Louis C.K. debates Joe Rogan on border policy, arguing open borders invite chaos akin to The Purge while using racial slurs and comparing immigrants to zombies. He claims feeling safe is unnatural, defends his privileged safety against those facing danger abroad, and critiques Columbus's impact on Native Americans. Ultimately, the exchange highlights deep ideological divides regarding immigration, safety, and privilege, exposing how comedy can amplify controversial political rhetoric without addressing systemic inequalities. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Borders Are Not Fair00:12:05
Yeah, got a new show for y'all.
Got a damn good show.
That right there is the great Louis C.K. He's a he's a political philosopher now.
Yeah, man, he's talking politics.
He went on to Joe Rogan experience and had a philosophical political conversation with Joe.
It is talking about the border and Mexicans.
Illegals.
Yeah, well, listen what Louis.
I wouldn't mind keep having a bunch of people come in here, but they got to be Cuban.
Them some damn patriots.
They know what's up.
Yeah.
All right, listen to what Louis has to say.
I think that the most, I don't know, there's a form of life.
It's a weird thing because you're not supposed to be happy and you're not supposed to be safe.
What?
I think that that's the problem is that people expect that and it's not a good way to...
You're not happy when you're safe.
You're not happy when you're happy, when you're secure.
What?
Sound kind of crazy.
You know, like people, I was listening to something about the border.
You know, these people just trying to come into America.
And some people are like, well, if we let just a few in, it's a mess.
Like there's no good answer, you know?
What if we just let the ones in who are really upset?
What?
Yeah.
But we can't let them all in.
Like when liberals try to say it's like the dumbest position they get into, it's like, well, we can't.
No, we can't let them in here.
Got to keep them out.
But we really like them.
And it's great that they're brown and sorry.
But, you know, there's like an impossible.
And then the right takes over and they sound racist.
And then the left takes over.
They just sound stupid.
But my feeling is they should open it, the border.
And let everybody pour in.
And then the answer, which is, well, then there will be all these problems.
Yes, there should be.
It shouldn't be so great here.
You should want to feel safe.
Yeah, it's a horrible thing to feel safe and have a good life and feel safe around your kids, have shelter, food, medicines, doctors.
You shouldn't have those things because other people don't have as much.
Well, look here.
Like, that's a crazy ass argument you just made.
Yeah, since the beginning of time, civilization.
Man, when he was just like a caveman, he was sitting in a cave.
He was cold.
It was wet.
He had no shoes.
Damn saber tooth outside waiting for his ass to come out and devour his ass.
So man came and said, you know what?
We got to create weapons, guns.
You know, I think the saber tooth was already dead, won it.
This is an analogy.
You should have said Neanderthals, them dumb knuckle dryers around.
I'm just saying, we want to live, we want to feel safe.
Yeah.
We don't want to like be in Africa and a damn leopard drag somebody's wife off and eat them up in the damn tree.
We don't want to live like that anymore.
That's a common occurrence in India.
We're out there looking at, you know, the dancing shit.
Tiger come out.
Drag your ass, drag up a tree, eat you.
Yeah, we want to feel safe.
That's why.
But that's why borders are so important, Louis C.K. That's why they're so important.
Because borders separate good ideas from the bad ideas.
Oh, man, that was so good.
That's why everybody wants to come here.
Yeah.
Because we got all the great ideas.
Oh, let's come with this medicine.
Let's come with this shotgun so this damn, sis damn mountain won't come in and eat my kids right in front of me.
These people on any...
Oh, somebody break in my house and try to rob me.
Yeah, these other countries, they have the exact same opportunities they do here.
It's just that their government, their country, they make very bad shit, bad decisions.
They're not free.
Like I just said, this is why this country is so great.
We're free.
Yeah.
We're privileged.
But that does not mean that we should feel bad about that.
That doesn't mean we should open our doors and just let people pour on that country.
That's crazy.
Yeah, a lot of people have died so we can.
You would literally turn the United States of America into that movie, The Purge.
Walking down the street, la la la la.
Some illegal Mexican come up and just stabs you.
Well, not all of them would do that.
I'm not saying that just, you know, hypothetical.
I'm not saying all Mexicans are horrible people.
But some of them, some of them are crazy.
Some of them are criminals.
Some of them are, you know.
It could have been a Cuban.
It could have been a Russian.
Could have been a Ukrainian.
It could have been anybody.
Just not Mexican.
I'm just saying, I'm not racist, what I'm trying to say.
An illegal, let's put it this way.
An illegal immigrant comes up and stabs Keith in the neck and grabs his wallet.
Or an African come up, throw a spear right through your throat.
All right, let's go to the second spear checker, huh?
Yeah.
It shouldn't be so great here, is what I'm saying in America.
It shouldn't be.
It's a weird thing to sequester a certain group of people and try to keep upping their lifespan and their lifestyle and just keep trying to increase that for this group of people.
And then everyone's, and then this pressure of people trying to come in so they can enjoy it.
There's something wrong with that.
That's not a system that's working and it forces people to do cruel things to other people.
There's a lot of people that die so Americans can be safe.
They're just dying, you know, weddings that are drone bombed in Yemen because a guy said something that might have resulted in American insecurity.
Not even like definite American deaths, but like just so we can breathe a little easier.
Folks die and folks do labor in unsafe places so that we can keep the prices where we like them.
There's so much about American life that other people pay for.
That's part of it.
But also it's not good for us either.
It's not a good way to live in a gated community.
You know, if you let folks pour in like any other wave, it'll kind of slosh.
And then you'll just, things will be different.
I don't know, like, what'll really happen?
A bunch of people, like, will they just come with knives and start killing everybody?
I don't think so.
I don't know what'll happen, but it's just weird to me.
I mean, I lived in Mexico when I was a kid.
My dad's Mexican.
And I remember my first cogent thoughts were in Mexico, and then I came to America.
I mean, it was Mexico City.
It was beautiful.
It was a city before America had anything.
It's this very old European kind of place, you know, Mexico.
It's beautiful country and it's got a lot more depth to it than anybody knows here.
And we're not really sharing with them because they're kind of like the other guys because we're afraid of how many of them are dying to come here to work for us for very little.
Like this thing.
I don't know.
I don't know.
This is shit I don't know about.
But the feeling I get is that the more this American security, this feeling of like, you know, there's more oxygen in the air.
It's more.
It's not good in the end for everybody.
It's good for us.
What the hell?
What?
Well, it's not good for everybody.
It don't supposed to be.
Yeah.
I mean, if their country's going to make it great for their citizens, they have the opportunity to do that, but they don't give a shit.
They care about power, money.
It's not good for everybody here in the United States.
Yeah.
I mean, you know, life is not fair.
It's not a Dr. Seuss book.
Life will never be perfect, Mr. Louis C.K. You make it sound like Mexico is so great.
Won't you go back where you came from?
Yeah.
My wife's from Mexico City.
She got the hell out of there.
I don't know what the hell you're talking about.
It's this beautiful place.
I had a son that had to go there and do some for the government.
He's a contractor.
And in certain places, he couldn't even go in Mexico City because he's an American citizen because of the drug cartels.
Mexico, I'm sure there's some good areas, but I mean, if Mexico is so great, why don't you go back where you came from?
I think his dad was Mexican.
He doesn't look Mexican.
Looks like a damn colonizer to me.
Well, the minorities, people that look like him.
Uh-huh.
White, but they could be.
He's definitely Caucasian.
I don't care if he's Mexican.
He's a Caucasian.
You could be Caucasian from Mexico.
That's Mexican.
Well, you could be Caucasian.
That's why he got a soft heart from Mexico.
Yeah, you're biased.
You let your personal feelings influence your train of thought.
Yeah, see, I'm Africa.
I got my ancestors from Africa.
I don't give a shit about Africa.
I'm an American.
You need to let that shit go.
What the hell is wrong with you?
Yeah, man.
You said things would be different.
Different how?
People will die if you do that.
I mean, in this, like, if we was to let people in our borders, these things wouldn't affect you as much as they would the typical everyday person.
Yeah.
It's easy for you to sit on the Joe Rogan experience.
Yeah, because you're living in a damn probably a gay community.
Yeah.
Joe, he's loaded.
He's rich.
Both of you guys are rich.
Not like Joe.
Joe rich and got like 100 million just to do this shit on Spotify.
Yeah, that's, you got a big heart, but that big heart can get a lot of people killed.
Well, see, this is.
Like, you'll be like, if it, remember that show, The Walking Dead?
Anybody with a big heart, they got killed first.
We gotta help them.
No, But fuck them.
I'm going this way.
And then you go out there and help him, and then he fall down.
And then his damn sign of colour.
You look like it's, oh, shitty got him.
You need to go look at that old series, The Walking Dead.
Maybe you can get a dose of reality.
Now, I'm not calling illegal immigrants zombies.
I know how you liberals like to take things out of context.
That was just a hypothetical argument.
It was a joke.
But that's crazy.
If you was to open their boards, how many people would enter America in just a couple of hours?
And they can't speak the language.
They got no skills.
No resources.
Oh, the government's going to take care of them.
You think that's a good idea?
And what they give them is going to be barely enough to live.
So they're going to be walking down the street.
I'm going to come put up in my nice brand new Chevrolet truck.
And they're going to be like, well, for spirit.
Be African-experienced people, Mexicans shooting and killing people.
I mean, that's just, that's not racist for me to say that.
It's just, that's just reality.
Yeah, I mean, it's going to be white people doing crazy shit.
I know it's going to be some crazy ass Russians in here.
Some crazy ass Ukrainians.
Don't let a bunch of, what's those people from Australia?
Them Aborigines?
Don't let them Aborigines get in here.
With their bones around their neck and the bones hanging out their nose.
Hey, the world is not perfect.
Being nice can get you seriously hurting this modern.
No, see, this is the thing.
He's thinking with his heart.
You don't think with your heart.
Think with your fucking brain.
Yeah, I wish, you know what?
I wish you could open the boards in this place with turn into heaven.
Come on in, my brother.
Come in.
Yes.
Yeah, we're all in this together.
We're all in this together.
But did you learn anything from history?
Did you see what Christopher Columbus did to the damn Indians?
That's what happened.
You have open borders.
They are showing them, you know, a lot of Native Americans and Mexicans.
Mexico, they still sore about the whole Christopher Columbus thing, right?
They thought Native Americans actually taught Christopher Columbus how to plant corn.
Didn't he?
But you being facetious.
You think somebody's going to sail here 3,000 miles and they don't know how to plant corn?
No, Christopher Columbus and his boys plant stupid.
These dumbass knuckle draggers think I don't know how to plant corn.
I just came here from 4,000 miles in water.
And then he massaged them.
You can't just let a bunch of people into your country.
That's why we have borders.
Borders are so very important.
That's why we have doors.
That's why we have fences.
That's why some people live in gaity communities.
Borders, security, they mean a lot.
Every gated community I've ever been in, super nice.
Yeah.
Why We Need Fences00:01:10
I don't mind having a couple Kerns around me.
Yeah, I can live around Kerns.
You didn't take your trash out, Kevin.
I'm going to have to call HOA on you.
I can just thank you.
Make sure you keep my black ass in check.
I need some Kerns around me because I know if some nigga come around my house looking and stupid, Kern's going to be the first person to see him.
I'd rather live around a Kern than some dude that believes in no stick snitching.
Yeah.
Or no borders.
Pete just got robbed and killed.
He took all his shit.
You see what happened?
Oh, I don't believe in no snitching.
I don't like you pigs.
Yeah.
I'd take a Kern over a nigga any day.
Damn good show.
Damn.
Louis, what the hell's wrong with you?
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Maybe y'all can share this with Louis C.K. Put some damn sensing in his brain.