a number. | ||
| I mean, I'm just an idiot, but let's just draw a number. | ||
| They were probably getting $4,000 per kilo. | ||
| What would they put on those planes? | ||
| And they were sending five of those planes over a day. | ||
| And dropping them into Louisiana. | ||
| Listen, I told you a thousand times in the podcast. | ||
| In 83, they found a bear dead next to a duffel bag filled with cocaine in Aspen, Colorado in the mountains. | ||
| Because they were dropping the fucking coke in the mountains. | ||
| And the bear ate the coke and he fucking OD'd. | ||
| His heart blew up. | ||
| Oh, what does this say? | ||
| Okay, Barry Seal. | ||
| Seal had organized a sting operation where he managed to get photographs of Pablo Escobar helping Nicaraguan soldiers to load 1,200 kilos of cocaine onto a C-123 military plane. | ||
| Soon afterwards, Reagan went on television with a photograph to denounce Sandinistas as drug smuggling, corrupting, dot, dot, dot. | ||
| That's how much he was getting for that fucking load. | ||
| $4,800,000 for one load. | ||
| Now here's the tricky thing. | ||
| Here's what really pisses me the fuck off. | ||
| That I see narcos and I see everything. | ||
| But now, this is your Uncle Joey talking to you, Joe Rogan. | ||
| Please show me the good side of Pablo Escobar. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| There's no good side to Pablo Escobar. | ||
| This ain't Lee Harvey Weinstein. | ||
| This is a story that we have never brought up. | ||
| But you have to assume, okay? | ||
| You see all these shows and the whole fucking thing, and they were in bed for sure with Nicaragua. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Now, who else was in bed with Nicaragua? | ||
| Let me ask you this. | ||
| Do you think that it is the actual CIA? Or is it people? | ||
| Let's not even say CIA. DEA, FBI. I made a bunch of fucking letters, put them together. | ||
| Is it the actual organization, whichever one it is, That's bringing it in. | ||
| Are they complicit? | ||
| Or are they just cowboys? | ||
| See, the theory's always been that there's been these few cowboys, corrupt guys. | ||
| Maybe they get too close to drug deals, too close to the drug deal. | ||
| And then sometimes they get seduced. | ||
| Like, there's many, many stories of undercover cops getting seduced by the actual lifestyle of being a criminal. | ||
| Young kids, they probably did a little crime themselves here or there. | ||
| They see some cops doing some dirty shit. | ||
| They see them some guys, you know. | ||
| There was that thing that came out about, was it Baltimore? | ||
| What is the city where cops came out in trial, they had kept toy guns on them to plant at the scene of a crime? | ||
| Like if they just decided to shoot someone, they plant a fucking toy gun? | ||
| We're talking in a big picture. | ||
| The big world picture, as an intelligent individual as you are, it was plain and simple. | ||
| The CIA wanted a piece of their action, and the DEA was tricked into going down to really control the war. | ||
| You can't be this... | ||
| I'm not saying you. | ||
| As an American, you can't be this dumb. | ||
| After all the research that we've done, all the research that we've done with General North, he was in on the package with Barry Seale, the whole fucking thing. | ||
| And here's where it gets even deeper. | ||
| Let's talk about the deepest subject that nobody ever even looked at. | ||
| And you have to think of, because I heard this story a thousand times. | ||
| There was a guy by the name of Carlos Laidere that he got crazy. | ||
| You know, they show him getting his dick sucked on the radio in Columbia and everything and all these TV shows. | ||
| No. | ||
| He was on an island snorting coke with long hair, talking like Jim Morrison, and having fucking threesomes, and the fucking, their own cartel gave Lader up to the Lalea to keep them off their back. | ||
| It was five partners. | ||
| It's me, you, Jamie, and Red Band. | ||
| But fucking Red Band's out there doing videos of him snorting coke with a fucking pigeon on his head. | ||
| We can't have this. | ||
| They gave the DEA fucking Carlos that calmed things down for a while. | ||
| In 83 and 84, when Reagan sent his troops down there, don't quote me on the dates here, but I will tell you as a professional cocaine sniffer what was going on. | ||
| In 85, the price of cocaine went skyrocketing. | ||
| And it wasn't because of cocaine skyrocketing. | ||
| It was because the cocaine was coming in, but the toughest part was getting the ether alcohol into Colombia to process it. | ||
| The Colombians had got a tip that the troops were coming down to raid their jungles. | ||
| Now, what they have not told you in all these shows and research, but this is what Uncle Joe is going to drop on you, is where do you think they took some labs to Nicaragua, and they shipped cocaine out of Nicaragua. | ||
| But guess who else partnered up with them, too? | ||
| Your buddy Fidel. | ||
| Fidel was shipping it in. | ||
| Yeah, he's gonna be on the podcast in three weeks. | ||
| Can you imagine having Fidel on your podcast? | ||
| You and Fidel, you would translate. | ||
| Oh my god! | ||
| This whole block would have snipers and fucking everybody. | ||
| Fidel just walked in with his suit and you had to teach him like a UFC move and shit. | ||
| Because Fidel would come in and ask you, Senor Rogan, dime como es que usted trabaja aquí? | ||
| Because they were, anyway. | ||
| He was a serious man. | ||
| I'd be very nervous in the presence of a guy like that. | ||
| Laidere said in front of Congress that he was getting $800,000. | ||
| He was giving Fidel $800,000 a shipload. | ||
| To come in under his flag at the time. | ||
| Can you imagine being in the presence of Fidel Castro? | ||
| Just being in his presence. | ||
| Like if he was, you know, in his prime. | ||
| If you're in the room with him in his prime, knowing how he ran Cuba. | ||
| You have no idea. | ||
| How he took it over. | ||
| You have no idea. | ||
| He would be terrifying to be around. | ||
| As a Cuban American, you have to hate the guy. | ||
| I have to hate him, but as a man that thinks, you have to see what his path was. | ||
| Crazy. | ||
| Again, that's where my man T.J. Inglis comes in with Havana Nocturne. | ||
| The revolution, how he started it in three different places at once. | ||
| The revolution, it just wasn't eight monkeys that put on gorilla suits and went to the mountains of Cuba. | ||
| He came to Jersey first, got arrested, went to Tampa, got arrested. | ||
| He was already passing out flyers. | ||
| They always confused Lee Harvey Oswald. | ||
| No, it wasn't Lee Harvey giving out pamphlets. | ||
| It was Fidel Castro giving out pamphlets. | ||
| That's a joke. | ||
| Please don't quote the CIA. It's a joke. | ||
| I'm not ratting you out. | ||
| Fidel Castro was in Union City, New Jersey. | ||
| I can't tell you the dates, but I can have my friend call into the podcast and tell you the story about Fidel talking to his mother on a daily when she would wait to get on the bus. | ||
| She was an Irish girl in Union City. | ||
| And she goes, I knew Fidel in 1952 in Union City. | ||
| Just think of what he did to the Italians. | ||
| He kicked everybody out. | ||
| He didn't give a fuck. | ||
| He goes, I got your casino. | ||
| Your casino's mine now. | ||
| It was a very brilliant move. | ||
| He started in the mountains. | ||
| He fucking... | ||
| He just took all the little villages. | ||
| And then he changed their minds. | ||
| Because first of all, it wasn't an easy thing. | ||
| For them to do. | ||
| Batista was really fucking the country. | ||
| He had really divided the country. | ||
| You have no idea what racism was until you were in Cuba in 1955. Black people weren't allowed in casinos. | ||
| You have no idea. | ||
| These poor people today, everybody's crying about it. | ||
| You have no idea what black rights were in Cuba for those black fucking people. | ||
| They got no rights. | ||
| So those people were poor. | ||
| There was such a high level of... | ||
| You see all these people dancing, but on the other side, There was fucking famine. | ||
| Like, people were fucking dying. | ||
| So they wanted a change. | ||
| Fidel came in there as a hero, first of all. | ||
| He came in as Cuba was gonna change, but then he switched it on him. | ||
| And he aligned with Russia, and he became a communist. | ||
| That's what made it worse. | ||
| That's what made it worse. | ||
| Racism and hunger has always existed in Cuba. | ||
| It did. | ||
| That was the problem. | ||
| That they always showed that party side of Cuba. | ||
| But that other side of the island, bro, there was people starving. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And Batista, come on. | ||
| How did they keep up the tobacco production? | ||
| That I don't know. | ||
| Think of that, Joey. | ||
| Through all that, they had the best cigars in the world. | ||
| But people are complaining now that they're not the same cigars. | ||
| Some people are complaining, but a lot of people are getting frauds, apparently. | ||
| Apparently, when you buy Cuban cigars from untrusty people, you could definitely get some fakes. | ||
| Because now they're talking about how the soil... | ||
| Is it rich? | ||
| Like, people will go there. | ||
| Somebody's an expert. | ||
| Oh, Bobby Kelly. | ||
| Bobby Kelly's a real expert. | ||
| Like, he was on Ari Shafir's podcast. | ||
| They were talking about cigars. | ||
| Bobby Kelly really knows his shit. | ||
| Like, he was going in-depth about how many fake cigars there are and how he could even kind of taste a fake Cuban. | ||
| He smoked so many cigars. | ||
| And he thought maybe one of Ari's was fake. | ||
| He's like, it might be fake. | ||
| And he goes, no, I think this is real. | ||
| I think this is real. | ||
| Like, he's like that discerning about that shit. | ||
| Huh. | ||
| There's a lot of weird freaks when it comes to cigars. | ||
| People are super into them. | ||
| They get you high as fuck, too. | ||
| This is something that people aren't talking about. | ||
| You smoke a cigar, you're like, woo! | ||
| There's so much nicotine in that thing. | ||
| And then you add the Cuban coffee to it. | ||
| That's how the whole process is supposed to go down, with the Cuban coffee and the fucking cigar. | ||
| And you go deep, deep, deep. | ||
| And all you need is a little taste of an edible and a half an alpha brain, and you'll be there. | ||
| You'll get there, Jack. | ||
| Dave Chappelle smokes it sometimes with cigarettes in it. | ||
| We did it the other night in the back of the Comedy Store with cigarettes. | ||
| And I've only done that a couple of times. | ||
| Tobacco and a cigar with THC. Woo! | ||
| You get elevated. | ||
| It was interesting. | ||
| I got one time from San Francisco to Reno. | ||
| One time from San Francisco to Reno, dog, the cops were looking for me in San Francisco. | ||
| And you go down to any of those tourist districts, and they have like a bus that'll take you to Reno. | ||
| So I just jumped on the bus to Reno with this chick. | ||
| And this is 1985, and we're sitting in the bus, and there's this Egyptian kid. | ||
| I'll never forget this. | ||
| And the back of the... | ||
| You could smoke on the bus in those days, cigarettes. | ||
| So he had rolled... | ||
| A blunt with hash, weed, and tobacco in it, guys. | ||
| And I had never done that before, guys. | ||
| I'm not going to lie. | ||
| I had never even... | ||
| I took two hits of that fucking thing, dog. | ||
| I had a puke in that bathroom. | ||
| I got high as fuck. | ||
| But that combination together, the tobacco, the weed, the hash, he had the real hash on him. | ||
| Yeah, that's too much for Uncle Joey. | ||
| That's a bit much for Uncle Joey, Jack. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
| The first time I ever smoked a spliff was with Charlie Murphy. | ||
| Charlie Murphy rolled them. | ||
| His cousin Richard rolled them too. | ||
| He would take Swisher Sweets, old school, you know, any kind of cigar paper, and they would turn it into a joint with the cigar paper. | ||
| Which is like, you inhale weed. | ||
| You never really inhale those cigars. | ||
| You just kind of get them in your mouth, and you taste it, then you blow it out. | ||
| But when you take a drag of weed, you open your lungs up and fill your lungs with the smoke. | ||
| Cigar smoke's too harsh for that. | ||
| You don't smoke it like that for the most part. | ||
| Most people don't. | ||
| But when you do it with pot, you do. | ||
| So you get this crazy blast of nicotine and a crazy blast of weed. | ||
| And you're like, wow! | ||
| It's very different than just weed. | ||
| I think I smoked, yeah, last night on the podcast. | ||
| I took two hits off. | ||
| A friend of mine gave me one of those. | ||
| I like those. | ||
| And it was pretty fucking intense. | ||
| I'm scared of them. | ||
| I'm scared of them. | ||
| I like the ones with cigarettes in them. | ||
| I'm scared. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| I don't want no smoking. | ||
| No, I'm not smoking cigarettes, but the ones with cigarettes in them, it's an interesting little high. | ||
| It's like, ooh, this is a new door to the room. | ||
| It's interesting. | ||
| See, that's what, like, smoking, one of the hardest things I ever gave up was smoking cigarettes after you smoke a joint. | ||
| Right. | ||
| That is just pure brilliance. | ||
| When you hit a fucking joint, and you take a little sip of coffee, and after you smoke that Toots or Doots, you light up a Marlboro, some light. | ||
| It's life fucking changing, bro. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I know a lot of people love them after a real good meal. | |
| Well, it's the whole package. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Is that what it is? | |
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Let me ask you. | ||
| A meal? | ||
| A meal. | ||
| A joint? | ||
| And then a cigarette? | ||
| And then another cigarette and a cup of coffee on top of that and some dessert. | ||
| Then another cigarette? | ||
| You have no fucking idea. | ||
| Cigarettes scare the shit out of me. | ||
| Oh, please. | ||
| They scare the shit out of everybody. | ||
| I can't smoke them. | ||
| Tony's hooked. | ||
|
unidentified
|
My blood pressure will be 2,000 over 80. Tony says he can quit at any time. | |
| No, you cannot. | ||
| No, you cannot. | ||
| I don't think so, little fella. | ||
| And you know what? | ||
| What was the best? | ||
| What I realized was two years ago I shot something and I smoked that night. | ||
| I asked one of the camera guys, let me fucking give me a cigarette. | ||
| And that next morning was when I realized how really fucking bad they are. | ||
| You felt terrible? | ||
| How many did you have? | ||
| One? | ||
| Two. | ||
| Two cigarettes? | ||
| Two Marlboro Lights, and I was fine that night. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You did one night at a comedy club, and I was like, what the fuck is going on? | |
| Every now and then I want to smoke. | ||
| The fuck? | ||
| No, no, I'll never do it again. | ||
| After that night in Chicago, I'll never do it again. | ||
| I took one of Tony's ones before his show. | ||
| It's interesting. | ||
| Cigarettes are interesting. | ||
| It does a weird little thing to your brain. | ||
| Yes, it does. | ||
| Yes, it does. | ||
| One of the reasons why I did it is because I read something about nootropics, talking about different vitamins, like what's good for brain function, and one of the things they said that nicotine, nicotine is actually a nootropic, and that They found that some people under the use of tobacco, with the use of tobacco, they achieve like an elevated state of like certain functions of the brain. | ||
| Like it actually has some sort of a small measurable effect. | ||
| So it really does stimulate the way your brain works. | ||
| See for me it's different. | ||
| It's the combination. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's for me. | ||
| I wouldn't just enjoy right now. | ||
| A cigarette by itself. | ||
| But a cigarette with the weed. | ||
| But if that coffee was brewing hot right now, and it was maybe 60 degrees outside with a little bit of wind and sunlight, you know when you stand out in the sun, you're warm, but when you're in the breeze, you're a little cool? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You go outside, and a good joint of some fucking tremendous reefer with the sun hitting your face, And you take a nice hit of a cigarette, all combined, or even... | ||
| I like what I do. | ||
| I'll do a cup of coffee, I'll pop a fucking number and then a little nicotine gum to give you a little guts, some blood pressure medication on top of that. | ||
| All together, it all works out. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| If you take them apart, nothing really happens. | ||
| I get it. | ||
| But together, that's where you put the mofungo in. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| For me, it's a small shot of Jack Daniels and one to two hits of a joint before a Comedy Store set. | ||
| Tremendous. | ||
| Tremendous. | ||
| Just a little tap. | ||
| To taste, yeah. | ||
| Just a little. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yikes! | |
| One hit is really preferred. | ||
| It's a smart move. | ||
| Two hits is if you're feeling it. | ||
| I did a tequila the other night. | ||
| Three points, not bad. | ||
| Oh, with your Weight Watchers. | ||
| How long are you doing the Weight Watchers? | ||
| I started December 9th. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| I went from 309 to 296 so far. | ||
| That's excellent. | ||
| But you know what, bro? | ||
| Here's the stupid thing, Joe Rogan. | ||
| Here's the dumbest thing in the world. | ||
| I got sick and tired of people saying how clean their diet was. | ||
| You don't know dick until you go to Weight Watchers. | ||
| Listen, you want me to tell you what the new Weight Watchers is? | ||
| You ready? | ||
| It's different? | ||
| It's Mike Dolce. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Chicken breast. | |
| I come to your house tonight and you go, Joey, what do you want? | ||
| Give me two chicken breasts. | ||
| Just a marination. | ||
| I got to watch how you marinate it. | ||
| Who gots? | ||
| Zero points. | ||
| Zero. | ||
| Ogats. | ||
| Beans. | ||
| All types. | ||
| Zero. | ||
| Corn. | ||
| Zero. | ||
| What costs money? | ||
| Or what costs points? | ||
| Beef. | ||
| Beef. | ||
| Beef does. | ||
| Nineteen for- A bunch of limp-aristed pussies over there. | ||
| No, no, no, no, no, no, no. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's what I'm hearing. | |
| But if you look at it- If you look at it, bro, check this out. | ||
| You know, you do jujitsu, 30 minutes, it's 16 fucking points. | ||
| They fit it in. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You get extra points. | |
| You add points. | ||
| See, I tried thinking about it. | ||
| I'm going, wait a second, guys. | ||
| That's smart. | ||
| Wait a second, guys. | ||
| I'm doing kettlebells. | ||
| I'm swinging bats. | ||
| I'm hitting the bag. | ||
| I'm walking around the park. | ||
| I'm still gaining weight. | ||
| Something's not right. | ||
| So it's like the butter. | ||
| I don't use butter no more. | ||
| I could eat my piece of wheat toast. | ||
| With my eggs? | ||
| Oh, you ready for this one? | ||
| You'd be better off the other way. | ||
| Ready for this one? | ||
| You'd be better off throwing away the toast and just eating the butter. | ||
| I gotta have my toast. | ||
| Yeah, but eat the butter. | ||
| Butter's good for you, especially if it's grass-fed butter. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Here's the thing. | |
| I get egg yolks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Egg yolks are great. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I eat egg yolks. | ||
| No egg whites. | ||
| I cut around them. | ||
| You had a bit about that. | ||
| There's a thing in the news yesterday where they were saying that people only eating egg whites is a tremendous health disservice. | ||
| Listen, five years ago, don't take a fucking moron to type. | ||
| Twenty years ago, nobody was getting concussions, nobody was getting soft, nobody was getting their feelings hurt, especially men. | ||
| All of a sudden, I saw people started eating egg whites, and I saw a big rise, and people having a hard time getting their wives pregnant. | ||
| All of a sudden, I saw commercials about erectile dysfunction. | ||
| Men never talked about having... | ||
| Men talked about dog. | ||
| I did some blow the other night, and I didn't get my dick hard. | ||
| Now, all of a sudden, there's a commercial on national TV, on primetime, some fucking guy saying that. | ||
| And also, they started dropping That low testosterone shit. | ||
| And I'm telling you, dog, one thing about Uncle Joey, I've always loved egg yolks. | ||
| I don't even like mixing them. | ||
| I think it's bad for... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| I don't even like scrambled eggs. | ||
| I'll eat them if you make them. | ||
| If you make them nice to me with a little sour cream and a little milk and do it right... | ||
| I like it, but I don't like just prison. | ||
| I got to see the yolk. | ||
| I got a rule. | ||
| When you take me for breakfast, I always got to see the yolk. | ||
| So I cut around it. | ||
| The other day, the waitress said to me, you've been coming here for a long time. | ||
| You do not touch the white. | ||
| And she goes, I mean, you do not touch it. | ||
| I have become like a surgeon with that knife. | ||
| I get the yolk perfectly. | ||
| I take that wheat toast now. | ||
| I don't even eat the whole two slices of wheat toast. | ||
| I only eat a half a wheat toast. | ||
| I take one egg yolk and put it on one side, and I eat the whole thing, like Robert De Niro ate the fucking egg in Angel Heart when he wanted to scare Mickey Rourke. | ||
| That's how I do it. | ||
| I put a piece of bacon in my mouth, and then I take the other piece of wheat toast, put the egg yolk on that. | ||
| I take the other piece of bacon, and I eat my fruit, and that's fucking it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's beautiful. | |
| I gotta eat the egg yolk, though. | ||
| And you could eat three egg yolks, but you could also scramble four eggs, get a tortilla, put black beans in it and salsa. | ||
| All that costs you is the fucking tortilla, dog. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Four points for the tortilla. | ||
| You can have a four-fucking-point breakfast, I need a bowl of fruit, and you're brand-fucking-new, dog. | ||
| It's amazing out here. | ||
| Look at this scene. | ||
| That's a great scene. | ||
| He used the devil with his creepy fingernails, remember? | ||
| De Niro was such a motherfucker. | ||
| These two guys were such motherfuckers. | ||
| It's so funny. | ||
| I'm from Brooklyn. | ||
| How crazy. | ||
| I don't believe in that mumbo jumbo. | ||
| I mean, these guys were the best, man. | ||
| He just told them, do you believe that the egg is the symbol of the soul in some religions? | ||
| Look at him. | ||
| You see how scared he was? | ||
| Phenomenal. | ||
| But his face, when he's eating that egg. | ||
| Show me that again. | ||
| That's a brief, but look at Mickey Rourke's face. | ||
| Mickey Rourke was shitting the pickle. | ||
| He's a handsome fella. | ||
| Poor fucking Mickey Rourke. | ||
| Look at his face. | ||
| Not exaggerated. | ||
| That's the devil. | ||
| That's about as good as a human being is ever gonna do an impression of what the devil would look like if he was a human being. | ||
| Seriously? | ||
| Yeah, he wouldn't be freaking you out. | ||
| Who else played the devil? | ||
| Al Pacino? | ||
| Yeah, Al Pacino! | ||
| When he would do those crazy devil rants! | ||
| He would run around. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Remember? | |
| It was all that, like every movie had to have a rant. | ||
| I'm sick and fucking tired! | ||
| Right? | ||
| He went through a whole period of time where his rants were so powerful. | ||
| They're like, ow, ow, ow. | ||
| Here's where we're gonna put the rant. | ||
| Right here. | ||
| His rants were fucking phenomenal. | ||
| I mean, Al Pacino is Scarface. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I mean, who has more epic screaming rants in film history than Al Pacino? | ||
| I'd say zero people. | ||
| I'm going to tell you something else about Al Pacino. | ||
| Look at him. | ||
| Nobody's hit a bitch as hard ever on TV on Harder Pacino. | ||
| He smacked his sister in Scarface. | ||
| And he smacked that chick in the godfather when she told him she had an abortion. | ||
| Yeah, like really smacked him. | ||
| Yeah, he really had a blast him. | ||
| Dude, it looks scary. | ||
| Like, he looks like he hit her. | ||
| Like, it looks like if you're an actress and you never got hit like that before, you'd be like, oh my god. | ||
| Remember Steve McGreen and Ally McGraw? | ||
| Yeah, that was real. | ||
| That was real. | ||
| That wasn't even supposed to be in the scene, right? | ||
| No, he smacked her just out of principle. | ||
| Have you ever seen that scene, Jamie? | ||
|
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|
I think we should have. | |
| Oh, we showed it before. | ||
| We are so repetitive. | ||
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| That's weed, folks. | ||
| That's what you get. | ||
| You get the fun stuff, but you also get shit memory of about a thousand million hours. | ||
| I also heard that fucking De Niro played a good Dracula. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| No, Gary Oldman. | ||
| No, no, Gary Oldman. | ||
| I'm very sorry. | ||
| No, but didn't De Niro play the Dracula in something? | ||
| No, he played Frankenstein. | ||
| De Niro played Frankenstein once. | ||
| Was he any good? | ||
| That was a terrible movie. | ||
| It was one of those ones where you're like, wait, what? | ||
| It was weird. | ||
| Actually, he was pretty good as a monster, though. | ||
| These are all the actors that played the devil in different movies. | ||
| What was Kaiser Sosa? | ||
| He wasn't the devil, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Was he? | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Wow, a lot of people. | ||
| Jennifer Love Hewitt played the devil? | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| John Ritter played the devil. | ||
| John Ritter did a couple episodes of news radio. | ||
| Look at that dude. | ||
| At least one. | ||
| Hold on, hold on. | ||
| Look at Vincent Price, bro. | ||
| Vincent Price was fucking just amazing. | ||
| He really was, man. | ||
| Some of those movies, he did like two movies that really scared the shit out of me. | ||
| Yeah, what did he do? | ||
| Which movies did he do? | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| There were two movies. | ||
| I'm trying to remember. | ||
| There was a lot of really fun movies back then that if you watch today, you're like, what the fuck was I thinking? | ||
| He was definitely on Batman, right? | ||
| What was he on Batman? | ||
| House on Haunted Hill. | ||
| There's his thing. | ||
| House of Wax. | ||
| That was a big one. | ||
| House of Wax was a big one. | ||
| The Last Man on Earth. | ||
| He was always thought of as that real, good, creepy actor guy who's good in scary movies. | ||
| What's his IMDB? I wonder if he was in Batman. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| I wonder if he was in Batman. | ||
| He was in something. | ||
| Isn't it funny how a guy gets synonymous with a genre of movies? | ||
| Like Vincent Price, you think of it, oh, scary movies. | ||
| There's a few guys like that. | ||
| You think of their name, oh, scary movie. | ||
| John Romero, scary movie. | ||
| Dawn of the Dead. | ||
| That's film. | ||
| No TV on there? | ||
| That's his name, right? | ||
| John Romero? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, exactly. | |
| No, John Romero did what? | ||
| George Romero. | ||
| John Romero is a guy who was a game developer in the early days of Doom. | ||
| He was with id Software. | ||
| Like Doom and Quake and those kind of games. | ||
| Now, George Romero was the guy that... | ||
| On paper, officially started this whole zombie fucking shit. | ||
| Pretty much, right? | ||
| When we were kids, he had Dawn of the Dead and the other one. | ||
| Dog, he has a scene in one of those. | ||
| It had to be 1975. I was maybe 12 years old, maybe 13. One of those came out. | ||
| And we took a hit of acid. | ||
| And we all went to the movie theater on a Saturday, take the number one bus to Jersey City, and they would play two of these movies. | ||
| Dawn of the Dead and something else creepy. | ||
| Night of the Living Dead. | ||
| Or something fucking creeped out. | ||
| Night of the Living Dead was the first one. | ||
| And there's one scene where the black guy's going for the helicopter and he just chops his head off. | ||
| Jesus fucking Christ, that I run out of there. | ||
| Those both movies were scared of the living. | ||
| I don't know how many times I took the number one bus to go to Jersey City to the Journal Square. | ||
| There was a movie theater, that's where I saw Richard Pryor live at the Sunset Strip the first time on a Friday night. | ||
| I got stabbed. | ||
| Jesus Christ, you got stabbed? | ||
| I got caught, I still got the scar. | ||
| That's where I saw the Pink Panther movies. | ||
| That was my first genre into getting high. | ||
| And go into the movies. | ||
| Like, I knew I couldn't go to the movies in North Perkins or Union City because I'd bump into one of my mother's friends or something. | ||
| So me and my little goombas figured out if we went to Jersey City, we could get on the bus, cause a little drama, get a six-pack, split it four ways, and smoke a joint and go into those movies and giggle and act like an asshole. | ||
| We also went down to see the Groove Tube and Kentucky Fried movie. | ||
| Kentucky Fried Movie was a genre that started before Saturday Night Live. | ||
| And there was a movie put together by a bunch of sketches. | ||
| But one of the famous sketches is they're in a courtroom. | ||
| And, uh... | ||
| And there's a gorilla fucking people up. | ||
| Yeah, they would just say different stupid things. | ||
| And the fucking guy got... | ||
| Yeah, there was nudity. | ||
| They had titties. | ||
| Yeah, they didn't fuck around. | ||
| You could never do this movie today. | ||
| It's on YouTube, by the way. | ||
| This was on HBO when we were kids. | ||
| Don't be a rat, Jamie. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whatever. | |
| Oh my God, look at this. | ||
| Yeah, this was on HBO. So you had to talk your mother into getting HBO because GrooveTube or Kentucky Fried Movie was going to be on. | ||
| And they were hilarious. | ||
| You could never have this movie today. | ||
| Yes, you could. | ||
| I'm getting triggered. | ||
| Yes, you could. | ||
| You could do this movie. | ||
| They don't have the balls to do this movie today. | ||
| Girls are getting pied in the ass. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Look at this shit. | ||
| This is crazy. | ||
| You could never do this in a movie today. | ||
| In a regular movie, they would never allow that. | ||
| Catholic high school girls in trouble, and the guy's banging a girl in the shower, and you see her tits pressing up against the glass. | ||
| Legitimately seeing everything. | ||
| American Pie was not... | ||
| I mean, it's not a sketch thing, but it wasn't too far different. | ||
| No, but even American Pie, I think you'd struggle to do that now. | ||
| I think the climate shifted so hard. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| There's still a part of America that loves this type of humor. | ||
| Joe Rogan, no. | ||
| Do you know they took F1 grid girls out of Formula 1 racing? | ||
| The grid girls? | ||
| Like, hot women? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| They took them out, and now they're petitioning to take Octagon girls out. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| And ring card girls. | ||
| They're saying, like, we need to stop this. | ||
| They're like, what are you talking about? | ||
| This is how we make a living, stupid. | ||
| Like, what? | ||
| It's the objectification of women. | ||
| I think if you can have Chippendales, and you can have, I think you should have ring card boys. | ||
| See who gets hired. | ||
| Joey, what happened? | ||
| These people are crazy. | ||
| People are losing their mind. | ||
| You made a point the other day with those two young men that, and I don't want to quote you, you said something about that somebody got mad at people with their vagina hats. | ||
| Black women are mad at vagina hats. | ||
| Transgender supporters were mad because it represents the Women's March and not everyone who's a woman has a vagina. | ||
| That was their upset that it's transphobic. | ||
| I'm fucking as much as an American as you are, I'm fucking done. | ||
| I'm done. | ||
| I'm done. | ||
| I don't know what else to do anymore. | ||
| I mean, three months ago, some guy came out with a brilliant movie, Stephen King, that scared everybody. | ||
| Did he not? | ||
| It was the number one film about a clown. | ||
| And all of a sudden, there was a parade. | ||
| You know, they got together. | ||
| Clowns marched in protection of clowns because ever since that movie came out, a bunch of clowns lost their jobs. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| In the spring. | ||
| Like, they were booked for the fall. | ||
| So they, you know, we're getting to something now that's just totally out of control. | ||
| I read the Amy Schumer thing with Anzi Ansari. | ||
| I read... | ||
| You know, you try to not avoid everything, but it's right in front of you. | ||
| Every day there's something else. | ||
| You're just waiting for the fucking shoe to drop every day. | ||
| I am going to continue to be who I am, Joe Rogan, on stage and on stage. | ||
| I don't really give a fuck about sensitivity. | ||
| I can't. | ||
| I'm a stand-up. | ||
| I don't have time. | ||
| I feel you. | ||
| I think about it. | ||
| I also watched a podcast of you with Brendan and Brian, and you talked about something that didn't happen to me. | ||
| No, no. | ||
| It did happen to me, where I was at a children's school at a fair, and I tried to turn it into a bid. | ||
| I just couldn't sell it. | ||
| To be funny, a kid was playing in front of me and I could tell there was something not right with the child. | ||
| And some other child called him a faggot. | ||
| And the kid's mother came up and she goes, he's not a faggot, he's a transgender. | ||
| And then the mother came up to me, I'm high as fuck. | ||
| How old were you? | ||
| This is three months ago. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| This is three months ago at a park. | ||
| You know, before you go to those events, you get tuned up, and you put Visine in your eyes, and you go down there, and you try to be as nice as you can as a parent, but you try to avoid talking to a lot of people. | ||
| Your wife does all the talking. | ||
| You just sit there and wave to people. | ||
| Hi, how are you? | ||
| Who do you think is going to win Machida? | ||
| Yeah, Machida. | ||
| And you're just watching the girls. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I'm saying? | |
| You try to do that, but there's always something at those events that you get back in the car with your wife and go, Mrs. Rogan, what the fuck was that about? | ||
| And then they'll break it down for you. | ||
| Tell me I'm lying to you. | ||
| At every fucking thing, it's like you were talking about the people believing the earth, that there was no Adam and Eve. | ||
| That's what I'm starting to, when you were telling that bit, I didn't know what the fuck you were talking about. | ||
| I go, who does he hang out with? | ||
| This is What's he hanging out with this poor bastard? | ||
| But now that I have a child that's five, I'm getting out to see different people's views that are my age. | ||
| And this lady came up to me and gave me a whole ear beat. | ||
| How the kid is 15, they have him on medication, and he's known he was a woman since he was nine. | ||
| But then she fucked up Joe Rogan. | ||
| She said she always wanted a girl anyway. | ||
| Oh, Jesus. | ||
| But you guys are talking about something about there was somebody that got in trouble for a three-year-old giving them blockers. | ||
| I don't know nothing about that world. | ||
| I know nothing. | ||
| Owen Benjamin got in trouble. | ||
| Got fired from his agency. | ||
| They dropped him because he was tweeting a bunch of shit about someone using hormone blockers on a three-year-old. | ||
| He's like, this is crazy. | ||
| What I listened to that day and where I live, I thought my head was going to blow up. | ||
| And when she came over and explained why he was going to be a... | ||
|
unidentified
|
And again, I have nothing against transgenders or anything. | |
| Here's my thing. | ||
| If a kid is behaving a certain way... | ||
| Let him keep behaving that way. | ||
| You don't have to fucking throw hormones in the mix. | ||
| You don't even know what's gonna happen when you do that. | ||
| You're gonna change who he is. | ||
| So you're telling me that he has this urge to take hormones that are not native in his body in the same amount. | ||
| He's this urge to do this, so we should just let him do it. | ||
| No, he has an urge to be identified as a woman. | ||
| Like, you don't even have to do anything to do that. | ||
| If you just decide you identify as a woman. | ||
| Most people are going to be cool with it. | ||
| We're saying that a child has to take some chemicals in the middle of their developmental cycle. | ||
| This is the only way we can do this. | ||
| This is the smart way? | ||
| This is the smart way. | ||
| When they're 6 or 16 or whatever it is. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| That doesn't make sense from a developmental standpoint. | ||
| I'm not a scientist, but I understand enough about the stages that the human being goes through before it reaches adulthood. | ||
| You're not really completely formed until you're 20 years old or 25 years old or something like that. | ||
| It's like the frontal cortex doesn't form until you're 25. So your decision making is always a little weird until you're about 25. Who the fuck knows what the fuck they want to be at 15 or 16? | ||
|
unidentified
|
But you definitely don't know at 6 or at 3. No. | |
| That's crazy. | ||
| She said that he knew at 9. Come on. | ||
| And I went home and I told my wife. | ||
| My wife said, well, you got to watch a show every week on A&E. There's a show about kids that want to, you know, make the job. | ||
| Listen, it doesn't matter. | ||
| It's just that I'm trying to tell you that I'm finding out about shit now that... | ||
| But you know what's weird? | ||
| If someone feels a certain way, they feel they are a certain way, why do they have to take chemicals to achieve a new state? | ||
| They identify with being a woman, so they have to take chemicals to reach this state. | ||
| I think, man, if I was a person who was a transgender person listening to me talk, I'd be like, shut the fuck up, you don't know shit about that. | ||
| I bet a lot of you cheered. | ||
| If you're listening to this. | ||
| But all I'm saying is that this is a very unusual situation. | ||
| It's very unusual. | ||
| I don't think it's a bad thing, but I think that... | ||
| Doing it to someone who really can't fully make up their mind yet just seems insanely risky, and what could happen to the kid could be terrible. | ||
| And people have made successful transitions when they transitioned in their 30s. | ||
| You don't have to do it when you're 6. If you want to be a transgender person in your 30s, Sure, or your 20s, or whenever we decide that a human being is rationally capable of making full-life decisions that are as dramatic as that. | ||
| That's what I thought that day. | ||
| I was like, who the fuck makes a good decision at 16? | ||
| Nobody does, man. | ||
| Or at 21 or 25? | ||
| But that doesn't mean that someone at 16 who thinks they're a woman couldn't Absolutely become one later and be super happy with it. | ||
| I'm not saying that's not possible either. | ||
| Everything's possible. | ||
| There's a thing for everybody. | ||
| And if that is what you feel like is your thing, you want to be that. | ||
| It's who you identify with. | ||
| And you have every right. | ||
| You have every right to do that. | ||
| So what you're saying, bro, you know how many fucking drugs I did between 16 and 20? | ||
|
unidentified
|
A lot. | |
| It's not funny. | ||
| You did a lot of drugs from the time I met you. | ||
| The fact that you were on a heavier schedule before that. | ||
| No, but I'm talking about, like, I tried to stay away. | ||
| Like, I was a karate guy like you. | ||
| And the kids from karate, on Saturdays, they were geeks. | ||
| We either went to a martial art festival, we competed, or we went to a karate movie, or we went to a Honda martial arts supply. | ||
| I remember those places. | ||
| So we saved our money. | ||
| Like, you want to go to the movies and see the five deadly hands? | ||
| Nah, nah. | ||
| We got to save our money. | ||
| We're going to Honda next week to buy a Caboodle Tonfa. | ||
| Like we would always buy the ones that you'd hold with the... | ||
| Just so you know, I don't fuck around with your money. | ||
| What are you drawing? | ||
| What are you drawing? | ||
| You know how to write Chinese letters? | ||
| Yeah, if you look at those old Chinese things, they all had this on it. | ||
| That's how you wrote karate. | ||
| That's how you wrote karate, like that. | ||
| I knew all about this. | ||
| You would buy the handle that I would hold. | ||
| Remember the ones where you were in taekwondo and they had the wood in the top and they had four inches of canvas and you would stand in front of it and you would beat a makiwara and it would have like your knuckles. | ||
| These guys would really condition their knuckles. | ||
| We would save our money. | ||
| We were geeks. | ||
| That's what we did at 12. But they had little goombas in my neighborhood and when they were 12 they did something completely different. | ||
| They went behind the school, and they would roll one joint and put it in a piece of glass tube and light it up, and we would drink Boone's Farm. | ||
| The fruit shit, and I'd get pukey, so I didn't know who to hang out with, so I would have to be like a double agent. | ||
| That was a tough job for me as a 12-year-old. | ||
| I liked hanging out with my karate geeks. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| I like going to competitions. | ||
| I like doing forms. | ||
| I like doing the semi-contact competitions where you couldn't kick above the head. | ||
| Yeah, those are good for kids. | ||
| But you don't like it anyway, but you still kick the kid and get disqualified. | ||
| But fuck it, I kicked him in the jaw. | ||
| Did you see? | ||
| People did that. | ||
| This in life was simple for me. | ||
| So I had to make a decision because the Kung Fu kids didn't get no pussy. | ||
| They just weren't into pussy. | ||
| They would talk about girls and they maybe had a crush on the girl in the 430 class, but they never asked her to come to any of the events. | ||
| My other buddies were into pussy. | ||
| So eventually I cut the karate fucking geeks out, and I started hanging out with the little druggies, and you make your transition. | ||
| And from those developmental ages, like, I tried to hide my drug use. | ||
| I tried to hide it, especially the marijuana use. | ||
| For two or three years it was just marijuana. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Then once I became a freshman, I didn't start basketball my freshman year, I decided to, let's venture out into this acid thing. | ||
| Let's venture out into this mescaline thing. | ||
| It was a different name. | ||
| It was mescaline, but it really wasn't mescaline Joe Rogan. | ||
| It was a little tablet. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Peyote? | |
| No, it wasn't even peyote. | ||
| It was a little thing. | ||
| Aren't they the same? | ||
| Excuse me, peyote, yeah, yeah, but mescaline is what they sell you in the south. | ||
| They supposedly put it in tequila or something. | ||
| That's mescal, right? | ||
| Yeah, this is something that two little fucking white kids made in a pill. | ||
| It was rat poison with something else and something else, and it was very tiny. | ||
| It was maybe the little size of this. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| And it came in aluminum foil, even smaller than that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Even smaller than that. | ||
| Way smaller. | ||
| That little thing, that's it. | ||
| You paid $80 for it, and you got 100 of those, and you sold it for $3 a piece. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And that would fuck you up for six hours with a two-hour haze in between. | ||
| An hour buffer and an hour to come down. | ||
| And I did that for three or four months. | ||
| Then they introduced me to THC Crystal, which is snorty. | ||
| They sold it as... | ||
| What we do is we get a bunch of stems and seeds from the reefer. | ||
| We put it in a pot and we boil that pot. | ||
| And whatever separates from the stems and the seeds that goes to the sides, we scrape that off, and that's where you snort in your nose. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| So I was... | ||
| I had like a personal karate rule that I would always just smoke it and do the mescaline, but I was never going to put nothing in my nose. | ||
| Oh, you had a rule like a drug addict put something in their nose. | ||
| Right, like that's it. | ||
| That's a complete different range. | ||
| I'll never shoot heroin and I'll never put nothing in my nose. | ||
| Especially as a karate man. | ||
| As a karate man, I had karate morals. | ||
| I was just straight away with the reefer. | ||
| And then I finally ended up snorting that fucking Gorilla Biscuit shit. | ||
| Because that's what it was. | ||
| It was angel dust. | ||
| They just told you. | ||
| And I went on an angel dust tear. | ||
| Like every Sunday, me and my friend Carlos Perez would buy a six-pack of Michael Loeb. | ||
| He only liked Michelob. | ||
| He has two good friends. | ||
| Tonight is kind of special. | ||
| The beer will pour. | ||
| Must say something more. | ||
| Call it tonight. | ||
| Oh, that's Lone Brow. | ||
| Yeah, Lone Brow. | ||
| What were we talking about? | ||
| Michelob? | ||
| Michelob, no. | ||
| Different one, right? | ||
| We would drink Lone Brow. | ||
| Lone Brow. | ||
| Oh, that one. | ||
| We would get a six-pack of low-brow and fucking snort a $10 package of THC crystal. | ||
| My mother would go to the track on Sundays, so I knew she wouldn't come back till 7. So me and him would snort it. | ||
| As soon as my mother stepped foot in that car at 11, me and him would have it and we'd snort it and then fucking... | ||
| Just sit around like and be fucking zombies all day. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But that was a development. | ||
| And then I went after my mom died. | ||
| I just went on an acid tear for fucking a year. | ||
| All different types of... | ||
| God knows what was in those goddamn things. | ||
| God fucking knows. | ||
| What's going on here? | ||
| Oh, this is the... | ||
| Look at this commercial! | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| Look at that guy. | ||
| How about a low and brown? | ||
| Wow! | ||
| This is like a sketch. | ||
| It's a truly great American beer. | ||
| Why doesn't it have an American name, motherfucker? | ||
| What are you, embarrassed? | ||
| Are you embarrassed to be from here? | ||
| American beer low and brown. | ||
| Fucking Lohenbrow. | ||
| We used to drink Lohenbrows and shit. | ||
| Actually, it is an American beer, right? | ||
| That's like Stipe Miocic. | ||
| Keep your fucking real name. | ||
| That's as American as it gets, right? | ||
| Is it still around? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Lohenbrow? | ||
| I don't know, but if they said Lohenbrow, if that was their name and they started the beer company and they didn't change their name, that's as American as it gets. | ||
| So I'm wrong. | ||
| I should shut the fuck up. | ||
| Even looking it up, it's a German brewery. | ||
| Liars! | ||
|
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|
Liars! | |
| Lying about American-made. | ||
| Apparently, they make a lot of American plants, make a lot of cars now that you think are Japanese cars. | ||
| Like Toyota Tundras. | ||
| They make them in Texas. | ||
| They make a bunch of them in Ohio, too. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Hondas, Nissans. | ||
| That's weird, right? | ||
| Like, if you think you're buying a Honda, you think you're definitely buying a Japanese car. | ||
| If you think you're buying some American cars, it might be a Mexican car. | ||
| How crazy is that? | ||
| Like, what company's making their cars down in Mexico? | ||
| I think they closed a couple plants. | ||
| I think Toyota was down there and somebody else for a while. | ||
| But here's the thing. | ||
| If they put them down in Mexico, but they gave them American money, like the levels of American money that's in Mexico, they would stop doing it. | ||
| It's a lot, actually. | ||
| Wow, look at all these different ones. | ||
| Chrysler has three plants, Ford has three plants, GM has four plants, Mazda has one. | ||
| They do it down there because it's cheaper, which I guess they have to do what they've got to do, and I'm sure it helps the community, because I know it does. | ||
| I know people that have had manufacturing down in these countries, and they do it for the cheap, but it does help the people. | ||
| There's some places that don't have much. | ||
| But what's arguable is, like, why is living like a Western person so important when these people have been living their own way for thousands of years? | ||
| They just didn't have... | ||
| Like, all the crazy infrastructure and all the shit that we had, they didn't have the crazy cities and, you know, other than a few cities in Mexico, like Mexico City. | ||
| So if they would go and put these plants in, like, why is it doing, I mean, I'm all for people being able to work, but is that better? | ||
| Is that better than the way they were living before? | ||
| When they were living like indigenous people, or living like villagers, or living like trades people, or whatever they did to get by? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Maybe it is better. | ||
| Let's go back to the whole situation here. | ||
| I still remember, because I'm a little older than you, I still remember where it was kind of starting to get taboo if you bought a foreign car. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm that old, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| I remember that. | ||
| I still remember the mid-70s. | ||
| I still remember when Toyota advertised or Nissan advertised the car for 1995. And I would go, wait a second, I got $40 in the bank. | ||
| I could buy one of those. | ||
| It was $1,900, stupid, like a Corolla or something. | ||
| And I still remember there was a time in this country when if you were the first person on this block, if you showed up with a foreign car, you got a little bit of grief. | ||
| You got a little bit of grief. | ||
| And then it felt like they sold themselves. | ||
| It felt like we dropped the ball at some point. | ||
| As Americans, as you know, I don't know what happened in Detroit and all that stuff. | ||
| I know that, where's the highest population to Puerto Rico in this country? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| You think it's the Bronx, but it's not. | ||
| It's a suburb outside of Cleveland. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Because in the 50s, they took a bunch of Puerto Ricans and put them into the suburb to work at the car plants. | ||
| All the car plants shut down there. | ||
| We ended up going other places and whatever and blah, blah, blah and blah, blah, blah. | ||
| And then the foreign cars started kicking our fucking ass. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Again, I don't know. | ||
| Was it the workmanship? | ||
| Was it the quality? | ||
| All I know is if I got a fucking Toyota, I could drive it for 80,000 miles without stopping to get gas. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Right. | ||
| You, as a consumer, as an American, you want to buy American products and you want to buy American-made products. | ||
| You know, so there's a couple places now, like beside Mexico, where we have places now, like in Indiana, we have like Toyota has a couple places, and they should bring it back. | ||
| I mean, fuck it. | ||
| Let some, you know, so we trade. | ||
| We get some of Toyota's stuff, which is, what kind of car are they? | ||
| They're Japanese or Chinese? | ||
| They're Japanese. | ||
| Japanese. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And let some of our shit get made over there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's part of, is it NAFTA? That's North American. | |
| North American Free Trade Agreement. | ||
| So, I don't know. | ||
| That's just, I think, I think, I'm just talking on my ass here, but I think that's just us, Mexico, and Canada. | ||
| So when we build a car in Mexico, it's a lot cheaper to develop that car because of the rate? | ||
| Yeah, they pay people less. | ||
| They pay people less. | ||
| It's cheaper to get land. | ||
| These people don't have anything else going on down there or not as much going on down there, obviously, as they do in America and some heavily populated cities. | ||
| And so they can offer people much less money. | ||
| And there's a lot of plants that do that. | ||
| That's funny. | ||
| But here's the thing. | ||
| The real question is, do you think that this is just going to elevate these people and they're eventually going to catch up with the Western world and live the way that we're living right now in the United States? | ||
| There's ultimately a possibility of that. | ||
| Or are we saying, well, we're always going to have these people that we treat less good, and we're just always going to keep them in that position. | ||
| They're never going to get any better. | ||
| I mean, which one is it? | ||
| It's either one of those two things or, I mean, it could possibly be that people just want shit cheaper so bad they don't care. | ||
| They don't care. | ||
| They don't care if a guy's making a dollar a week or whatever the fuck they make. | ||
| How much do they make? | ||
| If you had to guess. | ||
| If you guess, how much does someone in an automobile plant in Mexico make as opposed to an American worker? | ||
| I'm sure someone must have done some sort of a study. | ||
| It's weird, man, because if they were doing the exact same thing on this patch of dirt, we'd go, what? | ||
| You can't pay that little. | ||
| Then you say, oh, but down there, everything's cheaper. | ||
| And they're giving these people an opportunity. | ||
| Like, why is it better? | ||
| Here's the question. | ||
| Why is it better than the way they've always been living? | ||
| In Mexico, $2 per hour workers make $40,000 SUVs. | ||
| $2 an hour. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Do you imagine a person working all day and you hand them $16? | ||
| You, sir, are a piece of shit. | ||
| Could you imagine? | ||
| A guy busts his ass on an assembly line all day. | ||
| You give him $16. | ||
| Fuck you. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| Start at $1.10 an hour. | ||
| Oh my god, a dollar an hour. | ||
| You make more in prison. | ||
| That is ridiculous. | ||
| And that's Mexican money or that's American money? | ||
| A dollar a day, two dollars an hour. | ||
| Maybe it's like the translated... | ||
| Joe, we're getting fucked with more labels. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's insane. | |
| But it's just... | ||
| The idea is that you've got to always be able to make more money. | ||
| These people have this idea in a lot of these corporations of unlimited growth. | ||
| They just want to constantly be growing, growing, growing. | ||
| Some people think it's a very dangerous idea because your bottom line for your company is to always outdo every quarter. | ||
| At a certain time, people start getting desperate. | ||
| And they start cutting environmental corners or cutting research corners or doing whatever the fuck they have to do to keep their bottom line down and keep their profits coming in. | ||
| And that's what you could say about, like, these prescription drug companies. | ||
| People want to think that these companies are evil. | ||
| They're companies. | ||
| Their job is to make money, okay? | ||
| And they're caught up in a storm where they're allowed to make legal money. | ||
| And this legal money is... | ||
| Fucking substantial. | ||
| It's a giant amount of money these pharmaceutical companies are making on opiates. | ||
| So people are dying left and right, Joey. | ||
| Left and right. | ||
| This is one of the craziest, unspoken epidemics the human race has seen. | ||
| Joe Rogan, how long I know you. | ||
| Forever. | ||
| I'll tell you the truth on everything. | ||
| I still talk to my drug dealers. | ||
| They were good to me when I needed them. | ||
| And from month to month, I still talk to the Armenian. | ||
| And I still talk to Don Sleazy. | ||
| In fact, Don Sleazy just did a big movie. | ||
| He got a couple lines in a big movie. | ||
| That's awesome. | ||
| They do what they do. | ||
| I do what I do. | ||
| I have a family. | ||
| I got a call from the Armenian. | ||
| I saw him at Rouse. | ||
| You have a bit you used to do about the Armenians? | ||
| That's one of my favorite bits. | ||
| I saw the Armenian at Rouse. | ||
| He gave me a hug. | ||
| I saw him with his kids. | ||
| The kids are huge now. | ||
| You don't know how many times I met him with his kids and he would put an eight ball in my head. | ||
| I've been in that position. | ||
| So now I had groceries and I hugged him and he goes, do you mind if I call you later? | ||
| You know, and I go, sure, call me, whatever you want. | ||
| And he goes, where do you live? | ||
| And I told him, and he goes, I live here. | ||
| Can I meet you? | ||
| I want to ask you a question. | ||
| I didn't know. | ||
| I thought he was going to ask me if I still did blow. | ||
| I didn't know. | ||
| You know, I'm good. | ||
| I'm good. | ||
| And when I went to meet him, what he wanted to know was, he goes, you're a comedian, and I just wanted to ask if you knew anybody who got pills. | ||
| And I go, I got Xanax at the house. | ||
| You're free to take him. | ||
| He goes, no, no, no, no. | ||
| I'm tucking pain, oxy, whatever. | ||
| Again, I shook his hand. | ||
| I gave him a hug. | ||
| Joe Rogan, I don't know nobody. | ||
| I don't know anybody. | ||
| A week later, I told him I'd ask. | ||
| Because I do know a guy, kind of, sort of, a white dude in Hollywood. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And I called him, like, a week later, the Armenian called me, and I go, you know, I'm sorry, hold on. | ||
| And I went and I looked and I called this white dude, and he called me back, and he said, give me a couple days, you know. | ||
| And he called me back, and what he told me was mind-boggling. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What did he tell you? | |
| The prices. | ||
| How much he's getting? | ||
| Of what you pay for pharmaceutical. | ||
| He hit me back and he told me three numbers on the phone with three different names of what this guy had. | ||
| And I'm not a drug dealer. | ||
| I called the Armenian and I just said, listen, this is what he told me and this is what he wants. | ||
| And the guy goes, okay, you don't tell him in a week I'll get a thousand of them. | ||
| I could not believe the amount of money for these pills. | ||
| Really? | ||
| You know, I never was a big pill head, but oh my god. | ||
| The black market for pills is fucking ginormous. | ||
| And I knew this kid in Hollywood would come through. | ||
| I know him 15 years. | ||
| He's a big jujitsu guy. | ||
| Well, they opened up a door and they can't close it. | ||
| It is mind-boggling what you pay for pills. | ||
| Well, you know what happened, right? | ||
| You know where it all started? | ||
| Well, this is what happened. | ||
| First of all, they're obviously very addictive. | ||
| Second of all, something happened in Florida where they allowed people to get multiple prescriptions. | ||
| Pain clinics everywhere. | ||
| It was basically what off-track betting is for gambling. | ||
| That was heroin sales. | ||
| It was just heroin sales. | ||
| Showy. | ||
| Everybody's got an ache. | ||
| You know, sometimes my fucking neck bothers me after a couple of podcasts. | ||
| I need to get a little oxy. | ||
| My back just, I can't sleep. | ||
| Here you go. | ||
| Have some oxy. | ||
| They would have a pharmacy attached to a doctor's office. | ||
| A town of 3,200 was flooded with nearly 21 million pain pills as addiction crisis worsened, lawmakers say. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| A town of 3,200 people was flooded with 21 million pain pills. | ||
| A town of West Virginia. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| People in those towns, like from the wild and wonderful Wests of West Virginia. | ||
| What is that? | ||
| The whites of West Virginia. | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| Wild and wonderful whites of West Virginia. | ||
| Oxys, Xanax, whatever the fuck you got. | ||
| No, I got the little ones. | ||
| I got the little ones for anxiety. | ||
| You know, when I get anxiety, I get them lately before I get... | ||
| Like, if I haven't gone on the road for a while... | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| ...that Thursday morning, oh, my God, Joe Rogan, as I'm getting ready, I keep thinking, like, I'm fucking not packing right. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I forgot something. | ||
| I forgot the holes in sleep at me, and I've been biting half of it. | ||
| And you know what? | ||
| I even fall asleep. | ||
| I get on the plane, I fall asleep, but on the road, people give me weird, creepy things. | ||
|
unidentified
|
LAUGHTER And it's hilarious. | |
| So now I just go to WebDemD and you look for pill indicator. | ||
| And if it's something good, I'll save it. | ||
| And at least I got it. | ||
| If I ever have an emergency, if I'm lonely one night or something, you pop all these little pills on the, you know. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| But when dog, when they told me to, like I knew when I was a kid I would go to Washington Square Park and I could get eight, ten milligram Valium with the V in the middle. | ||
| That's the real deal when you get a fucking pill and they got a V in the middle cut out. | ||
| That's the shit. | ||
| Those are the Mac Daddies. | ||
| I could get eight of those for $10 and they were 10 milligrams. | ||
| Here's the question. | ||
| Do you think if it was legal, more or less people would have used it or the same? | ||
| Why are you? | ||
| What is this? | ||
| Trick points? | ||
| No, I'm curious. | ||
| I'm curious what you think. | ||
| Gambling, drugs, pills. | ||
| You give people the green light, dog. | ||
| We're fucking creatures of habit. | ||
| We're all going to fucking go. | ||
| Some of us are going to control it. | ||
| Listen, there's some people that get knee surgery and neck surgery like yourself. | ||
| And you've thrown away the Vicodin. | ||
| And there's other people that take that prescription. | ||
| And two years later, they're shooting heroin. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't understand it. | ||
| I think people feel pain different. | ||
| We all have different holes in our genes, bro. | ||
| Well, there's some people that like pain. | ||
| I'm not one of them, but there's some people that genuinely like it. | ||
| They get pleasure out of it. | ||
| What kind of pain do you like? | ||
| I mean, what kind of pain? | ||
| A dick up your ass? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| This is the question. | ||
| I think they think there are syndromes where, and it's probably fairly common in terms of it's not just one person. | ||
| It's like several people that could point out that experience actual like pleasure, like a serotonin burst from certain amounts of pain. | ||
| I don't think they feel it the way we feel it. | ||
| And so they're always trying to do things to themselves, and they say that some of the people that get a lot of piercings have that. | ||
| Some people that get a lot of tattoos have that. | ||
| They want to feel it more, so they want to burn it into themselves. | ||
| And I'm obviously not a psychologist, but it's apparently a pretty common theory. | ||
| Another thing I want to talk to you about, I watched the podcast. | ||
| I can't believe I have to say I'm not a psychologist. | ||
| I watched the podcast where you were talking about, because I wanted to really tell you the truth, the podcast where you were talking about that maybe some of Jon Jones' actions were caused by head injuries. | ||
| Could easily have been. | ||
| I'll tell you what. | ||
| Not caused by. | ||
| Not caused by. | ||
| Could easily have been. | ||
| Could be a fact. | ||
| I got to tell you something, Joe Rogan. | ||
| Again, let's go back to abuse from gambling or pills. | ||
| The mind with cocaine is a very tricky mind. | ||
| Oh yeah. | ||
| And it takes a year off. | ||
| I'm just telling you this from experience because I learned a lot about nootropics from you. | ||
| I don't really know much about it. | ||
| But Romanoski sent me two of his jugs in the tropics. | ||
| The orange juice flavored stuff. | ||
| Yeah, that's the shit that got me into nootropics. | ||
| When I got off cocaine, that came in the mail and I really drank and I didn't tell nobody my secret. | ||
| Because I knew, especially for a guy like me, you know, John Jones is 26 years old. | ||
| He's a phenomenal fighter. | ||
| I didn't think it really had anything to do with anything. | ||
| I think it Cocaine takes the pleasure patterns out of your mind, out of your brain, out of that side. | ||
| The serotonin, the melatonin, I don't know. | ||
| Don't correct me on this. | ||
| But I feel that it took me a year to 18 months for me to become a human again. | ||
| And I haven't gotten hit in the head. | ||
| Not since I was about 13. I got beat up by the guy. | ||
| I tried the mug and I got hit in the head with a flashlight. | ||
| It really took me 18 months to embrace humanity again. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I want you to remember that. | ||
| I want you to think of that morning, what happened in Santa Fe when he ran the light and he ran away from that. | ||
| Where was he, Jamie? | ||
| Do you think he just woke up and was going to church? | ||
| No, he was out the night before. | ||
| Yeah, he could have very well been out the night before. | ||
| There's no pleasure. | ||
| It takes your mind a long time. | ||
| You know, what's the thing? | ||
| When I get off the juice, I got to do something for my balls to grow again? | ||
| You'd have to take something called clomiphene. | ||
| Okay, and what happens? | ||
| There's a couple different ones, apparently. | ||
| It's an estrogen blocker. | ||
| It blocks your estrogen. | ||
| That's actually one of the things that John tested positive for. | ||
| Okay, so how long would it take for me to get my balls back again? | ||
| It'd take you a little while. | ||
| They think it's about half the amount of time that you were doing it. | ||
| That's why you're only supposed to go on a short cycle, unless you're a crazy bodybuilder guy. | ||
| Those guys just stay on it all the time. | ||
| Same thing with the cocaine, bro. | ||
| I thought about your statement, and I went home and started writing and thinking. | ||
| I got off in November of 2007. It took me a year and a half just to become a human being to realize I was fat. | ||
| I was 400 pounds. | ||
| I needed to go to Weight Watchers. | ||
| It took me 18 months to realize I had to marry my wife. | ||
| It took me a long time for my brain to think normal like anybody else did. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| So I want you to take that into consideration. | ||
| Oh, I definitely do. | ||
| I know what you're saying. | ||
| I agree, too. | ||
| It took me a long time. | ||
| You know, when you do blow and you go on stage, if I do blow three nights in a week and I go on stage, I have no control of Joe Rogan. | ||
| I'm looking at you in the face. | ||
| You see me on stage. | ||
| I have no control. | ||
| I have no connection from my brain to what's coming out of my mouth. | ||
| I can't... | ||
| Now you're going, are you speaking Tourette's? | ||
| No. | ||
| It was empty words. | ||
| There was no passion behind it. | ||
| That's why it wasn't funny. | ||
| You know what you said to me? | ||
| You said it blocks love. | ||
| It blocks the love. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| The love... | ||
| In between the cocaine and my words is gone. | ||
| Well, that's what stimulants do. | ||
| Stimulants ramp up the aggression and the impulsiveness and they ramp up your fearlessness. | ||
| They ramp up your courage. | ||
| You get disproportionate. | ||
| They ramp up your ego. | ||
| Like some stimulants on some people. | ||
| Some people, obviously, look, there's people that can handle booze and there's people that can't handle even a little booze. | ||
| And I think that's the same with stimulants. | ||
| I think that's the same with pretty much everything, almost every life experience, in fact. | ||
| I think there's some people that can handle things and some people that can't and some people that can't at first and they eventually learn to. | ||
| Someone sent me something about Rodney Dangerfield. | ||
| It was fucking great, man. | ||
| Oh, from the New York Times? | ||
| The relentless thing. | ||
| Yeah, it was great. | ||
| John Dudley. | ||
| John Dudley sent it to me. | ||
| Fucking A. It was amazing. | ||
| Yeah, I read that really good. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| Oh, no. | ||
| Tate Fletcher. | ||
| Tate Fletcher sent it to me. | ||
| That was great. | ||
| It was Tate. | ||
| Shout out to Tate Fletcher. | ||
| Where is Tate? | ||
| Oh, damn. | ||
| Letter of Recommendation, Roddy Dangerfield. | ||
| It is an amazing piece. | ||
| Who wrote this? | ||
| What is the name of the gentleman? | ||
| Alex Halbert Stat? | ||
| Alex, you made a masterpiece. | ||
| That's a fucking hell of an article about. | ||
| One of the greatest of all time when it comes to stand-up comedy. | ||
| And he just talks about the evolution of Rodney Dangerfield and how it wasn't until he was in his 50s that he really fucking got it together. | ||
| Like, it became the great stand-up that we know him as and his process for boiling down his material. | ||
| Joey, it's a fucking amazing article. | ||
| Doug, I read it two times. | ||
| Look, I get tears in my eyes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, me too. | |
| So what do you want to do? | ||
| We're going to do the special? | ||
| Yes, we're going to do a special. | ||
| I'm going to direct your comedy special. | ||
| We're just going to figure out when to do it and where to do it. | ||
| June at the Ice House. | ||
| The Ice House is the place. | ||
| I think that's the place. | ||
| Who shows? | ||
| What shows? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let's do six shows. | ||
| Let's do six. | ||
| Let's do six. | ||
| I want to do two Thursday, two Friday, two Saturday. | ||
| Boom! | ||
| I want to get those crazy weeknight savages. | ||
| It's a different kind of animal that goes out on Thursday night. | ||
| One hour. | ||
| They're a little more ramped up. | ||
| We're going for one hour, 15 minutes. | ||
| You're going to go crazy is what we're going to do. | ||
| We're going to capture the real Joey Diaz experience and we're going to put together a special. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| We're done. | ||
| June in Ice House. | ||
| We'll give everybody the details, but this is the first special that I've ever even attempted to do something with other than my own. | ||
| Thank you very much for the opportunity. | ||
| Let's go fucking crazy. | ||
| I think this is the time for you. | ||
| I think the name of it is Immigrant Mentality. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Immigrant Mentality is perfect! | |
| Out of respect for Stipe Maocic. | ||
| Oh, that's perfect. | ||
| That's a perfect name. | ||
| Immigrant Mentality is the perfect fucking name. | ||
| That's the name of the album. | ||
| Okay, beautiful. | ||
| I'm already in process to writing. | ||
| I'm ready to go. | ||
| I think the Ice House is the place. | ||
| We've been there a million times. | ||
| It's home. | ||
| It's family. | ||
| Oh my God, it's home. | ||
| It's home. | ||
| Yeah, it's a great place to film. | ||
| And when that place gets rocking, holy shit. | ||
| It's perfectly designed. | ||
| I'm going to Colorado. | ||
| I'm flying in a day early. | ||
| I'm interviewing Antonio Ledizio. | ||
| I'm going to go show people where I kidnapped Bella. | ||
| I'm going to show people the halfway house. | ||
| I'm going to walk around Boulder. | ||
| I'm going to tape all that. | ||
| I'm going to have that up this fucking spring. | ||
| I got some shit I'm playing. | ||
| I want to do like a little mixtape type of stand-up drop. | ||
| We've got to let these motherfuckers know your ideas. | ||
| I'm ready to shoot the special. | ||
| I had a great time in Charlotte, man. | ||
| I knew you were in Durham. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And you and I were discussing the comedy scene in North Carolina. | ||
| It's amazing. | ||
| I just want to thank you people. | ||
| And the week before that, I was in Austin, and that place is like, this last time I got emotional in Austin. | ||
| Like, I don't know how many times I drove from Houston to Austin to do the open mic on Wednesday, Joe Rogan, in that little stage. | ||
| I could tell you, looking in your face five times, and now I was headlining and selling the place out. | ||
| I just didn't walk in there, dog. | ||
| I did the open mic for Margie, and she would tell me, you're too dirty for me to walk in. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| And now Austin is fucking, it's really weird to see the growth of cities, but not only that, to see the growth of comedy in these cities. | ||
| Portland, Oregon, like that's what happened, that's how Fidel took over Cuba. | ||
| Just little growth in different areas. | ||
| And the internet. | ||
| The internet has made people more aware of comedy. | ||
| Fifteen years ago, we would go to Houston and be excited. | ||
| We would go to New York and maybe like three other places. | ||
| Everything else was just a regular town. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Now, every town is excited about Joe Rogan, Bert Kreischer, fucking... | ||
| Who's the girl? | ||
| The girl. | ||
| What's the Chinese girl? | ||
| Amy Wong. | ||
| Ali Wong? | ||
| Yeah, there's a lot of great comedy. | ||
| Everybody's fucking excited about people coming to town. | ||
| You know, we've seen this growth. | ||
| Like, it's been an amazing... | ||
| Like, see, I got into comedy on the tail end. | ||
| Like, when I got into comedy, people were telling you it's over, kid, because five years before that, MCs were getting $1,500 plus air. | ||
| And features were getting $2,500 plus air. | ||
| And headliners were getting $5,000 plus air. | ||
| And all of a sudden, when I got in it, I still remember the first notes he gave us was, before you guys get into comedy, I want you to tell you what happened to the bubble. | ||
| It busted. | ||
| And he broke down what comics were getting paid. | ||
| I didn't give a fuck. | ||
| He was just trying to discourage us. | ||
| Yeah, he's wrong. | ||
| He's wrong. | ||
| You know what the bubble is? | ||
| Not writing jokes. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That was the bubble. | ||
| That was the bubble. | ||
| That was the bubble in Boston. | ||
| I'm almost positive. | ||
| I don't know what people blame it on the excess of comedy on television at the time. | ||
| I don't believe that because the great ones are still there. | ||
| I think what happened was there was a lot of guys that were really, really, really, really fucking funny because they had taken their act and polished that motherfucker like a diamond and they brought it to you and it was just perfect. | ||
| It was a perfect act but it didn't change. | ||
| It was a perfect piece of work, but they didn't write more. | ||
| Some guys did, but not enough guys did. | ||
| And so people would keep coming back to the shows, they'd be able to say the jokes word for word, year after year. | ||
| Like, they'd go to see some guys, they would do the same act, year after year. | ||
| And they never left Boston. | ||
| And it's a very unfortunate thing, because when it comes to proficiency level, There's guys like Steve Sweeney that used to kill in a way that you're like, oh my god. | ||
| What's the guy that used to drink the white Russians in a container? | ||
| Don motherfucking Gavin. | ||
| Don Gavin's one of the greatest ever. | ||
| There was five or four guys out in Boston when I started that you heard about. | ||
| Your boy, too, at the time. | ||
| Lenny Clark. | ||
| Back in some heat. | ||
| Lenny. | ||
| Lenny was killing it. | ||
| And what's the guy that had the shows? | ||
| He was funny in 91, bro. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Anthony Clark was very funny. | |
| He used to murder. | ||
| He used to fill the Faneuil Hall Club with all screaming chicks. | ||
| I never saw anything like it because he was cute, you know, and he would be silly on stage. | ||
| Girls loved him. | ||
| I mean to the point where that place would be overrun with girls. | ||
| It would be like 80-20 girls in this Faneuil Hall comedy connection. | ||
| We'd be like, what the fuck? | ||
| Like, what other comic brings in girls like this that love him? | ||
| And then here's another one. | ||
| They'd see his same bits over and over and over again. | ||
| They didn't care. | ||
| They would fine with it. | ||
| It's weird. | ||
| It was a weird time. | ||
| What fucked everybody up was people would go to see someone special. | ||
| Like, Kinison did a special, and then he tried to do the material from the special on a show. | ||
| And the people already knew the material. | ||
| And they were, like, yelling out bits and fucking up bits. | ||
| And I think comics then started realizing... | ||
| Once you do like a real special and put it on HBO or something like that and it makes you famous, you gotta throw that shit away and write a completely new set. | ||
| That's why it's so tough now. | ||
| It's hard. | ||
| Because you're trying to develop your hour on the road, then you put your hour on the road and... | ||
| You go out the following week to promote that hour, and you got the same half hour of that hour. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Unless you're fucking Harry Houdini. | ||
| So now I'm preparing for that already. | ||
| What I went through after the last time was a big fucking lesson. | ||
| Everybody has that lesson. | ||
| Tom is going through that right now. | ||
| Tom just put his out. | ||
| That's it, yeah. | ||
| And those weeks when you're putting that out, just stay home. | ||
| Just stay home. | ||
| Don't embarrass you. | ||
| Don't try to do something. | ||
| Stay home and get 15 minute bits of the shot. | ||
| And once you get six of those 15 minute bits, then you go out and put 45 together and you start from scratch. | ||
| And then... | ||
| You still got 30, 35 minutes once you shot to your bed. | ||
| Once you shot that 50 minutes, you still got 35 minutes to work on again. | ||
| There's no shame. | ||
| Fucking your boy is an animal. | ||
| He stays home for a fucking year to work on an hour and then goes out. | ||
| Russell. | ||
| Russell Peters? | ||
| Yeah, he stays home for a long time. | ||
| But Russell does, he still does some gigs on the road being emcees and just talks to the crowd. | ||
| Fucks with him. | ||
| Bro, shout out to our little pet partner Friday night selling out the staples. | ||
| Only the second comic to do it. | ||
| Who sold out the Staples? | ||
| Gabriel. | ||
| Did he really? | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Friday night. | ||
| That's like 20,000 people. | ||
| That's a Laker game. | ||
| That's a Laker game. | ||
| Gabriel Iglesias sold out a Laker game. | ||
| Friday night at the Staples Center. | ||
| Him and Kevin Hart are the only ones to do it. | ||
| Fucking animal. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Jesus. | |
| How the fuck do you sell out? | ||
| Gabriel's murdering it. | ||
| Here's why. | ||
| He's funny. | ||
| Anybody can go see him. | ||
| You can take your kids to see him, your mom to see him. | ||
| He's a nice guy. | ||
| Everybody loves him. | ||
| You're getting what you want to see. | ||
| You're getting a funny comedian having a good time. | ||
| Selling out the fucking Staples Center! | ||
| Selling out the fucking Staples Center! | ||
| How many thousands? | ||
| I want to say that's at least like 18,000 people. | ||
| I think that might be 20. It might be 20,000. | ||
| I think that place is giant. | ||
| Here's the beautiful thing. | ||
| I still remember him paying me 35 hours on a Wednesday night to go to the bicycle club and he would host. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| How many people? | ||
| 21,000! | ||
| Jesus Christ! | ||
| Oh my God, that's so many people. | ||
| My head hurts. | ||
| He's up there telling jokes. | ||
| 21,000 people. | ||
| Powerful Gabriel Iglesias. | ||
| Holy shit. | ||
| That's nuts. | ||
| That is fucking nuts. | ||
| That's the height of comedy. | ||
| Yeah, he's right at the top right now. | ||
| Him and Kevin Hart. | ||
| In terms of being able to do that. | ||
| Especially being able to do that in LA. He's a hero in LA. He's done more shows consecutively at the Ice House and sold out. | ||
| Fucking 10 years ago he was doing that. | ||
| He would do Monday shows, Tuesday shows, two shows Wednesday, two shows Thursday. | ||
| He would just fucking crank them out, man. | ||
| He was taking people out to breakfast. | ||
| After his shows? | ||
| Yeah, on Christmas Eve. | ||
| He still does two shows on Christmas Eve. | ||
| That's amazing. | ||
| He could do shows at 3 in the afternoon. | ||
| He would do shows at the Ice House whenever he wanted and they'd be packed. | ||
| 3 in the afternoon, fuck it, pack, let's go! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Woo! | |
| People wanted to see it. | ||
| Have a couple of drinks. | ||
| Watch some funny comedy. | ||
| Why not? | ||
| Thank God. | ||
| Just the amount of people that are going out to comedy. | ||
| I'm just honored to be a part of this whole thing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Me too. | |
| You know, Joey, you and I have known each other for a long time now. | ||
| And so we've seen like a couple of waves. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| No, no. | ||
| Nothing like this. | ||
| How the fuck were you at the wheelchair and sold out in New Year's? | ||
| And Chappelle and John Mayer at the fucking Forum. | ||
| They were sold out, too. | ||
| He was sold out, but he did a warm-up the night before somewhere else. | ||
| Like, let's just try it out just to see if it works. | ||
| And that sold out, too. | ||
| Like, people are out and about, Jack. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| People are out and about. | ||
| Well, we're very, very lucky to have Dave out there right now. | ||
| Like, doing a lot of comedy. | ||
| Like, he's top of the food chain and he's doing a lot of comedy. | ||
| Did two specials last year and two specials this year. | ||
| And they're fucking good, man. | ||
| They're good. | ||
| No, no, they're very good. | ||
| That one he did from D.C., that is a really good special. | ||
| That's a good special. | ||
| I enjoyed the shit out of that. | ||
| I enjoyed The Belly Room, too. | ||
| Yeah, I love that, too. | ||
| I enjoyed it. | ||
| I haven't seen that one 100% yet, though. | ||
| Every agent told you the belly room wouldn't work. | ||
| It's not going to work. | ||
| You dumb fuck. | ||
| They're silly. | ||
| The belly room, when you get into a groove in the belly room. | ||
| Okay, let me break something down here. | ||
| At the Comedy Store, and again, you're going to go, we heard this. | ||
| Guys, no, you haven't heard this one. | ||
| Because I just found this one out fucking three weeks ago when you got sick that night. | ||
| And I covered for you. | ||
| In the belly room, you had the flu. | ||
| And they called me, and I went to the belly flu. | ||
| The belly flu? | ||
| No, I went to the belly room. | ||
| And I had this certain energy going in the belly room, and it just wasn't doing it. | ||
| The belly room doesn't require the efficiency that the original room requires. | ||
| How so? | ||
| So you want to slow it down a little bit in the belly room, is that what you're saying? | ||
| Okay, so I'm sparring with you, and we're not doing 50%, we're doing 30 now. | ||
| Right. | ||
| In the belly room, if we do 50, it's a little too aggressive. | ||
| The two right there, the energy's right there. | ||
| I learned this after 20 fucking years of doing spots there. | ||
| Remember, the belly room was where I learned to story tell. | ||
| Before that, I was rushing to the punchline and not getting any of the joke out. | ||
| The belly room was where I learned to sit back a little bit and explain what the fuck it is you're trying to tell us. | ||
| Why are you just telling me? | ||
| There's no segue here. | ||
| There's nothing, Joey. | ||
| You're just eating some girl's asshole. | ||
| It's great. | ||
| We don't want to hear that. | ||
| We want to hear how you got there. | ||
| I learned that in 99 in the belly room, fucking around. | ||
| And I went back up there a couple weeks ago. | ||
| For me, the main room, I gotta come out like a fuck. | ||
| In the main room, I gotta come out like Mike Tyson when he beat up, who did he beat up in Atlantic City? | ||
| Knocked him out in the 57 seconds. | ||
| He was part of one of the brothers with the mouthpiece, Leon Spinks. | ||
| Michael Spinks. | ||
| I eat dick in the main room unless I come out jabbing, crossing, one, two. | ||
| It's a different room. | ||
| I gotta come out one, two in the main room. | ||
| Right. | ||
| In the original room, the gauge is who you're following. | ||
| I gotta follow Chris D'Elia. | ||
| Who came out this year? | ||
| Who came out against Travis with a flying sidekick? | ||
| Oh, Fabricio Verdun. | ||
| I gotta come out with a flying sidekick at the original room. | ||
| Okay, this is so people break it down for you. | ||
| In the original room, you gotta follow Joe Rogan, Chris D'Elia, or Bill Burr, like I had a couple weeks ago. | ||
| I gotta come out from the curtain, okay, and throw a flying sidekick upward, which hasn't been done since Bruce Lee and the Chinese Connection. | ||
| Me and you would usually do a flying sidekick from an evil ground. | ||
| Right. | ||
| No, I gotta go upward. | ||
| That's the comedy in the fucking original room. | ||
| That's where you see me go bananas, where you see me at my best, like crazy, red in the face, about to have a heart attack, pitching your heart out on stage. | ||
| You have to come out with a flying psychic. | ||
| That's a crazy move. | ||
| But you go on a vertical or a tremendous up, you're on your back kick, and I gotta get on my shoulders and kick up and try to get you in the jaw. | ||
| That's the original room. | ||
| The belly room. | ||
| I could rest on my right hook. | ||
| I could rest on my one-two. | ||
| The belly room you can. | ||
| I could breathe and just throw one-twos and keep you off me. | ||
| Deep, breathe deep. | ||
| Get my composure. | ||
| And even though you hit me with some of those Ungayo slugs, Ungano, if I keep my hands up and stay away from your right, I'll be okay. | ||
| That's the belly room. | ||
| That's why the Belly Room I always thought would be a great place to shoot a special. | ||
| You know what's great about the Belly Room is the same thing that's great about the Ice House Annex, the second room? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| There's no room for an act. | ||
| There's no room for an act. | ||
| It's too intimate. | ||
| You have to figure out where's the no-fat aspect of the bit, and you have to be tuned into the bit. | ||
| They feel you. | ||
| I'm doing my 55th birthday up there, up at the Ice House. | ||
| What day is that? | ||
| It's a Saturday, the 19th. | ||
| It's the 19th. | ||
| I can't get the Comedy Store. | ||
| So I got the original room. | ||
| I got the small room at the Ice House on the 17th. | ||
| The 19th. | ||
| And then the 18th, I got the original room. | ||
| I got the belly room at the Comedy Store. | ||
| And it's the night before George Washington's birthday. | ||
| So I got people doing that one, too. | ||
| So I turned 55 that weekend. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| And working out with Uncle Joey, I only charge 10 or 15 bucks. | ||
| I do that once a month, and I go on stage two. | ||
| And you just fuck around. | ||
| Everything I write down in a notebook that I don't really know about. | ||
| And we develop it together up there and sometimes it's phenomenal. | ||
| Nine out of ten it really is phenomenal. | ||
| It's a good idea. | ||
| You want me to tell you why? | ||
| Because I'm at 30%. | ||
| I purposely eat an edible. | ||
| Purposely. | ||
| I wouldn't do that at the Comedy Store on a Saturday night. | ||
| No? | ||
| No. | ||
| I purposely eat an edible to take the edge off. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| I might even have a shot of alcohol. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa. | |
| Whoa. | ||
| Just one. | ||
| It's three points. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because I don't need much alcohol. | ||
| So I'll do an edible and have a little shot of alcohol at the Ice House and tape it. | ||
| And always get one or two great things, Joe Rogan. | ||
| I'm not going to tell you I get an hour of greatness, but because you're so relaxed and they know what they're getting, it's a big difference, Joe. | ||
| The Comedy Store, listen, how do you sharpen metal? | ||
| With metal. | ||
| Comedy store. | ||
| Stones. | ||
| We do a special in June. | ||
| May, I gotta go to the comedy store three nights, four nights a week. | ||
| That's sparring. | ||
| That's a gem. | ||
| Who's next? | ||
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| Delia, get up there. | ||
| And do takedowns for an hour. | ||
| Take them down. | ||
| I don't care how... | ||
| That's what you do before you shoot a special. | ||
| Don't you think you need all of it, right? | ||
| You need the sets. | ||
| You need the writing. | ||
| You need the sets. | ||
| You need the writing. | ||
| You need the working out. | ||
| Your head's got to be at the right place. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| You know what else I think you need? | ||
| You need friendship. | ||
| I think that helps. | ||
| I think that when you said that to me on the phone the other day... | ||
| And you also know that you gotta, when I get there, you gotta leave some stuff to aggravate me. | ||
| But I've thought about this many times, like, who would I be without you guys? | ||
| Like, who would I be without you? | ||
| Who would I be without Eddie? | ||
| Who would I be without Red Band? | ||
| Who would I be without Ari? | ||
| Who would I be without Duncan? | ||
| I think about the same thing. | ||
| Tom Segura. | ||
| I think about the same thing. | ||
| Who would I be? | ||
| These people like Bert, they mean a lot to me. | ||
| They're very important people. | ||
| And then there's your family, which is through the moon. | ||
| That kind of love is very weird. | ||
| That kind of love is overwhelming how much it changes who you are. | ||
| The other day you were talking about Tao and Jeet Kune Do. | ||
| The Bruce Lee book. | ||
| And you were saying that a lot of excerpts were stolen. | ||
| I don't even know if that's true. | ||
| And that's not the proper word that I used. | ||
| Plagiarized. | ||
| I have a tile with Joey Diaz. | ||
| And half of that tile is what I learned from Joe Rogan. | ||
| The other half of that tile is what I learned from Ari and working with Duncan. | ||
| None of us are very original. | ||
| I just kick it up a bit. | ||
| One thing I love about you is you didn't sell t-shirts after the show. | ||
| You don't need to do nothing. | ||
| When I go into a town, I focus on five shows. | ||
| I don't want to do your podcast. | ||
| I don't want to go see the Statue of Liberty. | ||
| I really don't. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You're right. | |
| You're there to kick ass. | ||
| I'm there to go to get a good meal. | ||
| After the first show, it's a small club. | ||
| It's sold out. | ||
| Let me not go out there and take pictures. | ||
| Let me focus on the important thing. | ||
| I'm 55. I gotta give you 150 fucking percent. | ||
| And those are the towel. | ||
| I'm up early. | ||
| I do my radio. | ||
| I'm up early to get out of there. | ||
| Every once in a while on Saturday, you gotta have a drink with the audience. | ||
| A little shot on stage or whatever. | ||
| I've come to think of myself as... | ||
| I'm a piece of three or four of you guys, if you want the truth. | ||
| Ari, I like Ari's relaxation on stage. | ||
| Ari takes chances, like all three of us love to take chances. | ||
| That's why we do what we do. | ||
| You're not gonna get the same hour, year after fucking year, not even close. | ||
| We also have a similar style of mixing everything all up together. | ||
| Of mixing everything up, yeah. | ||
| Like Ari does that. | ||
| Everybody has their own talent, man. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, Bruce Lee, he just wanted to teach you how to combine it. | ||
| And that's what we're doing right now. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| You think I'm Johnny Original? | ||
| I take a little bit of you. | ||
| Doesn't mean anything. | ||
| I learned from Bert. | ||
| I learned from Tom. | ||
| I learned from Bill Burr. | ||
| I learned from Dave Chappelle. | ||
| And now this is your art. | ||
| Again, The arm bar is the same. | ||
| Whether I go to you or John Junkie and show me the same arm bar, it's how I do it. | ||
| It's the same point. | ||
| It's a really good point. | ||
| I think there's no way you could ever say any one person is not influenced because every single style of stand-up comedy is in some way or another originated with the Lenny Bruce's and the Dick Gregory's and the guys who were doing it way back in the day. | ||
| Even Bob Hope. | ||
| All those guys, they started this thing. | ||
| You gotta think, the world has had no stand-up comedy. | ||
| Up until, like, what? | ||
| 150 years ago or something? | ||
| That's nothing. | ||
| This shit just started. | ||
| And you know who was one of the first guys to do it? | ||
| Mark motherfucking Twain. | ||
| Mark motherfucking Twain would do readings of his book, and it was funny, and people would laugh. | ||
| He was in front of people, rocking. | ||
| He was killing. | ||
| He was telling stories and reading, and people thought he was hilarious. | ||
| And he would give speeches, and people thought he was hilarious. | ||
| They found somebody before Mark Twain. | ||
| Oh, I'm sure. | ||
| But he was a really popular writer. | ||
| Three years ago, yeah. | ||
| There's living proof that this art form, a form of this art form existed before. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| In some civilization. | ||
| I did read that a couple years ago. | ||
| I'm sure. | ||
| Storytelling. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| There was some story. | ||
| And because, and now I see myself on stage, like when I tape my sets now, Bro, I hear a little Joe Rogan. | ||
| I hear a little Rodney. | ||
| I hear a little Lenny Bruce. | ||
| I love Lenny Bruce's... | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| Dig. | ||
| Dig. | ||
| I love that Lenny Bruce said shit that you didn't know what the fuck. | ||
| And it wasn't dirty. | ||
| Just a certain word. | ||
| Like when I go on stage that, you know... | ||
| You don't want to know Malukia in the place. | ||
| Malukia is one of those mergers. | ||
| What's he saying? | ||
| Malukia is just bad luck. | ||
| But that's something Lenny Clark would say to fuck with you. | ||
| He put the Maluk on me. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| We're not plagiarizing or doing anything like that. | ||
| No, we're influenced. | ||
| We're influenced, and nothing's wrong with that. | ||
| Also, one thing that's important is we're all real fans of comedy. | ||
| I know you're still a fan. | ||
| You still enjoy watching comedy. | ||
| Still love it. | ||
| You know, I go to the fourth wall a lot, Chair Rogan. | ||
| The fourth wall was what Mickey told Rocky to do. | ||
| You know me. | ||
| I gotta take it back to the Rocky movie. | ||
| Mickey told Rocky to do what? | ||
| Win, Rocky! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Win! | |
| Because he wanted... | ||
| Somebody took... | ||
| Oh, no! | ||
| I'm sorry. | ||
| Apollo took Rocky to the dirty gym and said, look at these motherfuckers. | ||
| Take it back. | ||
| No, no, no, no, no. | ||
| He took them to his own black gym, and he goes, I wanted you to look at these guys so you could look at their eyes. | ||
| And he goes, remember when your eyes used to be like that rock? | ||
| Oh, that's right. | ||
| He goes, remember when your eyes used to be like that rock? | ||
| So lately, I've been going, before I go out in there, I go to the fourth wall in North Hollywood. | ||
| And I pay $5 to do five minutes. | ||
| And the rule is, you have to sit there. | ||
| You know most open mics, you do your stage time and you leave? | ||
| Right. | ||
| You have to sit there and watch others. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| And I'll tell you something. | ||
| The last six weeks, I've learned more from watching these open micers than anything. | ||
| Because I also realized that where I was when I was one of these guys, I wanted what I had right now. | ||
| I wanted to be a headliner. | ||
| I wanted to not be a rich guy, but I wanted to just be funny. | ||
| I wanted to be accepted as a comedian. | ||
| And ever since, I've been going to the fourth wall. | ||
| I go there three or four nights a week, Joe Rogan. | ||
| I pay $5 to do five minutes. | ||
| I'm no better than anybody else. | ||
| But the main thing is he asks me when I want to go up. | ||
| And I always tell him towards the end. | ||
| Because I want to watch these kids. | ||
| And Joe, every time I leave there, bro, I leave laughing. | ||
| And I fucking learn something. | ||
| Really? | ||
| And I'm back. | ||
| No alcohol in there, Joe Rogan. | ||
| Just fucking eight people watching you do five minutes. | ||
| I want you to think about when you were doing five minutes... | ||
| And what was going through your heart? | ||
| I'm just telling you, my heart's beating. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| Because I still remember bombing and leaving there thinking, now I'm going to have to get a waiter job, or now you're going to have to get a cook job. | ||
| These guys all have day jobs. | ||
| They all talk about their shitty jobs. | ||
| But every time I go to the fourth wall, bro, I fucking learn something. | ||
| I go there some nights, I go to flappers. | ||
| I go there some nights, I go to the store. | ||
| I go there some nights, I go to... | ||
| The ha-ha. | ||
| I do it that way. | ||
| But I always go there. | ||
| And every time I go there, I always go there with like five minutes planned. | ||
| Bro, it doesn't even hit the stage. | ||
| Because from watching those guys, I learn something. | ||
| I remember something. | ||
| And I just come up with this crazy story. | ||
| So I look at it as like doing kettlebells. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's a good way to look at it. | ||
| I really do. | ||
| I look at these young guys and I remember that pain and that confusion that I had. | ||
| That fucking feeling you had when you were in open mic or when your friends were telling you you were funny, but you still had to drive the limo or keep the paper job route or still drop off papers or whatever the fuck job you said you had. | ||
| You told me the story about meeting at Atlantic and all that. | ||
| You're still in that crossroads of comedy where you don't know what to do, but you know in your fucking heart that you just can't wait to be a headliner. | ||
| Somebody would just give you a chance. | ||
| Back then, I wasn't even thinking I could ever be a headliner. | ||
| I was just hoping I could make a living. | ||
| I never thought I'd wind up being successful. | ||
| And when you mean living, you mean... | ||
| Food. | ||
|
unidentified
|
One bedroom, cable TV. Oh, there was a guy that had a fucking loft. | |
| He was the king. | ||
| The guy had a loft. | ||
| They had taken a schoolhouse and turned it into condominiums. | ||
| This guy, I'll never forget. | ||
| I looked up to him. | ||
| I couldn't believe where he was living. | ||
| DJ Hazard, that's his name. | ||
| Hilarious comedian. | ||
| Oh my god! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, sure! | |
| Well, DJ has always been a real nice guy. | ||
| Excellent guy. | ||
| Very funny guy. | ||
| Always has been. | ||
| But I remember he had like a loft apartment. | ||
| I remember everybody talked about it. | ||
| It's like, what? | ||
| It's got brick walls inside. | ||
| It's like, he was the king. | ||
| He was living like an adult, but he was a stand-up comedian. | ||
| Like everybody else, we had thought about like, you know, you're living like you're barely getting by. | ||
| Stuffing a bunch of guys into a house, you know. | ||
| There was a lot of like comedy flop houses where comedians would wind up moving in together or you're Living in some shitty apartment that you could barely afford or you're living with your girlfriend or something. | ||
| It's weird when you go back and think about it, you know? | ||
| Like you could have quit at any time. | ||
| Think about it. | ||
| Think about your early days when it's terrible and just bombed all the time. | ||
| If it wasn't for John Leguizamo. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, I watched him do a set one night at the old Triple N in front of eight or nine people. | ||
| And in his mind, he was at the garden, dog. | ||
| And I was like, I get it now. | ||
| Bro, where's your Me Too pin? | ||
| I left it home. | ||
| You know who one of the most proud moments as a young comedian? | ||
| When I was at the Comedy Store and I did a set in front of, you know, like literally like maybe five or six people. | ||
| But I did it as hard as I would do it in a regular room. | ||
| And I heard in the back Paul Mooney going, Ah! | ||
| Ah! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Ah! | |
| Stop laughing in support. | ||
| You know how Paul Mooney would laugh in support? | ||
| And you would go, oh shit, I just got the green light from Paul fucking Mooney. | ||
| Like Paul Mooney was laughing at my shit. | ||
| Then he came up to me after the show and he goes, you're a real comic. | ||
| He's like, you did that show in front of all those people. | ||
| And he goes, you knew that there was five fucking people in that room. | ||
| You did that show like it was packed. | ||
| He goes, that's a real comic. | ||
| He goes, you made me laugh, motherfucker. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| That's what you learned at the comedy show. | ||
| But when a guy like Paul Mooney says that to you when you're just coming up, you're like, holy shit. | ||
| Like, I might be able to figure this out. | ||
| I might be able to do this. | ||
| It's big, right? | ||
| Someone coming up to you? | ||
| You know, it's crazy. | ||
| When you do a spot at the store, you know you're in the big leagues, bro. | ||
| Like, no matter where I do a spot, when I travel, that's one thing. | ||
| When I'm at the store on a Thursday night, Tuesday night, you know you're in some fucking good company. | ||
| You're doing something right. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Or you did something right. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I love when comics are in the room. | ||
| I love laughing at comics. | ||
| I love going to the store a little early and catching two or three great comics and laughing, man. | ||
| That makes my fucking night. | ||
| Whether it's you or even Bobby Lee is so fucking out of his mind on stage. | ||
| You know, lately we've been getting the Ron Whites and the fucking Bill... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Bill Burr? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, like that. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, Ron White, Bill Burr, Ali Wong. | ||
| There was a lineup last week. | ||
| Chappelle's there all the time. | ||
| There was a lineup last week that was just ridiculous. | ||
| It's insane. | ||
| Two weeks ago. | ||
| The night I saw you down there, that was just ridiculous. | ||
| Place is on fire. | ||
| On the way down, I had anxiety. | ||
| You know, I puked on the car one time on the way down there from the anxiety of going down there and following. | ||
| Well, I'm having the surgery on March 5th. | ||
| For your ear? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And what do they have to do exactly? | ||
| Put a tube in there to drain the fluid. | ||
| What fluids in your ear? | ||
| It's getting to the point where, listen bro, for the last six months I've been living with plugs when I go to the shower. | ||
| Now I gotta wear earplugs when I go to jiu-jitsu. | ||
| Why? | ||
| What's going on with your ears? | ||
| Because the fluid goes in... | ||
| I don't know, dog. | ||
| I stuck a bean in my ear when I was six. | ||
| I was playing that game. | ||
| Please don't spill the beans. | ||
| And then you stuck one in your ear and fucked it up. | ||
| And I couldn't get it out. | ||
| I just left it there. | ||
| Oh, I probably rotted over. | ||
| It went in there and fucked it up. | ||
| My mother put hot oil in there. | ||
| They took it out with a fucking... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh no! | |
| They wrecked your ear. | ||
| So they wrecked my ear. | ||
| So today, I get car sick. | ||
| A doctor didn't take it out? | ||
| Yeah, I went up to London, the Jewish hospital, 160th and Broadway up there. | ||
| That's hurting my ear just thinking about it. | ||
| So now, 50 years later, Because of my driving, or whatever, now I get car sick. | ||
| Oh, like equilibrium. | ||
| So I have to even wear earplugs when I go on walks and it's hot. | ||
| I gotta wear earplugs because if not, the sweat goes in my ear. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what? | |
| I used to get terrible fucking car sickness from trying to read a book in a car. | ||
| Oh yeah, you cannot do anything like that in a car. | ||
| After a while, you're just like... | ||
| Oh, especially with reading glasses at this age. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, really? | |
| Put reading glasses on and try to read your Twitter, Jack. | ||
| And come around that turn where the 405 hits the 101 and see what happens to your fucking stomach. | ||
| It's a weird thing, huh? | ||
| Motion sickness? | ||
| Some people get it all the time. | ||
| I get it all the time. | ||
| Not on planes. | ||
| I get it if I get high and get on a boat. | ||
| Go down to Jersey Shore, get on a boat, I'm done. | ||
| I gotta take the pills. | ||
| Oh, those pills, Dramamine? | ||
| That stuff is brutal. | ||
| That stuff is brutal. | ||
| I would rather be seasick than be that tired. | ||
| I'd rather be sick. | ||
| I'll throw up. | ||
| I don't give a fuck. | ||
| It sucks, but at least I don't feel like I'm drugged out. | ||
| Like, I fell asleep in a diner. | ||
| Me and my friend Jimmy Dutillio, we went bluefish fishing on one of those party boats. | ||
| On the way home, we stopped at a diner to get something to eat. | ||
| I literally fell asleep, head down, on the table. | ||
| I literally was, like, drugged out. | ||
| Were you on the Dramamine? | ||
| Yeah, I was on Dramamine. | ||
| And I was only, like... | ||
| 150 pounds back then. | ||
| 154 pounds. | ||
| That was like what I was weighing when I was competing. | ||
| And I never did anything. | ||
| I didn't do anything. | ||
| I didn't drink. | ||
| I didn't smoke pot. | ||
| I didn't do shit. | ||
| So when that drama beat hit my system, my system was like, check please. | ||
| It just shut down. | ||
| I couldn't. | ||
| I had no tolerance at all. | ||
| I fell completely asleep at a diner. | ||
| But I tried to take what my friend Jimmy took. | ||
| He's way bigger than me. | ||
| I think I just overdosed. | ||
| Let me ask you something. | ||
| When Harvey Weinstein gets out of rehab and he wants to come on the podcast, would you let him on? | ||
| I'd let him on if you're coming on, too. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Because we're going to have some fun with him. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Let's hotbox him. | ||
| We want the fucking real footage. | ||
| He's got some crazy footage. | ||
| You can't have him anywhere. | ||
| You know, that guy, especially in the middle, we're joking around folks, especially in the middle of a trial, because he's in the middle of like a ton of trials. | ||
| Oh, when he comes back, he's going to get charged? | ||
| Oh, for sure. | ||
| Something's going to happen. | ||
| There's so many different trials in terms of like civil lawsuits and stuff. | ||
| It's a lot of women saying he did horrible things. | ||
| It's, uh, undoubtedly, there's no way he's going to skate. | ||
| Something's going to happen. | ||
| Something. | ||
| Civic trial, criminal trial, some kind of trial. | ||
| Yeah, he's going to have civil trials. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| We're changing as a species. | ||
| That's what's happening. | ||
| And in the way, it's like we're making it up as we go along. | ||
| There's a lot of rocky things that are happening, a lot of chaos. | ||
| But there's an awareness of what you should and shouldn't do to human beings in terms of forcing yourself on people. | ||
| You know, fucking them when they say no. | ||
| It's like rape. | ||
| And the idea that we're still doing that in 2018 and people are doing that at a really high level. | ||
| It's like, boy. | ||
| But I had creepy things when I moved to this fucking town. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Of course. | |
| Right off the bat. | ||
| As soon as I got here, I heard the creepiest fucking things. | ||
| And the more you got into the movies, I heard even creepier things, and I saw creepy behavior. | ||
| And listen, man, you never want to call a fucking spade a spade because you get in trouble. | ||
| But you look at Kevin, what's his name? | ||
| Spark, what's his name? | ||
| Which guy? | ||
| Kevin Spacey. | ||
| Kevin Spacey, yeah. | ||
| You can't tell, he sucks dick part time. | ||
| You never knew he would suck a dick part time if you looked at Kevin Spacey. | ||
| If you look at that fucking dude, Lee Harvey Weinstein, you can't tell that that dude would make you suck his dick before... | ||
| Think about that. | ||
| And all these people took pictures with him. | ||
| What happened to the fucking agents that actually sent you on that mission to Lee Harvey's fucking hotel room? | ||
| I want to know where the fuck they are. | ||
| They didn't know that Lee Harvey was going to come out with a massage. | ||
| And ask you to suck his fucking dick or watch him naked? | ||
| Bro, we knew for a long fucking time. | ||
| Everybody knew. | ||
| When there's a fucking gap, when you have a dream and you have power, a lot of things can happen. | ||
| I mean, I'm no fucking Liberace, but I got my dick sucked at the Comedy Store just because of being a comedian and somebody thought that you, like, had supernatural powers. | ||
| It's fucking crazy. | ||
| And if you don't know about fucking Hollywood, listen man, they've been fucking people till they're dead for years. | ||
| Look at this fucking Marilyn Monroe. | ||
| They killed that bitch. | ||
| And you know who else was a dirty motherfucker? | ||
| That fucking Liberace. | ||
| That guy was making you sign contracts, making you fucking have plastic surgery. | ||
| Are you fucking kidding me? | ||
| There's been some creepy fucking shit in this town that people got away with for fucking zillions of years. | ||
| And now, and I tell you what, man, I'm all for the movement. | ||
| I'm all for it. | ||
| I have a daughter. | ||
| You have daughters. | ||
| I have sisters. | ||
| I got friends. | ||
| I'll tell you what fucking bothers me the most. | ||
| I'll tell you the only thing that bothers me out of this. | ||
| You know what, bro? | ||
| Who was in Papillon with Steve McQueen? | ||
| I don't remember. | ||
| Dustin Hoffman. | ||
| Was he? | ||
| If he finger-banged you in 73, shut the fuck up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All right? | |
| Shut the fuck up. | ||
| People changed. | ||
| I'm not the same guy who kidnapped Kent Bell in 1987. I'm not. | ||
| Sorry, Joe. | ||
| I'm not. | ||
| So how are you going to come back at me about something I did in 1987? | ||
| I was a different guy. | ||
| I was doing blow. | ||
| I had to ask you to finger-bang you. | ||
| You can't do that. | ||
| That I don't want to do. | ||
| Don't end somebody's fucking career because he stuck a finger in your ass in 92 and now it came back to you through the scale of amnesia. | ||
| You can't do that to me. | ||
| You want to call me out personally? | ||
| Call me the fuck out. | ||
| Call me at home and go, hey man, in 94 one night you asked me if you could eat my asshole. | ||
| You were wrong. | ||
| Listen, I was doing an eight ball a day. | ||
| What do you want from me, all right? | ||
| I resolved that issue. | ||
| That I understand. | ||
| But don't call me out on something I did in 1972. People fucking change, bro. | ||
| That's what pissed me off. | ||
| There's some giant gaps we're talking about. | ||
|
unidentified
|
For Jeremy Piven, it was 1985. And don't fucking call me out. | |
| Before you call me out, call me out with a friend. | ||
| But you're talking about at what level, though? | ||
| If it gets to rape... | ||
| And you've been holding it in this whole time. | ||
| Listen, the where I come from, that's not even allowed. | ||
| That word never entered my mind, ever. | ||
| I'm talking about if I was coked out of the bar one night and I went up to you and I told you your titties were banging and I want to put a coke rock in your asshole. | ||
| You can't come at me for something in 1988 because I used to do it every other night. | ||
| That was my opening line. | ||
| Listen, you asshole's on fire. | ||
| What's it going to take for me to stick my tongue in that fucking thing and make that thing jiggle? | ||
| You know, you're not gonna, listen, you're not gonna get a piece of ass by selling somebody real estate. | ||
| You gotta sell them dick. | ||
| Well, the ones that it works on, that's the ones you want. | ||
| Like, if you can go up to a gal and say that to her... | ||
| Yeah, when I was doing coke, you gotta write me off. | ||
| If I knew you were a girl, and I knew you did coke, and you had that certain look in your eyes... | ||
| What's the coke look? | ||
| The coke look that is... | ||
| When you do cocaine, you do dirty fucking things. | ||
| So when you look at a girl that's doing cocaine and she's like, if she suggests to you that she's going back to your hotel with you, it's on. | ||
| Nobody goes back to their hotel with you when they have a boyfriend if you're doing coke. | ||
| It's on. | ||
| The percentages keep getting go higher and higher. | ||
| Well, coke apparently makes people promiscuous, right? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Makes people go fucking bananas. | ||
| They're going to suck your dick. | ||
| So you take somebody's wife up to your hotel room and it's 6 a.m. | ||
| and she's doing coke with you, you'll notice that one of the times she comes out of the bathroom, the button will be opened. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| Then the next time she comes out, she'll come out to tell you a story and her pants will come out and she'll butt them in front of you. | ||
| Little things start to happen to give you signs. | ||
| And pretty soon you're like, listen, not for nothing. | ||
| Take off your pants. | ||
| Let me see you play with your pussy a little bit. | ||
| That's what gets me right now is the 20-year call-out, the 30-year call-out. | ||
| Now you're going to ruin Dustin Hoffman's career. | ||
| He was giving out foot rubs. | ||
| He was acting creepy. | ||
| But you know what, bro? | ||
| Part of that shit, we allow that creepiness in society. | ||
| We turn our fucking heads. | ||
| You follow what I'm saying to you? | ||
| I'm sure you're not the type to ever turn your head, and I'm not the type to turn my head, but I notice it. | ||
| I notice it. | ||
| The cocaine thing is a real interesting one because you see people making crazy decisions. | ||
| Just real nutty fucking decisions. | ||
| No, you're selatonin, menatonin, you're messing with your whole system. | ||
| Your whole system. | ||
| So your whole system's delusional. | ||
| I remember going out like after a long night and not sleeping. | ||
| Okay, now, there comes to a point where you have this paranoia where you don't leave the house. | ||
| But now that comes to a paranoia that you're going to leave the house and bump into somebody. | ||
| And guess what? | ||
| Sometimes you actually do. | ||
| You go to a 7-Eleven to get a soda and you bump into somebody who's in the same predicament as you. | ||
| That happened to me once. | ||
| I went by Gavin's. | ||
| I think I was staying with Ralphie, and I went by Gavin's, and on the first floor there was this chick that used to be a stripper, and she had a daughter that was about 13, kind of ugly. | ||
| She looked like Pavarotti. | ||
| We used to call her Pavarotti because she had thick fucking eyebrows and shit. | ||
| But her mother was kind of a freak. | ||
| And I got up, like, I was up all night. | ||
| It was like 9 in the morning, and I was about to call my drug dealer to get a package at 11 to keep the party alive. | ||
| And I bumped into that animal in the stairway. | ||
| And she asked me, like, you know, I get some coke right now. | ||
| I was on my way. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And that chick was engaged. | |
| I'll never forget this. | ||
| She was engaged. | ||
| And I go, I'm on my way right now. | ||
| And she goes, do you want to split a gram? | ||
| I go, yeah, yeah, let's split a gram. | ||
| It was like 30 bucks. | ||
| We went over there. | ||
| We split the fucking gram. | ||
| We went back. | ||
| Her daughter was sleeping. | ||
| So we had to do the coke in the hallway on the first floor. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Psst! | |
| All right, under the stairway. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| And after we did two blanks, we were just thinking there, looking at each other. | ||
| And she's like, don't even ask. | ||
| I just told a guy that was bothering me all night that I wouldn't give him sex. | ||
| I go, listen, it's 10 in the morning. | ||
| You got to do something here. | ||
| We got to do something. | ||
| And I started swapping spit. | ||
| Well, the next thing you know, she's sucking the helmet. | ||
| And when I went to come, she goes, don't do that. | ||
| And I came on her jeans. | ||
| Like, it was all over her jeans. | ||
| It's 11.30 in the morning. | ||
| You come on some of these jeans, you're coked up. | ||
| I felt like a piece of shit. | ||
| That's not the worst of it. | ||
| I see her three nights later at El Compadre. | ||
| And she's with her boyfriend. | ||
| I'm like, oh, no. | ||
| And her boyfriend comes over to me. | ||
| He goes, hey, man, we might have a problem here. | ||
| And I'm like, what? | ||
| What's going on? | ||
| He goes... | ||
| My girl was a little bit angry at you. | ||
| I don't know what happened, but I think you should apologize. | ||
| I felt like going, I came on the pants after she sucked my dick. | ||
| That's what happened. | ||
| Did you tell you that? | ||
| Like, that's how crazy the coke world is. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| Like, she told her boyfriend she was angry at me. | ||
| It's none of your business. | ||
| Why? | ||
| So he came over to me. | ||
| He goes, I don't know what's going on. | ||
| You're a nice guy. | ||
| I don't know what's going on. | ||
| I feel like going, you know why? | ||
| She blew me 11 in the morning. | ||
| Then I came on her jeans. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Pfft. | |
| I shot a load on the jeans. | ||
| She couldn't fucking... | ||
| You know what? | ||
| What do you spray on your jeans to get shit off? | ||
| I'm gonna shot it out. | ||
| She couldn't shot out that sperm if she fucking wanted to. | ||
| That old coke sperm. | ||
| No vitamins in my system. | ||
| I weighed 380 pounds. | ||
| Those jeans were stained for life Did the dumbest shit on all those drugs oh The dumbest shit. | ||
| And especially the year it took me to get off it. | ||
| What's going on? | ||
| Someone at our door. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Who the fuck is this? | ||
| Paging me at 546 in the morning. | ||
| Cracker dawning. | ||
| What's going on? | ||
| Is it FedEx? | ||
| Probably. | ||
| Someone dropping something off. | ||
| Um, anyway. | ||
| What's up, my brother? | ||
| Nothing. | ||
| We gotta get out of here. | ||
| Eventually. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Alright. | |
| I'm gonna leave eventually. | ||
| I'm good. | ||
| I'm having a good time. | ||
| It was good to see you. | ||
| It was good to see you too, man. | ||
| Jamie, my man, I thought about you when I saw fucking the Crimson Tide come back against them. | ||
| I thought about you. | ||
| Who'd you bet? | ||
| That one, yeah. | ||
| I lost on that one. | ||
| Tell me the truth. | ||
| I tried parlaying some stuff on it. | ||
| Oh, you fuck. | ||
| I'll go straight up. | ||
| You love those sucker bets. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| You gotta go straight up. | ||
| It's winning the lottery. | ||
| Why win $20 when you can win $200? | ||
| No, because I'd rather raise my percentage and bet one and double up on it and just worry about one. | ||
| Why am I sweating two moves? | ||
| Who the fuck am I to sweat two moves? | ||
| I don't want to get in that long game. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| Fall too deep like you were talking about the whole show. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Who the fuck is this? | |
| What's the next fight on the card? | ||
| It's too exciting. | ||
| We got some great cards to go over. | ||
| The Rockhold Romero fight. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's a great one. | |
| Rockhold Romero. | ||
| And then you got March 7th, Khabib against Tony Ferguson. | ||
| Holy shit, in Brooklyn. | ||
| Coming at you from all directions. | ||
| That's going to be insane. | ||
| In Brooklyn, New York. | ||
| Are you doing a show that weekend in Brooklyn? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Isn't it April? | ||
| It's April, right? | ||
| April. | ||
| What's the exact date? | ||
| April 7th, I believe. | ||
| Yeah, I think it's April. | ||
| Fuck. | ||
| Yeah, that's a crazy fight. | ||
| That is a horrible time I'm having surgery. | ||
| That's a rock'em sock'em robots fight. | ||
| Yeah, 223. That's a who-the-fuck-knows fight. | ||
| You know? | ||
| That's one of those fights where you're like, ooh, that's gonna be a crazy one. | ||
| Tony Ferguson's a bad motherfucker, and Khabib Nurmagomedov is already one of the scariest guys I've ever seen compete. | ||
| Ever. | ||
| Maul's people. | ||
| Already. | ||
| This is his first shot at the title. | ||
| Just stop and think of what happens if that fucking savage gets the title. | ||
| That guy smashes people. | ||
| What he did to Edson Barbosa was supernatural. | ||
| It's like he's not even the same thing. | ||
| You said something during that fight that said it all. | ||
| There was one point in the fight that you said, look at the look. | ||
| In Edson's face. | ||
| Edson's face. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I've had that look, and that's when you're getting chased by 18 people. | ||
| He had a look that he didn't know what to do. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He had no hope. | |
| He had no hope. | ||
| He went into a survival situation, like when you see a deer that's getting attacked by a crocodile or something. | ||
| They have this survival thing. | ||
| Thing where you're just trying to survive. | ||
| Obviously a deer is not the same. | ||
| That's a terrible analogy. | ||
| Let me correct this. | ||
| What I think is that Barboza had realized that there's no way he's going to beat this guy on the ground. | ||
| It's not even close. | ||
| I think if he went into that fight, he probably thought he'd be able to stuff more takedowns and probably be able to get back off his feet because he was doing that with a lot of guys in camp. | ||
| But once that guy gets a hold of you, there's an acceptance that certain fighters go through where they're locked down like, holy shit, like they're just drained from this animal mauling them, trying to retain their energy, trying to recharge their battery, trying to get back in it. | ||
| And you've got to realize, that guy, Edson Barbosa, is one of the best fucking kickers ever. | ||
| Ever. | ||
| He's one of the best kickers ever. | ||
| That fucking guy is the fastest switch kick I've ever seen in my life. | ||
| Outside of, like, professional Muay Thai, like Sanchai or Bukau or something like that, he's got a world-class left leg kick. | ||
| I mean, woo! | ||
| He's fast as fuck. | ||
| He couldn't keep that guy off him. | ||
| That's how scary that guy is. | ||
| There was a look on his face to me where... | ||
| He drilled for hours. | ||
| He drilled take down the fence. | ||
| He drilled everything there was. | ||
| But he never drilled this. | ||
| Couldn't do it. | ||
| Like there was one point where he looked and he was like, wait a second. | ||
| I've done everything I can. | ||
| I even trained with the Giants taking me down for a week. | ||
| Different animal. | ||
| I never felt this. | ||
| I don't know how he keeps you down either. | ||
| His control on that side is fucking something that is... | ||
| There's certain guys that have a grappling skill that's very hard to see when you're looking at it. | ||
| Even if you're a skillful grappler yourself, you're looking at someone, you're like, why is he able to do that to everybody? | ||
| What is he doing differently? | ||
| Why is this one guy being able to do certain things that other people can't do? | ||
| And there's a few of those guys out there where you watch them and you just go, Jesus. | ||
| Like, what the fuck? | ||
| But Khabib's the number one guy in that category because he's never been defeated. | ||
| He's had one moment of adversity in the octagon. | ||
| He got clipped by a punch from Michael Johnson. | ||
| I can't think of a single round he's lost. | ||
| Not off the top of my head, at least. | ||
| I mean, he may have lost rounds on some judges' scorecards, but he's essentially mauled every motherfucker they put in front of him. | ||
| He's an animal. | ||
| So this guy versus Tony, it's a phenomenal fight. | ||
| Because Tony is a savage, and Tony fights very well off of his back. | ||
| He is a seriously dangerous guard. | ||
| You can't sleep on him. | ||
| He's durable as fuck. | ||
| He can knock you out. | ||
| He never gets tired. | ||
| And he's as game as they come. | ||
| And he's the fucking champ right now. | ||
| He's the interim champ. | ||
| You know, when he beat Kevin Lee with a triangle, he beat a top guy like Kevin Lee with a fucking triangle. | ||
| That's a big move. | ||
| Tony's dangerous. | ||
| Nasty Darce chokes. | ||
| His Darce choke is one of the best in his sport. | ||
| Kevin Lee's great, but he wasn't ready for Tony, bro. | ||
| Kevin Lee was sick, too. | ||
| He had staff. | ||
| He had staff. | ||
| Unquestionably hurt him. | ||
| He wasn't. | ||
| Tony has... | ||
| It's too high level. | ||
| That was too... | ||
| You could see in the second round. | ||
| Perhaps. | ||
| I would like to see that fight again. | ||
| You have to say that because that's how it went down. | ||
| That's how I saw it, yeah. | ||
| But I think that if you wanted to have them fight again, and Kevin Lee can go into that fight healthy, I think you'd see a very different fight. | ||
| I don't think you would see Tony... | ||
| I'm not saying that you would see Tony lose or Kevin win, but I would think you would see a Kevin Lee that could sustain his performance longer. | ||
| I think being drained from staff is just... | ||
| Right, yeah. | ||
| There's no... | ||
| I've had it before. | ||
| It's the worst. | ||
| It's not the worst, but it's not good. | ||
| Your body goes into a very weakened state. | ||
| You are not the same thing. | ||
| You're just not. | ||
| If you're a real professional, you can go out there and do your job, and a lot of guys have. | ||
| A lot of guys have fought and won. | ||
| Luke Rockhold beat Chris Weidman on antibiotics. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| He was fighting off staff when he beat Chris fucking Weidman. | ||
| That's how good Luke Rockhold is. | ||
| Guys have done it, but that's not him at 100%. | ||
| He wanted 70 or 80 or whatever the fuck it was. | ||
| There's no doubt about it. | ||
| Staph infections and antibiotics both fuck you up. | ||
| And Kevin Lee, I believe, opted to not take the antibiotics until after the fight. | ||
| So he didn't want to weaken his system. | ||
| But he's still weakened by the staph. | ||
|
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Fuck. | |
| Fuck all that shit. | ||
| Demetrius Johnson vs. | ||
| TJ Dillashaw's super fight targeted for UFC 226 in co-main event. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Where's 226 at? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| July Vegas. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Steep A, DC fight. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| That's a big card. | ||
| Let me tell you something, bro. | ||
| They got some good cards coming up. | ||
|
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That's a big card. | |
| McGregor's kept sleeping. | ||
| Don't sleep, motherfucker. | ||
| This game might run by you and shit. | ||
| These motherfucking fights are getting better and better now again. | ||
| I would love to see Steep A become a superstar. | ||
| Me too. | ||
| I think he deserves it. | ||
| And I think you look at where that guy is right now, like... | ||
| What is more American than this guy? | ||
| Like you said, with his immigrant name, what is more American than a guy who works right now as a fireman while he's the UFC heavyweight champion in the world? | ||
| He's a good dude, bro. | ||
| He's a great dude. | ||
| And broke the record. | ||
|
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He's a very good dude. | |
| Broke the record for the most defensive. | ||
| He's a very good dude. | ||
| And beat the scariest contender we've seen in a decade. | ||
| You know, again, I watch the podcast a lot and you had those guys on. | ||
| You were talking about the Tower of Jeet Kune Do. | ||
| And I think that a lot of people really miss out on the main thing. | ||
| And this is what you miss out with me and everybody. | ||
| I miss out with you? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| I don't... | ||
| You mean other people, you mean? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Like, whenever I watch these Bruce Lee fucking things and I see these kids that are 30 talking about Bruce Lee, I get sick to my stomach. | ||
| Because... | ||
| Bruce Lee didn't bring martial arts to this country. | ||
| He gave immigrants hope, bro. | ||
| I was a kid. | ||
| I had just come from Cuba. | ||
| The Green Hornet on Sunday nights, I would throw you out the window to watch that show when I was five. | ||
| And then they canceled them. | ||
| And then he came back with the first one that's supposed to be Fist of Fury, but some argue that was a flat. | ||
| That didn't do that good. | ||
| That introduced him. | ||
| It was the one in 71, the Chinese Connection, when I was eight. | ||
| That was a great movie. | ||
| That really put this country over. | ||
| It didn't mean you were a tough guy. | ||
| On YouTube, how many black guys are there that think they're Chinese and they got wisdom? | ||
| What was the guy I used to send you videos of? | ||
|
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Yeah, I forget the guy's name, but there's a bunch of those guys. | |
| Bruce Lee didn't make people tougher. | ||
| He gave immigrants blacks, he gave them hope. | ||
| How many black dudes started dressing like Bruce Lee and, you know, doing crazy shit? | ||
| Wearing kung-fu outfits. | ||
| Wearing kung-fu outfits. | ||
| You know, everybody's wrong about Bruce Lee, because I saw it. | ||
| And I saw his death. | ||
| And I saw how people would go to Chinatown because there was no internet. | ||
| Fighters still today, when they go to Seattle, they go to his grave. | ||
| I went to his grave. | ||
| I went to his grave, took a picture and gave it to Eddie Griffin. | ||
| That's why Eddie Griffin was always indebted to me. | ||
| Because I gave him a picture of Bruce Lee's grave and just shit. | ||
|
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That's hilarious. | |
| Bruce Lee, when he died, there was no internet. | ||
| They didn't report Bruce Lee's death on the news. | ||
| How did people find out about it? | ||
| You found out a week later when the Chinese newspaper hit New York and then in Chinatown. | ||
| It came out through Chinatown. | ||
| When I heard about it, I was forced to go to Chinatown and get the paperwork with the pictures. | ||
| It was an open casket in China. | ||
| And the open casket was glass around him and him. | ||
| Nobody believed Bruce Lee was dead. | ||
| Then Enter the Dragon came out, bada-bing, bada-boom. | ||
| Everybody made a million dollars and nobody said nothing. | ||
| But his death, bro, fucked people up. | ||
| Like, you know, Bruce Lee gave hope because the Vietnam War was going on and there was something else going on in this country that people don't remember that destroyed this country. | ||
| You know what shot this country down? | ||
| What? | ||
| When the Beatles broke up. | ||
| Jesus fucking Christ did people lose their mind. | ||
| So you always get into arguments with people. | ||
| Led Zeppelin's a good band. | ||
| Yeah, but wait till the Beatles get back together, bitch. | ||
|
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Really? | |
| Because they were always threatening you with the Beatles. | ||
| Dog, I like Jethro Tull. | ||
| Yeah, but they're not nothing compared to the Beatles. | ||
| So until John Lennon got shot, then those people had a voice. | ||
| Fuck you and the Beatles, bitch. | ||
| Bruce Springsteen is the man. | ||
| You know what you would love? | ||
| What? | ||
| Go to the Mirage show, the Beatles Cirque du Soleil show. | ||
| It's called Love. | ||
| It's fucking incredible. | ||
| When did you go? | ||
| Incredible. | ||
| A couple weeks ago. | ||
| You were there doing stand-up? | ||
| I was there with my family. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| And I wanted to see the Cirque du Soleil show. | ||
| It's supposed to be amazing. | ||
|
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Right. | |
| I see the original Cirque du Soleil. | ||
| Well, there's a gang of them now. | ||
| Nobody remembers, bro. | ||
| When the Beatles broke up, this country went through a tough time. | ||
| You have no fucking idea. | ||
| No, you don't have any idea. | ||
|
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If you're young, it's hard to really put it in perspective. | |
| You have no fucking idea. | ||
| When the Beatles let Let It Be out and they ended it with Let It Be Dog, that was it. | ||
| People were cracked. | ||
| White people were cracked, Jack. | ||
| Fucking incredible song. | ||
| When you think about when John died, when John Lennon died, what happened in New York that Sunday. | ||
| You think about that. | ||
| That was amazing to look at. | ||
| No, he was on another level. | ||
| The whole band was on another level. | ||
| They were very psychedelic. | ||
|
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So Bruce Lee came in at the perfect time in Vietnam. | |
| The Beatles were breaking up. | ||
| Muhammad Ali. | ||
| Muhammad Ali. | ||
| But also in 1973, this is a very interesting fact, at $15 ticket sales. | ||
| At $15, $12, $10 ticket sales, this country grossed $3 billion in concerts. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Go watch the 70s on CNN, the one about music in the 70s. | ||
| I can't say I'm surprised. | ||
| So much good music came out of that time. | ||
| That era, everybody was on tour. | ||
| They had a list of who was on tour. | ||
| Zeppelin, The Stones, La... | ||
| When I was in high school, we always went to concerts. | ||
| When I was in high school, we went to see Jay Giles Band. | ||
| We went to see The Who. | ||
| I saw Johnny Winter. | ||
| I saw Jethro Tull. | ||
| I saw George Therogood and the Destroyers. | ||
| He did a 50-50 tour in 1981. That dude. | ||
| He did 50 states in 50 days. | ||
| That was the big thing to do. | ||
| George Therogood and the Destroyers. | ||
| People forgot about Jay Giles Band. | ||
| Jay Giggles Band. | ||
| People forgot about Freeze Frame, Angel as a centerfold. | ||
| He was married to Faye Dunaway, that singer. | ||
| Whatever his fucking name. | ||
| Peter Wolf. | ||
| Peter Wolf was tremendous. | ||
| He's a bad motherfucker. | ||
| All right, Joey, I got to wrap this bitch up. | ||
| I got shit to do. | ||
| I love you, motherfucker. | ||
| Thank you for doing it. | ||
| So we're going to do this in June. | ||
| June. | ||
| Let's do it. | ||
| We're planning on it right now, folks. | ||
| We'll keep you guys updated, but I'm going to direct and put together Joey Diaz's comedy special. | ||
| We're going to let motherfuckers know. | ||
| Immigrant Mentality coming soon. | ||
|
unidentified
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See you. | |
| Bye. | ||
| Immigrant Mentality. | ||
| Bye, everybody. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| Thank you. | ||
| Thank you, brother. | ||
| You talk to Shiner already? |
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