Flagrant - Andrew Schulz & Akaash Singh - Schulz has a NEW BABY + Why your Girlfriend Loves Gay Hockey Shows
Aired: 2026-01-14
Duration: 01:33:58


=== Happy New Year Delay (03:34) ===

[00:00:00]  What's up everybody and welcome to Flagrants.
[00:00:04]  Okay, happy new year.
[00:00:06]  Sorry for the weekly delay.
[00:00:08]  Some of you guys probably know the news.
[00:00:10]  We had a delay.
[00:00:11]  We were on delay.
[00:00:15]  Al, yo, I gotta jump on you.
[00:00:20]  He's having fun, dude.
[00:00:20]  He's riffing.
[00:00:22]  He's having it now.
[00:00:22]  He's having it now.
[00:00:23]  All right, Al.
[00:00:24]  All right, Al.
[00:00:25]  You do the intro, and we're just gonna wait patiently for you to speak perfectly for the next 30 seconds.
[00:00:31]  No, now the pressure's on.
[00:00:33]  Woke up.
[00:00:36]  Gotcha.
[00:00:37]  No, got it.
[00:00:39]  That's real.
[00:00:40]  That's retard maxing.
[00:00:41]  That's real.
[00:00:42]  Al is retard maxing.
[00:00:43]  Always encapsulated.
[00:00:45]  Always has been.
[00:00:46]  What's up, everybody?
[00:00:47]  Welcome to Flagrant.
[00:00:48]  It's your boy Schultz.
[00:00:49]  I'm here with Arkash Singh, Alex Media, Marky Gags.
[00:00:53]  What's up?
[00:00:53]  And listen, new year.
[00:00:55]  New year.
[00:00:56]  I got a new little baby.
[00:00:58]  I love you guys very much.
[00:01:00]  And that's why we were delayed a week.
[00:01:02]  But now we're back to work.
[00:01:03]  My wife is just slaving away at the house with two kids.
[00:01:06]  And it is what it is.
[00:01:08]  You know, that is life now.
[00:01:10]  How has this affected you?
[00:01:11]  I've been playing Powell every single day.
[00:01:14]  It is amazing.
[00:01:15]  How unaffected.
[00:01:16]  How unaffected.
[00:01:17]  And it's starting to eat away at my wife, but she's busy with the kids, so she can't really complain.
[00:01:20]  Yeah, but you don't want too many cooks in the house.
[00:01:22]  You know what I mean?
[00:01:22]  Like, there's already another person in there, right?
[00:01:24]  There's a new baby.
[00:01:25]  You don't want to be in there crowding up.
[00:01:26]  Exactly.
[00:01:27]  And we have a team of Trinidadian specialists that are helping take care of the kids.
[00:01:30]  My daughter, 100%, I was telling you guys this in the group said, 100% has a Trinity accent.
[00:01:35]  100%.
[00:01:36]  That's awesome.
[00:01:39]  It's not even would-be.
[00:01:40]  It is.
[00:01:41]  She doesn't speak like a white person.
[00:01:44]  She is 100% Trinidad.
[00:01:47]  I need to see this.
[00:01:48]  It is.
[00:01:48]  Fada.
[00:01:49]  Fada.
[00:01:51]  Milami, Fada.
[00:01:51]  Love me, love me, love me, Fada.
[00:01:53]  Take me to a cocoon, Fada.
[00:01:55]  Read me the book about the Cougar.
[00:01:59]  Every morning, I want to read the book about the Cougar.
[00:02:02]  But what is funny about this is my wife is a stay-at-home mom.
[00:02:04]  So what language is she speaking to my daughter?
[00:02:07]  Son, all your wife talks to is Trinidadian.
[00:02:10]  She's probably getting that accent too.
[00:02:11]  And my wife's dad was raised in Trinidad.
[00:02:13]  Oh, there you go.
[00:02:15]  So we got to keep it real.
[00:02:16]  It's in there.
[00:02:17]  Now it's just coming out.
[00:02:18]  I'm basically raising Trinidadian families.
[00:02:21]  Damn right.
[00:02:22]  Damn right.
[00:02:23]  They widen it up when they talk to you, but when it's just them.
[00:02:25]  When it's just them, they're just getting after you.
[00:02:26]  100%.
[00:02:27]  There's cougar in it up.
[00:02:28]  That's crazy.
[00:02:28]  But you always want bilingual kids.
[00:02:30]  Exactly, dude.
[00:02:31]  It's going to help with job opportunities.
[00:02:32]  Man, the first time she got to do it.
[00:02:33]  Yeah, what jobs do you think they'll be able to get?
[00:02:34]  Like a food job.
[00:02:36]  They could probably take over something like that.
[00:02:38]  I don't know.
[00:02:39]  Make a mean beef patty.
[00:02:40]  Yeah.
[00:02:41]  I play soccer better.
[00:02:43]  Probably.
[00:02:43]  It helps.
[00:02:44]  Apparently they got the best roti in Trinidad.
[00:02:46]  You know, I can believe that.
[00:02:48]  The best Barata, but is in Malaysia.
[00:02:50]  Yeah.
[00:02:51]  So.
[00:02:52]  Really?
[00:02:52]  Yeah.
[00:02:53]  That I've had.
[00:02:53]  Are there a lot of...
[00:02:54]  Oh, yeah, that's right.
[00:02:55]  There's a lot of Indians out there.
[00:02:56]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:02:56]  The best tika masala in England?
[00:02:59]  Yeah, because that's an English dish.
[00:03:01]  But what's the best Indian food from India?
[00:03:03]  Mumbai God.
[00:03:04]  That shit cracks off, dude.
[00:03:06]  That shit cracks.
[00:03:07]  Mark, what were you going to say right there?
[00:03:12]  I was just asking.
[00:03:14]  We're going to talk about the feet stew on this.
[00:03:15]  Whoa, whoa, shit.
[00:03:16]  That's racist.
[00:03:17]  That's a racist comment.
[00:03:18]  They make it.
[00:03:19]  It's all right.
[00:03:19]  No, no, no, no.
[00:03:20]  What makes it racist?
[00:03:22]  They don't all use their feet.
[00:03:24]  No, I'm saying there's one person.
[00:03:25]  Like, what are you making a racist food?
[00:03:27]  You're making a sound.
[00:03:28]  All Indians only use their feet.
[00:03:29]  They use their armpits.
[00:03:30]  It's a type of food from one day.
[00:03:32]  That shit when he takes the fucking non and white.

=== Best Tika Masala in England (07:36) ===

[00:03:35]  Yeah, I know.
[00:03:35]  And I know it's AI, right?
[00:03:37]  No.
[00:03:38]  Automatic Indian.
[00:03:40]  Exactly.
[00:03:41]  That's where it comes from, dude.
[00:03:43]  Anyway, how was your guys?
[00:03:44]  Yo, the first time he had a baby, remember there was like a 20-minute story?
[00:03:48]  This time, the second after he had a baby, he hit the group chat like, hey, so what's going on with Maduro?
[00:03:56]  I think I might have done that while the C-section was at it.
[00:03:58]  Son, I've never seen, I might have sent out a text during a C-section.
[00:04:02]  I've never seen a person drop off in enthusiasm.
[00:04:07]  Yo, it's not my enthusiasm, it's y'all's enthusiasm.
[00:04:10]  I don't even know if you guys congratulated me.
[00:04:11]  We did.
[00:04:12]  Come on, everybody.
[00:04:13]  I had him to send a text to the group chat, like, yo, I have a child now.
[00:04:19]  No, I have a child now.
[00:04:20]  And I think you might have just hearted it.
[00:04:23]  I think I got a phone call from him for like, I think I had gendered your kid.
[00:04:29]  Yeah, I did a fake compliment to my kid.
[00:04:31]  He was like, oh my gosh, she's beautiful.
[00:04:32]  I go, it's a he.
[00:04:33]  He goes, a handsome son of a gun.
[00:04:36]  I didn't know you didn't.
[00:04:37]  That's the last time I spoke to him since I had a kid.
[00:04:39]  That's the last time I spoke to him.
[00:04:40]  I asked to see you New Year's Eve and you didn't respond.
[00:04:42]  It's New Year's Eve.
[00:04:44]  I just had a child.
[00:04:46]  You want to hang out on New Year's Eve when I got a new baby?
[00:04:49]  That's a timeline mix.
[00:04:50]  Come on, bro.
[00:04:51]  That's a timeline mix.
[00:04:52]  You didn't even have a child.
[00:04:53]  You didn't have a baby, bro.
[00:04:54]  You didn't even have the baby out.
[00:04:56]  No.
[00:04:56]  Oh, shit.
[00:04:57]  My bad.
[00:04:57]  My bad.
[00:04:58]  What about last New Year's Eve?
[00:05:01]  You think you want me a way too far?
[00:05:03]  Yeah.
[00:05:04]  Come on.
[00:05:05]  Man, I asked the baby's name.
[00:05:06]  He didn't respond.
[00:05:08]  I found out via IG.
[00:05:10]  We didn't know the name until very late.
[00:05:13]  Oh, that's kind of fun.
[00:05:14]  We did a last-minute leave the hospital because we were debating between two.
[00:05:18]  Oh, really?
[00:05:19]  Yeah.
[00:05:19]  Can you share?
[00:05:20]  Yes.
[00:05:20]  There's Lincoln Lawrence Schultz.
[00:05:24]  Nick Fuentez Lawrence Schultz.
[00:05:28]  And then we went with Lincoln.
[00:05:29]  We went with Lincoln.
[00:05:30]  The other Republican.
[00:05:33]  The second best leader in American history.
[00:05:36]  No, Link is great.
[00:05:37]  Great.
[00:05:39]  Love it.
[00:05:40]  No, what was really the other option?
[00:05:42]  I love the name Jones.
[00:05:45]  Was those first names as a first name?
[00:05:47]  Yeah.
[00:05:47]  Never heard anybody with that as a first name.
[00:05:49]  That's cool.
[00:05:50]  Well, it's hard to say with Schultz.
[00:05:51]  Jones Schultz.
[00:05:52]  But like Lincoln is like, my brother's middle name is Lincoln.
[00:05:55]  My dad's name is Lawrence.
[00:05:56]  So it's basically.
[00:05:57]  And then Emma's like grandma's middle name is Lincoln, too.
[00:06:00]  Oh, really?
[00:06:01]  Oh, didn't your dad love Abraham Lincoln?
[00:06:02]  Yeah, it's the biggest.
[00:06:03]  That's why he named my brother after.
[00:06:05]  Oh, so you won.
[00:06:06]  Yeah.
[00:06:08]  Yeah.
[00:06:09]  That's what happened.
[00:06:10]  They were debating.
[00:06:12]  He won.
[00:06:13]  That's the least she could do after she carried him for 10 months is let me name it.
[00:06:17]  You know what I mean?
[00:06:18]  Like, I barely got to spend any time with that baby.
[00:06:20]  I know, dude.
[00:06:22]  You gotta wear your paddle so often, probably.
[00:06:24]  I know, dude.
[00:06:25]  Having to take her to the hospital.
[00:06:28]  Was this go-around to the hospital?
[00:06:29]  Was it normal?
[00:06:31]  No, every single time, it's absolutely terrifying.
[00:06:33]  All right.
[00:06:34]  I think because it's scheduled C-section, right?
[00:06:36]  So it's like, and in my mind, it's the same thing, which I imagine you guys are thinking.
[00:06:40]  You go in, numb it up, cut a hole, unzip, take out the baby, done.
[00:06:45]  And zip it back up.
[00:06:46]  Zip it back up.
[00:06:47]  Yes, of course.
[00:06:48]  And this one, that's kind of like what you think was happening.
[00:06:51]  There's this like curtain down.
[00:06:53]  All of a sudden, I see like this, the same doctor, her head pop up above the curtain at one point in time.
[00:07:00]  And then she starts going, the bilco cords wrapped around the neck.
[00:07:04]  And I'm like, I can't see what's happening.
[00:07:06]  Emma's kind of hearing stuff, but she's out of it.
[00:07:08]  She's asking me to tell her stories about like Shiloh to like distract her.
[00:07:13]  Yeah.
[00:07:14]  And like, I realized in that moment, like, all we do is just kind of hang out with her.
[00:07:19]  There's no stories yet.
[00:07:21]  You know what I mean?
[00:07:21]  It's not like, oh, remember when she was in her soccer game and she hit the winning goal?
[00:07:26]  It's just like, remember when we fed her three times a day so she stays alive?
[00:07:30]  Right.
[00:07:30]  So I'm like inventing making up stories.
[00:07:33]  Yeah.
[00:07:34]  Oh, remember when she said that thing she wasn't supposed to say?
[00:07:36]  And then we laughed.
[00:07:38]  She was driving a rickshaw in Port of Spain.
[00:07:41]  Come on, she'll remember that.
[00:07:43]  So, so, so, like, I'm saying that while, and then, like, I see the doctor is like pushing down to get the baby out because the baby wouldn't come out.
[00:07:53]  Like, like, Acevent.
[00:07:54]  I don't know if you guys saw Ace Winter 2, remember, like in Africa, where he like just pushes the stomach and the baby flies out.
[00:08:01]  Okay, but this is like a part of that.
[00:08:04]  Is what she was doing to get the baby to leave.
[00:08:06]  Yikes.
[00:08:07]  Interesting.
[00:08:08]  And it was so just terrifying.
[00:08:09]  And then you're like worried that Emma's going to bleed out.
[00:08:11]  And like, of course.
[00:08:13]  It's just peek around the curtain, see what's up.
[00:08:17]  When the baby was healthy, I did the thing that you should not do, and every guy will fucking do it.
[00:08:21]  Do not do it.
[00:08:23]  Every guy will do it.
[00:08:24]  I'll do it, you know, God willing.
[00:08:26]  If we're able to have another baby, I'll do it again.
[00:08:29]  But and you just glimpse for a second and you just wish that you didn't do that.
[00:08:33]  Yeah, it's brutal.
[00:08:34]  Really?
[00:08:34]  Oh my God.
[00:08:35]  Fuck.
[00:08:36]  It's one thing to witness birth where it's supposed to come out.
[00:08:38]  But like, you just saw a surgery.
[00:08:40]  Bro.
[00:08:40]  I'm going to be honest.
[00:08:41]  It's worse where it's supposed to come out.
[00:08:43]  Yeah.
[00:08:43]  No, because there's already a hole for it.
[00:08:45]  Nah.
[00:08:45]  Nah, but it ain't built for that.
[00:08:47]  Yeah, when you see that cute little thing get like that.
[00:08:52]  Hey, hey, hey, hey.
[00:08:54]  When they fucking squirm their head to get out, that shit is great.
[00:08:58]  Wait, did they do that?
[00:08:59]  Yeah.
[00:08:59]  Yeah, and then sometimes they squirmed.
[00:09:02]  None of these guys have seen that.
[00:09:03]  No, I have.
[00:09:04]  I did clinical rotations in high school because I was supposed to be a doctor.
[00:09:08]  I've seen a C-section and this couple let me illegal.
[00:09:13]  It should have been.
[00:09:13]  But this couple, they came and asked the mom and the dad.
[00:09:16]  They're like, this kid is, he wants to be a doctor one day.
[00:09:18]  He's doing this as part of his high school program.
[00:09:20]  Would you be okay with him watching?
[00:09:22]  And they were like, yeah.
[00:09:22]  So I'm in the room.
[00:09:24]  I'm in the room.
[00:09:25]  I'm on the other pussy.
[00:09:27]  First pussy I saw.
[00:09:29]  You know what's crazy?
[00:09:30]  That, and I worked in a nursing home.
[00:09:31]  So I saw old.
[00:09:32]  Blue pussy too.
[00:09:35]  I cleaned it.
[00:09:35]  Perineal care.
[00:09:36]  Oh, I'm 16 years old.
[00:09:40]  I'm watching childbirth.
[00:09:41]  I see the baby squirm its fucking head to get out.
[00:09:44]  The baby juice or whatever the fuck flies everywhere.
[00:09:47]  I'm legit.
[00:09:48]  I'm not ready for this.
[00:09:49]  So I do a full fucking one sexy.
[00:09:54]  So the dad was buying a mom.
[00:09:56]  I'm like, what the fuck is this little veck doing in here?
[00:09:58]  Get him out of here.
[00:09:59]  Yeah.
[00:10:00]  Dude, I had no clue about this about you.
[00:10:02]  Yeah, dude, I forget all this shit because it was so far.
[00:10:04]  You know what I mean?
[00:10:05]  There was a whole failure of becoming a doctor after that that blocked out.
[00:10:08]  You're trying to block it out.
[00:10:09]  Tell me about the C-section.
[00:10:11]  C-section, they cut it.
[00:10:12]  That was what I saw first.
[00:10:13]  They cut it.
[00:10:13]  It's bloody, but they cut the stomach open and then they kind of just pull the baby out.
[00:10:17]  Yeah.
[00:10:17]  Which is, theirs didn't have any college.
[00:10:19]  Are they pulling out organs and stuff too?
[00:10:21]  Not like there was shit just all over the place.
[00:10:23]  And then they pulled the afterbirth, the placenta shit.
[00:10:25]  And so it's like a second little lump that comes out.
[00:10:28]  But I didn't see any organs.
[00:10:29]  I didn't see any crazy shit.
[00:10:31]  The natural shit.
[00:10:32]  I thought her liver was just chilling on the table.
[00:10:34]  And I looked over for a second.
[00:10:35]  There's blood everywhere.
[00:10:36]  And I thought that they just removed her whole insides to get out there.
[00:10:39]  I know it doesn't make any logical sense.
[00:10:42]  But I mean, there were bags and bags and bags of blood.
[00:10:44]  Oh, God.
[00:10:45]  Yeah.
[00:10:46]  I don't remember that much blood.
[00:10:47]  Maybe I just forgot.
[00:10:48]  It was 25 years ago or whatever.
[00:10:49]  You've seen it.
[00:10:50]  Which one did you find tougher?
[00:10:53]  The vaginal was tough.
[00:10:54]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:10:55]  Because that it ripped shit down to his body.
[00:10:57]  Oh, yeah, they're shit, and they got the bag underneath just this blue fucking garbage bag.
[00:11:02]  Get off the recycling.
[00:11:06]  Yeah, it's a recycling bag.
[00:11:07]  They throw it in the glass pile afterward.
[00:11:10]  The C-section was much better.

=== C-Section Placenta Stories (13:31) ===

[00:11:12]  Yeah, dude.
[00:11:12]  I agree.
[00:11:13]  Pulled it out.
[00:11:13]  Oh, yeah.
[00:11:14]  And then they took the placenta and just put it right on a stone.
[00:11:16]  I was like, no, dude, it was nothing.
[00:11:19]  But they were just so rough with it.
[00:11:20]  Like, just crazy that that's proto-they are rough with it.
[00:11:24]  You gotta rush it.
[00:11:24]  Yeah.
[00:11:25]  Yeah.
[00:11:25]  All right, guys.
[00:11:26]  Show announce, and we're all doing this in less than 10 seconds.
[00:11:30]  I will go right now.
[00:11:31]  We begin March 28th, Providence, Rhode Island, August 8th, Halifax, Nova Scotia.
[00:11:35]  Ah, gosh.
[00:11:36]  January 15th through 18th, this weekend, Phoenix, Arizona.
[00:11:39]  This Friday and Saturday, Salt Lake City at Wise Guys.
[00:11:41]  January 24th, Cancel Comedy, Hard Rock Casino.
[00:11:44]  Thank you guys.
[00:11:45]  Casino?
[00:11:47]  No.
[00:11:48]  Cafe?
[00:11:48]  Card Rock Cafe.
[00:11:50]  And we're back.
[00:11:50]  You're just trying to tell stories the whole time while they're just ripping.
[00:11:53]  I got no fucking clue what was going on.
[00:11:55]  Honestly, that sounds harder.
[00:11:57]  You trying to stay locked in?
[00:11:59]  I just know.
[00:11:59]  And I'm usually good at kind of talking in front of people.
[00:12:02]  And that one.
[00:12:03]  You're not ready.
[00:12:04]  You had no prep.
[00:12:06]  You got no material.
[00:12:06]  You know what I mean?
[00:12:07]  No one likes a heckler.
[00:12:08]  Unresponsive crowd.
[00:12:09]  Yeah.
[00:12:09]  Yeah.
[00:12:10]  That baby's heckling.
[00:12:12]  Too much going on.
[00:12:13]  Oh, just terrifying.
[00:12:14]  Just terrifying.
[00:12:15]  But it worked out.
[00:12:16]  It really is fun.
[00:12:17]  We got a beautiful baby.
[00:12:18]  Shout out to Link.
[00:12:19]  How's it?
[00:12:19]  Emma is recovering.
[00:12:20]  How's it different having a son than a daughter?
[00:12:22]  Do you feel different?
[00:12:24]  You feel a different bond?
[00:12:26]  It is different.
[00:12:27]  Really?
[00:12:28]  Yeah.
[00:12:28]  It is different, I feel.
[00:12:29]  How so?
[00:12:32]  You just like him more.
[00:12:33]  Like you just immediately.
[00:12:36]  No, no, no, I'm much more inappropriate with him.
[00:12:44]  So like he's two days old.
[00:12:48]  Yeah, but like the second I saw his like dick and balls, like I'm immediately commenting on it.
[00:12:55]  Like immediately I'm making jokes about it.
[00:12:57]  Like I'm telling all the nurses, like, you know, I'm just doing the classic like dad shit, you know?
[00:13:04]  And I'm messing around with like our, our, you know, our nannies and the baby nurse.
[00:13:09]  And like, it just, I'm, I'm teasing about him in a very different, inappropriate way that I could not do with Shiloh.
[00:13:16]  Yeah.
[00:13:16]  Like Shiloh, it's like pure protection.
[00:13:18]  I love you.
[00:13:19]  I don't ever want.
[00:13:20]  I don't even feel comfortable joking around in any kind of like sexual scenario with Shiloh.
[00:13:26]  But with Link, it's like immediately he's breastfeeding on my wife.
[00:13:29]  And I'm just, I'm making sounds.
[00:13:32]  Like, it's just any, I feel very comfortable being like inappropriate.
[00:13:37]  Come on.
[00:13:37]  Dude, is that?
[00:13:38]  I feel like that's a good idea.
[00:13:39]  Is that odd to say?
[00:13:41]  For whatever reason, I'm like, I don't know.
[00:13:43]  I'm like really protective over Shiloh.
[00:13:44]  Yeah, it feels like how it should be.
[00:13:45]  Like, that's daddy's little girl.
[00:13:46]  And then this is dad's friend in the making.
[00:13:48]  Y'all are going to be friends.
[00:13:50]  Y'all are going to be best friends.
[00:13:51]  That's what you want with your son and your dad.
[00:13:52]  And then your daughter is like, I mean, obviously we get along, but that's my little baby.
[00:13:56]  That's my little baby girl.
[00:13:57]  Yeah.
[00:13:57]  It is.
[00:13:58]  Yeah, so far.
[00:13:59]  Sucking noises.
[00:14:00]  Those are crazy.
[00:14:02]  Hell yeah.
[00:14:03]  Get that.
[00:14:04]  Get that.
[00:14:05]  Get that out.
[00:14:06]  I think I would do that with my daughter and Silo.
[00:14:10]  Yeah, I don't know.
[00:14:11]  Damn, you have a kid?
[00:14:12]  Yeah, my baby will breastfeed disrespectfully and I don't like it.
[00:14:15]  You don't like it?
[00:14:15]  No, because it's disrespectful.
[00:14:17]  What does he do?
[00:14:18]  Because he'll be on the bus.
[00:14:19]  How old is that motherfucker?
[00:14:20]  15 months.
[00:14:21]  Still?
[00:14:21]  Yeah.
[00:14:22]  Isn't that crazy?
[00:14:23]  That's what I saw.
[00:14:24]  I'm like, grow up.
[00:14:25]  Still on the bottom.
[00:14:25]  It's fantastic.
[00:14:27]  That's all this is for you, bro.
[00:14:28]  Hey, you're trying to keep that titty girl.
[00:14:31]  That's what I do.
[00:14:32]  You don't want that titty.
[00:14:34]  You want them titties, bro.
[00:14:37]  You keeping him like a dairy pal.
[00:14:39]  That's crazy.
[00:14:41]  With all due respect.
[00:14:42]  No, no, with all due respect.
[00:14:44]  Because Emma's stacked right now.
[00:14:45]  I looked at her today and I said, we got to take pics.
[00:14:48]  I said, dude, I put a picture of Emma's nipple on Instagram by accident.
[00:14:52]  That was wild.
[00:14:53]  You want to know the wilderness?
[00:14:54]  You want to know the wilderness?
[00:14:56]  Emma, private on Instagram.
[00:14:58]  I looked at her.
[00:14:59]  Emma's private on Instagram.
[00:15:04]  She wants no attention, like nothing, right?
[00:15:06]  Like, and she, once you have a kid, your body is not the same in terms of your relation and the sexualization of it.
[00:15:15]  Like, once women have a kid, it's not like, she was almost like, ah, whatever.
[00:15:19]  You posted it.
[00:15:20]  Yeah.
[00:15:21]  Like, I literally, she was like, I think I can delete it.
[00:15:24]  She's like, if you can delete it, delete it, but I don't care.
[00:15:25]  Like, she doesn't see her nipples in the same way.
[00:15:28]  It's a weapon, dude.
[00:15:29]  That's a tool.
[00:15:31]  It's a fork.
[00:15:32]  Yeah.
[00:15:33]  Like, they see it like a fucking piece of silverware.
[00:15:36]  Before the baby, my girl is a little bit more.
[00:15:37]  But the rest of the internet doesn't.
[00:15:40]  That's true.
[00:15:41]  That is very true.
[00:15:42]  That is very true.
[00:15:43]  They do not.
[00:15:44]  They're like, Schultz, what are you thinking?
[00:15:46]  It was funny because I got all these DMs, bro.
[00:15:48]  No, I got all these DNSs.
[00:15:50]  But they were like, bro, I know you haven't slept in days.
[00:15:53]  And it's like, I've slept every single night.
[00:15:55]  My weakness is 99%.
[00:15:57]  I posted this on eight hours of sleep.
[00:16:00]  Like, put your girl's nipples on.
[00:16:02]  You should probably take that down.
[00:16:03]  Anyway, bro, before the baby, girls will be like, oh, I don't want to wear this bikini at like the family function because it's like, it's too revealing.
[00:16:09]  The second baby comes out, parents in the room just double-dropped.
[00:16:11]  Dude, feeding it up.
[00:16:13]  My double-dropped.
[00:16:16]  Because it's just like, oh, he's crying.
[00:16:17]  I'm sorry.
[00:16:18]  Someone else might need some.
[00:16:18]  Mark, hold on.
[00:16:20]  You just got to try to hang it out in case enough.
[00:16:22]  Because this is the disrespectful part.
[00:16:24]  This is what I was saying.
[00:16:25]  He doesn't just utilize one.
[00:16:26]  He'll be on one and then this little hand will pop up and then he'll start twiddling the other one.
[00:16:30]  Nah, you know what?
[00:16:33]  Wait, wait, wait a minute.
[00:16:34]  Wait a minute.
[00:16:35]  Have you noticed this?
[00:16:36]  Wait, hold on.
[00:16:37]  Wait, wait, no, shut up.
[00:16:38]  Shut up, shut up.
[00:16:41]  Yo, you remember, and he denies this to this day.
[00:16:45]  Remember Miami?
[00:16:46]  I knew when Dove said he walked in his crib and he just saw a mad shit.
[00:16:56]  Like, were we allowed to say this?
[00:16:58]  What?
[00:16:58]  When what happened in the room?
[00:17:00]  Wait, this is not a true Miami.
[00:17:03]  What room?
[00:17:03]  When Dove walked into the oh my god, we're doing this again, bro.
[00:17:07]  Come on, guys.
[00:17:09]  Are you gonna believe this?
[00:17:10]  You guys are gonna believe this.
[00:17:11]  You just said that's what goes on here with him now.
[00:17:17]  Daily Sam.
[00:17:19]  Okay, we're a tribe, okay?
[00:17:20]  We do primitive style parents crazy.
[00:17:25]  Sometimes it pops out, you gotta feed the baby.
[00:17:26]  You kind of lean over and decide out there.
[00:17:29]  Okay, can we just feed the kid?
[00:17:31]  You just banish her to another room, you send her away, say, Go away, heathen.
[00:17:35]  You're impure.
[00:17:36]  No, no, I agree with you.
[00:17:37]  I don't think that the body should be sexualized.
[00:17:39]  Exactly.
[00:17:40]  You whip them both out when you have one kid.
[00:17:42]  Because he needs to dial the radio, bro.
[00:17:44]  I'm telling you.
[00:17:45]  He's trying to tune the fucking thing.
[00:17:46]  You're trying to get the FM.
[00:17:48]  He's on it.
[00:17:49]  That is.
[00:17:50]  That's the gag now.
[00:17:52]  That's the baby.
[00:17:53]  He's doing it.
[00:17:54]  Staring at me.
[00:17:54]  My kid and probably every kid, but my kid loves them titties so much, bro.
[00:17:59]  He'll be eating, right?
[00:18:00]  He'll be eating.
[00:18:01]  Throw up on a titty while he's eating and then just keep on eating.
[00:18:08]  And I'm like, get it.
[00:18:09]  Get it, little man.
[00:18:12]  Get it.
[00:18:12]  Don't pull off for nothing.
[00:18:13]  Don't be stopped.
[00:18:15]  Take that down.
[00:18:16]  Take that down.
[00:18:18]  He should have had nothing daughter yet.
[00:18:21]  I need this boy to harden me up again.
[00:18:24]  No, Paul, I need it.
[00:18:25]  I did.
[00:18:27]  Paul takes the crazy.
[00:18:28]  I got too soft.
[00:18:30]  I got too soft.
[00:18:31]  I need that boy to harden me up again.
[00:18:33]  I need him to harden me up.
[00:18:35]  He's on out here gagging on.
[00:18:36]  Come on, son.
[00:18:37]  Yo, get gagged.
[00:18:38]  Why'd you say gag?
[00:18:40]  Gag?
[00:18:40]  Why'd you say mine?
[00:18:41]  No gag respects in this fucking family.
[00:18:43]  Gag?
[00:18:45]  Yo, he's taking it down, thrown up out the corner of his mouth, keeps on sucking.
[00:18:50]  That's crazy.
[00:18:51]  And if my wife tries to wipe his mouth, he's like, fuck off, me, woman.
[00:18:56]  I'm getting mine.
[00:18:57]  He's like, Rocky, dude.
[00:18:58]  Yeah.
[00:18:59]  Keeps it moving.
[00:19:00]  It's kind of beautiful.
[00:19:01]  He is unstoppable, dude.
[00:19:02]  Yeah, it's kind of beautiful, dude.
[00:19:04]  Yeah.
[00:19:05]  So I think he came out dick hard.
[00:19:10]  100%.
[00:19:11]  I think he came out dick hard.
[00:19:13]  Hacking?
[00:19:14]  Look, man, I was like, yo, he got a huge dick and red balls.
[00:19:18]  His balls were so red.
[00:19:20]  Oh, yeah, yeah.
[00:19:20]  Like the sack was so.
[00:19:22]  That's why we got you these, by the way.
[00:19:23]  Yeah, that's what it looked like.
[00:19:24]  That's what it looked like.
[00:19:26]  And Emma's like in a daze.
[00:19:28]  And I was like, I was like, yeah.
[00:19:29]  I was like, yo, I think you got a huge dick.
[00:19:31]  And Emma goes, she's like, she's like, she's like, really?
[00:19:35]  She goes, in a genuine way, she's like, how do you know what a kid's dick is, big or not?
[00:19:41]  Good question.
[00:19:43]  Question.
[00:19:44]  And I'm just like, honestly, I have no clue.
[00:19:46]  I was just really hoping that.
[00:19:50]  No, I've seen a lot of kids dick.
[00:19:52]  Yeah, this is a good thing.
[00:19:52]  I'm doing research.
[00:19:53]  Damn, that's crazy, dude.
[00:19:54]  So, your kid was starting the C-section from the inside.
[00:19:57]  I think so.
[00:19:59]  I'm not leaving.
[00:20:01]  He said, I'm not leaving.
[00:20:03]  You hit him with the Leo.
[00:20:06]  I'm not leaving.
[00:20:07]  I'm not fucking leaving.
[00:20:08]  No, but he's never seen pussy, man.
[00:20:10]  Damn.
[00:20:11]  He never felt it.
[00:20:12]  He felt it.
[00:20:13]  He never felt pussy.
[00:20:14]  He felt it.
[00:20:15]  No, because he had an IVF.
[00:20:17]  So he didn't feel it on the way in.
[00:20:20]  This motherfucker never felt.
[00:20:22]  We got to give him a feel, so maybe that's why he loves Titty so much.
[00:20:26]  But isn't that crazy?
[00:20:27]  Didn't feel it on the way out.
[00:20:28]  Didn't feel on the way in.
[00:20:30]  Damn.
[00:20:32]  There's still helpful on him, though.
[00:20:33]  He got you a future, what's it called?
[00:20:35]  Gold star.
[00:20:36]  I thought about that.
[00:20:37]  Like, that's above platinum.
[00:20:39]  Yeah.
[00:20:42]  Oh, that's beautiful, dude.
[00:20:43]  The miracle of life.
[00:20:44]  The miracle of life, man.
[00:20:46]  That's amazing.
[00:20:48]  By the way, did the doctor see the Netflix special?
[00:20:50]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:20:52]  Did she have anything to say?
[00:20:54]  Yeah, she, she, first of all, she was like, first thing she said was, uh, he's to my wife, she says, he's a comedian.
[00:21:02]  I go, she's like, yeah.
[00:21:04]  And he's like, she's like, wow.
[00:21:07]  I didn't find him funny at all.
[00:21:12]  Yeah, the most terrifying day of my life.
[00:21:13]  Yeah, I'm horrified.
[00:21:15]  I couldn't breathe for about a year leading up to this moment.
[00:21:17]  Maybe that's why.
[00:21:18]  Maybe I was really stressed every time they come here, hoping to hear a fucking heartbeat.
[00:21:23]  You can't explain why you were bombing to a person.
[00:21:25]  No, you know what I mean?
[00:21:27]  And then we were trying to do that.
[00:21:28]  That was a stressful time.
[00:21:29]  You're like, all right, you're trying to ham it up the second time.
[00:21:31]  Nah.
[00:21:32]  What do you do for work?
[00:21:33]  That's why he was doing it.
[00:21:34]  You're not.
[00:21:35]  I was, I was, uh, yeah, I was like, I don't know, man.
[00:21:40]  I don't know what to say, Mark.
[00:21:42]  I don't know what to say.
[00:21:43]  How's your dog doing?
[00:21:44]  Is your dog?
[00:21:45]  Oh, yeah.
[00:21:45]  Your dog's getting further neglected.
[00:21:47]  No, no, no.
[00:21:47]  I'm good with the dog now.
[00:21:49]  Oh, really?
[00:21:49]  Yeah, because now y'all are both in just a minute.
[00:21:51]  No, this was fire.
[00:21:52]  The dog, it's karma is a beautiful thing.
[00:21:55]  It's a beautiful thing, Karma.
[00:21:57]  Why is that?
[00:21:57]  Because the dog will annoy Emma and I.
[00:22:04]  But Shiloh annoys that dog.
[00:22:07]  Oh, yeah.
[00:22:08]  Oh, Shiloh is giving that dog a run for its running.
[00:22:12]  Oh, yeah, yeah.
[00:22:13]  Oh, non-stop.
[00:22:14]  The second she wakes up.
[00:22:15]  Shiloh got a fake dog that looks just like our dog.
[00:22:19]  Another Savi and carries it around all day and still is just driving this dog crazy.
[00:22:26]  Shiloh feeds Sabi every morning, feeds Sabi every night.
[00:22:30]  And the second she's Sabi's done eating, Shiloh is driving that motherfucker crazy.
[00:22:35]  They have no life-preserving skills.
[00:22:37]  Like little babies.
[00:22:38]  None.
[00:22:38]  My little baby will do is like grab the cat's tail.
[00:22:40]  Oh, yeah.
[00:22:41]  Cat will spin around, swat him, and he's just dying last.
[00:22:43]  Dying.
[00:22:44]  My best friend told me that.
[00:22:45]  He said, All you're doing is trying to keep your kid from killing themselves.
[00:22:49]  That's like the first five years.
[00:22:50]  That's all it is.
[00:22:51]  And they try.
[00:22:53]  They try.
[00:22:54]  And then you try to like coach him.
[00:22:55]  You're like, no, no, no, gentle, gentle.
[00:22:57]  And the kid just smacks the dog on the head.
[00:22:59]  And you're like, all right.
[00:22:59]  Oh, that's right.
[00:23:00]  You have to say gentle because they don't understand the concept of no when they're younger.
[00:23:04]  Like they don't know a negative.
[00:23:06]  Don't touch.
[00:23:07]  They just know what touch means.
[00:23:09]  So you have to find other ways to tell them to do things.
[00:23:11]  So when my daughter slaps the shit out of me, I have to say gentle.
[00:23:15]  So she's like, I'm like, gentle.
[00:23:17]  She's like, yeah.
[00:23:20]  But if you say don't hit, then they're like, oh, hit.
[00:23:22]  Yeah.
[00:23:22]  I'll smack the shit out of this dog.
[00:23:24]  Yeah, they just hear hit.
[00:23:25]  I can't believe your wife's still breastfeeding with all due respect.
[00:23:27]  I didn't mean to.
[00:23:28]  I thought it was 18 months, right?
[00:23:30]  Nah.
[00:23:31]  Yeah.
[00:23:31]  I mean, in New York, it's like a month.
[00:23:34]  Yeah, New York is a very New York family.
[00:23:37]  Yeah, we're in Florida time.
[00:23:38]  A deep south family.
[00:23:39]  It was important for Emma to go a year and that, like, it is.
[00:23:42]  Why are you surprised?
[00:23:43]  Didn't you get breastfed till like four years old?
[00:23:45]  Oh, me?
[00:23:46]  Yeah.
[00:23:46]  You said you my dad took care of me.
[00:23:49]  Hold on.
[00:23:50]  Whoa, you didn't notice your dad breastfed?
[00:23:52]  No, my dad stayed home.
[00:23:54]  My mom went back to work.
[00:23:55]  I knew he was hung by it.
[00:23:58]  That's where I got most of my testosterone.
[00:24:01]  So, how long were you on the milk for?
[00:24:02]  Say, yeah, how long were you milking?
[00:24:04]  I don't think they gave me milk.
[00:24:06]  I think I was Dr. Pepper and Cheetos for the most six months for the first six months.
[00:24:11]  For real.
[00:24:11]  Like, I got maybe formula or something.
[00:24:13]  I don't know how much breastfeeding I was doing.
[00:24:15]  Oh, I thought you said you breastfed until late.
[00:24:18]  Nah, nah, nah.
[00:24:18]  That was you.
[00:24:20]  That was you.
[00:24:21]  Nah.
[00:24:22]  No, no, I'm not.
[00:24:22]  I'm definitely a formula kid.
[00:24:24]  You were formula, right?
[00:24:25]  Yeah, I think my mom went back to work.
[00:24:27]  And like, my dad was able to take off.
[00:24:29]  Like, he didn't get paid for it, but you could, you wouldn't get fired if you're a man and you like didn't go to work if you had a kid.
[00:24:34]  But they're like, we ain't gonna pay you.
[00:24:36]  And so he stayed with me, I think, for like the first six months.
[00:24:38]  Wow.
[00:24:39]  So we were just chilling.
[00:24:40]  Oh, that's awesome.
[00:24:41]  Better dad, better dad than you, though.

=== Dr Pepper and Cheetos Diet (10:25) ===

[00:24:43]  Huh?
[00:24:43]  Better dad than you.
[00:24:45]  Damn, bro.
[00:24:45]  Damn.
[00:24:46]  That is rough, dude.
[00:24:48]  Of all people.
[00:24:49]  I'm going to hit him with honesty this early.
[00:24:53]  I'm not going to try to be a good dad.
[00:24:55]  You know what I mean?
[00:24:56]  Take two at least.
[00:24:57]  I did take two weeks off.
[00:25:00]  No.
[00:25:01]  No, technically.
[00:25:02]  I didn't.
[00:25:03]  The third, it was 10 days.
[00:25:05]  Yeah.
[00:25:05]  Week and a half.
[00:25:06]  Week and a half.
[00:25:08]  Now you're back in here slaving away.
[00:25:09]  Damn, bro.
[00:25:10]  I feel like shit now.
[00:25:12]  You know, my wife is alone with an army of Trinidadian care workers.
[00:25:17]  Shiloh got a whole special, bro.
[00:25:20]  Shiloh, I'm telling you, dude.
[00:25:24]  I'm telling you.
[00:25:25]  People don't care, bro.
[00:25:25]  People don't care.
[00:25:26]  People, y'all don't care.
[00:25:27]  Wait, what do you mean?
[00:25:28]  No, you guys don't care.
[00:25:30]  You guys didn't even say congratulations.
[00:25:35]  I say, guys, I had a baby to the group chat.
[00:25:37]  A couple of y'all hearted it.
[00:25:38]  A couple of y'all thumbs up.
[00:25:40]  I darling was just captured, bro.
[00:25:41]  There's a lot of stuff.
[00:25:42]  This fucking retard goes.
[00:25:44]  He goes, your heir is here and spells it E-I-R.
[00:25:50]  No, I didn't.
[00:25:51]  No, I didn't.
[00:25:53]  Because I definitely chat GPT a lot.
[00:26:00]  A lot of Al's texts be coming up with dashes.
[00:26:01]  Oh, I don't know if you noticed it.
[00:26:03]  There's been a lot of dashes in the message.
[00:26:04]  Have you been using Chat GPT?
[00:26:06]  Yeah, all the time.
[00:26:07]  To send text messages to people?
[00:26:08]  Yeah.
[00:26:08]  Really?
[00:26:09]  Really?
[00:26:09]  It's helpful?
[00:26:10]  Yeah.
[00:26:12]  You said talk to Alice.
[00:26:13]  If it's just me, it's going to be every nigga this, nigga, that, nigga, that.
[00:26:16]  Everybody only.
[00:26:16]  Doesn't your Chat GBT talk like a black person?
[00:26:18]  Hold on.
[00:26:19]  You're concerned that you'll say the M-word too much if it's you talking?
[00:26:23]  Yeah, because I'm talking to some white niggas.
[00:26:25]  Al doesn't use it a lot around non-black people.
[00:26:28]  I don't know if you notice.
[00:26:29]  He says it's selective.
[00:26:30]  I've been curious to laugh, but that's about it.
[00:26:32]  Yeah.
[00:26:33]  That is true.
[00:26:33]  He whitens it up around us.
[00:26:34]  That's always dressed like that.
[00:26:35]  Oh, so you code switching with us?
[00:26:37]  Nah.
[00:26:38]  It's not necessarily a privilege to be just out of uncomfortable.
[00:26:43]  When do you hang out with non-white people?
[00:26:45]  I'm just trying to understand.
[00:26:46]  You went up home with a white woman.
[00:26:48]  Over the break.
[00:26:51]  You work with white and Indian people.
[00:26:53]  Over the break, he was with an entire country of non-whites.
[00:26:55]  And then over the break, you went to Spain.
[00:26:58]  I'll get that.
[00:27:00]  You got to get that.
[00:27:01]  You are.
[00:27:02]  He's not because I'm moving there.
[00:27:04]  Yeah, but you can say it.
[00:27:06]  They don't care.
[00:27:07]  Also, they're not white.
[00:27:08]  Yeah, they aren't that.
[00:27:09]  They think you're that.
[00:27:10]  Yeah.
[00:27:11]  No, they think you're something else.
[00:27:12]  They think I'm something else.
[00:27:14]  The word you just said is short for Hispanic.
[00:27:16]  I'm not sure for Spanish.
[00:27:18]  Yeah, but they don't see Hispanic when they look at people.
[00:27:20]  Well, they don't see Hispanic when they look in a mirror either.
[00:27:23]  So the word is fine.
[00:27:25]  Hey, they speak Spanish, they Spanish.
[00:27:27]  That's the New York rule.
[00:27:28]  That's some white people.
[00:27:29]  That's the New York.
[00:27:30]  You know the New York rule.
[00:27:31]  Don't pull me in.
[00:27:32]  You know the New York rule.
[00:27:33]  I want to go back to pretending that he's not.
[00:27:36]  So you code switch around us and you have to be a different version of yourself with your fucking painted nails.
[00:27:41]  Stop just thinking the nigga that much.
[00:27:43]  No, he doesn't.
[00:27:44]  That's the only thing.
[00:27:45]  No, it's one of my careers.
[00:27:46]  You never say it that much.
[00:27:48]  Around you?
[00:27:49]  Yeah, dude.
[00:27:50]  Can I tell you this is one of my biggest.
[00:27:51]  You're not around nobody else.
[00:27:54]  You're not around nobody else to be saying it.
[00:27:56]  Okay.
[00:27:57]  This is one of my biggest gripes with Al.
[00:27:59]  That's why I feel like you don't use it, that you're not that good at using it.
[00:28:02]  Oh, man.
[00:28:03]  I told you this.
[00:28:04]  That is true.
[00:28:04]  You aren't that good at it.
[00:28:05]  It's not good, right?
[00:28:06]  Some people are really good.
[00:28:07]  Cam Patterson, I'm not a good man.
[00:28:09]  Fucking vintage.
[00:28:11]  It's like a beautiful Merlot.
[00:28:12]  Yeah, but you're in the middle every time you see it.
[00:28:14]  You're not a shooter, bro.
[00:28:15]  You're not a shooter.
[00:28:17]  Some people got it.
[00:28:18]  They're like Steph with it.
[00:28:19]  They just drop it and it buckets every single time.
[00:28:22]  I'm a fundamental player, you know?
[00:28:23]  You are more fun.
[00:28:24]  You're like, I'm trying to think.
[00:28:26]  You're like that Australian guy.
[00:28:28]  Steve Blake?
[00:28:29]  No, no, no.
[00:28:30]  Adams.
[00:28:31]  Stephen Adams.
[00:28:32]  You're like Stephen Adams.
[00:28:33]  You're like Stephen Adams.
[00:28:34]  Yeah.
[00:28:35]  Mark.
[00:28:38]  He's good, too.
[00:28:40]  If you didn't put it out, I was like, oh, shit, you know what?
[00:28:43]  But Josh Giddy, also.
[00:28:44]  Yeah, also him.
[00:28:45]  No, that's Mark Loop.
[00:28:49]  Yeah, that's true.
[00:28:51]  Objectively speaking, who do you think has the best M-word in the office?
[00:28:56]  Objectively speaking.
[00:29:01]  And why don't we all just look in the direction of that person on three?
[00:29:04]  One, two, three.
[00:29:06]  Oh, hell yeah.
[00:29:07]  Al, good job.
[00:29:09]  I say, I saved you.
[00:29:10]  I saved you.
[00:29:13]  You know, Miles is over there, right?
[00:29:16]  Al, good job.
[00:29:17]  Good job.
[00:29:17]  I wanted to save you.
[00:29:18]  I appreciate that a lot.
[00:29:19]  No, but seriously, do you think?
[00:29:20]  I don't know if Miles ever said it.
[00:29:24]  Put sunglasses back on.
[00:29:25]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:29:25]  Hold on.
[00:29:26]  I don't know if Miles ever said it, but if you did say it, I do feel like it would sound cooler.
[00:29:30]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:29:31]  No, Miles got that.
[00:29:33]  Miles said, Give me that.
[00:29:34]  Give me, give me a little.
[00:29:35]  You can't handle all that.
[00:29:36]  Come on, Miles.
[00:29:37]  No.
[00:29:38]  No.
[00:29:38]  Yeah, no, don't.
[00:29:39]  What are you doing, Joe?
[00:29:41]  Come on, Miles.
[00:29:42]  What do you mean?
[00:29:42]  Come on, Miles.
[00:29:44]  Yo.
[00:29:47]  What do you do?
[00:29:48]  What, what, what?
[00:29:50]  I need to do something crazy.
[00:29:51]  Al, Al.
[00:29:52]  What's up?
[00:29:52]  I want you to feel comfortable and confident.
[00:29:55]  I feel very comfortable.
[00:29:57]  Is this too wide of a space?
[00:29:58]  You think?
[00:29:59]  Yeah.
[00:30:01]  Is the office, is the studio environment?
[00:30:03]  Is it too white?
[00:30:04]  Oh, yeah.
[00:30:04]  You guys just playing with a dick outside.
[00:30:07]  Hold on.
[00:30:07]  Fuck.
[00:30:08]  It was a dildo.
[00:30:09]  All right.
[00:30:09]  That's a difference.
[00:30:10]  Yeah.
[00:30:11]  A reasonably sized dildo.
[00:30:13]  Yeah.
[00:30:14]  Yeah.
[00:30:15]  Why is that?
[00:30:15]  Why is that?
[00:30:16]  I mean, like.
[00:30:17]  Black guys have dick.
[00:30:18]  He stuck it on his forehead.
[00:30:19]  You have an LGBTQ business.
[00:30:23]  Your business is LGBTQ.
[00:30:25]  Your nails are LGBTQ.
[00:30:26]  Okay, but you guys said a white space.
[00:30:28]  Yeah.
[00:30:28]  This is a very white space.
[00:30:30]  But you're just now you're talking about us playing with a penis.
[00:30:32]  But like white people shit.
[00:30:33]  Black people are sex positive.
[00:30:35]  We're sex positive.
[00:30:35]  Are you against sex positivity?
[00:30:37]  You have a sex positive business.
[00:30:39]  Yep.
[00:30:39]  Yeah.
[00:30:40]  We want to make the gay people in the studio feel comfortable.
[00:30:42]  Yeah.
[00:30:42]  So I stuck a giant massive white throbbing cock on my forehead.
[00:30:46]  That's more Hispanic.
[00:30:49]  It was a little darker.
[00:30:50]  Yeah.
[00:30:51]  That was a Hispanic dick.
[00:30:52]  That is funny too.
[00:30:55]  What do you mean?
[00:30:55]  And it was uncut.
[00:30:56]  And it was an uncut dick.
[00:30:57]  Yeah, nah, that dick, that's that's Spanish dick.
[00:30:59]  That Spanish dick?
[00:31:00]  Yeah.
[00:31:00]  Wait, why did you find it with Spanish?
[00:31:02]  The guys were saying they thought it was big.
[00:31:05]  Nah, it's a decent size.
[00:31:10]  You thought that was like a big penis you would describe it as?
[00:31:12]  I would say it's a decent size.
[00:31:14]  I thought it was massive.
[00:31:16]  Wait, what does that mean?
[00:31:17]  Decent?
[00:31:18]  It's decent.
[00:31:19]  But like, it's not small.
[00:31:20]  It's not huge.
[00:31:21]  Is that bigger than yours?
[00:31:22]  Would you say?
[00:31:23]  No, very close.
[00:31:25]  Would you say that that dick is longer than yours?
[00:31:30]  It's a little girthier towards the base.
[00:31:37]  Great as the dick.
[00:31:39]  You can't show it.
[00:31:39]  You can't show it.
[00:31:40]  You're in trouble.
[00:31:42]  I was really studying.
[00:31:43]  I was like, yo, this shit is close to my shit.
[00:31:46]  But you would say that one's a little girthier and then a little bit longer than yours.
[00:31:49]  No.
[00:31:50]  Oh, you think you're longer than that?
[00:31:51]  No, it's about the same.
[00:31:53]  Like I held it, it's about the same.
[00:31:56]  So you're by the back.
[00:31:58]  You could tell the exact length.
[00:32:01]  No, I held the shit like this.
[00:32:02]  But you're gay.
[00:32:04]  Can you held it up?
[00:32:05]  You put it on his face.
[00:32:06]  Yeah.
[00:32:07]  And dick just a tear.
[00:32:08]  Yeah, but that's white clothes stuff.
[00:32:09]  Hold on, hold on.
[00:32:10]  You're just being gay.
[00:32:11]  Hold on a second.
[00:32:12]  That's why you can't be in the office.
[00:32:13]  You just walk in and just dicks.
[00:32:15]  And then you can pick it up and now I'm gay.
[00:32:19]  You held a dick to your dick, though?
[00:32:21]  No, I held it around.
[00:32:23]  He's got muscle memory of his hand around his dick is what he's trying to say.
[00:32:26]  Okay, yeah.
[00:32:27]  You grabbed the shaft of the dick and wrapped your fingers around it.
[00:32:30]  Yeah.
[00:32:31]  Yo, you put it on your face.
[00:32:32]  He put it on his lips.
[00:32:34]  Nah, yeah.
[00:32:35]  You ain't going to make me gay.
[00:32:37]  I ain't going to make it.
[00:32:41]  I don't want to show it on your show.
[00:32:44]  Just take a gulp, bro.
[00:32:45]  Just take a gulp.
[00:32:46]  That water is very small.
[00:32:49]  Yeah, how big is that water compared to your shit?
[00:32:51]  That shit is tough.
[00:32:52]  How big is that water?
[00:32:53]  Remember what Al said he had a 10-inch dick once?
[00:32:55]  Nine and a half.
[00:32:56]  Nine and a half inch dick.
[00:32:58]  And then we just brought a six-inch dick in, and he was like, that's a decent size dick.
[00:33:02]  That's not six.
[00:33:05]  That's not six.
[00:33:09]  I got a good eye.
[00:33:10]  Y'all know.
[00:33:10]  I got a good eye.
[00:33:11]  That's a six.
[00:33:12]  You can tell how big a dick is.
[00:33:14]  I know.
[00:33:14]  I just know that's not.
[00:33:15]  But that is a six-inch dick.
[00:33:16]  It's not a six.
[00:33:17]  It's on the box.
[00:33:18]  It says six.
[00:33:19]  We literally.
[00:33:20]  Bring it in.
[00:33:22]  Get the dick.
[00:33:24]  Get the dildo.
[00:33:25]  And we need something to measure it with.
[00:33:26]  Technically, we have to blur it.
[00:33:28]  Well, Joey will measure it over there to find out the exact length of Alex's dick.
[00:33:32]  Because now Alex has confirmed that his dick is no longer than that.
[00:33:38]  It's like the OJ Glove moment.
[00:33:40]  Yes, it is.
[00:33:41]  We're about to find out.
[00:33:42]  The dick fits.
[00:33:43]  Oh, this is not good.
[00:33:45]  Yeah.
[00:33:49]  All right.
[00:33:49]  Hold on.
[00:33:50]  We got to hide it.
[00:33:51]  We got to hide it.
[00:33:52]  Okay.
[00:33:53]  Happy New Year, everybody.
[00:33:55]  That thing is like maybe five.
[00:33:57]  Yeah, that's a five-inch.
[00:33:58]  That's a five-inch.
[00:33:59]  Well, a piece of paper is eight and a half by 11.
[00:34:01]  Oh, wow.
[00:34:02]  That's a good point.
[00:34:03]  So this is where it starts.
[00:34:05]  No, you got to go, yeah.
[00:34:06]  No.
[00:34:06]  So you don't count the balls either.
[00:34:08]  Yeah, of course.
[00:34:09]  I think that's a six-inch dick.
[00:34:10]  Yeah.
[00:34:12]  Maybe five and a half.
[00:34:13]  This is 11, and you just got a little space right here.
[00:34:16]  No, no, no.
[00:34:16]  You can't count and suction.
[00:34:18]  No, you can't count the suction.
[00:34:19]  You got to count it from there on the base of the chest.
[00:34:21]  Guys, are you guys intimidated by my dick?
[00:34:23]  Honestly, a little bit.
[00:34:25]  I mean, if you have a 10-inch dick, yeah.
[00:34:26]  Sure.
[00:34:26]  Honestly, a little bit.
[00:34:27]  I'm going to be honest.
[00:34:28]  It's a weapon.
[00:34:28]  Probably everybody's dick is bigger than mine.
[00:34:30]  I'm not really intimidated by much of it.
[00:34:32]  So I just don't think that's nine inches.
[00:34:34]  I'm going to hide this one, sir.
[00:34:39]  I don't want to get demonetized.
[00:34:41]  I took one for the team.
[00:34:42]  My bad.
[00:34:43]  Sorry.
[00:34:44]  Sorry for fucking putting the show on my fucking.
[00:34:50]  My bad, dude.
[00:34:52]  Jeez.
[00:34:53]  Fucking Patriots.
[00:34:54]  Oh, my God.
[00:34:55]  You are a Patriot.
[00:34:56]  Yeah, man.
[00:34:57]  Respect.
[00:34:57]  Yo, shout out you, bro.
[00:34:59]  Yeah.
[00:35:00]  Shout out you.
[00:35:00]  Hold on.
[00:35:01]  Someone call me.
[00:35:01]  You've never looked more comfortable, bro.
[00:35:03]  Do I look taller?
[00:35:05]  I got lips in right now.
[00:35:06]  That's all.
[00:35:07]  All right, guys, let's take a break for a second.

=== Intimidated by My Dick (02:44) ===

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[00:38:21]  Thank you so much.
[00:38:22]  Peace.
[00:38:23]  What's your New Year's revolution, Al?
[00:38:26]  New Year's.
[00:38:28]  Is that what it is?
[00:38:28]  I thought you said that yesterday is that.
[00:38:31]  Y'all raising your kids in New York?
[00:38:33]  Because if so, there's a solid chance at least one of your sons ends up doing that.
[00:38:38]  All due respect.
[00:38:39]  You know what I mean?
[00:38:40]  We all do respect call our kids hypothetically gay.
[00:38:42]  But you say you're more comfortable making inappropriate jokes.
[00:38:45]  We talked about my boys changing.
[00:38:46]  Yo, which one of y'all kids is going to take some dick?
[00:38:48]  How about that?
[00:38:49]  Let's talk about it.
[00:38:50]  Damn, Al.
[00:38:51]  Yeah, with all due respect.
[00:38:53]  Let's talk about it.
[00:38:53]  I just did it because he said he's more comfortable making inappropriate jokes about his son.
[00:38:56]  So I said, well, there we go.
[00:38:58]  Yeah, I'm fine making inappropriate ones where he's a heterosexual man, not some hockey show watching.
[00:39:08]  Have you been watching this, Bob?
[00:39:09]  No, I haven't watched it.
[00:39:10]  I need to.
[00:39:11]  Sound news, everybody.
[00:39:12]  Nice, guys.
[00:39:13]  Good news.
[00:39:15]  But yeah, no, the chances of a kid being gay, I mean, you're going to love them no matter what.
[00:39:21]  You got to hit him with the Kevin Hart answer.
[00:39:23]  Did you hear?
[00:39:24]  He was in an interview.
[00:39:24]  They're like, do you want a gay kid, daughter, whatever?
[00:39:26]  He goes, I just want two healthy children.
[00:39:28]  I was like, oh, nice.
[00:39:29]  He learned from that Oscars concept.
[00:39:31]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:39:32]  But he got out of it.
[00:39:33]  It became, it went viral on Twitter.
[00:39:35]  I was like, yeah.
[00:39:36]  But it was a good answer.
[00:39:36]  It was very good.
[00:39:37]  I mean, is that what you want at the end of the day?
[00:39:38]  Exactly, right?
[00:39:39]  I want two healthy kids.
[00:39:40]  That's all.
[00:39:41]  100%.
[00:39:41]  And I think the healthiest thing.
[00:39:42]  Let's go to this video.
[00:39:44]  What is this?
[00:39:45]  What is this, Miles?
[00:39:46]  Do you guys want to watch a clip from the hockey show?
[00:39:49]  Can you explain what the show is and why it's going on?
[00:39:51]  Why is this like a big deal?
[00:39:52]  Why do Stray Girls love this so much?
[00:39:53]  All right, Stray Women, first off, love this show.
[00:39:55]  I don't know why.
[00:39:56]  Is it based on a slut novel?
[00:39:57]  It is based on a slut novel.
[00:39:59]  Okay, well, that's why.
[00:40:00]  It was a show that was a book, and then it was a show that got optioned in like Canada.
[00:40:03]  It was sort of a low-budget, like little show based on the book.
[00:40:06]  Then HBO picked it up in America, and it went fucking nuts.
[00:40:10]  Bonkers, unintended, over the break.
[00:40:12]  And it's about two gay hockey players who secretly are lovers.
[00:40:17]  There is a Russian man on the right here that would be the, if you had to sort of like, I don't even want to give them to an NHL player, but it would be like the two top best players.
[00:40:26]  I know you're going to say.
[00:40:27]  Yep, there's two of them, and I just went a while ago.
[00:40:30]  He's going to say, he didn't want to disrespect him, but we're not saying he's gay, but he's like the Alex Ovechkin type.
[00:40:35]  Another one would be Crosby.
[00:40:36]  And then there would be Sydney Crosby.
[00:40:38]  Like Alex Ovechkin's like the bad boy, the rough guy, or whatever.
[00:40:41]  He's like a badass Alex Ovechkin.
[00:40:42]  And then Sidney Crosby is like kind of like a bad guy.
[00:40:43]  It's just a Russian and I don't want to fuck with Russians.
[00:40:46]  No idea who these people you're talking about.
[00:40:48]  But we get it.
[00:40:49]  We get it.
[00:40:50]  You're not white.
[00:40:51]  No, I want to get some context.
[00:40:53]  Everyone knows you're not white, bro.
[00:40:55]  Can I get some context?
[00:40:56]  I want to enjoy the story.
[00:40:57]  I literally gave you context right after.
[00:40:59]  Everyone knows you're not white out.
[00:41:01]  But when he's dressed like this, he is white.
[00:41:02]  You say the N-word so much when you're not with us.
[00:41:05]  You say it all the time.
[00:41:06]  You're not white.
[00:41:07]  Your son's gay, bro.
[00:41:08]  You're so gay.
[00:41:13]  It is true, though.
[00:41:14]  If he does record a podcast at WTF, there is a very high likelihood.
[00:41:20]  Likelihood.
[00:41:20]  Likelihood, they're all over the place.
[00:41:23]  Popping up everywhere.
[00:41:24]  Okay, what is this?
[00:41:24]  What is this clip?
[00:41:25]  This clip is they're just hanging out.
[00:41:26]  They're playing video games with the boys, just like you guys do with your friends.
[00:41:30]  I imagine this is a common situation you run into, correct?
[00:41:33]  Yeah, of course, dude.
[00:41:34]  Me and the homies.
[00:41:34]  The boys are hanging out.
[00:41:35]  It's a long clip.
[00:41:36]  A guy on the left never played a video game in his life.
[00:41:39]  Also, the hockey team is called the Metros, which I think is a hilarious.
[00:41:42]  Oh, come on.
[00:41:43]  That's fun.
[00:41:44]  Get to the fucking.
[00:41:45]  Oh, do you want to?
[00:41:46]  What are we doing?
[00:41:46]  We're watching the whole show.
[00:41:48]  Oh, that was crazy.
[00:41:52]  What did it do?
[00:41:54]  He was doing this little joint right here.
[00:41:58]  You guys wanted the point.
[00:41:59]  I'm telling you, you got to watch the.
[00:42:01]  It's slow burn.
[00:42:04]  He wants to warm us up.
[00:42:06]  What's he doing?
[00:42:08]  What is he doing?
[00:42:09]  Yeah, and your son will find out about it.
[00:42:14]  It's a fucking animal.
[00:42:15]  Y'all with don't do respecting.
[00:42:19]  Who's that one go with that with all dudes?
[00:42:21]  I apologize.
[00:42:22]  I don't want respect.
[00:42:23]  Your mom's a slut.
[00:42:25]  You're fucking up.
[00:42:29]  Yeah, that's right.
[00:42:30]  My mom deserves some good dude.
[00:42:32]  That's OD.
[00:42:32]  My mom deserves some good dick.
[00:42:35]  Just like this guy's about to get.
[00:42:37]  On the phone, he just said, I'm not going to touch you, but if you get hard, things get to happen.
[00:42:43]  This is like if someone has my nicotine pouches, I'm trying to get them back.
[00:42:45]  Son, it's so sensual.
[00:42:47]  I do the same thing.
[00:42:48]  That's the hardest part of the show.
[00:42:49]  It's the sexuality, dude.
[00:42:51]  Oh, oh, he's great.
[00:42:55]  I can't even react to this shit because I got upset.
[00:42:58]  People got upset at me last time we were watching the champions show.
[00:43:01]  What was the movie called?
[00:43:02]  Warriors?
[00:43:03]  Challengers.
[00:43:03]  Challengers.
[00:43:07]  No.
[00:43:08]  Bro.
[00:43:09]  No, no, no, no.
[00:43:11]  It's fire, dude.
[00:43:12]  Come on.
[00:43:12]  Nah, nah, nah, nah.
[00:43:14]  Why is he fucking awesome at it?
[00:43:17]  What the hell?
[00:43:18]  Oh, yo, yo.
[00:43:20]  Oh, my man.
[00:43:21]  He's hungry.
[00:43:22]  Damn.
[00:43:23]  Enthusiastic.
[00:43:24]  You know, that's Soviet shit.
[00:43:25]  Yeah.
[00:43:27]  He doesn't understand the concept of no.
[00:43:28]  That's fire, dude.
[00:43:29]  Look at this.
[00:43:30]  This is crazy.
[00:43:32]  This isn't even a crazy scene.
[00:43:33]  What do you mean it's not a crazy scene?
[00:43:36]  What do you mean it's not a crazy scene?
[00:43:37]  He's blowing the other guy on national television, Miles.
[00:43:40]  You know how you show your boys your apartment, right?
[00:43:42]  This is what you do.
[00:43:43]  You go, hey, I'm a rich hockey player, you're a rich hockey player.
[00:43:45]  Let's look at our apartments together.
[00:43:46]  So, this is the whole show as they just hook up with each other for the first four episodes.
[00:43:50]  It's pretty hookup.
[00:43:51]  And then the last two, you sort of get some storyline.
[00:43:54]  And so, why do straight girls like this shit?
[00:43:56]  Dude, it makes straight girls horny.
[00:43:59]  I don't know why.
[00:44:00]  I don't know why.
[00:44:02]  Sound effect, right?
[00:44:04]  What was that sound effect?
[00:44:06]  You got to drop an octave sometime to explain how horny it is.
[00:44:10]  I like the apartment.
[00:44:11]  Open, open kitchen.
[00:44:12]  I love the layout.
[00:44:14]  What a nice little fire.
[00:44:15]  Yeah, right.
[00:44:16]  The nice sliding doors.
[00:44:17]  Fireplace.
[00:44:18]  I don't love the fireplace.
[00:44:19]  It's a little too sterile, but it is nice.
[00:44:22]  The space is open.
[00:44:23]  Just having a fireplace?
[00:44:24]  It's not cozy enough.
[00:44:26]  I agree.
[00:44:27]  Oh, but it's about to get a lot warmer.
[00:44:29]  Oh, man.
[00:44:30]  You know, I lived in New York long enough that whatever.
[00:44:32]  This is the dude's making out.
[00:44:34]  Kind of the wide angle.
[00:44:35]  See, dude's making out.
[00:44:36]  No.
[00:44:36]  That's come on.
[00:44:37]  Oh!
[00:44:41]  This shit is like a jump scare.
[00:44:45]  Nice.
[00:44:50]  Come on, bro.
[00:44:52]  This is the scary I ever seen in my life.
[00:44:57]  Brother glasses, bro.
[00:44:59]  Oh, my God.
[00:45:00]  This is Hills Have Eyes.
[00:45:02]  It just happens like that.
[00:45:04]  28 days later.
[00:45:07]  They shoot it like a horror.
[00:45:08]  Is that the idea?
[00:45:09]  They added like a horror film.
[00:45:12]  That was nuts.
[00:45:13]  The other guy shows the other apartment.
[00:45:15]  Do you do it missionary like that?
[00:45:17]  You junior boys.
[00:45:18]  Why do you want to girls?
[00:45:19]  No, because girls have butts too.
[00:45:22]  You know what I mean?
[00:45:23]  But can they go even in missionary?
[00:45:25]  Yeah, they're very innovative, these folks.
[00:45:27]  Hold on.
[00:45:27]  Is this going to just be the same thing again?
[00:45:29]  No.
[00:45:30]  It would never, dude.
[00:45:33]  It would never be the same exact thing.
[00:45:36]  Oh, God.
[00:45:36]  No, this one's got way more buildup.
[00:45:38]  It's way more sensual.
[00:45:39]  I'm built up.
[00:45:41]  Fucking really built up right now.
[00:45:43]  Oh, not the breathing.
[00:45:44]  By the breathing, bro.
[00:45:45]  The ASMR breathing.
[00:45:47]  The whole show is that.
[00:45:48]  It's a lot of sound effects.
[00:45:50]  A fully.
[00:45:52]  And are the actors straight?
[00:45:54]  That's a great question, dude.
[00:45:56]  Because that's fucking acting.
[00:45:58]  What they was doing just before, if they're straight, that's acting.
[00:46:02]  That shit resting.
[00:46:03]  Golden globes.
[00:46:04]  No, you got to, bro.
[00:46:06]  Because Al is still in a fucking comatose state after what he just.
[00:46:10]  He's hole in his head.
[00:46:11]  Like, you got to be.
[00:46:12]  Al, you got to do it without the glasses on me.
[00:46:15]  The glasses a little bit.
[00:46:18]  I've been able to just peek at it.
[00:46:20]  But yeah, you think you could act like this?
[00:46:22]  You're in movies?
[00:46:24]  Could I act like that?
[00:46:26]  Of course, bro.
[00:46:27]  Are you kidding me?
[00:46:28]  Yeah, method.
[00:46:29]  Yeah.
[00:46:29]  I could do it.
[00:46:30]  I could get dome.
[00:46:34]  Oh.
[00:46:35]  Oh.
[00:46:36]  This is how it's edited.
[00:46:37]  Yes, there's a lot of people.
[00:46:38]  A lot of jump times.
[00:46:40]  That jump wasn't that crazy.
[00:46:42]  Well, this is the first time.
[00:46:44]  Don't they need lube or something?
[00:46:45]  Give me the context of the show.
[00:46:46]  This is the first time they hook up.
[00:46:48]  Okay, question.
[00:46:49]  Don't they need Lu?
[00:46:50]  Ew, wait, I said, wait, shit.
[00:46:58]  Didn't I take that?
[00:47:00]  He had a bubble on him, though.
[00:47:01]  My mother's got a bubble.
[00:47:03]  Yo, run that back 10 seconds because he kind of got a fucking thing on him.
[00:47:07]  Oh, no.
[00:47:09]  Nah, he does.
[00:47:10]  That's like the daughter from Landman.
[00:47:12]  The daughter from Landman and him got the same cheeks.
[00:47:15]  Okay, there's one.
[00:47:17]  You wouldn't get behind that, Al, if there was no balls coming back at you.
[00:47:22]  If there was no balls coming back at you, you wouldn't get behind that, Alright.
[00:47:27]  Objectively, he's right.
[00:47:28]  I gotta be honest.
[00:47:29]  Yo, he got a good butt.
[00:47:31]  You can't deny it.
[00:47:32]  Especially for a white.
[00:47:34]  Oh, why is he playing his dad?
[00:47:36]  Wait, they like that?
[00:47:37]  Yeah, that is fascinating.
[00:47:39]  That guy's straight.
[00:47:42]  That guy's straight.
[00:47:44]  Just wait.
[00:47:45]  He's straight.
[00:47:46]  Which one?
[00:47:46]  The guy.
[00:47:47]  The guy playing with the tip.
[00:47:48]  Look at his laugh.
[00:47:50]  Nah.
[00:47:51]  No way.
[00:47:52]  He's doing that.
[00:47:53]  He's doing the perkless.
[00:47:54]  There is no way.
[00:47:56]  Oh, my God.
[00:47:57]  I'm farting.
[00:47:58]  If you bring my legs up like that, I'm farting, bro.
[00:48:02]  I'm sorry.
[00:48:02]  What happens when you pull out that thing?
[00:48:06]  What happens when you pull out that thing, dude?
[00:48:08]  Secrets.
[00:48:10]  This is a hockey movie?
[00:48:12]  Yeah.
[00:48:12]  What the fuck?
[00:48:14]  Six episodes.
[00:48:15]  Is the show actually good or is it?
[00:48:16]  Do they need lube, guys?
[00:48:20]  Why are you watching?
[00:48:22]  Oh, no.
[00:48:23]  Wait, well, this is more traditional way.
[00:48:26]  That's how you would imagine it.
[00:48:28]  This is old-fashioned, conservative gay sex.
[00:48:30]  Conservative gay sex, yeah.
[00:48:32]  Oh, no, he's grabbing my pillow.
[00:48:34]  Now he's grabbing out of it.
[00:48:37]  Damn.
[00:48:37]  What the miles?
[00:48:39]  All right.
[00:48:39]  All that to say, Miles.
[00:48:41]  Yes.
[00:48:41]  Why are you watching this?
[00:48:43]  For the show, honestly.
[00:48:44]  For the show.
[00:48:44]  For the pod.
[00:48:45]  So I could bring that up for you.
[00:48:46]  One more.
[00:48:47]  So, how does it end?
[00:48:48]  Can I show you one more thing?
[00:48:50]  This is one more clip from the hockey movie.
[00:48:51]  Yeah.
[00:48:52]  This is from a.
[00:48:53]  Oh, this is hilarious.
[00:48:55]  Trembling October 1st, guys.
[00:48:57]  Yeah.
[00:49:03]  Oh!
[00:49:09]  Yo!
[00:49:18]  Yo, shout out!
[00:49:19]  My father!
[00:49:20]  Shout out IMC!
[00:49:23]  Stop trying to game on a son, Marie.
[00:49:26]  Stop trying to game on his son.
[00:49:28]  Let us have a chance.
[00:49:31]  I spent so much time editing that last time.
[00:49:32]  How did you do that with Sora?
[00:49:34]  Oh, so much AI.
[00:49:35]  That's incredible.
[00:49:36]  The funniest thing is, you have to upload all the photos of you guys, and then I have to go make them kiss.
[00:49:41]  And they go, no, we can't do that.
[00:49:42]  And I go, they're fake characters for a fake movie, and I really need them to kiss to sell this to a studio.
[00:49:47]  And they go, yeah, sure.
[00:49:48]  Here you go.
[00:49:50]  I mean, that was incredible.
[00:49:51]  I mean, that's wild.
[00:49:52]  It's a real Bender's trailer that I just truncated down and tossed some more shit on.
[00:49:57]  Oh, my God.
[00:49:57]  I know we're supposed to hate AI and it's horrible and we hate it, but the ability to make things gay that aren't.
[00:50:03]  Okay, what the fuck is that?
[00:50:04]  I never got to add this thing to the clip.
[00:50:07]  I just wanted to show that there's more.
[00:50:10]  I feel like this is just you got to see that.
[00:50:12]  That is actually phenomenal.
[00:50:14]  That looks like me.
[00:50:15]  That shit is crazy.
[00:50:16]  We killed it.
[00:50:17]  Yo.
[00:50:18]  I mean, the sensuality is really beautiful.
[00:50:20]  Oh, number seven.
[00:50:20]  That's beautiful.
[00:50:21]  Yeah, dude.
[00:50:22]  Oh, look at that.
[00:50:23]  True love.
[00:50:24]  There's one more.
[00:50:25]  Jeez, please.
[00:50:25]  No.
[00:50:26]  You guys saw that?
[00:50:26]  One more.
[00:50:27]  You guys saw SVP?
[00:50:29]  This is phenomenal.
[00:50:30]  You don't have Al doing anything?
[00:50:33]  Damn it.
[00:50:34]  Do you see SVP thing?
[00:50:35]  Oh, yeah, Miles.
[00:50:36]  Wait, what do you have from SVP?
[00:50:38]  Oh, this is the New Year's countdown?
[00:50:39]  Yeah.
[00:50:41]  That's hot.
[00:50:42]  Happy New Year.
[00:50:43]  Mamdani.
[00:50:44]  Protester.
[00:50:45]  This is a phenomenal pick.
[00:50:49]  What do we got?
[00:50:50]  Come on.
[00:50:53]  Yo, why do I have to kiss two different guys?
[00:50:57]  Why couldn't it have been Shifty and Alex or Joey and Alex?
[00:51:01]  Why do I have double dicks?
[00:51:03]  Yeah, and Miles got none, except for on New Year's.
[00:51:06]  Oh, my God.
[00:51:07]  You guys are really trying to make my son gay, man.
[00:51:09]  I did get footage from Miles and David on New Year's.
[00:51:11]  No, press play right now.
[00:51:13]  I don't have anything.
[00:51:14]  No, Joey has it.
[00:51:15]  Joey, press play and edit it.
[00:51:17]  Go and do whatever you need.
[00:51:18]  Sora that shit and make it as gay as I'm doing.
[00:51:20]  This is not Miles.
[00:51:21]  I'm surprised you didn't get the scene of him and I'm not sure.
[00:51:22]  This is not Sora.
[00:51:25]  I tried finding that scene.
[00:51:27]  That is screwing.
[00:51:28]  Yo, look at the arm lock.
[00:51:30]  Look at the house.
[00:51:37]  Yo, you know what's crazy?
[00:51:38]  Daddy, take your glasses off.
[00:51:39]  It's crazy without the glasses.
[00:51:41]  I'm telling you.
[00:51:42]  Let it in.
[00:51:43]  Let it in your eyeballs.
[00:51:44]  Nah, that shit is better.
[00:51:45]  It's like 3D.
[00:51:48]  Coming at you, dude.
[00:51:50]  Oh, my God.
[00:51:51]  What is this?
[00:51:52]  What is this?
[00:51:53]  That's a nuts ball.
[00:51:54]  He threw a nut at you.
[00:51:55]  Damn.
[00:51:55]  Bro, that's crazy.
[00:51:58]  What prompt did you use?
[00:51:59]  Mine wouldn't do that.
[00:52:00]  No, the problem.
[00:52:01]  Oh, whoa.
[00:52:03]  That's crazy.
[00:52:04]  Well, I coincidentally found the first frame, which is a real photograph.
[00:52:07]  Let the record show.
[00:52:08]  So if you go to the first frame, this is what actually happened.
[00:52:11]  Yeah, that's real.
[00:52:13]  He's wrestling me.
[00:52:15]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:52:16]  That's how it starts.
[00:52:17]  That's how it starts, dude.
[00:52:18]  It's always a beautiful 2000 square foot of podcasts.
[00:52:20]  Y'all are kind of dick-to-dick right there.
[00:52:22]  Yeah.
[00:52:23]  And now this is where it goes fake right here.
[00:52:27]  God.
[00:52:27]  So I had to add a little bit to the end.
[00:52:29]  The way I did it, because I said the same thing.
[00:52:30]  I was like, can you make these two guys kiss?
[00:52:32]  And they were like, no, we can't do that.
[00:52:33]  And I was like, this is the last photo I have of me and my husband.
[00:52:36]  Please.
[00:52:36]  Just one final embrace.
[00:52:37]  You have to.
[00:52:38]  Now he's dead.
[00:52:39]  We have to beg.
[00:52:40]  And I was like, well, if it's for your husband.
[00:52:42]  Wow.
[00:52:43]  You have to like beg and trick these AIs into doing gay shit.
[00:52:47]  Yeah.
[00:52:47]  AIs are black.
[00:52:48]  That's excellent.
[00:52:49]  You got to trick them in some gay shit.
[00:52:51]  That's all.
[00:52:52]  Chat EBT.
[00:52:52]  You got to make them measure your dick.
[00:52:55]  That's from another pod.
[00:52:55]  That's from another pod.
[00:52:57]  I saw that joke for another pod.
[00:52:58]  Which pod?
[00:52:59]  I want to see who's.
[00:53:00]  Oh, I don't.
[00:53:01]  Maybe it's Chris Joseph Nose on.
[00:53:02]  I don't remember.
[00:53:03]  Oh, my God.
[00:53:04]  That's unbelievable.
[00:53:05]  Chat EBT.
[00:53:06]  Unbelievable.
[00:53:07]  Shout out to whoever said that.
[00:53:08]  Phenomenal.
[00:53:09]  I didn't want to steal that joke.
[00:53:10]  Phenomenal.
[00:53:11]  Isn't AI beautiful, dude?
[00:53:12]  Oh, my God.
[00:53:13]  No, we hate AI.
[00:53:14]  Oh, yeah, yeah, we hate it.
[00:53:15]  We hate AI.
[00:53:15]  Fucking fuck AI.
[00:53:17]  So not funny and weird.
[00:53:18]  And all this AI slop.
[00:53:20]  Oh, look at that slop.
[00:53:21]  Look at that fucking slop.

=== Making Two Guys Kiss (07:54) ===

[00:53:22]  Look at that.
[00:53:22]  Enough.
[00:53:23]  That shit is crazy.
[00:53:25]  That's crazy.
[00:53:26]  But I don't even think that's AI.
[00:53:27]  How long does it take to make these videos?
[00:53:29]  That's not AI.
[00:53:30]  A matter of seconds or a matter of minutes?
[00:53:31]  Probably 45 seconds.
[00:53:32]  Minute, maybe.
[00:53:33]  Can you make several of Al kissing other men?
[00:53:36]  Why?
[00:53:36]  I can try.
[00:53:37]  Wow.
[00:53:38]  Why are you mad at me, right?
[00:53:41]  Stop, man.
[00:53:42]  Why are you hurting my feelings?
[00:53:44]  Why are you attacking my character?
[00:53:46]  The picture is really easy to make.
[00:53:47]  It's actually taking the picture to the video.
[00:53:49]  Why are you mad at me, bro?
[00:53:54]  I have a couple Benders questions for you.
[00:53:56]  Not Benders.
[00:53:57]  The other gay hockey show.
[00:54:01]  He's flustered, right?
[00:54:02]  He did Rival.
[00:54:03]  He did Rival.
[00:54:04]  Bro, he's bricked up.
[00:54:05]  Yo, Benders is a much better name for our gay hockey show.
[00:54:10]  Wait, so you watched this show for real?
[00:54:12]  I watched episodes of this show.
[00:54:14]  I watched a few scenes here and there because I was like, I got to see what the hype's about.
[00:54:17]  And also, I think it'd be really fun to show you.
[00:54:18]  I watched episodes of this show and I watched a few scenes here and there.
[00:54:23]  Which one is it?
[00:54:24]  I did not watch the whole season.
[00:54:25]  I missed the first two episodes.
[00:54:26]  Now, can we get a girl in here and just ask them why if this is hot in the way that like maybe us seeing two hot chicks, you know, hook up is hot.
[00:54:34]  That's what I'm guessing.
[00:54:35]  Okay.
[00:54:35]  Is that the either?
[00:54:38]  Can we just ask him?
[00:54:39]  We just made it straight and then Al immediately understands it.
[00:54:43]  Oh, man.
[00:54:43]  More pussy on the softball show where they make it.
[00:54:46]  That sounds cool.
[00:54:47]  Well, maybe not softball, right?
[00:54:49]  Because we want to see.
[00:54:50]  But what if they're hot softball players?
[00:54:52]  No, no, no.
[00:54:53]  Like L-word.
[00:54:54]  Remember that show?
[00:54:55]  Yes, vaguely on Showtime.
[00:54:58]  Yeah.
[00:54:59]  Like, I don't even remember anything about the show other than there's lesbians and then you'll have some soft core porn shit like that.
[00:55:06]  And now they're just a sport.
[00:55:08]  Okay, here's the thing.
[00:55:09]  They would just, Alex, I don't know if you count because Alex.
[00:55:14]  Yeah, you don't count.
[00:55:15]  That's true.
[00:55:15]  My straight roommates are jerking off to this.
[00:55:18]  Straight roommates, meaning females.
[00:55:21]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:55:21]  Hot boyfriends love this show.
[00:55:23]  Okay, now.
[00:55:24]  Nah, I'd be mad if my girls watched this show.
[00:55:27]  So let our girls come.
[00:55:31]  This is fantastic.
[00:55:32]  Let Alexander.
[00:55:34]  You got to watch another nigga's.
[00:55:35]  Nah.
[00:55:37]  Keep going.
[00:55:39]  I'm saying, like, work through all his feelings because I understand what you're saying.
[00:55:42]  Like, what is it about getting turned on by other dudes and then you're getting turned on by gay shit on top of that?
[00:55:48]  Nah, and then you're with me.
[00:55:54]  Nah, nah, nah.
[00:55:55]  Can't do this show.
[00:55:56]  What do you see about me?
[00:55:58]  Yeah, Jessically, you're back there.
[00:55:59]  That's crazy.
[00:56:00]  Yeah.
[00:56:00]  That's crazy.
[00:56:01]  And Al has zero gay tendencies at all, so I don't understand why you want to straighten it.
[00:56:05]  But that generation likes soft men.
[00:56:07]  That is true.
[00:56:08]  Do those men look soft to you?
[00:56:09]  Yes.
[00:56:10]  They take it back.
[00:56:11]  No, I don't know.
[00:56:12]  They're kind of taking it in the most masculine way.
[00:56:16]  They are athletes.
[00:56:17]  They're athletes with huge arms.
[00:56:19]  And the way that they were getting after it.
[00:56:20]  Yeah, it's extremely fun.
[00:56:22]  It started slow and sensual.
[00:56:23]  That was some sense.
[00:56:24]  But then once they were in the fucking, they became guys.
[00:56:27]  Yeah.
[00:56:31]  Okay, okay, hold on.
[00:56:32]  So guys is so good.
[00:56:33]  So, okay, I understand this.
[00:56:36]  Okay.
[00:56:36]  So, the only so this is what I'm wondering with the women here.
[00:56:39]  What's wrong with the world?
[00:56:40]  What, what are you, who are you seeing yourself as when you're watching it?
[00:56:46]  See, that's the fun part.
[00:56:47]  It's like a new thing that we're like part of it, I guess.
[00:56:51]  Okay.
[00:56:52]  And you like, I mean, obviously, the Asian guy is the woman.
[00:56:56]  May I get it, but I see your point.
[00:57:01]  Because I watch the show.
[00:57:02]  It's the dynamic.
[00:57:03]  Okay, more context.
[00:57:03]  More context to the question.
[00:57:05]  Okay.
[00:57:05]  So if we're watching traditional porn, we're imagining ourselves as the guy.
[00:57:11]  The girl is doing the things to the guy.
[00:57:14]  Yes.
[00:57:14]  Okay.
[00:57:15]  Yes.
[00:57:15]  We don't really watch like girl-on-girl porn.
[00:57:17]  I don't want to speak for you guys, but like just girls is for girls.
[00:57:20]  People do.
[00:57:21]  But girls do, not guys.
[00:57:22]  Like, I don't know any guys who are like, I need to find something to drink off to, and it's just two girls petting each other or whatever.
[00:57:26]  Yeah.
[00:57:26]  With girls, if you're watching two guys go at it, you're watching a guy blow another guy.
[00:57:33]  Right.
[00:57:33]  You're not imagining you're the guy getting blown.
[00:57:36]  Nor am I imagining giving a blowjob.
[00:57:38]  It's more of just like a feeling.
[00:57:40]  It's like it's just a part of this.
[00:57:42]  It's just hot.
[00:57:43]  To be a guy.
[00:57:46]  Yeah, but also like you're, I don't, that's not really.
[00:57:49]  They're acting kind of masculine.
[00:57:52]  What happened?
[00:57:53]  Yeah, I don't know.
[00:57:54]  They're all in birth control.
[00:57:55]  They prefer feminized men.
[00:57:56]  Look it up.
[00:57:57]  Ooh.
[00:57:58]  But are those men feminine?
[00:58:00]  And who invented birth control?
[00:58:01]  Exactly.
[00:58:02]  Yes.
[00:58:02]  The Rocky Stars.
[00:58:04]  Whoa, why?
[00:58:07]  Stop trying to think because then we'll get two million views.
[00:58:10]  Stop.
[00:58:11]  Stop trying to make this the biggest podcast we've ever done.
[00:58:13]  What the heck is wrong with you?
[00:58:14]  What are you doing?
[00:58:16]  Talking about the one thing that gets views on the internet right now.
[00:58:19]  Calm down.
[00:58:20]  Don't let us start talking about Argentina and Wildbart.
[00:58:23]  Okay.
[00:58:26]  So you're not visualizing yourself as one of them.
[00:58:30]  No, it's not so simple.
[00:58:31]  It's just like, oh my God, this is a good thing.
[00:58:32]  Damn, damn.
[00:58:33]  That felt like a shot.
[00:58:34]  Yeah, that was crazy.
[00:58:34]  Like, yeah, we watched porn and shit.
[00:58:37]  Sophisticated the way we watch gay.
[00:58:40]  To be honest, yeah, it didn't come kind of simple, right?
[00:58:42]  Like, oh, that looks too small for that to go in there.
[00:58:44]  Oh, it got in there?
[00:58:45]  Oh, okay, Phil.
[00:58:47]  More of a science.
[00:58:49]  Okay.
[00:58:50]  Okay.
[00:58:50]  So again, what is hot about it?
[00:58:53]  What isn't hot about it is my question.
[00:58:56]  Like, I'm just like, I'm in a different world where I'm like, that is good.
[00:59:00]  Like, my friends are barking at the TV.
[00:59:03]  Really?
[00:59:04]  So then, would you be with a guy that's bi?
[00:59:07]  Would I?
[00:59:08]  I mean, yeah, I have.
[00:59:10]  Wait.
[00:59:15]  I don't know that.
[00:59:16]  He dropped a hand.
[00:59:17]  I thought it was the most.
[00:59:19]  I just don't get it.
[00:59:20]  I just don't get it.
[00:59:21]  She thought he didn't want to check me.
[00:59:24]  Oh, well, what about this?
[00:59:26]  And he's like, yeah, I'm doing that every day.
[00:59:28]  That's fair.
[00:59:28]  Okay, she's pants.
[00:59:30]  You remember she's pants.
[00:59:32]  She's pants.
[00:59:32]  That's right.
[00:59:33]  She can't be pants.
[00:59:33]  All that shit is.
[00:59:34]  What are you?
[00:59:35]  What is pants?
[00:59:36]  Tan is a woman that loved the colour.
[00:59:39]  That sounds kind of pan, to be honest with you.
[00:59:41]  No.
[00:59:41]  Is it pants or pans?
[00:59:43]  Pans.
[00:59:44]  It's Pam.
[00:59:44]  It's Pam.
[00:59:45]  Pans.
[00:59:46]  Pam.
[00:59:47]  Pam.
[00:59:47]  Pam sexual.
[00:59:48]  Okay.
[00:59:49]  So, okay, pansexuality is a sexuality.
[00:59:52]  That sounds exactly like what you just said.
[00:59:54]  Yeah, this is you.
[00:59:55]  How are you denying that?
[00:59:56]  Well, we don't want to put labels on anybody.
[00:59:58]  I do.
[00:59:58]  Listen, if you want to understand it.
[01:00:01]  We got to figure this shit out.
[01:00:03]  There's rules.
[01:00:04]  Okay, that was nail polish.
[01:00:09]  Guys, Pete Rose, Bernie Man.
[01:00:13]  Now, if we really want to throw it back to the 1970s, Tanya's going to get on that mic and shut this whole shit down.
[01:00:19]  So we have to hold one second.
[01:00:21]  Don't let it get that much just yet.
[01:00:22]  Okay.
[01:00:23]  So, just okay, just out of curiosity, there was a point in time, there was a point in time where, at least when I was growing up, I think if a girl knew that a guy had done something with another guy, maybe even in the past, they were not as attracted to that guy.
[01:00:38]  And you're saying, like, in your generation, that is kind of.
[01:00:41]  I'm kind of an outlier with my friends.
[01:00:44]  Like, my sister, like, would never hook up with a bad guy.
[01:00:46]  That's like a rule she has.
[01:00:47]  Well, I didn't even bring that up.
[01:00:49]  Some people have that.
[01:00:51]  I like how you're saying sucking a dick is the same as being black.
[01:00:56]  No, she said bye, guys.
[01:01:00]  What do you mean?
[01:01:01]  Listen, black guy.
[01:01:05]  I thought you just brought up your sister never dated a black guy.
[01:01:08]  And none of you guys battled.
[01:01:12]  I said my guy.
[01:01:14]  I thought you said black eye.
[01:01:15]  And we wouldn't bat it on.

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[01:03:40]  Now let's get back to the show.
[01:03:41]  I want to understand the world we're all living in, the world that we're raising children in.
[01:03:44]  Yes, of course.
[01:03:45]  Okay.
[01:03:46]  And there's no judgment.
[01:03:47]  There's no adjustment.
[01:03:48]  We're moving to this world.
[01:03:52]  We're moving to Greenland.
[01:03:54]  Okay.
[01:03:55]  Okay.
[01:03:55]  So if a guy was like, yeah, you know, I've hooked up with some dudes, whatever, like that, but I also like chicks.
[01:04:00]  There's no, there's no knock at all.
[01:04:04]  No, I'd be like, great.
[01:04:06]  I'm fucking a gay guy.
[01:04:07]  That's cool.
[01:04:07]  Oh, but you also see him as gay.
[01:04:09]  Yeah.
[01:04:09]  I mean, I work here.
[01:04:12]  That's a good point.
[01:04:13]  That's a good point.
[01:04:14]  That is a good thing.
[01:04:15]  That's a point deflection.
[01:04:17]  She masked her own closed-mindedness for a second and put it on us.
[01:04:19]  Don't do that.
[01:04:21]  Jesus.
[01:04:22]  That was just.
[01:04:23]  That's you.
[01:04:23]  Okay.
[01:04:24]  Okay.
[01:04:24]  Hold on now.
[01:04:25]  You see the world properly in one way.
[01:04:29]  Okay.
[01:04:29]  I agree.
[01:04:30]  I can see things as gay the way you guys do.
[01:04:32]  I just don't see it as a negative.
[01:04:34]  But wait, we don't see it as negative.
[01:04:35]  We don't see it as we don't.
[01:04:36]  Well, because we don't hook up with them no matter what.
[01:04:38]  So if somebody's gay or straight, it doesn't matter to us because we're not attracted to them.
[01:04:42]  Yeah.
[01:04:42]  You're thrilled your son is gay.
[01:04:45]  I wouldn't be thrilled if he was straight or gay.
[01:04:48]  Good.
[01:04:48]  Yeah.
[01:04:50]  Being thrilled he's gay, I feel like means there's something wrong with being straight.
[01:04:53]  And I don't think there's anything wrong with being straight.
[01:04:54]  It's kind of performative.
[01:04:55]  It seems performative.
[01:04:57]  This is the performative liberalism that I think rubs maybe people from our generation the wrong way, where you're like so stoked, you're almost like pushing it.
[01:05:04]  Where it's like, well, if you actually think it's fine, then you're just excited that he's a good person.
[01:05:08]  That's what I would be excited if he was a good person.
[01:05:10]  That was such a woke answer.
[01:05:11]  I'm really impressed.
[01:05:12]  I think y'all woke.
[01:05:13]  Y'all don't realize that we're the real woke ones soon, dude.
[01:05:16]  He's fucking lived.
[01:05:17]  You're going to realize where do we woke from?
[01:05:18]  I also grew up in a dance family, guys.
[01:05:20]  You guys just found out about gays.
[01:05:22]  My neighbor died of AIDS.
[01:05:24]  Okay?
[01:05:25]  Like, this is brand new for y'all.
[01:05:28]  We've been on this gay shit.
[01:05:29]  You know, that's actually the series finale of me.
[01:05:35]  And benders.
[01:05:37]  I don't think we made it to the series finale.
[01:05:40]  Cancel.
[01:05:41]  He cut it.
[01:05:41]  Okay.
[01:05:42]  So, so, so, okay, just so we understand it.
[01:05:44]  So it doesn't affect it at all.
[01:05:46]  And guys are more confident sharing these things because there might have been a time when we were growing up where if a guy did do some gay shit and then they're like, I don't really kind of want to do that.
[01:05:52]  They would never share it with a girl because they'd be concerned that a girl would judge him.
[01:05:56]  Yeah.
[01:05:56]  I think bi men feel like the most prejudiced.
[01:05:59]  Like they feel like people aren't into their whole vibe.
[01:06:02]  Because it's like engaging.
[01:06:04]  You're not straight enough for the straights.
[01:06:07]  Not gay enough for the game.
[01:06:08]  Like being in huge biomen.
[01:06:11]  You often hear that from black biracials.
[01:06:13]  Yes, it's like you're not black enough for the black community.
[01:06:15]  You're not white enough for the white community.
[01:06:17]  So you're kind of in the middle.
[01:06:18]  I'm not going to speak on the black community.
[01:06:21]  I'll give you an example.
[01:06:22]  Like you worked in this office.
[01:06:24]  Exactly.
[01:06:25]  This white office where we throw around the top.
[01:06:28]  How are we a white office?
[01:06:28]  Like, who's white here?
[01:06:29]  Besides me, I don't know what.
[01:06:32]  But the who's white?
[01:06:37]  Like, look around.
[01:06:38]  He's Puerto Rican.
[01:06:39]  He can't be Puerto Rican.
[01:06:40]  Shifty's Mexican.
[01:06:41]  He can't be Puerto Rican.
[01:06:44]  Shifty's Mexican.
[01:06:45]  He speaks Spanish.
[01:06:46]  He's Indian.
[01:06:47]  Shifty.
[01:06:48]  Dave is African.
[01:06:50]  You guys are African.
[01:06:53]  They're from the continent of Africa.
[01:06:57]  Al, can I tell you something very honest?
[01:07:00]  This is the thing I noticed.
[01:07:02]  White people don't think Jewish people are white.
[01:07:04]  We think they're white.
[01:07:06]  And Jewish people are like, we're white.
[01:07:08]  And white people are like, no, you're not.
[01:07:10]  This is a very funny thing.
[01:07:12]  They're interracial, like the same.
[01:07:14]  They don't.
[01:07:15]  We're like, no, y'all are white.
[01:07:16]  And they're like, yeah, we are.
[01:07:17]  And white people are like, no, Exception brothers, bro.
[01:07:21]  No, I'm just saying.
[01:07:21]  So when he said there's no white people in his audience, he was like, I'm like, everybody.
[01:07:26]  This is just me and Akash.
[01:07:27]  That's it.
[01:07:28]  You think that Shifty's a white guy?
[01:07:30]  Shifty's white.
[01:07:30]  Shifty, are you no different?
[01:07:33]  But it's like.
[01:07:34]  Yeah, but no.
[01:07:36]  He doesn't speak a ton of people.
[01:07:37]  There's no fucking ice raid or whatever here.
[01:07:40]  And you don't have a car anyway.
[01:07:41]  So you're safe.
[01:07:44]  Yeah.
[01:07:44]  Too soon?
[01:07:45]  Too soon.
[01:07:47]  Okay.
[01:07:48]  Anyway, point being, there's no negative, there's no negative attachment whatsoever if a guy's like, I'm by.
[01:07:54]  No, and honestly, I think I implore all the straight boyfriends to watch this with your girl.
[01:08:00]  It'll just be fun for everybody.
[01:08:02]  To follow up on that, on Al's point.
[01:08:05]  If your girl watches this, not your girls, hypothetical.
[01:08:07]  This is a whole different world.
[01:08:08]  You live in a different dimension.
[01:08:09]  Yeah.
[01:08:10]  You watch this with a girl.
[01:08:11]  She gets all horned up.
[01:08:13]  You guys have sexual activities after.
[01:08:16]  How does that make you feel?
[01:08:17]  You gay by association.
[01:08:21]  Yeah, you know.
[01:08:22]  You know that's good.
[01:08:23]  You'll watch that together.
[01:08:24]  Yeah, you have to do it.
[01:08:24]  You just watch it.
[01:08:26]  You just watch an episode and then you go straight to the bedroom.
[01:08:33]  But you're having straight sex.
[01:08:34]  Yeah, having sex with a woman is straight in here.
[01:08:36]  But she got turned on by watching gay guys.
[01:08:38]  Why are you watching it with her?
[01:08:39]  But fucking.
[01:08:40]  Whatever it takes.
[01:08:41]  Whatever it takes.
[01:08:42]  Nah, I could do it.
[01:08:43]  It's good.
[01:08:44]  I was jokingly saying I'd watch this show on our call yesterday, and now I'm like, nah.
[01:08:49]  It's really so good.
[01:08:50]  You should watch it.
[01:08:51]  I watch it.
[01:08:52]  I don't believe it's good.
[01:08:54]  From the cabin.
[01:08:55]  100%.
[01:08:57]  I think girls are overlooking that it's probably not a good show because they...
[01:09:01]  Oh, it's a shit show.
[01:09:02]  The dialogue is garbage.
[01:09:03]  There you go.
[01:09:03]  But then they're banging it.
[01:09:04]  It's awesome.
[01:09:05]  Yeah.
[01:09:05]  And also, if you say it's not.
[01:09:06]  I'm not doing shit shows.
[01:09:07]  Everyone's watching Landman.
[01:09:08]  Sam is terrible.
[01:09:11]  What streamer is that on?
[01:09:11]  So I'm going to go to the next stage.
[01:09:14]  Hold on.
[01:09:14]  Hold on one second.
[01:09:15]  Shifty, I need you to chime in over here.
[01:09:18]  Are we really going to talk shit about Landman right now?
[01:09:20]  I hear it's not good.
[01:09:21]  What's Landman?
[01:09:23]  It's white TV.
[01:09:24]  It's Republican TV.
[01:09:25]  It's fire, bro.
[01:09:27]  MAGA got a show?
[01:09:29]  MAGA got a show.
[01:09:30]  The only shows that work on TV.
[01:09:33]  What they did right.
[01:09:34]  This is Taylor Sheridan.
[01:09:35]  He's the guy who did Yellowstone.
[01:09:38]  What's that movie that's fire?
[01:09:39]  Hell or high water?
[01:09:40]  He's fucking a genius.
[01:09:41]  Like, he's a literal genius.
[01:09:42]  Yeah.
[01:09:44]  But what he did, what he does so brilliantly is he only casts hot chicks.
[01:09:48]  So every girl in the show is a dime.
[01:09:51]  Even smart women in the show are hot, which is obviously fiction.
[01:09:57]  But there's a lawyer in the show who's like a 10 out of 10, which has never happened in the history of female lawyers.
[01:10:03]  But 10 out of 10 is super hot.
[01:10:06]  Every girl's super hot and every guy's ugly.
[01:10:08]  And it is like a guy's dream to watch super hot chicks be attracted to other girls.
[01:10:12]  That sounds exactly like Heated Rivalry.
[01:10:14]  Yeah.
[01:10:14]  Heated Rivalry is two fucking smoke shows banging all the time.
[01:10:19]  That's why women like it.
[01:10:20]  Yeah.
[01:10:21]  Where's the ugly guy who shouldn't be able to get laid and then he's getting laid?
[01:10:26]  It's a woman.
[01:10:26]  Yeah, that's what, that's what, but that's what Taylor Sheridan creates.
[01:10:29]  Oh, you're saying the hook is that the guy gets the hot girl.
[01:10:31]  I thought you were just saying we just like.
[01:10:33]  Like an Adam Sandler.
[01:10:34]  No, The ugly guy that you relate to shit on Adam Saylor.
[01:10:39]  I'm saying he casts really hot women as his wives.
[01:10:41]  I laugh.
[01:10:42]  Who's the hottest woman he casts?
[01:10:43]  He married Jennifer Anison.
[01:10:45]  One of them did.
[01:10:46]  They're like in Hawaii.
[01:10:49]  Jennifer Anison got it.
[01:10:52]  I think she's a pretty good looking girl.
[01:10:54]  She was like America's sweetheart.
[01:10:56]  She's like, well, she's beautiful.
[01:10:59]  She's great.
[01:11:00]  She's beautiful.
[01:11:00]  She's not the lawyer from fucking Taylor's also.
[01:11:05]  Come on now.
[01:11:06]  In that movie, he leaves Brooklyn Decker for her, who is a literal sports illustrated swimsuit.
[01:11:10]  Yeah, that is actually realistic.
[01:11:13]  That makes sense.
[01:11:14]  Then he leaves that girl for Jennifer.
[01:11:16]  With some sports illustrated model.
[01:11:17]  No, that's just for like a little girl.
[01:11:19]  He gets engaged to that girl who's okay.
[01:11:20]  Gorgeous.
[01:11:21]  The point that I was rejecting, I completely take back, and I was wrong.
[01:11:25]  You were right.
[01:11:26]  That's what Adam Saylor did brilliantly, and that's why he's a genius.
[01:11:29]  Okay, there you go.
[01:11:29]  Yes, you're 100% right.
[01:11:31]  This is what we want to see at the end of the day.
[01:11:32]  Grove.
[01:11:33]  And by the way, I'm talking all this shit about uh ice skating show.
[01:11:38]  Also, by the way, if they're gay, if the show is about ice skating, it's not hockey.
[01:11:42]  But uh, I watched the talented Mr. Ripley last night.
[01:11:46]  Is that gay?
[01:11:47]  That's the first ice skating show.
[01:11:49]  I've never seen it.
[01:11:50]  You guys never seen Talented Mr. Ripley with Mad Damon?
[01:11:52]  Oh my god, phenomenal.
[01:11:53]  This movie is a great movie.
[01:11:54]  Is it ice skating?
[01:11:55]  Phenomenal.
[01:11:56]  No, it's not ice skating, but there's like some homosexual undertones.
[01:11:58]  But this is back in the day where they just kind of like tease it, but they don't show it.
[01:12:02]  Was it before broke back?
[01:12:04]  Yeah, broke back.
[01:12:05]  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:12:06]  This is like Matt.
[01:12:07]  It's like a couple years after Goodwill Hunting.
[01:12:11]  Jude Law is in it.
[01:12:12]  Also, what a piece Jude Law was.
[01:12:14]  Oh, handsome son of a bitch.
[01:12:15]  Gave Balding Men Everywhere.
[01:12:16]  Hope gave Balding Men everywhere.
[01:12:17]  Yeah, with that little receding hairline.
[01:12:19]  Yeah.
[01:12:19]  Okay, somehow Alex got out of this conversation.
[01:12:21]  It's just us to boys.
[01:12:24]  We started talking about girls that are hot.
[01:12:28]  You just said Jude Law's hot.
[01:12:29]  She left in the men being hot.
[01:12:31]  Yeah, I know.
[01:12:32]  I get it.
[01:12:33]  Okay.
[01:12:34]  What is this?
[01:12:35]  I don't get it.
[01:12:35]  It's Kalchi outs for outstanding performance by an ensemble in a drama.
[01:12:40]  Oh, where's this nominated?
[01:12:41]  Where's Landman?
[01:12:43]  Negative 1%.
[01:12:44]  All right.
[01:12:44]  Well, maybe it'll pull around at the end.
[01:12:48]  They haven't.
[01:12:48]  What does Calci know?
[01:12:49]  You know what I mean?
[01:12:50]  Yeah, I bet you Calci know.
[01:12:52]  All right.
[01:12:52]  You guys want to watch The Pit?
[01:12:54]  Oh, someone's going to die.
[01:12:55]  They don't.
[01:12:57]  Isn't that every show in the hospital?
[01:12:59]  Don't we?
[01:13:00]  We get it.
[01:13:01]  I have no idea what the pit is.
[01:13:02]  Yeah.
[01:13:03]  It's a medical drama.
[01:13:05]  Is it like the new ER?
[01:13:06]  TR, right?
[01:13:07]  But is there anything unique about it?
[01:13:10]  The episode is one hour long.
[01:13:11]  It's one hour of content.
[01:13:13]  Like the timeline of the show is one hour.
[01:13:15]  Do they do C-sections?
[01:13:17]  24 was like that.
[01:13:18]  That's kind of dumb.
[01:13:20]  Yo, yo, shifty.
[01:13:21]  Shifty shifty.
[01:13:23]  Mike up shifty.
[01:13:27]  If you retard Max on his pod, she's going to call you out.
[01:13:30]  Okay.
[01:13:31]  Miles retard Max just right there for one hour.
[01:13:34]  You did retard Max.
[01:13:36]  The shit in the show is one hour of peanut butter.
[01:13:38]  That is one hour of peanut butter.
[01:13:40]  It's like totally worth it.
[01:13:42]  One hour long.
[01:13:43]  It's one hour of content.
[01:13:46]  Yo, you're right.
[01:13:46]  You word this nut, peanut butter.
[01:13:48]  You worded it weirdly, but yeah.
[01:13:50]  Don't do that.
[01:13:50]  You are within the story.
[01:13:52]  It's one hour.
[01:13:52]  You meant that it's an hour of real time.
[01:13:55]  Yes.
[01:13:55]  Yeah.
[01:13:56]  Yeah.
[01:13:56]  There was a show, there's a very famous show called 24 that did that effectively.
[01:14:00]  Yeah.
[01:14:01]  And then another show called Adolescence.
[01:14:04]  Oh, yeah.
[01:14:04]  It was.
[01:14:05]  He also did that.
[01:14:05]  Yeah.
[01:14:06]  Yeah.
[01:14:06]  The famous like Wonner show.
[01:14:08]  It's all one shot.
[01:14:09]  And that kid just won a Golden Globe.
[01:14:10]  He did one of the phone.
[01:14:11]  He was phenomenal.
[01:14:12]  Oh, he did.
[01:14:12]  Yeah.
[01:14:12]  That kid shot to the police turnoff.
[01:14:15]  What about the dad?
[01:14:15]  The dad should have got something too.
[01:14:16]  Dad wrote.
[01:14:17]  Dad wrote the shit.
[01:14:18]  Really?
[01:14:19]  That actor?
[01:14:19]  Stephen Graham.
[01:14:20]  Beast.
[01:14:20]  Wow.
[01:14:21]  Beast.
[01:14:22]  Biracial.
[01:14:23]  Yeah.
[01:14:24]  But you wouldn't give him credit because he doesn't look the part.
[01:14:27]  It's fucking unbelievable, dude.
[01:14:28]  Unbelievable the world we live in.
[01:14:30]  Black Hollywood is running everything.
[01:14:32]  It is crazy.
[01:14:33]  And the guy who made the music for Wakanda, white guy.
[01:14:37]  And the music for Sinners, white guy.
[01:14:38]  We don't give no credit to Ludwig.
[01:14:40]  Yeah.
[01:14:41]  Why can't we celebrate when white people make the best African music?
[01:14:47]  Why can't we celebrate?
[01:14:49]  I need some Ludwig von Gorinson.
[01:14:52]  Why can't we celebrate?
[01:14:55]  Yo, Sean.
[01:14:56]  He just won a Golden Globe, bro.
[01:14:57]  They gave the white man a golden globe for something.
[01:15:00]  The only guy who win the Golden Globe for Sinners was a white man.
[01:15:05]  Hollywood doing that thing.
[01:15:08]  Look at him.
[01:15:09]  Oh, he's like me.
[01:15:10]  Oh, my God.
[01:15:11]  He does look hella like Mark.
[01:15:13]  Yeah, that's tough.
[01:15:15]  I mean, spangers.
[01:15:17]  Wakanda forever, that's Wakanda forever.
[01:15:22]  He used AI.
[01:15:22]  He used AI.
[01:15:23]  No, this is look at that's what Konda.
[01:15:26]  That's Sinners, bro.
[01:15:27]  Wow.
[01:15:28]  He did.
[01:15:28]  He did Wakanda.
[01:15:29]  He did Sinners.
[01:15:30]  He looks like Asher Roth.
[01:15:32]  Yo, shout out Asher.
[01:15:33]  Yeah, shout out Asher.
[01:15:34]  The goat.
[01:15:36]  But this is beautiful.
[01:15:37]  We're all working together.
[01:15:38]  And it's merit-based.
[01:15:40]  This is what we want.
[01:15:41]  Nothing wrong with that.
[01:15:42]  Yes.
[01:15:42]  Does he bring Dildos to the office?
[01:15:45]  Maybe.
[01:15:45]  What's wrong with that?
[01:15:46]  Who knows?
[01:15:47]  What is wrong with bringing Dildos to the office?
[01:15:49]  Six inches.
[01:15:50]  We're not shooting this fucking hockey show.
[01:15:52]  Sorry, they don't have the fucking slenderness at the base that you do.
[01:15:56]  Yes.
[01:15:57]  Your dick gets skinnier towards the bottom?
[01:15:59]  Slightly.
[01:16:00]  So it like opens up.
[01:16:02]  It's like a nerf.
[01:16:03]  It's like a nerf football dick.
[01:16:05]  Not that dramatic.
[01:16:07]  But what does it look like?
[01:16:09]  Like a nuke from Fallout?
[01:16:11]  Like a snake after a meal?
[01:16:13]  What does it look like?
[01:16:15]  What does it look like, dude?
[01:16:16]  Black stick.
[01:16:20]  This is MLK's vision, bro.
[01:16:22]  This is fun.
[01:16:23]  You like MLK?
[01:16:24]  Right?
[01:16:25]  Can't we be supportive of this?
[01:16:26]  I am supportive of it.
[01:16:28]  You like MLK, right?
[01:16:29]  I don't believe it.
[01:16:29]  If a black dude did the music for friends, wouldn't you be excited about that?
[01:16:33]  Wouldn't we celebrate that?
[01:16:34]  What music besides?
[01:16:37]  You think a white guy was keeping that piece of music?
[01:16:39]  That's true.
[01:16:39]  You think a white guy?
[01:16:41]  Yeah, nobody.
[01:16:42]  He couldn't.
[01:16:43]  He couldn't even do it.
[01:16:45]  He couldn't even do it.
[01:16:46]  Yeah.
[01:16:46]  All right, all right.
[01:16:47]  Okay.
[01:16:47]  All right.
[01:16:47]  I'll give it to you.
[01:16:48]  I'll give it to you.
[01:16:48]  Sometimes you guys got it.
[01:16:50]  Al, do you know what MLK's birth first name?
[01:16:52]  Shut up, Mark.
[01:16:55]  You know.
[01:16:56]  What was it?
[01:16:56]  MLK's real name.
[01:17:00]  He got his tattooed on his arm.
[01:17:02]  He got a tattooed on his arm.
[01:17:05]  I want to see that cover up.
[01:17:08]  You might know.
[01:17:08]  He might know.
[01:17:09]  Let's just see.
[01:17:09]  We don't know.
[01:17:11]  What's his literary daddy's last name?
[01:17:15]  You're scared.
[01:17:16]  What's Martin Luther King's birth name?
[01:17:19]  Okay, look it up, Joey.
[01:17:20]  I don't know.
[01:17:22]  Do I need to?
[01:17:25]  Oh, man.
[01:17:28]  It's a random question.
[01:17:29]  Al's tattoo going from Martin to Malcolm very fast.
[01:17:34]  What is his real birth name?
[01:17:36]  His real birth name is Michael.
[01:17:37]  Yeah.
[01:17:38]  Oh.
[01:17:39]  Yeah.
[01:17:40]  What's so crazy about that?
[01:17:42]  Anti-climatic.
[01:17:42]  Which is inch.
[01:17:43]  Just an interesting fun fact.
[01:17:45]  That's all.
[01:17:46]  Whoa.
[01:17:46]  Yeah.
[01:17:47]  I just figured everyone knew that.
[01:17:48]  Michael King Jr.
[01:17:49]  Yeah.
[01:17:50]  I did not know that.
[01:17:52]  You know Malcolm's last name?
[01:17:54]  Well, before we move on to that, why did he change his name to Martin Luther?
[01:17:58]  Then I think him and his dad, like wait, is this himself?
[01:18:03]  Maybe I thought that's where you're going with it.
[01:18:04]  No, no, no, no.
[01:18:05]  I mean, the truth is kind of boring, but I think he just was inspired by the Reformation that Martin Luther led to vindicate the Christian faith.
[01:18:13]  I have heard about that.
[01:18:14]  And where was that Martin Luther from?
[01:18:16]  He was German.
[01:18:17]  What did he decide?
[01:18:18]  What year did he decide?
[01:18:20]  After a trip, then what year?
[01:18:22]  Wait a second.
[01:18:24]  Hold on.
[01:18:24]  Wait, I'm like, hold on.
[01:18:27]  Hold on.
[01:18:28]  Hold on, Shifty.
[01:18:29]  Go.
[01:18:30]  Was it in the 1930s, man?
[01:18:32]  Wait, hold on.
[01:18:33]  Hold on.
[01:18:34]  This one.
[01:18:34]  It's hard to ask.
[01:18:36]  What's happening?
[01:18:37]  Hold on.
[01:18:38]  Hold on one second.
[01:18:40]  Hold on.
[01:18:42]  I don't know where you're going.
[01:18:43]  You're not going to stop doing this.
[01:18:45]  Martin Luther King.
[01:18:46]  Oh, I see it.
[01:18:48]  Went to Germany in the 1930s.
[01:18:51]  He had some great ideas.
[01:18:54]  I didn't know this part.
[01:18:56]  And then immediately changed his name to a white man.
[01:19:00]  Oh, my God.
[01:19:02]  This one off the rails.

=== Pawn Shop Money Gambles (14:55) ===

[01:19:03]  My bad, guys.
[01:19:04]  I'm just saying it's another example of German and black greatness coming together.
[01:19:08]  Yes.
[01:19:09]  German and blacks coming together to make Wins of Gold.
[01:19:13]  Ooh.
[01:19:13]  In Germany.
[01:19:14]  Yep.
[01:19:14]  That's great.
[01:19:15]  Damn right.
[01:19:15]  Nothing wrong with that.
[01:19:16]  Yeah.
[01:19:18]  You know, according to certain podcasts, they'd say that Jesse was treated like a king out there.
[01:19:22]  That's what people have said.
[01:19:23]  That's what certain people are saying in certain podcasts.
[01:19:25]  People have said it.
[01:19:26]  You know, it was all propaganda.
[01:19:28]  I don't know.
[01:19:29]  Jesse Owens was a Okay, what else we got, boys?
[01:19:38]  What else we got?
[01:19:40]  Oh, yes, yes, yes.
[01:19:42]  Yes, go.
[01:19:43]  Akash, go.
[01:19:44]  All right, so I have a camera person.
[01:19:47]  Oh, my God.
[01:19:48]  This is handles all my editing, all my content.
[01:19:50]  He was the head of my content.
[01:19:51]  He called me like a month ago, and he was like, hey, man, I need to come clean about something.
[01:19:55]  I had a gambling addiction.
[01:19:56]  I worked through it.
[01:19:58]  I just want to let you know.
[01:19:59]  And, you know, I owe it some money, but everything's taken care of.
[01:20:01]  I said, okay.
[01:20:02]  Nice.
[01:20:02]  That's great.
[01:20:03]  It's good for him.
[01:20:03]  No, Not Big Kev.
[01:20:06]  Kevin's straight.
[01:20:07]  I won't say this guy's name, but yeah.
[01:20:09]  So I'm like.
[01:20:11]  You met him when we were in Abu Dhabi.
[01:20:12]  Yeah.
[01:20:13]  I was like, okay.
[01:20:13]  Hey, that's all good.
[01:20:14]  You recovered.
[01:20:15]  He asked me for a Cauchy promo code.
[01:20:18]  Did you know that?
[01:20:18]  I never told you that.
[01:20:19]  He was like, yeah, what is a promo code for Cauchy?
[01:20:21]  I was like, oh, I'll get you one.
[01:20:23]  As time passes, the edits are looking a little sloppy.
[01:20:26]  They're coming late.
[01:20:26]  I'm starting to get concerned.
[01:20:27]  I call the guy that he works with, who's a responsible guy, realtor, whatever.
[01:20:32]  I'm like, hey, man, I'm starting to feel weird.
[01:20:34]  This guy has all my camera equipment.
[01:20:36]  I needed you to find a way to get it back for me because they're both not in New York.
[01:20:39]  They're international.
[01:20:40]  They come from Canada.
[01:20:41]  So he's like, all right, man, let me see what I can do.
[01:20:43]  I get a text from the former addict texting me.
[01:20:46]  He goes, dog, I would never steal your equipment.
[01:20:48]  That's crazy.
[01:20:49]  I start feeling so guilty.
[01:20:50]  I say, yo, man, how could I accuse him of that?
[01:20:52]  This guy performed.
[01:20:53]  He worked through it.
[01:20:54]  I get a text 10 days later.
[01:20:55]  I'm doing a gig for Kraken.
[01:20:57]  Shouts to Kraken.
[01:20:57]  That was great.
[01:20:58]  But I get a gig at three in the morning.
[01:20:59]  Hey, man, I'm sorry.
[01:21:00]  All of your equipment is at a pawn shop right now.
[01:21:04]  Three different pawn shops.
[01:21:06]  You know how hard it was for me and nothing.
[01:21:07]  The greatest Toronto area.
[01:21:09]  You know how hard it was?
[01:21:11]  Oh.
[01:21:12]  All my drives and you should hire them.
[01:21:14]  And not just the cameras.
[01:21:16]  Yo, that's facts.
[01:21:17]  These H-1Bs, bro.
[01:21:19]  That's what you keep hiring these H-1Bs.
[01:21:22]  You got a higher ride.
[01:21:25]  America would never do that.
[01:21:27]  Now, he might fuck the audio and video of every single time, but you would get your cameras.
[01:21:34]  He said I went to a pawn shop, which sounds like minority behavior.
[01:21:38]  If I got to be honest, I feel like the whites do the pawn shop.
[01:21:41]  I think the whites do the pawn shop.
[01:21:42]  It's a mix of both.
[01:21:43]  It's a mix of both.
[01:21:44]  It's just some real poor shit.
[01:21:45]  Son, all my drives, all my shows, any clip on upload, gone.
[01:21:50]  So I call this guy, and I'm trying not to lose my mind, but I go, are you fucking kidding me?
[01:21:55]  You know what's crazy?
[01:21:55]  I go, you know what's crazy?
[01:21:57]  You text me 10 days ago, tell me you would never steal my equipment.
[01:22:00]  I believe you.
[01:22:01]  I feel fucking guilty that.
[01:22:02]  And then he goes, he goes, I swear to God, he goes, it's the playoff.
[01:22:05]  He goes, no, no, no.
[01:22:06]  He goes, I didn't steal it.
[01:22:07]  I pawned it.
[01:22:08]  I was like, oh, oh, fuck me in my face.
[01:22:11]  How different?
[01:22:12]  Oh, how different?
[01:22:14]  And he got mad at me.
[01:22:15]  He was like, I just can't understand how you don't see the difference.
[01:22:17]  I was like, dog.
[01:22:18]  He just had to get his money back.
[01:22:20]  And you don't just go buy it, man.
[01:22:22]  He's about to win.
[01:22:23]  He was about to win.
[01:22:23]  We're about to be rich.
[01:22:24]  Oh, gosh.
[01:22:24]  We ain't about to be rich.
[01:22:25]  Why are you damned on it?
[01:22:27]  He's making a play real.
[01:22:29]  Yeah, Landman is down now for the Golden Globe, but you don't know what could happen, bro.
[01:22:32]  We got a year.
[01:22:33]  He's a finale.
[01:22:34]  We got a year.
[01:22:35]  Peanut butter.
[01:22:37]  I had to pay attention.
[01:22:38]  And I'm calling the pawn shops he went to, like, hey, this guy stole my equipment.
[01:22:42]  I need to get it back.
[01:22:43]  And they're like, he didn't steal it.
[01:22:44]  He pawned it.
[01:22:47]  They're like, well, we need him to come in because we need proof that it's his or that it's not his, whatever.
[01:22:52]  As far as we know, it's his.
[01:22:54]  So he got to go in and get the equipment back.
[01:22:56]  That's actually really funny to empathize with a pawn shop.
[01:22:58]  Like a pawn shop exists for people with addictions to sell shit that's not theirs.
[01:23:02]  And you call them like, it's not even his.
[01:23:04]  Like, they're supposed to be like, oh, this is hurting now.
[01:23:08]  This has never happened here before.
[01:23:09]  I'm saying, I'll give you the money, but I can't trust that guy to get my equipment again.
[01:23:13]  And they're like, well, I don't know what to tell you.
[01:23:15]  And they're like, do you have receipts?
[01:23:16]  And I'm like, yeah, I can find receipts.
[01:23:18]  And they're like, all right, let me call you back.
[01:23:19]  I call six times.
[01:23:20]  I don't get a call back.
[01:23:22]  They don't give a fuck, dude.
[01:23:23]  They're just like, and it's not even there being shady.
[01:23:25]  It's like, I don't give a fuck about your little international.
[01:23:27]  I got to ship this internationally.
[01:23:28]  Even if you give me the money, get the fuck out of here.
[01:23:30]  I'm not doing that.
[01:23:31]  So I had to figure out a way.
[01:23:32]  It took all weekend.
[01:23:33]  I was panicking all weekend.
[01:23:34]  Sorry, I ignored your phone calls, huh?
[01:23:36]  Should have hit a pause.
[01:23:38]  I should have hit a hospital.
[01:23:39]  Well, but then he would have needed the guy to go in.
[01:23:42]  And I don't, I think Haas would have wound himself, gotten himself in trouble.
[01:23:47]  Fair enough.
[01:23:47]  So, to protect Haas, I had the guy's business partner who's like, like I said, a responsible guy.
[01:23:53]  He dragged him to the pawn shop in there.
[01:23:54]  But anyway, how fucking sad is this, bro?
[01:23:57]  I mean, oh, no.
[01:23:58]  I was just checking in with Arkash because he wasn't checking in with me with my child, so I was making sure he was okay.
[01:24:02]  And he hadn't send a single message my way.
[01:24:04]  That's cool.
[01:24:05]  You ignored me trying to hang out.
[01:24:07]  I did.
[01:24:07]  I did.
[01:24:08]  I have a child.
[01:24:09]  He seems justified.
[01:24:10]  He has another problem.
[01:24:12]  I had issues, dude.
[01:24:13]  It was a real thing.
[01:24:14]  So, what is the status of the camera?
[01:24:15]  So now that guy, you know, what's also crazy?
[01:24:17]  The guy who took the pawn the equipment was like, oh, I needed to pay my business partner back.
[01:24:21]  I, because he had apparently taken his credit cards, maxed them out, wrung up crazy debt to him.
[01:24:26]  Do you know what he's gambling on?
[01:24:27]  I gotta know.
[01:24:28]  I don't know.
[01:24:29]  But this is what's gamble responsibly, dude.
[01:24:30]  I have a problem with gambling, but do that shit.
[01:24:32]  Here's the thing about gambling addiction: drink.
[01:24:34]  I grew up with alcoholics.
[01:24:36]  You drink enough, you'll just die.
[01:24:37]  You drink too much.
[01:24:38]  Heroin, you do too much, you'll just die.
[01:24:41]  Gambling, whatever I can get my hands on, I can just lose it.
[01:24:45]  Yeah, but now he's probably sucking dick.
[01:24:47]  I hope so, yo.
[01:24:48]  I hope he is.
[01:24:50]  I hope you sucking dick for parlays.
[01:24:53]  I want that for you.
[01:24:54]  I want that.
[01:24:55]  All right, come on.
[01:24:55]  I just want that.
[01:24:58]  I tried to be empathetic.
[01:24:59]  It didn't happen.
[01:25:00]  I'm going to be honest with you, bro.
[01:25:01]  I will be an extra in heat of rivalry right now.
[01:25:04]  Sucking dick to gamble is crazy.
[01:25:07]  That's insanity.
[01:25:10]  I'm just feeling like every other thing.
[01:25:11]  Dude, addiction, right?
[01:25:12]  Like, nobody's so addicted to sex, they will suck dick for it.
[01:25:15]  And that's sex.
[01:25:17]  Wait, hold on.
[01:25:18]  Like, if you're a straight dude, you're addicted to sex, right?
[01:25:20]  No, they do gay shit.
[01:25:22]  Just because they're so addicted to sex, that's addiction.
[01:25:25]  Yeah.
[01:25:27]  No, that's addiction, bro.
[01:25:28]  That's addiction.
[01:25:30]  But gambling, like, is anybody sucking dick to put money on the game?
[01:25:34]  I hope so.
[01:25:35]  Yeah.
[01:25:35]  If it is, 100%.
[01:25:38]  We need a betting market on Tashi for that shit immediately, bro.
[01:25:42]  Can we put a market up for your boy?
[01:25:44]  Yeah, I would love that.
[01:25:45]  Yeah, odds on whether or not he's sucking dick.
[01:25:47]  He'll probably lie about it because he told me he stole my shit and pawned it.
[01:25:51]  Not because I stole it.
[01:25:52]  He pawned my shit so he could pay this guy back.
[01:25:54]  That guy was like, he didn't pay me back.
[01:25:57]  So that's why, because I was like, I don't believe you.
[01:25:58]  There's no reason you would steal my shit to pay back this guy that you're so close to.
[01:26:02]  This guy's going to give you money.
[01:26:04]  I didn't say his name.
[01:26:05]  No, but he's going to do it anyway.
[01:26:07]  And somehow Akash is going to lose.
[01:26:11]  Somehow.
[01:26:12]  Akash is going to spend a quarter million dollars in a lawsuit and wins to the guy who sold all his camera according to a pawn.
[01:26:17]  He sending me four days later, he's like, I'll pay you back as soon as I get on my feet.
[01:26:20]  I was like, you ain't getting on your fucking feet.
[01:26:22]  I didn't even respond.
[01:26:23]  What is this dumbass sex you're sending me?
[01:26:25]  Poor guy, though.
[01:26:26]  I mean, poor guy.
[01:26:27]  Yeah.
[01:26:27]  He's an ass.
[01:26:28]  He's an addict.
[01:26:29]  He's an addict.
[01:26:30]  You got to treat him like an ass.
[01:26:31]  I hate all of y'all.
[01:26:32]  I hate all of y'all.
[01:26:34]  Your wife is white.
[01:26:35]  Your son's a gay.
[01:26:36]  No due respect.
[01:26:40]  I hate all of you.
[01:26:42]  No due respect.
[01:26:43]  You're too rich for people to feel bad for you, bro.
[01:26:45]  Yeah, it's fine.
[01:26:46]  You're too rich.
[01:26:46]  Now, if he pawned all of Jaseline's bags, that would be hilarious.
[01:26:50]  That would be fucking hilarious.
[01:26:52]  I'm not going to lie.
[01:26:52]  That would be absolutely hysterical.
[01:26:54]  That would be content.
[01:26:56]  Oh, my God.
[01:26:57]  But it was really you on the side.
[01:27:00]  I was the video camera foot.
[01:27:02]  He's got a stretchy on.
[01:27:03]  I don't know what happened in the bags.
[01:27:06]  Wait, so did you even ask about the parlay?
[01:27:08]  Because I feel like before I judge him, I want to know.
[01:27:10]  Yeah, did he?
[01:27:10]  What was he gambling?
[01:27:11]  If he won, I'd have got my shit back.
[01:27:13]  No, you wouldn't because he wanted to gamble more.
[01:27:15]  Like, once you got some heat, you got to keep rolling.
[01:27:17]  He got to work.
[01:27:18]  He lost whatever he got.
[01:27:19]  He broke again.
[01:27:20]  But if he loses enough times in a row, he's about to win.
[01:27:22]  Exactly.
[01:27:22]  That's true.
[01:27:23]  So you can't lose forever.
[01:27:24]  Yeah.
[01:27:24]  It's gambling.
[01:27:26]  You know what I mean?
[01:27:28]  It's called gambling for a reason.
[01:27:29]  Be called losing if you lost forever.
[01:27:31]  Eventually, you're going to win.
[01:27:32]  I think we got to let him roll.
[01:27:33]  Call him.
[01:27:34]  Call him up.
[01:27:35]  We got some cameras in here.
[01:27:36]  Yo, we should invest.
[01:27:37]  We got to invest in him.
[01:27:38]  Okay, for real.
[01:27:39]  Call him up.
[01:27:40]  Okay.
[01:27:40]  Tell him, tell him I want to put one dick suck on his phone.
[01:27:46]  Let me memo you a dick suck.
[01:27:47]  How much do you want to pay?
[01:27:48]  No, no.
[01:27:49]  I'm not.
[01:27:49]  I told lips.
[01:27:51]  You're going to pay through gay sexual acts.
[01:27:53]  That's it.
[01:27:55]  But you're going to get your dicks.
[01:27:57]  Hold on.
[01:27:57]  My wife just had a kid, bro.
[01:27:59]  She's cut open, and I ain't getting my dick suck in a long time.
[01:28:03]  You don't want somebody going through something a little desperate.
[01:28:05]  He's going to want it.
[01:28:06]  You think them hockey boys want it?
[01:28:07]  Oh, yeah.
[01:28:08]  This guy.
[01:28:08]  Shit.
[01:28:08]  Like gambling at it?
[01:28:10]  Fuck.
[01:28:11]  He's feeling lucky.
[01:28:12]  Call him.
[01:28:14]  Lucky, dude.
[01:28:18]  Anyway, shout out my duro, though.
[01:28:20]  Poor, what the fuck?
[01:28:21]  Come on, I want to see Venezuela.
[01:28:23]  I want to see this episode of Pawn Stars of just your guy going to hell.
[01:28:28]  I feel bad for this guy.
[01:28:30]  Yeah, I feel bad for him too, bro.
[01:28:32]  Al, I hate you.
[01:28:35]  I hate you.
[01:28:36]  I hate your five-inch dick.
[01:28:37]  I hate everything about you.
[01:28:41]  That's a problem.
[01:28:45]  We should come back.
[01:28:46]  Wait, how did he get the cameras back?
[01:28:49]  I had to have his homie go get it with him, and now it's in his homie's possession.
[01:28:52]  But he didn't spend the money yet.
[01:28:54]  No, he spent all the money.
[01:28:56]  So you have to put the money up to get?
[01:28:57]  I had to pay the money.
[01:28:58]  Yeah.
[01:28:58]  Oh, wow.
[01:28:59]  Yeah, I had to pay his homie the money to go get it.
[01:29:02]  And then I got.
[01:29:02]  And the main issue is all my shows and shit were on.
[01:29:04]  It's like I'm working on a new hour.
[01:29:06]  Everything is.
[01:29:06]  No, I'm getting it hopefully this week.
[01:29:09]  This nigga just got got by a guy.
[01:29:10]  Yes.
[01:29:11]  I got twice.
[01:29:12]  You ain't got no cameras.
[01:29:14]  This is what I got.
[01:29:15]  Anybody else in Canada?
[01:29:17]  Haas gonna go to jail.
[01:29:19]  Who the fuck else?
[01:29:20]  Haas is going to jail.
[01:29:21]  Haas is good.
[01:29:22]  Yeah, Haas is good.
[01:29:23]  He's good.
[01:29:23]  Money.
[01:29:27]  He got to go with the guy.
[01:29:28]  Yeah, we could send somebody with him that wasn't his partner in crime originally.
[01:29:33]  I don't know where the guy lives.
[01:29:34]  I got to figure out where he lives.
[01:29:35]  Why do you have to figure out where he lives?
[01:29:36]  Do you know where he lives now?
[01:29:38]  Why would you sent his money?
[01:29:39]  So then why would you have to figure out where he lives?
[01:29:40]  But how does he get the guy to go to the pawn shop?
[01:29:42]  Yeah.
[01:29:42]  The same way he's getting the guy to go to the pawn shop now.
[01:29:44]  That guy knows where he lives.
[01:29:45]  Going to his place, grab him up.
[01:29:46]  Let's go.
[01:29:47]  So you do know where he lives.
[01:29:48]  No, because he doesn't, but his partner is.
[01:29:49]  His homie does.
[01:29:50]  If you reach out to a random third party, he's going to be like, all right, where's the guy so we can go to the pawn shop?
[01:29:55]  I feel like we're getting off topic a little bit here.
[01:29:57]  I think what we should be focusing on is this poor guy and what he's going through.
[01:30:00]  Yes, exactly.
[01:30:01]  And I feel like I feel like, Akash, when you presented this, what you were really trying to speak on is the suffering that this guy is going through.
[01:30:10]  If the guy had to sell your camera equipment, you think he wanted to do that?
[01:30:14]  Yeah.
[01:30:18]  He didn't want to mess up this relationship he has with you.
[01:30:21]  Yeah.
[01:30:21]  This is the best thing he's got going on.
[01:30:23]  You should have texted him back with the hotline for the gamblers.
[01:30:25]  Yeah.
[01:30:26]  Give him the candlesticks, bro.
[01:30:27]  Jean-Valjean, you stole.
[01:30:29]  Here's some more.
[01:30:29]  You need it.
[01:30:30]  You need it, bro.
[01:30:31]  What is that?
[01:30:33]  Son.
[01:30:33]  Les Mis Rabble.
[01:30:34]  You never seen Les Miserable?
[01:30:36]  No.
[01:30:37]  No.
[01:30:38]  There's a reason why they leave books out in Iraq.
[01:30:41]  Wait, what?
[01:30:43]  There's a reason why they leave books out in the streets in Iraq, man.
[01:30:48]  I don't.
[01:30:48]  What do you mean?
[01:30:49]  The man who reads does not steal.
[01:30:51]  And the thief does not read.
[01:30:59]  Put the shades off.
[01:31:02]  Come on, bro.
[01:31:03]  Yeah.
[01:31:04]  Little do they know.
[01:31:05]  The U.S. does both.
[01:31:07]  Give us that.
[01:31:08]  Give us that.
[01:31:09]  Yes.
[01:31:10]  Oh, man.
[01:31:11]  Well, let's start with some fun.
[01:31:13]  He was cool, too.
[01:31:14]  Yeah, I liked him, man.
[01:31:15]  I think you got to give him a second chance.
[01:31:17]  Yeah, I didn't talk to him.
[01:31:18]  No, I talked to him.
[01:31:19]  I was talking about sports for an hour.
[01:31:20]  Yeah, he was giving us some good.
[01:31:23]  He was talking to me about gambling.
[01:31:28]  I swear to God, no lies.
[01:31:31]  I was sitting next to him when we were going to today.
[01:31:38]  And I had no idea.
[01:31:40]  No idea.
[01:31:42]  This is kind of Al's fault in a way.
[01:31:43]  What did he, what were you, were you putting a battery in his back?
[01:31:46]  I don't know.
[01:31:47]  I was just acting like I was paying attention, but now he doesn't.
[01:31:50]  He's telling Al, he said, Yo, I got all this camera equipment.
[01:31:52]  He goes, Yo, you can pawn this shit.
[01:31:54]  I'm tagging the under on Al's dick size right now.
[01:31:57]  You're trying to get under Al's dick.
[01:31:59]  Damn.
[01:32:00]  That's where I hope my hallway's going to have to meet him.
[01:32:02]  Send this guy WTF Media Studios addresses.
[01:32:05]  Yeah.
[01:32:05]  Oh, yeah.
[01:32:06]  Yo, hey, he could probably use a job, actually.
[01:32:09]  He's a talented camera person.
[01:32:10]  You have so much empathy.
[01:32:12]  You should give him a job.
[01:32:13]  I got guns.
[01:32:14]  That's fine.
[01:32:15]  Whoa, whoa, whoa.
[01:32:16]  This guy's an addict.
[01:32:16]  You're going to shoot a guy with a mental health issue?
[01:32:18]  Yeah.
[01:32:18]  No, if he comes to my place, China.
[01:32:20]  No, you said you would do this.
[01:32:21]  He didn't steal it.
[01:32:22]  He shouldn't have to do it.
[01:32:22]  He pawned it.
[01:32:24]  Yeah, he's not going to steal your shit.
[01:32:25]  He's going to pawn you.
[01:32:25]  I ain't no bitch.
[01:32:26]  I'm shooting.
[01:32:28]  What the hell?
[01:32:29]  See how I use the N-word to be funny?
[01:32:30]  Committee device.
[01:32:31]  Damn.
[01:32:32]  Listen.
[01:32:32]  And you see how it also didn't really land?
[01:32:35]  Damn, Al.
[01:32:36]  He's taking away your N-words.
[01:32:37]  See, this is why I don't say that.
[01:32:40]  I don't think China should be allowed to use it.
[01:32:42]  I don't think you should be allowed to use it because you're just not good at it.
[01:32:46]  I believe that.
[01:32:47]  I believe that.
[01:32:48]  Damn.
[01:32:49]  I believe you.
[01:32:49]  He's trying to steal this.
[01:32:50]  He's just bad.
[01:32:51]  Yeah.
[01:32:51]  Nah, he's just bad.
[01:32:52]  He's a sucker.
[01:32:52]  He got rocked.
[01:32:54]  I didn't get robbed.
[01:32:55]  I had to support his addiction.
[01:32:57]  I have empathy.
[01:32:57]  You were right this whole time.
[01:32:59]  Hey, if you need a job, yo, I'm going to text you.
[01:33:01]  Al's information.
[01:33:02]  I got you.
[01:33:02]  I'm through.
[01:33:04]  You got a new studio based on his favorite color.
[01:33:06]  What was the cancer?
[01:33:13]  What's it called?
[01:33:14]  I'm done.
[01:33:15]  What's it called?
[01:33:16]  Fight the Patreon.
[01:33:17]  I don't need to know if it's Patreon or not.
[01:33:20]  But thank you.
[01:33:23]  Thank you.
[01:33:24]  We out.
[01:33:26]  Yo, we're going to continue over on Patreon, man.
[01:33:29]  We love y'all.
[01:33:30]  We appreciate y'all.
[01:33:31]  And thank you so much for rocking with us.
[01:33:33]  And we will see you over at Patreon right now.
[01:33:37]  Gay son of Daughter.
[01:33:40]  You can't even talk.
[01:33:41]  Gay son of Doctor.
[01:33:43]  Damn it.
[01:33:43]  That would have slap.
[01:33:46]  I'll take Doctor, bro.
[01:33:47]  That would have slap.
[01:33:48]  Gay son of a doctor?
[01:33:51]  You want a doctor, right?
[01:33:52]  I'm talking.
[01:33:53]  Right?
[01:33:54]  If he wants to be a doctor or she.
[01:33:57]  Damn, that would have slap.