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July 12, 2017 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:53:03
Joe Rogan Experience #986 - Maynard James Keenan
Participants
Main voices
j
joe rogan
01:22:57
m
maynard james keenan
01:20:43
Appearances
j
jamie vernon
01:15
Clips
d
donald cerrone
00:09
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Speaker Time Text
unidentified
What's it called again?
joe rogan
What's the gym called?
maynard james keenan
Verde Valley Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
joe rogan
So Verde Valley BJJ. And what town is that in?
maynard james keenan
Old Town Cottonwood in Arizona.
joe rogan
So you essentially invested and built a gym out there so you'd have a place to train.
maynard james keenan
Basically, yeah.
joe rogan
That's such a smart move.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
It's kind of what you have to do, right?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Otherwise, you'd have to drive hours to go somewhere.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I mean, there's megatons down south.
There's a bunch of places down there, but it's a two-hour drive.
There's also Ted Osborne.
Osborne Jiu-Jitsu has an academy there.
joe rogan
When you decide where you're going to live, when you decide where you're going to decide to spend all your time, Like, do you ever go, what the fuck am I doing in the middle of nowhere in Arizona?
maynard james keenan
I'm maintaining peace of mind and I remind myself of that right away.
joe rogan
So that's like essential.
It's planned out in the sense.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Just that that isolation a little bit just to be able to unplug and reset.
I think just my introvert nature.
I need that time.
I need that.
I need that introspection.
I need that moment.
joe rogan
Yeah, because for you, you are kind of an introvert, but you're also kind of an extrovert.
I mean, you're the lead singer of Tool.
I mean, it's not like, I mean, you can only be so introverted and do what you do, so you have to kind of like fluctuate.
maynard james keenan
It's a balance, but I need to recharge.
I need to unplug and go back and recharge, and then I can go back out and do that.
joe rogan
A lot of people never figure that out, right?
They just kind of burn.
maynard james keenan
They burn the fuck out.
joe rogan
Yeah.
How'd you figure out to not do that?
maynard james keenan
First couple years of being in LA, I realized it was just such an energy sap I needed to actually literally go someplace where there were very few people.
joe rogan
Yeah, that's the move, right?
God, I always keep thinking I should do that.
Every time I go to some small town, I'm like, this is probably the way to live.
Just like know the people around you, live around a few thousand people, you know, have a grocery store.
maynard james keenan
That can backfire too.
joe rogan
Oh, totally.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, small town drama, big town drama, it ends up being the same thing, but you actually, it's not a stranger yelling at you, it's your neighbor.
joe rogan
Well, I think the small town drama is better if there's a college in town for some reason.
Right?
Like those places like Boulder or there's a bunch of cities like that.
Like Bozeman, Montana is a good example.
There's these places that are like, they're not big, but the university somehow or another balances out the intellectual vibe of the town.
maynard james keenan
I could see that.
Yeah, like Boulder.
joe rogan
Yeah.
I wonder what Boulder's like now in the height and fury of social justice warrior, online activism.
I wonder if Boulder's gotten weird.
I haven't been back in a while.
Because every place has kind of ramped up that shit over the last few years.
maynard james keenan
You get me okay on this?
joe rogan
Dude, you sound beautiful.
maynard james keenan
Can you hear me okay, Conor?
joe rogan
He's got Conor McGregor standing right in front of him for advice.
So if anything goes south...
Conor doesn't have his fuck you pinstripe suit on, though.
maynard james keenan
He's got his fuck you attitude in his fists right now.
joe rogan
Did you see the press conference?
maynard james keenan
No, that's one of those...
I was trying to find...
What's the edit to watch that thing rather than this?
There's so much streaming going on, I had no idea what I was looking for.
joe rogan
Yeah, the best...
All you want to see is Connor talking.
And a little bit of Floyd Mayweather responding, but Connor talking.
There's Dana White's video feed.
You can watch it on...
We can put it up right now.
You want to listen to it?
maynard james keenan
Why not?
joe rogan
Go to Dana White's Instagram profile.
And then once you go to his Instagram profile, go to the video that's playing in his YouTube.
There's like a link like on his Instagram page.
Connor's hilarious, man.
He's fucking hilarious.
And he was laughing and having a great time and Floyd seemed like, he seemed a little rattled by like how confident this guy is when they were going face to face and standing off with each other.
Yeah, give me some volume when they get face to face.
Yeah, go back to that.
Listen to him talk some shit.
No, go before that.
Go before that.
There you go, right there, right there.
there is good.
unidentified
He can't even afford to see you anymore.
He is fucked.
There's no other way about it.
His little legs, his little core, his little head.
I'm gonna knock him out inside four rounds, mark my words.
Wait till they get in front of each other and they start John.
It's a flagger.
An Argus McGregor line, I've got my own line of suits coming out.
joe rogan
If you zoom in on the pinstriper, he says, fuck you.
unidentified
Look, let's get this world towards the earth.
Let's have fun.
Thank you so much, everybody.
I appreciate it.
Now watch when him and Floyd Mayweather get in front of each other.
joe rogan
So scoot ahead to when him and Floyd, because Floyd gets up and says a bunch of shit, and a bunch of other people say a bunch of shit.
Floyd looked really stupid.
Back up a little bit, because you see Floyd hold up his check for $100 million.
unidentified
Look at it.
joe rogan
Back it up.
Back it up.
unidentified
Let me show you motherfuckers what a hundred million dollar fighter look like.
Still got a hundred million and then he never touched this shit.
That's it a tax man.
You're right.
I'm the IRS and I'm gonna tax your ass.
I gotta do shit.
Did they shut your mic off?
joe rogan
They shut his mic off after a while.
unidentified
Did they shut your mic off?
joe rogan
And I'm guaranteeing you this.
unidentified
You going out on your face or you going out on your back?
joe rogan
Now which way you wanna go?
Which way you wanna go?
unidentified
That's right.
Sit quiet, you little bitch.
joe rogan
You're not even gonna kill me.
unidentified
You're not even gonna kill me.
joe rogan
They won't let him use the mic.
unidentified
All you gotta do is show up.
You just show up, okay?
joe rogan
And I'm gonna do the rest.
unidentified
I'm here right now.
You just show up and I'm gonna do the rest.
joe rogan
I'm here right now.
You can get it right now.
Keep kidding right now.
unidentified
Hey, no, we got to pose the fighters now face to face.
Watch this.
Watch all melt.
Selling tickets.
That's what I do.
One shot is gonna text me.
Anywhere on the dome.
Anywhere on the dome.
Keep your gloves up, too.
I'd break the guard.
My shots break the guard.
- All right, all right.
I get nervous.
Yeah, you got it.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, well, you ain't enough nobody at all.
Little fists, little fists.
Do your hands hurt?
Do they hurt more in the cold?
Do your hands hurt?
joe rogan
- All right, boys.
unidentified
All right, boys. All right, boys. Just check it out. - All right, boys. - Just check it out. - All right, boys. - Just check it out. - All right, boys. - Just check it out. - All right, boys. - Just check it out. - All right, boys. - Just check it out. - All right, boys.
If this is a real fight, you're dead already.
joe rogan
This is amazing.
Do your hands hurt when it gets cold?
Because Floyd's had a bunch of hand surgeries.
He goes, you got brittle hands.
Do your hands hurt when it gets cold?
Do they hurt when it's cold?
maynard james keenan
I don't know enough about boxing to have any clue.
All I can look at from a distance is Floyd's older, he's slightly smaller, He's also the greatest defensive boxer of all time.
joe rogan
Like, literally of all time.
maynard james keenan
And Michael Jordan was arguably one of the best basketball players, but put him back in the game today.
joe rogan
Yeah, but Floyd hasn't been out for that long.
He's still relevant.
I mean, it's only been a couple of years.
I think it was two years since his last fight.
Against Andre Berto, was it?
Two years?
unidentified
Right.
joe rogan
And then before that, the Pacquiao fight, you know, look, he's definitely not in his prime.
maynard james keenan
So, yeah, I'm saying, you know, so that was my first look.
That's what you look at and you go, age, reach, all that stuff, size, watching what happened to McGregor up against Diaz, having that, wasn't really ready for that larger dude to hit him.
Yeah.
Is that the equation?
But then, you know, McGregor's no joke, so he's, you know...
But can he handle a guy who's done this a hundred times?
joe rogan
He's done it more than a hundred times.
I mean, Floyd grew up doing it.
The thing about Floyd is I think you have an idea of what you can do to him until you get inside the ring with him, and then you realize how good he is.
His defense is just on another level.
He's just in a completely different zone all by himself.
His movement, the way he's able to figure out what you're going to do, the way he processes your movement, throws it into his boxing computer, and then before you know, and he's catching you before you even know what you're doing.
He's just a wizard, man, when it comes to boxing.
The thing is, Conor is a way bigger guy.
He's younger.
He's way stronger.
I mean, physically stronger, not just in terms of, like, punching power.
He's way stronger with punching power, but he's also, like, stronger physically.
Like, if he gets a hold of Floyd and starts manipulating him...
I'm very curious to see what...
Like, his trainer, Jon Kavanaugh, is a very, very smart guy.
I know he's also worked with Pauli Malignaggi, who's a world champion and one of the best boxing commentators in the business.
He's helping Connor.
It's gonna be interesting.
You know, on paper, you'd have to say Floyd has a massive advantage, but all this shit-talking wears on a man.
That's a different kind of shit-talking than Floyd's ever experienced.
maynard james keenan
He hasn't had that.
joe rogan
He's got a guy telling him, I can kill you.
Easy.
He's like, got a guy telling you, if this is a real fight, you're dead.
You're dead in 20. He knows he's right.
He knows he's right.
Floyd fucking knows it.
unidentified
If Floyd, he lets his ego get crazy, let's have an MMA match!
joe rogan
Let's go ahead and have an MMA match!
maynard james keenan
Right, then he's dead.
joe rogan
That's it.
He's a dead man.
maynard james keenan
He's a dead man.
jamie vernon
He'd fight him in the octagon and with four-ounce gloves, too.
joe rogan
Yeah, he said that.
He's ridiculous.
Let him use elbows.
Give him one more weapon and you're fucked.
You tie up and you want to do this and over the top comes an elbow and your fucking legs give out onto you.
Give him one more weapon.
Give him knees.
Knees or leg kicks.
It's crazy.
maynard james keenan
I just think, Connor, I just think you need to calm down a little bit and give him some space.
joe rogan
It's beautiful.
Don't give him any space.
maynard james keenan
Just give him a little bit of space.
Shut up, Joe.
Give him a little space.
Just give him a little space, Joe.
joe rogan
That is the guy who makes those, the bad motherfucker.
unidentified
How do you pronounce his name?
jamie vernon
Plasticcell or Plasticcell?
joe rogan
No, but the gentleman who makes it.
jamie vernon
Oh, Fong Tran, I believe.
joe rogan
Yeah, he's a bad motherfucker.
maynard james keenan
Pretty amazing.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's crazy, right?
So accurate.
The Biggie, you've seen the Biggie?
Where's Biggie?
Oh, we had to move him.
We were doing something here.
Look at the Biggie one.
maynard james keenan
Oh, yeah.
joe rogan
And the Tupac one.
Guy's a wizard, man.
maynard james keenan
Who's this?
joe rogan
That's my bitch.
unidentified
Who's that?
joe rogan
That's me.
Who's that guy?
But look, it's a spectacle, you know?
What happens, happens.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
I hope Kana goes back.
maynard james keenan
This is what it's all about.
joe rogan
Oh, yeah.
maynard james keenan
Doesn't that, like, whatever happens in the ring, yeah, whatever.
joe rogan
That's gonna sell.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
It's gonna sell.
They're gonna charge a hundred bucks for pay-per-view.
maynard james keenan
Charge who?
joe rogan
You're not gonna pay?
You're gonna pay.
How dare you?
Everyone listening is paying.
If you got a hundred bucks, you're gonna, fuck it.
Have ten people over, it's ten bucks.
You wouldn't pay ten bucks to see that?
You're out of your fucking mind.
maynard james keenan
Actually, my screen, the screen at my house is so awesome that it's actually, it's worth, like, I have to, I have to, literally, I have to pay a thousand dollars to watch it, so if you want to come over, it's a hundred bucks.
joe rogan
You have to pay a thousand dollars to watch?
What do you mean?
Oh, he's got a thing.
I see what he's doing.
Yeah.
Do you have like one of those 100-inch LED or LCD? What is it?
LED or LCD? LED now.
LED now, right?
I saw one at the store the other day at Best Buy.
They had like a 100-inch TV. Like, that is fucking crazy.
You're looking at that thing.
It's almost too good.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
unidentified
No, no.
maynard james keenan
Don't do that.
joe rogan
Are you filming a lot of shit?
unidentified
Are you doing it in 4K? I don't know.
maynard james keenan
You mean all the video stuff we do?
joe rogan
Yeah, yeah.
maynard james keenan
When the RED camera first came out, we had some friends that were using that, then they were using the Canon for a while, just filming on, and I don't know what they're filming on, I just know that over the last...
Five years?
Just insane.
Just jump in technology for filming.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
It's been amazing.
Not having to have, like, dude with, like, lights and some guy on a dolly.
No, it's like, the guy's a small...
joe rogan
Tiny little thing.
maynard james keenan
Tiny thing doing insane, insane work.
joe rogan
They have trail cams now that are in 4K. So like when they're looking for animals in the woods, they put these cameras up on trails and they capture, motion capture, and they take video.
4K video.
And it's fucking amazing.
Low light video.
And they show the difference.
There was something I was looking at yesterday.
It showed the difference between state-of-the-art two years ago versus state-of-the-art today in the exact same location, exact same time.
It's crazy.
Like, you can see everything crystal clear.
It's HD video from a tree.
A little box tied to a tree.
I mean, it looks like a fucking movie.
maynard james keenan
That's pretty awesome.
joe rogan
Dude, you're missing out on that, hiding out in the middle of nowhere in Arizona.
Not really, though.
That's the thing.
It's not like when you're hiding out there, you're still connected.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
We just finished our two greenhouses.
We're planting them this next week, so we've got full-on greenhouses on one of the sites.
joe rogan
Are you totally off the grid?
maynard james keenan
Not off the grid, no.
But I mean, that would be nice.
I think that's the goal.
joe rogan
I feel like you can be, right?
With solar.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
And I've waited on solar just to see, again, if cameras were what they were two years ago to today, how are the solar panels catching up?
Because I know that that technology is insane now.
joe rogan
Do you know what Elon Musk is doing?
He's making solar-powered roof tiles.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
So your whole roof is like a giant solar generator, which totally makes sense.
maynard james keenan
And those things are great.
So I'm the kind of guy that waits a minute.
I want to see, okay, once he's put those in place...
How do they do against hail?
How do they do against sun?
joe rogan
That's a good point.
maynard james keenan
I want to see how those things last because I'm not going to invest all that money in roof tiles if all of a sudden they find in a year that they crack under Arizona sunshine.
joe rogan
You get crazy storms in Arizona.
Do you near the place where they get typhoons?
Is it typhoons or monsoons?
maynard james keenan
Monsoons.
Yeah, we get monsoons.
We just started seeing evidence.
Like yesterday we got hail and like a little dabble of monsoon yesterday.
joe rogan
Yeah, like sometimes, people think of Arizona as the thing of the desert.
unidentified
Right.
joe rogan
But there's a lot of different terrain in Arizona.
maynard james keenan
Yes, yes.
joe rogan
And you guys, when it rains, you guys get fucking pounded on, right?
What is this, Jamie?
jamie vernon
It's the hail test for the Tesla roof tiles.
joe rogan
Oh, so they did the test.
jamie vernon
They also have a lifetime warranty on them.
joe rogan
Boom!
Oh, it took it like a champ.
And what are those other two bitch ass tiles?
maynard james keenan
The ones that didn't work?
jamie vernon
Yeah, the regular...
joe rogan
Traditional roof tiles.
Oh, they're regular roof tiles.
So the Tesla panels are fucking better, bitch!
jamie vernon
100 mile an hour impact.
joe rogan
Wow.
jamie vernon
Okay.
Not bad.
maynard james keenan
Well, then there you have it.
I'm in.
Yeah.
Because that's what I've been waiting for, to see if they can get this, that technology up.
joe rogan
I'm just waiting for Elon Musk to run the world.
I'm like, dude, you're on point.
Keep it up.
Yeah.
Just make roof tiles and cars and just keep it up.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, being, you know, I don't know that being completely off the grid is, I think it's an option for some people.
There's just too many people for you to be actually, you know, completely unplug and be isolated.
joe rogan
Yeah, I don't want to be isolated.
maynard james keenan
Communes don't, you know, that doesn't work.
There's got to be trade.
joe rogan
Communes turn into a big fuckfest, right?
It's like the one that you'd be like the cult leader and you just want to bang everybody's wife.
maynard james keenan
I don't know from experience that you're aware of, but no.
Yes.
joe rogan
Yes, it is what happens, right?
No, see, I think that off the grid, in terms of non-reliance, but connectivity in terms of being able to figure out what's going on in the world.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, that's a reasonable goal.
But I think even being off the grid, I feel like you can get to a certain point in today's society where you can be unplugged from your power and your water.
But somebody's going to come for your water.
There's various places around the United States where they come after you for growing your own food on your land.
joe rogan
Do they really?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, there's weird stuff everywhere like that.
joe rogan
What kind of regulations do they have against growing food?
maynard james keenan
They would probably justify it in terms of your house is zoned residential, not cultural.
joe rogan
Oh, not agriculture.
maynard james keenan
Or you're not allowed to use the city water to water your garden.
joe rogan
I've actually heard this before.
I've heard people get in trouble with that before.
maynard james keenan
It's just another level of...
Government control.
joe rogan
Do you think they're doing that?
It's just like a mistake in the...
maynard james keenan
And I'm not that paranoid guy.
joe rogan
No, you're not.
You're not a prepper, right?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I'm a prepper, but not in that...
joe rogan
Alex Jones sort of way.
maynard james keenan
No, I'm not that bananas.
I think just being prepared and understanding that eventually there'd be an interruption in the water that comes to you and the food that gets to you.
Just understanding how to grow food is not being a prepper.
joe rogan
No, it's wise.
It's like having a lot of boxes checked off.
And also, doesn't it feel good?
Like, I'm sure...
I know that you love your wine.
I mean, it's got to feel good when you have a glass of the wine that you've grown and created and worked so hard on, and just established this perfect time of keeping it in the barrels.
And, you know, I'm sure there's got to be, like, massive satisfaction to that.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, absolutely.
Because, you know, it spirals out into all these other areas of understanding, again, how to grow your own food.
You start talking to and communicating with people that you wouldn't normally talk to.
Like, a Republican guy is not talking to the liberal Democrat guy and the...
And this religion is talking to that religion.
And, you know, there's all these economic, religious, political lines that get blurred because in that moment talking about growing a thing and sustaining a local community, a lot of those things tend to go away.
Just turn this thing off and get back to understanding what it's going to take to make these exchanges and do these activities.
You start to really...
Feel connected with people rather than this weird divisive crap that goes on in the world today.
joe rogan
Yeah, I think there's definitely like we need to figure out how to spend more time just having regular normal day-to-day conversations because it seems to me like people are worse at it than they ever been before.
People interrupt people more.
They're not good at like listening and talking because I think people are so accustomed to communicating with people through devices.
It's almost like we're rusty.
We're rusty on how we talk to people because we don't do it that much.
How often do you call someone on the phone?
maynard james keenan
Not that often.
joe rogan
You and I have maybe never had a phone call, maybe one phone conversation.
It's always text.
And kind of all my friends.
If someone calls me up, it's like, what's everything okay?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Like, what's wrong?
You know?
maynard james keenan
I don't use that thing for talking to somebody.
I don't use this to talk to people because the technology to me still isn't where it should be because I'll be in the middle of making a point with somebody and the phone call will drop and we have to start over.
joe rogan
And so you get mad?
maynard james keenan
I get mad because, yeah, so I just, that's why I usually text or email because I can get the whole thought down.
And then, and if we want to talk about summing up some details on it, I'll say, I'll call you from a landline.
So I'll actually call people from, I'll find a landline.
joe rogan
A landline.
maynard james keenan
You know, have you heard of those?
joe rogan
They don't even have them anymore.
maynard james keenan
They're right around.
joe rogan
They're illegal.
maynard james keenan
Right around the same time as the cassette.
joe rogan
Yeah, I send a raven.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
That's what I do.
I got some dope ravens.
They're super smart.
You just gotta leave, like, pineapple on the end.
That's what they like.
They go right to the pineapple, take their little message.
What's up?
jamie vernon
See this today?
joe rogan
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Scientists make teleportation breakthrough?
jamie vernon
Yeah, they, uh...
joe rogan
But that's in the New York Post.
They also did an article about how Travis Brown and Ronda Rousey are fading losers.
Like, it was the most ruthless article.
It's a great argument for not living in a condensed population.
Some of the articles in New York tabloid papers, they're so fucking mean!
There's something about being in an island like Manhattan where everybody's stuffed in there, where people just get super shitty with each other and they find it okay to do so.
So what is this teleportation thing?
jamie vernon
It's saying that they teleported a photon from Earth to space, like 50 miles into space.
That's not exactly what happened.
They transported the information of the proton, which is also equally important because they can send data.
maynard james keenan
They set a fax to somebody.
jamie vernon
Yeah, basically, in space.
Wow.
unidentified
From Earth.
maynard james keenan
All right.
joe rogan
Wow.
jamie vernon
Let's see, there's MIT saying it.
joe rogan
So in sending a photon, is that like one step to sending?
jamie vernon
Yeah, it's like the first step to sending.
It made a carbon copy of it.
It's virtually identical.
It's like an identical twin of it.
maynard james keenan
So it could be that that, you know, those kind of newspapers are very similar to what we're seeing with Facebook as far as the immediate feedback.
And then they adjust the article and adjust the headline.
Right.
To not only make money from clicks, but also to manipulate what you're thinking about a particular subject so they can adjust your vote, adjust your purchasing patterns, those kind of things.
So, you know, these clickbait things.
There could have been a word in that title that they know people like you love to see.
So they got you clicking on it, even though there might be nothing in the article.
joe rogan
Yeah, you see a lot of that, right?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
You see purposely deceptive article headings.
So they rope you in.
You're like, what?
What are they doing?
But even doing that, what happens to the original photon?
The original photon remains present in the original location?
jamie vernon
Yeah, it's a first step into some quantum physics type deal, proving that it can actually happen, versus just being a theory.
As far as I understood.
I listened to a one-minute video.
maynard james keenan
I need to talk to my buddy about this.
Are you buying any of this?
joe rogan
Fuck all that!
Fuck all that!
Anywhere in the dome!
Anywhere in the dome!
One punch and you're fucked, son!
maynard james keenan
You and your proton.
joe rogan
One fucked and you're fucking proton!
Yeah, I don't understand what they're saying.
So does that mean like one day they'll have a Jamie Vernon on a space holodeck in Arizona and they'll zoom you up to space, but then you'll still be here?
jamie vernon
It's hard to say.
I don't think that that's what they're doing with it.
I think this means more like they can send them packets of information without needing fiber or Wi-Fi or anything like that.
I think that's the first possible use of it.
joe rogan
I think it's a matter of time before we start duplicating things that we shouldn't be duplicating.
You know, like, whole human beings.
Like, how many deranged monarchs are gonna get a hold of this, like, way before anybody else?
These trillionaire dudes, and they're gonna spend a shit-ton of money to have copies of them.
And just make a bunch of them.
maynard james keenan
What if it's just Heath Ledger's the Joker who's actually putting this out and he's figured out a way to get all of those billionaire people to jump on the spaceship that goes nowhere.
And he's giggling somewhere.
joe rogan
See, I always feel like we're always one invention that we don't see coming away from ruining everything.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I agree.
And it could be exactly this kind of thing, this algorithmic you going down a rabbit hole in this narcissistic feedback on what you want to see, and then it tells you what you want to hear, and then it gets you to buy what you want to buy, but the thing you want to buy...
Might be this rabbit hole of leveling the playing field for everybody.
joe rogan
Yeah, it might be.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I think the only...
Is there a way out of that?
joe rogan
Doesn't seem like it.
maynard james keenan
Well, I think the only way out of it is understanding...
That the things you're being told here, this has nothing to do with mastership, if that makes sense.
joe rogan
The phone.
maynard james keenan
Just media, things you're reading on your social media pages, this has nothing to do with...
I read all those articles.
Well, that's not necessarily mastership.
That's not you going to a master who has spent all this time doing a thing or researching a thing and got his master's degree in a thing, and then you go to this class...
You take the time, the effort it takes to get to that place, and every step along the way is a new level of a revelation or some kind of epiphany of understanding of, oh, that's why we did this, and then now I can understand that.
And educate yourself.
So destroying an entire base of ignorance and knee-jerk reaction, clicking on links and being fed horseshit, It almost has to be like a conscious effort on each individual to step back and go, I hate that Trump supporter or I hate that Hillary or Bernie supporter because of the things I've been told and the things I believe have been fed back to me.
What if...
I am completely wrong about all of it.
So how do I empty my vessel, open my mind, and try to figure out, backtrack on what the truth is?
Is this person really that much different than me?
Are these people that much different?
Did they grow up with a bad, you know, bad set of poison in their system?
Did I grow up with a bad poison in my system?
I don't know.
So I don't know if there's any way out of it, because the solution I'm talking about requires a lot of introspection, self-evaluation, and a lot of...
Being more open than most people are willing to be.
joe rogan
Do you know why I think there's a way out of it?
Because a lot of people like you saying that.
I know a lot of people that are saying that now and it seems like a message that's being broadcast by a bunch of people that have gone sort of through the gauntlet of life and had a bunch of trials and tribulations and they reach this point where they kind of have an understanding of what it's taken them to get there and And a lot of people like you have this desire to relay this information and people are listening and there's a lot of other people that are saying the same thing that have also gone through their own separate trials.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
And I think it's a more prevalent message than I've ever heard in my life and I'm almost 50. I'll be 50 next month and I feel like in my life I've never...
maynard james keenan
What day?
joe rogan
August 11th.
maynard james keenan
Really?
joe rogan
Yep.
maynard james keenan
What's your birthday?
My wife's birthday is at 12?
Get the fuck out of here, bitch!
My son's birthday is the 5th.
My winemaking buddy's is the 8th.
unidentified
Crazy.
maynard james keenan
I went in and out of the army the first week of August.
joe rogan
We're basically all in the same fraternity.
maynard james keenan
Basically.
Except for me, I'm an Aries.
joe rogan
What's a girls thing?
It's not a fraternity.
What is it called?
Sorority.
Yeah, we're in the same sorority.
Oh my god, we're the same month.
Are you a Virgo?
maynard james keenan
Orange is the new Rogan.
joe rogan
OMG! Yeah, I think more people are talking about, though, man.
I think it's not going to be for everybody, but I think there's way more people that are trying to do better with their life, do better with their mind, do better with themselves.
It's a very, very common thing.
So much so there's a lot of criticisms about the various methods and people kind of losing sight.
And then there's a bunch of bullshit artists that are capitalizing on this idea as well, and they're not really doing it, but they're pretending they're doing it, and they're talking about it, but they're not really in action.
But you can kind of see.
Those guys always look a little doughy.
They're not really doing it, but they're talking about doing it.
People love talking about shit they don't really do.
Like some of my friends, they'll talk about writing comedy way more than they actually write comedy.
Judd Apatow said that.
He said, don't fucking talk about writing, just write.
I think he's right.
maynard james keenan
Nice one.
unidentified
Right?
joe rogan
I mean, isn't it the same thing?
There's a fine line between inspiring, discussing, and then sort of analyzing with people that you respect and trust and like.
And then actually doing the work.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
And I think part of it is literally working.
I think getting your hands dirty in the soil, like finding as a start, just think of it as therapy.
Whatever money you're spending on a therapist, take that time and go find a community garden and just weed.
Just go in there and plant some carrots, do something to just kind of like unplug and touch dirt and do a thing and reconnect with That cycle.
If you can reconnect with that cycle of life in some level, you start to really understand what's more important.
Some people have kids.
That helps them kind of reground themselves and redirect and focus their energies.
Some people just find gardening in that way.
But this is supposed to be a convenience.
This is just me trying to talk to you from a distance.
But as far as the information you're getting off of this thing in terms of social media, there's a lot of poison.
There's a lot of misdirect.
There's a lot of crap in there.
You have to kind of fight through it and literally...
Go eat a garden.
joe rogan
Yeah, I think you're definitely right.
I think doing that is good.
I also think doing difficult things is good.
I think that's one of the reasons why you're so drawn to jiu-jitsu.
maynard james keenan
It's the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.
It's the hardest thing.
It's the most...
I'm getting all snowflakey-weepy here.
But it's not something that you are handed.
You have to do the work to get it.
And I had so many injuries over the years and so much distance from this thing.
And I'm such a stubborn prick that I've started a thing.
I'm going to finish this thing.
So that's where I'm at with jujitsu.
And it's not something that you can be handed.
joe rogan
Well, you know someone's legit when they get a fucking hip surgery and then they're back on the mat four months later.
That is, first of all, ridiculous and not advisable, but admirable at the same time.
maynard james keenan
Right.
It took me a while to lose the...
I was gaining weight before the hip surgery because I just couldn't move as well as I wanted to, obviously.
I mean, it was completely destroyed hip.
No cushion in there.
And then the recovery was...
And then I was on the road, which is like one of the worst ways to recover from anything.
You're trying to recover from being there in the moment.
But the thing I did, finally found my rhythm.
Because I think last time we talked, I talked about how it's hard to train on the road because I've got this thing I've got to do that night.
Finding those guys, finding the black belts that understand the low-impact flow role, putting threads together, just doing simple positional drills, all those things.
Now I've been able to train with Dave and Dan Camarillo, Henry Akins, Rodrigo Havaggi comes down, Todd Fox comes down.
I've been able to train with a lot of people on the road.
joe rogan
That's amazing.
maynard james keenan
We find our hour right before soundcheck.
But it has to be people I trust.
It has to be people that have an understanding of, I'm not here to do this.
I'm here to do the singing thing.
joe rogan
This is just something that helps you get to that.
maynard james keenan
I'm just chipping away at that purple belt, trying to get to that next level.
joe rogan
Yeah, I feel like, in my opinion, drills are like one of the most important things that people don't like to do.
It's just one of those things where it's jujitsu, like rolling and sparring is so fun that people just want to get right in there.
We'll just roll light.
Let's just roll light.
And so you just kind of do it.
But the real work is done in the drilling.
maynard james keenan
If you can't do it slow, you can't do it fast, especially if you don't understand what it is you're supposed to be doing.
And if you have a good training partner, a role player, To help you and he's giving you the exact position that you're that you're trying to train If you got one of those pricks, it's like, you know bluebell purple belt guy like no I'm just gonna check I'm gonna adjust this position No, that's not what you're that's not what you're here for, right?
joe rogan
Yeah, live drills are important But yeah, like dead drills are important to where a person just you just roll just roll through the the technique with them, right?
Yeah, I mean it's like I've always found it really interesting how many people find it sort of in their life and it becomes almost like a replacement for religion in a lot of ways.
It becomes like this grounding thing for them.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I can see that.
joe rogan
Yeah, I mean, it's just, it seems like the real difficult things, whether it's jujitsu or whatever you're into, you know, I have a buddy that's into ultra marathons, that's his thing, like, it's just like pushing his body to run these crazy distances becomes like this weird sort of like centering thread in his life because he knows it's so fucking difficult that all the other things get easier.
maynard james keenan
Okay.
joe rogan
You know?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
He can run.
That's good for him.
joe rogan
Yeah, you can't do that anymore.
maynard james keenan
I'll let him do that.
joe rogan
But you said that some people can run with a hip replacement?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I've heard that there's some guys that they'll go in every couple years and have the actual pad.
I don't know if it's like a silicone pad or something that they just cut them open with a small incision, pop it out, pop their hip out.
So I guess during the surgery, they go in from the front.
My guy went from the front.
So my leg was laying across my head while they're in there So it's a full-on scooping out the hip, sawing off the femur bone, putting a spike down the middle of your femur with the ball on top, and then putting it back in, and then waking you up about an hour later going, let's go for a walk!
joe rogan
Oh my god, how many inches is the spike?
The spike that goes into the bone.
maynard james keenan
I think it's like about 20 Irish inches.
joe rogan
About the size of my dick?
maynard james keenan
Sorry, what are we talking about?
joe rogan
The dick?
unidentified
Oh my god, look how far it goes in.
joe rogan
Jesus Christ, it's huge.
maynard james keenan
Thank you.
joe rogan
Oh my god.
Look at that.
Oh my god, that's freaking me out.
How does that not just like...
The mechanical leverage seems like it would just snap your femur.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, well...
joe rogan
Like if I leg kicked you, you think you'd be taking that okay?
maynard james keenan
I would...
Please don't.
joe rogan
Please don't leg kick me.
Right at the bottom of that spike, that's a wrap, son.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
I feel like right where that spike connects to the meat, I feel like...
unidentified
Someone who's got a real good leg kick which is going right through that.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, but I think the bone density, what happens with the bone density is that's why the healing process is so slow because the bone is actually healing around that thing.
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
That's maybe in theory more dense than the actual spike.
joe rogan
Whoa!
maynard james keenan
But you're right, just the physics of hitting, kicking that, you would think that's your weak spot.
joe rogan
What about like falling and stuff?
Do they advise you?
maynard james keenan
The one thing they don't have you do is, if you were to bend my leg back, my knee back that way, like a lunge back, and I do some kind of thing, it would pop out forward.
joe rogan
Oh, Jesus Christ!
unidentified
Now, even with no weight, No, it would have to be some kind of weight that would push forward.
maynard james keenan
But it used to be the way if I put my knees up on my chest to do like butterfly, the way that they designed the hip before, it would actually pop out that way.
But now they've fixed it where it has to be this other extreme angle to get it to pop out.
joe rogan
But it can pop out.
Has it popped out on you yet?
maynard james keenan
No, it has not.
joe rogan
Do you do any weightlifting to strengthen everything around it?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
A lot of walking.
unidentified
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Some weight training.
I really like the kettlebells.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Doing that stuff.
I think just that wrestling, working with somebody, not actually doing the takedowns for warm-up.
I do takedowns, but just that act of lateral, front, back, and then having somebody pull you those different ways.
joe rogan
And a low stance.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, low stance.
I like that low center, gravity drop.
joe rogan
That's good for the legs for sure.
maynard james keenan
So kettlebells, that, the battle ropes.
joe rogan
Do you do bodyweight squats?
maynard james keenan
I do not.
joe rogan
I'm a big fan of bodyweight squats.
Hindu squats they call them.
It's a type of squat that you do where you do like a lot of reps.
I'll do 200 reps and it's hard to do.
It seems like it's easy because you do the first 10, you're like, I could do 200. And then you get to 20, you're like, ooh.
Then you get to 50. So there's no weight.
maynard james keenan
You're just you doing your thing.
joe rogan
Just me.
And you go down.
You go down.
You drop your hands back.
You touch your hands to the ground.
And then as you go up, you bring your hands up forward.
Like, I'll show you.
maynard james keenan
Fuck that.
joe rogan
It looks like this.
It looks like this.
maynard james keenan
Hang on.
Hang on.
joe rogan
They're called Hindu squats.
maynard james keenan
Hang on.
Gotta get Conner over so much.
joe rogan
So you stand like this.
And you stand with your back straight up.
And your hands are like behind your butt.
And you go down like this.
One.
Two.
And as I'm going down, my heels go up.
So on the bottom, I'm actually on the ball on my feet, my heels are up, and my hands go behind my heels.
And then as I come up, I touch the ground, and I go up to this position.
And I breathe out as I do this.
200. 200 of these bitches.
maynard james keenan
You've done like five and I'm ready to take a nap.
joe rogan
Keep going, son.
Keep going.
maynard james keenan
Let's have a donut.
Can we just have donuts?
joe rogan
No, man.
I think a lot of people, they don't do enough shit with their legs.
maynard james keenan
Is that what you do?
joe rogan
The more shit you do with your legs, whether it's running or squatting or deadlifting, your whole body feels better.
People neglect that shit.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I do more leg stuff like that than I do arm stuff.
I think my next step, as I talked about before, is I had broken my wrists.
I think the last time I was in here, that actually was a broken wrist, not a sprained wrist.
joe rogan
Oh.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, so I actually broke both my wrists that year.
And I had shoulder issues, rotator shit issues.
joe rogan
Did you do anything to that?
maynard james keenan
I did those...
Stem cells?
Not the...
PRP? Not the PRP. The other one that they...
joe rogan
Regenikine?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I think so.
joe rogan
You did that one?
Where'd you do it?
maynard james keenan
In Arizona.
They were doing shots.
joe rogan
Oh, really?
maynard james keenan
They're not cheap.
joe rogan
No.
No, it's not cheap.
Do they take your own blood and do it?
maynard james keenan
No, and that's why I did it.
joe rogan
No, because it's not Regenikin.
It must be something different.
maynard james keenan
Okay, so it's like, you know, it's something like that, and then I started researching going, whoa, you know, we just discovered hep C a couple years ago.
Maybe I shouldn't be putting some kind of weird foreign shit in my shoulders.
joe rogan
They just discovered hep C a couple years ago?
maynard james keenan
Well, you know, just hepatitis in general, like, it's, you know, it's like...
joe rogan
It's on the rise?
maynard james keenan
Well, 20 years ago, people didn't know what the hell that was, you know, 30 years ago.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
They just thought people were skanks.
They didn't know.
Skanks have actual terrible diseases.
Male and female skanks.
maynard james keenan
I'm just thinking, and just in general, things that we...
Here, take some Prozac.
And then, no, don't take any Prozac.
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
Just changing their minds about everything that they put in you or pull out of you.
joe rogan
That's for sure.
That's for sure true.
maynard james keenan
So, you know, I stopped.
I want to do more of what you were doing with actually spinning out your own stem cells and doing that.
joe rogan
There's a couple different procedures that they're doing now.
One of them that's really important is they're shooting stem cells directly into disc tissue.
So people that have bulging discs, they're able to heal the discs and actually create more disc tissue.
And this is all just super cutting-edge stuff.
The stem cell technology is some of the most intriguing and fascinating things that are going on right now in modern medicine.
They're able to do amazing work.
They think that within a few years, they're going to be able to fix things.
Here's one thing they're doing.
This is really important for people.
I better not forget this.
When they used to blow out things like ACLs, they used to have to replace it.
They used to either replace it with a cadaver ligament, or they would replace it with your patella tendon.
They would cut a piece of that, like I had that done.
Or they would take your hamstring, sometimes they take a chunk of your hamstring and they screw it in place.
Now, they have a new method, real new, where they can actually, they figured out a way to repair the actual ACL itself.
They figured out how to tie it back together again, and it heals, it heals way quicker.
You're walking almost instantly, like after the surgery, and you're back to action in three months.
It's a totally different ballgame.
They had this guy who competed in the Olympics five months after getting the surgery on his Achilles.
He blew out his Achilles.
And he used to be like, instantaneously, your leg was useless.
And it was useless for like a year.
Now this guy's five months later is competing in the Olympics.
And they're shooting stem cells in there to help the healing.
It's fucking crazy what's going on right now.
maynard james keenan
That's nuts.
joe rogan
We're living in an awesome time.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I mean, for a guy like Hickson who has all those back problems, man, this is...
let's get him on that.
joe rogan
I know, right?
Yeah, I think Hickson is all, like, holistic, though, you know?
He wants to just do yoga and...
maynard james keenan
Ride off into the sunset on somebody's, like, a pale horse or some shit.
joe rogan
Yeah, yeah.
maynard james keenan
Come on, dude.
joe rogan
Yeah, like, meditate on something while they light it on fire, and that's how he's gonna go out.
You know what I mean?
I don't know how much he's into getting a bunch of stuff shot into him.
I mean, I think I admire that in a lot of ways.
He's a fascinating character and he's the guy, in my opinion, that opened up a lot of people's eyes to yoga from that Choke documentary.
People saw that and they were like, oh, wait a minute.
The baddest motherfucker on earth does yoga?
And when you see what he can do with his body, you're like, oh, well, of course.
How are you going to hold on to that guy?
Look at how he can move.
He can stand up on a balance beam and do a full split holding his foot over his head, and he's 40 at the time he was.
Now he's in his 50s.
He's amazing.
Quite a fascinating guy, but not interested in getting shot up with stem cells.
I am.
Sign me up.
maynard james keenan
I don't even have problems with my ACL. I just want to do it.
Let's just do it.
joe rogan
Let's just do it.
Shoot it in there.
Shoot it everywhere.
maynard james keenan
Find out what happens.
joe rogan
Yeah, some people go down to Mexico and they get it shot into their veins.
That Dan Bilzerian guy, you know who that guy is?
The internet.
He's hilarious.
I've had him on the podcast before.
He's a poker player, and his fame is from being this internet guy with a ton of money that flies around in jets and has all these hot chicks with him.
He's always shooting guns and driving dune buggies and shit.
He goes down to Mexico all the time and gets it shot in his veins intravenously.
And I'm like, what does it do for you?
He's like, I don't know, I feel fucking great.
He just doesn't even know.
Like, is it good?
Is it bad?
No one exactly knows.
unidentified
Right.
joe rogan
But they take stem cells and they just...
maynard james keenan
He's got electrolytes.
joe rogan
They launch and then you intervene.
Bas Rutten said he did it.
He felt like he had power coming.
He goes, it was like I had light coming out of my hands.
unidentified
Like, ah!
maynard james keenan
Like the first time you did meth.
Okay.
joe rogan
No, I think it's better than that.
unidentified
Okay.
joe rogan
It's better than that.
It's like meth and ecstasy together.
maynard james keenan
All right.
joe rogan
It's like you're energetic, but you're also loving.
I think there's something to what we're doing right now where I think within the next 20 or 30 years, we're going to have a real problem with people not dying.
Grandpa.
maynard james keenan
Not with the current administration.
unidentified
Still around, huh?
maynard james keenan
I think they're gonna be alright with that.
joe rogan
Do you think so, man?
That motherfucker, he's so egomaniacal, don't you think he'll be shooting stem cells into himself and trying to keep himself alive forever?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, but he's gonna send anybody else off to go fight for the materials that go into those shots.
joe rogan
Imagine if Trump found out about it before anybody.
He started reverse aging, like Benjamin Buttons.
maynard james keenan
That'd be amazing.
joe rogan
Just all of a sudden, Trump is like younger again, kind of freaking everybody out.
We know he's 90, but he looks great.
unidentified
Yep.
maynard james keenan
As long as he goes all the way down to where you can put him over your knee and give him a timeout.
joe rogan
What do you think is going to happen with this dude?
maynard james keenan
I think it's a smokescreen.
I think there's so many other things going on that we're not paying attention to.
But it is a testament to just the level of frustrations, I think, that people have had just with government in general.
And the internet and the social media has been able to polarize us all enough to where we don't talk to each other to really sort out some of the actual issues that are going on.
So you have this spectacle going on right now that It's amazing.
joe rogan
It is a spectacle, but I always wonder whether or not it's an orchestrated spectacle or whether we just try to find patterns when patterns don't even exist.
And what it really is is just this is just a goofy dude who loves attention and we have a fucking popularity contest to see who runs the country.
maynard james keenan
And again, like I said, you go back, you know, just back it up to see were people really frustrated with the Obama administration?
Were they frustrated with the Bush administration?
Is it connected?
Are they just looking for something different?
Because if you look historically at places that have had some success as a country, and then they have some problems, they start seeing some issues and they just, whatever the incumbent person is, the party, the group, All they want is something else something different.
We want to get rid of that but something different in and historically when that happens Shit just go sideways that just because they just wanted anything else and they got exactly what they got something worse.
joe rogan
Yeah Yeah, that's the problem is worrying about it the same way you worried about technology like one guy can one day create one thing and it fucking ruins everything and you almost feel like that with like a president like we can ask for Something different and then one day we get it and it fucking ruins everything.
What I worry about most is a lot of what he's doing like with this battle against the intelligence agencies.
All the shitty talks about them.
It's like if they start hiding stuff from him because they're worried that he's gonna tell stuff to Russian guys and you know and talk about certain things like like he revealed top-secret information about Isis want to use laptops as bombs.
He told the Russians that like Yeah.
versus him, you got a real serious problem on your hands then, because that attitude is going to carry on to the next administration.
Yeah.
Whether it's Pence or some Democrat or whoever the fuck comes in after him.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
Fuck, man.
It's all scary.
It's just people didn't know what they were voting for.
They didn't understand.
They thought it was going to be, we're going to drain the swamp.
Like, this motherfucker just, he just backed up the biggest sewer truck ever to the swamp, and he's pumping shit in there like crazy.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Well, you know, I agree.
But I think the only...
Again, all we can do, I think, is to step back and fight the battle.
So if you can think of the battlefield as being your old school, you know, there's the goals over there, capture the flag kind of battlefield.
Your first battle is ignorance.
Your first enemy is ignorance.
Trying to figure out how to get past the misinformation, all that stuff, just to get past ignorance.
Educate yourself, first of all.
joe rogan
You don't think the Earth's flat?
I think we need to see a rock from the sky slam into the Earth.
I think that's what we need.
We need, like, a small European city wiped out.
Just so we go, oh.
Oh, okay.
Well, this is crazy.
We're concentrating on bullshit.
We're in a goddamn shooting gallery.
Our life is just so short, we don't understand the real spans of time.
We don't understand that periodically this fucking whole thing is gonna get rattled.
maynard james keenan
Yes, extremely.
joe rogan
No doubt about it.
It's coming.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, so I think that's, you know, it's idle, you know, idle hands are the devil's playground.
You've heard that cliche.
I think that really is, you know.
So my prepper, that prepper side of me, is that person who, you know, what if we don't have, what if we don't have electricity for a week because of whatever.
joe rogan
You'll be fine.
maynard james keenan
For whatever reason.
joe rogan
Just drink wine.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, just, you know, just be, have an understanding of what that is so that when it's just a starter, a precursor, or just a dry run of what What happens when that rock does fall from the sky?
Because it happens all the time.
joe rogan
Historically.
maynard james keenan
Historically it happens a lot.
And I do believe that that would be the reset button.
I'd prefer not to have that be the reset button.
I'd prefer that our consciousness caught up with itself and we just kind of start talking to each other.
joe rogan
I would like that too, but I think we need something.
We need a little shake-em-up.
Maybe he doesn't even have to hit a city.
Like, how about hit the ocean?
And we catch it on video.
Just boom!
Mile-high waves.
Wipes out all of Carbon Beach and Malibu.
Come on, son.
All those billion-dollar...
They call that billionaire beach.
These fucking assholes.
maynard james keenan
But it would only work if it was a global event.
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
Because if it's isolated, because we've had tsunamis in large cities, nobody does anything about it.
It would have to be, we had Katrina, but that's down there with those people.
It needs to be something that's nationwide, that hits all of us at the same time, where we stop with this bullshit, stop with this polarized bullshit and start talking to each other.
joe rogan
This is what happens.
Connor connects with a left hand on Floyd Mayweather's chin.
Floyd goes down and at the count of eight, when he's about to get up, the whole arena gets hit with a meteor.
Boom!
Las Vegas is wiped off the face of the planet.
Everybody's dead.
But we saw the feed up until the asteroid impact.
It's just one big bright spark of light.
And then everybody starts tuning into CNN. There's a huge crater where Vegas used to be.
maynard james keenan
The asteroid, though, has an EMP that hits every single feed that goes to every single camera and TV. And it wipes out every electronic device that's been watching the whole thing.
joe rogan
Oh, now you're getting too crazy.
maynard james keenan
Wait a minute.
joe rogan
We just need to wipe out Vegas.
maynard james keenan
Can you help me out here?
joe rogan
We don't even need to wipe out Vegas.
I love Vegas.
Don't get me wrong.
I just feel like we need something where people are...
maynard james keenan
They have to see it.
It has to affect them on some level that actually kick-starts their compassion gene.
You want a balance between your survival gene and your compassion gene.
Because, you know, you've got to figure back a long time ago the thing that helped us...
We weren't stronger, we weren't faster, we weren't larger than the things that were eating us.
We had to be smarter, we had to be clever, we had to come up with ways to create something from nothing to be able to defend ourselves against the predators that were eating us.
So that creative juice was there, and we were establishing food, shelter, and clothing as well as Keeping protected from predators.
And it was that creative side of us, that artistic side of us, that actually was, you know, that's what you have to thank, that creative side of us to keep us ahead of these creatures.
The elements, all these things.
And as time has gone on, when you no longer are threatened by these things, there's plenty of clothes everywhere, pretty much plenty of food everywhere where we live.
joe rogan
And a lot of idle hands.
maynard james keenan
A lot of idle hands.
And so we've lost touch with that imminent threat.
So we have, we started to turn on each other.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
All those girls with fake asses.
People get mad.
maynard james keenan
I'm mad.
joe rogan
That Iggy Azalea, what's her name?
I was hearing all these people angry at her because her ass is fat.
Angry.
Just angry at her fake ass.
maynard james keenan
Well, they don't even have a McRib here at the McDonald's.
joe rogan
Does Arizona keep a McRib?
unidentified
I don't know.
joe rogan
12 seasons?
maynard james keenan
12 months out of here?
No disrespect to the people that get caught up in that broken nail.
Syndrome, but like that is what it is.
It's your it's tragedies are Not tragedies, right?
So we need some kind of life-threatening something that's really global and it's it crosses religious economic Social racial it has to cross all those lines to where people are like What the fuck?
joe rogan
Yeah, it has to expose microaggressions for the preposterous notion that they really are Like, if you get hit in the head with a meteor and someone gets mad at a microaggression, they're two very different things.
maynard james keenan
Did you see that meteor almost hit him?
joe rogan
Her!
maynard james keenan
Okay, did you see that meteor almost hit her?
joe rogan
Yeah.
unidentified
Cisgendered piece of shit.
joe rogan
Living with all those cowboys in Arizona.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Whatever, bro.
joe rogan
I'm a big fan of Arizona.
Some of my favorite people live there.
maynard james keenan
Use any one of my bathrooms.
Feel free.
joe rogan
Thank you.
That's sweet.
Do you have a restaurant there, too?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
We just opened in Osteria.
joe rogan
How the fuck do you have time for all this?
maynard james keenan
I don't do it myself.
joe rogan
Okay, that's big.
maynard james keenan
I plan it, I get it all going, and then I hand it off to awesome people.
joe rogan
That's a good move.
maynard james keenan
So Jesse and Chris and Joe are running that thing.
Brianna.
It's an Osteria.
joe rogan
What is an Osteria?
maynard james keenan
Basically a wine bar with food.
So it's a gathering place where you're combining.
joe rogan
Like that place we went to in Studio City?
maynard james keenan
Yes.
joe rogan
What's that place called?
maynard james keenan
Agustin Wine Bar.
joe rogan
Goddamn, that was good.
The food was amazing too.
maynard james keenan
Yes, awesome.
Matthew Kaner.
Wonderful place.
joe rogan
They brought out some 1921. Oh yeah, we did some...
maynard james keenan
You raped me that night.
joe rogan
Financially?
maynard james keenan
Yes, financially and emotionally.
joe rogan
It wasn't my idea.
I didn't ask you to spend that much money.
I don't know what kind of wine that was.
But it was a fascinating wine.
It was like, ooh, this is wine?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
I kind of got it for a brief moment.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
And then I wandered off under some tangent.
I think I actually said, I think I was like, hey, set up a fight with me and Bourdain.
joe rogan
No, you wanted to fight somebody.
I don't think it was Bourdain.
Was it Bourdain?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, Anthony Bourdain.
joe rogan
He might kill you, dude.
maynard james keenan
I was pretty drunk.
joe rogan
He's crazy.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Anthony's got the crazy gene, for sure.
He's got that I used to be a former heroin addict and I almost died gene.
It only gets activated in people that have been to the brink of death.
I've met a bunch of people like that, though.
I think it's a real thing.
I think there's something that happened.
There's some scary people.
Like Matt Brown, the guy who fights in the UFC. Same kind of gene.
He's got that I used to die.
I died when I came back gene.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I met him.
He's a really nice guy.
joe rogan
He's a nice guy, but...
maynard james keenan
There's that edge of like, I think maybe...
joe rogan
They've been to the Dark Lands.
When people have been to the Dark Lands, they come back different.
It's like Stephen King's Pet Cemetery.
You know, you bury the cat, it comes back to life, and it's like, okay.
maynard james keenan
Don't bring the cat back to life.
joe rogan
Don't fuck with that cat.
It is something that happens to people when they've been to the Dark Lands.
unidentified
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, so the Osteria, Arizona grows its own wheat, so all of our pastas and breads are from Arizona wheat.
joe rogan
Oh, okay.
Let me ask you this.
maynard james keenan
Can you please not do that?
We're talking, Jimmy.
joe rogan
Jimmy fell.
This is a new Jimi Hendrix poster that we have, if you notice in the background, folks.
Because the old one was not really his mugshot.
The new one is actually his mugshot.
So we had it swapped out.
This is the real Jimi Hendrix mugshot.
maynard james keenan
Something fell off your wall there.
unidentified
I bought.
Yeah, we'll have to fix that.
joe rogan
Don't worry about it, folks.
We're going to be fine.
Is it true about wheat that there are strains that are wild or rather unmodified that are much more easy for the body to digest?
maynard james keenan
Yes, so Hayden Mills is one of the many down in Phoenix that are actually milling the local wheat.
So they're basically cultivating around southern Arizona heirloom wheat and that's the idea.
They're going back to The problem with it, of course, it's always got to give the give and take, is that those heirloom, pure heirloom wheats, they have far less complex glutens in them, and they don't produce as much wheat.
So just your production on an acre of land is significantly lower for the stuff, but it's tastier, it has more nutrients.
And then from there, the next step, of course, is people understanding thyme.
So you're taking that wheat, you're milling it, and then when you go to make your bread, any kind of fermentation in that that you're getting, you're inoculating that to...
Make your bread.
Letting this dough sit overnight, you're letting it rise for a longer period of time because that whole process is breaking down those glutens.
joe rogan
Oh.
unidentified
So my sourdough bread is apparently gluten-free?
maynard james keenan
The fermentation, you know, the rising of that dough is almost instantaneous, and it goes right in the oven, and then people are not chewing their food, they're just cramming it in, and it's probably coming from places that are doing a lot of pesticides and all the extra stuff that's going on those crops.
The heirloom wheat movement ends up tying hand in hand with understanding the slow food movement.
Take your minute, chew your food, understand where your food comes from, try to get it organic and local.
That goes all the way back to the wheat.
So to answer your question, yeah.
joe rogan
There is something to it.
maynard james keenan
What happened is they, over World War I, II, trying to make sure that people are going to be fed during those wars, they were manipulating the wheat so that it was much higher production wheat, but now the flavor's gone, the nutrition's not there.
It being resistant to all these things, all the glutens are very complex, and so when you're actually making the bread out of these things, or making pastas out of them, it's just, there's all this extra crap, you know, if you created a Frankenstein's monster with this wheat.
So your body, of course, is reacting to all those things that have nothing to do with actually having bread or having wheat.
joe rogan
It's a very controversial subject.
A lot of people try to claim that there's no difference between the weed of today and the weed of the past.
And they also try to claim that the only people that have issues with gluten are people that have gluten sensitivity, celiac disease, things along those lines.
And my gripe with that is that I always feel that the people that say that, they don't have a good sense of their body.
I don't think they're real athletes.
Because I think when you talk to a real athlete, I'm not saying that you can't perform like a real world-class athlete by eating pasta.
You definitely can.
What I think is we want to talk about total optimization.
If you want to talk about your body like running as smoothly as possible, for me at least, I notice a difference between eating a lot of bread and gluten, which I used to do a lot.
And not doing it.
When I don't do it, I just feel better.
I have more energy.
I feel like my body struggles less to digest the food, and I don't have the big crash after the food is over.
It doesn't mean that I can't perform on it.
I don't have a gluten sensitivity issue.
I can eat it.
That's not the problem.
If someone said, oh, you're fine, you eat it, it's no big deal.
It's not that it's no big deal.
I don't think it's the optimal thing to do.
I just think that...
It's delicious.
I don't think it's killing me.
But I don't think if you want to give your body the very best fuel, pasta, like regular pasta, isn't that fuel.
But I wonder if you can get some of that heirloom pasta if you would notice a difference.
I wonder if you would feel the difference in trying the two.
maynard james keenan
Okay, so similar conversation, parallel.
You're in Italy.
You're having bottles of wine.
You're having dinner.
It tastes great.
You had a good time.
You woke up the next day.
You didn't have a hangover.
All those things.
Over here I have wine, and I get hangovers, and I get sick, and I do those things.
So it must be that the Italian wine is better, or has less sulfites, or something like that.
Well, most likely what it was is over here, you're a fat pig, and you sat in your house, and you drank a bottle of wine with your buddies without taking a walk in a foreign country, because you're walking to your restaurant there.
You're having food, and you're eating over the course of three hours with your friends, and you're eating food with your wine.
You're eating less of it.
Most likely it has a lower alcohol content because it's meant to go with food rather than being this Mountain Dew with alcohol in it that you get out of California, right?
donald cerrone
You know, it's it's they're all in California once that we did not I did not I did now for a California Arizona thing we're going on maybe it may You're fucked.
joe rogan
You're all fucked.
unidentified
Okay.
maynard james keenan
Good Irish wine No, so I think there's an experiential thing that's happening with those conversations.
And it's the same thing with the pasta.
Pasta makes me feel sluggish.
You ate 17 pounds of it.
joe rogan
Right, right.
maynard james keenan
Don't eat 17 pounds of it.
But yes, going back to having just the initiation of like understanding the conversation of heirloom wheat and understanding that there's a difference, arguing that there's a difference.
Even if there isn't, now you're looking at it, maybe you're having less of it.
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
Maybe you're portioning out better, and you're paying attention to your diet more.
Hey, that's a step in the right direction.
Absolutely.
joe rogan
Yeah, I read something about the French, how the French are always eating bread, but they do have that older wheat bread, and they eat a lot of fats with their bread, like it's constantly with butter and oil, and they cook with a lot of butter and oil.
And those carbs and that oil together, apparently it's just a better fit for your digestive system.
maynard james keenan
I could see that.
I kind of did that...
I didn't stick to it, letter of the law, but I did a little bit of a ketogenic diet for a minute where I cut out sugars, carbs, all those things.
joe rogan
How'd you feel?
maynard james keenan
I felt a lot better right away.
Now I go back and I'll have some pasta once or twice a month in small portions.
I'll have some bread, but...
I don't eat a lot of it.
I enjoy it better now.
I enjoy more.
It's not just...
joe rogan
It's a treat.
maynard james keenan
It's a treat.
At that point, proteins and vegetables are the staple, and I have treats now.
joe rogan
Yeah, I feel the exact same way.
I feel like I have my nutrition, which is like I try to eat really healthy food 80% of the time, and then 20% of the time, I like to go to a restaurant and get linguine with clams.
It's just a It's just an experience.
It's a delicious experience.
I know it's not the best thing for me, but it's a treat.
maynard james keenan
You get one life, so let's enjoy it.
joe rogan
Also, especially what you're doing, when you have a restaurant, you're selling an experience, right?
It's just delicious wines and delicious foods and the two of them together with conversation.
You're like, oh, try this, try this.
When people are doing that, this whole sensory experience is all combined together.
It's not just about nutrition.
It's about the art of creating this sensory experience.
maynard james keenan
Because one could argue that your well-being is actually increasing your life experience here and your quality of life by having this experience with these people, with these wines, that you'll actually feel better tomorrow or next week because of that interaction, because of that show, even though that's straight butter and that's straight...
joe rogan
Yeah, and wine.
But no, I think you're 100% right.
I think that's sort of an overlooked aspect of health.
Positive experiences.
Also, when you go to a really good restaurant, and especially if you get to meet the cook.
You meet someone who cooks something for you, and you can say thank you, and you have this cool feedback with the person who made your food.
There's something going on there.
It's like this exchange, and it's like a sandcastle in the way.
It's beautiful, and it's amazing, and wow, the fucking skill involved in creating it, but then it's going to go away.
You know, it's gone.
It was a temporary experience.
And in this world of, you know, the NSA stockpiling text messages and dick pics in some fucking warehouse in Utah.
unidentified
Utah?
joe rogan
That's where it's at?
That's where it is.
It is.
Okay.
maynard james keenan
Address?
joe rogan
I don't know the address.
If I noted, I wouldn't give it out.
They'd come get me.
They'd come get you and tell you.
Now we're doubling down on your dick pics.
Yeah, they got a fucking warehouse.
Gigantic, like Costco, filled with hard drives.
maynard james keenan
Well, mine would have to be a slightly bigger warehouse, but, you know.
joe rogan
A bigger fucking Irish warehouse.
Fuck.
Yeah, I think, I mean, in the concerts too, right?
Like, live concerts are kind of that way too, right?
Like, that's a temporary experience.
I mean, there's one thing to listen to a song that you have on your phone, you can listen to it over and over again, but when you're going to see a live concert, you're experiencing the guy, like, on stage, sing that song, you're experiencing the sound coming out of the guitar right when the guy's touching the chords.
maynard james keenan
That's why this stuff annoys me, the phones at the shows, because...
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
I'm a firm believer in oral tradition.
I feel like I'm not from believe I just I embrace the storytelling.
I embrace that whole tradition of oral tradition and being able to describe to your friends that sitting around that, you know, fire after a good long day of hunting.
Well, you tell the story of the hunt and you do all those things and those family stories and other, you know, your grandfathers and your great-grandfather stories are told in that setting.
And you have to remember that you're not writing it down.
It's a tradition of understanding the details and being able to explain and expand on the details from your recollection of what you saw.
But if you have no skills of absorbing what you saw, if you rely on this thing, To capture those stories for you, first of all, nothing you're going to get at a show is going to represent what you just saw or what you were there for.
I guess as a postcard, I suppose it works, but it's not...
Stay present.
Stay with these people to be there for this thing.
That's far more important.
And, you know, also as courtesy because maybe the person behind you would like to be that person who's pulling this all in and now your shit's in their way.
joe rogan
People hold up fucking iPads.
Those 12-inch iPads.
I saw some dude at the Laugh Factory the other day had a fucking iPad.
The people behind you have to like Yeah.
You're holding up an iPad.
At concerts, you see, everybody's got their phone out.
maynard james keenan
So that first barrier we talked about, the ignorance, just getting past, understanding how to just get past not just what you think you know, all those things, erasing everything you think you know, get past your own ignorance, first of all.
Right.
But just then that situational awareness kind of goes hand-in-hand with that Who are you not only in your world, but who are you in other people's world?
When I'm driving, my primary mission is to get out of your way.
I want to get out of the way.
I want to get where I'm going.
I want to get out of the way.
I don't want to have you get out of my way because I'm going to a place.
I'm paying attention to where you are as I'm driving.
Because if I think like that, if I think I'm in your way, this is all going to work out better.
We're all going to get along.
If you think like that on the road, like, I am in your way.
Let me figure out how I can make sure that I'm getting where I'm going.
I'm not going to put myself out.
I'm not just going to pull over to the side of the road while you all drive by.
I'm going to get out of the way so that I make it convenient for you to get where you're going as well.
We're all going someplace, right?
We're in a car, right?
Let's not fight here.
joe rogan
Yeah, let's not film ourselves driving either.
I saw someone FaceTiming while they're driving the other day.
Holding up the phone, talking to someone.
I'm passing by.
I saw a dude doing Candy Crush a while back, playing Candy Crush on his phone while he was driving.
It's like, whoa.
People film fireworks.
Does anybody ever watch it?
maynard james keenan
That makes no sense to me.
joe rogan
Yeah, you send it?
Dude, you wouldn't believe the fireworks.
I'm gonna send it to you.
Dude, please send it.
I can't wait to see it.
Is that video of fireworks?
Can I put it on Instagram?
Do you mind if I re-gram your fireworks?
Hey bro, I'd rather you not.
I'd really like all the hits.
This is a big part of my social media.
unidentified
I want all the hits on that awful video that's out of focus.
joe rogan
You can't even tell what the fuck it is.
Just see some lights flashing off.
But when you go to a fireworks display, you see 50 fucking people holding up their goddamn phones.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
What are you doing?
Live your goddamn life!
Live your fucking life, right?
unidentified
Speaking to live your life, when you- It's all wound up, man.
joe rogan
I'm always wound up.
I got problems.
maynard james keenan
Calm down.
joe rogan
I ran today.
maynard james keenan
Connor.
joe rogan
Fucking settle down.
Settle down, I'll put you down.
Well, you have so many different projects.
How do you choose, like, what to...
Like, when you take on something like a restaurant or, you know, opening this jiu-jitsu school or any of the numerous projects that you do, you already are so fucking busy.
You have a family.
You already have these businesses and bands.
How do you decide, like, what...
Do you just go on your instinct, like what to do?
maynard james keenan
Well, you know, everything has its own individual needs.
And when it comes to bands or touring or writing, there are absolute needs and processes.
Lead times, right?
If you're going to put out a book, you have to understand that there's a...
He said as he held up his...
joe rogan
He wrote a book, too.
Fuck.
maynard james keenan
He plugged the biography.
joe rogan
Guy makes me feel lazy.
He's one of the few people I know that makes me feel lazy.
maynard james keenan
Actually, I wrote it with Sarah.
You know, I was involved.
You can credit goes to Sarah Jensen.
joe rogan
Sarah Jensen with Maynard James Keenan.
unidentified
Yes.
joe rogan
Ooh.
A perfect union of contrary things.
maynard james keenan
Boom.
joe rogan
Hmm.
maynard james keenan
With my American...
Yeah, so it's understanding, organizing your time.
Delegating is huge.
Delegating is huge.
Understanding what it's going to take, what kind of effort it's going to take for those things.
When it comes to winemaking, I'm locked down for that period of time.
When it comes to writing, for example, with Tool or with Perfect Circle or Pulsifer.
Understanding, you know, timing.
And we can get into that in a minute.
joe rogan
Wait, wait, no.
maynard james keenan
Okay.
Yeah, so it really does come down to understanding.
I'm really good at planning, you know, planning ahead and looking at things.
So if I think, if somebody comes along and says, hey, we're going to do a, we're thinking about doing a film, you want to be in the film, I go, well, when is it?
Because I already have my year.
You should see my schedule.
It's a year and a half out.
joe rogan
Really?
You're just locked in?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, because there's things that I know.
For example, if you're going to put out vinyl as a band, generally speaking, unless you're somebody who can make some calls and cut some corners, if you're going to deliver a master to actually cut vinyl, and nowadays you want your vinyl to come out on the day that your record comes out.
You don't want it to be a delayed thing and have it all be scattered.
It takes, you know, three months.
That's your lead time.
joe rogan
For production?
maynard james keenan
No less than three months.
joe rogan
And you have to make an order, like, say, like, X amount of thousands that you have printed?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, so you have to plan ahead.
So if you finally get all your shit together, and you've got your masters, you're going to do a thing, then you have to go, okay, well then, once that's there...
The release date can't be any sooner than this date.
Well, if that date is January 1st, that's not good.
Nobody releases a record on January 1st.
unidentified
Why is that?
maynard james keenan
Just because it's a bad time to release a record.
It just came out of Christmas.
It's like business-wise, you just don't do that.
Having a rock concert on a New Year's Eve, that's a different thing.
unidentified
Right.
maynard james keenan
People are out partying.
They're going to do their thing.
So you're going to release a record in the spring.
You're going to release a record in the fall.
That's when you release it, generally speaking.
People release all summer as well, but the optimum times are optimum times.
So just knowing that, okay, well, if it takes that long to produce the record and get, you know, set up press and do interviews, you know, as for lead times in a magazine or online, you know, interviews are scheduled out.
We had this planned.
joe rogan
Months ago.
maynard james keenan
A couple months ago.
unidentified
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Because you wouldn't just call me last week and go, hey, you're going to come in now?
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
We don't know what our schedules are, so you're thinking ahead.
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
So the same thing with the music.
You're always kind of looking ahead to go, well, in order to deliver that master, that means we had to be mastering that piece by here and we had to be mixing and, you know, mixing and then looking at the mixes again and fixing anything.
It's going to retract something, any kind of, you know, scrambling last minute before mixing.
That's going to take this amount of time.
Well, in order to mix, we have to track, right?
So you have to have everything written before you can actually track it to mix it, generally speaking.
So that means all the songs have to be written by this day if you're going to record all of them and mix all of them and master all of them and release them all on the same day, right?
joe rogan
Wow.
maynard james keenan
So you have to think all the way back to that day.
Like, where are we today?
Are those songs finished today?
Well, then we can start recording them tomorrow or next week.
joe rogan
Now, how do you know when a song is finished?
Like, if you give yourself a deadline, like, say, if you say, you know, we have six months to complete this album or whatever it would be, and you have a song that, like, man, it's just something about the songs.
This doesn't feel right.
It's not done.
Just something feels off.
Like, how do you finish something by a deadline?
maynard james keenan
Sometimes you don't.
joe rogan
Do you just take it out of the album and put it aside for later?
How do you do that?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, of course that varies with everybody.
If it's not ready, it's not ready.
So you keep delaying and try to get it right, I guess.
Or you second guess it, or you start realizing, these are just songs.
We should probably just finish them.
joe rogan
Hmm.
Remember that feeling when you were a kid where you'd get an album and some of the songs were just fucking amazing and then you would hear one or two and you're like, what the fuck is this piece of shit?
How did this kid own a Rolling Stones album?
maynard james keenan
Well, most likely it's because they had a deadline.
And their record company made them, they were locked into a contract that said that they had to deliver by a certain time.
But if you're not locked into that kind of a contract, then you can kind of take forever, which is an equally awful thing.
joe rogan
Are you free of contracts now?
Are you your own man when it comes to music?
maynard james keenan
Tool has one more record under a contract.
Perfect Circle just signed up for a one-album deal through a company.
To do a one-off album.
Pussifer is an independent project.
We've been independent from the beginning.
joe rogan
Do you prefer that?
Or is there benefits to both?
maynard james keenan
I think there's benefits to all those things.
It depends on how many trust issues you have, I guess.
If you're going to work with a large company, if you can trust them to handle and carry some of the water...
On some of these things without it getting lost or spilled or, you know, dumped.
Yeah, you can work with a company like that.
It depends on your goals, I suppose.
joe rogan
Is it like more of a benefit now that you're, I mean, especially, I don't know if now you're dealing with the resurgence of vinyl, but it's been pretty steady over the last few years, right?
It's kind of like a mason jar type thing.
People are into old, funky stuff, you know?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I think there's still that nostalgic feel of touching the vinyl and being able to have that thing and listen to it.
There is a difference, but I feel like, going back to what you had mentioned earlier about people realizing, I think we need to start looking and talking to each other again and reconnecting, and I feel like vinyl is another tip of that iceberg, of that reconnection of like, It's not long.
This is so temporary and so...
joe rogan
Yeah.
Digital.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, so one EMP away from all that stuff being gone.
All those experiences you wasted, you were recording the fireworks rather than actually looking at the fireworks, and then you dropped your phone in the toilet, and it's gone.
joe rogan
It's gone.
maynard james keenan
Or an EMP wipes out all of the servers that are on your cloud, and so all those photos that you thought were safe somewhere are no longer safe.
joe rogan
You're freaking me out, man.
maynard james keenan
You're right.
But yeah, so I think vinyl, there's a connection, there's a tactile.
joe rogan
Does it sound better?
maynard james keenan
I think it does.
Yeah, I think it does.
Oh, it depends on, are you Creed?
It's never gonna sound better.
joe rogan
How dare you?
What about Nickelback?
Shit on all the bands, you can shit on them with a free punch.
maynard james keenan
Hurry up.
Get all your shots in.
joe rogan
Menudo was a good one.
NSYNC was always a good one.
maynard james keenan
Menudo!
Wow, you went deep.
joe rogan
Deep.
Backstreet Boys, remember?
You'd be able to punch down on them.
That was the easy shot.
maynard james keenan
I had the Menudo album.
unidentified
Did you?
maynard james keenan
No.
joe rogan
Nobody takes more punches than Nickelback.
They take a lot of shots.
People just go after them.
And they never fight back.
They're like, what the fuck, man?
maynard james keenan
Well, because they know on some level they asked for it.
Sorry.
joe rogan
How'd they ask for it?
maynard james keenan
I don't know.
I'm just jumping in on this rat pack.
joe rogan
They make good stripper music.
maynard james keenan
Yes, they do.
joe rogan
You know, they make good pole music.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
unidentified
Right?
joe rogan
Girls spin around on a pole.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
It's Nickelback.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, so I think that's the vinyl connection, I think.
There's a lot of guys nowadays, like Tool, for example, they like analog.
They like tracking to tape, and to really translate those things, vinyl is your perfect medium for that thing.
It's just not very convenient.
There's no record stores.
When I released the first Pussifer record in 2007, From the time we started recording that record to the time we released it, there was one number of stores when we started recording, and there was one-fifth the number of stores actually in existence by the time we actually released it.
The record industry stopped.
And went away during that period of time.
joe rogan
So 2007 was when the wave rolled back, like you could see it happening.
maynard james keenan
It was gone.
And it was gone.
And that was still with Best Buys that were still selling CDs, was still part of that 120th.
unidentified
Wow.
maynard james keenan
So now this is all, it's all rolled back to where the small independent stores that weren't greedy, that really had a relationship with their customers, that enjoyed vinyl, that had all those things, those are the ones that have survived and thrived, like Amoeba.
joe rogan
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
maynard james keenan
Those kind of, but much smaller versions of those things, like Zia Records and Arizona.
joe rogan
Yeah, I've seen a few of those on the road, and I've gone into a bunch of them, and they're kind of cool.
It's a totally different thing.
It's almost like you're going to an antique store or something.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, Stinkweeds is great.
If you ever go through...
joe rogan
Stinkweeds?
maynard james keenan
Oh, yeah.
joe rogan
Where's that?
maynard james keenan
In Arizona.
joe rogan
Oh, what part?
maynard james keenan
Tempe?
I think Tempe.
I know.
Kimber's gonna kill me.
Tempe.
Because I couldn't remember what it is.
joe rogan
I used to do the Tempe improv all the time.
That's a cool little spot.
Tempe's an interesting little town.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Yeah, that whole area is really awesome.
joe rogan
So, when you make a run of those things, you kind of have to decide, like, as they're selling, when to make more of them, too, right?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, well, as a small project like Pustopher, you're, you know, we're writing the checks, so you don't want to overproduce these things, because then you're kind of sitting on them.
And for us, at the level that we're operating...
You always want to operate in that level where it's...
joe rogan
Sustainable.
maynard james keenan
Right.
That's kind of a beat word.
But yeah, I use it all the time because it's the most accurate word to really look.
Yeah, sustainable.
If I can keep this thing alive, I don't want to keep going back to other pockets of money to make this thing alive.
This thing should stand on its own.
So you have to be making all these decisions...
As if this is an independent business on its own, ready to survive.
And so, yeah, you have to pay attention to if they want, you know, if they want 10, make 9. Interesting.
Yeah.
unidentified
If they want 10, make 9. Give the people wanting more.
Always.
maynard james keenan
Always.
joe rogan
Don't live past your means.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
Stay up there.
Stay up there in that good Goldilocks zone.
unidentified
Yes.
joe rogan
Do you anticipate ever trimming it down to one band?
Or do you like working with three different projects?
maynard james keenan
I think just the nature of Tool in general.
I'll jump into them.
I'll just want to use.
Just their process and their writing process is so drawn out.
I'm sure there's a lot of reasons that go into why the delay has been so long.
But when you have a project like that, there's always going to be time for me to do other things.
And I will definitely...
I just like doing it.
I like doing it more.
I like to release records and write things a little more quickly than those guys like to write.
So their process is...
Very analytical and I think you know at some point maybe because so much time has gone by with from the last album there has to be some a little bit of fear in there you know in your gut like how is this record going to be as good as the last one you know the anticipation now is now the pressure is huge so I'm sure there's some of that goes into play but as far as the way that Danny and Adam and Justin write It's a very tedious,
long process.
And they're always going back over things and questioning what they did and stepping back and going back farther and going forward.
And in a way, it's like they're laying a foundation.
They're putting in the footings for a house.
So I can't write melodies until the footings are in place.
until the melodies are in place.
So I can't build walls and then start decorating this place until the foundation is in place.
Because if they keep changing the foundation, changing the footings, the melodies change, and then the story, of course, isn't getting written.
So that's where we are.
I mean, there's a lot of footings that keep shifting.
Lots of awesome footings, but they keep changing.
And they keep changing their minds.
So I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing.
It's just their process.
joe rogan
Is this a challenge for you to kind of manage your own personal expectations with the work of others?
Because I know you're very prolific, and you're a guy that's just like, you're very disciplined, so you're always grinding.
And then when you manage those expectations, and you're dealing with a bunch of other artists, and you're all...
You know, converging together, converging together on this project.
Can I make a word up?
maynard james keenan
He just made it up.
Yeah, so like, you know, when you have a lot of very strong-willed, stubborn, opinionated people that have had success, myself included, like when you give somebody some success, they're pretty convinced they're right.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
You know, so it's hard to talk to me.
It's hard to talk to them.
It's hard to talk to people that are in that position because they've been successful.
And so you think that the reason you got there is because of whatever position it is you're taking today.
Right.
Which is fine.
But our process has evolved over the years.
unidentified
And...
maynard james keenan
That, you know, that stubborn nature.
You try, you have to, again, take a step back and not take any of these things personally.
You know, that's our tendency.
It's like, what is you?
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
You know, you get that way.
It's a familiarity breeds contempt kind of thing.
joe rogan
How much of the problem is expectations of the fans?
Because fans want new shit.
Come on, where's the fucking new shit?
maynard james keenan
And that's, you know, I'm sure that that was around 15, 20 years ago, but without social media and without that direct access of bitching.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
You know, like the star reviews on iTunes when people are writing reviews of shows or music or movies or whatever.
It's like, again, go to a master, learn from the master to the point where you are now, you have mastership.
All of that's gone.
He's just like, it fucking suck.
It took forever to load.
I don't like the guy with that hair.
Fuck this one, one star.
joe rogan
Right.
But people like being able to do that.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, they love it.
joe rogan
Especially if you work at Jiffy Lube.
You're sitting there, and you're on your fucking break, and you're smoking a cigarette, and you're farting, and you're sitting there, and you're like, fuck this song, fuck this outfit, fuck his head.
maynard james keenan
Right, yeah.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's like, it doesn't ever make sense.
maynard james keenan
So, you know, so in my brother's defense, even Billy from Perfect Circle, he's slow-moving as well.
But he has a lot of, you know, now we're starting to work on stuff that it's taken many years for him to kind of build up the cache of things that we're, you know, we're digging into to look at things that have been in development for, you know, the last six, eight, ten years.
joe rogan
Well, you seem to have found this interesting balance because you're such a, you have so many different things that require your focus.
But you're one of those dudes that has to get shit done.
I've met a lot of guys like you that are just like, I'm getting shit done.
You're either in my way, or you're gonna help me, or you're gonna get the fuck out of my way, but I'm getting shit done.
And so you're like, okay, I can't get shit done over here.
I'm gonna get shit done over here.
I'm gonna go do this.
I'm gonna start a wine company.
Now I'm making a restaurant.
Oh, look, I have a jiu-jitsu school.
Look, I wrote a book.
You're just constant.
It's fascinating because you're also...
Pretty at peace.
Like, you found, like, this strange balance of activity and then also relative isolation in your small area.
maynard james keenan
Well, it took me a while to, like, you know, my desire to move forward, go, go, go, and get things done, you know, I'm always butting heads with the guys in the band in Tool.
To get those things done.
It's just not their process.
So it took me a while for me to go, this is not personal.
This is just them.
This is just the way that they have to do it.
And I have to respect it.
And I have to take my time and let them take their time.
And I just check in.
I just go, I come and I see what's going on.
Hey, Justin, send me the track, see where we're at.
Is this thing done?
If this thing is done, done, done, and I can start writing...
Words and music on it?
Great.
But I've had instances where I've started to write stuff, and by the time I actually got it around and back and were actually listening and whatever, the song had gone in a completely different direction, so everything that was written melody-wise or lyric-wise was completely irrelevant.
Now I have to start over.
joe rogan
Is that weird because you guys aren't in the same location physically?
maynard james keenan
Right, right.
I mean, I can sit there in that room and be with them in that room, but their process is so tedious and so, like, Rain Man that I just can't.
I just start fucking folding in on myself.
I'll be right back.
joe rogan
I gotta go make pasta.
maynard james keenan
I'll be right back.
I gotta go take five years to plant a vineyard because you'll still be right where you were when I left.
But it's a great thing.
What they're doing is a wonderful...
I completely back what they're doing.
joe rogan
Yeah, I see what you're saying.
There's no other way to do it.
maynard james keenan
There's no other way for them to do it.
For me, I can move much more quickly if you'll let me help you.
I've written a few songs.
In fact, I was involved in many of them.
The ones that we've done.
So we could do that.
But I think...
This is what they need to do.
And I'm okay with it.
You've got to get a little friction in there, so I have to come in and puff my chest out a little bit and be aggressive and let's move it, guys.
Let's move it.
And that works for a minute, and we definitely make traction.
But if I were to do that every day...
It would just become a part of the friction, more friction, rather than actually getting anything done.
joe rogan
That seems like one of the biggest problems with bands, right?
It's just getting the personalities together.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're definitely very strong, four very strong personalities.
You know, with Billy, working with Billy with Perfect Circle, he gets a little forest for trees sometimes, and I'm like the guy going, what?
Step back, look at it.
And then I'm out the door.
Poor guy's going, where'd you go?
And then, you know, working with Matt Mitchell and Karina and Pussifer.
We all generally work with or for other projects and other people, so when we get together, we are fucking streamlined organized.
We go, okay, I'll check in with the guys in Tool and go, okay, where are we at?
What do we got?
Are we there?
Are we going to track tomorrow?
Because if we're going to track tomorrow, I can tell you, great, then we're going to line this up.
But if we're not going to track tomorrow, and it's going to take this much time, Well, then I'm going to do this other thing while we're telling me when that day is.
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
When we're ready to start, when these are done, I can take my time to write them.
I mean, in all fairness, I should take my 10 years to write lyrics now, but I won't do that.
unidentified
Right.
maynard james keenan
I'll digest these things as quickly as I can and keep that moment, that freshness of what my impressions are of the finished tracks, and we'll start.
But nothing's, you know...
Nothing is tracked yet.
Nothing is completely finished.
There's a couple songs that I think are finished now.
I can start working on those.
But nothing's actually recorded.
They're just written.
Right.
So that leaves time.
So I can actually go and work with Billy.
I can work with Matt and Karina and get other things done in the interim so there's more.
Right.
joe rogan
When you write something, say if you have an idea, if you're just sitting around and you're like, I have a thought, do you just sit down and do you go, okay, this is a Tool song, this is a Perfect Circle song, this is a Pussifer song, does it just like...
maynard james keenan
No, because what I'm writing to is the music that I'm hearing from those people.
joe rogan
So that's all you write to?
maynard james keenan
I write to the music, because that way it's a unique island situation.
Whenever I've tried to write, I've had some poetry sitting over here that I want to write, and I try to force it onto a song for any of those projects.
It doesn't work.
It doesn't seem to fit.
joe rogan
So you need to hear the song.
maynard james keenan
I need to hear the finished thing, you know, almost finished thing.
joe rogan
And then put lyrics to it.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Get the melodies in place, get the rhythms as if I'm an instrument.
joe rogan
Is that how you guys did that Fibonacci song?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, yeah.
joe rogan
Wow.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
That was a really unique undertaking.
What was the process behind that?
Did you say, hey, it would be a nifty idea to do something to a mathematical sequence?
maynard james keenan
Nope.
No, that was a complete accident.
I think it was Adam or Justin who had the riff, and at some point they were actually counting the riff, and it ended up being in 789. I think it was like a...
A measure of seven, a measure of nine.
I'm not sure how you would actually write that out in notation, but I think 789 is a Fibonacci number.
Just that, you know, the actual 789, I think.
I think.
I have to look at it again.
joe rogan
It might be 987. For people who don't know what the fuck we're talking about, the Fibonacci sequence is a very unique mathematical sequence that appears in nature.
It's in fractals.
It's in sunflowers.
If you look at, like, the pattern of sunflower seeds, if you look at nautilus shells, and what it is, it's an expanding fractal sort of a mathematical equation.
I don't know if I'm saying it correctly, but it's like...
The first step is zero, and then there's one, and then there's one, one, two, three, five, eight.
Two plus, yeah, and it just keeps going on.
maynard james keenan
But that's the Fibonacci number, like the whole number, like actual number sequence.
There's the phi ratio, 1.618, anything multiplied by the 1.618, or not multiplied, the relationship.
The difference in the length from this finger to this finger as opposed to this finger to that finger, those knuckles and your digits, those are all in that relationship of 1.618, the phi relationship, so the fractals.
As it's growing, that progression is that ratio.
joe rogan
And then the number breakdown is, as you said, it's 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13. Yeah, so like 1 plus 1 is 2, 2 plus 1 is 3, 3 plus 2 is 5, 5 plus 3 is 8. And it's like everything you count, you add what came before it.
maynard james keenan
You've got a spiral picture of Giza Plateau showing you the...
joe rogan
Well, also facial structure, which is really fascinating.
There's something about human facial structure that uses the Fibonacci sequence, and I read somewhere about why people recognize plastic surgery while it disturbs them.
maynard james keenan
Boom.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's like, what's going on with the sequence?
Like, the sequence is off.
maynard james keenan
So my friend...
joe rogan
Yeah, here it is.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, my friend...
joe rogan
The Fibonacci relationships of the human head.
maynard james keenan
I had a friend who said, you know how when you know a family has had a child who has Down syndrome, it crosses racial divides.
You can tell this family has had, that that child has Down syndrome.
There's a look that goes along with it.
He said it's the same look.
Not the same look, but it's the same recognition of people who have had Facial plastic surgery.
You recognize you're not fooling anybody.
You've done a thing that's recognizable universally as wrong.
Something's wrong with your face.
joe rogan
Something isn't off.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, it's off.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
But I thought it was funny that he was actually connecting it to Down.
No disrespect to people with Down syndrome, but...
joe rogan
Yeah, I know what you're saying.
Yeah, but it is like, when you see someone with a disease, like, oh, there's clearly an error here in the code.
maynard james keenan
Yes.
unidentified
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
And the facial reconstruction, like the plastic surgery, because I'm just, oh, shit, I'm getting older.
unidentified
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
This will fool them.
joe rogan
Well, the nose thing, too, is weird.
Like, when someone has a uniquely small nose and their face, you know, they might have a long, like, Ari Shaffir-type face, but then they have this, like, shrunken down nose.
You're like, hey.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Like, this seems fucked.
unidentified
Right.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
There's a ratio that's supposed to exist, and it doesn't exist.
Why are your lips...
maynard james keenan
But, you know, in a way, a song like La Torella's with the Fibonacci thing, I feel like I kind of pulled a very pedestrian, sophomoric move by including those numbers in there, because in general, music is...
The Phi Ratio.
Everything that, all nature, all these things we're talking about, it's already here.
By pointing it out, like, staring at it and pointing at it with those numbers present and the way that the numbers and the lyrics are, I feel like that, you know, it's good to let people know about it, but I almost feel like it was kind of a, it was kind of a dick joke, in a way.
It's, um, I could do better.
joe rogan
That's interesting.
Are you one of those ruthlessly introspective guys?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, probably so.
Yeah, probably so.
joe rogan
Anybody who's any good at anything does that.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
There's no other way around it.
maynard james keenan
Good thing I'm not good at anything.
joe rogan
It's almost like you have a guard dog, but you turn on yourself.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Sit.
joe rogan
You know what I mean?
It's like, you know, like, figure out what's wrong with me.
Get him.
I mean, me.
Get me.
And then you, uh, yeah.
Fuh, you're fucked.
I'm my own guard dog.
One shot to the dome.
I break the guard.
I punch through the guard.
My shots go through your guard.
Keep your hands up.
maynard james keenan
Okay, that's enough, Connor.
unidentified
Come on over here.
joe rogan
Ah, you're fucked.
Everyone's fucked.
That's a characteristic that I see in almost everybody that I respect.
They all think that everything they do sucks.
Or at least they have very, very high standards and are often disappointed by their own work.
maynard james keenan
Well, you know, I think I have some of that, but I also have that idea of, like, it's something that my father...
I don't know if I talked about my dad with you, but he was my wrestling coach in high school.
He was also my earth science, biology, and environmental studies teacher.
unidentified
Really?
maynard james keenan
He was my teacher.
joe rogan
What a drag.
You went to school with your dad being the teacher?
That would be fucking hard.
maynard james keenan
But I learned a lot because he was no joke.
He didn't pull any punches from me.
He drove me as hard, if not harder, than his other students.
He didn't show any favoritism.
But one of the things that was always his thing on the mat, and I'm kind of paraphrasing, but basically you either win or you learn, especially in that high school or college setting.
You're You're learning about yourself.
If you went out there and you got your ass handed to you and you just got beat and didn't learn anything, well, yeah, you're a fucking loser.
You take the moment, reflect on it, build on what you did wrong, and now you're actually, in a way, you've won.
Now you know more about yourself.
You know about more your limitations or what you need to improve and expand your talents or your limitations.
So...
I guess whenever I'm doing a thing, I'm always looking at it from a learning perspective.
So there aren't necessarily mistakes unless they're fatal.
And then you wouldn't know anyway.
So, whatever.
joe rogan
That really is the right way to look at everything.
You win or you learn.
You know, you have great experiences because you're successful, or you have very beneficial experiences because you realized what went wrong.
It's just one more wrinkle, one more piece of information, or one more experience that you can add to your database of knowledge, and it'll make you better at everything you do.
maynard james keenan
So that, in a lot of ways, that's my biggest frustration in life, is when there is something that kind of goes wrong.
And I can't figure out what it was.
That's frustrating for me because I can't build on it.
I can't learn from it, but I don't understand what went wrong.
Whether it's a relationship or whether it's something I tried to build or something I did.
joe rogan
How often does that happen?
maynard james keenan
A lot.
You know, there's a couple of times I've actually had an opportunity to do a vocal with somebody else as a guest singer.
And I, you know, rehearsal was great.
And then you blew it for the main event.
And I'm like, what did I do wrong?
I did everything the same.
And until you can actually pinpoint that and figure out what it was...
I'm a fucking mess like I'm sleeping.
I'm waking up in the middle of the night trying to figure out What the fuck went wrong?
joe rogan
Yeah, that's the same with comedy cut.
It's one flub joke or one one premise that you botched and just Yeah, you wake up.
I'll wake up to pee and go fuck, you know, just I have to go downstairs and get in front of the computer And just start writing again, you know, just get angry.
I gotta fix this fucking thing I gotta figure out what's wrong with it.
I gotta make it bulletproof and Yeah, you're a unique guy in that you're all these different things that you're doing.
I feel like they kind of like work synergistically.
maynard james keenan
They have to.
joe rogan
Yeah, I don't feel like you're going, I don't think like you're battling yourself.
I know people that are battling themselves, you know, with all the different things.
maynard james keenan
No, I think...
This all feeds everything.
I'm a storyteller, so I'm involved in a lot of life.
I'm doing things on many levels because in order to tell a full, more complete picture, a better story, having more information, a good actor is going to do his research on the character beyond the character.
He's going to find out about the region the character is supposedly from and their family's history.
They're going to add all these things in so that when they have their one line, all that history is behind their eyes.
So I feel like that's, you know, for writing, for winemaking, they're all crossing over together.
They're all feeding each other to make it a whole presentation.
joe rogan
Yeah, when you're managing the You know a crop of grapes and putting together a wine and you got a restaurant going on you're working on your jujitsu and then you're writing songs You're living all these different experiences.
You have so much feeding into your consciousness There's so many variables that you're attending to that it just keeps your mind sharp and fresh and and it creates I mean, not necessarily like conflict, but issues.
There's live things that need to be figured out and solutions need to be created for problems.
It's not like there's something that happens to certain people, they get too locked into one thing, I feel, that they just run out of juice, they run out of things to discuss, they run out of perspective.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, you know, during the 70s, 80s era of music coming out, first two records are probably, those people spent their whole lives writing those two records.
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
And the third record's all about the bus, or the travel, or the shitty record label, or manager, like...
It's all the road.
That's the road album, right?
Because where the fuck have they been for the last three years but in a bus or in an airport and hotel?
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
So those albums end up being the ones that either make or break the band as far as getting past those things.
And generally, I'm speaking very generally, of course.
joe rogan
Yeah, but it's the same with comics.
With comics, it's usually you have one or two good specials and then there's a big drop-off.
You know, I think it's guys run out of stuff to talk about and usually you work for like Ten years before you do anything before you release anything.
They're the best guys It seems like they worked like ten ten years and then they put out an album Or a comedy special or whatever it is and then you just your your life is about performing your life is about doing that thing and you don't have enough Options outside of that like a lot of comics turn to airline jokes and you know and things like Hotels and you start talking about that like that's your experience.
It's constantly being on what's what you're exposed to talk about what you know right what you know Yeah, and that's what you all you know now is a fucking delayed flight But I don't know anybody else who's doing it like your way, like rock-style way, also runs a vineyard, also regularly-trained jiu-jitsu.
maynard james keenan
Daniel Day-Lewis.
joe rogan
Sort of, right?
maynard james keenan
Makes hats or something.
joe rogan
Yeah, yeah, makes shoes, I think.
unidentified
Shoes?
joe rogan
Yeah.
Shots.
maynard james keenan
Shoes.
joe rogan
I want a pair of Daniel Day-Lewis shoes.
Isn't that what he's doing?
I feel like he's making shoes.
maynard james keenan
A lot of actors I've met that have gotten on a role with a good series, a TV series, a lot of them will say the same thing.
About a couple of seasons in, you start looking at the door because your acting muscle can start to atrophy if you're only...
Being this guy on that show for eight years.
joe rogan
Do they start going crazy and going into drugs and buying houses?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Yeah.
So you start to do that little spiral.
So, you know, to get out and be able to do a few films.
A lot of, like, William Peterson was on CSI, the Vegas CSI forever.
He does theater now.
joe rogan
Yeah, I would think he would have to.
That's the guy from To Live and Die in L.A. People forgot about that movie.
maynard james keenan
Manhunter.
joe rogan
Yeah, that was the original Hannibal Lecter movie with a different guy than Anthony Hopkins.
It was a great movie.
maynard james keenan
Great.
joe rogan
That's a forgotten movie.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
To live and die in LA is a forgotten movie.
That is a great fucking movie.
maynard james keenan
Brian Cox is Dr. Lecter.
joe rogan
There he is.
What a handsome bastard back then.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Look at him.
maynard james keenan
And he's just sharpening his chops on the theater stage because he's a true, that guy's a real deal.
But he's on CSI to get PAID! Yeah, I guess initially, I think most likely when that whole new era of TV was coming out, it probably seemed like a good idea for him to kind of just, you know, he probably had some bills to pay and he wanted to get on there, thinking it was going to be a couple seasons and he's going to get out of there, but then you're under contract and they're going, we'll keep you around if you do this, but I want to do this theater thing.
I want to go do, you know, Shakespeare in the park.
joe rogan
And they'll punish you if you leave, too.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
The Black Bayou.
This motherfucker will leave a series when it's hot.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Yeah, so...
joe rogan
You ruined it.
maynard james keenan
I don't know.
I don't know him.
I don't know his decisions.
But I think, speaking to a lot of different people that have been in this situation, it's definitely...
You're kind of weighing it out.
Like, if I just stick with this thing for six seasons, eight seasons, I have enough money in the bank for the rest of my life.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
And then I'll have to fight my way back in a couple years of detoxing from that very...
It could be a great situation.
joe rogan
Yeah, well, I think it makes people go crazy.
I think that's what happened to Johnny Depp.
You know, Johnny Depp, when he started doing those Pirates of the Caribbean movies, you know, it's interesting, like, Johnny Depp at one point in time, and I'm a Johnny Depp fan, I think he's a great actor, seems like a wild dude, and he's buddies with my friend Stan Hope, and Stan Hope loves him, so he's got to be a good guy.
maynard james keenan
I have a lot of mutual friends.
I've never actually...
I met him a long, long, long, long time ago, but I don't...
joe rogan
He used to do these weird projects, strange movies, and he even said once, I don't want to be Blockbuster Boy.
Yeah, Dead Man.
Dead Man is incredible.
Yeah, that black and white western.
maynard james keenan
Arizona Dream.
Check that one out.
joe rogan
That's right.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, fantastic.
joe rogan
He did a lot of really cool weird projects and then he did the Pirates of the Caribbean and that fucking group of movies has been so wildly successful that he's just made ungodly amounts of money to the point where he was spending so much fucking money they had some breakdown because he's involved in some lawsuit with his former manager.
He's suing his former manager.
He was spending $150,000 a month on private security, 24 hours a day.
He was spending $200,000 a month on private jets.
And then just going on and on and on.
He had a staff of 40 people.
The manager?
No.
maynard james keenan
Johnny Depp.
joe rogan
Johnny Depp.
A staff of 40 people.
Maintained something like 15 different homes all over the world.
Just balling out of control.
Just so balling out of control.
Bring in fucking corner.
maynard james keenan
No, we can bring him in now.
joe rogan
What is this?
Among his most extravagant expenses listed in the countersuit were $3 million spent to blast Hunter Thompson's ashes out of a cannon and $30,000 a month spent on wine, the New York Post gossip column Page Six reported.
Yeah, well, they're the same cunts that said that Ronda Rousey and Travis Brown are washed-up losers.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
I don't know if they're right.
What is this house they're showing us?
maynard james keenan
What about paid, though?
Let's talk about...
joe rogan
He's kidding.
unidentified
Pay!
joe rogan
Blow up like the world trade.
Johnny Depp Chateau in the south of France.
Why does the Chateau have a restaurant with an awning and a logo on it?
That doesn't even make sense.
Does it have his own restaurant?
How baller is that?
maynard james keenan
You're overthinking it.
joe rogan
Maybe it's his own restaurant.
maynard james keenan
I have my own restaurant.
joe rogan
Yeah, but I mean, like, for himself only.
Like, he shows up.
Oh, a table for two, sir?
Yeah.
unidentified
There he is.
maynard james keenan
Can I get on the list?
joe rogan
A strange character.
He's a strange character.
I think that's what happened.
He started buying all that shit when he got that Pirates of the Caribbean money, because you don't really want to be Jack Sparrow every fucking day.
Like, I want to do something else.
You can't do something else.
And every time he does something else, it doesn't really work.
It doesn't really work.
Like the Pirates of the Caribbean guy does.
You know, like how many different movies has he done since he's done the Pirates of the Caribbean?
unidentified
Couple.
joe rogan
Couple?
Yeah, that's right.
He did Edward Scissorhands.
Oh, no, he did the Alice in Wonderland thing since the Pirates of the Caribbean.
That was actually really good.
It was weird.
maynard james keenan
I enjoyed it.
joe rogan
But I enjoyed it, yeah.
maynard james keenan
Willy Wonka.
joe rogan
Yeah.
There's a lot of weird shit.
Anyway, point being, they go crazy.
They just start, they start spending, buying, buying and spending.
Just get caught in that whirlwind.
maynard james keenan
Howard Hughes in a downward spiral.
joe rogan
What is this movie?
Oh, he's in the Lone Ranger.
That's right.
The ten worst Johnny Depp movies.
Wasn't that a guy that died and came back to life or something like that?
Or he had the Lone Ranger come back to life?
maynard james keenan
I don't know.
joe rogan
He helped him come back to life?
maynard james keenan
The Krill comes back to life or something.
joe rogan
I think that's cultural appropriation because I don't believe that he's Indian, so I'm offended.
How come they couldn't get a Native American to play the Indian?
maynard james keenan
Piece of shit.
Yeah, I have a hard time with all that.
So...
Okay.
You own guns.
joe rogan
Yes.
maynard james keenan
Okay.
But you're a pot smoker.
joe rogan
Yes.
maynard james keenan
Would you consider yourself a liberal?
joe rogan
I'm more liberal than I am conservative, for sure.
maynard james keenan
Okay.
So there's that balance.
You think the...
McRibs.
Like that, you know, don't call me.
I would like to be now from out, you know, I'm an avocado.
I relate to avocados.
So as my sexuality, I relate to an avocado.
joe rogan
I think you're allowed to identify as an avocado now.
maynard james keenan
Okay.
So that thing, just, you know, again, we need a meat ear.
I guess what it comes down to.
joe rogan
What are you talking about with guns and avocados?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, but like, you know, just that whole politically correct thing, but then the anti-intellectualism that comes from what I would consider the lower right.
joe rogan
Yeah, there's a far right that it does go anti-intellectualism, and then there's a far left that even though they might be more well-read and maybe intellectual, they put up these blinders.
I mean, there's not a lot of, like, across-the-board objectivity.
There's a lot of people formulating these preformed patterns of opinions that, you know, conservative opinions and just clinging to it or liberal opinions and clinging to it.
I think most people...
maynard james keenan
No gray area.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
After a meteor, lots of gray area.
joe rogan
A lot of gray area.
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Meteor.
joe rogan
I think most people really share, like, ideas that are conservative and liberal.
And I think what's really important, we should be able to discuss these ideas without digging our heels in and just, like, being fully committed to one team or the other team.
That's where the problem lies.
People are so tribal.
Whether it's conservative or liberal, even libertarian, they go real tribal.
And they just, like, lock onto those ideas, and this is right, and that is wrong, and, you know, and it just, people don't want, they don't want to give in.
And so then they fight, and they dig their heels in, and they, you know, they fight their opinion.
maynard james keenan
I'm an armed snowflake.
Is that a new category?
joe rogan
You could do that.
Yeah.
You should be able to do that.
Why not?
So who could stop you from being an armed snowflake?
You have bullets and shit.
You know, regular snowflakes don't have bullets.
maynard james keenan
Superman?
joe rogan
You know, I think, man, I think we're moving into a new stage of humanity, as profound and ridiculous and verbose as that sounds.
I really think that's what's going on, and I think all this infighting and squabbling is we're trying to find our footing.
Trying to figure out what we are and what we're doing.
And guns are a part of that.
It's like, should you be allowed to just have that?
Like, I don't know.
Every now and then it goes wrong.
Well, if it goes wrong, wouldn't you want to be able to protect yourself?
Yeah, you got a point.
No, you don't have a point.
No one should have one.
Yeah, but what about when the bad people come?
Should you have one then?
No.
Should you let the bad people kill you?
And then it's all bad people alive and the good people are dead.
Well, who's to determine?
What if a good person gets a hold of it and they do a bad thing?
Like, there's all these variables.
But I don't think it's that cut and dry, and I also think it's a lot like everything else.
maynard james keenan
Meteor.
joe rogan
Meteor, maybe.
What part?
If you were looking at a part of the world without pissing anybody off.
maynard james keenan
Without pissing anybody off.
joe rogan
See, if it hits China, we're not going to care.
We're like a billion people, so we lost a half a million.
maynard james keenan
I'm not opening my fucking mouth.
joe rogan
It would have to wipe out, like, Latvia.
Like, boom!
And then barely missed Scotland.
maynard james keenan
Or like that show, have you seen, did you watch The Leftovers?
joe rogan
Yes, I watched the first episode.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, it's, I like, you know, I think the, I love watching actors flex their muscle.
I love it.
So, I love that series because...
joe rogan
Does it get better?
After the first episode, they're like setting a bunch of stuff up.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of setup.
But just the concept.
Right away, storyteller, I love a good story.
A huge percentage of the population just fucking vanishes with no explanation.
I'm in.
I'm in.
And all the psychological and all the religious stuff that unfolds and collapses and builds up and freaks out based on that.
I think if we're going to do something like that...
It would have to be spontaneous combustion from a percentage of the globe.
Across the board, no...
joe rogan
There's bursting in flames.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
That's a real thing apparently, right?
maynard james keenan
5% of the population spontaneously combusting at the same time across the globe in front of people.
And no explanation.
joe rogan
No explanation.
maynard james keenan
Now, we're going to talk.
joe rogan
I don't think that's enough.
I think something's got to hit us.
Because then you'd be like, well, obviously I'm not one of those people.
maynard james keenan
Because you're from the UFC camp.
You want to see people.
joe rogan
Maybe.
Ah, fuck you and fuck your hits.
I'm all for people burning.
Remember when we were kids, spontaneous combustion was a thing.
You would wonder.
Maybe one of your friends would burst into flames while you're in school.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, when they're lighting farts or something.
joe rogan
Is that real?
Spontaneous human combustion?
Is it truly real?
maynard james keenan
I don't know.
joe rogan
How spontaneous human combustion works.
Can you make that a little bigger so I can read it?
In December 1966, the body of a 96-year-old Dr. J. Irving Bentley was discovered in his Pennsylvania home by a meter reader.
Actually, only part of Dr. Bentley's leg and slippered foot were found.
The rest of his body had been burned to ashes.
A hole in the bathroom floor was the only evidence of the fire that had killed him.
The rest of the house remained perfectly intact.
Can I make that a little bigger?
How could a man catch fire with no apparent source of a spark or flame and then burn so completely without igniting anything around him?
maynard james keenan
Said the Washington Post.
joe rogan
Yeah, Dr. Bentley's case and several hundred others like it have been labeled spontaneous human combustion, although he and other victims of the phenomenon burned almost completely.
Their surroundings and even sometimes their clothes remained virtually untouched.
Well, that's just fucking bullshit.
What website is this?
Listen, bitch, if you're on fire, you're fucking...
Clothes are gonna catch fire, too.
Unless someone's using pixie magic on you.
Did you get hit with a magic wand wielded by an elf, you cunt?
Your fucking clothes are gonna burn, stupid.
If you're burning, your clothes are burning.
This is horseshit.
jamie vernon
Here's what science says.
joe rogan
Okay.
If spontaneous human combustion isn't real, then what really occurred to the many pictures that exist of charred bodies, a possible explanation is the wick effect, which proposes that the body, when lit by a cigarette, smolding, ember, or other heat source, acts much like an inside-out candle.
A candle is composed of a wick on the inside, surrounded by a wax made of flammable fatty acids.
The wax ignites the wick and keeps it burning.
In the human body, the body's fat acts as a flammable substance, and the victim's clothing or hair acts as the wick.
As the fat melts from the heat, it soaks into the clothing and acts as a wax-like substance to keep the wick burning slowly.
Scientists say this is why the victim's bodies are destroyed, yet their surroundings are barely burnt.
Whoa.
So they're so fat that we become like a big greasy candle.
jamie vernon
It says no one's ever conclusively proven or disproven.
joe rogan
The truth of spontaneous human combustion.
But most scientists say that there are more likely explanations for the charred remains.
Like, your wife fucking hates you, she hit you in the head with a frying pan, lit your ass on fire, threw you in the tub, and say, I don't even know what happened!
I think it's one of them Ripleys believe it or not things!
And then, you know, she's seen in the embrace of the hardware store manager.
unidentified
I was crying and Stanley helped me.
maynard james keenan
Watching the detectives.
joe rogan
Yeah, I don't think it's real.
I cry bullshit.
maynard james keenan
And that's why it would make so much more of an impact if it happened to 5% of the population randomly.
Not good, no.
joe rogan
I think an outside threat for another planet, like an impact, is like a wake-up call.
But think about it.
maynard james keenan
Right now, if aliens showed up and started shooting people from spaceships, everyone's gonna go, that's bullshit, that's the government.
joe rogan
Could be, right?
But an asteroid, you realize the government can't recreate something the size of a city.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
It's slamming into the planet.
That's what's going to happen.
Yeah, but it's weird.
Like, we care in a big way how people die, right?
Like, 9-11 was huge because people caused 3,000 people to die and the world changed radically because of those 3,000 deaths.
But...
Half a million people die every year because of cigarettes.
A half a million just in this country alone.
And we're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.
Like, it doesn't bother us that you die that way.
Or you die choking on pus-filled lungs in some sort of urgent care center.
That doesn't bother us as much.
Like, that's, eh, shouldn't have smoked.
But you get caught in the 500th floor of some fucking skyscraper and get hit in the face of a plane.
maynard james keenan
There's a lot of good books on those kind of things.
Just something like the Holocaust in general.
Just the intent and the focus and the hatred toward a specific group of people.
It has way more impact than the cigarette.
The cigarette smoke, the cigarettes don't have...
They're not angry and they're not hateful.
unidentified
Right.
maynard james keenan
So that death is not...
It doesn't hurt you as much as if you...
The impact of a group of people hating another group of people so much that they...
Kill them in a mass, you know, in a mass event.
joe rogan
It's kind of insidious, though, if you really look at it objectively.
Like, it's okay as long as they peacefully suck the vitality out of your body with chemical-dipped plants wrapped in paper that they trick you into sucking on once you light them on fire, and your body becomes accustomed and addicted to it.
And we're like, hey, it's a stress-relieving choice.
maynard james keenan
He looks great.
joe rogan
Don't smoke too much.
unidentified
Just as long as you only smoke a little, you'll be fine.
maynard james keenan
What are the statistics on that, like, secondhand?
joe rogan
Secondhand's bad, too.
People, waitresses and stuff, and bars, they would get a lot of them would get cancer.
People that lived with people that were chronic smokers, but they weren't smokers themselves, a lot of them got cancer.
Secondhand smoke, especially in the small and closed areas, real as fuck.
It's not as bad as the cigarettes themselves, but...
maynard james keenan
We should have seen the first clue would have been, like, as soon as they pulled smoking off of planes.
joe rogan
Oh, yeah.
maynard james keenan
There must be a problem.
joe rogan
Dude, planes are ridiculous.
maynard james keenan
Because you're having to pay for some flight attendant's cancer.
Yeah, that would be why.
joe rogan
Those things were ridiculous.
I remember.
There used to be a little smoke in the back.
And if you...
maynard james keenan
Smoking section.
unidentified
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Non-smoking section.
joe rogan
Separated by space.
That's it.
Separated in a tube.
Secondhand smoke causes approximately 7,333 deaths from lung cancer and 33,950 deaths from heart disease every year.
Between 64 and 2014, 2.5 million people died from exposure to secondhand smoke.
So it's not quite as bad.
It's about, you know, 20,000 as opposed to 500,000.
But still...
It's terrible.
maynard james keenan
It's still a lot.
joe rogan
Yeah.
It's not as bad, but it's still fucking terrible.
It's weird.
maynard james keenan
He's like searching.
What are you doing while we're not talking about that?
joe rogan
Constantly.
He's got Siri on his phone.
Hey, Siri.
What's going on with satellites?
Are they real?
Hey, Siri.
What's up with that ice wall in Antarctica?
jamie vernon
A big chunk just broke off.
joe rogan
Oh my god, yeah.
There's a fucking chunk of ice that they've been monitoring.
A glacier.
That's the biggest glacier the world has ever known.
It is the size of Delaware.
And it's floating around in the ocean now.
It is so unbelievably massive.
You could be standing on this glacier and not see the end of it.
You wouldn't see how far it goes.
And it's floating in this iceberg, I should say.
It's floating.
It broke off.
jamie vernon
Ten things that are smaller than the iceberg right here.
joe rogan
Jesus Christ, it's so big.
It's smaller than the Grand Canyon.
The Grand Canyon is smaller.
The Great Salt Lake is smaller.
Long Island is smaller.
Luxembourg is smaller.
Lake Okeechobee in Florida is smaller.
Los Angeles is smaller than this fucking iceberg.
Lake Champlain in New York is smaller.
New York City is smaller than this fucking earthquake.
Earthquake.
This iceberg.
That's insane.
So it's separated.
Do they have a satellite image of this thing?
It's separated and floated off and it's gonna come slamming right into the Santa Monica Pier.
Look at that.
You can see it as they fly over it.
Oh my god.
Look at that photo.
That's fucking insane.
The photo is someone took it from a plane.
You're looking down with the wings.
And where was it?
Was it in Greenland?
Where did it break off?
Antarctica?
Antarctica.
Is that the ice wall that separates us from the flat earth?
There's all these assholes that say you can't fly over Antarctica online.
You absolutely can, you piece of shit.
Not only that, Anthony Bourdain just filmed a show from there.
He was in Antarctica, you dumb cunts.
He filmed the show.
He landed in Antarctica.
He talked to the people that work in the science department there, whatever the fuck they do, running experiments, trying to keep the Russians from invading.
unidentified
Mm-hmm.
joe rogan
All that.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
We should get him to Jerome.
joe rogan
Jerome?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, let's get him to come try the wine, take him out of the vineyards, and we have the training.
joe rogan
Yeah, you want to roll with him, huh?
maynard james keenan
No, I think it would be a good show to combine the wine, the pasta, the local food.
joe rogan
I sense competitive aggression from you.
maynard james keenan
No, no.
You're sensing that because you're projecting it.
joe rogan
No.
No, I don't have it.
I'm good.
unidentified
No, I think you're a scrappy little fella.
I'm not like, I'm sick on Anthony Bourdain.
maynard james keenan
Here's a $7,000 glass of wine.
joe rogan
That too.
Definitely want to get him up there, get him some good...
He would do it for sure.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
He would film at your place.
It'd be a good thing to do.
Maybe I could help orchestrate that.
maynard james keenan
Nudge it.
joe rogan
That'd be a dopey...
Dopey.
A dope...
That'd be a dope episode for his show, you know?
And you also have a very unique story, too, like doing your thing out there in Arizona.
And look, man, for him, it's an opportunity to do some jiu-jitsu.
That guy's an addict.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
He does it every day.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, he's amazing.
joe rogan
Yeah, when we were in Montana, we filmed an episode of his show.
He went to...
Maybe it was Bozeman?
I think it was Bozeman.
He just found some local jujitsu club and was rolling with these guys.
He didn't even know them.
He just gets in there and starts training with them.
He's an animal.
maynard james keenan
That's awesome.
joe rogan
He doesn't fuck around.
He does it overseas, too.
unidentified
What's he weigh?
maynard james keenan
Like 180?
joe rogan
Well, he's very tall.
I think he's at least 6'3".
And he's thin.
He's lost a ton of weight.
He lost 30 pounds from doing jujitsu.
He was on all sorts of...
He was on statins for high blood pressure, high cholesterol because of his diet and sedentary lifestyle.
And, you know, he was like, well, you know, I have the choice between changing what I eat.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
And I don't want to do that.
I want to keep eating pork and all these delicious foods or taking these statins.
So he just decided to take the statins.
But once he started training jujitsu, he got off all that shit.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Just his body just responded to the demands.
Yeah.
Your body responds to the demands.
You know, I think that's one of the unheralded factors in people's obesity is not just the diet, which is a huge factor for sure, but also the requirements that you're asking of your body.
Bodies are not used to sitting around doing nothing.
maynard james keenan
Get up, go do.
joe rogan
Get up, go do.
maynard james keenan
Go weed.
Go walk.
unidentified
Get up, go do.
maynard james keenan
So, can I ask a USC question?
joe rogan
Yes, please do.
maynard james keenan
What's the Hollywood babble on over what happened with Nunez?
joe rogan
Well, she got something called sinusitis.
She has apparently like severe sinus infections that affect her balance and they get really bad.
And she got one the day of the weigh-ins.
She made it through the weigh-ins and then she was having like a serious episode.
To the point where they checked her into the hospital, and the word was that she wanted to compete, but her coaches did not want her to compete.
They're like, look, you're having a really hard time walking.
Apparently when your sinuses get really inflamed, it fucks with your equilibrium.
maynard james keenan
Inner ear, yeah.
joe rogan
This is second and third hand, by the way.
I didn't talk to her.
And, you know, that's what you'd have to do.
You'd have to have her talk about it.
But it's super unfortunate because that was, in my opinion, was the highest level women's MMA bout ever.
In terms of the overall ability of the two athletes.
I think Valentina Shevchenko and Amanda Nunes, they represent the peak.
This is the best we've ever seen.
Nunes is a ruthless knockout striker.
She beat the shit out of Ronda Rousey and she choked the shit out of Misha Tate.
She's a real legit black belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu knockout striker.
And then Valentina Shevchenko is a Muay Thai champion, ridiculous stand-up.
You know, she caught Juliana Pena with an arm bar from the guard.
Like, her ground game is nasty, too.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
I mean, Pena's legit.
For her to catch Pena with an arm bar, that's staggering.
And her striking is so good.
Like you saw in the Holly Holm fight, she shot Holly Holm down.
Whereas, like...
Holly Holm fucked up Jermaine Durandamy with a question mark kick, dropped her with a straight left hand.
She never had close to that kind of success against Valentina.
Valentina is super high level with her striking, her movement.
She fights southpaw and she has that beautiful check right hook that she throws that keeps everybody minding their P's and Q's.
She's in a super well-rounded game.
So it's really unfortunate that those two didn't go at it.
maynard james keenan
That was gonna be a good fight.
joe rogan
I think they're going to schedule it again for the event that is after the end of July event.
I think it's 2-15 they're going to schedule it for.
But then, you know, like Dana White said, now Amanda Nunes would never headline an event again.
I just don't think you can force someone to fight if she really did have a significant injury.
Like, they said that the doctors cleared her to fight.
You know, a significant illness, I should say.
They said the doctors cleared her to fight, but she chose not to.
That was like the company word.
But if she was that fucked up, I just can't imagine she wasn't that fucked up.
I mean, it's got to suck if you spent millions of dollars promoting a fight, and then here it is, and then people bought the pay-per-view, and then it falls apart, and you've got to give refunds, and I don't know what the fuck.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, well, welcome to...
Welcome to the music industry when it was at its big peak in the 90s and people were writing big checks for stuff and like, oh yeah, we're going to get Mariah Carey for millions of dollars.
Here's her thing.
And then she goes, she has a meltdown.
joe rogan
She went crazy, huh?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, and they're like, what did we just spend our money on?
What happened just now?
joe rogan
How did Mariah Carey go crazy?
What happened?
maynard james keenan
I don't know.
I think she had a meltdown.
Maybe she got a bad dick.
unidentified
Wow.
joe rogan
I just wonder if you catch a bad dick.
maynard james keenan
Wow.
Personally, I've never caught a bad dick.
joe rogan
Have you caught a good dick?
maynard james keenan
I have not, that I'm aware of, caught a big dick.
joe rogan
You catch an ambivalent dick?
maynard james keenan
I have not caught an ambivalent dick.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Keep going.
I mean, there might be one in there somewhere.
joe rogan
I wonder.
I wonder.
I mean, it's got to be a way.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I don't know.
But, you know, somebody wrote a big check.
You have an artist who had a meltdown, didn't deliver, because you're talking about we are merchants of emotion.
That's what we do.
joe rogan
Right.
And sometimes it can overwhelm you.
maynard james keenan
That is a volatile thing.
joe rogan
And it's a story as old as time.
maynard james keenan
And, you know, with fighters, one little dumb thing, walking up the stairs to the octagon, you can pull, you know, your ACL fucking separates from your body.
joe rogan
Yeah, you can slip.
Kevin Randleman was backstage preparing for a fight once, and he stepped on a pipe and slipped and fell on his head and was concussed.
Yeah, like right before the main event.
Right before the main event, he was walking backstage, he stepped on something, slipped, his leg went up on him, he hit his fucking head, and he was concussed, and they canceled the fight.
Yeah, that was like...
maynard james keenan
It's a fucking mess.
joe rogan
I want to say that was in 1997 or 1998 or somewhere around there, and everyone was like, what?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
That can happen, for sure.
And then for a fighter, there's so much about who they are is dependent upon their confidence and their state of mind.
And if she hears that the UFC has pissed at her, she had to pull out of the fight, and then they say that they'll never have her headlined at an event again, I mean, she goes from being this Superstar with two spectacular performances against the most popular women's fighters of all time.
Those two, between Misha Tate and Ronda Rousey, I would say, arguably, they're the most popular women fighters of all time.
Coincidentally, they're both the hottest.
How weird.
If you're going to be a chick and you've got to be a fighter, it helps a lot if you're hot.
Doesn't it?
maynard james keenan
I'm that hot and I'm not a chick.
joe rogan
I noticed both of those things.
I didn't want to bring it up, though.
I didn't want to rub your face in it.
Right.
But, yeah, I mean, who knows how she's going to bounce back from that.
It sucks.
It sucks for Valentina, too, right?
She gets through the weigh-ins.
She gets through the weight cut.
She gets through the training camp.
maynard james keenan
I liked that Holmes won in Singapore.
That was a wonderful...
joe rogan
That was great.
maynard james keenan
Boom.
unidentified
Boom.
joe rogan
Yeah.
That question mark kick, that same kick.
She throws that kick so well.
That's a sneaky-ass fucking kick, man.
When you think it's going to be a round kick to the body or a low kick, and then it comes up high and clangs you in the dome.
It's so good the way they throw that, too, because it comes in like this and then loops over.
Clang!
She might be the best in the world at it in MMA. Luke Rockhold's got a really good one, too.
He used it against Bisping in their first fight.
They throw it, and it's such an unusual motion of a kick.
It looks like it's coming up, and then it just goes whip over the top.
Pull up Luke Rockhold KO's Michael Bisping.
He actually dropped him with it, and then he caught him with a guillotine choke afterwards, and he tapped him with a guillotine.
But the way he throws that kick is fucking super sneaky, man.
maynard james keenan
So who's coming up?
There's a Maya fight coming up in there.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
UFC 199. Is this the right one?
Is this the one when he won?
Or is this the one...
I'm not sure.
This is the one where Bisping KOs him.
Yeah, see right there.
unidentified
Clank.
joe rogan
Yeah.
Go to the first one, their first fight.
Their first fight is the one.
He choked him out.
He didn't KO him.
But he clanged him with the question mark kick.
Yeah, don't go with KO. Versus Bisping won.
Yeah, guillotine.
Here it is.
maynard james keenan
You got jacked.
joe rogan
Yeah, this is some guy holding up a camera.
I did it, man!
The UFC takes a lot of those things down, I think.
Rockhold, guillotine, choke, first time Bisping taps.
Yeah, this is it, because he was wearing a beard at the time.
Interesting that they fought two times, you know?
And then Rockwell thought it was going to be an easy fight the second time and he got fucked up.
I think it's...
maynard james keenan
Right before that?
joe rogan
I don't know.
It's hard to tell.
But anyway, it's such an unusual movement.
What is this?
Just a bunch of highlights?
There it is right there.
But they don't show the whole kick.
They just show the actual end of it as it's landing.
Eh, whatever.
You don't have to show it.
Point being, Holly has got one of the best.
She's interesting because she's a combination of a boxer.
She was like a world champion boxer.
I think like 18-time world champion boxer.
But she also has, like, traditional karate techniques.
She throws, like, a lot of side kicks and, like, these weird round kicks.
Yeah, she ki-eyes when she throws shots.
Yeah, there it is.
Cuck-clang!
maynard james keenan
Bang.
joe rogan
Yeah, and that was after Betch Cohea was kind of like taunting her.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
unidentified
Boink.
joe rogan
Whoopsies.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
That high kick, man.
That left high kick.
That's her highlight reel move, man.
That's the one that separated Ronda Rousey.
maynard james keenan
So did you get any crap for our arsonist video for me and me fighting Ronda Rousey?
joe rogan
No, nothing.
maynard james keenan
Good.
joe rogan
No.
maynard james keenan
Good.
joe rogan
No one gave me a hard time.
maynard james keenan
You know, I don't really know Holly or any of these guys, and they were the Fantastic Five in there.
I wasn't sure, like, I might come out like, you didn't realize I was the most Trump supporter?
Like, oh, crap.
joe rogan
No, everybody thought it was funny.
Like, it didn't...
You got away with that one.
But maybe now that we're talking about it, people are going to review it.
Because the standards over the last two months have probably changed.
And people have decided more things are offensive now than were then.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, hurry up, get on that, because, you know...
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Yell at me about that.
joe rogan
People are super uptight about what is offensive and what isn't offensive, and it moves.
It moves like the tide.
It comes in, it comes out.
There it is.
You can play it.
Want to play the whole thing?
unidentified
How many minutes is it?
maynard james keenan
Four minutes?
I don't know.
unidentified
But victorious and with my junk intact.
joe rogan
We know how good Ronda is.
This could be epic.
unidentified
That was Joe Rogan.
maynard james keenan
Not to be confused with Conor McGregor.
joe rogan
You gave Ronda Rousey a very manly appearance.
maynard james keenan
I did nothing of the sort.
joe rogan
What's going on here?
unidentified
This fat person.
maynard james keenan
Having a lunch.
for a specific diet.
joe rogan
For people at home, we're watching animation.
If you're just listening...
Rhonda's hitting the speed bag right now, looking very angry.
maynard james keenan
Mainer's taking steroids.
joe rogan
Mainer's shooting steroids into his fat ass.
maynard james keenan
Because I don't want to lose my junk.
joe rogan
I like how you have tits.
unidentified
I know.
joe rogan
Why'd you decide to have tits?
maynard james keenan
I have tits.
joe rogan
Do you have a problem with tits?
No, I don't.
Just on men.
I feel like it's gender appropriation.
maynard james keenan
It might be.
joe rogan
It is.
A man with tits?
If you don't claim transgender...
maynard james keenan
I got yelled at, like, what do you have against people that are, you know, like, transgender, like, you know, you're giving up your junk if you lose to Rhonda, like, that's a bad thing.
It's, okay.
In a bet, here's how it works.
You have something that you want to hang on to and keep.
I have something I want to hang on to and keep, whether it's money or whatever.
And the bet is that if you lose, you have to give up the thing that you want to keep.
You don't lose a bet and then give up something you were willing to get rid of anyway.
joe rogan
Of course.
maynard james keenan
So if you're a person who doesn't want your junk...
That's the choice you've made, then don't, you know, that's not really a bet.
But if you have a person who wants to hang on to your junk, and you bet your junk away, that's, I want my junk.
No disrespect to anybody who does not want their junk.
If you want to give away, if you want to cut your shit off, that's fine.
joe rogan
I don't care.
maynard james keenan
But I want, I would like to keep my junk.
joe rogan
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
As would my wife.
My wife wants me to keep my junk.
joe rogan
I think that's a really reasonable request.
In this video, you made Donald Trump to be a giant monster that must be put down.
maynard james keenan
Trumpzilla.
joe rogan
Now, do you worry that what they call now the Kathy Griffin effect could possibly happen when people get a hold of this video?
maynard james keenan
My career was over a long time ago.
joe rogan
I don't think her career's over.
I just think it's shifted.
maynard james keenan
It's shifted.
joe rogan
It's moved to a different place.
She's universally hated by the right.
She wasn't before.
She was just kind of Kathy Griffin.
Now she's like enemy of the state.
maynard james keenan
It's just her trying to be relevant and it didn't work.
joe rogan
Yeah, exactly, right?
That's exactly what it was.
Who is this one with the demon?
Is that his inner...
unidentified
It was supposed to be Misha Tate, but I was trying to be kind.
joe rogan
Oh, so you turned into a demon instead.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Because she came out and supported Trump.
Did she?
Yeah, she made some statements around that time.
joe rogan
Really?
maynard james keenan
But I was like, you know what?
She might have meant something else, so I made them.
Because it used to have her name under her there.
As the Trump minion.
joe rogan
I like how the hair is all crazy.
You get underneath the hair, it's like scalp, but it comes over the top and crushes you.
From two bald guys.
Don't you want to just talk to him about that hair?
And go, dude, you are wasting so much time and effort on that disaster.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
You're keeping on top of your head.
maynard james keenan
But it doesn't...
Again, it might be just part of the...
joe rogan
The thing.
maynard james keenan
It's a part of a thing.
unidentified
Right.
maynard james keenan
Like, just keep that going.
joe rogan
Like, the Don King thing.
Like, it's all part of...
Like, he's got to know people have better haircuts than him, right?
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
But he doesn't care.
maynard james keenan
Right.
joe rogan
It's maybe part of the whole...
maynard james keenan
If you're going to do it, do it like...
unidentified
Yeah.
maynard james keenan
Make it look like a hat.
For real hat.
joe rogan
Yeah, it's part of the whole theatrics is spraying everything down and locking it in place.
Oh, she got your balls in a jar.
That's very triggering.
maynard james keenan
That triggers you?
joe rogan
It's problematic.
You gotta be careful these days, man.
You can't have balls in a jar and make it seem like it's a bad thing if someone identifies with the type of person that wants to have their balls in a jar.
How do you feel about transracial people?
maynard james keenan
Meteor.
joe rogan
All of you.
maynard james keenan
I need a meteor for all of you.
Everybody.
joe rogan
Where does it hit?
Okay, let's say, if you're God...
maynard james keenan
You're going to make me say where it's going to hit, right?
joe rogan
Yeah, where does it go?
Where does it go that does the most...
maynard james keenan
How big is it?
joe rogan
It's huge.
No, five miles long would kill everybody.
That's like what killed the dinosaurs.
We need like a football field-sized meteor.
Like 100 yards.
North Pole is not good enough.
maynard james keenan
North Pole is going to cause effects around all of the shores below it.
unidentified
Interesting.
joe rogan
Let's look at the world.
Where do we hit it?
I'm looking at China, bro.
I feel like they could take the hit.
I feel like they need a solution anyway.
They've got a real problem.
There's a billion people over there.
maynard james keenan
So you're saying it has to be a populated area.
joe rogan
Uh-huh.
Yeah, but maybe, like, weird.
Like, maybe Yulin, like, right where they eat the dogs.
Maybe we go to the dog festival.
Just, and then, like, everybody goes, hey, man, maybe you shouldn't eat dogs.
God decided to hurl a meteor at all those assholes that are killing people's pets.
They're killing people.
maynard james keenan
What if it's five slightly smaller meteors and they hit every, like, most continents?
joe rogan
That's not a bad idea, but I think we need one big one, and I think that Yulin takes the hit.
I was watching these videos where they were capturing dogs, stealing people's pets, and they're cooking them.
It's like, boy.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, let's go there.
Let's just put it there.
joe rogan
That's the spot.
maynard james keenan
Let's just put it there.
joe rogan
Right where they make the dog meat.
Like, right as they're cooking up the dog meat.
maynard james keenan
Dog ramen.
unidentified
Speaking of which, I probably should go cook up my dog now.
joe rogan
What's that?
maynard james keenan
I took my dog to the groomer.
joe rogan
Did you really?
maynard james keenan
Oh, yeah.
joe rogan
You took your dog out here?
unidentified
Uh-huh.
joe rogan
Did you drive or do you fly?
maynard james keenan
I flew.
joe rogan
Do you put your dog in the bottom with the regular dogs?
maynard james keenan
No, she's with me.
joe rogan
So she sits with you?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Now, do you have to make sure that the person next to you isn't gravely allergic to dogs?
maynard james keenan
Does who have to make sure?
joe rogan
You.
maynard james keenan
Fuck them.
joe rogan
No?
Fuck them?
But you have to tell the airline, hey, I'm traveling with my emotional support dog because I'm very fragile.
maynard james keenan
I'm traveling with my emotional support dog because, in theory, perhaps this might have happened to someone that we might know.
You're getting on an airline and they look at you're paying for a dog to go on the flight, right?
I'm paying extra for the dog to go on the flight.
Sir, does your dog's thing fit under the seat in front of you?
unidentified
Does it fit?
maynard james keenan
Yes, it's regulation.
It's what you want under the seat in front of you.
Great.
Ooh, your other bag is too big, but that's my carry-on bag.
Yeah, but now that you're bringing a dog on, that is your carry-on bag, and that bag you have doesn't fit under the seat in front of you, which is where my dog's gonna be.
joe rogan
Right.
So what do you do?
maynard james keenan
So you had to check the bag.
joe rogan
So you check the bag, and the dog stays under the seat, but the dog doesn't really fit under the seat.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, she's 11 pounds.
She's small.
joe rogan
But you can't, like, stuff her into that crack where the laptop bag goes.
Really?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, she's small.
joe rogan
What kind of dog is it?
maynard james keenan
Yorkie.
joe rogan
Oh, okay.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
So the point is that if I had a personal item, that goes under the seat in front of me, and the rolling bag goes up in that upper space that you have paid for.
Right.
But they're telling me, like, no, the dog is now the carry-on bag.
So you want me to put my dog in the overhead bin?
No, it has to go under the seat in front of you.
But you told me that carry-on bags go in the overhead bin.
It's all this, like, red tape, catch-22 crap.
But is your dog an ESA? Is it an emotional support animal?
It can be.
Does it have to be?
Yeah, because if you have that, then we don't charge you anything, and you can actually bring on all three of those items.
Your dog, your carry-on, and your personal item.
Bring three bags on if your dog is an emotional support animal.
joe rogan
So, if you're not fucked up...
maynard james keenan
So, luckily for me, I can't Fly without my dog.
joe rogan
Oh, okay.
I get it.
I get it.
I think Natasha has that deal, too.
Natasha Leggero.
She has an emotional support dog.
Yeah, that's a gross loophole, and I applaud you for capitalizing on it.
It's the way to go.
Unless you're sitting next to someone who's, like, terribly allergic.
maynard james keenan
I'm gonna need a moment.
I need a moment.
joe rogan
Yeah, man.
Collect your emotions.
The dog's not even here to support you.
How do you get through a podcast with the dog?
maynard james keenan
I pretend that the American Werewolf in London was my dog back here.
joe rogan
That's a good move.
That's a good move.
Yeah, you get like a dog by proxy.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's weird.
Isn't it a weird thing?
That was never around when we were kids.
maynard james keenan
That's why I had to pull this out.
joe rogan
Emotional support dog because you're fucking weak.
Your mind is weak and you're fucked.
You're fucked.
You can't even go to the fucking Starbucks without bringing your dog in with you.
maynard james keenan
I think you're allowed to do that.
I mean, I think that's part of it.
Like, if you have the paperwork, you can go into places that you're not supposed to have it.
joe rogan
There's a restaurant that I go to that one of those ladies used to be hot back in the Disney, and now she used to be on that Desperate Housewives show.
Now she's kind of getting up there in the years and getting a little wackier and wackier, I'm sure, as time goes on.
She brings in a full-grown golden lab.
This silly bitch.
This dog is like sitting down where everybody's forks go.
It's dirty assholes touching the ground where people accidentally drop their spoon.
It's such a big dog.
It's so gross.
There's like something about a little dog sitting in someone's lap at a restaurant that's like...
It seems stupid, but maybe not so bad.
But a lab, a fucking 70-pound big-ass dog laying on the ground, and this crazy bitch is putting everybody else, imposing her situation on everybody else.
She knows it's nuts.
maynard james keenan
So do you think that people that go down that, and I think actors do this, that go down that hardcore ketogenic...
Diet that they cut all the carbs out of their diet and sugars.
Do you think if they do it long enough, they start to get a little dingy?
joe rogan
It could happen.
Definitely, you get the keto flu when you first start out.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I got that for a minute.
joe rogan
That could push people over the top.
But you've got to do it smart.
You can't work out too hard when you first start doing it, and you've got to take exogenous ketones.
That's helped me a tremendous amount.
maynard james keenan
What the fuck?
joe rogan
Exogenous ketones, ladies and gentlemen, there's a bunch of different companies.
The one I use is called Kegenix.
They have a new one called Kegenix Prime.
It's apparently even better.
But what it is, it's a bunch of amino acids and minerals and stuff that puts your body into a stated ketosis.
maynard james keenan
Okay.
joe rogan
And it allows you to balance out.
It's very good to balance out.
It gives you energy when you're sort of struggling through that keto flu thing.
And then eventually your body adapts.
Your body gets used to burning fat.
And then it just seems like it has more energy when you do that.
maynard james keenan
But for it to really truly be effective, don't you have to kind of work out like two hours a day to really make it flip?
joe rogan
No, no, no.
You could definitely make it flip without working out that much.
You don't have to work out that much.
You just, your body has to realize like, okay, carbs aren't coming in.
We're going to need to burn fats, which it has as a sort of a go-to way.
Like we've been eating fats and people have been relying on fats forever.
It's not a negative thing.
Like, people have this idea that the brain relies only on glucose.
maynard james keenan
But can you have any kind of carbs at all?
You have to get past a certain amount of time?
Or, like, these are people who have just given that up forever?
joe rogan
No, you can have some carbs.
Your body has a certain amount of flexibility to it.
But the way they've done it...
Well, here's a perfect example of how much biodiversity is.
Where it comes to your body's ability to absorb carbohydrates and how it reacts.
Rob Wolf, who is a scientist and a big paleo researcher guy, he's got an interesting Instagram page.
I think it's Das Rob Wolf.
Instagram.
But what he does is he'll eat something and he'll have his wife eat something and then they'll do these tests, you know, like blood tests to find out where their ketones are and whether or not they're in a ketogenic state.
And his body is like way more fragile in terms of like it's getting knocked off of ketosis than his wife's body.
His wife just rebounds better.
She has better genetics for it.
They obviously live together.
They're eating the same foods.
There's a lot of variables involved in how your body processes carbs.
It's like some people have celiac.
Some people are gluten sensitive.
Some people have no problem eating a big bowl of rice and they stay in ketosis.
And with some people that just knocks them right out of it and their body goes right back to burning carbs.
It depends also on how strict you've been in the ketogenic diet and how long you've done it for.
But there's a lot of critics of that diet, too.
There's a lot of people that cry bullshit on that.
I don't know if they're crying.
I think some of the people that cry bullshit, though, they don't really have much of a science background, and they're also been shown a certain way.
maynard james keenan
I combine three things.
I tried to stick as closely as I could to the ketogenic diet, but it probably wasn't a ketogenic diet.
I was just basically making sure that I wasn't eating any sugar any fruit any carbs yeah that I you know that I know of I was eating within a 10-hour window.
So if I got up at 10 a.m.
And I had anything to eat I didn't eat anything after eight And I was trying to work out, you know do something for an hour a day.
joe rogan
That's Well, that's a great combination of mostly ketogenic or ketogenic and the fasting.
What you're doing is intermittent fasting by going 14 hours every day without eating.
That apparently is a really good protocol for losing weight.
I've done it.
I like it.
I think it makes me feel good, too.
It puts your body in a good place.
Your body gets accustomed to only eating for eight hours a day.
And then the other hours, you just don't eat.
Just normal.
16 hours, you're just no eating.
maynard james keenan
It's a tough window for most people.
joe rogan
It is, but...
maynard james keenan
Especially on the road.
I'm like, I'm having to eat after I perform, and it's like, oh, that means I can't eat until afternoon.
joe rogan
I don't fuck with it on the road.
On the road, the most important thing to me is nutrition, sleep, and recovery.
And exercise.
If I don't exercise when I'm on the road, I get off.
Because, you know, the flying and everything, I feel like your body needs to exert in order to release endorphins and sort of like...
maynard james keenan
As soon as I walked in the door here, I grabbed the kettlebell because I just haven't been able to do any of that stuff for a minute.
And so I've been here, been basically on my back for the last three days.
I've got some weird stomach thing where...
I don't know, a bad piece of baked brie or something, and I felt like knives in my stomach for two days.
unidentified
I was down.
joe rogan
Baked brie?
Are you blaming it on cheese?
maynard james keenan
I'm blaming it on...
I was going to blame it on you, but...
joe rogan
Wow, I just got here, though.
You can't blame it on me.
maynard james keenan
It's code.
unidentified
Joe Rogan's code for baked brie.
maynard james keenan
I'm going to talk to baked brie again today.
joe rogan
Are you one of those raw cheese guys?
Do you prefer the raw cheese?
maynard james keenan
I like cheese.
I try not to eat a lot of it, just because, again, anything that's too much of anything is too much, so...
joe rogan
Yeah, I agree, but what I've found is that raw milk and raw cheese, in particular, both those things, I seem to digest them way easier than I do the pasteurized and homogenized versions.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I mean, but how are you getting it?
unidentified
Do they actually have that in the U.S.? Oh yeah, you can get raw cheese at Whole Foods.
maynard james keenan
Okay.
joe rogan
Yeah, they sell raw cheese.
maynard james keenan
There's so many.
Yeah, I can get the foreign.
Actually making cheese in the U.S. is an awful hurdle.
Is it?
Yeah, because they want you to pasteurize everything.
Cheese in the U.S. isn't nearly as wonderful and tasty as it is from overseas just because of all the process.
If you've actually had raw stuff from a farm, you go, check it out.
joe rogan
Dude, I had burrata cheese in Italy, and I was like, how do I get this home?
maynard james keenan
You don't.
You move to Italy.
joe rogan
Could you even take burrata on an airplane?
Would they let you?
maynard james keenan
Doubt it.
joe rogan
They might not, right?
maynard james keenan
Smuggle it.
joe rogan
Well, I had a friend who was French, and he came over from...
maynard james keenan
You're picturing it right now, right?
A little balloona.
joe rogan
I had a friend who was French, and he came over from France, and he had to hide his cheese, because he had raw cheese.
He had to hide it in his luggage.
So he had to, like, fold it up inside his pants, like these bricks of wheels of cheese.
He had to, like, put his pants...
Stuff it in his luggage to hide cheese.
maynard james keenan
Did he make it back in?
joe rogan
He made it back in.
maynard james keenan
What's his name in his ass dress?
joe rogan
I can't tell you.
He actually moved back to France.
He's like, fuck this place.
But when he lived here, they used to make this raw cheese and charcuterie plate.
They would cook raw cheese and melt it on different smoked meats.
I forget the name of the dish, but it was sensational.
And they would eat it with sauerkraut.
The art of eating.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
The art of eating and food.
It's a real art, right?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think the trick when you get into that, you start getting into that gluttonous activity with your world.
It's the moderation part because you get caught up in like more is better and cramming it in and just being able to slow down and actually enjoy those experiences without just...
joe rogan
Without going full-blown Gerard Depardieu.
maynard james keenan
If you put like a plate of prosciutto in front of me, I'm fucked for a week because I'll eat all of it.
joe rogan
I will too.
I eat that stuff a lot because it's healthy.
It's like if you get like real good, naturally cured, you get a lot of healthy fats from it.
It's a great way to, it's got a little package of protein.
You know, you just open it up and dig in there.
It's a good ketogenic snack.
maynard james keenan
I did that one.
joe rogan
Yeah.
I always recommend Mark Sisson's book, The Primal Blueprint.
And he's the guy, though, that came on the podcast, and apparently he's incorrect about some wine stuff.
maynard james keenan
Oh, yes.
joe rogan
Yeah, what did he say?
He was talking about chemicals that are in wine, and he made some mistakes, right?
maynard james keenan
Well, I think...
There's a lot of misconceptions about winemaking, commercial, large-scale winemaking.
I've seen a lot of things happen in cellars, large-scale cellars, that are not cutting corners.
There's just a lot of things that they have to do.
But there's this idea that there's all these things that we're adding...
To our wines.
joe rogan
Right, they give you headaches and fuck you up.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, so in our vineyard we do have copper sprays and things that are kind of, we're avoiding frost or we're avoiding bunch rot.
joe rogan
Copper sprays?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, it's a long story.
But, you know, it's organic stuff we're trying to do.
joe rogan
So it's actual copper?
maynard james keenan
I'm not sure if it's actual copper or not.
I would imagine it's, no.
joe rogan
Huh.
maynard james keenan
I don't know.
joe rogan
Okay.
maynard james keenan
I don't know the answer to that.
joe rogan
But that's just inorganic?
maynard james keenan
There's some things you're doing in the vineyard that are kind of organic practices that are acceptable.
But one of the things, when the fruit actually gets to the winery, I'm inoculating it with a packaged yeast.
So something that might be an isolated strain from Barolo or from Tuscany.
But other than that, at the end of the process, we'll add KMS, an SO2 solution to stabilize the wine and keep it bottled so it's safe in the bottle.
joe rogan
What does KMS stand for?
maynard james keenan
Sulfur.
We're adding sulfites to the wine.
But wine itself actually produces those byproducts.
We're just escalating it to make sure that this wine can make it on a truck to New Jersey or to whatever, and they blow off.
They go away.
joe rogan
But that's it.
maynard james keenan
That's all we're putting in.
Yeah, it basically just kind of preserves it.
And some places that are paranoid about where that wine is going and how long it's going to be sitting in a truck and maybe it's not going to be refrigerated, they're probably adding a little bit too much.
And there are some places that are actually adding, you know, other weird stuff, you know, enzymes and stuff into their wines.
In the process.
But in my cellar, it's basically, it's the yeast holes, it's the yeast, and at the end it's SO2. We're not doing any other weird additives.
So the idea that there's like all these chemicals and all these extra things we're jamming into our wines is ridiculous.
joe rogan
So it's just a misconception?
maynard james keenan
I think so, yeah.
joe rogan
Are there any wine companies that do that?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I'm sure.
Yeah, there's a lot of stuff.
People are adding, you know, they're adding what they call mega purple.
They're adding like tannins and they're adding color.
joe rogan
Oh, so mega purple?
maynard james keenan
They're adding like weird nutrients on this end and we're adding, you know, weird nutrients on that end and some nitrogen on this end.
They're adding a lot of extra stuff in the process that, you know, I don't do because we're doing very small batches of things.
joe rogan
I mean, they don't have to alert people what they're putting in either.
I mean, it's just wine.
You get a bottle of wine, you assume it's just wine.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, and I think that's changing.
I think the FDA is threatening to stick their nose into wineries now, which is a pain in the ass.
They want to know where everything's coming from and going to.
Really?
All the shit that's going on, you can deal with that?
unidentified
The government is going to fix the wine.
joe rogan
We're going to come in.
unidentified
Hey, Pussifer, what do you think you're doing with your wine?
maynard james keenan
Just what they've been doing for the last 3,000 years.
joe rogan
They were adding husks back then?
unidentified
Really?
Did they even know what husks were?
joe rogan
Yeah, so, um...
So when you're adding this stuff to the wine and you say that it burns off, like you're adding sulfites or sulfates?
maynard james keenan
Sulfur.
You're adding sulfur just as a preservative.
joe rogan
And it burns off.
Is there an ideal...
maynard james keenan
It blows off, I should say.
joe rogan
Okay.
When you bottle a wine, is there an ideal time after you bottle that wine where it should be consumed?
maynard james keenan
I mean you can bottle it the minute you can open it the minute it's bottle if you want to if you want to open it up right away.
joe rogan
But is there a where like does the like when we drank that wine from like 1924 or whatever the fuck it was is that good or is that different?
I mean, it's like if you have a wine that comes out.
maynard james keenan
This is a long conversation.
But, you know, wines, in theory, there's places that just the natural structure of that place, the pH, the acid balances of those places.
And depending on how well or not well the winemaker got out of the way to make sure that that wine made it into bottle, it was proper.
The storage of it, the cork, how that went.
There's so many, so many, so many variables.
But when you're talking about the track record of a particular site and a producer, there are wines that you just expect.
If I'm going to buy this Latour, I'm going to buy this fine Burgundy, you expect that that wine has been held to a standard for a long period of time, like throughout decades, millennia.
They have been consistent.
So you expect that I should be able to lay this wine down for 50 years and it should be okay.
It'll be different in 50 years, provided none of those other variables, like somebody didn't pull it out and leave it on the counter in the sun for a week and then put it back in the cellar and 50 years later you open it and it's crap.
joe rogan
Right.
That's all it would take, huh?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Is it heat or sun itself?
maynard james keenan
It could be cold.
It could be something that gets too cold.
It gets too dry.
The cork dries out.
It leaks.
Oxygen gets in.
Heat is your enemy.
Cold is your enemy.
Oxygen is your enemy.
joe rogan
So as long as it's treated correctly, it could last a long time and it'll just change and be different.
maynard james keenan
It'll evolve over time.
And there's definitely an arc to it.
There's definitely like, okay, that particular wine was ready.
There's a peak.
They should have drank it right then.
joe rogan
How do you know?
Do you know from reading, like, articles?
maynard james keenan
Again, it's, you know, it's...
That's why some guys buy a case or two cases of a wine that they know they're going to like, and they're trying them over time, and they're figuring it out.
And then they'll have that wine, and they'll go, hey, guys, I just had the tenth bottle of wine from those 24 bottles, and it's starting to go over the hill.
So there's a little forum or somebody calling each other back and forth going, hey, I think this particular wine has seen its best day.
And they'll get back online and somebody will go, no, mine's fine.
There'll be arguments about that.
But generally speaking, it's that communication of guys saying...
joe rogan
That's interesting.
So it requires a community of knowledgeable people to communicate about it.
I have a buddy of mine who's a fucking total wine nut.
He invited me to his birthday party, and it was a wine-tasting birthday party.
And they were all sitting around, and they would judge the wine afterwards.
It's very oaky.
There's hints of tannin.
And I'd be like, what in the fuck are you guys taking?
And one of them that they didn't like, they're like, this one's corked.
I think this one's corked.
I was like...
This one's my favorite.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
I really like this one.
You tell me it's bad?
It says, bad?
Like, how's it bad?
Like, how do you know it's bad?
Like, it seems like it's corked.
Does that drive you crazy?
maynard james keenan
It drives me crazy, yeah.
joe rogan
So there's like a level of pretentiousness that's acceptable.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, again, everybody wants to, everybody's trying to find their way in life and try to find what makes them better than or different than or separates them or elevates them.
joe rogan
His palate's amazing.
maynard james keenan
His palate is incredible.
joe rogan
He's going to be able to tell.
When he ties in and he gets some fat ass Orson Welles dude sitting there.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
After a couple glasses, if that thing's not really corked, I'm drinking it.
joe rogan
Yeah, right?
Especially after a couple glasses.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
In the olden days, they used to drink wine because water would go bad, right?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, well...
joe rogan
Still water, sit around, bacteria growth.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, still water, but also, you know, if you have in a situation where you have, like New Orleans, complete devastation of the water table, there's like decomposing bodies everywhere, and you can't drink the groundwater, you can't trust what's coming out of your well.
Yeah.
Fermented juice is what you...
We drink because it's safe because it's gone through a fermentation process, a process of purification, just like vodka, the water of life.
It's the water that doesn't freeze, so you can go through the tundra.
If you try to eat snow, you're going to freeze to death.
If you try to melt the snow you're building, if you do have a fire, but the actual water of vodka doesn't freeze, then you can actually survive.
You have to have water while you're walking through this frozen tundra.
joe rogan
And you get the benefit of being drunk all the time.
maynard james keenan
Drunk as fuck in a snowbank.
joe rogan
Yeah, like Vikings, they had a big-ass leather sack full of wine.
They were always hammered.
No wonder why they had such ridiculous behavior.
They were drunk all the time, right?
Eating mushrooms and drinking.
Yeah, mead.
That's wine, or that's beer that's made out of honey.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, honey, wine, beer.
joe rogan
Yeah, honey's a weird preservative, right?
Because it doesn't go bad, ever.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I like it.
joe rogan
Yeah, you could take things in honey, you stuff them in honey, and they just stay good.
They think that's one of the things that led to...
Like my iPhone 5. Does it work good on honey?
unidentified
What do you mean?
maynard james keenan
It's still preserved.
It doesn't look any different.
joe rogan
You still use an iPhone 5?
You're one of those guys?
maynard james keenan
Nah, it's an iPhone 6. I'm just kidding, man.
joe rogan
But you have a port for the headphones.
Headphone port.
Is that where you stop changing?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
That's where we draw the line?
maynard james keenan
I draw the line on the headphone port.
joe rogan
A lot of people do.
They're like, that's where I draw the line.
So mead...
I'd read something where they were speculating that one of the conversions from mushroom culture to mead culture...
They think that we used to be...
The intoxicants were primarily psychedelic, and then they went to alcohol at some point in human history.
And that might have coincided with people trying to preserve mushrooms in honey.
And then they produce some sort of a honey mushroom.
maynard james keenan
Chemical reaction where the honey actually fermented.
joe rogan
Yeah.
And then people started drinking mead and then mead culture changed the way people, alcohol culture, which is like a regressive, you know, losing inhibitions, wild culture.
Is there any movement to bring back those leather wine sacks?
You know, what are those things called?
Those things that the Vikings had?
You know those?
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
Carry them around, those leather sacks?
maynard james keenan
A bladder.
Yeah.
A wine bladder.
joe rogan
Any benefit to drinking your wine out of one of those?
It just looks good.
maynard james keenan
I need you to roll into an Augustine wine bar with a fucking bladder and a fucking horned helmet.
joe rogan
Right.
Drink your ale from one of those big-ass bullhorn things.
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
I mean, does anybody serve wine out of a leather thing?
I would feel like that's the next Mumford& Sons type thing to do.
maynard james keenan
Well, they do growlers, so if you walk into a beer bar, I think they allow you to bring in, if it's measured out, what that volume is, and you can refill your growler with beer.
joe rogan
Right.
maynard james keenan
I think some places do the same with wine.
The big issue is labeling.
So like, you know, the TTP gets all weird and the liquor department gets all weird because like, well, the bottle has all the labeling on it that I need to make sure that you're, are you pregnant?
unidentified
Right.
maynard james keenan
Because there's a warning on here about that.
So if you're just coming in and filling your growler with wine, I think the assumption is that at some point you, you know...
joe rogan
Violate the law.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I don't know.
Or not.
I don't know.
It seems kind of weird to me.
Yeah, just fill up.
Just let the guy fill up his thing.
joe rogan
Have you ever thought about experimenting with like a leather bladder for your wine to see if it influences the taste?
maynard james keenan
We did one for, not a leather one, but did like a plastic one for...
We do a wine garden.
joe rogan
What do you got there?
maynard james keenan
That's the bladder.
jamie vernon
It was the Rock on the Range.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, the Rock on the Range.
We did it at Aftershock.
We had like a wine, a Caduceus American wine booth.
We did one down in Florida for a couple of those festivals.
joe rogan
And does it affect the taste at all being in that?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I mean, well, you're in the middle of a field with a bunch of shitty bands playing.
It's going to taste different, you know?
It's just, it's hot and you're annoyed.
So, yeah, it's going to taste different.
You're going to drink it because you're annoyed.
Right.
joe rogan
Do you have recommended temperatures that your wine should be stored or served at?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I mean, just normal cellaring.
It'd be nice if you could put it at like 50 degrees in your wine cellar.
Good spot for it.
45 degrees.
joe rogan
That's what you want?
maynard james keenan
But you don't want to put it in your fridge because it's going to get too cold.
It will?
Yeah.
If you're going to drink it fairly right away, if you go to the store and you're going to get a bottle of wine, you want to cram it in the fridge for the day to open it up that night, that's fine.
But if you store your wine in the fridge, that's a little too cold.
joe rogan
Oh.
maynard james keenan
To be storing it.
joe rogan
I've done that before.
maynard james keenan
It's better than leaving it out, you know, on top of your fridge where it's going to get baked.
So it's kind of like way out your...
joe rogan
So if your house is 70 degrees, you shouldn't just leave it in your house?
maynard james keenan
Um, you can as long as it's gonna maintain 70. It's like when you go to a supermarket, though, and they have those like...
It's all sitting there, isn't it?
joe rogan
Yeah, they're not doing anything about that.
maynard james keenan
Why are you buying wine at a supermarket?
joe rogan
I don't know where else to buy it.
Where should I go?
maynard james keenan
A nice wine shop that's gonna...
joe rogan
It's so pretentious.
It's like going to one of those cigar bars, dealing with those guys.
maynard james keenan
Same thing.
It is.
I agree.
joe rogan
It's from Nicaragua.
Smell this cigar.
It's from Nicaragua.
maynard james keenan
Well, this producer uses a lot of natural fermentation and they, you know, they definitely do it, you know, with their feed and like blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
joe rogan
Dorks.
Baseball card dorks.
They're the same person.
Yeah, they're just going after wine instead of baseball cards.
maynard james keenan
Can I just have the fucking wine?
Yeah.
Give me a Negromadella and a lime and a bag of chips.
joe rogan
Ooh, Negromadella.
That's a good one.
Oh.
A bag of lime and chips?
maynard james keenan
A little lime, a little lime juice, and then a bag of chips.
joe rogan
Ooh, yeah.
unidentified
And a Maduro, like a dark cigar.
maynard james keenan
For the snack, let's do this.
Get yourself some chicharrones.
joe rogan
What is that?
maynard james keenan
Pork rinds.
joe rogan
Oh, okay.
Ooh, pork rinds.
I like them at a gas station.
maynard james keenan
A little bit of sour cream and a little bit of Valentino hot sauce on that.
You got cold, you got heat, you got crunch, you got salt, you got sweet from the cream.
joe rogan
Now are you one of those guys that will not drink a red wine with fish?
maynard james keenan
I'll drink, I don't, yeah.
I don't abide by those rules.
I've had red wines that go with all things and white wines that go with all things.
I'll try all of them.
But if the experience isn't working, I'll shift gears.
But I won't be afraid.
I won't go with a set rule going in.
joe rogan
There used to be a hard, fast rule, right?
Was it?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, kind of.
In general.
I think it's just more something to talk about at the grocery store.
unidentified
Mmm.
joe rogan
So it's like a fetish.
maynard james keenan
I'm having this for dinner.
What should I have?
unidentified
Hmm.
maynard james keenan
I think a red wine.
joe rogan
Like a pairing.
A good pairing.
maynard james keenan
A pair of these.
joe rogan
Some restaurants have a pairing with each selection.
And very rarely do you have a white wine with a bloody steak.
maynard james keenan
I do.
I'll do it.
unidentified
Do you?
joe rogan
You're crazy.
You're living on the edge, though.
maynard james keenan
I'm on the edge.
joe rogan
You're out there, man.
maynard james keenan
Right on the edge of the earth where it goes off.
joe rogan
Dude, we did three hours already.
It's already gone by.
unidentified
Alright.
joe rogan
Isn't that nuts?
maynard james keenan
Yeah, it's pretty crazy.
joe rogan
How the fuck does that happen?
maynard james keenan
Got a workout in.
Went over here and did your stretchy things in the back there.
joe rogan
Oh, did you?
unidentified
Yeah.
joe rogan
That thing with the back thing is amazing.
maynard james keenan
Yeah, I didn't do the one with the weights.
I just did the one we hang upside down.
joe rogan
That one with the weight.
I'll show it to you after we're done with this.
That thing is the shit.
Everybody should have one of those just for back maintenance.
maynard james keenan
Yeah.
joe rogan
It's goddamn epic.
maynard james keenan
It just looks like it had too much weight on it.
joe rogan
No, it's not that heavy.
It seems like it, but it's light.
A perfect union of contrary things available now, ladies and gentlemen.
I suggest you go out and purchase it.
Immediately.
maynard james keenan
We've got top ten New York Times bestseller.
joe rogan
Let's see if we can get this bitch up to number one, ladies and gentlemen.
Come on!
Come on!
Go buy it.
You know it's good.
He's wearing a wig.
Come on!
maynard james keenan
Merkin.
joe rogan
Come on!
Always a pleasure, my brother.
maynard james keenan
Sir.
joe rogan
Thank you.
maynard james keenan
Thank you.
joe rogan
Always awesome.
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