Flagrant - Andrew Schulz & Akaash Singh - Saturday Night Rive
Aired: 2019-09-17
Duration: 02:08:01


=== NBA 2K20 Sponsorship (02:40) ===

[00:00:10]  This episode is brought to you by Disappearing Smoke Bomber.
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[00:00:42]  What the fuck?
[00:00:43]  Guys, this is a new sketch that's going to be on SNL.
[00:00:50]  I'll be a fire snippets commercial.
[00:00:55]  Yo, what's up, everybody?
[00:00:57]  Welcome to Flagrant 2, No Easy Buckets, Analysis by Assholes, Water Cooler Commentary for Your Sports Needs.
[00:01:04]  I'm Andrew Schultz.
[00:01:06]  I'm here with my man Akash Singh, Real Life Kaz, Alex Media, Ed and Martinez on the ones and twos.
[00:01:12]  This episode has been brought to you, guys.
[00:01:15]  It's been brought to you by Adam and Eve, adamandeve.com, your one-stop shop for all your fuck products.
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[00:01:50]  Now, this episode is also brought to you by NBA 2K20.
[00:01:55]  Okay.
[00:01:55]  This isn't a game, Kaz.
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[00:02:20]  You could play against Kaz.
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[00:02:22]  At RealLife Kaz1.
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[00:02:25]  Okay?
[00:02:25]  Don't trust that at RealLife Kaz.
[00:02:27]  That's not Kaz.
[00:02:28]  At RealLife Kaz1.
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[00:02:30]  Ronnie 2K, my second favorite Indian.
[00:02:32]  Shouts to Ronnie.
[00:02:33]  I just found out he's Indian this moment.
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[00:02:38]  Ronnie?
[00:02:39]  That's not an Indian name, is it?
[00:02:41]  I'm sure that's a nickname.
[00:02:43]  Ron Eve?
[00:02:44]  Maybe.
[00:02:45]  Who knows?
[00:02:45]  Never had a Ron Eve?
[00:02:46]  Is that a name?
[00:02:47]  Never met her.
[00:02:48]  I'm assuming that's somebody, something like that.

=== Getting Punched in the Face (15:35) ===

[00:02:51]  Anyway, that's why he told me.
[00:02:53]  NBA 2K20, welcome to the next.
[00:02:56]  Now let's get the show started.
[00:02:58]  We just received news that SNL has said Sayonara to Shane Gilles.
[00:03:03]  And he said.
[00:03:06]  That's why, that's why, that's why I just said.
[00:03:11]  That's lowered my seat.
[00:03:13]  How the fuck I do.
[00:03:14]  There you go.
[00:03:15]  There you go.
[00:03:16]  You should just bow.
[00:03:18]  I got here bowing on Slavery Society.
[00:03:21]  I respect him with a gong.
[00:03:24]  Son, gong shit.
[00:03:26]  That's fucked up.
[00:03:27]  But real talk.
[00:03:28]  Gave him the five fingers of death, Red Shinsu sword to the contract.
[00:03:33]  Hot out here.
[00:03:34]  If you don't.
[00:03:35]  Hot out here for a white man.
[00:03:36]  Dude, it's hot.
[00:03:37]  It's hot out here.
[00:03:38]  Give us a shot.
[00:03:39]  One of them fans, son.
[00:03:46]  So for those of y'all don't know, SNL hired three new people.
[00:03:51]  Some chick that nobody cares about, apparently.
[00:03:55]  Bowen Yang, this is an Asian dude who had a hilarious viral video.
[00:03:59]  Did you see the video of him?
[00:04:01]  Okay, remember The Devil Wears Prada?
[00:04:03]  Yeah.
[00:04:03]  Do you remember the scene where I think it's Meryl Streep or the other white chick?
[00:04:06]  I don't know what else.
[00:04:08]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:04:08]  So the scene where Meryl Streep's explaining the like the history of a fucking dress or some shit.
[00:04:14]  Whatever.
[00:04:14]  It's a funny, like, obnoxious scene.
[00:04:16]  He lip syncs this thing so fucking well.
[00:04:20]  Like, if there is anything that it's proven that, like, you can mock a race and get into SNL.
[00:04:26]  Yeah.
[00:04:26]  Oh, yeah.
[00:04:28]  There is a way to do it.
[00:04:30]  He just did it right.
[00:04:31]  There's ways to do it.
[00:04:32]  This guy, Bo, Yang, it's really fucking good.
[00:04:35]  I mean, that's stuff.
[00:04:35]  We can't play it because we'll probably get flagged, but just go look it up.
[00:04:39]  Yeah.
[00:04:40]  It's really good.
[00:04:41]  I mean, that's not bullshit.
[00:04:42]  That's what people were defending Shane about.
[00:04:43]  They were like, yo, they make fun of white people, black people all the time on SNL.
[00:04:48]  Right.
[00:04:48]  Why is it that this guy making fun of Asian people, granted, however he may feel?
[00:04:54]  We'll go into it.
[00:04:54]  That was the defense.
[00:04:55]  That was the defense.
[00:04:56]  We'll go into it.
[00:04:57]  And I think when you get into that type of argument, well, where it's like a he said, she said type of thing, I think everybody loses in a lot of ways.
[00:05:03]  But so basically, Shane, the second he goes up for this SNL thing, you have these fucking parasites, right?
[00:05:10]  They're these blogger parasites whose only job is to try to get you to lose your job.
[00:05:15]  Yeah, they're ruining lives.
[00:05:16]  They are ruining lives.
[00:05:17]  They care about nothing but their own retweets, their own clicks.
[00:05:21]  They are literally there to cause controversy and have corporations bend to their whim.
[00:05:26]  That's how they validate themselves: they are powerless incels living in their parents' basement.
[00:05:31]  And what they do is they go, I'm actually a real person if I can get bounty to stop selling paper towels on this TV show.
[00:05:36]  That's what a female incel is.
[00:05:38]  A blogger.
[00:05:39]  A female incel.
[00:05:40]  Oh, my God.
[00:05:41]  The guy who started is a guy.
[00:05:42]  Wow.
[00:05:43]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:05:43]  And well, I mean, I don't know if he classified himself that way.
[00:05:46]  We don't identify you like that.
[00:05:47]  That's the new shit.
[00:05:48]  We identify you.
[00:05:49]  Hey, listen, gender is a social construct.
[00:05:51]  So I can identify you however you want.
[00:05:54]  Yeah.
[00:05:54]  All right.
[00:05:55]  Eden.
[00:06:00]  He got some tenders.
[00:06:01]  He did.
[00:06:01]  Oh, guys.
[00:06:04]  Tender was a good choice.
[00:06:05]  Good choice of words.
[00:06:06]  Tender was good.
[00:06:07]  Succulent.
[00:06:10]  Cook.
[00:06:10]  To perfection.
[00:06:13]  Anyway.
[00:06:14]  So a podcast with Shane and this other kid is on Earth.
[00:06:18]  I don't know the other kid's name.
[00:06:19]  Sorry, buddy.
[00:06:21]  But you're unimportant in this situation because you didn't lose anything.
[00:06:25]  And so basically, where Shane is saying he's making fun of like Chinatown and Chinese people.
[00:06:33]  He drops a Chinese racial slur that rhymes with blink.
[00:06:39]  Can't do that.
[00:06:40]  Sink.
[00:06:41]  That's not it.
[00:06:42]  But yeah, exactly.
[00:06:43]  And now what's interesting about this racial slur specifically is that it's not a slur when used in certain situations.
[00:06:51]  Like you can say, a chink in your armor.
[00:06:54]  Yeah.
[00:06:55]  Right?
[00:06:55]  That is okay.
[00:06:56]  Yes.
[00:06:56]  Like there's no other time to use the N-word and it's okay.
[00:07:01]  There's no, there's no, you could say Negro.
[00:07:04]  That's no, no, but the N-word specific, right?
[00:07:06]  There's no like the only other one that's like that is Cracker and it ain't that bad.
[00:07:10]  Oh, we're totally fine with Cracker.
[00:07:11]  Yeah.
[00:07:11]  We front, like we're upset about it, but just so you know, we just want to get on the outrage.
[00:07:15]  No, We just, we're trying to manipulate you guys into not getting an effective one.
[00:07:19]  We're like, oh, that hurt so bad.
[00:07:21]  It's so bad to be called slave owners.
[00:07:25]  So, but so basically this clip comes out and he's he's just talking about Chinatown and like talking about and like saying this word.
[00:07:35]  And it's the worst thing to defend.
[00:07:38]  Yeah.
[00:07:39]  I know Shane.
[00:07:40]  He's a good guy.
[00:07:41]  He's a nice guy.
[00:07:42]  He's very funny too.
[00:07:42]  He's a funny guy.
[00:07:43]  Okay.
[00:07:45]  It's the worst thing to defend because he's not even making a joke.
[00:07:48]  It's one thing when you make a horribly offensive joke, like an Anthony Jeselnick might do like a really offensive joke specifically to offend type of thing.
[00:07:56]  As comics, we can at least go, guys, he's obviously satirizing the situation.
[00:08:01]  He's making a joke here.
[00:08:03]  He's just kind of speaking edgy, you know.
[00:08:06]  And I understand the idea is like, I'm going to speak in a tone that will trigger people, and that will be the reason why that will be the goal of it.
[00:08:15]  But there's nothing, there wasn't anything redeeming about it.
[00:08:17]  Now, is he defined by this one moment?
[00:08:19]  No, it was a hand-selected moment to make him look bad so SNL would fire him, which they did.
[00:08:24]  Right?
[00:08:24]  So, effective, the guy who put this out, effective.
[00:08:27]  And he's going to get snuffed.
[00:08:28]  The guy who put this out, by the way, do we know who he is?
[00:08:30]  Yeah, I'm not going to say his name just now, but like, I think he's a guy on the West Coast.
[00:08:34]  It shocks me that.
[00:08:35]  Wait, what do you mean?
[00:08:36]  It was like another comic that put it out.
[00:08:37]  No, he's like a blogger of comedy.
[00:08:39]  And I think he might have done some comedy.
[00:08:40]  But like, I'm truly shocked that like West Coast guys, like, if he can walk around open mics and he can be in the comedy scene, because he hasn't done this just for him.
[00:08:48]  This is like a part of the thing that he does.
[00:08:50]  Tries to get people, get people like cancer.
[00:08:52]  Oh, you got to get that guy out.
[00:08:53]  You got to snuff this guy.
[00:08:54]  Real talk.
[00:08:55]  That's like ground level.
[00:08:56]  You got to snuff him.
[00:08:57]  A group of people got to snuff it.
[00:08:58]  Easy, right?
[00:08:58]  So, West Coast, on that.
[00:08:59]  Let's go.
[00:09:00]  Chop, chop.
[00:09:01]  Like, come on, y'all.
[00:09:02]  So, yeah, y'all really driving me some gangsters out here.
[00:09:05]  Stop that shit.
[00:09:06]  Son.
[00:09:06]  I thought he meant snuffed as in like silent.
[00:09:08]  No, he's talking about that.
[00:09:10]  You got to punch him in the face.
[00:09:12]  Absolutely.
[00:09:13]  You got to punch him in the face.
[00:09:14]  Minimum.
[00:09:15]  Son, if you saw this kid, you'd be like, oh, no, he needs to get punched in the face.
[00:09:18]  Do I think comedians are gangsters who will actually kill a person?
[00:09:22]  Nah, but we could beat the shit out of somebody if there's six of us.
[00:09:24]  If there's 50 of us at an open mic, we can do that.
[00:09:28]  We can do that.
[00:09:30]  You know what I mean?
[00:09:31]  And he deserves it.
[00:09:32]  You are ruining lives.
[00:09:33]  That's all you got to do is just get snuffed.
[00:09:35]  Like, just so you know what happens.
[00:09:37]  Like, I've been snuffed for what I said on stage.
[00:09:39]  Like, I've been punched in my face because of what I said on stage.
[00:09:41]  Really?
[00:09:42]  And I keep talking that shit.
[00:09:43]  So I'm willing to take a punch.
[00:09:45]  Yeah.
[00:09:46]  You know what I'm saying?
[00:09:48]  I know.
[00:09:48]  Worst case scenario.
[00:09:49]  I've experienced it.
[00:09:50]  We're still out here.
[00:09:51]  So you just need to experience a worst case scenario to see how bad you want to blog.
[00:09:55]  Because it's funny how your passion and drive goes away after getting punched.
[00:10:01]  It's really easy to kind of have these situations without losing anything.
[00:10:06]  It's like, oh, until you get hit with some shit where you lose it, that's when you really realize, okay, how bad you're punched in the face once, and you're like, you know what?
[00:10:12]  That wasn't that racist.
[00:10:15]  That wasn't the most racist thing I've ever seen.
[00:10:17]  Because you know what you're going to say before every joke?
[00:10:18]  And you'll be like, is this worth getting punched in the face?
[00:10:22]  I mean, I think there's a great who had it.
[00:10:24]  Burr was it?
[00:10:25]  Probably Burr.
[00:10:25]  Burr, Louie, or somebody had a bit.
[00:10:27]  Some redhead had a bit about how, like, I forget exactly what it was.
[00:10:33]  Something about the importance of getting punched in the face.
[00:10:34]  Oh, yeah, yeah.
[00:10:35]  He says, basically, women will just, we don't hate women anymore, so they just keep pushing and pushing and pushing because there's no line.
[00:10:40]  Every guy learns there's a line I don't step past because we've all been hit.
[00:10:44]  Yes, I remember I had a bit.
[00:10:45]  It was a similar idea.
[00:10:46]  It was like, it's like, you know, women haven't been punched in the face because whenever they get punched in the face, they still talking shit as they're going to the ground.
[00:10:54]  Like, they're so surprised that they're punched in the face that they don't realize it until they actually hit.
[00:11:00]  Like, they get cracked.
[00:11:00]  They're like, but why did I, what?
[00:11:04]  Did you just punch me?
[00:11:06]  Like, whenever you're a dude and you get punched in the face, you are cripplingly aware that you should have been punched in the face.
[00:11:11]  Absolutely.
[00:11:12]  You know what's coming.
[00:11:12]  You know what I'm saying?
[00:11:13]  Never just a dude get punched in the face.
[00:11:14]  And he goes, How could you?
[00:11:17]  Just punch me in the face.
[00:11:19]  You're either eating it or you're fighting or some shit.
[00:11:21]  Something's got to happen.
[00:11:22]  Exactly.
[00:11:22]  So whatever.
[00:11:24]  Point is the guy says, and I've been speaking to a lot of specifically Asian comics about this because I want to get their perspective.
[00:11:32]  And it's the toughest situation for them because when you're a comic, and Chappelle said this the best when the Kramer situation came out, he goes, I found out in that situation, I'm more comic than I am black.
[00:11:45]  Yeah.
[00:11:46]  Yeah.
[00:11:46]  Right?
[00:11:46]  I remember that.
[00:11:47]  I remember that combo.
[00:11:48]  Right.
[00:11:48]  So it was like, because the comic in me was.
[00:11:50]  He must have been bombing.
[00:11:51]  He must have been bombing.
[00:11:52]  This is a tough one, dog.
[00:11:53]  Hank, hang in there.
[00:11:54]  He's a big bomb.
[00:11:55]  Be all right, something like that, something to that extent, and like, so you have all these Asian comics that are like I can't even defend it because there's no joke to defend.
[00:12:04]  It's just casually talking now.
[00:12:09]  So so I completely understand where they're coming from in that regard.
[00:12:13]  And uh, and then and i'm looking at just different tweets that pop up and Ari Shafir said, like the best thing he goes, listen shots at.
[00:12:21]  Ari got a great uh podcast called Skeptic TANK.
[00:12:24]  Um, funny comic he goes.
[00:12:27]  If you ever hear a comic say anything racist hateful, homophobic on a podcast that he knows is being recorded, please believe it's meant to be a joke.
[00:12:39]  Yeah like, that's well said.
[00:12:41]  He's aware that he's being recorded and he might have an intended purpose.
[00:12:46]  This is just the hardest thing to defend because you can't just go.
[00:12:50]  I see what you were doing there, Dina Hashem, it was blatantly a joke.
[00:12:54]  Yes yeah yeah, so we could defend what you always say.
[00:12:57]  Judge me off intent.
[00:12:59]  I didn't think the intent was hateful, probably because I do a podcast, right yo?
[00:13:03]  People don't realize how hard it is to try to be funny for an hour and a half or whatever you're doing.
[00:13:08]  Your brain is just constantly going and sometimes you're just searching for the funny thing right, and I think he was trying to search for the funny thing and he just failed.
[00:13:16]  It just flopped, but the intent was to try to find the funny thing in my mind and so to me it's like, all right, you failed, you should deal with some consequences, but I don't think it should be losing the fucking dream opportunity that you just got exactly, and that's and that's where we're coming from, where it's like, you know, people really are losing these jobs.
[00:13:33]  And don't get me wrong, I get it, I empathize with the Asian guy who has no clue about this guy's comedy, doesn't even really know him as a stand-up and just hears him casually talking racist, and that reminds him of other casual racism he might have experienced.
[00:13:48]  I get that.
[00:13:49]  Yeah, i'm not ignorant to that.
[00:13:51]  What i'm saying is as someone who like, knows him and knows that he does comedy that is purposely triggering, yeah, like the goal is to trigger, like he'll go up there and he'll be like yeah, Trump 2020.
[00:14:02]  He don't give a fuck about Trump.
[00:14:03]  It's just what is gonna rile that group of people up, shake the table right, right and um what?
[00:14:09]  What I noticed was interesting about this is, once the narrative is set, now everybody's trying to confirm narrative.
[00:14:15]  So narrative got set as he doesn't like Asians.
[00:14:19]  And now they start looking through everything he's ever done yeah, and start finding the Anti-Asians.
[00:14:23]  There was like some other video that popped up recently or something like that.
[00:14:26]  There was an article that popped up where he was like you can, you can make fun of Asians and audiences don't care.
[00:14:31]  And that was the only sentence that was taken from it and I asked him about it.
[00:14:34]  I was like I was like bro, that's that kind of sounds weird, what's up with that?
[00:14:37]  And he's like dude, they didn't even keep the entire segment of what I said or they didn't post.
[00:14:43]  If you listen to the whole thing, the context, I'm saying it is completely hypocritical that you can make fun of Asians yeah, and it's okay, and other groups you can't.
[00:14:50]  Like that's unfair.
[00:14:51]  Yeah, Joe Coy talks about that fucking bunch of people talked about.
[00:14:55]  It's like yo, Asians just get made fun of all the time, like Lil Dicks, all this other, like all the white people, stupid stereotypes.
[00:15:00]  Like you get it.
[00:15:01]  Can I?
[00:15:01]  Can I also say something as a comic?
[00:15:03]  Maybe it's because I'm a comic I've got.
[00:15:06]  I dealt with brown jokes growing Up, I perform in the hood rooms, coming up, and I would hear the hackiest shit.
[00:15:11]  Yes, I never once thought to myself that guy should lose anything.
[00:15:16]  I thought that's not funny, bro.
[00:15:18]  It's not funny.
[00:15:18]  That's all.
[00:15:19]  That's the worst thing about it: imagine the entire world sees your comedy for comedy, quote unquote, comedy for the first time, and it's the worst comedy you've put out.
[00:15:29]  Yeah, it's not like it was a bit that he worked on that went viral that they're like, This is offensive.
[00:15:33]  That you could live with, right?
[00:15:34]  You're like, I stand behind a joke.
[00:15:35]  If you don't like it, you don't like it.
[00:15:36]  Yeah, but to have like the shitty conversation where you did low-hanging fruit, we've all been there, but that's what everybody finds out about.
[00:15:46]  And you don't know how young he is in comedy.
[00:15:48]  And I know so many unfunny jokes that I made that probably just sounded pure hateful because I didn't know how to be funny.
[00:15:56]  It sounds like it's the easiest, most natural thing in the world that you should just know right away.
[00:16:00]  It takes a long time to learn how to be funny consistently.
[00:16:03]  Yep, consistently.
[00:16:05]  Everybody has a moment.
[00:16:06]  Yo, but when you got to shoot all the time on the clock, there's a difference between shooting in your backyard and being Steph Curry.
[00:16:13]  Yeah, there's a big fucking cravas between the two.
[00:16:16]  Yeah.
[00:16:16]  And that's what you got to try to bridge the gap as a comic.
[00:16:19]  And it takes years.
[00:16:20]  Yeah.
[00:16:21]  And he probably put it out early.
[00:16:23]  Yeah.
[00:16:24]  Yeah.
[00:16:24]  It's a shame.
[00:16:25]  It sucks for him, man.
[00:16:27]  I mean, the one thing I took away from it was because usually when these things happen, I'm like, all right, who are the people that should be offended feel?
[00:16:34]  Like, how do they feel?
[00:16:35]  And I think Pablo Torre had like a tweet, and I watched him a lot on the high noon with Bomani.
[00:16:41]  And he said something along the lines of like, not only he was just more offended that you just wasn't funny.
[00:16:48]  Same thing you said.
[00:16:49]  Exactly.
[00:16:49]  You know what I mean?
[00:16:50]  And it's like, he's a guy who sees all that, probably sees all the Asian jokes, makes all the Asian jokes.
[00:16:54]  He's a guy on the SPN, one of the biggest fucking platforms on the planet.
[00:16:58]  And, you know, not only was he offensive, it was offensive and unfunny.
[00:17:02]  So it's just like, like you said, once it's the hardest thing to defend, man, and the people that should be offended feel away about it, then I'm just like, can't you just be offended?
[00:17:11]  Why you got to be offended and fire somebody?
[00:17:13]  Yeah.
[00:17:14]  Why it's got to be both.
[00:17:15]  Yeah.
[00:17:15]  I can't just be offended.
[00:17:17]  But it's not that.
[00:17:19]  Here's the difference between that was offensive and that's offensive.
[00:17:21]  Your career should be over.
[00:17:22]  I mean, what it comes down to is like, I get SNL's, you know, position there, man.
[00:17:28]  Like, they can't afford to lose any viewers.
[00:17:30]  Man, if it's like, and if they're at the point where it's like, yeah, this guy's going to look like the most anti-Asian dude, and you lose a lot of Asian viewers, and there's a lot of Asian people that I assume watch the show.
[00:17:41]  Yeah.
[00:17:42]  Then you got to.
[00:17:42]  Bro, nobody watched that show.
[00:17:44]  Let's be honest.
[00:17:45]  It's only white girls that watch that show.
[00:17:47]  White Jewish girls watch SNL.
[00:17:48]  That's it.
[00:17:49]  There's nobody else in the world.
[00:17:49]  I watched performances on Hulu.
[00:17:51]  No, no.
[00:17:53]  That's the thing that I'm trying to tell people: is like SNL is a YouTube show.
[00:17:57]  Yeah.
[00:17:58]  Like, this is what people don't realize.
[00:17:59]  Nobody watches it live.
[00:18:01]  You watch the sketches that were actually good, if they have any, that are good.
[00:18:06]  You watch them the next day or that week on YouTube.
[00:18:08]  So here's my feeling: it's like, if your goal is to be on SNL, you can achieve that exact same goal by just putting something up on YouTube.
[00:18:18]  The only difference is bookings.
[00:18:20]  Like, there's people who are on SNL who I don't see a bunch of viral sketches of theirs, but I see them on a lot of shows.
[00:18:24]  Not saying they're not funny because they are.

=== SNL vs YouTube Strategy (07:57) ===

[00:18:26]  Right, right.
[00:18:26]  But like, oh, you're going to get comics.
[00:18:28]  Yes.
[00:18:28]  And as a comic, you get the bookings.
[00:18:30]  Exactly.
[00:18:30]  And that's what's going to change.
[00:18:31]  And you get money.
[00:18:32]  And your life changes overnight.
[00:18:34]  That's why I can't hate on motherfuckers that do that show.
[00:18:36]  Like, every comic in the world hates on SNL.
[00:18:39]  And then they get offered SNL, and then that's the thing they want more than anything.
[00:18:42]  This is a comic thing we all do.
[00:18:43]  We hate on everything until they offer it to us.
[00:18:45]  And then we're like, oh, I'd love to do that.
[00:18:47]  It's very rare that you're a comic that's financially secure enough to turn shit down.
[00:18:52]  Yeah.
[00:18:52]  Drew.
[00:18:52]  Would you do SNL?
[00:18:54]  I'd host it.
[00:18:55]  I've no interest in being on the show.
[00:18:58]  I honestly would be tempted because you're looking at Andrews again.
[00:19:01]  Like he used the exact words financially secure enough.
[00:19:04]  I'm doing pretty well.
[00:19:06]  And if it came down to this or SNL, it's this all day.
[00:19:09]  But there's a security with SNLs.
[00:19:10]  Oh, my next five years are good.
[00:19:12]  Just that credit.
[00:19:14]  I got five years.
[00:19:14]  And whatever I do with that is on me.
[00:19:16]  But I got five years now.
[00:19:17]  I'm good.
[00:19:18]  So as much as I don't like that show, I'm going to do it.
[00:19:21]  Yeah.
[00:19:22]  Yeah.
[00:19:23]  I can't knock anybody for doing something that makes you secure.
[00:19:25]  I don't think that that might, that may or may not be the right decision for me because we got this, it's different.
[00:19:31]  So for me, but it would cross my mind.
[00:19:33]  I'd think about it for sure.
[00:19:34]  And I think at the end of the day, I'm always going to do this over everything.
[00:19:37]  But there's that part of your head that's like not financially secure.
[00:19:41]  It's like, son, this is five years.
[00:19:43]  I don't knock any comic with a job that wants to take a role in comedy.
[00:19:47]  I understand the pull of that.
[00:19:49]  I've been in that situation where I've done shows I didn't want to do because there was financial security attached.
[00:19:54]  I host a fucking dating show on MTV.
[00:19:56]  It sucked.
[00:19:58]  But I did it because I had a contract and I was obligated to do it.
[00:20:02]  So I understand going from like barely making it to six figures and how that feels.
[00:20:09]  It's a fucking great feeling.
[00:20:11]  But you were going to say something.
[00:20:12]  No, no, no.
[00:20:13]  I was just curious if you guys weren't.
[00:20:14]  But in terms of doing the show, I've never really liked SNL.
[00:20:18]  I never watched SNL.
[00:20:19]  I was like, I was a little kid, man.
[00:20:21]  SNL had it's run, man.
[00:20:23]  I was never into it.
[00:20:24]  It's had its moments like, okay, like... Sandler Farley Spade, them, which really got me into it before with like Eddie Murphy, even like the mid-2000s, like with fucking cheerleading shit.
[00:20:36]  Kaz got to pretend he watched Eddie Murphy because he's black.
[00:20:38]  You were too young, bro.
[00:20:40]  He was younger than me.
[00:20:42]  I watched the rerun.
[00:20:42]  I watched Gumby.
[00:20:44]  I just feel they just have standout clips every once in a while.
[00:20:48]  Like the Jack in the Box joint.
[00:20:49]  Like everybody, you have little things that just like popped and resonated in it.
[00:20:53]  It's an institution, right?
[00:20:54]  So this is what SNL is.
[00:20:56]  It's a dick in the box sign.
[00:20:58]  It's a dick in the box.
[00:20:59]  It's a shortcut to the top of Hollywood.
[00:21:06]  Yes.
[00:21:06]  Well, right.
[00:21:07]  So like you're in SNL.
[00:21:09]  You're in the Hollywood matrix.
[00:21:11]  All those writers from SNL go on to write the movies.
[00:21:14]  All those writers go on to maybe direct or produce stuff.
[00:21:18]  And you're in this direct pipeline to the top of Hollywood.
[00:21:21]  It's like getting into an Ivy League school.
[00:21:23]  Yes.
[00:21:24]  And ironically, all the writers are from an Ivy League.
[00:21:26]  Yeah.
[00:21:27]  So they've curated a program, right?
[00:21:29]  It's like it is the white privilege of entertainment.
[00:21:33]  If white privilege, the idea is that there's this system and structure set up to benefit white people.
[00:21:39]  Hollywood and comedy have SNL, which is this system and structure to benefit the talent that's on SNL.
[00:21:47]  And you see them going in and having success in Hollywood indirectly.
[00:21:50]  And rightfully so.
[00:21:52]  The problem is Hollywood's crumbling.
[00:21:56]  The shows don't work.
[00:21:57]  The movies don't work.
[00:21:59]  The things don't work.
[00:22:00]  And the powers that be in the industry are no longer part of that matrix.
[00:22:06]  There's not a massive breakout star from SNL that we can remember for a while.
[00:22:11]  The biggest one is probably Pete.
[00:22:13]  I was about to say Pete.
[00:22:14]  He's got suicides go out.
[00:22:15]  He's barely on the show.
[00:22:17]  But think about it.
[00:22:18]  Y'all can't name a single thing Pete did funny on the show.
[00:22:20]  His first monologue.
[00:22:22]  First monologue was great, which was his stand-up.
[00:22:24]  Yep.
[00:22:26]  And it was his stand-up, though, because he was a stand-up.
[00:22:29]  And I think he still does stand-up.
[00:22:31]  He was a funny stand-up.
[00:22:32]  So it's like, we know Pete from antics.
[00:22:34]  We know Pete from dating Ariana Grande and like mental health shit.
[00:22:38]  So it's like the pipeline.
[00:22:40]  Antics, mental health shit.
[00:22:42]  You know what I'm saying?
[00:22:42]  Like TMZ.
[00:22:44]  He's a young fucking idea of the show.
[00:22:47]  Pizza Freddy Comics, Pete's also a star.
[00:22:49]  And he's fucking awesome.
[00:22:50]  He just is a star.
[00:22:51]  That's all there is to it.
[00:22:52]  He's got a presence.
[00:22:52]  He's got it.
[00:22:53]  I get it.
[00:22:53]  So there's this pipeline, but now the pipeline leads to something that isn't as fruitful as it used to.
[00:23:01]  So I don't think it has the same value.
[00:23:05]  And I think that's what a lot of people are starting to realize.
[00:23:07]  You know, you have a guy like Jay Farrow, who was a standout sensation on the show, killed it.
[00:23:12]  Great impressionist.
[00:23:14]  Amazing impressionist.
[00:23:15]  Leaves the show, has a Showtime series, doesn't really go.
[00:23:22]  And now, where is he?
[00:23:23]  The guy is undeniably talented.
[00:23:25]  Back in the day, that's Jay Farrow directly to movies where he's doing.
[00:23:32]  It's like, it's not the Eddie's model, but it's because Eddie's Eddie.
[00:23:36]  But there's a lot more offered.
[00:23:39]  There was a time where you do SNL two or three years.
[00:23:42]  You are headlining, starring in a major motion picture, major high-budget movie within two or three years.
[00:23:48]  Jason Sudekis.
[00:23:49]  Exactly.
[00:23:50]  Fucking all the women from there.
[00:23:52]  Fucking Tina Faye, the other, the blonde haired girl on Parks and Recreation.
[00:23:57]  I forgot her name.
[00:23:58]  All of them.
[00:23:59]  Kristen Wig, another one.
[00:24:01]  Now it's just kind of like, I don't know, like Keenan Thompson got a show.
[00:24:05]  So it's interesting.
[00:24:06]  It's like they all had their movies.
[00:24:10]  And now, instead of like headlining movies, they're back to playing like characters.
[00:24:18]  Back in the day, that was not the SNL model.
[00:24:19]  It was, I'm going to put you in some movies on some side shit, and then eventually you're going to be running it.
[00:24:24]  It's yours.
[00:24:24]  This is the next generation of comics.
[00:24:26]  But that's not what's happening.
[00:24:29]  The people that run a business are operating in the internet space already.
[00:24:34]  The Rogans.
[00:24:35]  You know what I mean?
[00:24:36]  Like that, those are the people that are pushing it.
[00:24:38]  Those are the people getting millions of views.
[00:24:40]  When one podcast of his gets more views than like the month of SNLs, honestly, it might be more two months of SNL.
[00:24:50]  There's no more sitcoms.
[00:24:51]  So it's not like you do that show and then get a sitcom.
[00:24:56]  It's a tricky situation.
[00:24:57]  Very tricky.
[00:24:58]  And they have talent there.
[00:24:59]  Michael J, head writer.
[00:25:01]  Love Michael J. Fucking talented.
[00:25:03]  Fucking hilarious.
[00:25:04]  Hilarious stand-up.
[00:25:04]  I saw him at the garden the other day at Monday Night Raw.
[00:25:08]  Oh, yeah.
[00:25:08]  Every time I see him, I tell him to quit.
[00:25:10]  Quit SNL.
[00:25:11]  Every time I see him, let's do some stand-up.
[00:25:13]  Let's go.
[00:25:14]  Let's do this.
[00:25:14]  This is what you're born to do.
[00:25:15]  You're supposed to do stand-up.
[00:25:16]  Granted, I'm sure he feels a responsibility, first blackhead writer of the show.
[00:25:21]  He's going to get certain guests and certain artists on that show that wouldn't have been a good idea.
[00:25:24]  He's already there certain sketches that wouldn't.
[00:25:26]  100%.
[00:25:26]  He's had a profound effect on that show.
[00:25:28]  Absolutely.
[00:25:29]  And he's doing what many people talk about doing when they're in positions of power, but maybe don't.
[00:25:35]  He's truly putting people on.
[00:25:38]  And which is awesome.
[00:25:42]  And I'm maybe coming from this situation of privilege, which is just like, well, I don't need to put anybody on my skin color.
[00:25:48]  I can do it with my boys, et cetera.
[00:25:50]  But the selfish part of me is like, yo, you're really good at stand-up.
[00:25:53]  Do some fucking stand-up.
[00:25:55]  He'll get there eventually.
[00:25:56]  He'll get back eventually.
[00:25:57]  That Netflix especially put out Michael Che Matters.
[00:26:00]  Still one of my favorite stand-ups of the past 10 years at least.
[00:26:04]  But yes.
[00:26:05]  So it's an interesting situation with Shane, man.
[00:26:07]  And I hope Shane learns from this and rallies from this.
[00:26:11]  And the way you win is the Rick Ross model.
[00:26:14]  You just put out hits.
[00:26:16]  Now is the time for Shane to be funny, put out funny, address this funny, just win with funny.

=== Kanye West's Cultural Influence (05:50) ===

[00:26:24]  You know, 6'9, the whole world wanted to kill him.
[00:26:27]  And every day he put a new little thing on Instagram that was funny.
[00:26:29]  And we're like, I'll kill him.
[00:26:32]  No, you still kind of want to kill him now.
[00:26:34]  A few dudes want to kill him.
[00:26:36]  But you're also like, ah, this guy's pretty cute.
[00:26:38]  This is a shit.
[00:26:38]  They want to kill him because he stopped putting out that fire content.
[00:26:41]  Okay, we're done with this.
[00:26:43]  Maybe we touch bass a little bit, but Kaz has to run, so we want to get this flagrant thought of the week out casually.
[00:26:48]  Yeah, shout out to Kanye West being the most the greatest manipulator of black people I've ever seen in my life.
[00:26:55]  Whoa.
[00:26:56]  And number two is like, is so far like Obama's like way below.
[00:27:01]  Yeah.
[00:27:02]  Not manipulating, but just as far as like flagrant.
[00:27:05]  It's not even missing the point of me saying manipulating.
[00:27:09]  I'm talking about as far as like no matter what I say, people will follow me, whether good, bad, and different.
[00:27:16]  Kanye West.
[00:27:16]  I've never seen an Alex had to check Cat on his blackness.
[00:27:20]  This is I watched the fucking...
[00:27:22]  I've been watching like the Sunday.
[00:27:24]  You've been watching the Sunday service shit.
[00:27:26]  Great, right?
[00:27:28]  He got me.
[00:27:28]  I ain't going to lie.
[00:27:29]  He got me.
[00:27:30]  He got me back, so that fucking easy.
[00:27:33]  That's not easy.
[00:27:34]  He's not doing anything.
[00:27:35]  And mind you, it's great.
[00:27:36]  And I caught a lot of shit on Twitter yesterday because I was like, I didn't even say this, how it made me feel about church or whatever.
[00:27:43]  I just said, yo, this ain't weird to y'all.
[00:27:45]  Question mark.
[00:27:46]  And I had Kanye stands, like church freaks, like super religious people coming to me like, no, you don't understand.
[00:27:53]  Like prophets, they use, and Jesus used prostitutes and the worst people and da-da-da to spread his message.
[00:27:59]  And don't you think that, da-da-da?
[00:28:00]  I'm like.
[00:28:01]  So Kanye's a prophet?
[00:28:03]  Hey, I'm like, listen.
[00:28:05]  Kanye can't even hold his own prophets, bro.
[00:28:07]  His wife got more prophets than he do.
[00:28:09]  I'm like, Kanye has convinced motherfuckers fashion in music, production, footwear now, religion, politics, literally every fabric of black, you know, or just any type of pop culture, he's kind of influenced somehow.
[00:28:29]  And it's like, no matter what he's said or done, people have just always found excuses for him to just be like, oh, well, you know, it's Kanye and this is that.
[00:28:39]  And it's fine.
[00:28:40]  But like, it's, it's, at this point, I'm just like, it's the first time, well, second time in my life, since the MAGA shit, since the yay shit, where I legitimately couldn't care less about the dude.
[00:28:50]  Like at all.
[00:28:51]  He announced the album was coming out and all this other shit.
[00:28:54]  And it's the first time in my life.
[00:28:55]  And I was just like, I don't care.
[00:28:57]  It's a very interesting take.
[00:28:58]  I don't care.
[00:28:59]  I've always said that Kanye's greatest gift, his genius, is taking white shit and making it cool for black people.
[00:29:06]  Yeah, now it's gospel.
[00:29:07]  So, so, and what's interesting is, is, you know, let's say it starts with back in the day when he was wearing the fucking like, you know, white colors.
[00:29:15]  Pink polos.
[00:29:15]  Pink polos, the like cacky light.
[00:29:18]  Yeah, he was doing that waspy, like, Connecticut culture, right?
[00:29:21]  And then he shifts to like the grunge culture, the Seattle scene with the baggy sweats and the baggy sweatshirt or whatever, and rip sweatshirts with the Yeezy line.
[00:29:30]  Then he takes dad sneakers, like the classic, you know, head coach, Nike.
[00:29:35]  He's doing different subdivisions of white features.
[00:29:37]  Different subdivisions, like the uncoolest part of white culture, he makes cool for black people.
[00:29:42]  He tried to do it with the MAGA hat, right?
[00:29:44]  He tried.
[00:29:45]  That didn't work.
[00:29:45]  Didn't work, but it got close.
[00:29:47]  It was a hot stove.
[00:29:48]  People were close.
[00:29:50]  And by and large, we didn't fuck with it, but there was a good amount of people.
[00:29:53]  Wolf Carter could wear the hat.
[00:29:54]  I could wear it.
[00:29:55]  I'm like, y'all crazy.
[00:29:56]  So, and what's very interesting is music has been synonymous with black church since the beginning.
[00:30:05]  Right.
[00:30:06]  But there was a style of music that was made for it.
[00:30:08]  It was gospel.
[00:30:09]  Yes.
[00:30:10]  And there is a white church called Hillsong, which is basically rock and roll in church.
[00:30:16]  So it's like rock, church.
[00:30:19]  And Kanye created rap church.
[00:30:22]  He created a rap church, R ⁇ B church, right?
[00:30:25]  And he's really flipped it.
[00:30:27]  And it is effective because you know what's more effective than reading Bible verses?
[00:30:32]  Rapping.
[00:30:33]  Listening to the hottest songs in the last 30 years with the best producer of music doing a religious flip on.
[00:30:41]  Yeah.
[00:30:42]  It makes me, it just really makes me uncomfortable.
[00:30:44]  Yo, this is why he don't care if he pisses black people off because he knows how he does.
[00:30:49]  We're so back to the Harvey.
[00:30:52]  No, black people are forgiving as fuck.
[00:30:54]  Forgave him.
[00:30:54]  We just ignore all the bullshit and just listen to the music.
[00:30:57]  Until he touches that's for kids.
[00:30:59]  We're not going to be able to do it.
[00:31:01]  Wouldn't anybody need anything else from Kanye except just listen to my music?
[00:31:05]  Just buy my shit.
[00:31:06]  Wouldn't you need anything else from him?
[00:31:08]  You just needed him to just be like, Yeah, what the fuck are you talking about?
[00:31:10]  You don't have like being like, I'll fuck with Andrew.
[00:31:12]  I just go to all his shows.
[00:31:14]  That's it.
[00:31:14]  But I was like, like the art.
[00:31:17]  You can just like the music and not like the person.
[00:31:20]  But that he puts out like that.
[00:31:23]  That's why, and that's why I had my heart, and this is going to be such a sharp left turn before I go without having to defend it much.
[00:31:29]  This is why it was so hard for me to put down R. Kelly for the longest time because I think just like that.
[00:31:33]  Yeah, but you fuck kids.
[00:31:34]  It's different.
[00:31:36]  Maybe he fucks him kids.
[00:31:37]  You see what I'm saying, though?
[00:31:38]  Like, years ago, I was like, oh, man, Leano, I could just, he's so talented.
[00:31:42]  He makes good music.
[00:31:44]  Like, and it was so easy for me to turn that away, but now it's just like, well, he's just trying to be a troll.
[00:31:48]  Also, Kaz was a kid when that was happening, so he had something in common with R. Kelly.
[00:31:52]  He was like, I think these 15-year-old bitches are 15-year-old bitches.
[00:31:58]  You know what I mean?
[00:31:58]  All right, Kels.
[00:31:59]  I see you, Kaz.
[00:32:00]  But what I'm saying is when you support the music and support the bullshit, too.
[00:32:04]  That's why he was so relatable to Kaz in that moment in his life.
[00:32:08]  He was so influential.
[00:32:09]  Kaz comes every day thinking, yo, R. Kelly onto something.

=== R Kelly and Child Abuse (04:18) ===

[00:32:14]  Finally, someone's speaking to me.
[00:32:16]  Okay?
[00:32:17]  All these rappers talking about girls in their 20s.
[00:32:19]  I don't want these old bitches.
[00:32:20]  All right, all right.
[00:32:21]  I got to break out.
[00:32:22]  I need a young chick with barrettes in her hair.
[00:32:25]  He's like, damn, bro.
[00:32:26]  Until he got that baddie I was looking at on MySpace.
[00:32:31]  Okay.
[00:32:33]  Very interesting point.
[00:32:34]  Akash, you got a flagrant thought of the week.
[00:32:36]  Yeah, I got a friend.
[00:32:37]  I was in LA.
[00:32:38]  He's talking about he's taking anger management classes.
[00:32:40]  And then I realize how come men are always taking anger management classes.
[00:32:45]  And there's no class for bitches to stop making us so angry.
[00:32:48]  This is an interesting point.
[00:32:49]  You never see a woman in an anger management class.
[00:32:52]  That is true.
[00:32:53]  It's all men getting pissed off by their girlfriends.
[00:32:55]  And they're like, yo, you got a problem.
[00:32:56]  You should see somebody.
[00:32:58]  Yes.
[00:32:58]  There's never a class.
[00:32:59]  It's like, yo, can you shut the fuck up sometimes?
[00:33:01]  You never see gay guys in anger management.
[00:33:04]  Bro, for what?
[00:33:05]  That is fascinating.
[00:33:07]  Is there gay anger management?
[00:33:09]  And I would say they're the most angry.
[00:33:11]  Gays?
[00:33:12]  Yeah, they give mad sass all the time.
[00:33:15]  Sassy's not angry.
[00:33:16]  That sass is when you're not angry.
[00:33:18]  That's them trying to flirt.
[00:33:19]  They're probably trying to fuck you, Alex.
[00:33:20]  Yo, son, this gay dude tried to play.
[00:33:23]  This gay dude tried to play Hard to Get with me.
[00:33:28]  Oh, shit.
[00:33:28]  Son, I was at this party with my girl, one of these like fashion things, right?
[00:33:33]  And it's all gay dudes and me and this Indian gay.
[00:33:36]  So it's all gay dudes.
[00:33:37]  Oh, we got gay.
[00:33:38]  It's all gay guys.
[00:33:39]  This Indian gay walks up, like he's walking by.
[00:33:41]  He sees me.
[00:33:42]  Was it me?
[00:33:42]  He goes like this.
[00:33:44]  He goes like this.
[00:33:44]  He goes, he's walking by.
[00:33:46]  He like sees me.
[00:33:47]  He like looks at me and then he goes, and then looks away.
[00:33:52]  And I was like, yo, this guy was trying to play hard to get.
[00:33:54]  Did a little party you want to get him?
[00:33:56]  Just, you know what I mean?
[00:33:57]  Let him know.
[00:33:58]  Nah, dude.
[00:33:59]  All right.
[00:33:59]  So here's my flagrant thought.
[00:34:01]  Flagrant thought of the week.
[00:34:02]  I went to go see the Goldfinch with my girl yesterday.
[00:34:04]  Do you know The Goldfinch, that movie?
[00:34:06]  No, bro.
[00:34:07]  Yo, Goldfinch.
[00:34:08]  Yeah, cinema you watched.
[00:34:09]  Good ass movie, right?
[00:34:10]  Fucking brilliant movie.
[00:34:11]  And I'm watching this movie.
[00:34:12]  It's based on a book, right?
[00:34:15]  And gay.
[00:34:17]  I'm not watching Harry Potter saving tigers in Asia and shit.
[00:34:22]  What the fuck is he on?
[00:34:23]  All right, go, goldfish.
[00:34:24]  Sorry.
[00:34:24]  You don't watch Harry Potter, son?
[00:34:26]  Son.
[00:34:26]  Yeah, when I was a kid.
[00:34:28]  When was the last time you watched Harry Potter?
[00:34:30]  Be real.
[00:34:33]  Is there because he mentioned it so that I was like, oh, fucked up.
[00:34:36]  Let me bring that shit back.
[00:34:37]  This guy knew.
[00:34:37]  Maggot ass has a wand at his house that he bought at Harry Potter World.
[00:34:41]  I don't even hear shit for that.
[00:34:42]  That's why he was lying because that shit just opened up like in the past five years.
[00:34:46]  That's why I thought it went recently down in the world.
[00:34:51]  Drafting your fucking Gryffindor outfit.
[00:34:53]  I don't hear nothing from you, dog.
[00:34:56]  Anyway, not even Gryffindor.
[00:34:59]  I'm Ravenclaw.
[00:35:00]  Nah, I'm the bad one.
[00:35:02]  You're a loser.
[00:35:03]  You're not slithering.
[00:35:03]  I'm slithering.
[00:35:04]  No, you're not.
[00:35:05]  You're not even close to slithering.
[00:35:06]  Dude, the sorting hat would be like, get out.
[00:35:09]  Sorting hat wouldn't even choose you.
[00:35:11]  Go back outside.
[00:35:13]  Okay, so we're at this movie watching the Goldfinch, right?
[00:35:16]  And the Goldfinch takes place in two, there's two timelines.
[00:35:19]  There's one where Ansel Elgort plays the kid who's, let's say, in his 20s, right?
[00:35:24]  Mid-20s.
[00:35:24]  Ansel Elgort.
[00:35:25]  Do you know who he is?
[00:35:26]  No fucking clue.
[00:35:27]  You do know him.
[00:35:28]  He's a fuck, I forget the name of the.
[00:35:31]  Oh, is he Game of Thrones?
[00:35:33]  No, If you can get up a picture of him, that'd be good.
[00:35:36]  Just so we can put some context in.
[00:35:38]  He's actually fucking really good actor and like more so than actor, like star quality, comes through the screen.
[00:35:45]  This kid right here.
[00:35:46]  Okay.
[00:35:46]  Okay.
[00:35:47]  Yeah, I think I know him.
[00:35:48]  You've seen him in different movies.
[00:35:49]  That kid right there?
[00:35:50]  Yeah.
[00:35:51]  Yeah, I've seen him.
[00:35:51]  Oh, a driver or some shit?
[00:35:52]  Not driver.
[00:35:53]  Baby driver.
[00:35:54]  Baby driver.
[00:35:55]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:35:55]  You've seen that shit.
[00:35:55]  Oh, yeah, he's good.
[00:35:57]  So that's him as a kid.
[00:35:58]  Yeah.
[00:35:59]  Right?
[00:35:59]  And that's him as adult, and they take place in two timelines.
[00:36:02]  So the kid one, right?
[00:36:02]  The kids, let's say, tops middle school, maybe first year high school.
[00:36:08]  Right.
[00:36:08]  Tops.
[00:36:09]  Right.
[00:36:10]  Middle school, maybe first year of high school.
[00:36:11]  Part of the time, like the kid, I'm not going to ruin any movie, but he has to go to Las Vegas and he befriends some kid in Las Vegas.
[00:36:18]  Let's say he's Tops freshman high school.
[00:36:21]  Befriends some kid in Vegas who's this Russian kid played by that smart ass kid that was in it.
[00:36:25]  I forget his name.
[00:36:25]  He's also in Stranger Things.
[00:36:27]  Really pale, white kid.
[00:36:29]  Doesn't matter.
[00:36:30]  Finn Wolf hard.
[00:36:31]  Finn Wolf, whatever.

=== Baby Driver Movie Comparison (16:03) ===

[00:36:32]  Doesn't matter.
[00:36:34]  So they like establish this friendship and they're both like lonely and then they meet each other.
[00:36:40]  They establish this friendship and they're doing fucking drugs and the Finn guy is getting them to do acid.
[00:36:46]  They're doing fucking they're snorting Valium snorting Viking.
[00:36:50]  They're smoking cigarettes drinking.
[00:36:52]  They're like middle school freshmen, right?
[00:36:54]  And then they start to get a little close and then this kid right here wants to leave and run away to New York.
[00:37:01]  And the Finn kid is like, don't leave.
[00:37:03]  Wait a day.
[00:37:03]  And he's like, no, I got to go now.
[00:37:04]  Just come with me.
[00:37:05]  Just come with me.
[00:37:05]  And he goes, wait a second.
[00:37:06]  And then stops.
[00:37:08]  And I'm like, they're not going to fucking do it.
[00:37:09]  Are they?
[00:37:10]  How are they going to do it?
[00:37:11]  He stops, grabs his face and fucking kisses.
[00:37:14]  And I'm at the movie theater.
[00:37:15]  I'm like, do you have to do that?
[00:37:19]  They're fucking 15 years old or 14 years old or 13 years old.
[00:37:23]  They're 13 years old.
[00:37:24]  They're kissing in a fucking movie.
[00:37:26]  Like, do you have to put that fucking shit in here?
[00:37:28]  What the hell is going on?
[00:37:29]  And my girl just starts laughing.
[00:37:31]  And I'm like, what?
[00:37:32]  And she's like, it's just funny that that's a big deal to you.
[00:37:35]  And I'm like, yeah, it's absurd.
[00:37:36]  Why the fuck do you have to like inject this nonsense in their children?
[00:37:39]  Just let them be kids.
[00:37:40]  And she was like, she goes, she goes, she goes, she goes, I mean, you just didn't have a problem with them doing acid for the last 30 minutes.
[00:37:48]  Drinking, smoking, doing Viking, doing Valium, all this kind of shit.
[00:37:53]  And I fucking died laughing.
[00:37:55]  I was like, so true.
[00:37:56]  Like, I was totally like, how could you let children do that?
[00:38:00]  What kind of messaging is this to the kids?
[00:38:02]  When they just had an innocent, loving kiss because they cared about each other.
[00:38:06]  And when they were doing blow and all that kind of stuff, I was like, the kids be wild sometimes.
[00:38:09]  You know what I mean?
[00:38:10]  You got to experiment.
[00:38:11]  I just don't like it because it feels jammed in, like you said.
[00:38:13]  It does feel jammed in.
[00:38:14]  That's why I don't like it.
[00:38:15]  It does feel jammed in, but.
[00:38:17]  I thought you were upset because the dude at the fashion thing didn't do that to you.
[00:38:23]  You want him to jam some kids in?
[00:38:26]  No, it was, but it just exposed my bias, man.
[00:38:29]  I have a bias.
[00:38:31]  Wow.
[00:38:31]  But I also thought about it like this.
[00:38:34]  If they were two young girls and they kissed, would I be okay with it?
[00:38:38]  And I don't know.
[00:38:41]  There's part of me that's like, I don't even, I don't know if we need to see kids fucking kissing.
[00:38:46]  Nah, I think you're biased because if it was a boy and a girl, I don't think you would have any problem with that.
[00:38:52]  I would think I'd probably have less of a problem, to be honest.
[00:38:54]  But if it was a kid that thought he was gay and then a girl like forced him to kiss, I'd be like, what you doing?
[00:38:58]  Just because y'all friends, you think you would kiss?
[00:39:00]  I would totally be okay with that.
[00:39:01]  But I'd be more okay with it.
[00:39:03]  I'd still be like, yo, what you doing?
[00:39:04]  And then this, it's like, I don't think the kid knows he's gay or straight or what?
[00:39:09]  I don't know.
[00:39:09]  It just feels different when it's like, if he's a kid that already identifies as gay and he kisses a dude, all right, there you go.
[00:39:15]  But it's like they're making it a more real shit.
[00:39:18]  That shit is gross, bro.
[00:39:22]  But no, Let me tell you.
[00:39:30]  Edit point.
[00:39:31]  No, That shit is mad gross.
[00:39:34]  But I'll tell you what.
[00:39:36]  No, no, no.
[00:39:37]  It's gross as fuck.
[00:39:38]  But like, yo, but here's the thing.
[00:39:42]  It's gross as fuck.
[00:39:43]  Come on.
[00:39:43]  When two dudes kiss, it's absolutely repulsive because.
[00:39:48]  Wait for it.
[00:39:49]  Wait for it.
[00:39:49]  It's just because it's two guys.
[00:39:56]  No, no, just let me.
[00:39:57]  Hold on, hold on.
[00:39:58]  Let me finish.
[00:39:59]  Let me get you on to something.
[00:40:00]  Let me finish.
[00:40:01]  He's on to something.
[00:40:02]  So it's because it's two men making out, and that's absolutely disgusting.
[00:40:07]  So that's the thing.
[00:40:11]  Is that like when you see that, you're like, that's gross as fuck.
[00:40:15]  I never want to look at that again, ever in my life.
[00:40:18]  So, but the thing is, this, right?
[00:40:20]  I thought about it, and I'm like, holy shit, does that make me like homophobic or something like that?
[00:40:24]  And then I realized two girls kissing is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen.
[00:40:29]  And I don't even mean that in terms of like, oh my God, I just want to whack off.
[00:40:33]  It's like I saw these two chicks kissing on the street yesterday and it was like beautiful and fucking sensual and like it was it wasn't even sex, like elegant and stuff like that, and I was like oh okay, that's cool.
[00:40:51]  So it's not necessarily a homophobia.
[00:40:57]  Do you know what I mean?
[00:40:58]  If this is what it's like?
[00:40:59]  I'm not into cilantro, right.
[00:41:02]  So when I see cilantro on shit right, I'm like yeah right okay okay, that doesn't mean cilantro is bad for you or you.
[00:41:15]  It's just.
[00:41:16]  When I see the cilantro on things, I'm just like that's not my cup of tea.
[00:41:20]  I can, you can have some cilantro, you can have some, I don't need the cilantro.
[00:41:24]  Got a joke about that.
[00:41:25]  What he says he says in this is like his first special.
[00:41:27]  Why do I do this?
[00:41:28]  He sees two guys making out and then he's like I was just eating fries.
[00:41:32]  I was all in my head and then I was like, ah man, I don't want to see that.
[00:41:35]  And then some girl starts trying to like yell at him and he's like I thought about it.
[00:41:38]  He's like when I used to watch porn.
[00:41:40]  If I saw a guy and a girl and they were doing doggy style, I'd be like I didn't know anything about sexuality.
[00:41:44]  I'd be like that.
[00:41:44]  I want to fucking do that.
[00:41:46]  That looks great.
[00:41:47]  But at the same time, whenever they did anything with like feet or like put feet in their mouth, I was like oh, come on man, I don't want to see that.
[00:41:52]  It was gross to me.
[00:41:53]  But that doesn't mean that I hate feet and I don't want them in my neighborhood, right?
[00:41:58]  I mean, I can't relate to that at all because I love feet.
[00:42:00]  But I understand what you're saying.
[00:42:03]  I understand what you're.
[00:42:04]  Hey here's, you know what.
[00:42:05]  Okay, let's talk about it let's.
[00:42:08]  I think we already started the conversation.
[00:42:10]  Let's have a conversation.
[00:42:12]  A guy with a nice foot a foot is a foot.
[00:42:18]  A foot is not a man and a foot is not a woman.
[00:42:20]  A foot is a foot.
[00:42:22]  You know, you don't know what kind of genitales are attached to that foot.
[00:42:26]  If there was like a glory hole in a glory hole in a bar, but it was just a foot that was sticking out, it was two holes and you stuck feet out and then you could just fuck the feet but you had no clue what it was, that's a foot.
[00:42:42]  A foot is a foot.
[00:42:44]  You would Alex's feet.
[00:42:45]  Alex got a nice feet.
[00:42:46]  This is too close to me.
[00:42:47]  I just posted my feet on instagram the other day.
[00:42:49]  On instagram, I have certain issues with Alex's feet, like what Alex's feet look like they've been in a snake's belly What?
[00:42:58]  Like there's no space.
[00:42:59]  Like they've been like, you know, like constricted.
[00:43:00]  And like, you know, like when a snake...
[00:43:02]  You ever seen like a deer get pulled out of a snake's belly?
[00:43:05]  How like the deer is all like stuck together?
[00:43:08]  You know what I mean?
[00:43:09]  Like I look like Asian girls' feet when they break them for ballet.
[00:43:15]  They've been wrapped.
[00:43:16]  You look like your feet have been wrapped to be like the most aerodynamic.
[00:43:19]  Yes.
[00:43:20]  You look like your feet are like ready to be on the front of a boat.
[00:43:25]  You want a more girthy foot.
[00:43:28]  This is what your feet look like.
[00:43:30]  This is what your feet look like.
[00:43:33]  You know, like to cut the wind, like you would put your foot on the front of the boat.
[00:43:37]  It's like the nose of a plane.
[00:43:38]  It's the nose of the plane.
[00:43:39]  You have nose of plane feet.
[00:43:40]  Nose of plane feet.
[00:43:41]  That's what you have, right?
[00:43:42]  Like, for example, like if, you know, that when Jack was in the front of Titanic and he's like, I'm the king of the world, right?
[00:43:48]  Like he was feeling the wind in his jacket.
[00:43:50]  But if you just put your foot straight, like you would feel nothing because it would just cut the wind and it would go equally on either side.
[00:43:56]  It'll go faster.
[00:43:57]  Say again?
[00:43:57]  The boat will go faster.
[00:43:58]  You would add a mile per hour.
[00:43:59]  You would add one nautical mile per hour with your feet.
[00:44:04]  That's how slender and straight your feet are.
[00:44:05]  But I think you have no balance.
[00:44:06]  Probably could have cut through the glacier with that pointy ass.
[00:44:10]  Oh, dude.
[00:44:11]  He was good at karate.
[00:44:13]  That's part of the reason I think you were good at karate.
[00:44:15]  It's because it's so sharp and it's so slender.
[00:44:17]  Your feet are almost like...
[00:44:19]  Have I paid enough attention to your feet?
[00:44:23]  But your feet are like a T-1000.
[00:44:27]  You know, and he could make it.
[00:44:28]  You know what's funny is Alex is mad, uncomfortable with this, but when you said his feet weren't nice, he was like, well, hold on, no, why?
[00:44:33]  You're not saying, you know what your feet look like?
[00:44:36]  Get up a kangaroo.
[00:44:37]  Get up a kangaroo.
[00:44:38]  Oh, I want to see you.
[00:44:39]  Get up a kangaroo.
[00:44:40]  That's Alex's feet.
[00:44:42]  If you get up a kangaroo, you're going to see his feet.
[00:44:44]  Pull it up next to his Instagram.
[00:44:46]  That's what Alex is doing.
[00:44:50]  I want you to get that right there is Alex's feet.
[00:44:54]  That's an Alex foot right there, completely flat.
[00:44:57]  Get your foot out.
[00:44:58]  I'll get your foot out.
[00:44:59]  Get your foot out right now.
[00:45:00]  It is exactly like...
[00:45:03]  No, not like that, not like that, not like that.
[00:45:06]  When it's that right there.
[00:45:08]  Just that right there.
[00:45:10]  Just that's right there.
[00:45:12]  That's look at this.
[00:45:14]  Right, you're really looking at the whole block.
[00:45:16]  Alex's feet.
[00:45:16]  That's crazy.
[00:45:17]  And hold on.
[00:45:18]  I need you to actually come from this angle right here.
[00:45:20]  You can see outside.
[00:45:21]  Come on this angle right here so you can see outside.
[00:45:24]  You're going to just put your foot right up there.
[00:45:27]  Put your foot right up there if you can.
[00:45:29]  Look at it from that angle.
[00:45:31]  Arkash, look at it from that angle.
[00:45:32]  And then look at that.
[00:45:33]  They're the same.
[00:45:36]  Your shit is mad crunched together.
[00:45:37]  And I think you've got a low arch, actually, now that I'm on the floor.
[00:45:39]  Low arch, just like a kangaroo.
[00:45:41]  You can't have pretty feet with flat feet.
[00:45:43]  Come on, it's sexy.
[00:45:44]  Come on, come on, come on.
[00:45:44]  Not awful.
[00:45:45]  Not awful.
[00:45:45]  Not my cup.
[00:45:46]  Andrew, how do you feel about foot binding or feet binding?
[00:45:48]  I don't like that because I think it distorts the foot.
[00:45:51]  I like a nice foot over a small foot.
[00:45:53]  I don't value small.
[00:45:54]  It's not about size.
[00:45:55]  I prefer you not to have too big.
[00:45:57]  But back to what we're saying.
[00:45:58]  Guys kissing.
[00:46:01]  But can I be honest with you?
[00:46:03]  I've seen straight couples kiss that I'm not into.
[00:46:05]  Is it just how ugly the people are to you?
[00:46:07]  And all guys are ugly.
[00:46:08]  Exactly.
[00:46:09]  Right.
[00:46:09]  But not all guys are ugly.
[00:46:10]  I can say, like, you're attractive.
[00:46:12]  You're goodly.
[00:46:12]  You have, like, features that are.
[00:46:14]  I'm a pretty motherfucker.
[00:46:15]  No, no, no.
[00:46:16]  Like, I'm not one of those dudes that can't admit.
[00:46:18]  Of course.
[00:46:18]  Like, whatever.
[00:46:19]  You know what I mean?
[00:46:20]  You want to fuck the whole podcast.
[00:46:21]  Yeah, okay.
[00:46:22]  That's a lot.
[00:46:22]  What you just said?
[00:46:23]  What are you putting on the fucking TV, Eddie?
[00:46:25]  Come on, Zach.
[00:46:26]  Is that really that distracting to you?
[00:46:28]  Oh, so now I'm the asshole.
[00:46:29]  Hold on.
[00:46:32]  Hold on, son.
[00:46:34]  Hold on, son.
[00:46:35]  Hold on.
[00:46:36]  Shut the fuck up.
[00:46:38]  So, look, so look, earlier I go seeing two dudes kiss.
[00:46:42]  That's gross, right?
[00:46:44]  Eden puts up 20 pictures of two guys centrally making out on a screen, and Al doesn't notice it and turns to him and goes, oh, come on, son.
[00:46:55]  Come on.
[00:46:56]  Akash hasn't even looked at the periphery of it.
[00:46:59]  But did I ever disagree with you when it was ghost?
[00:47:01]  Did I disagree with you or did I just laugh?
[00:47:03]  Did I laugh a silent agreement laugh?
[00:47:05]  A silent agreement laughed.
[00:47:06]  Yes, 100%.
[00:47:07]  So the point is, it has nothing to.
[00:47:10]  You can find something unattractive and totally want them to have rights and want them to be able to kiss as much as they possibly could kiss.
[00:47:18]  Like, you could do all that.
[00:47:20]  That's totally fine.
[00:47:22]  We can.
[00:47:25]  And get these fucking guys off the screen.
[00:47:28]  He wanted to go.
[00:47:30]  He wanted to go.
[00:47:33]  My God, you gotta have some fucking kangaroos here.
[00:47:35]  It's a normal thing.
[00:47:36]  You know, like, that's like a kangaroo feed for a little bit.
[00:47:40]  So that's some bullshit.
[00:47:43]  No, You're crazy.
[00:47:46]  You're crazy.
[00:47:47]  But isn't that the crazy thing?
[00:47:48]  Like, that you can't, like, I would imagine, and correct me if I'm wrong, the gay guys that listen to this.
[00:47:53]  I know we got some gay flagrant two asshole army out here, the real army.
[00:47:57]  I love the gays.
[00:47:58]  Yo, so I would imagine you don't particularly enjoy watching straight couples make out.
[00:48:05]  Yeah.
[00:48:05]  You probably think lesbians kissing is gross.
[00:48:08]  Facts.
[00:48:10]  That's two people I am completely unattractive and just don't make it out in front of me.
[00:48:13]  You don't want to fuck.
[00:48:14]  Like, that's another thing.
[00:48:15]  Like, I'm not big.
[00:48:16]  Like, I could watch a tranny fuck a girl because that's.
[00:48:23]  What kind of?
[00:48:24]  I could watch a male tranny a man that got titties but still got his dick fuck a girl because that's more straight because that's more tits It's the same amount of dicks in a porn, which is one same amount of pussies in a porn, which is the girl.
[00:48:44]  Yeah.
[00:48:45]  But now you have two more tits.
[00:48:48]  It's a little too unusual for my taste.
[00:48:50]  Shit is a little unusual.
[00:48:52]  It's unusual, but I'm not going to be like, oh, more tits.
[00:48:56]  Right?
[00:48:57]  It's just a dude with tits.
[00:49:00]  And a what?
[00:49:03]  And a chick!
[00:49:04]  The chick is still a chick, and it's a dude with tits.
[00:49:10]  Right?
[00:49:11]  I mean, like, I'm not.
[00:49:12]  I see the logic.
[00:49:13]  It's not my first selection.
[00:49:15]  I don't emotionally agree with you, but I see the logic.
[00:49:20]  I don't.
[00:49:21]  What you said didn't resonate within me.
[00:49:22]  It's like, you know what?
[00:49:24]  Understand.
[00:49:24]  I feel the same fucking way.
[00:49:26]  Motherfuckers will be like, oh, that shit's gay, whatever.
[00:49:28]  Like that.
[00:49:28]  It's like, it's straighter.
[00:49:31]  It's straighter.
[00:49:32]  It's more tits.
[00:49:35]  It's the same amount of dick.
[00:49:37]  More tits.
[00:49:39]  Like, there are two dynamics.
[00:49:40]  Jamie Lee Curtis getting fucked by Jamie Lee Curtis.
[00:49:52]  Think about it.
[00:49:53]  Imagine, imagine that.
[00:49:54]  We're going to take these episodes to Patreon at some point.
[00:49:56]  I'm just saying.
[00:49:58]  Imagine, none of us tried out for SNL.
[00:50:02]  Listen, imagine.
[00:50:04]  Imagine they try to come for us for this episode.
[00:50:06]  Imagine I'm like, I saw a fucking guy's face.
[00:50:13]  Just as long as I don't see the touch with God.
[00:50:23]  Imagine you fucking feet.
[00:50:25]  And then the shower stall doors mad, like thin and hollow.
[00:50:29]  And all of a sudden, you start feeling, just start moving back and forth.
[00:50:40]  You want me to cup them?
[00:50:43]  You want me to point my toes a little?
[00:50:44]  You want me to point my toes?
[00:50:46]  You want me to attach the toes?
[00:50:49]  Yo, what if you fucking, yo, son, what if someone has so much foot dexterity?
[00:50:53]  Is it you fucking the feet?
[00:50:54]  And then all of a sudden, the toes just lock like that.
[00:51:00]  The toes just went webbing to webbing.
[00:51:02]  You were like, oh, shit.
[00:51:05]  Oh, shit.
[00:51:06]  Son, Alex's toes too close together.
[00:51:09]  They can't do that.
[00:51:10]  Alex P looked like Oscar Pastor.
[00:51:14]  We got the bleed button over here, son.
[00:51:21]  Try to cancel me.
[00:51:23]  Try to cancel me.
[00:51:27]  Oh, that's so good.
[00:51:30]  Oh, fuck.
[00:51:31]  You know what I mean now?
[00:51:33]  You know what I mean?
[00:51:36]  Let's pivot.
[00:51:37]  What you got?
[00:51:39]  Did you see that group text we got from Angry Somalian?
[00:51:42]  No, what happened?
[00:51:43]  Oh, yo.
[00:51:44]  It said, Make America White again.
[00:51:46]  And then I read the last couple lines and I was like, I don't need this in my life.
[00:51:49]  And it was just mad, hateful, bro.
[00:51:50]  I know, it really was.
[00:51:51]  And she said, Make America White again.
[00:51:52]  And I thought it would be like a joke.
[00:51:54]  And I was like, I didn't know he was Somali.
[00:51:56]  I was like, oh, I think this guy wants to make America white again.
[00:51:59]  Who's this?
[00:52:00]  It was some IGDM.
[00:52:02]  Yeah.
[00:52:02]  We got all group text.
[00:52:03]  Just some more hate shit.
[00:52:04]  It's like, you know, get punched, basically.
[00:52:08]  Me?
[00:52:08]  Yeah.
[00:52:09]  Oh.
[00:52:10]  Somalis are upset again?
[00:52:12]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:52:12]  He probably just saw it late.
[00:52:14]  Late to the cover up.
[00:52:15]  Y'all need to make it like your girls clitz and cut that shit out, bro.
[00:52:19]  I ain't going to have no more of these death threats, yo.
[00:52:23]  No more of these.
[00:52:24]  What did Joey say?
[00:52:26]  Cut it out.
[00:52:29]  You think some of them will watch?
[00:52:31]  You think some of them will watch him full house after circumstances?

=== Joey Diaz Death Threats (06:49) ===

[00:52:35]  Let's do the act out.
[00:52:36]  Let's do that to act out.
[00:52:38]  I be the Somali doctor.
[00:52:40]  You be the father, okay?
[00:52:42]  It's a girl.
[00:52:43]  What would you like us to do?
[00:52:45]  Oh, my God.
[00:52:45]  No, no, no.
[00:52:58]  This Saturday night, live from New York.
[00:53:01]  It's not jumps.
[00:53:04]  Oraka.
[00:53:07]  Oh, my God.
[00:53:09]  Yo, let's start a sketch show called Friday Night Live, and we just put out all the shit SNL.
[00:53:13]  No, we're doing a sketch show.
[00:53:14]  Flagrant Night Live, bro.
[00:53:15]  That's coming.
[00:53:16]  Flagrant Night Live.
[00:53:18]  When we got situations in place, we go to the ship.
[00:53:21]  First cast member, Shane Gillis.
[00:53:23]  We get Shane.
[00:53:24]  No, but we got to have Matt Shane with an Asian.
[00:53:27]  Shang Wang.
[00:53:28]  We got to have.
[00:53:31]  Yeah, Shane got to do something funny.
[00:53:33]  Shane got to go to Asia.
[00:53:34]  Shane got to go to Hong Kong and protest.
[00:53:37]  That's the only way that he, you know, how they're trying to like.
[00:53:39]  Yeah, yeah, yeah, go protest with them.
[00:53:41]  You need to go protest.
[00:53:42]  Would it be?
[00:53:42]  Would you think he'd get away with it if you tried to mock their accents while he was doing it?
[00:53:47]  Winning room.
[00:53:52]  I'm just trying to fit in.
[00:53:54]  Guys, I'm looking for some neuter.
[00:53:57]  That's what it was.
[00:53:59]  You kept saying noodle.
[00:54:01]  Yo, but it's like, I'm not going to stop.
[00:54:04]  I'm not going to stop making fun of the way people speak.
[00:54:07]  Like, the way we all speak is funny.
[00:54:09]  It's funny.
[00:54:10]  Castle Peter's the highest grossing comic in the world because that's what he did.
[00:54:13]  Eddie Murphy.
[00:54:14]  Oh, yeah, man.
[00:54:15]  Like, should Eddie Murphy ever go to accent?
[00:54:21]  Talk about it real quick.
[00:54:23]  Eddie be 100% okay with that making out.
[00:54:28]  Eddie already got a couple of them DVDs you were just talking about.
[00:54:31]  Facts.
[00:54:35]  Okay.
[00:54:36]  It does not sound like you're saying facts.
[00:54:37]  Don't let them fuck that up.
[00:54:39]  Don't let them distort that.
[00:54:41]  Don't be distorting me.
[00:54:42]  Everybody be distorting.
[00:54:44]  Stop.
[00:54:44]  Y'all need to stop distorting.
[00:54:45]  You better make sure you caption this video.
[00:54:47]  Yo.
[00:54:50]  I gotta let y'all know something, man.
[00:54:52]  While we're talking about kangaroos, yo, we coming to Australia.
[00:55:02]  We come into Australia.
[00:55:04]  All right, fine.
[00:55:05]  I got to tell you guys this real quick just because I fuck.
[00:55:07]  Flagrant 2, I love y'all.
[00:55:08]  Assho Army, I love y'all.
[00:55:13]  So, New York, we sold out Town Hall.
[00:55:17]  Y'all sold out Town Hall.
[00:55:18]  God damn.
[00:55:18]  It's the biggest venue I've ever had.
[00:55:22]  And we sold that shit out.
[00:55:25]  Shows two months away.
[00:55:27]  I was being a little bit of a pussy, not adding another show.
[00:55:29]  I'm like, what if people don't come out?
[00:55:30]  What if I don't have a second show?
[00:55:31]  Blah, blah, blah.
[00:55:32]  And I said, fuck it.
[00:55:34]  I ain't going to be no more pussy about this shit.
[00:55:36]  We're going out here.
[00:55:37]  We're doing it.
[00:55:39]  We added a second show, Town Hall.
[00:55:42]  Okay?
[00:55:43]  Two shows, Town Hall.
[00:55:44]  Let's sell both them motherfuckers out.
[00:55:46]  You saw both of them.
[00:55:48]  That's more people than if we did the beacon.
[00:55:51]  God damn.
[00:55:51]  That's a big move right there.
[00:55:53]  So we add another show, 11-22.
[00:55:56]  Ticket pre-sale is today.
[00:55:58]  So if you're listening to today, you can get tickets to that.
[00:56:01]  The code is Matador.
[00:56:02]  It goes on sale to the public on Wednesday, but I want to give y'all a day to get them tickets early.
[00:56:08]  So the tickets pre-sale today.
[00:56:09]  Code is Matador.
[00:56:10]  We did the same thing for Boston.
[00:56:11]  Sold out Wilbert Theater.
[00:56:13]  We're doing another one, Wilbert Theater as well.
[00:56:15]  God damn.
[00:56:16]  Damn, we're cooking.
[00:56:17]  All right.
[00:56:17]  We ain't going to be pussy about this.
[00:56:18]  We're going to fucking go for it.
[00:56:19]  We're going to be hungry and we're going to grind.
[00:56:21]  We're going to get the word out.
[00:56:22]  You guys are going to get the word out, but let's sell that shit out as well.
[00:56:25]  Same thing.
[00:56:26]  Tickets come out today.
[00:56:27]  Code is Matador for the pre-sale.
[00:56:30]  Go get them shits.
[00:56:31]  And this week, while you are listening to this, we will be flying to Australia.
[00:56:35]  Alex Media, Mark Gagnon, myself.
[00:56:38]  And we're doing Adelaide, Perth, Perth show is almost sold out, might be sold out.
[00:56:43]  Brisbane, first show, sold out, added, second show.
[00:56:46]  Sydney, two shows sold out, added a third.
[00:56:48]  Melbourne, two shows, sold out, added a third.
[00:56:50]  Go get them tickets right now for what remains.
[00:56:53]  If you guys are from Australia, you got recommendations for us to go check out in all those cities.
[00:56:57]  You know we're doing dropping in.
[00:56:59]  That fucking Russia dropping in slap, Al.
[00:57:02]  That shit slap.
[00:57:03]  We had 250K, maybe something like that already.
[00:57:05]  Russia love that shit.
[00:57:06]  Yo, Russia was amazing.
[00:57:08]  So I want to do a few dropping ins while we're in Australia.
[00:57:11]  Okay.
[00:57:12]  So, yo, spread the word, Australia.
[00:57:15]  And if you got cool shit for us to check out, you know what we do in these dropping ins.
[00:57:18]  You got good things to recommend.
[00:57:20]  Let us know.
[00:57:21]  Let's do it.
[00:57:23]  Oh, yeah.
[00:57:24]  Sacramento, both shows sold out.
[00:57:25]  We added a third that Sunday, so go get that as well.
[00:57:27]  TheandroShows.com.
[00:57:28]  We're adding more shows.
[00:57:29]  We're going to be in Florida, Palm Beach, October 26th.
[00:57:32]  Come out to that.
[00:57:33]  We just posted a link for that tickets as well.
[00:57:36]  Just go check out The Andrew Shows.
[00:57:37]  There's more cities there.
[00:57:38]  Akash, what you got?
[00:57:40]  Los Angeles sold out.
[00:57:42]  Damn, boy.
[00:57:43]  If you didn't buy tickets, you fucked up.
[00:57:45]  Next time we come back.
[00:57:47]  When are you going there?
[00:57:48]  I'm there this Thursday, 8 p.m.
[00:57:51]  Next time we come back, we're going to do two shows for sure.
[00:57:54]  But tickets are already sold out for that.
[00:57:55]  But Portland, there's still tickets for Curious Comedy at 7:30 on Friday, September 20th.
[00:58:00]  October 11th, we're in Minneapolis at Sisyphus Brewing.
[00:58:03]  Two shows, 8 and 10.30.
[00:58:06]  The next day in Detroit, we're at Independent Comedy Club at 9 p.m.
[00:58:09]  And then November 7th through November 9th, we are in San Diego at American Comedy Club.
[00:58:14]  There's a Thursday, 8 o'clock, Friday, 8 o'clock, Saturday, 7 and 30, 7:30 and 9.30.
[00:58:19]  Amazing, man.
[00:58:20]  Doing the weekend.
[00:58:20]  And then I'll get you out the 2020 shows next time.
[00:58:24]  Got a couple coming in 2020 also.
[00:58:26]  Go support and get there early because these shows are selling the fuck out.
[00:58:29]  Yes, sir.
[00:58:30]  Okay, don't take your time.
[00:58:31]  Yes, sir.
[00:58:32]  We having fun, too.
[00:58:33]  Yes, sir.
[00:58:34]  Because that should be going away.
[00:58:36]  San Francisco is fun, man.
[00:58:37]  Our audience is time.
[00:58:38]  We got the best audience.
[00:58:40]  Yo, my Don, this is the guy who's featuring for me, was in San Francisco before me.
[00:58:44]  Yeah.
[00:58:45]  Complaining about the audiences the whole time.
[00:58:47]  Came after my shows.
[00:58:48]  He's like, man, every time.
[00:58:49]  Your audience is the best.
[00:58:50]  He's like, I can't even wait because I know what it's going to be.
[00:58:52]  And then, as soon as he got off, he's like, it's the most fun I had in the city.
[00:58:55]  It's the fucking best.
[00:58:57]  Yeah, if we get the best audience in comedy.
[00:58:58]  Because they're smart.
[00:58:59]  They're not dumb.
[00:59:01]  That's the difference from us and other audiences that are just kind of like, we like offensive.
[00:59:05]  We like offensive.
[00:59:06]  Our fans are smart too.
[00:59:08]  Smart.
[00:59:10]  Flagrant.
[00:59:11]  Yep.
[00:59:12]  Like to get their feet rubbed.
[00:59:15]  Say again.
[00:59:17]  Oh, yeah.
[00:59:18]  Alex just gave me a nice little reminder.
[00:59:21]  But the point is, yo, I think we're very excited.
[00:59:23]  Good things.
[00:59:24]  Good things going down.

=== San Francisco Audience Energy (03:02) ===

[00:59:25]  What happened?
[00:59:25]  I fucked up.
[00:59:28]  What I do.
[00:59:28]  I got a hangnail on my fucking thing.
[00:59:31]  I can't get it.
[00:59:32]  Oh, on your finger.
[00:59:32]  I thought it was on your toe, son.
[00:59:33]  That'd be a problem.
[00:59:34]  No, no, I got that shit on my finger.
[00:59:35]  I can't cut that shit the fuck off.
[00:59:38]  Do you like your own feet?
[00:59:39]  Do I like my own feet?
[00:59:40]  Yeah.
[00:59:41]  I feel like if you got a foot thing, you probably don't like your feet.
[00:59:43]  You probably don't got good feet.
[00:59:44]  Because I like feet in mine.
[00:59:46]  You aren't that great.
[00:59:47]  His feet are terrible.
[00:59:48]  Not as bad as our cost.
[00:59:49]  Our cost feet.
[00:59:51]  Nah, bro.
[00:59:51]  Your shit is the worst.
[00:59:52]  Caz don't have to be afraid.
[00:59:53]  Yours are the worst.
[00:59:54]  Nah, Alex objectively judged when we got pedicures.
[00:59:56]  Yeah.
[00:59:57]  And he said, your foot shape is the worst.
[00:59:59]  I've ruined my own feet.
[01:00:01]  Your shit is flat, dog.
[01:00:03]  It's mad flat.
[01:00:04]  The way that your fingers, or not even your toes, are shaped is disgusting.
[01:00:08]  It's repulsive.
[01:00:09]  You're right about that, but your foot is fucking horrendous, dog.
[01:00:12]  Your foot feels like watching guys kiss.
[01:00:17]  Dead serious.
[01:00:19]  I'm being serious, dude.
[01:00:20]  I feel the same way.
[01:00:22]  Your foot in the sandal, I couldn't even watch it.
[01:00:25]  You know what?
[01:00:26]  Get that out of here.
[01:00:26]  You got a Jamie Lee Carter.
[01:00:27]  We're just doing that right now.
[01:00:30]  You got a Jamie Lee Carter.
[01:00:32]  You're the only one that thinks they look iron.
[01:00:33]  Go back to Chelsea.
[01:00:36]  Get these feet the fuck out of here.
[01:00:38]  Let's get back to Chelsea.
[01:00:40]  Guys, if you found $100 on the street, would you pick it up or would you keep walking?
[01:00:46]  Of course you'd fucking pick it up.
[01:00:48]  You know what the hell that you're going to do.
[01:00:49]  You're going to take that money.
[01:00:50]  So why do you keep picking winners and not betting on them?
[01:00:53]  Huh?
[01:00:54]  That's what you should do.
[01:00:55]  You got to check out mybookie.com.
[01:00:57]  It's fast.
[01:00:57]  It's easy.
[01:00:58]  And they pay you when you win because where you're betting is just as important as who you're betting on.
[01:01:04]  Do the smart thing.
[01:01:06]  You do the smart thing.
[01:01:08]  Okay?
[01:01:10]  If you're going to bet this football season, you bet with my bookie.
[01:01:13]  Did you know that you could bet on games after kickoff?
[01:01:16]  If by the second half, it looks like your bet is going to lose.
[01:01:18]  Guess what you can do?
[01:01:19]  You can always take the other side.
[01:01:20]  Oh, yeah.
[01:01:21]  That's how this shit works.
[01:01:22]  If you're the kind of person that likes to bet a little and win a lot, try a parlay.
[01:01:27]  Parlay means you've been on multiple games.
[01:01:28]  And if all of them pan out, you actually get a bigger return.
[01:01:34]  And no matter how much you bet, the NFL season is the best time of year.
[01:01:39]  Join mybookie.com and they're going to double your first deposit.
[01:01:42]  They're going to double your first deposit, okay?
[01:01:44]  That means you put money in, they double it.
[01:01:46]  You get to gamble with all that.
[01:01:48]  As long as you use the promo code Flagrant, you visit mybookie.com.
[01:01:53]  Promo code Flagrant.
[01:01:55]  You play, you win, you get paid.
[01:01:59]  Okay?
[01:02:00]  Now, this podcast is also brought to you by sports criminals.
[01:02:04]  Fame, money, ego.
[01:02:06]  These things can make athletes seem superhuman.
[01:02:09]  But what happens when those in professional sports reveal the darker side of their humanity?
[01:02:13]  Every week, the Podcast Network's new podcast, Sports Criminals, explores some of the most significant sports crimes in the world.
[01:02:20]  I love this idea.
[01:02:21]  I love that podcasting is transitioning and getting into this long form, almost documentary-esque version of the podcast.

=== Sports Criminals Podcast Intro (04:41) ===

[01:02:28]  They're really informative.
[01:02:31]  It's just fucking dope to see the genre evolve.
[01:02:33]  That's what we're seeing with this right now.
[01:02:35]  And look, some are chilling.
[01:02:38]  Like when former NFL receiver Ray Karut hired a friend to murder his pregnant girlfriend.
[01:02:44]  I mean, that's a little raisy.
[01:02:47]  Some of these crimes are reckless when former NBA player Jason Williams, that's tall, not white chocolate.
[01:02:55]  Yeah, that's not white chocolate.
[01:02:56]  Milk chocolate.
[01:02:57]  That is Milk Chocolate Center.
[01:02:59]  There's another Jay Williams that I've beaten.
[01:03:01]  Oh, yeah, yeah.
[01:03:02]  Basketball that we all know about, of course, the infamous Hesse.
[01:03:05]  He remembers it to this day.
[01:03:07]  He has not invited me on boardroom because of it, probably.
[01:03:11]  Jason Williams shot his limo driver to death and then tried to cover it up.
[01:03:15]  And some of these crimes are unimaginably tragic, like wrestler Chris Benoit, who murdered his wife and seven-year-old son before committing suicide.
[01:03:23]  Sports criminals, athletes, you thought you knew crimes you won't forget.
[01:03:26]  Listen and subscribe to sports criminals for free on Spotify and anywhere you listen to podcasts or visit podcast.com/slash sports criminals to listen now.
[01:03:36]  And we are back to the show.
[01:03:37]  The baby bladder has been evacuated.
[01:03:41]  Evacuated.
[01:03:42]  I was going to say unleashed, but it's not really unleashed, is it?
[01:03:45]  Nah, bro.
[01:03:46]  Talk to me, my G. Breaking news, which is a story we're going to cover.
[01:03:49]  Jalen Ramsey just requested a trade.
[01:03:52]  Oh!
[01:03:53]  Yeah.
[01:03:54]  So if anybody hadn't seen the video, Doug Marone is the Jacksonville Jaguars head coach.
[01:03:58]  Jalen Ramsey, really talented, but also a really obnoxious cornerback.
[01:04:02]  Yeah.
[01:04:03]  They got into some kind of tiff on the sidelines.
[01:04:05]  He was huffing and puffing.
[01:04:06]  And he had to be restrained.
[01:04:07]  Yeah.
[01:04:07]  His teammates had to hold him back.
[01:04:09]  One of his teammates also pointed at the coach, like, get the fuck out of here, which makes me think he might not be that popular.
[01:04:14]  But Jalen Ramsey has said, get me off this team.
[01:04:16]  I want to trade.
[01:04:17]  So that just happened.
[01:04:18]  Your thoughts?
[01:04:20]  I don't know if I want him enough to give up like a premium pick.
[01:04:25]  It just seems, it's starting to seem like it's a lot of trouble.
[01:04:28]  So if you really wanted to be off a team, don't you think that the smart way to do it is to go to your coach and go to the GM and say, hey, privately, I want out of here, but you can get more for me if I don't make a stink because that means the other teams don't know that you really want to get rid of me.
[01:04:56]  Yeah.
[01:04:57]  If I make a big stink out of this, then you're going to get less.
[01:05:01]  Yeah.
[01:05:02]  So why don't we be what is it?
[01:05:04]  Amiable, amicable?
[01:05:06]  Amicable.
[01:05:06]  Why don't we be amicable about this split?
[01:05:09]  You go get the best deal you possibly can get from me.
[01:05:12]  I get the fuck out of here.
[01:05:13]  You're happy.
[01:05:14]  Everyone's happy.
[01:05:15]  Because now teams are going to undervalue the trade because they're like, listen, they're desperate to get rid of him.
[01:05:19]  Yeah.
[01:05:19]  So I'm going to.
[01:05:20]  And I don't know if I want him.
[01:05:21]  And I don't know if I want him because he's problematic.
[01:05:23]  So this is a guy I thought the Cowboys should have picked over Ezekiel Ellie because running backs aren't whatever they don't hold their value.
[01:05:29]  And now I'm like, yo, I think they actually made the right pick, which is crazy to say a running back number four is the right pick, but the guy has been a problem too.
[01:05:38]  And he's been a problem too.
[01:05:39]  But at least he just keeps that shit with women.
[01:05:41]  You don't bring it to the team.
[01:05:42]  Exactly.
[01:05:43]  Compartmentalize.
[01:05:44]  Compartmentalize.
[01:05:46]  Your flagrant thought of the week.
[01:05:48]  Yeah.
[01:05:48]  Yeah.
[01:05:49]  Exactly.
[01:05:50]  Maybe Zeke's girl got to take some classes.
[01:05:53]  Dude, what do they teach you in anger management?
[01:05:57]  I'll probably get out of there before it gets too crazy.
[01:05:59]  That's it.
[01:05:59]  It's just leave.
[01:06:00]  Probably.
[01:06:00]  I mean, I'm sure they got techniques of just like getting out and stepping away from the situation, whatever.
[01:06:06]  Bro, my girl was cold yesterday when we were watching the movie.
[01:06:11]  That shit annoyed the fuck out of me.
[01:06:14]  What?
[01:06:15]  Dude, she was cold.
[01:06:16]  She was like, it's so cold in here.
[01:06:18]  And I'm like, the first couple of times, I was like, all right.
[01:06:20]  And then by the end, I was like, bro, if you say you're cold, she said it more than once.
[01:06:24]  Yes, because it was cold.
[01:06:25]  I'm not going to lie, it was cold.
[01:06:26]  All right.
[01:06:26]  But what the fuck is that?
[01:06:27]  It was the eye pick.
[01:06:28]  And they got blankets.
[01:06:30]  I gave her my blanket as well.
[01:06:32]  She had two blankets?
[01:06:33]  Two blankets.
[01:06:33]  She didn't want to put it on her upper body because she's like, I don't think they wash these.
[01:06:38]  It doesn't feel clean.
[01:06:41]  I'm like, yo, I don't know.
[01:06:42]  I don't really know.
[01:06:43]  You got some patience, though.
[01:06:44]  Say what?
[01:06:45]  You got some patience, though.
[01:06:46]  I was already triggered because I saw the little kids making out and shit.
[01:06:48]  You know what I mean?
[01:06:49]  There's just a lot going on.
[01:06:54]  What was gross about it?
[01:06:55]  That they were little kids?
[01:06:57]  I don't know.
[01:06:57]  I can't even tell you.
[01:07:01]  Anyway, yeah, the Jane Ramsey shit.
[01:07:03]  Just get, get, just get the fuck out of there, dude.
[01:07:06]  Get the fuck out of there.
[01:07:07]  He's a pain in the ass.

=== Cold Show and Blankets (15:18) ===

[01:07:09]  It's just like, come on in.
[01:07:11]  He's a pain in the fucking ass.
[01:07:13]  And at the end of the day, it's like, I don't know if there's any position in the NFL that's worth having a pain in the ass.
[01:07:21]  I don't think any one position.
[01:07:24]  I really am starting to believe there's not one position that's worth having an ego.
[01:07:28]  I heard a quote that on some radio show, somebody was saying a football player told him, you can have, like, for every one bad apple in a locker room, you need about 20 to 30 good ones to keep him in line.
[01:07:41]  And that's how you control that guy.
[01:07:42]  And that's kind of how probably the Patriots can get away with having like NAB if they get away with it or Randy Moss for a few years.
[01:07:49]  Because it's like, look, we got enough people that are like, this is how we do it that we can keep you in line.
[01:07:54]  And at the end of the day, people want to fit in.
[01:07:56]  Yeah.
[01:07:57]  And then they can just kind of bully you into being like, or if you're still going to be all right, now we can just get rid of you.
[01:08:01]  There's a natural instinct to fit in.
[01:08:03]  There's a culture that's a culture that's everybody fits in.
[01:08:06]  And when you go to different countries, you at first you act as you know, if you're in your own country.
[01:08:12]  And then once you learn the customs of the new one, you start to adjust.
[01:08:16]  Yeah.
[01:08:16]  When I was in Japan, I started to adjust a little bit.
[01:08:18]  I wasn't as affectionate in public because they don't really play that shit.
[01:08:22]  And it gets in your head.
[01:08:23]  You become a little insecure.
[01:08:24]  I heard you're supposed to slurp when you eat your neuters.
[01:08:29]  As a sign of respect.
[01:08:32]  As a sign of respect that I appreciate what this chef is doing.
[01:08:39]  Wow.
[01:08:42]  Bro.
[01:08:43]  You know what's crazy is that right now everybody's going to be so sensitive about this shit.
[01:08:47]  And it's really bullshit because every week we're making fun of Indian accent, Asian accent, white accent, black accent.
[01:08:55]  Like every week we do it.
[01:08:57]  But now there's like a heightened sensitivity about it.
[01:09:02]  It's fucking Bersher.
[01:09:10]  Alan, I'm six, so I'm not going to give you five, but that's good.
[01:09:12]  Bros.
[01:09:15]  Bro.
[01:09:17]  It's fucking Bursher.
[01:09:23]  Oh, I almost fell, man.
[01:09:25]  Yo, no, I'm being dead serious.
[01:09:28]  This shit is not cool.
[01:09:30]  Stop fucking cool.
[01:09:34]  Like two weeks ago, dabble, dabble, dabble.
[01:09:36]  Yeah.
[01:09:37]  Not a big deal.
[01:09:39]  Now, if we said neuter, oh, come on, yo, you see how easily people are manipulated to thinking something's wrong?
[01:09:48]  Man, it's just dabble, dabble, neuter.
[01:09:51]  Neuter.
[01:09:52]  You can't help it, man.
[01:09:53]  This is outrageous, Cartridge.
[01:09:54]  You just gotta.
[01:10:00]  What are you gonna do?
[01:10:01]  You know, this is stupid, yo.
[01:10:03]  This is stupid.
[01:10:08]  Oh, man.
[01:10:10]  TK way.
[01:10:14]  TK away.
[01:10:23]  It's just nice to be on the inside of a joke sometimes.
[01:10:31]  Oh, man.
[01:10:31]  Yo, what's there to excuse?
[01:10:33]  You are a fucking wire boy, man.
[01:10:35]  You're wiring right now.
[01:10:37]  You are wiring.
[01:10:38]  What?
[01:10:42]  You are wiring out.
[01:10:47]  Irish, can you get the hold of us?
[01:10:50]  I can't without any of that.
[01:10:52]  Yo, you motherfucking son.
[01:10:54]  Yo, for real.
[01:10:55]  We don't call this shit for regular dude for no reason.
[01:11:02]  Yo, I can't wait till we put this out in Crips.
[01:11:06]  Yo, the IG Crips for this are gonna be written.
[01:11:14]  You know, what's interesting is it we're actually mocking a Mandarin accent.
[01:11:20]  Oh, word?
[01:11:21]  Yeah, we're actually off the Cantonese is a little bit different.
[01:11:24]  Cantonese.
[01:11:27]  I know, it's close to you.
[01:11:32]  I can tried to fucking hold it in the fucking.
[01:11:39]  It was gonna be funny, too.
[01:11:40]  What can you do, man?
[01:11:42]  Son, every once in a while I watch that Scooby-Doo shit at the end of the day.
[01:11:45]  Son, it is so funny.
[01:11:46]  Okay, that's the same week where the Shane Gillis shit comes out.
[01:11:48]  We were in Russia, and I was singing the Scooby-Doo theme song in an Asian accent.
[01:11:55]  Okay, for dropping in.
[01:11:57]  Quarter million people saw it, right?
[01:11:58]  And I'm running around the streets of Russia just going, Scooby-Dooby-Doo.
[01:12:03]  Well, how do I say it?
[01:12:05]  You were like, Scooby-Doo-Doo!
[01:12:18]  And then we're singing it at Russians.
[01:12:21]  We're just screaming it at them.
[01:12:23]  And then they started singing it back to us.
[01:12:25]  It was wild.
[01:12:25]  You can watch it on the show.
[01:12:28]  No smoke.
[01:12:30]  It's a book because it's undeniably funny.
[01:12:32]  You can't say it's not funny.
[01:12:34]  This is the lesson learned here.
[01:12:35]  Be funny.
[01:12:37]  It's beauty of the army, too, man.
[01:12:38]  It's all you have.
[01:12:39]  And it's beauty of the army.
[01:12:40]  It's what we've cultivated, what we've curated.
[01:12:42]  But it's also like if you're funny, everybody completely forgets about whatever you say.
[01:12:48]  Dude, dude, so fucking killing.
[01:12:57]  Fuck.
[01:13:00]  God damn.
[01:13:01]  Dibble dabble, guys.
[01:13:03]  Remember Dibble Dabble, how funny that was?
[01:13:05]  Oh, man.
[01:13:05]  Any Asians upset at this, I bet you didn't.
[01:13:07]  You better not laugh one second when we Dibble Dabble with Akash.
[01:13:11]  No, bro.
[01:13:11]  Yeah, of course.
[01:13:12]  Anybody who upset this, this is the first time they're hearing this episode.
[01:13:16]  Dibble Dabble.
[01:13:19]  Yeah, let's get to sports before you.
[01:13:20]  We got more NFA to talk about.
[01:13:22]  You guys want to do this?
[01:13:25]  Punching my own dick and stuff like that.
[01:13:30]  We got to talk about the NFA.
[01:13:34]  Okay.
[01:13:36]  So wait, don't you.
[01:13:37]  You did the other mid-roll.
[01:13:38]  Silence!
[01:13:41]  I did both.
[01:13:42]  Oh, you did both.
[01:13:43]  Yeah, yeah.
[01:13:43]  Okay.
[01:13:44]  No, but we do have a lot of stories that have come out and things that we need to talk about.
[01:13:48]  And I'm not going to do the accent anymore, even though it feels as if I'm going to do the accent.
[01:13:52]  But I'm not going to do the accent.
[01:13:54]  Are you going to do it?
[01:13:55]  No.
[01:13:56]  Should we promise right here, right now, that we won't do it?
[01:14:00]  Yeah, I think if I promise, that would be a right.
[01:14:03]  But that would be a complete right.
[01:14:06]  But I'll do my best.
[01:14:08]  Let's promise.
[01:14:09]  Okay, I promise.
[01:14:10]  Okay.
[01:14:10]  Sand up?
[01:14:11]  Yep.
[01:14:12]  What's going on?
[01:14:19]  Okay.
[01:14:20]  My honor is in this now.
[01:14:22]  Honestly.
[01:14:24]  I said honestly.
[01:14:26]  I did.
[01:14:26]  I said it regularly.
[01:14:28]  Everybody is like, it's going to be crazy.
[01:14:31]  It's not crazy.
[01:14:32]  Everybody needs to calm down.
[01:14:33]  I think y'all need to calm down.
[01:14:35]  Y'all are crazy.
[01:14:37]  Y'all are the ones that are taking it to the next level when you really think about it.
[01:14:41]  Y'all got all this fucking emergency.
[01:14:42]  Y'all been needing MSG?
[01:14:43]  What's all this energy that y'all got for no reason?
[01:14:49]  Whew.
[01:14:54]  Speaking of MSG, that shit makes anything taste delicious.
[01:14:58]  I didn't realize it.
[01:15:01]  Have you tried MSG before?
[01:15:02]  No.
[01:15:03]  So I didn't realize.
[01:15:04]  There's an actual flavor to it?
[01:15:06]  Yo, my mom's been poisoning me for my entire life, apparently, because she seasons all her food with Sasan.
[01:15:12]  And Sasan has MSG.
[01:15:13]  MSG?
[01:15:14]  That's like the main ingredient in Sasan.
[01:15:17]  So that's the reason why...
[01:15:18]  Spanish food tastes delicious.
[01:15:20]  And what about Chinese food as well?
[01:15:21]  Yeah, that too.
[01:15:22]  Not all Asian foods have it, though.
[01:15:24]  Not Korean.
[01:15:25]  They've been taking it out of some of them, but yeah.
[01:15:27]  But they still maintain flavor.
[01:15:28]  Yeah.
[01:15:29]  That's poisoning me my entire fucking life.
[01:15:32]  MSG is the fucking thing.
[01:15:34]  Yeah.
[01:15:35]  I just found that out.
[01:15:37]  Did you know that, Aka?
[01:15:38]  I did not know.
[01:15:38]  I thought it was only in Chinese food.
[01:15:40]  I didn't know that they put that in Spanish food as well.
[01:15:42]  Saisson.
[01:15:43]  Saisson.
[01:15:44]  Stay away from the Saisson.
[01:15:45]  That's another thing.
[01:15:45]  We've been doing Spanish accents on this show forever, and it's never a big deal.
[01:15:48]  Why are some fucking accents a big deal?
[01:15:51]  It's just because this is hot right now.
[01:15:54]  But I just don't understand it.
[01:15:56]  We should be able to do the whole show.
[01:15:58]  I could do the whole show in an Irish accent, and it's okay.
[01:16:01]  It's not a problem, right?
[01:16:04]  Because I'm white.
[01:16:04]  But if you did the whole show in an Irish accent, that'd be okay.
[01:16:07]  Scottish accent.
[01:16:09]  I can do the whole show in an Irish accent.
[01:16:11]  That's actually pretty good.
[01:16:13]  Holy shit.
[01:16:14]  I'm gay.
[01:16:15]  Do that shit, son.
[01:16:17]  That's all I know how to do.
[01:16:19]  He's about to go to SNL.
[01:16:21]  All right, I'll take it.
[01:16:22]  But if we're like, how you could do it, holy shit.
[01:16:26]  You're not even.
[01:16:27]  But Irish people, poor as fuck.
[01:16:29]  They get in mad turmoil.
[01:16:30]  They got car bombs.
[01:16:30]  They're going through hell over there.
[01:16:32]  Why can't you do that?
[01:16:32]  That's such a weird, arbitrary line.
[01:16:34]  That's the thing.
[01:16:35]  That's why people shouldn't have made it about the fucking.
[01:16:37]  We should do the whole show in only accents today, just to prove a point.
[01:16:41]  You can do fucking accents.
[01:16:43]  We really should have done the whole show.
[01:16:45]  Should we start it over?
[01:16:46]  Nope.
[01:16:49]  Did you do the intro in accent?
[01:16:51]  Did I?
[01:16:51]  You should have.
[01:16:52]  Oh!
[01:16:54]  I think you did.
[01:16:59]  Yo.
[01:17:00]  Yo, son, we made a promise.
[01:17:03]  All right.
[01:17:03]  I'm not doing no more.
[01:17:05]  I'm not doing.
[01:17:07]  Hey, what other topics do we have?
[01:17:09]  Big Ben's career is over.
[01:17:11]  Big Ben's career is over.
[01:17:13]  I think so.
[01:17:13]  You guys see this shit?
[01:17:14]  Yeah.
[01:17:15]  Wild.
[01:17:15]  He's just throwing a pass and doesn't get hit.
[01:17:17]  All of a sudden, he just grabs his right arm, walks off the field.
[01:17:20]  Injuries to his earbone?
[01:17:23]  Stop it.
[01:17:24]  Get out of here.
[01:17:25]  Turn his mic off.
[01:17:27]  Stop.
[01:17:29]  You're not turning mics off, sorry.
[01:17:31]  Fuck you think this is?
[01:17:32]  Go, go, go.
[01:17:34]  It's not a Saturday night, Ryan.
[01:17:38]  We ain't pussy.
[01:17:39]  You promised that.
[01:17:42]  It is something completely like, I don't understand.
[01:17:45]  We got to get an Asian on here to understand it.
[01:17:47]  Like, just explain it to us.
[01:17:48]  It probably triggers because, like you said, a lot of people made shitty Asian jokes their whole life.
[01:17:53]  But to me, I heard a lot of shitty Brown jokes.
[01:17:55]  When I hear a shitty Brown joke, it's like, all right, that's whack, bro.
[01:17:57]  It's just a whack joke.
[01:17:58]  We understand what we're doing is low-hanging fruit.
[01:18:01]  We're aware of that.
[01:18:02]  100%.
[01:18:03]  What kind of fruit?
[01:18:09]  I'm not doing it.
[01:18:10]  It's low-hanging fruit.
[01:18:15]  But purposely, you must understand that.
[01:18:19]  Sometimes it's fun to eat some low-hanging fruit.
[01:18:21]  I'm with you.
[01:18:22]  Bananas?
[01:18:25]  That wasn't even...
[01:18:26]  That was more Jewish.
[01:18:28]  An idea?
[01:18:30]  Or banana?
[01:18:31]  I don't know nothing about it.
[01:18:32]  Let's get back.
[01:18:32]  Let's get back on track.
[01:18:34]  Okay.
[01:18:34]  All right.
[01:18:35]  It feels like we're going to make a fucking joke and we're not going to make a joke.
[01:18:38]  We're saving it.
[01:18:39]  Let's go back to what the fuck we're talking about.
[01:18:41]  Big Ben.
[01:18:42]  Apparently, I think he needs Tommy John surgery, which is not worth it.
[01:18:45]  It's too late.
[01:18:46]  I think they say for football, it's not as bad, but I just don't see you.
[01:18:49]  37.
[01:18:49]  It was a non-contact injury.
[01:18:51]  I just don't see you ever being the same.
[01:18:53]  You go play, but you're not going to be the same.
[01:18:55]  Bro, get out of here.
[01:18:57]  It's over.
[01:18:58]  Get out of here.
[01:18:59]  They got a young quarterback.
[01:19:00]  I forget his name.
[01:19:01]  Who the fuck do they have?
[01:19:02]  They got a young quarterback.
[01:19:03]  He might be all right, though.
[01:19:04]  I think he might end up being all right.
[01:19:05]  He's not going to be Big Ben.
[01:19:06]  Yeah.
[01:19:07]  But I think he'll be all right.
[01:19:08]  Dude, while we're talking about Big Ben, I got a great rape joke, dude, that I thought of.
[01:19:13]  I can't share it on thing because I want to do it.
[01:19:15]  And Big Ben used to rape.
[01:19:18]  What?
[01:19:19]  You didn't know that?
[01:19:19]  He got a couple accusations under his belt.
[01:19:21]  Really?
[01:19:22]  I didn't know about that.
[01:19:23]  He got your axe, bro.
[01:19:24]  He lucky he pre-Weinstein.
[01:19:26]  He BW.
[01:19:27]  He lucky.
[01:19:28]  Can we be honest?
[01:19:30]  Can we be honest?
[01:19:32]  Let's be honest.
[01:19:33]  I think we've been here.
[01:19:33]  Antonio Brown.
[01:19:35]  Is there a better organization at keeping the rape shit quiet than the Pittsburgh Steeler?
[01:19:39]  If anything, they steal it's women's ability to be the victim, to speak back.
[01:19:46]  Because think about it.
[01:19:46]  You didn't hear shit about it.
[01:19:47]  Now Antonio Brown got another one coming up.
[01:19:49]  I think Latina.
[01:19:51]  I think it's the Raiders.
[01:19:52]  They were just salty how he left.
[01:19:53]  And so he's like, oh, word, we just release all your shit.
[01:19:57]  Think about it.
[01:19:59]  Miko would probably agree with that.
[01:20:01]  You should talk to Miko about that.
[01:20:02]  See if she got the inside scoop.
[01:20:04]  She's got that inside screw.
[01:20:06]  It's crazy how all these old shits are just popping up.
[01:20:09]  Right.
[01:20:10]  Yeah.
[01:20:10]  I wonder if that's what it's like.
[01:20:12]  I wonder if it's like, I truly, we should ask a girl who's been raped if it's like, not who's been raped, but who's like been part of the accusation thing?
[01:20:19]  Like, when another girl steps up, do you start to reconsider that moment?
[01:20:26]  In other words, in your mind, are you like, ah, that was just a shitty night?
[01:20:29]  And maybe I put myself in a bad situation.
[01:20:31]  But then when someone speaks up, you're like, oh, fuck.
[01:20:32]  You know what?
[01:20:33]  He did that to me too.
[01:20:34]  Yeah.
[01:20:35]  So like, it's maybe they're not, maybe they're not like gold digging, whatever.
[01:20:40]  Maybe they truly didn't see it in that light.
[01:20:43]  And then when another girl presented a similar situation, she's like, oh, shit, he be doing this.
[01:20:47]  Yo, yeah, you're right.
[01:20:48]  That is fucked up.
[01:20:50]  I think there's some that's suit.
[01:20:51]  Not all of them.
[01:20:52]  Obviously, there's someone's like.
[01:20:53]  You probably deny it to yourself to a certain degree because you don't want to say like, I went through this like or whatever the trauma makes you.
[01:20:58]  This is a random situation.
[01:20:59]  Like, yeah, I'm not making a big deal of this.
[01:21:01]  And then you find out a bunch of people had the exact same thing.
[01:21:04]  You're like, oh, no, this guy got to go.
[01:21:06]  Yeah.
[01:21:06]  This guy.
[01:21:07]  Cosby.
[01:21:08]  I bet you.
[01:21:10]  You don't think.
[01:21:10]  That's a good point.
[01:21:12]  Think about it.
[01:21:12]  I think someone.
[01:21:13]  One or two came forward than fucking 40 more.
[01:21:16]  Yo, because think of it.
[01:21:17]  I think someone tried to drug me, yo.
[01:21:20]  You?
[01:21:20]  I think it's.
[01:21:20]  Yeah.
[01:21:21]  You didn't speak about this on the pod?
[01:21:22]  No, I didn't, but we're not, yeah.
[01:21:23]  We're not drunk.
[01:21:25]  I think someone tried to drug me, bro.
[01:21:27]  I was in LA and I had one drink and I woke up the next day.
[01:21:32]  I did all those podcasts.
[01:21:34]  I was so out of it, B.
[01:21:35]  I was like, my head was killing me.
[01:21:38]  And I was like, does someone try to drug me and have sex with my body?
[01:21:44]  Son, that shit was crazy.
[01:21:48]  Son.
[01:21:49]  This all makes sense now, man.
[01:21:51]  Andrew got raped.
[01:21:52]  So I didn't get raped.
[01:21:54]  So I found the movie, LA.
[01:21:57]  It's all disconnected.
[01:21:59]  Yo, show me your feet, son.
[01:22:02]  So, so, my point.
[01:22:08]  So, my point is, I got one drink, and then I wake up in the morning, excruciating headache for the entire day.
[01:22:13]  That's weird.
[01:22:14]  Anus hurts.
[01:22:14]  Anus was.
[01:22:15]  Nah, my anus was fine, son.
[01:22:18]  I didn't get raped.
[01:22:20]  I slept by myself on my boy's couch.
[01:22:25]  I refused to get a hotel.

=== Andrew Getting Raped (05:18) ===

[01:22:27]  That's what's up.
[01:22:28]  I refuse to get, I don't care how successful I am.
[01:22:30]  I will stay in my boy Dove's couch every time I go to LA.
[01:22:33]  Dove got a great spot.
[01:22:34]  You got to go spot.
[01:22:36]  And I could hang out with my boy.
[01:22:38]  Point is, that could happen with some of these girls.
[01:22:41]  That's what I'm saying.
[01:22:41]  Absolutely.
[01:22:42]  And I think that there's perspective.
[01:22:44]  So, what you think is going to happen with AB?
[01:22:46]  I think AB's good.
[01:22:47]  I think that women really ruined the Me Too movement.
[01:22:50]  And, you know, and it's just, it's just done.
[01:22:54]  I think when it's a second accusation, we start looking at this shit like, oh.
[01:22:59]  Each accusation is an extra level of people being like, oh, we need to look at it.
[01:23:03]  You have details on the second one?
[01:23:04]  I ain't here about what happened with you.
[01:23:05]  You have details, Eden.
[01:23:06]  I know it's going to take you 45 minutes to Google it, but if you could look it up and then let us know before the end of the podcast.
[01:23:11]  Patreon episode.
[01:23:13]  Before the Patreon episode, let us know what happened.
[01:23:15]  You think you could do that?
[01:23:18]  Yo, you know what's mad funny?
[01:23:19]  Do you subtitle the clips?
[01:23:22]  Yeah.
[01:23:23]  Yo, it's mad funny when Eden be misspelling shit or like just choosing a wrong fucking word, like, and but be confident about it.
[01:23:34]  Like, yo, like, there's one.
[01:23:37]  What was the clip?
[01:23:38]  You got the clips from last week?
[01:23:39]  Yeah, probably.
[01:23:40]  It's too far back on my shit.
[01:23:41]  So, like, look.
[01:23:44]  Andrew's that's an annoying ass motherfucker when you're reading out loud in class and then you fuck up one word and he's the asshole to point it out and start laughing at it.
[01:23:51]  I will.
[01:23:52]  Oh, yeah, 100%.
[01:23:53]  100%.
[01:23:54]  I think you should be.
[01:23:55]  I got one clip from last week and you just hold it.
[01:23:59]  No, I like to give Eden a hard time.
[01:24:01]  Yeah.
[01:24:01]  I like it.
[01:24:02]  But which one?
[01:24:03]  I said, coming on your best friend, or I hit you so hard you become a rapist.
[01:24:06]  Hit you so hard and become a rapist.
[01:24:08]  I need to jerk off on someone and you did all of a sudden.
[01:24:13]  Sorry.
[01:24:13]  It's okay.
[01:24:16]  Infuriated.
[01:24:18]  It is a very different thing.
[01:24:20]  It is because jerk off on someone makes it sexual assault all of a sudden.
[01:24:23]  It's just, I'm just getting this out of my system.
[01:24:25]  But what pissed me off was how much he capitalized and big he made sudden.
[01:24:29]  It was like almost like you wanted me to know that you had complete disregard for my jokes.
[01:24:35]  Do you know what I mean?
[01:24:36]  Like, dude, I was, it was unbelievable.
[01:24:42]  I was infuriated.
[01:24:44]  I heard a rich one that is too.
[01:24:46]  I know.
[01:24:47]  It's okay.
[01:24:48]  It's okay.
[01:24:49]  I'm through it.
[01:24:49]  No, it's fine.
[01:24:50]  Why didn't you tell me when?
[01:24:52]  It's fine.
[01:24:53]  So, okay, what else we got?
[01:24:55]  What else we got here?
[01:24:57]  All right.
[01:24:57]  There's a lot.
[01:24:58]  Yo, the Steelers are whack.
[01:25:01]  Odell's watch, we didn't really talk about.
[01:25:02]  I don't know if you care.
[01:25:04]  Do you see the DeMarcus Lawrence video where the little kid in the Giants jersey wanted to autograph and he just walked by him?
[01:25:09]  Yo, I'm not upset about that.
[01:25:11]  That's the greatest shit ever, man.
[01:25:13]  I like, yeah, tell me your thoughts on that.
[01:25:14]  Because so basically, what happened is this little kid is waiting at the entrance to the stupid ass white boy.
[01:25:19]  Yeah.
[01:25:20]  What?
[01:25:22]  Him being white made this worse to me.
[01:25:24]  I don't know why, but it's like, yo, you got on full fucking Giants gear and you're going to ask DeMarcus Lawrence for an autograph?
[01:25:29]  That's it.
[01:25:30]  That's embarrassing.
[01:25:31]  It's like, yeah, first of all, your parents shouldn't even.
[01:25:35]  DeMarcus Lawrence just walks by him, takes a quick glance, and then just goes, you got the wrong jersey on, son.
[01:25:39]  So he's not saying he wouldn't give a kid an autograph.
[01:25:41]  He's just saying, hey, you need to understand what loyalty is to your team.
[01:25:45]  Yeah.
[01:25:45]  And I'm going to teach you why you should like your team.
[01:25:48]  And he kind of apologized later, but his first response was, you know what?
[01:25:50]  That kid's going to hear no a lot in his life.
[01:25:52]  We need to get used to it.
[01:25:53]  I like this.
[01:25:53]  That's the best, dude.
[01:25:55]  I like this kid.
[01:25:56]  Yeah.
[01:25:57]  DeMarcus Lawrence, dude, he's great.
[01:25:59]  And I kind of apologized later.
[01:26:00]  He's like, ah, you know, I just, I was in game mode still, like, whatever.
[01:26:04]  Maybe I'm being a pussy, but it's a kid, man.
[01:26:07]  It's a kid.
[01:26:08]  Yeah, it's fine.
[01:26:09]  He can say no.
[01:26:11]  This guy signs thousands of autographs probably a month.
[01:26:14]  And I'm being like modest right now.
[01:26:15]  I don't.
[01:26:16]  He can say no to something.
[01:26:18]  Yo, it's a kid, though.
[01:26:19]  It's a kid.
[01:26:20]  Yeah, fuck him.
[01:26:21]  The kid, the only reason why he got that jersey on is because his parent got the jersey on.
[01:26:24]  Yo, his parent got the jersey on, bro.
[01:26:26]  Yo, you wearing the jersey, son?
[01:26:28]  Learn a lesson.
[01:26:29]  Learn a lesson.
[01:26:30]  This is what loyalty means.
[01:26:31]  Oh, shit.
[01:26:32]  You should learn a lesson.
[01:26:34]  Yo.
[01:26:38]  You should.
[01:26:38]  I'm just showing y'all how to flip-flop.
[01:26:40]  But go on.
[01:26:41]  Nah, bro, that's a lesson, dog.
[01:26:43]  Yeah, learn a lesson, dog.
[01:26:44]  You gotta be loyal to your team.
[01:26:46]  You got a team or you don't?
[01:26:47]  You can't be out here disroyal.
[01:26:49]  Yo, real talk.
[01:26:51]  It's a kid, man.
[01:26:52]  Who gives a fuck, dog?
[01:26:54]  Kids can learn lessons too.
[01:26:55]  Yeah.
[01:26:55]  They can learn lessons too.
[01:26:58]  What if he would have gained the new fan right there by signing?
[01:27:00]  Who gives a fuck?
[01:27:00]  You don't need fans.
[01:27:01]  He got $100 million.
[01:27:03]  Yo.
[01:27:04]  I need a new fan.
[01:27:05]  I need one, you little fucking eight-year-old fan.
[01:27:07]  I think he wants some fans.
[01:27:08]  Nah, bro, he's good.
[01:27:10]  He could have gained another fan.
[01:27:11]  He could have gained a fan.
[01:27:12]  He could have gained a fan.
[01:27:13]  No, that is.
[01:27:13]  He could have gained a fan.
[01:27:14]  He could have gained a fan.
[01:27:15]  That would have been a good fan.
[01:27:16]  And you know, this kid's going to milk this shit and you're going to get...
[01:27:19]  Saquon Barkley already gave him tickets to a game.
[01:27:21]  He could be fine.
[01:27:22]  He got tickets to a game out there.
[01:27:23]  Yeah, man.
[01:27:23]  This is shit white parents be doing.
[01:27:25]  They be trying to vilify people and then their kid gets a bunch of free shit.
[01:27:28]  Oh, shit.
[01:27:29]  How old do you think he is?
[01:27:31]  Gotta be like eight.
[01:27:32]  He's eight years old.
[01:27:33]  Yeah.
[01:27:34]  He already seen four school shootings.
[01:27:35]  This is the least tragic thing in his life.
[01:27:38]  You know what I mean?
[01:27:39]  This is an eight-year-old American kid.
[01:27:40]  We've seen some severe shit by his age.
[01:27:42]  Yeah.
[01:27:43]  Yeah.
[01:27:43]  Why are we feeling bad for kids?
[01:27:44]  Like, they don't go through way worse stuff in school.

=== Eight Year Old School Shootings (07:06) ===

[01:27:46]  Teacher probably sucked his dick and butt.
[01:27:49]  Do you know what I mean?
[01:27:49]  See, butt and button and butt.
[01:27:52]  Teacher suck his dick and butt school shootings all the damn time and one no autograph and we gotta feel bad for him.
[01:27:57]  This is nothing.
[01:27:58]  That's light work.
[01:27:59]  You were just at a game.
[01:28:00]  That's not enough?
[01:28:01]  Yeah.
[01:28:01]  You can't be happy at a fucking game.
[01:28:03]  Classmates are referred to as they.
[01:28:04]  Yo, bro.
[01:28:06]  They and them and whatever like that.
[01:28:07]  He don't even know who he's fucking talking to no more.
[01:28:09]  You know, he just wants an autograph.
[01:28:12]  Yo, in school, do they have genderless bathrooms?
[01:28:15]  Say what?
[01:28:15]  In school.
[01:28:16]  Do they have genderless bathrooms?
[01:28:17]  Yeah.
[01:28:18]  Like, I would figure that's the first place it would be.
[01:28:20]  I don't even know no more, bro, that this Sam Smith.
[01:28:23]  You heard Sam Smith is no longer a gender?
[01:28:26]  That singer?
[01:28:27]  These motherfuckers hype, dog.
[01:28:29]  They be trying to ride the wave.
[01:28:31]  Yeah, I guess you're right.
[01:28:32]  But you know what's crazy about when you become non-gender?
[01:28:35]  Yeah.
[01:28:35]  You're not gay no more, fam.
[01:28:37]  Oh, yo, you right?
[01:28:38]  You got to be a gender to be gay.
[01:28:41]  You right.
[01:28:42]  Ooh, so guess who's not gay?
[01:28:45]  Welcome back.
[01:28:46]  So that's some kissing that you can tolerate.
[01:28:51]  That's a good point, bro.
[01:28:52]  I didn't think about that one.
[01:28:54]  How do you feel about they kissing?
[01:28:56]  Huh?
[01:28:56]  They kissing.
[01:28:57]  They kissing is, to me, it's what I identify you as.
[01:29:02]  That's what's up.
[01:29:03]  Yeah.
[01:29:03]  So even if I see some like tough Lesbos kissing, I'm kind of like, why those dudes kissing?
[01:29:10]  You know what I mean?
[01:29:11]  Like, come on with all that.
[01:29:12]  These fucking resbians out here doing that shit.
[01:29:16]  Come on, yo.
[01:29:17]  Oh, man.
[01:29:19]  Yo.
[01:29:22]  I got an email from my agent and it said pronoun.
[01:29:25]  Yeah.
[01:29:26]  Her, he, she, or whatever.
[01:29:27]  And I was like, we're doing it.
[01:29:28]  Went all the way here now.
[01:29:30]  What was the pronoun?
[01:29:31]  Her and she or whatever.
[01:29:33]  I'm afraid.
[01:29:34]  It's in the body of her email.
[01:29:35]  You know, people got like their name and their title and their agency, a company, and the phone number and email.
[01:29:41]  Yeah.
[01:29:41]  In the middle of all that is pronouns.
[01:29:42]  And then this is the pronouns you're supposed to refer to me as.
[01:29:45]  What?
[01:29:45]  Is this with Gersh?
[01:29:46]  Nah.
[01:29:47]  Oh.
[01:29:48]  What the fuck?
[01:29:49]  I've never heard of this shit before.
[01:29:51]  Do you have a female agent?
[01:29:52]  Yeah.
[01:29:52]  And she needs.
[01:29:53]  No, well, it's like the assistant or something.
[01:29:55]  Or like, I don't know.
[01:29:55]  I don't know if she's assistant.
[01:29:56]  Son, this is just.
[01:29:58]  Oh, fire that shit.
[01:29:59]  She made it clear she's a female agent, actually.
[01:30:01]  Son, I just don't.
[01:30:03]  I don't get it.
[01:30:03]  We need to have one on so we can understand it.
[01:30:05]  I just don't understand it.
[01:30:06]  How do you feel like nothing?
[01:30:09]  How do you feel like nothing?
[01:30:10]  Do you, what do you feel like?
[01:30:12]  I don't know what I feel like.
[01:30:13]  I can't, I don't, I don't know that I feel inherently male.
[01:30:16]  I don't know.
[01:30:17]  Wait, are you coming out as a bae?
[01:30:19]  No, meaning like I don't believe that you don't feel something because you don't know what it is to feel it.
[01:30:24]  Like you could say you're a dude, you feel like a woman.
[01:30:27]  You don't know what a fucking woman feels like.
[01:30:30]  How the fuck would you know you're not a woman?
[01:30:33]  They're just saying I don't feel like a dude.
[01:30:35]  Yeah.
[01:30:36]  Yo, who feels comfortable in their own skin?
[01:30:38]  This idea that motherfuckers are walking around feeling comfortable in their own skin.
[01:30:41]  That's the most unique shit.
[01:30:43]  That's why when you see a cool motherfucker, you're like, oh my God, is he comfortable in his own skin?
[01:30:47]  Right?
[01:30:48]  That's what makes Tom Cruise Tom Cruise in a movie, right?
[01:30:53]  Maverick is like, holy shit, he's so comfortable in his skin.
[01:30:55]  It's a unique quality.
[01:30:57]  Okay, I get it.
[01:30:58]  Like, being comfortable in your own skin is the rarest shit.
[01:31:01]  So all of us are trannies.
[01:31:04]  Like, what is that everybody say?
[01:31:06]  I feel a little social anxiety.
[01:31:08]  I feel a little anxious.
[01:31:08]  I feel a little uncomfortable.
[01:31:10]  Like, nobody's just walking around feeling comfortable.
[01:31:12]  Superheroes.
[01:31:13]  And even they have an origin story that makes them feel all weird and shit.
[01:31:17]  So this.
[01:31:18]  So we have this expectation.
[01:31:19]  Like, if you're not comfortable in your skin, you must be something else.
[01:31:23]  No, you're just a person.
[01:31:25]  That's life.
[01:31:27]  Right?
[01:31:27]  Not everybody's going to be Will Smith.
[01:31:30]  I'm not arguing.
[01:31:31]  That was good.
[01:31:32]  I'm just saying, right?
[01:31:33]  It's not.
[01:31:33]  I don't cut off that.
[01:31:34]  We got this crazy.
[01:31:36]  We have this crazy high.
[01:31:38]  We have this crazy high bar set for like what it is to be a human.
[01:31:42]  And since we all don't meet it, we just check all these boxes about what's wrong with us.
[01:31:46]  I'm sad.
[01:31:46]  I'm depressed.
[01:31:47]  I'm lonely.
[01:31:47]  I'm anxious.
[01:31:48]  It's like, no, that's what a person is.
[01:31:50]  You feel all these fucking things on a regular basis and you try to manage them to the best of your ability and hope that at the end of the year, you came out a little bit in the fucking black.
[01:32:02]  Most people are in the red, but you hope you come out in the black and that's success.
[01:32:07]  Who throughout life, throughout the 5,000 years?
[01:32:10]  I mean, your people have been around longer than everybody.
[01:32:12]  Have you ever heard any of them write, oh yeah, my whole life was blissful?
[01:32:15]  Never.
[01:32:16]  Has anybody throughout history read my whole life was perfect easily?
[01:32:19]  Piece of cake was amazing.
[01:32:22]  Yeah, you're right.
[01:32:23]  We're taking pills.
[01:32:25]  Housewives are taking Prozac so they can feel good every day.
[01:32:28]  Who the fuck told you you're allowed to feel good every day?
[01:32:33]  Every day?
[01:32:35]  We need to cue that Kanye gospel music right now.
[01:32:38]  See, he preach it out here.
[01:32:40]  I mean, am I on to something?
[01:32:42]  Yeah, to that point, though, people lost religion.
[01:32:43]  So now they're just like, oh, I should always be happy.
[01:32:45]  The whole point, religion always tells you you're not always happy.
[01:32:48]  Every religion tells you you're not always happy.
[01:32:49]  Who the fuck do you think this is?
[01:32:51]  And you should be grateful that you're not because that's how you can experience happiness.
[01:32:55]  You're happy every day.
[01:32:56]  You know what you'd be?
[01:32:58]  Normal.
[01:32:59]  Yep.
[01:33:00]  Thank God you feel shitty because you get to feel great.
[01:33:04]  Thank God you feel heartbreak because you get to feel love.
[01:33:07]  But trying to fill the void that we used to have God filled with with 68 genders.
[01:33:12]  Son.
[01:33:14]  You know what gets me?
[01:33:15]  Is how you look at a list of 62 genders and be like, nah, none of these.
[01:33:19]  I'm this.
[01:33:23]  Like they made it so easy for you to be one.
[01:33:26]  Yeah, bro.
[01:33:27]  They made it so easy.
[01:33:28]  It's choice paralysis at this point.
[01:33:30]  Do you know what it is?
[01:33:30]  It's that machine where you can make your own type of Coke.
[01:33:33]  Yeah.
[01:33:33]  You know, it's like lime Coke, lemon Coke, vanilla Coke, cherry Coke.
[01:33:36]  And you look at it like, that's not the fruit I want in my Coke.
[01:33:40]  Yeah.
[01:33:40]  Bro, it's enough.
[01:33:41]  Who the fuck are you?
[01:33:42]  To be the 63rd gender.
[01:33:44]  Are you what?
[01:33:45]  And what would that mean?
[01:33:46]  What does it mean?
[01:33:49]  I need to talk to somebody.
[01:33:50]  And it's not coming from a hateful place at all.
[01:33:52]  It's truly coming from understanding.
[01:33:56]  Please help me understand.
[01:33:59]  Because I don't.
[01:34:01]  I just don't.
[01:34:05]  I get anxious when I change my hairstyle.
[01:34:08]  Imagine cutting your fucking cock off your bunch.
[01:34:12]  You know, when you try a brand new hairstyle, you're like, oh my God, I'm like, oh, I'm going to like this.
[01:34:16]  And you only got to wait two weeks and it comes back.
[01:34:18]  But there's like nerves going through that.
[01:34:21]  They got to be feeling some real shit to cut that thing right the fuck off.
[01:34:24]  They got to be feeling some real shit.
[01:34:27]  But you got to be secure.
[01:34:30]  You got to be positive.
[01:34:32]  You don't want your dick.
[01:34:33]  Let's put it out there.
[01:34:34]  If any assholes that identify as one of those other things.
[01:34:39]  I'm talking about like the 60th gender.
[01:34:41]  I'm trying to work on a bit about sexual.
[01:34:43]  If you identify as like an octopus or something like that, just hit us up in the DMs and come on the show.
[01:34:48]  Call in.
[01:34:49]  Call in.
[01:34:49]  Call in for sure.
[01:34:50]  Because he probably got mental illness.
[01:34:51]  So let's call in.

=== Reincarnation and Gender (03:22) ===

[01:34:53]  Damn.
[01:34:56]  We're really going for it.
[01:34:57]  I know.
[01:34:59]  We're really going for it today.
[01:35:02]  Yo, that's what Shane should have said.
[01:35:04]  He should have said, I identify as Chinese.
[01:35:06]  Yo, that would have been fucking.
[01:35:08]  You guys been saying that.
[01:35:09]  Whenever you just start getting to backlash, just identify as that thing.
[01:35:12]  You got to identify as it.
[01:35:14]  I said this before.
[01:35:14]  That's why I keep saying I'm gay.
[01:35:16]  Smart.
[01:35:16]  They can't say nothing.
[01:35:17]  But I'm out ahead of it.
[01:35:18]  Son, you fuck one girl in your life.
[01:35:20]  If that ain't the gayest shit ever seen in my entire life.
[01:35:22]  I know gay dudes fuck more women than me.
[01:35:24]  Facts.
[01:35:24]  Mad gay.
[01:35:25]  Most of them.
[01:35:26]  Yo.
[01:35:27]  Most gay dudes fuck more girls than you.
[01:35:29]  I'm gay or who's really gay.
[01:35:32]  Yeah.
[01:35:32]  They're out here slaying puss.
[01:35:35]  And you out here with one vagina on your fucking record.
[01:35:38]  Gay.
[01:35:39]  That's gay, bro.
[01:35:40]  The gayest.
[01:35:41]  Super gay.
[01:35:42]  Arcash is the gayest.
[01:35:43]  I'm the gayest dude out here.
[01:35:45]  Concerned about his weight.
[01:35:49]  All the time concerned about his fucking weight.
[01:35:52]  Manicured ass beard.
[01:35:53]  Word.
[01:35:54]  White teeth as fuck.
[01:35:55]  You stay, manicure.
[01:35:57]  You stay, manicure.
[01:35:58]  Got a nice watch.
[01:35:59]  Bro, I'm gay, son.
[01:36:00]  I don't know how many times I got telling you.
[01:36:01]  Pretty ass eyes get cum filled in.
[01:36:04]  Whoa.
[01:36:09]  Son, I had a bar on Brilliant Idiots.
[01:36:11]  We take Brilliant Idiots today, son.
[01:36:13]  I really had a bar on Brilliant Idiots, bro.
[01:36:15]  I think I figured out reincarnation, bro.
[01:36:19]  Hit it.
[01:36:19]  I figured out reincarnation.
[01:36:21]  Hit it.
[01:36:21]  Didn't you have this thing?
[01:36:22]  Ready?
[01:36:23]  Here it is.
[01:36:23]  This is reincarnation.
[01:36:24]  You ready?
[01:36:25]  I'm ready.
[01:36:25]  Okay.
[01:36:26]  You know how when people die, they say, I'm going to see the light.
[01:36:30]  I see the light.
[01:36:32]  You die, you see the light.
[01:36:33]  Right?
[01:36:34]  Maybe that's not the light.
[01:36:36]  Maybe that's you back inside all the sperm being busted out of a dick into an egg again.
[01:36:44]  But then how you get back?
[01:36:46]  Say what?
[01:36:46]  How you come?
[01:36:47]  They come back to life sometimes.
[01:36:49]  I saw the light.
[01:36:50]  I came back to life.
[01:36:51]  You didn't make it today.
[01:36:52]  It wasn't your time.
[01:36:53]  Not all the sperm make it.
[01:36:55]  The vast majority die.
[01:36:57]  All of them.
[01:36:58]  Like 99.999%.
[01:37:00]  All of them die.
[01:37:00]  Why don't we have that many near-death experiences?
[01:37:02]  No, no.
[01:37:03]  What I'm saying is you die in real life.
[01:37:05]  You see the light.
[01:37:06]  You're just inside the sperm.
[01:37:08]  You are part of the nut.
[01:37:10]  You're part of that white.
[01:37:11]  It's valid.
[01:37:12]  I mean, I can't disprove it.
[01:37:13]  And it goes with reincarnation.
[01:37:14]  It goes with y'all.
[01:37:15]  Yeah.
[01:37:16]  And then when some people come back as like an animal or whatever like that, it stays true.
[01:37:20]  Animals fuck each other.
[01:37:21]  There's nut.
[01:37:22]  Yeah.
[01:37:23]  Tell me I didn't just figure out reincarnation.
[01:37:30]  What happens when they see the light and come back to life?
[01:37:33]  That's why they got in the nut and then came back to the person.
[01:37:36]  I don't know.
[01:37:37]  Not all the sperm make it to the egg, fam.
[01:37:39]  Yeah, but then how do they jump back in the person if they were in the sperm?
[01:37:43]  You ever bust a nut and then like a few minutes later, some cum leaks out of your dick?
[01:37:50]  Okay.
[01:37:50]  Yes.
[01:37:51]  That's them.
[01:37:53]  That's the ones that didn't swim.
[01:37:55]  That's the one they saw the light and they're like, I'm out.
[01:37:58]  And then they just die.
[01:37:59]  I'm trying, but you got to explain that one.
[01:38:03]  Saw the light.
[01:38:03]  This is the theory really falls apart here, but the initial part is like, the initial part, I get it.
[01:38:08]  Saw the light.
[01:38:09]  Also, again, 99.9% of sperm doesn't make it, and there's not that many near-death experiences.

=== Tyson Fury Boxing Fight (15:27) ===

[01:38:15]  That's what I'm saying.
[01:38:16]  100% though.
[01:38:17]  How you know how many insects are?
[01:38:18]  Oh, fuck.
[01:38:19]  How many mosquitoes die?
[01:38:21]  How many all these little things die?
[01:38:22]  Tons of little shit dies.
[01:38:24]  Yeah, but they don't make it.
[01:38:24]  Those guys all made it.
[01:38:26]  What?
[01:38:34]  Oh, man.
[01:38:35]  I don't know, man.
[01:38:36]  I'm just trying.
[01:38:37]  I think I figured out the beginning.
[01:38:38]  I didn't think about the end of the damage.
[01:38:40]  But whatever.
[01:38:41]  The point told you.
[01:38:43]  All right, let's talk about some sports.
[01:38:46]  You want to talk about Drew Breeze or not?
[01:38:49]  What else have we got, man?
[01:38:50]  Tyson Fury fight.
[01:38:51]  Oh, you watched it.
[01:38:52]  Yep.
[01:38:53]  Okay, so Tyson Fury fight.
[01:38:55]  He fought this guy named Otto Wallen who did a he did an amazing admirable man.
[01:39:02]  Yeah, I thought he fought a great fight.
[01:39:04]  He did a little cheap shit where he tried to like poke the cut that he made.
[01:39:07]  Yeah, so in like the third round, he lands a left hook on Tyson Fury's like right above his eye eyebrow and immediately starts bleeding heavily.
[01:39:15]  Opens up bad.
[01:39:16]  So pussy lips, bro.
[01:39:20]  So the fight at this point.
[01:39:22]  Look at the gash, dude.
[01:39:23]  It's like day three of a period.
[01:39:24]  Look if you get a good version of the gash, just fucking labia flopping around.
[01:39:31]  Look at that thing.
[01:39:32]  Oh, yeah.
[01:39:34]  Oh, yeah.
[01:39:35]  Yo.
[01:39:37]  Yo, you're not wrong.
[01:39:38]  It looked like a pull out of a girl when you're fucking on a period.
[01:39:41]  That's what that shit looks like.
[01:39:46]  Anyway, go on.
[01:39:48]  So this fight, it just becomes Otto Wallen.
[01:39:50]  Otto Vollin's only chance to win is this fight.
[01:39:52]  This cut gets so bad that they stop the fight.
[01:39:55]  Because it's caused by a punch.
[01:39:56]  And if a cut is caused by a punch, it's considered a TKO.
[01:39:59]  If it's caused by a headbutt, then it's a no decision.
[01:40:02]  Right.
[01:40:02]  So this could be.
[01:40:03]  This is his only opening to win.
[01:40:05]  So he keeps just trying to go at the eye.
[01:40:06]  And Tyson Fury is definitely a better boxer than this guy.
[01:40:09]  And as the fight goes on, Otto Vollin completely runs out of gas.
[01:40:13]  But now it's just this cool little chess match of Tyson Fury trying to knock this guy out because he knows he doesn't have much time left before this cut gets really bad and they call the fight.
[01:40:21]  And you see Tyson pushing.
[01:40:23]  Tyson is and so Tyson is going at him.
[01:40:25]  And like he'll throw a few punches, wipe blood from his eye.
[01:40:28]  There's blood everywhere.
[01:40:30]  There's a shot of the referee who keeps trying to like so Tyson will throw some punches and then try to try to wrap up because he can't get hit in the eye.
[01:40:36]  And when he's wrapped up, Otto Volland will just keep trying to throw little hooks in there.
[01:40:39]  Now, Wallen did do some ill shit after like the fourth round or fifth round.
[01:40:43]  After the round, he like poked Tyson Fury's eye to try to like make the cut worse.
[01:40:49]  But other than that, he fought a great fight, man.
[01:40:51]  Other than that, it was really admirable.
[01:40:52]  Yeah, it's interesting when you see Tyson Fury against another heavyweight, the heavyweight that he's in there with looks so tiny because Tyson Fury is 6'9.
[01:41:01]  Yeah.
[01:41:02]  Which is a massive, he's a massive fucking guy.
[01:41:05]  And he can move.
[01:41:05]  And he can move.
[01:41:06]  He's like the shack of boxing.
[01:41:07]  Really?
[01:41:08]  Like, he could play basketball.
[01:41:09]  I'm shocked that he didn't play basketball because he has that kind of agility.
[01:41:14]  But Otto Wallen looked incredibly tiny.
[01:41:16]  He's probably 6'4 ⁇ .
[01:41:18]  Yeah.
[01:41:18]  Right?
[01:41:18]  6'5, like over 200 pounds, easy.
[01:41:21]  He's a physical guy, but next to him, he looks minuscule.
[01:41:25]  And I thought he fought a good ride.
[01:41:26]  I think he actually has a future in boxing.
[01:41:29]  Yeah, I think he just ran out of gas in like the sixth round.
[01:41:31]  And he wasn't skilled enough to beat Fury, but Fury's the best in the business right now.
[01:41:36]  I think that Wallen can be really effective against some of the lesser guys in the division.
[01:41:42]  Like, I'll be honest, a great fight might be Wallen versus Andy Ruiz.
[01:41:47]  Both throw a lot of punches, both counter-punch really well.
[01:41:51]  They engage.
[01:41:51]  Ruiz isn't that hard a puncher.
[01:41:53]  He's fast, but he's not that hard a puncher.
[01:41:55]  Wallen isn't that hard a puncher, but he counterpunches well.
[01:41:57]  I think that fight is fun.
[01:41:59]  When is that rematch?
[01:42:01]  Is Joshua?
[01:42:02]  Is it going to be in Saudi Arabia?
[01:42:03]  And I'm not exactly sure when I'll get that.
[01:42:06]  I'll get that date.
[01:42:07]  But what's actually good about Tyson Fury fighting these guys?
[01:42:13]  And I know everybody's like, just fight Wilder again.
[01:42:16]  And they're going to fight again if Wilder gets by Ortiz.
[01:42:19]  But what it does is it promotes other fighters in the heavyweight division.
[01:42:24]  And if they come to fight, now we have some more people we're kind of interested in in the heavyweight division.
[01:42:30]  This guy's kind of interesting.
[01:42:31]  If he fights another name, I'll watch.
[01:42:34]  Yeah.
[01:42:35]  He showed some balls.
[01:42:36]  Yeah.
[01:42:36]  You know?
[01:42:37]  But it was cool to see Tyson Fury have like intensity and like purpose.
[01:42:46]  Yeah.
[01:42:46]  Does he normally not fight like that?
[01:42:48]  No, he does, but he can dance and he can move around.
[01:42:51]  But this was like, oh, shit.
[01:42:52]  A sense of urgency.
[01:42:53]  There was urgency.
[01:42:54]  Yeah.
[01:42:55]  I need to get this guy out of here.
[01:42:56]  Yeah.
[01:42:56]  I need to finish this guy.
[01:42:58]  And he was fucking going for it.
[01:42:59]  Yeah.
[01:42:59]  And he was swinging way more.
[01:43:02]  He's usually kind of like a slick boxer.
[01:43:03]  Yeah.
[01:43:04]  And this one, he was going for it.
[01:43:05]  And yeah, I love it.
[01:43:07]  He's had two exciting fights outside of Wilder where he fought no-name guys, but he made news with them.
[01:43:15]  Yeah.
[01:43:16]  And like specifically targeted fans.
[01:43:18]  Like he came into the room, came to the ring.
[01:43:21]  Wearing a sombrero.
[01:43:23]  It was Mexican Independence Day.
[01:43:25]  Apparently somebody else backed out of a fight and he was supposed to fight three weeks later and he said, I'll fight on Mexican Independence Day.
[01:43:30]  Because he knows he, the last fight, how'd he come in the ring?
[01:43:33]  American, Apollo Creed.
[01:43:35]  Yep.
[01:43:35]  And now he comes into the ring.
[01:43:37]  He's going after the biggest fans in boxing.
[01:43:40]  And he said, call me L D instead of the Gypsy King.
[01:43:43]  Is he a Gypsy for real?
[01:43:44]  Yeah.
[01:43:44]  That's wild, dog.
[01:43:46]  He's got a caravan in his back where they just drive off and do some shit.
[01:43:51]  It's like part of his culture.
[01:43:52]  He like reps the culture heavy, but he's also like English and acknowledges that that's who he is and what he represents as well.
[01:43:59]  But they call himself travelers.
[01:44:00]  Gypsy's like a bad term, I guess.
[01:44:03]  He calls himself the Gypsy King, though.
[01:44:04]  Right.
[01:44:04]  So he's like, I can call myself that.
[01:44:06]  Oh, okay.
[01:44:06]  And he's like, you guys can say it, but don't call a gypsy a gypsy.
[01:44:10]  Call them a traveler.
[01:44:12]  But this is just some like, everybody needs their derogatory term that they can be offended by.
[01:44:18]  Yeah.
[01:44:18]  But good fight, man.
[01:44:20]  And I don't normally like get super into boxing because I don't get a lot of it at a high level.
[01:44:24]  But it was just fun to watch that little chess master.
[01:44:26]  He got to finish this guy off.
[01:44:27]  Yeah.
[01:44:27]  And he going for it.
[01:44:28]  And this guy got nothing left, but he's just swinging however he can at the end.
[01:44:32]  And then in the last round, he almost knocked Fury out.
[01:44:35]  Did you watch the last round?
[01:44:36]  I did, but I didn't, I didn't see it.
[01:44:37]  Yo, he landed some punches on Fury.
[01:44:39]  Fury was shaking.
[01:44:40]  Fury wasn't really throwing.
[01:44:41]  Like, it got a little exciting at the end.
[01:44:44]  Like, he might do this.
[01:44:45]  Get out of here.
[01:44:46]  I'm not lying.
[01:44:46]  That was easy victory for Fury.
[01:44:48]  He definitely won.
[01:44:49]  After about the fifth, fourth round, Fury won every round.
[01:44:52]  Maybe the last one, I think, Vollin won.
[01:44:53]  But then every other round went to Fury.
[01:44:55]  Interesting.
[01:44:56]  All right.
[01:44:57]  There was a good MMA fight.
[01:44:58]  Did you see Gacey versus Cowboy Seroni?
[01:45:00]  I did not.
[01:45:01]  So this kid, Justin Gaetchy, they call him the most violent man in the MMA.
[01:45:07]  And it's a violent sport.
[01:45:08]  Right.
[01:45:09]  And he just has a ferocious style, man.
[01:45:12]  He comes straight in, wants to connect, wants to fight.
[01:45:16]  And it was really interesting because they're friends outside the ring.
[01:45:20]  And they had this beautiful moment after it.
[01:45:21]  Gaetchy knocked him out.
[01:45:23]  And right here in this picture, he's pointing at the ref and he says, fuck you to the ref because Cerrone was out.
[01:45:29]  He was on the ground, but he was pretty much out.
[01:45:31]  But the ref didn't stop the fight.
[01:45:32]  So he's like, he's looking at the ref like, stop the.
[01:45:35]  So he has to punch his friend more times in the head after he's already been concussed.
[01:45:41]  So he's like, fuck you.
[01:45:43]  Do your fucking job.
[01:45:44]  The guy's face first.
[01:45:46]  That's kind of dope.
[01:45:47]  It's dope.
[01:45:48]  But afterwards, dude, they had this really cool moment where Cowboy, he's older, and he was like, you know, this kid's a great kid.
[01:45:55]  And like, you know, the roof is yours.
[01:45:57]  Go for it.
[01:45:58]  This, that, the other.
[01:45:59]  They were like, really.
[01:46:01]  They had, I don't know, they had this great kind of connection.
[01:46:03]  It was, it was fucking awesome to see two guys go in there, give it their all to knock each other out, and then afterwards, like, just be supportive.
[01:46:10]  Yeah.
[01:46:10]  It's like, no ego.
[01:46:11]  Yeah.
[01:46:13]  And it'd be really cool to see this kid right here fight Connor McGregor.
[01:46:19]  That's the fight I want to see.
[01:46:21]  Why is that?
[01:46:21]  Because this kid is not going to wrestle Connor.
[01:46:25]  Connor is boring when you watch him against wrestlers.
[01:46:27]  Yeah.
[01:46:28]  And they're just going to throw blows.
[01:46:29]  And this kid can knock you out with one punch, and Connor can knock you out with one punch.
[01:46:33]  And one of them is going to land.
[01:46:35]  And then when they land, it's going to be night night.
[01:46:38]  Is Connor done?
[01:46:40]  He might be, might not be.
[01:46:42]  It's like he's planning a comeback.
[01:46:43]  Then he breaks his foot.
[01:46:45]  He punches an old man.
[01:46:46]  He punches an old man the fucking head.
[01:46:48]  Like there's messed up shit.
[01:46:50]  But I'm interested in seeing that fight because just as a boxing fan, it's like they're going to kick a little and they're going to throw hands.
[01:46:57]  Ain't going to be no wrestling.
[01:46:59]  Ain't going to be no like jujitsu.
[01:47:02]  It's just, let's throw haymakers and see who fucking connects.
[01:47:05]  It's almost like bare knuckle boxing.
[01:47:07]  Yes.
[01:47:08]  Almost.
[01:47:08]  Yes.
[01:47:09]  Bare knuckles, a little brutal, but yes.
[01:47:10]  Yeah.
[01:47:11]  It's a little less brutal.
[01:47:12]  Yeah.
[01:47:13]  So it'd be cool.
[01:47:14]  It'd be cool to see.
[01:47:15]  There's some interesting fights.
[01:47:17]  How big do you think this guy can be?
[01:47:19]  I don't know.
[01:47:20]  We'll see if his personality carries him.
[01:47:21]  At the end of the day, it's personality.
[01:47:23]  Yeah.
[01:47:23]  Right.
[01:47:23]  It's like I was doing this guy, Logan Paul's podcast.
[01:47:27]  I'm just going to talk about it.
[01:47:28]  Oh, yeah.
[01:47:30]  So Logan Paul has this fight coming up against KSI.
[01:47:33]  And they boxed one before?
[01:47:35]  I think it's not.
[01:47:35]  I think it happened already.
[01:47:36]  No, November.
[01:47:36]  They just had the press conference for it.
[01:47:39]  And they and they basically have this, they have this fight, and it really proves that fighting is not about skill.
[01:47:50]  It's about story.
[01:47:51]  Yeah.
[01:47:52]  And they both had the platforms to sell their own stories.
[01:47:55]  Right.
[01:47:55]  So they sold the beef and they packed out an arena.
[01:47:58]  Now they're doing the Staple Center.
[01:47:59]  That's wild, dude.
[01:48:01]  Keep in mind, the Staple Center is bigger than where Tyson Fury just fought, probably.
[01:48:05]  That's so wild.
[01:48:06]  It is a massive gate.
[01:48:08]  Yeah.
[01:48:09]  So here they are fighting.
[01:48:11]  I think I imagine they just stream it on YouTube or some shit like that.
[01:48:14]  Yeah, YouTube or pay-per-view YouTube.
[01:48:16]  It's pay-per-view YouTube, but it's smart because all your fans are already on pay-per-view.
[01:48:20]  They're invested in your life so much because you're YouTube.
[01:48:23]  So they're going to want to see you fight and you just create the highest stakes.
[01:48:27]  And it's genius.
[01:48:29]  It's like fighting is a way that we want to see disputes settled.
[01:48:32]  It's like vendettas at the end of the day.
[01:48:35]  You have a beef?
[01:48:36]  Well, let's settle it.
[01:48:37]  And you can't talk shit afterwards.
[01:48:40]  Yep.
[01:48:41]  But it just goes to show you don't need the skill.
[01:48:44]  You need the story.
[01:48:45]  And they're fucking selling the story.
[01:48:47]  God damn.
[01:48:48]  So who are you going to fight, Akash?
[01:48:50]  Who are we going to have you go up against?
[01:48:51]  Son, you got to give me somebody Lil.
[01:48:53]  Who are you going to fight?
[01:48:56]  Mr. Utah.
[01:48:57]  Give me like a Z's.
[01:48:58]  That's interesting.
[01:48:59]  You know, I sparred for the first time in a while the other day.
[01:49:02]  Yeah.
[01:49:03]  And I, we weren't going to the head because I didn't have headgear, but I was like at this kickboxing class, and it was for the first time I was, I was like experiencing what sparring was with kicks as well.
[01:49:16]  And I got caught a few times, but I was actually able to use the kicks a little bit too.
[01:49:22]  And it was, I remember it's so weird.
[01:49:25]  It's like when you're doing stuff on the bag or the pads, you know, you're like trying to be calculated.
[01:49:31]  But there is a switch that I have that like, dude, it's hard to describe, but like I was kind of in my comfort zone again.
[01:49:41]  Like I remember fighting.
[01:49:42]  And like I remembered being in there and like what's the switch?
[01:49:47]  It's not a switch of like primal aggression.
[01:49:50]  I was kind of smiling.
[01:49:52]  Like I'd get touched and I'd be like, all right, that was good.
[01:49:55]  I was able to kind of stalk a little bit.
[01:49:57]  And granted, we're not going to face.
[01:49:58]  So I literally have to block my body and I can block my body just like with the Philly shell a little bit and like catch punches, et cetera.
[01:50:06]  But like I was able to, you know, get the jab, pump the jab out there, work the body a little bit, and then land a couple of, you know, kicks.
[01:50:12]  But I remember the first time I sparred and the sheer terror that I experienced.
[01:50:19]  And then over the over the years, like slowly developing a comfort and an understanding.
[01:50:27]  And like, no matter how hard someone punches when they hit the bag and they hit the pads, when they're sparring, it's a different game.
[01:50:35]  Yeah.
[01:50:36]  The bag don't hit back and neither do the pads.
[01:50:39]  Right.
[01:50:39]  When something's in front of you and it hits back, it changes you for most people.
[01:50:46]  It changes you.
[01:50:46]  Your footing is off.
[01:50:47]  When your footing's off, you can't really turn on your punches.
[01:50:50]  It's not as much power.
[01:50:51]  It's a whole different game.
[01:50:53]  And yeah, it was just, it was fascinating to be back in that.
[01:50:57]  I don't think it's healthy.
[01:50:58]  I don't want to make a habit of it.
[01:50:59]  I think getting hit in the head sucks, especially.
[01:51:00]  I've had enough concussions.
[01:51:02]  I don't want to do too much of it.
[01:51:04]  But it is fun every once in a while to be in the highest stakes that you can.
[01:51:09]  You know, it's, it's, um, one of the great things about jiu-jitsu, Ronnie Chang comedian, pointed this out to me.
[01:51:15]  He goes, one of the great things about jiu-jitsu is it's one of the few things in life where you can go your hardest stat and not hurt somebody.
[01:51:27]  Like fight sports.
[01:51:28]  Like I can't go my hardest boxing you and either you not hurt me or me not hurt you.
[01:51:33]  We're going to get hurt.
[01:51:34]  But with jiu-jitsu, you can go your hardest to get them in a position.
[01:51:37]  And the second they're about to tap, you let go.
[01:51:41]  But you actually get to put full effort.
[01:51:45]  And it's really unique that way.
[01:51:50]  Name a fight sport where you get to do full, maybe wrestling, but even wrestling doesn't have stakes in terms of breaking a bone or breaking a ligament.
[01:51:58]  Yeah.
[01:51:59]  Yeah.
[01:52:00]  That makes perfect sense.
[01:52:01]  You know?
[01:52:02]  But yeah, it's a thing, man.
[01:52:05]  We should all, we should all get in, like, we should all take a kickboxing class.
[01:52:08]  I'm with it.
[01:52:08]  Or something like that.
[01:52:10]  Dude, it's, and even just like, dude, even just after we take a few months of the class, I work out this place called Tiger Schulman's.
[01:52:16]  Great, great gym, like really cool people that work there.
[01:52:19]  And, and, um, even just feeling what it's like to just kind of like, and I'll work with you guys, like, just feeling what it's like to kind of like throw, throw punches and have punches thrown at you, it's a different world.
[01:52:32]  Yeah.
[01:52:32]  It's a completely different, like when you see street fights, you just see these guys swinging these big punches.
[01:52:38]  That's because they don't think they're going to get knocked out.
[01:52:40]  Right.
[01:52:41]  You throw a lot differently when you think you could get caught.
[01:52:44]  Yeah.
[01:52:45]  You know what I mean?
[01:52:45]  Like, the drunk punch is when you're drunk.
[01:52:47]  Right.
[01:52:48]  When you're sober, you're like, all right, what's he throwing?
[01:52:50]  Yeah.
[01:52:51]  You know, what are we working with here?
[01:52:52]  Right.
[01:52:53]  I don't know, Al, did you feel that at all when you were doing karate and shit?
[01:52:57]  I would.
[01:52:58]  It's almost like I left my body when I was being sparred.
[01:53:02]  Like, I remember there was like one tournament actually that it kind of felt that I was looking at myself fighting.
[01:53:07]  It was fucking insane.
[01:53:09]  Son.
[01:53:09]  It was kind of weird.
[01:53:10]  I remember one.
[01:53:11]  What do you mean, though?
[01:53:12]  Yeah.
[01:53:12]  Like, I don't know.
[01:53:13]  I just used to.
[01:53:16]  It just used to be so instinctive.
[01:53:18]  Yeah.
[01:53:18]  Son, it is.
[01:53:20]  Son, it is crazy.
[01:53:21]  And that's what I was shocked.
[01:53:23]  I haven't done this for 12 years or 13 years where I haven't like sparred, right?
[01:53:26]  And this wasn't even heavy spark.
[01:53:27]  But like, I was shocked at the instincts kick in.
[01:53:31]  There was a moment where a guy threw a kick and I didn't tell myself to catch the kick, but I just lifted my leg and caught the kick.
[01:53:38]  Like, but that's instinct.
[01:53:40]  And I haven't even been working that that much to catch it.

=== Instinctive Boxing Moves (02:54) ===

[01:53:42]  And I remember back when I was boxing, this is when I started to realize, and it does kick in.
[01:53:46]  I was back when I was boxing this a long time ago.
[01:53:50]  We were at a house party and someone threw a cup at me, right?
[01:53:58]  And the cup was flying and I saw the cup flying and I swear to God, I know this sounds crazy.
[01:54:03]  I saw it in slow motion and I just slipped my head to the side and the cup went over my shoulder.
[01:54:10]  And it's only because I'd been in the gym constantly in the ring, seeing guys throw punches and like being used to fast things coming at me and just like, because remember, to miss a punch, this is what people don't realize.
[01:54:23]  Your fist is small.
[01:54:25]  To miss a punch, you're literally moving your head two inches and you don't come close to me.
[01:54:31]  The fear is if I don't get my head away two inches.
[01:54:35]  The genius of Floyd is I will stay right in front of you and I'll move my head this far and then you won't be able to touch me.
[01:54:42]  Another thing is funny, it's like uh, we travel with Mark and Mark has never fought, never sparred, and you can actually tell because like when we scare him, his it's not like defenses go up, he just like crumbles.
[01:54:56]  It's like you know, yeah, and he's an athlete, yeah, like he comes, he presents as athletic, but it's a different, yeah, it's a different level of like me.
[01:55:08]  My first instinct is hands up for defense, and like I'm like just ready for whatever's coming.
[01:55:13]  Yeah, it's just different, and that's all instinctive.
[01:55:16]  It's like your posture is karate-based, yeah, my posture is boxing-based, and kickboxing is even different.
[01:55:22]  Like the second I'm like, Joe, like moving around with somebody, I don't square up my body, I make my body quite-I guess this would be how would you describe that?
[01:55:32]  Perpendicular perpendicular, yeah, right?
[01:55:34]  Because in boxing, smallest target, smallest target, right?
[01:55:37]  But in kickboxing, that's a disadvantage because once I have my body perpendicular, you can kick my back leg out, right?
[01:55:45]  And to get this leg all the way over to you, right?
[01:55:48]  You know what I mean?
[01:55:49]  It's different, but boxing is similar to karate where you're totally on the side.
[01:55:55]  But here's the thing: with boxing, you can bend down to block a punch, you don't do that in kickboxing because they'll kick your fucking head right off your shoulders.
[01:56:03]  You see Floyd do that thing where he like goes like this and bends down.
[01:56:06]  Do that in kickboxing, and a guy will just send a foot right into your mouth, right?
[01:56:11]  So it's like little shit that I'm learning.
[01:56:14]  Anyway, we should all do that.
[01:56:15]  We should all go to like month of classes and just like just fucking tap around.
[01:56:19]  Dude, it is one, it's exciting as fuck.
[01:56:22]  It feels like you're on stage.
[01:56:24]  I'm with it.
[01:56:24]  Like, you know how when you're on stage, I don't know if you feel this way.
[01:56:27]  Like, even if you had the worst day for that time, your brain can be off of it.
[01:56:31]  That's what sparring feels like.
[01:56:32]  Yeah, I never sparred.
[01:56:33]  I only did the class for like a couple months, and then I just didn't spar.

=== James Harden Defense Stats (09:36) ===

[01:56:37]  So, which podcaster or YouTuber wants to fight?
[01:56:39]  Let's go.
[01:56:41]  It was funny when I did it, when I was doing the Logan Paul podcast, he's a big kid.
[01:56:46]  Like, he's muscular and he's strong, and he's naturally athletic.
[01:56:50]  You can see it.
[01:56:53]  And I remember watching him because he had done, I think, some MMA in high school.
[01:56:56]  So he has like a background.
[01:56:58]  But I'm curious to watch the fight to see what kind of to see what kind of skills.
[01:57:02]  You should like do one of those watch things.
[01:57:05]  Yeah.
[01:57:06]  Maybe we go.
[01:57:07]  I was telling him if I'm in LA, I'll go.
[01:57:09]  What is it?
[01:57:10]  November?
[01:57:10]  November.
[01:57:11]  But, yeah, man, it's an interesting.
[01:57:15]  We got to do it.
[01:57:16]  We got to do a little training.
[01:57:17]  We got to get in the gym a little bit.
[01:57:18]  I try to do it on the road.
[01:57:19]  We try to hit the gloves on a road, but we're going to.
[01:57:21]  It's hard because we're going.
[01:57:22]  Every day.
[01:57:23]  But we got a new rule on the road so we don't get fat.
[01:57:26]  We'll say 100 push-ups, 200 sit-ups before we leave the hotel room.
[01:57:29]  Can't leave the hotel room without 1200.
[01:57:32]  Haven't thought of it yet.
[01:57:34]  We'll see.
[01:57:35]  We'll see in Australia.
[01:57:36]  Yeah.
[01:57:38]  Anything else, Arkash?
[01:57:40]  The LeVar versus Lon.
[01:57:42]  We can say this for Patreon, actually.
[01:57:43]  There's a few we can say for Patreon.
[01:57:45]  LeVar versus Lonzo, James Harden, Rich Paul.
[01:57:50]  Well, there's also, yeah, LeVar Lurt versus Lonzo.
[01:57:54]  Yeah.
[01:57:54]  You seen the video?
[01:57:55]  No.
[01:57:56]  Can you explain to me?
[01:57:57]  Do we want to watch it?
[01:57:58]  What is it?
[01:57:59]  It's like a minute and a half of LeVar and Lonzo arguing about big baller brand.
[01:58:03]  Lonzo says you can change the name of the company.
[01:58:05]  And LeVar, which I like, he's like, no, I'm not changing the companies.
[01:58:07]  The three B's are the three ball boys.
[01:58:09]  BBB.
[01:58:10]  We're not changing that.
[01:58:11]  And then him and LeVar just start arguing about like LeVar is like Alonzo's like, the company's done.
[01:58:17]  And he's like, it's not done.
[01:58:18]  What are you talking about?
[01:58:19]  And then he, Lonzo Lavar says some shit to Lonzo about how, like, I made you a superstar.
[01:58:25]  You know, your game has been weak for a couple years or something like that.
[01:58:27]  And that's why the brand is struggling.
[01:58:29]  It gets nasty.
[01:58:30]  We might need to watch the full and then maybe take a Patreon.
[01:58:33]  That's a Facebook show.
[01:58:34]  Oh, so they'll fuck it.
[01:58:35]  They might have it though.
[01:58:36]  God damn it.
[01:58:37]  We've got to find a workaround for that.
[01:58:42]  What about this?
[01:58:43]  What about James Harden looking thick?
[01:58:45]  Oh, you've seen the James.
[01:58:47]  Speaking of boxing, that's the segue.
[01:58:48]  Let's watch.
[01:58:48]  Let's watch.
[01:58:49]  Speaking of boxing, here's James Harden hitting the pads.
[01:58:51]  He's just looking a little scrumptious.
[01:58:54]  Yeah, he just don't look like an NBA player necessarily.
[01:58:57]  But he's always been like that.
[01:58:58]  That's what I thought.
[01:58:59]  I've never seen him like that.
[01:59:00]  I never thought he was in shape.
[01:59:02]  But people are really trolling him for this video.
[01:59:06]  Oh, yeah, the back is jiggling a little bit, dude.
[01:59:07]  Yeah, but to me, he's always been like that.
[01:59:09]  Yeah.
[01:59:10]  Yeah.
[01:59:11]  He's always been a little soft in the midsection.
[01:59:14]  Yeah.
[01:59:14]  You know what?
[01:59:14]  He's actually doing a decent job of staying on his toes.
[01:59:16]  His balance is completely off.
[01:59:18]  If you notice, no power on the punches.
[01:59:20]  Yeah.
[01:59:20]  I mean, he probably tired because he, you know.
[01:59:22]  He did a little thing for a little bit of exercise.
[01:59:25]  But it's fascinating to see how wildly uncoordinated.
[01:59:29]  Okay, so he looks like a girl fighting in a pool, right?
[01:59:34]  Doesn't he look like that, right?
[01:59:36]  Now, he is arguably one of the most coordinated human beings on the planet.
[01:59:39]  Yeah.
[01:59:40]  But he can't throw punches to save his life, right?
[01:59:42]  Muhammad Ali, my dad used to interview Muhammad Ali a lot.
[01:59:45]  He would cover boxing for NBC.
[01:59:48]  He said Muhammad Ali was the perfect athlete.
[01:59:52]  I mean, you couldn't, nobody had that kind of like hand-eye coordination, foot speed at that height weight.
[01:59:57]  I mean, it was just unbelievable.
[01:59:59]  He threw like a girl.
[02:00:02]  Really?
[02:00:03]  Oh, I got it.
[02:00:04]  He couldn't throw a football.
[02:00:06]  Oh, you mean like throw.
[02:00:07]  Yeah.
[02:00:08]  Oh, Kathy, you've been throwing.
[02:00:09]  Dad was like shocked.
[02:00:12]  He couldn't believe that you could be so gifted physically and then not be able to just throw a baseball.
[02:00:20]  It seems like the most, or throw a football.
[02:00:22]  It seems like the most.
[02:00:23]  When he threw from his chin.
[02:00:25]  You know how girls be throwing where they got no coordination whatsoever?
[02:00:29]  But here's a perfect example.
[02:00:30]  Like James Harden, you think, oh, yeah, you know how to throw punches.
[02:00:32]  No.
[02:00:33]  I mean, you see Floyd plays basketball all the time.
[02:00:35]  I'm not impressed when I watch him play.
[02:00:37]  But he doesn't look uncoordinated.
[02:00:41]  He looks a little bit close to you guys.
[02:00:43]  He looks a little goofy to me.
[02:00:44]  Like really jerky.
[02:00:46]  It's like a rabbit playing basketball.
[02:00:48]  It's not fluid at all.
[02:00:49]  It's like all effort.
[02:00:50]  It's like he's so effortless in the ring.
[02:00:52]  And then on the basketball, you could tell he's the quickest person on the ever switch.
[02:00:56]  It's just like a rabbit, like a jackrabbit just hopping around court.
[02:00:59]  Yeah.
[02:01:00]  It's like, how do I make up for the fact that I'm not as good at this?
[02:01:02]  Yeah.
[02:01:03]  I'll just use all elite athleticism.
[02:01:06]  His release just looks like a, it's, I don't know.
[02:01:08]  It's just like.
[02:01:08]  Same with Manny Packet.
[02:01:10]  He looks absurd on the court.
[02:01:13]  But yeah.
[02:01:13]  Yeah, James Harden need to lay off that fucking Nando's or whatever.
[02:01:17]  But hasn't he?
[02:01:18]  No, he doesn't.
[02:01:18]  No, he doesn't because he's been like that and he's fucking a scoring machine.
[02:01:22]  I wonder if he lost weight, would he be a better defender?
[02:01:25]  Would he be a better, would he not be tired at the end of games?
[02:01:28]  Some people are just comfortable.
[02:01:29]  So here's a question.
[02:01:33]  You see him towards the end of the season, especially towards the end of the playoffs.
[02:01:37]  Against the Warriors two years ago in particular at game seven.
[02:01:40]  Game seven, you're missing 20 straight threes.
[02:01:43]  If you're 10 pounds lighter, are you as tired over the course of the season?
[02:01:46]  Specifically your legs.
[02:01:48]  Specifically your legs.
[02:01:49]  So there was the guy who started Nike.
[02:01:51]  What was his name?
[02:01:52]  Phil Knight.
[02:01:53]  Phil Knight.
[02:01:54]  So when he was developing these sneakers, right, there's a movie called Pre-Fontaine or Pre or something like that.
[02:01:59]  Yeah, I think it's just pre.
[02:02:00]  And he was working with runners at Oregon.
[02:02:03]  And when he was developing these sneakers, he calculated the weight.
[02:02:06]  And he was like, well, if I can get a sneaker to weigh eight ounces instead of 12 ounces, that's four less ounces they'll have to carry every single step.
[02:02:15]  Every single step for 10,000 steps or whatever it was to run a mile.
[02:02:19]  And he'd be like, huh?
[02:02:21]  Okay, that means that you'll be that amount, you'll have that amount of better cardio without improving your cardio.
[02:02:32]  So if you can't make your sneaker weigh less, you could make your pecs and your stomach weigh less.
[02:02:39]  You can make your back weigh less.
[02:02:41]  It'd be interesting to see what happens.
[02:02:43]  But the other question is, if he loses some of that physicality or loses some of that size, can he take the punishment?
[02:02:50]  That's another question.
[02:02:51]  And he's, yeah, he's also punishing on offense.
[02:02:54]  Like he can.
[02:02:55]  Body.
[02:02:56]  Yeah.
[02:02:56]  Yeah, he could get in there.
[02:02:58]  He could work you.
[02:02:59]  And it's like, can you handle that?
[02:03:01]  Can you handle going to the basket and getting fouled?
[02:03:03]  And can you dole out as much punishment?
[02:03:04]  Of course.
[02:03:05]  Because there's fat strength.
[02:03:06]  You know what I mean?
[02:03:07]  You lose weight.
[02:03:08]  Suddenly you get a little weaker.
[02:03:10]  And now you're going to the basket and you're getting pushed around when you go to the basket instead of you pushing people around.
[02:03:14]  I still think it'd be worth it to try at least losing 10 pounds.
[02:03:18]  I don't know.
[02:03:19]  He's kind of been this way.
[02:03:21]  He's a great.
[02:03:22]  So I know we said this with Chris Paul and maybe it didn't work out.
[02:03:25]  But there is a world maybe where you try to limit a James Harden to a 30 minutes a game, 33 minutes a game.
[02:03:35]  And then in that off time, you just let Westbrook go nut.
[02:03:39]  And you basically tell Westbrook, hey, do your best to facilitate.
[02:03:42]  You're going to have 12 minutes a game, which is nut time.
[02:03:46]  Yeah.
[02:03:46]  And we want you to go nut.
[02:03:48]  And we want you to take whatever shot you want.
[02:03:50]  Just the other time when you're on the floor with James, be that elite facilitator.
[02:03:55]  Yeah.
[02:03:56]  You still get your triple double.
[02:03:58]  Son, you're going to get your triple dub.
[02:04:01]  Just a few less points, few more assists.
[02:04:05]  Still get in there and rebound.
[02:04:06]  There was a, did you guys see the convo?
[02:04:09]  We should probably get out of here soon, but did you see the convo about that Harden was upset that he didn't win MVP?
[02:04:15]  This keeps bubbling up.
[02:04:16]  And he's like, it's all a media narrative from what I said.
[02:04:18]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:04:19]  And he brought up something that was quite interesting, which was I had, you know, 50, 30-point games, two 50-point games.
[02:04:26]  I averaged a triple-double.
[02:04:28]  I did all these things.
[02:04:29]  And it's like, how do I not win MVP?
[02:04:31]  Because the media decided who was going to win MVP from the beginning.
[02:04:34]  And while it's an interesting argument, and he did have more impressive scoring, he did it at a lower percentage.
[02:04:46]  Like lower shooting percentage?
[02:04:47]  Yeah.
[02:04:47]  So John, so it's like, what would you really want?
[02:04:50]  Do you want more points at a lower clip or less points at a higher clip?
[02:04:57]  I would almost always go for the latter.
[02:05:00]  Which is...
[02:05:00]  Less points at a higher clip.
[02:05:01]  Right.
[02:05:02]  26 a game at 56% shooting over 30 a game at 42 percent 43 percent.
[02:05:10]  Yeah.
[02:05:11]  I kind of agree.
[02:05:13]  Yeah.
[02:05:14]  And also Giannis is a better defender.
[02:05:16]  Yeah.
[02:05:16]  So if we're giving MVPs, it's got to go both sides, right?
[02:05:20]  Yeah.
[02:05:20]  That means half the game.
[02:05:21]  James Harden always has a case for offensive, the best offensive player in the league.
[02:05:25]  Right, but it is half the game to fucking play defense.
[02:05:27]  MVPs based on numbers?
[02:05:29]  Harden every year based on scoring.
[02:05:31]  Because you can't really calculate defense.
[02:05:33]  You can't.
[02:05:34]  And since it's not a stat, nobody fucking works on it.
[02:05:37]  Yeah.
[02:05:38]  And if there was a stop stat, or like, you know how they have in football, hurries.
[02:05:44]  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:05:45]  Yeah.
[02:05:45]  If they had a stat for a player trying to score on you and then not be a denied stat.
[02:05:51]  Yeah, denial stat.
[02:05:52]  Denial stat, something like, or forced bad shot stat.
[02:05:57]  I bet you would see these stat nerd players lean into.
[02:06:01]  All players.
[02:06:02]  All players are motivated by stats.
[02:06:03]  I think the greatest, greatest are the ones that are like, nah, I'm going to focus on defense because I want to win.
[02:06:07]  Because I want to win.
[02:06:07]  And that's what separates the greatest players from the really good players.
[02:06:11]  Because sometimes they get used to not winning.

=== Hyenas Want to Win (01:48) ===

[02:06:13]  Maybe.
[02:06:14]  Can fucking get used to not winning.
[02:06:16]  You know what?
[02:06:17]  That makes a lot of sense.
[02:06:18]  And scary as it is, you fucking get used to it.
[02:06:20]  You get comfy with your salary.
[02:06:22]  You get comfy with your life.
[02:06:23]  You find joy in other things.
[02:06:24]  And you just accept, I'm not going to win a championship.
[02:06:28]  And fuck if that isn't scary.
[02:06:31]  Yeah, bro.
[02:06:32]  And do you think Harden is there?
[02:06:35]  I don't know.
[02:06:36]  I just don't see him working on the stuff I feel like he should be working on.
[02:06:40]  Like a one-legged three is great.
[02:06:41]  That's dope.
[02:06:42]  How about two-legged D?
[02:06:43]  Yeah, how about two-legged D?
[02:06:46]  How about you win more games in the playoffs?
[02:06:48]  You know what I mean?
[02:06:48]  Like, what are you doing for that?
[02:06:49]  Yeah.
[02:06:50]  I don't ever hear him talking about that.
[02:06:51]  Yeah.
[02:06:52]  Yeah.
[02:06:53]  Well, look, guys, this has been another episode of Flagrant 2 No Easy Buckets Analysis by Asshole's Water Cooler Conference for your sports teams.
[02:06:59]  We will see you for the Patreon episode this Friday.
[02:07:02]  And what, what?
[02:07:04]  Post row.
[02:07:05]  Oh, no, no, no.
[02:07:05]  No post, no post.
[02:07:07]  No, no.
[02:07:07]  I did two in a row.
[02:07:08]  Oh, sorry.
[02:07:09]  So the, yeah, so we're recording the Patreon episode on Tuesday.
[02:07:17]  And then that's going to come out Friday.
[02:07:18]  And then we will be away.
[02:07:21]  Alex and I will be away next week.
[02:07:24]  Sorry, this week and next week.
[02:07:25]  And then we'll all be back the following week.
[02:07:27]  But the episode will come out a little bit late that Tuesday because we'll probably be recording Tuesday day.
[02:07:32]  Okay.
[02:07:33]  So Akash next week.
[02:07:35]  Kaz next week.
[02:07:36]  Maybe some guests.
[02:07:37]  I think next week, Patreon, you're going to get the history of the hyenas.
[02:07:40]  The hyenas are coming through for Patreon.
[02:07:41]  We're going to get wild.
[02:07:43]  So, hey, man, just enjoy.
[02:07:44]  Have the most fun.
[02:07:45]  We obviously wish we could be here.
[02:07:47]  You know, if we're awake and you guys are recording, we'll give you guys a phone call.
[02:07:50]  No doubt.
[02:07:50]  Shoot us a text maybe if we're up for whatever reason.
[02:07:53]  We can just say what up to y'all.
[02:07:54]  But love y'all, man.
[02:07:55]  Tune the fuck in.
[02:07:56]  Enjoy.
[02:07:57]  And yeah, always keep it tight, man.
[02:08:00]  Peace.
[02:08:01]  Thank you.