Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh recount their chaotic Burning Man trip, detailing Vala's chickenpox scare, Chris's cocaine overdose and propane tank explosion, and Andrew's selfish ice hoarding. They contrast the event's drug-fueled dangers with moments of genuine connection, like sunrise rides and anonymous confessions, before a heated racial identity argument erupts between Al and Miles. Ultimately, the episode argues that while the playa offers cathartic vulnerability and community, it remains a volatile mix of profound human bonding and severe physical peril. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Magical Trip to Burning Man00:05:39
What's up everybody?
Welcome to Flagrant Doves Coming Down from this amazing trip to Burning Man.
We had all the boys come to Burning Man, which is the most magical place on earth.
It's literally my favorite place in existence.
I think it's the most creative, inspirational, kindest, most generous.
I'm the best version of myself there.
And I think you find the most impressive and incredible version of humanity there.
That being said, there is a cost.
There is a cost.
We didn't do a Tuesday episode, so apologies for that.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
We didn't do a Tuesday episode.
That's part of the cost.
You guys got to pay too.
You guys had to pay in that regard.
So we have a lot of funny stories that I'm sure we'll get in.
I don't know exactly where to start from this, but W definitely came in hot to the studio today.
Fuck off.
What do you mean, fuck off?
Why?
Fuck off.
You got angry at me.
Why are you so angry at me?
This was a great place.
Okay, ended a magical trip with you.
You came back you.
Yo, on the playa, you guys were so, there was no fighting whatsoever.
I know.
It was so beautiful.
That Molly or XC would hit, and then Dub would do this really adorable thing.
Can you go to the wide?
Can you go to the wide shot?
Stand up.
We'd be hanging and we'd be dancing and Dub would come up next to me and then he just kind of tuck his arm like that and then we'd just be both dancing together.
It was the most beautiful, sweet thing.
When you were on Tesla, he was like, hey, go up and hug Andrew right now.
Because he wants to give love.
He goes, he wants to give love and he's hugging fucking strangers.
He was hugging Scotty, bro.
I was hugging Scotty.
Scotty gave Alex Coke.
He was looking.
Now that I gave it to you.
I didn't do that Coke.
I didn't do that Coke.
But I didn't do Scotty's Coke.
But shout out Scotty, man.
Yeah, it was just, I don't know.
What a cool fucking time.
How did you guys like it?
I was excited.
Oh, yeah.
Or maybe Akash.
How did you like it?
It was about eight magical hours, and then I fucking destroyed my phone.
Akash, Akash came in.
Two days late.
He was supposed to get there Tuesday.
He ends up coming Thursday.
Thursday.
Thursday.
Builds his bike.
Somehow finds a way to puncture a hole in it, which was, you know, I think an allegory or something like that.
He punches a hole in the tire, which is, it's God going, don't take the bike, right?
I told you guys.
Didn't I tell you?
I said.
I said I should not be on this fucking bike.
But the playa provides, and Ben Uyeda comes in and finds a way to get a new bike tire, switches the bike tire.
We get the bike going.
Akash gets on the bike.
We're biking the first time we're biking, falls off, breaks his foot.
But we didn't know that.
We left.
Oh, that's right.
Yeah, we just left.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I was trying to keep up with y'all.
I was coming down, and I was like, I don't have enough energy for all this.
Somehow, Chris was there, and I was like, I can't do it.
I can't do it.
I'm so happy you invited him.
I didn't.
Because he's the one that took me to the hospital.
No, Bobby did.
Okay, well, either way, he's the one that took me to the hospital.
The rest of you guys were fucking zonked out at like three in the afternoon.
I'm sitting there busting my ankle 15 hours.
And I didn't know I fucked it up.
I've been walking on it all night.
Like, I'm fine.
Then I took my shoe off and it just blew up.
Oh, that's right.
Oh, because you were on the Adderall.
I had, yeah, I had half a quarter of an Addy, then a quarter of an Addy.
And I was like, I don't think this is working.
And then later, later that day.
You didn't think it was working.
This is Adderall.
They give this to children.
They literally prescribe it to nine-year-olds.
And we put him in front of like this art thing that had like lights going up and down.
You put on some glasses and Akash put on the glasses and everything turned to hearts.
He goes, what the fuck?
So it was so amazing.
He goes, get the fuck out of here.
Oh, I did this.
I did that.
I did that.
Oh, you got to try these on, bro.
You got to try.
What the fuck?
That was with a broken ankle.
With a broken ankle.
Oh, fuck.
And I was like, yo, this Adderall ain't doing shit.
And then I was like, how did I walk fucking eight hours on a broken foot?
I was like, oh, the Adderall wasn't thinking.
Wait, how did you break your ankle falling off the bike?
It's sad.
I don't know.
I'm me.
Yeah, you can't ride a bike.
It's sad.
It's like, it's sad.
It's sad.
I don't know.
Something that got caught in the bike somehow.
Yeah.
As it fell.
I don't, to be honest, I don't know.
I'm me.
Yeah.
I'd be breaking shit in a way that you shouldn't.
Nobody else should get hurt.
Riding a fucking e-bike.
Cat, bro.
His motherfucker's like, if I hurt myself, I just stay in the arms right now.
Yeah, it's like, go move.
I was like, go move.
He was ready to go.
You ready to go?
The bike lock incident with Dove?
Oh, yeah, but we got the three more times.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Where I helped you.
Thank you.
Do you feel like you're coming down a little bit?
That's okay.
We all have the come down.
No, I'm fine.
Yeah.
I'm great.
You sure?
You know I'm great.
You know I'm great.
It wasn't that funny.
When you left, you left in the craziest way.
No, that was a good one.
Nobody knew.
Like a bad ass on, son.
You just popped on the back of the truck, walked your way out.
A garbage pan, bro.
Just fucking hanging on.
No, not a garbage man.
The garbage he left on the trailer and his underwear and everything else that I didn't fucking clean up.
I had left close to my suitcase.
I was like, what the fuck?
Listen, it took Dove like a few days.
I enjoyed birthday.
I was such a good ass.
I was wondering when it was going to kick in with Dove, right?
Crazy Departure from the Truck00:14:48
And specifically because one of Dove's greatest skills in life and how he provides a lot of value for his friends and family is negotiating.
Yeah, that's it.
He's negotiating.
He's been crying.
Oh, well, we'll get to that.
We'll get to that.
But one of his amazing abilities is to negotiate.
And now he's in a place where there's no need for negotiation.
You're back to.
This little fucking thesis of yours.
Shut up.
I danced harder than you.
I provided every part for everyone to come up with.
Every DJ that you wanted to see.
You follow me.
What I said in a nice way.
What Dove does for value is take from people and give to his friends.
He takes.
And gives, right?
So now he's in a position where he doesn't have to take because people are willing to give.
How does he find that?
And I swear to God, it was like day three.
And he walked up to me at like breakfast or something like that.
He's like, hey, man, can I get you a beer or something?
And I was like, what?
And I didn't say anything about it.
And I went to Al.
I was like, did you see, did you see Dove?
And he like gave me something without needing anything.
And then he goes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I'm like, okay, we'll be quiet.
Let it happen.
And then the next day, the next day, he comes in and there's like, hey, you guys thirsty?
You guys want to like drinks or anything like that?
I'm like, holy shit, it's like really taking on.
Two nights later, we're all in the RV, absolutely fucking shit faced.
It's actually the morning.
It's like 10 a.m., right?
We're absolutely destroyed.
Dove comes in with a girl, right?
Right?
He comes in and Dove started making sandwiches for everybody.
I remember he literally, and I thought he was just going to make it for himself.
And then all of a sudden, the sandwich comes over my shoulder and it's not just a kind of sandwich you want.
It's with the fucking sauce.
He likes the mayo and shit like that.
So he's putting the mayo, the cheese, the chipotle, the thing.
Oh, let me get it.
Oh, gosh, do you want one ever?
You want a sandwich?
You want a quesadilla?
Everything like that, right?
The girls went.
And all of a sudden he goes, oh, I think I need something from the other RV to make the sandwiches perfect.
Goes back out, comes back in, right?
He goes, oh yeah, I guess we didn't have any more.
And I'm like, what the fuck's going on?
I'm like, Dove has really changed, right?
He goes back into the other RV with the girl.
And then we wake up like six hours later.
And I'm like, hey, I just want to let you know.
That was like really sweet that you like made those sandwiches for us.
And it's like amazing to see what's going on, like how this is taking hold of you.
And you've become this generous, kind person.
And he goes, no, I just had another girl sleep in the RV and I couldn't take mine in there.
So I had to make y'all some sailors so she could get the fuck up out there.
I was like, you stay here.
I got to handle something.
He goes, I went searching for fucking Jipola Mayo seven times trying to get this girl out the bed.
She sleeps.
She hung out there the whole night.
That's crazy.
Nobody told me this bitch was in there.
Say, Say!
I go to Dove's room.
She's sleeping in Dove's room.
And then I just see a girl there.
I'm like, what the fuck is going on?
I thought I was in the road, RV.
I was like, fuck, I did too many drugs.
By the way, you know how you know Dub was still dubbed?
We have an RV, right?
There's like a bedroom area with the curtain, full-size bed, clean-size bed, whatever it is.
Dove is there.
Al is in like a bunk that's not great, but it's also your own space.
They saved the couch for me.
Fine.
I'm there late.
That's how it should go.
But Dove says to me, you actually have the best spot because it's right underneath the air conditioning.
I'm like, he's so fucking lusty, bro.
He's too short for me.
He's too short for me.
I don't even answer.
We saved it for you.
Mother was going to sleep there, but we told you that to sleep there.
The right flow.
Top to the bottom.
The right flow.
By the way, it was a very simple fix.
I did one thing, and then you were like, how the fuck did you get the AC to work?
I was like, bro, you just closed this vent and then it's a little bit more.
He didn't want the girl to have the AC because he didn't want her to be that comfy.
So he turned off the AC.
Boil a frog.
I want to say that to dude, but I did that to Alex, actually, so I could get the bedroom.
No, you did.
This guy is crazy.
Mother's drunk hot.
And the upstairs area is closest to the vents.
Yeah, dog.
I came back to bite him in the ass because he hated the room because it was so hot.
That was me acting.
Do you believe this?
Y'all believe him?
Wait, y'all really believe this?
You deserve everything.
Thank you.
I didn't feel bad.
Why are you doing that?
Do you feel bad?
I'm kidding.
Thank you.
And y'all let him text y'all all on the side.
Oh, Andrew's acting crazy.
He's the crazy.
On this motherfucker.
We made an agreement in the beginning.
We're like, oh, we'll do two days and switch off or whatever the case is.
And then Dove was like, shit, your area is so cold, you can just, I'll let you keep it or whatever the case is.
Like, he's just being so nice.
And I'm like, fuck.
Every day he's like, damn, I woke up sweating again, bro.
So it's like, you guys didn't show me that you could reroute it.
I really don't think he knew because when I did it, I'm a close curtain.
He goes, what did you do?
Can we tell you all about that curtain?
He did.
He showed me.
Can we tell you about that curtain?
I'm the way up.
So Dove goes, as you can tell from this podcast, he goes zero to 100 about every single thing.
If there's a rapper in the office that is misplaced, he's screaming at Miles.
He says, I quit.
He hates that.
None of you guys can have snacks anymore.
He tries to take their snacks like they're six years old, like they don't make money.
It's a crunchy granola.
They get everywhere.
You know what a mom has had enough of her kids?
Yeah, this is what Dove is.
That's Dove all the time.
100 years.
So they're driving up.
Alex and Dove are driving up, okay?
And one of them is Volla and me are driving up, splitting the drive, and another issue.
Splitting the break.
Splitting what?
Drove me.
No, you drove.
I paid.
Splitting the drive.
Splitting.
Splitting.
Split.
Everybody has their responsibility.
Everybody has their gift to the kids.
How do you fall asleep on a drive?
Oh, you weren't even awake?
I did fall asleep.
What seat were you in?
What seat were you in?
Were you in the passenger seat?
I went to the bed.
Oh, my God.
How crazy is that?
Take it off the road.
No, I kept doing that.
I kept going upstairs.
Boom!
I wake up to that.
So I was in the front seat.
I ain't gonna go to the back.
So we're driving, right?
Now, what none of us know in this moment is Dove actually has like a crippling fear of dangerous driving because he's lost lives.
He lost from people he loves to car accents.
So he is like hyper-ventilating like through texts with us all the time.
Al canell is it?
They're following us, so we're just going as fast as Vala can go, right?
And then Al's following us.
Al drives quickly already.
He's a fast drive.
So I get these, I start getting separate texts from Dub.
Now I'm thinking it's the same thing as the Diet Coke in the office, right?
And he's like, he goes, what Alex is doing right now is disrespectful.
He keeps saying disrespectful.
He goes, this is just disrespectful.
Read the text.
I'll flip the table over right now.
I'll flip the fall.
I'll burn this shit down, bitch.
Listen, Al doesn't even drive.
His Tesla drives.
He puts weights on the wheels.
He sets it to 95.
Wow.
I told you my shit's done.
He just said Tesla.
He got high.
Look at that.
That's all he said is a button.
All right.
So, so they're going.
I get the text from Dub, right?
I'm following there.
I get the text from Dub.
First, it starts to ask, could you guys please slow down a little bit?
And we go, we're just driving whatever miles per hour.
It's fine.
He goes, listen, he goes, this is a huge fear of mine.
I'm telling Alex to slow down.
I'm asking him to slow down.
And he is just disrespecting me.
He will not do it.
I literally go, I literally said, can you just go the speed limit?
And then Al said to me, and I quote, and he puts quotes, he goes, he goes, that's not how I drive.
Yo, I will stop.
I told Vala because I'm dying laughing.
I can't die laughing and not tell Vala.
We stop in a random place.
There's donkeys outside.
It's like the most like middle America shit you've ever seen in your life.
And then we're all laughing at it because I think it's Diet Coke.
I think it's whatever, right?
And Dub finds out that I told Vala and he goes up to me.
He goes, You share my personal experience.
Personal text messages?
This guy cries Wolf all the time.
Cries Wolf.
This is how Al passes.
You're two fucking RVs.
Let me tell you: a small car passes a fucking semi-truck.
Vala at 85 is passing another one.
We're at an incline.
As soon as he gets in and passes on a two-lane highway, I was like, well, I guess I'll go too, which is the absolute opposite of how you fucking pass.
Even in a car, you wouldn't do that shit.
And I was like, gotta go.
And he's just like, let me take, let God take the wheel.
And he fucking follows Vala by like hundreds of yards.
Five seconds after we go on the lane, a fucking blue semi-truck just comes right in there.
I'm like, what happened though?
You can die.
You can die.
You were asking me to drive 10 miles under the speed limit.
What about that?
That was 10 miles per hour in this sea limit.
You Google it, you Google it, you're like, RV's top speed is 55 miles per hour.
55 miles in the RV.
No, you can't go faster than that.
I'm like, yo, Dub, I was driving 70.
I was driving 65.
All right, do 60 then.
Sound like Dub.
We're not doing below speed.
If you just drove, then it would be fine.
And then I think he started going 70 miles per hour.
Immediately.
Immediately.
Like, because he controlled it.
Oh, I'm fine going the speed limit.
I'll drive behind me myself.
This guy, he doesn't even drive his own car.
The Tesla drives.
You guys understand this?
He gives me, he doesn't understand this.
He goes, you guys understand this?
I don't even have a car, though.
I'll even tweak it.
You don't have a car.
No, you had Tesla.
You're too cheap to pay.
Dev was so upset.
When you left, when you left, Tuff came in.
He goes, okay, guys, so he's already positioning how we're all going to help clean up Alex's mess, right?
So he's like, yeah.
Okay, guys, so I understand people are leaving soon.
And, you know, like, while we all have the group here, I think it's probably best that we collaborate and just, you know, get all the things out of the RV in the best way we can.
I'm like, yeah, that's a good idea.
And then Doug just goes, I fucking knew this was going to happen.
And that's so nice, Doug.
He was so tight at you.
He was so tight at you.
He left fucking underwear on the upstairs thing where I had to clean up.
Like, it's gross.
So disrespectful.
He disrespected us.
Mark, your mouth.
Your RV was pretty clean too, wasn't it, right?
Yeah.
It was?
No.
What am I supposed to say, though?
What's your right answer?
I'd be ashamed.
That's when his limp fucking foot came in there, sat on his couch, and like reached for like a shirt to try to clean up.
That was almost worse, but it was actually sweet.
I was trying to clean was so nice and also annoying, bro.
He was so annoying.
In the limit.
He's giving you air conditioning.
He's not going to fucking drink.
And you do the biggest thing.
He got a sprained fucking ankle.
He starts bringing up fucking ladies and shit out of me.
He told me.
Son, stop it, bro.
You sprained your ankle.
Doug was there.
He still has to get an MRI.
He doesn't know.
You have to get shit.
You could do what we all do when we play basketball.
You sprain a fucking ankle.
If you're walking, you good.
He pretended good, though.
Because I was watching you when no one was watching you and I was trying to see because you were going to the RV and I was thinking, I was like, oh, he's about to walk.
I fucking know it.
And then you did a limp and you're like, uh-huh.
I was like, I'm a method.
Christian Mail, bro.
I've never seen anything like that.
That's a Sose, bro.
I'm the machinist, yo.
Okay.
Okay.
So, despite what it sounds like, we had an absolutely amazing time.
I just want to let you know.
First Walmart.
Say again.
What about Walmart?
Listen.
What about it?
Is that all Andy?
He's a liar.
Get on, get out, Andrew now.
Because, y'all, you can't convert to Judaism.
No, no, no.
We don't watch Jimmy.
I converted to Judaism.
We don't watch him.
I thought he'd be on my side.
I thought I could get him on my side.
I thought I could swap you.
This guy thought that it was War of the Worlds, and he was Tim Robbins.
Remember when he was.
Stay on it.
Don't let him switch out.
Don't let him get that clip.
I had a clip.
That was it.
Robbins.
Mercury.
He said, No bombs.
Nope.
It'll do well after.
It'll do well after this psychopath.
That's a sleeper.
It's a sleeper.
So he went a gallon a person.
Andrew went three gallons a person.
Andrew told.
I want hydration.
God forbid they're emptying the fucking aisles we're going to go.
And this is the worst thing that I found out.
So far, what is his name?
Alex, you tell the story.
Dub is too emotional.
I know.
He's too emotional.
It's all getting lost.
He just seems like a great guy.
You tell the story.
So the original plan was for us to go early.
We were going to spend a night in Reno and then have a nice, comfortable drive in the morning, get there Sunday morning.
Yes.
All of a sudden, Hendrix pulls it audible where he's like, we're going tonight.
We're trying.
We're going tonight.
What would make him make a decision like that?
I know, right?
Maybe sleeping while Vala driving the whole time.
Vala is exhausted.
He's like, bro, I've been driving crazy.
It's crazy.
It just hit him.
He had no idea that wasn't that funny.
For real.
For real.
No, that's just him.
I kept saying shit like, we got energy, right?
Like, we all got energy, like, hey, hey, hey, hey, we could do it.
So now he's tired, right?
The whole time I'm looking at him like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We got energy.
Right?
We got energy.
Bro, fuck, bro.
But literally, the first six hours of Vala couldn't reach the pedal.
He couldn't reach the pedal.
And I tried to get the chair forward, but I was too tired.
I was like, I don't think it goes.
And so the first dick that was that's why we were going to eight miles for hours because his leg was fully extended.
Running Out of Energy00:15:28
That's the only way.
He can manage the pedal.
He's also got nerve damage in that leg that makes it completely freeze.
And he was telling me, so he was telling me this story.
I'm like, well, just freeze it up here.
Cruise control.
Let's go.
Are you happy that he was in a safe RV, bro?
The funniest shit was, I was like, I was like, oh, fuck yeah, man.
We're going to get out.
I was like, oh, can't wait to stretch my legs.
He's like, fuck you mean, stretch your legs.
You're going to stretch your legs.
I was like, yeah, stretch, fan.
You can't even reach the pedal.
Is that a stretch?
You get spasms in your hands.
We were suffering, right?
This is now hour 12.
This is what I learned about Walmart.
This is what I learned after.
Let's get your foot.
You're fucking it up.
Let Al tell.
We didn't understand anything was wrong until Al pointed it out.
No, you gotta let him tell the story.
You just said to me right there, that was crazy.
This is no shooting closer to quarterback.
It's like 9 p.m. Burning Man starts at midnight.
That's why he loves Burning Man because he just, he doesn't have to ask to be selfish.
People just give him shit.
So he's like, yo, this is the best.
He's five days of getting me.
And I don't have to demand that.
Go, go, go, go.
So I think we got like another like, what, two, three hour drive to get to Burning Man.
So he's like, that's two and a half.
So now he's like, we got to get there before they're open.
So we, so we beat the rush.
So he's going like a crazy madman in Walmart.
He's like, we got to get everything.
Everything is just throwing it in the fucking car.
I'm like, yo, what is going on?
He's yelling at Dub, yelling at Bala.
He's just screaming.
I'm like, yo, what is going on?
You took an Adarl.
He's like, no, I didn't.
Motherfucker.
Dub was like, hey, can I like, you know, just get a few personal things from me?
He's like, no, like, we give them everything first.
Then I'll give people time to get their little personal items, bro.
It was.
We need a shot.
So everybody's walking on eggshells.
Because he's like, shit.
That's not fistable.
So we buy the whole store.
We would buy every single bag of ice.
They have probably all the water that they had all.
Literally every bag of ice.
It really was.
I almost left a single bag of ice.
I asked him.
And I asked him.
I literally, yo, can we leave two of them?
And I thought that that'd be more disrespectful.
There's a crazy story about the ice.
You should really tell people out loud.
This is the craziest part of the entire story.
What?
In the camp that we joined, you have to sign up for work shifts, four-hour work shifts, serving dinner, running the VR, cleaning a bathroom.
That's just part of the burning effort.
One is you supply ice and go on an ice run.
Andrew's ice runs.
That's the first place we were going to go the next day.
Can I tell you?
Little did we know that we helped Andrew fulfill his fucking duties by going to Walmart.
That's what I got.
And then delivering it to them.
So instead of at Burning Man going on an ice run, we fucking did his fucking workshop.
It's a piece of shit.
And I said, wait, wait.
But then when he delivered the ice to them, he made sure to go to every single person at this camp.
He's like, hey guys, you got ice?
Did you need ice?
I just brought it over.
It's over here.
He made sure they knew.
He brought the ice and it's right here.
Then he went to the next person and had the same conversation.
You put a tip at a bar and you gotta make sure the bars have been.
Listen, listen.
But he just started to go to people that didn't even matter.
The last shift that was open because all you motherfuckers took all the shifts, I don't think you did a single thing, but not surprisingly.
I did a VR shift.
No, you didn't.
Yes, I did.
Really?
Yeah.
Do you mean RV shift when you have a girl in there?
Is that reality, Teddy?
Which I did.
You did one or two.
Go fuck your shift.
Second shift, it was broken.
But go fuck your first one.
And then the first shift, was it broken or was it not?
No, I did the first show.
Do you know what the VR was?
Yes, the tree was awesome.
Oh, great.
Yeah.
What about ice?
Go back to it.
I don't believe he did it, but we'll figure that out.
So we got there, right?
I knew he needed to go.
I knew he needed to go.
Oh, my God.
Selfish!
I'm broken.
Selfish.
Oh, fuck.
I already did my shit.
Me carrying your ice to the fucking RV?
That's my shit.
That's my dad.
I didn't take part of it.
Okay, look.
So I picked every bag of ice out of the cooler, put them into the things.
All they had to do after they were put into the coolers was just take one of the coolers.
Matter of fact, oh, I'm sorry.
You did not take a single bag of ice for the camp.
We took all the bags of ice and put them in RVs.
You did nothing.
You did nothing.
The green one.
No.
The green one.
No, because we didn't tell you that.
Wait, is this why we had to buy ice when we came?
Because he gave it all to them.
No, no, Andrew wants these supplies.
Nobody else, just Andrew.
It was bologna.
It was bread.
It was bologna.
It was water that created a little bit.
Ice in a cooler lasts at most four days.
Okay.
So it doesn't matter.
If you guys wanted ice in your drinks, which I assumed you would, you want to bring in ice.
It's not just for us.
Okay.
I was curious.
Ice melted away after like three days because it was so fucking hot.
Yeah.
So look, so, but here's the thing.
We had our coolers.
We were cut.
It lasted the whole week.
No, no, no.
Not only that, because you were getting all your drinks from us and we were constantly opening ours and we were making drinks for everybody out of ours and using our ice.
Never once did we hang out in your fucking RV selfish.
You smell like shit.
Oh, that's Dove didn't tell you that trick?
Oh, God.
I just ran the propane for a little bit.
This motherfucker, bro.
Oh, by the way, I only took shits in your RV.
Yeah, that's good.
Yeah.
So look.
That's good.
We have a little trick, too.
So let's go.
I love all this shit.
I was unaware of all of this.
I don't know what I'm saying.
Also, Al's the joker.
Like, the one is when everybody's shitting on each other.
He gets so giddy.
So he's like, I'll send you something for you.
Let me say the next thing we move on.
So you did absolutely.
I'm trying to go.
It's fucking destroying his content.
It really is.
It really is.
You feel so guilt-ridden.
Listen.
Okay.
I just got to get it out.
Please, He ain't vulnerable.
When you've ever seen this man vulnerable in your life.
Let's go, ready?
So for literally a week and Bernie Manchester.
So we got the ice.
The reason those two shifts were open is because they're the least desired shifts.
Nobody wants the first ice shift.
Everybody's getting there at fucking six in the morning.
Last thing they want to do is wake up and then go get the ice.
I signed up for the ice shifts.
Because that's all that was left.
No, no, no.
Because I knew I could give around the system.
Well, you and Ben.
I can buy ice on the way in.
But nobody else thought about that.
And then let me tell you this.
When we arrive, literally the first thing that Amir says to me, he goes, oh, things have been kind of tough, but we didn't even get ice.
I go, you didn't get one?
I'm sorry.
You were a little sneaky when you signed up because you said, because he said, oh, I'm going to sign up, but I'm also going to use Ben's truck.
We can both do it.
And I said, and I said, because exactly.
So I said, Ben, do you want to do the ice shift with me?
Then I found out that we can get the ice from the Walmart, and then Ben got the benefit.
I let Ben stay on board.
So the first thing he's going to do is game the system.
So the first thing he does at Burning Man is game the system.
I gave him the system before.
If you understand Burning Man.
The coolest thing about the funniest thing about Burning Man, in my opinion, is how communal and how loving it is.
And then on the way out, it becomes vicious.
Vicious.
People are cutting each other off.
We jump in front of you.
And then they all take it out on you immediately.
And the same on the way in.
There was ice in the thing left.
I could have left it for somebody else.
But I needed it.
Why didn't they get here early?
Why didn't they think about it like Dove?
They did it.
You were stuck with a tree.
Oh, that's right.
You weren't.
You did nothing.
It was so hot.
It broke.
You just broke.
Anyway, but you did give me a Medello like three times, and that meant a lot that you actually got to a place where you could help me.
The funniest shit was about Dove, the only thing he cared about when we got there is like, Vala, please tell me you got the tortillas.
The power of the past.
Please.
Tell me you got it because I can't find them anywhere.
How many clutch were they?
And I made people tortillas.
I made them quesadillas.
Yes or no?
Al, did I make a quesadillas?
You did make a quesadilla, Dub.
Fake it.
22.
Community.
This guy wrote.
This guy.
Oh, my God.
You did that?
It was a real guy.
Wow.
That's amazing.
Hey, Dove provides, bro.
Why did the RV smell like shit?
Say again?
Why did it smell like shit?
That was Dove's way of keeping Al out of the back room.
He turned the propane on for a little bit and then like, oh, what's that smell?
It smells off.
A gas link?
Yeah, that was your stream.
An explosion.
What's wrong with you?
He's an animal.
I'm not sure if that happened.
You're the only person who took a shit in our RV.
Ooh.
You swore you would?
And how many showers did you take, Dove?
One every day.
There was one day you took two.
Stop it.
That was one day you took two.
Oh, but it was supposed to be one every other day.
No, but I took him in the camp as well.
Oh, my God.
You're taking the camp's water and your own water.
And I'll do it again.
They made me fresh to get my scooter doo villain.
Unbelievable.
He takes two showers total in a week without Burning Man.
What?
Bro.
Say before we went, Lord, what I needed.
AC showers, e-bikes.
Andrew was like, you really don't need regular bikes.
We've done it before.
It's fine.
It's nice to have.
Fuck those bikes.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Fuck those bikes.
Hold on, I was adamant about e-bikes.
Yeah, that was my idea.
Say it first.
Say it right now.
Vala.
You're an honest guy.
You're an honest guy.
He literally to get the e-bikes.
After I said we need e-bikes.
He literally was up my ass about, hey, you got to find the e-bikes.
I was like, all right, cool.
You're making this up.
Once again, you provided nothing.
No, it's true.
He's a leech.
A succubus.
Let's go.
Let's go to Happy Time the Desert.
Jump into the house.
That's what you are.
Cactus.
Burning Man.
Fucking the desert of all its wars.
I'm entertaining it for myself.
And you don't even provide shade.
Oh, my God.
You don't provide shade.
He's a useless tree.
Wow, dude.
I didn't realize how awful you are.
I got really excited by the Madello and I thought he'd change.
You know that I insisted on the e-bottom.
No, you did.
No, you didn't.
Andrew, I love you.
Burning Man 2022.
Tell the truth.
Everything is branded.
Every I love you.
This is a promotion.
Everybody's seen the exact same after Burning Man.
I don't know.
I think it was a little worse.
I think it was a little bit worse.
We left all our good there.
Yeah, it's there.
I mean, it was so fucking good, man.
Man.
I've been happy as shit, bro.
I start smiling at random strangers now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Never tried that before.
Yeah, the reception is amazing.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, like you're taught in New York.
You got to have your mad distance.
Mark said this earlier.
It feels like New Yorkers are really more taken by Burning Man because you're not used to people being hospitable at all.
Yeah.
Did you feel like it was transformative?
No, I mean, it's like a great exercise and like it's an immersion in all your insecurities.
Like that's what it feels like.
Like anything that you want to practice, you can do it for a week.
You're like, yo, I'm insecure about my body.
I'm going to go and like feel how it is to show my body off.
I'm insecure about talking to strangers or smiling to people.
I'm going to do that.
And then after you practice for a week and then you get into real life, you're like, oh, I've been doing this.
Like, I don't feel uncomfortable doing that thing that I was insecure about.
And so it's like a good test zone to try things out in the real world.
Yeah, but exactly what I did.
I mean, that's a brilliant way of looking at it.
But like, also, you're on 100 there.
Like, I went from there to this family party, my mother-in-law's birthday.
And like, I found myself like people I didn't even know kind of like rubbing their shoulders a bit.
Because like in Burning Man, like every person you meet, you hug and like you fucking hug.
Yeah.
Deep breath hugs.
Deep breath, like tight, and you're so tactile with everybody, you're like squeezing constantly.
And I like did it to a few people and they were like businessmen and shit.
And then I was like, I gotta start dabbing people up.
I did that.
I did that same shit, bro.
I sprayed my Uber driver with a fucking spritzer, bro.
I was like, all right, I can cool you down.
But yeah.
I told him I missed the beginning part.
Well, I want to hear your whole journey, bro.
Yeah.
Because first you show up with monkey pops.
Let's talk about this.
So Mark and Monkey Pop.
Mark and Monkey Pop.
Not Monkey Pop.
No, you have to buy.
I did it, bro.
We're talking about what we understood.
So Mark is super excited to go.
He's so fucking excited.
All of a sudden, I get a phone call.
I believe it's the day of the day.
Three hours we're about to fly to Las Vegas.
Because we were going to do one night in Las Vegas, put it together, have fun.
Then we do the drive out.
So everybody's well rested for the drive-in.
We're going to share.
Yeah.
So, so, so I get the call from Mark, and he's in his sad voice.
I'm like, did he crash my bike or something?
And he goes, he goes, Drew, whenever Mark's sad, he usually drew.
He goes, Drew, oh man, dude, I don't think I can go, man.
I'm a little sick.
You know, like, I had a little bit of a fever.
My fever broke, but, you know, I don't know if I don't feel that great.
And, you know, and then he says this.
He has a, you know, how every time I get sick, I get like these hives and shit.
So like, I just don't know exactly.
This is called foreshadowing.
I go.
This is actually a good lyric.
He says it.
And I'm like, that is a weird like one hypocrite.
I never heard that.
Everyone knows that.
This guy says he never gets sick.
Dude, never seen the hive.
Had Calmer twice, didn't admit it.
So I'm like, God damn, like, when is that hive?
She's so weird.
Like, I don't really think he's a hives.
Like, that's crazy, right?
We up there used bullshit.
He's like, ah, this guy don't want him to go.
So she's like, oh, yeah, I thought it was something like that.
Yeah.
And then we knew how bad you want to go.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
So I think that's last correspondence.
Pretty much, yeah.
Right?
That was it.
Okay.
Fast forward a few days.
Okay.
I have one text because I go get cell service with Ben Uyeda's brother and I'm messaging with Benu Yeda's brother through somebody's phone, Vala's phone or something like that.
I'm not exactly sure.
And Bobby made it seem like you didn't want to go.
And I'm like, that's weird.
Well, he was trying to like send me car passes and stuff.
He was like, yo, can I mail stuff to you?
And I was like, I don't want to get it just in case I can't go.
Monkeypox and Virus Fears00:07:05
And then he screwed.
So he's interpreting that like you're kind of on the fence.
Yeah.
I was like, dude, I'm not sure if I can make it Tuesday, maybe Thursday, but I'm 50-50.
I don't know.
So I'm like, this is kind of odd.
Like, what the fuck?
Like, Mark was so excited for the experience.
And I'm like, was he just doing it because he knows how much I love it?
And he didn't want to kind of let me down.
I was like, so confused, right?
So then we're sitting in the RV and then Mark walks in and he looks like a pepperoni piece.
Yes.
And he's coming in with all the positive energy think he could like out positive the fucking monkey pox.
Right?
Like, yes.
What's up, guys?
Like, we're here.
Like, here's what I get for the playa.
Like, he comes out like fucking Bill Nye, dude.
And, and he is, he's pocked up.
Like, the face is pocked up.
And I'm like, what the fuck is going on?
No, this was nothing.
Compared to nothing.
Yeah.
So when did you say exactly what happened?
As soon as I walked in.
You said, I have what?
I said, I have what I have.
I have Varicella.
I have chickenpox.
So you got chickenpox.
What do you mean?
What?
When you go to school with all your family at home, you never get chickenpox.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
So it's a quarantine in there.
Yeah.
And he's that real white.
They're not vaccinated.
Bro, I called my mom on that shit.
I was like, what is this?
I didn't know you were being serious about all that.
I thought this was a stunt.
But no, in France, they didn't vaccinate for it at all.
In Europe, they don't do the chicken pox.
You put it on Europe.
I know.
He won't put it on socialism.
Save you from the Nazis.
You came to Europe.
Give us a chicken pox.
I got vaccinated in Pakistan.
Where did you not get it?
You guys need it over there, okay?
You get fucking malaria and shit.
You get fucking malaria and shit.
I don't.
I've never been sick.
On Tuesday, I get a little fever.
I'm feeling bad.
I could kill you, right?
No, that's not true.
That's not true.
He could die right now.
I'll fucking do it.
I dare malaria to walk in here.
I'll fuck you up.
I was with him.
The day we flew out to Vegas, I was with him that day.
And he never told me.
I called you.
I said, I'm having a moment.
I'm like, you're no.
I called you and said I was a little sick.
Hey, hey, I know the vaccine works, though.
Now you know the vaccine works.
Yeah, exactly.
I assumed you got it as a kid or something.
I don't know.
So say what you said to me about what?
When you were reflecting on getting chickenpox, when you thought it was monkeypox originally.
I didn't ever think it was fully monkeypox.
Yo, stop cat.
He blamed it.
He blamed it on the fucking costume shop we were at.
It wasn't costume seals.
It was a costume.
These gays trying on all his clothing.
There was a fuel.
There was a few.
Maybe vibe.
There was a vibe, guys.
Truly fucked up.
Blouses for Bernie Man.
Now I get some fucking monkeypox blouse.
I'm the most open-minded guy, but as soon as you get monkeypox, you're fucking homophobic.
It happens, okay?
I know I should have put on the tights.
God damn it.
This is literally Tuesday.
I got a fever and I'm like, oh, God, okay.
I have a fever, but then I'm broke.
I got triggered by that.
I thought it was a white claw.
I just got so.
Black cherry.
Yo, are we drinking it?
Oh, yeah.
I thought, like, okay, this is going to be like a 24-hour flu thing.
I'll be good.
Wednesday rolls around.
Still kind of sick.
I'm like, all right, this isn't good.
No coughing or sneezing.
My girl's a nurse.
She goes, okay, this is, this is weird.
You have a fever.
You have a headache.
You don't look good, but you're not coughing or sneezing.
You have a virus and the virus needs to spread.
And I don't see how it's spreading.
And I was like, okay, that's a good point.
So she's like, this is kind of weird.
Just stay home.
Like, don't, you know, just chill.
Friday, I start feeling better.
And all of a sudden, I get a little pimple.
Yeah.
And then another one, like, right here.
Yeah.
And she's like, yeah, Mark, those are like, that's like a, like a sore, like a, oh shit.
You have like a boil or like a pill.
Something's wrong.
I was leprosy.
And I was pissed off at her.
I was like, you're trying to take this away from me.
You don't want me to go.
You want me to create?
I was angry.
I thought you were trying to take away my experience.
I was like, no.
He pulled up his shirt.
He looked like the crab feet from Game of Thrones.
It was crazy.
Keep going.
And then I went to the doctor on Friday.
I was like, fine, you know what?
I'm going to go and I'm just going to go tell them what's up.
They're going to say I'm fine and I'm going to go get on that flight.
I'll be good.
So I show up.
I go to the doctor.
I'm with my girl.
My girl's in the doctor's room with me.
She walks in and she goes, okay, so what's the problem?
I was like, look, I have like a pimple here.
I had a fever, no cough or anything.
And like another one right here.
Yeah, I don't know what it is.
And she goes, oh, interesting.
Walks out of the room and her and like three other doctors walk in full hazmat.
I was like, what is this?
What's happening?
And they're like, yeah, you know, it's just a precautionary thing.
You know, just want to be, you know, careful.
And I was like, it's not monkeypox.
And they're like, no, no, no, no, we don't think it is.
You know, it's not.
It's not.
But are you having sex?
I was like, well, this is my wife right here.
So, you know, yeah, I don't want to brag.
The wife step out the room.
Are you having sex?
Literally, the doctor does that shit.
He looks at me.
He's like, nah, but for real, Daddy, what's going on?
And I was like, no, it's just, you know, just my wife.
That's my only partner.
And he like presses one more time.
But he's basically just looking at me in front of my girl being like, yo, are you gay?
And I have to be like, no, like, if I'm going to cheat, it's not going to be with the dude.
Like, I promise.
Like, it's like, I'm not gay.
And then he was like, well, we're just going to check if you're gay.
And then they do a swab on the thing.
And they're like, we're just going to double check if you're gay.
And it'll come up and tell us if you're gay or not.
And then that's, they walk out of the room and they test for only that.
And I was like, okay, that's kind of weird.
And then Alicia, my wife, is like adamant.
She's like, no, no, no.
We think it's chickenpox.
It's definitely, it's not monkeypox or whatever.
Makes them do a culture for that.
She's in denial.
Yeah, I know.
She's like, because this is more on her than me.
You know what I mean?
I'm just exploring myself.
Like, this is her choice.
And so they test for both.
And they're like, okay, yeah, we're just going to go.
We're going to check it out.
And I was literally like, have you ever seen chickenpox like in an adult, like an adult?
And they were like, no, never, never in my life.
Never seen it.
I was like, oh, okay, great.
So they walk out of the room.
They're like, well, yeah, just rest up, you know, go home.
That's whatever.
And so I'm laying there.
I'm like, okay, 90% chance of chickenpox, right?
But there's 10% in my fucking head where I'm like, did I black out one night?
I like make out?
Like, is there a chance?
And like, I was like, I swear to God, I'm lying to myself.
Like, there's maybe, I don't know.
Like, maybe I got roofied and I don't even remember it.
Like, I went out like three nights before.
I don't know.
I'm like going through it in my mind.
Like, yo, did I hook up with a dude?
And I don't know.
I'm trying to see if it's fucking monkeypox.
He was like preparing for burning management.
Yeah.
And then I have my whole story.
I'm like, okay, what if in the off chance, like, I got it from a guy on the subway and like there's a particle got in my mouth and then I got monkeypox.
I'm like, I'm going through every, like, you know, like when you have a pregnancy scare, like when you're a fucking teenager and you're like, well, yeah, there was a game, maybe some slip.
I don't know.
And I don't know.
Be honest.
Not a lot of us know.
I was like, see what my finger and maybe.
But you start doomsday thinking.
So I was like, okay, maybe I got it from some crazy shit.
I don't know.
And then I'm preparing for this where I'm like, okay, how am I, if it's monkeypox, what is my approach to this?
New Lease on Life00:15:36
How are you going to make the thumbnail?
Is that what you're thinking tonight?
Yo, can we add some more box actually?
It'd be way better.
But I'm like trying to think and literally I have a pact on my girl.
I was like, okay, if it's monkeypox, we're never talking about this ever again.
Okay.
If it's monkeypox, we know what it is.
And I'm never telling a soul that it's monkeypox.
Let me let you know something, Mike.
If you ever don't show up for two weeks, you either have AIDS or monkeypox.
I'd rather have AIDS, I think.
I'll be honest.
Wait, really?
Yeah, Magic Johnson has AIDS, okay?
Like, at least it's good as a cosine.
You know what I mean?
No one has monkeypox that's respected.
Yeah, I guess.
So I'm like, okay, I can't risk it.
This is a celebrity.
Who's the face of monkeypox?
You know what I mean?
You about to be.
I am the face of monkeybox.
But no, I was like, okay, I'm just not going to tell anyone.
I'm going to just die with it.
And then I'll go on a trip.
I'll say someone died.
I'll say there's an issue.
I'll do anything to not have monkeypox public.
This is hilarious.
Publicly with your best friend.
Yeah.
But yeah, yeah.
So literally, I'm like, all right.
The public can know, but they don't.
But I'm like, I'll just die with it, whatever.
And then I got the like call back on Monday.
They're like, yes, chicken pox.
And then like, I finally, the shit went down, like, scabbed over.
And I was like, all right, I'm good to go.
Thursday.
And then Bobby, you're literally like, yo, I'm going to pick you up in Rena.
We'll be there.
You, me, Akash, Bobby.
It'll be perfect.
And then he doesn't show up.
And then it's me, Akash, and then your friend Chris from college.
Got a ticket 24 hours before.
We all drive in, roll around in some sand.
It was great.
It wasn't.
No, no, no.
That's not exactly how it went.
That's the end of the story.
Chris picked you guys up and stopped talking for the next eight hours straight.
Son, the craziest shit, we sit in the car.
He takes out his phone, starts, presses recording.
He goes, all right, we're doing a podcast.
And then he just puts the phone in the arms.
And we're just like, what?
Bro, there was, it was one point, and I'm like still recovering.
I'm like, I had like a rough recovery day.
And you have an IV drip.
I had an IV drip.
He's got hooked up to a fucking IV.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Shout out to our camp now.
Our camp is so fucking amazing.
And then they had a bunch of like doctors and nurses there and they were supplying the IV drips.
And I don't know if they want us to say the name.
No, I don't think they want us to say the name.
Yeah, they didn't.
Yeah.
Just say shout out to Aceon though.
Okay.
Yeah.
Shout out to Ace and Beth.
It was unbelievable.
And which I'm sure we'll tell more stories about.
But wow.
Anyway, so I'm like having the fucking worst day ever.
And I just have no patience for anything else.
I'm super excited for you guys to come because you're going to lift me up.
And the first person comes through the door is Chris.
And Chris, I'm like, what the fuck?
And I literally, I was like, Chris, why are you here?
That was my first thing I said.
Not like I'm excited.
And he does not stop talking.
This is how much he was talking, okay?
Ben Uyda's girlfriend, Alex, at one point, and Alex is the sweetest girl.
At one point, just walks by and goes, wow, Chris, you're a chatty on.
Holy shit.
That's a nice girl for shut the fuck up, bro.
Stop, dude.
The women in Ben's lives just do not fuck around.
You know, his sister too.
Yeah, Jesse will go, fuck.
We may have the gutches, but did you hear about that?
He almost died?
Who?
Oh, my God.
No, it happened.
You didn't hear me?
You didn't hear about this?
I didn't hear about this.
You say there's some good news?
Wait, what happens?
We'll probably have to cut this.
No, no, we're not cutting it.
Oh, it's an inconvenience.
This is the night that you left.
Everyone's out.
We're just sitting in the RV.
It's me, Jameel, Dove, and Chris.
And he's hanging out there.
He's just like, we're all talking.
He's like, yo, you guys want some blow?
And everyone's like, nah, we're good.
And Jamil specifically is like, nah, like, I don't do other people's blow.
Like, that's, I don't, I can't fuck with that.
And he's like, no, no, it's good.
It's been in my safe for like two years.
Like, it's like, this stuff is good.
Literally what he said.
That's exactly what he would say.
Yeah, bro.
I was just in my safe.
Like, you know, this shit's clean, bro.
He's good.
And he had just gotten back maybe an hour before after just a complete all-night fucking adventure and just starts.
And Jameel's like, nah, the fucking fentanyl can't mess with.
He goes, oh, see yourself.
Does maybe like eight bumps.
Dude, crazy, right?
He's a wild ass boy, though.
Eight of them in a row.
And then he's just like chatting, talking.
Like, he sounds kind of weird.
Like he's talking, like he's having a hard time finding his words.
He's forever.
Yeah, like asking a question.
That's weird.
Yeah.
Is they're connecting?
This guy must be high.
And so we're all just talking.
And then literally he walks kind of towards the back.
And then he's just standing there, just hands on his knees, just going, and I walk up to him.
I go, yo, Chris, are you good, man?
And he's like, yeah, I just feel really dizzy.
And then he just kind of goes and he sort of like sits like really hard like on the bed, like on that little couch thing.
Eyes roll back in his head.
No, no, no, no.
Smacks his head against the back of like the mirror thing.
Yeah.
Falls to the ground.
Head like smacks the ground.
Now on the floor.
Just question.
Just question.
Did you enjoy the silence for a moment?
Did you just take in the silence before you helped him?
Did you just take five seconds of him shutting the bus?
What do you mean helped him?
You just hear out cracking over the white cross.
I was going, put your feet on his belly like this.
Literally falls over.
And I go, yo, guys, Chris is, he died.
Like, he just is on the ground, just like fully limp.
I was like, I don't want to be on the dead guy bus.
Don't just stop it.
Just a level of nuance.
He's still crazy, dude.
What is my bus?
It wasn't my bus.
It wasn't my way.
It didn't seem to him at all.
Assuming how sick the camp was, I literally just run out of the door.
I go, I'm like, dumb Jamil, not going to fix him.
So I just run out the door and I just literally walk up to a mirror and I go, yo, can you tell me a medical person?
I need some type of medical person.
He literally goes, I got you.
Runs over, finds two people.
One's a pharmacist, one's an ER doctor.
They happen to be married.
They run over, jump on the bus, and just start like assessing him.
And by the time they get there, he's like kind of coming to.
He's like waking up, kind of dizzy.
And they just like chill with him for an hour.
And they're like, hey, are you good?
And they're like, yeah.
And then the ER doctor keeps talking to him and then talking to me like I'm his dad.
So he was like, what'd you have tonight?
And he was like, oh, a little bit of Coke.
I drank a little bit.
He goes, okay.
And then he looks at me and he goes, I go, yeah.
And that happened for like 20 minutes.
And then he talks to Chris and he walks over to me and he's like, yeah, yeah, no more blow for tonight.
Just, you know, keep an eye on him.
Just make sure he's okay.
Lots of fluids.
Just keep him, you know, just chilling.
And I was like, got it.
And then he leaves.
And Chris just like pops up.
He's like, you guys want to do some more blow?
That is insane.
No.
It was, we had to tell him, like, yo, we're going out.
If you're going to come out, like, prompts, nothing, nothing's going to be about.
No drinking, nothing.
So we get ready.
And then he pops out, gold shirt, some bell bottoms, and a silver orb.
And had the most amazing energy I've ever seen in my life.
He looked, he literally, I was like, dude, like, did you take it?
You look amazing.
He's like, I have a new lease on life.
I was like, literally what he's saying, he's like, I have to see a quick one.
We literally thought, we were like, but you're picking this like silver ornament, like this orb.
I was like, where'd you get that?
It's like, when I was buying my Burning Man stuff, it just, I saw it and just spoke to me.
I was like, man, the orb was sick.
The orb was fire, bro.
But don't breathe.
After what had happened.
Imagine like a completely metallic sphere.
And it's about the size of a basketball.
Yeah.
Maybe a little smaller.
Right?
I haven't seen it.
Oh, that's right.
We're like, what's he going to do with it?
But the perfect thing for being around people at the birthday.
But he was doing this thing where he was just taking it.
He was like going up to people and he was like, hey, so this is a thing I built.
There's a camera inside.
And if you hold it up, you can actually take like a fisheye selfie.
And it was just doing selfies with everyone.
They were all like, you're like, where can I find him?
He's like, I'll text you.
And they're like, sick.
And then he was just like, blow it off in a night.
What's crazy is a friend who didn't know him posted his Burning Man slideshow.
And he has a selfie with the orb with Chris in it.
And I write to him, I was like, do you know that guy?
Do you know Chris?
He's like, no, I just saw him at a robot heart.
I hate how likable he's coming across right now because he's truly one of the most annoying human beings on the planet.
He's so sweet, though.
My heart sunk when he walked in the door.
I was like, no, I know.
It's like, I'm expecting my boy Bobby.
And then Chris fucking walks in on his knuckles, dude.
And I'm like, no!
It wasn't his Burning Man energy job.
Just flips, dude.
Like this.
At one point, I had to tell him, shut the fuck up.
When we first got there, for whatever reason, on his RV, there was a loud noise.
There's like three people on the bus.
Oh, my God.
And Chris is one of them.
You hear this loud bump.
And then the first thing Andrew says is, what the fuck did you do, Chris?
Chris, he starts to answer.
Chris, get off the fucking RV.
Literally walks onto the bus.
Our propane tank explodes.
The neighbors come over.
No smoke.
Crater next to us, this wide, this deep.
Crater right next to the side.
Blowing into the camp right next to us.
Smoke everywhere.
Oh, wow.
Super fucked up.
Because Chris walked on the bus.
Three seconds.
Three seconds.
Oh, that's a lot.
It was just.
And I literally the first thing I texted Bobby, Bobby sent some texts like, you know, Bobby brought me to the burn.
So, like, and this is a place really important to him.
Bobby sends his text.
He's like, guys, it's not in the cars this year.
I couldn't be more sad.
He said, I've never been more sad in my life.
I've never been more sad in my life.
That's what a nice life you had.
And I message him.
I go, that was my first thought.
What is your fucking life?
He said, I haven't been this sad in the longest or something like that.
And my message with him is, I go, you deserve everything you see.
And you feel like you're going to be able to do it for this.
I'll never forgive you for this.
It's crazy, bro.
But his intention.
His intention was saving the day and getting these two guys a ride in.
And that was.
But they already had a pass.
They were ready to go.
You really could have made it.
We didn't have a vehicle pass.
We had to take the bus.
We could have rented a car.
Yeah, we brought a woke call.
Yeah, we brought a vehicle pass, a will call.
There was a lot of things you could have done.
Well, getting there is the easiest thing.
Yeah.
Just follow the sheep.
You don't even have to drive.
Take a test.
It's not a word.
You don't even have to drive to burn.
Bro, take a nap.
The second half of that was wonderful.
I was just laying right now.
That was nice.
He didn't nap, though.
He was there right next to me talking to me the whole time.
Thank you.
Well, after you took the Adderall.
Most of the time.
After he took the Adderall.
I didn't take Adderall until we were in the thing.
I didn't take the Adderall until we were.
Oh, you deadass.
I swear to God.
I didn't take Adderall until we were on the thing.
I saw you too.
I just had enough of Dove.
You were the first one.
I had to talk to the eight.
I had to mediate.
Remember the beef between you guys in the biscuit shop?
We were already good by then.
No, you were.
You were good by then.
You just.
He had transferred his anger to me.
You're not going to survive.
He's upsetting me because I shared it.
I used to fall.
He goes, how could you show my personal art?
That's the truth in the world to survive.
I thought the others.
I was like, that was the easiest shit ever.
What?
Burning man.
Surviving in that fucking 24-7 RV and showers.
Yeah, because we were with an unbelievable camp.
Give some credit to the camp.
You fucking hideout camp.
He thinks it's him?
It made it easier?
It wasn't you.
It was the camp, dumbass.
It was great.
You know, they're providing meals every single day, showers, bathrooms.
Good.
You said thank you.
Shocking.
You were able to squeeze that out.
You guys go to the mushroom party?
Yeah.
Oh, how was that?
It was fun.
It was cool.
It was like packed.
There were so many people.
That's their big thing.
It was jammed.
Did you have the tea?
I was little.
I didn't want to mess with that.
Okay, what drugs?
Let's talk about what drugs we did.
I did Coke and that shit is phenomenal.
I get Chris.
That shit was fucking.
I have never done Coke.
You gave me bump?
No, no, Jamil.
No, it was Al.
It was Al.
Sure.
I was right next to you.
It was Jamil's coke.
It was Jamil's Coke.
Okay.
Because I had a few.
I had three bumps.
And, but the next day was fucking.
Brutal.
It was like every bit of motivation was sapped from me.
Like, I couldn't even like untie a sneaker.
It was so fun.
And I was like, ah, this is not worth it.
But in the moment, cocaine does exactly, what I'm saying right now, I'm going to sound like a fucking 13-year-old, but it does exactly what you want to do for a party.
I get why it's the most popular party drug.
It gives you energy, excitement, and confidence in an instant.
Like, this party's good.
Let's keep it going.
I get why it's so successful.
I get why the Colombians are fucking billionaires off of it.
And every bit of it makes sense.
Like, they deserve every dollar.
What are they?
Not Castro.
What's the guy's name?
Escobar.
You deserve it all.
I understand why the CIA was like, let's not shut him down.
Let's work with him.
Because it's great.
Let's funnel this into the city.
It's just fire, right?
Yes.
And then black people fucked it up by cooking it.
Do you have to fry everything?
It was great before him.
It was fucking great.
But the cost the next day, I was like, I'm done after that.
And I knew the cost.
And I'm standing right next to him as he's getting it from out.
And he looks at me.
He's like, Vala, you got to take one too.
I'm doing it.
I was like, bro, I know what's going to happen tomorrow.
Please don't make it.
He's like, no, You're going to do it.
I'm like, fuck, all right.
And then the next day, I'm like, God damn it.
I'm absolutely destroyed.
The next day, it's literally the lowest I've ever been.
I have no energy.
I have no motivation.
And then Chris walks into my RV.
You can't imagine anything more than that moment in my life.
But yeah, it was a great drug.
I like ketamine.
That was the first time I did ketamine.
Yeah.
And I think for that music and that vibe, it was fucking.
The name is too intense for what it is.
Dude, I can't.
I can't.
I didn't, like, I felt a little relaxed, but not much after that.
Did you ever do it just on its own?
Yeah.
Oh, no, no, no.
I was always had like alcohol in my system or something.
Yeah.
Until I did it just on my own to feel, oh, it just kind of like makes you a little melty and floaty.
And you don't do a tiny bit and then it'll do something.
And no real hand.
You also didn't do that much.
But I did a few of the snorts from the.
Nah, you got to, if you had done the bumps like the rest of us did, I would have felt it.
You'd be floating.
And also, you had Adderall all the time.
And the Adderall is probably going to be.
I stopped doing Adderall because it just keeps you up.
Yeah.
And that's at the heart of it.
What's up?
What's up, Cassetta?
Oh.
We can keep going?
Yeah, I don't know.
I just like the Adderall and the alcohol.
I have the energy.
I already have, I think, good like vibes.
I like to get after it.
I like to have some fun.
Adderall and Alcohol Mix00:02:57
And then the alcohol makes it everything smooth.
Everything's easy.
We want to talk to people, want to have a good time.
And yeah, so that combination is great.
The one problem is that you stay up so late.
So you're drinking more.
So you're paying for it the next day.
So I do understand a drug where it kind of replaces the drinking.
Because I think the drinking is what you want.
That was a worse, right?
That's what you pay for.
Okay.
So that's on me then.
But it was fun when you pop a fucking bottle of champagne on the sunrise.
Sunrise sunrise.
We just have a bottle of tequila passing around and just having little sips for hours.
That was one of the best ideas.
I don't know whose it was.
And it might have been Chris' thing, but it was, we had like a bag that we could put at like a flexible cooler, right?
And we just had ice and we had a bottle of fucking tequila.
We had a bottle of champagne.
What?
I told him before we left, I was like, yo, should we just get like a bag fill it with ice and just take it all the way?
He's like, nah, nah, you don't need that.
Duff was being such a Nazi inside Walmart.
I didn't want to waste that.
Oh, Duff, really.
He was a tyrant.
He was like, God damn, he's down there.
I was like, we got to get out of here before Duff loses his mind.
I was like, can I get a few trinkets for myself?
There's no more trinkets.
Like, pack the RVs immediately.
I bartered with an employee of Walmart until we were leaving for his neck air conditioner.
I didn't have time.
We had to get in.
But yeah, the ketamine was, it was kind of like, I don't know, I didn't feel the mushrooms that much either.
Mushrooms, I know.
Yeah, I never felt the mushrooms.
I didn't feel that much mushrooms.
Benugato.
Then the Molly, I did not like.
Oh, yeah.
I did not like our molly.
Yo, when Val and I did the Molly, it completely, I didn't feel euphoria and it completely like removed me socially.
We're sitting in the corner of the tent and we're just like, yo, what the fuck is going on right now?
Bro, and then the Tesla came out.
Tesla night.
Now, let me tell you this.
There's only one thing that could help from Chris walking into my Burning Man without noticing and Akash breaking his foot the second he got on a bike.
And it being my lowest day ever.
There's only one thing that could change that and flip that around.
And it is a chemically engineered euphoria known as Tesla.
Yeah.
An ecstasy pill branded.
And it is, at one point, I'm being honest with you.
At one point, I grab Dove and I go, I feel it in my calves.
I hug Dove.
I go, it's in my calves.
We all took a quarter of the pill, right?
Yeah.
I wish we had it right now.
I wish we had it right now.
I would do it.
We got to do a pot of that.
Losing My Phone at Night00:02:10
We can do one episode.
We have to do a pod.
We're going to do one Tesla F. Bro, we're just going to be sucking each other's dicks.
Fucking bark's going to give us all monkey fuckers.
I don't have it.
Son, oh my God.
Did y'all not?
Was that not fucking the one?
That was my best night.
That's the best I felt.
I was like, holy shit.
What night did you take it?
Didn't take it tonight.
No, you were gone by the time I got there.
That's right.
I took it the night before.
It was Wednesday night.
Yeah, the night I lost my fucking phone on the player.
Oh, that's right.
The night I lost my phone on the player, it was the best night.
And then when I got back to the camp, I realized my phone was missing and everything just came crashing down.
Whose ass was it?
What dude did you call it?
You need your phone inside of him.
Yeah.
Sit on my story, bro.
You want to know the crazy thing?
We're in the RV and we're like, how are we going to find this fucking phone?
Can we do find my phone?
Whatever.
Like, how the hell are we going to do this?
And then all of a sudden, Hamed, who's in our camp, busts open the door, incoherent, probably hasn't slept for two days, and just went, Vala, I found your phone.
I felt like the oracle.
So I was whip Vala when he lost it.
You were dressed like the one.
I was with Vala when he lost.
I was like, yo, Vala, I'm telling you, you're going to get your phone back.
And he had nothing to do with it.
He had nothing on his phone to like, for somebody to know it was his shit.
Yeah.
Actually, your name is on it.
Yeah, it has Vala on it.
Yeah, but out of everybody who's there, like that one person who finds it is going to know people.
So I'm like, yo, Vala, I'm telling you, the plya provides, bro, you're going to get your phone back.
I said it's so confident when he had to get the phone back.
I was like, fucking told you.
Told you, bro.
I had a 50% chance of being alive.
No, not 50%.
To be fair, Al, ain't no 50% chance you get your phone back on the playa.
Think of all the places you go, big ass playa.
I'm just saying other things you could say.
It's either you don't get it back or you do.
And then it's what everybody says.
Nobody's like, man, that shit gone, bro.
Finding the Lost Phone00:06:06
I am still inside on it.
I'm telling you, you know, I ain't even looking.
No, that guy don't exist.
I was saying that.
I was like, hey, get it.
You think that's the most annoying part?
And everyone that found out I lost my phone, they're like, bro, the playa provides.
Yeah.
It does, bro.
It does.
It's a magical place.
When people win the Super Bowl, you got to go to Burden, man.
Fuck Disney World.
Yo, that's where you go.
Okay.
My biggest bug up was smoking weed.
Oh, really?
Yeah, I did not enjoy weed.
I did not enjoy that at all, but I had to do it.
To go to sleep?
No.
The edible to sleep was great.
No, because I was at one of the shows.
I love dancing, by the way.
I didn't realize.
I always knew I loved dancing, but like I danced for like eight hours, just like sober, just having a great time.
And then I'm standing there, just not really paying attention.
And I'm like near the front.
It is like just an awesome show.
And then I look over and I just see like some guy's elbow.
And then I look up and it's Dwight Howard.
Yeah.
And then he hands me a joint.
And I was like, I'm, all right, I'm in the rotation.
Like, I'm not going to not take a joint from Dwight Howard.
That's Superman, bro.
We were at Casbah, which is one of these parties that starts in the morning, morning.
Was that a blondish party?
Shout out to Blondish.
Yeah, the fucking greatest DJ ever.
We're going to talk about her.
That was the best parties, by the way.
But Casbah.
From Casbah in general.
They killed it.
Yeah.
And it's just me and Mark.
And this is like the last stop before you go home.
It's probably 10.30.
And, you know, Mark's from Orlando.
And we go and we walk up and then Mark sees Dwight Howard.
And Mark is fucking high.
And the fucking Tesla is still in the system, man.
And Mark goes, whoa, dude.
That was my hero.
That shit is true, though.
I just saw my hero, dude.
That's Superman.
That's Superman.
When I was a kid, I was still on the highway and I'm like, yo, the fucking Superman's right there.
Like, that was the guy.
I was at like game seven when he made like the game winning shot, like all the way up with the nosebleeds to like win the fucking Eastern Conference.
It was insane.
Yeah.
And then he's just like chilling right there.
Right there.
And then he's passing.
And then I hit it.
And then immediately like I'm dancing.
And then I'm just like so self-conscious.
Yeah.
Just like immediately anxious.
And like everyone's dancing.
It's like a big vibe.
And then like, I kind of get like a little pocket of space.
And I'm like, oh, man, like, do these people not like me or something?
At a rave with 20,000 people on there.
That's why, because I'm obviously in the trailer early.
He comes up to me.
He's like, hey, man, can you like tell him hi?
And I'm like, everybody's high, dog, except me.
Why are you?
Who cares?
It's a fucking burn.
And he's like, you know, I just don't want to, you know what I mean?
I don't want to like, I don't want to look stupid.
You guys don't want to look dumb.
Yeah, exactly.
That's how it felt.
I was just like, that's another thing I realized.
I don't like doing anything alone.
Like the idea of like, even just drinking alone, anything that's not with other people, it makes me so uncomfortable.
Interesting.
Like anything.
So I'm like, so just even just smoking and being alone, even though I'm with all these other people, I'm not with anyone else on El.
So I'm just like hanging out.
I'm like, oh, fuck.
Like I smell or like I'm being weird and like people are freaked out or like I'm like dancing too much after you're high or like right after I smoked.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And that was the only thing I did.
I just smoked and I was just sitting there like, all right, how do you, how are you, like, how would a cool guy dance?
And I'm like, they wouldn't do the robot.
Why am I doing the robot right now?
And then I'm like, don't think anything bad.
And then I'm like, oh, I'm fucking, someone's probably died in my family.
And I'm like, why am I thinking about that?
Like, thoughts, I can't control them.
They're all happening at once.
Yeah.
And then it went away after an hour.
I was like, sucks.
And then I have my camel pack.
I'm like, I'm going to drink some water.
I'm sure some water out.
Grab it, take a big sip, dust.
Just pure dust.
It was just on the ground.
The fucking nozzle was in the dirt.
Just breathe it all in.
Like my tongue is burning.
Imagine cotton mouth plus also just inhaling fucking 9-11 ash.
It's just like filling my lungs.
Jesus.
And then Dwight's like, sick, right?
I'm sick.
Dude, it's so true, man.
I had an experience like that.
It was with mushrooms, but like where I was just in a like an insecure vacuum.
Yeah.
There's just one thing after another.
This wasn't this time.
This was, I think, my first time.
Maybe I went.
Maybe it was the second time, but it is, it can be brutal.
And when you have your friends around, they can kind of like cover you a little bit.
You know, there's some love.
You know, there's some connection right there.
But being like completely alone and that starts.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I stay away from the weed.
The edibles to pass out were clutch, though.
Yeah.
You know, you just kind of need that like night, you know, light switch.
Oh, I was going to sleep easy, dude.
Really?
I never had a single issue going to sleep.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because Devil was generous enough to give you the room with the location.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
That last day just going alone was the most fun though.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I thought he would like that.
We all want to hear about that.
Yeah.
What happened the last day?
It was just dope.
Like I'd like, I just would just bike around.
I just didn't sleep and just biked to every little thing I could and just talked to as many people as I could.
And like, yeah, it was awesome.
It was like the biggest thing is just play.
It's just like a bunch of adults.
The other thing I thought was cool is the average age is probably like 34.
Oh, it's much older.
Yeah.
There's not all there's not all the fucking kids around.
There's a lot of like maturity.
A lot of people that know how to handle themselves a lot of people.
Because it's expensive.
Yeah.
It's not, the kids can't afford it.
It's also a big commitment.
Huge commitment.
Also, you don't need it if you're in college.
Your whole life is burning, man.
No, but like Coachella, like the barrier to entry, it's like you get a ticket and then you share.
Like, I remember doing it for the first time.
It's like 18 people in a three-bedroom.
Like, you know, it's the least, uh, least barrier to entry to go in.
And here it's just like, yeah, there's planning.
People are responsible.
I mean, yeah, like you said.
It takes organization.
And also, I would say, like, it's very different from college because college is, it's the opposite.
Like, you, you're reliant on so many people.
The school has got your insurance.
They've got your housing.
Your parents got your money.
They got, and every party is all this.
It's like with this, you have to search it out.
Like, you have to get your own fucking water.
You have to get your own RV.
You have to fix your own fucking problems.
And I think adults are more apt to do that.
And then kids, I think that I think there are kids that go there for the party.
Like there's all these like model chicks that are there and they're there just for the party pretty much.
Self-Reliance in the Desert00:15:18
And then hopefully they get something out of it.
I think it's very hard to be there for an extended period of time and not fall into it.
And I know we said this before, but I'm curious your guys' feeling on it after going.
Like, do you see how when you remove money and you give access to everybody, like how you create other hierarchies?
Yeah, it's very subversive.
Yeah.
Like, because you're thinking going in, like, oh, I'm going to like kick it with like these hot models and people are going to be dressed so cool.
And like, I'm going to be hanging with them.
And then you realize like the most fulfilling part is like the random guy that like works there.
Yeah.
Like this is like his 20th thing and he's like showing you a cool spot.
Yeah.
And no one works there.
Yeah.
I guess not works.
Like the volunteers are like some random dude that's just been around.
Yeah.
He's just like down to chop it up.
I mean, we had this awesome moment.
We were in this like, so we're at this tent.
We're at this camp that had like a huge dance floor, then a bar, and then it had like a side thing that almost looked like a clothing store.
And then there was a rack of clothes that were pretty like densely packed.
And if you separated them, you could go into this room where the ceilings were maybe like waist high.
Waist high?
And you had to like go through the clothes.
And it was like this almost like opium dem vibes.
And we were all in there.
And that was a molly night.
That was, that was a molly night, but it was like, it was so cool.
We were vibing.
We had met up with some random people that we had met up with before.
And one of the dudes was like an ex-pastor and it had like given up the church.
And him and his wife were there.
And And we were just talking about like their experience and what was going on and how like there's still a lot from the church that like he really liked.
And and um and we asked him if he would do like a prayer for us.
And he hadn't done it in like years.
And it was like really cool.
We all like held hands and he had said this cool prayer and he had this like moment where he was like, oh, wow, I didn't realize I kind of needed that.
And I'm like, that's the most random thing that you get in Burning Man.
That saved, that saved us.
Yeah, it was great.
Prayer saved us.
Andrew and I. Pray for your phone back.
Andrew and I were just like super low.
Hello, dude.
And just completely checked out.
And that happened.
And then we're like, oh, shit, those races, bro.
Yeah.
And then we just went.
It was great.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So those kind of moments are just, I don't know.
I just think it's so cool what people can create, especially when they're in like this safe place to be the best version of yourself.
I don't think that this is realistic outside of there, but I think one of the motivational things for me is it's like the feeling that I have here.
How can I recreate that at times?
How can I like recreate that at one of our shows?
How can you know, how can we recreate it through the pod?
How can we recreate it in these other parts of life?
And I think you can tap into it.
I think for it to be that extended feeling, you need drugs and a community that has these guidelines and all these creative people in the same place that are just looking to kind of give, but you can't take parts of that and make them exist.
Yeah, the drugs I was thinking is like, you know, they say alcohol is social lubrication.
Yeah.
Drugs are like Burning Man lubrication.
I'm sure there are people who go every year who are sober.
I didn't meet them, but I also wasn't there that long.
I'm in an RV the whole time, pretty much.
But I think it helps you enjoy everything and be like a part of it.
Yeah.
The drugs.
I actually met a bunch of people that said they were sober.
Really?
Yeah.
Because I was like, this is cool.
And I'm trying to lean in and be into it.
And I was like, this is great.
I'm really glad I came.
But I wasn't feeling the thing.
Maybe it would have happened in a few more days.
I think it takes a little bit.
Like, you know, yeah, I think it takes two or three days if it's your first time to get caught up.
Because like for me, like guilt works in the opposite direction.
You know, I don't know which direction it works in, but like there can be a guilt that you feel when you're getting too much.
Right.
And I think that's what inspires so much giving there.
It's like you see all these people that put all this time into making these art cars and creating these nights and these DJs and everybody doing this thing and nobody's making money.
And at least I started thinking like, fuck, what, what can I do?
How can I help out?
Well, there's a guy next to me.
He looks like he might need some water.
Hey, man, you want some water?
There's a guy over here and they need fucking, you know, a drink, or maybe you want to just give them a bottle.
Maybe you want to just give them a piece of clothing because they think your jacket's really cool.
You're like, you know what?
You fucking take it.
Like for me, that just starts to like set the wheels in motion.
It's pretty cool.
Yeah.
That was my biggest thing.
Is like, I wish I went alone earlier.
I wish I was just there longer.
Yeah.
And like having a thing to give quicker.
Yeah.
Because like if you don't like, I don't know, I think people are using maybe some people, I don't know, or like using drugs as a way as like a conduit to connect to people when a gift would be almost like equally or more effective.
Like once like we were at like some day thing and I just had like a spray bottle that someone gave me.
Yeah.
And I was just like spraying people down.
Yeah.
Chris.
Yeah, probably someone.
I don't know.
I was just like spraying people like it was so hot.
And then just through that, people were like, that was a great connection.
Yeah.
And I was like, oh, that is like a, I appreciated that moment more than like any type of like substance, substance-induced relationship.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't know if I can agree with you on that.
Because you know it's chemicals that are creating this feeling.
I was talking to Yeda about this.
Like you're aware that the chemicals are creating the feeling, but the feeling is real.
Yes.
What you feel, the love you feel from someone and to someone and for someone is real.
And the way that you're connecting with them is real and the things you're saying to them.
And sometimes you need that like extra push to tell someone how you really feel about them.
You know, like existing in the default world for whatever reason, like, and I hate even calling it that, but that's just what we're calling a non-burning man.
The environment might not be conducive for you to just fucking hug your friend and say, hey, man, you're the shit.
I love you.
This is awesome.
Because you're also going, man, how many things do we need to do?
You know what I mean?
How many business deals are on the table?
What can we negotiate?
What do we need to fix?
They'll think I'm weird if I say those.
Yeah.
But that's like the practice thing.
Like if you're able to like use an experimentation or like a drug experience as a way to practice how to behave outside of that.
I think people do that with mushrooms.
Like, well, have an experience and be like, oh, I have a different perspective on how I see myself and my role in society.
And now I'm going to behave that way.
So I'm like, that to me is where it's the most beneficial.
That is an interesting thing you hear about drugs in general.
If you watch the Carlin documentary, his whole career changed because of one acid trip.
Really?
He was like this, this clean comedian doing those 50s kind of like corny, I guess, jokes.
And then he had one acid trip and he was like, I'm a complete fraud.
None of this is real.
And none of this is who I am.
And then he became that kind of like anti-system comic or whatever off of one acid trip.
And I hear that about shrooms.
Like, oh, I got high off shrooms one time and I had this big revelation.
It's interesting that you'll hear that from drugs sometimes.
Hell yeah.
Life-changing stuff.
Son, music.
All these bands and shit, they were doing psychedelics.
They were creating some cool things.
But I think that's like the intentionality thing.
Like if you're just going into it and be like, yo, how can I like take and have fun and like be filled up from like this thing?
I feel like it's less beneficial, at least for me, than going and being like, okay, what can I learn from this experience?
And then apply to the rest of my life.
Because if it's only like predicated or like it can only be accessed through a substance, then you're dependent on the substance.
And then I feel like that's where you start like spiraling.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But if you can take those lessons where like you're on fucking Tesla or E or whatever and you're like, yo, I feel so much love for these people and I'm telling them how much I love them.
And now when I'm in real life, I'm going to kind of get over that insecurity because I didn't have it then.
So I'm just going to push through the insecurity and say it anyway.
And now I'm able to channel what like this substance gave me, but in everyday life without being dependent on it.
Yeah.
So that's pretty much what I did.
Like I went in going.
I was like, hey, I want to smile with, smile at people more.
Yeah.
Talk to strangers more and just be loving.
So it's like I was just walking up to strangers, giving them a compliment.
Yeah.
Just something I liked.
Yeah.
Whatever, either good energy or I like that code or whatever.
And that's the chemicals thing you're talking about.
Oh, smile.
That feeling thing is real.
You're feeling those real feelings.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I agree with you.
I understand what you're saying.
I just think drugs are also fun.
Yeah.
But no, I hear what you're saying.
I had that experience with Molly the first time.
And I've told a story a million times, but like seeing what happens when you're full and like what you want to do with it.
And you just want to like give, you want to give to your friends.
And I was like, oh, that's really cool to know.
Like humans are capable of that.
So it's like, how do we fill up?
Drugs aren't the only way to fill up.
There's other ways to fill up.
You know, some people fill up through the gym or some people fill up through achievement.
Some people fill up by helping others.
But getting to the point where you're full, knowing what you do after that is great.
Like for me, like complimenting people is not something that's very difficult for me.
I actually think it's like one of the most rewarding things about having like some level of like, I don't want to say fame, but like one of the coolest things, let's just call it fame.
One of the coolest things about being famous is I can compliment people and be nice to people and be kind to people.
And they don't think that I want anything from them.
So it's allowed me to be genuinely nice to people and it's just appreciated.
Instead of when someone doesn't know you, especially in New York, and they walk up and they're like being nice, you're like, fuck is this guy, yo?
What does he want?
What are you trying to, what's your game here?
What's what, what's your, I, I get to just be like, hey, man, thank you so much.
I really appreciate that.
Oh, I love that fucking jacket.
And then someone goes, oh, shit, Schultz, what up?
Yeah, no one thinks you're trying to steal their jacket.
Exactly.
Can I ride your bike?
Yeah.
Be like, yeah, of course.
And I feel like Burning Man creates that environment.
Maybe it's induced by the drugs and maybe it's induced by the other things.
A lot of things.
Like it creates the environment where there's a reduction of cynicism and you get to, and Uyeda said this brilliant.
He's like, you're coming to a place where there's like almost no cynicism, right?
So like you're taking everything at face value.
If somebody comes up to you, a dude comes up to you and you're like, dude, your outfit's fucking sick.
He means it.
Or if someone grabs your phone, like you trust, like, oh, they're not about to run off.
They're going to take a picture of me or something.
Because it's not take.
Everybody there is in give mode.
And when people are in give mode, it's not weird when someone gives you something and asks for nothing.
So if it's a compliment, if when I, when I, where you will take somebody's phone, you think that they're actually going to give you something out of that experience?
And it just totally like resets your mind.
Yeah.
It was interesting to see like you, you see people walk up to you in the streets over here all the time.
And it's just like, you know, why they're coming up.
They're appreciative of like the comedy, the podcast, and all of that.
And you almost have like the same type of reaction.
You're appreciative and you give it right back.
Seeing the people that would like, they would always sneak up on you at Burning Man and be like, I remember one girl going like, well, I didn't know you were a burner.
And you're sharing a different reaction with your fans in this case that were like, they probably were like, oh shit, he's giving me more than like what that probably, that interaction would normally be because you actually really want to know about them.
So I saw that with you a lot on there.
That was actually kind of cool.
And then I was, I was front row seat to this fucking glowing orb that is Alex Media on the playa.
Insert video of him head to toe sequence.
There was a day.
It's like sunrise over where, and you said this before.
I think this before this started happening all over the place where you were like, if you feel good, you look good.
And he was head to toe sequence, head to toe sequence.
And people would just walk up to him like verge of tears, like, what is this ball of energy that I'm walking up to?
And Al just like gave the biggest hugs while he was still dancing.
It was the craziest day.
It was the best hug.
Sunrise through that.
It's the best hugs.
I was loving it.
I especially love it.
He was saying hello to every single black person that I saw.
I almost started doing that.
Yeah.
I almost started doing it because I was with you when you were doing it.
It was so many black person.
So many more stuff.
I was very happy about it.
But the first hello was never like in person.
You have to see it from like at a distance.
It's 10 feet away and you see Al, you see the black person.
They look at each other and they're just like, yeah.
And they kind of like do this little dance bounce to each other.
Oh, so funny.
I had such a fulfilling experience there, man.
What was your favorite party?
Favorite party.
I don't know.
Because it's all kind of a blur to me because I don't really care about the DJ or whatever the case.
I don't really necessarily like that music.
I love it now.
Now, but I didn't like it before.
I kind of needed the drugs to even like enjoy that type of shit.
But honestly, no, my favorite things were the one-on-one experiences I had with people.
That was the favorite part.
Like one time, me and Volley, we walked off.
We went to the man and like watched the sun come up.
It was just a joyous moment, like arm in arm, just like watching the sun come up, vibing, connecting.
Like that was beautiful.
Yeah, I think, yeah, I don't know.
That's the best part.
I think it's just the personal connections.
And whether it's dancing with somebody at a party and like, or just like listening to a story or listening to like a difficult thing they had to go through.
The anonymity is so cool.
Talking to someone, yo, what's your name?
They don't tell you their government name.
Yeah.
They tell you apply a name.
I can't get on board.
I don't need a fan.
No, I need applying.
The only, the thing that's only, my only citizen.
It feels kind of corny, but the cool thing about it is that this person, I'm now talking, this happened to me like multiple times where someone tells me not their name.
And then that indicates to me, oh, they're like enjoying being a different person, being kind of anonymous.
And then I'm able to ask them really deep questions.
And we're getting into this crazy conversation.
And then at the end of it, there's no like, hey, let me keep your info.
It's just like, this ends now.
Yeah.
Like it's almost like symbolic of like burning all the art.
It's like, yo, this conversation is burnt forever.
Like this relationship is never going to happen again.
You just purged all this.
And I told you stuff I've never told anyone before.
And then we're just walking away and that's it.
Yo, it's, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're living in that moment, which is the idea of this, right?
That's what I like to do.
There's a catharsis to getting stuff off your chest.
Like, yo, I can't even tell like my family is, but like, I just'll tell you because there's no stakes.
People be telling, bro.
I was at the bathroom.
I'm waiting to go to the bathroom.
And this guy next to me, and I'm like, how are you doing, my man?
And he's like, I'm good.
He goes, you know, and if I complain, no one would listen or something.
Like, there's a saying, like, if I complain, no one would listen.
And I'm like, I'd listen.
What you want to complain about?
He goes, no one cares about your complaints, you know?
And I go, no, man, if you have something to complain about, I'll listen.
I'm going to, I'm going to listen to you right now.
I'm like, this is the gift I'm going to give to him.
He goes, I just want to die.
I got to be honest with you.
I had to go to the bathroom so bad, son.
And someone came out to Ural, and I was just like, hold that thought, my Jesus.
You got to keep it together for two minutes.
This is one gift I ain't given today.
He came out, guy was gone.
Literally.
What happened?
It was one death at Burning Man.
He didn't convince me.
He didn't say much.
But no, I didn't talk to him after that, to be honest.
Say again?
What was your favorite part?
Not that one.
This DJ was so amazing, man.
I've never heard of her.
And I know, I know.
And I didn't before.
But just because I'm not familiar with the music, I'm sure she was like a huge success.
But she was fucking phenomenal, man.
I was sober and she was great.
Right?
Great.
I was like, this is, and I don't normally like that music.
I was like, this is great.
Oh, she was just great.
And like we met, we went, we saw her at one party at Casbah, and then later we saw her in an art car.
And her and Diplo, Diplo, who also fucking crushed her on that army.
We saw them at this.
It's called Titanic's Revenge or something like that.
Titanic's N. Titanic's N.
And oh, that makes more sense because that's right.
And they were fucking killing it.
And I was high and fucking drunk.
And I tried to bestow a compliment on her.
Exceptional DJ Performance00:02:10
What did I?
I mean, I was so stupid.
You talked to her?
Yeah.
What did I say?
Because Diplo's talking to him.
He's a comedy fan, I guess.
Wait, sorry, what was I going to say?
Just Diplo, remember?
I said, I went to the bathroom.
Come down.
I guess she's not.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, I tap her while she's like, okay, I want to interrupt her when she's like mixing.
And then you tap.
You're exceptional.
She just like holds and like you wait and you want her to like focus on you.
I was like, I was like, you were exceptional.
That's a nice thing to say.
Well, I'm not done.
No.
And that's good.
I go, you were exceptional.
And then she waited.
She kind of looks at me.
She says, okay.
Now, earlier in the night, when we were watching her at this party in front of the pyramid, it was beautiful.
There was like this really vulnerable moment that she had where she was like, I really liked you guys.
And then she goes, did you guys like me?
Yeah.
And then everybody goes, yeah.
She goes, okay, I'm just working on my insecurities.
So I'm approaching her with that energy, right?
I'm like, oh, she was like, just this brilliantly talented person that also is kind of insecure, maybe in like a social setting.
So I want to come in and just make you feel so comfortable.
So I go, you were exceptional.
And she goes, yeah, yeah.
I'm like, hold on.
You tricked me before.
You tricked me in front when I was screaming.
You're the most amazing.
Wait, wait, wait, what the hell is going on?
I was like, yo, you speak English, but like, I had no fucking idea what's going on.
She was brilliant.
And then, and then, what I tried to articulate, she didn't say yeah, then she's like, yeah, or something.
I was like, yeah, thank you.
Like, but just something like super confident, like, self, you know.
And then I, and I said this, I, what I was trying to articulate, and I didn't understand how to kind of do it, but I was like, it's like you're having a conversation.
I was like, you listen to the, do you listen to the crowd?
And the only way I could kind of make sense, if I didn't explain it anymore, but in stand-up, like there's some comics that just like they say their jokes, but it's almost like they don't listen to the crowd reacting or not.
And then the crowd kind of tunes out because it's just like, you're just spewing things, but you're not listening to us.
Best Time Ever Running In00:08:43
And it felt like when she was DJing, especially in front of the pyramid, granted, we're fucking on drugs or whatever, but it was like, oh, this is a conversation.
You know, I don't know.
We felt like paid attention to.
And then she was like, oh, thank you for that.
And then nothing after that.
But she's still, I've been listening to her non-fucking stop and just amazing.
My favorite.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But it's about having everyone together.
Like for me, that was the best time.
It's just like when everyone was chilling together and we all linked up and riding e-bikes on the playa at sunrise is like I wish Vala didn't leave, man.
I really wish I texted him that.
I was so bummed that he left.
Yeah, I really wish she didn't leave.
That was probably my biggest regret that I didn't get to experience one Thursday altogether.
That's all we needed.
Literally, that was like my only like negative thing that I took from Burning Man was that I didn't get a, because our, the, the moment that we had on the drive up was amazing.
And then the moment that Al and I had was like amazing.
Probably my favorite part of Burning Man was just hanging out with Al.
Yeah.
And like, Al was just like the most adorable fucking human being ever.
He's like, he, he, he, he sees me from the corner of his eyes.
He's like, he's like, Vala, I'm a little fucked up, man.
I'm going to need your help.
And I was like, don't worry, bro.
I got you.
And then we literally just locked arms and we just started walking towards the man who was like, the man is like this like massive like thing that's like right in the middle of the playa.
And we just walked up there.
I was like, yeah, let's go watch the sunrise.
And then we just found a spot and we both just like kind of laid like this and we're just watching the sun come up.
And like it was just the most amazing moment of the whole fucking thing.
Like literally like we're both just like sitting there tearing up.
And then we just talked about everything over the past like two years, just like, you know, just like things that we've gone through and, you know, just like misunderstandings and all that stuff.
And we kind of just like hugged it out and then walked back to, yeah, that was dope.
I wish you stayed longer.
And I wish you guys came earlier because I do think that like the first few days, there's like a bonding experience that happens.
Yeah.
And the party isn't as crazy or whatever, but the bonding is so deep.
Yeah.
There's like a jitters like, I feel like it's like first day of excitement.
Everyone's so excited.
And also people are less down.
Right.
Right.
Because by day, like by Thursday, early in the night, you start to feel like, bro, bro, you like, I felt like an energy.
And I was like, oh, everybody's hurting a little.
And then it gets to like two or three in the morning and you're like, oh, everybody's so high.
That's covered up.
Yeah.
But when we were at that one party that was like, it felt like, I don't know, like dungeon.
Hellfire.
Yeah, like hellfire.
Like, I was like, yo, everybody here needs, needs ecstasy or something like that.
Like, we need a, did you feel the energy a little?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, that's how you can also follow that music.
It's like, yeah, you know, you don't need to know every DJ or this, but like the style of music, like you need to be into that style.
Get the fuck out because you will feel the energy of it.
Yeah.
I'm glad you guys woke me up there.
That final night.
Yeah.
Because I was about to just sleep that day off.
You're trying to wake me up that night.
This guy came in and is just like poking my face.
Vala, don't hate me, buddy, but I'm going to try to wake you up.
I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's his fault because he made me do the fucking boat.
But I got you going.
All right.
What about, what about you, Mark?
What was your favorite experience?
It was that first night we were all together.
Like just that whole night was like the best as far as like a collective, like, I don't know, like bonding moment.
Yeah.
And then just, I mean, I was only there three days.
So it was that.
And then it was the next day I was just exploring and like hanging out, talking to as many people as I could, just stopping people and just being like, yo, where are you going?
Can I come?
Oh, really?
Yeah.
You would just stop people.
Yeah.
Like, because that was like the thing.
That's what I was trying to mention.
Like, when like using substances as a conduit to like access emotion and then accessing the emotion later as like a more frequent and sustainable way to like benefit from the drugs in the first place.
It's like great.
So I was like, oh, this is what I would do.
Like if I was kind of drunk.
Yeah.
So I was going to walk out of someone like and try to channel that confidence.
Just be like, yo, where are you guys going?
Can I tag along?
Yeah.
And every time they were like, yeah, sure.
Yeah.
And one of the days I went to just like went off by myself, I just started stopping at random camps.
They just started helping them out.
I was like helping them put shit together.
Like one camp I stopped.
They were like doing foods.
I was just helping serving the food.
And I just like left.
I didn't even eat.
It just felt so.
Isn't it great to just help and not want anything?
Yeah.
And it was during the day when I was like completely sober.
It felt more rewarding that I was like putting it into practice.
Having time alone there is, it's valuable, but like it took me a few years to feel comfortable with it.
Like time alone, it can be scary, especially if you're, you know, down, maybe you're in your head a little bit.
But I had a night looking for you guys alone.
And what was nice about it was I didn't look too hard.
You know what I mean?
Like I took the time.
Okay, maybe I go back.
There are events that are happening.
There are DJs that are happening at certain times.
And that's your communication with people.
Yeah.
Because you can't text.
But if you know your friends are going to be at a place, you're not like in this state of, am I ever going to meet them?
You go, at four o'clock, they'll be there somewhere.
That's how I found you guys after I crashed on my bike.
And it works.
And then you, for me, like, I have a comfort and a calm because I agree with you guys.
The most valuable part to me is being with friends that I love.
And I just want to see them experience it and see them, you know, tap into these new things, right?
And tap into new things myself.
So like, I would feel FOMO if I wasn't with you guys, but knowing that I am going to meet up with you guys at a certain point in time gives me all the comfort in the world to go explore.
Yeah.
And that was really cool, man.
Which is so crazy because you're in the middle of the desert with 80,000 people and you just run into people.
All the time.
That is the craziest fucking, dude.
I ran into friends that I haven't seen in years and I lived 10 minutes away from them in LA or New York.
And I'm like, how the fuck did I just run into you?
And it was like right when you're on like your way down.
Yeah.
Cause it's like 9 a.m. The sun's up and you're hot and you're like, fuck, man, I kind of just want to go back to the RV.
You just like turn around and you're like, holy shit.
You.
That's like the coolest moment.
That night that I kind of went out solo, I was, you know, you guys were, I think, went to a party where Blondish was at like Juju.
And then that night later was when Robot Heart and Mine were, these are these two massive art cars that have music.
We're going to like meet up and play the concert together.
And I went out, I went all around.
I like looked for like, you know, Diddy and fucking Elon Musk's camp there over on the other side.
And I was like, how do you know?
How's the other half live?
And then I went to some other parties, kind of like walked around, saw some shit.
I finally biked out there to Mind Warrior and Robot Heart.
And I was looking, I couldn't find you guys.
I did another loop, couldn't find it.
Then I went back to my bike and all of a sudden I turned to my left and Jameel, my friend, since I'm 13 years old, is just standing right there next to my bike with his bike.
Selling lemonade.
Still charging a dollar.
A dollar, bro.
And then it was just like you said, it's like you're going to bump into them.
And then we just rocked out that night.
Funny thing about Jamil.
I got lost one night looking for this fucking party the same night as Blondish at Juju.
And I was like, fuck, I can't find this one party that I want to go to because my friend was DJing there.
And I started riding my bike to Juju for Blondish because I knew they're all going to be there.
And I was like, fuck it.
I'm just going to stop at every camp and just like see what's going on there.
And I'm riding my bike.
I can't see shit because it's like a massive sandstorm.
Oh, yeah.
And all of a sudden, Jameel has no lights on, anything.
Dude is like dark skinned, wearing dark clothes, no lights on.
And I'm like, yo, is that Jamil?
Yeah.
And I pull over, I was like, you're, he's like, who the fuck am I talking to right now?
Getting Lost to Find Friends00:06:30
Who do you think you're talking to?
You have no idea how many times that shit happened.
He's like Dumbledore.
You're just like a fucking, he just apparates and he's just like, I have a plan for you.
And you're like, all right, this is super helpful, actually.
But like, that was my biggest insecurity that I wish I could have gotten out of my system or like next time do better at is like not trying to maximize.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Like I have such a desire to like maximize and optimize everything.
Like, okay, I'm here for 24 hours.
How do I do all the best stuff and do everything and have the best perfect time?
Yeah.
And as a result, like I'm at things and instead of enjoying them, I'm like.
I'm just thinking about the next one.
Yeah, I'm thinking of the next one, the one I just left.
I was like, oh, I should go back to that.
Or like, is there another thing?
And like, I don't know.
It's difficult to like channel like, yo, what do I actually like?
That is.
What do I actually enjoy?
I fucking, well, I relate to that a million different ways.
And the, and that's what I really liked about like a schedule.
And Dove, this is a great contribution that you gave to us, which was like, I mean this.
Like, and I knew that you were going to do this, but like Dove would know the a few fun things that were happening that night.
And then once you knew that, he would tell you, be here, this place, this time.
You knew where your friends were going to be and you knew things that were going to be fun and you were going to have a good time.
Outside of those things, get lost.
Spend as much time as you own a fucking opium den.
We could have been doing other things, but we got in this really cool conversation in an opium den, but we knew that there were other things to do.
I get the anxiety when I don't know what we could be doing.
I'm fine choosing not to do it because I'm having fun with something else, but I don't like going at, well, what is out there?
What else is going on?
But yeah, I don't know if that ever, I don't know if you ever lose the feeling of FOMO because the more you go, the more things you realize are there.
Yeah.
Right.
So the more you feel like you were going to be missing out on.
Yeah.
You guys, you got to just dig the fucking heels in, man.
It's too fun.
Yeah, there's a way to get over that to practice that.
Yeah.
And to really be like, yo, what do I give a, what do I like?
Yeah, but what do I actually enjoy?
Yeah, I think you hit it about the being with friends.
For me, it's all about collaboration.
It's like, I just love, I love us as a group doing this.
I love group sports.
Even with surfing, I hate doing it alone.
It's an individual sport.
I hated being alone.
I like watching my friends get waves and like their eyes fucking light up when they get the best wave of their life.
I like seeing that with you guys.
There's that famous quote, not to be cliche, but like if you want to go fast, go alone.
You want to go far, go together.
But I mean that.
Like I feel that a million percent.
It is life is so much more enjoyable when it's shared.
And I think Burning Man is the epitome of that.
Like seeing everybody that you already sleep in an RV with, but at the party later when you haven't seen a few hours and the excitement that gets, why is that exciting?
Why is it fun?
Why do you like have to hug your boy?
It's just better.
Dancing with someone is better than dancing alone.
Dance alone is great.
But like Al and I were doing fucking merengue.
Yeah.
And it was just the best, dude.
It was, it was like, yeah.
Oh, so good.
So good.
Yeah.
So you'll do that.
You think you guys will go back?
That's a good question.
Yeah.
100%.
Absolutely.
No.
God told me.
You're not built for this.
God did.
God did.
Yeah.
Duff.
I will.
It's not one of those things after like that drive out and after like that part, you're just like, I'm not, I don't want to think about it right now.
I don't want to be one of those guys that talks about it for weeks and weeks and like, this is what I'm looking forward to.
Yeah.
Cause I know, I know now I can do it.
I know what I liked.
I know that there's still much to discover in there, but I know, I knew before what I knew I would like.
I love the link up afterwards.
And that's like, it was simple.
With your friends, connecting even deeper and riding sunrise on the pile with e-bikes is just like, it's everything.
But it's not something I'm thinking about right now.
I'm just like.
Well, the drive actually wouldn't be bad, even like leaving or whatever, if you just like, like if I was with my girl or some shit and we're just like able to talk and just fucking like putt around in traffic, like it would have been worth it.
24 hours who gives a shit.
You know what I mean?
That was one thing I wish.
I wish my girl was there.
Yeah.
Like that would have been so cool.
Like it's like perfect date night for a week, just exploring random shit, looking at stuff.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Like, I feel like there's less of a need for me at least to worry about FOMO or like finding the cool thing when like the like click like that is so intimate.
Yeah.
I want my wife to be there, but I want other people's wives to be there because I want them to be able to experience shit too.
Because I still want things.
I still want to do things myself.
And I know that especially the first time, that would make my wife uncomfortable.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I also don't want to babysit.
Yeah.
So I want to experience the things that we want to experience together.
And then I want her and the girls to go do the things that they're curious about.
There's a fucking spa on Burning Man that you get an appointment to do your fucking toes and your fingers.
There's a pregnancy meetup.
I was like, talk to like this pregnant couple for like a few hours and like they literally were at a meetup where there was like 30 pregnant women that were just like hanging out.
And I didn't want to be judgmentals and I was, I was like, so like, have you been, you know, sober this week?
She looked at me like, ah, she was like, you fucking idiot.
Dumb.
I was like, well, you know, I don't want to judge.
But yeah, it's like, there's so many things for everyone.
It seems like the best.
Yeah.
We'll see.
We'll see if they get down.
But I'm thinking like, oh, I want my parents to go.
I want my sister.
Like every single thing I saw, I knew a person of my life that was like, oh, this would be their favorite thing.
And I'm so pissed like they can't be here to do their favorite thing.
So I just have to go tell them about it.
Yeah.
I've had those exact same feelings.
I still have those afterwards.
Like, because there is something for everybody there.
And then you get to experience the thing that you like in the greatest environment ever created.
With other people that that's also their favorite thing.
And it just happened.
It was so coincidental.
You just speak out about the art with the people that also are geeking out about it and then love you and think you're great.
That was a really cool mode.
We walked into an art thing and there was this guy.
Like it was the one where like all the different mechanisms like impacted the lights.
Yeah.
So like yeah, you would like, yeah.
So like every little thing was happening and there's this guy running up being like, oh, try this one.
Do this thing.
Put on these glasses.
And you walk up to him and you go, oh, are you the artist?
And he goes, no, I'm not.
I just thought I'm really excited.
Yeah.
And so he's just like showing everyone how to do it.
He's just like running the thing.
Apparently the actual artist is in there and they were just like joking.
Well, this guy was like, watching people get excited off their.
Something for Everybody There00:03:21
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Do you, do you, are you already planning going back?
Like, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like, yeah.
I'm definitely bringing my girl next time.
100%.
Yeah.
She has to go.
Yeah.
I want to bring as many people as you can.
It's like everybody I know, especially black people, I would like to bring more of them.
Yeah.
It's like, they need to see this.
Yeah.
You?
I mean, the second I'm out, I missed it.
I woke up the next morning and I was like having FOMO.
And then I was like, I started playing the music.
I was like listening to blondish and I would like get caught up.
And it was almost like if there's a little like ecstasy left in my system, it like rattles it and gets it going again.
It's like in your spinal cord.
Yeah.
Crack your back.
There we go.
You stir the glass and there's like some sediment at the bottom, right?
What's crazy is you don't party.
Like you really don't.
Like sometimes on tour, so I'm not.
I'm not a partier like that.
Yeah.
I'm just like, what is the goal?
What is the thing you could do in between?
Like vacation partying?
No, but like for me, like even on tour, like what is my favorite thing to do?
Eating.
No, no, but it's not eating.
Oh, that being a show.
It's being a communal aspect of eating.
Talking, fucking busting balls, enjoying life, listening to some music.
I could hang out in the fucking green room afterwards and do the same thing with everybody.
Like, so this, I get the same thing from, you know, Bernie Man in that regard.
We're all together.
We're all, you know, enjoying life.
We're all making fun of one another.
We're all appreciating what we just did.
Like a post-show, isn't that different?
Like, think about after Radio City or like after when we did Town Hall.
Like crazy energy, Euphoria.
Oh, yeah, excessive.
Attitude.
Like, yeah.
Seeing people like excited over like banal achievements is so funny too.
Like just the sunrising and then people hugging.
Yeah.
Like we did it.
It's like time went cheering.
But they were so excited.
I felt it too.
I was like, we did do it.
We didn't, but we did though.
Yeah.
But the beauty of that shit with the mountains.
Oh, yeah.
And like it warms you up.
You get sun worship.
You get why like every culture like worship the sun.
It's like, yo, all life comes from this thing.
It makes you feel good.
You see it.
You're safe from predators.
Like everything good in the world happens when that thing is there.
And everything bad is when that thing's not there.
And there's something really cool when you're with all your friends and all your loved ones and you're sitting on the ground and the sun is literally peeking from the ground.
And it's like making its way up and you're like, and you can still hear like the music from Robot Heart bumping.
And you're like, oh, shit, this is dope.
It's like, yeah, it's just fucking great.
And you know what's interesting?
As much as we're talking about how awesome this place is, is I don't know why I should be laughing.
Yeah, I know.
These guys are mushing right now.
What?
It doesn't matter.
We plow through.
As amazing as we're describing it, it is the worst environment on the planet.
The harshest.
Like desert, hot as fuck during the day.
Sand is everywhere.
Dust.
Not even sand.
Sand is easy to get off.
Dust is on you.
But isn't that cool that all these feelings and we have can't exist and then immediately dust it.
It's chased on it.
Yeah.
Immediately.
You create clay by watching.
You guys run in the valley this past week.
It was brutal.
It was bad.
It was like 112 degrees every day.
Harsh Environment Reality Check00:12:09
People that were sleeping in tents had to change their entire schedules because they couldn't physically go to sleep in the daytime.
Yeah.
And it would have to sleep in the middle of the day.
Was this in a tent?
Yeah, I know.
All right.
Well, look, any last thoughts?
Anything else that we want to share?
No, I had a great time.
Thank you so much for making it happen.
Of course, man.
Not only the inspo, but also like planning everything.
Yeah, Andrew, thank everything.
Thank no, thank Ben Uyeda.
Ben Uyeda was so fucking amazing with this, man.
Like he's, dude, that's something I really enjoyed with Ben is like, we would, we would do all this like planning and like problem solving and like organizing and like also thinking how we would do things in the future and how we would improve things.
And it was like this little cool bonding moment that we would share like every single day.
And it was it was beautiful.
Like I really enjoyed problem solving with him.
And yeah, it was great.
And like figuring out, seeing how his mind worked with things.
That was my favorite.
Yeah, seeing the way his mind works.
His analogies.
Oh, it was amazing.
A machine, but yeah, it was really cool.
Best body on earth.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah, unbelievable.
His brother loves his brother.
Oh, yeah.
His brother's great too, man.
But yeah, I would like encourage people to go on the supposition that you are in a mental state where you're ready to give and play and also old enough to appreciate it and then not going into it with the assumption that drugs are necessary.
Yeah.
And that like they could be used to have fun and kind of like get things moving, but like not essential.
You're going to do them probably no matter what.
No.
No, no, I mean, like, it is, it is what happens there.
But I say that because I'm saying don't do, don't, don't go there to do drugs.
Like you can do drugs anywhere.
There's no, there's like, it's not what you're going there for is you're going to find out, but it will be that connection.
And that connection will happen with or without the drugs.
It will happen during the day when you're miserable and somebody's handing you a fucking ice cold beer when you really fucking want one, you know, or it'll happen at night when you guys were partying there.
But yeah, the drugs aren't like this necessary component, but it is a quicker way to get you there.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah.
Go check it out if you guys want to.
If you don't want to, it's all good.
Oh, the guys that didn't come, do you guys have curiosity about going?
Miles said no to the experience.
Yeah.
Yeah, of course.
I mean, I would have loved to go, but some other time, definitely.
Yeah.
I don't feel like he, I don't feel like he wants it.
Guys, we didn't do a good job driving the burn.
He'll go.
He'll love it.
Yeah.
He's the guy that explores every camp, every day.
He chats with people.
Yeah, I would have loved that.
I would have.
And I think it sounds really cool.
And like, just being in this room is like fun to hear you.
It's fun to hear you guys talk about it.
Yeah.
I'm not convinced.
Shifty, I know we can't hear you, but just speak loud enough.
Okay, you got it.
Go.
I'm kind of glad I didn't go.
Okay.
Because I don't think I would have been able to appreciate it.
Okay.
I don't think I'm old enough.
I made you work the whole time.
No, I don't have enough life experience.
Shifty, we could be getting content right now.
Yeah, where's the camera?
He's just captioning everything.
I just don't think I have enough life experience yet to appreciate doing cocaine in the desert yet.
That's a very reductive version of the experience.
But that deserves kind of proof, you know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I would like love to do it when I get older and like could handle it better, but I would have, you guys would have left.
I would have been in the middle of the desert alone and I would have fallen apart.
That's fair.
Nah, there's no way.
That's fair.
There's literally no way.
People look out, but that's no, this is okay.
Literally set up a lemonade stand in the park today.
You are a burner.
This is halfway there.
Well, I charge money.
Shub?
I would have been there just babysitting Shifty the whole time.
But no, I feel like I would have, I'm not ready for it yet either.
Okay.
I'm still too young.
Okay, wow.
That's really interesting.
That's it.
I'm like fascinated by it.
Why do you guys think that I said I wanted to go?
Fucking these guys didn't.
He got more mad at me.
Because we didn't believe you.
Yeah.
You didn't believe me saying I want to go.
Yeah, we didn't believe.
That's a broken foot, but it's all good.
Oh, it's all good.
What happened?
Did you walk here today?
I didn't walk here.
No, I ubered.
He's fine.
He was partying the whole night.
He's good, bro.
He's good now.
Cassetta, what are you thinking?
You think you want to go to Burning Man?
I'm open to it.
Son, I don't think we're good PR for Burning Me.
No, but maybe this is good.
Maybe this is how we maintain it.
Yeah, don't go.
Yeah.
Maybe you guys should never know too.
I was concerned a little bit.
And I was like, I know we're going to come back and we're going to talk about our experiences there.
And we're probably without a doubt the biggest podcast that's ever spoken about Burning Man right now.
This episode.
Yeah.
It's not to say that people don't know about their sketches and all this kind of thing.
Like, people make jokes about it every single year afterwards.
But, like, we're probably the biggest platform that said this was awesome.
So, a little part of me was like, are we, we better speak about this in the right way so that we create an expectation that people will want to experience, but that is also true to the experience.
And if everybody so far that's listened to us was like, fuck that.
Then maybe we did the right thing.
Yeah, we took it.
Yeah, we told it.
Totally okay.
Burning man is safe.
I'm okay with that.
Burning man is safe.
There's also something Al said at the oh no, we're ending it.
We're back, people.
I'll just tell you.
I had to.
I had to.
We drove out together.
We turned his motherfucker down.
No, no, no.
Go, What do you got, Jack Sparrow?
You got it.
I mean, Jack Sparrow, my bad.
Fuck you, Mark.
Okay, go.
Oh, yo, can I tell you the funniest shit?
The funniest shit is.
You should have told me.
When you lost to Hawkinson, okay.
No, you lost.
Hold on.
We're getting off the elevator, and this Hugo, this bad bitch is on the elevator with his dogs or something.
It's me, Mark, Vala, and this girl.
Girl's very cute.
And Vala, I guess, is trying to impress the girl.
Mark says something.
I don't know who she is.
Very pretty girl.
Where are we?
Listen here.
Before we go, we're not talking about Burning Man.
Two Burning Man.
This is the last day we're together.
A week before.
For some reason, Mark says something, and for some reason, Vala wants to shit on Mark to impress this girl.
And Vala says something to Mark, like, oh, whatever, bro, you sound like a fucking idiot.
Just bullying.
Mark is just kind of like walking his bike casually.
And Vala and the girl are like this.
And then Mark, after a few seconds, just calls out.
He goes, imagine being 5'6.
It was so funny because I was, as Vala said that, I was like, yo, why are you shitting on Mark to impress this girl?
You need to do that.
No, that's not necessary.
And then Mark.
No fucking emotion on his face whatsoever, just casually walking his bike.
Yo, imagine being 5'6.
That's all he said.
Bro, that shit was crazy.
This is why I hate Mark.
Unbelievable.
I felt bad.
I didn't even felt bad.
I've never seen any shit like that all in my life, dude.
This is like the eighth time that day Vala was just saying some like little snarky persnickety thing to me.
Just like, oh, Mark, you loser.
Oh, shut up, Dork.
Like, he was just bugging me all day.
All day.
This is my Columbine, bro.
It's like, I was really clevelable.
That shit felt amazing.
Did he kill me in three words, bro?
I was like, oh, that shit was so up.
But what is it like, though?
No, what did you want to say to Al before?
No, real talk is not that bad.
What is that?
I'm taller than him.
Hey, I thought I'd seven, thank you.
I'll steal sex appeals.
Okay, tell us, what were you saying to Al?
No, it's something Al said at the airport.
I'll let you finish it, but I'll remind you.
He said when he's at Burning Man, he doesn't feel black.
Oh, yeah, I didn't really want to say that.
You did say that, though.
No, he didn't say that.
Yo, you know, Miles is racist.
No, Hold on, hold on.
Shifty, get back on the camera.
I'm like, have I been more have I been more sure Miles is racist?
For the first moment, Al's life, Al just feels like a person without an identity that's defined by his race.
And Miles listens to the information and goes, You wish!
You wish that was the case.
You wish, you just out at Al, and then Al goes, Yeah, I didn't want to say that.
That's him laughing.
Bullshit, Miles.
Miles laughs at the idea.
Nah, nah, I just, I just like, I'm going to Burning Man next year to make sure you never feel that way.
I'm not racist.
I wasn't sure if I'd be able to articulate it that well because I don't want it to sound like I'm very proud of being black and I like that as part of my identity.
But I was afraid that if I articulate it wrong, it sounds like, oh, I'm happy that I didn't feel black at Burning Man.
Is it?
Let me ask you, and I'm trying to help for real.
Is it you don't feel like everybody's looking at you like, oh, hey, there's a black guy?
Like, if you're the majority, if you're a white dude walking through most places in America, it's just like, oh, hey, there's a guy.
And then if you see a black person or a brown person or whatever, you're like, oh, there's a street.
Brown person is a black person.
But luckily here, there's no streets.
You can't supply us.
That's common.
Well, even if he steals, I'm giving.
Hey, man.
I don't care.
I'm gifting.
I don't know.
Maybe it's like.
Is that it?
It's not?
What if it's like when you okay?
What if it's like there are certain things that may be frowned upon to do because of your identity?
And in a place like this, you feel free to do them because that's not what you're leading with.
Not really.
It's kind of more so I just wasn't reminded.
I feel that in society every single day, there's just like little minor things that just constantly remind me.
Oh, yeah.
You know, like you get reminded that, oh, you're black or, oh, you know, why you dress this way or why, like, just those subtle things.
And I just didn't feel it at all on that.
Wouldn't it be nice if you just said that in the beginning?
It's hard to explain that.
No, but it's hard to explain it.
But yeah, I just don't feel it.
But you would often say you'd be like, I hate blacks.
That's all I can say.
That's why.
That's why I'm not going to be able to do that.
You open that door and he's like, I'm going to.
Remember it?
You'd be like, and then they come here, they call it the playoff, not the bio.
And there is no black kid.
Do you have like a play on words like that?
Anyway.
Yeah.
Hard Truths About Identity00:03:02
Damn, Brad.
Did we ruin Burning Man's son?
Like everybody we talked about, they don't want to go.
Yep.
Now it's down to what, 40,000 next year?
Miles is very little blacks there.
So I said I want to go.
I think they are.
Some of them are tall though.
Damn it.
What is your outfit going to be next year?
Can I take that guy?
Can you move your point?
I'm trying to see the show.
Your hat is so tall.
He just goes to Joann's and buys all the white fabric.
What, dude?
You can't do miles like that.
What are you talking about?
You know, Miles is therapy drug.
What?
Okay.
This is your best friend.
I held his secret in his chicken box.
I held his secret in a chicken box for days, weeks.
He called me three days before.
He goes, his face is.
I held your secret.
What'd you go for?
No, no one has service.
Wait, you didn't tell us?
Yeah, he called.
He goes, yo, is anyone else sick at the studio?
And I go, no.
And then he texts me the next day.
He goes, hey, don't talk about me being sick.
Never happened.
I never talked about that.
He's a good friend for that.
He's a good guy.
Good friend to some people.
All right, well, we're stretching this out.
Unless we, what we really should do is fucking take a Tesla pill right now and then reflect on it and all over again.
Let's go.
You guys want some?
Stop.
Stop it.
Let's stop it.
He's waiting for you to pull it.
Don't do anything.
Let's just end this.
Stop it.
I'll pull it out right now.
Stop it.
End this.
Hold on, because I kind of want to go to dinner with my wife on a Tesla without her knowing.