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Aug. 28, 2017 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:53:49
Joe Rogan Experience - Mayweather vs. McGregor Recap with Brendan Schaub
Participants
Main voices
b
brendan schaub
01:10:23
j
joe rogan
01:35:12
Appearances
Clips
j
jamie vernon
00:46
| Copy link to current segment

Speaker Time Text
unidentified
That's fresh.
joe rogan
Yes!
We're live, ladies and gentlemen.
We're live, and we're here to talk about Brendan Schaub's shoes.
unidentified
This is an intervention.
joe rogan
Those fucking shoes that you wore to the Mayweather-McGregor fight.
What in the fuck?
You bought those?
Or someone gave them to you?
Is someone paying you to wear them?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Fill me out.
brendan schaub
Gucci's paying me like Jared Leto, son.
When Brian sent you the video of them, I was like, oh, God, he's going to judge me so hard.
He's going to judge me so hard.
joe rogan
It's part of you, though.
brendan schaub
I like it.
I love him, man.
joe rogan
Hey, man, I wear a fanny pack.
I gotta shut the fuck up no matter any time where there's any sort of fashion discussion.
I just gotta shut the fuck up.
brendan schaub
Fanny packs make sense, though.
The only caveat...
joe rogan
Look at those shoes.
Look at those Gucci's.
Are you like a handmaid from Britain?
unidentified
Yes.
joe rogan
In the 1800s?
brendan schaub
Those are delicious, sir.
unidentified
What's the buckle?
joe rogan
What the fuck is that buckle?
brendan schaub
Some Game of Thrones shit.
Some Khaleesi buckle that I just can't get enough of.
joe rogan
What's the B in the back?
brendan schaub
Is that a B? Yeah, that's a gold B, son.
joe rogan
That's gold?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Is this like one of that black or blue dress thing?
Where it just looks weird in the picture?
brendan schaub
I get more compliments on these shoes than any shoe I've ever had.
And, hold on, Mr. Ryan.
unidentified
They're lying to you.
joe rogan
You're a 6'4 gorilla.
No.
They're scared of you.
unidentified
No.
brendan schaub
J-Lo.
I saw J-Lo.
joe rogan
She loves your shoes.
brendan schaub
She goes, I love your shoes.
joe rogan
Of course she does.
She's a chick.
brendan schaub
They're chick shoes.
Validation.
You're wearing chick shoes.
Cosign.
joe rogan
Well, she was probably also trying to make A-Rod jealous, because they've probably been together long enough where she's starting to feel bored.
brendan schaub
Yeah, A-Rod was just pretty basic.
joe rogan
She's trying to get the crackle going.
Jamie, does that look like gold to you, or am I going blind?
brendan schaub
That's a gold beast.
joe rogan
Yeah, you can tell the gold.
Go back up to that.
unidentified
Does Golden see the buckles like silver?
joe rogan
Yeah, I guess so.
Go make it larger.
Close in on that.
Oh, is it?
brendan schaub
I mean, I just don't get the hate on those boots.
I mean, they are gorgeous.
joe rogan
They're so gross, and then on top of them being gross, they have sneaker laces, which makes them even more stupid.
unidentified
Yes!
It's so stupid!
brendan schaub
It's just not for you.
joe rogan
I guess it's like a light gold.
I'm thinking of like, you know, like...
They look gold on that one, on that TV. Oh.
Yeah, you're right.
unidentified
Wow, wow.
brendan schaub
Those are gold.
joe rogan
Does that TV suck?
Is it a contrast to a new one?
brendan schaub
Oh, no, that one looks different.
That one's better.
That looks totally white, Joe.
joe rogan
That's that TV. That totally looks good.
brendan schaub
I had to walk the red carpet after Bruce Willis in those shoes, and some guy goes, killer boots, man, like off Dumb and Dumber.
I'm like, yeah, Bruce Willis, that old ass can't pull these off.
Everyone started laughing, but I think he heard it.
I was like, oh, Mr. Diehard, please don't judge me, but I will wheel kick you on these things.
Don't get it twisted.
This ain't the movie, son.
joe rogan
Yeah, there's something about like leaving that foot, that buckle mark on someone's forehead.
brendan schaub
Embarrassing.
joe rogan
Just clang.
brendan schaub
A guy in skinny jeans and those boots whoops your ass?
That's embarrassing.
joe rogan
Do you remember when Pete Williams head kicked Mark Coleman?
brendan schaub
Oh my god.
joe rogan
Remember that?
brendan schaub
Yes.
joe rogan
It was just like, wow.
brendan schaub
What in the world?
Sounded like a bat.
joe rogan
It was also like one of those like, what the fuck?
Like, who saw that coming?
Like, we thought that Pete, who was a young guy, was dealing with Coleman, who was just all super gorilla.
brendan schaub
Super gorilla.
joe rogan
And then, you know, Pete wore his ass out and landed that perfectly placed head kick.
If he had that buckle on...
unidentified
Dead.
joe rogan
You would see that mark forever.
brendan schaub
That Gucci.
A Gucci.
joe rogan
Yeah.
I mean, Pete got him tired.
Pete Williams is a bad motherfucker back in the day, man.
Yeah, he is.
unidentified
Here it is.
Boom!
brendan schaub
Got that ASIC label on his face, though.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Damn.
brendan schaub
Enjoy them ASICs.
joe rogan
That was a big headchick win.
brendan schaub
Damn, that dude is...
joe rogan
Steak and chicken.
brendan schaub
Ain't passed the drug test.
unidentified
Boom!
joe rogan
See that?
If you had that mark, like your boots on...
brendan schaub
Boom.
And just say Gucci.
It's all Gucci, baby.
joe rogan
Yeah, if you notice, Pete kicked him with shoes on.
unidentified
Yeah, he did.
joe rogan
That was like one of the last fights that you could kick people with shoes on.
brendan schaub
So dangerous.
joe rogan
You think some more?
Like with the point?
brendan schaub
Yeah, hell yeah.
The thing about doing a wheel kick, like a spinning heel kick in some boots.
joe rogan
Yeah, I guess.
I think with a heel kick though, quite honestly, I don't think it matters.
brendan schaub
If it lands, it lands.
joe rogan
Well, there's so much power in that kick.
And if you land, you're landing with your heel.
And your heel can, it's not like a knuckle that breaks.
You never break your heel.
brendan schaub
Never.
joe rogan
I did hit somebody once so hard that my foot was sore and I was limping for a couple days.
brendan schaub
With a heel kick?
joe rogan
With a heel kick.
It was horrible.
brendan schaub
Almost hit the hell out of him.
joe rogan
He went to sleep for a long time.
They took him to the hospital.
It was scary.
I was 19. That's bad.
I didn't tell you this story.
It was a fucked up story because it made me reconsider fighting.
brendan schaub
Rodan killed and died.
joe rogan
This is a thing I said to my instructor because my instructor wasn't there.
He was in California.
I was in Boston at the time.
And he goes, I heard you had a really good knockout.
You know, in his accent.
And I go, yeah, it was scary.
I go, I caught him with a wheel kick and I go, and he just didn't get up.
And I thought he was dead.
He goes...
unidentified
Sometimes they die.
joe rogan
And he walks away.
brendan schaub
Dead serious.
joe rogan
Dead serious.
Yeah, he was training troops in Vietnam.
brendan schaub
Yeah, he doesn't care.
joe rogan
Old school.
Yeah, he didn't care at all.
And I was like, but wait a minute.
They died.
I'm them.
I'm they.
brendan schaub
Hey, man.
I'm one of them.
joe rogan
They is me.
brendan schaub
Disposable.
joe rogan
I wasn't the best.
For sure somebody could have fucked me up.
brendan schaub
Hell yeah.
joe rogan
I never got head kicked, but I saw people that I was close to get head kicked in tournaments.
brendan schaub
Did you ever get KO'd in tournaments?
joe rogan
Just TKO'd.
unidentified
TKO'd.
joe rogan
A boxing match.
A kickboxing match.
brendan schaub
I got rocked.
You got rocked and they came in and stopped it?
joe rogan
Yeah, I got rocked with a left hook.
My legs just shut off.
Boing!
brendan schaub
How weird is that?
joe rogan
It's the weirdest feeling of all time.
What people think is that it hurts.
No, a liver shot hurts.
If you get kicked to the liver or punched in the liver and your whole body And your legs just kind of give out.
That hurts.
But there's a weird thing about getting hit on the chin.
It's like everything just goes...
brendan schaub
Yeah, it's almost like a surreal feeling.
joe rogan
It just stops working.
brendan schaub
And my body would get hot.
And I'm just like...
Tense up.
joe rogan
It's a weird feeling, man.
brendan schaub
The worst, man.
joe rogan
What is it like to get completely flat-lined?
brendan schaub
It's nothing, because you don't feel anything, right?
So you don't feel anything, you don't...
joe rogan
When you come out of it, what's your most recent memory?
brendan schaub
Not much.
Everything's a little fuzzy, and then someone tells you what happened, and then you remember certain parts of the fight, like, God, I remember doing that and that, and then what happened?
You know what I'm saying?
Like, you have to piece it, like, puzzle it together.
And then you get in the back, because there's two type of people that, when you get concussed or flatlined, in my experience, you react to it two ways.
One, you get really emotional, like, heartbroken, sad, like, super, super sad.
The other gets really, really upset.
Like mad, super mad.
And I've always seen those two opposites.
joe rogan
And you think, is this from concussed?
Or is this from the emotions of losing and realizing you lost after it's all over?
brendan schaub
I think it's a combination of both.
You know what I'm saying?
joe rogan
One of the reasons why I want to bring this up is because everybody always wants to talk about the power of belief and how important the power of belief is.
And it's super important.
It's a big factor in Connor's success is this insane belief he has in himself.
But even with the power of belief at 10, you still have to deal with the limitations of the body, and you still have to deal with what is the reality of getting hit on the chin.
brendan schaub
Correct.
But that self-belief that Conor has got him into the biggest fighting combat sports history.
100%.
A little bit of doubt.
We're not here.
joe rogan
You're 100% right.
brendan schaub
We're not here talking about them.
So it's a fine line to say, ah, self-belief only goes so far.
Man, even myself, my self-belief was so high.
Probably didn't match my skills, but I was so confident I could beat anyone in the world.
I beat a lot of guys I probably had no business beating or just getting through.
joe rogan
Dude, you beat Crow Cop.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
He's a legend.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
You beat him by knockout.
brendan schaub
Yeah, but like getting through Golden Gloves, man, I thought I was the next Mike Tyson.
Probably not, but I beat most of those guys just off sure will, but I believed in my heart of hearts I was going to be the best of all time.
joe rogan
Yeah, no, you were a competitor, and there's some people that have a hard time with the big moment.
Conor obviously shines in the big moment, but at the end of the day, even with that insane belief, you get to see his physical limitations.
But what you got to see, though, is...
Well, you've got to see a lot in that fight, but you don't know what's going to happen until they do it.
brendan schaub
That's why it's a fight.
joe rogan
So he has this amazing belief in himself, and he had a really interesting style, man.
That whole thing where he was doing, like, putting his hands out there and pap-pap-papping them.
Yeah.
And then throwing off-speed punches and then dropping.
brendan schaub
How about his angles were so good, so good, and so exaggerated and big, he would get Floyd's back, and Floyd was very smart.
He wouldn't turn into him to give him more of an angle.
He would just cover up because he knew the ref was going to stop it.
The real MVP of that fight, granted, you know, Conor and Floyd, that ref.
joe rogan
Oh yeah, he let him fight.
brendan schaub
You the real MVP. Granted, he came, you know, his opening dialogue, what the hell was that?
He was just staring at McGregor like, now we don't want none of that gay wrestling and just like staring at him.
joe rogan
I don't think he said that.
brendan schaub
No, I thought he was way over the top.
joe rogan
I wanted to fight to start, so I thought he was over the top because I wanted to fight.
Come on, let's go with this fucking National Anthem!
You do that in the locker room, though.
brendan schaub
You do that in the locker room.
But I just thought it was off to the wrong foot.
But I think he...
Granted, I don't think Conor was going to win that fight as it went on.
However...
Conor did have an advantage if they went in tight.
He didn't even let it get there.
That grappling, underhooks, what?
And that was where Conor was going to get his rest.
He didn't have that opportunity.
As soon as they got there, that ref separated him.
He was going to let him fight.
He was the perfect rest.
However, I think Conor thought he'd be able to get his rest in those moments and just never was capable of doing it because the ref would separate him.
joe rogan
I think he got more tired than he ever thought he was going to.
I think also the efficiency of Floyd.
Here's what I did.
I watched it live from the third round on.
I got off stage in Washington, D.C. You didn't see the first two.
I ran up stage.
I did yesterday.
I watched it yesterday when I got home.
But I flew upstairs.
They had it on pay-per-view in the upstairs green room.
So we ran upstairs.
brendan schaub
Tight move.
joe rogan
Yeah, but I caught it on the third round.
I'm yelling to Ian Edwards.
I'm like, how's it going?
He goes, the fight's great!
This is a great fight!
So I got in there, like, right in the...
I didn't want to give...
These people waited in line a long time.
The show started late.
People bought tickets months in advance.
And I'm like, I am not cutting my show short.
I'm going to do the full show, and then I'm going to thank everybody.
Good night, and then watch the fight.
brendan schaub
You're a better person than ever, too.
joe rogan
I ran upstairs, and I got in the third round.
So I didn't see all the speech until I heard about it afterwards.
So then I tried to watch from the time they were both walking out.
But the National Anthem stopped!
Stop!
I love America!
brendan schaub
I'm not mad at Demi Lovato.
She can sing whenever she wants.
joe rogan
Go to a concert.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's an American flag.
It's on my fucking iPhone.
unidentified
We got it!
joe rogan
Okay, I love America.
Love it.
I'm a big proponent in the best aspects of America, but enough.
brendan schaub
Too much.
See, I like the spectacle.
joe rogan
And the Rockets red glare, and the bombs bursting in air!
brendan schaub
I couldn't get enough.
I was standing an ovation.
Bravo, girl!
joe rogan
She's a beautiful singer, no doubt about it.
brendan schaub
She had to read from a teleprompter, though.
joe rogan
Well, it's probably a good move.
You don't want to fuck it up.
Like, who fucked it up?
Miley Cyrus?
Did she fuck it up?
brendan schaub
There's been some people that fuck it up.
joe rogan
Somebody forgot the words.
Somebody fucked up the words recently.
Oh, Christina Aguilera.
That's who it was.
brendan schaub
Was that her?
joe rogan
That was Christina when she was going through a tough time.
She got a little heavy back then.
Remember that?
brendan schaub
Yeah, she got like unsexy thick.
unidentified
She got a little over the line to like, what's going on?
brendan schaub
Too many super sizes.
joe rogan
It's not just that.
When someone gets that big that quick, you start thinking about depression.
That was Roseanne Barr.
Well, you know what she did, though?
That was back in the day when Roseanne was on top of the world.
She grabbed her pussy and spit.
Which is hilarious.
brendan schaub
God, Roseanne did?
joe rogan
Yeah.
She's a savage.
She's a savage of savages.
And people got super mad at her.
And this was pre-social media.
But click on the YouTube link to that, find out what, or if it says there, when Roseanne did it.
What year was it?
unidentified
1990 in San Diego.
joe rogan
Yeah, see, totally before the internet.
brendan schaub
She spits on the ground right before walking off the field.
joe rogan
She's an animal.
She's an animal.
I love her.
brendan schaub
Great comic.
joe rogan
You know, Whitney is executive producing her new show.
brendan schaub
That makes sense.
joe rogan
Totally makes sense.
Two brilliant minds.
Yeah.
And Whitney's a great joke writer, too.
brendan schaub
Phenomenal writer.
joe rogan
And probably, I mean, I don't remember really talking to her too much about Roseanne.
Maybe we did.
Look at that.
She grabbed her pussy and spit on the ground.
unidentified
Jesus Christ.
brendan schaub
She's the best!
joe rogan
I maintain she's one of the top most important comedians of all time.
I've said that to her when she was here.
I said, you changed the face of women's comedy.
She did.
She changed the face of women's comedy.
brendan schaub
She got her start in Denver, son.
joe rogan
Yes, she did.
Comedy works.
brendan schaub
Yep, comedy works.
joe rogan
She's a beast.
brendan schaub
Yep, with kids.
Had all those kids grinding.
joe rogan
Kid and a dad.
brendan schaub
Yeah, moving out here.
joe rogan
The whole deal.
brendan schaub
Yeah, she's an animal.
joe rogan
She's a fucking animal.
brendan schaub
I like her.
joe rogan
So they're doing a show together, but what I was going to say is I got to think that Whitney must think about it the same way most of the comics do.
She's super respected.
Roseanne, I mean...
brendan schaub
Super respected?
That's a big job for Whitney.
Fuck yeah, it is.
Roseanne, that's huge.
joe rogan
Fuck yeah, it is.
That has the potential, especially right now.
Like, what the hell's on TV? I agree.
You know, you got Kevin James as a sitcom.
Name another sitcom.
Ready, go.
brendan schaub
I got nothing.
joe rogan
I got nothing.
brendan schaub
Goldbergs.
joe rogan
I'll tell you what I did start watching.
I started watching Ozark.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Oh my god, it's good.
brendan schaub
Ozark.
joe rogan
Ozark on Netflix.
unidentified
You haven't started that yet?
brendan schaub
Who's in it?
unidentified
Oh, you're good.
joe rogan
Justin Bateman.
That's his name, right?
brendan schaub
Oh, I like him.
joe rogan
Jason.
Jason Bateman.
brendan schaub
He gets involved with the cartel.
unidentified
Yep.
brendan schaub
I haven't seen it.
I just saw the...
unidentified
Dude!
brendan schaub
Dude, hold up.
I'm on season four of Game of Thrones.
I am balls deep in it.
You don't know.
I'm thinking about getting a dragon tattoo.
joe rogan
I think you should stay offline.
brendan schaub
People try to send me spoilers.
It ain't happening, son.
I don't even look at them.
joe rogan
Yeah, you gotta be a ninja.
brendan schaub
I'm just the biggest Khaleesi fan.
I will...
joe rogan
Just wait.
brendan schaub
Oh, I can't wait.
The Queen of Dragons, son.
Just wait.
joe rogan
Those dragons are in full bloom.
brendan schaub
No nothing, Jon Snow.
joe rogan
I'm not going to say anything, but this season finale, just Jesus Christ.
And then I see people online, where the Game of Thrones lost its way.
I'm like, how about you fuck off?
How about you stop?
brendan schaub
Oh, fucking haters.
Everyone's going to hate on anything, man.
unidentified
You know why?
brendan schaub
I'll tell you what, the White Walkers, though.
I'm on season three.
Them graphics were tough on season three.
It looked like Atari out there.
These, like, white things.
But now, I saw one.
They looked like some super beasts.
joe rogan
Oh, yeah.
They've got that wired.
They know how to do it now.
unidentified
I saw something about an ice wall in the game.
Is that real?
There's like a...
joe rogan
Shut the fuck up!
But it's like the Flat Earth, right?
unidentified
Are they the same thing?
joe rogan
It's a wall.
unidentified
Not the same thing.
brendan schaub
It's an ice wall.
joe rogan
It's not an ice wall.
brendan schaub
It's a wall.
Yeah, it's a wall.
unidentified
It's a wall.
joe rogan
I mean, I think it's covered in ice.
brendan schaub
Then there's the protectors of the wall.
They're in the north.
joe rogan
In the north, you've got to keep a wall.
brendan schaub
How good is it?
joe rogan
Wind is coming.
It's fucking phenomenal.
brendan schaub
I'm so happy.
I'm telling you, I could not sleep.
I was so happy that King Joffrey died.
That little bitch.
joe rogan
Spoiler alert.
unidentified
Hey, bro.
brendan schaub
They're on season seven.
joe rogan
I'm season three.
brendan schaub
People will get mad.
How dare you, Shob?
I'm on season one.
If it's more than three years old, I'm allowed to talk about it.
joe rogan
Yeah, for sure.
People get mad if you talk about something that happened ten years ago, though.
They get mad.
Like, if they haven't seen it, it's like you're not supposed to discuss things.
Hey, bro, I haven't fucking seen that yet!
unidentified
Hey, bro, how dare you wear the plot of Terminator 2!
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I love it, though.
I'm obsessed with Game of Thrones.
It's all I watch right now.
joe rogan
It's the best show of all time.
I think.
But I'll say that about other shows too.
Me too, I'll say that if I get excited.
brendan schaub
Me too, I'll throw that out no matter what.
joe rogan
If I get enthusiastic, don't hold me.
I'm not some fucking ranking committee.
This isn't like...
brendan schaub
This isn't the UFC rankings.
joe rogan
There's people talking.
brendan schaub
You know what, we're like the UFC rankings.
We just throw up whatever we want.
joe rogan
I think Max Kellerman is walking around today.
How many people are fucking with him?
brendan schaub
I saw him this morning.
joe rogan
Conor McGregor will not land a single punch.
Meanwhile, he landed more punches on Floyd Mayweather than any boxer ever.
brendan schaub
Than Manny Pacquiao and Miguel Cotto.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
And then people go, oh, this is freaking Max's debate.
Oh, well, that's because Floyd led him.
That was his style.
Hey, man, let's give Conor some credit.
Some credit.
His pace was so high.
I think Conor's pace was so high.
And he thought he was going to be landing more shots.
He just wore himself out.
joe rogan
There's a little bit of that.
I also think there's a little bit of an efficiency issue.
You know, John Donaher.
Go to John Donaher's Instagram page, please.
John Donaher, who's one of the best grappling coaches in the world.
Jiu-jitsu mastermind.
He's also a brilliant guy.
brendan schaub
He's the Elon Musk of jiu-jitsu, basically.
joe rogan
Yeah, super smart, innovative guy.
But on top of that, he wrote an assessment of how he thinks the fight's going to play out.
And it was to a peak.
brendan schaub
Spot on.
joe rogan
Absolutely.
brendan schaub
About the cardio and everything.
joe rogan
Is that Donaher said that he was going to stop him sometime after the fifth round.
What does it say there?
Tonight is the biggest night.
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
brendan schaub
Oh, man, it's way too long, John.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
I don't have time.
joe rogan
Well, he does that.
He's just too smart.
brendan schaub
Oh, wow.
Hey, but create a blog, though, huh?
You know?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, basically he said, here, I would consider a fine victory for Mr. McGregor if he survived 12 rounds.
Yeah, so you scroll up a little bit and he'll explain how he said that it usually works.
Yeah, here it goes.
They are quite competitive for the first three to four rounds and do surprisingly well.
that around the fifth round the elite boxer begins to figure out the unorthodox or awkward movement and begins to employ ring craft tactics to tire the MMA athlete by making work harder than he is making him miss punches, etc.
Around the eighth round a very noticeable shift occurs where the elite boxer takes over.
I expect a similar pattern tonight They're probably taking less time given the incredible skill level of mr. Mayweather That's fair.
Mayweather was clearly taking over the ninth round Mayweather was getting was fucking Connor off was teeing off on Connor and I actually texted to my friend in between rounds I'm like he's done.
They're gonna stop it.
brendan schaub
I got up in the last eighth round to go to the to the back to do something for Showtime I was like I looked at the eighth round was like oh it's over.
joe rogan
They wouldn't let you?
brendan schaub
No they did.
joe rogan
You had to go back?
You missed some of it?
brendan schaub
Well, I didn't want to see it.
joe rogan
Really?
brendan schaub
I knew it was over.
Yeah, so then but then they put me cage side.
I was waiting.
joe rogan
You didn't want to see it.
brendan schaub
Uh, not really.
I knew what was happening.
I just, I don't know.
joe rogan
How could you not want to see it?
brendan schaub
Well, I knew what was gonna happen.
joe rogan
Don't you watch Rocky movies, bro?
brendan schaub
Fuck, I wish, man.
But I'm glad they stopped it early.
I wasn't mad at the stoppage.
joe rogan
I wasn't either.
brendan schaub
I wasn't mad for a number of reasons, but he has a lot more fight left in him.
We got it.
We got it.
Connor did well.
He won some rounds.
joe rogan
He was going to get fucked up in the next round.
If he made it, if he made it into the 11th, Floyd Mayweather was going to fuck him up.
brendan schaub
Correct.
joe rogan
Like real bad.
brendan schaub
He was gassed.
But you hear Conor and even Floyd afterwards, he goes, Floyd, they go, what was the most surprising thing about this fight?
And he goes, Conor's boxing skills.
Honestly, I thought I'd be able to take over early, but I wasn't able to because of his boxing skills.
He goes, I wasn't surprised by his power.
There wasn't much power there.
Which is, you know, whatever.
He ate that straight-up flush uppercut from Connor.
joe rogan
But Connor did not seem like he was putting a lot of power in his punches.
It looks like he was trying to be, like, real active.
brendan schaub
Yeah, but then also he was, like, kind of winging them, too.
joe rogan
Well, he was hitting them with some weird stuff like this, and he even did a bunch of hammer fists and stuff.
brendan schaub
Did you know, for every illegal shot that he, if he got DQ'd for, $10 million out of his purse.
10 mil.
So when everyone's like, how do you know he's just not going to throw a knee or an elbow like a savage?
Like, well, there's 10 million reasons why.
joe rogan
Is that a male hairdresser?
brendan schaub
Yes, that was the media I dealt with on media row.
How do you know he's just not going to throw a knee and flip out?
joe rogan
How do you know?
brendan schaub
How do you know, Brendan?
joe rogan
How do you know he's not going to knee him right in the dick?
How do you know?
You don't even know.
Isn't it funny that there's a gay voice?
Like, if you do that voice, everyone knows it's a gay voice.
brendan schaub
There's not a lesbian voice.
Well, there's really not, unless it's like a butch lesbian.
unidentified
No!
joe rogan
You could be a female truck driver that loves dick if she talks like that.
She smokes a pack of Marlboros every hour.
brendan schaub
That's true.
That brass Leroy's.
joe rogan
That doesn't necessarily mean she's a lesbian.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah, Large Marge.
unidentified
Large Marge.
joe rogan
Yes!
brendan schaub
Great reference, Large Marge.
unidentified
That's right.
brendan schaub
That bitch was scary.
joe rogan
Large Marge sent ya.
brendan schaub
I saw it as a kid.
I was terrified of Large Marge.
You remember that big bitch?
joe rogan
I think her eyeballs poke out, right?
unidentified
Yes!
joe rogan
Dude, Pee Wee's Big Adventure, right?
unidentified
Yeah, that was the first one.
First one, yeah.
joe rogan
Goddamn, that was a good movie.
brendan schaub
She was scary.
Great movie!
joe rogan
Yeah, man.
Oh, we can't hear it.
Look at Pee Wee's face.
Pee Wee's all freaked out.
unidentified
And when they finally pulled the drivers Burning It looked like this You still Dude, I loved that movie.
brendan schaub
God, I'm so glad you got that reference.
joe rogan
Dude, Pee Wee's Big Adventure was one of my favorite movies when I was a kid.
I went with my high school girlfriend.
We went and we were fucking crying laughing.
brendan schaub
I loved it.
joe rogan
We just couldn't believe how hard we were laughing.
brendan schaub
It was so good, man.
joe rogan
It was so silly.
brendan schaub
And then the next one after that was Pee Wee's Big Top.
joe rogan
Big Top Pee Wee.
brendan schaub
And he had the big dance.
Hurry, Pee Wee, come!
unidentified
Ahhhh!
brendan schaub
There's a little pig that was his best friend.
Feed him sandwiches and shit while he's trying to get with that girl.
joe rogan
That is a silly fucking movie.
If you've never seen that movie and you smoke weed, you are in luck.
brendan schaub
Large Marge just makes a cameo, though.
She's not there for long.
joe rogan
It's long enough to be legendary.
We're still talking about it.
unidentified
Great reference, Joe Logan!
That movie came out in like 84, right?
brendan schaub
90s, right?
unidentified
No, no, no.
joe rogan
Like 88, 89 probably.
No, I was in high school.
That's when the show came out because I was born in 83. Pull it up.
Pull it up because I was in high school.
brendan schaub
I say early 90s, man.
My mom had the VHS. That's all we'd watch.
joe rogan
I graduated high school in 85. And this is my high school girlfriend and I went to see it.
brendan schaub
Maybe she was in high school.
unidentified
Whoa.
Oh, damn.
joe rogan
Joe Rogan.
1985. See?
Told you.
unidentified
July 26th.
joe rogan
Son?
I 100% remember being in high school, and she was in high school.
We were both in school, and we went to see it.
unidentified
Wow!
brendan schaub
Powerful, Joe Rogan.
His bike was sick.
jamie vernon
Was this coming out before the TV show, or...?
brendan schaub
I don't know, man.
joe rogan
I think the TV show was out before that.
unidentified
Before the kids' show, I guess.
I mean, there's that HBO special thing.
joe rogan
Oh, yeah, that was later.
That was later, I think.
brendan schaub
He had that show on, like, straight-up ABC, though.
Remember?
I'd watch it in the mornings.
jamie vernon
That's why I was saying, I thought it was after that.
brendan schaub
Pee-wee's Playhouse.
unidentified
Yeah.
brendan schaub
And then he got caught, like, jacking off in the theater, right?
joe rogan
That was actually after all that.
He got caught jacking off after he stopped doing the TV show.
brendan schaub
Really?
I thought it was, like, in the middle of it.
unidentified
That was in the 90s.
That was, like, 90...
brendan schaub
Bro, how's his career going to take a L just because he jacked off in a movie theater?
joe rogan
Yeah, that was back in the day where we already had VHS. Like, if you jacked off and it was in a movie theater and it was the only way to jack off, everybody's like, eh, we understand.
brendan schaub
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Give the guy a break.
joe rogan
But if you jack off in a movie theater when we have VHS, well, you're a pervert.
unidentified
Aw, damn.
joe rogan
91. Damn.
Arrested for masturbating in an adult theater in 91. That's so crazy.
brendan schaub
What was the movie?
joe rogan
Sarasota, Florida is the problem.
They had a fucking thing in Sarasota.
And how do they know that he really did jack off?
brendan schaub
He's probably really working.
joe rogan
Turned Up the Heat and Tiger Shark.
Nancy Nurse was another one that he went to see.
brendan schaub
Oh, okay.
Well, that's why people are doing those things.
joe rogan
He was only 38 at the time.
brendan schaub
38?
He's the most shot-out 38-year-old I've ever seen.
Look at that picture up there.
Look at that picture.
joe rogan
Scroll up.
brendan schaub
I like the set of hair on him too.
unidentified
Looks like a blogger that jacks off at your movie theater.
brendan schaub
That's what he looks like.
joe rogan
A guy that's in a band.
He could totally be like a bass player.
brendan schaub
Was he smart?
Is he just loaded or what?
Because he was a big deal when I was a kid.
They had merchandise and everything, man.
joe rogan
Well, he took a big hit from this.
I think if it happened today, it would be no big deal.
But also part of the problem was that he was like a childhood idol thing, because, you know, his show was a kid's show.
Even though it was kind of adult-themed in a lot of ways.
brendan schaub
Really, the word of the day?
joe rogan
Yeah, see, the HBO cable television show popularized by Pee-wee in 1982. Look at that.
Yeah, he would look up girls' skirts with the aid of mirrors attached to his shoes.
brendan schaub
Peewee's a creep.
joe rogan
The original character.
brendan schaub
He's a creep.
unidentified
Wow.
brendan schaub
We love Peewee.
unidentified
We taught kids how to do that, basically.
That's fucked up.
joe rogan
Well, everybody already knew.
brendan schaub
Yeah, back then it was hilarious.
joe rogan
It's like teaching them how to start a fire with a match.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it's all good, man.
unidentified
I don't know.
joe rogan
You don't think people can figure out how to put a fucking mirror on your shoe?
That was in old movies, man.
brendan schaub
But then he just shot a show for Netflix.
joe rogan
Did he?
They made a movie about a year ago.
brendan schaub
Like Peewee's Back, right?
unidentified
Yep, yep.
joe rogan
Wow, that's a long hiatus.
It took him that long to recover.
brendan schaub
You know what?
That little too late to, you know, like way too late.
That's like Entourage came with that movie like 10 years after the finale.
Come on, man.
joe rogan
Why'd they do that?
Did it take a long time to make the movie?
brendan schaub
I don't know.
Personality?
joe rogan
Didn't that movie do really well, though?
brendan schaub
I don't think so.
unidentified
Which one?
joe rogan
Entourage movie?
brendan schaub
Rotten Tomatoes gives it like a zero.
jamie vernon
I think it did bad, but it didn't do as good as they needed it to.
brendan schaub
It did not do well.
The critics destroyed that thing.
It was just too late, man.
You got Turtle, he's 50 on that bitch.
It's like sad.
joe rogan
Yeah, but Sex and the City can come back today and chicks would flock to it.
brendan schaub
Weren't people pissed at a Sex and the City movie?
joe rogan
They might have been.
brendan schaub
Well, you know what?
Because they can do it with them.
They go through like menopause and shit.
They're not like the young chicks anymore chasing dick.
joe rogan
Well, you know what was weird?
It was like that one character of, what's her name?
brendan schaub
Samantha.
joe rogan
Yeah, the slutty character.
brendan schaub
Straight up whore.
joe rogan
Yeah.
It gave like a lot of women, like they can go, yeah, she can do it and I love her.
Why can't I do it?
brendan schaub
That's why everyone related to that show.
Like there's the smart one, there's one that's career driven, there was the whore.
And you had one of your friends was one of them, I feel like.
joe rogan
But they loved their horror friend.
brendan schaub
Yes.
joe rogan
So it was like, it gave her...
It was the opposite of slut shaming.
brendan schaub
I agree.
joe rogan
It's like, be yourself.
Let your freak flag fly.
unidentified
Be like Samantha.
brendan schaub
Be like Samantha.
joe rogan
Everybody's not Samantha, but Samantha's not everybody.
Who the fuck you are?
brendan schaub
Who are you?
joe rogan
If you're a super freak and you're around a bunch of squares, and you're just holding it back every day, I just want to go get some strange dick.
If you miss that chick, just wants to go, just drink a couple of cosmopolitans, throw some guy your fucking king, go, let's go.
brendan schaub
Yeah, man, what's wrong with that?
What's wrong with being Samantha?
As long as it's not your daughter, your kid.
joe rogan
Or your wife.
Also, as long as you don't run into the wrong dude.
That would be the big fear, being a woman.
Run into some fucking scary guy, some murderer, rapist, some terrible person.
You're way more likely to run into that person as a woman.
brendan schaub
Oh, predators, man.
Predators.
Bank on Samantha's.
joe rogan
Dropping shit in your drinks.
brendan schaub
God, dropping shit in the drinks.
joe rogan
That's so rampant.
If I was a girl, I would be terrified of that.
I've met so many people that have told me stories about a guy drugging them or drugging one of their friends or drugging someone they know.
brendan schaub
I thought it was like an old school thing, but still goes on.
I had a friend, she told me, yeah, she was out at the club, and she goes, and I woke up.
Luckily, nothing happened, but I woke up.
No memory of what happened before.
I'm like, what?
joe rogan
Yeah, man.
brendan schaub
In LA. Like, that still happens?
She's like, yeah.
joe rogan
100%.
brendan schaub
Why the fuck would you take a drink from a dude, though?
Like, it should be, you know what I'm saying?
joe rogan
Well, it should be, like, friendly people.
Like, hey, would you like a beer?
Yeah, sure.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Give you a beer.
That's how it should be.
I mean, in ideal circumstances, she should be able to.
But there's just too many creeps.
brendan schaub
The world we live in.
Like, wouldn't you tell your daughters when they're old enough, like, hey, do not take a drink unless you're...
You know what I'm saying?
joe rogan
Of course.
brendan schaub
Like, that's what the world we live in.
joe rogan
You can't just...
It's not worth the risk.
I mean, hopefully you're going to run into only nice people who give you a drink.
And they just want to have some drinks with friends and have some laughs.
brendan schaub
Have you ever heard of girls roofing a dude?
joe rogan
Never.
But I'm sure it's happened.
I did hear.
You always heard that story about the fake urban myth about the Russian girl who gets you a drink and takes you back to your room.
brendan schaub
Takes your kidney.
joe rogan
And then you wake up, yeah, on a bag of ice.
brendan schaub
On a bag of ice.
joe rogan
You wake up with a bag of ice on your side and stitches.
Tells you to get to a hospital immediately.
You're like, what?
brendan schaub
Is that an urban legend?
joe rogan
Could be.
brendan schaub
Or it never happened.
joe rogan
That brings up Jamie's point earlier today before the podcast that we need a more reliable Snopes.
Not that Snopes isn't reliable, because apparently it's pretty reliable.
That's the answer.
That's the answer.
The problem is nobody wants to listen to Snopes anymore because it turned out that the dude who ran Snopes is a freak.
One of the chicks that is, like, his number one employee was a woman who was an escort until, like, 2015, and now she's married to him, and he's just a freak.
He's just partying all the time and having a good old time.
But why is that so bad?
Like, why does that affect...
And also, they have a left-wing bias that a lot of people...
A lot of people think they have a left-wing bias, at least.
You know, I guess.
Sort of.
Maybe.
But, I mean, if they're just relaying facts...
You can rely on them, I think, for the most part.
But that's not enough.
brendan schaub
Who can you rely on?
Like, even on that New York Times you post on Instagram, do you see they changed their headline?
joe rogan
Yeah, they changed it.
brendan schaub
They changed it.
joe rogan
Well, I went out of my way.
I was like, this is crazy.
I read the New York Times basically every day.
brendan schaub
Me too.
It should be pretty reliable.
joe rogan
I have it on my app.
brendan schaub
I have the app on my phone.
That's where I go in the morning.
joe rogan
Yeah, I get notifications from them.
brendan schaub
Me too.
joe rogan
Anytime anything happens in the news.
So, I read tons of articles from the New York Times.
brendan schaub
I looked up the guy who posted it.
joe rogan
I don't want to get personal.
brendan schaub
No, I just wanted to see what was going on.
joe rogan
Just a giant fuck-up.
You can't do that.
brendan schaub
He's also not a sports writer.
He writes more about race.
He's a young guy.
I doubt he even watched the fight.
Yeah, he goes, New York Times writer for race.
joe rogan
What?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
That seems like it would be within your best interest to keep things fucked up.
unidentified
You know, I'm not saying I'm not a conspiracy theorist.
joe rogan
Well, maybe.
I mean, look, all you had to do was say what happened is that after, you know, just say Floyd Mayweather outclasses and stops Conor McGregor, stops an exhausted Conor McGregor in the 10th round.
That's what happened.
He was exhausted.
And he got tagged over and over again, and Floyd was teeing off on him.
I mean, it was a brilliant performance.
brendan schaub
Does that really paint the fight, though?
I don't know if I put it that way.
For sure, use your words better.
joe rogan
In the headline.
You can't say, his face was completely bloodied and he almost went through the ropes.
unidentified
No, he's way up.
joe rogan
Both of those things are not true.
brendan schaub
I don't think he actually watched it.
Reading that headline, he probably looked at the maybe photos or someone else's narrative of the fight.
joe rogan
Yeah, but if he looked at photos, even the photos.
brendan schaub
There's no bloody.
joe rogan
No.
brendan schaub
I guess a photo of Connor outside the ring?
Well, he's never outside the ring, for God's sakes.
joe rogan
Look, I saved the photo, man.
brendan schaub
No, no one's face was bloody.
joe rogan
There was no bloody, period.
I mean, it just wasn't bloody.
Like, you could see his face.
I got a photo of the actual stoppage itself.
And at the moment the stoppage happened, he was...
I mean, he had like a little bit of a mouse under his left eye.
There it is right there.
Look.
No blood.
brendan schaub
Yeah, he had a mouse from the right hands landing.
Yeah, no blood.
Neither guy was...
joe rogan
You don't even see the mouse there.
You see his right cheek.
It's under his left cheek.
brendan schaub
It's just red.
joe rogan
His eyes were red.
brendan schaub
Bo, did you hear 100 million illegal streaming downloads?
100 million illegal streams.
joe rogan
Holy shit.
How much revenue did they lose?
brendan schaub
How about this?
How crazy is this?
Floyd's warm up in the back.
Someone from his team goes, Yo, Floyd, the systems in California and Florida are down.
He goes, God damn, those are huge markets.
Here, I'm going to delay until they figure it out.
That's how conscious this motherfucker is before this huge fight.
joe rogan
That's good.
brendan schaub
He goes, I'm going to wait.
I'm going to wait.
joe rogan
That's worth millions and millions of dollars.
brendan schaub
That's what I'm saying.
How brilliant is he?
That was my takeaway with working with Showtime and getting so close to Floyd and doing all this stuff.
He's so goddamn brilliant, man.
I had preconceived notions like, he's a good boxer.
How good of a businessman?
How involved is he?
No, no, no.
He doesn't let anything go in touch without overseeing everything.
joe rogan
He's both.
brendan schaub
Everything.
unidentified
He's both.
brendan schaub
He's brilliant.
joe rogan
He's brilliant as a producer, or as a promoter, and he's brilliant as a fighter.
brendan schaub
Brilliant.
joe rogan
Brilliant.
brendan schaub
And they asked him about, so I was in the fighters' meetings, and they have all the Sears Showtime guys there, and we're mic'd up, and the All Access crew, and Floyd's crew.
And they go, hey, be careful, because last time we did this with Floyd, he didn't really know the guys, and he kicked them out in front of everyone.
It was super embarrassing, so I'm like, oh, that sucks.
So I'm in my suit sitting there, and everyone's so serious.
I'm like, this is so serious, so stuffy in here.
So the guy goes, Jim Gray.
Jim Gray goes, hey Floyd.
They're like writing their notes down.
I'm just sitting there like staring at him.
And they go, you know, you always walk out with like an entourage usually for your fights.
There's usually some big celebrity or something like that.
Who's it going to be this time?
And I know previously you had beef with Justin Bieber.
So I was like, well, better now than never.
I just went out of turn.
Not the Biebs!
Not the Biebs!
joe rogan
And did Floyd laugh?
brendan schaub
Floyd, he's talking dead serious that Jim Gray has his glasses on.
He takes his glasses off and goes, Damn, dog!
I'm trying to be positive up in here.
We're trying to be positive.
And I go, I start laughing.
I go, I know!
unidentified
All I'm saying is Beeb isn't walking out with you, man.
brendan schaub
What's wrong with that?
And he started laughing after that.
Everyone was literally like...
On pins and needles.
And I was like, come on, man!
joe rogan
So Biebs is all about church now, huh?
Is that the thing?
Like, he unfollowed Floyd and Floyd got mad at him?
brendan schaub
Yeah, and that guy...
joe rogan
You can't unfollow your boy.
brendan schaub
You can't unfollow your boy ever.
And that guy...
joe rogan
I will never unfollow you.
brendan schaub
Ever, bro.
If we do, then there's some serious beef.
joe rogan
It's not happening.
Floyd Mayweather clapped back at Justin Bieber.
unidentified
Yo, man!
brendan schaub
Trying to be positive!
joe rogan
He's just a pop star, Floyd says.
Well, it's got a point.
Just a pop star, who is probably the biggest pop star on the planet.
brendan schaub
Biggest ever, yeah.
joe rogan
They said he canceled his tour, like he stopped his tour because of this Jesus thing.
brendan schaub
That priest guy.
I know that guy, and I've been to Bible study with that guy.
I've been to dinner with that guy.
unidentified
Really?
brendan schaub
He's an interesting dude.
If you're Ball's Demon Jesus, he's your guy.
joe rogan
Keep talking.
Tell me more.
brendan schaub
I don't want no bad juju on me.
joe rogan
You don't want to be the golden snitch for pop stars?
brendan schaub
I don't know what's going on there.
joe rogan
I don't know what's going on there.
But they were saying that Justin Bieber already made $93 million this year before he canceled the tour.
brendan schaub
How fucking nuts is that?
joe rogan
That kid is balling so hard.
brendan schaub
Even him?
And then I think he has something to do with Kyrie Irving too.
And Kyrie's like, yeah, I want out of Cleveland.
Like, this motherfucker has some power.
He's like, Jesus wants you to play for Boston, you know that, right?
joe rogan
So what is he doing to them, trying to get them to, well, look, maybe he's doing something, maybe I'm looking at it the wrong way, right?
So if he has a positive influence on him, maybe he's saying, listen, man, you're so involved in show business, you've got to think about living and life.
Not only that, here's the thing, man.
Once you make 93 million dollars, it's basically over.
brendan schaub
Life changes.
joe rogan
But I'm saying it's over.
Just relax.
It's over.
brendan schaub
True.
joe rogan
You put that fucking money in the bank, you don't have to work anymore.
Like Connor.
Yeah.
All the work you do from here on out is gravy.
This is what you do now.
You do what you want to do.
Do you want to go and do a bunch of concerts in front of all these people, or are you doing too much?
Because if you're working, like if you, if you had to go and do theaters, like now you've been doing a lot of stand-up.
If you had to do theaters Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, every week, flying everywhere, you'd be so tired.
brendan schaub
I'd be like Amanda Bynes.
You'd just see my hair's all fucked up.
I'd be going crazy.
I'd be like Cat Willings.
joe rogan
I engineered how I do like this Latin mindset.
This is the first tour that I ever named, the Strange Times Tour.
The first time I ever sold a bunch of tickets in advance like this.
brendan schaub
Smart marketing.
joe rogan
But I engineered that when I'm doing these fly to two places, I'm off for a while.
brendan schaub
That's because you have the power to do it, though.
joe rogan
You have to do it that way.
Bieber has the power too.
brendan schaub
100%.
joe rogan
He just canceled everything.
brendan schaub
Kanye West did the same thing.
joe rogan
Well, Kanye West did after they checked him into the loony bin.
brendan schaub
He was going crazy.
They said he would do that concert, come home, and he had all this work he had to do with Adidas and clothing, and they just said he was working nonstop.
And a small glimpse of show business and stand-up and all this stuff, I can see how being on a tour that long, you're going to go fucking batshit crazy.
I can see a little bit.
When I saw it, I went, oh, I bet, man.
That's crazy.
joe rogan
Well, you know what a big factor for me is?
A big factor for me is when I'm at home, I'm going to sleep for eight hours, and I have a schedule in terms of my runs, my lifts, whatever workout I'm doing, whatever kind of thing I'm doing.
I know where I can train.
I know the schools I can train at, I know the gyms I can train at, and I know what to do.
That keeps me sane.
Having those...
I can work out on the road and it's good.
It's definitely better than nothing.
But it's not the same of being able to have this normal...
It keeps my energy up and it keeps my anxiety down.
All those things get balanced out when I'm at my normal workout routine.
When I go on the road and I'm doing three days in a row...
It's hard because I don't want to work out too hard because I don't want to be tired for the two shows.
I've got two big-ass theater shows.
But I can't imagine those guys who do five nights.
So they're flying in.
So I did two shows this weekend.
So I flew in three days.
I took three flights.
You know, that's crazy.
brendan schaub
Crazy.
joe rogan
But that's nothing compared to those guys that do it five days a week, six days a week.
brendan schaub
Well, even still on private jets, it's still exhausting, man.
unidentified
It's exhausting.
brendan schaub
It's still the same thing.
Same thing.
joe rogan
I mean, you don't have to...
It goes more on your schedule, I guess, if you're flying everywhere with a private jet, but it's still fucking exhausting.
brendan schaub
It's still a beast, man.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
So I get a little bit.
joe rogan
People are like, oh, you poor baby.
brendan schaub
Oh, I know.
unidentified
Poor baby.
brendan schaub
Oh, 93 million.
I'm like, they already have money, so it's not that.
joe rogan
That's the thing.
brendan schaub
They're already set there.
joe rogan
It's already gravy.
brendan schaub
But back to the Bieber-Floyd thing.
Thank you.
Again, I had preconceived notions of Floyd Mayweather before I met him, been around him.
So does this religious guy.
He thinks, oh, Floyd's just about hoes and cars and stuff like that.
That's all.
I guess, but there's more layers to that.
So for you to judge him based off social media and say, Bieber, quit following, quit hanging out with him because he's just about that.
No, you don't know shit.
You're judging that guy because he's not going to church every Sunday.
You know what I'm saying?
You're judging him based off Instagram, which isn't fair to do.
joe rogan
I think he's saying, I don't know what he's saying.
But I would imagine if someone tells you to stop following somebody, they're saying that person's a bad influence, right?
brendan schaub
Which isn't fair to say, because Floyd doesn't drink, has crazy work ethic, oversees basically Showtime sports.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, he's healthy.
joe rogan
Yeah, but it's girls, bro.
Strip clubs.
You own the strip club, bro.
brendan schaub
Some of the women he hangs out with, I ain't never seen anything like that.
That's what 15-0 gets you.
I mean, jaw-dropping shit.
joe rogan
Hundreds of millions of dollars.
unidentified
Hundreds of millions of dollars.
brendan schaub
What are we doing here?
And they just look at me like a bag of shit in these Gucci shoes.
Those goofy shoes.
I get it.
Not 15-0, girl.
joe rogan
Hundreds of millions of dollars.
Did you see that all-access where they showed that fucking stupid watch they bought him?
That Hubolt gave him?
brendan schaub
Dude, I met with the guy from Hubolt.
He'll tell me all about it.
joe rogan
Dude, that watch is so gross.
brendan schaub
Nuts.
joe rogan
It's so stupid looking.
It's all crystal on the outside.
brendan schaub
Was it $1.28 million?
joe rogan
No, it was $500,000, I think.
brendan schaub
They made him another one for $1.2 million.
They made them three.
It's crazy.
joe rogan
The watch is all crystal.
The outside of it is all crystal.
brendan schaub
That's nasty.
joe rogan
It's so stupid looking.
It looks like a cheap watch.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I agree.
Not my style.
I do love Hublot, though.
Shout out to Hublot.
joe rogan
Yeah, they make great watches, but that thing, the LaFerrari, isn't that what it's called?
brendan schaub
Yeah, there you go.
joe rogan
It looks gross.
brendan schaub
Did you see the money belt?
joe rogan
Yes.
brendan schaub
They handed me that thing.
This is real.
It's kind of small.
It smelled like they just...
Killed that alligator on the spot.
It smelled like hummus and alligator.
It smelled like shit.
But then there was just like gold all over it.
I was like, oh my god.
joe rogan
Diamonds and shit and rubies.
brendan schaub
Do you know who made that?
joe rogan
Who?
brendan schaub
Floyd Mayweather's team.
It's basically a gift to him because they thought for sure he was going to win.
They're like, yeah, here's this crazy money fight belt for $1.2 million we designed ourselves.
Here you go, Floyd.
joe rogan
Wow.
brendan schaub
Tight move.
joe rogan
1.2 million dollars for that ugly belt.
brendan schaub
I was all up on that thing.
joe rogan
Well, tell me about this then.
Are those red?
Is the red all...
What are those?
Are those gems?
What is the red stuff?
Like in the flags all around the WBC? Nah, those are just like colors.
brendan schaub
Those aren't real.
That's not real.
But the diamonds and all that and gold, all that's real.
Most swims of belt of all time.
unidentified
Damn.
brendan schaub
That thing was sweet.
joe rogan
It's pretty dope looking.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I was all up on it.
joe rogan
If you're into like...
600 sapphires, 160 emeralds.
brendan schaub
3,000 diamonds, son.
joe rogan
3,360 diamonds.
It weighs three pounds of 24 karat gold.
brendan schaub
That thing was tiny, though.
joe rogan
Three pounds of gold!
unidentified
That's so insane!
brendan schaub
Like, I was holding it.
It was like a little belt.
It wasn't like the big-ass belt.
joe rogan
It looks normal-sized.
Are they all like that?
brendan schaub
Maybe I'm just fucking Shaquille O'Neal, but if you look at the picture with me, it looks small.
joe rogan
Look at those chicks when they're holding it up.
unidentified
Click on that.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it doesn't look small.
joe rogan
How weird are the fucking ring card girls in boxing?
They stand around behind everything and smile.
brendan schaub
They're like the girls from fucking The Stepford Wives.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
For hours!
joe rogan
Dude, that's all they do is pose with that big smile.
It's so odd.
It's like they don't express any personality.
They don't do anything other than stand there and have that same smile.
brendan schaub
We can't have fucking doing bits up there and shit.
What do you want them to do?
joe rogan
Yeah, but they're not like looking at each other and talking.
They have to stand there and smile.
brendan schaub
They're like those English soldiers.
They do nothing.
And I'll tell you what, Corona does it right.
joe rogan
Like those English soldiers, that is what it's like.
brendan schaub
That's what they're like.
Corona does it right.
I'm not mad at any of them.
There was no slump busters.
All of them were tens.
All of them were stone-cold tens.
joe rogan
Slump busters.
brendan schaub
All of them were straight stone-cold tens, man.
joe rogan
Yeah, and smiling.
brendan schaub
Yeah, and just not moving like robots.
joe rogan
Yeah, and one hand on the hip.
brendan schaub
I feel like they hit them.
They smiled and hit them.
Those bitches were in line.
joe rogan
They just dropped that belt on their head.
brendan schaub
Dude, how about...
Just like that alligator dick.
Whoops.
joe rogan
Clunk.
brendan schaub
How about I'm doing, before the weigh-ins, I'm doing a pre-fight show, and Floyd Mayweather Sr. is standing to my right going...
You don't know shit.
You don't know what the hell you're talking about, Shobb.
You don't know shit.
And I'm like trying to get through it and not pay attention to him.
And that stops.
I go, bro, what are you doing?
Come on, man.
What are you doing?
I'm selling the fight.
I'm putting money in your son's pocket, man.
You need someone up here to talk about it.
What are you doing?
And he just goes, ah, you know what you're talking about.
Like, Jesus Christ, man.
Relax.
joe rogan
Yeah, he's a smooth talker, that senior.
brendan schaub
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, real smooth.
joe rogan
It's like...
Imagine if you're Floyd and you like literally see your future if you keep getting hit in the head, like right in front of you.
brendan schaub
Yeah, heavy stuff.
joe rogan
But that's gotta be one of the reasons why he's so brilliant defensively.
Not just because he learned from his dad, he learned from Roger Mayweather and all the people in the gym that he trained with, but also he sees the effects of...
brendan schaub
I'm sure, man.
joe rogan
Chronic punishment.
And his brother, or his uncle, rather, as well.
brendan schaub
Yeah, both of them.
joe rogan
Roger Mayweather, he's not doing well either.
brendan schaub
No, none of them are doing great, man.
None of them are doing great.
joe rogan
He's perfect, though.
40 years old, speaks perfect.
brendan schaub
Sharp knows everything about it.
Everything.
And they thought that Javante Davis, oh, you probably didn't see her doing the show.
joe rogan
I did see that afterwards.
unidentified
Oh, you did see it?
joe rogan
I saw it yesterday.
brendan schaub
He's a kid who they thought was going to be the next pay-per-view king, and you can tell I asked Floyd, and he's just like, mmm, he's missing a few things.
He goes, because you just can't be 30-0 with 30 knockouts and expect to be a megastar.
You have to have everything.
He's like, so he has to work on so much more, I don't know.
He's 130 pounds.
It's tough.
joe rogan
Yeah, he missed weight, too.
brendan schaub
He missed weight, but he took the fine short notice.
He missed weight, had a horrible fight.
joe rogan
How short notice?
brendan schaub
I want to say he took it on two, because I think Sean Porter was supposed to fight, and then he backed out, so then they booked this dude.
He's fun to watch, though.
He has the most intense tattoo I've ever seen.
joe rogan
What is it?
brendan schaub
It's on his forearm.
He's from like the straight hood of Baltimore.
And as he's talking, I look down to stare at people's tattoos.
And it was an apartment building, brick building on fire.
And in front of the apartment building is a mass burglar, black burglar, with like the old school robber mask on with a bag of money and a gun.
unidentified
What?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
I was like, shout out to that terrible tattoo.
joe rogan
Jesus.
brendan schaub
He had a bad fight, though.
That was kind of his platform to do something, but I don't see him being the next big thing.
You can tell Floyd, too, is like...
Before, he's like, this is the next up-and-coming guy.
He's the next Floyd Mayweather.
And now I'm like, he's the next Floyd Mayweather.
He's like, not really.
Let me tell.
He had a rough fight, too.
joe rogan
Yeah, it was a rough fight.
He clipped that dude behind the ear or behind the head.
But that's just like where punches land when people duck.
brendan schaub
Yeah, sometimes shit happens.
joe rogan
Yeah, and you know, the guy was complaining about it.
He went down.
brendan schaub
I'll tell you what was cool is after the fight, I'm in the back and I see Amir Khan, Terence Crawford, and Andre Berto.
And so I go to talk to them and they were all like super complimentary of Conor McGregor.
Like, dude, he can box, man.
I'm like, right?
Like, what do you think?
You're just going to go and look like an asshole like Bart Simpson and fly across like this?
Like, what do you expect to happen?
Like, we just didn't expect him to get any rounds.
We thought he was just going to be outclassed.
I'm like, nah, man.
joe rogan
He has a tremendous belief in himself.
And he had a weird style.
That strange style of off-speed punches, extending his arms fully and then pop them in there.
brendan schaub
And in the back, even Pauly goes, I gotta be honest, I was kind of glad to see that because when I went against him, like the first four or five rounds, I couldn't land shit because that style, like it takes forever just to get used to it.
I didn't know what to do.
He's like, so I just thought maybe I was having an off day, but once I see that and I see Floyd do kind of the same thing, you know?
Granted, Floyd fought a different style, but I don't give a shit.
joe rogan
Yeah, that style's legit.
It's legit.
You know, I mean, that's just too big a leap.
That's all it is.
For Conor to go and his first professional fight, fight arguably the greatest fighter of all time.
It's like he's 100% in the mix now at 50 and 0. At 50-0, it's 100% in the mix that he's the greatest fighter of all time.
You think about it defensively, no one's even close.
No one's been hit as little as him.
And Conor hit him.
Yeah, and he's beat everybody.
And obviously he fought Conor a different way than he fought everybody else, that's a fact.
Conor hit him more than any fighter that ever fought.
brendan schaub
Here's the other thing.
Here's kudos to Conor and Floyd, but especially Conor.
When's the last time you saw an exciting Floyd Mayweather fight?
joe rogan
True.
brendan schaub
Conor went at him.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's when Conor asked the fight.
I turned him into a Mexican.
Oh, that's hilarious.
brendan schaub
Did you see that?
joe rogan
Yeah.
You didn't hear that?
brendan schaub
No.
I missed a lot of that.
Conor brought the fight out of him for the first time.
First time since I don't know who.
You know what I'm saying?
You can say, well, last finish was Victor Ortiz.
That was shit.
That was kind of a cheap shot.
He really didn't bring it to him, but Conor brought it out of him, man.
joe rogan
This was legit.
brendan schaub
It was cool, man.
joe rogan
And when I watched it the second time, knowing the result, then you really appreciate what Floyd's doing.
Because although Conor did catch him, he definitely caught him with a hard uppercut in the first round.
brendan schaub
Best shot, yeah.
joe rogan
That was interesting.
Because that was like, oh, shit.
You've got to realize, mind your P's and Q's, this guy's legit.
But Conor, even though he clipped him with that shot, never really hurt him except that one shot to the body.
brendan schaub
Which I was surprised.
I've got to be honest, in my prediction, I thought Conor was going to do well like he did in the first rounds.
I called that.
I thought he was going to win four to five rounds.
And then I thought maybe that upper cup would wobble him, and that would be enough to win Conor kind of the spectacle.
Just, you know, Floyd's chin and, you know, just the boxing power's a little different, man.
joe rogan
It definitely is different, and I don't think Conor's loading up, either.
You know, I don't think Conor is really, like, digging in on these shots, because I think he was probably concerned about his endurance.
You gotta realize, also, this fight was relatively short notice.
So short notice that I had already booked the DC Improv in advance, and it was sold out by the time they announced the fight.
brendan schaub
Correct.
joe rogan
So, or not the DC Improv, the Warner Theater in DC. So if you think about that, That's fucking months in advance.
brendan schaub
Three months.
This fight was announced three months ago.
joe rogan
That's nothing.
brendan schaub
That's nothing for this magnitude of a fight.
joe rogan
Most of the time, a fight like this is six, seven months out.
Easy.
brendan schaub
Oh my god, easy.
joe rogan
Maybe more.
brendan schaub
When did they announce Canelo Triple G? Been a long time.
It's been a while.
joe rogan
I think between the time they announced it and when the fight starts, I gotta feel like it's five months at least.
brendan schaub
At least five months.
joe rogan
Which is normal.
brendan schaub
I would assume...
But at least they also, boxing was smart because they set it up, right?
So they had Canelo Chavez Jr., that was a joke.
But that was literally just a setup to get him to Triple G, and they both knew it.
So you're looking at basically a year in the making.
And before that, what, two years in the making?
joe rogan
And here's more importantly, during that entire time, they're both boxing.
So Conor's not.
He's not really sure if he's going to actually have this boxing match with Floyd Mayweather, right?
So he knocks out Eddie Alvarez, and then somehow or another the rumblings get started.
But that's just not enough time.
A few months to prepare for Floyd.
brendan schaub
I agree.
Especially in that arena, the best of all time in that different arena.
But Floyd goes, listen, I tried making this fight before this, and the UFC turned it down.
And he goes, alright, we'll see what happens.
And then he goes, and I came back and was like, yo, this is how much money we could make.
And he goes, and then they were like, alright, let's do it.
He goes, but I tried making this fight a while ago, but even before this.
joe rogan
Yeah, I remember the discussions.
But to be that close, like when they actually announced it.
Okay, this is actually happening.
brendan schaub
Crazy.
joe rogan
It's crazy to have it so quickly.
brendan schaub
Especially this magnitude of a fight.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's nuts.
So if something like that, if you gave Conor like six months...
Maybe he could get in better shape or he could survive.
He's never going to be against a guy like Mayweather who was so efficient and his movement is so crisp.
This is how I was describing it to a friend of mine.
brendan schaub
Does your friend have a boxing or martial arts background in any facet?
joe rogan
He was trying to figure out why he would get so tired.
No.
Gotcha.
I go, okay, when you tie your shoe, you tie your shoe, you don't even think about it.
You just go, right?
But if you have to think about tying your shoes, it takes more energy.
And you have to think, and then you've got your tents.
I go, Floyd's just tying the shoes.
brendan schaub
He's reacting.
joe rogan
Yeah, he's just so...
He's so good.
He's been doing it so long that he's just got it ingrained in his movements.
Conor has to think way more than Floyd does.
And Floyd is constantly pressuring him, so Conor's backing up all the time, which wears you out.
brendan schaub
And also the volume of punches.
He's at a really high pace.
He thought he was going to be able to stop him maybe a little more, stop him from coming forward.
He wasn't prepared when Floyd put his head in his chest and did work.
The ref didn't allow him to get his rest in the clinch.
But listen, at the end of the day, I'm all about the glitch in the matrix, man.
I think Conor's a glitch.
It was so much fun that he even pulled this off.
It's awesome.
He didn't dishonor the sport.
I thought he did really well.
I told Conor, I said, I'm proud of you, man.
What he did?
Win or lose?
unidentified
Meh.
brendan schaub
This is nuts.
joe rogan
His belief in himself is incredible, but even that is not enough if you fight a better boxer and your body gets tired.
So that's what we saw in that fight.
In the beginning of the fight, if he could have maintained, somehow or another, if he was in good enough shape, that he could maintain the pace that he had- The first three rounds.
The movement that he had in the first three rounds for the entire 12. Gotta fight.
It's a well, a way different fight.
Because he's dangerous, he's quick, he's moving away.
He has a huge endurance problem.
And this is like something that comes back to, for boxing, obviously.
brendan schaub
You don't think he has an endurance problem in UFC as well?
joe rogan
He may.
brendan schaub
Because if you look at his attributes, Joe.
joe rogan
He did, certainly in the Nate Diaz fight.
brendan schaub
The only one that went five rounds.
joe rogan
The first fight.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
But if you look at his attributes, I'd say endurance is, you know, and everyone knows I'm a kind of dick rider, but if you go on, you know, his strengths, I'd say it's at the bottom as far as his strengths.
joe rogan
I agree.
brendan schaub
It's not bad where it's like, you know, it's not good.
joe rogan
It's not good.
Look, here's the best endurance in the sport.
Mighty Mouse.
For sure.
brendan schaub
Well, he doesn't count.
He's out.
joe rogan
True.
brendan schaub
You're 125 pounds.
You're out.
Cain Velasquez counts.
joe rogan
Cain Velasquez did count.
Cain Velasquez counts.
At the height of his career.
You know who else has phenomenal cardio?
Neil Magny.
Neil Magny's phenomenal.
brendan schaub
Neil Magny the gazelle has some phenomenal cardio.
joe rogan
Phenomenal cardio.
Amazing pace.
brendan schaub
So does, you look at guys, you know, Jon Jones has good cardio.
joe rogan
Very good cardio, yeah.
brendan schaub
Might be EPO, we'll figure it out.
We need to talk about that.
Can't trust anything.
joe rogan
How disappointing was that?
How disappointing was that?
brendan schaub
Broke my heart, Jon Jones.
joe rogan
Dude.
brendan schaub
You broke my heart.
joe rogan
Dude, Jamie sent it to me.
I was at Universal with my wife and my kids.
brendan schaub
I was texting with you, because what was I doing?
Oh, I was working for Showtime, and I had my phone, and then I look, and I have 70 missed texts and 23 missed calls.
I'm like, what the fuck happened?
I'm like, someone died.
unidentified
Oh, no.
brendan schaub
Who died?
And I look, and it's like Jon Jones, like...
Someone might as well die.
joe rogan
Jamie sent it to me.
I thought it was a joke.
brendan schaub
Me too.
I thought people were messing with me.
joe rogan
I looked at my phone.
I was like, this is no way.
brendan schaub
And then you sent it to me.
You're the first one I texted.
I went, is this real?
You went, yes.
Broke my heart, Jon Snow.
joe rogan
Once you start talking back and forth with the Golden Snitch.
brendan schaub
That Golden Snitch.
There's zero jokes there.
And listen, when the Golden Snitch comes out with something...
They've ran that pisser through a ton of tests.
It's not fake news.
joe rogan
It's not some flat earth shit.
Apparently, a court- I don't think I can say this.
brendan schaub
Bring it, because I talked with an expert about this drug, and he fucking dropped some knowledge on me.
joe rogan
Okay, this is what I've heard.
This may or not be true.
The reason why I don't say this is because I'm not 100% aware.
Maybe we can find some information online available.
What I had heard is that this drug is not detectable in blood, that it's a drug that's detectable in urine.
brendan schaub
And a new test, right?
joe rogan
Is it a new test?
brendan schaub
From what I heard, too, is the USADA, they have a new test.
Obviously, they'll announce, hey, we're doing this now, everyone.
Welcome to the party.
And this drug was also, it's very common around power lifters.
Because you can use it in competition, and by the time you get tested after it, it has an hour's half-life.
So the shelf life is super short, but you take it and it makes you super aggro and strong.
And they go, it's so hard to obtain legally, most everyone gets a black market.
And when you get a black market, you don't know where it's coming from.
And a lot of time, and this happens with a lot of powerlifters and other athletes, when they test hot for this, it's because they got a bad batch or something else mixed into it.
This is coming from a super knowledgeable dude who knows about it.
joe rogan
Oh, it makes you aggro, huh?
Confident, aggressive.
brendan schaub
Yeah, he's like, it makes you like, oh.
And he goes, and it lasts maybe an hour, maybe two hours max, and that's out of your system.
unidentified
No.
brendan schaub
He goes, so that makes sense why someone would fail directly after, because it- No, no, no, no, no.
joe rogan
No, he failed after the weigh-in.
That's when he failed.
This is after the weigh-in.
brendan schaub
I don't think so.
unidentified
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Are you sure?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Well, either way.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Well, maybe it's like lingering.
brendan schaub
Well, that's what he's saying.
He's getting better at these tests.
He's saying, but also I heard they're using a new test, too.
joe rogan
Maybe someone gave him a tainted sandwich.
brendan schaub
Made some tainted dick pills.
Either way, he broke my heart.
I'm off the train.
I'm off the goddamn train.
And I'm sick of the, we have no idea what happened.
It was just dick pills.
I'm like, I'm out!
I'm out!
How dare you!
joe rogan
Well, is he offering up any possible scenario for what happened?
brendan schaub
No, he tweeted out like, this is when I find out who my real friends are.
joe rogan
Hashtag blessed.
unidentified
Oh, boy.
brendan schaub
Fuck that noise.
joe rogan
That sounds like you're feeling sorry for yourself.
brendan schaub
Jesus ain't helping you out of this one.
joe rogan
So much to be grateful for.
brendan schaub
Well, it's going to be the UFC money, but yeah.
joe rogan
That's different.
Yeah, he's got a nice family.
brendan schaub
That's true.
joe rogan
Good friends, hopefully.
brendan schaub
Whatever.
joe rogan
Who knows what the fuck is happening?
But here's the thing, man.
brendan schaub
Where they smoke, there's fire, Joe.
joe rogan
They tested it multiple times, by the way.
brendan schaub
In USADA, since the Golden Snitch has been around, he's a motherfucker.
I like the guy, but if you're a fighter, he's a motherfucker.
joe rogan
Well, hey, he's doing exactly what he's supposed to do.
Protect fighters from people doing steroids.
brendan schaub
Ruined the sport, sir.
Ruined the sport.
You ruined baseball first.
Now you're here.
joe rogan
No, the fighters are ruining it because they know what the fucking parameters are now.
brendan schaub
Ah, let's have some fun!
joe rogan
Ah, I agree.
I agree.
I don't look...
Look, here's the thing about this fight.
brendan schaub
Do you think Dana's ever like, God!
joe rogan
What kind of testing was done for this Floyd Mayweather-Conor McGregor fight?
brendan schaub
Are those new lights?
Yeah, bro.
I like what you're doing with the place, man.
joe rogan
You know what, man?
I like the curtains, right?
When I put the new studio, I'm going to do the curtains.
brendan schaub
Yeah, you should, man.
Yeah, but Nowitzki is a guy that you don't want on your bad side.
joe rogan
Oh, no.
brendan schaub
But do you ever think Dana's like, damn, bro, relax.
unidentified
Relax.
brendan schaub
We hired you, but Jesus, crimity.
joe rogan
They knew what they were getting into, and you know what?
They just decided this is only one way to clean up the sport.
Bring in the guy who's the very best at catching people for doing drugs.
Bam, bring him in.
brendan schaub
Bam, did they do it?
Here's the thing.
Jon Jones, since USADA's come in, he's failed three out of four tests.
The only one he didn't fail, he fought OSP. Coke is coke, brother.
unidentified
Coke is coke, bro.
brendan schaub
Oh, so that's fine?
joe rogan
Bro, what's coke?
brendan schaub
Do a few lines and just fucking...
Vanderlei Silva, Pride style, just...
joe rogan
How come you can drink a giant Monster Energy drink?
That's one of the sponsors.
brendan schaub
Ah, because it's not Coke.
Ah, because it's a goddamn drink.
joe rogan
Have you ever done Coke?
brendan schaub
No, I haven't.
Have you?
joe rogan
No.
No, it's one of the few...
brendan schaub
I know.
joe rogan
I'm scared of it.
brendan schaub
I don't like uppers.
joe rogan
Heroin, too, obviously.
But I didn't do heroin, but when I did get my knee operated on, they had me on a drip.
I guess it was morphine, and I get to hit the button every time you wanted, and I'm just, bam, I was firing it in there.
brendan schaub
I celebrate that.
joe rogan
I guess they let you fire it in to a point where you can't die.
I can't imagine you'd be able to keep hitting that button and then die.
I wonder what the limit is.
brendan schaub
I think it depends who you are, right?
Because you probably have a high pain tolerance with your background.
joe rogan
But also, I was bored.
So if I'm bored, you give me this button that I can press.
brendan schaub
Let's get high for God's sake.
joe rogan
Let's keep pressing this motherfucker.
Watching some terrible local television show that I can't change the channel.
That's how you get addicted.
Oh, I'm sure.
brendan schaub
That's how you get super addicted.
joe rogan
I'm sure.
brendan schaub
Yeah, someone gave me a bunch of these gummies, these weed gummies, and I can't rest it, and I'm always thinking about something.
So I took the weed gummy and Mars Attack was on.
That shit was epic.
I've seen it so many times.
I feel like it's always on late at night for me.
It's like my go-to.
joe rogan
It's a great movie.
It is like a truly great movie.
unidentified
Right?
joe rogan
And it's so like silly.
It's so well done.
brendan schaub
And the cast is just phenomenal.
They want to redo that, I feel like.
joe rogan
Didn't Jack Nicholson play two different people in that movie?
brendan schaub
Yeah, he played like the high roller like Vegas guy.
And he played the president.
unidentified
Yes!
brendan schaub
Jim Brown's in that movie.
joe rogan
That's right, Jim Brown's fucking everybody up.
He plays like a Sonny Wilson character.
unidentified
Look at Jack Nicholson as the high roller.
brendan schaub
And then Martin Schwartz in it too.
joe rogan
Look at the fucking picture of the alien.
Jesus Christ, look how cool the alien looks.
They were awesome, man.
Look at his clothes.
That was when the alien was the girl.
Remember he thought he was going to get the pussy?
unidentified
Oh, she was all hot.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
And that was Pierce Boston, wasn't it?
joe rogan
Pierce Bronson was in it?
brendan schaub
Yes.
joe rogan
He was in it too.
brendan schaub
Am I crazy?
joe rogan
There he is.
brendan schaub
And then remember him and what's her name?
Sarah whatever from Sex and the City.
Remember her and him, their heads get switched onto dogs.
joe rogan
Oh, that's right!
That's right, they cut their heads off and put them on dogs.
What a fucking great movie.
brendan schaub
Remember Jack Black?
He was in the military and he just runs at him and gets murked right away in front of the family on TV. He's all, fuck, and I'm going in.
Rush is in.
joe rogan
They were so fun.
See if you can pull up just a video.
We can see them moving around.
brendan schaub
Dude, I feel, especially for 1996, this was some Avatar shit.
joe rogan
Oh my god.
brendan schaub
It was legit.
joe rogan
Yeah, man, I did a movie, or what was it that I did?
I did something with one of the guys.
Was it Christina Applegate in that, too?
Oh, what's her name?
Who was that girl?
brendan schaub
Christina Applegate's not in this.
joe rogan
No, that was the girl from The Big Lebowski, Tara Reid.
unidentified
Really?
joe rogan
Wasn't that her?
unidentified
Right there.
joe rogan
Isn't that her?
unidentified
No.
brendan schaub
Who was that?
That was like the yoga bitch who was all into it.
joe rogan
Isn't that Tara Reid?
unidentified
Yes.
brendan schaub
And remember, she releases the doves.
joe rogan
Oh, that's, what's her name?
Warren Beatty's wife.
Annette Bening.
That's who that is.
brendan schaub
Here come the powerful Martians.
joe rogan
Fuck, that movie was good.
brendan schaub
Dude, look at this.
unidentified
Let's not be too rash.
brendan schaub
Powerful James Bond.
unidentified
Hi there.
Are you interested in the White House?
joe rogan
Hot alien broad.
Look at that.
unidentified
Boom!
joe rogan
Yeah, it's Annette Bening.
brendan schaub
There's Jack Black!
unidentified
His family sees him murked on TV. They get the TV! She cracks the shotgun!
This could be a cultural misunderstanding.
But be prepared for a few changes to what we...
joe rogan
Oh, what a great pussy.
unidentified
You're Tom Jones, right?
It ain't unusual!
As we must learn...
We shot the fuckin' tubs!
Ha!
brendan schaub
There's just that!
unidentified
To a new Jew.
Uh...
Nicholson.
Get along.
Get in close.
Kick the crap out of them.
brendan schaub
What a lineup!
unidentified
What, in your view, are some of the things that the Martians can teach us, Professor?
Quite a lot about Mars, I expect Natalie.
I forgot about the giant robot.
brendan schaub
Me too.
Remember that Grandma figures it out?
By music.
Kills him.
joe rogan
Oh, that's right.
Spoiler alert.
brendan schaub
The crazy-ass Grandma.
unidentified
Hey, we all make mistakes, Mr. President.
joe rogan
I remember they swallowed a nuclear bomb, they tried to nuke them, and they put it in a balloon and inhaled it.
unidentified
Ah, ah!
brendan schaub
What a great movie.
Tim Burton.
Shout out to Tim Burton.
joe rogan
Tim Burton's a bad motherfucker.
brendan schaub
I didn't know that.
Hell yeah, he's bad.
joe rogan
He's made some awesome movies.
And they're always so weird, too.
It's like, what a crazy guy he must be.
brendan schaub
He must be batshit crazy.
joe rogan
He did Pee-wee.
That's right.
brendan schaub
He did Pee-wee Herman?
joe rogan
Which one did he do?
The first one?
brendan schaub
Was he the greatest man of all time?
joe rogan
Wow.
brendan schaub
He did Batman.
joe rogan
He did the early Batman too, right?
brendan schaub
First of all, he sold Michael Keaton as Batman.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's right.
jamie vernon
Is it about the Joker movie that they just announced?
joe rogan
No.
brendan schaub
With Jared Leto?
unidentified
He's not going to be in it.
jamie vernon
I think Martin Scorsese and Todd Phillips are making a Joker origin story.
brendan schaub
Oh, that's my boy.
joe rogan
I thought Jared Leto, everybody loved him as the Joker.
He's not going to be in this episode.
brendan schaub
No, but you're talking about two different ones.
So Jared Leto's doing a spinoff Joker 2, but this one my boy Todd Feldman put together with Todd Phillips and Martin Scorsese.
joe rogan
Scorsese.
brendan schaub
Scorsese.
Jesus Christ, speech impediment.
Anyways, yeah.
joe rogan
The Joker origin story on deck.
Todd Phillips, Scott Silver, Martin Scorsese.
brendan schaub
And it's dark.
It's like a dark Joker.
As a kid, he had a permanent smile and everyone made fun of him.
It's like on the streets of Brooklyn.
It's like super dark and real.
I can't wait.
joe rogan
Who's playing the Joker?
unidentified
I don't think they announced yet.
brendan schaub
Well, I'm going to make the announcement here.
You're going to do it?
No, yeah, right?
I can't wait.
joe rogan
I love that stuff.
That's a tricky role, right?
Like, Heath Ledger did it.
Yeah, that's one of those roles where, like, Jack Nicholson did it.
brendan schaub
Jared Leto killed it, too.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's what I heard.
brendan schaub
They said on set he would, like, send the cast, like, weird shit in the mail.
He went full Joker.
Oh, boy.
Yeah, he'd send them, like, dead rats in the mail.
joe rogan
I might have to kick his ass.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I'd be like, bro, come on.
No, I get the whole Joker thing.
joe rogan
Let's relax.
brendan schaub
Send me that Gucci cape you're wearing, for God's sakes.
Not the goddamn snakes you keep sending.
joe rogan
He was in a movie that documents his issues with a record company that Jamie, you're always recommending.
What's that called again?
brendan schaub
Jared Letters in it.
joe rogan
I remember what it's called the other day.
unidentified
I'll look it up real quick.
joe rogan
It's something about his band.
brendan schaub
30 Seconds from Mars.
joe rogan
Yeah, they had some deal.
Artifact.
unidentified
It's called Artifact.
joe rogan
Artifact.
That's the name of the documentary.
So he had some deal with a record company and couldn't get out of it.
And it was apparently...
They made a brutal documentary about it, and it won all these awards.
brendan schaub
Is it on Netflix?
joe rogan
I gotta tell you, I gotta be honest with you.
When I see awards in between those leaves, when they write things in between those leaves, I ignore it, because it looks pretentious.
brendan schaub
Oh, dude, it sells me every time!
It must be good.
joe rogan
Why do you have what you have to say framed in between fern leaves?
Is this ancient Rome?
What the fuck are you doing?
unidentified
God, it works.
joe rogan
Is this hieroglyphs?
It doesn't work at all with me.
Works with me.
brendan schaub
It's like when I see a company that says, world's best coffee, I'm like, I gotta try it.
I'm that guy.
joe rogan
You should start framing all your posters that you send out for your gigs.
brendan schaub
And leaves?
joe rogan
Quotes about you.
I'll make a quote.
You can put it inside leaves.
I'll say he's fucking hilarious.
unidentified
Joe Rogan, then two leaves.
joe rogan
One of my funniest friends between two palm leaves.
brendan schaub
Joe says he's alright.
Get tickets here.
joe rogan
What the fuck is with the palm leaves, man?
brendan schaub
It makes it more official.
joe rogan
It's stupid.
Pull that back up again.
That shit looks stupid.
brendan schaub
God, I see that.
I'm like, this shit must be good.
That's why they do it, Joe.
joe rogan
First of all, why do they have five of them?
Get the fuck out of here.
That means you got ten palm leaves.
brendan schaub
That movie's killing it.
unidentified
Get out of here.
That's why.
brendan schaub
Because Jared Leto's involved.
That's why.
joe rogan
No, you get ten palm leaves.
You took up all that.
Make those quotes bigger so I can actually read them while I'm putting on my reading glasses.
unidentified
Yeah, what's it say?
joe rogan
Look how much smaller the quotes are than the fucking, the subtitle.
brendan schaub
That's a bunch of independent awards, that's why.
joe rogan
Gotham Independent Film Awards, Audience Award winner, DOC New York City Festival, Official Selection.
Oh, it's all bullshit.
unidentified
Yeah, that's right.
joe rogan
Toronto International Film Festival, People's Choice Award.
South by Southwest, 24 beats per second, official selection.
Oh, you put that?
You put that inside of palm leaves, official selection?
brendan schaub
That's some bullshit one.
joe rogan
You just want to have Melbourne, Melbourne International Film Festival, official selection.
You just want to have your shit in palm leaves.
See, that's exactly what I'm saying.
That's why they have the quote so small, they're fucking with you, Shob, and you're just eating it up!
brendan schaub
I'm eating it up.
I'm gonna go home and watch it.
joe rogan
Don't let them get you with those goddamn leaf shubs!
brendan schaub
They got me, brother.
Every time.
Every fucking time.
joe rogan
I'm not impressed by leaves.
No.
How about one good quote from somebody that I think I respect their opinion.
brendan schaub
Like a legit actor.
Like, I enjoyed this movie.
joe rogan
Yes.
brendan schaub
Martin Lawrence.
joe rogan
Yeah.
unidentified
Huh.
brendan schaub
Interesting choice.
unidentified
I wanted to say Marlon Wayans.
joe rogan
I always thought the fucking record business was shady.
Kevin Hart.
brendan schaub
Yeah, that'd be great.
joe rogan
That would be great.
Yeah.
Selection.
What does that mean?
You didn't even win.
Did you win or did you not win?
brendan schaub
You won some cool awards, you know?
joe rogan
We didn't even win that award.
That's an official selection.
You get selected, bitch.
That doesn't mean shit.
Can't put that inside of palm leaves.
I got picked.
I went on a date with that girl.
Did you fuck her?
brendan schaub
No.
She selected me.
Selected me?
unidentified
There's something.
It just got brought up because I just saw it.
There's something interesting about Jared Leto.
I don't see what you guys think about this.
jamie vernon
He's got a pseudonym that he directs under.
joe rogan
Bartholomew Cubans?
unidentified
Yeah, Cubans, I think.
brendan schaub
Okay.
Bartholomew Cubbins.
unidentified
You see it pop up from time to time.
joe rogan
Oh, he directed it.
unidentified
It's his name.
Oh.
joe rogan
That's smart because he doesn't want people to think about him.
He just wants them to think about the movie.
brendan schaub
Yeah, but pick an easier name.
Can we just call you Bart on set?
Bart Cubbins?
joe rogan
Maybe he was on like fucking weird drugs.
brendan schaub
Oh, I'm sure he was on some shit.
Dude, he did the MTV Awards last night before.
He's sponsored by Gucci, so he has way too much.
He has a Gucci scarf, cape, glasses, all this shit on.
Just because they sell it doesn't mean you have to wear it.
Anyways, so they're asking him about his appearance and his performance.
He's like, trust me, you've never seen anything like this.
I don't want to give it away.
And I'm a Jared Leto fan.
I was like, this is going to be some shit.
This motherfucker just did...
You mean the Predator?
He just did the night vision.
Predator thing.
Look at this.
Come on, bro.
What did he do?
He just did a Predator vision.
We did this in the 90s.
Look, that's it!
joe rogan
That's the whole video?
brendan schaub
Yeah, he was like, it's like some avatar shit.
You've never seen this before.
joe rogan
See, because first of all, you're not really obsessed with this, like he's obsessed with himself.
So that's part of the problem.
And then second of all, you're probably not on the same drugs he's on.
But if you were, go full screen with that.
I don't feel like you're giving the full effect.
brendan schaub
You're talking about the predator of eye vision, son?
joe rogan
No, it's a little bit more than that.
It's a little bit more than that.
It's kind of freaky.
brendan schaub
I kind of like it.
joe rogan
He's got a hat on.
You can see it through the hat.
brendan schaub
It's not that creative, though, I feel like.
joe rogan
Interesting that you say this.
brendan schaub
And he's a creative dude.
joe rogan
Maybe it's good.
Maybe if you're high on ecstasy, this would be the best video ever.
brendan schaub
Yeah, you might be right.
unidentified
It's live.
jamie vernon
I don't know how much that has to play into it, too.
joe rogan
Are they a good band?
brendan schaub
Yes.
He's phenomenal.
joe rogan
I've literally never heard their music.
brendan schaub
Oh, you would know it.
unidentified
They probably have, I bet.
joe rogan
Really?
jamie vernon
They've been around since...
joe rogan
That boy can act, too.
He's got a lot of kids behind him.
Who are all these people dancing?
brendan schaub
That's his entourage, son.
joe rogan
Are they dancers?
Yeah.
Imagine if everywhere you went you had dancers.
brendan schaub
Be kind of cool.
His beard isn't cool.
joe rogan
You don't think that looks good?
brendan schaub
No.
The hairiest beard.
Dude, how about this, Joe?
MTV fucked up so bad, and I love MTV. How about they fucked up?
How about, because Jared Leto toured with Chester, the guy who committed suicide from Linkin Park, and with the guy from Soundgarden, who also committed suicide.
He's known two of his best friends.
So they have him do an open monologue for him, right?
Just tell them how great they were.
And he goes, alright, let's cut to the last time Chester performed on stage here.
And they're on top of Hollywood and he's singing.
And MTV cuts the feed into you.
MENTOS! Have you had your Memphis breath today?
And they just cut it off.
unidentified
What?
brendan schaub
And they come back like, hey, it's Nicki Minaj's ass!
Yeah, they did this whole dedication to them.
And then halfway, not even halfway, 20 seconds of performance, cut it to commercial.
joe rogan
Huh.
brendan schaub
It was rough.
joe rogan
Why would they do that?
brendan schaub
I don't know.
joe rogan
Why wouldn't they play the full song?
brendan schaub
I don't know.
People were so upset.
They thought it was so disrespectful.
unidentified
Was it an accident?
brendan schaub
I don't know.
I don't think so.
I think they were just like, yeah, we gotta cut the break.
Hit that Mentos commercial.
joe rogan
Man, I, you know, look, I'm very biased about this because I don't interrupt podcasts with commercials.
But there's a big difference between like watching shit on Netflix and watching shit on regular TV or watching shit on HBO and watching shit on regular TV. I don't watch commercials.
You get brought out of the whole hypnotic effect of seeing a show.
brendan schaub
It breaks your focus.
joe rogan
100%.
brendan schaub
If Game of Thrones is a commercial, there's sometimes in Game of Thrones I don't breathe.
Like when that Red Wedding, I was like...
Oh dude, just wait.
joe rogan
Just wait till some shit happens with certain said dragon.
brendan schaub
I'm trying not to get so close to anyone because everyone dies.
joe rogan
Shut the fuck up.
You can't get close.
brendan schaub
I got close.
You cannot get close.
If something happens with Khaleesi, man, I'm gonna bust.
joe rogan
Oh, shush, shush, shush, shush, shush.
brendan schaub
We can't talk.
We can't talk.
joe rogan
We can't say anything.
brendan schaub
A dragon slayer.
unidentified
She's such a beast.
joe rogan
She's the mother of all dragons.
brendan schaub
I know.
joe rogan
She's not a slayer.
She would never slay the dragons.
brendan schaub
That's true.
You know what I'm saying, though.
joe rogan
Yeah, dude.
brendan schaub
Yeah, but there's like interruptions in the Game of Thrones.
Like, I'm in the zone, man.
I'm in the zone.
joe rogan
I tried watching Walking Dead once on regular TV in real time, and I was like, I can't even do this.
brendan schaub
I just flip through all the channels.
As soon as commercials I flip through, I just record them so I can fast forward them.
I don't get how they make money off these ads anymore.
joe rogan
Well, that's my point, is that this is a very ineffective way.
To promote things, and I think it would probably be a more effective way, like, think of all the ads they have in a show, right?
They have all these shows.
Wouldn't it be, like, way more effective if they had one very good or two very good ads at the beginning of the show, and they say, like, Game of Thrones is brought to you by...
unidentified
Boom!
joe rogan
And they do it.
If you've got to do that...
brendan schaub
I agree.
joe rogan
Have it in the beginning, and know that this show sponsored this entire episode, so that the episode doesn't have to have...
That's just so business greedy.
brendan schaub
They do it, but yeah, they want to do those 30-second spots to get all that money for the network, right?
joe rogan
But the thing is, those breaks, they ruin the art, so they make the creation worse, so it makes it less valuable.
It makes it less valuable to sell ads on.
No one's watching them.
No.
You're going to get a fraction of the people watching them, and a lot of people are going to be upset by them.
brendan schaub
I agree.
And they just don't work.
The advertisement agency, you know, they come around, obviously podcasting, because if someone's going to listen to your show for three hours a day, you know, it's just a different dynamic.
But you're also not up there reading, you know, whatever sponsor MeUndies.
You're not just reading in the middle.
Like, if you're like, hold on, Brent, let me do this real quick.
joe rogan
Well, a lot of people do do that.
I just don't think it's the right way to do it anymore.
I just think the only reason why we're doing it that way is because everybody always did it that way before.
That's how you saw it on television.
That's how you heard it on the radio.
They always interrupted for these ads.
I don't think that's the most effective way to do ads.
I just think that we got used to doing it that way.
brendan schaub
I think it upsets people.
joe rogan
It definitely does.
brendan schaub
I think it turns people off where they're like, fuck that product.
joe rogan
You know, people used to say, well, what if someone has to take a leak?
Well, you don't have to do that anymore.
You can pause things now.
You can watch HBO and pause it.
I mean, we have different control over media now.
And ultimately, we're going to get to a point where you can watch things, almost everything's going to be on demand, the way Netflix does it.
brendan schaub
It's the future.
joe rogan
It's the future.
brendan schaub
Imagine doing a Comedy Central special and there's commercials through your special.
joe rogan
That's what mine was.
That's insane.
My last Comedy Central special, I had to break it up and I edited it for commercials.
And I even recorded it for commercials.
I knew that it was going to be 44 minutes.
brendan schaub
Damn.
joe rogan
I had to do it during this constraint and when we're going to drop things in.
So it had to make sense when you shut it off and then went to commercial.
It's very complicated to edit that way.
brendan schaub
It's tough enough as it is.
joe rogan
Yeah, and it's not good to watch it that way.
It's just not.
I mean, it's better than not watching it at all.
But the best way to watch something is all the way through.
But here's the question is, say if you're a company, right?
Like, outside of podcasts, which are pretty easy, just do the ads in the beginning, how do you sell things now?
Like, say if you're...
Pick a product, if you're Mentos.
If you're Mentos?
brendan schaub
I sponsor that show, and I pay enough where they don't need the other ad revenue, and I get the beginning and the end.
joe rogan
But is it worth it for them?
Because that's a tangible amount of money, right?
If you're going to have one sponsor for the entire show, think of how many sponsors that Video Music Awards must have.
brendan schaub
A dozen.
joe rogan
How many do they have?
brendan schaub
Dude, this performance is brought to you by Pepsi, and then they hit it, which is almost better than doing a full Pepsi commercial.
joe rogan
I guess.
brendan schaub
I don't know.
joe rogan
You still don't want to hear it.
Like, how do you advertise something without interrupting something else?
There's got to be a way.
Because it seems so sneaky.
But they've always done it this way.
You're watching something.
You don't want to hear the ad.
You've got to sit through the ad.
unidentified
Alright, alright, alright.
joe rogan
Get back to what I like.
And then you get back to it.
brendan schaub
But I wonder if they must be seeing a return, because otherwise they would stop, right?
Obviously, I bet it's down, but the advertising agency is so big, the industry is so big, because who really watches things live now besides sports?
Game of Thrones, I'm on season four, for God's sakes, came out years ago.
There's other shows, like my other shows, Hard Knocks, HBO, no commercials.
And if there's commercials, I literally just won't even see one.
Who's really sitting there when it's live?
joe rogan
I watch commercials on HBO for upcoming programs.
brendan schaub
Those aren't really commercials.
They're not selling you a product.
They're showing you other cool shit they're developing.
joe rogan
It's like previews at the movies.
Yeah.
brendan schaub
I dig that.
joe rogan
It's like, hey, here's some cool shit you might want to watch.
They're not selling you anything.
brendan schaub
Exactly.
But even at AMC, when those delicious ice-cold sodas pop out, I'm like, you know what?
I might have to have one.
joe rogan
Yeah, but that's before the movie.
See, perfect example.
brendan schaub
I expect that.
joe rogan
And they also have that after they showed you a bunch of really cool shit with the previews.
brendan schaub
You've already got my approval.
We're already friends.
joe rogan
Or if you get there real, real early, it's a slideshow.
brendan schaub
Oh, those are a bugger.
joe rogan
You're like a loser.
When are you going to start showing me some things that move?
unidentified
Lights are on, bright white screen, and then it's just like ads.
brendan schaub
Yeah, that's right.
joe rogan
And it's like a local Italian restaurant.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it's always some bullshit.
Always.
joe rogan
The best bread and the fucking things in between palm leaves.
unidentified
I feel like a loser.
Yeah.
joe rogan
Their awards are in between leaves.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it's just you and your buddy.
joe rogan
Yeah, man.
You do feel like a loser.
Yeah, you feel like a loser.
Like, oh my god, we're idiots.
We got here so early.
You know, there's a lot of these movie theaters that are taken off that are in places where you get assigned seating and they sell booze and they bring real food.
brendan schaub
That's what I do.
joe rogan
There's a lot of those now, man.
There's a ton of different ones.
brendan schaub
It's great.
I pick.
You go there.
It's so nice, man.
joe rogan
Dude, there's so many of them now.
You don't have to like...
brendan schaub
It's good food, too.
unidentified
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Like, really good food.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Some dude was eating a steak next to me and shit.
joe rogan
There's that Cineopolis.
Here we go to that one.
brendan schaub
No.
joe rogan
Arclight's good, too.
brendan schaub
Arclight's good.
There's some really good ones.
joe rogan
Well, they figured it out, man.
It's like the same thing that airports have figured out.
Hey, we don't have to have only shitty food.
How about you have a nice little restaurant right here in the airport, and they started doing that with Wolfgang Puck's in LAX, and then it's accelerated.
They have lemonade now.
There's a lot of good stuff at the airport now.
brendan schaub
Good coffee.
joe rogan
You can get real food at the airport now.
brendan schaub
Dude, San Francisco has like straight up five course meals.
joe rogan
Like it's legit food.
brendan schaub
DIA has a chop house, steak house.
joe rogan
Oh yeah.
Oh yeah.
New York has a...
JFK. JFK has some serious restaurants.
We ate some killer Italian food.
brendan schaub
Really?
unidentified
Killer.
joe rogan
Like really good.
Some serious shit.
Yeah, everywhere has figured that now.
They're like, look, you've got people coming in and out.
A lot of these people are business people.
A lot of these people have money.
brendan schaub
They want good meals.
joe rogan
Yeah, they don't want to just eat McDonald's.
brendan schaub
Even the plain food's getting better, too.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Depending on where you're at.
joe rogan
They have an Osteria in LAX now.
brendan schaub
I know.
joe rogan
Like a fancy schmancy little place with a tasting menu.
brendan schaub
I love that shit.
joe rogan
I'm getting hungry.
brendan schaub
Me too.
unidentified
Damn.
joe rogan
Are you still sticking to the keto diet?
brendan schaub
I went pescatarian.
joe rogan
Oh, how dare you.
brendan schaub
No, just to mix it up.
I did keto forever and I go back to it.
joe rogan
Pescatine.
Only fish or do you eat scallops and mussels too?
brendan schaub
Scallop and mussels.
joe rogan
Lobster?
brendan schaub
I'm not a huge lobster fan.
joe rogan
How dare you?
brendan schaub
I made some lobster and then I grilled it up real proper like.
joe rogan
Grilled it up?
Why not just throw it in the dirt and let it get heated up by the sun?
brendan schaub
Grilled lobster?
What do you like your lobster?
Boiled?
joe rogan
Boiled like a man.
brendan schaub
No.
joe rogan
Yeah, throw it in by yourself.
brendan schaub
That's JV. What?
I could grill that thing, man.
Did you kill it first?
I don't kill anything.
I just buy it from the store with the tails.
unidentified
I'm not fucking lobster diving for God's sake.
joe rogan
You're grilling lobster tails?
Jesus Christ.
brendan schaub
What do you do?
joe rogan
What the hell are you?
You're out there fucking- You get them live.
brendan schaub
Oh fuck.
You get them live from where?
joe rogan
It's 2017. What are you talking about?
Grocery stores have tanks.
You go to a grocery store and get live lobsters.
brendan schaub
Jeremy, what's the last time you saw a goddamn lobster tank?
joe rogan
They do.
unidentified
I don't know.
brendan schaub
You go to Rouse or some shit, maybe they have that inhumane tank.
joe rogan
They have it at a lot of places.
brendan schaub
Where they're like crawling to get out.
joe rogan
Dude, they have it at a lot of places.
unidentified
No!
joe rogan
Yes!
Listen, I'm telling you.
brendan schaub
I haven't seen that since I was a kid.
joe rogan
They have one at Gelson's.
Right up the street from here.
You go there.
There's a tank of water.
Scoop up a fucking lobster.
Give me that one right there.
It's about two pounds, sir.
Okay.
We'll take that one.
That's a good one.
brendan schaub
Am I batshit crazy?
I haven't seen that in forever.
joe rogan
You only go to Whole Foods, that's why.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I'm fancy.
joe rogan
You don't fuck around.
Amazon bought Whole Foods.
You hear about that, right?
unidentified
I know.
brendan schaub
Changing the game.
joe rogan
Slashing prices.
brendan schaub
And their stock, as soon as they bought it, went boom, boom, boom, boom.
They paid, whatever, 12 billion.
Their stock went up 22 billion.
joe rogan
You want to make some money?
brendan schaub
Yeah, sure.
joe rogan
Get rid of those fucking people in the parking lot that harass you when you're walking out with a car.
You got ice cream.
It's 150 degrees outside.
And they're like, can I have two minutes for gay rights?
unidentified
And they put their finger in front of your face like, hey!
joe rogan
I vote, man.
I vote for gay rights.
You can't just get me.
You're ambushing me when I'm coming out with my fucking cold food.
This guy did that to me.
Stuck his finger in my face.
brendan schaub
Is that at Gleason's again?
joe rogan
Gelson's.
Gelson's is a gym in New York.
brendan schaub
That's right.
At Gelson's, they did that shit again?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Fuck that place.
That thing only happened to me once where the guy said, can I have two minutes for gay rights?
Or one minute for gay rights?
Whatever he said.
That only happened to me once.
But I've been stopped for a bunch of other things.
A bunch of other things.
Sometimes they have a whole fucking table set up.
brendan schaub
Oh, yeah.
They have a table set up.
Third Street or Abbot Kinney, there's a table set up for Syrian children, blacks, Asians, white privilege.
joe rogan
Here's the problem with those things.
I don't have the time to research where this money's going.
brendan schaub
I don't trust people.
Oh, for sure.
How do I even give the kid money?
joe rogan
For sure, there was some girl, real aggressive, way back in the day, it's like more than 10 years ago, at the airport, some black chick, with a bucket, an open bucket, and she had some binder with a bunch of photos in it and stuff, and she was saying, you know, we're collecting money for this.
brendan schaub
That sounds legit, I'm giving her money.
joe rogan
And she goes, and she was like, real aggressive about it.
I go, yeah.
I go, you have a binder and you have a bucket that you want me to put money in.
And she was like, well, fuck you then.
And I was like, fuck me then.
Oh, okay.
I go, that makes a lot of sense.
You're super charitable.
That's what Yeah.
I go, you're stealing people's money with some stupid scam.
Like you have a bunch of photos of like downtrodden people that's in some sort of a binder that's buying plastic.
Poor effort.
And you can close this binder and you tuck it because you're going to get busted.
unidentified
100%.
joe rogan
And you get this weird bucket that's wide open.
You could scoop anything out of it.
And then I ask you about it.
You say, fuck you.
brendan schaub
Was there any money in there?
joe rogan
Oh, yeah, there's like a couple bucks in there already.
You know, it was one of those weird things.
It's like, who's to stop you from taking that money?
brendan schaub
I just don't trust that.
Like, I was off of the 90s the other day, and I came to stop, and I saw this huge banner that said, help us pay for our father's funeral.
It was like four black guys.
joe rogan
And I'm like, God.
brendan schaub
I gave him a little 10 spot.
Not a 20. Let's not get crazy, but...
joe rogan
The problem is, you don't know.
brendan schaub
That's the thing.
unidentified
I don't know.
joe rogan
I mean, if it really is, I mean, if this girl really was trying to raise money for a charitable cause that's really good...
She didn't represent it very well.
unidentified
Good for her.
joe rogan
She just seemed like a scammer.
Like, I got out, I was like, look at that binder.
It's just some pictures.
They're folded up in a binder in some printed piece of paper.
unidentified
It's half-ass.
brendan schaub
There's just too much stuff going around.
Yeah, yeah.
You just see too much bad stuff.
joe rogan
It's also like, the bucket at an open top, like, you can just reach in that bucket.
You can drop things in the bucket.
Where's the accountability?
brendan schaub
Show a little effort, girl.
joe rogan
But that's a good scam.
If you're a person that wants to scam people, that's a great scam.
It's a smart move, sure.
brendan schaub
It's like some bullshit.
joe rogan
Oh, you're gonna make money, dude.
If you go to Vegas, or not Vegas, LAX, rather, and you're walking down that where people are arriving, first of all, they just want you to get the fuck away from them.
They'll throw $5 in there.
Maybe one out of ten.
Maybe one out of ten will give you money.
One out of ten gives you money.
You're seeing hundreds of people, and the people are gone.
It's not like you're doing this in a restaurant where they can see you do it to one person and the other people see you coming.
Yeah, everybody's constantly filtering out.
brendan schaub
I don't think security's going to let you do that.
joe rogan
Well, I think that's why she had the binder.
And that's why, like, the whole bucket thing was very bizarre.
brendan schaub
This was a while ago, I see.
joe rogan
Oh yeah, a long time ago.
brendan schaub
Yeah, security might move along, lady.
joe rogan
Yeah, this was more than ten years ago.
But I'll never forget, like, how aggressive she got with me to, like, the point where my adrenaline fired up.
Where I was like, whoa, this girl might, like, swing at me.
brendan schaub
That's always the worst.
joe rogan
Yeah, she was like...
When she said fuck you, she was like in my face.
brendan schaub
Because you couldn't tell, like...
joe rogan
It was enough to know that she has definitely hit people before.
brendan schaub
Yeah, she's not playing.
joe rogan
It was just a person that was a little too aggressive.
brendan schaub
A little too aggressive.
joe rogan
So I'm like, whoa, am I going to get in a fight here?
You get to that feeling like, am I going to have to get in a fight with a chick at the airport?
brendan schaub
Those nerves.
Dude, I... When I was in the back after the fight, right?
So again, I'm with...
joe rogan
I heard about this.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Tell me about this.
brendan schaub
Can we just clear it up now?
So many people have been blowing me up.
So again, I'm with Terrence Crawford, American, Berto, and I'm in the back and they're saying how good Conor did.
I'm like, yeah, great.
I thought he was going to do even better.
I'm surprised he did well.
And Showtime won me go do this post-fight show thing.
So I'm going, and I see Nate Diaz, and he's by himself.
Like, no one's really by him.
He's by himself.
He's on his phone.
And I see him, and I think, oh, same fraternity.
UFC guys.
There's no UFC representatives there, really.
There's like, Dana, I didn't see him at the fight.
I just figured, hey, we're brothers in arms here.
Yeah, what's up, man?
But I was going towards him because he looked busy.
I was going towards him.
And whether he wanted my help or not, I figured I'd know a few things about marketing.
The next fight for him is Conor.
I'm assuming he's there to sell that fight.
That should be the next fight.
Conor vs Nate Diaz 3, the trilogy.
That's the fight.
So I was going to go to him because I saw some interviews where he was kind of hating on Conor.
And I would have spun it the other way.
He should have celebrated Conor and what he did winning rounds against the best of all time and saying, look, I beat him up worse than Floyd.
Now we're going to do this trilogy.
I'm going to end him faster than Floyd did.
Like, that should be the sell.
I was going to go talk to him about this.
So I see him out of the corner of my eye.
I'm like, oh, and they're like, come on, Brandon, we gotta go.
I'm like, let me just say what's up to this guy.
I'm like, yo, Nate, bro, how about that fight, man?
Your next biggest fight in UFC history, brother.
And he starts laughing.
He's like, oh, hell no.
How fucking stupid do you look now?
And I'm like, I'm like caught off guard.
I'm like, what?
He's like, how stupid do you look?
Talking all this shit.
I'm like, whoa, whoa, what are you doing right now?
What the hell are you doing right now?
And he keeps talking.
I go, Nate, he doesn't look that stupid.
He won rounds against the best box of all time.
And then Nate's like, he didn't win rounds.
He gave him one round.
I'm like, alright man, either way.
So he won rounds though.
What are you doing?
And he just keeps talking shit.
And then he starts talking about my career.
And I'm like, what is going on right now?
I go, Nate.
joe rogan
Who's mad at you?
brendan schaub
I went, Nate, I have no issues with you.
You're pointing your gun at the wrong guy.
What are you doing right now?
You should be selling this fight against Conor, not me.
I'm not the guy.
I said, I'm in skinny jeans and Gucci boots, for God's sake.
What are you doing right now?
You know what I'm saying?
And then Showtime was like, come on, let's go, boys.
I'm like, Jesus Christ, man.
I keep going.
I was just embarrassed by the situation.
Because he kept doing this.
This is the part I left out.
This is what triggered him.
He was talking.
I literally couldn't hear him, because people were like, Shob, let's go, because they didn't want a fight.
So I'm like, Shob, let's go.
And he keeps talking, and I'm like, Nate, use your words.
I can't understand a word you're saying.
Use your words.
And he probably has that lisp or whatever that probably set him off.
But I have no issues with Nate.
unidentified
There's nothing there.
joe rogan
So that's when it got ugly?
brendan schaub
Yeah, then he kept talking shit and I was like, what are you gonna do?
What are we doing here?
And he kept doing this.
I'm like, what the fuck is happening?
I was so embarrassed because the Showtime guy's like, oh my god, who is that guy?
I'm like, that's the guy who's supposed to fight Conor next.
They fought before.
What's wrong with him?
What's wrong with him?
I'm like, it's just...
I was so embarrassed, man.
joe rogan
I'm like, oh god.
brendan schaub
I have no issues with him.
joe rogan
Do you think that Conor wants that fight?
brendan schaub
I do.
joe rogan
You think that's a good money fight?
brendan schaub
I think it's their only fight.
I think it's the true winner, because those fights at 70 are toss-up.
One and one is whatever.
Neither one should be fighting at 70. At 55, a trilogy fight makes sense for the belt.
It'd be the biggest pay-per-view of all time.
I think it's the only fight that makes sense.
You can't do Khabib.
Tony and Kevin Lee, there's just not big enough stars to get Conor to come out.
joe rogan
You can't do Khabib because Khabib hasn't made the weight.
brendan schaub
True, and he's not ready to fight.
I don't understand that.
So how can you sell Khabib right now?
So let's say, just in a perfect world, you want to do Khabib vs.
Conor, and you go on this world tour trying to build Khabib up.
You go to Russia, you go all over.
Conor wants to fight him in Russia.
Crazy.
How do we know he's going to make weight and doesn't pull out?
So he's out of the equation right now.
He needs to come back, fight someone else.
joe rogan
He needs to get his body sorted out.
brendan schaub
He needs to figure some shit out.
joe rogan
Luke Rockhold was saying that his liver shut down.
I read it in an interview.
I apologize.
I didn't hear him say it.
I read it in an interview.
He said that his liver shut down when he was cutting weight for the Michael Johnson fight.
And then the next fight after that, he didn't make weight.
His body shut down for the Ferguson fight, and they canceled the fight.
brendan schaub
I'll tell you what, though.
Khabib's not even in the conversation for me anymore.
Until he gets his shit together, I'm not even entertaining the idea of him fighting.
joe rogan
He looks thick, too, when you look at him.
unidentified
I like Kevin Lee.
brendan schaub
I like Kevin Lee.
He's a bad motherfucker.
He's a bad dude.
But the thing is, he speaks well.
He looks the part.
joe rogan
Talks a lot of shit.
brendan schaub
He's great.
He dresses well.
He has all the makings of your next superstar.
joe rogan
Yeah, and he realizes now, especially in the Conor McGregor era, you gotta talk a lot of shit.
brendan schaub
Yeah, even Floyd's at a best.
Like, you just can't win fights.
You gotta sell yourself.
joe rogan
Listen, Kevin Lee is only, I think, 25?
brendan schaub
He's young.
25 or 24?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Find out.
He's 24 or 25. Super young, right?
Now, remember how brash Conor was when he first got to the UFC? Very similar.
He's like 26, I believe.
Okay, so he's 24. September 4th, he's almost 25. He'll be 25 in a couple of days.
He's super talented, looks better every time you see him.
So he's essentially like somewhere around Conor's age, when Conor, he's like a year younger than Conor, when Conor first burst on the scene.
And Conor was nobody back then.
Nobody knew who he was.
I'd seen him on the internet and from fights in England, and I knew he was really talented.
I actually went back and forth with him with some tweets before he got to the UFC. So there's a few people who knew about him, but it was nothing like what you see now.
Nothing, right?
Kevin Lee down the road is a 155 pounder who talks a lot of shit.
He's a bad motherfucker.
brendan schaub
Looks great.
joe rogan
He looks great.
brendan schaub
Speaks well.
joe rogan
Built like a brick shithouse.
brendan schaub
Speaks well.
joe rogan
Speaks well.
brendan schaub
African American.
joe rogan
Dresses well.
Check, check, check, check, all the boxes.
And he can fucking fight.
brendan schaub
That's the biggest thing.
joe rogan
That fight with Conor McGregor down the road, ooh.
brendan schaub
You need more time by here.
joe rogan
Right.
brendan schaub
Down the road.
This is my thing for Conor.
But he could do it.
100%.
To me, Kevin Lee's your next big thing.
However, Kevin Lee versus Tony Ferguson's a ton.
joe rogan
Oh, fight.
brendan schaub
Tony's so goddamn good.
It's a great fight.
joe rogan
And here's another one.
Tony Ferguson down the road.
Tony Ferguson can talk some shit, too.
Tony Ferguson is very smooth.
Tony Ferguson is very confident.
And he's also a weirdo.
brendan schaub
He's weird.
He has that weird vibe.
You get that weird vibe.
Phenomenal fighter.
unidentified
He's so intense.
joe rogan
He's so intense, but he does a lot of wing chong and shit, and he does all these weird moves where he's flowing on the ground and rolling around.
He does a lot of weird shit, but his endurance is off the charts.
He cuts a shitload of weight and does it like a professional.
brendan schaub
Mexican descent.
You can capitalize on that.
joe rogan
And he wins by knockout, and he also wins by submission.
unidentified
He's exciting as shit.
joe rogan
Very exciting.
brendan schaub
Look at the guys he's beat, too.
unidentified
Very exciting.
brendan schaub
It's a tough test for Kevin.
joe rogan
It's a very tough test.
It's a very good fight.
brendan schaub
To me, as far as like...
Potential like superstardom.
joe rogan
Those are the guys.
brendan schaub
Kevin Lee is the that's the guy right now I think.
joe rogan
Yeah, maybe but if Tony Ferguson becomes the interim champion and starts talking all kinds of crazy shit his star will rise man.
brendan schaub
Don't get me wrong.
There's a difference between rising and then becoming like a straight-up superstar like a transcendent like Conor McGregor, Ronda Rousey like there's a certain there's a certain thing.
joe rogan
So what makes Canelo?
Because he's not really charismatic and he only speaks Spanish.
So with the Mexicans, it collects.
brendan schaub
Just Mexicans he collects.
joe rogan
And also, Mexico has sort of a built-in boxing base.
brendan schaub
If you're the king of boxing and you're Mexican, you already have...
Giant base.
I'm actually, here you go.
joe rogan
You don't even have to talk.
brendan schaub
No, you're good.
He barely talks.
He's not entertaining at all.
He's an entertaining fighter.
joe rogan
Maybe for Mexicans.
brendan schaub
He's all right.
joe rogan
We don't know what the fuck he's saying.
brendan schaub
No, he's from the same hometown as my girl.
She's like, no, he's not.
To interview him, it's whatever.
joe rogan
But Gennady Golovkin, who's equally impressive, if not more impressive than Canelo, he's undefeated.
He mercs everybody.
brendan schaub
Everybody.
joe rogan
He's a goddamn murderous body puncher.
And, you know, he can sell like 150 pay-per-views.
brendan schaub
150, 200 max?
joe rogan
That's crazy.
brendan schaub
He doesn't have the star quality.
joe rogan
150,000 pay-per-views for one of the very best boxers on the planet Earth.
brendan schaub
If not the best.
joe rogan
Undefeated.
brendan schaub
How about $175,000 for Andre Ward?
joe rogan
Crazy.
Well, $125,000 for the rematch.
brendan schaub
Crazy, man.
joe rogan
That's even crazier.
brendan schaub
It's nuts.
joe rogan
I don't even think it was $170,000.
I think we looked at it.
I think we found out it was like $167,000.
brendan schaub
It's a real bummer.
joe rogan
$167,000 and like $125,000 or something like that.
brendan schaub
But again, to become like a straight-up household superstar, it takes more than just being this badass fighter.
joe rogan
And Andre Ward.
brendan schaub
You have to have everything.
joe rogan
Andre Ward is like, he's articulate.
He's admirable.
He seems like he's got a great control of his ego.
He's smart.
brendan schaub
He learns better.
He comes from a rough background.
He's a great story.
He's been with the same trainer since he was 12. Yeah.
He's never lost.
Olympic gold medalist.
Yeah.
joe rogan
He lost.
brendan schaub
There's something about him.
joe rogan
He lost that Kovalev fight.
brendan schaub
Yeah, right?
He lost that Kovalev fight.
I don't know what is.
joe rogan
I thought he lost the Kovalev fight, but I thought it was close.
But the second fight, he fucked Kovalev up.
That's what's important.
That's what's important because that was a big turnaround.
brendan schaub
How about Deontay Wilder?
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
He's our American-born heavyweight champion.
He could come in right now with two pizzas and we'd be like, what's up, bro?
No one would stop him outside.
joe rogan
No one knows who he is.
unidentified
It's crazy.
joe rogan
It is crazy.
brendan schaub
And he's supposed to fight Ortiz, I think.
That's a dangerous fight.
I don't like that fight for him.
joe rogan
Ortiz is a bad motherfucker.
brendan schaub
And then Anthony Joshua is supposed to fight that Russian fella.
And then I think the winner of those two fight...
I forget his name.
It's a tough fight for Joshua.
We should win it.
But frickin' Wilder has a tough fight on his hands.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Super tough fight.
That Ortiz is...
joe rogan
He's very good.
He's a southpaw, too.
brendan schaub
Southpaw.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
They call him King Kong.
joe rogan
Yeah.
He's a beast.
brendan schaub
I know.
I don't like that fight for him.
But neither one of those...
Joshua's a big star.
Looks the part.
Speaks well.
Knockout artist.
Had that great fight with Klitschko.
So he kind of has that, but those other guys, there's just nothing in motion.
joe rogan
Joshua will be that way.
He'll be giant for the UK, especially if he defends the title a few times.
brendan schaub
He's huge.
joe rogan
Giant, giant.
brendan schaub
Huge, huge.
joe rogan
Bigger and bigger with every fight.
He's got superstar status possibilities.
unidentified
Agreed.
joe rogan
Super articulate, very reserved and intelligent.
brendan schaub
In the UFC, though.
With Jon Jones out, he's really your only next superstar, and he's a notch down from Conor.
Like, there's Conor, Brock Lesnar, Ronda, they're here.
Conor's even above them.
And then there's your second tier superstar, and then you got Jon Jones.
joe rogan
But Jon Jones, with this, becomes the number one fuck-up of all time, for sure.
brendan schaub
Hands down.
joe rogan
If he wasn't already, this is the biggest one ever.
brendan schaub
No, he's consistent at beating the shit out of people in the octagon.
Very consistent.
Inconsistent at fucking up.
joe rogan
Now, we can only hope and pray that somehow or another there's some mistake.
brendan schaub
How many times are we going to go over this?
joe rogan
Yeah, you're right.
brendan schaub
You know what I'm saying?
Like, dude, you're breaking our heart, man.
joe rogan
He's so goddamn good.
You watch that fight with Daniel Cormier and you're like, Jesus Christ, he's so good.
brendan schaub
He's so good.
But do we take the PDs into account now?
Like, how do we know what real Jon Jono are we getting?
Because the one we saw was the OSP one and it looked like shit.
And then is DC the best of all time now?
Because he's beat everybody, including heavyweights, but he lost to Jon Jones.
But wait, Jon Jones was taking PEDs.
It's just a hot mess.
It is a hot mess, man.
Meanwhile, Ozdemir's like, fucking bring it, bro.
joe rogan
Ozdemir's murking people.
brendan schaub
Ozdemir's like, fucking bring it, bro.
joe rogan
Boy, that guy's got bricks for hands, too.
Let me tell you something, man.
When I shook his hand after the fight, I was like, oh, okay.
You know how some dudes, you just shake their hand, you're like, oh, I get it.
He's got giant hands, dude.
Bricks.
They feel like bricks.
brendan schaub
I think you do.
joe rogan
That dude puts hands on people.
He fucks people up.
brendan schaub
See, I think you do.
Let's say John's out, right?
Long story.
Four years.
Suspension.
unidentified
Out.
brendan schaub
All right.
Broke my heart.
See ya.
Go to Japan.
Juice to the gills and fuck all the whores you want.
Do whatever you want.
unidentified
Whoa!
brendan schaub
Right?
I'm out.
I'm over it.
I'm mad at him.
So then you have Ozdemir versus Gustin to fight DC. 100%.
joe rogan
It's a great fight.
brendan schaub
Right?
It's a fun fight.
joe rogan
Very interesting fight.
Gustafson is so veteran.
He's so good.
brendan schaub
It's Gustafson's time.
joe rogan
Gustafson coming off of that Glover fight.
I almost want to see Ozdemir fight more people.
Because the Jimmy Manilow fight was crazy.
He just grabbed ahold of Jimmy Manilow, clipped him with that left hook inside the clinch.
brendan schaub
But that's all there is, though, Joe.
Like, hey, bring up 205. Like, you look at it, you're like, oh my god.
There's no one left.
joe rogan
It's dinosaurs.
Especially now that Rumble's out.
And Rumble was his stablemate, anyway.
The word was that he was the guy that was sparring with Rumble all the time.
brendan schaub
Oh, really?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Yeah.
That he was one of the few guys that was willing to spar with Rumble.
brendan schaub
He's a monster.
joe rogan
He's a bad motherfucker.
No time.
He's got the worst nickname of all time.
brendan schaub
No time.
joe rogan
Ozdemir.
What's the best nickname of all time?
brendan schaub
The best?
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
El Cucuy's pretty goddamn good.
brendan schaub
That's pretty badass.
joe rogan
That's pretty good.
brendan schaub
What's Kevin Lee?
Is it a Detroit superstar?
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
That's fucking sick.
And you're from Detroit?
joe rogan
That's a good name.
brendan schaub
Pretty sick.
Oh, what was Crunkshall?
Crunkshank?
He's a porno star too, isn't he?
joe rogan
Wasn't he Detroit Superstar?
brendan schaub
It's Kevin Lee's.
Do they share the same nickname?
Because I can't have that.
joe rogan
That's rude.
brendan schaub
That's fucking rude.
joe rogan
Motown Phenom, Kevin Lee.
brendan schaub
Motown.
Motown Phenom.
That's fucking...
Oh, the axe murder's not bad.
joe rogan
That's the best.
brendan schaub
Hard to mark it, though.
joe rogan
Yeah, Darren Crookshank is Detroit 2 star.
brendan schaub
See, that's my favorite.
joe rogan
And Kevin Lee is Motown Phenom.
brendan schaub
Oh, Motown Phenom's brilliant, too.
Axe Murder, this day and age, hard to market.
joe rogan
Axe Murder's the best.
brendan schaub
The Natural?
joe rogan
That's pretty good, but the testing back then was not enough to substantiate these claims.
brendan schaub
I agree.
I agree.
The Ex-Murder's just tough to sell to companies these days.
joe rogan
The Prodigy's pretty goddamn good.
unidentified
When BJ was at his best, pretty goddamn good.
joe rogan
Yeah.
The Phenom when Vitor was merking people.
brendan schaub
Who's the best right now, though?
El Kikui, you think?
joe rogan
El Kikui.
Yeah, I think so.
It's a goddamn supernatural boogeyman.
brendan schaub
God, no heavyweights really have nicknames.
I was trying to think of the heavyweights.
Not really.
Just Cain Velasquez.
Steep, eh?
joe rogan
But El Kikui...
Didn't he call himself...
What's that Russian name?
Sexyama.
Sexyama.
That was ridiculous.
But that nickname, people...
Like, he didn't use it.
brendan schaub
Other people did.
joe rogan
Uncle Creepy.
The Mexicution is pretty goddamn good.
brendan schaub
These are old.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Axmer number five?
How dare you?
joe rogan
Kimbo Slice, get the fuck out of here.
That's his nickname.
It's not like his, the natural.
What's number one?
unidentified
That was the Sexy Mama was number one.
brendan schaub
Sexy Yama?
joe rogan
Sexy Mama, he says.
unidentified
Sexy Mama.
joe rogan
Yeah, if a girl fights with that.
brendan schaub
Sexy mama.
joe rogan
The karate hottie's not a bad.
That's not a bad date, man.
brendan schaub
There's nothing great sticking out there.
joe rogan
And Cyborg's not bad, but her husband's name is Cyborg, too.
brendan schaub
I feel like there's a lot of Cyborgs out there.
joe rogan
You can't double Cyborg.
Well, the Cyborg Grappler, the guy that you went with, Yeah, there's a cyborg and silvas.
Ricardo Abreu.
brendan schaub
In Brazil, cyborgs and silvas are like Joes and Bills here.
You know what I'm saying?
joe rogan
Yeah, there's a bunch of cyborgs, right?
There's other cyborgs.
I'm trying to think of other ones.
There's one other guy that I know that called himself Cyborg.
It was a jiu-jitsu guy, I think.
brendan schaub
Does anyone ever call you Joey?
Never.
joe rogan
No, not really, no.
But also, I'm friends with Diaz, and everybody calls him Joey.
It's always been Joey.
That's a good point.
But his name is Jose.
brendan schaub
Really?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Joey Diaz, his name is Jose Diaz.
brendan schaub
Oh, well, alright.
joe rogan
But we've always called him Joey.
brendan schaub
Yeah, that makes sense.
You wouldn't call, well, Jose Joe.
You could.
joe rogan
Yeah, you can, for sure.
But I think growing up, everybody called him Joey.
brendan schaub
Did you have a nickname as a kid?
joe rogan
No.
brendan schaub
No nickname?
joe rogan
No.
brendan schaub
Just straight up Joe?
joe rogan
Yeah, I never really had a nickname.
brendan schaub
Nothing!
joe rogan
Dude, when I used to play pool, pool halls are the place where everybody gets a nickname.
There's so many crazy nicknames, people.
A lot of times the nickname was like where you come from, like White Plains Charlie or Mount Vernon Tommy.
There was a lot of that.
My nickname was Joe the Comedian.
So lame.
brendan schaub
Real creative, guys.
joe rogan
It was so lame.
I was Joe the Comedian.
brendan schaub
But you're the funny guy in the pool hall.
joe rogan
Well, they knew I was a professional comedian.
They would come and play pool.
So it was like Ray the Fireman.
No, no, no.
I was like 20...
When I first started playing pool, it was right after I tore my ACL. So I think I was 23. So like, hey, it's Bob the UPS driver.
Yes.
brendan schaub
Real original, fellas.
joe rogan
Ray the Fireman.
brendan schaub
God damn it, guys.
joe rogan
White Plains Charlie was a big one.
This is, like, crazy little semi-homeless guy used to come and play pool all the time.
He was an addicted gambler.
unidentified
Addicted.
joe rogan
So many guys.
I realized about gambling addicts when I played pool.
I just did not know how many of them there were because I'd never been around them.
I'd never been...
See, like, until I started playing pool, I didn't...
Go places like a nightclub type environment or like a place where a bunch of seedy people would hang out.
Pool halls are seedy.
Like a lot of gambling and shit talking and people betting on things.
I didn't grow up around that.
My high school years was all taekwondo.
And then after that it was all martial arts competition and then all of a sudden I'm around these complete degenerates.
Like I've never been around them and I'm 23. Which is a good life lesson though.
It was interesting.
There was a lot of people that are addicted to drugs.
There was a lot of methadone people that would come during the day, and they would just be like half out of it, and they would play pool, and they were terrible.
brendan schaub
Just hustling for their money?
joe rogan
No, they weren't hustling.
They would just play pool with each other.
They would call them the methadoneans, and they would come in and play pool, and they would just bang balls around.
They couldn't concentrate.
brendan schaub
Just bang balls around.
joe rogan
For real, they could not concentrate.
brendan schaub
No shit.
joe rogan
But it's funny because, like, what it was like was there were, like, a bunch of people that were under a spell.
They would come in, they'd be just like...
And they would play pool, but they were dull.
They were, like, gray people.
brendan schaub
They were just passing time.
joe rogan
There was no vibrant color.
brendan schaub
They were gray.
Yeah, they were zombies.
joe rogan
But the crazy thing is, though, there was a guy who was the best player I ever saw, or one of the best players I ever saw, and he was a heroin addict.
And he would do heroin, and he would go into the bathroom, he would shoot up, and he would come out, and he would sit down on one of those bar stools, one of those pool stools, you know, kind of elevated with a thing for your drink.
He would sit there on this, like this, for a fucking half an hour, and everybody knew what was going on.
He had to do this.
He'd just sit there like this.
brendan schaub
Just high as shit.
joe rogan
Just so fucked up.
And I'd never been around anybody who was on heroin either.
brendan schaub
I've only seen it on the intervention.
joe rogan
They had to explain it to me.
My friend Johnny, who did a bunch of drugs, would explain to me.
He's like, he's going back there to do his shit.
I go, what shit does he do?
He's going to fucking shoot up.
He's going to go shoot up.
And he's going to come out.
And then he's going to sit down for a while.
And then after he sits down for a while, he's going to play.
brendan schaub
And then he busts that ass when he plays.
joe rogan
Dude, he would get up and he had no feet.
brendan schaub
He'd be like...
joe rogan
And the guy he was playing, this guy George the Greek...
brendan schaub
George the Greek.
joe rogan
Yeah, George the Greek was one of the local big-time guys, and he was a wealthy guy.
He was always gambling.
He'd gamble high.
You know, he would say, like, crazy shit, like, you got the heart of a mustard seed, you cocksucker.
And a raspy guy, always smoking cigarettes.
You could smoke cigarettes indoor back then.
brendan schaub
Everybody smoked.
joe rogan
The entire place filled with smoke.
And he was gambling against this guy.
And he had like some crazy spot because this guy was like literally a world-class pool player.
And this fucking guy didn't miss a ball.
And he's like, he shoots the fucking nerves off.
He goes into that bathroom and he shoots that shit.
And he shoots his fucking nerves off.
He comes out of here, he can't miss a ball.
brendan schaub
The real Iceman.
joe rogan
He was so dead behind the eyes.
You'd look at his eyes and they were black like a gerbil's.
brendan schaub
Like a shark?
joe rogan
Yeah, like a shark eyes.
He was just gone.
brendan schaub
Gerbil's eyes are black as fuck.
Black as fuck.
joe rogan
Dude, that's what he was like.
I'm telling you.
It was the weirdest thing around him.
He would look right through you.
He didn't see you.
He was just blitzkrieged on heroin.
brendan schaub
It's not living.
joe rogan
He couldn't miss.
Couldn't miss.
Made me want to do heroin.
brendan schaub
He's probably dead now, though, huh?
joe rogan
Oh, he's dead.
I know he's dead.
unidentified
Okay.
joe rogan
100%.
I ran into him at a pool tournament when I first moved to LA in 1994, and this guy tried to get me to drive him to Compton so he could cop.
Jesus Christ.
He asked me to put him in the pool tournament.
There's a pool tournament at Oh, goddammit.
unidentified
What's it called?
joe rogan
Hard Times.
Hard Times Billiards in Bellflower.
It's one of the biggest pool halls in the world.
Hard Times is like a world-famous pool hall, and it's in Bellflower, California.
And a lot of big-time gamblers and top-level players used to play there all the time and even came out of there, like Keith McCready.
It was like the guy from The Color of Money.
He was the nemesis of Tom Cruise.
Legitimately one of the best pool players in the world at the time.
He came out of there.
So this is a huge pool hall, like one of the biggest pro-level pool halls in the world.
And I get there, and I see this guy.
They call him Buffalo Bill or Water Dog.
Those are his two nicknames.
brendan schaub
I like Water Dog.
joe rogan
Depending upon which part of the country and what time of the year.
brendan schaub
Water Dog's cool.
joe rogan
So I ran into him, and I'm like, are you playing?
What are you doing out here?
And he was like, yeah, I just need to get someone to put me in the tournament.
I'll say, I'll put you in the tournament.
Like, it was like, I don't know, 20 bucks or something like that.
He didn't even have 20 bucks.
brendan schaub
He just needed you to front him $20.
joe rogan
Just to get him in the tournament.
Whatever.
I don't remember how much it cost.
Might have been 50 bucks.
Whatever it was.
I was like, I'll put you in.
He had a legit chance to win.
Like, he was a world-class player.
unidentified
He's like, okay, but I gotta go to Compton so I can comp.
joe rogan
And I was like, what?
And he's like, you gotta drive me to Compton.
I'm like, I'm not driving you to Compton so you can buy heroin.
brendan schaub
Hell no.
joe rogan
Because if they arrest you, they take your car.
Like, if I was with him...
brendan schaub
You're part of the transaction, right?
joe rogan
Oh, yeah, they confiscate your car.
I was like, I had a 1994 Toyota Supra, bitch.
brendan schaub
Oh, bitch, you crazy.
joe rogan
Supra Turbo, the car with a big, crazy, stupid wing in the back.
brendan schaub
Oh, what color?
Is it the purple?
unidentified
Silver?
Silver.
brendan schaub
I love the purple one.
joe rogan
I always wanted a spaceship, bro.
My cars were almost all silver.
brendan schaub
I hear you.
Damn, that's sick.
Drive that thing to Compton?
You know what the homies would do to that thing?
joe rogan
The first nice car I ever had, ever.
You know, I was like, at the time, probably 27, ballin' for the first time in my life.
brendan schaub
Hell yeah.
joe rogan
I'm like, what?
brendan schaub
Should've Postmates that shit if it's today.
unidentified
I was like, what?
joe rogan
I have a condo.
I rent a condo right now, motherfucker.
I'm not giving all this up.
I was like so excited.
brendan schaub
Was he all sad?
joe rogan
Oh yeah, super sad.
Super sad face.
brendan schaub
Super sad.
joe rogan
And he went out there and he lost two matches in a row, like barely paid attention.
I put him in the tournament anyway.
He asked me to put him in anyway.
brendan schaub
Now he needs his drugs, man.
joe rogan
Without heroin, he could not play.
But he was so itchy, I think.
I think those guys that get off of that stuff, cold turkey, like if you're jonesing for it.
brendan schaub
Bro, you put him in a tournament with withdrawals?
It's fucked up.
joe rogan
I don't know if it was even withdrawals.
He probably got high earlier that day.
He was just jonesing.
I don't think he was full of withdrawing.
Cause he seemed pretty, you know, I think when they get withdrawing, is that a word?
Withdrawing?
brendan schaub
Withdrawals.
joe rogan
They start sweating and shit and they shake.
brendan schaub
Get clammy.
joe rogan
It's like they have the fever.
Like they have the flu.
brendan schaub
I tried going off coffee for a day and I got withdrawals.
joe rogan
I got headaches.
brendan schaub
I was like sweating, clammy skin, shaking on the ground.
joe rogan
I'm 100% addicted to caffeine.
brendan schaub
Me too.
joe rogan
100%.
brendan schaub
I'm not mad at it though.
joe rogan
I love caffeine.
brendan schaub
I like life with caffeine.
joe rogan
I like coffee.
I like the ritual.
I get up in the morning.
I drink some coffee.
I'll do a little reading.
I do a little writing sometimes.
I take a giant shit.
Then I work out.
unidentified
Standard.
brendan schaub
Yeah, me too.
Standard routine.
joe rogan
I used to work out right away, but I found out that it's better if I let my brain warm up a little bit.
brendan schaub
Just get tuned in.
Yeah, I'm a little foggy.
When I wake up, I'm a little foggy.
I have my coffee, take my kid for a walk, and then I hit the gym.
joe rogan
Sometimes I like to look at the news, too, just to make sure the world's not fucking falling apart before I start my day.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I just like to be in the know, you know?
joe rogan
Yeah, I go to Google.
I have this, like, Google News thing set up on my phone, so I'll hit that without looking at social media, so I don't get looking at my own stuff.
I just go and read stuff about, like, what's happening in the world.
Everything okay?
We're going to war with Korea.
We're good.
brendan schaub
Like to check off.
joe rogan
Some weird shit happening?
Some fire I need to know about?
Dude, I... Fire season right now, buddy.
brendan schaub
Phew.
Dude, it's rare.
joe rogan
180 degrees outside right now.
brendan schaub
It is fucking toast.
I'm sweating in here.
unidentified
It's insane.
brendan schaub
I feel bad for my car.
joe rogan
Dude, it's insane.
brendan schaub
I feel bad for my car.
It's so hot outside.
joe rogan
This is how hot it is outside.
When I came to the door to unlock to get in, the air conditioning from our studio was blowing out.
I could feel it on my hand.
brendan schaub
Why the fuck is it so hot?
joe rogan
It's crazy.
brendan schaub
It's ridiculous.
joe rogan
The world's ending, bro.
brendan schaub
The world is ending.
joe rogan
Satan's coming.
brendan schaub
Houston is in central.
joe rogan
We're living in Arizona now.
brendan schaub
It's so fucking hot.
joe rogan
Is it going to keep getting worse?
At what point does it become uninhabitable?
brendan schaub
Yesterday my girl's dad was at the house and he just goes, Brendan, it's only going to get worse.
joe rogan
The heat?
brendan schaub
Just the world.
Everything.
joe rogan
Is that true?
brendan schaub
I disagree.
joe rogan
It's better than ever.
brendan schaub
I disagree.
I'm like, I know things look rough right now, but if you look for bad things, you're going to find bad things.
joe rogan
Here's what odd things can be.
brendan schaub
What were you going to say, Jamie?
jamie vernon
Whenever you see a high temperature like today, and we don't beat the record high, whatever that was, I always think about what the fuck was going on in 1927 when it was 170 and no one had air conditioning or anything.
brendan schaub
And girls had bushes, like fucking trees.
joe rogan
Swamp pussy.
brendan schaub
And dudes just look like shit and more.
You have to wear three-piece suits and hats like an asshole.
joe rogan
Imagine what boxes smell like.
brendan schaub
Remember George Washington days?
They had those fucking wigs.
joe rogan
Oh, yeah.
Those powdered wigs.
brendan schaub
Yes.
joe rogan
That would go into the courtroom with a powdered wig on with no air conditioning.
brendan schaub
No AC. That stupid wig.
The full get-up.
joe rogan
What is a powdered wig?
Like, what does that mean?
Do they put powder on the wig?
What is a powdered wig?
unidentified
They're all white?
I think so.
I think probably, yeah.
brendan schaub
Why'd they wear that shit?
joe rogan
They powder them white?
Yeah, why do they have powdered wigs?
Like, Google that.
That's a crazy, like, crazy tradition.
brendan schaub
Yeah, who was like, yeah, that looks tight, bro.
joe rogan
Well, they still wear them, bro, in England.
unidentified
No.
joe rogan
Not only do they wear them, they wear them super obvious, where, like, you can see their hair underneath.
brendan schaub
Hey, put a little effort into it, bud.
joe rogan
The powder made them white.
Oh.
Okay.
In the 18th century, men's wigs were powdered to give them their distinctive white or off-white color.
Women in the 18th century did not wear wigs, but wore...
How do you say that word?
Coffure?
Coffure?
Supplemented by artificial hair or hair from...
Oh, they had a weave.
After 1790, English women seldom powdered their hair.
Why do people wear powdered wigs?
Click on that, mental floss.
brendan schaub
Yeah, why the fuck would they do it?
joe rogan
Why did they?
brendan schaub
What is that?
joe rogan
Perukes.
Powdered wigs called perukes were all the rage.
Look at that fucking wig!
They would wear the goofiest wigs.
They were like 1970s rockers.
How weird.
Sentries, powdered wigs called perukes were all the rage.
The chic...
How do you say that?
Chick.
It's chic, right?
Hairpiece, because I always hear chic.
I don't really read it that often.
Chic hairpiece would never become popular, however, if it hadn't been for a venereal disease...
A pair of self-conscious kings and poor hair hygiene.
Well, the Peruk story begins, like many others, with syphilis.
brendan schaub
Standard.
joe rogan
1580, the STD had become the worst epidemic to strike Europe since the Black Death.
Oh my God.
These people were all fucking each other to death.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
According to William...
How do you say that name?
Klaus?
an infinite multitude of syphilis patients clogged London's hospitals and more filtered in each day.
Without antibiotics, victims faced the full brunt of the disease.
Open sores, nasty rashes, blindness, dementia, and patchy hair loss.
Baldness swept the land.
brendan schaub
Whoa.
So they started rocking these things.
joe rogan
At the time, hair loss was a one-way ticket to public embarrassment.
Long hair was a trendy status symbol and a bald dome could stain any reputation because they knew you had syphilis.
Oh my god.
When Samuel Pepe's brother acquired syphilis, the diarist, what is that word?
Diarist?
He writes diaries for a living?
Is that what he does?
Or is he in the dairy business?
unidentified
I got the first one.
joe rogan
Well, we'll Google it after we read this.
unidentified
Okay.
joe rogan
The diarist wrote, If my brother lives, he will not be able to show his head, which will be a very great shame to me.
Wow.
Hair was that big of a deal.
brendan schaub
What did they do back then?
joe rogan
Well, yeah, that's true.
In the Bible, you know, God sent some bears to kill some kids because they made fun of this dude for being bald.
That was part of the Bible.
brendan schaub
Some dark shit.
joe rogan
So, Louis XIV hired 48 wig makers to save his image.
Five years later, Louis XIV was only 17 when his mops started thinning.
brendan schaub
God, terrible genetics.
joe rogan
Yeah, not good.
Louis's cousin, Charles II, did the same thing when his hair started going to gray.
Both men likely had syphilis.
Genetics.
Courtiers?
I don't know what that word is.
And other aristocrats immediately copied the two kings.
Ah, interesting.
They sported wigs and the style trickled down to the upper middle class.
Europe's newest fad was born.
The cost of wigs increased and perukes became a scheme for flaunting wealth.
An everyday wig cost about 25 shillings a week pay.
Wow.
For a common Londoner.
So a couple grand for this fucking wig.
The bill for large, elaborate perooks ballooned to as high as 800 shillings.
Whoa!
The word bigwig was coined to describe snobs who could afford big, puffy perooks.
brendan schaub
Still use that word.
Wow!
unidentified
Poofy.
brendan schaub
He's a big wig.
joe rogan
That's crazy.
That was from the 1700s.
When Lewis and Charles died, wigs stayed around.
brendan schaub
It's like some story time with Rogan.
joe rogan
This is crazy.
Perukes remained popular because they were so practical.
They were so practical.
That's what I say about wigs.
They're so practical.
brendan schaub
It just makes sense.
joe rogan
It's just a thing to do.
At the time, head lice.
Oh, wow.
Head lice were everywhere.
And nitpicking was painful and time-consuming.
Wigs, however, curbed the problem.
Lice stopped infesting people's hair, which had to be shaved for the peruke to fit.
So everybody shaved their head and wore a wig.
brendan schaub
Lice had no home.
joe rogan
They camped out on the wigs instead.
Delousing a wig was much easier than delousing a head of hair.
You send the dirty hair piece to a wig maker who would boil the wig and remove the nits.
That's where nitpicking came from.
The term nitpicking came from picking lice out of wigs.
brendan schaub
You were dropping some knowledge.
joe rogan
Damn!
This is just like when Callum does that segment on your show.
Dropping knowledge.
First of all, you've got to rename that.
brendan schaub
But you didn't make it up.
unidentified
Immediately.
joe rogan
You've got to rename that immediately.
You cannot say dropping knowledge.
You just can't.
brendan schaub
You need to call him up.
joe rogan
We should call him up right now.
Hey, Brian.
brendan schaub
Hey, Brian.
We've been talking.
There's no more dropping knowledge.
joe rogan
It's wonderful that you're sharing these little tidbits of information, but to announce that they're going to be there in a segment and say, we're going to drop knowledge now, and then Hunter Matz pops up out of the ground like a fucking jack-in-the-box.
brendan schaub
Or he just regurgitates what Hunter said.
He's like, what's up?
No, I have to do it.
joe rogan
You can't drop knowledge.
brendan schaub
Dude, I have to do it so listeners, if they don't like that, to fast forward.
Otherwise, they'll just spring it on you.
So it's kind of like, you know, it's almost like an ad read.
So if you dig it, cool, here it comes.
joe rogan
Is this his idea or yours?
brendan schaub
It's mine, because I was getting sick of getting dropped knowledge on.
It was mine.
unidentified
Interesting.
joe rogan
So you told him to start it off as a segment?
brendan schaub
No, no, no.
joe rogan
Some of them are really funny, right?
brendan schaub
Some are fun, yeah.
Sometimes.
joe rogan
Is it a problem that you used to do it in every episode?
unidentified
Is that what it is?
brendan schaub
Yeah, so we'd be in the middle of talking about wigs and be like, you know, in France in 1940. And then we'd go off on this thing and kind of derail the show.
joe rogan
Sometimes that's interesting, though.
If he told you that, he'd be like, what?
brendan schaub
That'd be great, but he sprinkles in some stuff where people are like, that's not true, man.
joe rogan
Oh, it's not true stuff?
Yeah.
What's the not true stuff?
brendan schaub
You know, it just depends on the episode.
joe rogan
Interesting.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it just depends.
So I figured I might as well just label it so fans know what's happening right now.
joe rogan
I'm not a fan of segments in anything.
When everybody goes, okay, now we're going to go to the let's pretend you're a Mexican game.
unidentified
I'm not...
joe rogan
I'm not a fan.
I'm not a fan of a thing that people do in the middle of a show.
brendan schaub
Well, I mean, for ours, we'll have our banter back and forth like we have.
Not for three hours, because we don't do it every day, but we'll do it...
You know, if you had the same person every single day, it's tough to come up with three hours of material.
joe rogan
Dude, you and I could do a podcast every day for three hours.
brendan schaub
Different animal, Joe.
You and I We're some professional podcasters here We're good at talking shit That's what we do What are you saying?
joe rogan
Cal is not?
How dare you?
brendan schaub
No, I'm not saying that.
joe rogan
That's what he's saying.
brendan schaub
No, I'm not saying that.
joe rogan
You know what he's saying?
brendan schaub
I'm not saying that.
We're into the same things.
You and I are into the same things.
Cal's into, you know...
joe rogan
But I'm in a lot of the same things that Callen's into, too.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I'm going down a weird road.
You know what?
joe rogan
Listen.
brendan schaub
Listen, bro.
Listen.
Callen's a fascinating man.
joe rogan
He is.
brendan schaub
But with the current events, it gives us...
You know why I started current events?
joe rogan
What?
brendan schaub
Callen doesn't keep up with current events.
He wouldn't know whatever today's current event was.
Something happened with pop culture.
He has no idea what's going on in the world, because he's so into history.
joe rogan
That's where Jamie comes in.
Exactly.
Especially if it's black Twitter.
brendan schaub
Yes.
joe rogan
He is just on the ball.
brendan schaub
So I'm kind of like, yeah, so exactly.
So the idea is like, Jamie introduced you to certain stuff.
Like with sports, like Cal doesn't see on stuff, you know, whatever the fuck he does.
So I'm like, man, you didn't know, you know, Bieber flashed his dick?
He's like, I have no idea.
joe rogan
Well, he's into books and stuff, which is admirable.
brendan schaub
But that's why the show works, is he's into his thing, I'm into my thing, and then we cross-pollinate.
joe rogan
Right.
Cross-pollinate.
brendan schaub
Cross-pollinate.
joe rogan
But is he, how much is Brian into like MMA these days?
brendan schaub
I don't know.
And that's one of the reasons why I started my own show, because I'd be like, hey, did you watch that fight?
We'd cover it.
And he'd be like, no, I didn't see it.
Or he'd just see the highlights.
And I'm like, dude, I'm getting balls deep into this.
joe rogan
Well, you kind of have to if you're the fighter and the kid, and you grow this giant MMA population of listeners.
brendan schaub
Yeah, but for whatever reason, maybe he's busy or something, he doesn't see the fights.
It's tough when...
And that's how my show started.
I'd be breaking down a fight, getting pretty intricate into it, and he'd go, so...
Beginner's question where I couldn't really get into it.
You know what I'm saying?
joe rogan
Oh, we gotta let these motherfuckers know this Saturday is January 2nd.
September 2nd.
unidentified
January.
joe rogan
Did I say January?
Yeah, you did.
Because I'm thinking of whose fight.
I'm sorry.
I'm triple tasking.
Podcasting, thinking, and going through my phone.
brendan schaub
And taxing.
joe rogan
No.
This Saturday, the second is UFC Fight Night.
It's Stefan Struve versus, who is it?
brendan schaub
Pull it up.
joe rogan
We're going to have a motherfucking fight companion.
That's the point, ladies and gentlemen.
brendan schaub
We're doing the companion?
joe rogan
But we are not going to do a companion for Edmonton.
Because I, that's, why do they still have Jermaine Durand and me on there?
brendan schaub
She's fighting.
joe rogan
She pulled out of the fight.
brendan schaub
Did she?
joe rogan
She got injured.
brendan schaub
She got injured again?
joe rogan
Yes.
She pulled out.
Unspecified reasons.
But it's speculated it's an injury.
brendan schaub
Speculate.
Hashtag still scared.
joe rogan
Hashtag maybe.
brendan schaub
Hashtag cyborgs gonna be attending.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Okay.
Gets replacement.
Late replacement for injured Jermaine Durandamy.
Talita de Oliveira has apparently agreed to step in on short notice.
Who is she?
Have you seen her fight before?
unidentified
No.
brendan schaub
Let me see the rest of the card, Jamie.
joe rogan
Yeah, let's go back to the card.
Alright, here we go.
What's the full card here?
Volkov.
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Volkov was the Bellator champ.
joe rogan
Yeah.
He was very good, too, man.
brendan schaub
And his last fight, he beat Roy Nelson.
joe rogan
It's kind of a light card.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
I'm just being honest.
brendan schaub
Yeah, light would be an understatement.
Yeah, I agree.
Light, light.
joe rogan
Ooh, but wait a minute.
Maribov Tysimov is fighting.
brendan schaub
And then you also got Kalibov.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Click on that Tysimov fight.
He's been out of the UFC for a while.
He's in the UFC Fight Pass prelims.
There you go right there.
Bam.
Yeah.
Felipe Silva.
Marebek Tysimov is a very good fighter.
He's very good.
That's gonna be an interesting fight.
I don't know too much about Felipe Silva.
But this is Rotterdam, right?
That's where this is taking place.
brendan schaub
That main event would be fun.
joe rogan
Is Calentown?
brendan schaub
I think so.
joe rogan
We gotta get Eddie Bravo drunk and bring up conspiracies.
Yes!
unidentified
Yes!
joe rogan
That never happens.
Oh, Barbarina is fighting.
brendan schaub
That's...
joe rogan
Who's he fighting?
Right next to that one.
That's Barbarina.
Brian Barbarina, Leon Edwards.
brendan schaub
Jamaica.
Bam Bam.
Yeah, you know, it's a light card, but I will watch it.
joe rogan
Barbarina's a tough motherfucker.
I like watching him fight.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
That should be interesting.
Yeah, it'll be fun.
brendan schaub
Speaking of Fight Pass, did you see your boy Snoop Dogg talking shit to Conor McGregor?
joe rogan
No.
brendan schaub
So embarrassing.
joe rogan
What did he do?
brendan schaub
Oh my god.
Can you bring that up, Jamie?
joe rogan
To his face?
brendan schaub
How the UFC doesn't go, get the fuck up.
unidentified
To his face?
brendan schaub
No, he put blasts out on the Instagram.
Fuck you, Conor.
That's what happens, you little bitch.
joe rogan
Oh, no.
Snoop Dogg trashes Conor McGregor in profane tirade.
Really?
Okay, let's hear this.
brendan schaub
One million views, by the way.
joe rogan
Powerful Snoop Dogg.
unidentified
15-0, nigga!
The motherfucking champ, nigga!
15-0!
Fuck that motherfucking punk-ass McGregor, you bitch!
Fuck him!
Motherfucking champ, nigga!
Yeah, nigga!
That's what you get for coming to a motherfucking gang fight with a butter knife, you bitch-ass motherfucker!
Fuck you, nigga!
Money team!
Champ, nigga!
Where the party at, Floyd?
brendan schaub
He's creative.
unidentified
Yeah!
Hi, honey!
Hey!
brendan schaub
I got one more rib for you!
unidentified
Oh no, fuck you!
joe rogan
Well, okay, what happened there?
Did he get schizophrenic?
brendan schaub
Is he bipolar?
joe rogan
He's a bad motherfucker.
unidentified
I think he got happy when they said they had one more rib left.
brendan schaub
Come on, man.
I just don't get when people celebrate the demise.
It's not even the demise.
The risk he took.
joe rogan
It was a fun fight.
It was a fun fight.
That was a fun fight.
brendan schaub
Conor brought the fight to Floyd and it made it a fight.
It was the biggest fight of all time.
joe rogan
Well, Floyd brought the fight to Conor.
I mean, Floyd stepped forward with his hands up and moved towards him and constantly created pressure.
brendan schaub
Conor also came forward, too, man.
They both brought it.
joe rogan
It was a very good fight.
It was very entertaining.
brendan schaub
Very entertaining.
joe rogan
He hit Floyd more than any fighter hit him.
And I think the right result took place.
A specialist, the greatest specialist of all time, beat a guy who is just not at his league when it comes to that specialty.
You know, I mean, I think that's what we should have seen.
And I think it was good for everybody.
I think it was great for Floyd because it was the most entertaining Floyd fight ever.
brendan schaub
I agree.
joe rogan
It was a great...
Opportunity for him to showcase his ability and to show everybody what he can do.
brendan schaub
And get the 50th win.
joe rogan
Get the 50th win.
And for Conor, he got to show people that he can hang, until he gets tired, he can hang pretty well with the best fighter of all time.
brendan schaub
This is what else I think is cool, is Conor's going to take those boxing skills and now bring it to the UFC. And he's been on...
There's no fight the UFC can throw to him that's going to be bigger.
There's just nothing.
You're not going to rattle him.
The moment can't get big enough for him.
So now, unless they give him John Jones, Brock Lesnar, like a tag team, some weird random shit, which would be awesome.
However, there's nothing they can do.
So now he learns from this, and he's a guy who learns from his losses, and brings that to the UFC. I think he maybe has one, maybe two left, but still.
joe rogan
You think so?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
I don't see him doing it.
I mean, when you have $100 million in the bank, he even said, he goes, unless I fuck things up, I should be set for life and my kids and their kids should be set for life.
And he's very self-conscious of the repercussions of sticking around too long.
He had a buddy.
He was a tenant fight.
A guy died.
So, you know, I don't see him.
This is the other thing.
With John being out...
Now all the chips are in Connor's corner.
He's the only superstar, legit superstar in town.
He's like, listen, you want me to fight again?
I know that's the old contract.
That's what I'm worth.
What do you guys want to do?
It's the only way it's going to happen.
joe rogan
Damn.
There is no second.
Who else is number two?
brendan schaub
Name a number two, Joe.
joe rogan
Honestly, it might be Stipe.
And that's not even...
I mean, he's the heavyweight champ.
I mean, at least there's something to it.
And it's not even close.
brendan schaub
They're not even the same realm.
joe rogan
They're not even the same side of the planet.
brendan schaub
I'm talking as far as the draw.
joe rogan
Yeah, who else is there?
Who?
Bisping?
Who?
George St. Pierre, once he fights Bisping?
If George wins?
brendan schaub
I think people are going to be a little disappointed with the George numbers.
I don't think he's going to be as strong as you think.
joe rogan
I think the people that were George St. Pierre fans, that's a long time ago.
brendan schaub
Over four years ago.
joe rogan
And the sport is a different sport now.
You're talking about a lot of younger people now that are just getting into it.
brendan schaub
Like, this old guy's fighting?
Cool, and he's fighting Bisping?
Doesn't really make sense.
What happened to the other guys?
joe rogan
I read this...
Douchey preview of the fight.
It was so douchey.
See, the thing about the UFC getting bigger, it's these fucking sports guys who write these really creatively negative articles.
And it was about the Bisping and George C. Pierre fight.
brendan schaub
Oh, I thought you were saying you had to read a promo for the fight.
joe rogan
No, no, no.
I read it online.
brendan schaub
Oh, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
joe rogan
No, no, no.
brendan schaub
Not me.
joe rogan
I don't read promos.
When you see those promos, there's nothing red.
brendan schaub
That's always from the top of the joint.
joe rogan
100%.
I don't have a plan.
I just say exactly what I think about the fights.
So when I do those...
brendan schaub
That's the best way to do it.
And I remember you telling me that.
So when Showtime wanted me to cut a promo right before the fight, I was like, let me just sit down and do it, man.
Just don't tell me what to do.
Let me just go.
joe rogan
Let me think about what is at stake.
What this fight really means.
brendan schaub
What's it mean to me?
How do I feel about it?
Let me just go, man.
joe rogan
And that'll shine through.
You know, like when you talk about certain moments that you've seen out of a fighter that shows how special they really are.
brendan schaub
And gets me excited.
joe rogan
Yeah, like when you talk about Anderson when he front-kicked Vitor Belfort in the face.
It was an electric moment, you know, that he's capable of doing these movements that just look so much faster and so much more accurate than you expected.
You know, Anderson in his prime, some of his performances, man, were just so stunning.
Now, when I'm talking about that guy, like, I don't need a script.
Tell me what?
brendan schaub
I know more than you guys do.
Who wrote this?
No, no, I'll tell you what I feel about it.
joe rogan
Nobody ever wrote anything for me.
brendan schaub
No, yeah.
joe rogan
I've been doing it that way from the beginning.
brendan schaub
That's why it comes off so good.
joe rogan
Yeah, when you hear a guy like reading off a teleprompter in the beginning of a fight, like in the promo of the fight, like when they're talking about what's happening, what's at stake, it just doesn't feel right.
Even if it's like kind of crazy talk like Teddy Atlas.
Like when Teddy Atlas...
brendan schaub
You see, it's real though.
joe rogan
It's real.
It's real.
You gotta have real.
brendan schaub
It's some crazy shit, but it's real.
joe rogan
Reading off teleprompters is just brutal.
brendan schaub
What was the thing you read though with Bisping and Gisby?
Just breaking down the fight?
joe rogan
It was just some douchey sports guy article about it, and I was like, ah, saying that George St. Pierre was getting off his rocking chair to come out.
And Brown kicks some nobody in the head.
I'm like, no, no.
He's coming out to fight George St. Pierre, who is...
brendan schaub
That card is stacked.
joe rogan
George St. Pierre, rather, is coming out of retirement to fight Michael Bisping, who is the UFC middleweight fucking champion of the world.
brendan schaub
Legit middleweight.
He took it from Luke Rockhold.
You can say what you want, but he still took the belt.
You go out, but he only defended against Dan Henderson.
unidentified
So what?
brendan schaub
Who cares?
joe rogan
He did.
brendan schaub
He beat him.
joe rogan
He did.
Yeah, he's a legit, straight lineage, 185 pound champ of the world, you know?
brendan schaub
When I see that fight, I just...
Again, going on my tours and seeing the actual reaction face-to-face with fans when I talk about it, it's very lukewarm.
What do you guys think?
joe rogan
We've got to wait for Robert Whittaker to heal up.
He's the interim champ.
And that's going to be a while.
His knee's pretty fucked, apparently.
So he's got to heal up his knee.
And once that's done, then you get to see what happens after Bisping fights GSP. Here's the thing, though.
brendan schaub
And I love Bisping.
I wish he was a bigger draw, but Bisping vs.
Yoel, not huge ratings.
Bisping vs.
Robert Whittaker, not huge ratings.
There's nothing he can really do there.
joe rogan
Who's Luke Rockhold fighting again?
brendan schaub
He's fighting David Branch.
joe rogan
That's right.
That's an interesting fight.
That's September, what, the 16th or something like that?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
David Brandt from World Series, his first fight in the UFC was terrible, but it's also his first in a long time.
He was the World Series champion at light heavyweight and middleweight.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
So, you know.
joe rogan
Gerald Harris knocked him out with a slam in his first UFC fight way back in the day.
brendan schaub
He had a rough UFC career.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
And then left, you know, did work in World Series.
You know, for Luke Rockwell, I think it's more of him just getting back into things.
joe rogan
Right.
Yeah.
But he can't take this kid light.
brendan schaub
No.
No, Luke's so talented, man.
joe rogan
Yeah, he is so talented.
brendan schaub
Luke's fucking silly talented.
joe rogan
Yeah, David Branch has won a lot of fights in a row.
brendan schaub
Lost to Anthony Johnson by decision.
joe rogan
That's pretty crazy.
brendan schaub
Lost to...
joe rogan
Lost as a light heavyweight to Anthony Johnson.
Go up to...
brendan schaub
Paul Harris ripped his leg off.
joe rogan
Did he?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
He caught him?
brendan schaub
Oh, yeah.
joe rogan
In World Series of Fighting?
brendan schaub
Yeah, there you go.
No, UFC. Oh, that's right.
joe rogan
He got a heel hook quick.
brendan schaub
Bad.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
And he's a black belt on the ground, too.
joe rogan
Second round, huh?
144. Hmm.
I felt like I was the first round.
UFC 116. Did he fight Paul Harris more than once?
No.
Just one time.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Okay.
Gerald Harris.
That's what it is.
Gerald Harris knocked him out in UFC 116. Lesnar versus Carwin.
Wow.
brendan schaub
That's a while ago.
joe rogan
Fuck yeah, it was.
brendan schaub
That's right.
KO slam.
joe rogan
Yeah, I remember that.
brendan schaub
Because I think that got knocked out of the night because I thought I was going to get it.
joe rogan
Because that was...
Really?
That got knocked out of the night?
A slam?
brendan schaub
I'm pretty sure that KO slam, he got an award for that.
joe rogan
Interesting.
So go up?
Go up?
All the way to the top?
brendan schaub
He has his hands full with Luke Ross.
joe rogan
Yes, he does.
So he beat Vinny Magalese, who's a phenomenal submission artist.
Who else did he beat?
Christoph Jokto, who's a decent fighter.
brendan schaub
Jokto was ranked 9 at the time or 10 at the time, but that just shows you where the middleweight division is.
joe rogan
Split decision, though.
brendan schaub
He beat Okami.
joe rogan
Yeah, but Yushin Okami has never been the same.
brendan schaub
He beat Jesse Taylor, who's the champ.
joe rogan
But Yushin Okami, after he got stopped by...
brendan schaub
Tim Boach.
joe rogan
Tim Boach, and then he got stopped by Jacare.
He got brutally stopped.
brendan schaub
Then he left.
joe rogan
Yeah, he just wasn't the same.
And all of that is after Anderson.
brendan schaub
Correct.
But, I mean, you look at David Branch compared to Luke Rockhold's lineup, it's insane.
Luke Rockhold's, I mean, big difference.
No, this is a terrible matchup for David Branch.
joe rogan
Unless he can rise to the occasion.
brendan schaub
It's a big if.
joe rogan
They've been talking a lot of shit to each other, too.
brendan schaub
Have they?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Talking a lot of shit.
brendan schaub
I mean, look at Rockhold, Weidman, Machida, Bisping, Boach, Philippou.
joe rogan
He hasn't fought since December of 2000, oh, January of 2016. June, sorry.
brendan schaub
It's been a while, man.
joe rogan
And then before that, he's on the McGregor card when he fought Weidman, McGregor, Aldo.
That was the best performance of his career.
Beat the shit out of him.
brendan schaub
It was a close fight, though, before that.
I thought Leo Machido, he looked his best.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
He also fucked Bisping up.
Remember he choked him out with one arm?
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
He head kicked him and choked him out with one arm?
joe rogan
He caught him with that question mark kick.
Yeah.
And then Tim Bosch, he fucked him up with an inverted triangle Kimura.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
That Costa-Filippu fight?
Yeah, they got to talk Costa into walking out to take that fight.
Really?
Yeah.
unidentified
Why not?
brendan schaub
He was over it.
He didn't want to fight anymore.
And my manager was like, dude, if you don't walk out there, this will taint your career for the rest of your life.
unidentified
Wow.
joe rogan
And he was literally not going to fight.
brendan schaub
He was like, I'm not going there.
Calling his name.
He's like, I'm not going.
unidentified
Wow.
brendan schaub
And Lex McMahon was like, you better get your ass out there.
I'm telling you, you're going to regret this for the rest of your life if you don't go out there.
joe rogan
Why did he not want to go out there?
brendan schaub
I think he was just over it.
The nerves, everything.
He was like, I don't want to do this anymore.
And Luke Rockhold was like, here, let me help you.
Gish, lever kick.
Get out of here.
That's the business we're in.
Oh shit, you don't want to go out there.
joe rogan
Well, there's a decision that people make when they've taken too much punishment and then they just can't get excited about performing anymore.
They can't get excited about competing anymore.
There's a decision that people make where once they make that decision, you gotta just get out because you will never be the guy that you were when you didn't give a fuck and you were hungry and young and you're gonna run into that guy.
You're gonna run into that guy, that guy that was you.
You're gonna run into him.
brendan schaub
He's there.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
You couldn't even tell.
Costa Philippou looked normal in that fight.
It looks like he was trying to win.
brendan schaub
I think once you get in there, it's kind of fight or flight, you know?
joe rogan
Yeah, I mean, it goes back to his instinct.
Oh, boy.
Luke Rockhold, that's a very good left kick to the body, man.
brendan schaub
He's great.
Oh, that's a legal kick.
joe rogan
It's legal.
Kick to the body when you're on the ground is legal.
brendan schaub
Ah, man, that kind of hit his head, but yeah.
joe rogan
Did it?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Go back to the game.
brendan schaub
Grazed up.
joe rogan
At the very end of it?
Powerful, Vimeo.
brendan schaub
Not that it mattered.
joe rogan
How's this legally online?
Oh, how dare you.
See?
brendan schaub
Oh, yeah, you're right.
Right behind the shoulder blade.
That's legal.
joe rogan
Yeah.
It's kind of weird that you could do that.
Can you stomp the body when it goes down?
No.
Not really, right?
brendan schaub
No.
joe rogan
You can axe kick, though.
brendan schaub
Oh, that's right.
joe rogan
But can you, like, push stomp kick?
brendan schaub
That's such bullshit, isn't it?
joe rogan
Can you, like, you can't go down stomp, but can you stomp forward?
brendan schaub
You can do it on your feet.
joe rogan
Yeah, because it's kind of like a front kick.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it's weird.
joe rogan
It's kind of dumb, right?
brendan schaub
It's weird.
Anyways, I think, I like David Bransford.
I think Luke Merkson.
joe rogan
Interesting.
brendan schaub
But again, Luke's not a huge pay-per-view draw.
Like, if you're the UFC and John being out, you're like, yeah, Luke has every reason he should be.
I don't get it.
But with John being out, just go through the champs.
They got Mighty Mouse.
Ain't happening.
joe rogan
No time, baby.
brendan schaub
No time.
They're banking on no time.
joe rogan
No time's coming up.
So we had two fights.
brendan schaub
He's had four, right?
joe rogan
In the UFC? Yeah, he's had four.
I think he's had...
He fought Misha.
brendan schaub
No.
joe rogan
Sir Kunov.
unidentified
He had fights before.
joe rogan
Stopped him.
He stopped...
How many fights does he have in the UFC? He's not pulling up?
It doesn't say?
Wikipedia, son.
How does it not say?
Yeah, just go to his Wikipedia, I guess.
I feel like he's had two fights in the UFC. Really?
brendan schaub
I feel like he's had three.
joe rogan
He might have had three.
brendan schaub
I'm going to say three.
joe rogan
You might be right.
It's not a lot, though.
brendan schaub
I agree.
It's not a lot.
joe rogan
What does it say there?
He's had three.
Okay, OSP. Damn, split decision, OSP. That's right.
That's right.
That's right.
That was a fight he took on short notice.
brendan schaub
I remember that.
joe rogan
That was in Houston.
brendan schaub
That's right.
But then he's just been Merk and Gus.
God, he's just...
But you look at his division, there's just nothing for him.
joe rogan
So he has to fight Gus Finner DC. Well, Merk and Misha is not as impressive, although Misha's a very good striker and a very good submission artist.
He's really good at submissions.
That was like, okay, he caught that dude coming in, clipped him with one punch, knocked him out.
That's impressive.
But doing it to Jimmy Maniwa, you gotta go, oh, okay.
This guy's fucking for real.
Like, if he could do that to Maniwa, he could do that to a lot of people.
brendan schaub
You think?
joe rogan
Yeah.
I want to see him do it to someone else, too, obviously.
You want to see him fight.
Next level stuff.
brendan schaub
You know what I think is going to happen?
And I do like him.
Shit, I hope he becomes champ.
Be hilarious for many reasons.
But I think his technique of rushing in like that, you get to a certain level where guys like DC and Gustin go, you want to do what?
And then you get fucked up.
And he's going to have to adapt to it.
joe rogan
But here's the thing about that level.
brendan schaub
There's levels to this game.
Light heavyweight goes...
John Jones, Gusvin, DC, and then...
joe rogan
Right.
brendan schaub
And then second level, and then after that, it's a fucking free-for-all.
joe rogan
Yeah, like, what does DC do now?
Like, if they give him back the title again...
brendan schaub
But this is the thing, in the public's...
Eyes.
It's such a tough sell.
Like, here's the best light heavyweight in the world.
Everyone's like, nope, we've seen him lose twice now.
joe rogan
We've seen him get put to sleep by John in the second fight.
brendan schaub
You want worst case scenario for DC? I think DC's the greatest light heavyweight of all time when you take out John.
You want to talk about worst case scenario?
They go, tainted supplement, dick peels again.
Six months of suspension.
We're going to strip the belt from you.
DC, here's the belt.
You've got to fight John again in six months.
Go get you some.
unidentified
Oh my God.
brendan schaub
Give me that goddamn belt back.
Give me my fucking belt back.
joe rogan
Okay, but here's the thing.
We don't know what was really going on now, right?
We don't know.
brendan schaub
With John?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Now, I think we are allowed to have complete open speculation with zero concern for being respectful.
brendan schaub
Yes.
joe rogan
I think after the dick pull thing, I go, look, man, they did his party and he was taking some dick pills.
Let's let it go.
Coke?
I don't give a fuck about Coke.
That's not helping you.
Then you hear about this, you go, wait a minute.
brendan schaub
Something's going on.
joe rogan
Okay.
What is this?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
I want to know what this is.
brendan schaub
Because, like, JDS got flagged, right?
And they pulled him off Francis Gano.
I don't get JDS to go, come on, alright, that's steroids for sure.
Because he's had a clean history.
joe rogan
Right.
brendan schaub
With John, it's one thing after another.
joe rogan
Well, JDS also got flagged for a diuretic.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I'm just saying, let's say they didn't say what...
joe rogan
And it was trace amounts.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Trace amounts.
brendan schaub
But with JDS, I give them benefit of the doubt.
Alright, it happened once, whatever.
But John, it's like, come on, bro.
And then with the dick pills, a lot of people are like, that's kind of covering up recovery therapy for when you're on testosterone and stuff like that.
That's a little shady.
Whatever, we'll put that to the side.
Now it's like, come on, man.
joe rogan
Well, this is a weird one, because this one is if he was taking what you describe...
As some short-acting, quick-leaving-your-system steroid.
Some drug that makes you aggressive.
You gotta go, okay.
How long was he doing this for?
Like, was he doing this during training?
Like, did this amp him up?
Did this help his work rate?
Did this make him more aggressive and more confident in training?
Did it add to his confidence when he was fighting?
Like, what is this?
We don't know.
We know that story that Shale Sutton told.
You know that story that Shale Sutton told on my podcast about John being under the entire, like, under the octagon?
brendan schaub
When the USADA came and pissed under the octagon, right?
joe rogan
This is what they wanted to do.
This was before you had to expose your whereabouts.
You didn't have to disclose your whereabouts back then.
So when they showed up at the gym, John apparently saw them pull up and went underneath the octagon.
He thought they would leave.
They didn't leave.
They stayed the entire time.
And they waited for the gym to close.
The gym closed, they shut the lights out, and then John came out of the octagon.
brendan schaub
Jesus Christ.
joe rogan
This is what Chael Sonnen says.
brendan schaub
Chael's really not a liar either, besides if he's telling he's not taking steroids when he's fighting.
joe rogan
Yeah, I don't know if he got it from...
I don't know what source Chael's using.
brendan schaub
He's pretty reliable.
joe rogan
Right.
He's definitely in the know, right?
brendan schaub
I agree.
joe rogan
I don't know if it's true or not, but it makes you think, like, okay, well, what is that for?
Is that for pot?
You know?
brendan schaub
He likes to party.
Was he worried about coke?
I know, but when there's this much smoke, I'm going to go, what's going on here, man?
joe rogan
Right.
What is going on?
brendan schaub
How about Chael Sonnen?
We're at the press conference.
This is four days before the fight.
He's working for, I think, ESPN for the Mayweather stuff.
I'm working for Showtime.
He comes by and he goes, Yo!
Max Cameron didn't take you on that $100,000 bet.
He'll win a round or more, right?
I went, No.
He goes, I'll take it.
I went, Chael, you take this bet, you're going to fucking pay me.
He goes, I swear to God I will pay you.
Shakes my hand and goes, If McGregor wins one round or more, you give me $100,000?
He goes, Yeah, he's not going to touch him.
He's not going to win a round.
Cool, man.
Shake his hand.
Then after the fight, he just texted me yesterday morning.
He goes, hey bro, I'll be in LA, I'll drop the cash off.
I'm like, you don't have to pay me, man.
It's not that serious.
unidentified
What?
brendan schaub
He was dead serious.
joe rogan
I'll drop the cash off, you said no to $100,000?
You think he would have said no to you?
brendan schaub
I do.
joe rogan
He would have made you pay.
brendan schaub
I do.
joe rogan
You're out of your fucking mind.
brendan schaub
Nope.
I'm telling you, this type of dude Chael is.
Remember when Chael and Nate fought?
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Nate fell on hard times.
Chael sent without...
joe rogan
Nate Marquardt, by the way.
brendan schaub
Nate Marquardt, yeah.
joe rogan
Nate fought Nate Diaz?
brendan schaub
Yeah, sent him a check in the mail.
Was like, okay, I know you're going through hard times.
Here's some money.
So when he helped my friend, he's always had a free pass with me.
Always.
joe rogan
Wow, that's very nice of you.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Very nice of you.
brendan schaub
Muscle Rich.
joe rogan
Whoa!
brendan schaub
Just kidding.
Not Rogan Rich.
unidentified
Whoa!
brendan schaub
Not Scroogey.
Not Scroogey here.
Not Conor McGregor, Rich.
Who is these days?
How about Conor?
One fight richer than you, son.
joe rogan
How about Floyd?
brendan schaub
Oh, he's a billionaire.
joe rogan
Yeah, Floyd is probably worth like $500 million now or something.
But they said he owed money to the IRS. I talked to him about that.
brendan schaub
He was literally like, dude, my taxes, it's the same equivalent if they flagged us.
He's like, you pay like, whatever, $5,000?
I make so much money, I owe $5 million.
I can pay it whenever.
It just got blown up in the news.
He's like, no one's broke here, for God's sakes.
Legit point, sir.
joe rogan
Good point.
brendan schaub
Go ahead and sell one of those watches.
joe rogan
I wonder how long he can keep up that lifestyle, though, with that kind of spending.
Like, his spending's insane.
brendan schaub
It's not Johnny Depp insane.
Like, there's Johnny Depp.
Remember, we've been over that.
That's some shit.
unidentified
Paul!
joe rogan
He has, like, 14 houses!
brendan schaub
There's Johnny Depp insane, and then there's Floyd.
joe rogan
Johnny, how about two?
How about two houses?
Floyd may want to become boxing's first billion-dollar fighter.
brendan schaub
Can you name the other billion athletes?
Tiger Woods.
Michael Jordan.
Jack Nicholson.
joe rogan
Jack Nicholson.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
Which was surprising me.
She got 500 million.
joe rogan
Come on.
brendan schaub
At least.
joe rogan
What about taxes?
brendan schaub
Nah, she's savage.
joe rogan
But taxes.
You don't really have a billion when you have a billion.
brendan schaub
That's true.
You have a shitload of money, though.
You have a shitload of money.
I wish that was a problem.
joe rogan
She got a hundred.
unidentified
I bet she got two hundo.
brendan schaub
That bitch crazy, too, in his car with clubs and shit.
joe rogan
Yeah, well.
brendan schaub
Well, he kind of deserved it, maybe.
joe rogan
She gets a little upset.
brendan schaub
So you got Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicholson, Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan.
joe rogan
Arnold Palmer made a billion?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Knocking a little ball off that delicious drink.
Oh, that's right.
brendan schaub
No, I'm just kidding.
joe rogan
Tiger Woods, she got estimated at 100 million.
Chomp, chomp, chomp.
It's a lot.
It's a lot of cash.
Baby, baby.
brendan schaub
Set.
joe rogan
That's a lot of cash.
Baby, baby.
brendan schaub
Set.
joe rogan
Did you see that video when Tiger got arrested for drunk driving?
brendan schaub
Yeah, it was hilarious.
joe rogan
He is just fucked up on pills.
brendan schaub
He was on...
Did you see?
I think they found six things in his system.
joe rogan
Why did he think that he could drive on pain pills?
brendan schaub
Because Tiger Woods.
joe rogan
Who told him?
brendan schaub
Tiger Woods.
joe rogan
But doesn't he know?
Like, bro, you just got back surgery, and you're taking, like, heavy-duty opiates or whatever the fuck they're giving you?
brendan schaub
No, he's taking, uh...
joe rogan
What was he taking?
brendan schaub
He was taking a bunch of shit.
joe rogan
Look at that face!
brendan schaub
That fool's eyes are so fucked.
joe rogan
Dude, time to shave your head.
Take it from another bald guy.
Let it go.
It's like that song from the movie Frozen.
brendan schaub
Let it go.
joe rogan
Let it go.
Can't hold me back anymore.
brendan schaub
You just gotta ditch that shit.
joe rogan
Yeah.
I mean, he's not a good-looking guy anyway.
brendan schaub
He's terrible-looking.
joe rogan
Shake your head, bro.
You don't want to worry about that nonsense you got going on right there.
brendan schaub
I would just go ahead and wear glasses if I had those two cock-eyes, too, man.
You have a billion dollars, bro.
Minus a hundred million, but...
joe rogan
Clear glasses that Connor was wearing.
brendan schaub
Yeah, get some of those.
Like, Dave Chappelle was wearing some that I definitely want to get.
It was like a brown frame, and they weren't so dark where they're sunglasses.
They were, like, tinted where it looked cool.
Like, get those if you have a cock-eye.
joe rogan
You know what the move is?
He goes with like yellow aviators, Hunter S. Thompson style.
Yes.
And just starts dressing like Johnny Depp and just starts flaunting the fact that he's a freak.
I agree.
unidentified
Let your freak flag fly.
brendan schaub
What the inner freaking freak go?
joe rogan
He's tied to the system with all that endorsement money.
unidentified
Not anymore.
brendan schaub
Oh, that's true.
Nike still fucks with them, right?
joe rogan
A lot of people do.
brendan schaub
No, really?
joe rogan
A lot of companies do.
brendan schaub
Even after this?
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Dude, remember how big he was?
joe rogan
He's not even doing well.
brendan schaub
Remember how big Tiger Woods was?
joe rogan
Gigantai.
Yeah, Gigantai.
brendan schaub
Made golf like cool.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
He was the guy.
I saw him.
I was out in that bitch swinging away.
unidentified
Look at this.
joe rogan
Oh my God.
So he had Vicodin.
Yeah.
And Dilaudid.
Jesus Christ.
He was taking some shit they gave people that were dying of like bullet wounds in the Old West days.
brendan schaub
Bro, Vicodin, Dilaudid, and Xanax.
joe rogan
Jesus Christ.
brendan schaub
You know what?
unidentified
He's on Xanax.
brendan schaub
Why is he on Ambien?
joe rogan
Why does it say a sleep drug Xanax?
Xanax is not a sleep drug.
brendan schaub
It's a relaxer, right?
joe rogan
The anti-insomnia drug Ambien.
Why do they say sleep drug Xanax?
No, sleep drug is Ambien, you dummies.
brendan schaub
You fucking idiots.
joe rogan
This is fake news.
Xanax is an anti-anxiety drug.
brendan schaub
Either way, it's proof.
He likes to party.
joe rogan
Yeah, man.
That's a lot of shit.
Go back to that, please.
brendan schaub
But he doesn't really play golf anymore.
joe rogan
He does, but he's not doing good.
He was found unconscious in his Mercedes Benz, which was parked awkwardly on the side of the road and had damaged the driver's side.
brendan schaub
Bro, what are you doing?
joe rogan
He hit a bunch of shit.
brendan schaub
Did you hear how he fucked up his back and knee?
Have you heard this story?
joe rogan
No.
brendan schaub
He was upset because his father was in the military.
He was obsessed with military.
He actually trained with Navy SEALs.
Like, put on the full thing, went through this Navy SEAL training, like, obviously not real shit, but doing all the marches and shit and fucked his stuff up.
joe rogan
That's how he fucked himself up?
No.
brendan schaub
It's one of the ways he fucked his knee and back up.
Whoa.
He was on this, like, intense, like, Navy SEAL training, like, shooting with him and stuff.
joe rogan
That's so stupid.
The Secret History of Tiger Woods, is that what's in there?
Wow.
The death of his father said a battle raging inside the world's greatest golfer, how he waged that war through an obsession with the Navy SEALs.
It's a tale of how Tiger lost his way.
brendan schaub
I haven't read this either.
joe rogan
Wow.
Yeah, man, there's a thing.
I agree that you have to have mental toughness to work out hard and to get through brutal workouts.
You have to.
unidentified
You have to.
brendan schaub
Don't got to go Navy SEAL on a bitch, though.
joe rogan
That's what I'm saying.
I'm saying, you gotta build your body up to that, and you are a different person.
You're a fucking professional athlete.
You're not a warrior going overseas to take bullets, fight for your life, and kill bad guys.
What you're doing is a very specialized thing that is worth a fucking billion dollars!
brendan schaub
And you're also hitting that little tiny ball on this calm, quiet golf course.
I don't need you to be in the waves trying to learn how not to drown and fight sharks.
joe rogan
It's like taking a dude who bought a brand new Ferrari and taking him on one of those crazy dirt courses that they have those off-road Porsches drive on.
brendan schaub
Oh my God.
joe rogan
You know those, you ever seen those things?
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Those guys are like, they have one guy next to them.
I never, I need to ask someone what the fuck they're doing.
unidentified
The other guy?
joe rogan
Next time I have like Chris Harris on, I'll ask him.
There's another guy with a notepad.
The rally cars.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it's the maps.
joe rogan
And he's going, two clicks left, one turned right.
Yeah, he tells them where to go.
brendan schaub
He's his navigator.
joe rogan
Yeah.
unidentified
Like, exactly.
He knows the whole course, like, dead on.
joe rogan
He's reading it off a book.
brendan schaub
Yeah, or just use MapQuest that says...
joe rogan
Those guys are maniacs.
Pull up some video of rally drivers.
brendan schaub
Or get rid of the fucking dead weight telling you the directions.
Use MapQuest with a voice.
unidentified
You can't.
joe rogan
You can't.
brendan schaub
I bet they could step up their app game and do something.
unidentified
No, no, no.
joe rogan
You have to have that guy.
He needs a job.
brendan schaub
He needs a job.
He studies the course.
joe rogan
Taking care of the guy with the fucking notepad.
And he knows how long it takes for you to get there, too.
Because if you're driving at your fastest, even if you're off for five or six seconds, you're in the neighborhood.
brendan schaub
He knows what's up.
joe rogan
Those cars are wild, man.
It's such a different style of driving because the dirt makes the tires break loose constantly.
brendan schaub
Have you ever considered going the Porsche track here where we can take all the cars out?
joe rogan
Yeah, let's do it.
brendan schaub
I know.
Don't they have a new one near LAX? They have a new one not far from here, but the guy was telling me they have great restaurants.
He's like, just book it, we'll take care of you.
joe rogan
Let's do it, Brendan Chubb!
brendan schaub
They pick out the car, they take care of the tire.
No, not our cars.
joe rogan
Flat out Scrooge McDuck.
unidentified
That's what I'm saying.
brendan schaub
Pop a couple of edibles.
Give me that GT3 RS. Let me get wild on that thing.
That's right.
Let's go.
I don't need some co-pilot.
Just let me do my thing.
joe rogan
Yeah, come on.
Go full season on this.
Yeah, look at this guy.
unidentified
61 left, 100. 61 left, 100. Holy shit, they must be best friends.
joe rogan
Jesus, they're flying.
brendan schaub
They're best friends.
You'd have to be best friends.
Hey, bro.
joe rogan
Wow, one left.
unidentified
One left.
joe rogan
This is nuts, man.
You see that red light?
brendan schaub
That's the shifter, yeah?
joe rogan
That is a sequential manual.
It's a manual, but you just push up to go up and down to go down.
You don't have to find the gear.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
For speed, right?
For quickness.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Yeah, you don't have to find the perfect gear.
You know, like if you're using that H pattern, you're going up and then you're going down and then you go up to the right.
Yeah, so it's down three, down two, up one.
You know, the way you're doing it is, it's very different.
brendan schaub
Although my new Porsche PDK will shit on this.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Yeah, it'll shit on it.
But this is probably more fun.
brendan schaub
For this, not sitting in traffic.
Yeah.
Like when I jump on that road and I get to send that dead heat traffic.
I go down that Topanga Canyon, I just open that bitch up.
I take some risks too.
joe rogan
Yeah, but it's not as fun as driving a manual to me.
If I was driving in traffic all the time, there's not a chance in the world I would want a manual.
brendan schaub
You don't drive your GT3 in the 405. Sometimes.
Not five in the afternoon.
joe rogan
Sure, I do.
brendan schaub
Really?
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Even like...
joe rogan
Yep.
brendan schaub
Oh, wow.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Sometimes I just like driving that thing.
I just want to drive.
brendan schaub
Me too.
Like sometimes I take the long way home or at night I just jump on the Pacific Coast Highway.
joe rogan
2018 BMW M5 pack 600 horsepower and MX drive all-wheel drive system.
jamie vernon
Zero to 60 and 3.2.
joe rogan
That's a big car too.
You gotta pay for the extra.
jamie vernon
That doesn't top out at like $140.
It only tops out at $111 unless you pay for the package.
brendan schaub
BMW needs to step their game up though.
I feel like they're losing the battle with everyone else right now.
Mercedes is just...
joe rogan
It's ahead of them.
It's definitely ahead of them.
You know what BMW has coming out, though?
An 8 Series.
The 8 Series sedan.
brendan schaub
What?
They're bringing it back?
joe rogan
It looks like a spaceship.
brendan schaub
Do you remember the 850?
joe rogan
Yes.
brendan schaub
The front end?
joe rogan
They were V12s.
unidentified
Did he?
brendan schaub
God bless them.
joe rogan
I fucking love those.
brendan schaub
Those things are a nightmare now.
unidentified
Dude.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Look at this new one, though.
unidentified
Oh, shit, son!
joe rogan
Wait to go full screen, son.
Look at this.
You're only seeing the front of it.
Wait till they go on the side.
Look what this thing looks like.
It's wicked, man.
unidentified
Damn!
jamie vernon
So it's like an i8, but not the electric version or something.
joe rogan
No, no, no.
It doesn't look that spaceship-y.
No, no, no.
You know what it's like?
It's like the Mercedes S-Class Coupe.
brendan schaub
Yeah, those are sick.
joe rogan
That's what it's like.
brendan schaub
And it's the big body, I'm assuming twin turbo.
joe rogan
I don't know what the fuck that's got under the hood.
I think all their cars are turbo now.
brendan schaub
If it's anything like the 850 back in the day, look at the back end, though.
Damn, that thing is bad.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Good for them.
joe rogan
Here they'll spin around.
Look at that.
brendan schaub
I don't like that I8. That's a door open.
That I8 pisses me off.
joe rogan
Nah, that's a Tron car.
brendan schaub
I test drove that thing.
I'm like, get the fuck out of my face, man.
unidentified
What is this?
joe rogan
It's got too many different colors, too.
And you know what?
It's got skinny tires.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
Yes!
joe rogan
Can't.
unidentified
Fuck.
joe rogan
I need fat tires.
unidentified
Me too.
joe rogan
I don't even like the tires on the Corvette.
How about that?
brendan schaub
I need some fat ass tires.
joe rogan
I like it.
Even though, well, the drop-in diamond.
Shut your hole.
I like the way it looks.
brendan schaub
Me too.
joe rogan
I like fat asses and fat tires.
unidentified
Fix it!
brendan schaub
And take old bitties.
joe rogan
Fix it!
brendan schaub
Damn, that thing is dope.
joe rogan
It's pretty sick.
You used to have the M6, right?
brendan schaub
You had the M6. That thing was fine.
That thing was a monster.
Heavy.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Straight up V10. But it's smooth down the highway, right?
Yeah.
Nothing's funner than the car I have now.
That Porsche GTS is...
joe rogan
You know, they say that's the best of the Porsches.
There was an article that I just read in one of the car magazines.
brendan schaub
For sure sent me that.
joe rogan
That said, yeah, see if you can find...
brendan schaub
So I can brag to my friends.
joe rogan
Go to Porsche GTS is the best Porsche.
It's like a very recent article that I actually read this morning on Google.
brendan schaub
Tight move.
joe rogan
Yeah, they were saying that it's the best version of it.
You know, you got your GT3, which is like super hardcore.
brendan schaub
I test drove that.
Remember I called you.
I was test driving the GT3, and I'm like, Joe, you love this thing?
You said, unless you got another vehicle, man, for you driving every day is a bad idea.
joe rogan
It'll get loud and it scrapes on everything.
brendan schaub
Well, the GTS is low, too.
I scraped the front and felt like crying.
joe rogan
It's another inch or so.
brendan schaub
But the GT3 has a button that raises, yeah?
joe rogan
Yes, front end.
brendan schaub
The GTS doesn't.
joe rogan
Well, it's not the GT3. It does because you buy it that way.
brendan schaub
It's an option.
joe rogan
That option wasn't there.
But TechArt...
It makes an aftermarket one, so you can get that, get it installed, and it'll raise it up.
I know a bunch of Porsche dealerships that do it.
Yeah, mine is aftermarket.
Can they do it on my GT3 or my GTS? Yes, my GT3 has it aftermarket.
Oh, no.
brendan schaub
Just saved the day.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
I have to park on the street because my driveway's like this.
joe rogan
Yeah, I had to take one of my other buttons from something else and have it dedicated to that GT3 button.
As a matter of fact, I think they took it from a blank and they installed the button in it.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I have a blank where you can put it.
joe rogan
I have all the options.
Mine is right on my rearview mirror, rather.
When I go near something, I'll hit that button.
jamie vernon
Was the best car on Earth?
joe rogan
What did you say it was?
Porsche GTS. 2018 Porsche GTS is the best 911, they were saying.
They were just going over like it's like hardcore but not too ridiculous like a GT3 RS and that it's pretty slick.
Did you see that one guy?
He spent a shitload of money to take...
The Porsche, the brand new GT3 RS is only PDK. They don't make it in a manual.
So this guy spent a shitload of money to have a six-speed from a Porsche 911 R installed in a GT3 RS. That must cost so much.
brendan schaub
He must be Scrooge.
Yeah, he's Scrooge of Portia.
joe rogan
Well, if you even have one of those things.
Is this it?
Pull up the top of the article.
What does it say?
unidentified
I think.
joe rogan
Quick take.
Not the fastest 911, but possibly the best.
When is it from?
August?
Yeah.
brendan schaub
The thing's fast as fuck, though.
joe rogan
That's it.
Yeah.
Well, it's not the fastest, though.
The 911 Turbo.
brendan schaub
The Turbo stuff.
joe rogan
That thing's a goddamn space machine.
Like, Ben's time.
brendan schaub
Have you test drove one yet?
joe rogan
2007. Or, uh, 2000, um, not 7, uh, 2009 or 10 I drove one.
brendan schaub
The new ones, like I test drove that, the GT3, and that.
I was just in love with my car.
joe rogan
They're so fast.
brendan schaub
They're stupid fast.
joe rogan
And they're four-wheel drive.
unidentified
Yes.
joe rogan
But the new ones even fast, way faster than that one.
The one that I drove.
brendan schaub
They're insanely fast.
They're insane.
The GT3, it's just, I felt like, it was like, I like the feel, but yeah.
joe rogan
So hardcore.
You would love the turbo.
If you got one of those new turbos, you'd be like...
What in the fuck?
brendan schaub
I test drove that in the GTS. I went to the GTS. Why'd you go with that?
Because my car, it's like that lava orange.
It has the duck wing on it.
It's just like a vintage Porsche to me.
I saw on the show and right away, I'm like, that's it.
I'll look at these other ones.
No, I'm like, that's it.
I test drove the G3, everything.
I just, I don't know.
joe rogan
The duck wing.
brendan schaub
The duck wing got me.
joe rogan
Duck wing's dope.
brendan schaub
Because when I was a kid, I always saw a poster for a Porsche and it had the old school, it was green, and I'm forgetting it had a duck wing on it.
I'm like, that has a duck wing.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's like 1973 RS. Yeah, it's so cool, man.
You know those cars, those 1973 RS's are worth over a million dollars now.
brendan schaub
So sick.
joe rogan
Like, what?
If you bought it back in the day, it was like 20 grand.
Now it's worth a million dollars.
brendan schaub
Aren't you doing something with a Porsche?
Old school Porsche?
joe rogan
Not that old school.
It's a 1988 something.
86 or something.
brendan schaub
Sharkworks just turned that thing into band or what?
joe rogan
It's an RS America.
A 964. It's like one of the last the air-cooled cars.
The last the air-cooled was the 993, which is like a little bigger.
This is a 964. The air-cooled.
brendan schaub
Everyone's obsessed with the air-cooled.
joe rogan
It's a different sound.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it's just a different animal.
joe rogan
You can get them pretty cheap, too.
It's a different kind of car.
And if you go earlier than that, you get them even cheaper.
You can get them pretty cheap for the 1980s cars.
brendan schaub
I think that one I found, it was a 78 Carrera 911, but it had some reconstructive stuff to it.
It looked fun.
It's a bad investment.
joe rogan
Oh, I saw that car.
You sent me a picture of it.
brendan schaub
I want that.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Those are ass crazy, man.
Those things...
brendan schaub
They're dangerous.
joe rogan
Do you know about how to drive those?
Like, when you're taking turns, you have to keep your foot on the gas.
brendan schaub
I know.
There's no...
joe rogan
If you let off the gas, they have throttle oversteer.
Like, what is it called?
Throttle, let off, oversteer or something like that?
brendan schaub
Yeah, they have no power steering.
I'm trying to go out like James Dean.
That's exactly what I'm trying to do.
It was silver, too?
joe rogan
Well, they're really light.
brendan schaub
Yeah, I know.
They look fun.
joe rogan
They feel different.
Like, my friend Alex from SharkWorks has a 964, and it feels different because they're so small.
It's like you're more connected to what you're doing.
It's really light and really small.
brendan schaub
Which is cool.
joe rogan
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Especially this day, like, going down to Pena King.
I'm not using an everyday car.
I just think it'd be fun.
Yeah.
I'm waiting for that, and I want a new Bronco as a daily driver.
joe rogan
The new, new Bronco?
brendan schaub
The new, new one.
You seen that thing?
I want that in white.
What's up?
joe rogan
I'm going to call it the Juice.
brendan schaub
And I live over by there.
What's up?
joe rogan
Who is going to buy the Juice's car?
They're going to put that up for sale, but an auction company just passed on it.
brendan schaub
Isn't it going for $350,000?
The actual, like, rides 350. Why?
I know this, I have no idea.
joe rogan
You'd have to be a ghoul.
brendan schaub
You'd have to be a real asshole.
Can you imagine if I drove up?
What is it?
Dude, this is the car!
This is the OJ car!
You're an asshole.
We can't be friends anymore.
joe rogan
Yeah.
OJ Simpson's white Bronco escape car.
Wow!
Goes on sale for $700,000 as a former agent decides it's time to cash in.
Decides it's time to cash in.
Right when OJ's getting out of jail, OJ's gonna kidnap this dude and go back to jail.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Because if this guy sells his Bronco for 700 grand...
brendan schaub
That's his fucking whip, man.
He's gonna stab you.
joe rogan
It looks like he's in pretty good shape.
I like the wheels.
unidentified
Right?
brendan schaub
Right?
Should we get it as like a company car or some shit?
joe rogan
$700,000.
That is the car.
unidentified
That's insane.
joe rogan
What year was it?
brendan schaub
It's a 93, right?
unidentified
No.
joe rogan
It can't be new.
It wasn't new at the time, I don't think.
1994, police chase.
What year is the car?
brendan schaub
I feel like the car is 93. Does it say?
jamie vernon
I want to say it was an 89 Bronco.
unidentified
Does that sound right?
joe rogan
Yeah, it sounds right to me.
brendan schaub
No, it's a 90s Bronco.
My pops had an 80s Bronco.
They're smaller.
unidentified
It doesn't say.
Huh.
brendan schaub
My dad had an Eddie Bauer.
92?
That's 92. I'm telling you.
My pops had an Eddie Bauer Bronco.
And the thing was tiny.
joe rogan
I remember the Eddie Bauer one.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
I was like, this is weird.
What are you, fly fishing in this thing?
brendan schaub
Yeah, why is this Eddie Bauer?
But I remember it had this cool trim on it.
My dad would say Eddie Bauer.
Like, it was a big deal.
Goddamn!
joe rogan
It's up for sale on Pawn Stars?
It's gonna be on Pawn Stars?
brendan schaub
I've already seen it.
The Pawn Star guy turned it down.
joe rogan
He did?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
He didn't want it?
He couldn't move.
brendan schaub
He said, I don't want that bad juju on my blood.
joe rogan
Well, there was blood in that car, man.
brendan schaub
OJ's blood.
joe rogan
Was it OJ's?
brendan schaub
Yeah, that's what they found him.
joe rogan
Yeah, he cut his own hand with a knife.
So sketchy.
unidentified
Allegedly.
brendan schaub
So sketchy.
joe rogan
Did you see him get released when they gave him parole?
Did you watch that?
brendan schaub
Yeah, he was crunk.
And the judge who did it was a huge football fan.
Did you know that?
joe rogan
What does it say?
It's an amazing shape.
I drove it around.
I found it a little odd.
But it runs great.
You found it a little odd.
Did it smell like murder?
unidentified
Did it smell like dead bitches?
brendan schaub
God, bro.
joe rogan
I watched it live.
I was in Italy.
I wasn't gonna miss it.
I was like, I need to see this.
brendan schaub
OJ getting out?
unidentified
Yeah.
brendan schaub
Would you have him on the podcast?
joe rogan
I joked around about it.
I put it on the podcast.
I put it on Twitter.
Should I have him on the podcast or nah?
brendan schaub
Or nah.
joe rogan
And Moshe Kasher was the first one to respond.
brendan schaub
What'd she say?
joe rogan
Moshe, the comic.
Yeah.
It's a he.
Oh, my bad.
Natasha's the wife.
brendan schaub
That's right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Natasha, Moshe, that's tough.
joe rogan
Yeah, I getcha.
Yeah, yeah.
I think he was like, oh, good lord.
Something along those lines.
Like, what the fuck are you doing?
brendan schaub
I feel like it'd be so interesting.
Don't get me wrong.
Complete murder.
But I feel like it'd be so interesting if you went down that route.
Like, what have you been up to?
Football days.
How the fuck did we get here?
joe rogan
Don't say this.
Give it away.
How do I do it?
You warm them up.
brendan schaub
You warm them up.
Hey, tell us how great you were at football.
joe rogan
And is that what you do?
brendan schaub
Oh, yeah.
joe rogan
Maybe you can get them on the fire with a kid.
brendan schaub
I don't know if that's platform for him.
joe rogan
Listen, Callan would be the perfect guest to talk to him.
Callan would definitely not interrupt him and start talking about stories that he played football.
brendan schaub
Or tell him about the tie.
joe rogan
That would be perfect.
Actually, Callan and him together would be really interesting.
I would like to actually see that.
brendan schaub
Callan make him feel good to compliment him, you know?
Callan could be the perfect one and I get in.
unidentified
So tell him.
joe rogan
Don't say what you would do.
You never know, man.
brendan schaub
He might go on a podcast marketing thing.
joe rogan
He might write a book, bro.
brendan schaub
He's definitely writing a book.
Is it poor taste if I drive around Brentwood in a brand new white Yeah.
No, really?
joe rogan
For Halloween, for sure.
brendan schaub
And paint my face black?
joe rogan
Yeah, if you have like a bloody knife.
If I go blackface and buy a bloody knife, attach a seatbelt, clanging around on the ground as you're driving by.
brendan schaub
And my girl wears a blonde wig in the back?
That's poor taste.
See, I'm not going that far.
I just want a dope-ass brand new Ford Bronco in white.
joe rogan
The new ones are pretty sick looking.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
I hope they do a good job with it.
brendan schaub
Have you seen them?
joe rogan
I've seen some, what do they call those things?
brendan schaub
Prototypes?
Prototypes?
Me too, that's all I've seen.
joe rogan
What do they call them?
They don't call it a prototype.
unidentified
What's that word they use?
brendan schaub
Don't they call it tester?
joe rogan
What is the word they use?
Concept vehicle.
Concept vehicle.
brendan schaub
But they look like the Raptor.
joe rogan
Well, that's a smart move.
The Raptor's pretty dope.
brendan schaub
So sick.
joe rogan
Look at it.
Ooh, slick.
brendan schaub
See, imagine me, that white.
joe rogan
Ooh, I do like that.
brendan schaub
Right?
joe rogan
Ooh, they're doing a four-door?
unidentified
Yes.
joe rogan
Computer rendering, though.
Oh, okay.
unidentified
It's not real.
brendan schaub
It's supposed to come out in 2018, though.
Early 2018. See that Cadillac right there?
joe rogan
That's a goddamn badass car, too.
America's making some kick-ass cars now.
See that Cadillac right there?
brendan schaub
Yeah, that thing's sick.
That is a fucking...
unidentified
Beast!
You know what, though?
brendan schaub
They're cool until you go from a Porsche or a Bentley and jump in a Cadillac, you go, all right, kind of basic.
unidentified
Yeah.
brendan schaub
The interiors are basic.
joe rogan
You're spoiled.
unidentified
Spoiled.
brendan schaub
I know.
The Germans.
joe rogan
Spoiled little baby.
brendan schaub
I know.
joe rogan
They got you.
brendan schaub
They got me.
joe rogan
It's true, right?
There's no American equivalent to, like, a Mercedes S-Class.
They just don't quite get there.
brendan schaub
We just, we're not there.
joe rogan
It's not weird.
Like, why don't they get there?
Like, why doesn't someone just dig in and go, let's just throw our fucking dick into this hat?
brendan schaub
Let's just get our dicks into the dirt here.
joe rogan
Yeah, just build some beast of a fucking car.
brendan schaub
Like, what's the best American car?
Lincoln?
Like, you get a Lincoln...
joe rogan
No, because no one cares.
No one cares.
brendan schaub
They're just for the older crowd, aren't they?
joe rogan
Yeah, you show up at a Lincoln Navigator.
brendan schaub
Oh, fuck you.
Get out of here.
What are you from, 94?
joe rogan
It's not a bad car.
The new ones are actually pretty nice.
brendan schaub
I know, they're actually nice.
joe rogan
But the point is, it's not a Mercedes.
It's just not.
brendan schaub
What American car can you pull up and shit on people?
unidentified
Nothing.
brendan schaub
Where it's comfy?
joe rogan
Nothing.
brendan schaub
Eldorado.
joe rogan
Now that they don't have a Viper, you can't even pull up in a sports car.
No, the demon.
jamie vernon
I typed an American muscle car in it.
joe rogan
Oh, but it's a muscle car.
brendan schaub
A luxury car they still kick ass.
I'm talking luxury car.
joe rogan
Well, they have the market cornered when it comes to muscle cars.
When it comes to a stupid car with a giant engine that makes a ton of noise.
brendan schaub
Oh, we're killing it.
joe rogan
And it uses a manual transmission.
America.
unidentified
America.
brendan schaub
All day.
joe rogan
They still make the Corvette Z06 in a fucking manual.
It's one of the few cars.
The Germans are the only ones in the Porsche.
Porsche's the only ones that have had the balls to bring a manual back after they took it away.
Ferrari still hasn't figured it out yet.
brendan schaub
They refuse to.
joe rogan
Well, because douchebags who buy Ferraris are all just trying to floss.
Most of them don't even know how to drive one.
brendan schaub
Yeah, it's not real.
It's not a track car.
Dude, have you seen that Porsche Turbo you can buy?
It's like the Platinum Edition.
The wheels are made out of carbon fiber.
It's gold.
It's like a dark, not a Scrooge McDuck gold coin, but it's like a gold color.
Bring that shit up, Jamie.
It's this special Porsche Turbo Platinum Edition.
joe rogan
Platinum Edition Turbo, but it's in gold.
brendan schaub
And then it has black rims that are carbon fiber.
joe rogan
Why is it Platinum Edition, but it's in gold?
Shouldn't it be in Platinum?
brendan schaub
Yeah, it should be Platinum.
I don't know.
I think it's Platinum Edition.
joe rogan
Remember when Justin Bieber had that chrome Fisker?
brendan schaub
Dude, I'm a Fisker fan.
I saw one the other day, I thought...
joe rogan
It's a dope ride.
brendan schaub
It's dope.
Look, and they catch on fire.
There it is!
My bad.
Exclusive series.
joe rogan
Look at that thing.
brendan schaub
Joe, buy this.
joe rogan
God.
brendan schaub
Buy this.
That's your next ride.
joe rogan
Look at that thing.
brendan schaub
They're tough to get, too.
joe rogan
Are they?
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Well, I don't want it.
unidentified
Well...
joe rogan
Because those tough-to-get ones, they're like $50,000 over sticker.
brendan schaub
No, we'll figure it out.
joe rogan
Fuck off.
brendan schaub
No, we'll figure it out.
joe rogan
I'm not driving a gold car, bro.
brendan schaub
Bro, that's not gold.
joe rogan
What color is it, then?
The Platinum Edition.
You were right.
brendan schaub
The Platinum Edition, but it adds another $66,000 onto your tag.
joe rogan
Exclusive series is fast, luxurious, and delightfully gold.
Beautiful special edition will be limited to 500 units worldwide.
Hey, guess what?
When you make something cool, make a bunch of them, you assholes.
People are going to buy them.
Make an exclusive.
unidentified
If everyone can have it, I don't want it.
brendan schaub
Look at that fucking thing.
unidentified
It's nasty.
joe rogan
Look at that zero to 60 time, 2.8 seconds.
That seems excessive.
How's it going to get shorter than that?
You're not even three seconds, you're going 60 miles an hour.
brendan schaub
Because with those new rims that are all carbon fiber.
joe rogan
They are dope!
brendan schaub
How sick is that?
joe rogan
Those rims are dope.
I was skeptical at first.
Those rims are killer.
I like the black stripes too.
Yeah, it's a nice car.
But you know what?
A lot of people don't like the way 911 turbos look.
brendan schaub
They can't be my friend.
joe rogan
When you get into that...
brendan schaub
You cannot be my friend.
Look at that fucking car, bro.
joe rogan
It's badass.
Look at the stripes on the seats.
Ooh, that's sick.
brendan schaub
Wait, it comes with that luggage too, Jamie?
unidentified
Oh, man.
brendan schaub
Bro, I would flaunt that everywhere.
And a watch.
joe rogan
But it's like, how much does it cost?
$66,000 over?
No, no, no, no.
brendan schaub
Suggested, coupe, and then...
joe rogan
$257,000.
brendan schaub
But no, it's more than that, right?
The five-piece...
Ah, it doesn't come with the five-piece luggage.
It's another six grand.
joe rogan
Oh, you gotta buy that, bitch.
$6,324 for the luggage, sir.
brendan schaub
Worth every penny.
joe rogan
How much you get for the watch?
unidentified
Doesn't say.
brendan schaub
How dope is that thing, though?
joe rogan
It's nice.
I prefer silver.
Especially that thing.
That is a spaceship.
brendan schaub
I mean you're flexing on people if you pull up in a gold Porsche.
joe rogan
100%.
brendan schaub
With matching luggage and a watch.
joe rogan
But a dual pull up in a red Ferrari and double flex you.
brendan schaub
Not in that thing.
I feel like I've seen Ferraris.
joe rogan
Yeah.
I was in Italy, and a guy had a Ferrari in Italy.
I'm like, this motherfucker has a Ferrari in Italy.
He wins.
brendan schaub
That's pretty classy.
joe rogan
It was red, right in front of this beautiful hotel on the Amalfi Coast.
brendan schaub
I'm like, that guy's ballin'.
unidentified
Ballin'.
joe rogan
And he probably had something.
Look at that.
Jamie Foxx.
brendan schaub
Goddamn Jamie Foxx.
joe rogan
Jamie Foxx has a shiny gold Bugatti.
He wins.
brendan schaub
And a gold Rolex.
joe rogan
His wheels are fucking gold.
He wins.
Jamie Foxx wins.
brendan schaub
Yeah.
joe rogan
Go back to the...
What is the new Ferrari?
What is it?
The fuck is it called?
brendan schaub
You know what?
I'm not a Lamborghini guy.
I like Ferrari.
See, for me it goes Porsche, Ferrari, and I'm not a Lamborghini guy.
joe rogan
Yeah, Lamborghini gets a little sketchy, but I gotta say the Huracan...
brendan schaub
They yell a little.
unidentified
Yeah, they yell a little.
brendan schaub
It's just like, I'm a giant tool, check me out.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's like if you buy a Ferrari, that's a 488 special edition sun lighter with larger appetite for apexes.
That's like the race version, but that's a shitty picture.
Go to a video of Ferrari 488. Like, that is a beautiful car, man.
That's exactly what the guy had in Italy.
That is a beautiful car.
brendan schaub
That thing's ridiculous.
joe rogan
But, I'll tell you what, what looks better than that?
brendan schaub
The new Ford GT. That thing's sick.
joe rogan
That looks better than that.
That might be the American Ferrari.
brendan schaub
Oh, it's based off the Ferrari.
unidentified
Yeah.
brendan schaub
They copied the Ferrari.
joe rogan
Look at that thing.
Go full screen, Jamie.
brendan schaub
I'll take the Ferrari over that Ford.
joe rogan
Look at the hips on that bitch.
brendan schaub
That thing is...
unidentified
Ooh!
joe rogan
Jamie, do you get this stuff?
Does this do anything for you?
unidentified
Nah.
joe rogan
You're boring.
brendan schaub
How dare you?
unidentified
Shut your mouth.
brendan schaub
You're not a fan, Jamie?
joe rogan
You pause too hard.
I don't like these velvet ropes around this stupid thing.
unidentified
Me neither.
brendan schaub
Let me fucking get my paws wet.
joe rogan
Is this a club with a bottle service, or is this a goddamn car?
brendan schaub
Because I don't see any fucking drinks around here.
joe rogan
Yeah, where's the car?
brendan schaub
Let me get my hands on it.
That thing's filthy.
joe rogan
It's a beast.
You know what they are?
Here's the thing.
They're goddamn gorgeous.
They sound incredible.
brendan schaub
I agree.
joe rogan
But they're going to probably break.
brendan schaub
Yeah, you're going to have some problems with them.
With a Porsche, you never have problems, really.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's like the difference between a girl who does CrossFit, and she's got thick ass and big legs, and her shoulders are a little stacked, and she looks great in a dress, versus a girl who's like a model who's going to turn an ankle if she goes to the beach.
brendan schaub
I thought you were going a different route with that.
I thought you were going to say the CrossFit girl is going to eventually break down because CrossFit's some dangerous shit.
joe rogan
No, the CrossFit girl is the Viper.
That's the Viper ACR. Bury that fucking shitty Ferrari.
You get that new Viper?
That thing breaks racecourses everywhere.
brendan schaub
That thing's gnarly.
joe rogan
It's burying that Ferrari.
Fuck you!
America!
As it drives by, it sticks his finger out the window and a Kid Rock song plays.
I mean, that is not even close.
It's gonna kill the Ferrari.
But the Ferrari's like sexier looking.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
Like it's got perfect features.
brendan schaub
Yes.
joe rogan
It's got amazing lips.
brendan schaub
But when shit goes wrong, it goes wrong.
joe rogan
And when it gets down to fucking, you're gonna want that CrossFit girl.
brendan schaub
Yeah, you are.
joe rogan
You're gonna want that girl who can push her way through a spin class.
brendan schaub
As the mental toughness just keep on, keep on.
Do a 90 minute cross or yoga class.
joe rogan
Yeah, you don't want a girl who's got like perfect genes, but she's lazy.
brendan schaub
No, hell no!
joe rogan
And she just takes Adderall for a few days before her big shoots and doesn't eat.
Look at that thing.
That's a Ford GT. That's a gross color though.
I saw one in a sick blue color.
It looked amazing.
brendan schaub
That's like a Ford Taurus color.
Fuck you.
joe rogan
Look at the body on that thing though.
brendan schaub
I'm out.
I'm out.
joe rogan
Yeah, find a better color, Jamie.
Fuck off with this color.
brendan schaub
Those headlights aren't doing anything for me, either.
joe rogan
We gotta see it at a better angle.
brendan schaub
Give me the blue and white, for God's sake.
It's America, for fuck's sake.
Jesus.
Goddammit.
joe rogan
Well, I'm not a fan of red with white.
Red with white stripes?
brendan schaub
I don't think it's good.
joe rogan
I like red with black stripes.
brendan schaub
Me too.
joe rogan
That looks badass.
brendan schaub
I like blue with white.
joe rogan
Ooh, that's right.
brendan schaub
I like what you think.
That's America.
joe rogan
I like what you think, America.
unidentified
America.
joe rogan
Ooh, what you got here for us, Jamie?
Oh, look at this!
unidentified
Ooh!
brendan schaub
Duh!
joe rogan
Oh, you nailed it, Jamie.
Black with red stripes?
That might be...
Look at that!
unidentified
Damn, son!
joe rogan
Jesus Christ!
Look where the exhaust pipes come out of the back like that.
unidentified
That...
joe rogan
That might be the best-looking car.
brendan schaub
Fuck, I gotta agree.
That thing is sick!
joe rogan
That might be the best-looking car ever.
brendan schaub
Those giant Brembo brakes in the front?
joe rogan
Okay, listen, Ford.
Give me one of these, you fucks!
Give me a manual!
brendan schaub
They're not making it.
They're hard to get, right?
Double clutch, too.
joe rogan
Yeah, but it's also a double clutch.
Come on, Ford.
You know Jay Leno's probably got six of them that fuck.
brendan schaub
Yeah, there's like 50 of them.
Jay Leno takes 10. Jay Seinfeld takes 20 of them.
And we're all fucked.
joe rogan
LeBron James has got one.
brendan schaub
Yeah, LeBron James might want to jump in one.
joe rogan
For every house.
brendan schaub
And then Kevin Hart jumps in, though.
joe rogan
Yeah, Kevin Hart's got one made out of gold.
unidentified
Damn, that thing is sick.
joe rogan
Look at that thing, though.
Holy shit.
That's the perfect color, Jamie.
You nailed it.
brendan schaub
Yeah, you've hit it right on the head, John.
joe rogan
Black with red stripes.
I never knew black with red stripes looked so badass.
brendan schaub
And with the lights in the back.
joe rogan
That's amazing looking.
It sounds so good.
There's a lot of people right now mad at us.
brendan schaub
Yeah, they piss.
joe rogan
Yeah, they're talking cars again, bro.
Hey, we gave you three hours of dicks and what else are we talking about?
brendan schaub
Nate Diaz drama.
joe rogan
Nate Diaz.
The Conor McGregor fight.
brendan schaub
How about we went over Mars attacks in depth?
joe rogan
Oh, that's right.
Don't get mad at us because we like cars.
We talk about the shit we like about.
I really enjoy automotive engineering.
unidentified
Ugh.
joe rogan
We could bring this home.
Let's bring this bitch home.
This weekend, folks, Fight Companion returns.
Saturday night, Stefan Skysstraper-Skroove versus Alexander Volkov, right?
That's his name?
brendan schaub
That's right.
And I'm in Cobb's Comedy Club September 14th.
And then I'm in Long Beach Laugh Factory, Long Beach September 22nd.
tfatk.com for tickets.
And we're at the Comedy Store tomorrow night.
joe rogan
That's right.
I'm with you and Kalia.
Oh, Jesus!
What a lineup!
It's probably sold out.
And Sam Tripoli.
Sam Tripoli's show.
brendan schaub
That's right!
joe rogan
It might be sold out already.
But if it's not, go online.
It's on the Comedy Store's website.
brendan schaub
It's on my Instagram.
joe rogan
It's on my Instagram.
Alright.
Love you guys.
unidentified
Bye.
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