Fear& - The After Wedding Show | Fear& Aired: 2025-09-15 Duration: 01:02:36 === Celebrating Will Neff's Birthday (04:04) === [00:00:00] That's what I'm saying. [00:00:02] Yeah. [00:00:04] Oh, no. [00:00:06] Not this celebration. [00:00:06] He's giving me Toby Joy. [00:00:08] Not this celebration. [00:00:10] We're three questions in. [00:00:12] It feels like you're celebrating early. [00:00:30] Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another episode of the Fear and Podcast where we celebrate Will Neff's birthday. [00:00:38] Yay! [00:00:40] Happy birthday to you. [00:00:46] Happy birthday to you. [00:00:51] Happy birthday, dear Will Neff. [00:00:55] Will Neff. [00:00:58] Happy birthday to you. [00:01:06] He's gonna blow up. [00:01:07] He's gonna blow. [00:01:09] We need to stop this before he commits Sudoku on camera. [00:01:13] Hey, Will. [00:01:13] Sudoku is a math puzzle. [00:01:15] How are you? [00:01:16] See, I said that deliberately and he didn't even pick that up. [00:01:20] Oh, how are you, Will? [00:01:22] 24 years young. [00:01:23] 24 years old. [00:01:25] Celebrating his birthday. [00:01:27] And cutie has brought you a key lime pie. [00:01:30] My favorite. [00:01:33] I got you presents. [00:01:35] Oh, wow. [00:01:36] So many people. [00:01:39] You guys don't know. [00:01:39] Will hates his birthday. [00:01:41] He's not a big fan of his birthday. [00:01:44] Also, probably not helped by the fact that he made a minute drive from a faraway distance because we were all at my... [00:01:52] This is so cool. [00:01:54] There's the Darrell Rivas jersey. [00:01:56] I'm going to get this framed. [00:01:57] This is so awesome. [00:01:58] It's got a signature on it. [00:02:02] This one isn't from me. [00:02:03] This one's from Benson Boone. [00:02:07] Benson Boone directly was like, give this a bunch of people. [00:02:10] I told them that you stole my Benson Boone shirt. [00:02:12] And they said, all right, well, here's this. [00:02:15] So Benson Boone's team. [00:02:17] But I don't like to say Benson Boone. [00:02:19] Benson Boone sent it on over just for you. [00:02:22] It specifically said for Will. [00:02:23] That's awesome. [00:02:24] That's for you. [00:02:25] And then... [00:02:26] He looks so hot. [00:02:27] One surprise? [00:02:28] Well, that was a surprise, but that was from Benson. [00:02:29] And then you knew about this one. [00:02:30] But this was a surprise from me. [00:02:32] Oh, my gosh. [00:02:34] I'm actually measuring the worth of all the gifts that you got to Will and comparing it to the gifts that I've gotten. [00:02:41] What did I get? [00:02:41] I don't think I got this. [00:02:42] I don't think you got this on anything. [00:02:44] Did I? [00:02:45] But you have, what can you get a man that has everything? [00:02:47] Yeah. [00:02:48] Will has everything too? [00:02:49] What the hell? [00:02:50] Well, truly, I got me something. [00:02:51] Yeah, I'm sure you did. [00:02:53] I got you one thing once. [00:02:54] Yeah, probably. [00:02:57] It's cute. [00:03:00] That's good. [00:03:01] I'll have somewhere to put all this stuff. [00:03:03] It's a little China container and it says drugs. [00:03:06] Oh, that's amazing. [00:03:08] Does it have any in this? [00:03:09] Is that from your store? [00:03:11] No. [00:03:11] No, it's just from this. [00:03:13] This is cute. [00:03:14] Cute. [00:03:14] I saw it in the window. [00:03:15] Will you actually put them in there? [00:03:19] I don't think I have enough drugs. [00:03:21] You could call like your grandma's ashes. [00:03:22] But if it, yeah. [00:03:24] If a cop shows up, if a cop shows up and he, he's not going to think. [00:03:28] He's not going to think that's drugs. [00:03:29] He's going to think it's like, come on, officer. [00:03:30] There's no way I'd put that in there. [00:03:32] That's the last thing they'd expect. [00:03:34] Yeah, exactly. [00:03:34] That's what I'm saying. [00:03:35] I just think you'd need so many drugs. [00:03:38] Yeah, but that's like basically what she's saying is like, you know, now you have something to work towards. [00:03:43] I'm not swear to. [00:03:43] Okay. [00:03:46] Horses are going to go without tranquilizer if I fill that thing up. [00:03:49] Yeah. [00:03:50] Well, they don't need it. [00:03:52] Yeah. [00:03:52] Thank you. [00:03:53] You're welcome. [00:03:54] This is dope. [00:03:55] I have a guy that I frame stuff with that I'm going to immediately frame this with. [00:03:59] This is awesome. [00:03:59] I'll put it up to my next to my Broadway Joe. [00:04:03] This is cool. === The Heart Attack Decision (15:14) === [00:04:04] Darrell Rivas. [00:04:05] I wonder why he signed it, number 29 out of 24. [00:04:08] That's interesting. [00:04:10] Oh, that's cool. [00:04:12] That's cool. [00:04:13] That is weird. [00:04:14] Thank you. [00:04:15] You're welcome. [00:04:15] I also love the Benson Boone album. [00:04:18] Thanks, Benson. [00:04:19] Shouts out. [00:04:20] Why are you such a Benson hater? [00:04:21] I'm not. [00:04:21] No, say it. [00:04:22] Benson's watching this because he wanted to know what Will was going to say on this album. [00:04:25] So say what you want to say about Benson. [00:04:26] Say it out loud. [00:04:27] I have nothing negative to say about him. [00:04:29] I don't know. [00:04:29] I don't know Benson. [00:04:30] Feels like you got something to say. [00:04:32] Say it. [00:04:32] No, I just don't know anything about him. [00:04:34] I became more of a fan after I saw his cover of it. [00:04:37] Well, cover of Adele and his beautiful singing. [00:04:42] He's hot. [00:04:43] Yeah, he's hot, but like, there's a lot of hot guys out there. [00:04:45] I, well, he's the hottest. [00:04:47] And you like them all. [00:04:48] I know. [00:04:49] I'm looking at a couple of them right now, but just because they're hot. [00:04:51] Wow. [00:04:52] Speaking of hot guys. [00:04:54] Interesting. [00:04:55] What's going on? [00:04:56] Well, what's crazy? [00:04:57] You really. [00:04:58] So we were at this wedding last night. [00:05:00] Okay, first of all, we got to talk about that. [00:05:03] What? [00:05:03] Okay, go on. [00:05:04] Because we were at the wedding. [00:05:06] My brother's wedding. [00:05:07] Yeah. [00:05:07] And then you invited yourself. [00:05:10] He had COVID. [00:05:11] So, well, here's, well, I don't know. [00:05:13] Now, here's the deal. [00:05:14] I hope you don't have COVID. [00:05:15] I will let the folks at home decide what you can be on your own island this week. [00:05:20] I'll let the folks at home decide what was right. [00:05:23] No, no, he's gotten tested for the record. [00:05:25] Leave him alone. [00:05:26] His partner had COVID. [00:05:28] We didn't know. [00:05:28] Thank you. [00:05:29] So, this is what happened. [00:05:31] I was sick for about a week and a half, and I don't know what I had. [00:05:34] But then Christian comes home the night before the wedding and tests positive for COVID. [00:05:39] For those of you who are in doubt about that diagnosis, I have the picture of the test, and also I have a photo of the COVID test on FaceTime with Caroline. [00:05:49] We are there now that we have to keep our fucking COVID tests to prove. [00:05:53] Yes, I still have the COVID test. [00:05:55] I still, the COVID is attached to the test. [00:05:57] We can send it to the lab if that's what we think is necessary. [00:06:01] I even called Caroline. [00:06:02] I said, Hassad is not going to believe this. [00:06:05] Hassad is not going to believe it. [00:06:07] I still don't. [00:06:07] Yeah, he's not going to believe it. [00:06:10] So I said, Okay, I have COVID. [00:06:13] What is the responsible decision to make? [00:06:16] You don't have COVID. [00:06:17] If you had COVID, you wouldn't be here. [00:06:19] No, I know. [00:06:19] I don't have COVID. [00:06:21] I have been testing negative for COVID, but out of an abundance of caution, where there was a very large group gathering of old-ass people. [00:06:28] Of older people, I said, in the off chance that I do have COVID. [00:06:34] Guys, I'm not that old. [00:06:35] Right? [00:06:36] In the off chance that I do have COVID, it would be smart to stay back. [00:06:41] Now, I just still don't. [00:06:42] In the case of my podcast co-hosts, you know, you guys are youthful with good working immune systems, and I have tested negative. [00:06:51] We were a couple days away. [00:06:52] Thank you. [00:06:53] You have been, you have tested negative routinely. [00:06:55] Yes. [00:06:56] And you tested negative before the event as well. [00:06:58] I did. [00:06:59] I did. [00:07:00] And my thing is, you know. [00:07:03] Okay. [00:07:03] What's your thing? [00:07:04] You invited yourself. [00:07:06] Hold on, hold on, hold on. [00:07:07] To my brother's wedding. [00:07:08] Okay. [00:07:09] You forgot my brother's wife's name. [00:07:13] Well, at the time, further, hey, Your Honor, at the time, it was just his fiancé. [00:07:17] That's right. [00:07:18] You imagine. [00:07:18] I forgot my brother's now wife. [00:07:21] Well, but at the time, fiancé's name. [00:07:23] Yeah. [00:07:23] Right. [00:07:24] After invite, I just, I want to, I want to stress this one more time. [00:07:26] You invited yourself. [00:07:28] I was going to be invited anyway. [00:07:30] Invited your son. [00:07:31] I was going to be invited anyway. [00:07:32] To my brother's wedding. [00:07:33] Your honor, that's a leading question. [00:07:35] Yeah, thank you. [00:07:36] Well, he did invite him, so I don't know what that is. [00:07:38] Is it not true? [00:07:39] I don't recall. [00:07:40] He definitely did. [00:07:41] He was 100% invited. [00:07:42] I don't even think Murat fucks with you for real, for real. [00:07:44] No, no, no. [00:07:45] Cutie Cinderella was not. [00:07:46] Like, Cutie Cinderella just basically threw it out there that she would make the cake. [00:07:50] Like, that was her involvement. [00:07:51] Respectfully didn't want to go. [00:07:52] I'll be honest with you. [00:07:53] I'm going to go out on a limb and say I may talk to Murat on the phone more than you do. [00:07:58] Whoa. [00:08:00] No, you don't. [00:08:02] On the phone. [00:08:03] No, you don't. [00:08:05] I call him. [00:08:06] We talk. [00:08:07] I talk to my brother on the phone every day. [00:08:09] Okay, well, then maybe you're right. [00:08:10] You talk to him more than I did. [00:08:11] I'm not insane. [00:08:12] I was just, I thought maybe I had something there, but evidently. [00:08:15] You have nothing. [00:08:16] You have nothing? [00:08:17] Again, I called Murat to let him know. [00:08:20] You know who you disappointed the most? [00:08:21] Who? [00:08:22] My father. [00:08:23] I did not. [00:08:24] Yes, but. [00:08:25] Really? [00:08:25] Why are you trying to hurt him? [00:08:27] Wait, because I'm hurt. [00:08:28] Wait. [00:08:29] Wait, your father was disappointed? [00:08:31] Yes. [00:08:32] What did he say? [00:08:33] He said, well. [00:08:34] Why did he get a bigger piece? [00:08:35] I used to, I used to. [00:08:37] Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. [00:08:38] Austin made me understand people. [00:08:42] No, no. [00:08:43] Now I'm reconsidering. [00:08:44] No, no, no, no. [00:08:44] You got to tell me, what did your father say? [00:08:46] Did he not understand? [00:08:48] Did he think I was lying? [00:08:50] He just went. [00:08:52] Is that what he? [00:08:53] He didn't think I was telling the truth. [00:08:55] I was advised by Caroline in particular. [00:08:58] Don't try to shift the blame over to other people. [00:09:00] Are you trying to throw my girlfriend on? [00:09:02] No, she made the right decision. [00:09:06] She made the right call, right? [00:09:09] I think. [00:09:10] I don't know. [00:09:11] I don't know. [00:09:12] Maybe I could go back and leave him alone. [00:09:15] Maybe next time. [00:09:16] No. [00:09:17] I don't know. [00:09:18] I thought it was a response. [00:09:19] He's indigestion. [00:09:20] Look at him. [00:09:21] He's stressed. [00:09:23] You get married multiple times throughout your life, right? [00:09:25] It's not that significant. [00:09:26] I talked to Murat and he told me, make the decision that you think is the right one. [00:09:30] I won't hold it against you. [00:09:32] And make it up to me by getting your pilot's license is what he told me. [00:09:36] You've known Murat for, what, 15 years? [00:09:38] What do you think that means? [00:09:39] You make the right decision. [00:09:42] What do you think that means? [00:09:43] Leave him alone. [00:09:46] Do you want to know? [00:09:47] Yeah. [00:09:48] Oh, he's so pissed. [00:09:50] No, I shouldn't. [00:09:51] Yeah, but you made the right decision. [00:09:55] Okay. [00:09:55] He's mad? [00:09:57] He's like his brother. [00:09:58] They're both totally unfair when it comes to this. [00:10:01] No, I don't care. [00:10:02] He's pissed? [00:10:04] I wouldn't say he was pissed. [00:10:06] He was just like. [00:10:09] What? [00:10:10] You're not invited to the next one. [00:10:12] You said you wanted to know. [00:10:13] I'm the one sticking up for you. [00:10:17] It's fine. [00:10:18] You made the right decision. [00:10:19] Dude, this is delicious. [00:10:21] I mean, did he want me? [00:10:22] What if I would have gone and given everybody COVID? [00:10:26] Would that have been worth it? [00:10:28] You want to know the funniest thing? [00:10:31] The house you rented was fucking gigantic. [00:10:34] Yeah. [00:10:35] And it was Caroline and I in a four-bedroom house. [00:10:39] And we couldn't convince anybody to leave the wedding grounds because I can't. [00:10:45] Because, so it was a trailer park. [00:10:48] Yeah. [00:10:49] That you stayed at? [00:10:50] Yes. [00:10:50] Yes. [00:10:51] That was the venue. [00:10:52] Okay. [00:10:52] And we stayed in trailers. [00:10:54] And this is very morat, but like, he likes to universalize the experience of adventure for people who don't want to potentially do things like that, myself included. [00:11:05] So the struggle is a part of the appeal for him. [00:11:10] And therefore, I tried to communicate the will, despite the fact that it would have been very nice to stay at the four-story mansion that Austin had. [00:11:22] Well, I'm forward to it. [00:11:23] Okay, well, however many stories it is, I heard. [00:11:25] I had every intention of going to that wedding. [00:11:27] Austin, you made the right decision. [00:11:31] But I can't believe Murat is disappointed in me. [00:11:35] Sometimes you can't have your cake and eat it too. [00:11:38] So what is he? [00:11:41] How could I alleviate his disappointment? [00:11:43] What could I tell him? [00:11:44] You should buy everything off his wedding registry. [00:11:48] I've done that. [00:11:49] You've already done that? [00:11:50] Not for him. [00:11:52] Oh. [00:11:52] No, I'm saying in general, I've done that in the past. [00:11:55] Well, I'll take a look at it. [00:11:57] They had a crock pot on there. [00:11:58] Oh my god, I'm already there. [00:11:59] And you love crock pots? [00:12:00] I love a crock pot. [00:12:01] Yeah, so saved. [00:12:03] I'm already on it. [00:12:04] You're clear. [00:12:05] Everybody knows that every not one. [00:12:06] You got to get multiple stuff. [00:12:08] No, I'm going. [00:12:08] I'm going to. [00:12:09] It needs to be significant enough that they take notice of it and go, oh, Austin. [00:12:12] You're going to. [00:12:14] Everybody knows that you have one year from the wedding game. [00:12:17] He was disappointed in the sense that he likes you and he knows that you and Christian would have brought a lot of levity. [00:12:23] But Christian, definitely. [00:12:25] Sorry, what the frick? [00:12:27] My phone won't stop making noise. [00:12:28] Jesus, stop. [00:12:30] I recorded a podcast. [00:12:32] What was that? [00:12:33] It was Emmys. [00:12:34] Who are you talking about? [00:12:35] It was my, it was the Emmys. [00:12:37] I was trying to pull up. [00:12:37] I took a picture of your name thing. [00:12:40] It's a good, it's a good disappointment. [00:12:42] It's good to be missed, is what I'm saying. [00:12:44] Can you imagine if you didn't go and Murat was like, I'm glad he's not here. [00:12:49] Well, no, but like, disappointed in a way that like you made a mistake, disappointed or disappointed as no, like sad. [00:12:55] Oh, like that's sad that you're not there. [00:12:57] Well, look, Murat, if you're listening right now, I'm going to take you out to a very nice deal. [00:13:01] Oh, he'll listen. [00:13:02] Here, I'm going to listen. [00:13:04] Cute. [00:13:05] Oh, it's Austin's little. [00:13:07] I sat in your seat. [00:13:08] Oh, thank you. [00:13:09] Thank you so much. [00:13:10] By the way, Cutie Cinderella's cake was fabulous at the wedding. [00:13:13] Oh, my God. [00:13:15] I have to give Caroline Kwan credit for the most athletic thing I've ever seen Caroline do in her entire life. [00:13:22] Cutie, uncharacteristic to her. [00:13:24] Full of adrenaline from racing out to the desert. [00:13:27] Tip the cake over. [00:13:29] Wait, really? [00:13:30] Caroline caught it one-handed, brought it back to vertical without damaging at all, and then went like that. [00:13:37] And we were all like, oh, my God. [00:13:40] It was the most athletic thing I've ever seen. [00:13:43] Caroline, Caroline was in charge of holding the cake stand. [00:13:46] And when you put it on the cake stand, it can be wobbly. [00:13:49] Sure. [00:13:50] I was using this wooding cake stand that I haven't used in a long time. [00:13:53] It was in fact very wobbly. [00:13:55] So I have the cake like this, and I set it and I overcompensate with my push. [00:13:59] And so then it just starts going towards Caroline. [00:14:01] And she has one hand on the stand and the other, she goes and just kind of keeps it up straight. [00:14:05] Now, how do you transport a cake? [00:14:09] Dude, she had a whole, she had like a bank vault for it. [00:14:12] Oh my god. [00:14:12] She had something called a cake safe. [00:14:14] Yeah, it's called a cake safe. [00:14:16] I don't know if I recommend it. [00:14:17] It's, it was my first time using it. [00:14:19] But it worked. [00:14:20] It worked, but it, it shouldn't, I shouldn't have. [00:14:23] I usually don't have to do as much cleanup. [00:14:24] The reason I had to do a lot of cleanup because it was like a very long drive and it was hot. [00:14:28] And so the cake was like melting. [00:14:31] But it's a $400 box. [00:14:34] It was this cake safe. [00:14:35] We can't see Gabe. [00:14:36] It made you look very official. [00:14:38] But I just don't know if it's worth is what I learned. [00:14:41] So I don't know. [00:14:42] It's up in the air if it's worth it. [00:14:43] Don't buy it yet. [00:14:44] But yeah. [00:14:45] Jerry's out on that one. [00:14:46] Well, it looked like a cake. [00:14:48] The TV is still showing the cameras, all the cameras. [00:14:52] Sorry. [00:14:53] Now. [00:14:53] Look, it looked like a beautiful cake. [00:14:55] And I'm so happy that everybody got to enjoy it. [00:14:59] You also missed on Cutie being officially inaugurated as an Ottoman. [00:15:07] Huh? [00:15:08] Like a chicken. [00:15:09] She doesn't even know it yet. [00:15:10] Like, no, like a Turk. [00:15:12] She's Turkish. [00:15:12] In her blood and in her soul. [00:15:14] I ate so much baklava. [00:15:16] She literally went. [00:15:17] She had like six baklava. [00:15:19] I had like 14. [00:15:20] It was awesome. [00:15:21] I was so stoked. [00:15:23] She just kept going back and being like, hmm, I'm just going to have another baklava. [00:15:26] And then she just kept dipping out. [00:15:28] She was more honey than woman. [00:15:29] That would be mid-sentence. [00:15:30] I'd be like, I got to go grab another baklava. [00:15:33] Yeah. [00:15:34] But yeah, you did a phenomenal job. [00:15:37] And I know that the journey was treacherous. [00:15:40] I had an anxiety attack on my drive then. [00:15:42] Yes. [00:15:42] Oh, my God. [00:15:42] And Ludwig didn't answer because he was in New York. [00:15:44] Why didn't you call me? [00:15:46] Well, you were putting on my list, but how far down the list? [00:15:50] Well, you're probably after Caroline. [00:15:53] Caroline was at the venue. [00:15:54] And so I knew I was, I was staring at my phone, and I started having this panic attack. [00:15:58] You're a little bit, you're, you've, you've now developed like, um, you're just known as like unreliable kind of thing. [00:16:03] No, no, no, you've got, no, no, no, that's not it. [00:16:07] It was just an evil man. [00:16:10] I tell you, he's an evil man. [00:16:12] He's an evil man. [00:16:13] I knew it. [00:16:14] No matter what I said to him, I knew. [00:16:16] I think he's more disappointed in me than Murat. [00:16:18] Truly. [00:16:20] I knew that. [00:16:21] Probably. [00:16:22] For sure. [00:16:24] So I was like driving and I had all those. [00:16:27] If you're a panic attack, girly pop, you know the feeling where all of a sudden I'm like, wait, my heart is stopping. [00:16:33] Yeah. [00:16:33] Like I was like, oh my God. [00:16:34] Like I kept having like these subtle chest pains like right here. [00:16:38] And then all of a sudden it got so intense and I was like, yeah. [00:16:40] And I was like, I'm going to die. [00:16:42] Like I'm going to die. [00:16:43] And so then I called Caroline. [00:16:45] I called Ludwig. [00:16:46] He doesn't answer. [00:16:46] And then I called Caroline. [00:16:47] So I was like, okay, I'm going to start looking up hospitals. [00:16:49] Like I literally thought I was having a heart attack. [00:16:51] Were you? [00:16:51] Yeah. [00:16:52] So I'm like, I'm going to start looking up hospitals, but the cake needs to get there. [00:16:55] So I called Caroline. [00:16:55] I'm like, Caroline, I'm dying. [00:16:57] I need to go to the hospital. [00:16:58] You need to come get the cake for me because I have to go to the hospital. [00:17:00] And she was like, what? [00:17:02] And I was like, I'm dying. [00:17:04] I'm dying. [00:17:05] I'm dying. [00:17:05] Like, I know it's just a panic attack, but also maybe it's not. [00:17:08] And this is the time I'm dying. [00:17:09] That's the problem with panic attacks: you never know when it's the big one. [00:17:12] Yeah. [00:17:12] You never know when it's just a heart attack. [00:17:14] You never know when your heart's exploding. [00:17:15] Like, how would you know? [00:17:17] I don't know. [00:17:18] They probably feel very similar. [00:17:19] That's what I would think. [00:17:20] Right? [00:17:21] I mean, as you were saying. [00:17:22] So then I'm freaking out. [00:17:24] They don't get it. [00:17:24] The call drops with Caroline. [00:17:26] Oh. [00:17:27] Because I go into like this canyon and I'm like, oh my God, oh my God. [00:17:30] Will calls back. [00:17:31] He's like, hello. [00:17:32] And I'm like, I was like, crying. [00:17:35] Oh, my God. [00:17:38] I'm free now. [00:17:38] I'm in my heart this morning. [00:17:40] Will's like, what did you say, Will? [00:17:42] It's okay. [00:17:42] I said I was coming to get her. [00:17:44] Yeah. [00:17:45] He's like, well, come get you. [00:17:46] Just stay where you are. [00:17:47] Where are you? [00:17:48] And then I go, wait, I'm fine. [00:17:50] See, and then it all came back down to normal. [00:17:52] Yeah. [00:17:52] You just needed to get it out. [00:17:53] And then I stopped. [00:17:54] I stopped at a 7-Eleven and I got an aspirin just in case I was having a heart attack. [00:17:59] Good. [00:18:00] Just in case. [00:18:00] See? [00:18:01] And then I went to my car and I took the aspirin. [00:18:03] That's why you were like, oh, I took aspirin. [00:18:05] I was like, what? [00:18:06] Why? [00:18:06] Yeah. [00:18:07] Yeah. [00:18:07] You need to go. [00:18:07] In case I was having a heart attack. [00:18:09] She needs to get through the wedding before she goes to the hospital. [00:18:11] But then I go inside my car and I take the aspirin. [00:18:13] And then I go, well, what if I'm allergic to the aspirin? [00:18:16] So I go inside and I buy a Benadryl just in case I'm allergic to the aspirin. [00:18:21] I just knew I was going to spiral down the. [00:18:23] Yep. [00:18:23] You need to be check all the boxes. [00:18:25] Have you ever taken aspirin before? [00:18:27] Yes. [00:18:28] Okay. [00:18:28] But you never know. [00:18:29] You never know when you develop into one of the babies. [00:18:31] Yeah, I did take a baby aspirin, but you know, you got to just, yeah, you just got it. [00:18:35] You know, it's like one of those things. [00:18:38] Yeah, it's like cutting off the hydra. [00:18:40] You know, you just got it. [00:18:41] I had to get there to see if it was there or the cake wasn't there, you know. [00:18:45] 100%. [00:18:46] So I get there, but it's been a long drive. [00:18:48] So the cake is melty-melty. [00:18:50] Like, fuck. [00:18:51] It's just buttercream everywhere. [00:18:52] And they wanted a desert-esque cake. [00:18:54] So it's red buttercream. [00:18:55] So I'm just like, it looks like gore. [00:18:58] Like I'm just setting it up in the corner. [00:18:59] And I'm, and I was also late because it was really far away and traffic just became a human centipede of issues. [00:19:05] But anyway, but my biggest regret is that I didn't get a photo with in sunset lighting. [00:19:13] And it's like a very deserty cake. [00:19:15] And I know we got a photo of the cake. [00:19:17] No, but I know, but it's dark. === Gore Cake Regrets (15:41) === [00:19:19] Can you send it to Marsh's Discord so Gabe can pull it up? [00:19:21] It's not sunset. [00:19:24] Oh, that's the fucking picture we got. [00:19:27] Yeah, send it to, send it. [00:19:29] Oh, I saw that. [00:19:30] That would have been beautiful if I would have been done with the stupid florals while the sun was like that. [00:19:36] But instead, you showed the humping photo. [00:19:39] Yes, you showed the humping photo. [00:19:41] Instead, we had that. [00:19:42] Gabe will have that pulled up on the screen for those of you watching at home. [00:19:46] I'll send it to you now, but we'll edit it in there. [00:19:49] Yeah. [00:19:49] So, anyway, if anyone could please, if you find the photo on social media, if you could please edit it to look like a sunset and not dark, I would really appreciate that. [00:19:58] Okay. [00:19:59] Because I'm really sad about it. [00:20:01] But it's my fault for being late. [00:20:03] You made a beautiful cake and I'm happy you made it. [00:20:06] Thanks. [00:20:07] Yes, we had a grand old time. [00:20:09] I ate food. [00:20:10] I ate mostly baklava. [00:20:11] I cut the cake and then I didn't stay to dance. [00:20:13] I did leave. [00:20:15] Yeah. [00:20:16] I'm not a dancer. [00:20:17] I'm not either, but I was out there tearing the rug. [00:20:20] Yes, he was. [00:20:21] Will Neff. [00:20:22] You were. [00:20:22] You were. [00:20:22] He made me do it. [00:20:23] I saw it on Instagram. [00:20:24] Oh, don't be mean to him. [00:20:27] I'm not. [00:20:28] What sort of Turkish apology could I give to your father? [00:20:31] Because I've disappointed him so much. [00:20:33] It's just some sort of straight. [00:20:36] Is there some sort of woman? [00:20:40] It would be so awesome if your dad took him to a Turkish ball. [00:20:44] Yeah, you got to go to a Turkish bathroom. [00:20:45] What's the Turkish bathroom? [00:20:47] Oh, God, get your fucking nude ass whipped with spruce. [00:20:52] By the burliest, hairiest. [00:20:54] I mean, I would do it if it meant her not disappointed. [00:20:56] Was your dad that disappointed? [00:20:58] What about your mother? [00:20:59] That's really what. [00:21:00] Oh, so you care about my mother's opinion? [00:21:02] Yes, of course. [00:21:03] Well, they were not disappointed. [00:21:05] Did they think it was like irrational? [00:21:08] They saw you like a son. [00:21:12] No, no, no. [00:21:13] In the past tense. [00:21:15] Why would you ask these questions? [00:21:17] Look, I'm going to take you and your whole family to a nice dinner. [00:21:24] Well, and separately, will I. [00:21:27] I won't hold my breath. [00:21:28] Oh. [00:21:29] Because I might die in the process of waiting. [00:21:31] No, Well, look, I've got to do that. [00:21:35] If you could just clear your busy schedule and make time for me because you clearly don't have much for me anymore. [00:21:39] I did. [00:21:40] I did clearly schedule, clear my schedule for two days for my brother's wife. [00:21:44] Well, I'm going to take you and, well, Murat separately. [00:21:48] Oh, can't say her name. [00:21:49] Sorry. [00:21:50] That's crazy. [00:21:51] Murat and his beautiful wife separately. [00:21:55] And then I will take your parents separately. [00:21:59] Just me and them. [00:22:00] He's doing it. [00:22:02] He's watching football. [00:22:03] I'm not watching it. [00:22:03] Yeah. [00:22:04] The Vikings, right? [00:22:05] I'm not watching it. [00:22:06] I've got it out of the corner of my mind. [00:22:07] Maybe they don't want to hang out with you. [00:22:09] Maybe that's right. [00:22:10] Maybe that would be worse. [00:22:11] Maybe that's right. [00:22:12] But you know what? [00:22:13] I am going to take happy birthday, Will. [00:22:15] I am a big believer in experiences. [00:22:19] So I would like to take you and Caroline out to a wonderful dinner. [00:22:23] For what? [00:22:23] For what? [00:22:24] For your birthday. [00:22:24] Why don't we just go to dinner tonight? [00:22:26] Fun. [00:22:26] I got work. [00:22:27] Oh, okay. [00:22:28] But I would like to, if you would like, let me know what day you're free, please. [00:22:31] God, I'd love to celebrate my birthday. [00:22:33] I know you don't, but that's why I'd like to celebrate. [00:22:35] Well, let's just celebrate the day that we're together having dinner. [00:22:38] Okay. [00:22:39] Would you please terrible? [00:22:42] Name the place. [00:22:43] Name the time name. [00:22:44] He's doing this so we can set it up to be like, I'm sorry. [00:22:47] I just can't make it. [00:22:49] That's not. [00:22:50] I'm sorry. [00:22:51] He says, I'm sorry. [00:22:52] The day I was going to be like, oh, just another COVID test. [00:22:55] Guys, for those second COVID tests hit the for those of you watching at home, I had an Airbnb. [00:23:03] I let them have it. [00:23:04] I didn't even cancel it. [00:23:07] That would have been so funny. [00:23:10] With three other people. [00:23:12] I didn't even cancel it. [00:23:14] If you had done the water heater. [00:23:16] The water heater was going out. [00:23:18] I was fielding phone calls from home, taking care of my sick boyfriend with COVID, rubbing his back, taking a phone call. [00:23:25] The water heater was out. [00:23:27] Hold on, let me handle it. [00:23:28] As I was... [00:23:29] What did he have? [00:23:29] Consumption? [00:23:32] He's like, fucking 23-year-old. [00:23:34] One might say. [00:23:35] Get in bed. [00:23:36] One might say he's the real hero of the story, and we caused him severe impositions. [00:23:42] Yeah, it was actually rude of us to ask him to come. [00:23:44] He was super busy. [00:23:46] I have one hand on holding him and taking a COVID test in the other hand. [00:23:50] I barely. [00:23:50] I was swaddling him. [00:23:51] I was holding the phone like this, right? [00:23:53] Because the water went out. [00:23:56] The water went out at the Airbnb. [00:23:58] Hot water. [00:24:00] It went the wrong way. [00:24:01] They couldn't figure out how to do it. [00:24:02] No, no, no. [00:24:03] I went both. [00:24:03] He had to turn something on. [00:24:04] He was just caping, so you wouldn't get a discount. [00:24:08] 100%. [00:24:09] I turned the knob. [00:24:11] Do I need to call somebody? [00:24:12] Because I will. [00:24:13] Okay. [00:24:13] Austin would love to respond in any capacity. [00:24:16] I just don't like the insinuation that I didn't turn handle other direction. [00:24:20] Well, Caroline claimed that. [00:24:22] I tried three different showers. [00:24:23] I tried three different showers. [00:24:24] I turned them all the different. [00:24:25] This is Austin's second time throwing Caroline under the bus. [00:24:28] I love that. [00:24:28] Caroline likes to throw me under the bus a lot. [00:24:31] Caroline did tell me. [00:24:32] Uh-oh. [00:24:33] Uh-oh. [00:24:34] This is not. [00:24:34] Listen, we're going to say this lightly. [00:24:37] Okay. [00:24:37] But that Will Neff believes that his birthday is cursed. [00:24:42] And she told me some stories, and it might be cursed. [00:24:45] And so, Will, this is your time. [00:24:47] This is your floor for any stories you're comfortable with about how cursed your birthday is because it is zero. [00:24:55] Comfortable is zero. [00:24:56] Zero. [00:24:57] He's got. [00:24:58] Let's not. [00:24:59] Let's not get it. [00:25:00] A bad birthday. [00:25:01] My friend died playing football on my birthday. [00:25:04] On his birthday. [00:25:05] Yeah. [00:25:06] Well, I certainly think we could make new fun memories. [00:25:10] So I think I have this petition. [00:25:13] Why don't you choose a different favorite day and make a break? [00:25:15] That was Caroline's suggestion, too, which I think that's not how that works. [00:25:19] Okay, okay. [00:25:19] Weird. [00:25:20] You're not listening to women again. [00:25:21] So my suggestion. [00:25:24] Oh, weird. [00:25:24] That's awesome. [00:25:25] Hey, Twitter. [00:25:26] Hey, Twitter. [00:25:27] Twitter, get him. [00:25:29] Him specifically. [00:25:30] Not him. [00:25:30] Not him. [00:25:32] I like getting that birthday. [00:25:33] That's what I need right now. [00:25:34] I wasn't getting enough last night. [00:25:36] Oh, come on. [00:25:38] Come after me, but I'm gay. [00:25:40] Leave me alone, please. [00:25:43] Anyway, so just, you know. [00:25:46] Yeah, yeah, it's fine because I'm going to send you a link. [00:25:51] I think, you know, I think once you're ready, let us know the new date and we'll work around that. [00:25:56] I think I'm all about making this day better. [00:25:59] No. [00:26:00] Okay. [00:26:00] No, it's done. [00:26:02] I heard enough stories. [00:26:03] Unfortunately. [00:26:04] Unfortunately, he does have to simply choose a new day. [00:26:07] Okay. [00:26:07] I don't know what the math is. [00:26:08] Nine plus one plus four 14. [00:26:10] Honestly, in different countries, it's a different day. [00:26:15] Wait, what time were you born? [00:26:16] He's on to something. [00:26:17] See? [00:26:17] Wait. [00:26:18] Australia. [00:26:18] What time were you born? [00:26:19] Japan. [00:26:19] You love Japan. [00:26:20] You love Japanese. [00:26:21] Different day. [00:26:22] Different day in Japan. [00:26:23] Oh my God. [00:26:25] As in as the day prior in Japan. [00:26:27] Technically, you were born in Japan. [00:26:29] Day just said a different timeline. [00:26:30] No, but it's a different pan. [00:26:32] If you were celebrating your birthday in Japan, you would be celebrating it the day before. [00:26:36] If you were birthed in Japan. [00:26:39] It'd be the same day. [00:26:40] No, no, it's a different day. [00:26:42] No, it'd be a different day. [00:26:43] Even if you were in Hawaii, it could have been a different day, depending on what time you were doing. [00:26:46] Right now, it's just a still, if you're there, that's the 14th. [00:26:52] No. [00:26:52] No, if you're born, the 14th in Japan was yesterday. [00:26:56] On the 14th. [00:26:58] No. [00:26:58] Yes. [00:26:59] So, Will, let's say this. [00:27:00] What we're suggesting is if you were born in Japan on the 14th. [00:27:03] Time zones. [00:27:05] Whoa. [00:27:05] Work when the sun moves its way through the sky. [00:27:11] No, no, what they're suggesting is that. [00:27:12] It's that time zone. [00:27:13] And I still don't agree with you. [00:27:14] It is that day. [00:27:16] But I agree for you. [00:27:17] I love that you want Sui Power. [00:27:19] Here's what they're suggesting. [00:27:20] You celebrate it as though you were born in Japan and therefore do it on the 15th. [00:27:24] That's what I'm saying. [00:27:25] Yeah. [00:27:26] Because if you were born on the 14th, DMD Father fucking get your bathroom 14th. [00:27:31] No, but you were born in the United States on the 14th, but we're going to celebrate it like this. [00:27:36] We're saying, what time did he come out of your mom's vagina? [00:27:39] Oh, I see what he's saying. [00:27:40] I'm forgetting all the life decisions. [00:27:42] Shut up. [00:27:42] No, here. [00:27:44] No, I smoked my body. [00:27:46] I've got to explain it a little better. [00:27:48] So, what you do is, so you came out at that moment in time. [00:27:52] That moment in time is, you can't dispute that. [00:27:54] But that moment in time on earth was September 15th in Japan. [00:27:58] Yeah, your birthday's tomorrow. [00:27:59] So, technically, we are celebrating your birthday. [00:28:05] September 15th is your new birthday. [00:28:06] So, I'm going to call you tomorrow and I'm going to wish you a happy birthday. [00:28:09] I'm going to sing it to you on the phone. [00:28:11] Yeah, and that's a fun day. [00:28:13] Terrible things might befall you. [00:28:15] Okay, well, wait, just because I wished you happy birthday? [00:28:18] Wait, so we are now. [00:28:19] We sang happy birthday. [00:28:20] No, you're at risk. [00:28:21] Wait, don't tell him. [00:28:23] Hasan, these are for your birthday. [00:28:25] Hasan, these balloons are for you. [00:28:27] I forgot a gift, so I didn't. [00:28:28] Wait, no, wait, no, no. [00:28:31] I try and protect everybody every year. [00:28:33] And they all say that they want to celebrate my birthday and then they get hurt. [00:28:36] That was from Hudson. [00:28:37] Caroline got cyber attacked today. [00:28:38] That was her birthday. [00:28:39] She was trying to celebrate my birthday. [00:28:41] I called the heads of Google Security to help her out. [00:28:44] I called you and I got a blowjob. [00:28:47] Oh, wow. [00:28:48] Who knows? [00:28:49] From COVID. [00:28:50] From your COVID boyfriend. [00:28:52] You got COVID cock. [00:28:53] You got a COVID hit? [00:28:55] Oh, come on. [00:28:56] At least you're going to taste it. [00:28:57] Everybody knows this is a CDC. [00:28:59] You can't transmit it that way. [00:29:01] What about his poor throat? [00:29:04] It actually helps. [00:29:05] I'm joking. [00:29:05] I didn't get it. [00:29:06] But you were swaddling him. [00:29:08] I didn't. [00:29:10] You were making him suck your day. [00:29:12] He was doing this, but it wasn't on his back. [00:29:13] It was his head. [00:29:14] No. [00:29:15] He feels better today. [00:29:19] I didn't make him do it. [00:29:20] Am I wrong? [00:29:21] Was I wrong? [00:29:22] That was a bad thing, Drew Peel. [00:29:24] I didn't. [00:29:24] Was I wrong? [00:29:26] Can I be honest? [00:29:27] I actually didn't receive it. [00:29:28] I was just doing a bit. [00:29:29] I will call him if you want, just to verify that that didn't happen. [00:29:33] We believe. [00:29:34] All right. [00:29:35] Call him. [00:29:37] I hope he doesn't wish him a happy birthday. [00:29:38] Well, I take it back. [00:29:39] It's not. [00:29:40] Those balloons are. [00:29:41] I swear I was doing a bit. [00:29:42] That didn't happen. [00:29:44] Probably. [00:29:46] Please don't call my mother. [00:29:49] Who would she know? [00:29:50] I don't know. [00:29:54] Oh, he's playing video games. [00:29:55] Damn it. [00:29:55] He's not going to answer. [00:29:57] Damn it. [00:29:58] Playing fucking rust. [00:30:00] He's in Discord right now. [00:30:01] I can get him on Discord. [00:30:06] Man. [00:30:07] I'll call him on Discord. [00:30:08] Come on. [00:30:09] Gen Z. He's on. [00:30:10] He's got his. [00:30:11] He's not. [00:30:11] He's in Discord. [00:30:12] He sure doesn't text anything. [00:30:14] Okay. [00:30:14] I'm watching his thingies. [00:30:15] He's not texting a thing. [00:30:18] What are you tapping on over there? [00:30:19] Nothing. [00:30:20] He started just reading his messages. [00:30:22] I'm trying to find. [00:30:23] He's got nothing in his mind. [00:30:25] What's his Discord name? [00:30:27] I don't even recognize one person in your DMs. [00:30:30] I'm going to. [00:30:31] Yeah, it's just really nobody. [00:30:34] I don't know who the fuck that is. [00:30:36] If your DMs open, no, but I just like added. [00:30:39] All right, you got to wait for this time. [00:30:41] No, hold on. [00:30:42] I got a... [00:30:43] He's in his Discord right now as we speak. [00:30:47] I just need to. [00:30:48] You guys talk, talk real quick. [00:30:50] Watch my phone, though. [00:30:51] Watch me. [00:30:52] Watch me. [00:30:52] Okay. [00:30:53] Watch me. [00:30:54] Watch me. [00:30:54] Oh, get that? [00:30:58] No. [00:31:00] We can cut around this. [00:31:01] Okay. [00:31:02] Yeah. [00:31:02] Okay. [00:31:03] Yeah. [00:31:04] Audio listeners, he's panicking. [00:31:07] Give the phone a woo. [00:31:10] Just don't know why he's not. [00:31:11] Is my hair? [00:31:12] He hates you. [00:31:14] He just doesn't ever answer his fucking phone. [00:31:17] Because you made him give him a blowjob while he had discussed. [00:31:19] I did not. [00:31:20] Oh, that's it was a bit. [00:31:22] I was doing a bit. [00:31:23] That was a Kaya hair, just so you know. [00:31:25] Doing a bit. [00:31:27] I think it was Kaius. [00:31:30] Oh my God. [00:31:30] This fucking. [00:31:33] You got to bleep that out. [00:31:35] It is rough that he didn't answer. [00:31:39] What the fuck? [00:31:41] Oh, you guys end up at the game. [00:31:42] No! [00:31:43] I'm at the marsh right now. [00:31:44] No! [00:31:45] Watch out on Discord. [00:31:47] That was a horrific outfit. [00:31:49] Send it to Marsh right now. [00:31:50] We have to show cutie for the first time ever, and I want Gabe to pull it. [00:31:53] Okay, I went through a very. [00:31:55] Okay, I'm going to show you. [00:31:57] We might as well do this as a segment. [00:31:59] I went through a period of time in which I dressed horrifically. [00:32:03] Okay. [00:32:04] And I decided yesterday to pull up some of these photos from different years of time just to show how horrible I used to dress. [00:32:16] One day you're going to buzz your hair and we're going to look back at your current hairstyle in the same way. [00:32:20] No, take a look. [00:32:22] It is, but this is how I this is how I used to dress. [00:32:25] And I am, uh, it was, it was bad. [00:32:28] It was really bad. [00:32:29] This is a wedding that I. You sent it to Gabe or Marsh. [00:32:31] Oh, I sent it to Marsh. [00:32:33] Okay, I don't even know if I have you on Discord. [00:32:35] Oh, I don't have you either, actually. [00:32:37] Oh, no, I do. [00:32:38] Wait, Gabe, do I have you on Discord? [00:32:42] Will you just throw me in the group chat? [00:32:44] Awesome. [00:32:45] Yeah, yeah. [00:32:47] His friend requests are annoying. [00:32:53] Yeah, even Gabe is cringing. [00:32:57] As this is what I used to dress like, folks. [00:33:01] Yeah, pull that up for cutie. [00:33:04] Ooh. [00:33:06] That's fun. [00:33:07] No, it wasn't. [00:33:11] Oh, my God. [00:33:12] You look like my Lebanese friend. [00:33:15] Wow. [00:33:15] No. [00:33:16] Doesn't he look like Mo a little bit? [00:33:17] No, he looks like every old Navy ad. [00:33:19] This is. [00:33:19] Look at the. [00:33:20] Can I just say my outfit? [00:33:22] Fucking timeless. [00:33:23] Yeah, no, yours is timeless. [00:33:24] That's what I was wearing. [00:33:26] Oh, my God. [00:33:26] So that was her. [00:33:28] That was a meme from. [00:33:29] Wait, go back to that last one. [00:33:32] Oh, my God. [00:33:34] What the fuck were you thinking? [00:33:36] Okay, for the listeners. [00:33:37] Hey, you're going to be. [00:33:39] Check this is wearing white vans with ankle socks that are gray. [00:33:47] The vans are so white that if the light reflected off of them, you could blind a child with them. [00:33:52] Because I know he used to buy fresh pairs for every outing. [00:33:57] He's got the tightest pants on. [00:34:00] So tight his calves, his minuscule calves, if I'm right. [00:34:04] Oh my god. [00:34:05] I don't think my son likes you. [00:34:06] Are getting destroyed. [00:34:09] They're getting choked. [00:34:10] Yeah. [00:34:11] But the top. [00:34:12] Yeah. [00:34:13] The top is the piece of resistance. [00:34:16] This was something that I got at Buckle. [00:34:20] I don't even know what that is. [00:34:21] It's a department store. [00:34:23] Like it's rough. [00:34:25] Buckle's not a department store. [00:34:26] Well, it's like a department store. [00:34:28] It's a store in a department store. [00:34:29] It's like a department store. [00:34:30] It's a store. [00:34:30] I don't sell clothes there normally. [00:34:32] Yes. [00:34:34] A crazy question. [00:34:37] He thought it was a CVS. [00:34:38] But anyway, I went through a rough question. [00:34:40] Well, how would you explain what you're wearing to the listeners? [00:34:42] Oh, God. [00:34:43] And then there's. [00:34:43] Oh, that's the classic. [00:34:45] That's the classic. [00:34:48] That was his most redeemable jacket, and he wore that thing into the ground. [00:34:55] Baby blue, also skin tight, skinny jeans. [00:34:58] Black vans this time. === Buckle Store Confusion (07:55) === [00:35:00] I know his ass has still got the ankle socks on. [00:35:03] I know I can't see from here exactly. [00:35:06] I used to go on a trip, and before the trip, I would go buy another pair of vans. [00:35:10] Yeah, I remember that. [00:35:11] Wow. [00:35:11] You were so proud of that. [00:35:13] I mean, that's flexing on him. [00:35:14] Yeah. [00:35:15] No, but I apologize. [00:35:17] Oh, this is when I dressed you in. [00:35:19] I know, but I still couldn't. [00:35:20] You couldn't get me out of the vans. [00:35:22] Yeah, but the pants were at least not as tight if you noticed. [00:35:24] No, no, not as tight. [00:35:25] It's because I made him wear normal size. [00:35:27] Not as tight. [00:35:28] That was the most comfortable he was. [00:35:29] Like, he wouldn't go beyond. [00:35:32] That was, this is the most uncomfortable at the time. [00:35:35] Yeah, you were uncomfortable at the time. [00:35:38] We made you, we made you wear. [00:35:39] I thought I looked like shit back then, and I should have listened to you. [00:35:42] I mean, there was still a lot that we needed to work. [00:35:44] You were right. [00:35:45] We still needed to work on a lot here. [00:35:47] You were right, though. [00:35:48] You were right. [00:35:48] You both of you, all of you. [00:35:50] Cutie never said anything. [00:35:53] Or what I had to say. [00:35:54] I was a lot more supportive. [00:35:55] Will was supportive, but you should have enabler is the word. [00:36:00] Will tried to take what I would do and try to pull me just a little bit into out of my comfort zone. [00:36:06] I was shopping with you. [00:36:07] Yeah, we went to half a dozen times. [00:36:10] Dress for less. [00:36:11] We went to, what's that, Ross? [00:36:12] Not Ross. [00:36:13] We went to Nordstrom Rack. [00:36:15] Nordstrom Rack. [00:36:15] Nordstrom Rack is not Ross dressed for less. [00:36:17] Sorry. [00:36:18] Jesus Christ. [00:36:20] Ross. [00:36:22] No, Nordstrom Rack. [00:36:23] We went shopping a half a dozen times and we would go shopping for hours and I would only get you to buy like one piece of clothing. [00:36:31] I would like to make it clear for the curse that I'm not celebrating Will's birthday. [00:36:36] However, I did bring something for us today. [00:36:40] Oh. [00:36:41] Okay. [00:36:42] So I know that's for you. [00:36:45] That's for you. [00:36:46] You don't get one, Will. [00:36:48] Jesus. [00:36:49] Oh, this is a friendship quiz. [00:36:52] I know that maybe all of us, if we had to choose who our best friend was, we would be like, oh, it's Will, obviously. [00:36:59] Like if we're all in this room. [00:37:01] Obviously. [00:37:01] So I figured it'd be good for us to compete for Will today. [00:37:06] I'm ready. [00:37:07] And how much we know Will. [00:37:09] I love that. [00:37:09] So, Gabe, I sent you a quiz and Haas made this. [00:37:14] Wow. [00:37:15] So we don't know how deep it's going to get. [00:37:17] Wow. [00:37:18] And if you'll just make it big so we don't see any answers. [00:37:21] Austin's already looking for answers. [00:37:23] Stop. [00:37:23] Stop. [00:37:24] Oh, I didn't see shit. [00:37:25] The slideshow. [00:37:26] Fucking liar. [00:37:27] There you go. [00:37:27] Okay. [00:37:28] All right. [00:37:28] Who is Will Neff? [00:37:30] A best friend quiz. [00:37:31] Sure. [00:37:31] Okay. [00:37:32] I'm ready. [00:37:33] Ready. [00:37:34] The first question, of course. [00:37:36] And follow along at home. [00:37:37] How old is Will Neff? [00:37:41] So I'm just going to. [00:37:43] That's a tough one to start with. [00:37:45] Write down a number. [00:37:47] Ready? [00:37:47] Yeah. [00:37:48] Okay. [00:37:48] What did you put, Austin? [00:37:50] Ready? [00:37:50] Yeah. [00:37:51] 36. [00:37:52] Wrong. [00:37:53] What is it? [00:37:54] He's 24 years young. [00:37:56] Good answer. [00:37:57] Good answer. [00:37:57] I put 35. [00:37:59] Wrong. [00:38:00] He's 24 years young. [00:38:01] Okay, so what's the inside? [00:38:03] What's the correct answer? [00:38:04] What do you mean inside? [00:38:05] But like, is there an inside joke there? [00:38:06] I don't know what you're talking about. [00:38:08] I'm saying what his actual age is, which would be that he is 24 years young. [00:38:14] You guys went way above. [00:38:16] How old is Will Neff? [00:38:16] Let's see what the answer is. [00:38:17] Let's see what the answer was. [00:38:20] It was 36. [00:38:23] That's weird that that's wrong. [00:38:24] That's wrong. [00:38:24] That's wrong. [00:38:26] That's a wrong date. [00:38:27] That's odd that. [00:38:28] So I guess, Will, who do you want to give the point to? [00:38:30] I'll give the point to Austin. [00:38:31] Okay, thank you. [00:38:32] Thank you. [00:38:33] Okay, that's strange. [00:38:34] I don't think you'll need skim points on this. [00:38:37] We'll see. [00:38:39] All right. [00:38:41] Next question. [00:38:42] Will? [00:38:43] Yes. [00:38:44] I know this next one. [00:38:45] You do have to close your eyes. [00:38:47] What color are Will Neff's eyes? [00:38:51] I'm going to give a hint. [00:38:53] It's a bizarre color. [00:38:58] Don't even. [00:38:59] Austin's erasing. [00:39:01] That's what I put. [00:39:04] Okay. [00:39:05] Okay. [00:39:06] Ready? [00:39:06] Hassan? [00:39:07] What did you? [00:39:07] Well, Austin, since you're in the lead, what did you put? [00:39:09] Hazel. [00:39:11] I put Hazel. [00:39:13] They are Hazel. [00:39:16] Okay. [00:39:16] Brown. [00:39:17] Hazel. [00:39:18] Haas. [00:39:19] Haas is incorrect. [00:39:20] Okay. [00:39:20] That's right. [00:39:20] Okay, so we all get a point. [00:39:21] We all get a point. [00:39:22] Okay. [00:39:22] Well, I wrote Brown and Hazel. [00:39:25] To be fair. [00:39:26] Everybody gets a point. [00:39:27] Everyone gets a point. [00:39:28] I'm just. [00:39:29] Okay, well, you know. [00:39:30] Okay. [00:39:30] Sounds like Hassan finally has something he's interested in. [00:39:34] I'm trying to. [00:39:34] I'm trying to get extra credit here. [00:39:38] No one is giving it to me. [00:39:40] Okay. [00:39:40] I'm in the league. [00:39:41] All right. [00:39:43] Next, what is Will Neff's middle name? [00:39:47] Oh, there's an opportunity for I'll give extra points here. [00:39:54] I have three tiers of points I'll give here. [00:39:58] Okay, one second. [00:40:02] No cheating, QD. [00:40:04] I'm not okay. [00:40:08] All right. [00:40:09] Ready? [00:40:10] Uh-huh. [00:40:11] Savage Ebers Neff. [00:40:13] I said Savage Wolfgang. [00:40:15] Okay. [00:40:17] Willard Ebers Savage Neff III. [00:40:20] But that's not his. [00:40:22] These are William Savage Ebers. [00:40:26] No! [00:40:27] Get fucked! [00:40:29] Get! [00:40:30] He didn't get the third, though! [00:40:31] Get! [00:40:32] That's not his. [00:40:32] They didn't ask for his name. [00:40:34] Bitch! [00:40:35] Gets Will better? [00:40:39] That's what he said. [00:40:40] Yeah. [00:40:41] He says, yeah, but. [00:40:44] Oh, no. [00:40:46] Not this cabinet. [00:40:46] He's giving me Toby Guy. [00:40:48] Not this celebration again. [00:40:50] We're three questions in. [00:40:52] It feels like you're celebrating early. [00:40:55] I can't believe it. [00:40:56] Okay, I gotta lock in. [00:40:58] He didn't get the third. [00:40:59] He didn't get the third. [00:40:59] That's the first thing. [00:41:00] That's just a middle name. [00:41:02] Why would that be the middle name? [00:41:03] You didn't give three tiers of criteria. [00:41:06] What was the three tiers? [00:41:08] Savage is spelled strangely. [00:41:09] Oh, yeah. [00:41:10] Oh, well, I was never going to get it. [00:41:12] Savage the normal way. [00:41:13] Wait, wait. [00:41:14] Who got the point? [00:41:14] I forgot about that. [00:41:15] That is not. [00:41:17] Austin Show. [00:41:18] All right. [00:41:19] Here we go. [00:41:19] Okay, wow. [00:41:20] We got a lot to catch up on. [00:41:21] Okay, all right. [00:41:22] Wow. [00:41:22] This feels neck and nap. [00:41:24] Okay. [00:41:25] All right. [00:41:26] All right. [00:41:26] Here we go. [00:41:28] Oh, good one. [00:41:29] How many nipples does Will Neff have? [00:41:33] Oh, my God. [00:41:39] Yes. [00:41:40] I mean, I don't know. [00:41:41] This is classic Will Neff. [00:41:43] Are you ready? [00:41:44] Three, two, one. [00:41:46] I said two. [00:41:48] Two. [00:41:48] Three. [00:41:49] I have one nipple. [00:41:51] What? [00:41:52] What? [00:41:53] I have two nipples. [00:41:54] Two nipples. [00:41:56] Son of a bitch. [00:41:56] What is the fucking nipple? [00:41:57] What is happening? [00:41:59] I don't know. [00:42:00] He's having a good time. [00:42:03] What is going on with you? [00:42:04] All right. [00:42:04] So that's a point to get back to that wolf cut. [00:42:07] That shit looked fire. [00:42:09] Okay. [00:42:09] What is the point now? [00:42:10] What are you four? [00:42:11] It's Austin's with four. [00:42:12] San has one and I have two. [00:42:14] That's crazy. [00:42:16] There we go. [00:42:17] That's a lot of nipples. [00:42:18] Very tiny nipples. [00:42:20] Okay. [00:42:20] If someone in Will's community says, oh, this is tough. [00:42:24] I don't know what this is. [00:42:25] How do you respond? [00:42:28] If anybody can tell me what it doed means, I'll give you the point. [00:42:32] I have no fucking idea. [00:42:34] I don't know what the answer is to this. [00:42:42] Okay. [00:42:43] It doed. [00:42:44] How would you respond, Austin? [00:42:47] That's how you would respond. [00:42:50] Closest as I can get. [00:42:52] I don't know. [00:42:53] I said it did in the past tense. === What Does Doed Mean (12:24) === [00:42:56] Okay. [00:42:57] You said it did in the past tense. [00:42:59] I said it doughed wide this and then you do a dance. [00:43:03] Oh, close. [00:43:04] Close. [00:43:05] Okay, what is it? [00:43:06] Who got it right? [00:43:06] Megawatt. [00:43:07] Nobody. [00:43:08] What does that mean? [00:43:09] So there, go to the next slide. [00:43:12] There was one night that we had a chatter who was like a long time chatter. [00:43:19] And we thought he was an AI, but we're like, no, this guy's been subscribed for like four years. [00:43:24] And it turns out the person had just gotten out of surgery and was on painkillers and was just kind of typing like nonsense. [00:43:32] And they like halfway got that explanation to us and we're like, are you okay? [00:43:38] And he went, it does. [00:43:40] And then we went, okay, are you having a good time? [00:43:42] He went, megawatt. [00:43:44] And so it doaded is whenever someone types something on Twitch that makes no sense, you just respond with it doad. [00:43:53] Oh, okay. [00:43:56] But the idode has gone like everywhere. [00:43:57] Like really. [00:43:58] Anybody types like total gibberish, you'll see like four or five people write it doade. [00:44:04] That's funny. [00:44:05] Okay. [00:44:06] All right. [00:44:07] Next question. [00:44:07] No points. [00:44:08] No points for anybody. [00:44:09] Shit on that one. [00:44:11] No. [00:44:12] Marvel or DC? [00:44:14] Easiest question that actually is pertinent to. [00:44:18] Don't give away. [00:44:19] I'm not. [00:44:20] You need these points. [00:44:21] I know. [00:44:21] I know. [00:44:22] It's fucking bullshit. [00:44:24] Ready? [00:44:25] Okay. [00:44:25] Three, two, one, DC. [00:44:28] God damn it, dude. [00:44:29] I mean, he wore a Batman costume here. [00:44:31] That's true. [00:44:32] I honestly, that was 50-50 for me. [00:44:34] Where does your love of DC come? [00:44:35] Well, it still is a 50-50 question. [00:44:38] I mean, for me, like, where's my love of DC? [00:44:43] I used to be a comic book nerd back when that was not something that was very smiled upon. [00:44:50] I used to get the shit kicked out of me for reading comic books, but I would go to a comic book store in Princeton above a Burger King, and I would read a lot of comics there, and I would play Hero Clicks, which was like a game with superheroes. [00:45:03] But I just was always a big DC fan. [00:45:06] I thought you said, to me, at least, that you liked it because of the complex villains in the universe as opposed to more bad. [00:45:15] Yeah, I think, yeah, I would say that Batman probably has the best rogues gallery ever. [00:45:21] And they have some really great authors that wrote some really dark and crazy stuff. [00:45:27] All right. [00:45:27] Marvel's not bad, though. [00:45:29] I think a lot of people always mistake that. [00:45:31] Shall we? [00:45:31] Any fucking points, man? [00:45:32] Give me something good. [00:45:33] Give me something tough that's like. [00:45:37] What game did Will Neff spend September 11th playing? [00:45:41] Like, like. [00:45:42] Were you laughing, Jake? [00:45:45] I know. [00:45:46] Like a couple of. [00:45:47] Wait, what the fuck? [00:45:48] What do you why don't you ever pay attention to him? [00:45:51] I mean, is it wait? [00:45:53] This September 11th. [00:45:55] Yeah. [00:45:57] Okay. [00:45:58] I mean, I hope I'm right. [00:46:00] Ready? [00:46:00] Yeah. [00:46:01] You go. [00:46:01] What do you think, Austin? [00:46:02] Peak. [00:46:04] Okay. [00:46:04] Will, or Hassan? [00:46:07] Borderlands 4? [00:46:10] Oh. [00:46:11] What? [00:46:12] Which came out today. [00:46:14] I misunderstood. [00:46:15] I thought you beta. [00:46:16] Babe 11th was three days ago. [00:46:17] I beta tested the game three months ago. [00:46:21] Oh, I thought you recently played it. [00:46:22] What was it? [00:46:24] I said plane simulator. [00:46:25] I don't know if that's crazy. [00:46:28] I didn't know if you were like... [00:46:29] You played Flight Simulator? [00:46:31] No. [00:46:32] Pokemon? [00:46:34] Landlady? [00:46:36] What is this? [00:46:37] He played Fresh Woman and completed 11 of the games. [00:46:40] What is achievements? [00:46:41] What? [00:46:42] Freshwoman? [00:46:43] I think this is a Haas joke. [00:46:46] It looks as though this is not in your Steam profile because it looks as though it is. [00:46:51] I think this is a Haas on Twitch. [00:46:54] Gotcha. [00:46:56] Okay. [00:46:56] Yeah, that's like to say. [00:46:59] It seems like you did play the landlady version, especially. [00:47:04] I actually know this is a gag because I was on set all day for Progressive on the 11th. [00:47:11] I was going to go with Pokemon because you got to play. [00:47:12] Yeah, you didn't stream on the 11th. [00:47:14] No, I was with you all day. [00:47:16] That's crazy that you put Peak. [00:47:19] Oh, yeah. [00:47:20] What the fuck? [00:47:21] Okay. [00:47:21] Trick, I should have said. [00:47:24] Some have described Wilnef as a dendrophile. [00:47:29] What does this mean? [00:47:37] Okay. [00:47:40] I think I have it, but we'll see. [00:47:45] You know what this is? [00:47:47] Well, I'll give you a hint. [00:47:48] No, All right. [00:47:57] Are you. [00:47:58] Austin, right? [00:48:01] I'm done. [00:48:01] I'm already. [00:48:03] I'm just adding additional stuff. [00:48:05] Okay. [00:48:05] Okay. [00:48:06] Reveal your answers. [00:48:07] Austin put fashion lover. [00:48:10] Okay. [00:48:10] I said scent hound. [00:48:11] He can smell peace. [00:48:12] Oh, Christian's calling me. [00:48:14] Okay. [00:48:15] Intermission. [00:48:15] Wait, what was your answer? [00:48:16] Hold on. [00:48:17] Ew, you can wait. [00:48:18] For context, give them context before. [00:48:21] Christian. [00:48:23] Without thinking, have you performed fellatio in the last three days? [00:48:31] Fallatio? [00:48:32] Blowjobs. [00:48:34] Like, what the fuck does that mean? [00:48:36] Have you performed a blowjob in the last 72 hours? [00:48:39] Oh, no. [00:48:41] Okay. [00:48:42] Thank you. [00:48:42] Thank you so much. [00:48:43] The Fear End podcast. [00:48:45] Thanks you. [00:48:45] Have you had any kind of sexual intimacy in the last 72 hours? [00:48:51] I've had COVID, so no. [00:48:52] The FearN podcast, thanks you for your time. [00:48:55] I told you I didn't. [00:48:56] I didn't make my boyfriend with COVID get me head. [00:49:01] Yeah. [00:49:01] He was just doing it really. [00:49:02] Wait, you can smell periods? [00:49:05] What? [00:49:05] Can you smell my period? [00:49:07] I wasn't trying to. [00:49:09] Oh. [00:49:10] I'm not on my period, but I was going to trick you. [00:49:12] I thought maybe you liked young dandruff, so I said a dandruff pedophile. [00:49:16] I do a dandruff pedophile. [00:49:18] Yeah. [00:49:18] Okay. [00:49:18] Let's see what the answer is. [00:49:19] What is sexual attraction to trees? [00:49:24] What the fuck? [00:49:26] What is this? [00:49:27] What is all of this? [00:49:28] I don't think we know you. [00:49:30] No, this is all like crazy. [00:49:33] Haas doing dumb stuff. [00:49:36] Why did you give this to Haas? [00:49:38] I did it. [00:49:39] No, not you. [00:49:40] I don't know. [00:49:41] Because I couldn't make it. [00:49:42] At least I'm giving like actual shit that's related to your person. [00:49:45] Listen, I saw Dendrophile and I knew he was going to do this. [00:49:48] I had a tree, okay? [00:49:50] I had a tree in my room, right? [00:49:54] And everybody kept asking me what it was. [00:49:56] And I went, it's a tree. [00:49:58] It's a tree. [00:49:59] It's a tree. [00:50:00] And I finally had a freak out. [00:50:04] I yelled at everybody. [00:50:05] I was like, it's a fucking tree. [00:50:07] And someone was like, you want to fuck your tree? [00:50:10] That was six months ago. [00:50:14] And they will not let it go. [00:50:17] Oh, you like to fuck trees? [00:50:19] I'm learning so much about you. [00:50:21] It's good that you told us. [00:50:23] I can't believe the first couple easy ones, Austin slammed points, and now I'm fucking behind you. [00:50:28] He'll catch up. [00:50:29] Now I'm fucking panicking. [00:50:31] Okay. [00:50:31] All right. [00:50:32] Next question. [00:50:34] What award? [00:50:35] What award did Will Neff win from Michigan Barn Preserve Preservation Network? [00:50:40] Yes. [00:50:42] Prestigious. [00:50:44] This is actually a real question. [00:50:46] Yeah. [00:50:48] He goes to the next one. [00:50:49] It's like barn fucker of the century. [00:50:53] Oh. [00:50:54] Okay. [00:50:55] Austin, what's your answer? [00:50:56] Best Barn of the Year. [00:50:58] I said best honey. [00:51:00] It's best barn restoration. [00:51:02] It's barn of the year. [00:51:09] I'm trying too hard. [00:51:10] I'm trying too hard. [00:51:14] Oh, God. [00:51:16] Come on. [00:51:17] There it is. [00:51:18] That's my barn. [00:51:19] Wow. [00:51:19] It's beautiful. [00:51:20] Thank you. [00:51:21] I'm so happy. [00:51:21] And guys, go and check out Michigan Bee Come Company Best Michigan Be Come. [00:51:27] I'm a bad test taker. [00:51:28] I'm a bad test taker. [00:51:29] I'm literally. [00:51:30] I'm thinking like, oh, we've always been so close, haven't we? [00:51:33] Will. [00:51:33] I'm trying to hit like extra angles because I'm thinking to myself, like, oh, it's just too easy. [00:51:38] It's just overthinking. [00:51:40] I'm starting to think maybe I shouldn't have gone to that wedding. [00:51:43] He's overthinking. [00:51:44] I don't know. [00:51:44] He should have. [00:51:45] I'm actually getting mad at this fucking stupid ass. [00:51:49] I mean, I don't know. [00:51:50] The stats. [00:51:51] I'm all, you know. [00:51:52] Did you not restore it? [00:51:53] You did. [00:51:54] I did. [00:51:54] That's how you win on Barnum. [00:51:56] Well, I thought it was like a specific subcategory that it was trying to. [00:51:59] I was trying to win extra points. [00:52:01] You see that thing on top? [00:52:02] That's called a cupola. [00:52:03] It looks like a penis. [00:52:05] No, that's a silo. [00:52:07] Did you build it on the line? [00:52:08] I know the silo looks like a penis. [00:52:10] That's true. [00:52:10] Did you guys know you can die in silos? [00:52:12] Yeah. [00:52:13] Yeah. [00:52:13] You can get crushed. [00:52:14] Yeah. [00:52:14] But the thing on the right, the little peak there, is called a cupelo. [00:52:18] I like that. [00:52:19] And we have one of the last original cupelos on a barn in the state of Michigan. [00:52:24] Why does a barn need a cupelo? [00:52:26] It's kind of like a little widow's watch. [00:52:29] I thought they were for witches. [00:52:32] That too. [00:52:33] I think you might be influenced by Hocus Pocus on that one. [00:52:38] Yeah. [00:52:38] Yeah. [00:52:39] It's awesome. [00:52:40] And Halloween Town. [00:52:42] Well, no, it's not in Halloween Town. [00:52:43] It's just in Hocus Pocus. [00:52:45] Awesome. [00:52:45] Yeah, there you go. [00:52:46] All right, next question. [00:52:49] What is Will Nef's top-selling merch item of all time? [00:52:53] I don't even fucking know anymore because I'm going to fucking come up with an answer and merch or anything. [00:53:00] He said merch item. [00:53:01] Merch. [00:53:05] Hold on. [00:53:05] Austin. [00:53:09] I got it already, but I don't even fucking know anymore. [00:53:12] I'm giving up. [00:53:13] Okay, I don't know what it is, but can I nef like as a nun? [00:53:17] Like you as a nun. [00:53:19] Okay. [00:53:19] I said hot sauce. [00:53:21] Wait, wait, but merch. [00:53:23] That's a merchandise. [00:53:24] Yeah. [00:53:25] If it's your nun fucking shirt, I'm going to lose my goddamn. [00:53:28] You made up a point. [00:53:29] I'm going to fucking die. [00:53:30] Austin really needed that. [00:53:32] Wait, I was thinking of oh, merchant. [00:53:35] I was thinking of apparel. [00:53:36] Yeah. [00:53:37] So, nefsauce.com. [00:53:39] Welcome to my fucking life. [00:53:41] Fourth wall told me that we have more recurring customers than almost any like creator merch with nef sauce. [00:53:48] Like everybody. [00:53:48] Nef sauce is really good. [00:53:50] It's the best hot sauce in the world available right now on nefsauce.com. [00:53:55] I would love some wings. [00:53:57] You want me to? [00:53:58] I have bottles now again at my house. [00:54:00] Really? [00:54:00] Yeah. [00:54:01] Yeah, bring some. [00:54:02] I'm bringing some nef sauce. [00:54:04] Look at that beautiful bottle. [00:54:06] Nice. [00:54:07] Who made the art? [00:54:08] Matt Smith. [00:54:09] No, I don't the answer. [00:54:11] Bonus question. [00:54:12] All right, let's go to the next one. [00:54:13] Oh my god. [00:54:16] That's it. [00:54:17] That's it. [00:54:17] Oh, no. [00:54:18] That's it. [00:54:19] No, no, no. [00:54:20] Hold on, kitty. [00:54:21] Can you reveal the points? [00:54:22] That's bullshit. [00:54:24] That's in last place with three points. [00:54:31] Hassan Piker. [00:54:34] I hate this fucking game. [00:54:36] This is the dumbest fucking. [00:54:37] I hate Hawk now. [00:54:38] Second place is myself with four points. [00:54:41] In first place, with double the points of the person in last list is Austin. [00:54:49] He really dialed in. [00:54:51] This is the biggest bullshit game of all time. [00:54:53] Okay. [00:54:53] That's what a loser would say. [00:54:55] Yeah, this is the only game where you get punished for knowing more. [00:54:58] And what a loser would say, unfortunately. [00:55:00] I hate this. [00:55:01] I understand. [00:55:02] I know. [00:55:03] Hey, maybe you should spend more time with him. [00:55:05] Oh, I'm sorry. [00:55:05] I didn't know what fucking dermophile was or whatever the fuck. [00:55:08] I didn't either. [00:55:09] And I still won. [00:55:10] Yeah, I know. [00:55:11] I actually got all the meme ones wrong, and I still won by double digits. [00:55:16] Double digits. [00:55:17] Barn Restoration? [00:55:19] What the fuck is that? === Hating the Garter Game (05:56) === [00:55:20] Yeah, I don't know. [00:55:21] It's like he's not even listening. [00:55:25] Man, that's tough. [00:55:26] Like, he's not even listening. [00:55:27] That's tough. [00:55:28] Oh, my gosh. [00:55:29] Well, at least I didn't. [00:55:30] Yeah, I may have. [00:55:31] At least I didn't disappoint my best friend. [00:55:36] Hassan, Austin will go to Will's wedding. [00:55:40] Yeah. [00:55:42] I will. [00:55:43] He'll be there. [00:55:44] I have missed a few weddings over the years. [00:55:48] What more is one, you know? [00:55:49] No, but I will. [00:55:50] Are you going to have a wedding soon? [00:55:52] Well, I don't know yet. [00:55:53] Okay, I made him panic. [00:55:55] I don't know yet. [00:55:56] Okay. [00:56:01] Wait, how do you know that? [00:56:03] Because he just gave him a complex. [00:56:06] I don't know. [00:56:06] Maybe he does want it. [00:56:08] Yeah. [00:56:08] No, he talks about all the time how he doesn't want it. [00:56:11] Okay. [00:56:11] Okay. [00:56:12] Great. [00:56:13] When are you guys getting married? [00:56:16] I don't know. [00:56:18] I don't know. [00:56:20] Unfortunately, I have this thing where I was like born and bred to get married at 18. [00:56:27] And then ever since I broke out of that cycle, part of me never wants to get married. [00:56:31] Really? [00:56:32] Yeah. [00:56:32] Yeah. [00:56:33] But you want a wedding? [00:56:34] No. [00:56:35] No, I'll just throw a party whenever I want. [00:56:37] I don't like that. [00:56:38] Yeah. [00:56:38] So I don't really care. [00:56:39] I don't like, I don't like, I've seen too many women be defined as being a wife. [00:56:44] That it like is a title that I don't necessarily like. [00:56:47] I'm not like keen to have. [00:56:49] Yeah. [00:56:49] Yeah. [00:56:50] I understand that. [00:56:51] Yeah. [00:56:52] Yeah. [00:56:53] Especially. [00:56:54] Yeah, you don't need that. [00:56:55] Why do we need labels? [00:56:57] Why do we need freaking labels? [00:56:58] Call him whatever you want. [00:57:00] Boyfriend, life partner. [00:57:02] Yeah. [00:57:03] Don't stop. [00:57:05] God damn it. [00:57:05] Why did you have to touch it? [00:57:07] Well, I thought it was a good idea. [00:57:07] I just don't get it. [00:57:08] I just don't know why you had to reach over and touch my microphone and break it. [00:57:12] It's fun to fix it. [00:57:14] Well, you didn't have any. [00:57:16] There was no faux pas, though. [00:57:18] It was a good wedding. [00:57:19] There were no faux pas. [00:57:20] There was no garter toss. [00:57:21] People still do gar. [00:57:22] Guys, if you're doing a garter toss in 2025, we need to sit down, honey. [00:57:26] We've got to talk. [00:57:27] Wait, why? [00:57:27] What's the wrong thing? [00:57:27] Garter tosses where they like, she like takes off her like lace. [00:57:31] No, The flowers, right? [00:57:33] No, please. [00:57:34] Take the garter off with your teeth. [00:57:35] Yes. [00:57:35] So the woman will sit. [00:57:37] The bride will sit in a chair. [00:57:38] Wait, what the fuck? [00:57:39] The groom, we pull up a video. [00:57:42] The groom will go up her dress in front of everybody with his head, grab it with his teeth, pull it off her legs, and then flick it. [00:57:49] What the fuck? [00:57:50] Yes, that's good. [00:57:52] Wait. [00:57:53] Garter toss. [00:57:54] There you go. [00:57:54] That second little short right there. [00:57:56] And then the person's dressed bites onto something. [00:58:00] This is just a papal tradition in lots of Western weddings. [00:58:02] This piece of cloth is called a garter, and the groom uses his teeth to pull it off the bride's leg. [00:58:07] Once off, he then throws it into the crowd of single men behind. [00:58:10] And whoever catches it is legally required to marry next. [00:58:14] She dives into the bride's dress and so weird. [00:58:17] I mean, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. [00:58:20] It's so uncomfortable. [00:58:21] Bro, there's like children around. [00:58:23] Yeah, look at look at some of the some of these are weird. [00:58:25] Like okay, that run-up is crazy. [00:58:33] You know, just scroll, just give us another one. [00:58:36] Oh, wait, what did that say? [00:58:37] That was drama. [00:58:38] This dad was not impressed when his daughter was doing the garter toss at her wedding. [00:58:42] For those who don't know, the garter is a band of fabric around a woman's leg which gets tossed into the crowd of single men. [00:58:49] Here is the Dutch reaction. [00:58:50] Wait, oh, you throw it to the dudes? [00:58:52] Yeah, it's the equivalent of the bouquet. [00:58:57] So weird. [00:58:59] Yeah. [00:59:00] So, you know, they didn't do anything weird like that. [00:59:05] See, and then guys, other guys catch it, even though it's been on your girl's thigh the whole night. [00:59:10] The bride was about. [00:59:13] I told the bridesmaid. [00:59:14] That should be okay. [00:59:15] You couldn't have brought it up. [00:59:17] Well, yeah. [00:59:18] So I just want to sit down, all the girly pops listening, and just tell you you don't have to do the garter toss. [00:59:25] It's weird. [00:59:26] It's not woke. [00:59:27] It's so weird. [00:59:29] It's supposed to like represent like because usually you like lose your virginity wedding night, you know? [00:59:33] Yeah. [00:59:34] It's supposed to represent that. [00:59:35] And it's like, I see. [00:59:37] Yeah. [00:59:37] I see. [00:59:38] I see. [00:59:39] Yeah. [00:59:40] And this is my gripe with weddings in general. [00:59:42] Is like when I was a young kid, it was like strange to me to see adults like drunk. [00:59:48] You know what I mean? [00:59:49] Because I had never watched your family have fun though, man. [00:59:54] I don't know. [00:59:54] I know. [00:59:54] Now that I'm an adult, it's like it doesn't matter to me. [00:59:57] But when I was a kid, I was like, the fuck, these guys are like supposed to be like godlike figures in life. [01:00:02] I saw my mom drunk for the first time. [01:00:04] It was traumatizing. [01:00:05] Yeah, it fucked me up. [01:00:06] Like, I still remember this. [01:00:08] I watched my mom. [01:00:09] I was like, hi, mom. [01:00:10] And then she fell down the stairs. [01:00:12] I was like, that's awesome. [01:00:14] Oh, my God. [01:00:15] And then she got up and she's like, I'm okay, honey. [01:00:18] And I was like, what is wrong with mom? [01:00:20] Yeah, no, it fucked me up when I saw like adults drunk for the first time ever at a wedding when I was like super young. [01:00:27] And that's why. [01:00:28] You don't really have much of a relationship with the older people in your families, huh? [01:00:32] No one from my family drinks. [01:00:33] With them literally non-stop. [01:00:36] But you've never seen them drink. [01:00:37] No, at the time. [01:00:39] When he was a kid. [01:00:39] When I was a kid. [01:00:41] I've since. [01:00:42] I love when my mom gets drunk. [01:00:43] Yeah. [01:00:43] No. [01:00:44] No, it's funny. [01:00:45] Now it's awesome. [01:00:46] I'm saying, like, but when I was like, and it wasn't even just my mom, it was like random relatives. [01:00:51] You know what I mean? [01:00:51] How old were you? [01:00:52] I think it was like 14 or 13. [01:00:56] I get that. [01:00:56] And it's like, I'm old enough to like kind of comprehend what's going on, but also young enough where it's like, I still have this vision in my mind of like adults being a certain way, like adults in my family being a certain way. [01:01:08] So that it felt like that, that like we pierce through that veil all of a sudden. [01:01:12] And you're like, oh no, they're human beings that have moments of weakness. === Piercing Through Adult Veils (01:19) === [01:01:16] Yeah. [01:01:18] Moments of weakness. [01:01:19] No, they're just having fun. [01:01:20] Yeah. [01:01:20] But that's how I thought about it as a kid. [01:01:23] Yeah. [01:01:23] Well, everybody. [01:01:26] We're going to talk more about Austin's moments of weakness on Patreon. [01:01:31] If you want to head over there. [01:01:33] All of my moments of weakness and they're going to bully me relentlessly for them. [01:01:36] Patreon.com. [01:01:38] Don't want to miss out. [01:01:38] Flash fear and see you there, y'all. [01:01:40] Bye-bye. [01:01:44] Smash your head into a wall. [01:01:47] You fucking suck, bitch. [01:01:50] No one would care less if you died. [01:01:52] Okay, I got the gist. [01:01:53] You get it? [01:01:53] Okay. [01:01:54] I got it. [01:01:54] Okay. [01:01:55] Torrent of harassment. [01:01:56] So this goes on for, I think, ends up being like two years. [01:02:00] They're like 14, 15. [01:02:02] And this is just never ending. [01:02:04] Never freaking ending. [01:02:05] Like, what is going on? [01:02:06] They're talking to the police. [01:02:07] They're talking to all these people. [01:02:09] Owen, Owen starts dating a new girl at a new school that is a town over an hour away. [01:02:15] What are you doing? [01:02:17] He moved on. [01:02:17] It's sad, right? [01:02:18] Yeah, what the hell? [01:02:19] Yeah, sad. [01:02:20] Yeah, she lives far away. [01:02:21] Yeah, she lives an hour away. [01:02:23] She lives. [01:02:23] Maybe it's fake. [01:02:24] Maybe he's like, oh, my girlfriend doesn't go here type. [01:02:26] No, because as soon as they start dating, the new girlfriend starts getting texts. [01:02:32] That's like, he's fucking cheating on you. [01:02:33] He's a fucking did all these things. [01:02:35] And so they break up