Sept. 2, 2010 - The Joe Rogan Experience
02:34:56
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| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
| Yes, sir. | ||
| Cheers. | ||
| And we're live. | ||
| And we're live. | ||
| There's so much to talk about. | ||
| So much to talk about. | ||
| It's been years. | ||
| It's been a while. | ||
| It's been a while. | ||
| And one of the reasons why you're here is because... | ||
| I was supposed to have Jackson. | ||
| I mean, we should just get right into this. | ||
| You think we should get into it or should we? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let the Budweiser settle in. | ||
|
unidentified
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Let the Budweiser settle in. | |
| I haven't even eaten breakfast. | ||
| I specifically didn't eat breakfast. | ||
| I'm like, I'm going to drink beer with Joe. | ||
| I already know he's getting me beer. | ||
| And that way it can hit me a lot faster and I'll loosen up my lips a lot sooner. | ||
| We can do whatever you want. | ||
| It's up to you. | ||
| You're looking thick, dude. | ||
| How much do you weigh now? | ||
| Man, so here's a crazy story. | ||
| I go to the PI because Dana tells me I can't go to 55. So I go to talk to the PI. He tells you you can't go. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Well, because he says I'm getting old and older. | ||
| Why did I just say he said old? | ||
| I'm getting old. | ||
| The weight cuts too hard. | ||
| So I said, all right, I'm going to go to the PI. You guys have this amazing facility with... | ||
| The PI stands for Performance Institute, if people don't know. | ||
| UFC Performance Institute. | ||
| And they have trainers and dietician nutrition, right? | ||
| So I'm going there to meet with them to get a guideline and some kind of plan that we can attack so I can go down. | ||
| Like, look, I met with your guys. | ||
| They said it's okay. | ||
| While I'm there, second day into all this like crazy testing you do, right? | ||
| They have all kinds of tests that they run where you get on these bikes and I mean... | ||
| Like, fuck, I was at an Olympic Training Center testing. | ||
| Um... | ||
| I wanted to say Joe Silva walked in, but then that's not right because he's not there anymore. | ||
|
unidentified
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Maynard? | |
| No. | ||
| Sean Shelby? | ||
| Shelby comes in and says, Cowboy, Mike Perry really wants to fight you. | ||
| You want to take this fight? | ||
| And I said, I thought I was going to 55. He said, yeah, he called you out and he really wants to fight you. | ||
| And I was like, well, fuck, okay. | ||
| I'll fight him. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Done. | ||
| That's fine. | ||
| But next one, can I go to 55? | ||
| You know, like, God damn. | ||
| So how this Perry thing all started was Felder's opponent got hurt. | ||
| I called to fight Gaethje because Vic got hurt. | ||
| So I was like, I'll go to 55, fight Gaethje. | ||
| Crazy shit just happened. | ||
| And then the Perry fight, they offered me and I called Perry. | ||
| I said, hey man, I know we're training together, but this is 10 days notice. | ||
| Let's do this. | ||
| He's like, fuck yeah, man. | ||
| It'd be great. | ||
| Let's do this. | ||
| So that's how that started. | ||
| And then I didn't get to fight. | ||
| That was the end of it. | ||
| For me, I went to USC to go back to 155. Then all of a sudden he's calling me out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Felder winds up fighting Perry. | ||
| You were going to fight Perry, or you were at least thinking about it. | ||
| Yeah, I was in the mix, but I didn't get cleared because I had stitches because I just fought, what, I don't know, 10 days before. | ||
| Plus, I was in the hospital having my new son, so it was kind of a weird time for everything, but it was wild. | ||
| Wild, wild shit, and now I'm fighting Perry November 10th in Denver. | ||
| Well... | ||
| What was going to happen was Jackson and Winkle John were supposed to be here today. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Well, you had... | ||
| I mean, you've been with them for how long? | ||
| Man, I want to say... | ||
| Before my WC days, so I went on... | ||
| More than 10 years. | ||
| Yeah, easily. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Easily more than 10 years. | ||
| I don't think there's another athlete there that's been there longer, besides Diego Sanchez, who's been there since the beginning, but... | ||
| Diego left for a little while. | ||
| Left for a little while, came back. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So me, you know, Holly, but she was with Wink before they merged. | ||
| So, but like with actually Jackson, Jackson, I'm like there. | ||
| I'm like the one. | ||
| I'm like it. | ||
| You know, everyone else kind of either left the gym or is retired. | ||
| So... | ||
| What the fuck happened? | ||
| Like, how did they decide that they were going to corner Mike Perry, who, by the way, I like a lot. | ||
| And I have nothing against to say Perry either. | ||
| This has nothing to do with Perry. | ||
| He's a fun dude. | ||
| I like that guy a lot. | ||
| I have no problem with him. | ||
| I mean, I took him on the boat, took him shooting with me, and when he was down there, part of the action, you know, Frank Lester, who's helping him with his pads, a friend of mine, you know, so he comes out shooting with me. | ||
| We go out on the boat and have fun, and So this has nothing to do with them. | ||
| I just asked when I went to go to 55 and Perry called me out and wants to fight. | ||
| Sure, no problem. | ||
| But I went to talk to Greg and Wink and say, hey, this guy's brand new to the gym. | ||
| He's only been here one camp, a couple of months. | ||
| I said, I don't think that it's okay for him to come in and call me out. | ||
| That's not right. | ||
| So if he is doing that, I don't think we should allow him to train here for this fight. | ||
| Fucking Winklejohn tells me, yeah, you know, I thought you called him out and he's just a shit ass and lies to your face. | ||
| So to me, he was like, yeah, sure, no problem. | ||
| I'll clear it up and we won't have any issues. | ||
| And then the next day he calls me on the phone and says, you know what? | ||
| I thought about it. | ||
| We don't have Perry, then I don't get paid, and I need to get paid for this fight, and because you just pay Greg, I don't make any money through the gym, so we're just going to go with him, and then basically tells me I'm no longer welcome in the gym. | ||
|
unidentified
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He is. | |
| He said, the team had a meeting. | ||
| Bullshit, the team didn't have a meeting. | ||
| I talked to everybody. | ||
| I mean, there was no meeting. | ||
| So to me, it's like the loyalty of Wink taking over this gym is just shit, man. | ||
| Turned into like a puppy mill. | ||
| It's all about money now and not the old Jackson. | ||
| When I used to work out, we're just getting into this, I guess, huh? | ||
| All right. | ||
| Start chugging. | ||
| Start chugging. | ||
| Shit. | ||
| Back when I first moved down here and I went to Greg's, When the Tap Out guys picked me up and introduced me and all that, right? | ||
| Back when you were on the Tap Out show. | ||
| Remember that? | ||
| That reality show. | ||
| Well, Mask called Greg and got me. | ||
| That's how I got involved with them, right? | ||
| I... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Motherfucker. | |
| I left. | ||
| Leonard Garcia was fighting Roger Wartner, one of my best friends. | ||
| Roger, what a fight that was, by the way. | ||
| Goddamn, right? | ||
| Motherfucking Mexican. | ||
| People forgot. | ||
| Damn! | ||
| People forgot about that fight. | ||
| Dude! | ||
| Go to Fight Pass. | ||
| Check that one out. | ||
| Yeah, right. | ||
| Bring that up. | ||
| Leonard's still the wildest dude I've ever met. | ||
| I love that guy. | ||
| So do I, man. | ||
| And so he calls me like, I need you to come down for a week. | ||
| Come for one week. | ||
| Help me get ready for Roger. | ||
| He took the fight on like three weeks note. | ||
| Something outlandish, just like me and Leonard do, right? | ||
| So... | ||
| I go down there. | ||
| I literally never left. | ||
| When I went down, first day I walked into Jackson's in Rashad, Keith, St. Pierre, Joe Daddy Stevenson. | ||
| I mean, the list goes on and on and on. | ||
| And I was like, wow, this is what a real gym is like? | ||
| This is what... | ||
| And they all accepted me. | ||
| I was like in the family, right? | ||
| I owned a house in Denver. | ||
| I called my grandma and said, I'm never coming home. | ||
| I'm staying here. | ||
|
unidentified
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Okay. | |
| Sell the house, right? | ||
| And I literally never went home. | ||
| She would just slowly come down and visit me and bring me truckloads of shit. | ||
| Right? | ||
|
unidentified
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Literally. | |
| I lived in a closet. | ||
| Man. | ||
| Fuck, a third as big as this room? | ||
| We had a bunk bed, me and Leonard. | ||
| And if one person was standing up, the other person had to be in the bed. | ||
| That's how small this room was. | ||
| And I lived there for two years above Jackson's and would train every day with him. | ||
| And like I said, I never left. | ||
| And Greg asked me, he sat me down after about, I don't know, a couple weeks of being there. | ||
| He said, man, I want you to be my 55er. | ||
| And at that time, the list of 55ers were nuts that he had. | ||
| And I was like, wow, fuck, Greg Jackson, who at the time... | ||
| The gym was 90% winning rate. | ||
| He's such a knowledgeable, awesome dude, man. | ||
| To see where the gym was to where the gym is now is... | ||
| It's heartbreaking to me, to be honest. | ||
| You want to talk about loyalty, which is the biggest thing in this conversation that we're having right now, is how they pick someone over me through being loyal. | ||
| I stuck by Greg, even when the gym started going down. | ||
| When Winklejohn merged over... | ||
| All the big pros left, it turned into like a puppy mill. | ||
| Back when Greg had it and it was its own school, you couldn't turn up to a pro class. | ||
| Some guy couldn't just come here and knock on your door. | ||
| Like you say, you get weirdos here all the time. | ||
| Next thing you know, he has shin pads on and he's sparring. | ||
| There's literally at the new gym, bums come in off the street. | ||
| I swear to God, and we'll come in and put stuff on a fight. | ||
| That's a true story. | ||
| Random bums off the street. | ||
| And that would never happen back in the day. | ||
| So, Greg doesn't run it anymore? | ||
| No. | ||
| He's like so out of the loop. | ||
| Winklejohn runs the entire thing. | ||
| What is Greg doing? | ||
| He kind of stepped back for a couple years, man. | ||
| Like, kind of started doing other things and just kind of got burned out, I guess. | ||
| Which is why I created the BMF Ranch. | ||
| I needed somewhere to go and something to do. | ||
| So, I created my place. | ||
| Which is Wink's argument with me right now saying, you be at your own place. | ||
| You don't ever come here, blah, blah, blah. | ||
| The people you let in here is outlandish. | ||
| You pay $150, you can get on the mats and spar with Holly Holmes. | ||
| That's what it's come to down there. | ||
| Back in the day, it was private and just us and good pros. | ||
| Everyone there for the same mission, trying to get better. | ||
| I've talked to some other people that I don't want to name, but they've said that when they go down there, new guys will come in and it's literally a fight. | ||
| It's a fight. | ||
| There's no A, B, C class anymore. | ||
| It's literally, these guys come in, they want to make a name on you. | ||
| But sometimes when you're towards the end of a fight camp, you don't need those new guys. | ||
| You don't need that crazy sparring. | ||
| Right. | ||
| You need the guys you trust. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Not some random guy I don't know. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's just asinine to me, man, what they turn that place into. | ||
| It's crazy that that still happens in MMA because you're never going to find that in boxing. | ||
| In boxing, all sparring is controlled. | ||
| You bring in the sparring partners. | ||
| You know who you're working with. | ||
| So, I mean, we talk loyalty again. | ||
| To me, with Greg, his name is on that building. | ||
| It's Wink, Jackson Wink, right? | ||
| Jackson fucking Wink. | ||
| Your name's first even. | ||
| When it came time to pick the decision and they said, we want to go with Perry. | ||
| Why the fuck didn't you stand? | ||
| Because Greg's still with me. | ||
| He's like, yeah, I'll just come to the ranch and we'll sort this out. | ||
| And I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? | ||
| You tell me I can't come into the Jackson Wink gym, but you're going to backdoor and come to my fucking house. | ||
| And we're going to train to fight me while Perry's there at the gym. | ||
| You see everything he does. | ||
| And then you're going to come and you're going to train me. | ||
| Not to mention, you're holding classes there and he's watching. | ||
| I mean, you might not be training him to beat me, but there's a lot of people there that have trained me for fucking years. | ||
| So, to me, that was the point I was saying. | ||
| Like, man, can we just not have him there for this camp? | ||
| I mean, there's a lot of secrets that I... That, like, inner secrets that I have. | ||
| Like... | ||
| I'm fucking scared to death to fight. | ||
| That's the thing that they can tell him. | ||
| Or they tell him, you know, go get cowboy mad. | ||
| He doesn't fight well when he's pissed off. | ||
| So fucking piss him off. | ||
| Poke at him. | ||
| Poke the bear. | ||
| Piss him off. | ||
| Get him out of his helmet. | ||
| Shit like this. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And there's a lot of other things, small, dumb things that I do. | ||
| Tendencies that they've seen over a decade. | ||
| Yeah, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| To me, that's... | ||
| It's very intimate. | ||
| The relationship between a coach and a fighter is very intense. | ||
| So for someone to violate that in that way... | ||
| And, you know, I don't think there's anything wrong with guys from a camp deciding to fight each other. | ||
| And you've got to work that out. | ||
| But for them to tell you that you can't train... | ||
| I agree with you. | ||
| We'll figure it out. | ||
| All right, Carlos, you go that way. | ||
| These are your times, your hours. | ||
| Respect each other, friends, training partners. | ||
| The new guy who just came in, like I said, nothing against Perry. | ||
| He wants a home. | ||
| He felt like Jackson's his favorite. | ||
| He's great. | ||
| I like that guy a lot. | ||
| It's not him. | ||
| I mean, what is he going to do? | ||
| Right. | ||
| And I just said, hey, Frank was going to go and train with him wherever he I heard stories he was looking to go to Vegas anyway. | ||
| I don't have any idea, man. | ||
| I was just like, man, can we just not do it for this fight? | ||
| And then Winkle John called me on the phone. | ||
| Didn't he have the fucking balls or the backbone to say it to my fucking face? | ||
| And I was right there with him. | ||
| Called me on the phone like, oh, yeah, we're actually gonna... | ||
| Oh, go with Perry. | ||
| You know, he pays money. | ||
| Again, it comes back to the money. | ||
| I'm like... | ||
| So Perry pays him a percentage and you don't? | ||
| I only pay Greg. | ||
| For my entire career I've ever been there because I don't like Winklejohn's style. | ||
| I don't like his way he holds mitts. | ||
| I don't like the way he trains people. | ||
| What's different about what he does? | ||
| It's the same thing for you, for me, for John, Sam. | ||
| It's the cookie cutter. | ||
| Everything's got to the same. | ||
| And it never changes. | ||
| It's... | ||
| I don't understand how you could be a coach of one of the greatest, at one time, the greatest gyms on the planet, you know? | ||
| And then don't ever evolve, don't ever change, and don't run class. | ||
| And to me, it's... | ||
| He just drove that place into the ground, man. | ||
| Literally turned it into a puppy mill. | ||
| It's only about making money. | ||
| And for you guys, I'm talking about a puppy mill. | ||
| When someone has a dog and they just fucking breed it and sell puppies and breed it and sell puppies, that's what's happening. | ||
| That's the infrastructure of this gym. | ||
| Now, let's talk about training there. | ||
| Let's talk about coaching, right? | ||
| Greg's supposed to be the general, right? | ||
| I'm just a soldier. | ||
| How come I have to be now a general and a soldier? | ||
| That's what's fucking up in my career. | ||
| I need someone to tell me what to do, tell me what not to do. | ||
| And I had to start my own school at the ranch, bring in my own coaches, but now I'm making all the executive decisions. | ||
| When we're training, what we're training, what we're doing. | ||
| And I'm no longer just a soldier. | ||
| I'm having to fucking run this whole thing. | ||
| That's a problem for fighters. | ||
| It's a problem for me, too. | ||
| I'm a fucking super alpha male. | ||
| And I like to communicate with my coaches and get everything done. | ||
| And the guys I have are fucking standing by me. | ||
| And I love them to death. | ||
| But I need someone to be like, you know what? | ||
| You crazy fucking bastard. | ||
| You're going too hard. | ||
| You're going too hard. | ||
| You need to taper off. | ||
| Let's taper off. | ||
| Let's pump the brake. | ||
| Or let's pick it up. | ||
| The fucking fun, fuck-off part of your life is taking over into your training. | ||
| Can we step it up a little bit? | ||
| I need that. | ||
| I need fucking direction. | ||
| I need today we're working on this. | ||
| Not just me going in there saying... | ||
| Let's fucking wrestle today. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| You know what to do, but it's also nice for someone else who knows what to do who's completely objective to stand on the outside. | ||
| Because I'm in this so long. | ||
| I could literally, Joe, never spar from now until the Perry fight and probably not even do one jiu-jitsu role and I would be okay to fight mentally. | ||
| But that's probably not a very smart idea, right? | ||
| It's not you at your optimum. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| Um, so it's just, it's fucking asinine to me and the coaches down there. | ||
| So not only can somebody just ring the doorbell and show up and train, pay the money, you can pay the $25 to drop in or you pay the $150 the month, come to any class you want. | ||
| But if you're a coach, you can just coach the class. | ||
| It's that asinine to you. | ||
| I see a new striking coach or a new wrestling coach or a new jujitsu guy in there twice a week probably. | ||
| And they're coaching the class. | ||
| Our main wrestling coach of Jackson Wing, the greatest school in the fucking world, is a reception to a chiropractic upstairs. | ||
| He's greatest credentials, whereas he was a junior assistant coach at a college, don't know the college name, who got fired for selling the kids steroids. | ||
| That's our wrestling coach at one of the greatest schools in the world. | ||
| Is he a good coach? | ||
| No, he's terrible. | ||
| He's fucking god-awful terrible. | ||
| He watches videos on YouTube and tries to teach people things that don't even fucking work. | ||
| It's asinine. | ||
| Which is another reason why I had to hire my own coach and bring him in. | ||
| You know, it's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, what? | ||
| And now, they don't even drill, they just go live and they want to know why people get hurt every day. | ||
| It's like, you can't just go in and say, okay, and we're wrestling, go! | ||
| So do you think that people just get burnt out on doing things the right way and they just figure, look, I'm just going to do this the way that makes the most money? | ||
| Well, I think... | ||
| And I wish I had the answer for that. | ||
| I do because I'm not in that position to... | ||
| I'm not running a gym and I've never done that because I don't want... | ||
| Me showing up to class every single day would wear me the fuck out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It wears everybody out. | ||
| It's got to. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But you should have an infrastructure set in place that takes... | ||
| Especially if... | ||
| You're the greatest at one time, right? | ||
| If your winning percentages are in the 80s and 90s and now they're in the 20s, I have no clue what our rating record of the gym is, but it's nothing like it used to be, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it's fucking... | ||
| It's asinine to me, man. | ||
| So the way you were doing is that you have the BMF ranch. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| You have everything set up. | ||
| You bring in all your sparring partners, and you would be doing all your training out there. | ||
| And how would Greg interact with that? | ||
| We'd either show up down at Jackson's and spar, because there's still bodies down there, right? | ||
| There's still guys. | ||
| We'd show up down at spar. | ||
| We'd bring all the guys down. | ||
| Or Greg would come up three or four times a week to the ranch. | ||
| And how far is your ranch from? | ||
| 50 miles, about. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| A good hour, solid hour drive into the vast Nolans of New Mexico. | ||
| New Mexico, yeah. | ||
| Do you like living out there? | ||
| I do. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| I fucking love it. | ||
| So, I sold my house. | ||
| I moved here. | ||
| I fucking planted roots. | ||
| Now, I could never, ever sell my place. | ||
| I'm stuck in New Mexico. | ||
| I'm moving back to Colorado. | ||
| Why could you never sell it? | ||
| Because I have to sell to like a crazy cult leader. | ||
| So, if anybody out there listening wants to operate a cult, I have the... | ||
| Are you talking to one right now? | ||
| I have the... | ||
| I have a perfect house. | ||
| Talk to me about what kind of acreage you talk about. | ||
|
unidentified
|
We've got 40 acres, plenty of rooms, buildings. | |
| What kind of animals are in your vicinity? | ||
| This might be where we start. | ||
| There's about an hour drive. | ||
| You can run into some elk. | ||
| We've got antelope. | ||
| Everywhere, which is the crazy thing about antelope. | ||
| You know they don't jump fences. | ||
| Yeah, they won't jump fences. | ||
| It's crazy, right? | ||
| You could just literally corner them into a... | ||
| They occasionally jump a fence. | ||
| They've been known to jump a fence occasionally. | ||
| It was very, very rare. | ||
| You know they evolved before the Ice Age? | ||
| They evolved to get away from cheetahs. | ||
| How are you so smart? | ||
| That's what I want to know. | ||
| I'm not smart. | ||
| I just remember things. | ||
| Dude, it's fucking insane. | ||
| There was a mass extinction of giant land mammals. | ||
| It's somewhere around 12,000 years ago in North America. | ||
| And before then, there was cheetahs. | ||
| There was actual North American cheetahs. | ||
| Right. | ||
| There was a North American lion that's bigger than the African lion. | ||
| How about that shit? | ||
| Giant ass fucking lion. | ||
| And that's where these fucking things evolve. | ||
| Did you want another chew? | ||
| Yeah, I'm going to try that shit. | ||
| I swallowed it last time. | ||
| That's the only... | ||
| That's mainly... | ||
| Whenever I meet people for autographs, they're like, dude, I can't believe you got Rogan to fucking take a chew. | ||
| Not just take it. | ||
| I swallowed it. | ||
| I didn't know what I was doing. | ||
| Like a man! | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Alright, round two. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Round two. | |
| What kind is this? | ||
| So good. | ||
| It's Wintergreen Copenhagen. | ||
| Under your chin, right? | ||
| Under your lip. | ||
| It's under your chin. | ||
| You can put it under your chin if you want. | ||
| Yeah, take just a little one. | ||
| Too late. | ||
| Too late. | ||
| Take a giant one. | ||
| Take a big old upper liver. | ||
| So, there's that. | ||
| There's turkeys out there. | ||
| I love turkey. | ||
| I'm a bird hunting fanatic, man. | ||
| I love birds. | ||
| How many acres you got out there? | ||
| 40 acres. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, wow. | |
| That's nice. | ||
| Do you have a mule, too? | ||
| 40 acres and a mule, remember? | ||
| But birds, I'm like a bird junkie. | ||
| How'd you find that spot? | ||
| So when I moved out there, and after I was in the gym for like a year and a half with Leonard, I was like, bro. | ||
| You're like winning a bunch of UFC fights now. | ||
| I'm in the WC. We're starting to get a little bit of money. | ||
| Let's get a house together, right? | ||
| Let's find a house. | ||
| So I started looking kind of in the remote areas around where I knew I could commute in, but I wanted somewhere I could ride my dirt bike, shoot guns, just be cowboy. | ||
| And we found that place. | ||
| And I called my grandpa. | ||
| And I said, hey, I think I found a house. | ||
| And he said, I'll be right there. | ||
| And him and my grandma drove. | ||
| And he walked up to the lady and he handed her an envelope full of cash and said, we'll take it. | ||
| Just like that. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Yeah, it was probably $60,000 or $70,000 less than they were asking, but he had real cash. | ||
| Real cash. | ||
| I said, we'll take it. | ||
| My grandson wants it and we'll take it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| And I was like, oh, I was just showing like Okay. | ||
| Thanks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Grab them up. | |
| Right? | ||
| He just bought me a house? | ||
| And he believed in me. | ||
| No matter what I did, I used to be a magician. | ||
| I used to love magic, right? | ||
| So he'd always buy me magic shit and sit there and watch me do it. | ||
| He was such a fucking cool dude, man. | ||
| He used to do magic? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| Did you ever do shows? | ||
| No, no. | ||
| I mean, I was like 12, 13. I would do shows to my grandma and grandpa and my friends. | ||
| And I still have like a toolbox full of magic stuff. | ||
| I should bust it out and bring it out here one time. | ||
| There's some cool, cool things. | ||
| Are you good at it? | ||
| Not like good. | ||
| Like you wouldn't be like, whoa! | ||
| But there's some, some of the sleight of hand stuff is pretty fun. | ||
| And like the coin magic is good. | ||
| How do you keep this shit from going in your mouth? | ||
| Because for me, it doesn't seem to want to stay put. | ||
| Well, you keep drinking on top of it. | ||
| You got to bury it with your tongue and then drink over it. | ||
| I fucking love it. | ||
| So, yeah. | ||
| Greatest dude, man. | ||
| Taught me a lot. | ||
| Taught me a lot about loyalty and respect, man. | ||
| And I called my grandma on my way here today. | ||
| And I said, I'm going to fucking set fire to this bridge to Jackson's. | ||
| And she wrote me back and said, well, you need to like... | ||
| Are you attacking them logically or are you out of anger? | ||
| Which direction are we going here? | ||
| Powerful grandma. | ||
| Right? | ||
| On the ball. | ||
| Which direction are we going? | ||
| And she said... | ||
| You're going to start spitting soon, huh? | ||
| Yeah, you definitely got to spit. | ||
| She said, make sure... | ||
| You know, always in life, don't ever paint yourself into a corner. | ||
| Like, these are major lessons. | ||
| Don't burn bridges you can't cross. | ||
| But she told me today, fucking let it go. | ||
| Let them have it. | ||
| They want to step across the line. | ||
| They do the lie in the sand. | ||
| Let them want to burn their own. | ||
| Make them feel so bad they want to burn their own fucking gym to the ground, you know? | ||
| It's like... | ||
| To me, having the moment for Greg to say, you know what, Wink? | ||
| My name's on this fucking gym. | ||
| Cowboy's been with me from the start. | ||
| There's been times, two or three camps ago, where I've trained Greg maybe one or two times, and I still write him a check. | ||
| I still write him a check, and I pay him because he got me into this motherfucker, and loyalty to me is the top of the line thing, right? | ||
| It's top of the line to me, too. | ||
| That's why you're here. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And that's why they're not. | ||
| And, you know, and it's unfortunate because I like Greg a lot. | ||
| I love Greg. | ||
| I don't know much about Winklejohn other than his work. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| What he's done with Holly and a lot of other people. | ||
| And I was real torn up about this. | ||
| That's why I contacted you. | ||
| Sure, sure. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know, when you told me that they were- This is like a crazy scenario all around for everybody across the board. | |
| Like, wait, what do you- Like, what? | ||
| What the fuck do you mean? | ||
| What's happening here? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know, and- It's crazy. | ||
| It's wild. | ||
| I appreciate you sticking by my side. | ||
| Well, it was a situation where I didn't know what to do. | ||
| I was like, I can't just ignore it. | ||
| I would have to bring it up when they were here, and then I wouldn't get a full representation of it. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| I mean, do you feel like you're getting a full representation? | ||
| I love it. | ||
| I think I've got to figure out how to do this right. | ||
| It's a skill you learn how to tuck it in your... | ||
| It's all over the place. | ||
| It's in my mouth. | ||
| Mine is in a little ball right here. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Mine is not. | ||
| Mine is not controlled. | ||
| I'm going to wind up swallowing this again. | ||
| So if your name's on the thing, like... | ||
| Right? | ||
| There you go. | ||
| Spit it out. | ||
| I just don't have any control. | ||
| Now you've got to open another beer and wrench it. | ||
| You've got to give it a wrench. | ||
| A wrench? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, rinse. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| I thought you said wrench it. | ||
| Yeah, open a beer, rinse it out, spit it out, that way you don't get any more swallowed. | ||
| That way you're not sick again. | ||
| I wasn't sick last time. | ||
| I was fine. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Good. | |
| It was weird. | ||
| I swallowed the whole thing. | ||
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| I missed you, man. | ||
| I missed you. | ||
| It's been a while. | ||
| So much has happened. | ||
| I'm glad we got that kind of out of the way. | ||
| I'm sure I'll circle back when I drink a little bit more. | ||
| Yeah, I'm sure too. | ||
| It's unfortunate. | ||
| And I know what it must be like to try to keep the lights on in a big gym. | ||
| And now they have dorms. | ||
| It's huge. | ||
| Giant-ass place. | ||
| Huge overhead, I'm sure. | ||
| All these people coming in, coming out. | ||
| And then you know how fighters are. | ||
| Not you, but some fighters. | ||
| They don't give a fuck about loyalty. | ||
| They just care about themselves. | ||
| They're on their path. | ||
| It's a very solid... | ||
| And selfish. | ||
| A very selfish sport. | ||
| You kind of have to be, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I think that's kind of where the team got... | ||
| Cowboys are really selfish. | ||
| He has his own gym now. | ||
| Well, I had to. | ||
| I fucking had to, man, for the better of my family and me. | ||
| I had to keep evolving. | ||
| I couldn't spiral down this drain with you guys. | ||
| Now Michelle Watterson just built a new gym. | ||
| She's doing the same thing in her backyard. | ||
| Love her to death. | ||
| She's doing that too? | ||
| Doing it too. | ||
| Her and her husband built a badass little gym. | ||
| All sponsored by Onnit. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, it's bitching, man. | ||
| It's cool. | ||
| Yeah, good for her. | ||
| Yeah, Michelle, whoop, whoop. | ||
| You know? | ||
| But if you look at the track record since Wink has taken over, the gym, everyone's left. | ||
| I mean, it's like you don't see a pattern here, Wink. | ||
| Like, maybe you should change something up or... | ||
| Just not allowing him. | ||
| Well, he's been fighting for a long time. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| And then training for a long time. | ||
| I mean, he was a badass kickboxer before he ever got into training. | ||
| And, you know, I think one of the things that happens with people, they just get this whole selfishness of the sport. | ||
| It wears people down to a certain extent. | ||
| There's camaraderie, but there's also selfishness. | ||
| And they're all constantly going against each other. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| And, you know, having a gym like that, the expenses, the overhead, and then, you know, dealing with people that are just grabbing, grabbing, grabbing, it's just, it's got to get overwhelming. | ||
| And you see a guy like Mike Perry, who, you know, is a potential big star. | ||
| He's a colorful kid. | ||
| He's a knockout artist. | ||
| He fucking loves to fight. | ||
| If I was a coach, I'd be like, this is the kind of guy I want in my gym. | ||
| He's a fucking animal. | ||
| It's a great asset. | ||
| I'm super excited to fight him because this is one of those fights where we're going to go in the middle of the ring and we're going to fucking fight. | ||
| The old school fucking let's fight. | ||
| I'm pumped on it. | ||
| I love the kid. | ||
| He's cool. | ||
| He's crazy. | ||
| Him and I would get along just crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| We do. | ||
| So, I got nothing, like I said, nothing about him or Frank. | ||
| Frank is coach who... | ||
| Well, that's... | ||
| Perry's working with Frank, another striking coach, who... | ||
| Frank Lester. | ||
| Lester, who is holding the infrastructure of the gym together almost single-handedly. | ||
| You know, there's a couple of wrestling guys. | ||
| Is Brandon Gibson still there? | ||
| Yeah, Brandon still there. | ||
| Brandon has a full-time job, just got promoted again in his government job. | ||
| He has like a real government job. | ||
| Is that a job job? | ||
| On top of being a big-time trainer? | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| How the fuck does he do that? | ||
| Man, I have no idea. | ||
| He has like a 9-6 job. | ||
| Maybe 7-6 job. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| He's every morning up early, take care of his family. | ||
| He's a great dude. | ||
| I got nothing bad. | ||
| Nothing but love for Brandon Gibson, man. | ||
| Him and I just separate only because I just want a different angle of striking. | ||
| It had nothing to do with, he's a bad coach, I lost my fight, I'm firing you. | ||
| It's Just fucking, just trying something new. | ||
| Just trying something new, that's all. | ||
| But yes, Gibson kind of just works, you know, with John Dotson, with Condit. | ||
| I mean, he doesn't have the time to go in there and just hold that gym together. | ||
| So he actually has a real job and he just got another promotion. | ||
| So he's like the top of the, he started off as a lifeguard, worked his way all the way up to the city. | ||
| Now he's damn near governor. | ||
| I think that's next. | ||
| Governor is next. | ||
| It's not hard. | ||
| I had Gary Johnson in here. | ||
| I think I could be governor of New Mexico. | ||
| No offense, Gary. | ||
| Well, let's legalize pot and mushrooms. | ||
| Is it not legal there? | ||
| It's recreational. | ||
| I mean, it's medical. | ||
| You gotta have AIDS. Yeah. | ||
| Is it one of those places? | ||
| It's one of those places. | ||
| You gotta have AIDS. This is a lot of places where you gotta have AIDS. It used to be a lot of places, but Vegas used to be like that. | ||
| Now Vegas is Lucy Goose. | ||
| Open wide. | ||
| Vegas has got full-on dispensaries. | ||
| Man. | ||
| Fucking Vegas, man. | ||
| Vegas is definitely a two-night town, man. | ||
| Yeah, it's rough on the liver. | ||
| It's rough on everything. | ||
| It just takes you the fuck in, man. | ||
| I was just there last night. | ||
| I was out there for a big monster conference, and it's just like, you sit in your room, you're like, well, I could just go down and... | ||
| Gamble, I guess. | ||
| And then you start gambling. | ||
| Have you ever played Baccarat? | ||
| I don't play shit. | ||
| I have never either. | ||
| And I decided... | ||
| We tried Baccarat. | ||
| Like, 007. I was like, we'll be like 007. We'll go in there. | ||
| I played with one of the higher-ups in Monster. | ||
| And he took us down and we played this game. | ||
| And... | ||
| Fuck, we want a shitload of money. | ||
| A shitload of money. | ||
| That's the trick. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I'll take some of that. | ||
| I don't really smoke much pot, but I'll do it just because I'm with you. | ||
| Take care of that. | ||
| They grew that on the moon. | ||
| I saw a video of him breakdancing the other night. | ||
| He breakdanced? | ||
| I do. | ||
| I used to. | ||
| I used to really breakdance. | ||
| So I'm at the Monster Conference. | ||
| I'm at the Monster Conference and Monster now has a breakdancing team. | ||
| What? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Monster got me some badass bags, man. | ||
| Yeah, Hans is a good dude, man. | ||
| He's a great dude. | ||
| Yeah, he takes care of a lot of people. | ||
| Again, the infrastructure of Monster... | ||
| Great, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Great infrastructure monster. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So, the Ambassador Hans takes care of it, takes care of his people. | ||
| Loyalty, family, super family. | ||
| Exactly, right? | ||
| Great guy. | ||
| So, I've seen the monster. | ||
| I was going to tell you, I've seen the monster bags laying back. | ||
| They're fucking... | ||
| I just got them. | ||
| Gostin Bolanos. | ||
| It was his idea. | ||
| So... | ||
| A little bit more of that. | ||
| You're going to get crazy. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| We'll start talking about space soon. | ||
| Doing drugs with Joe. | ||
| It's not drugs. | ||
| It's nature. | ||
| We're doing nature, bro. | ||
| Alright, I'm with you. | ||
| So the breakdancers, they start breakdancing. | ||
| And then halfway through their show, they stop it. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| So they set up a battle between me and this other guy, right? | ||
| We just have to go out here and we have to breakdance. | ||
| I used to breakdance back years ago, but on a slippery floor with cowboy boots, and I didn't have properly stretched. | ||
| Yeah, that's not good. | ||
| Oh, it was so fun, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at you! | |
| Cowboy boots! | ||
| Yeah, cowboy boots, monster shirt, getting down, doing a little breakdancing. | ||
| It was so fun, man. | ||
| Look at you! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at you! | |
| Dude, we have a bunch of guys from 10th Planet that started out as breakdancing. | ||
| Gio Martinez, Richard Martinez. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, man. | |
| You can do a one-handed push-up with a one-handed handstand with your feet up in the air and you twist them around. | ||
| That's crazy control of your body. | ||
| It's like yoga on steroids. | ||
| It's so hard. | ||
| It's so hard. | ||
| It's even harder to do. | ||
| After 12 years of never even doing it again. | ||
| I'm sure. | ||
| And go! | ||
| With cowboy boots on. | ||
| Here we go. | ||
| We had a bunch of these guys come in, and Eddie called me up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He goes, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude. | |
| You know, Eddie gets crazy. | ||
| He goes, listen, man, breakdancing. | ||
| Breakdancing. | ||
| Breakdancing is the thing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's the thing. | |
| These guys are so fucking strong, I can't even control them. | ||
| Breakdancers, man. | ||
| These guys are like 140 pounds, and it's like holding on to a live wire. | ||
| Yeah, they're so strong. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What is that guy's name? | ||
| B-Boy Pocket Kim? | ||
| Is that what his name is? | ||
| What is his name? | ||
| I put him on my Instagram way back in the day. | ||
| This is Korean kid that is... | ||
| It doesn't even seem like a human can do what he does. | ||
| That's how I felt yesterday when those guys were dancing. | ||
| I was like, how are you doing? | ||
| He spins all on one hand. | ||
| He's on one hand, hopping up and down in the air and spinning around. | ||
| And you're like... | ||
| Do you find it? | ||
| Pocket Kim. | ||
| Yeah, watch this motherfucker. | ||
| This guy is such a beast. | ||
| It's crazy to watch. | ||
| There's a bunch of these guys now. | ||
| There's the stance elements. | ||
| With the red shoes? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Look at this motherfucker. | ||
| Look at this motherfucker. | ||
| I mean, what the fuck is he doing? | ||
| It's called Air Tracks. | ||
| That is crazy. | ||
| It's called Air Tracks, but he's laying right there. | ||
| But that is crazy. | ||
| Yeah, it's like flaring in the air. | ||
| That is... | ||
| Damn near impossible to do. | ||
| That guy is a freak. | ||
| He's the freak of all freaks. | ||
| It's crazy what he can do. | ||
| And there's a few of those guys. | ||
| If you go to that Stance Elements, click on that Stance Elements, Jamie. | ||
| These guys are – I didn't know about this until Tim Ferriss put it on his Instagram. | ||
| He put Pocket Kim on and then I went and watched these guys. | ||
| These guys are doing just insane physical acrobatics along with music. | ||
| But I feel like the kids now are doing insane everything. | ||
| Snowboarding, dirt biking. | ||
| Jiu-jitsu, everything. | ||
| Everything is on a whole other playing field, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And MMA fighters, these young guys that are coming in. | ||
| Are not just solely one discipline, right? | ||
| They have everything. | ||
| They're MMA fighters. | ||
| You've seen these new guys, like Zabit is one of my favorite guys to watch. | ||
| Zabit Magomed Sharapov. | ||
| Say that five times a month. | ||
| It's like these new high-level guys are coming in, and you're looking at them like, oh, okay, we just hit the new evolution. | ||
| There's a new evolution going on with these young guys coming up. | ||
| It's fascinating. | ||
| I mean, but that's to be expected, right? | ||
| With everything, I guess. | ||
| Especially with social media, you get to see these guys, like on Instagram, you get to see the moves that that guy's doing and all these other break dancers get to see it. | ||
| They would have to see it live. | ||
| Now they're seeing it in Korea, they're seeing it in Japan, they don't even have to travel. | ||
| And they're seeing these moves. | ||
| And you slow down, re-watch it, and learn, and learn, and learn, right? | ||
| It's a crazy time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Crazy time. | |
| And not only do we get to watch, but we also get the shit-ass guy in his basement that gets to talk shit about that. | ||
| Yeah, there's a little bit of that. | ||
| There's a lot of it. | ||
| You can't pay attention to that cowboy. | ||
| It burns my soul. | ||
| Yeah, but you're too good to pay attention to that. | ||
| I hate... | ||
| I wish I was too good to say that, but I get... | ||
| It's just like if I was coming here and someone out in the parking lot said something to me, I'd say, what the fuck... | ||
| Who the fuck are you talking to like that? | ||
| It'd be a moment there. | ||
| That's how I still feel today. | ||
| Well, that's why you're a cowboy. | ||
| That's why you're who you are. | ||
| You know what will help you a little bit of this? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Well, the new mood. | ||
| New mood. | ||
| The super new mood. | ||
| Get you some of the real new mood. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| That's a gift from me to you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Thank you, sir. | |
| I'm glad you enjoyed that. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| Your buddy, Paul. | ||
| Paul Stamets. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Paul Stamets. | |
| Paul Stamets in light. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck. | |
| Okay. | ||
| Let's back this up. | ||
| Let's back it all up. | ||
| Let's take this train back. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Beep. | |
| Yeah, just a little bit. | ||
| Okay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Beep. | |
| So, you speaking about DMT... Okay, let's back it up one more. | ||
| One more. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Beep! | |
| I've never done any drugs in my entire life ever. | ||
| You did a lot of drugs in here already. | ||
| You did nicotine, you did alcohol. | ||
| Remember, we're backed up. | ||
| I've never done any drug ever. | ||
| Never, ever. | ||
| What year was this? | ||
| Two years ago. | ||
| Oh, you did booze. | ||
| That's legal. | ||
| Oh, legal. | ||
|
unidentified
|
The law. | |
| Oh, it's almost a law. | ||
| You're a product of drugs. | ||
| I am a product of drugs, Jerry. | ||
| It's not a bad drug. | ||
| Budweiser's a fantastic drug. | ||
| It's made for great jokes, fun times, right? | ||
| How many fucking good times have people had because of Budweiser? | ||
| God bless you, Budweiser. | ||
| Salute. | ||
| It's a good drug. | ||
| It's well-regulated. | ||
| You know what one bottle does? | ||
| That's what I like. | ||
| Makes you want two. | ||
| You know what one bottle does makes you want two. | ||
| Right, but that's on you, man. | ||
| One bottle. | ||
| You gotta have some goddamn self-control. | ||
| One bottle, you know what a bottle of Budweiser does. | ||
| It's really clear. | ||
| True. | ||
| It's like, you eat a fucking pot brownie, it could be anything, you know? | ||
| Who knows the fuck you're getting? | ||
| I got that limit in Utah, everything is 3.2%. | ||
| Poor people in Utah. | ||
| You know they're rebranding? | ||
| Did you know the Mormons are rebranding? | ||
| I found out this last night. | ||
| They don't call Mormons anymore. | ||
| Eric Griffin was telling me, calling a Mormon a Mormon is like calling a small person a midget. | ||
| Yep. | ||
| What do you call them? | ||
| Latter Day Saints. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, wow. | |
| Shout out to the Latter Day Saints. | ||
| Magic underwear. | ||
| Magic underwear! | ||
| God damn it. | ||
| So, no drugs. | ||
| Okay? | ||
| No drugs. | ||
| You hear you talking about DMT. Everyone's on this DMT ride. | ||
| Just sponsored by this little company called Onnit, which is now a fucking huge company, which I love. | ||
|
unidentified
|
By the way, the Gut Health... | |
| Probiotics, man. | ||
| That's my favorite. | ||
| Do you eat kimchi or anything like that? | ||
| No. | ||
| You should. | ||
| Get involved with some probiotics. | ||
| Kefir's really good. | ||
| Kimchi's really good. | ||
| Now your people are like, you're talking about your diet again. | ||
| Oh man, it's good, dude. | ||
| It's good. | ||
| People need to know. | ||
| You gotta take care of your internal. | ||
| You don't see that gut health, man, but it affects your depression, your mood, the way your brain works, where your immune system functions. | ||
| Gut health's everything. | ||
| Those little on-it packets are key, man. | ||
| I don't travel without those bitches. | ||
| I don't go a day without them. | ||
| They got a new package for them now. | ||
| They're not in the same old box, more high-tech, cool, sleek-looking box now. | ||
| Well, they exist on the substrate that's in those capsules. | ||
| That's one of the ways you don't have to refrigerate it. | ||
| It's so good for travel. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I think you should have a variety of probiotics, but I think it's one of the most critical things that people don't think about. | ||
| Anyway. | ||
| So, drugs. | ||
| Drugs. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Drugs. | |
| Aubrey said, hey, why don't you come out? | ||
| We got a little group of people doing some DMT. Did he do the whole ceremony? | ||
| Music, chants, everything. | ||
| The Eka Rose? | ||
| The whole thing. | ||
| We smoked tobacco out by the fire. | ||
| Talked about what we were going to do. | ||
| I'm going to play some of that Eka Rose. | ||
| Talk about what direction we wanted this to go. | ||
| What we wanted the journey to consist of. | ||
| I call my best friends up, take them with me. | ||
| And we go out there and we fucking... | ||
| We do this. | ||
| We sit in this room. | ||
| We go through the chants and the ceremony. | ||
| And I'm scared to death because I've never done anything. | ||
| You should be scared. | ||
| Scared. | ||
| Never done anything. | ||
| I wish... | ||
| That's it. | ||
| Waking up the spirits. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You just have that. | |
| That's your... | ||
| It's on your... | ||
| Oh, dude. | ||
| This can make me trip. | ||
| If I listen to this, if I eat a pot brownie, listen to this, and get in the tank, I'll start tripping. | ||
|
unidentified
|
All right. | |
| Because when you do DMT and you hear this, they dance for you. | ||
| Right. | ||
| The whole experience. | ||
| You realize what this is. | ||
| This is like a technology to maximize DMT. And while you're on this DMT, this is playing in the background. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| On a drum and chants. | ||
| Yeah, that's what's going on. | ||
| I wasn't in a super spooky night camera room like this, but it was... | ||
| Aubrey has a nice... | ||
| He knows what the fuck he's doing. | ||
| He knows what the fuck he's doing. | ||
| Yeah, he's doing it the real way. | ||
| You feel really spiritual in the room. | ||
| He might be a beautiful man with a beautiful body and looks like he's running a sex cult, but what he really is doing is doing it the right way. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You say it looks like legitimately doing it the right way. | |
| I could maybe sell the ranch to Aubrey and the sex cult. | ||
| Well, listen, Aubrey and I are partners. | ||
| We'll talk after this podcast is over. | ||
| I just need to know what kind of zoning you have and whether or not you have water on the property. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There we go. | |
| I do have water. | ||
| You got a well? | ||
| I have a well. | ||
| Two wells, actually. | ||
| So what happened? | ||
| Alright, so this music's playing, and they load the pipe, which to me looked like pink cocaine, right? | ||
| Like dust, pink dust. | ||
| And they load it in this pipe, and he says just light it, and you want to breathe fresh air out of the corner of your mouth, like, as you're taking this harsh smoke in. | ||
| It smells like burning plastic. | ||
| It's harsh. | ||
| And he says just hit it until you can't anymore. | ||
| I'm like, what the fuck does that mean? | ||
| I feel like I can hit this forever. | ||
| So I hit it, and I hit it, and then all of a sudden I say, oh, you hit it until you can't anymore, and he starts getting wavy, and then I just, the pipe falls out of my mouth, and I fall back. | ||
| The entire world comes like zooming into me, like, into like, pitch black, and I shoot through this fucking kaleidoscope of colors. | ||
| Maybe 10 seconds and blow out the top like Superman out of the top of this tube of colors into pitch total black darkness. | ||
| And I'm looking at myself from like the third person. | ||
| And I'm just hovering in midair. | ||
| And everywhere that I've ever been injured or hurt is glowing blight. | ||
| Like super white. | ||
| Like the whitest white fire I've ever seen. | ||
| Like my head's on fire. | ||
| My arms and fists are... | ||
| I feel like something out of a fucking movie. | ||
| I'm just suspended in the air. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Burning. | |
| And I keep asking myself questions. | ||
| And then, I don't know if it's me, but I answer back to myself. | ||
| Right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm bugging the fuck up because you can still hear this music going. | |
| I can hear the people giggling next to me. | ||
| I can hear the next guy lighting the lighter and he's now going. | ||
| And meanwhile, I'm just burning and I'm talking to... | ||
| Myself. | ||
| About whatever question I answered, right? | ||
| And then all of a sudden, just as fast as I came in, I kind of eyes woke in. | ||
| I woke up. | ||
| And I still see the rest of the guy's room because they systematically go around the room in an order. | ||
| They're in, they're in, they're in. | ||
| She hits. | ||
| Now the pipe comes around again. | ||
| And now it's my turn again. | ||
| Now I'm really excited. | ||
| I almost wish halfway through the trip you could fucking hit it again and go back in. | ||
| So I hit it. | ||
| This time I'm thinking, yeah, I want to go back to that again. | ||
| I want to go back to where I just was. | ||
| So I fucking hit the pipe, hit the pipe, hit the pipe. | ||
| Now I hit the pipe so goddamn hard and I hold my breath, I fall over to the side. | ||
| I fall to my left side. | ||
| And I'm tipped over. | ||
| Well, I sit back up because you're still there, right? | ||
| You're not like in another dimension. | ||
| You're not out of your body experience. | ||
| So I sit back up, but the entire trip now is sideways. | ||
| And I'm looking at this trip. | ||
| I'm looking at crazy black rainbows. | ||
| And I can't explain what the fuck a black rainbow looks like, but they're waving with sparkles and black into a keyhole that's turned sideways. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And through the keyhole, a crazy light... | |
| Shapes and darts and... | ||
| Every time I almost get through this keyhole, it just sucks back more. | ||
| Something I gotta remove, like... | ||
| And then I crawl to it again. | ||
| I try to get to the keyhole. | ||
| And it sucks back again. | ||
| And there was no... | ||
| Word spoken in this one. | ||
| It was me just trying to get to this... | ||
| Sideways keyhole. | ||
| And I'd just get my hand to crawl through it. | ||
| And it would fucking take off again. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And... | |
| I woke up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And that was my DMT experience. | |
| You've only done it once? | ||
| Only done it one time. | ||
| I want to do it again. | ||
| Yeah, you need to do it again. | ||
| So they talk about marijuana. | ||
| Okay, done. | ||
| They talk about marijuana being a gateway drug. | ||
| Um... | ||
| No, DMT is a gateway drug for me. | ||
| What's a gateway drug to? | ||
| It allows you to do other drugs, and now I do a lot of mushrooms. | ||
| Well, it's one of those things where it lets you know that all your ideas about what drugs are are out the window. | ||
| Right. | ||
| All your ideas about what reality is are out the window, because you didn't think that this was a part of reality. | ||
| How could anybody ever think it before you experience it? | ||
| What I don't get is things that... | ||
| Shapes and colors that I couldn't... | ||
| Almost like you don't see today where I could see them there. | ||
| And I could have... | ||
| Like, the shapes and the movements... | ||
| It was just so weird. | ||
| Like, you're right. | ||
| Like, reality is... | ||
| Like, what the fuck was that? | ||
| How is that reality? | ||
| And it seems more vivid than reality. | ||
| More vivid... | ||
| But the cool thing I want to tell people listening, like... | ||
| You can just open your eyes, right? | ||
| I mean, you would be real hazy and kind of gone, but I could open my eyes. | ||
| I could see the candles burning over there. | ||
| I could hear lighters going. | ||
| And then you're like, oh, I'm okay. | ||
| I'm not in another dimension. | ||
| I'm not going to get stuck in this crazy other world. | ||
| And then I'd close my eyes and then I'd go back into it. | ||
| And I mean, it's like the most, the realest dream you've ever seen, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| There's another one called 5-MeO-DMT, 5-Methoxy-DMT. Is that the one we're doing tonight? | ||
| That's a different one. | ||
| That one makes people really scared. | ||
| That's a different one because you cease to exist on that one. | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's more powerful, actually. | ||
| More potent. | ||
| Yeah, which is crazy to think. | ||
| There's something more potent than DMT, but it's more psychoactive in some ways. | ||
| And it's one of those weird ones that doesn't have visuals either. | ||
| But you just go to everything. | ||
| You go to heaven. | ||
| You become a part of it all. | ||
| It was just crazy how clear... | ||
| could make of the unsenses, right? | ||
| Like I try to explain now and it sounds weird, but when I was in it, it's like everything's so clear. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But you realize how much of what's holding you back in this life is like insecurity and fear and, and, and just, just not knowing, you know, and confusion and all this stuff. | ||
| And then it just sort of like pours water on the stuff that's dirty and cleans all the bullshit out and goes, no, it's all love. | ||
| It's all happiness, friends, experiences, life, camaraderie. | ||
| Those are the important things. | ||
| You have a chance in this life to spread more of that and help other people spread more of that and keep this ball rolling. | ||
| And that could really change the world. | ||
| It changes the world because the people that you impact ripple out and they impact other people. | ||
| Or you could just get caught up in arguing with people online. | ||
| You know, you can get caught up in the water over the dirt and just the chaos of it all. | ||
| It doesn't take much to get me caught up. | ||
| But that's also why you're a great fighter. | ||
| You know, those things go hand in hand. | ||
| If you're a person who just accepted bullshit, maybe you wouldn't be the guy that gets up in the morning when you don't want to. | ||
| True. | ||
| Maybe you wouldn't be the guy that takes those fights on short notice and goes, fuck it. | ||
| Maybe you'd be the guy that would be like, you know what? | ||
| This is not the right move for my career. | ||
| I have to sit back. | ||
| You're a wild man, and that's why people love you. | ||
| But that needs to be appreciated, but also managed. | ||
| The chaos of your personality and how you approach things. | ||
| I mean, you almost fucking died in a cave for you, bro. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| This is what you do. | ||
| That's my other drug, adrenaline. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| Adrenaline, man. | ||
| The things that people are scared of, you flock to. | ||
| It's like you want to prove that you're not scared of them. | ||
| And I am. | ||
| I'm just as scared as you are. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Like skydiving. | ||
| I love it because it's like, ooh. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And we go. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| There's no if, ands, or buts when you jump out of a fucking plane. | ||
| I'm flying planes now. | ||
| Getting my pilot's license. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| I started a little while back. | ||
| I quit for a while, but now I'm back. | ||
| I'm all in. | ||
| I'm flying, and I'm lovin' it, man. | ||
| I was just telling you, I watched that Leonard Skinner documentary last night. | ||
| Don't fly a shitty plane. | ||
| That's how we lost Leonard Skinner. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They needed to get their fucking plane fixed. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Drugs. | |
| Drugs. | ||
| Fucking drugs. | ||
| Fucking pillheads, man. | ||
| The next time I'm on in two years, when I come back, I'll fly out here. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| I'll fly out here. | ||
| Yeah, man. | ||
| You're so wild, man. | ||
| That's a bold move, man. | ||
| Learn how to fly. | ||
| I mean, that's the ultimate, right? | ||
| That's... | ||
| Joe, I enjoy drinking beer with you, buddy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Me too, brother. | |
| We can see a little campfire. | ||
| We can fucking set. | ||
| We're slicing deer. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| We should. | ||
| We should definitely do that one of these days. | ||
| You should come to Lanai with us. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| You would love it, man. | ||
| It's the craziest hunting ever. | ||
| And it's like one of the most ethical... | ||
| You have to kill them. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sure. | |
| 30,000 deer on this one island. | ||
| No, 20,000 deer and 3,000 people. | ||
| Let's touch that little subject for a minute. | ||
| About... | ||
| We now have to kill these animals. | ||
| Why? | ||
| Because there's so many people out there that are like, fuck you hunters. | ||
|
unidentified
|
What are you doing? | |
| Why would you want to take a life? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, the lanai is a different example because it's an island. | ||
| It's an island filled with deer and there's no wolves and there's no mountain lions. | ||
| People have to eat them. | ||
| They're fucking everywhere. | ||
| Yeah, because if they don't, they're just going to- They're overpopulated. | ||
| They're going to die. | ||
| Yeah, of course. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But, I mean, I think the hunting thing, the anti-hunting thing is probably real similar to what we're talking about with psychedelic drugs. | ||
| It's people who haven't experienced it. | ||
| They don't know what it really is. | ||
| And a lot of them still, I mean, 97% of the people in this country eat meat. | ||
| I'm one of them. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| Yeah, but it's a crazy number when you think about how many people get hated on for hunting. | ||
| That means, for sure, some of those people that are hating also eat meat, which is one of the most crazy hypocrisies ever. | ||
| Crazy. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I mean, when you look at it like that. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| With the numbers. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because they are. | ||
| As they're eating their hamburger on the same breath, they're telling you what a piece of shit you are for killing ducks. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| It's a disconnection. | ||
| Do you think vegans, if a mosquito lands on them, do they slap it and kill it? | ||
| I talk about that all the time. | ||
| Do they kill mice that are nibbling in the corner of their house and making noise so they can't sleep? | ||
| Do they set a mousetrap out? | ||
| That's a good question. | ||
| Do they shoot the fly with the badass new salt fucking shotgun? | ||
| The salt guns are the shit. | ||
| Me, I'm picking the bitches off. | ||
| I open the door and let them. | ||
| Woof them in from the horse shit. | ||
| Come on in, boy. | ||
| They got a little bit of plapping to do in here. | ||
| So, yeah. | ||
| I mean, does a mosquito or a fly not have a soul? | ||
| I went to an ashram once, and the lady had ant spray out. | ||
| And I was like, what are you doing with that? | ||
| She's like, oh, we have an ant problem here. | ||
| I go, you got an ant problem here? | ||
| I go, so you kill them with the spray? | ||
| I go, that's fucking crazy. | ||
| This is an ashram. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| This is a Buddhist ashram and you are spraying ant spray. | ||
| You're poisoning death from the sky. | ||
| From the sky. | ||
| Yeah, like your fucking air warfare on these poor little beings because you don't like that they get too close to your garbage. | ||
| It's heavy. | ||
| It's heavy. | ||
| It's crazy. | ||
| When you put it in perspective like that, they don't have an answer. | ||
| What do you do when you wash yourself? | ||
| What about all those microbiome on your body? | ||
| You're killing all that shit with soap. | ||
| What are you doing? | ||
| What are you doing? | ||
| It's a holocaust. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Every time you wash your asshole, it's a holocaust. | |
| You're killing all this life forms, right? | ||
| No ifs, ands, or buts. | ||
| I mean, it's just a matter of what life... | ||
| And the other problem is there's real evidence that somehow or another plants communicate with each other. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| That they have some sort of – if not awareness, they have some sort of information exchange between each other. | ||
| And they change their taste based on whether or not other ones are getting eaten. | ||
| It activates certain responses in the plants and they become like really bitter and disgusting to animals so that animals don't eat them. | ||
| And they do this with – they can have a recording. | ||
| They can play a recording of caterpillars eating leaves next to a plant and it will change its flavor profile. | ||
| It excretes some sort of a chemical so that it discourages predation. | ||
| There's some intelligence to those things. | ||
| I think that's just evolving, right? | ||
| It's having to. | ||
| It's like, ooh, we're no longer going to exist if – This happens. | ||
| We have to evolve the change, which you talk about us becoming who we are today from super primates to right. | ||
| And I think now we're caught in an era where the weak are still allowed to coexist with us. | ||
| Yeah, there's a little bit of that. | ||
| They don't want to be weak. | ||
| They can't help it. | ||
| You laugh at that, but it's true. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| It's true. | ||
| And I just had a baby boy, and I can't wait to stand on the sidelines of these soccer games and football games. | ||
| And I can't wait to show up to fucking track day and I'm bringing fucking medals and trophies because my kid's not getting a fucking participation ribbon. | ||
| He's here to win, right? | ||
| When do we draw the line back of, you know, just because you are weaker, you get a participation ribbon. | ||
| There's no more competition. | ||
| There's no understanding of psychology. | ||
| You can't protect people from bad feelings like losing. | ||
| That's what propels you. | ||
| That's what makes you better. | ||
| That's what they're doing. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You're telling me if my kid's an awesome, awesome football player and he's on the team running touchdowns, he has to sit the bench because Tommy didn't get enough time to play? | ||
| And not only that, Tommy, you're his weak-ass dad who fucking secretly emails the coach behind my back? | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Like that shit to me, what the fuck? | ||
| So I'm so excited to join this new journey of parenthood. | ||
| It's so crazy, man, these kids. | ||
| It's not all parents, though. | ||
| Some parents realize how stupid it is. | ||
| There's parents out there just like you. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Just like, this is ridiculous. | ||
| Like, kids have got... | ||
| This is a guy that's... | ||
| His daughter goes to school with my daughter, and I always gravitate towards him because he's got a neck tattoo. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Immediately, I'm like, anybody with a neck tattoo, I'll relate to this motherfucker. | ||
| Well, because that's a life decision. | ||
| Yeah, you're... | ||
| You neck tat, you... | ||
| Motherfucker, we gonna be alright because we're... | ||
| I don't have an egg cat, but I know how you're living, so I'm with you. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
| These kids were playing rough, and he looked at me and goes, whatever happened to getting hurt? | ||
| Whatever happened to falling down and learning how, oh, well, you shouldn't do that. | ||
| That hurts. | ||
| Well, now I'll learn how to fall better. | ||
| Now I'll learn how to not do that anymore. | ||
| Well, this thing was going to make you slip and scuff your knee. | ||
| It's okay. | ||
| That's part of learning. | ||
| You can't nerf the world. | ||
| You can't nerf the fucking world. | ||
| When you nerf the world and then you empower these people that have lived in a nerfed environment, that's a problem. | ||
| They haven't experienced real adversity and they're mean. | ||
| One of the reasons why they're mean is because they're scared. | ||
| Like a lot of these people on social media that are really mean, they're the ones who are the most scared and they're the ones who are the most weak for sure. | ||
| And the fact that they're so vulnerable is what's leading them to lash out and try to hurt other people because they're so easy to hurt and they're so damaged. | ||
| I mean, that's literally the results of living in a nerfed world. | ||
| But these people that you say are so weak, how is that satisfying them to disable somebody that's not? | ||
| They don't know what to do. | ||
| They're hurting and they just lash out. | ||
| Like, how are they writing an email? | ||
| Like, I'm going to get this motherfucker. | ||
| Send. | ||
| And they're like, ooh, and then they see this... | ||
|
unidentified
|
What? | |
| That's gratifying for them? | ||
| It's not even. | ||
| It seems like it would be because they're trying to hurt you. | ||
| They're trying to get you. | ||
| But then eventually it comes back and gets them. | ||
| It's like they have to understand LeBron James isn't doing that. | ||
| No. | ||
| No winners are out there doing that. | ||
| This is loser behavior. | ||
| You're lashing out at others who are doing while you're not. | ||
| Unless there's like... | ||
| If you have a legitimate problem with someone... | ||
| You talk about LeBron like... | ||
| In the NBA, they don't just sit him down because the other player, 22, hasn't got enough play time. | ||
| Hasn't got enough play time. | ||
| Right. | ||
| No. | ||
| Motherfucker, go ahead and score again. | ||
| We're with you right here. | ||
| We've got to make some money. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| It's good when we're paying to watch it on TV, but when your kid's in it, I don't get it, man. | ||
| But I haven't experienced it yet. | ||
| I've only had friends who have, so I'm fucking so excited. | ||
| It's fascinating just to watch them evolve, watch their little minds grow. | ||
| Talking to them, you know, just experiencing life through these new eyes and seeing them learn things. | ||
| He's definitely going to be a little fighter. | ||
| He's just a rotten son of a bitch. | ||
| He sleeps with his hands up. | ||
| He sleeps with his hands up, both hands up. | ||
| Like, what are you doing? | ||
| And he just like flexes them out and he'll put them back and he flexes them out. | ||
| I'm like, what are you doing, man? | ||
| It's so cool. | ||
| I put him in this little jumper and he has two, he has a blue frog and this red fish. | ||
| And I don't know what this red fish did to him, but that motherfucker would just slide sideways and just look stank on him for, just sit there and stare at him. | ||
| 20 minutes, no movement, no crying, just slouched over and he cornered pairs at this red fish. | ||
| And I'm like, what? | ||
| Dude, what are you doing? | ||
| And I'll spin him and play with him, and then he just finds him again and just has a staring contest with this fucking thing. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| He's practicing. | ||
| He's practicing. | ||
| I think that shit definitely carries on through the child. | ||
| It has to, right? | ||
| It has to. | ||
| I mean, there's things that people learn, like, well, why are kids scared of monsters? | ||
| Well, you have to be careful of predators. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You know? | ||
| Of course. | ||
| There's lessons you learn. | ||
| You see things that are scary. | ||
| Like, why do people have, like, a fear of snakes? | ||
| Are we out of beers? | ||
| Is this the last one? | ||
| No, we got a whole shitload in the back. | ||
| Oh, perfect. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| These Budweiser go down so smooth. | ||
| They do go down so smooth. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I think, for sure, there's some of your personality that's going to be transferred through your DNA. Your life lessons. | ||
| God, I can't wait, man. | ||
| I'm so excited. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So cool to see them. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| How early are you going to start training him? | ||
| Right away. | ||
| So he never knows anything else? | ||
| Not only Joe, he's not going to know anything else, but... | ||
| We're dirt biking. | ||
| We're wakeboarding. | ||
| We're fucking scuba diving. | ||
| We're... | ||
| Every crazy thing I do, he's going to do it. | ||
| He's going to be fucking launching huge air. | ||
| And he's going to get around his other kids and he's just going to think that's just what you do. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Oh, you guys don't do that? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Oh, that's... | ||
| I've been doing that for five years. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| So he won't know any different. | ||
| And yeah, I would definitely train him in wrestling and jujitsu and kickboxing. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| Absolutely. | ||
| And I'm going to be the dad when he goes and beats a kid up at school. | ||
| I'm like, what? | ||
| Danger? | ||
| You fucking animal! | ||
| His name is Danger? | ||
| Your son's name is Danger? | ||
| His first name is Daxson. | ||
| My name is Donald Anthony Cerrone, so his name is D-A-C, my initials, and then S-O-N, so he's my son. | ||
| Danger Cerrone. | ||
| Daxson Danger Cerrone. | ||
| I'm going to say, Danger, what are you doing in here? | ||
| You can't be beating these kids up and as soon as we get in the hallway, fucking fist bump, whatever you want, boy. | ||
| Let's go. | ||
| Well, you already have evidence now on video. | ||
| You need to watch this video. | ||
| I mean, if he's in there defending his sisters or doing whatever he has to do, I'm with him. | ||
| Get you some, boy. | ||
| What's the world going to be like? | ||
| In 10 years. | ||
| Think about how weird it is from 10 years ago. | ||
| I remember in my high school we had beepers. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| Remember when people had beepers that also could send text messages? | ||
| Like, what the fuck? | ||
| You're taking it too far. | ||
| You could leave a voice message on mine. | ||
| You could talk a voice or you could call and listen to it. | ||
| But yeah, I mean, these kids, your kids, have no idea what it is to pass a note. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Or call Mr. Rogan. | ||
| I was just wondering if I could talk with Sarah. | ||
| Would that be cool? | ||
| It's after 9 o'clock, idiot. | ||
| Click. | ||
| Yeah, that after 9 o'clock deal. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You have to be real careful what time you call. | ||
| You set a bad precedent. | ||
| Picture-taking. | ||
| But I think the picture-taking is also taking a lot away from life. | ||
| Like, even me, I get caught in it. | ||
| I'll go to lunch with three of my friends, and two minutes into lunch, we're all Instagram. | ||
| Who's Rogan got on the show today? | ||
| You know? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I know. | ||
| It is a problem. | ||
| You lose a lot of your life to these fucking things. | ||
| A lot of it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it sucks you in. | ||
| But it's also so awesome because... | ||
| So much is learned, like you said. | ||
| It needs to be managed. | ||
| Right now, if you want to talk about... | ||
| We were just discussing the different kinds of releases on the bow. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Maybe I don't know about you. | ||
| Literally, two seconds after I leave here, I can YouTube it and I can... | ||
| You can know it all. | ||
| I can know it all. | ||
| Yeah, it's crazy. | ||
| I can have experts on every single release, make my own judgment, and decide what I want to do. | ||
| And that's crazy nowadays. | ||
| The world is... | ||
| So much better in a sense, I think, because you can do that, but it takes away a lot of the bullshit people used to have. | ||
| Probably when you were in school and the guy tells you, I'm this, this, this, and this, there's nobody other than Jimmy saying, uh-huh, yeah, I was there. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| Yeah, he never knew. | ||
| Now you just go ahead and like, wait, what? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nah, man, that's negative. | |
| You are not a gold medalist, right? | ||
| Well, you'll still see some of those guys are still floating around. | ||
| There's a few of those guys that are still floating around that somehow or another made it through the net. | ||
| They came in in a dark net. | ||
| They're floating around right now, kind of like... | ||
| Skating on the boundaries of incredulity. | ||
| It's so bizarre. | ||
| Yeah, there's a lot of frauds out there. | ||
| They're still kind of operating. | ||
| Fake black belts, fake gold medalists, fake... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Why would you want to be a fake black belt? | ||
| They don't know any better. | ||
| They've just been lying their whole life, mostly. | ||
| It's like the demons that you experience when you do mushrooms, they got their own demons. | ||
| And maybe it was childhood molestation. | ||
| So you think those people that lie, that's just what they do? | ||
| They were probably beaten as kids. | ||
| Their parents were shit. | ||
| Everybody lied to them. | ||
| Why does it have to be that person? | ||
| Why does it have to be that person? | ||
| Why can't it be the rich kid that was born in Beverly Hills, that has everything... | ||
| And he lies too? | ||
| He's still a liar. | ||
| Why can't he be this big of a piece of shit as them? | ||
| He could be. | ||
| But I bet a lot of those real severe liars, they come from abuse because they have to create a false life. | ||
| But you get a lot of abuse in rich households too. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| Especially maybe the dad has to work 16 hours a day as a banker or something like that. | ||
| He's never home. | ||
| The mom's on drugs. | ||
| No one's taking care of the kids. | ||
| They're hanging around with a bunch of other lost kids in their school and they're all doing drugs together and fucking off. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Crime and all kinds of shit just to have excitement in their life because they're so bored and confused and lost and lonely. | ||
| And they start lying too. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I mean, it all comes from the same place, whether it comes from a rich kid or a poor kid. | ||
| It comes from your life being fucked up and you're not liking who you are. | ||
| So you need to eat mushrooms. | ||
| That'll help. | ||
| And deal with the demons. | ||
| Deal with the demons. | ||
| And then go do something. | ||
| Go do something so that you know that you could... | ||
| You could experience some nerves. | ||
| You know, and you could rise to the occasion. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| And learn about yourself that you can overcome. | ||
| You can make mistakes and fail and then try it again and succeed. | ||
| And then the bad feelings that you get, like when you're worried about losing, you know, and these fears, it's because winning is so high, man. | ||
| I've seen you win so many times. | ||
| I've called so many of your fights. | ||
| And, you know, I look right in your eyes whenever you win and they're just like, this dude's on fire right now. | ||
| He's just like... | ||
| There's no other... | ||
| I couldn't even explain to you that feeling because... | ||
| No one can. | ||
| Nobody can. | ||
| No one can. | ||
| You have to do it. | ||
| Other than... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck! | |
| Fuck yeah! | ||
| Right? | ||
| Fuck yeah! | ||
| That's the feeling. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Like, that's... | ||
| But it's fuck yeah times like a million. | ||
| You know? | ||
| You know? | ||
| And... | ||
| God, it's the highest highs, man. | ||
| It's just insane how cool it feels. | ||
| I've seen, like, with you particularly, like, chaos. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like, there's something about chaos when you just crack someone, and then it's over, and then you're walking around, and you're, like, glowing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm in my DMT. Yeah, you did it. | |
| You went through all the fucking demons, and all the darkness, and all the fear, and all the insecurity, and then you landed, and then it's over. | ||
| And then it's just as fast as it started, it's over. | ||
| And that's crazy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And that's over. | ||
| And now you're back. | ||
| And then it's like, hey, four weeks from now, blah, blah, blah, fell out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What are you going to do? | ||
| Like, we're going to fucking do it again. | ||
| We're going to start over. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| We're going to start all over. | ||
| And people always ask me, like, how long are you going to fight till? | ||
| I'm going to fight till I don't love it anymore, Joe. | ||
| I really am, man. | ||
| I don't have an answer for anybody. | ||
| It's a good answer. | ||
| The day that I wake up and I'm like, nah. | ||
| Nah. | ||
| What we need is medical science to catch up where they could fix everything 100%. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Like head injuries, nose injuries, everything. | ||
| Just put people in some sort of microwave machine where they just... | ||
| Bring it back to 100%. | ||
| Thank you, sir. | ||
| So then fighting becomes a matter of temporary injury rather than permanent injury. | ||
| And then it's a whole other ball of wax. | ||
| It's a whole other ball of wax. | ||
| Everyone's fighting 100% healthy. | ||
| Yeah, and you also don't have to worry about your long-term health, which is one of the big problems with fighting. | ||
| Yeah, you're like, you want to armbar me and break it? | ||
| Did you see the guy who got his motherfucking arm cracked the last fight? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Was it last Friday? | ||
| Lincoln, Nebraska. | ||
| I didn't see it. | ||
| Who got armbarred? | ||
| A guy from Colorado. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I watched the Krause fight, and I watched the Gagey fight. | |
| The Brazilian guy took him down, armbarred him. | ||
| Snapped it? | ||
| No, I didn't snap it, popped it, and pulled it all the way back and had it bent. | ||
| He said, man, I felt it pop, but I told myself, we ain't losing this, and he just kept on going. | ||
| It's moments like that that you could just say... | ||
| Fuck it, break it, because I'm going in this microwave. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I'm going right from here, ambulance to the microwave. | ||
| Ten minutes, I'm fucking... | ||
| I'm going to go recook me. | ||
| Yeah, recook me. | ||
| That's possible someday. | ||
| I mean, maybe it's not in our lifetimes, but it's possible someday. | ||
| And fighting's going to be a different thing. | ||
| Like, that was what was so impressive about John when Vitor got his arm. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Vitor turned... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, here it is. | |
| Look at this. | ||
| Oh, Jesus. | ||
| Wait till he... | ||
| Oh man, this is nasty. | ||
| This is right rate tap. | ||
| He taps right here, but before... | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know. | |
| I don't know what to say. | ||
| Yeah, before this, he puts it behind his back and he has it fucking bowed. | ||
| This guy used to train at Jacksons too. | ||
| The Brazilian guy on the bottom. | ||
| Yeah, when John got tapped by Vitor, that was so nasty. | ||
| I mean, he was fully hyperextended. | ||
| And his arm was fucked up for a while after, right? | ||
| That's why he had to host the Ultimate Fighter. | ||
| Correct. | ||
| He really couldn't train properly with it. | ||
| Yeah, that's going to be a different animal in the future when people aren't worried as much about permanent damage. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I hope I need it because I do a lot of permanent damage. | ||
| Yeah, the most damage today is permanent damage. | ||
| All these wild excursions I go on. | ||
| Yeah, tell me about the cave dive. | ||
| So you want to learn about cave diving? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Okay. | |
| So, first of all, cave diving is the last certification someone can get caving, right? | ||
| In diving. | ||
| Like, you start off to get your open water, then you move and get your advanced open water, get your nitrox, and you start learning the rules. | ||
| Of Mother Nature because Mother Nature is never going to take a loss. | ||
| She wins every time. | ||
| The only bitch I know that wins 100% of the time, right? | ||
| You cannot fuck with her and come out winning. | ||
| So when she wants to take you, she takes you. | ||
| So you learn about all these different rules of the water and of the nitrogen levels that you're taking into your body. | ||
| Anyway, cave diving is... | ||
| About five years in. | ||
| I got my certification in high school. | ||
| And I am a super cave diver, man. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| I love diving. | ||
| I love everything about diving. | ||
| I love ship diving. | ||
| So no days, caves, you name it. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| So we were in Cozumel a couple weeks ago. | ||
| And one of my old... | ||
| You could almost call him an instructor. | ||
| He's taught me a lot of what I know about diving today. | ||
| We... | ||
| Dove three or four days with some buddies of mine that were down in Cozumel, just went through some ships, went through some... | ||
| It's the coral reef, just playing around, dying with them. | ||
| And then we go and do a serious dive. | ||
| He's getting a little bit older. | ||
| His mind is still very, very, very sharp, but his motor skills... | ||
| Don't keep up with them much anymore, right? | ||
| In cave diving, it's a very necessity that you need. | ||
| So, we jump in this cave. | ||
| Let's rewind 20 minutes. | ||
| I just kissed my girl and my new baby. | ||
| And she's like, I don't really want you to go, right? | ||
| I don't... | ||
| I don't want to say his name, but the guy you're going with, I'm worried. | ||
| Mm-hmm. | ||
| I said, what are you worried about? | ||
| I said, I'm coming home. | ||
| This is what I, I come home every time. | ||
| I'm coming home. | ||
| Fuck, I don't know. | ||
| So I pick up another, I order another cylinder of air just for X. So I have two, originally I'm going with, I order another cylinder of air just, I told her just for, just for, just to fucking have it, right? | ||
| No one's ever died because they have too much air. | ||
| In cave diving, you dive in third. | ||
| So, if we have 300 PSI, we'll do 1,000 PSI in. | ||
| We'll do 1,000 PSI out. | ||
| And we have 1,000 PSI in case something fucking happens. | ||
| Also, in cave diving, they have lines. | ||
| You run these. | ||
| In a cave, they'll already have a line run. | ||
| A bunch of guys like me, tech divers, have gone into caves. | ||
| They discovered them. | ||
| They mapped them. | ||
| They named them. | ||
| They put lines so you can follow them in case something happens, right? | ||
| Get in and get out. | ||
| Lines and lines and none of the lines really connect except for like the main lines. | ||
| They'll have like three or four main lines down big channels of the cave because caves are huge, right? | ||
| From an entrance to the main line, usually no one has a cave. | ||
| You have to make what's called a jump. | ||
| You have to make your own line because they just don't want someone listening on here today to go find a cave, jump in, swim down and be able to get in and out and get lost in there. | ||
| Now all of a sudden we have a Thailand incident and we're fucking going to save people. | ||
| So you make a jump, tie off, you put these direction arrows down. | ||
| They're called cookies, right? | ||
| Pointing out towards the direction out of the cave. | ||
| So that way if something happens, you come out. | ||
| When you make a jump, you take your light, you wrap it around your neck, and then you have two hands that work on the line. | ||
| The guy I was with didn't follow some of our rules. | ||
| And in cave diving, it's kind of an unwritten fact that You only worry about you, I'm coming home. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I'm fucking staying alive. | ||
| So if Joe, me and I were cave diving, something were to happen, I'm not going in there to get you. | ||
| No reason for two of us to die when only one's in there can die. | ||
| So he tries to tie off his buoyancy, he fucking hits the roof of the cave, kicks his feet, spins, and now all of a sudden this line that's supposed to be tied off, which is our fucking lifeline, is now wrapped around him. | ||
| So I swim over to him and I try to help him unhook this line. | ||
| And he goes into panic and panic kills everybody involved. | ||
| Everybody involved dies with panic and that's something that I can't express enough. | ||
| So he starts fucking freaking out, hitting the roof, spinning, silt fucking everywhere and I just back out. | ||
| Take about four or five big strong steps back. | ||
| And I grab a hold of the main line. | ||
| Now it's silting out. | ||
| Now when I see something silting out, there's all this like sediment that ends on the bottom of these caves. | ||
| And you're in like a little tiny room. | ||
| So if you kick your fin hard, it kicks up like dark dust, mud, sediment, silt. | ||
| You can't fucking see anything. | ||
| Blacks it out. | ||
| So I back out of the silt. | ||
| I grab the line. | ||
| And I see him and they're fucking freaking and panicking and spinning and rolling around and getting all caught up in this line. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And I'm like, fuck! | |
| I just stay calm. | ||
| This was the exit. | ||
| I know where it is because I know where I am. | ||
| There's the exit. | ||
| He was making a jump to go down another tunnel. | ||
| There he is. | ||
| Now, what I just tell you about the rule that someone comes home, right? | ||
| I broke the rule and I went in to get him. | ||
| I said, fuck the guy down. | ||
| So I let go of the line. | ||
| And I go in to get him because his light fucking is off now. | ||
| And I'm thinking, God damn it, he spun up in this line. | ||
| His light's off. | ||
| Did he drop his regulator? | ||
| Does he have air? | ||
| Is he okay? | ||
| Soon as I go into the sill, fucking lose everything, man. | ||
| Lose everything. | ||
| My way, where I am, my up, my down. | ||
| I don't know where I am. | ||
| I'm fucking panicking now. | ||
| I'm panicking! | ||
| Fucking freaking out more than any I've ever... | ||
| Breathing hard. | ||
| Bang! | ||
| Hit my head on the fucking ceiling. | ||
| And I just close my eyes. | ||
| I'm like, God damn it, Cal, calm the fuck down. | ||
| Calm the fuck down. | ||
| Calm the fuck down. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Breathe. | |
| Can't even see my hands in front of me. | ||
| I have two watches on. | ||
| They're glowing, right? | ||
| Those are my... | ||
| They let me know my depth, my time, everything, right? | ||
| I have two dive computers. | ||
| I check them. | ||
| I look. | ||
| I calm. | ||
| I check my light. | ||
| I got to turn my light and burn my pressure gauges. | ||
| They're glow in the dark, right? | ||
| So I charge it with my light and I look at it. | ||
| Okay, air. | ||
| Check my second one. | ||
| Okay, air. | ||
| I know my third one's good because I haven't even opened it yet. | ||
| That's just in case. | ||
| I breathe down and I fucking think. | ||
| And I can't even see my hands in front of me. | ||
| And to this day, I close my eyes and it gives me nightmares right now. | ||
| Just thinking about it. | ||
| Cloudy, dark, can't see anything. | ||
| All I can see is the hum of my light. | ||
| So I turn my light off. | ||
| And I'm trying to think like, all right, just calm yourself. | ||
| Figure this out. | ||
| Where's our partner? | ||
| I start feeling around and he's nowhere to be found, right? | ||
| Nowhere to be found. | ||
| So now I've calmed myself a little bit and I start feeling the walls and I start moving around. | ||
| I'm trying to think, where am I? But I don't know because we haven't been down this channel yet. | ||
| So I don't visually haven't made an imprint of, oh, there's that, there's this, right? | ||
| Kind of like a mental imprint in my mind because that's what we're doing as we're coming in. | ||
| Landmarks, right? | ||
| I don't have any of those. | ||
| I don't have any feel. | ||
| I don't have any touch. | ||
| And I'm moving around, moving around. | ||
| We took a compass reading of the direction of the front when we tied up at the first jump, right? | ||
| So I know 126 degrees is the way out. | ||
| But in a cave, they twist and they move and they're up and they're big and they're deep and they're low, right? | ||
| There's no rhyme or reason how the water made the cave. | ||
| So... | ||
| It's kind of a direction I can think of. | ||
| The first thing that comes to my mind, I start swimming that way. | ||
| Now I hit a wall. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| And I go down, I hit a wall. | ||
| And I'm fucking in panic mode again. | ||
| I fucking swim. | ||
| Now I just start swimming and kicking and fucking going crazy. | ||
| I make my way out of the silt and I fucking turn around and I'm back on the main line. | ||
| Right? | ||
| I find the main line to the cave again, which is 800 yards to the front, to the door. | ||
| I grab ahold of the main line. | ||
| I fucking reel it in again. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Now, the entire behind me, deeper into the cave, is free. | ||
| It's no problem. | ||
| Silt free. | ||
| I can see everything's good. | ||
| Where I need to go is fucking silted out and blown gone. | ||
| Completely fucking washed. | ||
| I couldn't see you sitting there, but I can see everything behind us. | ||
| I can't see you. | ||
| I have the main line, but I don't have the jump line to get the fuck out. | ||
| So I started thinking, I was looking at the cave maps, trying, like, before we went, just trying to get a video of the direction. | ||
| I'm trying to remember landmarks. | ||
| But I can't see anything, and I can't feel it. | ||
| And I'm like, fuck! | ||
| There was a split up here. | ||
| So I start, I go back into the silt again. | ||
| And I start feeling around, and I'm feeling, and I find a hole, and I'm like, is that the right way? | ||
| Is that the one I want to go down? | ||
| Where does that one go? | ||
| Okay, maybe, remember, remember, remember, remember, that's not, okay, let's go to this next one. | ||
| I'm going to the next one, and now this is where it's got to be. | ||
| I'm going, but all of a sudden, I'm swimming against the current, and I remember when I came into this cave, there was this very slow current, which is why the entire cave is now washed out from that point on, right? | ||
| The current is taking out, so I'm like, fuck, you're swimming against the current, so you're going the wrong way. | ||
| I somehow worked that into my fucking panic mind. | ||
| Like, we're swimming into the current, we're swimming into the current, or we're going the wrong way. | ||
| So I fucking turn, swim back, I'm back on the fucking main line again, right? | ||
| I find the main line, out into the clear main line. | ||
| Fuck! | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck! | |
| I start like hyperventing and panicking. | ||
| And I'm thinking, man, are you fucking you piece of shit? | ||
| This is how people die. | ||
| What the fuck are you? | ||
| Right? | ||
| And I'm keep reminding, kissing my wife and keep my kids saying, I'm coming home today. | ||
| I'm coming home. | ||
| I'm coming home. | ||
| So I do it again. | ||
| I fucking venture into the fucking great unknown fucking abyss, total blackout. | ||
| Another panic. | ||
| Another panic. | ||
| Fucking freak out. | ||
| Can't find my way. | ||
| Hitting my head. | ||
| Kicking. | ||
| Losing air by the fucking second, bro. | ||
| Because now I'm breathing hard. | ||
| I'm breathing fucking irrational. | ||
| And I'm sucking my tanks dry. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Mind you, I'm on air so I don't have... | ||
| There's no answer to this after I breathe my last breath. | ||
| Keep checking my thing. | ||
| Keep keeping my time. | ||
| Look in the direction. | ||
| Time. | ||
| Time. | ||
| Air. | ||
| Time. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Fuck. | |
| Slow down. | ||
| Now I'm in pitch fucking black. | ||
| Can't see anything. | ||
| Trying to figure out where I'm at. | ||
| What I'm thinking. | ||
| What am I doing? | ||
| Okay. | ||
| We're running out of air. | ||
| How much time do we have? | ||
| We're at 28 feet. | ||
| I know we're at 28 feet. | ||
| I could probably breathe on this for about another hour on this tank. | ||
| Another hour. | ||
| So we got another hour. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| We've been in here fucking 38 minutes already. | ||
|
unidentified
|
How? | |
| What are we going to do? | ||
| Start trying to find my way out, I can't. | ||
| Trying to find my way out, I can't. | ||
| Now I start thinking, what am I going to do? | ||
| I'm not going to drown, Joe. | ||
| Drowning is like my biggest fear of my life. | ||
| So we have a thing that's called a BC and we carry it on our back. | ||
| It's a buoyancy control device. | ||
| That's how you control your buoyancy when you're scuba diving, right? | ||
| It probably holds 20 big, huge, strong breasts. | ||
| Fill that motherfucker up. | ||
| This is my plan. | ||
| Fill my BC up. | ||
| Which throws me to the top of the cave. | ||
| Bonk. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Now I'm only... | ||
| Now I gotta flip upside down. | ||
| And I have to like crawl on the ceiling trying to figure out where the fuck I am. | ||
| How am I... Now I gotta get out of the cave upside down. | ||
| And I'm thinking, alright. | ||
| We've switched to our last bit of air. | ||
| How are we gonna do this, cowboy? | ||
| What are we gonna do? | ||
| Filled our BC up. | ||
| When I run out of air, I'm now thinking in my mind, how am I going to die, Joe? | ||
| Right? | ||
| Tell my wife, tell my kid, I'm not fucking, I'm coming home. | ||
| Now I got to fucking realize how am I going to die? | ||
| I have a notepad that you carry in your pocket to draw and write on. | ||
| I'm thinking, what are you going to say? | ||
| What's your letter going to be? | ||
| You're writing a fucking death letter? | ||
| You're awake. | ||
| You're a fighter. | ||
| We figured this out. | ||
| We don't fucking find a way to quit, you fucking bitch. | ||
| This is a conversation I'm having with myself while I'm in fucking complete panic mode, in complete darkness, thinking that this is how people die. | ||
| What the fuck are you doing? | ||
| You're going to write a letter to your fucking kid and tell her how you fucked up? | ||
| I'm sorry, daddy's not coming home? | ||
| So I'm fucking thinking I'm not going to drown. | ||
| I'm not going to breathe my last breath. | ||
| So I'm going to breathe this BC that I just filled up with air and I'm going to fucking breathe it until the oxygen level no longer happens and I just pass out. | ||
| That's what I've come to realize how I'm going to die. | ||
| I'm going to fucking just slip away and pass out, keep breathing the same air until I go away. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And I start thinking, you fucking piece of shit. | |
| You're giving up. | ||
| You're having legitimate conversations with myself while fucking in complete panic. | ||
| You're going to quit. | ||
| You're writing a letter and you're going to fucking breathe your last air until you pass out, you fucking pussy. | ||
| You're a fighter. | ||
| Figure the fuck out. | ||
| So I'm upside down. | ||
| I'm crawling on the ceiling. | ||
| I remember when I came in. | ||
| We came in the big cave and there's a huge fucking crack that runs along the top. | ||
| Turn both my watches off now at this point because they're giving off light and I kill my light. | ||
| I said, that crack's going to fucking lead to the surface. | ||
| That crack's going to fucking give us something. | ||
| So I just start panicking me, panicking again because I'm panicking and I don't know what to do. | ||
| I'm sucking air and I'm fucking breathing hard and I'm hyperventilating. | ||
| I'm crawling on the ceiling, crawling on the ceiling, looking for this fucking crack and goddammit, I found it. | ||
| I found the crack. | ||
| And I followed the crack. | ||
| And the crack got bigger. | ||
| And all of a sudden I see fucking glow. | ||
| Like green glow. | ||
| Crawl on, crawl on, crawl on. | ||
| Find it. | ||
| Try to get up. | ||
| My tanks are too big. | ||
| I can't fucking get out of the little hole. | ||
| I can't get out of the hole. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I'm fucking bink, bink, bink, bink, bink. | |
| Fucking hitting, screaming, freaking out. | ||
| Calm down cowboy. | ||
| Calm down cowboy. | ||
| This is the way. | ||
| Calm the fuck down. | ||
| Reel it in. | ||
| Reel it in. | ||
| We're here. | ||
| We made it. | ||
| Grab control. | ||
| Follow the cracks more. | ||
| Opens up. | ||
| Out. | ||
| Boom. | ||
| There's the cave. | ||
| Fucking I'm out. | ||
| Made it. | ||
| You're coming home. | ||
| You want to talk about... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Motherfucking war! | |
| Right? | ||
| That was the feeling. | ||
| Meanwhile, my guy's out there. | ||
| I can't even be mad at him because he panicked. | ||
| He grabbed the line. | ||
| He fucking ran out the hole. | ||
| He looks at me and he says... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Um... | |
| So we're not diving together ever again, are we? | ||
| I said, no. | ||
| That was it. | ||
| That was it. | ||
| And I text my girl, I love you, baby. | ||
| And today was a fucking scary moment. | ||
| But daddy's coming home. | ||
| And it was fucking so crazy because that was... | ||
| I mean, I've almost died numerous times, but almost dying slowly, which puts it in perspective to me, like, these guys on death row, I always thought, like, yeah, fucking kill a murderer, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
That's... | |
| Fuck them. | ||
| Dude, knowing the time and how much time you have left, that's some scary shit, Joe. | ||
| Knowing that you have two hours left. | ||
| How much energy have left at the end? | ||
| Maybe another hour, probably. | ||
| An hour and some change. | ||
| But, could you imagine? | ||
| I had to talk to myself of how I was going to die. | ||
| Like, to me, that fucked me up. | ||
| That fucked me up really bad. | ||
| Like, I probably had to go do some mushrooms and ask myself some questions now because that fucked me up bad, but the inner me, the fighter, the you do new ferret the fuck out. | ||
| But, was I going to write a letter? | ||
| I was fucking damn close to writing a letter. | ||
| It was crazy, man. | ||
| It was wild. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Hopefully I explained that good for everybody. | ||
| You explained it like a motherfucker. | ||
| Yeah, I'm nervous. | ||
| I felt like I was there. | ||
| Fuck, dude. | ||
| That is crazy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Man. | ||
| And I'm going to do it again. | ||
| Like, I'm not scared of it. | ||
| Like, that just needs to be done better. | ||
| I'll run my own motherfucking line. | ||
| Well, it also shows you how important it is, like, what your wife was saying. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You can't... | ||
| She knew something. | ||
| She had a sense. | ||
| When people fuck up a lot or when they're just that person that just can't keep it together, you gotta be real careful around those people. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Fucking crazy shit, man. | ||
| I mean, that's why people kill those people in war. | ||
| You know, they're just like, look, we can't do this. | ||
| Yeah, we can't. | ||
| You're getting everybody killed. | ||
| Yeah, your panic is, sorry. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, you're not hanging in there. | |
| You've become a detriment. | ||
| Fuck, dude. | ||
| That is one of the craziest stories I've ever heard in my life. | ||
| I'm glad I got to share it with you. | ||
| It's fucking impressive. | ||
| Let's move on. | ||
| I don't know how we can. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I don't know how we can move past that one, man. | |
| Fuck. | ||
| So as the Tap Out guys did for me, I'm starting a new fight series, Cowboy Fight Series, man. | ||
| Amateur. | ||
| And we're traveling all around the country, and we're going to be putting shows up. | ||
| And I'm going to try and find these new up-and-coming kids and bring them to the ranch. | ||
| What are you doing it on? | ||
| Well, I was talking about Ant with Fight Pass. | ||
| I think we're going to get it on UFC Fight Pass. | ||
| Nice. | ||
| And, yeah, we're going to have probably eight undercard fights. | ||
| Probably two local guys in that area. | ||
| And then we're going to do a four-man tournament for the assigned weight class. | ||
| We'll probably go, I don't know, maybe like a 70 or 85, maybe 55 first. | ||
| And the winner of the four-man tournament gets to come live with me. | ||
| Train, get brought up. | ||
| I know everybody, man. | ||
| I can make a call and get them on all the local promotions. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Get them, build these guys up and try and give back, man. | ||
| And do like what the tap out guys did for me and just really, I don't know. | ||
| That's a great idea. | ||
| Do you think you're going to transition into promoting or managing or anything or training when you're done? | ||
| I won't do any training. | ||
| No? | ||
| No. | ||
| When I round the corner in life, I ain't looking back, Joe. | ||
| When I finally hit the corner, I ain't looking back. | ||
| But I'll definitely help these dudes out, man. | ||
| I'll figure it out. | ||
| Him, her, whatever it may be. | ||
| You have no desire to train people. | ||
| People tell me I can teach very well. | ||
| I just don't agree. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Maybe it'll be something that'll be more interesting to you when you're not competing. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| You know, but I'm hoping I move into the movies. | ||
| I'm going to be a movie star. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, that sounds like fun. | ||
| I just did Equalizer 2 with Denzel Washington. | ||
| It was a lot of fun. | ||
| I had a small partner, but I'm with the Dash now, Brand X guys, and doing a lot of stunts and having fun with that. | ||
| How's Denzel? | ||
| He's great. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Great dude. | ||
| Great dude. | ||
| Never met him. | ||
| Yeah, he was cool. | ||
| He was super cool to me. | ||
| Super nice. | ||
| It was fun. | ||
| It was fun working. | ||
| You know, I worked on a movie with Jay Haran. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| He's in that, too. | ||
| Yeah, he's in that, too. | ||
| It was cool. | ||
| Denzel's an Uber driver, and Jay fights him in a car. | ||
| It was pretty cool. | ||
| Denzel's one of the greatest actors that's ever lived. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Absolutely. | |
| I agree with you. | ||
| 100%. | ||
| You go over, like, some of the greatest actors that's ever lived, you've got to have him on that list. | ||
| Like, you've got a chance to work with one of the all-time greats. | ||
| And he's so cool as a Cadillac out there, man. | ||
| He's just, you know? | ||
| Is it weird to be working with him? | ||
| It kind of was, but he was real. | ||
| I mean, on set, watching Dendell, and then Denzel on set is kind of different. | ||
| But he, you know, a lot of the... | ||
| There he is. | ||
| There's Jay. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| That's cool, right? | ||
| It was fun, man. | ||
| It was such a learning experience. | ||
| Anyways, I was here last week, and I met with Pete Berg. | ||
| Who's the director. | ||
| He just did that Mile 22. Yeah. | ||
| And I just got on a new Mark Wahlberg movie. | ||
| So I got a smaller thing on that, but he asked me to do the fight choreograph for the whole movie. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Pumped on it, man. | ||
| I'm excited. | ||
| Working with the guys doing that. | ||
| It should be fun. | ||
| So you enjoy it? | ||
| Love it. | ||
| It's cool. | ||
| It's just another avenue. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Just another something fun to do. | ||
| No, that'd be a good transition for you. | ||
| You know, so that's kind of my plan. | ||
| But last night, over a game at Baccarat, I'm going to be a new race car driver. | ||
| How'd that happen? | ||
| My buddy, Ricky Stenhouse Jr., he has a dirt track race team. | ||
| So, January, it's called the Chili Bowl. | ||
| Chili Bowl? | ||
| Chili Bowl, 300 entries. | ||
| And you take over five days, you race, and you work your way up to enter the Saturday night of the Chili Bowl, and you get down there. | ||
| Dude, these are 400-horsepower cars. | ||
| You know, and, or, excuse me, they weigh 400 pounds. | ||
| Man, I don't know what it is. | ||
| I can't tell. | ||
| Like, I don't know. | ||
| I don't know anything about it. | ||
| They weigh more than 400 pounds, right? | ||
| They're 400 horsepower, but they weigh 900 pounds. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Really? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, my God. | ||
| And the dirt track. | ||
| That's insane. | ||
| Do you have some video of Chili Bowl? | ||
| 400 horsepower, 900 pounds is insane. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And they just shit and git. | ||
| Right. | ||
|
unidentified
|
And... | |
| So yeah, that's it. | ||
| I'm in January. | ||
| I'm going to the Chili Bowl. | ||
| And I'm fucking going to give it hell. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| How fun. | ||
| That sounds like a good time. | ||
| And I said, so is there like a couple warm-up days or practice? | ||
| Yeah, here it is. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| Whoa. | ||
| A dirt track. | ||
|
unidentified
|
There it is. | |
| Oh my God, that is insane. | ||
| So you're just going sideways everywhere. | ||
| Yeah, just drifting. | ||
| The whole thing is like halfway drifting. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right? | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Look at all those people. | ||
| Everyone's going completely sideways around these corners. | ||
| It's hilarious. | ||
| So in January, I told Oklahoma, that's going to be me. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Running it. | ||
| I can't wait. | ||
| It's going to be so fun. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| That looks like a good time. | ||
| And I said, hey man, I want to tell you just because of my ego, right? | ||
| That I'm a good racer, but I don't really know if I am. | ||
| I race go-karts. | ||
| If you want to go down to the local go-kart track, we'll give it hell. | ||
| But have I ever done that? | ||
| Never. | ||
| I'm so excited. | ||
| Are you going to practice? | ||
| I said, is there some warm-up or practice days? | ||
| And they said, no, you can get five laps before the race. | ||
| And I said... | ||
| That's not enough. | ||
| No. | ||
| You need a couple of hours. | ||
| Hours, days, a couple of weeks? | ||
| You need someone to show you, like, where do you, in the apex of the term, when do I jump on the gas? | ||
| So, what... | ||
| So fast forward into January, Cowboys are going to have five laps to fucking get it and then I'm on. | ||
| Is there a place you can go to practice? | ||
| I guess you have to rent a track. | ||
| I was at the Monster thing last night, so I was talking with all the drivers. | ||
| And they were like, no, we don't practice. | ||
| We just race. | ||
| We just race to race. | ||
| There's no practice. | ||
| And I was like, huh? | ||
| You don't what? | ||
| You just race? | ||
| Okay. | ||
| So... | ||
| Can I pick up one of these cars? | ||
| You all got like a loaner I can get in? | ||
| They're like, yeah, we got you, man. | ||
| You show up. | ||
| So Chili Bowl is kind of like, I guess there's 300 injuries over five days and you just fucking get after it. | ||
| Jesus Christ. | ||
| Get away. | ||
| I'm so excited. | ||
| It seems like that would be a skill, though. | ||
| Like, going sideways in the dirt like that? | ||
| You would have to learn how to... | ||
| A skill that I don't have. | ||
| No. | ||
| And they're letting you race with pros. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That seems silly. | ||
| That seems like jumping into... | ||
| Seems like going to Jacksonville. | ||
| Right off the street. | ||
| Slapping on some shin pads. | ||
| That's exactly what the fuck's happening. | ||
| That is so crazy. | ||
|
unidentified
|
So yeah, all you motherfuckers in Tulsa, Oklahoma in January, Chittable Cowboys coming in hot. | |
| Hot! | ||
| So then they tell me I gotta pick a number. | ||
| I don't know what number to pick. | ||
| You gotta pick a number and you pick letters behind the number. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| So I need a good number followed by BMF because I definitely need that. | ||
| Right. | ||
| What would be a good number for you? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| Would it be the year of your first pro fight? | ||
| Would it be the year your grandparents bought you the ranch? | ||
| That's not a bad one. | ||
| It'd have to be Wade. | ||
| What year would that? | ||
| What year is that? | ||
| I think 2011. 11 BMF sounds pretty fucking good. | ||
| 11 BMF. Alright. | ||
| That sounds pretty good. | ||
| 11 BMF. That sounds pretty good. | ||
| Right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| I'm going to send you videos so you'll be able to play it and you'll be like, man. | ||
| That's not a bad one. | ||
| 11 BMF is good. | ||
| 11 BMF. Since it's the ranch, why not have it the birth date of the ranch? | ||
| Yeah, it's accurate. | ||
| You know? | ||
| There it is. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| So, for all you 300 entries, you see 11 on this motherfucker. | ||
| I'm putting you in the wall. | ||
| Coming sideways around that corner with very little control. | ||
| Almost no control. | ||
| And if you think you want to see me down in the pits and come and take your helmet off and get crazy, you're just going down. | ||
| What other shit are you doing that's ridiculous that you probably shouldn't be doing? | ||
| Mounted shooting. | ||
| Mounted shooting? | ||
| On a horse? | ||
| On a horse. | ||
| Do you put earmuffs on the horse? | ||
| Yes, of course. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah, stuff them down in her ears. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| And what kind of rifle are you shooting? | ||
| Colt.45. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Two of them. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Two Colt.45s. | ||
| Oh, so you're two-fisting it? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| So here's the rules. | ||
| You can't have more ammunition than the targets are on the field, right? | ||
| Okay, so there's ten targets. | ||
| Ten targets, so we load five shots into each six-shooter. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Right? | ||
| So there has to be a gun exchange while riding full speed. | ||
| Shooting targets. | ||
| So you shoot one-handed while you hold it on with the other hand. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You never go wide up. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| I'm a right-handed, so I run the reins on my left and I shoot with my right. | ||
| Here it is right here. | ||
| This is it. | ||
| So on-hand is where you shoot on-hand. | ||
| Off-hand is when you put it over your arm. | ||
| So this is off-hand. | ||
| Great. | ||
| This is some cowboys and Indians shit. | ||
| That's it right there. | ||
| Oh, look at this. | ||
| You run around and shoot balloons. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That is hilarious. | ||
| Meanwhile, who are these people in the stands that are letting you shoot near them? | ||
|
unidentified
|
These people have their fucking mind. | |
| You want to talk about people with a death mission? | ||
| Bitch, you're about to catch a bullet. | ||
| It's not live animation. | ||
| You're just shooting blanks. | ||
| Oh, really? | ||
| Yeah, so just the gunpowder is burning the balloons. | ||
| Isn't it crazy that just the blanks can do that much goddamn damage? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's a guy in Hollywood, when I first came here in like 94, who was on a set and he didn't know that. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And he thought it'd be funny to put a blank up to his head and shoot himself in the head. | ||
| Yeah, some people shoot themselves, shoot the horse. | ||
| I mean, you shoot your horse, dude, and he's probably not going to want to do it anymore, is he? | ||
| Yeah, what the fuck, man? | ||
| Yeah, they think that it's just a noise. | ||
| It's not just a noise. | ||
| So learning, learning to get in your horse, training, getting around gunfire and doing it. | ||
| It's fun. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's a good time. | |
| That's like they're practicing for some old school revival. | ||
| Yeah, it's called SAS, Single Action Shooting Society. | ||
| Wild West fights and shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It is. | |
| And during the competitions and during the shows, it's like they take it back and everyone dresses up. | ||
| That's hilarious. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Those are still, to this day, my all-time favorite movies, like The Unforgiven. | ||
| Westerns, come on. | ||
| Westerns are some of the greatest movies ever. | ||
| Ever. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
| I love them. | ||
| I love them today. | ||
| There's something about them. | ||
| It's like, that's a short period of United States history, but that's the period where people were like, fuck it. | ||
| Let's see. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Let's see what goes on over here. | ||
| Let's see. | ||
| Let's cross this divide. | ||
| The weak guy. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| He didn't make it, did he? | ||
| That's one area. | ||
| If there was a time machine, you can go back and see what it was like. | ||
| What if you could only go once? | ||
| And stay there? | ||
| And that was it. | ||
| It was a one-ticket ride. | ||
| I ain't going. | ||
| No? | ||
| No, this is the best time to live ever. | ||
| They would all want to come here. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| Yeah, why the fuck would I go back with no doctors? | ||
| But you would want to go to 3,000. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Meh. | |
| How do you know? | ||
| Could suck a fat dick. | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| Hold on. | ||
| So now you say that, but now how did the guy in 6AD know that 2018 was going to suck a fat dick? | ||
| Well, they would have to know. | ||
| They would have to know. | ||
| Like, we know. | ||
| Like, if we went back to 618, we're like, listen. | ||
| So what? | ||
| You'd go give them a little... | ||
| This is a laptop. | ||
| You opened up. | ||
| We have a thing called YouTube. | ||
| You get on it and you just search. | ||
| And that's where we live. | ||
| So if you want to come there, I'll trade you. | ||
| They would trade in a heartbeat. | ||
| But if you wanted to go to the future where everybody could read everybody's minds and no one had dicks anymore because we all reproduce through genetic engineering. | ||
| Yeah, if I lost that, it'd be over. | ||
| If you lose the dick, it's coming. | ||
| But there's like an orgasm button that's attached to this helmet that you carry around with you because there's no more oxygen on earth. | ||
| And everybody's breathing some new gas that's way better. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| I think right now it's pretty fucking good. | ||
| I'm happy with today. | ||
| I like it. | ||
| So no era you'd go to? | ||
| Nah. | ||
| No. | ||
| If I could come back... | ||
| I'd go to like 1492, I think. | ||
| That'd be a good time. | ||
| See what it'd be like when they landed. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Columbus and I'd be a fucking wicked pirate. | ||
| I think I'd make a good pirate. | ||
| You'd definitely make... | ||
| There are a lot of homos, though. | ||
| Let's just know. | ||
| No homo. | ||
| Nothing wrong with that. | ||
| Pirates are gay. | ||
| A lot of pirates are gay. | ||
| I would be an un-gay pirate. | ||
| The un-gay pirate? | ||
| The un-gay pirate. | ||
| You better sleep with one eye open. | ||
| They'd come at me and I'd say, no, this captain don't play that, homie. | ||
| Your iPads would be this high sleeping. | ||
| Yeah, no. | ||
| No, no, no, no. | ||
| I would bring... | ||
| Yeah, I mean, it makes sense, right? | ||
| With the scarves and the crazy earrings. | ||
| They're all gay. | ||
| Makes sense. | ||
| Spitting at each other. | ||
| That's what they were doing, man. | ||
| That's a fact. | ||
| I'm not making that up. | ||
| Fair enough. | ||
| I think I'd go back to the Mongol days. | ||
| I'd like to see Genghis Khan. | ||
| I'd like to see just what that would look like when they would take over a city and kill a million people. | ||
| And rape and pillage. | ||
| Yeah, insane. | ||
| They didn't have any respect for anybody that didn't live in tents. | ||
| That's how gangster those people are. | ||
| They're like, you live in a house, you fucking bitch? | ||
| They didn't even treat you like you were a person. | ||
| They live in a tent with fire. | ||
| That's all they lived. | ||
| Felt tents everywhere. | ||
| Just took them everywhere. | ||
| Nomadic people. | ||
| So that would be your one stop. | ||
| I would like to see what that was like. | ||
| What if you could go back and then if you died, you'd come back here? | ||
| So that would be a place where you could be pretty sure that you were going to die. | ||
| Would Genghis open arms welcome you into the clan? | ||
| If I came back with an iPhone... | ||
| What would you be... | ||
| Yeah, for sure. | ||
| Or a lighter. | ||
| Dude, I got some shit to show you. | ||
| Lighter. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Zippo. | |
| First of all, I'd have to tell him about Dan Carlin's Wrath of the Con audio series. | ||
| Let's play it for him. | ||
| You'd give him a phone... | ||
| You'd give him a phone, but there'd be no satellite tower, so there'd be no... | ||
| Right, right, right. | ||
| I would have to have some recorded shit already. | ||
| Preloaded on it, yeah. | ||
| Preloaded shit. | ||
| Huh. | ||
| Some videos and movies and stuff. | ||
| And what would you wear? | ||
| Would you come in Genghis Khan gear? | ||
| Or would you show up in like 2018 thermal... | ||
| Optical lens glasses. | ||
| Full riot police. | ||
| If I could bring anything, I would for sure be locked and loaded. | ||
| I want guns strapped to my hips, knives, fucking fully automatic. | ||
| So if you show up with a gun to Ganga Khan, you now become Ganga Khan. | ||
| I shoot him right in the dick immediately to take over. | ||
| All of a sudden, he's not worthy because you have a fully automatic assault rifle. | ||
| Yeah, I climb on the roof and just start jacking. | ||
| Predator style. | ||
| The new sheriff in town. | ||
| Like, for sure. | ||
| And then... | ||
| I'll be reading about Rogan. | ||
| Wasn't that a movie like that? | ||
| Wasn't that Jean-Claude Van Damme? | ||
| Time Cop? | ||
| Uh-huh. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Remember that shit? | ||
| They went back in time and he had a machine gun. | ||
| Someone did. | ||
| They went back in time and fucked people up and stole, like, Civil War gold. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Uh-huh. | |
| Remember that? | ||
| But just like the movies say, I think if you fucked that shit up... | ||
| Yeah, you'd ruin everything. | ||
| You might be in there just mowing people down with a machine gun and then you would just vanish. | ||
| Right, maybe your mom doesn't exist. | ||
| Would you vanish though? | ||
| You'd have to, right? | ||
| Probably. | ||
| Or now that you're in this time, are you no longer in our time? | ||
| Yeah, the timeline changes. | ||
| Because you're there now. | ||
| Look at this. | ||
| See? | ||
| This guy's got fucking machine guns. | ||
| Check this shit out. | ||
| Watch this. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Look at this. | |
| Where are you from, mister? | ||
| I'm from the future, faggot! | ||
| So that would be you. | ||
| Meeting Genghis Khan. | ||
| And would you learn a little bit of his language, you think? | ||
| Or would you just try and go in there with your iPhone and... | ||
| Google Translate? | ||
| Yeah, that would work without the internet. | ||
| I think that the only way you'd be able to communicate with him, you'd have to learn his language. | ||
| For sure. | ||
| Yeah, that would be... | ||
| How hard would it be to learn... | ||
| Do they even know how to say Mongol language anymore? | ||
| I don't think they even understand what the sounds were. | ||
| I think they're just guessing. | ||
| So you'd almost have to go back, grab one, bring them here. | ||
| Yeah, you'd have to have them teach you. | ||
| In-home teach you. | ||
| I don't know if they know how those people talked back then. | ||
| I think there's some real speculation. | ||
| Because you'd be so smart and know so much, but you couldn't communicate. | ||
| Right, yeah. | ||
| It's not like going to Mexico now where we kind of know... | ||
| Oh, Cerveza? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right, right, right. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, I think that's the same with the Mayans. | ||
| And that was only a thousand years ago. | ||
| We don't totally know how they were talking. | ||
| There's a lot of speculation. | ||
| They're still translating a lot of those ancient Mayan ruins and texts on them. | ||
| In Cancun, that's where, like Tulum. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| When I went to Tulum, I went to Chichen Itz, which is three miles. | ||
| I went there once. | ||
| Dude, how the fuck did you take the tour? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| We had a professor take us on a tour. | ||
| It's so amazing, right? | ||
| And they talk about all the rituals and how they drink out of the snow days. | ||
| And then they tell me how they would cut their testicles. | ||
| And I was like, wait, what? | ||
| They're like, yeah, that's how the shaman or the grand mass, whatever, the head religious guy. | ||
| I don't know what the – I'm an idiot when it comes to that. | ||
| But they knew through – they're very smart, right? | ||
| They knew astrology and they knew when eclipses and what were coming. | ||
| So he would wait for the eclipse to come knowing, knowing that three minutes later it's going to just go ahead and pass. | ||
| But all the people that were with him had no idea. | ||
| They didn't know, right? | ||
| They had no idea that it was going to stop. | ||
| They thought they had done something wrong. | ||
| The gods were punishing them with darkness. | ||
| So when the darkness comes, he cuts himself and offers his blood to the gods. | ||
| Sun comes back out. | ||
| Dick blood, huh? | ||
| Dick ball blood. | ||
| Ball blood. | ||
| That's some precious blood. | ||
| Precious blood. | ||
| And at that moment, I was like, so wait a minute. | ||
| You were just tricking these people? | ||
| I've been tricked my whole life. | ||
| I go to fucking church and I've been tricked my entire life like you just tell these people that don't know enough and you knew the real but you told them it wasn't? | ||
| Wait a minute. | ||
| What's going on here? | ||
| I sat back and thought and I was like You probably had to do what you gotta do to control those people back then. | ||
| Goddamn savages. | ||
| Show them. | ||
| Show them a little ball. | ||
| So what about today? | ||
| You're not playing any fucking games. | ||
| Cut my balls. | ||
| Look, I'm controlling the sun. | ||
| Covered it with the moon, bitch. | ||
| And now everyone's like, oh my god, you brought light back. | ||
| Yeah, otherwise. | ||
| You know everything. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You have to. | |
| And you have a machine gun. | ||
| You got a machine gun, too. | ||
| Bitch. | ||
| But I only have 30 rounds, so you couldn't get up there and really, you couldn't really, I mean, unless you came armed up, but how long would those bullets last you? | ||
| Because there's no way you're making a new bullet. | ||
| Yeah, everybody has to see it, too, because they're not going to believe it. | ||
| You're going to have to shoot everybody. | ||
| And if you brought a fucking machine gun back to the Mayans, what do the guns I'm playing with today look like? | ||
| Yeah, no kidding, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You'd fuck shit up. | ||
| Fuck shit up. | ||
| For thousands of years. | ||
| That's the thing about guns, though. | ||
| They get a little better over time, but you can have a gun from 10 years ago, and it's state-of-the-art. | ||
| I believe those guns 10 years ago, 100 years ago, are built better than the shit ones today. | ||
| Than the shit ones, yeah, but they still make real good guns today, too. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| But that's the thing. | ||
| It's weird, the technology of guns is sort of in, like, Like, you don't need it. | ||
| Like, with bows, one of the things about compound bows is a lot of people want to know the new models every year. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because they get better. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| But they don't really... | ||
| Guns don't get that much better. | ||
| Like, a gun from 10 years ago is still a badass gun. | ||
| Well, like, I have a bunch of Henry rifles, right? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
| The Henry rifle from years... | ||
| All-American made from years ago to the same gun. | ||
| They say, no, it's the same gun. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They nailed it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nailed it. | |
| They got it. | ||
| Got it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yes, I wonder how much innovation is, how much room for it. | ||
| Well, until we start doing laser shit, like different, you know, they gotta re-amp. | ||
| You know what drives me crazy about lasers? | ||
| Like Star Wars type shit? | ||
| How come I could see them? | ||
| How come I could see them? | ||
| Because there's clearly fog in the room. | ||
| You didn't see them. | ||
| They're moving too slow. | ||
| With the lightsaber, they hit the thing. | ||
| They're moving so slow. | ||
| Bullets are so much faster than lasers. | ||
| You see them. | ||
| Maybe it's that long of a shot. | ||
| Maybe their bullet is that long. | ||
| I think a... | ||
| Oh, like a flying lightsaber. | ||
| Yeah, like... | ||
| Oh, I never thought about that one. | ||
| You're sending big laser beam. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| Not only does it hit you, but it just keeps going. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I didn't think about it that way. | ||
| Like you're shooting crossbow bolts of lasers. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Of burning hot. | ||
| Is a laser hot? | ||
| It's got to be, right? | ||
| Or is it cold? | ||
| Well, there are cold lasers. | ||
| I had a bulging disc once. | ||
| And I went to this therapist. | ||
| They put cold laser on it. | ||
| I don't know, but I like this idea of flying. | ||
| And then she said, come back three more times this week and we'll get you in. | ||
| They just kept doing it. | ||
| I don't think it really worked. | ||
| But the cold bursts, I think, or the laser bursts, if it was like that, like flying lightsabers, holy shit. | ||
| Yeah, I think the bolts were just huge. | ||
| Until you let off the trigger. | ||
| Still too slow. | ||
| See if you can find a scene from Star Wars 1 where they're shooting at each other. | ||
| Those bitches, it's slower than an arrow. | ||
| They're not moving that fast. | ||
| If you try to watch an arrow coming from a compound bow, it's harder to follow. | ||
| So you couldn't catch it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| No chance. | ||
| No chance. | ||
| No. | ||
| 280 feet a second. | ||
| No chance. | ||
| You ain't catching shit. | ||
| But those bolts from those laser guns look slower than that. | ||
| And you're probably right, you wouldn't, the new laser, you wouldn't, there's no way you'd see it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You wouldn't see shit. | |
| But that's just theatrical for a movie, so you can see it coming. | ||
| But it just makes me feel like they think I'm an asshole. | ||
| So when you take this time travel, so if you could go forward or back, you would go back? | ||
| 100%. | ||
| I would too. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I would too. | ||
| Well, I'm a human. | ||
| I don't think there's a good future for humans. | ||
| I think we're going to be something different. | ||
| So you think if you shoot forward, you might be the only one in there? | ||
| Yeah, there might be no more people. | ||
| Everybody's an android. | ||
| And now you're in a cage getting probed. | ||
| Oh, for sure. | ||
| They're going to test you. | ||
| I can't believe we found one of these. | ||
| What? | ||
|
unidentified
|
They're real. | |
| It's like if they found a Tasmanian tiger or something like that. | ||
| Like, holy fuck, lock it up. | ||
| Lock it. | ||
| Probe it. | ||
| You ever see the video of the last Tasmanian tiger? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Uh-uh. | |
| Jamie, see if you can find a video of the last Tasmanian tiger. | ||
| It died in a zoo. | ||
| I want to say in like 1930. Sad. | ||
| What's interesting is they think they're still alive. | ||
| But Australia is so big. | ||
| Australia is as big as the United States. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| That's a Tasmanian tiger. | ||
| That was the last... | ||
| What, just butt stripes? | ||
| It's a marsupial predator. | ||
| It's the last real mammal predator or marsupial predator that lived in Australia. | ||
| That's what it was like. | ||
| It was like a crazy dog-looking thing. | ||
| But they found... | ||
| Look at the mouth-open picture of it. | ||
| Look at the fucking mouth on that thing. | ||
| That is crazy. | ||
| But there are people that are real reasonable people that believe that there's still a few of those that exist in the wild. | ||
| There's been enough sightings of these things that they think that... | ||
| What is the actual name of that thing? | ||
| It's got a crazy name. | ||
| Thysaline, right? | ||
| How does it spell? | ||
| T-H-Y-C-A-L-I-N-E. Thylacine? | ||
| Whatever it is. | ||
| That would be us. | ||
| Being one of those fucking cages. | ||
| The last person. | ||
| Just wandering around. | ||
| Looking around. | ||
| Stupid. | ||
| All the robots are all probing us. | ||
| So if you could bring one person, would you bring a best friend or would you bring a female counter? | ||
| Gotta bring a chick, bro. | ||
| You got to, right? | ||
| You got to. | ||
| You got to? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Yeah, you got to. | ||
| I'm with you. | ||
| Because you want to bring your friend like, bro! | ||
| Look, I love to hang out with you, but you know how this turns out. | ||
| I don't want to be the last guy in a cave in China without some pussy. | ||
| No. | ||
| That would be, yeah. | ||
| But if I was a pirate, then I guess it would be okay. | ||
| What was the gay cowboy movie? | ||
| What was that movie? | ||
| Brokeback. | ||
| Yeah, we ain't going there. | ||
| No, we ain't going there. | ||
| We are not going there. | ||
| That's a little too intense, bro. | ||
| This fears that shall not be conquered. | ||
| No disrespect to the gay friends out there listening. | ||
| Cheers to you. | ||
| Hey, cheers to you. | ||
| I would definitely go in the past just to see what it was like in ancient Egypt or ancient Rome. | ||
| I mean, I just got back from Italy. | ||
| Right. | ||
| And we were, we checked out Pompeii. | ||
| Of course. | ||
| You know, and you're wandering around where all these people died almost instantly from volcanic ash, 20 feet high. | ||
| And you see other, you saw like they're, right, they chipped away and you can see the... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's one where they found recently where a dude got hit in the head by a flying boulder. | ||
| You just see his skeleton and a giant rock where his head would be. | ||
| It's a way to go. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, you're like, ah, nothing. | ||
| Doom. | ||
| Done. | ||
| Blackness. | ||
| DMT world. | ||
| DMT. Is that where we go, you think? | ||
| Maybe. | ||
| There he is. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Isn't that crazy? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
| Not kind of got him. | ||
| Oh. | ||
| Got him. | ||
| Look at that. | ||
| Look at the article. | ||
| It says, fuck Pompeii. | ||
| But fuck this man in particular. | ||
| Man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Got him. | |
| Whoever wrote that, that's hilarious. | ||
| Anything that was blowing from the mountain? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yep. | |
| Big chunks of rock that got spewed out of this volcano. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The whole thing's crazy. | ||
| Like, when you're wandering around Pompeii and just realizing these people... | ||
| Look, he looks like he's face forward. | ||
| He got hit in the mug. | ||
| Right, like he saw... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Yeah, he got... | ||
| Yeah, it's true. | ||
| I didn't even think of that. | ||
| He wasn't running. | ||
| Oh, look at that one, man. | ||
| That is fucked. | ||
| Is that just volcanic ash mummification? | ||
| Yeah, just preserved volcanic ash. | ||
| Look at his teeth. | ||
| That is insane. | ||
| And it's spooky. | ||
| This guy is coming on my next trip for sure. | ||
|
unidentified
|
He's going to show up. | |
| Yeah, he's going to show up. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Fuck. | ||
| That is the way to go. | ||
| Volcanoes, man. | ||
| Yeah, I have a friend who goes to the Big Island every year for Thanksgiving. | ||
| And I'm like, you going back? | ||
| He's like, fuck yeah. | ||
| I'm like, you're crazy. | ||
| You're going back. | ||
| That thing's on fire. | ||
|
unidentified
|
On fire. | |
| What if it splits in half and sprays out? | ||
| It's taking over. | ||
| Then the gods. | ||
| We made the gods mad. | ||
| Pele. | ||
| Pele's pissed. | ||
| Pissed. | ||
| Well, what area do you think? | ||
| Did you go to the Wild West? | ||
| Where do you think you would go? | ||
| I rounded towards pirates, but then you super whipshot me back. | ||
| So yeah, we'd probably be... | ||
| How about Lewis and Clark? | ||
| If you could go on a Lewis and Clark expedition, how wild would that be? | ||
| Make your way across the unknown. | ||
| No one knew what the fuck was out there. | ||
| No one knew what the fuck. | ||
| Just taking a chance, trying to walk across the United States. | ||
| I mean, that's almost the same era I wanted to go when Columbus was trying to, like, you know what? | ||
| Let's just sail across this flat Earth. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They knew it wasn't flat back then. | ||
| And now we're back to flat. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Some people. | ||
| We discovered it wasn't flat, and now we're back to flat. | ||
| And I have this argument with people, and I said, while doing the pilot school that I'm in, like, you have to keep adjusting for the curvature of the Earth. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| No, no, no. | ||
| It's not real. | ||
| It's not real. | ||
| No, the world's flat as fuck. | ||
| It's flat like that TV. It's just a lack of education. | ||
| It's an interesting thing, too, because it shows you how distracted people are. | ||
| They want to argue about something that's already been figured out. | ||
| And the videos and the literature that people come up with is insane. | ||
| If you Google Fat Earth, by the time it's done, you're like, Goddamn, it might be flat. | ||
| And they're going to put this in a video. | ||
| Cowboy realizes the earth is flat. | ||
| He had a lot of good points there. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Shit! | |
| Yeah, if he's not sitting across from Neil deGrasse Tyson. | ||
| Because if he was, Neil deGrasse Tyson would be like, hold on! | ||
| That's not how it works. | ||
| Hold on. | ||
| That's wrong. | ||
| Hold on. | ||
| This is why we know that's incorrect. | ||
| See, I don't have the... | ||
| Knowledge to be able to check people out. | ||
| But you do know that you have to constantly readjust for the curvature of the earth. | ||
| Yeah, I know that. | ||
| But that's my one fact. | ||
| And then the rest of it, they're like, and then I'm like, huh. | ||
| The crazy one's the water. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| They're like, water doesn't stay on a curve. | ||
| Yes, it does. | ||
| It does. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's gravity. | |
| It's called the oceans. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And if gravity's not real, where the fuck do you think waves come from, bitch? | ||
| Dude, and what do they say? | ||
| There's a glacier all around holding a 700-foot wall. | ||
| There's an ice wall around the outside edge, and then the government protects the ice wall. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why? | |
| Why? | ||
| Why would they? | ||
| Why? | ||
| Okay, this is just me. | ||
| I'm nobody. | ||
| I'm just Joe Blow reading an article. | ||
| Why would NASA and the government spend millions, billions, trillions, right, to protect the fact that it's around Earth when it's flat? | ||
| To me, I would say, oh. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
| We live on a flat earth. | ||
| This is where it gets even stupider. | ||
| Because they think that they're trying to protect us from the truth or shield the truth from us that we live in an incredible special environment. | ||
| We live in the firmament that's protected by a dome. | ||
| The creator is real and that all the elite powers want to keep this information from you. | ||
| A dome. | ||
| It's basically people that don't have an education that are failures that use all their energy misplaced to make these videos that don't make any sense. | ||
| They've figured it out, man. | ||
| They make sense. | ||
| They make sense to me. | ||
| I'm the dummy that watches like, huh? | ||
| Well, it's because anyone making a video where no one's interrupting you, no one's telling you you're incorrect, you're allowed to just continue saying bullshit things over and over and over again, unchecked. | ||
| And so if you listen to this and they use big words and they sound smooth and confident, You know, degrees behind them and charts. | ||
| Yeah, graphs. | ||
| And I'm like, clearly the picture shows ice wall. | ||
| They definitely don't have degrees. | ||
| There ain't nobody with a degree out there that's telling you there's an ice wall. | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| You can get some pretty shoddy degrees lately. | ||
| Well, there was an article recently about schizophrenia, and I think anybody that thinks it's really an ice wall and they have a degree, they should probably go to a doctor. | ||
| They're probably on some sort of medication. | ||
| And something's wrong. | ||
| There's some sort of the levels are off. | ||
| Do you really think there's an ice wall around a plate? | ||
| The earth's shaped like a plate. | ||
| So are they just pumping oxygen in? | ||
| Or our natural habitat creates it? | ||
| Do they believe that? | ||
| That's a good question. | ||
| They don't believe in gravity. | ||
| So I don't know what they believe in. | ||
| And what happens when we send rockets into... | ||
| It hits the dome. | ||
| Those are all fake, bro. | ||
| Rockets are fake. | ||
| Satellites are fake. | ||
| You know what else is fake? | ||
| Dinosaurs. | ||
| No. | ||
| They don't believe in dinosaurs. | ||
| But you want to know what's really funny? | ||
| Will you show me, Jamie? | ||
| Australia's fake, too. | ||
| Australia's fake. | ||
| We just saw the mummy from the volcanic... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Right? | ||
| Is he fake? | ||
| He's real. | ||
| It might be fake. | ||
| I don't even know. | ||
| We just looked at a picture on Google. | ||
| We really didn't investigate that. | ||
| If it's on the internet, it's real. | ||
| The dude who got hit in the head with a rock is real as fuck. | ||
| Real as fuck. | ||
| So, the dinosaur that got hit by a rock, he's fake? | ||
| Could be. | ||
| I wasn't there. | ||
| 65 million years ago is a long time. | ||
| Yeah, especially when the Earth's only 6,000 years old, Joe. | ||
| They have one thing on their side, and this is the one thing on their side. | ||
| This is one of the reasons why they make this argument. | ||
| It's because when dinosaur bones were first discovered, when they were first discovered, there was a whole race to find dinosaur bones, and there was a lot of fuckery. | ||
| There was a bunch of people that were faking things, and... | ||
| Piecing things together that didn't work and hiding bones and saying they found them. | ||
| They were just trying to make a name for themselves. | ||
| But that's just greedy human nature in the face of an actual real discovery that's very valuable. | ||
| That discovery was that they're dinosaurs. | ||
| That there was a gigantic breed of lizards that roamed the Earth millions of years ago. | ||
| Yeah, and so all that's just propaganda? | ||
| So you're saying in Colorado... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| section where they're just doing excavations. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And huge giant feet print in the rock that you can go up and touch a different, probably four or five different species of bad-ass lizards. | ||
| My friend John, he knows a dude who owns a ranch in Montana, and they found a T-Rex on this guy's ranch. | ||
| They pulled a T-Rex out of this guy's ranch. | ||
| They found it in the ground, and they gave him a fuckload of money for it. | ||
| It was like, if they find some sort of discovery like that, that's worth a million dollars. | ||
| It has to be. | ||
| Yeah, it has to be. | ||
| But that's fake? | ||
| He buried that? | ||
| No, it's real as fuck. | ||
| That's what I'm saying. | ||
| They found this one thing that was poking up, and he brought in these archaeologists. | ||
| What would they be? | ||
| Dude, I would sell all but a tooth. | ||
| You're telling me you wouldn't have a T-Rex tooth hanging on a necklace? | ||
| Fuck yeah, I'd keep one tooth. | ||
| One tooth? | ||
| What is a person who searches for dinosaur bones? | ||
| Like, you have a bear tooth hanging? | ||
| I have a fucking T-Rex tooth. | ||
| Is it an archaeologist? | ||
| Right, but I was thinking archaeology being human history. | ||
| No, archaeology is what your wife pays. | ||
| Paleontology? | ||
| That's what they do because they're always digging up old shit. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, that's so true. | |
| Yeah, so true. | ||
|
unidentified
|
They come at you with shit. | |
| Years ago, like, come on. | ||
| Get her a whip. | ||
| Yeah, paleontologist. | ||
| Yeah, so they called in a paleontologist. | ||
| The paleontologist started cleaning off whatever this was. | ||
| And then he's like, holy fuck. | ||
| He's like, this is a goddamn T-Rex. | ||
| Apparently, it's like a lot of it. | ||
| You know, sometimes it's like you only found a couple of bones. | ||
| They found a lot of shit. | ||
| I would like to see that, man. | ||
| If I could go back one of them Jurassic Park hamster wheels. | ||
| So now we're going back. | ||
| I'd like to see that, too. | ||
| Now we're going all the way back. | ||
| Yeah, that's Colorado right there. | ||
| That is fucking insane. | ||
| Insane. | ||
| So, what the fuck? | ||
| That is insane. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Do you know how much time that would take to falsify that? | ||
| Like, they go in there with... | ||
| So you gotta brainwash five people and tell them, what we're gonna do is... | ||
| We're going to go chip this rock out because we've got to fucking fake a bunch of people. | ||
| Have you seen this in person? | ||
| Yeah, I've been there. | ||
| You can crawl all over it. | ||
| You can walk on it? | ||
| You can walk on it? | ||
| Well, see that little gate right there if you back out a little bit? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| See that little gate? | ||
|
unidentified
|
But that's just a little gate. | |
| There it is right there, the little girl standing there. | ||
| That's crazy, man. | ||
| I mean, that's right there in Colorado. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| Right by Red Rocks. | ||
| Yeah, exactly. | ||
| It's right there. | ||
| It's hard to book a gig in Red Rocks, man. | ||
| They're booked up to like 2021, 22. You're going to do a live show? | ||
| I was trying to do a gig in Red Rocks. | ||
| That would be fucking epic. | ||
| I was trying, but I could only get like Tuesday nights. | ||
| Tuesday nights up until like 2022. You know what Tuesday night's better than? | ||
| You know what Tuesday night's better than? | ||
| Never. | ||
| Never. | ||
| No night. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Fucking awesome. | ||
| I'm going to need a couple of tickets for that. | ||
| All right, hook it up. | ||
| We need a couple of tickets. | ||
| So the people don't believe the earth is flat, not round. | ||
| They don't believe in dinosaurs. | ||
| They don't believe in nuclear weapons either. | ||
| Wow. | ||
| That's the other one. | ||
| Nuclear weapons are a hoax. | ||
| Hoax. | ||
| Yeah, only a few people don't believe Australia's a hoax. | ||
| And a lot of people say that's disinformation. | ||
| It discredits the flat earth movement. | ||
| They were saying their planes fly upside down and shit, and that's all upside down. | ||
| Where are the Australians coming from? | ||
| Because Kyle Noakes in Australia right now. | ||
| I could probably call him. | ||
| He's probably a government agent, bro. | ||
| He should be careful. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Shit. | |
| Any phone call you make to him is just going straight to the Illuminati. | ||
| Damn, I'll call Kyle. | ||
| Kyle, are you in Australia? | ||
| Yeah, bro. | ||
| Yeah, you gotta be real careful. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What is he doing? | ||
| Is he retired now? | ||
| He's coming back. | ||
| He's trying to come back. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Well, the problem is he didn't fight his UFC career out when he retired. | ||
| So they still have him under contract? | ||
| Under contract. | ||
| How many more fights? | ||
| Don't know. | ||
| I didn't get into that. | ||
| So he wanted to retire and fight somewhere else? | ||
| I think he just wanted to retire, but now he's got the itch again because the itch comes. | ||
| So he's like, yeah, fuck it. | ||
| I'll come back. | ||
| Do maybe whatever. | ||
| And they're like, no, you come back with us or you don't come back at all. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Contracts. | |
| Legal agreements. | ||
| Hmm. | ||
| Checky world we live in. | ||
| And I figure if he was a government agent, he could sweep that under the rug, right? | ||
| Yeah, but then it'd be too obvious. | ||
| It's part of the cover. | ||
| Part of the cover is you get him locked in the contract, so he becomes one of the regular working men. | ||
| He is a working man. | ||
| And he can say to you, Damn, Stan, they got me. | ||
| Goddamn contract. | ||
| And you're like, you're one of us, Kyle. | ||
| Meanwhile, he's wearing a wire. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Well, damn you, Kyle. | ||
| Is the earth flat, Kyle? | ||
| It's definitely not. | ||
| Is the water... | ||
| Is that how they say it? | ||
| Water? | ||
| World Anti-Doping Agency? | ||
| No, the... | ||
| The Australians say water. | ||
| Oh, the water. | ||
| Water, mate. | ||
| No, that's water. | ||
| The water's upside down, mate. | ||
| Your mom. | ||
| Your mom. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, they're a different breed of human over there. | ||
| They just... | ||
| They evolved for hundreds of years. | ||
| Because they're prisoners. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| We just... | ||
| What a great idea. | ||
| Bring them to the best place on earth. | ||
| And drop them. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| See ya. | ||
| But the stupidest... | ||
| And the prisoners are like, yes! | ||
| Wait. | ||
| I don't have the... | ||
| I'm not getting the death... | ||
| Oh, you just dropped me on a super badass island. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| That's bigger than the one you're on. | ||
| Bigger than the one you're on. | ||
| Way better weather. | ||
| Way better weather. | ||
| Gorgeous. | ||
| And then they dropped all these prisoners off and they started a crazy hierarchy. | ||
| And the ones that didn't really make it just went into the bush. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And they're still there today. | ||
| And then there's the Aborigines who are already there. | ||
| And then on top of that, hot chicks. | ||
| I don't know what they did. | ||
| They grow them hot out there in Australia. | ||
| Something about the prisoner genes. | ||
| The wild prisoner genetics. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| Stop about that wild fucking criminal gene. | ||
| Well, most of the wild criminal genes are the crazy alpha male guys, man. | ||
| The guys that are like the weaker 2018 liberals are saying, whoa, you can't do that. | ||
| Yeah, there's a lot of control going on today. | ||
| You can't do that, so you're going to Australia. | ||
| Yeah, you used the word faggot. | ||
| You used the word faggot. | ||
| Damn. | ||
| That's one of the last words. | ||
| Have I ever told you I got in trouble with the UFC for saying faggot? | ||
| I'm not allowed to say it anymore. | ||
| But you already just did. | ||
| I know. | ||
| We didn't call somebody yet. | ||
| You're just making the noise. | ||
| Yeah, this is like a shell. | ||
| We're in a bubble. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| So it's Vegas. | ||
| I'm drinking all night. | ||
| They had me do this show at 8 a.m. | ||
| on Sunday morning to reflect the fight. | ||
| It was me and CM Punk. | ||
| And I'm reflecting the fight that DC had with Anderson Silva, who I respect, appreciate, great dude. | ||
| I didn't like the way DC fought that fight. | ||
| So when somebody asked me about it, I said, man, he went out there like a fucking faggot and held him, you know. | ||
| He didn't fight to win. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Well, that was completely out of context. | ||
| I didn't mean that. | ||
| I didn't mean he was a homosexual. | ||
| I just say faggot like you're a bitch, like you're a punk. | ||
| So I have to explain myself. | ||
| UFC makes me put on this A rainbow shirt and tell them I apologize. | ||
| They put on a rainbow shirt? | ||
| Rainbow. | ||
| Oh, rainbow. | ||
| They made you put on a rainbow shirt? | ||
| Rainbow shirt to the PR team and apologize. | ||
| That seems homophobic in and of itself. | ||
| I have all the gay activist rights coming after me now. | ||
| They're wanting money. | ||
| How strange is that? | ||
| They want money from me because I offended. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You should donate. | |
| You should donate. | ||
| I did have to donate. | ||
| I did donate. | ||
| So, anyways, I tried to get on and explain myself. | ||
| I said, man, I didn't call him a faggot like a faggot. | ||
| I called him a faggot like a bitch. | ||
| And that backfired big time. | ||
| Yeah, and I mean, that's just how I talk. | ||
| If I called you a punk bitch faggot, that's just what I say. | ||
| I don't mean it. | ||
| In any other way other than that. | ||
| But the thing is... | ||
| Here's the thing, right? | ||
| And I don't mean any... | ||
| Homophobia is bad, right? | ||
| But are words... | ||
| Are words bad? | ||
| Like, if you feel the same way... | ||
| Like, is it a real issue? | ||
| I'm sick beers and I have to pee so bad. | ||
| Go ahead. | ||
| Go ahead, pee. | ||
| You gotta pick your beer consumption up. | ||
| Yeah, I'm three in. | ||
| Sorry, take a break. | ||
| Good luck. | ||
| I think all words are dependent upon the context and your intent. | ||
| Like, what do you mean? | ||
| If you say to someone, like, come on, bitch, and they're your friend, that it's fun. | ||
| But if you say to someone, come on, bitch, and then you hate them, those exact same words are taking on a totally different meaning. | ||
| And that's the same thing with every word, except the N-word. | ||
| The N-word, it's like, it's so toxic. | ||
| You can't even use it joking around, and you definitely can't use it the way you could say almost any other word. | ||
| So, like, I had a bit that I was trying out for a while, but I had abandoned it, where I was like, the N-word's one word that you can't even call yourself. | ||
| Like, you can't even say, God, I'm such an N-word. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Because people get fucking mad at you. | ||
| You can't even say it, but here's the catch. | ||
| If you're a black guy, you could toss that shit around like a beach ball at a concert. | ||
| And it's fine. | ||
| And if you're a black girl, you could use it as well. | ||
| Although a little more sparingly, please. | ||
| Right? | ||
| They can't use it the same amount. | ||
| Black girls tend to use it just a little bit more leniently. | ||
| But they can do whatever they want with that word. | ||
| It's one of the more fascinating words, I think, in human history in terms of its impact, what it means, and how it can ruin your career. | ||
| Didn't that one congressman have to resign because... | ||
| Sasha Baron Cohen had him yelling out the N-word, right? | ||
| What was he? | ||
| It was just because of that, but that probably was on the list of things. | ||
| What did he do? | ||
| Was he a state rep in Georgia, maybe? | ||
| Speaking of the future, what is up with that commode you got in there? | ||
| That thing does everything? | ||
| Yeah, it does everything. | ||
| She eats hot water up your asshole. | ||
| It's warm when you sit down. | ||
| It's wonderful. | ||
| It's heated. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You would fit in great with the Pirates if you said, guys... | ||
| Just trying to be clean, bro. | ||
| Come try my commode out. | ||
| Give you a little hot a shower. | ||
| You're not a homophobic guy. | ||
| No, you're not. | ||
| But it's one of those things where if you say it, I guess if you're a gay person and you hear someone say it, you'd be really upset that they're being homophobic. | ||
| The problem is the word bitch is not good enough in a certain situation. | ||
| And they're trying to get that one, too. | ||
| Remember W. Kamau Bell wouldn't say... | ||
| He says he doesn't say bitch anymore. | ||
| I'm like, alright, dude. | ||
| You're self-censoring. | ||
| We're limiting language. | ||
| I did this podcast with Wolfman. | ||
| I'm serious. | ||
| And he tells me that he... | ||
| And I'm not a homophobic at all. | ||
| It just caught me off guard. | ||
| I didn't know how to take it when he told me that he... | ||
| Experiments. | ||
| He didn't kind of know if he liked boys or girls. | ||
| And I was like... | ||
| Oh, Jason Ellis? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I was like, what? | ||
| You don't know what you like? | ||
| He's like, yeah, I've been to a couple parties, you know, and I just go both ways and we just have groups of people and sometimes it'd be groups of guys and I was just scratching my head and like, huh. | ||
| Okay, I didn't know how to take that. | ||
| If you don't expect it. | ||
| I've known him for years, years, and he dropped this ball on me, and I was like, man, I didn't know how to take it. | ||
| It caught me off guard. | ||
| It was weird. | ||
| He's like, what do you think? | ||
| You think, I like girls, but I also like, or I thought I liked guys. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's weird. | |
| What I wanted to say and what I said were two different things. | ||
| What did you want to say? | ||
| I wanted to say, man, no offense, but man, you put a dick in your mouth and you are a faggot. | ||
| You know what I'm saying? | ||
| So now you're changing the meaning of it again. | ||
| No, I understand that. | ||
| That's what I wanted to say. | ||
| That's what you wanted to say? | ||
| That's what the inner me was wanting to say. | ||
| And I just looked at him like, fuck. | ||
| I didn't, what? | ||
| Like I was just so blown back by it. | ||
| But why is that shocking if people are definitely gay? | ||
| It's not... | ||
| Right? | ||
| It's shocking because you didn't expect it. | ||
| I didn't expect it. | ||
| Right. | ||
| But it's not shocking that someone's gay. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| It's like, there's a lot of gay people. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Nothing wrong with it. | ||
| I don't care at all. | ||
| Nor do I. But when you don't expect someone to be gay, then you're like, whoa. | ||
| Because then you thought that he was like you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Like you and I, we're just a couple of straight guys hanging out. | ||
| But meanwhile... | ||
| Meanwhile, he was not. | ||
| He is... | ||
| The one thing that is odd with me with people that say things like that is that they go, sometimes, sometimes I like guys, sometimes I like girls. | ||
| Like, I couldn't imagine what that would be like. | ||
| Like, you're not sure. | ||
| You're not sure. | ||
| That's what I mean. | ||
| Like, what do you mean you don't know? | ||
| Sometimes you're straight, sometimes you're not. | ||
| Like, Joe, no matter what, every time I go to Baskin-Robbins, I get vanilla. | ||
| Do you? | ||
| That's what I'm going for. | ||
| You don't fuck with strawberry? | ||
| Rocky Road. | ||
| Sometimes I'll dabble in there, but if you brought me back vanilla, you know I'm going to like that. | ||
| It's not like, well, as long as I go there, sometimes I like, yeah, true. | ||
| I mean, there's people that, look, they're just wired different. | ||
| There's nothing wrong with it. | ||
| As long as it's not trying to fuck you. | ||
| But why would that be a problem all of a sudden? | ||
| It would be a problem if you don't want to fuck him. | ||
| True. | ||
| He was coming on to me. | ||
| That makes you realize what it's like to be a girl in the most insignificant ways. | ||
| Because with a girl, it's obviously more dangerous because guys are bigger than you. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sure. | |
| And they can actually hold you down and fuck you. | ||
| But when you're around gay guys, I used to work out at a gay gym when I was doing news radio. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| I worked at Gold's Gym and Cole. | ||
| And I used to describe it. | ||
| I was a tasty little morsel in a big gay stew. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It was the closest gym to the studio. | ||
| It's a great gym, but it was filled with aggressive gay guys that had those scrunchy socks. | ||
| They were in a music video from the 1980s. | ||
| They were flash dance socks. | ||
| These guys like Timberlands and stuff and like super tan and roided up and just hitting on each other left and right with leather vests on. | ||
| I mean, it was crazy. | ||
| It was such a crazy scene. | ||
| And when you go there, you realize that these guys are like leering at you. | ||
| They're not looking at you like, what's up, man? | ||
| How you doing? | ||
| Using the triceps? | ||
| No, it wasn't that. | ||
| They'd be looking at you if you walked into an all-female lesbian super smoke show Gym. | ||
| That's how you'd be looking at all of them. | ||
| Yeah, but I guess. | ||
| What do you mean you guess? | ||
| Because all lesbian gym, they probably look like Tom Arnold. | ||
| In my fantasy that I'm in, they're all like super hot fitness models in there working out. | ||
| If they were legit lesbians, they'd be like, what the fuck are you looking at? | ||
| Then you would be the perpetrator. | ||
| You'd be feeling like the guys look at you and you're like, what the fuck are you looking at? | ||
| Yeah, I mean, the real thing is, I feel like gay and straight people, everybody can get along fine, as long as everyone's on the same page, and as long as They're not trying to fuck you if you don't want it, and you're not trying to fuck them if they don't want it. | ||
| Like, if you're not trying to fuck these lesbians, because you respect the fact they only like girls, that's all great, and the gay guys aren't trying to fuck you. | ||
| But the thing is, you can't tell by looking at someone. | ||
| Can we get mad at the double standard? | ||
| You're saying, hey, these gay guys, they say sometimes. | ||
| What about these girls? | ||
| They're like, well, I sometimes like girls, and sometimes I like guys and girls. | ||
| And then you're listening, they're like, yeah, that sounds like a pretty good idea. | ||
| That does sound like a good idea, and I think we should shut the fuck up about that. | ||
| Otherwise, they're going to get insecure. | ||
| They're going to stop that practice. | ||
| Let them keep going. | ||
| Have a good time. | ||
| But all of a sudden, I'm like, guys, I'm like, girls, hey, Joe, you want to come on the guide trip? | ||
| Exactly. | ||
| We're hypocrites. | ||
| No, I don't. | ||
| We're hypocrites. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But there's something about guys, for straight guys, the idea of a guy fucking you or making you suck his dick is the most horrific thing. | ||
| It'd be right next to the cave diving experience for me. | ||
| The nightmares would be, but I have no, zero ill will towards them, and I don't have any problem with them in any way in society, in any way, shape, or form. | ||
| I'm not even remotely homophobic. | ||
| I like gay people. | ||
| Sure. | ||
| But there's a reality that gay dudes are dudes. | ||
| And dudes are kind of gross. | ||
| And they will try to fuck you. | ||
| And that's the one thing. | ||
| I had a friend of mine who was a wardrobe guy and he was a gay guy. | ||
| And he was always telling me about these straight dudes that he would lure them in and turn them and get them to suck his dick. | ||
| He's hilarious. | ||
| My wrestling coach tells stories about that about college. | ||
| How the gay guys would fuck the football players. | ||
| And I'm like, wait, the big bad football college guys are getting... | ||
| What? | ||
| Yeah, and same thing. | ||
| Yeah, that's... | ||
| There's... | ||
| They love it. | ||
| They love to turn this... | ||
| Just like a guy would love to turn a lesbian. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Love. | |
| That would be a mission, wouldn't it? | ||
| Yeah, I used to have a joke about that. | ||
| That guys believe in gay guys. | ||
| Like, I believe in gay guys. | ||
| But I don't really believe in lesbians. | ||
| I think they think they're lesbians, but that's just because they ain't got a hold of this sweet dick that they ain't got me. | ||
| That's how every guy looks at a lesbian. | ||
| Like, yeah, yeah, I know she thinks she's a lesbian. | ||
| Let me fuck her a couple times and be nice to her. | ||
| We're like, I can eat pussy way better than another girl, I feel. | ||
| They don't know what they're doing now, the kind of endurance. | ||
| Jeez. | ||
| There's no way. | ||
| And I brought the dick. | ||
|
unidentified
|
You know what I'm saying? | |
| Not only did I eat your pussy. | ||
| And I brought the dick. | ||
| And I brought the dick. | ||
| Yeah, so men don't necessarily totally believe in lesbians. | ||
| But they 100% believe in gay dudes. | ||
| Then why don't butch girls act more like super... | ||
| I mean, they do. | ||
| They cut their hair and they work. | ||
| Some of them do. | ||
| But the gay guys all got the snap and the priss. | ||
| No, they don't, though. | ||
| There's some fucking beefy bodybuilder gay dudes that look like straight guys. | ||
| You can't tell. | ||
| Until they slap your ass in the gym until you get set. | ||
| And then you're like, whoa. | ||
|
unidentified
|
No, I don't need a spot, kind sir. | |
| You stop right there. | ||
| It should be a way to tell. | ||
| They have different markings. | ||
| Oh, shit. | ||
| Different kinds of birds. | ||
| Like, oh, that's a female. | ||
| It's a female bird. | ||
| See those extra feathers? | ||
| But what if it's a transgender now? | ||
| Oh, now you don't know what. | ||
| What if it's wearing female feathers, but... | ||
| That's an odd one, right? | ||
| Because that's one that, like, we didn't think about weird kids. | ||
| And now you have children, so how do you feel about if your little girl has to go to the bathroom, but there's a guy-girl in there? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well... | |
| Like, what draws the line? | ||
| I would hope... | ||
| Either way, like if your son is going to the bathroom and there's some pedophile child molester that preys on boys and he has to be a guy and he's in that bathroom, it has nothing to do with your sexual orientation. | ||
| It has to do with you being a predator and a piece of shit. | ||
| But that could happen for straight people just as easily as it happened for gay people, just as easily as it happened for trans people. | ||
| It's someone who's willing to prey on smaller people that are vulnerable. | ||
| I wasn't But you know what I'm saying? | ||
| There's a lot of trans people that would be more than happy to be really friendly to your daughter and use the girls' room and it wouldn't be an issue at all. | ||
| She pulls out a wiener and pees. | ||
| That could be an issue. | ||
| And your daughter's like... | ||
| What in the hell? | ||
| Dad... | ||
| Right. | ||
| But what if you had a girl who became a transgender girl, and she has big tits, but she wanted to keep her dick? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And where'd she go? | ||
| She's wearing a skirt, high heels right now, today. | ||
| Where'd she go? | ||
| Which bathroom shoes? | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| I want to say she's got the equipment. | ||
| Right. | ||
| She's got the equipment. | ||
| Full equipment. | ||
| Full equipment. | ||
| For the male. | ||
| But she has tits. | ||
| Here's a perfect example. | ||
| Go to Bailey J's Twitter page. | ||
| I'm just saying, I think that would worry. | ||
| She feels like a woman, but she was born a man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But she's got a dick. | |
| Yeah, but she has a dick. | ||
| Bailey J's my favorite example. | ||
| I hope she doesn't mind me using her. | ||
| Because she's a transgender girl that is as much a girl as you could possibly get while still having a dick. | ||
| Like, see? | ||
| Look at that tit. | ||
| That confused the fuck out of you, right? | ||
| You're like, hey, what's going on here? | ||
| Now go to the media, her media page. | ||
| Did they kill her? | ||
| No, she's alive. | ||
| Did they kill her? | ||
| No, no, no. | ||
| I mean, she pulls her dick out. | ||
| This is the thing. | ||
| Like, she's got a giant dick. | ||
| So she's got these big tits and then, hey, there you go. | ||
| Oh, man. | ||
| Yeah, so where is she peeing? | ||
| You know, I'm cool with her going to the girls' room. | ||
| And what... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I mean, just... | ||
| She's gonna probably squat. | ||
| It's not like she's gonna stand there with her pants down, just hosing the wall, letting everybody know. | ||
| So, do you feel... | ||
| I mean, if she went into the men's room, that would cause more of a conflict? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Could you imagine? | ||
| Could you imagine something like that? | ||
| So, for her safety, you're saying, let her go into the female... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Not just for her safety, but just like who she identifies with. | ||
| Look, it's a weird thing, right? | ||
| It's so weird. | ||
| Because a trans person is... | ||
| Do you go into the family room? | ||
| Do you go into the family bathroom in between? | ||
| That's probably the... | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's the safe bet. | ||
| It's ironic. | ||
| She's anti... | ||
| She's not going to make a family with what there's going on. | ||
| That's so confusing. | ||
| That is so confusing. | ||
| How does that happen? | ||
| She's not going to get pregnant. | ||
| Not yet, but maybe in our microwave machines, you can also have a baby. | ||
| Change your gender. | ||
| That would be a way where transgender people would probably be the most happy, where they didn't have to hormonally become a woman through surgery, but instead, they just actually turn you into a woman. | ||
| Bam! | ||
| Microwave you. | ||
| Done. | ||
| Oh, you want to be a girl? | ||
| Bing. | ||
| And maybe go back. | ||
| Well, if that's the case. | ||
| Yeah, if you could go there and back, where do I sign up? | ||
| Yeah, and back. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because I'm going. | ||
| I'm going to go check this out. | ||
| See what it's like for a couple of days. | ||
| Yeah, a week. | ||
| Go to Vegas. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Let a couple dudes bang you. | ||
| Now that's another weird. | ||
| Now it's weird. | ||
| Now it's weird again. | ||
| Because you still have that memory when you back. | ||
| Yeah, you're like, hey, I can't erase this. | ||
| I can't even tell my friends. | ||
| Like, dude, I went to Vegas. | ||
| It's always in the back of your throat. | ||
| Yeah, so that would have to be a don't ever. | ||
| Giant issue. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yuck. | |
| So yeah, you say you would try it, but then you have to have the memory of trying it. | ||
| Yeah, you'd have to have the memory. | ||
| But you could maybe pass that you were a girl. | ||
| Maybe, but what if a guy's trying to fuck you? | ||
| He'd be like, hey, no, dude. | ||
| No. | ||
| No. | ||
| But he's like, but you're a girl. | ||
| Would you go random, or would you think you'd do a friend of yours that you'd... | ||
| Like, would you give Eddie Bravo a call, like, Eddie, I heard some shit. | ||
| Let's go. | ||
| Not only would I do a random, I would wear a mask, like, fucking eyes wide shut. | ||
| I'd be like, that's the way to go. | ||
| No, no, because you as a girl, you wouldn't look like you as a girl. | ||
| Right. | ||
| I'd be like, hotter. | ||
| Hotter. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Way attractive. | ||
| I'd have curly hair. | ||
| Yeah, because goddamn, imagine if you zapped over to the female and you were just... | ||
| Right. | ||
| Precious. | ||
| Precious. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| They're like, oh, you want this? | ||
| Here you go. | ||
| That would be a problem. | ||
| That would be a real problem. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Fuck yeah. | ||
| So they made you wear a rainbow shirt. | ||
| Yeah, a rainbow shirt. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Isn't that funny? | |
| They sold it. | ||
| I had a bit about that, too, about how gay people took over the rainbow. | ||
| I'm like, it's theirs. | ||
| The rainbow used to be in leprechauns. | ||
| Pots of gold. | ||
| Nope, not anymore. | ||
| Not anymore. | ||
| They took that shit over. | ||
| They own it. | ||
| I don't fully understand. | ||
| I'm sure someone will comment on your YouTube page here and tell you why. | ||
| They just took it over. | ||
| Why the rainbow? | ||
| Well, it's just beautiful. | ||
| Everybody can fit along. | ||
| It's beautiful colors. | ||
| They're flamboyant. | ||
| They like a lot of colors. | ||
| Put all those colors together, like, yay! | ||
| Everyone's getting along. | ||
| But are all of them flamboyant? | ||
| No. | ||
| Can you say all? | ||
| No, there's bears. | ||
| Right, there has to be. | ||
| There's bears, yeah. | ||
| Because... | ||
| Some of the guys still like to do hunt. | ||
| Guy shit. | ||
| Guy shit. | ||
| Butt fuck. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Fine. | ||
| Nothing wrong with that. | ||
| But the words is what kills them. | ||
| Yeah, an F word. | ||
| Don't say it. | ||
| Donald Cerrone. | ||
| Donald Cerrone, please make a donation here. | ||
| It's one of those words that, as growing up as kids, it didn't really mean a gay person. | ||
| Like, Louis C.K. had a whole bit about it. | ||
| That it didn't mean... | ||
| You didn't... | ||
| But we're supposed to evolve our vocabulary. | ||
| Yeah, you might call you a faggot. | ||
| That's the idea. | ||
| I don't mean it like that. | ||
| I just mean... | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| You don't mean this is a gay person. | ||
| You might call you a bitch. | ||
| I don't mean you're a female dog. | ||
| I just mean you're... | ||
| It's just... | ||
| Right. | ||
| It's the same word. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right. | |
| It's just like, bitch is like level one... | ||
| But faggot is like the gold level. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's like, listen, we're not playing around. | ||
| You said it. | ||
| You. | ||
| Right? | ||
| It's like cunt. | ||
| If I call a girl at the gas didn't hear like, you fucking cunt. | ||
| Bro, that's... | ||
| I went there. | ||
| I went to the end. | ||
| Defcon 5. Yeah. | ||
| But if we're in London or we're in the Nomads Land Australia and they just say, oh, you fucking cheeky cunt. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You know? | ||
| They think it's funny. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Cunt, cunt, cunt. | |
| Yeah. | ||
| It's the word they use. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So I guess because they use it all. | ||
| I mean, I don't know. | ||
| Just words are words. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Words are words. | ||
| But it's – if they're ineffective – But they hurt so bad. | ||
| Yeah, some of them do. | ||
| You can kill. | ||
| Especially if there's some reality to it. | ||
| That's the thing. | ||
| I promise today we're going to get some good ones. | ||
| There's going to be some... | ||
| Yeah, but you can't read those. | ||
| I'm going to read them. | ||
| Why waste your time? | ||
| You're such a big... | ||
| You're living your life. | ||
| You're this big character. | ||
| Why pay tribute to these text messages? | ||
| I love living the life. | ||
| I wish more people would get out there and live life, Joe. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I get so much shit for that. | ||
| Like, I can't believe you're not training. | ||
| You're out living. | ||
| And I said, man, I look at my life like I'm retired right now. | ||
| Like, why do I want to do all this cool shit when I'm 50? | ||
| And I can't. | ||
| I can do it now. | ||
| Right. | ||
| In my prime. | ||
| Well, also, when people are young, they do whatever they want to do. | ||
| And then it's like, when you get older, you're supposed to become more serious. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Sure. | |
| I remember when you decided to try to be more serious for a while. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it fucked you up. | ||
| Fucked me up. | ||
| It wasn't the way to go. | ||
| It limited your expression. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That's a good way to throw it in. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Because I love doing all this wild, living life. | ||
| It's part of who you are is having fun. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's like if I got here and you're like, cowboy, change the plans. | ||
| We're not doing the podcast. | ||
| We're going to skydive. | ||
| And I'd be like, are you speaking to my heart? | ||
| We're going to do a podcast from skydiving. | ||
| From skydiving. | ||
| So tell me about Winkle John. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| What happened with Mike Perry? | ||
| He sucks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Why did they make you wear a rainbow shirt? | |
| Why a rainbow? | ||
| What does it say on it? | ||
| It would have 30 seconds. | ||
| It would be a very short podcast. | ||
| Well, the UFC has to do damage control on savages, which is hilarious. | ||
| They have a bunch of people like you and Mike Perry and, you know, fill in the blank. | ||
| All these savages running around saying crazy shit. | ||
|
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|
You go, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. | |
| Whoa. | ||
| Do you ever go to Derek Lewis's Instagram page? | ||
| Yeah, I love it. | ||
| Best goddamn Instagram page online. | ||
| I love it. | ||
| Where does he get the videos? | ||
| I don't know, man. | ||
| He's got all of them. | ||
| All of them. | ||
| What is it? | ||
| Is it The Beast MMA? Yeah. | ||
| What is his... | ||
| Plugin. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Beast UFC. Derek Lewis. | ||
| Shout out to Derek. | ||
| Derek Lewis is fighting Volcon. | ||
| He's fighting that giant Russian dude. | ||
| Tell him, Derek, let's not do the same. | ||
| I know your back was hurt. | ||
| I know your back was hurt the last fight, but let's... | ||
| That was the craziest fight I've ever seen in my life. | ||
| Let's throw more than five punches this fight. | ||
| It's almost like he was waiting. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Alexander Volkov. | ||
| The Beast UFC. He's got the most hilarious Instagram page. | ||
| And anytime there's anything fucked up that there's a video, it's on his. | ||
| It's on his. | ||
| He's on it all day. | ||
| That is so bad. | ||
| You see the guy's shit. | ||
| He just shits. | ||
| Watch. | ||
| And darts. | ||
| It's just so crazy that he puts all these in there. | ||
| Where do you get that? | ||
| He gets all of them. | ||
| There's one that he has like real recently within the last couple weeks of this guy standing on the side of the highway. | ||
| What is the girl with the boobs? | ||
| Yeah, sure. | ||
| Click on that. | ||
| What's happening here? | ||
| Somehow or another, the nipples aren't showing. | ||
| That's amazing. | ||
| Maybe they're a little higher. | ||
| Incredible control. | ||
| Those nipples are in the wrong place. | ||
| The nipples are supposed to be below those. | ||
| There should be some areola hanging out. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| She's got no areola. | ||
| She's an alien. | ||
| That's barely a person. | ||
| Do you think aliens have beautiful girls or are they beautiful alien girls? | ||
| I think they gave up on pussy. | ||
| This is what I think. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Stop it. | |
| What is this guy kissing this guy for? | ||
| Stop it. | ||
| If you think your life is bad, these are Siamese brother. | ||
| One is gay and they just got one ass. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Oh my god. | ||
| Did you hear what that just said? | ||
| Is that real? | ||
| If you think your life is bad, one is gay and they have one ass. | ||
| Oh man. | ||
| This guy's kissing one of them. | ||
| That's the... | ||
| Is that real? | ||
| That's the gentle part. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| The kissing. | ||
| I don't even want to know if that's real. | ||
| The he has one ass part is what clears into the arrest. | ||
| Scroll down if you can see the accident. | ||
| There's a highway video. | ||
| So this is fake. | ||
| Yeah, right there. | ||
| The jumping from outer space is... | ||
| Oh, no, that's not it. | ||
| I haven't seen that one. | ||
| I haven't seen the jumping from outer space one. | ||
| But there's one where a guy is standing on the side of the highway right next to a black SUV and someone plows into the SUV at full blast and someone else flies out of the back of the SUV, flies into the air, lands on their feet and starts walking. | ||
| Come on. | ||
| It's fucking crazy. | ||
| He pulls so many. | ||
| This is crazy. | ||
| How far back was it? | ||
|
unidentified
|
No. | |
| Did they pull it? | ||
| Where's he at with the rattlesnake? | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| What's the date of that? | ||
| What is the rattlesnake one happening? | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| He probably got it pulled. | ||
| His shit gets pulled. | ||
| Does it get pulled? | ||
| I guess. | ||
| People find out about it. | ||
| What do you mean you haven't seen the outer space jump? | ||
| I haven't seen it. | ||
| That ain't it. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Whoa! | |
| He crashes. | ||
| Has to crash. | ||
| Someone does. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah, I love pushing the little... | |
| A little glass button on the Instagram watching all the crazy videos. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Get on a tangent and go. | ||
| There's so many now. | ||
| It's like so much fucked up there. | ||
| Is this one? | ||
| No, this isn't the same one. | ||
| He's got so many of these, man. | ||
| Oh, Jesus. | ||
| What is this, a high-speed chase? | ||
| Oh, Jesus. | ||
| I'm going to wait for it. | ||
| Oh, boy. | ||
| I'm waiting for it. | ||
| It's probably one of those videos that loop. | ||
| Oh, here it is. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Right here. | |
| Boom! | ||
| Ba-boom! | ||
| Tree. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Boom! | |
| Oh, Jesus. | ||
| That one wasn't as good. | ||
| Yeah, the one where the guy flies out naked and starts walking on the highway is amazing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God. | |
| Maybe that's it. | ||
| Hold on. | ||
| Go back right there. | ||
| What is that one that looks like a bear standing up? | ||
| How would that one be it? | ||
| Is it a cat? | ||
| No, hold on. | ||
| Go back to it real quick. | ||
| That's a cat in a Roomba? | ||
| Oh, okay. | ||
| Imagine being as smooth as this cat. | ||
| Watch this. | ||
| The Roomba comes near him, touches him. | ||
| It's like, nah, bitch. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. | |
| He's just used to the Roomba. | ||
| That's all that is. | ||
| Oh, yeah. | ||
| That's what it is. | ||
| Bitch. | ||
| Out. | ||
| Turn. | ||
| She better give the pussy for that. | ||
| Better, right? | ||
| They're ready to fight. | ||
| That looks like two cats. | ||
| The cat fight? | ||
| Jesus. | ||
| Cowboy, it's already 3.30. | ||
| What does that mean? | ||
| Time flew by. | ||
|
unidentified
|
God. | |
| We just did three hours. | ||
| Welcome, motherfuckers. | ||
| That was awesome. | ||
| Yeah, hopefully they... | ||
| Hopefully people don't get mad at you for your use of... | ||
| The F word. | ||
| The equal use. | ||
| Equal use. | ||
| We shared that. | ||
| I used it only in reference to Time Cop. | ||
|
unidentified
|
It's one of those things, man. | |
| We're limiting expression in strange ways today. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Half of it is as much about people getting mad at you and wanting to be able to censor you or to get control of you or to be angry at you or to shut you down or get you fired or get you to put that rainbow shirt on. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| It's like half of it. | ||
| Hmm. | ||
| Well... | ||
| What are you going to do? | ||
| What are you going to do? | ||
| We're going to wait two years and we're going to get more stories when we come back. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So this Mike Perry fight is when? | ||
| November? | ||
| 10th. | ||
| November 10th. | ||
| That's in Denver too, right? | ||
| Denver, Colorado. | ||
| Why don't I hear some crazy rumors about you thinking about moving back to Denver? | ||
| No, I'm just moving my family up there. | ||
| There's nothing really left for them in New Mexico. | ||
| I'm not there with Jackson. | ||
| I'm buying a house in Denver and move. | ||
| Oh, you are going to buy a house in Denver? | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| I'll move the wife and the kid up there and have them just fly back to the ranch and train. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| BMF Ranch ain't going nowhere. | ||
| It's stuck. | ||
| Unless the cult leader wants to hit me up, buy it! | ||
| Other than that, no, it's just there. | ||
| But do you rather live in Denver? | ||
| I love it, yeah. | ||
| If I had my roots not been set, I'd have just gotten blindsided. | ||
| No, Denver's amazing. | ||
| It's one of the best mixes of country, city, beautiful scenery, but it has everything. | ||
| My mom, my grandma, they're all there. | ||
| The people are very cool. | ||
| It's a very cool city. | ||
| One of my all-time favorite places to go. | ||
| I agree. | ||
| It's one of my favorite places to go. | ||
| Alright, shout out to all the gay people. | ||
| Hope nobody was offended. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Hey! | |
| Shout out to everybody else, bisexuals, trans people with big dicks. | ||
| Feel free to use that bathroom. | ||
| Just leave those kids alone. | ||
| Shout out to everybody out there just trying to be a good person. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yes. | |
| Shout out to everybody distributing that plant medicine. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| The earth grown. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Shout out to Paul Stamets. | ||
| That's it. | ||
| Dennis McKenna. | ||
| All you people. | ||
| Shout out to Young Jamie. | ||
| Hey. | ||
| How about that? | ||
| All right. | ||
| Well, listen, brother. | ||
| I'm glad we did this, man. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
| Absolutely. | ||
| Love you. | ||
| Love you too, man. | ||
| Donald Cowboy Cerrone, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
| We'll be back soon. |
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