Flagrant - Andrew Schulz & Akaash Singh - Brazilian Dike Causes Cliff Collapse
Aired: 2022-01-11
Duration: 02:33:04


=== Pumas And The Flip Haircut (14:27) ===

[00:00:05]  No, I think I started pumas when I was younger.
[00:00:07]  I had convinced myself I was that delusional.
[00:00:08]  Pumas and then what was the other thing?
[00:00:12]  Oh, the flip haircut.
[00:00:13]  Yeah.
[00:00:13]  I thought I started both.
[00:00:14]  How do you think you start pumas if you bought them at a store?
[00:00:16]  Because I didn't think anybody was buying them like that.
[00:00:19]  And then when I bought them, everybody started wearing them.
[00:00:22]  And I didn't know about that theory where like you get a car and then all of a sudden you see your car all over the place.
[00:00:26]  Oh, yeah, yeah.
[00:00:27]  Because I didn't even know about pumas.
[00:00:28]  Yeah.
[00:00:29]  And then I bought them and I was like, let me start a new trend with sneakers.
[00:00:32]  And then I just started seeing them everywhere.
[00:00:34]  And I convinced myself it was me.
[00:00:36]  Why did it fade so fast?
[00:00:37]  Say again.
[00:00:38]  Why did it fade so fast?
[00:00:38]  You moved on?
[00:00:39]  Because you moved on?
[00:00:40]  Fam.
[00:00:40]  Fam, everybody's on Pumas right now.
[00:00:42]  Jay on my dick.
[00:00:44]  You know what I'm saying?
[00:00:45]  Jay-Z on my dick.
[00:00:46]  Listen, I have not seen you in Pumas the entire time we've been friends.
[00:00:49]  Once all these gobblers, once all these sharks, once all those sharks came out, you know what I mean?
[00:00:55]  Biting, chomping away at your boy.
[00:00:58]  How old are you?
[00:00:58]  Say what?
[00:00:59]  Seven years old.
[00:01:01]  Seven years old.
[00:01:02]  I brought them shits on Broadway and the Aster Place, dude.
[00:01:04]  I was down walking in the neighborhood.
[00:01:06]  Thought I should start a new trend.
[00:01:06]  Light up.
[00:01:07]  Pumas.
[00:01:07]  Light up in.
[00:01:09]  I was never on that light up shit.
[00:01:10]  I was never on the Rollies.
[00:01:12]  I never had the Rolls.
[00:01:14]  I'm not a Rollies, dog.
[00:01:14]  You can't respect me on that.
[00:01:16]  I was a real man with rollerblades out here fucking bitches.
[00:01:19]  Yo, yo, yo.
[00:01:20]  Sam, square wheels.
[00:01:21]  Same, dog.
[00:01:22]  Same.
[00:01:22]  Never doing no tricks, mad pussy.
[00:01:24]  He's some fat kid on rollerblades.
[00:01:25]  Oh, we're not doing that.
[00:01:26]  LA gear.
[00:01:27]  Y'all had LA gear.
[00:01:28]  I fucked with LA gear.
[00:01:29]  Not had that.
[00:01:30]  Yo, never the lights, though.
[00:01:32]  Okay, you had the LA gear without the lights.
[00:01:34]  I had Payless.
[00:01:39]  Yo, no, the whole thing about them was that it had lights.
[00:01:42]  Oh, I know.
[00:01:43]  Wait, yours is.
[00:01:45]  I'm the one fucking Indian kid, no lights on his LA gear.
[00:01:48]  Everybody else looking like Diwali.
[00:01:49]  I'm just sitting here fucking dim.
[00:01:50]  No, dim walking.
[00:01:52]  Yeah.
[00:01:52]  God.
[00:01:53]  What about British Knights?
[00:01:54]  BKs.
[00:01:55]  I had a pair of BKs.
[00:01:56]  No, never did it.
[00:01:57]  One of the expensive shoes I had as a kid.
[00:01:58]  Never did it.
[00:01:59]  Never did it.
[00:02:00]  Reebok pumps, the cross trainers.
[00:02:02]  I had to rebock with the cartridge to inflate them.
[00:02:08]  You're talking about pumps.
[00:02:09]  Pumps.
[00:02:09]  No, no, no.
[00:02:10]  That's what the pumps are.
[00:02:11]  No, no, no.
[00:02:11]  You do it with your hands.
[00:02:12]  Yeah, you would pump them off with the thing.
[00:02:14]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:02:14]  You never had the little portable cartridge.
[00:02:16]  Just the most Jewish ass shit I ever heard.
[00:02:18]  That shit fell off by then.
[00:02:20]  No, So you had to carry around a fucking little thing that's P-Y-O-P out there.
[00:02:26]  You got a little vibrator.
[00:02:27]  You would bring it onto the kickball field.
[00:02:30]  Pick the ball.
[00:02:31]  I would take that shit out of my pocket.
[00:02:34]  Now you probably inhale that shit, too.
[00:02:37]  Yeah, did you try to sell that as cool?
[00:02:39]  Trying to bring it.
[00:02:40]  Fucking dork.
[00:02:41]  Hold on, guys.
[00:02:43]  You had to do a pit stuff?
[00:02:44]  Yeah, it was on back.
[00:02:45]  You need to do that.
[00:02:46]  Had a little fucking seal.
[00:02:48]  I started Puma, man.
[00:02:49]  And then that flip haircut, too.
[00:02:51]  That flip haircut was really awful.
[00:02:53]  Don't take credit for that one.
[00:02:54]  Yeah, it was bad.
[00:02:55]  It was like you gel your hair forward and then you flip up the front.
[00:02:59]  Yeah, it was like on some Tin Tin shit.
[00:03:01]  Remember Tin Tin?
[00:03:02]  I still love Tin Tins.
[00:03:03]  With that little white dog said that Type Time ricked up my car.
[00:03:06]  Yeah, Marco's shit.
[00:03:08]  Tin Tin was an explorer.
[00:03:09]  He was the ball.
[00:03:10]  I just ordered a Tin Tin shirt.
[00:03:12]  You also like Asterisk and Obilisk.
[00:03:14]  Yeah, bro.
[00:03:15]  I love them.
[00:03:15]  I don't know what the fuck that was.
[00:03:16]  That is.
[00:03:16]  I do.
[00:03:17]  But when we was on that 1010 shit, Tin Tin was legit.
[00:03:19]  But yeah, that haircut was absolutely awful.
[00:03:21]  But I did start it.
[00:03:23]  Alex, question.
[00:03:24]  If you could be a white person, do you know what white person you would be?
[00:03:27]  Like, haircuts and all?
[00:03:30]  Do you have an answer to this, or is this a question you asked?
[00:03:32]  He was saying that he liked to flip.
[00:03:34]  And I'm just wondering.
[00:03:35]  Don't answer in this question his entire life.
[00:03:38]  I'd probably go like Justin Timbalik because he went through the corn roll phase.
[00:03:42]  He went through the denim thing.
[00:03:43]  He was dying the fucking edges.
[00:03:46]  All the frosted tips.
[00:03:46]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:03:47]  Yeah, frosted up.
[00:03:48]  I started that.
[00:03:48]  I tried a whole bunch of different things.
[00:03:49]  Oh, work?
[00:03:50]  I had bleached my hair as well.
[00:03:51]  Yeah.
[00:03:51]  And then I would have ended up with you would have been JT.
[00:03:54]  Yeah.
[00:03:55]  Oh, he's had a great time.
[00:03:56]  He's had great looks.
[00:03:59]  That's a good one.
[00:03:59]  If you were a black guy, who would you be?
[00:04:01]  What kind of black guy?
[00:04:02]  God, I never really thought about that.
[00:04:04]  Liar.
[00:04:05]  If I was a black guy, who would I be?
[00:04:07]  Yeah.
[00:04:09]  So, who's the coolest black guy?
[00:04:10]  Is what you're trying to ask?
[00:04:12]  Oh, that's good.
[00:04:12]  Okay, because that's where the question is: who do you think?
[00:04:16]  Not necessarily.
[00:04:17]  But, coolest black guy.
[00:04:18]  We're talking about aesthetic here, right?
[00:04:20]  We're not talking.
[00:04:20]  I'm saying, like, it's not who would you want to be.
[00:04:22]  It's like, who would you be?
[00:04:23]  Like, what?
[00:04:24]  What would my black guy be?
[00:04:26]  Yeah, if you woke up black tomorrow, what would you look like?
[00:04:29]  Oh, we already know that.
[00:04:32]  We already saw this.
[00:04:33]  Who's the guy that I look just like?
[00:04:34]  Oh, Lloyd.
[00:04:35]  Yeah, Lloyd.
[00:04:36]  He's like Lloyd.
[00:04:38]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:04:39]  Javel, who's here right now, made the PowerPoint.
[00:04:43]  He was so convinced that I look exactly like Lloyd, he made a PowerPoint as an adult.
[00:04:48]  He took time away from his job at Expedia to make a PowerPoint of me and Lloyd and how similar we look.
[00:04:54]  And we do look similar.
[00:04:54]  Yeah, you do.
[00:04:55]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:04:55]  But I don't think that I would be that.
[00:04:57]  Who would I be as a black person?
[00:04:58]  Who would you want to be?
[00:04:59]  Because what you're asking is not who you are.
[00:05:01]  It's who would you want to be?
[00:05:02]  Right.
[00:05:02]  And I don't want to be Michael B. Jordan.
[00:05:04]  I don't want to be.
[00:05:04]  I'm trying to think.
[00:05:05]  I can give you one.
[00:05:05]  Yeah, go, go, go.
[00:05:06]  Idris Elba.
[00:05:07]  Yo, Idris.
[00:05:08]  That mother's brother.
[00:05:09]  That always brings up.
[00:05:10]  Idris.
[00:05:12]  That's your guy.
[00:05:14]  Hey, Idris Elba.
[00:05:15]  Hey, hey, look, jealous.
[00:05:18]  Jealous.
[00:05:19]  You're black and you're not even trying to be in.
[00:05:21]  Is wrong with you, bro?
[00:05:22]  He's right there.
[00:05:24]  You couldn't get to that level.
[00:05:26]  The lips don't go that high.
[00:05:29]  Idris is cool, but like, if you could be any black, dude, you just know, but that's not the question.
[00:05:32]  Like, build your avatar with yourself.
[00:05:33]  No, girl, we have a different question.
[00:05:36]  It's a different question.
[00:05:37]  Who is the guy?
[00:05:39]  That's it.
[00:05:39]  Right there.
[00:05:39]  That's the guy, dog.
[00:05:40]  That is not you.
[00:05:41]  Yo, why aren't you going for that?
[00:05:43]  That's me.
[00:05:43]  Look at me right now.
[00:05:44]  I'm Luther.
[00:05:45]  I'm Luther.
[00:05:46]  Look at me right now.
[00:05:47]  I came in dressed like Luther, except with some converse on.
[00:05:50]  But if I was black, I wouldn't.
[00:05:52]  I'd be with the Bruno Cuccinellis making your mom's pussies wet.
[00:05:55]  Brunela Crusinelli.
[00:05:56]  Not you Jones.
[00:05:58]  For everybody listening.
[00:06:00]  You know?
[00:06:00]  Yeah, nah.
[00:06:01]  Nah, I'd be Marshawn Lynch.
[00:06:03]  Marshawn Lynn.
[00:06:04]  That would be the guy I would want to be.
[00:06:05]  Who I am as a black guy is like, you know, when Steve is turning to Stefan, the first step out of six.
[00:06:11]  Oh, wow.
[00:06:12]  Steve Urkel, the Stefano.
[00:06:13]  It wasn't all the way done and he had to go back.
[00:06:15]  I'm step two.
[00:06:16]  Okay.
[00:06:18]  That's who you would be as your natural transition.
[00:06:20]  That's the natural me as a black guy.
[00:06:22]  Nah, what is what is a black guy?
[00:06:25]  Stefan shouts.
[00:06:27]  That's pretty close.
[00:06:28]  I'm trying to think who you are as a black guy.
[00:06:29]  No, no, there's a version of you.
[00:06:31]  What's that black guy?
[00:06:32]  He's on ER Harper Hill.
[00:06:35]  Yo, look at me.
[00:06:36]  I was thinking.
[00:06:37]  I think he might be Harper Hill, bro.
[00:06:39]  I couldn't think of his name, but that's who I was like.
[00:06:41]  It might be this guy.
[00:06:42]  Yeah, that's you.
[00:06:44]  Little picture.
[00:06:45]  Okay.
[00:06:46]  There you go.
[00:06:46]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:06:47]  That's good.
[00:06:48]  I can see that.
[00:06:49]  That's good.
[00:06:50]  Is that the guy from ER you were thinking of?
[00:06:52]  That's funny because that thought crossed my mind.
[00:06:53]  He was in a basketball movie, too.
[00:06:55]  Probably.
[00:06:55]  He's been a lot of shit.
[00:06:56]  He wrote a book.
[00:06:57]  I can see as Jesse Williams.
[00:06:59]  All right, I'll take the fuck out of that.
[00:07:00]  Hey, hey, thanks, Al.
[00:07:02]  He's just like, what's later, bro?
[00:07:05]  Can I be Tyler the Creator?
[00:07:07]  Who is he?
[00:07:10]  Anthony Hamilton.
[00:07:12]  Anthony Hamilton.
[00:07:13]  It's almost like he baited that often.
[00:07:15]  Anthony Hamilton.
[00:07:16]  Who's Anthony Hamilton?
[00:07:18]  What the fuck?
[00:07:21]  He's so fucked up.
[00:07:22]  Charlene.
[00:07:23]  Anthony Hamilton.
[00:07:26]  Yo, Anthony Hamilton could go, dude.
[00:07:28]  I was thinking Anthony Anderson.
[00:07:30]  No, no.
[00:07:31]  I was thinking a guy from Black.
[00:07:32]  Yeah, that's who I'm thinking about.
[00:07:34]  Black is bad.
[00:07:35]  I don't know who the fuck this guy is, bro.
[00:07:37]  Who's this man?
[00:07:38]  Who is this?
[00:07:39]  You don't remember Charlene?
[00:07:40]  No.
[00:07:41]  He was big in like the mid-2000s RB guy.
[00:07:45]  Like a soul.
[00:07:46]  He's just like Blue Control.
[00:07:47]  He has like a couple bangs.
[00:07:50]  Man, what the people say.
[00:07:52]  I'm good.
[00:07:52]  Okay.
[00:07:53]  So you want to be Tyler the Creator.
[00:07:55]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:07:56]  But that would be your ideal black.
[00:07:58]  Or, like Denzel Curry, or some shit, Denzel Curry.
[00:08:01]  You're not even going to be the best Denzel, you loser.
[00:08:03]  No, yeah, that's kind of the best Curry.
[00:08:05]  Yeah, okay, Al.
[00:08:09]  If you were 100% black, if you were 100%, if you didn't have the Puerto Rican part dragging you down, if you could fully experience your blackness, who would you be?
[00:08:22]  Big pun.
[00:08:26]  He just wants to eat everything, stop working out so bad.
[00:08:29]  Al tired of doing pull-ups, he had enough.
[00:08:32]  That's the best.
[00:08:33]  He's the man, and he just gets to do whatever.
[00:08:35]  Yeah, and he's dead.
[00:08:36]  Yeah, he died mad early.
[00:08:38]  Mad early.
[00:08:38]  Didn't even get it.
[00:08:39]  He barely reached 30 years old.
[00:08:40]  You know, he's a rapper that died of natural causes.
[00:08:43]  That shit is embarrassing for COVID, too.
[00:08:46]  Real talk.
[00:08:47]  Yeah.
[00:08:48]  You don't want to be that guy.
[00:08:49]  Nah.
[00:08:49]  Okay, no movie.
[00:08:50]  Who?
[00:08:50]  If you were 100% black, who would it be?
[00:08:53]  Fuck, this is hard.
[00:08:55]  I'd probably go Michael B. Michael B. Jordan.
[00:08:58]  I could see you doing a little Michael B. Jordan.
[00:09:00]  Miles, Miles, Sean King.
[00:09:05]  He's wearing a mask right now.
[00:09:07]  I know.
[00:09:07]  He's sort of a set.
[00:09:09]  No, who would you be?
[00:09:09]  If you could be any black man on the planet, who would be your version of a black man?
[00:09:15]  Who would it be?
[00:09:16]  Think deeply on this.
[00:09:18]  Go.
[00:09:18]  The Black Ranger from the 90s.
[00:09:21]  Oh, Miles committed to his virginity.
[00:09:24]  We've been doing everything to help this guy out, throwing all the LUs.
[00:09:27]  And he'd just be slamming them shit straight into the fucking payment.
[00:09:30]  The Black Ranger?
[00:09:31]  Whitest one ever.
[00:09:32]  That's the white black guy ever.
[00:09:35]  Yeah.
[00:09:36]  That's actually a white guy.
[00:09:37]  Black guys.
[00:09:40]  Come on, Miles.
[00:09:41]  There's no other black dudes.
[00:09:42]  Lil Wayne, you were saying how much you love Lil Wayne?
[00:09:45]  Yeah.
[00:09:45]  I don't want to beat him.
[00:09:46]  I don't want to be him.
[00:09:47]  You want to be short, bro.
[00:09:53]  Miles ain't getting enough wedges growing up.
[00:09:55]  Something happened where Miles feels comfortable saying these things, bro.
[00:09:58]  What the hell is going on, bro?
[00:10:00]  The Black Ranger?
[00:10:01]  I was thinking the same thing.
[00:10:02]  I didn't say it, though.
[00:10:03]  What's wrong with the sickest?
[00:10:03]  He's a sick.
[00:10:04]  Wait, why was he so sick?
[00:10:05]  Like, yo, was the Yellow Ranger Asian, bro?
[00:10:08]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:10:11]  Yeah, I didn't give a fuck.
[00:10:13]  Okay, go, go.
[00:10:13]  No, he was just sick.
[00:10:15]  White Ranger was evil, too.
[00:10:17]  Yeah.
[00:10:18]  Think about that.
[00:10:18]  They knew.
[00:10:19]  I just wanted to be him.
[00:10:20]  Like, growing up, like, everyone was like, oh, I want to be the Blue Ranger, Red Ranger.
[00:10:23]  Like, I wanted to be them, but I was like, the Black Ranger's the coolest.
[00:10:25]  I just can't be him.
[00:10:28]  I just knew he was the coolest.
[00:10:30]  I just know that I just because he was black.
[00:10:32]  And now that you could be any black man ever, you feel like the Black Ranger would be the one.
[00:10:36]  Yeah, he's the coolest of them all.
[00:10:38]  All right.
[00:10:38]  Who's your second pick?
[00:10:41]  I don't even want to know who's saying the guy from Reading Rainbow.
[00:10:47]  I mean, the guy from Reading Rainbow.
[00:10:53]  Lamar Burton better than Black Ranger for Black.
[00:10:57]  Yeah.
[00:10:58]  Very easy.
[00:10:59]  Oh, he said very easy.
[00:11:01]  He got this.
[00:11:01]  Lot.
[00:11:01]  Can we guess first?
[00:11:03]  Okay.
[00:11:04]  We guess who is Black Tough?
[00:11:08]  Okay, go.
[00:11:09]  Laverne Cox.
[00:11:10]  Wait, wait, you're going.
[00:11:12]  That's mine.
[00:11:13]  Yeah.
[00:11:15]  Hold on.
[00:11:15]  You had Laverne Cox.
[00:11:17]  Okay.
[00:11:18]  You remember Richard Pryor's manager who stole all his money?
[00:11:21]  Who's that?
[00:11:22]  Don King.
[00:11:23]  That's it.
[00:11:23]  Donnie King.
[00:11:24]  Donnie King.
[00:11:26]  What, motherfucker?
[00:11:28]  Okay, okay.
[00:11:29]  What do you think, Alex?
[00:11:32]  That's who he aspired to.
[00:11:33]  I think he would pick Drake just so he could hold on to being Jewish.
[00:11:36]  Oh, actual Drake.
[00:11:38]  That's an actual good one.
[00:11:39]  Very fair.
[00:11:40]  There was a time where people actually thought I was.
[00:11:44]  They got a lot of shout outs for that.
[00:11:46]  Did they know you would play Drake?
[00:11:48]  And who do I think that he would be?
[00:11:50]  Yeah.
[00:11:50]  Gonzo.
[00:11:53]  The puppet.
[00:11:55]  He's purple.
[00:11:57]  He's probably.
[00:11:58]  He's a black Sesame Street character, right?
[00:12:01]  Okay, Godzilla.
[00:12:01]  Who do you think it is?
[00:12:05]  He's dressed like a pimp right now.
[00:12:06]  It's dumb, right?
[00:12:08]  I'm sorry, David.
[00:12:09]  That is dumb.
[00:12:10]  No, go to the top left.
[00:12:11]  Go to the top left when he was at my wedding.
[00:12:13]  Go and go to you.
[00:12:15]  I'm so sorry.
[00:12:16]  You look amazing.
[00:12:17]  You looked amazing.
[00:12:18]  I'm not going to lie.
[00:12:19]  That's how all your gift money went.
[00:12:20]  It literally went to his suit.
[00:12:21]  You're welcome.
[00:12:23]  Okay.
[00:12:23]  Now, Dove, who would you be if you were black?
[00:12:25]  Who is it?
[00:12:25]  You're uncat.
[00:12:26]  I'm Mike Larry.
[00:12:28]  Bad boys one.
[00:12:29]  Mike Lowry?
[00:12:30]  Mike Lowry.
[00:12:32]  Michael Larry, dog.
[00:12:34]  You make a Jewish.
[00:12:35]  Fucking Michael Lowry.
[00:12:37]  God damn that.
[00:12:38]  Michael Larry.
[00:12:39]  Mike Larry?
[00:12:40]  Michael Larry Davis.
[00:12:41]  Michael Larry.
[00:12:44]  You don't even know the black guy.
[00:12:46]  That's pretty good.
[00:12:47]  Come on.
[00:12:49]  Pretty good.
[00:12:50]  God damn it, Doug.
[00:12:51]  Bothered me.
[00:12:52]  Michael Lowry.
[00:12:52]  Sammy Davis became Jewish.
[00:12:54]  Oh, shit.
[00:12:56]  That's a good one.
[00:12:57]  Yeah, no, I can see that.
[00:12:58]  And Dove can do a little of everything.
[00:13:00]  Yeah.
[00:13:00]  A little sing, a little dance.
[00:13:01]  I think so.
[00:13:02]  Entertain.
[00:13:03]  I just don't want him to hang on to the Jewish thing.
[00:13:05]  Just pick a real black guy, bro.
[00:13:06]  Don't be a black guy.
[00:13:07]  If you even try to make Michael Lowry Jewish.
[00:13:09]  Mike Lowry.
[00:13:10]  Yeah.
[00:13:10]  Mike Lowry.
[00:13:12]  Black Muslim.
[00:13:12]  Go.
[00:13:13]  Who is it?
[00:13:13]  Ooh.
[00:13:14]  Ooh.
[00:13:15]  Mr. Farrakhan.
[00:13:16]  Yeah, Honorable Lord Farrakhan.
[00:13:17]  Okay, hold on.
[00:13:18]  Lord Francis Florence.
[00:13:20]  I'm watching a lot of Game of Thrones.
[00:13:22]  I got a Death Eater, bro.
[00:13:23]  I'm watching a lot of Game of Drones.
[00:13:25]  I assume everyone's Lord, bro.
[00:13:27]  Not a Death Eater.
[00:13:29]  Lucarikon.
[00:13:32]  He got knighted, did he?
[00:13:33]  He got knighted.
[00:13:34]  Nah, he believes in Pure Blood, though.
[00:13:35]  You got that right.
[00:13:38]  Okay, go.
[00:13:39]  Non-Jewish black, non-Jewish Muslim.
[00:13:42]  Doesn't have to be Muslim.
[00:13:44]  Muslim is easy.
[00:13:44]  If he's Muslim black, there's two options.
[00:13:46]  Independence Day, Will Smith?
[00:13:48]  I'm not picking all the Will Smiths, but you're picking characters of a person.
[00:13:52]  That's really good.
[00:13:53]  Because I started this by saying, like, if you could pick your avatar in the metaverse, so you've got to pick your hair.
[00:13:59]  I was looking at Al.
[00:14:00]  He's talking about the hair flip that he would like on his white guy.
[00:14:04]  I'm like, I wouldn't like it on my white guy.
[00:14:06]  What are you talking about?
[00:14:07]  If you're young, you're white.
[00:14:08]  Let us point out that face because this is actually really fun.
[00:14:11]  That was a point of black in the metaverse.
[00:14:12]  Brilliant question.
[00:14:13]  You can absolutely be black in the metaverse.
[00:14:14]  You can be whatever you want in the metaverse, but let's make it as if you're an Asian.
[00:14:18]  So who?
[00:14:20]  Who is it?
[00:14:21]  Yeah, it's about to be.
[00:14:22]  So who would you be?
[00:14:24]  It has to be alive.
[00:14:25]  Otherwise, it's Bruce Lee.
[00:14:27]  Oh, you're going to go at the best.
[00:14:29]  He's very easy.
[00:14:30]  So if it has to go alive, that's different.

=== Choosing Your Metaverse Avatar (08:35) ===

[00:14:32]  Alive.
[00:14:33]  No, no, it could be live or dead Asian.
[00:14:35]  Go.
[00:14:35]  Oh, I got one.
[00:14:36]  Go.
[00:14:36]  Any long-haired Asian dude.
[00:14:38]  I've never met a man.
[00:14:38]  Steve Aoki.
[00:14:39]  Steve Aoki.
[00:14:40]  Lit.
[00:14:40]  I've never met a long-haired Asian dude that wasn't chill as fuck.
[00:14:42]  Every long-haired Asian dude is cool.
[00:14:44]  Bro, 100%.
[00:14:45]  Justin Chan.
[00:14:46]  Do you know who he is?
[00:14:47]  No.
[00:14:47]  He made Blue Bayou.
[00:14:49]  The movie.
[00:14:49]  Do you guys know what this is?
[00:14:51]  I was watching this on the flight to Portland.
[00:14:55]  Bawling my fucking eyes.
[00:14:58]  Bawling my fucking eyes out.
[00:14:59]  I mean, absolutely amazing movie.
[00:15:02]  Is this when you got put in the middle seat?
[00:15:03]  No, this is not the middle seat.
[00:15:05]  That was on the way back.
[00:15:06]  This is when I was going there, right?
[00:15:09]  Watching it and blowing my eyes out.
[00:15:11]  And here's the thing that was interesting about it.
[00:15:13]  Wasn't on my TV.
[00:15:17]  Okay?
[00:15:18]  It was on the guy next to me's TV.
[00:15:20]  And I had to wait for him to go to sleep so I could turn the subtitles on on his CD.
[00:15:25]  I don't know why I was committed to not watching it on mine, but at one point I needed to know what was going on.
[00:15:29]  So I Wikipedia the plot line for the movie and I stopped reading the plot when it was at the point that I was at.
[00:15:36]  Exactly.
[00:15:36]  I just had to catch.
[00:15:37]  I'm crying without even here.
[00:15:39]  I DM'd the dude.
[00:15:40]  I was like, dude, this movie is so fucking good.
[00:15:42]  I just watched the whole thing on not my screen.
[00:15:44]  I don't know a single line that's in the movie.
[00:15:46]  And I'm bawling from the best.
[00:15:51]  To the best.
[00:15:52]  No, no subs till the end.
[00:15:54]  Jeez.
[00:15:54]  Dude, it was so good.
[00:15:55]  Blue Bayou.
[00:15:56]  Yeah, Justin Chan.
[00:15:57]  Yeah, long hair.
[00:15:58]  Now he's long air, but in the movie.
[00:16:00]  You cry more when you're flying and watching a movie.
[00:16:02]  Yeah, 100%.
[00:16:03]  I get emotional in the sky.
[00:16:05]  I get emotional in the sky.
[00:16:06]  No, but apparently I get it.
[00:16:07]  I feel vulnerable.
[00:16:07]  I'm like, I watched it.
[00:16:08]  Do you have a Lion?
[00:16:09]  Have you ever watched Lion?
[00:16:10]  Lion.
[00:16:11]  Lion.
[00:16:12]  What is that?
[00:16:12]  Is that about Jews?
[00:16:14]  Yeah.
[00:16:15]  Oh, Lion.
[00:16:16]  Oh, Lion.
[00:16:17]  Yeah, Oh, man.
[00:16:24]  But yeah, no, airplane movies, they do that.
[00:16:26]  What do you think it is?
[00:16:26]  Is that like the astronaut complex?
[00:16:28]  Like, you look at the earth and you realize we're all just one thing.
[00:16:30]  It's apparently a thing.
[00:16:31]  People crave, like, they drink tomato juice more than anything else in a flight.
[00:16:34]  They crave salty things and they cry more now.
[00:16:35]  Apparently, your taste buds get decreased too.
[00:16:37]  Really?
[00:16:38]  When you're up in the sky?
[00:16:39]  Apparently, that's what I heard.
[00:16:40]  Not mine.
[00:16:40]  That's just what airlines be saying so they can excuse their shitty face.
[00:16:45]  Your mouth is broken.
[00:16:48]  No, I don't know what happens.
[00:16:49]  I just get, maybe I'm like, shut up.
[00:16:53]  Maybe I'm like vulnerable or something.
[00:16:56]  But when I'm in the sky, I think there's something that happens in the sky.
[00:17:11]  I'm just walking in the combos like Kramer, bro.
[00:17:13]  What the fuck?
[00:17:16]  But do you find yourselves getting emotional too?
[00:17:18]  Because I remember I've seen you cry many times.
[00:17:21]  I cry all the fucking time on a plane.
[00:17:22]  I only cry on a plane.
[00:17:24]  Really?
[00:17:25]  No, you can't let it look.
[00:17:26]  I saw Spider-Man twice, didn't cry.
[00:17:28]  And then the third time?
[00:17:29]  Well, I haven't seen it a third time.
[00:17:30]  But I'm just saying.
[00:17:31]  So what the fuck are you bringing this up?
[00:17:32]  Everybody saw it.
[00:17:33]  Everybody said they cried for Spider-Man, and I was like, ah, I didn't.
[00:17:36]  Ah, but if you were on a plane, then you would cry.
[00:17:39]  I got you.
[00:17:39]  I got you.
[00:17:40]  Even though it's not even available on planes yet.
[00:17:42]  I'm just saying.
[00:17:42]  I know I would.
[00:17:43]  I just want to bring back to maybe the worst example ever given to justify an argument.
[00:17:49]  Okay, Coco.
[00:17:51]  I cried on a plane, but then I watched it at home and I didn't cry.
[00:17:55]  I cried watching Coco.
[00:17:56]  Son, I don't know.
[00:17:56]  It's something about playing.
[00:17:57]  But you tear up because I don't actually cry, but I tear the fuck up.
[00:18:00]  Oh, you cry on the inside.
[00:18:02]  I cry on the inside.
[00:18:02]  My eyes fill up with tears.
[00:18:03]  And then I'll be trying to blink.
[00:18:06]  Just be a person, and it all happened.
[00:18:07]  You cry like a gay.
[00:18:09]  I cry.
[00:18:10]  I cry, cry.
[00:18:11]  Oh, yeah.
[00:18:11]  It's not everything.
[00:18:12]  Oh, like Mexico City cry.
[00:18:13]  You know why?
[00:18:15]  Oh, yeah, like that.
[00:18:18]  We talked about this.
[00:18:19]  No, we talked about this.
[00:18:21]  Oh, man.
[00:18:22]  Oh, yeah.
[00:18:23]  That's the last time I cried without being on a plane.
[00:18:25]  Like, we did so much mauling.
[00:18:27]  And the next day, there's the recovery portion, right?
[00:18:30]  Where you're a little bit depressed and shit.
[00:18:31]  Yeah, he's like, shit, I remember.
[00:18:33]  I just gave him my breakfast.
[00:18:34]  I was like, buddy, we'll ate this.
[00:18:36]  After breakfast, we all went to the spa.
[00:18:37]  So we're chilling in this pool.
[00:18:39]  We're going in and out of the sauna, coming back by the pool, right?
[00:18:42]  Al brings his speaker down to the pool.
[00:18:45]  Fucking Puerto Rican.
[00:18:46]  It's got to be loud no matter where they are.
[00:18:48]  Like he was Puerto Rican across international lines.
[00:18:50]  Playing American.
[00:18:51]  Boombox.
[00:18:52]  Even the Mexicans were like shut you up.
[00:18:54]  He was playing the R ⁇ B in his feels.
[00:18:56]  Fat black bitches sang it, bro.
[00:18:58]  And there was just Mexicans leaving the pool.
[00:19:00]  They're like, I don't want to be around this shit no more.
[00:19:02]  And it's just four of us.
[00:19:03]  And then all of a sudden, Alex has one towel over his shoulders.
[00:19:09]  And he separates himself.
[00:19:13]  He goes a few feet away from us.
[00:19:15]  And then all of a sudden, I see him take this towel from his shoulders and then just drape it over the top of his head.
[00:19:20]  Like Cody, bro.
[00:19:21]  Game six.
[00:19:22]  I think he's like a Geto.
[00:19:24]  I was like, what's that?
[00:19:25]  I said, are you crying?
[00:19:27]  Until I look at him, and this is all I see from behind.
[00:19:29]  I just see him like this.
[00:19:30]  I just see him go.
[00:19:39]  I was gonna have shoulders shot shaking, but that man was leaking, bro.
[00:19:45]  You know, that's the craziest part.
[00:19:46]  He started crying in the sauna.
[00:19:48]  The tears were evaporating off his face, but he was crying dust just miss into the hair.
[00:19:54]  I got a tear on my shoulder.
[00:19:55]  It's like, what the fuck?
[00:19:57]  Bro.
[00:20:00]  We lost our side.
[00:20:01]  I got you.
[00:20:01]  Oh, yeah.
[00:20:02]  I put that playlist on.
[00:20:03]  And then when Luther Vandros danced with my father for some time.
[00:20:06]  Oh, my God.
[00:20:07]  Shit gets me.
[00:20:07]  Every time.
[00:20:09]  Oh, man.
[00:20:10]  That shit was.
[00:20:11]  You were going through it, dude.
[00:20:14]  You had three different cry sections.
[00:20:16]  Yeah, it was like it would hit you and then you'd be good.
[00:20:18]  Oh, yeah.
[00:20:19]  Oh, yeah.
[00:20:19]  He hit me in the pool first.
[00:20:20]  Nobody peeped that.
[00:20:22]  That's why I got out the pool.
[00:20:23]  I was like, oh, I got to hide this.
[00:20:24]  Bro, you can't cry in the hot tub.
[00:20:26]  That's crazy.
[00:20:26]  I've never seen anyone cry.
[00:20:27]  Al has to unlock the tears.
[00:20:29]  I do.
[00:20:29]  He has to get on a plane.
[00:20:30]  He has to do Molly.
[00:20:32]  The retard has to subside.
[00:20:34]  Yeah, you have to numb the tard.
[00:20:36]  Yeah.
[00:20:37]  Sometimes that tard is too strong.
[00:20:38]  You got to alter his tard state.
[00:20:40]  Yeah.
[00:20:40]  Yeah.
[00:20:41]  So the reduced oxygen causes dehydration.
[00:20:44]  Ah, comes with a flurry of symptoms, including mood disturbances and fatigue, both of which can make a person likely to feel sad or become tearful.
[00:20:54]  Well, that makes me feel like you want something like, you know, tomato juice.
[00:20:58]  Just ginger ails, teas.
[00:21:01]  Yes, yes, yes.
[00:21:02]  It's funny because that shit just dehydrates you more.
[00:21:04]  Crying, salty drinks, all that just makes you more dehydrated.
[00:21:07]  But now I'm bums because I thought that I was having these real feelings on an airplane and they're just a complete manipulation.
[00:21:12]  Delete your DM in the outside.
[00:21:13]  Fuck, I got to tell him, bro.
[00:21:16]  He listens to the pod, too.
[00:21:17]  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:21:19]  Yeah.
[00:21:19]  So we support.
[00:21:20]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:21:21]  So I'm telling you, this movie is phenomenal, bro.
[00:21:23]  Like, I'm long-haired Asian, I'm on board.
[00:21:25]  He's not long-haired.
[00:21:26]  He's buzzed.
[00:21:26]  He's like, Nor Cal.
[00:21:28]  Now he's long haired.
[00:21:30]  But he's like NorCal, like, almost like Chicano Asian.
[00:21:33]  The guy who made free solo, David Chin, long-haired Asian.
[00:21:36]  Love it.
[00:21:37]  You're into the long-haired Asian.
[00:21:38]  That's the sickest Asian.
[00:21:39]  He's into long hair.
[00:21:41]  It's the sickest Asian.
[00:21:42]  He's the sickest Asian.
[00:21:42]  It's very funny.
[00:21:44]  You know, there's like a whole gender of them that have that.
[00:21:46]  What do you mean?
[00:21:47]  Like, the women.
[00:21:48]  Yeah, they're also teased.
[00:21:49]  I like how you didn't even bring them up at all.
[00:21:51]  Long-haired Asians are sick.
[00:21:53]  The guys.
[00:21:54]  Yeah, they dudes.
[00:21:55]  I don't want to be a girl Asian.
[00:22:00]  Why no girl Asian?
[00:22:01]  Are you fucked by some dude that looks like Mark?
[00:22:03]  Why is that?
[00:22:05]  Wait, why not?
[00:22:06]  Why no girl Asian?
[00:22:07]  No, I'd be a girl Asian.
[00:22:08]  None of us pick women.
[00:22:09]  Notice that.
[00:22:09]  None of us pick women.
[00:22:11]  Because we said, dude.
[00:22:12]  What does that mean anymore?
[00:22:15]  What does that mean, bro?
[00:22:17]  Come on, man.
[00:22:19]  Who would I be if I could be any girl?
[00:22:21]  Sandra Cameron.
[00:22:22]  Just squeezing out ballers.
[00:22:25]  You know what I mean?
[00:22:26]  Your own mom?
[00:22:26]  Yeah, be my mom so I can fuck my dad.
[00:22:29]  Oh, God.
[00:22:31]  You know what I'm saying?
[00:22:32]  Why'd you put her lady in there?
[00:22:33]  You know what I'm saying?
[00:22:34]  Why are you saying your mom before she got married?
[00:22:36]  She still doesn't say women.
[00:22:37]  She's still Sandra Cameron.
[00:22:38]  You know, my dad's on that cuck shit, bro.
[00:22:40]  Lost his memory, and then she snatched that last name off of her ID.
[00:22:44]  Oh, man.
[00:22:44]  Dickhead.
[00:22:46]  I got to check her on that shit.
[00:22:48]  Yeah, you do.
[00:22:49]  I do.
[00:22:49]  Sandra?
[00:22:50]  Yeah.
[00:22:51]  You be your own mom?
[00:22:52]  Say what?
[00:22:52]  You be your own mom?
[00:22:53]  No, I just didn't have anybody in the moment.
[00:22:55]  I went for the funniest thing I could think of, Mark.
[00:22:57]  That's crazy.
[00:22:57]  All right, guys.
[00:22:58]  Very important news.
[00:22:59]  The infamous tour is coming out for the West Coast run.
[00:23:02]  That's right.
[00:23:03]  Okay.
[00:23:03]  We're coming out to Oxnard.
[00:23:04]  Those shows are sold out.
[00:23:05]  Then going up to Sacramento.
[00:23:07]  Only a few tickets left for Sacramento.

=== Improv February Ticket Sale (02:39) ===

[00:23:08]  It's about to sell out.
[00:23:09]  Then we're going to be in Brea, California.
[00:23:11]  And of course, Coachella.
[00:23:13]  We've got the casino out there.
[00:23:14]  And then San Jose.
[00:23:16]  Make sure you check those out in January and February.
[00:23:19]  Those are the shows.
[00:23:20]  Get those tickets at theandrewschultz.com.
[00:23:22]  Remember, Sacramento, Brea, Coachella, San Jose.
[00:23:25]  Those are your chances.
[00:23:26]  Come out and see the infamous tour on the West Coast.
[00:23:30]  Go check them out.
[00:23:32]  Also, Akash, what else we got?
[00:23:34]  First of all, thank you to everybody back home.
[00:23:36]  Dallas hyenas, we sold that bitch out for the whole weekend.
[00:23:39]  It was amazing.
[00:23:39]  Thank you guys so much.
[00:23:41]  Now, next up, January 27th through 29th, I'm going to be at the Comedy Vault in Batavia, Illinois, February 3rd through 5th.
[00:23:48]  I'm going to be in Richmond, Virginia at the Sandman Comedy Club.
[00:23:51]  And we just added an LA run, a little California run.
[00:23:54]  Strap in.
[00:23:55]  The dates are February 20th in Oxnard, California at Levity Live.
[00:23:59]  February 23rd, Irvine, California at the Improv.
[00:24:02]  February 24th, Ontario, California Improv.
[00:24:05]  And February 25th, LA.
[00:24:06]  I'm going to be a Dynasty typewriter.
[00:24:08]  And obviously, March 11th, we got Vancouver Playhouse in Toronto.
[00:24:11]  We're coming April 22nd and 23rd.
[00:24:14]  Get your tickets at akashsing.com.
[00:24:16]  Now let's get back to the show.
[00:24:17]  All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second because, fellas and ladies, if you're listening, you got to do this for your man as well.
[00:24:22]  We got to get your skin on point, okay?
[00:24:25]  Far too often, dudes, we have no regimen, no routine, no lotion, nothing.
[00:24:29]  We just let our skin fall off our fucking faces because we don't think it has any value.
[00:24:34]  And then all of a sudden, we get a little older, like, damn, I wish I was taking care of my skin when I was younger.
[00:24:38]  Well, do it right now.
[00:24:40]  And geology is going to help you do that.
[00:24:41]  Okay.
[00:24:42]  Geology will create a simple and effective skincare routine just for you.
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[00:25:36]  So geology has 4,5 star customer reviews with an average customer rating of 4.8 out of 5.
[00:25:42]  They've been recognized by Men's Health, Esquire, Assman, Grooming Awards, and all the other stuff.
[00:25:47]  How are you going to do it?

=== Skincare Secrets That Change Lives (03:25) ===

[00:25:48]  You're going to take that quiz, okay?
[00:25:50]  And when you take that quiz, you're going to make sure you use that promo code Flagrant because then you're going to get a trial set for 70% off.
[00:25:57]  But that's not all.
[00:25:58]  We've made the offer extra special for the new year.
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[00:26:10]  That's a lifetime offer.
[00:26:11]  So make sure you go to geology.com.
[00:26:13]  That's G-E-O-L-O-G-I-E dot com.
[00:26:17]  Take that 30-second diagnostic quiz and make sure you get your personal skincare number and use that promo code Flagrant.
[00:26:25]  You're going to get major discounts.
[00:26:27]  Let's get back to the show.
[00:26:28]  No, no, who would I be if it was any woman, Amelia Earhart?
[00:26:32]  Flying ass bitch.
[00:26:34]  Do you know what I mean?
[00:26:36]  She couldn't even do that correctly, though.
[00:26:38]  She fucking died at the end.
[00:26:39]  I don't know she died without shit.
[00:26:40]  She died.
[00:26:41]  She could be on an island.
[00:26:42]  She could be in the Dominican Republic.
[00:26:43]  Yeah.
[00:26:44]  Living her life.
[00:26:44]  Her and Malaysia Air got the same fate.
[00:26:47]  How you can't fly better than Asians?
[00:26:50]  Did she start the stereotype about like women being bad drivers?
[00:26:53]  Had to.
[00:26:54]  Had to.
[00:26:54]  Or did that exist prior?
[00:26:56]  I don't know.
[00:26:56]  Where does that come from?
[00:26:58]  And why are they bad drivers?
[00:27:00]  Wait, what do you mean?
[00:27:01]  They should be better drivers because they're like, there's this like, they did some like crazy study about like women being like leaders and like managers and business and stuff like that.
[00:27:11]  And there it said something how like men are more confident, but women are more competent.
[00:27:16]  And the reason that is because like they overthink all their decisions.
[00:27:20]  Yes.
[00:27:20]  Because they're more insecure.
[00:27:22]  Where dudes, we're just like, nah, that's it.
[00:27:24]  We got it.
[00:27:25]  And if it's fucked up, I'll fix it later.
[00:27:27]  Exactly.
[00:27:27]  Build us Elon Musk's fucking boring company or whatever.
[00:27:32]  You know what I mean?
[00:27:32]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:27:33]  Like it sounded good.
[00:27:34]  Yeah, it's all fucked.
[00:27:35]  He'll figure it out.
[00:27:36]  Now it's just traffic below.
[00:27:38]  Motherfucker went from traffic above to traffic below.
[00:27:41]  But Amelia Earhart, man.
[00:27:43]  Oh, apparently it's Jane Jetson.
[00:27:45]  Who's that?
[00:27:45]  From the Jetsons.
[00:27:46]  Who's that?
[00:27:47]  She started the Women Are Bad Drivers Sheriff.
[00:27:49]  Ah, because her character was an awful driver.
[00:27:52]  They had like mad episodes where she was just like crashing the shit, melee air hard style, just flying around.
[00:27:57]  And she's crashing into shit like where there's a lot more room.
[00:28:00]  Madder.
[00:28:01]  Also in the because they're flying.
[00:28:02]  Like the Jetsons are not like, yo, she's bad at driving now.
[00:28:04]  It's like, yo, she's bad at driving in 2060.
[00:28:07]  Wow.
[00:28:08]  Like, they're always bad drivers.
[00:28:09]  Yeah.
[00:28:10]  Jesus.
[00:28:11]  So this is destiny.
[00:28:12]  That's the only thing they did themselves.
[00:28:14]  They don't even walk on their own.
[00:28:15]  They got the fucking treadmill taking them everywhere.
[00:28:16]  Yeah.
[00:28:17]  So the one thing they had them do manually, she fucked up.
[00:28:19]  Yeah.
[00:28:20]  Yep.
[00:28:20]  Yeah.
[00:28:20]  Why do they have automatic driving?
[00:28:21]  Yeah, I assume George hasn't got flown wherever he wanted to go.
[00:28:24]  There's a rosa.
[00:28:25]  Have the robots.
[00:28:25]  Yeah.
[00:28:26]  Rosie.
[00:28:26]  Oh, that's a bitch robot, though.
[00:28:28]  You got to have a male robot to drive.
[00:28:29]  Yeah, that's true.
[00:28:30]  Nah, who would I be if it was one woman?
[00:28:32]  That's a great question.
[00:28:33]  I don't know.
[00:28:34]  I don't know.
[00:28:34]  I know.
[00:28:35]  Who would you be?
[00:28:36]  Fuck.
[00:28:37]  Beyonce a good one.
[00:28:40]  You want Jay-Z's fucking man boobs all over you every single night?
[00:28:45]  Absolutely.
[00:28:48]  Taking off his little tank top.
[00:28:49]  Them titties come flying.
[00:28:50]  Yeah, that was the only reason I hesitated at Beyoncé.
[00:28:52]  Because you got to think about who that person's fucking because you got to fuck them now.
[00:28:56]  Yeah.
[00:28:56]  So that's a very important part of the decision.
[00:29:00]  So, Al, who is it?
[00:29:03]  Jessica Beale.
[00:29:05]  Oh, there you go.
[00:29:06]  Bibi-Bim.
[00:29:09]  Justin Timberlake, bro.
[00:29:11]  Seated up and everything.
[00:29:12]  Damn, respect.

=== Swimming Lessons For Adopted Kids (15:18) ===

[00:29:13]  Okay, okay, okay.
[00:29:15]  But that's who you would be as a woman?
[00:29:16]  Isn't she the one that's like close to a billionaire?
[00:29:18]  Nah, nah, nah, nah.
[00:29:19]  That's Jessica Alba.
[00:29:20]  Jessica Alba.
[00:29:22]  She's still hot.
[00:29:22]  It's crazy.
[00:29:23]  It doesn't even make sense.
[00:29:24]  Total smoke.
[00:29:25]  That even makes sense.
[00:29:26]  Total smoke.
[00:29:27]  Damn near billionaire that hot.
[00:29:29]  Two movies.
[00:29:30]  But tea, she made money in tea.
[00:29:32]  Another white person is stealing y'all shit.
[00:29:35]  You know, making that bread.
[00:29:36]  When are Indians going to put out some fucking tea, dog?
[00:29:38]  Hey, we got it.
[00:29:39]  Just don't already buy it.
[00:29:40]  I thought it was like skincare.
[00:29:41]  Mark Mucketty.
[00:29:42]  It might have been that.
[00:29:42]  What's the Jessica Alba's stuff?
[00:29:44]  Isn't it honest tea or honest company?
[00:29:46]  It's like baby products.
[00:29:47]  It's just like organic.
[00:29:49]  Yeah, it's baby shit.
[00:29:51]  Baby shit.
[00:29:51]  She had a baby.
[00:29:52]  But also like soaps and all the other things.
[00:29:55]  All right.
[00:29:55]  All right.
[00:29:56]  Mark, woman.
[00:29:56]  I'd be my girl.
[00:29:58]  You'd be your girl.
[00:29:59]  Yeah, bro.
[00:30:01]  You know what I mean?
[00:30:02]  Yeah.
[00:30:02]  That shit's fired.
[00:30:04]  What's wrong with that?
[00:30:05]  Is that cop out?
[00:30:07]  I live in my own house.
[00:30:09]  Miles got this one.
[00:30:10]  The Pink Rangers.
[00:30:14]  Kimberly is a better view.
[00:30:17]  I don't know who Scooby-Doo.
[00:30:19]  She knows all the facts.
[00:30:22]  Now, who would you be?
[00:30:23]  Sandra Bullock.
[00:30:24]  Sandra Bullock.
[00:30:26]  Oh, shit.
[00:30:27]  That's a good one.
[00:30:27]  That is a great one.
[00:30:28]  Why is that cool?
[00:30:29]  You can have a black son in the blind side.
[00:30:31]  Yeah.
[00:30:32]  And a real black son.
[00:30:33]  Yeah.
[00:30:33]  Nice.
[00:30:34]  She got a real black kid?
[00:30:35]  Yeah.
[00:30:35]  Yeah.
[00:30:35]  Wait, does she?
[00:30:36]  Yeah.
[00:30:36]  She adopted some fucking kid, Cameroonian or something.
[00:30:39]  Can you say the N-word if you adopt a black kid?
[00:30:42]  That's probably why they do it.
[00:30:43]  Not to them.
[00:30:44]  I think that's kind of rude.
[00:30:45]  It depends if you name them that, then maybe you'd have to, right?
[00:30:50]  Yeah.
[00:30:51]  Can they say it?
[00:30:55]  Interesting.
[00:30:56]  I mean, yeah, because it's their experience.
[00:30:59]  What if you're a white kid adopted by a black family?
[00:31:01]  Then what?
[00:31:01]  Oh, shit.
[00:31:02]  Ooh, that's a good question.
[00:31:03]  Them parents should be locked up, yo.
[00:31:05]  Wait, why?
[00:31:06]  What the fuck is that about?
[00:31:07]  Yo, if you're a white kid and you got black parents, do you think you call them the N-word when you're upset?
[00:31:14]  Like they ground you and you're like, these.
[00:31:17]  You think that that happens or no?
[00:31:19]  Because they probably grew up hearing it all the time.
[00:31:21]  It not is a hateful thing.
[00:31:22]  Yeah.
[00:31:23]  But out of frustration, they probably hear it all the time.
[00:31:27]  Yeah.
[00:31:27]  It's weird if they're like, yo, your brother can say it, but you can't.
[00:31:30]  Yeah.
[00:31:30]  The whole family potentially saying it, but you.
[00:31:33]  Yeah.
[00:31:34]  Calling you it.
[00:31:35]  Yep.
[00:31:36]  Whoa.
[00:31:37]  That's going to slip.
[00:31:38]  Yeah, it might.
[00:31:39]  Yeah.
[00:31:40]  And then if you say it out in public, you got to explain, like, nah, my parents are black.
[00:31:43]  Son, you wouldn't look at people, funny, black couple that adopted a white kid.
[00:31:46]  You'd be like, oh, fucking.
[00:31:47]  No, black kids you could adopt?
[00:31:49]  Like, Really?
[00:31:54]  Nah, it's like, why does it always just go one way?
[00:31:56]  Yeah.
[00:31:58]  White kids need to get adopted too.
[00:31:59]  Where?
[00:32:01]  What do you mean?
[00:32:01]  What's wrong with that?
[00:32:02]  Because we're the only people who adopt.
[00:32:04]  Everybody else makes.
[00:32:05]  If I adopt, I'm important, dog.
[00:32:06]  That means my family's doing well enough where they can adopt.
[00:32:09]  Yeah, but you got to understand, like, white people, like, we enjoy saving the world.
[00:32:15]  Yeah.
[00:32:15]  It's their thing.
[00:32:16]  You know what I mean?
[00:32:16]  Yeah.
[00:32:17]  But we also enjoy flexing.
[00:32:18]  Like, the same way that y'all like foreign whips, we like foreign kids.
[00:32:21]  Yeah.
[00:32:22]  You know what I mean?
[00:32:23]  I got to be a foreign.
[00:32:24]  You know what I mean?
[00:32:25]  Like, you got the little Cambodian running around.
[00:32:27]  Like, that's.
[00:32:28]  Right?
[00:32:28]  Yeah.
[00:32:29]  But you also have like burnouts that like get hooked on opiates and shit like that.
[00:32:33]  And they have to just toss their babies in the garbage.
[00:32:35]  Ooh.
[00:32:36]  Good point.
[00:32:37]  There you go.
[00:32:37]  And then those are the white kids.
[00:32:39]  Yeah.
[00:32:39]  They get adopted too.
[00:32:41]  Yeah.
[00:32:42]  I'm going to adopt an Indian for sure.
[00:32:44]  You crazy from me.
[00:32:45]  Hell yeah, dog.
[00:32:46]  Ain't no Indian orphans here.
[00:32:48]  We kill them here.
[00:32:49]  Out there, different story.
[00:32:51]  Ain't no Indian orphan in America.
[00:32:52]  I promise you.
[00:32:54]  I'll bet $100,000 right now.
[00:32:56]  I'll take the beta.
[00:33:00]  I'll find one.
[00:33:01]  I'm a cold-blooded Indian fucking orphan in America.
[00:33:04]  Look that shit up in the orphan databases.
[00:33:06]  If it is, I'll adopt that one.
[00:33:07]  I would like to have an eBay for it.
[00:33:09]  There's got to be a single Indian kid.
[00:33:11]  No chance, Lance.
[00:33:12]  There's like some tragedy that happened to the family or something like that.
[00:33:16]  That's why we got uncles.
[00:33:19]  I remember one time you asked me if my parents ever hired a babysitter, and I was offended.
[00:33:22]  I was like, what the fuck do you think my grandparents were?
[00:33:25]  Yeah, that's true.
[00:33:25]  I never, my parents never hired a babysitter.
[00:33:27]  Yeah, but y'all had grandparents.
[00:33:28]  He didn't have grandparents.
[00:33:30]  I didn't realize that at the time.
[00:33:31]  I was like, how dare he insult my grandparents?
[00:33:34]  If you have kids young, you don't ever need a babysitter.
[00:33:36]  Nah, no.
[00:33:37]  But if you have kids old, it could be an issue.
[00:33:41]  No choice.
[00:33:41]  Bro, I can't find one Indian orphan.
[00:33:44]  I told you, bro.
[00:33:45]  Son, we're not doing that shit here.
[00:33:47]  Now, in India, it's a problem.
[00:33:49]  So I'll get, you know, I'll get to it.
[00:33:51]  Did you get a Punjabi orphan?
[00:33:52]  Yeah, that's a good question, bro.
[00:33:53]  I might get a little dark-ass kid, you know?
[00:33:55]  Oh, really?
[00:33:56]  Really?
[00:33:56]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:33:57]  That's my adopting a black person.
[00:33:59]  Best of both worlds, you know?
[00:34:01]  Jay-Z and R. Kelly right there.
[00:34:02]  Do you really think you'll adopt, though?
[00:34:04]  I would love to adopt, yeah.
[00:34:05]  Really?
[00:34:05]  Yeah.
[00:34:06]  That's fine.
[00:34:07]  At least one kid.
[00:34:08]  Now, do you think you're more to adopt because you already look at people who aren't directly related to you as family?
[00:34:17]  So it's not that I mean that seriously.
[00:34:19]  Like you call your like friends, your sisters or cousins.
[00:34:23]  Yeah.
[00:34:23]  My cousins are my sisters and brothers.
[00:34:25]  You know, like, I think, yeah, family is so much more like, there's no term for cousin as far as I knew growing up.
[00:34:30]  You would never say that's my cousin.
[00:34:31]  My dad would be like, that's your brother.
[00:34:33]  That's your sister.
[00:34:33]  Oh, really?
[00:34:34]  So it just, I think it's just easier to feel familial in that sense.
[00:34:36]  Oh, I didn't know that.
[00:34:38]  You guys are all my brothers.
[00:34:39]  You know what I mean?
[00:34:39]  I don't have a problem.
[00:34:40]  That's all like, it's very easy for me.
[00:34:42]  And I think also you just want like, I got a lot of help from people who weren't directly related to me, blood-related.
[00:34:47]  So I would like to pay that forward.
[00:34:49]  And you feel like a kinship to Indians.
[00:34:52]  Yes, of course.
[00:34:52]  I don't know what that is, that feeling.
[00:34:55]  You don't.
[00:34:55]  For real, your friends are cotton.
[00:34:56]  No, outside of our friendship.
[00:34:58]  No, meaning, like, I don't go, like, I want a Scottish kid.
[00:35:01]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:35:02]  Like, I want to adopt a Scottish guy.
[00:35:03]  I want a Scottish, I want an Irish kid.
[00:35:05]  I wasn't raised so much in the culture that I would feel kinship from with anybody else that existed within the culture.
[00:35:11]  Yeah.
[00:35:11]  And I could see how you'd want to help somebody else who was coming from that.
[00:35:14]  And you go to the, and probably white people go to these places, the rich ones, and they see like poverty, real poverty.
[00:35:18]  Like, I got to do something like that.
[00:35:19]  Like a different level.
[00:35:20]  And you're like, yeah, I want to help.
[00:35:21]  The kind of the opportunity I have is I can help people that are from where I'm from because they're still that exist there.
[00:35:27]  But if you were really kind, you would just give the family money so they could raise their own kids instead of stealing it.
[00:35:31]  Says stealing the children.
[00:35:32]  Well, listen, if that's a possibility, I'll do that too.
[00:35:34]  Yeah.
[00:35:34]  I don't think I won't.
[00:35:35]  Hey, you could do that shit right now.
[00:35:37]  Yo, low-key, that's fucked up a celebrity.
[00:35:39]  No, no, no.
[00:35:39]  I didn't realize that.
[00:35:41]  Buying the kids off of the family when they could just give the family the money.
[00:35:44]  They don't take them from the parents.
[00:35:46]  They don't show up to the hospital.
[00:35:48]  Nah, they go to the orphanage.
[00:35:49]  Nah.
[00:35:51]  They're not catching baby elephants here.
[00:35:53]  They catching baby elephants.
[00:35:54]  You think they're trying to get the whole family?
[00:35:56]  Nah, they go to the source.
[00:35:58]  That was the whole shit with Madonna.
[00:35:59]  Remember when Madonna bought the kid?
[00:36:00]  And then the mom had like buyer's remorse or seller's remorse?
[00:36:03]  What?
[00:36:04]  She won't kill him.
[00:36:04]  What about losing Isaiah?
[00:36:06]  A Halley Berry movie in the 90s?
[00:36:07]  Maybe it was Hallie.
[00:36:09]  Talking about Indian Giver?
[00:36:10]  But real talk, they do that sometimes.
[00:36:12]  They buy it direct.
[00:36:13]  No middleman, nothing.
[00:36:15]  Show up.
[00:36:15]  Send him.
[00:36:16]  She wants to.
[00:36:17]  You want that organic.
[00:36:18]  I'm being dead serious.
[00:36:19]  I think that's happened before.
[00:36:22]  I assume that's all aftermarket.
[00:36:23]  I don't think it's retail kids.
[00:36:25]  I think you could get them retail.
[00:36:26]  No, wholesale.
[00:36:27]  Yeah, really.
[00:36:28]  Yeah, you could get kids wholesale.
[00:36:29]  You go up, see which one has the biggest belly.
[00:36:31]  You're like, all right, you need some food.
[00:36:32]  And then you buy that.
[00:36:32]  You get a break from the source.
[00:36:33]  That is more organic.
[00:36:34]  Yeah, I don't know.
[00:36:35]  100%.
[00:36:36]  That would feel weird to me, buying a kid from the parents.
[00:36:38]  It should.
[00:36:39]  Especially when you're multi-millionaire.
[00:36:40]  You give them $20,000.
[00:36:42]  They could live forever.
[00:36:43]  Well, there's also problems where the kid isn't actually taken from the family, but taken from the family, put in an adoption center, and then they adopt.
[00:36:51]  And then the family reaches out and goes, yo, that was, we just thought the kid was going to school or something.
[00:36:56]  See?
[00:36:57]  We lost the kid.
[00:36:58]  Yes.
[00:36:58]  So they're stealing kids and then selling them to Americans.
[00:37:01]  Ah, that's happened before.
[00:37:03]  There's historical precedent for that.
[00:37:05]  Is that?
[00:37:05]  Yeah, he is.
[00:37:06]  What happened?
[00:37:08]  Didn't go so well.
[00:37:09]  Yeah, tell me.
[00:37:10]  I'm missing it.
[00:37:11]  Slavery.
[00:37:12]  Fuck.
[00:37:13]  Come on, bro.
[00:37:14]  I didn't know that they did it like that.
[00:37:17]  I thought they stole the parents, too.
[00:37:19]  Yeah, they did, but I'm just saying, I mean, there's precedents.
[00:37:21]  Yeah, you can't just trust these white folks when they pull up.
[00:37:24]  No, never, bro.
[00:37:25]  They stole the family.
[00:37:26]  They just broke them up here.
[00:37:28]  Yeah, I think we kept them as a whole.
[00:37:30]  But at least you got to return, you know, we got to take it on.
[00:37:35]  That's why black people don't like cruises to this day.
[00:37:37]  I thought I was doing it.
[00:37:38]  I'm doing my best.
[00:37:39]  Yeah, but at least you know you're coming back.
[00:37:42]  You think you don't need to do that?
[00:37:43]  You're just doing some of these COVID cruises.
[00:37:45]  You never know.
[00:37:46]  You would think black people would have learned how to swim.
[00:37:49]  No, why?
[00:37:50]  We don't want to swim.
[00:37:51]  You might have to jump off a boat and get the fuck home at some point.
[00:37:53]  Yeah.
[00:37:54]  We're not getting on boats.
[00:37:55]  That is a good point.
[00:37:55]  Is that why we think you can't swim?
[00:37:57]  Because you didn't attempt it.
[00:37:59]  Is that where it comes from?
[00:38:00]  I'm being dead serious.
[00:38:01]  Why do we think, like, black people, you have this stereotype for being so athletic, but then there's also a stereotype for not being able to swim?
[00:38:08]  Because we don't grow up close to the beaches and waterfront properties.
[00:38:11]  Oh, yeah.
[00:38:12]  There's not any black people in Long Beach.
[00:38:14]  They also wonder.
[00:38:15]  Miami.
[00:38:16]  Yeah, that's the thing.
[00:38:16]  It's not really that much of a stereotype in the South, I don't think.
[00:38:18]  Yeah, black people can swim in the South.
[00:38:20]  Yeah.
[00:38:20]  I think it's just a northern thing.
[00:38:22]  I don't know if they can.
[00:38:23]  I don't know if any of my roommates in college could swim.
[00:38:25]  Well, I don't know if they can.
[00:38:26]  Actually, one of my black friends can't.
[00:38:27]  We tried to swim.
[00:38:29]  You tried it?
[00:38:30]  Yeah.
[00:38:30]  Would you try to?
[00:38:32]  He was like, Yeah, I don't know how to swim.
[00:38:32]  I was like, bro, we're going to teach you how to swim.
[00:38:34]  Let's be clear when he says he came to the top.
[00:38:36]  When he says one of my black friends, he means my one black friend.
[00:38:40]  Oh, I always hear about this one black friend.
[00:38:42]  I still wonder if he exists.
[00:38:43]  And then I met him in person.
[00:38:44]  He goes to a different school, bro.
[00:38:45]  You never met him.
[00:38:46]  Yeah, that's what it is.
[00:38:46]  Okay, so what happened?
[00:38:47]  How'd you guys ask him?
[00:38:49]  How'd you bring it up?
[00:38:49]  He was just like, I never learned how to swim.
[00:38:51]  Okay.
[00:38:51]  And first, he's Haitian, so I'm like, how did a Haitian not know how to swim?
[00:38:54]  Like, he grew up on an island.
[00:38:55]  Yeah.
[00:38:55]  I mean, he's didn't grow up in Haiti.
[00:38:57]  But I'm like, yeah, yeah, your parents knew how to swim.
[00:38:59]  And he'd never learned how.
[00:39:00]  Okay.
[00:39:01]  He's like, all right, you're going to come to my house.
[00:39:02]  We're going to teach you how to swim.
[00:39:03]  Let's do it.
[00:39:03]  Yeah.
[00:39:04]  And then he never came over.
[00:39:07]  He was like, yeah, I'm good.
[00:39:08]  Yeah, he was trying to steal.
[00:39:10]  He still doesn't know to this day.
[00:39:12]  Really?
[00:39:12]  Yeah, I think he thought I was a ploy.
[00:39:13]  My homie would go to pool parties with the floaties.
[00:39:16]  That's funny.
[00:39:17]  I was a 25-year-old man.
[00:39:18]  That jet, that's great.
[00:39:19]  That's fucking brilliant.
[00:39:20]  Yeah.
[00:39:21]  Whoa.
[00:39:22]  Al, you can swim.
[00:39:23]  Yeah, I can swim.
[00:39:24]  Yeah.
[00:39:24]  Like, you're good at it?
[00:39:25]  Yeah.
[00:39:26]  Because sometimes when black people learn how to swim for the first time, they do the crawl stroke, but they never come up for air.
[00:39:30]  So they just like pat, they have that's what I do.
[00:39:34]  They just go like this, and then they stop and then breathe.
[00:39:36]  I stand here, right?
[00:39:38]  And then I get back in it.
[00:39:39]  It's so funny.
[00:39:40]  My sister swims holding her nose.
[00:39:43]  It's hilarious.
[00:39:45]  She's going circles.
[00:39:46]  It's hilarious.
[00:39:48]  So what the fuck is it?
[00:39:49]  Is it cultural expectation?
[00:39:51]  Like, I feel like white people, I don't know.
[00:39:54]  I feel like white people have to know how to swim.
[00:39:56]  It is expected of us.
[00:39:58]  Poor, rich, you must know how to swim.
[00:40:00]  Well, a parent's also thinking, like, you have kids, the safest thing that you could do to protect them because they're going to be going to pool parties, they're about to be going to the beach, swimming lessons early.
[00:40:09]  And the first lessons, like, have you ever seen they throw like a baby into the pool and they learn how to turn over and go up?
[00:40:17]  My boy's kids can do that.
[00:40:18]  I saw him do it with his kid.
[00:40:19]  Yeah, newborn ass kid picked it up with by one arm, dropped it in the fucking pool in front of him.
[00:40:24]  Like a pea bag, bro.
[00:40:25]  Just dip this motherfucker in the pool and the kid and then rolls onto his back and then slowly swims on his back to the end of the pool.
[00:40:32]  So you gotta do it early.
[00:40:34]  You gotta do it early.
[00:40:34]  It's like a one-year-old kid can't even talk, right?
[00:40:36]  Bobby's kid.
[00:40:37]  Yeah, wow.
[00:40:38]  Oh, Bobby would Hawaiian ass.
[00:40:40]  He would Hawaiian ass.
[00:40:41]  100%.
[00:40:42]  That should have pissed me off.
[00:40:42]  I don't know how to swim and I see babies swimming.
[00:40:44]  I'd be like, I gotta learn this shit.
[00:40:46]  I'd be offended if white babies are swimming and I'm like a 30-year-old guy don't know how to swim.
[00:40:50]  Yeah, that would drive me crazy.
[00:40:52]  Yeah.
[00:40:54]  Why do you know?
[00:40:54]  Because you're Puerto Rican.
[00:40:56]  Nah, we would just take family vacays at the hotel.
[00:40:59]  But I drowned my first time trying.
[00:41:01]  And then I had to learn after that.
[00:41:03]  Really?
[00:41:03]  So I was there with my cousins and we were playing a game like run from the deep end and try to make it into the shorter part.
[00:41:09]  And I just didn't jump as far.
[00:41:10]  So I landed in like the five-foot area and I was like maybe like four foot at the top.
[00:41:14]  Whoa.
[00:41:14]  And I was just dying.
[00:41:16]  And my cousins were laughing at me.
[00:41:17]  Some white lady who was just tanning jumped in to save me.
[00:41:20]  Really?
[00:41:21]  Yeah.
[00:41:22]  That's fucked up, bro.
[00:41:24]  I don't think they realized that I was like drowning, drowning.
[00:41:26]  They thought I was just like fucking around.
[00:41:27]  Yeah.
[00:41:28]  I don't know.
[00:41:29]  Maybe they just tried to let me go.
[00:41:30]  That was going to be my near-death experience.
[00:41:32]  Oh, really?
[00:41:32]  I was like three, though.
[00:41:33]  I didn't know shit.
[00:41:33]  I was just on the step, and then I didn't know the step ended, and I was walking, and then it fell.
[00:41:37]  And I was just looking at the water, mad clear.
[00:41:39]  And then an uncle was supposed to be watching me, didn't have any fucking clue.
[00:41:43]  My brother's on the other end, and his friend was like, Yo, where'd your little brother go?
[00:41:46]  And my brother couldn't even swim.
[00:41:47]  So his friend had to swim all the way over.
[00:41:49]  And then that was the only way I lived.
[00:41:51]  Yeah, doesn't that suck being saved when your family's right there, but sent by a stranger?
[00:41:55]  That's why you can't trust your fake uncle, bro.
[00:41:57]  That's what it is.
[00:41:57]  If it was a real uncle, he would have said that.
[00:41:58]  Real uncle, you're right.
[00:41:59]  Hey, hey, you know what I'm saying?
[00:42:00]  Right, bro.
[00:42:01]  Fake uncles.
[00:42:02]  Yo, you white about that.
[00:42:04]  I'm calling everyone uncle.
[00:42:05]  Of course, you're going to drown, bro.
[00:42:06]  It's too much.
[00:42:07]  It's too trusty.
[00:42:08]  Yeah.
[00:42:08]  I'm fucked up.
[00:42:09]  That's on you.
[00:42:10]  Yeah, that's true.
[00:42:11]  What's your near-death experience?
[00:42:13]  Downing was white.
[00:42:13]  I was drowned seven times.
[00:42:14]  Bro, it was crazy, dude.
[00:42:16]  I was on my honeymoon, and this fucking cliff just separated.
[00:42:21]  It's separated from the rest of the cliff in Brazil.
[00:42:25]  And yeah, it was nuts.
[00:42:26]  I just made it out of there.
[00:42:27]  Yeah.
[00:42:28]  Yeah.
[00:42:28]  You ever thank COVID for not sending you to Brazil?
[00:42:31]  Bro, that is, this is one of the craziest things I've ever seen.
[00:42:33]  This is insane.
[00:42:34]  Yeah.
[00:42:35]  Yeah.
[00:42:35]  Just as a warrior, we'll play the video, but people die.
[00:42:38]  People definitely die.
[00:42:38]  Yeah.
[00:42:39]  I can't believe how many people were okay to just share this.
[00:42:41]  I'm like, that's tough.
[00:42:42]  You know why?
[00:42:43]  I didn't know people died when I was.
[00:42:44]  Oh, yeah, you shared it.
[00:42:45]  Did you assume they lived?
[00:42:46]  I didn't look at it that closely.
[00:42:48]  You thought they caught the wave?
[00:42:49]  He's such a cop-out dog.
[00:42:50]  I didn't look at it that closely.
[00:42:51]  If you watch it frame by frame, some people catch the wave.
[00:42:53]  Yeah.
[00:42:54]  It's wild.
[00:42:55]  Catch the wave?
[00:42:56]  Yeah.
[00:42:56]  Like bodies.
[00:42:58]  Flying at all.
[00:43:00]  That's catching a wave.
[00:43:03]  I don't think that's catching away.
[00:43:04]  I think that's dying.
[00:43:06]  I think they get thrown by the water.
[00:43:08]  That's drowning.
[00:43:09]  I think the reason why this was okay to scare is because it doesn't look real.
[00:43:16]  It looks like it's green screen.
[00:43:18]  It's like a movie.
[00:43:18]  It is a movie.
[00:43:19]  It's like, I don't even think our brains understood what was happening.
[00:43:23]  Have you ever seen a cliff just fall off?
[00:43:24]  I've seen avalanches.
[00:43:26]  I haven't seen a rock separate itself.
[00:43:28]  Never.
[00:43:29]  Like, it's unreal.
[00:43:29]  I didn't know it was possible.
[00:43:30]  Yeah.
[00:43:31]  You've seen glaciers.
[00:43:32]  You know how people like watch those things break off.
[00:43:34]  They cause the waves and blah, blah, blah.
[00:43:36]  But that makes sense because ice melts.
[00:43:38]  You think, okay, that could happen with a glacier.
[00:43:40]  You don't think a rock melts.
[00:43:42]  You know what I mean?
[00:43:43]  Yeah.
[00:43:43]  It was just so weird.
[00:43:45]  Was there an earthquake or something?
[00:43:47]  Like, have they found the cause of it?
[00:43:48]  So I think it was there was like a lot of rain or something that they thought kind of loosened things up.
[00:43:52]  And then if there's like a one-minute video where apparently they're speaking in Spanish and Portuguese, I don't know, but people are warning.
[00:43:58]  The guys that are filming are warning everybody, like, go, get out of there, get out of there, get out of there for like a minute before.
[00:44:03]  And nobody really seems to move.
[00:44:05]  And then you see it kind of move a little bit, and then people start trying to get out of the way, but it's too late.
[00:44:09]  We go watch real quick.
[00:44:10]  Oh, my God.
[00:44:11]  Holy fuck.
[00:44:13]  Look at this one boat.
[00:44:14]  This one boat.
[00:44:15]  Jesus Christ.
[00:44:17]  Son, that one boat right there, the red boat, sees it's happening.
[00:44:20]  He floors it.
[00:44:21]  He probably saved every motherfucker.
[00:44:23]  I don't know if anybody died that was on that boat, but they would literally all be dead.
[00:44:26]  That white boat behind him.
[00:44:28]  That white boat right there that's just stalled out.
[00:44:30]  They're dead.
[00:44:30]  Everybody on that boat is dead.

=== Realizing Universal Health Care Needs (17:51) ===

[00:44:31]  Guaranteed.
[00:44:32]  Yeah, insane.
[00:44:34]  Insane.
[00:44:34]  And some people jumped off.
[00:44:35]  I wonder if jumping off the boat would help you.
[00:44:37]  I was trying to think of how I would survive it.
[00:44:39]  Yeah, I would have jumped off.
[00:44:40]  If you're not right, if you're right under, I'm assuming that's just a rap.
[00:44:43]  But if you're like a little to the side, do you jump off?
[00:44:46]  I mean, because the rock is going to sink.
[00:44:47]  It's so dense.
[00:44:48]  So it'll be.
[00:44:49]  You got to jump off and you got to dive as deep as you possibly can.
[00:44:52]  Yeah.
[00:44:52]  Yeah.
[00:44:52]  Dive as deep because the rock is going to hit the water and it's going to be stopped.
[00:44:56]  Like, you know how you can shoot a bullet into like not a cup of water, but there's a certain amount of water and just the water itself will stop it.
[00:45:03]  Yeah.
[00:45:03]  They do these experiments.
[00:45:04]  I don't know how deep, maybe a bucket or something like that.
[00:45:06]  But a bullet won't go no matter how fast the boat's going.
[00:45:08]  The water is really dense.
[00:45:09]  Yeah, super dense.
[00:45:10]  So it's going to stop the rock to a certain extent or at least stop it from going so fast that it's just going to kill you on impact.
[00:45:15]  Right.
[00:45:16]  So I'm like diving and then I'm swimming.
[00:45:18]  If I know it's falling right on me, I'm diving.
[00:45:20]  I'm swimming down as fast as I fucking can.
[00:45:21]  Yeah.
[00:45:22]  Not hoping.
[00:45:23]  The boulder, you're going to have to go 20, 30 feet.
[00:45:26]  You can't do it that way.
[00:45:27]  And I assume a boulder would just sink to the bottom.
[00:45:29]  So it's possible that shit just drowns you at the bottom.
[00:45:32]  And then you got to try to come out of it.
[00:45:34]  It could suck you in.
[00:45:35]  Could it create like a pressure zone?
[00:45:36]  100%.
[00:45:36]  It's like Titanic.
[00:45:37]  Oh, yeah.
[00:45:38]  Remember when they jump off the boat and they're like, yo, the second we jump off, just start swimming.
[00:45:42]  Because when the boat sinks, it's going to take you down with it.
[00:45:45]  Yeah.
[00:45:46]  Yeah.
[00:45:46]  Like there are people who probably survived the impact and then were sucked down with it.
[00:45:51]  Yeah, it's insane.
[00:45:52]  Yeah.
[00:45:52]  Foul.
[00:45:52]  Crazy.
[00:45:54]  So like what happens?
[00:45:55]  Is this type of tourism done?
[00:45:57]  Well, the crazy thing is I feel like stuff like this happens often.
[00:46:00]  Maybe not often, but like frequently, just like around the world.
[00:46:02]  Like rock formations are just like sliding, falling.
[00:46:04]  There's just never people there.
[00:46:06]  You know what I mean?
[00:46:07]  Yeah.
[00:46:07]  So like this might happen all the time.
[00:46:09]  We just don't really know.
[00:46:10]  Yeah, because the cliff got that way somehow.
[00:46:14]  Yeah.
[00:46:14]  Yeah, but the way that they explain it to us is that it's like erosion over millions of years.
[00:46:18]  Yeah.
[00:46:18]  Like you ever see these models?
[00:46:20]  Never in the model do you see just a section of the cliff fall off one year, right?
[00:46:25]  They make it seem like, oh, wind was blowing against it and there was some sand and it slowly carved into this shape.
[00:46:30]  Nah, fam.
[00:46:31]  Yeah.
[00:46:32]  That thing fell apart in chunks, probably.
[00:46:34]  Yeah.
[00:46:35]  Ugh.
[00:46:37]  Yeah, they said there was extremely heavy rain in the area and a dike overflowed at an iron ore mine.
[00:46:43]  Whoa, dude.
[00:46:43]  He just went.
[00:46:44]  Come on.
[00:46:45]  Whoa, dude.
[00:46:46]  You really wanted to say that.
[00:46:47]  You just want to see a dike cause this.
[00:46:49]  Really?
[00:46:50]  So a dike was just standing on the end of it.
[00:46:52]  This is what happened.
[00:46:53]  Cause by a dyke's heavy flow, huh?
[00:46:54]  Yeah.
[00:46:55]  Unbelievable.
[00:46:56]  That's crazy.
[00:46:57]  Them Brazilian dykes don't play around, bro.
[00:46:59]  I guess not, dude.
[00:47:00]  Yeah, they are not playing around.
[00:47:02]  What do you think was happening?
[00:47:03]  You think she was doing like a little TikTok video at the end of it?
[00:47:06]  And she was doing her little dance and then just that weight, that pressure, bro.
[00:47:10]  Them comorbidities.
[00:47:12]  Them comorbidities cause that rock to fall.
[00:47:15]  Okay, how many of these deaths are due to COVID?
[00:47:18]  I think six.
[00:47:19]  Six, right?
[00:47:20]  Have they confirmed?
[00:47:20]  Did the CDZ confirm that most of the deaths were actually due to COVID?
[00:47:24]  Yeah.
[00:47:24]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:47:24]  Okay, good.
[00:47:25]  Do you see them walking back all these numbers right now?
[00:47:27]  What do you mean?
[00:47:28]  They're like saying, like, of all the deaths, they said 75% of them, the people had four or more comorbidities.
[00:47:36]  So they can't even confirm that the deaths were from COVID.
[00:47:41]  Yeah, but I guess the comorbidity is still COVID was the thing that put it over the top.
[00:47:46]  They had four more things that were causing them to die, and they just also had COVID at the same time.
[00:47:51]  Yeah, but isn't that kind of like AIDS doesn't kill you?
[00:47:54]  It's the thing that you get after AIDS destroys your immune system that kills you.
[00:47:57]  I'm telling motherfuckers AIDS killed me.
[00:47:58]  I'm not going to die of no fucking cough.
[00:48:00]  Yeah.
[00:48:01]  But the fact is, the cough got you.
[00:48:03]  Nah, not.
[00:48:06]  That's the science.
[00:48:07]  Nah.
[00:48:07]  I mean, nah.
[00:48:08]  Trust the science.
[00:48:09]  Nah.
[00:48:12]  I can't say nah.
[00:48:13]  If you don't know that.
[00:48:13]  Imagine that, bro.
[00:48:15]  Ugh.
[00:48:15]  I know.
[00:48:16]  A little wheeze kills you.
[00:48:18]  Yeah.
[00:48:18]  Crazy.
[00:48:19]  Tickle in the back of your throat.
[00:48:20]  You're dead.
[00:48:21]  Yeah.
[00:48:21]  All right, guys.
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[00:49:53]  Now, let's get back to the show.
[00:49:54]  So, in the beginning, they were just every time COVID was in the system, they attributed it to COVID.
[00:50:02]  And so now they're just saying, like, oh, if they had other things, we were not certain whether or not it was the COVID that did it.
[00:50:08]  I mean, I'd rather them say that instead of in the beginning, they just said every single death was COVID.
[00:50:13]  I feel bad for them, man, because they're trying to figure it out on the fly.
[00:50:16]  One, they're trying to figure out on the fly, and then two, they also have to manage like human behavior, right?
[00:50:22]  And in order to get us to do things, you have to exaggerate, right?
[00:50:25]  Like, we're not going to recycle unless you tell us the world is ending in 25 years.
[00:50:29]  Yeah.
[00:50:29]  Right?
[00:50:30]  Like, that's the only way you can motivate human beings to change our behavior.
[00:50:33]  Right.
[00:50:33]  It has to be imminent doom.
[00:50:35]  Yeah.
[00:50:35]  Hey, bro, we got to look out for climate change.
[00:50:38]  Why?
[00:50:38]  We're dead in 50 years.
[00:50:39]  Right.
[00:50:40]  Hey, we need electric cars.
[00:50:41]  Why?
[00:50:41]  We're out of oil in 10 years.
[00:50:43]  Right.
[00:50:43]  Right?
[00:50:43]  Like, we just need these extreme measures to get us to change our behavior because you know how easy it is for us to get stuck in our ways.
[00:50:49]  Yep.
[00:50:49]  We get one pair of jeans we like, we just wear them jeans.
[00:50:51]  Right.
[00:50:52]  Right?
[00:50:52]  It's hard to get us to change, right?
[00:50:54]  Yeah.
[00:50:55]  So it's like, I almost feel bad for them a little bit because they knew, especially with the vaccine shit, they knew that it wasn't going to be, I don't know if they knew, but I'm sure that they assumed that this wasn't going to be like a forever type of situation.
[00:51:08]  Right.
[00:51:08]  But they couldn't come just say, hey, this will just kind of help you fight it.
[00:51:11]  Yeah.
[00:51:11]  Because most of us would be like, well, I've seen people get it.
[00:51:14]  They didn't die.
[00:51:15]  Yeah.
[00:51:15]  I'll give this to my folks.
[00:51:16]  I ain't going to do it.
[00:51:17]  Yeah.
[00:51:17]  Right.
[00:51:18]  But they want us to get just back to business.
[00:51:19]  How do we get back to business?
[00:51:20]  Once they got a pill once Pfizer comes out with that pill that treats COVID, I don't plan on getting another booster.
[00:51:24]  Right.
[00:51:24]  Because you have a treatment.
[00:51:25]  Yeah.
[00:51:25]  Why do that?
[00:51:26]  There's a there's a pill.
[00:51:27]  There's a pill that wait is it prevents it?
[00:51:28]  Is it like that HIV?
[00:51:30]  Treats it if you get it.
[00:51:30]  Treats if you get it.
[00:51:31]  Exactly.
[00:51:31]  So the treatment, boom.
[00:51:32]  And low-key, that's what they want.
[00:51:34]  They want motherfuckers to keep getting COVID and then keep buying the pills.
[00:51:37]  Booster, they only get you once.
[00:51:39]  This, keep on getting Omicron, Fluoricron, Deltacron.
[00:51:43]  Whatever new COVID comes out, they have a pill for you.
[00:51:46]  You're good to go.
[00:51:46]  They make all their money and we get back to work easy.
[00:51:49]  That's, I think, the tricky thing is that sometimes everybody just taking off 10 days from work or five days, whatever it is, sometimes that's more deadly to the economy and that's more deadly to people than the virus itself.
[00:52:01]  And they can't just be honest and say that.
[00:52:03]  Like when they dropped it from 10 days to five days, like apparently that there were like a lot of people that were working in hospitals and shit.
[00:52:08]  They always had to do five-day symptoms.
[00:52:11]  Did you guys read that?
[00:52:12]  No.
[00:52:12]  I was reading that that like it was always a five-day period for those people.
[00:52:15]  Okay.
[00:52:15]  And maybe it was because they needed to get them back into work so they could treat people.
[00:52:19]  Now it's like they're letting in California healthcare workers work with COVID if they don't have symptoms.
[00:52:24]  Wow.
[00:52:26]  Interesting.
[00:52:26]  And it all goes to this.
[00:52:27]  It's like, yo, if everybody has to, if we have a COVID now that's so contagious that the vaccine doesn't stop it, right?
[00:52:36]  And you can get it just if you're next to somebody, around somebody, and immediately it latches on.
[00:52:41]  This is the Omicron shit.
[00:52:42]  And it's not killing people.
[00:52:44]  Yeah.
[00:52:44]  The big concern is: how do we have people actually function in a society when nobody could work?
[00:52:51]  Yeah.
[00:52:51]  Like if everybody gets it and everybody has to take 10 days off, hospital is going to close, airports are going to close, banks are going to close.
[00:53:00]  So then, of course, they got to start saying, all right, fine, it's just five days.
[00:53:03]  Yeah.
[00:53:04]  Right.
[00:53:05]  And of course, they could take the risk because even if you do get it, you're not going to die.
[00:53:08]  No.
[00:53:08]  Yeah.
[00:53:09]  That's why.
[00:53:09]  So that makes sense.
[00:53:10]  Because I was like, y'all caused all this panic.
[00:53:13]  And then your mad people are like, oh, Fluoron is going to kill us or Deltacron or whatever that's called.
[00:53:19]  That's not even.
[00:53:19]  It was apparently like a lab mix-up.
[00:53:21]  But yeah, you do kind of have to cause a panic to get people to listen at first.
[00:53:25]  Yeah.
[00:53:25]  So I think that's what I'm saying.
[00:53:25]  But then you paint yourself in a real fucking corner because now when this thing isn't that bad, we're all still treating it like OG Corona.
[00:53:31]  Yes.
[00:53:32]  That's killing mad people.
[00:53:33]  And you deserve the smoke.
[00:53:34]  Yeah.
[00:53:35]  You deserve the smoke because you rolled the dice on treating it like it was crazy.
[00:53:38]  Yeah.
[00:53:38]  Not knowing that this new version was going to come out.
[00:53:40]  Yeah.
[00:53:41]  And so you, I don't know if they knowingly lie, but you knowingly withheld shit.
[00:53:46]  Right.
[00:53:46]  And now you get the smoke for withholding it.
[00:53:48]  And that's your responsibility.
[00:53:49]  You got to be accountable for that.
[00:53:51]  So we're allowed to be angry.
[00:53:52]  But at the same time, I understand why they had to be so exaggerative.
[00:53:55]  Right.
[00:53:55]  Because we ain't going to listen unless they exactly.
[00:53:57]  We didn't listen to Corona.
[00:53:58]  Started in like December, January of 2019.
[00:54:01]  We're like, that's an Asian shit.
[00:54:02]  Nobody gave a fuck.
[00:54:03]  We got a couple cases here.
[00:54:05]  Then finally, everybody had to shut down in mid-March because finally we're like, okay, they're telling us this is crazy.
[00:54:10]  And if it wasn't for that, probably numbers would have been way higher.
[00:54:13]  Yeah.
[00:54:14]  It was funny.
[00:54:14]  I was talking to my boy, and he was telling me about what's happening in Canada because they just did another lockdown in Canada.
[00:54:21]  I'm like, why are they locking down?
[00:54:22]  I'm like, this doesn't make any sense to me.
[00:54:23]  Like, it's not killing people.
[00:54:25]  What's the big deal?
[00:54:26]  And he goes, he goes, so here's the deal.
[00:54:29]  In Canada, they have to protect universal health care at all costs.
[00:54:31]  Right.
[00:54:32]  Right.
[00:54:32]  And if this, so basically, what they're trying to do is shut down to stop the spread because the spread will increase people going to the hospital.
[00:54:40]  Even if it's not killing people, there will be people that freak out and they go to the hospital.
[00:54:43]  And they got to pay for that.
[00:54:44]  And they, meaning the government, got to pay for it.
[00:54:46]  The government, and I'm like, well, dude, what about private businesses?
[00:54:49]  He goes, that's not the government's business.
[00:54:51]  The government's worried about universal health care.
[00:54:54]  They're not worried about them private businesses.
[00:54:55]  And then Mark brought up a good point.
[00:54:57]  He goes, yeah, but how does the government get revenue?
[00:54:58]  The government gets revenue from them private businesses.
[00:55:01]  And there's another thing that they also get revenue from.
[00:55:05]  I forget exactly what he was saying, but it is interesting that like Corona is kind of showing the limitations of universal health care.
[00:55:11]  Like it's a dream when everybody's healthy.
[00:55:13]  But when you've got a global pandemic, which does happen, it's not like there's no precedence for this.
[00:55:18]  There's been global pandemics since the beginning of human history.
[00:55:23]  So it's like that is going to happen.
[00:55:24]  And it's going to stress that fucking universal health care.
[00:55:27]  And all of a sudden, they're going to have to be making decisions that impact your freedom so they could protect their institution.
[00:55:33]  And they will continue to do it in Australia.
[00:55:36]  They'll continue to do it in New Zealand.
[00:55:37]  They'll continue to do it in Canada.
[00:55:38]  I imagine Europe is probably similar because they have to.
[00:55:43]  They have no other choice.
[00:55:45]  They have to keep the cost down.
[00:55:46]  It's not even how do we keep people alive?
[00:55:48]  Like, how do we keep the costs for this system down?
[00:55:51]  Because if they stress the system and we get rid of university, we have to get rid of universal health care.
[00:55:55]  That's a giant black eye on our perception to the world.
[00:55:58]  Hell yeah.
[00:55:59]  We look weak.
[00:56:00]  We look like we poorly planned government, all of that.
[00:56:03]  So just shut that down.
[00:56:05]  Everybody will recover financially.
[00:56:06]  And if they don't, we'll take care of that down the road.
[00:56:08]  Kick that can down the road.
[00:56:09]  But in the meantime, lockdown.
[00:56:11]  I can't afford to pay this.
[00:56:12]  We can't afford to pay this as a government.
[00:56:14]  That shit is mad vulnerable too.
[00:56:15]  Like, imagine like you run a business and at any point in time, you hear about a new variant come out.
[00:56:22]  Yeah.
[00:56:22]  And literally, the day that you hear about the new variant, it could be in South Africa, it could be in Greece, whatever it is.
[00:56:29]  You're just waiting until your shit gets locked down again.
[00:56:31]  Yeah.
[00:56:32]  Every single day.
[00:56:33]  You can't plan two weeks out.
[00:56:34]  You can't plan your menu for next week.
[00:56:36]  You got your employees.
[00:56:37]  You got your staff.
[00:56:39]  Like, that is terrifying, bro.
[00:56:41]  And if it's like two cases, we're shutting down.
[00:56:43]  That's it.
[00:56:43]  The flip side, though, is if you get COVID, you don't got to pay 15 grand if you're in the hospital for the month or whatever.
[00:56:49]  Totally.
[00:56:50]  Yeah.
[00:56:50]  So Canadians might look at it as worth it.
[00:56:52]  I don't know.
[00:56:52]  And overall.
[00:56:53]  They might, but at the same time, like, how many people do we know that have had COVID and had to go to the hospital and pay 15 grand?
[00:57:00]  Yannis.
[00:57:02]  Say what?
[00:57:02]  Yannis.
[00:57:02]  Just Yannis.
[00:57:03]  And he might have got insurance.
[00:57:04]  Yeah.
[00:57:05]  You know?
[00:57:05]  Yeah.
[00:57:05]  So it's like costing you 15 grand.
[00:57:07]  I will say, overall, there's a global pandemic every couple of centuries, it seems like.
[00:57:12]  So overall, universal health care might be better.
[00:57:14]  But right now, it ain't.
[00:57:15]  It just sucks.
[00:57:17]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:57:17]  Fucking losers.
[00:57:18]  But they had Spanish flu.
[00:57:20]  Yeah, 1800s, I think.
[00:57:21]  Like 1918.
[00:57:22]  1918.
[00:57:23]  So like every hundred years.
[00:57:24]  But there was also, what's that, polio?
[00:57:26]  There's like local shit.
[00:57:27]  And like China will have, you know, a virus that pops out every couple of years.
[00:57:30]  Those from pandemic to endemic.
[00:57:33]  And what is the difference?
[00:57:34]  It's within your thing and then panic.
[00:57:37]  Look at me.
[00:57:38]  Why are you looking at me?
[00:57:38]  I don't know.
[00:57:39]  Mark usually knows shit like that.
[00:57:41]  But there's always going to be something that's going to put stress on the universal healthcare system.
[00:57:45]  Now, I'm not saying our shit is better.
[00:57:47]  Don't get me wrong.
[00:57:47]  I would love for us to have universal health.
[00:57:49]  It'd be great to not even worry about it.
[00:57:51]  We were having this discussion the other day about like how like the planning for your country is going to be dictated by your cultural desires.
[00:58:01]  Right.
[00:58:02]  And it's no surprise to me that like places like Spain and Greece have this robust social system that just allows the people from those places.
[00:58:12]  I think Italy's probably the same way to enjoy life in the way that they're accustomed to enjoy it.
[00:58:19]  Like motherfuckers just want to have a great meal, sit and watch the sunrise, have a nice espresso.
[00:58:24]  You know what I mean?
[00:58:25]  Like when I was there, it wasn't a bunch of people like us just going, how do I fucking, you know, how do I become the best in my industry and change the fucking game?
[00:58:33]  And what am I going to do?
[00:58:34]  It was more like, I'm going to go do my job and then enjoy the fuck out of the rest of my life.
[00:58:38]  Yes.
[00:58:39]  You know, like France every year is like, what about a 30-hour work week?
[00:58:42]  What about a 25-hour week?
[00:58:43]  And I get it because if you're maximizing the other hours of your week, and that's culturally what you're wrapped around, like girls out there giving pussy to dudes who ain't even making no money, but they just got swag.
[00:58:54]  They're cool.
[00:58:54]  Yeah.
[00:58:55]  Yeah.
[00:58:55]  You know, they're charming.
[00:58:56]  They read books.
[00:58:57]  If you take our ego out of it and desire to be great, that's a way better life.
[00:59:00]  And I think that eventually you get there.
[00:59:02]  I think that we're so young that the idea of being able to access money, like we're all the sons of immigrants, right?
[00:59:08]  So like the idea, like, whoa, I could change my fortune.
[00:59:10]  Yeah.
[00:59:11]  I don't have to exist in this forever.
[00:59:13]  Yeah.
[00:59:14]  Whoa.
[00:59:14]  Like that freedom thing that we keep talking about is so tantalizing.
[00:59:18]  But eventually I think we'll do the same thing that Europeans did, which is which is start to go, hey, you know what's really fun?
[00:59:24]  Hanging out with my family.
[00:59:25]  Yeah.
[00:59:26]  You know what I mean?
[00:59:26]  I spent 50 years, whatever, getting to this point, but now I'm 50.
[00:59:30]  Yeah, exactly.
[00:59:31]  I could have been doing this my whole life, just relaxing.
[00:59:33]  Not take August off.
[00:59:35]  We do that in Europe the whole month.
[00:59:37]  Son, every day, La Pausa or whatever they call it.
[00:59:39]  Italy, it's just like two to five, whatever the fuck the hours are.
[00:59:42]  Everything is done.
[00:59:43]  So that's like, yeah, that's like lower Italy, but it's what it is.
[00:59:46]  But they also know like we're trained the lower you get, the less capitalistic you get.
[00:59:51]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:59:51]  But you work hard and then you enjoy it when you're retired after 55, 65.
[00:59:56]  You're like, what do you want to do then?
[00:59:58]  Like, yeah, at least have that retirement every August going on.
[01:00:01]  Like when I worked with the Italians, like they were always, this is the difference that I saw.
[01:00:05]  Like Americans, it's like, okay, I like wine, right?
[01:00:07]  I can afford a $20 bottle.
[01:00:08]  Now I can afford a $50 bottle and now a $100 bottle.
[01:00:11]  And I'm like, they learn how to taste wine better so that that $30 bottle they'll enjoy forever.
[01:00:18]  And they're like, well, it's a fantastic bottle that you're enjoying.
[01:00:21]  You even know how to really enjoy it.
[01:00:23]  Yeah.
[01:00:24]  Like we're out here enjoying things that aren't even real.
[01:00:27]  Like we're discussing NFTs.
[01:00:30]  Yeah.
[01:00:30]  Do you think someone in the south of Greece and his friends, all 50 years old, are sitting and thinking about how they can make their new NFT?
[01:00:37]  Or do you think that they just made like a Saganaki cheese and they're so excited to like try it and sit and enjoy the fucking afternoon?
[01:00:44]  Now, I'm not saying that's all of them.
[01:00:46]  Obviously, they got capitalistic motherfuckers like that.
[01:00:48]  And I'm not saying one is better than the other, but I think it's a version of maturity.
[01:00:51]  And I think eventually we get to that in a thousand years or whatever.
[01:00:56]  And when we start realizing that the finer things in life are the people that you love and your family and maximizing the time with them.
[01:01:04]  I think it'll be less than a thousand years, but yeah.
[01:01:06]  You think maybe everything's expedited now?
[01:01:08]  Your kid, bro.
[01:01:09]  Maybe your kid.
[01:01:10]  You're not owning a bookstore, dude, and just like and make cheeses and shit.
[01:01:13]  Nah, no, no, no, maybe.
[01:01:15]  Making cheeses, maybe.
[01:01:16]  How long do you think it takes?
[01:01:18]  It depends on how wealthy you are, like how much wealth you're born into, I think.
[01:01:22]  Ah, yes, because you have access to realizing that wealth isn't the thing that makes you happy.
[01:01:27]  Yeah.
[01:01:28]  And that is an experience that most people in history just do not have.
[01:01:33]  Probably.
[01:01:33]  Like you need luxury to know that that isn't going to bring joy.
[01:01:37]  And that within that luxury, it's the time to spend with your family that brings the joy.
[01:01:42]  Right.
[01:01:42]  And then maybe after that, you start realizing, am I going to fight tooth and nail and fuck people over and try to ruin their businesses so I could make mine succeed?
[01:01:52]  Yeah.
[01:01:53]  When I know that the thing that makes me happiest is just having a cookout with the boys.
[01:01:58]  Just move back home, bro.
[01:01:59]  That's what Antonio Brown did.
[01:02:01]  He's like, you know what?
[01:02:02]  All this work and shit, it's not worth this.
[01:02:04]  Not for me.
[01:02:05]  Wait, before we get to AB, I want to ask you a question.
[01:02:07]  Yeah.
[01:02:08]  I had the wording.
[01:02:09]  I kind of lost it, but something like, do you want your kid, say you have a son, to be as hungry as you are?
[01:02:15]  And if so, how do you motivate him to be that hungry when life is going to be exponentially easier because of what you've set up?

=== Why Taxes Feel So Crazy (15:19) ===

[01:02:23]  I just want them to be passionate about something.
[01:02:25]  Oh, I love that.
[01:02:26]  It's a great answer.
[01:02:27]  Yeah.
[01:02:27]  And like, I don't care what it is that you're passionate about, but as long as you're passionate about it, you'll enjoy the time that you spend on it.
[01:02:35]  And if you're making 50 grand a year on it, that's awesome.
[01:02:38]  You're making $50 million a year.
[01:02:40]  That's awesome.
[01:02:41]  But like, I just see, I see the way that my wife just enjoys the blistered peppers thing that she's doing.
[01:02:51]  And like, she really enjoys it.
[01:02:53]  And it's like fun for her to like make these videos.
[01:02:55]  And it reminds me of like early when I started embarking on my career and like how there was never enough time for me to spend on it.
[01:03:02]  It wasn't a chore.
[01:03:03]  Yeah.
[01:03:04]  Like if there was 25 hours in a day, I would spend the extra hour doing it.
[01:03:08]  Right.
[01:03:08]  Right.
[01:03:08]  And like, so for me, I would just love my kid to be passionate as fuck about something.
[01:03:13]  It might not even be their job.
[01:03:14]  It might be the thing they do after their job.
[01:03:16]  Right.
[01:03:17]  Just knowing that they have that thing that's like this driving force in their life that everything in their life is pushing them towards.
[01:03:23]  Yeah.
[01:03:24]  Spending time doing that.
[01:03:25]  Like, okay, good.
[01:03:26]  You're good.
[01:03:26]  Yeah.
[01:03:26]  Be a teacher, even if you don't love teaching.
[01:03:28]  If it allows you to do this other thing, great.
[01:03:31]  Yeah.
[01:03:31]  Yeah.
[01:03:33]  And I think that it doesn't matter.
[01:03:34]  I think success at that point doesn't matter.
[01:03:36]  Yeah, because that's something I wonder about.
[01:03:37]  I don't want a kid who's like soft.
[01:03:39]  And I don't mean, I just mean like spoiled.
[01:03:41]  Reward their passions.
[01:03:42]  Yeah.
[01:03:42]  And that's, I think, what a lot of like rich parents do is that they push their kids into certain directions and they go, this is an acceptable way to make a living or this is an acceptable job to have.
[01:03:52]  Instead of just going, oh, you're passionate about that?
[01:03:54]  I'm going to reward that passion.
[01:03:55]  Yeah.
[01:03:56]  And I was fortunate enough.
[01:03:57]  My parents always did that.
[01:03:59]  Like, I wanted to open a bar once.
[01:04:02]  My parents were like, okay, we'll put our house up if you need a down payment.
[01:04:05]  And I was like, what?
[01:04:07]  Like, that is crazy.
[01:04:08]  What if your kid wants to do that?
[01:04:09]  What if he wants to open a gay bar?
[01:04:10]  No.
[01:04:12]  Gay bar, yes.
[01:04:12]  Yeah.
[01:04:13]  Those men are always full.
[01:04:14]  What if that's his passion?
[01:04:15]  What if he's like, yo, I just love just dudes and just gay bars?
[01:04:18]  Yeah, that's great.
[01:04:19]  Make it a great gay bar.
[01:04:20]  Just be the best.
[01:04:21]  Make it awesome.
[01:04:22]  Yeah.
[01:04:22]  Actually, you don't even have to be the best.
[01:04:23]  You just have to fucking love it.
[01:04:25]  Yeah.
[01:04:25]  Yeah, absolutely.
[01:04:26]  I think gay bar is great business.
[01:04:28]  Yeah.
[01:04:28]  Yeah.
[01:04:29]  Should we start?
[01:04:30]  Because they have to go there.
[01:04:31]  Why do we have to?
[01:04:33]  Right, because we don't let them go to the straight bars, right?
[01:04:35]  So they have to go there.
[01:04:37]  What do you mean we?
[01:04:38]  You specifically.
[01:04:39]  Oh, I don't know.
[01:04:40]  You're the bouncer, dude.
[01:04:41]  You need your vax card and your fax card.
[01:04:45]  No, for real.
[01:04:47]  Yeah, no, I think it's great business, dude.
[01:04:48]  Anytime you tap into like niche business like that, fuck you.
[01:04:50]  Yeah, you'll make a trans bar and shit.
[01:04:53]  In LA, the gay bars are the ones who have lasted as long as you're because they don't got to go home and take care of the kids at night.
[01:04:59]  Drink every night of the week.
[01:05:01]  Oh, they got the most money.
[01:05:02]  Dinks, dual income, no kids.
[01:05:04]  Gay couples.
[01:05:04]  That's like a big thing.
[01:05:06]  Hell yeah.
[01:05:06]  That's great business.
[01:05:08]  Gay.
[01:05:08]  I only want my kids doing gay shit.
[01:05:11]  You know what I mean?
[01:05:14]  Anytime you can have a place for a community to come be with their community, you're good.
[01:05:18]  You'll survive.
[01:05:19]  Yeah.
[01:05:19]  Let's do that.
[01:05:20]  That's always a furry bar.
[01:05:21]  You know, furry.
[01:05:22]  Like, you know, furries?
[01:05:23]  Yeah.
[01:05:24]  Yeah.
[01:05:25]  I'm on.
[01:05:26]  There's no bar for furries, I don't think.
[01:05:27]  Yeah.
[01:05:28]  You could do that.
[01:05:29]  I'd be passionate about that.
[01:05:30]  That's what I'm saying.
[01:05:31]  A dog bar, dude.
[01:05:32]  We just open it up.
[01:05:33]  You have to be dressed as a furry to come in.
[01:05:35]  I think that's cool.
[01:05:36]  Okay, let's talk about AB.
[01:05:38]  Yeah.
[01:05:38]  Okay.
[01:05:39]  Or is that what we want to talk about?
[01:05:40]  Should we start the podcast?
[01:05:41]  We're in.
[01:05:43]  Oh, just one thing from before.
[01:05:45]  I don't see America ever getting to that mature level of not caring about capitalism the way we do now because everyone around the world comes here for that.
[01:05:55]  Yeah.
[01:05:55]  So you're going to keep introducing that like driving culture here.
[01:06:00]  I agree with you.
[01:06:01]  That is we're rewarding it, is what you're saying.
[01:06:03]  Like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:06:04]  That is dependent upon us staying a superpower.
[01:06:08]  If we drop to number two, number three, and we're kind of cool with it, then a different.
[01:06:13]  What if the government is like, yo, we got to start a tax, we're going to have great social programs.
[01:06:16]  They'd be taxing, you know.
[01:06:19]  60% of your money goes to the business.
[01:06:20]  They'll be taxing, and everyone's taking care of.
[01:06:22]  There's like not really normals.
[01:06:23]  Do you really see the government doing that?
[01:06:24]  Oh, I'm so, yo.
[01:06:26]  I can't see that.
[01:06:26]  I'm so happy Andrew is paying all these taxes.
[01:06:29]  It makes me so happy.
[01:06:31]  You moved us back here, dog.
[01:06:32]  You moved us back here.
[01:06:33]  I punched Bernie Sanders in his face if I see him complain about motherfuckers not paying taxes.
[01:06:38]  Where's that same energy to those of us who do?
[01:06:41]  Yeah.
[01:06:41]  Why aren't they tweeting about us?
[01:06:43]  Why don't they go, look at this great example of an American paying all this goddamn fucking money in taxes every single year so I can have a job?
[01:06:50]  Right?
[01:06:50]  Talk about me, Bernie.
[01:06:52]  Talk about me, Pocahontas.
[01:06:53]  Yeah.
[01:06:53]  Bitch, you got to talk to your parents about this too.
[01:06:55]  I got you.
[01:06:56]  Because you always talk about your parents, like how they were so honest with their taxes and how that affects.
[01:06:59]  Who was they doing that for?
[01:07:00]  Not making your money.
[01:07:01]  You know what I'm saying?
[01:07:02]  You know what I'm saying?
[01:07:04]  You know what I mean?
[01:07:05]  The government, Uncle Sam, coming to snatch.
[01:07:07]  Get your fingers out of my pocket under Uncle Sam.
[01:07:10]  Real talk.
[01:07:11]  Get your hands out of my pocket.
[01:07:12]  Whatever.
[01:07:13]  Yeah.
[01:07:13]  I mean, this is crazy, bro.
[01:07:16]  Taxes are crazy.
[01:07:18]  Yeah.
[01:07:19]  His grimy little fingers.
[01:07:21]  You know what I mean?
[01:07:22]  Uncle Sam and his grimy little fucking fingers.
[01:07:24]  So we could do what?
[01:07:25]  What are we doing with all these taxes?
[01:07:28]  What are we doing with all these taxes, bro?
[01:07:29]  That's a good question.
[01:07:31]  Yo, infrastructure here sucks.
[01:07:33]  Infrastructure here ain't nothing.
[01:07:34]  Infrastructure is fine, bro.
[01:07:35]  Schools ain't shit.
[01:07:36]  Schools are fine.
[01:07:37]  I went to them.
[01:07:38]  You know what I mean?
[01:07:39]  Bridges are fine.
[01:07:40]  Highways, good.
[01:07:41]  Yo, let's pay taxes.
[01:07:42]  You know what I mean?
[01:07:42]  Why do we need to fix the potholes?
[01:07:44]  Make better cars.
[01:07:45]  Make better suspension.
[01:07:47]  Yeah, yeah.
[01:07:48]  Nah.
[01:07:49]  Like, come on, put it on the private businesses.
[01:07:51]  Off-road.
[01:07:51]  Make everything off-road.
[01:07:52]  Off-road.
[01:07:52]  Rav for flying cars.
[01:07:54]  But that's recommended.
[01:07:55]  Like, take Elon Musk's taxes that he owes.
[01:07:58]  Say he owes $10 billion.
[01:08:00]  Let him spend that $10 billion on something else outside.
[01:08:03]  Yeah, let me spend that money.
[01:08:05]  I wouldn't.
[01:08:05]  What would you do with the money?
[01:08:06]  I wouldn't spend it.
[01:08:07]  How about that?
[01:08:08]  What are they doing?
[01:08:09]  Say what?
[01:08:10]  Nah, it's good they took it from me because I wasn't going to spend on shit.
[01:08:12]  They ain't going to spend it on.
[01:08:13]  That's what I'm saying.
[01:08:14]  I don't know.
[01:08:15]  Whatever they was going to ask, I wasn't going to do it.
[01:08:16]  We want to do the Brooklyn Bridge.
[01:08:18]  Good luck.
[01:08:18]  I'm buying a picture of a monkey.
[01:08:20]  I'll take the Willie Burger.
[01:08:22]  Exactly.
[01:08:22]  I'm buying NFTs.
[01:08:24]  I don't give a fuck.
[01:08:25]  That would be good, though, if you get to decide what you do with your tax money, but you have to spend it.
[01:08:30]  Yep.
[01:08:30]  All right.
[01:08:30]  So what would you do?
[01:08:32]  You know what I do?
[01:08:32]  Dead ass?
[01:08:33]  Dead ass.
[01:08:34]  What would I do?
[01:08:34]  Dead ass.
[01:08:35]  After they took it, this is how it would have to be.
[01:08:37]  If you want to get the best spending, they would have to take it away from me.
[01:08:40]  And then they'd be like, nah, psych, I believe you spend it all right.
[01:08:43]  Let's slide it across the table.
[01:08:44]  And then it comes back.
[01:08:45]  So it's already gone.
[01:08:46]  And then now I get free money back.
[01:08:48]  How would I spend it?
[01:08:49]  Yep.
[01:08:50]  Wow.
[01:08:52]  Wow.
[01:08:52]  That's the question.
[01:08:53]  Wow.
[01:08:54]  That is, that's crazy.
[01:08:56]  You just described stimulus checks.
[01:08:57]  That is it.
[01:08:59]  And none of us give that shit away ever.
[01:09:01]  But it ain't getting stimulated like, boy, son.
[01:09:04]  It's different levels of stimulation.
[01:09:06]  If they gave it back to me, it's going to be a problem.
[01:09:08]  It's going to be a problem.
[01:09:09]  What do you buy first?
[01:09:10]  I'm not buying shit.
[01:09:11]  I'm keeping it.
[01:09:12]  What a problem.
[01:09:13]  That's why they got to take it.
[01:09:15]  They got to take it, bro.
[01:09:16]  They got to take it.
[01:09:16]  No, they say, hey, we're going to take it, but you can have a say.
[01:09:19]  You can have a say in it.
[01:09:20]  You know what it goes?
[01:09:20]  You just get your money.
[01:09:21]  You just get to write a.
[01:09:21]  You're not a dad yet.
[01:09:23]  Probably not going to school, but something in the comedy space, a little program, a little social shit.
[01:09:27]  Probably buy some cars.
[01:09:30]  Support the auto industry.
[01:09:31]  Support the German auto industry.
[01:09:35]  Borsch, baby.
[01:09:37]  Can they get the real one?
[01:09:40]  If you think we would put money toward a program for comedians, you got to hear it.
[01:09:43]  It's like a shuttle.
[01:09:45]  Nah.
[01:09:46]  Competition.
[01:09:46]  Come on, dove.
[01:09:47]  God damn.
[01:09:48]  Nah, these taxes are crazy, though.
[01:09:50]  These taxes crazy.
[01:09:51]  Hey, you wanted to come back, dog.
[01:09:52]  Yeah, these taxes are crazy.
[01:09:53]  They still crazy down there in Miami, too.
[01:09:55]  Yeah, but not as crazy.
[01:09:56]  Ain't no state tax.
[01:09:57]  Say what?
[01:09:58]  No state tax.
[01:09:59]  Yeah, but still, the state tax isn't what gets you.
[01:10:01]  Motherfucking federal is what gets you.
[01:10:04]  That federal government manages.
[01:10:05]  Son, are we going to Puerto Rico or what?
[01:10:07]  Son, I'm going to Monaco.
[01:10:09]  What is happening?
[01:10:10]  Yo, we're going to Monaco, son.
[01:10:12]  We're not paying no taxes.
[01:10:13]  We're a bunch of fucking European tax cheats.
[01:10:15]  A bunch of goddamn pedophiles.
[01:10:17]  Hell yeah.
[01:10:17]  Storing their money in Monaco.
[01:10:19]  Hell yeah.
[01:10:19]  You know?
[01:10:21]  So why are you going there?
[01:10:22]  Say what?
[01:10:22]  Why are you going to go?
[01:10:23]  I'm not going to be a pedophile.
[01:10:24]  I'm just going to store my money there.
[01:10:26]  You know what I mean?
[01:10:27]  Who knows how to hide things better than pedophiles?
[01:10:29]  Good ass.
[01:10:30]  You got some income you want to hide?
[01:10:31]  Yeah.
[01:10:31]  They got some come they want to hide too.
[01:10:33]  Yeah.
[01:10:34]  That was gross.
[01:10:36]  Well, you're going to live there also?
[01:10:38]  Yeah.
[01:10:38]  Yeah.
[01:10:38]  You're going to live in the place?
[01:10:40]  Say what?
[01:10:40]  You're going to live in the place where you're hiding your money?
[01:10:42]  Yeah, probably.
[01:10:42]  I don't know.
[01:10:43]  No, I'm not going to do it because I'm too fucking lazy to fight it, but I'm just tight.
[01:10:47]  So I'm just yelling at my business managers now.
[01:10:49]  I'm just, why don't you tell me more fucking ways where I could cheat the goddamn system?
[01:10:54]  Do you know what I mean?
[01:10:55]  The fuck.
[01:10:56]  Yeah.
[01:10:57]  You know, there's all these goddamn tax write-offs that we should be knowing about.
[01:11:01]  Yeah.
[01:11:01]  You know why everybody got a G-Wagon?
[01:11:03]  Why is that?
[01:11:04]  Because you can write the whole thing off.
[01:11:05]  The whole thing off.
[01:11:06]  Cars over 6,000 pounds.
[01:11:07]  You could write the whole thing off.
[01:11:08]  The Tesla SUV apparently qualifies.
[01:11:11]  I guarantee they made that shit over 6,000 pounds so you could do that.
[01:11:14]  So I want to know about all these fucking loopholes these rich motherfuckers know.
[01:11:17]  I was renting a G-Wagon, Miami, motherfucker.
[01:11:20]  That's what I said to my business manager.
[01:11:21]  I was like, the fuck you think I was doing renting a goddamn car?
[01:11:24]  I could have bought it and then got it for free.
[01:11:26]  And then put it on Toro.
[01:11:27]  It is free because you flip it out.
[01:11:29]  So you write off 100% depreciation.
[01:11:31]  Then the next year you could sell it and those things hold their value.
[01:11:33]  Matter of fact, they're selling for over.
[01:11:35]  So now you're selling it back for more and you wrote off 100% depreciation.
[01:11:39]  I know taxes now that I got to pay them.
[01:11:41]  Will you do my taxes?
[01:11:42]  Say what?
[01:11:43]  Will you do my taxes?
[01:11:44]  You, you're good.
[01:11:45]  You're good.
[01:11:46]  Just give the government that money.
[01:11:47]  You don't even need to worry about it.
[01:11:48]  That shit is a boomerang.
[01:11:50]  If you don't pay it, the government's like, all right.
[01:11:52]  It is what it is.
[01:11:53]  You know what I'm saying?
[01:11:54]  If I don't pay, they come and collect.
[01:11:56]  Send me a tax.
[01:11:56]  Like, come on, bro.
[01:11:57]  Yeah, man.
[01:11:58]  Yo, really?
[01:11:58]  They're going to do this.
[01:11:59]  They go, really, bro?
[01:12:00]  Really, family?
[01:12:01]  I can't take this from you.
[01:12:02]  I can't take this from you.
[01:12:02]  That's what they're saying.
[01:12:03]  Fucking taxes, bro.
[01:12:05]  I get why motherfuckers.
[01:12:07]  You know what I mean?
[01:12:08]  No, I don't.
[01:12:09]  You commit tax fraud?
[01:12:10]  Yeah, I get it.
[01:12:10]  No, not that.
[01:12:11]  You get what you're saying.
[01:12:12]  Is that what you're saying?
[01:12:13]  No, he's saying I get my credit card.
[01:12:14]  No.
[01:12:15]  I wasn't going to say that.
[01:12:16]  I was going to say tax fraud, I think.
[01:12:18]  No, I wasn't going to say tax fraud.
[01:12:20]  I get why.
[01:12:22]  You know what I'm saying?
[01:12:23]  Like, motherfuckers pay their tax attorney, tax account.
[01:12:28]  I'm trying to find out how to say he's like, you know what I'm saying?
[01:12:31]  You know what I'm trying to say?
[01:12:33]  Maximizing their if the South left the North, not for slavery.
[01:12:40]  If they was like, yo, slavery's whack.
[01:12:42]  Like, we got to stop slavery, but y'all got to stop taxing us.
[01:12:45]  Where's the flag, baby?
[01:12:47]  We out.
[01:12:48]  You know what I mean?
[01:12:49]  Like, let's go.
[01:12:51]  Right?
[01:12:52]  Yes or no?
[01:12:52]  Yeah.
[01:12:53]  If the South just said, we're leaving America.
[01:12:56]  We're leaving the North.
[01:12:57]  All we got to do, if anybody who just doesn't want to pay taxes is come down here with the boys.
[01:13:02]  It's done.
[01:13:02]  But then what happens when you're clear?
[01:13:03]  The South Blue Rise again.
[01:13:04]  What happened when my car falls in a home, huh?
[01:13:06]  Yeah, exactly.
[01:13:07]  Do I look like I live in Belize to you?
[01:13:08]  But you're going to live in Belize if there's no taxes.
[01:13:10]  It's cements, bro.
[01:13:12]  It's cements.
[01:13:13]  Who's paying?
[01:13:13]  We've been bombing the Middle East forever.
[01:13:15]  They still be driving fucking cars around.
[01:13:17]  Get a FCU V, dog.
[01:13:19]  Get a G-Wagon.
[01:13:20]  Depreciate 100%.
[01:13:22]  And in the new South, it depreciates 200%.
[01:13:24]  Really?
[01:13:25]  It's free G-Wagons for everybody.
[01:13:27]  Yes, that's the rules.
[01:13:28]  I didn't know that.
[01:13:29]  Yes, it is.
[01:13:29]  Are you going to be president of the South?
[01:13:30]  No.
[01:13:31]  Why?
[01:13:32]  I don't want to do all that.
[01:13:34]  That's too much work.
[01:13:35]  I just want to enjoy the wealth that the North don't get anymore.
[01:13:37]  What the fuck are you doing with this money I'm sorry about?
[01:13:39]  I'm trying to get some teachers.
[01:13:40]  Say what?
[01:13:40]  What about teachers?
[01:13:41]  I don't know, but some teachers need to thank me this year.
[01:13:44]  Paying for their asses.
[01:13:46]  Them firemen need to say hello to me when I walk down the street.
[01:13:48]  Your police on fire.
[01:13:49]  They need to salute you.
[01:13:51]  I want all that.
[01:13:52]  You live in the South.
[01:13:52]  Your house is on fire.
[01:13:53]  No taxes.
[01:13:53]  Who's coming?
[01:13:54]  They don't have fires in the South.
[01:13:57]  They don't have fires in the South.
[01:13:58]  Maybe one time there was a fire in the South.
[01:14:00]  Charleston Fire.
[01:14:01]  No.
[01:14:01]  Yeah.
[01:14:02]  No.
[01:14:02]  Uh-huh.
[01:14:02]  No, that was the North brought that shit to Charleston.
[01:14:05]  Wait, really?
[01:14:05]  Yeah, General Tecumseh Sherman, total war.
[01:14:07]  Scorched earth.
[01:14:08]  Scorched motherfucking earth.
[01:14:09]  And that shit came from where?
[01:14:11]  Them tax-hungry northern pigs.
[01:14:14]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:14:15]  Okay.
[01:14:16]  Your house burns down.
[01:14:17]  You got all that tax savings.
[01:14:18]  You buy a new house.
[01:14:19]  Damn right.
[01:14:20]  And you get insurance.
[01:14:21]  We're still going to have insurance in the new South.
[01:14:23]  Damn it.
[01:14:24]  Yes.
[01:14:26]  Oh, I didn't know about the South.
[01:14:28]  You didn't know that we're going to have new insurance in the South.
[01:14:31]  I didn't read the pamphlet.
[01:14:32]  The new free South.
[01:14:33]  Atlanta's going to be the capital.
[01:14:34]  What about police?
[01:14:35]  Oh, I love that.
[01:14:36]  Atlanta is the capital, bro.
[01:14:37]  That's good PR, too, because y'all get to run it.
[01:14:42]  However, y'all want black people, y'all want to pay taxes?
[01:14:44]  Nah.
[01:14:45]  Okay.
[01:14:45]  No, we don't.
[01:14:46]  Okay, PPP loan, forgiven.
[01:14:48]  Oh, y'all fucked over the northern government with them PPP loans?
[01:14:52]  Forgiven.
[01:14:53]  You need to run.
[01:14:53]  You need to run.
[01:14:54]  I'll be already running as fast as y'all.
[01:14:57]  I'm a jog for president of the south, but we're not going to get into a running competition.
[01:15:01]  Let's go.
[01:15:01]  Okay, no, I'm serious.
[01:15:02]  Finally.
[01:15:03]  The new South.
[01:15:04]  Unless, of course, the North is interested in my offer.
[01:15:08]  In which case?
[01:15:09]  Fuck them Southerns, bro.
[01:15:12]  We're taking it up north.
[01:15:13]  No taxes.
[01:15:14]  Okay.
[01:15:14]  First thing we did to stop slavery.
[01:15:16]  Second thing we did is stop slavery from the state.
[01:15:18]  Taxation is slavery.
[01:15:20]  Yeah.
[01:15:20]  Yeah, we're slaves.
[01:15:21]  We're slaves to the government, and we got to stop it again.
[01:15:24]  Yeah.
[01:15:25]  I'm Abraham Lincoln in this bitch.
[01:15:27]  I'm stopping taxation.
[01:15:29]  There's no more taxes, bro.
[01:15:31]  Four scored.
[01:15:32]  And seven years ago, young Schultze came on the scene paying too much goddamn money in taxes.
[01:15:39]  Seven or years ago.
[01:15:40]  Say what?
[01:15:40]  Four scores is a long time.
[01:15:42]  How old is that?
[01:15:42]  How many scores?
[01:15:43]  10 years?
[01:15:43]  It's like 20 years, yeah.
[01:15:44]  Wait, what's the score?
[01:15:45]  Seven, right?
[01:15:46]  No.
[01:15:46]  No, that's not.
[01:15:47]  It's not football rules.
[01:15:48]  Now we have to be five scores.
[01:15:49]  Five scores.
[01:15:50]  He wouldn't say four score and seven years ago.
[01:15:51]  He just said five scores.
[01:15:52]  What the fuck is a score?
[01:15:53]  I think it's 20.
[01:15:54]  It's like when these British people use stone.
[01:15:57]  You know what I mean?
[01:15:58]  I lost four stones.
[01:15:59]  It's like, bro, shut up.
[01:16:00]  20 years.
[01:16:01]  What is four scores, 20 years?
[01:16:03]  87 years ago.
[01:16:03]  No, no.
[01:16:04]  One score.
[01:16:04]  Yeah.
[01:16:05]  20 years.
[01:16:05]  It's 20 years.
[01:16:06]  G's up.
[01:16:08]  One scored 18 years ago.
[01:16:09]  One score in 18 years ago.
[01:16:10]  Your boy slid out Sandra Cameron.
[01:16:12]  Let's go.
[01:16:13]  Mad difficult.
[01:16:18]  Mad difficult.
[01:16:20]  Like, I don't know.
[01:16:20]  Maybe it wasn't dilated or maybe mama got it like that.
[01:16:23]  Damn.
[01:16:23]  You know what I mean?
[01:16:24]  And she was 35.
[01:16:25]  I came out at 35.
[01:16:27]  You know, not a lot of room in the womb.
[01:16:29]  You know what I'm saying?
[01:16:30]  That's why my skin's so tight.
[01:16:31]  How many weeks were you in?
[01:16:32]  Say what?
[01:16:34]  Say what?
[01:16:35]  How many weeks?
[01:16:36]  How many weeks?
[01:16:37]  I was in there like eight months.
[01:16:38]  Your boy was ready to go.
[01:16:39]  Oh, really?
[01:16:40]  Yeah, premature.
[01:16:41]  10 pounds and premature.
[01:16:42]  Preemie?
[01:16:43]  If I went to nine months.
[01:16:44]  This explains it.
[01:16:45]  Yeah.
[01:16:46]  You didn't know I'm preemy, bro.
[01:16:48]  Nah.
[01:16:48]  100%.
[01:16:49]  I didn't know.
[01:16:49]  So you're younger than I thought.
[01:16:50]  Say what?
[01:16:51]  You're younger than I thought.
[01:16:52]  Yeah, by at least a month.
[01:16:54]  I am younger, right?
[01:16:57]  I've been here longer.
[01:16:58]  That's a good ass point.
[01:16:59]  That's a good ass point.
[01:17:00]  Just booty yourself.
[01:17:01]  Not your fucking mind.
[01:17:02]  Just booty yourself.
[01:17:04]  It was making sense.
[01:17:06]  No, I wasn't premature.
[01:17:07]  You were overature?
[01:17:09]  I think I was overature.
[01:17:11]  I think I was overature.
[01:17:13]  For real.
[01:17:14]  I was post-mature.
[01:17:14]  I was most mature.
[01:17:15]  You just overcooked.
[01:17:16]  I was definitely overcooked.
[01:17:17]  I came out full head of hair.
[01:17:18]  I told y'all this, right?
[01:17:19]  Is that true?
[01:17:19]  Where they thought they left me at the hospital?
[01:17:21]  When I was in the room with all the other babies, I had full head of hair.
[01:17:24]  Like I was big as fuck.
[01:17:25]  And they thought that my parents just left me at the hospital.
[01:17:28]  Why did they think they left you?
[01:17:30]  Because I was grown, fam.
[01:17:31]  I was like talking to the nurses.
[01:17:33]  I was like, I'm not going around for this.
[01:17:35]  I was like, y'all want to bust the titty out?
[01:17:37]  Your boy hungry?
[01:17:39]  No, I'm numb, bro.
[01:17:40]  No, I'm numb.

=== Fascism, Dictatorship, And Taxes (03:31) ===

[01:17:42]  But yeah, so I think that we have to do a new thing with taxation.
[01:17:44]  Who's not on board with that?
[01:17:47]  I'm on board.
[01:17:48]  Taxes should be 25% until you make crazy money.
[01:17:51]  That's zero.
[01:17:52]  And then it's not what you think you should contribute.
[01:17:55]  It's church, bro.
[01:17:56]  That shit worked for church, right?
[01:17:58]  You might think nothing of it.
[01:17:59]  Yo, churches be making money.
[01:18:00]  That's a good point.
[01:18:00]  Church would be making money.
[01:18:03]  They don't even ask for 10%.
[01:18:04]  They just give you a little fucking bucket.
[01:18:05]  It's an offering trade.
[01:18:06]  There should be a tax offering.
[01:18:08]  Oh, hey, I offer you my tax plate.
[01:18:10]  How much do I put in it?
[01:18:11]  I would just do the country.
[01:18:13]  Inheritance, the country.
[01:18:14]  I'm going to keep all my taxes forever.
[01:18:15]  When I die, you get all of it.
[01:18:17]  Boom.
[01:18:18]  I don't need it anymore.
[01:18:18]  What about your children?
[01:18:19]  And then if you spend that shit, if you spit, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, you're going to fuck your kids.
[01:18:27]  Holy Jim Jones, this guy just went dip set on his fucking kids, bro.
[01:18:32]  What is happening right now?
[01:18:34]  Mark, not even from Harlem.
[01:18:37]  No, you say you just save up all your money, but then motherfuckers are going to spend all their money before they die.
[01:18:41]  And what they're going to do is they're going to spend it on their kids' businesses, and they're going to find a way to transfer that wealth without paying a piper.
[01:18:47]  That's fucked up.
[01:18:47]  But if I get to choose what I'm going to do, that's what your platform is.
[01:18:50]  I'll save it up till I die, and then you get all my money.
[01:18:52]  Boom.
[01:18:52]  I'll give it right to you.
[01:18:53]  But there might not be any money left.
[01:18:54]  And also, we need missiles and shit to make.
[01:18:56]  If I knew I was making missiles, bro, that's different.
[01:18:59]  You might be able to get this money.
[01:19:00]  In the south, you're making missiles for sure.
[01:19:02]  100%.
[01:19:02]  And if I could fire them, if I could press the button, if there's like a fucking wedding.
[01:19:06]  In the South.
[01:19:07]  Hell yeah.
[01:19:07]  If there's an Iraqi wedding and we think a terrorist is there and I get to push the button, that's worth my tax money.
[01:19:12]  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:19:13]  What?
[01:19:13]  There's a terrorist.
[01:19:14]  You're only going to hit the terrorists, right?
[01:19:15]  I'm only going to hit the terrorists.
[01:19:17]  And if you don't?
[01:19:17]  Come on.
[01:19:17]  These are drone strikes, bro.
[01:19:19]  It's very accurate.
[01:19:20]  What do you think this is?
[01:19:21]  A Brazilian rock?
[01:19:23]  That's how our drone strikes me, right?
[01:19:25]  Yeah.
[01:19:26]  Jeez.
[01:19:28]  What?
[01:19:30]  Okay?
[01:19:31]  Point is, there's better ways to do it.
[01:19:32]  There's a better system, and we can be the change that we want to see in the world.
[01:19:35]  That's what I've been saying.
[01:19:36]  Show us for president 2030.
[01:19:37]  I'm not going to be president.
[01:19:38]  I'm a prime minister.
[01:19:39]  Yeah, PM.
[01:19:40]  I'm a PM.
[01:19:42]  Do you know what I mean?
[01:19:43]  Legs all open.
[01:19:44]  I don't know what.
[01:19:45]  What?
[01:19:47]  Why are you going to be PM?
[01:19:48]  You changed as a socialist?
[01:19:49]  No, I'm not going to be socialist.
[01:19:51]  We're going to be the opposite.
[01:19:52]  Fascist.
[01:19:53]  Okay.
[01:19:55]  Can we be fascist?
[01:19:55]  I think so.
[01:19:56]  Has anybody done that right?
[01:19:57]  No, no.
[01:19:58]  That's the thing.
[01:19:58]  It's like communism.
[01:20:00]  Like, everyone always says it's bad, but no one's ever done it.
[01:20:02]  The right fascism.
[01:20:03]  Nobody even knows what fascism is.
[01:20:04]  You'll be the right fascist.
[01:20:06]  Can I be honest with you?
[01:20:06]  If you know the definition of fascism, you're a f ⁇ ing.
[01:20:11]  I mean that.
[01:20:13]  You don't mean that.
[01:20:14]  I mean that.
[01:20:15]  What is it?
[01:20:16]  Good thing, because I'm about to look it up.
[01:20:17]  Yeah, exactly.
[01:20:18]  Because you're not there, bro.
[01:20:19]  You're not, right?
[01:20:20]  Jump straight up.
[01:20:21]  You don't know what a fascist is.
[01:20:22]  No, come on, bro.
[01:20:24]  F-A-G-I-C-S-M.
[01:20:27]  What's a fascist?
[01:20:28]  Mark, what's a fascist?
[01:20:29]  Why are you asking me?
[01:20:30]  Like, I know.
[01:20:31]  You were taught in school with your Marxist education.
[01:20:35]  What's a fascist?
[01:20:36]  What's the fascist?
[01:20:37]  Well, what do we teach you about?
[01:20:39]  He's been talking about Shabbat dinner.
[01:20:41]  They always talk about fascism.
[01:20:42]  An authoritarian government.
[01:20:45]  Okay.
[01:20:45]  Damn, that was a struggle.
[01:20:46]  Fucking hate those liberal cucks.
[01:20:48]  Liberal democracy is not open.
[01:20:51]  But is it the government is connected with the businesses or something like that?
[01:20:53]  Is that one leader?
[01:20:54]  F-A-C-L-N-O-T-W-O-N-C control.
[01:20:57]  And they're not saying that it's like the belief like communism or like everyone's working together.
[01:21:01]  They're like, no, one dude at the top is control everything.
[01:21:06]  Centralized autocratic government headed by a dictorial leader.
[01:21:09]  Yeah.
[01:21:09]  And then what's bad about it?
[01:21:12]  No one's ever done it right.

=== Native Deodorant And Illegal Pigeons (05:16) ===

[01:21:13]  Yo, Singapore, lit.
[01:21:15]  Yeah.
[01:21:15]  They're fascism.
[01:21:17]  Well, they got a dictatorship.
[01:21:18]  Oh, shit.
[01:21:19]  All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second because it's a new year, and who doesn't want to make some easy changes to their personal hygiene routine to make it a little cleaner?
[01:21:27]  That's where Native comes in, okay?
[01:21:29]  Native's aluminum-free deodorant and body washes are never made with parabens or sulfates and are both cruelty-free.
[01:21:39]  Beyond their customer favorite classic deodorant, of course, Native also offers sensitive and plastic-free options.
[01:21:47]  The sensitive formula is made without baking soda for those with more sensitive skin.
[01:21:53]  And the packaging for their plastic-free deodorant is made out of 100% paperboard.
[01:21:58]  And if you can't get enough of native scents, you got to try their body wash, okay?
[01:22:01]  They got plenty of different scents, and their body wash is heavy, rich lather that leaves skin feeling moisturized and conditioned long after you shower.
[01:22:10]  To kick off this new year, Native has partnered with Bake by Melissa with a collection of scents inspired by Bake My Melissa's delicious cupcake creations.
[01:22:19]  You can choose from all them.
[01:22:20]  Go there, check it out.
[01:22:22]  So this year, up your personal hygiene routine with Native.
[01:22:26]  Go to nativedo.com.
[01:22:28]  That's n-a-t-i-v-e-d-e-o.com slash flagrant or use the promo code flagrant at checkout and get 20% off your first order.
[01:22:38]  That's nativedeo.com slash flagrant or use the promo code flagrant at checkout for 20% off your first order.
[01:22:45]  And let's get back to the show.
[01:22:46]  Well, since you like Singapore so much, here's some laws that they have.
[01:22:49]  All right.
[01:22:49]  Love it.
[01:22:49]  Give me the laws.
[01:22:50]  All right.
[01:22:50]  I've got not been to Singapore.
[01:22:52]  We learned for a thousand dollar fine for annoying others with musical instrument or singing in public.
[01:22:57]  Puerto Rican.
[01:22:58]  How many Puerto Ricans are in Singapore?
[01:22:59]  Look at the Puerto Rican population of Singapore.
[01:23:01]  They're all in jail, bro.
[01:23:01]  Wait, but what about the Showtime motherfuckers on the train?
[01:23:04]  Yeah, that's them, too.
[01:23:05]  Do you think that they have that?
[01:23:05]  Come on, bro.
[01:23:06]  Do you think they have Showtime on a train?
[01:23:08]  Hell yeah.
[01:23:08]  In Asia.
[01:23:08]  They have kung fu and flips and shit.
[01:23:10]  Yes, they are.
[01:23:11]  And how do you arrest them when they smoke bomb out of there?
[01:23:14]  How are you going to arrest them?
[01:23:15]  I didn't think about that.
[01:23:16]  How are you going to arrest them?
[01:23:17]  When they have the ability to disappear, Alex.
[01:23:19]  But aren't the police kung fu motherfuckers also?
[01:23:21]  Yeah, but they're not going to operate to the same place.
[01:23:25]  They don't know where their fucking layer is.
[01:23:28]  Alex, they don't know where their layer is.
[01:23:30]  Guy, they're gonna operate back to their lair, and that's it.
[01:23:34]  Jesus, dude, this guy does nothing, dude.
[01:23:37]  All right, go.
[01:23:37]  How about this?
[01:23:38]  Okay, three years in prison, or and/or a $10,000 fine for connecting to someone else's Wi-Fi.
[01:23:44]  Y'all, fuck them, fuck them, bro.
[01:23:47]  Fam, like, act like you don't feel like this when somebody does this to you.
[01:23:51]  You got to put yourself in the shoes of the aggrieved person, yeah, or sandals or sandals, too, because it's more of a sandal climate.
[01:23:57]  I'm gonna be honest, it is, yeah.
[01:23:59]  I mean, it's hot, bro.
[01:24:00]  You can't walk around no Tim's there.
[01:24:02]  They got motherfucking fan suits.
[01:24:05]  Wait, what?
[01:24:05]  Tim's is a woman.
[01:24:06]  When they do construction out there, remember them dudes?
[01:24:08]  Fan suits.
[01:24:09]  Yeah.
[01:24:10]  They have a fan blowing air into the suit.
[01:24:12]  They all look like Missy Misdemeanor Elliot.
[01:24:15]  Feeding pigeons.
[01:24:16]  That's a $500 fine.
[01:24:17]  Say what?
[01:24:18]  Feeding pigeons.
[01:24:18]  Dude, fuck pigeons.
[01:24:19]  They should never eat.
[01:24:20]  Smoking in public.
[01:24:21]  That's another $500.
[01:24:22]  That's disgusting.
[01:24:23]  I don't believe that.
[01:24:24]  Walking around your own house naked three months or a $2,000 fine.
[01:24:27]  I was thinking about that today.
[01:24:28]  I was thinking about that today.
[01:24:29]  Should that be illegal?
[01:24:30]  Whoa, whoa, whoa.
[01:24:31]  No, this is actually interesting.
[01:24:32]  Can I walk around my apartment naked, knowing full well that the people across the street can see me?
[01:24:36]  For you, yes.
[01:24:37]  It should be illegal.
[01:24:38]  But is it indecent exposure?
[01:24:39]  Why for me?
[01:24:40]  No, because your balls hang crazy out the back.
[01:24:42]  They shouldn't be.
[01:24:43]  They shouldn't be looking.
[01:24:45]  That's for them.
[01:24:46]  Because your balls are insane, bro.
[01:24:51]  Looking around on my hands and feet.
[01:24:56]  You walked around tucked to the back.
[01:24:59]  You swing shit around like a billy club, bro.
[01:25:02]  That shit's insane.
[01:25:05]  Should be like a homeless person.
[01:25:07]  You look like Santa Claus.
[01:25:08]  Oh, it should be illegal.
[01:25:09]  No, it does look crazy from behind for me.
[01:25:12]  It looked like some brother.
[01:25:12]  Can you spare a dime?
[01:25:13]  Shit.
[01:25:14]  Remember the Dust Bowl dudes with a little stick.
[01:25:16]  That's what I'm saying.
[01:25:17]  Yeah.
[01:25:17]  You got your knapsack.
[01:25:18]  That's what it is.
[01:25:20]  Not flushing the toilet.
[01:25:21]  That's illegal.
[01:25:22]  But isn't that illegal for me to just walk around naked in my home knowing that other people could see it?
[01:25:25]  It shouldn't be.
[01:25:26]  It shouldn't be.
[01:25:26]  But at the same time, if we live in such close proximity, there could be like children that look out their window innocently and then they could see a naked dude.
[01:25:33]  But they got blind.
[01:25:34]  They just see silhouette.
[01:25:35]  They're not seeing.
[01:25:36]  Fam.
[01:25:37]  Come on.
[01:25:37]  You saying, you saying I make the room dark.
[01:25:39]  Kick it.
[01:25:43]  I ain't scared of you.
[01:25:44]  I'm scared of you, motherfuckers.
[01:25:46]  Well, they might not know it's a grown naked man.
[01:25:49]  They might think it's a St. Bernard's ears or something.
[01:25:53]  The neighborhood.
[01:25:56]  They might think it's a donkey.
[01:25:59]  Okay.
[01:26:01]  We have a guest.
[01:26:02]  Yeah.
[01:26:02]  We have a guest.
[01:26:03]  Ding-dong.
[01:26:04]  Ding-dong.
[01:26:05]  Bing-bong.
[01:26:07]  We have a guest in a motherfucking bed.
[01:26:08]  It's not bing-bong.
[01:26:11]  Not everybody's going to think it's mams while it's in here.
[01:26:13]  You said ding-dong.
[01:26:14]  That is true.
[01:26:14]  We have a guest.
[01:26:15]  So we have to bring our guests in here, but there might be one more story that we have to cover before our guest gets in here.
[01:26:20]  Because we're going to do feelings, no facts with our guests.
[01:26:22]  That's how we rock shit with the guests.
[01:26:23]  Yeah.
[01:26:24]  Okay.
[01:26:24]  But what do we have to cover right before that?
[01:26:26]  Everything.
[01:26:27]  Yeah.

=== Kanye West And Kim Kardashian Drama (14:41) ===

[01:26:29]  Six topics.
[01:26:30]  Yeah, we didn't cover another.
[01:26:31]  Let's just cover it.
[01:26:31]  You know, whatever.
[01:26:32]  All right.
[01:26:32]  We're going to do one more and then we're going to bring in Mark.
[01:26:35]  All right.
[01:26:35]  Spin the wheel, my brother.
[01:26:36]  Kick it.
[01:26:37]  Kick it.
[01:26:38]  You want to talk about Kanye and Julia Fox?
[01:26:40]  Yes.
[01:26:42]  Okay, go.
[01:26:45]  Talk about it.
[01:26:47]  The best way to get back at your ex Kanye is doing this to get back at his ex.
[01:26:54]  Yes.
[01:26:54]  Right.
[01:26:54]  And I don't even know if he's doing it to get back at it, but maybe he's doing it to like change public perception about him because he was kind of getting dragged via Kim's relationship.
[01:27:03]  Yeah.
[01:27:03]  Right.
[01:27:04]  So now it's like the conversation has been shifted to Kanye and his fake relationship that he is masquerading at.
[01:27:14]  Yeah, he's going over the top.
[01:27:16]  He's going over the top.
[01:27:16]  Like mad corny.
[01:27:18]  Like bringing a photographer with him.
[01:27:19]  But what's your option?
[01:27:20]  You can either be Will Smith and be like, oh shit.
[01:27:22]  Super cucked.
[01:27:23]  Or you go over the top and be like, I respect the Kanye.
[01:27:25]  Dude, that is a great way of the white girl with a fat dumper.
[01:27:28]  White girl with a fat dumper is unstoppable.
[01:27:30]  There are white girls with fat dumpers that for some reason are not famous.
[01:27:36]  Like, they're satisfied just like being on Instagram or like modeling fucking yoga pants or some shit.
[01:27:42]  And it's just like, you know what you could do?
[01:27:45]  You're unstoppable.
[01:27:46]  Yeah.
[01:27:47]  White girl fat dumper.
[01:27:48]  Unstoppable?
[01:27:49]  Alex.
[01:27:50]  Yeah.
[01:27:51]  For him, for sure.
[01:27:51]  Absolutely.
[01:27:52]  They got their own point category.
[01:27:54]  They do.
[01:27:55]  Pardon?
[01:27:56]  Fog.
[01:27:57]  What is it?
[01:27:57]  Say it again.
[01:27:58]  Fog.
[01:27:58]  Fog?
[01:27:59]  Fog.
[01:28:00]  Fat ass white girl.
[01:28:01]  That's Pog, bro.
[01:28:02]  Pog.
[01:28:02]  There we go.
[01:28:04]  Yeah.
[01:28:04]  What is that?
[01:28:08]  What is Pog?
[01:28:10]  I think it's fat ass white girl, but it's spelled with PH.
[01:28:12]  Oh.
[01:28:15]  That's what I was getting there.
[01:28:16]  Fat ass white girl.
[01:28:18]  Yeah.
[01:28:19]  Yeah.
[01:28:19]  I got you.
[01:28:20]  Yeah.
[01:28:20]  According to the definition, it's an offensive sexist term.
[01:28:22]  You describe a white woman who has a large butt.
[01:28:24]  No.
[01:28:26]  What dumb bitch wrote that difference?
[01:28:27]  Yeah.
[01:28:28]  Hand.
[01:28:28]  Hating.
[01:28:29]  Skinny ass bitch.
[01:28:30]  Hand, bro.
[01:28:30]  Yeah.
[01:28:31]  I hate her, dog.
[01:28:32]  Okay.
[01:28:32]  But this is why it's a great up because it's just a younger Kim.
[01:28:36]  White girl fat dumper.
[01:28:37]  That's what Kim was.
[01:28:38]  It really is.
[01:28:39]  That Kim got kids.
[01:28:40]  Fucking disgusting.
[01:28:41]  I like them.
[01:28:42]  God leave.
[01:28:43]  Golly.
[01:28:46]  She got kids.
[01:28:46]  That shit is gross.
[01:28:48]  Nah, she's a milk now.
[01:28:49]  That's lit.
[01:28:49]  No, you're not a woman anymore once you had kids.
[01:28:51]  Dad, you're a mom.
[01:28:52]  You know, that's some Indian shit.
[01:28:54]  That is some Indian shit.
[01:28:55]  Wrap her in silk, bro.
[01:28:57]  It's over.
[01:28:59]  Defile my mom.
[01:29:01]  You can't defile a mom like that, yo.
[01:29:03]  But you don't think that you'll continue to make love to your wife once you guys are.
[01:29:06]  She stopped already.
[01:29:08]  Let's go.
[01:29:10]  That's what's up, bro.
[01:29:11]  No, but he got the younger her.
[01:29:12]  That's what I'm saying.
[01:29:13]  You got the new white girl with a fat dumper.
[01:29:16]  Kim, we've been seen.
[01:29:17]  Now it's just like, oh, I got you.
[01:29:19]  But yo, but you got to eat away your ego.
[01:29:21]  This is Kanye doing it for him.
[01:29:23]  He wants to know if he's still got it.
[01:29:25]  He takes Amber out the strip club, turns her into a star.
[01:29:28]  Takes Kim from doing sex tapes with Ray J, turns her into a star.
[01:29:31]  So he took the movie star and turned her into a dumper.
[01:29:33]  But she's still like, she's not there.
[01:29:34]  A white girl with a dumper?
[01:29:36]  She's not up there.
[01:29:36]  Nah, she wasn't up there yet.
[01:29:37]  That's a great point.
[01:29:38]  And he wants to know if he could still do it.
[01:29:40]  And it's crazy because it's happening.
[01:29:41]  Yep.
[01:29:41]  This girl to an interview.
[01:29:42]  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:29:44]  And yeah, this is kind of 100%.
[01:29:46]  I'm just saying he could have probably, you know, had a bigger transformation than a girl that's already in movies.
[01:29:51]  Not that she's famous, but there's something.
[01:29:53]  You know what I mean?
[01:29:53]  You got a really black girl famous.
[01:29:56]  Yeah, nobody's going to be able to do it.
[01:29:56]  Nobody was talking about her.
[01:29:57]  Nobody's talking about her.
[01:29:58]  Now people are talking about her.
[01:29:59]  Of course.
[01:29:59]  So he's ultimate stroke to ego.
[01:30:02]  Like, he's crazy.
[01:30:05]  Yeah, that is actually impressive.
[01:30:07]  It's not even about the girls.
[01:30:09]  It's about if he can make a saying about the MAGA hat.
[01:30:13]  It's like, can I make this cool?
[01:30:14]  Can I feed this?
[01:30:15]  Make black rain boots cool.
[01:30:17]  Yeah.
[01:30:17]  I'm not going to lie.
[01:30:18]  Them boots, them, like the ones that look like a bubble jacket.
[01:30:22]  Those are fire.
[01:30:22]  I would wear them shits.
[01:30:24]  You know what I'm saying?
[01:30:25]  I would not.
[01:30:26]  Not most.
[01:30:26]  I would say most.
[01:30:27]  I would say most.
[01:30:28]  I think he was missing for a minute, bro.
[01:30:31]  He was missing for a minute.
[01:30:32]  Just when he was on that MAGA hat shit, I wasn't rocking his stuff, but it's still kind of.
[01:30:36]  It's heat.
[01:30:37]  You like the MAGA?
[01:30:38]  You were into the MAGA hat a little bit?
[01:30:40]  Well, not his, though, had like the cool brim.
[01:30:42]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:30:43]  And a patch on the side.
[01:30:46]  That's what I tell people.
[01:30:46]  Whenever I rock the MAGA hat, they're like, more, what are you doing?
[01:30:48]  I don't know.
[01:30:48]  That's a Kanye one.
[01:30:49]  It's cool.
[01:30:49]  Yeah.
[01:30:51]  Why did they do that for off-white?
[01:30:52]  That's like literally.
[01:30:56]  That's on-white bro.
[01:30:57]  Oh, yeah.
[01:30:57]  That's on white.
[01:30:59]  Damn, bro.
[01:31:00]  Yeah, man.
[01:31:01]  Okay, so this is the super flex, and this is what it is.
[01:31:03]  He found the perfect thing to fit his ego.
[01:31:05]  And everybody's talking about it.
[01:31:07]  There's so much attention.
[01:31:08]  He's happier than he's ever been.
[01:31:09]  He's about to drop fire music.
[01:31:11]  Do you think he's going to be inspired?
[01:31:13]  I hope so.
[01:31:13]  Yeah.
[01:31:15]  He might still be too religious.
[01:31:17]  He had Donda.
[01:31:18]  He was supposed to be hungry again.
[01:31:19]  And it didn't really.
[01:31:20]  There was tracks on the street.
[01:31:21]  There were tracks.
[01:31:21]  There were tracks, but it wasn't life of Pablo.
[01:31:24]  That's true.
[01:31:24]  That's true.
[01:31:25]  You know what's interesting?
[01:31:26]  Hearing the girl, Julia Fox, talk about their dates.
[01:31:29]  These interviews are so funny.
[01:31:30]  Like one of them ones, she was like, and then after dinner, we went back to the hotel and he had gotten all these clothes into the hotel.
[01:31:37]  My whole room was clothes.
[01:31:38]  I didn't even know how he did it.
[01:31:39]  And it's like, you don't know how he got clothing into a hotel?
[01:31:43]  Have you ever traveled before?
[01:31:45]  Have you ever traveled with clothing?
[01:31:46]  He just pre-planned it because he like landed that day.
[01:31:48]  So he like landed and went straight to dinner or whatever the case is.
[01:31:52]  And then like, oh, Alex, I know.
[01:31:54]  Nah, but shit.
[01:31:55]  She's pointing out the fact that he just touched down that day and then had all this whole thing.
[01:31:59]  And had all that shit planned.
[01:32:00]  Yeah, yeah, like he's not Kanye fucking West.
[01:32:02]  Yeah, how does a billionaire who's in charge of a clothing company get such a thing done?
[01:32:05]  Yeah.
[01:32:06]  I mean, it's seamless.
[01:32:07]  It's kind of like a bad thing.
[01:32:08]  I get sushi to my apartment in 30 minutes.
[01:32:10]  I can't get four sweaters to hang on a rack.
[01:32:13]  How do you do that?
[01:32:13]  Sushi?
[01:32:14]  Yeah.
[01:32:14]  You never done seamless?
[01:32:16]  I've heard of it, I think.
[01:32:17]  Come on, bro.
[01:32:18]  Hey, priority delivery, dog.
[01:32:20]  Do that shit.
[01:32:21]  Yeah.
[01:32:21]  Door dash, bro.
[01:32:22]  They got it, man.
[01:32:23]  They're worth it.
[01:32:24]  Yeah, you can try it sometimes.
[01:32:26]  Nah, he still gets home-cooked meals with this guy.
[01:32:28]  Oh, that's right.
[01:32:29]  For now, we'll see.
[01:32:30]  We'll see.
[01:32:30]  I keep trying to keep that going.
[01:32:31]  Yeah.
[01:32:32]  Like buying equipment and shit.
[01:32:33]  I got a pasta maker.
[01:32:34]  I'm like, yeah, that's good.
[01:32:37]  Keep him moving, bro.
[01:32:38]  Anyway, so yay.
[01:32:39]  So what do you think the next move is?
[01:32:40]  You don't think he's actually going to marry her?
[01:32:42]  This is not like a real thing.
[01:32:43]  Oh, I think it's real.
[01:32:45]  Really?
[01:32:45]  Yeah.
[01:32:46]  Interesting.
[01:32:47]  And do you think it's possible that they could be both so addicted to clout that they believe in their relationship?
[01:32:53]  So like, and this is maybe a little tieback to like the Tom Brady AB thing.
[01:32:58]  It's like, I think Tom Brady and I think, I think AB are friends.
[01:33:02]  And AB brought up this thing where he's like, I mean, why am I your friend?
[01:33:05]  Because I'm good at football.
[01:33:06]  And it's like, yeah.
[01:33:08]  Yeah.
[01:33:09]  And if that's the only reason why you guys are still friends after knowing each other for a year, that's on you.
[01:33:15]  Like, you could have developed other things.
[01:33:17]  He had you in his house.
[01:33:18]  Yeah.
[01:33:19]  Like, y'all live together.
[01:33:20]  You couldn't form a real connection?
[01:33:22]  Watch some fucking Country Western movies or some shit.
[01:33:25]  Like, have something else that you have connected on, right?
[01:33:28]  Like, so what I'm hearing, but it is totally normal if two people are passionate about the same thing that they could be friends, right?
[01:33:34]  I mean, like, the shittiest version of this is obviously like drug addicts, but like you see it, I think, a lot of times with your passions, comedy.
[01:33:40]  Like, there's a lot of people that are friends because of comedy and they share a passion, the most important things of their lives.
[01:33:46]  And then if they both quit comedy, they might not be homies no more.
[01:33:49]  So I wonder if they actually both believe that they like each other because they're both getting fed with so much positive attention, which is the real thing that they're addicted to.
[01:33:58]  Like a crackhead couple who really believes they're in love, but in reality, they both just out here trying to get that crack.
[01:34:05]  So I'm like, does it start to morph your feelings?
[01:34:08]  Like, will the girl start going, I think I actually really like him?
[01:34:12]  Yeah.
[01:34:12]  And will Kanye start going, nah, I'm really feeling this girl.
[01:34:15]  Maybe I'm feeling so filled by this other stuff in my life.
[01:34:19]  I think this is, yeah, I think it's just complete revenge.
[01:34:22]  She, she, Kim dumped him.
[01:34:25]  He's begging to have her back in concerts.
[01:34:27]  Yeah.
[01:34:27]  She with Pete Davidson, this young fucking kid who already fucked everybody.
[01:34:32]  He's eating all the negative PR.
[01:34:33]  She's getting all the good PR.
[01:34:35]  And he's like, oh, you don't think two could play at this game?
[01:34:38]  We can go.
[01:34:39]  I'll fuck.
[01:34:40]  I have threesomes in fucking hotels.
[01:34:41]  I'll get with this girl.
[01:34:42]  I'll live it up.
[01:34:43]  You must have forgot.
[01:34:44]  I'm richer than you.
[01:34:46]  Bro, you know what's crazy?
[01:34:47]  Kanye did like three different black girls and nobody gave a fuck.
[01:34:50]  Yeah.
[01:34:50]  One white girl, bro, with a fat ass.
[01:34:53]  The entire internet is on fire.
[01:34:55]  Did you notice that?
[01:34:56]  No.
[01:34:57]  Like he was on dates with a few black chicks.
[01:34:59]  Nobody said anything.
[01:35:00]  He had a hotel.
[01:35:00]  Two black shorties came out the room.
[01:35:02]  There was a picture.
[01:35:03]  People said it.
[01:35:04]  Don't even mention their names.
[01:35:05]  That's like it's like fabricated.
[01:35:07]  That like he's putting out all the stories.
[01:35:09]  He's like pushing all the narrative that he wants.
[01:35:11]  He got to be.
[01:35:12]  Oh, yeah.
[01:35:12]  And that's why he's just selecting the girls that he's trying to.
[01:35:15]  Yeah.
[01:35:15]  He's working out the joke.
[01:35:16]  It's like, what tag works?
[01:35:18]  What punchline works?
[01:35:19]  Ooh, white girl fat ass?
[01:35:20]  All right, let me go back to the well.
[01:35:21]  Like he tried out the sisters, and then the internet didn't run for it.
[01:35:25]  One white girl with a fat ass.
[01:35:26]  Yeah.
[01:35:28]  Front page.
[01:35:29]  He's like an impressions comic.
[01:35:32]  You try to do these jokes, but it's like, uh-uh-uh.
[01:35:34]  Do that, Christopher Walken fan.
[01:35:37]  Yeah.
[01:35:38]  All right.
[01:35:39]  Well, listen, we got a guest that we got to bring in here.
[01:35:40]  So we're going to stop down for a second, and then we're going to come back with some more stories and feelings.
[01:35:44]  No facts.
[01:35:45]  All right.
[01:35:46]  All right.
[01:35:46]  What's up, everybody?
[01:35:47]  We're back.
[01:35:48]  And we're back with a good buddy of mine from the UK, from across the pond.
[01:35:52]  Comedian Adam Rowe is in the building.
[01:35:54]  Okay.
[01:35:57]  First time on Flagrant 2.
[01:35:58]  Adam Rowe is here.
[01:35:59]  I met Adam when I was filming views from his sis.
[01:36:02]  You met him as well.
[01:36:03]  Yeah.
[01:36:04]  And I know that he doesn't remember you, but he's going along with it.
[01:36:07]  But it's okay.
[01:36:08]  It's fine.
[01:36:10]  No, no, no.
[01:36:10]  He don't remember.
[01:36:11]  He don't remember white people.
[01:36:12]  I don't remember white people.
[01:36:13]  Don't take it personal.
[01:36:15]  It is what it is.
[01:36:16]  I had two different dudes open for me in London.
[01:36:19]  Okay.
[01:36:19]  Remember we filmed?
[01:36:20]  We put the.
[01:36:21]  Only thing I remember was the food after when we went to the food.
[01:36:24]  We went to Indian food.
[01:36:25]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:36:26]  Did you come with us to that?
[01:36:27]  No.
[01:36:28]  I ate with you beforehand, though, so that means you ate twice on that last year.
[01:36:31]  Yes, we did.
[01:36:33]  We might have done that.
[01:36:34]  So basically, Adam opened up for me when I was doing one of the London shows.
[01:36:39]  And he reached out and he had a really funny clip about your girl trying to peg you or something like that.
[01:36:45]  And I remember I was like, because there were different people that reached out and they would send clips.
[01:36:49]  And I was like, all right, let me just look.
[01:36:51]  I never look.
[01:36:51]  Yeah, yeah.
[01:36:52]  But for one reason, I just decided to look you up.
[01:36:54]  And that was the one that I clicked.
[01:36:55]  And it was really fucking funny.
[01:36:57]  What was it?
[01:36:59]  I don't want to make you do the bit, but you can.
[01:37:00]  The idea of the bit was a girl once was like, can I fuck you in the ass?
[01:37:04]  And I was like, you haven't got a dick.
[01:37:06]  And she's like, I've got a strap on, obviously.
[01:37:09]  And I'm like, that's not obvious.
[01:37:10]  That's never obvious.
[01:37:12]  You've got to open with that.
[01:37:13]  And she's like, oh, well, I was like, did you just buy that assuming I'd be into it?
[01:37:17]  This is all true, by the way.
[01:37:18]  This all happened.
[01:37:19]  I was like, you've bought that just and brought it here, assuming I'd do it.
[01:37:23]  And she was like, oh, no, I've used it loads of times.
[01:37:24]  I was like, we're getting a new one.
[01:37:28]  At least.
[01:37:29]  Like, I could maybe be talking.
[01:37:32]  Like, we need a new one.
[01:37:34]  She's like, I've cleaned it.
[01:37:34]  I'm like, there isn't enough bleach on the planet to make that go near my asshole.
[01:37:39]  It's not happening.
[01:37:40]  So, did it happen or not?
[01:37:42]  No, I've never done it.
[01:37:43]  Okay.
[01:37:43]  No.
[01:37:44]  I was always wondering about that.
[01:37:45]  But we didn't have enough of a rapport for us to get into that initially.
[01:37:48]  But you did great, and that was a lot of fun.
[01:37:50]  And then I've really seen you fucking blow up and your podcast.
[01:37:53]  I watch the clips you guys are putting out all the time.
[01:37:54]  What's your podcast co-host name?
[01:37:56]  It's called Have A Word.
[01:37:57]  No, no, but your co-host.
[01:37:57]  What's his name?
[01:37:58]  Dan Nightingale.
[01:37:59]  Dan Nightingale.
[01:38:00]  Yeah, That shit is fun, man.
[01:38:02]  You guys have a good anyway.
[01:38:03]  So you're here, and now you're on Flagrant 2, and we're going to get into it because a lot of things that we haven't spoken about just yet, but we wanted to get you in the room.
[01:38:10]  One thing that I want to help you understand because you're here in America and I want you to learn about American culture.
[01:38:15]  Yeah.
[01:38:15]  And I think it's important that we start with American cultural stories.
[01:38:19]  And are you familiar with Jim Jones and Dipset?
[01:38:23]  No.
[01:38:24]  Okay, well, Jim Jones is a rapper.
[01:38:25]  You probably heard some of his songs.
[01:38:27]  And he said recently that he learned how to make out from his mom.
[01:38:31]  Yeah, I have the clip here.
[01:38:32]  You want to see?
[01:38:32]  Oh, yeah.
[01:38:32]  Maybe you should play it.
[01:38:33]  Yeah, I'll pull it up.
[01:38:34]  What?
[01:38:34]  Shout out to Angela Yi.
[01:38:36]  What?
[01:38:38]  No.
[01:38:38]  Shout out to Angela Yee and lip service.
[01:38:44]  Yeah, my mom showed me how to kiss when I was younger.
[01:38:47]  What did she tell you to do?
[01:38:48]  She told me how to tongue kiss when I was younger.
[01:38:50]  Like, what's the instructions?
[01:38:52]  There wasn't no instructions.
[01:38:53]  She showed me with her mouth.
[01:38:54]  Like, she's.
[01:38:55]  She kissed you?
[01:38:56]  It's my mother.
[01:38:57]  Knock his ass.
[01:39:00]  I can say it like that.
[01:39:02]  Raj Kayak didn't like she's the idiot.
[01:39:09]  Stop kissing her.
[01:39:10]  She showed me how to tongue kiss when I was younger.
[01:39:13]  Remember, my mom was 17.
[01:39:15]  She doesn't change.
[01:39:16]  She's babies.
[01:39:17]  Look at all the babies.
[01:39:18]  That's how you suck out my advice.
[01:39:20]  And look how they act with their babies.
[01:39:21]  It's like they have a little sister or a little brother more than they scratched.
[01:39:25]  Did you think that's my personal?
[01:39:27]  Yeah, that's right.
[01:39:28]  All right, pause it.
[01:39:29]  All right, so what's the limits?
[01:39:32]  Because, yeah, the only reason we're like slightly okay with this is obviously because it's a mom doing something to her son.
[01:39:39]  Yeah.
[01:39:39]  Right?
[01:39:39]  Like, you can't teach your daughter how to do that.
[01:39:41]  If a girl was like, Yeah, my dad taught me how to, you know, yeah, say it.
[01:39:45]  Say it.
[01:39:45]  No, it's not saying it.
[01:39:49]  Pops taught you how to give throw.
[01:39:51]  100%.
[01:39:52]  And you can't do that.
[01:39:53]  But here's the fucked-up thing: you want your kid to be prepared for life.
[01:39:57]  Yeah, no, no.
[01:39:59]  You don't want your daughter to be bad at sucking dick, Sam.
[01:40:02]  I do, actually.
[01:40:03]  Do you really?
[01:40:04]  Yeah, yeah, you just gotta get cheated on and shit all the time.
[01:40:07]  You're the only girl in Liverpool can't suck dick.
[01:40:10]  I want, I just don't, I'm not comfortable knowing that I've produced the queen.
[01:40:14]  Can I say one thing, Dick?
[01:40:15]  Can I say one thing?
[01:40:16]  You don't have to be the queen, but two, if she's bad, she has to suck dick longer for more cumulative hours.
[01:40:21]  Yeah, right, okay.
[01:40:22]  Yeah, and we don't say queen of sucking dick over here, bro.
[01:40:24]  Come on.
[01:40:24]  Yeah, it's a president of sucking dick.
[01:40:27]  We empty shit out, bro.
[01:40:28]  We fought a war.
[01:40:30]  There's never been a female president, though.
[01:40:32]  That's a good point.
[01:40:38]  No, but for real, think about that.
[01:40:39]  They got to suck dick more if they suck dick bad.
[01:40:42]  So you're actually helping your daughter suck dick less.
[01:40:44]  I don't know.
[01:40:45]  Your daughter's going to suck dick.
[01:40:46]  I don't know whether that's an exact science, though.
[01:40:48]  How do you know?
[01:40:48]  Because, right, here's my angle on it, right?
[01:40:51]  Okay.
[01:40:52]  If I'm getting my dick sucked and it's good, I start thinking about horrific shit to make it last longer.
[01:40:57]  Listen, if she's bad at sucking dick, the guy's going to want to get it over as quick as possible.
[01:41:00]  But it's not up to you.
[01:41:01]  That's me at work.
[01:41:02]  I don't decide.
[01:41:03]  I don't decide what's a nut.
[01:41:04]  They decide.
[01:41:05]  That's not true.
[01:41:05]  Dead ass, I swear to God, my life.
[01:41:07]  So you can't just be like, I'm done with this.
[01:41:09]  I'm just going to let it out.
[01:41:10]  No.

=== Avoiding The Sucking Dick Question (05:07) ===

[01:41:11]  What?
[01:41:12]  They got to squeeze it out.
[01:41:13]  Matter of fact, if their hand is like putting pressure in the wrong direction, like if they squeeze down, I'm not going to come.
[01:41:19]  Wait, what?
[01:41:20]  They're pushing to come back.
[01:41:22]  Put the kid.
[01:41:23]  Put the kid.
[01:41:23]  Do this.
[01:41:25]  They're going to like this.
[01:41:27]  I don't like it.
[01:41:27]  That's psychosomatic, I think.
[01:41:28]  I don't think that's a real thing.
[01:41:29]  I am a little psychosomatic.
[01:41:32]  But if they twist like that, then it comes out.
[01:41:34]  I get pricked up right now.
[01:41:37]  Oh, that was crazy just right now.
[01:41:39]  So, yeah, for real.
[01:41:40]  I've been going over this with my wife.
[01:41:42]  Like this.
[01:41:44]  We've been learning.
[01:41:44]  We've been learning.
[01:41:45]  It's in a cake.
[01:41:47]  Exactly.
[01:41:47]  We're going to be here for a while.
[01:41:49]  It's all about the top.
[01:41:50]  The top.
[01:41:50]  Yeah.
[01:41:51]  Yeah.
[01:41:51]  Just do this on the top of your head.
[01:41:53]  Man, you nut.
[01:41:53]  Yeah, yeah.
[01:41:55]  She's a kitty cat?
[01:41:56]  Yeah, like it's a cat's nose.
[01:42:02]  Okay, so you wouldn't tell your daughter that you don't have to show her, but you wouldn't.
[01:42:06]  Like, let's say that.
[01:42:07]  But you wouldn't even have to suck dick.
[01:42:08]  That's just finger jobs.
[01:42:09]  Yeah.
[01:42:10]  Ba-ba-ba-ba.
[01:42:11]  Mate, I mean, I'm not going to tell her, look, this is how daddy acts it, but maybe I'm going to laugh.
[01:42:15]  Don't say daddy.
[01:42:17]  Daddy is crazy.
[01:42:19]  Dudes like that.
[01:42:20]  Listen, I've heard some guys like it this way.
[01:42:23]  Just you don't even need to put it in your mouth, just do this.
[01:42:25]  Just do that.
[01:42:25]  Just spit on your finger and do that.
[01:42:26]  So you would help her suck dick.
[01:42:29]  I know it sounds crazy.
[01:42:30]  I'm just, it sounds crazy.
[01:42:32]  No, but you don't want your daughter to have the best relationship.
[01:42:38]  It's not about being the best, okay?
[01:42:40]  The journey's a destination, bro.
[01:42:41]  Yeah.
[01:42:42]  It's about learning how to be the best.
[01:42:43]  Yeah.
[01:42:44]  So it's about all the dick-sucking practice she gets.
[01:42:46]  Yeah.
[01:42:47]  I'm just saying.
[01:42:48]  You either teach her or some fucked-up dude who's going to teach you.
[01:42:51]  I'm sending his daughter to the dick-sucking Olympics.
[01:42:54]  Now, that is a great point.
[01:42:55]  If you teach her, maybe you're the fucked-up dude, but I wouldn't teach her in any kind of sexual way.
[01:42:58]  Maybe I tell my wife to do it.
[01:42:59]  Wife get in there.
[01:43:00]  No, wife.
[01:43:02]  No, they just learn.
[01:43:03]  Come on now.
[01:43:04]  Just learn.
[01:43:04]  You're not going to teach your son how to do things sexually.
[01:43:07]  You're going to teach your son how to suck dick.
[01:43:08]  I'm fucking awesome.
[01:43:08]  You're telling me your dad taught you how to finger?
[01:43:11]  No.
[01:43:11]  Exactly.
[01:43:12]  Don't think it's like my mom, though.
[01:43:14]  My dad's 70 years old.
[01:43:15]  They didn't do it.
[01:43:16]  I wouldn't know.
[01:43:16]  My dad got the fucking heart.
[01:43:18]  Yeah, my dad got a big dick, bro.
[01:43:20]  Yeah, fighting her in for what?
[01:43:22]  For what?
[01:43:23]  These are going to loosen you up?
[01:43:24]  No way.
[01:43:26]  I tell my daughter how to peg a dude.
[01:43:28]  Yes.
[01:43:29]  Okay.
[01:43:29]  Yes.
[01:43:30]  Teach the daughter.
[01:43:31]  Would you teach your daughter how to peg?
[01:43:33]  If your daughter wanted to be trans.
[01:43:35]  Fresh.
[01:43:35]  Yeah, fresh.
[01:43:36]  She wanted to be trans, but she needed someone to teach her how to fuck.
[01:43:40]  Would you do it?
[01:43:41]  What?
[01:43:44]  Wouldn't I need to know how to do it in the first place?
[01:43:47]  No, you just need to know how to fuck.
[01:43:48]  She's putting on a dick so that she can fuck.
[01:43:50]  You know how to have a dick.
[01:43:52]  I don't know what happened in your teenage years to get us to this point.
[01:43:56]  That's not an answer.
[01:43:58]  You avoiding the answer.
[01:43:59]  No, no, no.
[01:44:00]  No, I'm not avoiding the answer.
[01:44:01]  It's just going to be slightly long-winded.
[01:44:03]  Did you like your daughter's dick sucks?
[01:44:07]  Did you not learn how to do all this shit on your own?
[01:44:09]  Yeah, I did.
[01:44:10]  So you don't need to be the, you don't need to be the guy coming in going, by the way, before you like, you look great, before you go out on the date tonight, yeah, leave the doorbell.
[01:44:17]  We'll get that in a minute.
[01:44:18]  Here's what you need to do later.
[01:44:20]  I care about women.
[01:44:21]  Do you?
[01:44:22]  And I want them to have the most satisfying sexual experiences possible.
[01:44:26]  I think that's what I'm saying.
[01:44:27]  Do you teach your son how to eat pussy?
[01:44:28]  Say again?
[01:44:29]  Did you teach your son how to eat pussy?
[01:44:30]  My dad taught me how to eat pussy.
[01:44:32]  He demonstrated your mom made you watch it.
[01:44:33]  No, I just walked.
[01:44:35]  Just give him a yogurt and no spoon.
[01:44:41]  Like, yeah, remember that?
[01:44:43]  Do that again later.
[01:44:44]  Did you do it in subtle ways?
[01:44:46]  That dad's eating a cantaloupe and just winking at me.
[01:44:51]  Oh, fuck me.
[01:44:52]  All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second because y'all need to step your wallets up.
[01:44:55]  Your wallets are trash.
[01:44:56]  Okay.
[01:44:57]  And you know who's going to help you do that?
[01:44:58]  Exter.
[01:44:58]  They make the best wallet on the planet.
[01:45:00]  Why is the best wallet on the planet?
[01:45:01]  Because it allows you to get the shit that you need.
[01:45:04]  Okay.
[01:45:04]  You don't have one of these tiny little wallets.
[01:45:06]  You're busy trying to grab your Amex out of it.
[01:45:08]  It's stuck in.
[01:45:09]  There's a long line of Starbucks and you're holding everybody up.
[01:45:11]  You're a big pain in the ass.
[01:45:12]  Never with Exter.
[01:45:13]  You see that?
[01:45:14]  You see that?
[01:45:15]  You see that quick card access?
[01:45:16]  Immediately grab whatever card I want.
[01:45:19]  Pay for my shit.
[01:45:20]  I'm not a nuisance to anybody.
[01:45:22]  What else do they have?
[01:45:22]  They also have the key tracker features, okay?
[01:45:26]  It's trackable worldwide.
[01:45:28]  This is the one wallet you're not going to lose.
[01:45:30]  It gets voice activation if your wallet is lost.
[01:45:34]  You just call it.
[01:45:34]  Works with Google Home, Alexa, and Siri.
[01:45:36]  It's also solar powered.
[01:45:38]  So for two hours of sunlight, it's going to give you three months of charge.
[01:45:41]  Okay.
[01:45:41]  It's very simple.
[01:45:42]  You got this.
[01:45:43]  You can make it happen.
[01:45:44]  You got to compare the thickness of this to an average wallet.
[01:45:47]  I'm telling you.
[01:45:47]  This is just an absolute no-brainer.
[01:45:50]  You got to do it.
[01:45:51]  You got to do it.
[01:45:52]  Exter offers smart solutions to improve how you carry your everyday essentials.
[01:45:56]  This is going to be the one that you use.
[01:45:57]  So if you want to check out the wallets at exter.com, that's e-k-s-t-e-r.com.
[01:46:02]  All you got to do is use the promo code flagrant at checkout, and then you're going to get 30% off your order.
[01:46:08]  You got this.
[01:46:09]  Remember, that's extra.com.
[01:46:10]  Use the code flagrant at checkout.
[01:46:12]  You're going to get 30% off.
[01:46:14]  20% off for everybody.
[01:46:15]  Flagrant gets 30.
[01:46:16]  That's how we do it.
[01:46:17]  That's how we do it.

=== Solar Powered Wallet For Indians (08:28) ===

[01:46:18]  We don't play around out here, boy.
[01:46:20]  Let's get back to the show.
[01:46:21]  I'm just saying, there is a line where, and it's obviously really tricky when it comes to sexual shit, but I do understand a parent wanting their kid to be good at something.
[01:46:31]  And when he brings up the thing about how she was a young mom, like, I think that kind of plays into it a little bit.
[01:46:37]  Nah, fair.
[01:46:38]  Nah, because that makes it seem like you can make out your sister.
[01:46:40]  Say what?
[01:46:40]  That makes it seem like you can make out with your sister because there's not much.
[01:46:43]  That's what he said.
[01:46:43]  It's like, it's almost like a brother-sister relationship.
[01:46:46]  That's why he's justifying it.
[01:46:48]  Everyone's sister to you, bro.
[01:46:50]  But people, I think my mom told me she might have made out with one of her cousins or something.
[01:46:53]  That's Scotland.
[01:46:56]  I think back in the day that happened.
[01:46:57]  That's a step over fucking a sheep.
[01:46:59]  It's like, all right.
[01:46:59]  I didn't say she didn't do that.
[01:47:00]  Okay, wait, what?
[01:47:03]  She begged a sheep.
[01:47:04]  She begged a sheep.
[01:47:05]  That's how you practice begging.
[01:47:07]  See, in the UK, we put all that on Wales.
[01:47:09]  So not Scotland.
[01:47:11]  Scotland.
[01:47:12]  We don't really fuck with Scotland.
[01:47:13]  Scotland could beat the shit outs of England whenever they want to.
[01:47:15]  Like, whenever they decide.
[01:47:16]  Oh, forget it.
[01:47:17]  Wait, what?
[01:47:18]  Say that shit.
[01:47:19]  What?
[01:47:19]  Which is chess.
[01:47:21]  Why don't you, you cucks?
[01:47:22]  Yeah.
[01:47:22]  Listen, because he's comfy, bro.
[01:47:24]  Yeah, they're just up there.
[01:47:24]  They're just comfortable with their man skirts on.
[01:47:27]  They're just happy over the day.
[01:47:28]  That's what we do.
[01:47:28]  Yeah.
[01:47:29]  Talk about the Indians.
[01:47:31]  That's how confident they are in Scotland.
[01:47:32]  The men wear skirts and they're like, say something.
[01:47:34]  Say something.
[01:47:35]  Say something.
[01:47:36]  I'll say something.
[01:47:40]  What about the Indians in the UK?
[01:47:42]  Yeah?
[01:47:44]  We ran, yeah.
[01:47:46]  A lot of them, bro.
[01:47:47]  What's the national dish?
[01:47:49]  Fish and chips.
[01:47:50]  Yeah.
[01:47:50]  Fish and chips.
[01:47:51]  It is curry, actually.
[01:47:52]  See?
[01:47:52]  It was actually quite funny a couple of years ago.
[01:47:54]  There's a politician who's like known for being quite sort of anti-immigration, anti-racist, and he had this big speech about we want great British curries made in Great Britain.
[01:48:04]  We want our curries back.
[01:48:05]  It's like, what?
[01:48:07]  What are you talking about?
[01:48:09]  We need American tamales, bro.
[01:48:11]  But we always get into little beefs, though.
[01:48:12]  Yeah.
[01:48:13]  Yeah.
[01:48:13]  About our ancestry.
[01:48:15]  Okay.
[01:48:15]  And I just want to know what the Indians are like in the UK.
[01:48:19]  Because now we know the Scots are the shit.
[01:48:20]  Nobody wants to fuck with them.
[01:48:21]  They're not there.
[01:48:22]  They don't let you in.
[01:48:22]  They let you stay where you are.
[01:48:24]  What do you mean now?
[01:48:25]  In your trans community.
[01:48:26]  We're talking about the UK.
[01:48:27]  Don't call my people trans.
[01:48:29]  Don't you dare call my people trans.
[01:48:31]  They're not trans.
[01:48:32]  They're crushed.
[01:48:34]  That's all biggest to me.
[01:48:35]  You're cross-dressing.
[01:48:36]  Y'all are really trans.
[01:48:36]  You have a whole sector trans in India.
[01:48:38]  We do it.
[01:48:39]  What are they called?
[01:48:40]  I don't know.
[01:48:42]  They have a whole genre?
[01:48:44]  Class.
[01:48:45]  Cast genre.
[01:48:46]  They have a cast of trainings.
[01:48:47]  You have a training cast.
[01:48:48]  This is a fact.
[01:48:49]  No, it's not a cast.
[01:48:50]  What is it?
[01:48:50]  They're just people who ask you for money and then you give it to them.
[01:48:52]  And if you don't have anything to do with it, all of you ask for money.
[01:48:54]  All of you ask for money.
[01:48:56]  You all need money.
[01:48:56]  No, no, we negotiate just on the train.
[01:48:58]  We don't need money.
[01:48:58]  We negotiate to keep our money.
[01:49:00]  We don't ask you for yours.
[01:49:01]  You're saying only trainees begin.
[01:49:02]  That's their trans.
[01:49:03]  They'll ask you for your money.
[01:49:06]  I don't know what the fuck is happening.
[01:49:08]  Do they cut their cocks off or not?
[01:49:10]  I don't know.
[01:49:11]  But they be looking like dudes and they're women.
[01:49:14]  Whether or not they keep transforming.
[01:49:15]  And if you don't give them money, it's bad luck.
[01:49:16]  Bad luck.
[01:49:17]  I know about this.
[01:49:18]  I just said that.
[01:49:19]  Say what?
[01:49:20]  I just said that eight seconds ago.
[01:49:22]  See, there's women like this from Romanian descent in London.
[01:49:25]  Oh, yeah, gypsies.
[01:49:26]  Yeah, they just come up and they try and sell you a flower.
[01:49:28]  Yeah.
[01:49:29]  And if you get right in their eye line and don't buy it, you have a bad week.
[01:49:33]  Really?
[01:49:34]  You just fuck think bad things.
[01:49:35]  So you just buy, you have to not make eye contact.
[01:49:38]  The second you make eye contact, you've got to buy the flower.
[01:49:40]  And they have the sleepy kids, right?
[01:49:42]  They drag their kids.
[01:49:42]  Yeah.
[01:49:43]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:49:43]  That's a European thing.
[01:49:44]  We don't really have them back here.
[01:49:46]  The thing with Indians in the UK, though, is they just get on with their own business.
[01:49:51]  They run their restaurants.
[01:49:52]  They run their shops.
[01:49:52]  And then you don't really see them.
[01:49:54]  But the best thing you ever see is when you're in Scotland and you go to a curry house and an Indian guy comes over with the thickest accent.
[01:50:05]  Scottish accent you've ever seen.
[01:50:07]  Who won?
[01:50:07]  You never can.
[01:50:08]  Bitch.
[01:50:09]  Who won, bitch?
[01:50:10]  Not bobbling your head or nothing.
[01:50:12]  You're Scottish now.
[01:50:13]  He's still eating our food, ain't he?
[01:50:14]  Fuck you, dude.
[01:50:15]  Fuck you.
[01:50:16]  Fuck you.
[01:50:18]  Ain't there no fucking Chinese or something we can eat, bro?
[01:50:21]  Anyone in here, Haggis?
[01:50:24]  I ain't seen a Scottish restaurant ever in the world.
[01:50:26]  No, that's facts.
[01:50:26]  We got trash food.
[01:50:27]  I'm not going to even argue with that.
[01:50:28]  Urnbrew is good.
[01:50:28]  I like that.
[01:50:29]  Urnbrew.
[01:50:30]  Oh, no, it's awful.
[01:50:31]  What is that?
[01:50:31]  Beer?
[01:50:32]  Urnbrew.
[01:50:33]  You like that?
[01:50:34]  That's got to be a new thing.
[01:50:35]  The best hangover cure.
[01:50:39]  This is a beverage.
[01:50:40]  Yeah.
[01:50:40]  It's like orange.
[01:50:41]  And Scottish people have it on like cereal instead of milk.
[01:50:45]  It's the only country in the world where Coca-Cola is not the number one selling soft drink.
[01:50:49]  Yeah, I heard that.
[01:50:50]  Because they like, we want our thing.
[01:50:52]  They don't like anything brand.
[01:50:55]  So, baby, we do our own thing.
[01:50:57]  What y'all do?
[01:50:58]  What's the number one soft drink in India?
[01:51:00]  Probably Coke.
[01:51:01]  Or thumbs up.
[01:51:03]  Thumbs up.
[01:51:04]  Thumbs up.
[01:51:04]  Yeah.
[01:51:04]  What's that?
[01:51:05]  It's their Coke.
[01:51:06]  But they don't spell thumb with a B.
[01:51:08]  It's just T-H-U-M-S up.
[01:51:11]  It's like flat Coke.
[01:51:12]  Gotcha.
[01:51:13]  And then they got Limco, which is good.
[01:51:14]  It's like a lot of people.
[01:51:16]  Happened there is that's when a country got colonized and they just wanted to hold on to one thing.
[01:51:19]  They're like, We're not having the beef.
[01:51:24]  We're gonna spell thumb the way we want to spell thumb.
[01:51:27]  Yo, here's a real question: like, when you grow up learning about history in the UK, like we, when we grew up learning about history in America, right?
[01:51:34]  Like, they talk about all the great things that America did and they kind of skirt over the fuck shit.
[01:51:39]  Like, we talk about like slavery a little bit.
[01:51:41]  It's not crazy long, but like Vietnam, I don't even think we don't even mention Korea.
[01:51:46]  Yeah, like, but you guys had this long history.
[01:51:49]  So, how much are you like flexing?
[01:51:51]  Like, are you talking about the glory days when y'all used to run shit everywhere?
[01:51:54]  Like, no, the idea of empire has just never touched on.
[01:51:57]  Basically, the only thing I can remember from history is divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived, and that's the six wives of Henry VIII.
[01:52:06]  Yeah, it was just like basically history class from like the age four to 16 is just right, it's Henry VIII weekend, and we're gonna talk about this guy.
[01:52:15]  Do you talk about Revolutionary War?
[01:52:16]  No, don't even mention women dying.
[01:52:19]  My introduction to the Revolutionary War was going to see Hamilton, really, yeah, and how they played your king.
[01:52:25]  That was foul.
[01:52:26]  The one white guy is the bad guy, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's yeah, it was my introduction to it, and so you didn't even know what happened.
[01:52:34]  No, I knew that at some point we had a control over America, and then eventually.
[01:52:38]  You ever talk about the fall of the British Empire, the rise of the British Empire?
[01:52:42]  No, it's just basically we had this fat king once, and if he didn't like his wife, he either killed her or she died mysteriously.
[01:52:50]  It's literally the only thing I remember.
[01:52:54]  I think you're not even dumb.
[01:52:57]  So, okay, this is fascinating.
[01:52:59]  And then, like, so the identity isn't wrapped around running the whole world because you don't have ran the whole world, no, so at all.
[01:53:05]  So, what is the identity?
[01:53:06]  Like, what is um, it's not we're the best country in the world, yeah, totally.
[01:53:13]  So, here's something else to think about.
[01:53:15]  Like, I'm from Liverpool, yeah, and there's a huge disconnect between Liverpool as a city and England and the United Kingdom as a state.
[01:53:24]  Oh, really?
[01:53:24]  Liverpool's very if Liverpool was given the option to vote for independence, they'd go now.
[01:53:29]  Obviously, it would be a retarded thing to do because we're a tiny port city that we can't grow anything, yeah.
[01:53:35]  But the people in Liverpool would be like, like, we don't really support the England football team.
[01:53:39]  Then, why did you guys love Margaret Thatcher so much?
[01:53:44]  Oh, the anger.
[01:53:47]  Oh, that hurts Andrew.
[01:53:50]  Oh, so this is Margaret Thatcher was the uh first female prime minister of uh Great Britain, and then she did not like y'all, man.
[01:53:59]  What the fuck was that?
[01:54:00]  She did not like Liverpool or the North or anything.
[01:54:02]  So, basically, the government before her like created was trying to move towards almost a socialist society of like the workers' own things, the workers are important, and all that stuff.
[01:54:14]  And it didn't really work out.
[01:54:15]  So, she came in and she was like, We're gonna shut the mines, we're gonna do everything.
[01:54:18]  But, like, Liverpool in particular, there's a long history of hatred towards that woman because there's a huge football disaster in which a lot of people died.
[01:54:27]  The Hillsborough disaster, the Liverpool fans were blamed for the disaster, even though it's been proved that it was the police who caused it.
[01:54:33]  And Margaret Thatcher covered it up so that the police would never get in trouble.
[01:54:36]  Like, when Margaret Thatcher died, like, the news hit the headlines, celebration.
[01:54:41]  We went out.
[01:54:42]  Me, my best mate, my little brother.
[01:54:44]  My little brother had never been like to bars drinking before.

=== Margaret Thatcher Cover Ups (15:31) ===

[01:54:47]  He's obviously drank in the house and stuff.
[01:54:48]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:54:49]  But he'd never been out, and she died.
[01:54:50]  And I was like, We're gonna go to town and I'll just take you to the bars.
[01:54:54]  I know I can get you in because I can talk to the dormer.
[01:54:56]  He knows who we are.
[01:54:57]  And we went out, and literally, every single bar we went into that night, every two songs, they'd stop the song and they'd shout Maggie, Maggie, Maggie, and the whole room would go dead, dead, dead.
[01:55:11]  Like the capable of the shit, man.
[01:55:13]  You'd love Liverpool.
[01:55:14]  Really?
[01:55:15]  Yeah.
[01:55:15]  I love the accent and I love it for comedy.
[01:55:18]  Like there are certain like comedic, I don't know, there's certain like, not even the accent, but it's like the rhythm of how you guys speak.
[01:55:26]  Cadence.
[01:55:27]  It is perfect for comedy.
[01:55:28]  Yeah, it works.
[01:55:29]  Glasgow's great for that as well.
[01:55:30]  Yeah.
[01:55:31]  Like Kevin Virginia.
[01:55:34]  Every sentence has got a full stop on it.
[01:55:36]  Yep.
[01:55:36]  Yep.
[01:55:36]  And that works great, especially if you've got punchlines.
[01:55:39]  The accent over here is hilarious when, like, I don't think you will have ever experienced this because you're American.
[01:55:45]  So everywhere you go, people have heard, in every film they've ever seen, just people who sound like you.
[01:55:51]  So you can speak exactly how you speak here.
[01:55:54]  Like my girlfriend Samuel's in the next room.
[01:55:56]  She's been looking at me like, what the fuck are you talking like that for when I'm talking for waiters and stuff?
[01:56:00]  Because I'm trying to just soften.
[01:56:02]  Even on stage at the cellar, I'm like softening it because no one's used to it.
[01:56:06]  I've had comics come up to me.
[01:56:08]  I've had three people ask me where I'm from.
[01:56:10]  Like, well, more than that, but like a couple of people, one waitress was like, you from Liverpool?
[01:56:14]  Oh, I love Liverpool, right?
[01:56:16]  Other people thought I was Irish.
[01:56:17]  Other people thought I was Scottish.
[01:56:19]  Yeah.
[01:56:19]  And one guy guessed Syrian.
[01:56:22]  And who goes straight to Syrian?
[01:56:24]  Syrian.
[01:56:25]  He was trying to prove how open-minded he was and not assume some white shit.
[01:56:28]  You're a very fucking idiot, this guy.
[01:56:30]  I think just I look, I could look like someone who, because I'm hairy and the eyebrows, I think I could look like someone Middle Eastern who's maybe seriously ill.
[01:56:39]  I'm a beyond that.
[01:56:40]  You know what I mean?
[01:56:40]  I'm going to be honest?
[01:56:41]  No.
[01:56:43]  As a brown person, he says, no.
[01:56:47]  All right, Mark, what else we got?
[01:56:48]  All right, you want to talk about Antonio Brown real quick?
[01:56:50]  You want to spray this?
[01:56:51]  Yes.
[01:56:54]  Real quick, I think it's just fascinating, man.
[01:57:00]  I do think it's just so interesting, like how a country decides what you're going to learn and how that curates the identity, right?
[01:57:07]  And like, maybe you just never forget, like, I always wonder about this.
[01:57:11]  Like, everybody talks about the transition.
[01:57:12]  Like, China's going to take over.
[01:57:14]  China runs the world.
[01:57:14]  And it's like, in China, do they already run the world?
[01:57:17]  And in America, have we just not taught ourselves that yet?
[01:57:20]  Yeah.
[01:57:20]  Yeah.
[01:57:21]  Like, are we going to be the last one?
[01:57:22]  Are we the rapper that's the last one to know he fell off?
[01:57:25]  Yeah.
[01:57:25]  The COVID thing has really bumped that up in my mind of how much, especially since I've been here.
[01:57:31]  Yeah.
[01:57:32]  Of how much the information you get given is so where you are.
[01:57:37]  So like everywhere in Manhattan is masks and vaccine mandates.
[01:57:41]  Every bar you go into, could you put your mask on?
[01:57:44]  Can I see your ID in your vaccine thing?
[01:57:46]  Liverpool is quite a rebellious city anyway.
[01:57:48]  So we've from the start been like, we'll sort of do whatever we want to do.
[01:57:51]  And yeah, if the police are over there, we'll put the mask on.
[01:57:53]  Like, hi, police officer.
[01:57:54]  Now fuck you and take it back off.
[01:57:56]  People walking around the streets of New York with masks on.
[01:58:00]  Yeah, it's insane.
[01:58:01]  Like, is insane to me.
[01:58:03]  That's never been a thing in the UK.
[01:58:05]  New York got it.
[01:58:05]  It's soft, dog.
[01:58:06]  Hey, hey, it's a lot of people.
[01:58:10]  Fucking Texans moved here.
[01:58:11]  That's what I think.
[01:58:13]  But we moved here for what?
[01:58:14]  To pay your taxes?
[01:58:16]  You will live here.
[01:58:17]  I'm the only one.
[01:58:19]  I'm the only one.
[01:58:20]  Bitch.
[01:58:20]  That's why I'm saying so bad.
[01:58:22]  Nobody wants you.
[01:58:23]  I would love to beat y'all there once.
[01:58:25]  Hey, let's go back, dog.
[01:58:26]  You know what I mean?
[01:58:27]  Just come back to daddy, bro.
[01:58:28]  Hey, hey, hey, you want to be a dude's wife.
[01:58:31]  You want your little freedom?
[01:58:32]  You come.
[01:58:33]  Come on, Texas.
[01:58:33]  We're our own country.
[01:58:34]  Do it, bitch.
[01:58:36]  I'm tired of Texas talking.
[01:58:37]  Oh, we're our own country.
[01:58:38]  Do it.
[01:58:38]  Do it.
[01:58:39]  Joe Roman.
[01:58:39]  You can't even keep an electric grid.
[01:58:41]  You pay your electricity.
[01:58:43]  You need electricity from us.
[01:58:44]  It's cold.
[01:58:46]  Oh, it's so cold.
[01:58:47]  My windows are frosted.
[01:58:49]  Fix your shit.
[01:58:50]  Ask Elon Musk.
[01:58:51]  That's another daddy, your foreign-ass daddy.
[01:58:56]  Yeah, he is.
[01:58:57]  That little juice.
[01:59:00]  That electric grid never going down, right?
[01:59:02]  No, you got it.
[01:59:04]  No, no, no.
[01:59:05]  What were we just saying?
[01:59:06]  The mask thing.
[01:59:07]  Oh, yeah.
[01:59:07]  This is in the last, you'll be, in the last couple of weeks with the Omicron shit, it started to turn up.
[01:59:11]  But, like, New York probably was over it, I would say, two weeks ago.
[01:59:14]  Okay.
[01:59:15]  Like, and for a few months, even before that, yeah.
[01:59:17]  They always do the vaccine, the cards, but like on the streets, you want to see people with masks.
[01:59:21]  If you go to Florida, that's Liverpool.
[01:59:22]  Yo, son, Florida is the craziest thing the other night was: we were in.
[01:59:26]  Uh, we've like me, Mrs. has booked a lot of this trip up, she's been great.
[01:59:29]  Yeah, we're essentially here for my birthday at 10:30 tomorrow.
[01:59:33]  So, happy birthday when this is out.
[01:59:35]  You'll be 30 years old.
[01:59:36]  Happy birthday, she uh, she's booked all the stuff, and a lot of the places we've gone to have been like um prohibition bars, like speakeasies, yeah, and being in a speakeasy, which is supposed to be like when they're like, Could you put your mask on?
[01:59:51]  Sort of ruining the theme you're trying to put on here, like checking that I've got the cards again.
[01:59:56]  That's hilarious because all them speakeasies are really fake, yeah.
[01:59:59]  It's like they're like playing into it.
[02:00:01]  It got real cool.
[02:00:02]  Do you remember this?
[02:00:02]  Maybe like five years ago, like the idea of a speakeasy became like really cool.
[02:00:06]  But if you're doing business in New York City, like you're paying with a card, right?
[02:00:10]  Yeah, you can't pay with a credit card in a legal establishment.
[02:00:12]  Yeah, you know, when was the last time you heard a legal poker poker ring, and like you were just using your credit card to pay for it, it's on Google Maps, exactly because hours of operation, but yeah, you can get an Uber to the door when you pause.
[02:00:29]  All right, all right, Mark.
[02:00:29]  What was it?
[02:00:30]  What was the next one?
[02:00:30]  All right, Antonio Brown.
[02:00:31]  Is that the best way to quit a job of all time?
[02:00:34]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:00:38]  Do you know about Antonio Brown?
[02:00:40]  I know the history of it.
[02:00:41]  I know he's just been released to get released.
[02:00:45]  He quit to get released.
[02:00:46]  He just walked off the field.
[02:00:47]  Like, he took off his shirt off, his pants, everything, shirtless, ran off the field celebrating.
[02:00:52]  And he said his coach is trying to make him play injured.
[02:00:54]  So he was like, I can't play.
[02:00:56]  I'm injured.
[02:00:56]  And the coach said, You're off the team.
[02:00:57]  And he said, fuck it.
[02:00:58]  I'm out.
[02:00:58]  Yeah.
[02:00:59]  And now it's getting like, it's getting interesting because he fucked his porn star allegedly the night before.
[02:01:04]  And she's saying that he had COVID and or they gave her COVID.
[02:01:08]  And it's just he faked a vaccine card already.
[02:01:13]  Yeah.
[02:01:13]  So it just a wild boy.
[02:01:14]  Yeah.
[02:01:15]  Just walking off the field is kind of interesting.
[02:01:16]  And he had like a million dollars in bonuses that he could have very easily gotten.
[02:01:20]  So there's like a lot of things that are going on.
[02:01:21]  So he's left that money on the table.
[02:01:23]  Yeah.
[02:01:24]  Okay.
[02:01:24]  And everybody's kind of blaming like mental health.
[02:01:27]  Like you hear this a lot.
[02:01:28]  Like, oh, he's got concussions, blah, blah, blah.
[02:01:29]  Even the girl, like the porn star, was like, yeah, he was like mumbling.
[02:01:33]  He wasn't even coherent.
[02:01:34]  And it's just like, okay, did you rape this fucking guy?
[02:01:38]  Like, what's going on?
[02:01:39]  That's good.
[02:01:40]  Yeah.
[02:01:40]  So, I don't know.
[02:01:42]  It's just so interesting.
[02:01:43]  Everybody's going with this mental health thing.
[02:01:44]  Like, why all of a sudden do we care so much about his mental health?
[02:01:47]  I think we've all been a little concerned for a while because it's just like, yo, this guy's gone.
[02:01:51]  Like, remember when he called the cops in Hollywood, Florida?
[02:01:54]  Shouts?
[02:01:54]  That's where I used to live.
[02:01:55]  And he was just like blaming this girl, throwing her shit out, whatever it was.
[02:01:59]  He was been wilding, dude.
[02:02:00]  Apparently, he had a shit.
[02:02:01]  He just met people that were like, he would have cook for him as private chefs and never pay them and like try to intimidate them out of paying him.
[02:02:07]  It's like a lot of crazy stories around him.
[02:02:10]  Yeah.
[02:02:11]  So I think we're just trying to find an explanation.
[02:02:13]  And he wasn't when he came into the league, he was like a fifth, six-round pick.
[02:02:16]  He wasn't this guy.
[02:02:18]  And it seemed like he was really good.
[02:02:20]  And then all of a sudden, since that hit, at least that's what we were thinking.
[02:02:23]  It just felt like everything switched.
[02:02:25]  Who was coaching him back then?
[02:02:26]  Mike Tomlins, who was revered by his players.
[02:02:29]  Yeah.
[02:02:29]  People love playing Roman.
[02:02:30]  So maybe instead of mental health, we need to start giving Mike Tomlinson some credit.
[02:02:33]  They kept him in check.
[02:02:34]  Yeah, like maybe he found a way to kept him to keep him in safe.
[02:02:37]  Well, you got to be a problem.
[02:02:37]  I'm thinking he was always this guy.
[02:02:39]  And that was the one coach who could be like, I don't know.
[02:02:43]  I just don't buy this whole thing.
[02:02:44]  Like, I got one concussion.
[02:02:45]  Like, he was going over the middle.
[02:02:46]  This is what they say in football.
[02:02:47]  It's like there's a route that the wide receivers run where they have to cross the middle.
[02:02:53]  And then they're basically right in the way of a safety.
[02:02:55]  You can blind side clip him, et cetera.
[02:02:57]  And he got ripped by this guy that played for the bank.
[02:02:59]  Bronte's perfect.
[02:03:00]  Perfect.
[02:03:00]  Yeah.
[02:03:01]  And he got a concussion.
[02:03:02]  And people are saying after that, all these things are going wrong.
[02:03:04]  And it's like, these guys get so many concussions, dude.
[02:03:06]  Yeah.
[02:03:07]  Where are the other guys that are doing this exact same thing?
[02:03:09]  Yeah.
[02:03:09]  Yeah.
[02:03:09]  Like, you hear about it after their career is over, you know, like what's his face blowing his head off.
[02:03:13]  Yeah.
[02:03:14]  I don't know.
[02:03:15]  I don't buy that.
[02:03:15]  There's one hip that's just going to make him a rapper.
[02:03:18]  I need to hear his old interviews because if you hear him talking on the podcast recently, he barely put a sentence together.
[02:03:25]  It's like it seems like something's off up there.
[02:03:28]  So if this was always the case, then listen to his old interviews and you'll be able to see the difference.
[02:03:32]  Yeah.
[02:03:32]  And if that's the case, then don't even let him play.
[02:03:35]  No, I mean, if he could still produce, he could produce.
[02:03:37]  At the end of the day, yeah, these guys, all they want to do is win.
[02:03:40]  They don't care who you are.
[02:03:41]  They don't care what you've done.
[02:03:42]  Can you play football?
[02:03:43]  Can you help us win?
[02:03:44]  Come through.
[02:03:44]  And I wonder, is it like that with like soccer and shit?
[02:03:47]  With like, it doesn't matter what the guy did.
[02:03:50]  Well, like, as long as they're good.
[02:03:52]  If they're good, then all is forgiven.
[02:03:54]  Because these football players are beating their wives and shit, like running people over.
[02:03:59]  So there's little bits of that.
[02:04:01]  And it's like the lawyers these guys have, and they're not owned in the same way that the league is over here.
[02:04:07]  So it's a lot more individual.
[02:04:08]  But like Cristiano Ronaldo raped somebody, allegedly.
[02:04:15]  Like there's transcripts of him going, yeah, she asked me to stop.
[02:04:19]  And I said no, and I carried on.
[02:04:21]  And he paid her off.
[02:04:22]  But then she's come back and been like, I don't feel like I got enough.
[02:04:25]  Me life's been ruined.
[02:04:26]  This, that, and the other.
[02:04:27]  He's still playing football for Man United.
[02:04:29]  And Man United fans, when they signed him back in the summer, were like, oh, gods, come home.
[02:04:33]  This is we've got our guy back.
[02:04:35]  Like they don't.
[02:04:36]  And if you bring it up with them, they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, he's the leading scorer of all time.
[02:04:40]  Really?
[02:04:41]  Like, they know.
[02:04:42]  They've seen the same stuff I've seen.
[02:04:44]  And I'm a bitter Liverpool fan.
[02:04:46]  So like we hate them.
[02:04:47]  But would you allow him to be on your team?
[02:04:50]  Ronaldo?
[02:04:50]  Yeah.
[02:04:51]  No.
[02:04:52]  Based on ability alone.
[02:04:53]  Like at the minute, he wouldn't get into Liverpool's team.
[02:04:55]  But I know I'd be very uncomfortable with like he did it.
[02:04:59]  You know that for a fact.
[02:05:00]  Based on his own words that I've seen.
[02:05:03]  Yeah.
[02:05:04]  He did it.
[02:05:04]  And that, like, just like the you think some section of fans are just happy he's not gay.
[02:05:15]  It was a woman.
[02:05:16]  Great.
[02:05:17]  Play on.
[02:05:19]  Some of them are fucking movies.
[02:05:20]  They're probably going to be a little bit more.
[02:05:20]  Give him the number seven shit back.
[02:05:22]  It's not gay.
[02:05:23]  It's fine.
[02:05:23]  Yeah.
[02:05:24]  It's it's yeah.
[02:05:26]  But if you can get him for the cheap, you really wouldn't have him on your team.
[02:05:29]  Like if you get him real cheap.
[02:05:30]  So it's it's hard for me to be morally superior on this because we used to have a player at Liverpool called Louis Suarez who went on to play at last corner.
[02:05:38]  Yeah.
[02:05:39]  And he got in trouble for racism.
[02:05:41]  And including me at the time, everyone was like, was he really racist, though?
[02:05:46]  What did he do?
[02:05:46]  So he was playing against Manchester United.
[02:05:48]  I remember this.
[02:05:49]  And he had a real like tussle all game with Patrice Everett, who was their left back at the time.
[02:05:55]  And apparently he kept calling him Negrito.
[02:05:58]  Yeah.
[02:05:58]  Now there's an odd guy.
[02:06:04]  Yeah, this could be a cultural thing.
[02:06:06]  Where's he from?
[02:06:07]  Yeah, he's from Uruguay.
[02:06:08]  So yeah, this is they would call a tan white dude that totally.
[02:06:16]  And like since then, there's a Manchester United player called Cavani who congratulated a fellow player, like happy birthday, Negrito.
[02:06:23]  And everyone's like, but that's what Suarez got in trouble for.
[02:06:25]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:06:26]  And that's why Liverpool fans at the time are like, it's a cultural thing.
[02:06:28]  That's what they call people over there.
[02:06:30]  But it then came out that he was pinching his skin and going, Negrito, Negrito, during the game.
[02:06:36]  And there's no footage of that, but that was the accusation.
[02:06:39]  But what is the pinching about?
[02:06:40]  That's weird.
[02:06:41]  You are a Negrito.
[02:06:42]  Oh, like, this is the colour that grabs.
[02:06:46]  Yeah, that's a little bit tricky.
[02:06:47]  There is a word that's like in Spanish you can't say.
[02:06:50]  Yeah.
[02:06:50]  It's basically the Spanish version of the N-word.
[02:06:51]  And I think one of those coaches said it, oh, God, it was like the French coach or something like that.
[02:06:55]  And then I think he got removed.
[02:06:57]  Yeah.
[02:06:57]  Never.
[02:06:58]  Yeah, Oh, I don't know.
[02:07:02]  But Louis Suarez was so good.
[02:07:03]  Liverpool fans were just like.
[02:07:04]  Just too la la la la Just ignore it.
[02:07:09]  And Liverpool went really bad with it.
[02:07:10]  They had like the whole team wearing like support Louis t-shirts on during the warm-up because like the argument was oh Louis wasn't doing anything wrong, he was just you know using his cultural background, he was just arguing with the player, he's doing whatever it takes to win.
[02:07:24]  But there's like black Liverpool players wearing those t-shirts like support Louis in the warm-up.
[02:07:29]  And they've since come out afterwards and said like they made us that made me really uncomfortable having to wear that, but I was sort of told to do it by the club.
[02:07:36]  And then since then, the club have written an apology to Patrice Everett and said, We handled that really badly.
[02:07:41]  We should have never done that and apologized to him personally.
[02:07:44]  Wow.
[02:07:45]  How do the fans feel about that?
[02:07:46]  Liverpool fans at the time were sort of like, oh, he's he plays for us.
[02:07:50]  And you don't, no one understands what was going on apart from him and Patrice.
[02:07:53]  So we'll never know what get to the bottom of it.
[02:07:55]  And now everyone's a bit like, yeah, he left us a few years ago and we probably shouldn't.
[02:07:59]  We can be honest now.
[02:08:00]  Yeah.
[02:08:01]  Yeah, we can be honest.
[02:08:02]  Like, he doesn't play for us anymore.
[02:08:03]  So he's a racist piece of shit.
[02:08:04]  Right.
[02:08:05]  Yeah, I don't know if it's that bad, though.
[02:08:06]  I'll be honest.
[02:08:07]  Because if you hoop like there, and there's the white dude on the team, like, I got the white boy.
[02:08:11]  All right, white boy.
[02:08:12]  Let's see what you got.
[02:08:12]  White.
[02:08:13]  Yeah, I don't know if it's that bad.
[02:08:14]  But that's still said kind of endearing.
[02:08:17]  Say what?
[02:08:17]  It's still like an endearing way when we're saying that.
[02:08:20]  Yeah.
[02:08:20]  And I got scene and calling him nice.
[02:08:23]  Yeah, I guess.
[02:08:24]  If you're bad, they're not going to be racist.
[02:08:26]  If you're nice, you're going to be like, ah, white boy is nice.
[02:08:29]  Nah, if you're bad, we're still going to be.
[02:08:30]  I got to see that.
[02:08:32]  Yes.
[02:08:34]  Trash as wiping off the field.
[02:08:41]  We were playing pickup and we had to get it was like odd numbers.
[02:08:44]  We had to get like this goofy white kid on the team.
[02:08:46]  And then my homie L Jeffrey beat the other team goes, Yes, yes, with the sorry kid.
[02:08:53]  That's right in his face.
[02:09:02]  What else we got, Mark?
[02:09:03]  Before we really get into it, do you want to say R.I.P. Bob Sager real quick?
[02:09:06]  Oh, yeah, R.I.P. Bob Sagitt, man.
[02:09:08]  Did you ever have an interaction with him?
[02:09:10]  I did not.
[02:09:10]  Never once.
[02:09:12]  I literally feel like the only comedian right now.
[02:09:14]  Nah, me.
[02:09:15]  Motherfucker hated me.
[02:09:17]  I'm going through Instagram today and I'm like, God damn, bro.
[02:09:20]  Did this guy DM everybody, bro?
[02:09:22]  Everybody but me had an interaction with Bob Sagitt.
[02:09:25]  I got a message from him.
[02:09:26]  I got a message from him a couple of weeks ago.
[02:09:28]  Fuck you.
[02:09:29]  What was it saying?
[02:09:30]  He just said, hi, love Liverpool, love the UK.
[02:09:33]  Get out of here.
[02:09:34]  Yeah, I'm lying.
[02:09:36]  I was about to turn this goddamn podcast off.
[02:09:38]  It's like shitting all over Bob Sagitt.
[02:09:41]  That was the truth.
[02:09:42]  Didn't it feel that way when y'all were scrolling?
[02:09:43]  He's apparently.
[02:09:45]  Everybody had a picture with him.
[02:09:46]  If you met him, he was the nicest dude.
[02:09:47]  Nathan McIntosh said he opened for him, and Bob said thank you to him multiple times for opening for him.
[02:09:52]  Wow.
[02:09:52]  And then Nate asked him a piece of advice he didn't have an answer for him and then DM'd him later.
[02:09:55]  Like, oh, hey, here, something like that.
[02:09:57]  Like, went out of his way to be helpful.
[02:09:59]  Yeah.
[02:09:59]  If you met him, I heard he was the nicest guy, but I doubt he was reaching out to a ton of people just off the strength.
[02:10:04]  Yeah.
[02:10:04]  He's a 65-year-old man.
[02:10:06]  He ain't keeping up with us.
[02:10:07]  Yeah.
[02:10:07]  I mean, plugging in his AirPods and listening to Flagrant 2.
[02:10:12]  Damian Lemon had a funny joke where he would say, shout out to Damian Lemon, but he was like, Show me love like a dead rapper.
[02:10:18]  Yeah.

=== Bob Saget And Royally Screwed (08:45) ===

[02:10:19]  And this is that same type of love.
[02:10:21]  Yeah.
[02:10:22]  It's a real shame that you get that love after you're dead because I'm sure he would love to feel how he impacted all these people's lives, especially comics, man.
[02:10:28]  Yeah.
[02:10:29]  Like there are comics distraught about this shit.
[02:10:31]  Yeah.
[02:10:32]  I didn't realize how significant he was.
[02:10:35]  Me neither.
[02:10:36]  Like I needed to be on.
[02:10:37]  But I think this does that does happen when someone dies who's done a lot and has sort of maybe been forgotten by a lot of the mainstream and stuff.
[02:10:46]  Like, especially in the past few years.
[02:10:48]  Right.
[02:10:49]  I think people remember how much they love someone when they're gone.
[02:10:53]  Yeah, of course.
[02:10:54]  I don't think all these comics last week were like, do you know who my favorite comic is?
[02:10:57]  It's Bob Sagitt.
[02:10:58]  I don't think that was happening.
[02:10:59]  But when someone goes, people remember every episode of every show he was in.
[02:11:04]  Yeah.
[02:11:04]  Every movie, everything he's done, every joke they loved of his is right back in their brain.
[02:11:09]  Except Margaret Thatcher.
[02:11:11]  Yes.
[02:11:11]  That's the only person.
[02:11:12]  Maggie, Maggie, Maggie.
[02:11:14]  Dead, dead, dead.
[02:11:18]  That's why I'm cliping that.
[02:11:21]  That's why we need to fake your death.
[02:11:23]  Yo.
[02:11:24]  Yep.
[02:11:24]  That's the only way.
[02:11:25]  Is that legal?
[02:11:27]  Doesn't matter if it's legal.
[02:11:28]  Dangerous, though, you know.
[02:11:29]  What if they don't catch you?
[02:11:30]  Nazia Velli.
[02:11:31]  What if you do it?
[02:11:32]  And everyone's like, who?
[02:11:35]  And then you've got to live in that world.
[02:11:36]  I'm scrolling Facebook, LC.
[02:11:38]  Nobody changed their fucking profile bitch.
[02:11:40]  I'm like, bird?
[02:11:41]  That's suck.
[02:11:43]  No, that's crazy.
[02:11:44]  Fake your death for like a week.
[02:11:45]  And before the week, you're like really nice to everyone, like DM a lot of people.
[02:11:48]  Yeah.
[02:11:49]  Everyone's going to post about you and then come back from death.
[02:11:52]  Mark is trying to get a week off.
[02:11:54]  I like that.
[02:11:54]  I like that.
[02:11:56]  I didn't want it.
[02:11:58]  That's fly.
[02:11:59]  I like that.
[02:11:59]  All right.
[02:11:59]  Philly's no facts, man.
[02:12:01]  All right.
[02:12:01]  All right.
[02:12:01]  So Jared Fogel, famous Subway spokesperson.
[02:12:05]  Y'all got Subway in Liverpool.
[02:12:08]  I said, Natrain or Sandwich.
[02:12:12]  They call it Metro Sandwich.
[02:12:13]  Indians on him out there too.
[02:12:14]  Oh, word?
[02:12:15]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:12:15]  Oh, shit.
[02:12:16]  Everywhere you go.
[02:12:17]  Subway, the Subway Sandwich spokesperson, Jared Fogel.
[02:12:20]  He's the guy who lost all the weight.
[02:12:21]  Yeah.
[02:12:22]  You know what I'm talking about?
[02:12:24]  He was convicted of kids.
[02:12:25]  He was having four child porn videos in his possession and also pleaded guilty to child porn RF charge of paying for sex of an underage girl traveling from New York to Indiana that had to pay $1.4 million.
[02:12:34]  He recently released a statement from jail in which he says, I quote, royally screwed up.
[02:12:39]  I thought that was like a nod at like Prince Andrew.
[02:12:44]  I swear to God, I thought that he was speaking in coded language.
[02:12:47]  He was like, yo, if Ghelane talks about me, it's fucking off.
[02:12:50]  I'm switching on everybody.
[02:12:51]  I'm shooting off the clutch.
[02:12:53]  100%.
[02:12:54]  You think Ghelane's top target was Jared?
[02:12:56]  Bro, they got Jared, dog.
[02:12:58]  They got Jared.
[02:13:00]  How come he wasn't protected?
[02:13:00]  They got him years ago.
[02:13:01]  Because everybody got him.
[02:13:02]  That guy was sloppy.
[02:13:04]  He was sending the girls to his crib.
[02:13:05]  He wasn't going to the island.
[02:13:07]  I royally screwed up is so funny.
[02:13:09]  Yeah.
[02:13:10]  It was a mistake.
[02:13:11]  Just like we talk about.
[02:13:13]  I am royally screwed up, maybe.
[02:13:14]  I think he's missing a key word.
[02:13:16]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:13:17]  He's acting like he's not flawed as a human being.
[02:13:20]  Hey, yeah.
[02:13:21]  I royally screwed up is like, you forgot your wife's birthday.
[02:13:24]  Yeah.
[02:13:24]  You know what I mean?
[02:13:25]  He didn't forget those girls' birthdays.
[02:13:30]  Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase, eat fresh, doesn't it?
[02:13:37]  Like, really fresh.
[02:13:39]  The craziest part from his letter is that he says, I'm in the best shape I've ever been in in my life.
[02:13:46]  He says, in prison, I run five to six miles a day.
[02:13:49]  I've never been so, I've never felt so good physically or mentally.
[02:13:53]  Wow.
[02:13:54]  Who's interviewing him?
[02:13:55]  Who's asking how Jared is?
[02:13:56]  He wrote a letter.
[02:13:57]  To whom?
[02:13:58]  I don't know.
[02:13:59]  Glenn?
[02:14:00]  I don't know.
[02:14:01]  I think he's involved in that shit, low-key.
[02:14:04]  I'm being dead serious.
[02:14:05]  You think that's as low as they went when they were inviting people into this book?
[02:14:08]  Can I be honest with you, bro?
[02:14:10]  I don't think they got dirt on nobody.
[02:14:12]  What?
[02:14:12]  I think they got like some cornball scientists.
[02:14:14]  I don't think they actually got like the big wigs.
[02:14:17]  I think they're too slick.
[02:14:18]  You really think Bill Clinton is going to go fuck 14-year-olds with no security guards around or no?
[02:14:23]  No.
[02:14:23]  He knows the game.
[02:14:25]  He's been president.
[02:14:26]  He's got a lot of fucking overall office.
[02:14:27]  That's his moon.
[02:14:28]  Son, he was like, he hired her.
[02:14:30]  That's sloppy.
[02:14:31]  And he got head.
[02:14:31]  There's people.
[02:14:32]  He came on a dress and then just was like, hey, I'll see you later.
[02:14:35]  Bro, the dude wouldn't even fuck.
[02:14:37]  That's discipline.
[02:14:38]  Think about that.
[02:14:39]  You think he's going to make this mistake?
[02:14:40]  He's just going to go to this island, not trust this person.
[02:14:42]  That's presidential.
[02:14:43]  Yes.
[02:14:43]  How do you talk to him?
[02:14:45]  I think you're vastly.
[02:14:46]  I'm going to deprive myself.
[02:14:47]  I'm just getting head.
[02:14:49]  Yeah, I'm just getting ahead.
[02:14:50]  You think he wanted to finish?
[02:14:52]  I think he did.
[02:14:54]  Say what?
[02:14:54]  I think he did.
[02:14:55]  No, but you didn't think he wanted to actually fuck.
[02:14:57]  Of course he's going to want to fuck.
[02:14:59]  Nah.
[02:15:00]  Or he got them rape charges.
[02:15:02]  He got that rape charge and he's like, I don't want to get caught up with that shit again.
[02:15:09]  Interesting.
[02:15:10]  I didn't know about that.
[02:15:11]  Okay.
[02:15:12]  Anyway, what were you saying?
[02:15:14]  I think you say he knows the game.
[02:15:15]  I think when you get to that level, that becomes the game.
[02:15:20]  I've got, I do a bit at the minute about people always want what they can't have, and that's why billionaires fuck kids.
[02:15:26]  Right.
[02:15:26]  Because they can have anything else.
[02:15:27]  It's like the last thing.
[02:15:28]  Yeah.
[02:15:29]  Like everyone wants a vice.
[02:15:31]  Yeah.
[02:15:32]  And nothing's a vice when you're a billionaire because you can drink as much as you want.
[02:15:35]  You can solve it with whatever, the best medical care in the world.
[02:15:37]  Yeah.
[02:15:38]  Every woman will fuck you because if you pay them enough, anyone will do anything.
[02:15:41]  Yeah.
[02:15:41]  But it's still wrong to fuck kids.
[02:15:43]  So that's why they do it.
[02:15:44]  Yeah.
[02:15:45]  And I think that's what it is at that level.
[02:15:46]  He's the president.
[02:15:47]  He can have whatever he wants.
[02:15:48]  And it's like, come in this room.
[02:15:50]  This is the naughty thing.
[02:15:51]  And I think, and this is a bit Tim Foil Hattie, I suppose.
[02:15:55]  Yeah.
[02:15:55]  I think Epstein and Gillain were, they were hired to get dirt on people.
[02:15:59]  I think this guy's too powerful.
[02:16:01]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:16:02]  Get him to fuck this thing and take a picture of it.
[02:16:04]  And then we've got that forever.
[02:16:05]  And he'll do whatever we need him to do.
[02:16:07]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:16:08]  We're assuming that that's his job.
[02:16:09]  100%.
[02:16:11]  I think that if you're Bill Clinton or any of these other like high-profile, either politicians or businessmen, you know the game.
[02:16:18]  You know that there are people out here trying to get dirt on you because you, as a person in government, are like, yo, go get some dirt on that motherfucker.
[02:16:23]  Yeah.
[02:16:24]  You ran a campaign where you're trying to get dirt on people.
[02:16:26]  You know the game better than anyone else.
[02:16:28]  So I don't think you're getting caught up like, oh, this guy's so charismatic.
[02:16:31]  He's a banker.
[02:16:32]  Oh, okay.
[02:16:33]  I'll go to his island and there's kids there.
[02:16:34]  I'm not going to think anything about it.
[02:16:36]  But I know it's obvious what they're trying to do to you.
[02:16:39]  But I don't think it's on day one that they send Epstein in and go, Hi, Bill.
[02:16:44]  I'm Jeff.
[02:16:45]  And do you want to come fuck some kids?
[02:16:46]  Yeah.
[02:16:46]  I don't think it quite works like that.
[02:16:48]  I think they make him do it's incremental.
[02:16:50]  It's like, oh, have this.
[02:16:52]  Don't worry.
[02:16:52]  There's a bit of weed in it.
[02:16:53]  It's fine.
[02:16:54]  I do want some Coke.
[02:16:55]  No, I haven't.
[02:16:56]  It's fine.
[02:16:56]  It's just, it's edging, edging, edging, edging until, and they've constantly got little tiny bits of dirt on you there.
[02:17:02]  Yeah.
[02:17:02]  That he's like, oh, that wouldn't end my career.
[02:17:04]  That wouldn't end my career.
[02:17:05]  I could get away with saying I had a bit of weed.
[02:17:07]  Yeah.
[02:17:08]  I could get away.
[02:17:08]  And it's just up and up and up and up until it's the big one.
[02:17:11]  And then they get you through that.
[02:17:12]  Yeah.
[02:17:12]  Maybe.
[02:17:13]  I don't know.
[02:17:14]  I don't think they lead with the big thing.
[02:17:16]  Did he do it?
[02:17:17]  Did he fuck the kids before or after he was president?
[02:17:19]  I don't know.
[02:17:20]  Allegedly.
[02:17:21]  Yeah, allegedly.
[02:17:21]  I mean, I think his flight logs were when he was just the governor of Arkansas.
[02:17:25]  Oh, really?
[02:17:25]  So then there's no way.
[02:17:27]  But that's how the power.
[02:17:29]  How do you get the power?
[02:17:30]  So you're assuming by fucking the kids, he ends up in the pocket of these people who want to control him.
[02:17:35]  And those people who want to control him allow him to be president.
[02:17:38]  You can't get the power without being compromised.
[02:17:39]  That's fair.
[02:17:40]  So let's assume that that's the case.
[02:17:42]  Sure.
[02:17:42]  But if that's the case, he is in on the whole thing because this is someone who wants to be president of the United States of America.
[02:17:48]  If you want to be president of the United States of America, that's not something that you just fall into.
[02:17:52]  Your whole life is geared towards that moment.
[02:17:55]  So you're not going to go fuck some kid for fun on an island when you're like, yo, I'm about to be president in a few years.
[02:18:00]  Maybe you do that shit after you're president, but you're not going to throw it away for some fucking teen pussy.
[02:18:05]  There's no way unless they said, yo, you got to do this shit.
[02:18:08]  And if you do this, we got your back.
[02:18:10]  And then now this is part of a way bigger thing.
[02:18:12]  Yeah.
[02:18:12]  But I just don't, I cannot believe that somebody that's so fucking disciplined and about that life and has literally curated their entire existence for one job and sees it is going to throw it away for a 15-year-old.
[02:18:25]  Is it a power-obsessed person?
[02:18:27]  Someone that's obsessed with power and sex is the ultimate manifestation of power.
[02:18:31]  Is it though?
[02:18:32]  I mean, kind of.
[02:18:33]  I don't think so.
[02:18:34]  A lot of people who got no power get pussy.
[02:18:36]  Yeah, but getting someone to have sex with you is a display of power.
[02:18:40]  But I don't know.
[02:18:41]  If it is that one as well, where they're like, if you do this, we'll help you get to president.
[02:18:45]  Imagine how Hillary feels when she sucked a 12-year-old dick for nothing.
[02:18:54]  So fucking true.
[02:18:56]  How you get dirt on Hillary?
[02:19:00]  Yeah, I don't know.
[02:19:01]  Where's that 12-year-old now, though?
[02:19:02]  Yeah.

=== White Women Dating Black Men (07:52) ===

[02:19:04]  Fucking Jim Jones was really part of Jim Jones' mom about to run for mayor, bro.
[02:19:09]  Watch out.
[02:19:10]  Watch the fuck out.
[02:19:11]  They got enough dirt on her to put her in office.
[02:19:14]  All right, but yeah.
[02:19:15]  So, Jared, we're done with it.
[02:19:17]  Yep.
[02:19:17]  So, basically, Fresh with Fit Guys is a podcast called Fresh and Fit.
[02:19:20]  On the podcast, they said that they're not into dating black women.
[02:19:24]  Two black dudes.
[02:19:25]  One of the dudes said it, right?
[02:19:26]  Or do they both die?
[02:19:27]  No, they both.
[02:19:28]  They both said it.
[02:19:28]  Yeah.
[02:19:30]  So.
[02:19:30]  And basically, it started a lot of controversy.
[02:19:32]  Like, Shade Room posted it.
[02:19:33]  A bunch of other, like, specifically black Instagram pages posted it.
[02:19:37]  Yeah.
[02:19:38]  Basically trying to cancel them more or less.
[02:19:40]  Now, Alex, as a black man that doesn't date black women, what is your opinion?
[02:19:45]  So as a black and Spanish man, who has dated black women in the past?
[02:19:48]  That we've just never met.
[02:19:50]  What do you mean?
[02:19:51]  I've been in a relationship.
[02:19:52]  But yeah, I think that's super corny of them to do that.
[02:19:56]  But at the same time, I can understand having a type.
[02:19:58]  Ooh, go.
[02:19:59]  So it's like, if you have a type and it sucks that race is part of that type.
[02:20:04]  But it's like, hey, you like what you like.
[02:20:06]  But that's different than what was said.
[02:20:08]  What was said was, I don't date black women.
[02:20:09]  It wasn't I have a type.
[02:20:10]  Well, they didn't.
[02:20:11]  Because I have a not type.
[02:20:12]  No, no, they have a, they started to say, like, you're allowed to have types.
[02:20:16]  And like, they're having a conversation about like, why are women allowed to have standards, but they're not allowed to have standards.
[02:20:21]  And they said that they're not against it.
[02:20:23]  They just don't necessarily do it.
[02:20:25]  Now, I'm not trying to cap for them, but like, that's what it seemed like.
[02:20:28]  Now, what's interesting to me is what dictates your type.
[02:20:33]  You know what I mean?
[02:20:33]  Like, there's a reason why Indian people like Indian food.
[02:20:35]  Mexicans like Mexican food, right?
[02:20:36]  Exactly.
[02:20:37]  It's what you grew up with, what you know.
[02:20:38]  So what's happening to them?
[02:20:40]  Yeah.
[02:20:40]  That they're not attracted to the people that look like them.
[02:20:43]  Is that some shit you're seeing on TV?
[02:20:45]  Is that some shit that is existing in your life?
[02:20:48]  You know, are there like parental figures that are saying that this isn't the ideal form of beauty?
[02:20:52]  Something else is?
[02:20:53]  You ever see point to the media?
[02:20:55]  You could go media.
[02:20:57]  You ever see the black guys that fuck white girls, but it's really black girls don't fuck them?
[02:21:03]  Interesting.
[02:21:04]  I think some of that.
[02:21:06]  Sometimes we just, what is it?
[02:21:07]  We eat what we can hunt.
[02:21:08]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:21:09]  Patrice said, yeah.
[02:21:10]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:21:11]  But what was his shit like?
[02:21:12]  To think about how he knows how to hit on a black girl.
[02:21:14]  He doesn't know how to hit on a white girl.
[02:21:16]  He said, right.
[02:21:17]  So he dates black girls because he knows.
[02:21:19]  And it's like, it might be easier for them to date white girls.
[02:21:22]  Yeah.
[02:21:22]  And that really might be what it is.
[02:21:24]  You want to hear what they said specifically?
[02:21:25]  Yeah, go, go, play it.
[02:21:26]  What about the black dating app called Black?
[02:21:29]  It's funny I never used that one, bro.
[02:21:31]  But hey, man.
[02:21:32]  I mean, hey, bro, if you want to date a bunch of Shaniquas, go for it, man.
[02:21:35]  Laquitia.
[02:21:36]  Yeah.
[02:21:36]  Like, me and Fresh aren't really down with the brown like that.
[02:21:39]  We ain't night writers.
[02:21:40]  So I'm good.
[02:21:41]  You know, sometimes if they're, you know, red bone, but like in general, me and Fresh don't dabble in the dark, if you know what I'm saying.
[02:21:47]  Yep.
[02:21:47]  Okay.
[02:21:48]  So last one, guys.
[02:21:51]  That stinks to me.
[02:21:53]  That's corny.
[02:21:54]  I've tried a lot and being told to fuck off a lot.
[02:21:58]  Because they're projecting the image of alphas, aren't they?
[02:22:02]  I've seen a few of their clips.
[02:22:03]  They're like, we're the alpha guys.
[02:22:05]  I'm in charge.
[02:22:05]  I do this.
[02:22:06]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:22:06]  And if anyone's ever taken that away from you, you would shun that.
[02:22:10]  Because it would fracture your whole ego and identity.
[02:22:14]  I don't like fucking black women.
[02:22:15]  What?
[02:22:15]  The ones who don't want to fuck you anyway?
[02:22:17]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:22:17]  Irrelevant.
[02:22:18]  I didn't want to.
[02:22:21]  All these ones who are willing to listen to me.
[02:22:23]  You know what?
[02:22:24]  That's a really interesting point.
[02:22:25]  You're going to gravitate to the people that make you feel how you want to feel about yourself.
[02:22:30]  Or that confirm what you already do feel about yourself.
[02:22:32]  Exactly.
[02:22:32]  And like a white girl ain't going to look at you and be like, you ain't shit.
[02:22:35]  Yeah.
[02:22:36]  A black woman with white.
[02:22:37]  Yeah.
[02:22:38]  They don't know the difference between a corny black guy and an actual alpha black dude.
[02:22:41]  It's all for that.
[02:22:43]  I just thought it was corny to say it publicly.
[02:22:45]  Just do it privately, like Alex.
[02:22:46]  You know what I mean?
[02:22:48]  Just privately don't do it.
[02:22:50]  Don't do that bullshit.
[02:22:51]  But also, it seems like a cloud chase.
[02:22:53]  Like, they're good at generating headlines.
[02:22:55]  Yeah.
[02:22:55]  And to a degree, we're giving them more, but it's just, it was just corny to me.
[02:22:59]  Yeah.
[02:22:59]  Like, you also will bring every black girl on your podcast and then use headlines for the exact girls you're saying you won't fuck.
[02:23:05]  Right.
[02:23:06]  Like you'll use them to get you headlines and views and clicks.
[02:23:08]  But then when it comes to actually dating them, you won't do it.
[02:23:10]  It just felt whack on every level.
[02:23:12]  Yeah, I've never had a standard like that.
[02:23:14]  That's weird, though.
[02:23:16]  I've never had like a racial standard per se.
[02:23:19]  I have.
[02:23:20]  I do.
[02:23:21]  Yeah.
[02:23:22]  Yeah.
[02:23:22]  I don't know.
[02:23:23]  You just wouldn't date white women.
[02:23:24]  No, I wouldn't date white women.
[02:23:25]  I wanted very much to marry an Indian woman for my own, like to pass on my own culture, my own traditions, all that.
[02:23:30]  And I also thought it was kind of whack.
[02:23:32]  And I used to be like, I grew up all around white girls in high school.
[02:23:35]  Those were the only hot girls I saw.
[02:23:37]  So I was into that.
[02:23:37]  And then when I went to college and met more Indian girls, I was like, okay, they're beautiful.
[02:23:42]  I can do this.
[02:23:42]  But it also just like.
[02:23:44]  You could do this.
[02:23:45]  Yeah, I could do this, son.
[02:23:46]  I didn't know it was a possibility.
[02:23:48]  Because all you ever saw growing up was Indians.
[02:23:50]  You would celebrate if you dated a white girl.
[02:23:51]  Like, I've had Indian guys tell me I would pass on a beautiful white girl for an Indian girl for an average white girl.
[02:23:57]  And that shit blew my mind.
[02:23:58]  And I was like, that's got to come from somewhere.
[02:24:00]  And that's got to stop, right?
[02:24:01]  Like, we can't keep doing that.
[02:24:02]  Yeah, where does that come from?
[02:24:03]  I think he just wants someone who spells thumb the same way he said.
[02:24:12]  Yo, that's interesting.
[02:24:15]  Where does that come from?
[02:24:16]  Sometimes you see people dating.
[02:24:18]  You see non-white people dating much uglier white girls than you believe that they could get within their own race.
[02:24:27]  Oh, I think if I was white, I would always date interracially because you always go up.
[02:24:32]  You always date up.
[02:24:33]  If I'm white, there's no way I'm dating.
[02:24:35]  I'm dating up.
[02:24:36]  Interesting.
[02:24:37]  Great-looking black dudes.
[02:24:38]  White girls, you're just like, really?
[02:24:41]  And what do you think that is?
[02:24:42]  And I see white girls or Indian dudes that are, you know, definitely rich.
[02:24:45]  Yeah.
[02:24:46]  But is that just some like internalized racism?
[02:24:48]  It's, I think we put them on a pedestal.
[02:24:51]  And that's part of also me joking around saying white women are, you know, ugly, whatever.
[02:24:55]  I'm less attracted to them generally, but also it's like, it's so fucking, all you hear about is this white girl so hot.
[02:25:02]  And this, like, they're celebrated a lot.
[02:25:04]  So I'm just kind of like contrarian with that.
[02:25:06]  Do you feel that as a white guy?
[02:25:08]  What?
[02:25:08]  That like white women's beauty is celebrated a lot?
[02:25:11]  No, but I'm white living in America.
[02:25:12]  Exactly.
[02:25:14]  I actually probably notice non-white women's beauty being celebrated far more.
[02:25:19]  Yeah.
[02:25:20]  That's because of the world you live in, though.
[02:25:21]  Yeah.
[02:25:21]  You're in the entertainment industry.
[02:25:23]  Yeah.
[02:25:23]  Like to a lay person.
[02:25:25]  No, every model on the every cover of everything.
[02:25:28]  But so Van Edzy is a white woman.
[02:25:29]  Yeah, it's like, I was talking about this.
[02:25:31]  Like, I think it was Rock was saying something like that about like he doesn't want black, he doesn't want black superiority to be celebrated.
[02:25:38]  He just wants black normalcy to be celebrated.
[02:25:41]  Like that's when their racism is gone, when you could just be like the black doctor, not the best ever doctor that happens to be black.
[02:25:47]  But yeah, maybe that's it.
[02:25:48]  I'm just not noticing like all these mannequins or whatever.
[02:25:50]  Not even mannequins.
[02:25:51]  I'm noticing like all these like random models that aren't even the top model.
[02:25:54]  Yeah.
[02:25:55]  Right.
[02:25:55]  I'm just every single other model is just some white girl.
[02:25:58]  I'm noticing the most famous, beautiful minority chick.
[02:26:02]  Yeah.
[02:26:03]  Interesting.
[02:26:04]  Yeah.
[02:26:04]  Yeah.
[02:26:05]  And brands will point to that as like, yo, this is our person.
[02:26:08]  This is our, the one that broke through.
[02:26:09]  And as a way to like diffuse the other issues within it.
[02:26:13]  Interesting.
[02:26:15]  So that's how you see it, Al?
[02:26:16]  Yeah.
[02:26:16]  It just looks like there's a bunch of models and they're all white.
[02:26:19]  And then the exceptions to the rule.
[02:26:20]  Exactly.
[02:26:21]  And I'm just picking up on the exceptions.
[02:26:23]  We don't even know the exceptions.
[02:26:24]  Like we know the Winnie Harlows and the ones I like.
[02:26:26]  She's both Tyra Banks and shit.
[02:26:28]  Yeah.
[02:26:29]  Yeah.
[02:26:30]  There's...
[02:26:31]  Yeah, okay, okay, okay, okay.
[02:26:32]  But it's like a status thing, I think.
[02:26:34]  So can you have a type?
[02:26:37]  Yeah.
[02:26:38]  But I think a big part of what you like is what you grew up around.
[02:26:43]  Yeah.
[02:26:43]  So it's like.
[02:26:44]  Having a type is one thing.
[02:26:45]  Saying I don't have a type and they're like this and it's based on the color of their skin, that's actually racist.
[02:26:52]  Yeah.
[02:26:52]  And it's sad when somebody's racist toward their own.
[02:26:54]  That's the saddest, most broken shit.

=== Welcome To Have A Word (06:07) ===

[02:26:56]  I think Adam might be on it, bro.
[02:26:57]  Yeah.
[02:26:58]  I think you might be on it.
[02:27:01]  Do you have a type, Adam?
[02:27:04]  Yeah, about five foot seven.
[02:27:08]  You hear me?
[02:27:11]  Adam's girl's ass.
[02:27:16]  No, not really.
[02:27:17]  Really?
[02:27:17]  I've only ever been with white girls, but I think that's probably more you're like the fresh and fit of this.
[02:27:24]  Yeah, I don't.
[02:27:25]  I don't, I feel like I'm so white.
[02:27:29]  Like I'm short, fat, and white.
[02:27:30]  Yeah.
[02:27:31]  And I feel like approaching the black girls that I would be attracted to, which would be really attractive black girls.
[02:27:37]  Yeah.
[02:27:37]  I think they'd look at me like, what the fuck is wrong?
[02:27:39]  Who put you up to this?
[02:27:46]  What's happening?
[02:27:46]  They'd be like, come on.
[02:27:50]  What TV show am I on?
[02:27:56]  You can't possibly think this conversation was going to go well.
[02:28:01]  Okay, let's wrap this up, boys.
[02:28:03]  Listen, Adam, thank you so much for being here.
[02:28:05]  Thanks for having me, Mason.
[02:28:06]  You're the fucking man.
[02:28:08]  Tell them where they can find you.
[02:28:09]  Tell them what's going on in your life.
[02:28:10]  Tell them about Have a Word pod.
[02:28:13]  Absolutely.
[02:28:14]  Twitter's Adam Rowe Comedy.
[02:28:15]  Instagram's Adam Rowe Comedian.
[02:28:17]  The podcast is called Have A Word.
[02:28:18]  That's on every podcast platform and on youtube.com slash have a word pod.
[02:28:22]  And I put a special out last year called Adam Rowe Club Comic, which if you just search that on YouTube, that'll come up.
[02:28:28]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:28:30]  It was good shit, man.
[02:28:30]  Now, who do we got to look out for out there in the UK besides you?
[02:28:34]  Give me a couple of couple guys that I should check out.
[02:28:37]  So Dan, my co-host, is one of the...
[02:28:40]  It's great to be podcasting with him because he's been doing comedy about 10 years longer than me and just never been given a break.
[02:28:45]  But he's that guy who every comic is like them.
[02:28:49]  Why aren't they big?
[02:28:50]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:28:51]  And when he fills, he's about to film his, he's about to do his first tour on the back of Have a Word.
[02:28:55]  Yeah.
[02:28:56]  And he's going to film a special and put it out.
[02:28:58]  So that'll be in about maybe nine months, something like that.
[02:29:00]  Dan, say his last name.
[02:29:01]  Dan Nightingale.
[02:29:02]  People know.
[02:29:02]  Dan Nightingale.
[02:29:04]  Is Dan has a podcast.
[02:29:07]  He's amazing.
[02:29:09]  It's a guy called Mark Nelson from Scotland.
[02:29:11]  Okay.
[02:29:11]  So he's based in Glasgow and he's just...
[02:29:13]  I support my Scottish peeps, bro.
[02:29:15]  He's so...
[02:29:16]  You know, you're talking about the accent and the punchlines.
[02:29:18]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:29:19]  Just when he drops punchlines, like I don't want to be doing his bits, but like the, he was like, he had to homeschool his kids.
[02:29:27]  And like, people are like, are you going to send them back?
[02:29:29]  Even though there's still COVID?
[02:29:30]  Yeah.
[02:29:30]  And he's like, even if their teacher is the monkey from Outbreak, they're going to like, he's just, like, his writing.
[02:29:38]  He's so funny.
[02:29:40]  Yeah.
[02:29:40]  And he deserves to be so much bigger than he is.
[02:29:42]  And he's about to drop a special as well.
[02:29:44]  Oh, good.
[02:29:45]  I work with him recently.
[02:29:46]  Yeah.
[02:29:46]  And to be honest with you, we have a guest on every episode of Have a Word.
[02:29:50]  So the first half, for the first hour, it's just me and Dan.
[02:29:53]  We break it up, bring the guest in.
[02:29:55]  Everyone we've had on, if you go through that list, there's someone we respect.
[02:29:58]  We don't bring people on for the sake of it.
[02:30:01]  It's just, it's someone where like, we want to get them on.
[02:30:04]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:30:05]  And if you want an episode to start with, there's an episode with a guy called Jamie Hutchinson.
[02:30:10]  And he is like, he won't even hate me.
[02:30:13]  He's a nobody.
[02:30:14]  He's quite new in comedy.
[02:30:15]  He's a few years in.
[02:30:16]  But he did a guest on another podcast.
[02:30:18]  And the guys who run it are made to man.
[02:30:20]  He was like, you just need to get him on.
[02:30:21]  Just trust me.
[02:30:21]  Just get him on.
[02:30:22]  And we're like, okay, great.
[02:30:23]  We know him.
[02:30:24]  He's a sound lad.
[02:30:25]  And he come on.
[02:30:26]  His life is so tragic.
[02:30:28]  And when you're me and Dan, it's very rare me and Dan sit back and just let the guests talk.
[02:30:33]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:30:33]  And we're just engrossed by it.
[02:30:35]  His life is pathetic.
[02:30:37]  And it's so funny.
[02:30:39]  Why is it pathetic?
[02:30:40]  He's just, he grew up in this family where like he lives in his nan's box room, even though his parents are still alive.
[02:30:48]  Like he was taken to gambling shops when he was like seven and taught how to pick the right horses by his dad.
[02:30:53]  He's got an autistic younger brother who every night beats him up, but as a character called Dr. Catford.
[02:31:01]  So he'll be.
[02:31:02]  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:31:03]  I saw this clip too.
[02:31:04]  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:31:05]  So he'll get a textual day, like, your appointment's at nine.
[02:31:08]  And he has to go home.
[02:31:10]  He puts like his mum's dressing gown on and he pretends to be a doctor.
[02:31:14]  He's like, we're losing him.
[02:31:15]  And he'll jump up and beat the shit out of us.
[02:31:18]  The whole episode is ridiculous.
[02:31:20]  And it's all stuff like that.
[02:31:22]  That's the one clip that we put out that went mad.
[02:31:25]  Like, probably the most views we ever had on a clip from the show.
[02:31:27]  But everything he spoke about in the episode.
[02:31:30]  Yeah.
[02:31:30]  Oh, he's.
[02:31:32]  He's actually right this second.
[02:31:33]  So occasionally on Have a Word on our Patreon page, we do we call it the lockdown lock-in from when we were in lockdowns.
[02:31:40]  Yeah.
[02:31:41]  And we just we just get drunk in the studio and put an extra episode out.
[02:31:44]  And because I'm away, they're doing a drunk episode with Dan, Jamie, and another guy called Eshan, who's one of our regular guests who our listeners love.
[02:31:53]  They're doing it right this second.
[02:31:54]  Like as we're recording here, they're in the studio back in Liverpool.
[02:31:57]  They're doing that.
[02:31:59]  And Jamie getting drunk and the stories that will come out out of that.
[02:32:02]  This is a story.
[02:32:03]  We did a live show in Liverpool at Christmas in front of an audience.
[02:32:08]  And he told the story where he's like, I was playing.
[02:32:12]  Do you ever play like management games like for a medical couple?
[02:32:16]  Yeah.
[02:32:16]  So he was playing Championship Manager, which is like the soccer where you're the manager.
[02:32:21]  And he's like, my mum was having sex in the next room.
[02:32:24]  She's like, fucked in the next room, man.
[02:32:26]  I'm playing the game.
[02:32:27]  He's like, and it was the FA Cup final.
[02:32:29]  I'm in the FA Cup final.
[02:32:30]  And we went 1-0 down.
[02:32:32]  And me and my mum moaned at the same time.
[02:32:40]  Oh, fuck.
[02:32:45]  Oh, boy.
[02:32:46]  Oh, that's great.
[02:32:47]  What's his kid's name?
[02:32:48]  Jamie Hutchinson.
[02:32:49]  Jamie Hutchinson.
[02:32:49]  He's such good value.
[02:32:51]  And it's a great episode to start with if you're going to check it out.
[02:32:53]  Well, brother, thank you so much for coming on.
[02:32:55]  Thank you, man.
[02:32:56]  We're definitely going to check out Have a Word.
[02:32:57]  And I'm glad you're in town, bro.
[02:32:59]  This is good shit.
[02:33:00]  This is good shit.
[02:33:01]  All right, guys.
[02:33:01]  This has been Flagrant 2.
[02:33:03]  Peace.