Fear& - ConnorEatsPants Unites America | Fear&
Aired: 2024-10-07
Duration: 01:02:47


=== Anti-Gay Suffering and Sleep (08:43) ===

[00:00:00]  Like Miranda Cosgrove.
[00:00:01]  I think be a great one is the guy that does can the science guy.
[00:00:05]  Bill Nye.
[00:00:06]  No, no, Neil deGrasse Tyson.
[00:00:10]  He called me Neil deGrasse Tyson, the science guy.
[00:00:14]  He is.
[00:00:15]  No, I think Bill Nye is the science guy.
[00:00:18]  That's the title of this.
[00:00:21]  His name is literally Bill Nylon.
[00:00:22]  It's crazy you guys thought of the white guy first.
[00:00:39]  Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another fabulous episode of the Fearan podcast.
[00:00:45]  Austin kid, check his hair.
[00:00:46]  The episode isn't happening.
[00:00:48]  Well, my man, my wreck fucking wrecked this morning.
[00:00:54]  Why?
[00:00:55]  Because some of us had to get up and watch football.
[00:00:58]  Okay.
[00:00:58]  That's right.
[00:00:59]  I forgot that you're fucking free.
[00:01:01]  Both of you are free.
[00:01:02]  I didn't go to sleep last night, and I'm still a better sorts than this man.
[00:01:06]  He said, he texts me at like 4:30 in the morning.
[00:01:08]  Are you coming?
[00:01:09]  I said, Will.
[00:01:10]  Game doesn't start for another two hours.
[00:01:12]  Are you ready to watch some football, pussy?
[00:01:14]  Yeah, he was ready.
[00:01:15]  He was ready.
[00:01:17]  He was juiced.
[00:01:17]  And you know what?
[00:01:18]  It was a great game.
[00:01:19]  It was a great game.
[00:01:19]  But hey, you know what?
[00:01:20]  From one fan to another, I would never fucking rub your nose in.
[00:01:24]  Austin did have to leave early.
[00:01:25]  Yes, I did.
[00:01:26]  And it's funny that you say rubbing your nose because why did you leave early?
[00:01:29]  I had a zit.
[00:01:30]  Where?
[00:01:31]  Right here.
[00:01:32]  Point to it.
[00:01:32]  It's right here.
[00:01:33]  He had to get it injected.
[00:01:34]  I had to get an injected with cortisone.
[00:01:36]  So I made an emergency appointment at 9:45 and I.
[00:01:39]  He left my house at.
[00:01:40]  Wait, but it's gone.
[00:01:43]  That's right.
[00:01:44]  Like it was never there.
[00:01:46]  You live on like an entirely different plane of existence.
[00:01:49]  It's called self-care, Hassan.
[00:01:51]  If we want to get cortisone shot into our face and we want to bleach our assholes.
[00:01:54]  Yes.
[00:01:55]  Wait, what?
[00:01:57]  Oh, that was.
[00:01:58]  You did that on your own?
[00:02:00]  I'll be honest.
[00:02:01]  I may bleach my asshole.
[00:02:03]  Like, you're not revealing to us that you bleach your asshole or no, no, no.
[00:02:07]  I think in the future, I thought about it.
[00:02:10]  You're being coined.
[00:02:12]  Like, I may.
[00:02:14]  By the way, speaking of bleached assholes, Connery's Pants.
[00:02:17]  Yeah, we have a fantastic episode lined up for you guys because a lot has happened this week.
[00:02:21]  But yeah, we decided that Cutie Cinderella is now dead and we want to bring more male energy into the podcast.
[00:02:28]  That's right.
[00:02:29]  More masculine energy.
[00:02:30]  Yeah, so we found the number one misogynist online.
[00:02:34]  The face of masculinity and testosterone.
[00:02:36]  That's right.
[00:02:36]  Connery's pants.
[00:02:37]  That's right.
[00:02:37]  Connery's Pants, my favorite TikToker.
[00:02:39]  That's right.
[00:02:39]  And Connor, we're going to charge right into it.
[00:02:41]  We're going to get right into it.
[00:02:42]  Yeah, we are.
[00:02:43]  And I'm going to suck you in real good and real long because Fortnite Fridays is my favorite thing on the internet to watch right now.
[00:02:48]  Fantastic.
[00:02:49]  Thank you.
[00:02:49]  It is a dystopian nightmare of an interview show.
[00:02:54]  And it is perfect for our time and place because there is no better backdrop for serious conversations than Fortnite.
[00:03:02]  Yeah.
[00:03:02]  No, I mean, that was kind of always what I wanted to do with it was just do like some like stupid like late night talk show on Twitch combined with like Eric Andre-esque like absurdity.
[00:03:11]  But like the best way to do that, I felt was just like in, because if it's live, I can't really like do too much like crazy shit like that.
[00:03:18]  So like Fortnite was like a good backdrop for it.
[00:03:20]  So I can be like OJ Simpson and then we'll sell for our fans who don't know what Fortnite Friday is.
[00:03:25]  We're going to cut a clip in right here.
[00:03:26]  Gabe, that's you.
[00:03:28]  George Santos clip.
[00:03:29]  Because Dragonite also learned all water and ice beams and all that stuff.
[00:03:32]  Ice beam was kind of my favorite strike, whatever.
[00:03:36]  So you get it.
[00:03:37]  Yeah, I got diagnosed like on the spectrum when I was younger, specifically because of like my Pokemon obsession.
[00:03:42]  So that was actually my diagnosis was via Pokemon obsession too.
[00:03:45]  So all right.
[00:03:45]  There you go.
[00:03:46]  See, bro, that's a true comedy.
[00:03:49]  We literally just found our autism spectrum diagnosis.
[00:03:52]  I'm just saying, bro.
[00:03:53]  Listen, I'm telling you, George, I see a lot in you, and that's why I'm hopeful that you can come around and be a light in this world, bro.
[00:03:59]  And then here's another one: Tiger King clip.
[00:04:01]  I just thought that the Tigers could have been treated a little bit better as well.
[00:04:04]  And I just thought they would.
[00:04:05]  Like, what was wrong?
[00:04:06]  I don't know.
[00:04:07]  Tell me what was wrong.
[00:04:08]  I don't know.
[00:04:08]  I don't know, man.
[00:04:09]  I don't remember.
[00:04:10]  It's been a couple of years.
[00:04:11]  You're right.
[00:04:11]  I'm a shitty.
[00:04:12]  Don't accuse me of abusing my titles if you don't know what the hell was that.
[00:04:16]  I'm just saying that maybe, you know, there's a reason that the allegations were there and that they were presented that way.
[00:04:20]  Like, what reason would Netflix had to present all that in that way if there wasn't a bit of a story there?
[00:04:24]  That was to pass the big cat safety app for Carol.
[00:04:28]  For Carol, but okay, but isn't her husband actually alive anyway?
[00:04:31]  I forgot to even mention that.
[00:04:32]  No, you are so fucking far behind on information.
[00:04:35]  Wait, I thought you were doing some homework before you called me.
[00:04:39]  I thought he was alive.
[00:04:40]  Is he not alive?
[00:04:41]  Am I wrong?
[00:04:42]  Oh my God, he hung up on me.
[00:04:44]  I see what I'm doing here.
[00:04:47]  I'm directing traffic.
[00:04:48]  Yeah, you're an air traffic controller.
[00:04:51]  Never sleep.
[00:04:52]  Dude, I sleep is so much better.
[00:04:55]  Fire me on all sides.
[00:04:56]  I mean, normally you're pretty good, but right now you're excellent.
[00:04:58]  I'm making a podcast.
[00:04:59]  And the Jets lost.
[00:05:01]  Yeah.
[00:05:01]  And you're still coming with this energy.
[00:05:03]  It's incredible.
[00:05:03]  No, I think old for sure.
[00:05:06]  I think that's what is supposed to happen.
[00:05:07]  Like, you just don't sleep at all, and then the Jets lose.
[00:05:10]  No, but like, I love Will is so like you, you guys got close.
[00:05:13]  Yeah.
[00:05:14]  I'm like a saying where I just get stronger with suffering.
[00:05:17]  Yeah, no, yeah.
[00:05:18]  But I want to go back.
[00:05:20]  You just had one of the most infamous people on the internet, George George Santos.
[00:05:27]  Santos.
[00:05:28]  George Soros.
[00:05:29]  He's not an excellent.
[00:05:31]  George Soros.
[00:05:32]  George Santos is a Republican legislator from New York.
[00:05:35]  That's crazy.
[00:05:36]  I almost said George Santos also, and that's why I stopped.
[00:05:39]  I was like, that's not it.
[00:05:42]  It is Santos.
[00:05:43]  He was infamous at Soros.
[00:05:44]  No, George Santos is.
[00:05:45]  No, it's George Santos.
[00:05:45]  He's going to get sleep, actually.
[00:05:47]  Okay.
[00:05:47]  The sleep thing, I was doing well.
[00:05:49]  Now I'm crashing.
[00:05:49]  No, it's fine.
[00:05:50]  Don't worry.
[00:05:51]  Marge is dead and dead to me.
[00:05:53]  And you're dying.
[00:05:54]  It's all good.
[00:05:55]  We're going to burn through this regardless.
[00:05:58]  So, yeah, George Santos is a New York Republican former congressperson.
[00:06:03]  Yes, that's it.
[00:06:04]  I want to talk about the process that you went through to get him on the episode because you guys had a really interesting Twitter flirtation for about like a month, I want to say.
[00:06:14]  Yeah, I mean, that's how like most of them start is just like messing with people on Twitter.
[00:06:18]  Like people like, like it's kind of just what I really, the reason it even works now is because of how Elon has just fucked over the app.
[00:06:25]  Because like what happened now is the way his algorithm works is it heavily promotes like replies, especially if you have a blue check mark.
[00:06:31]  Right.
[00:06:32]  And so I was just given it when like they switched it or everything.
[00:06:35]  So I just have it.
[00:06:36]  And then whenever I apply, I just, it's like boosted.
[00:06:38]  That's awesome.
[00:06:39]  But like it also helps if you like play in the like right-wing like bullshit.
[00:06:42]  So if I if I like fake like, oh my, I love God, Jesus, like, and I'm like, oh, okay, Trump.
[00:06:48]  Well, no, that's like, I do.
[00:06:49]  Listen, amen.
[00:06:50]  But like, if like I do that, and then like I put like an American flag in a tweet, then like if I reply to Elaine, really?
[00:06:56]  Yeah.
[00:06:57]  What if I did like gay sex, American flag?
[00:06:59]  I like that.
[00:07:00]  That's too far.
[00:07:01]  No, no, that's too far.
[00:07:02]  You have to be like right wing.
[00:07:03]  You have to be like either like center right or just far right.
[00:07:07]  You can openly be a Nazi as well.
[00:07:09]  All of those things will help you in the algorithm 100%.
[00:07:12]  Or you can disguise it.
[00:07:13]  Right.
[00:07:14]  But we're like, so what's something that's anti-gay?
[00:07:19]  That you suffered from.
[00:07:22]  So anything.
[00:07:23]  Hold on.
[00:07:23]  Anti-gay that I've suffered from.
[00:07:25]  Mark said in my life by the way.
[00:07:28]  Oh, I like that.
[00:07:29]  Like a group of people.
[00:07:30]  Just anything.
[00:07:32]  Do you experience any adversity as a kid?
[00:07:35]  I've honestly had a pretty good feeling.
[00:07:36]  I've had the feels on the side.
[00:07:38]  What's something that the gay folks are facing?
[00:07:39]  Well, I've had, oh, like gay people in general are facing.
[00:07:43]  Oh, shit.
[00:07:47]  No, We are facing a lot.
[00:07:50]  This is not, this is Republican propaganda.
[00:07:52]  It's like how they call you as somebody's going on.
[00:07:54]  No, he's on the spot.
[00:07:56]  They call you a Champagne Socialist.
[00:07:57]  He's like a champagne game guy.
[00:08:00]  I've had the princess track.
[00:08:01]  Okay.
[00:08:02]  Yeah.
[00:08:03]  Look, we are on the verge potentially of losing marriage rights.
[00:08:08]  The Supreme Court.
[00:08:09]  Here's the tweet.
[00:08:10]  Yep.
[00:08:12]  Losing gay marriage rights is part of the war on Christmas.
[00:08:16]  Okay.
[00:08:17]  That tweet, big.
[00:08:19]  Okay.
[00:08:19]  Doesn't even make sense because it doesn't actually make sense.
[00:08:22]  American flag.
[00:08:23]  Well, I know Christmas is where it works.
[00:08:25]  Rare hands.
[00:08:27]  No, but I mean, like, that's why, like, it's funny.
[00:08:29]  It's like, if I just like say something like that, like, super ironically and it's absurd, like, it highlights the absurdity of like, one, the politics, but it also, like, the fact that it's boosted is like going through the roof.
[00:08:39]  Okay, fair.
[00:08:39]  Okay.
[00:08:40]  Look, for the record, I know we are suffering.

=== PTSD from a Massive Boom (12:32) ===

[00:08:43]  Thanks.
[00:08:43]  That's good.
[00:08:44]  That was very brave.
[00:08:45]  No, Austin, that was very brave.
[00:08:48]  And that was very beautiful.
[00:08:50]  I have anxiety that goes back to my school days where I would be bullied by people like Hassan Piker.
[00:08:55]  And it makes me very anxious when they put me on this, when I'm in the room with them and I have to make activities.
[00:09:00]  Are you in the closet still?
[00:09:01]  Yes.
[00:09:02]  Speaking of being bullied, I have so many fun stories because so insane.
[00:09:07]  Will's going to be on my side.
[00:09:09]  I like to bring Austin around.
[00:09:13]  He likes to bully me.
[00:09:14]  That's what he likes.
[00:09:15]  I really do.
[00:09:17]  I love to just put him through the ringer a little bit and make him do stuff that I do for fun and like see his reaction to it.
[00:09:25]  And then it makes for wonderful podcast content.
[00:09:28]  So this weekend, obviously, Austin deliberately wanted to shoot the podcast on Friday morning or on Friday night.
[00:09:36]  None of those worked out.
[00:09:38]  And so I was like, no, your gay ass is staying in my home for an extra fucking day.
[00:09:44]  Because he wanted, we could have filmed yesterday morning, but he wanted to do a workout.
[00:09:48]  I did.
[00:09:48]  No, I wanted to stream.
[00:09:49]  That was the real reason.
[00:09:51]  Yeah.
[00:09:52]  No, I did.
[00:09:54]  I streamed.
[00:09:55]  I love working.
[00:09:56]  And how did that go for you?
[00:09:58]  It went spectacular.
[00:10:00]  So Austin was on.
[00:10:01]  So Austin was on the stream.
[00:10:02]  But that's besides the point.
[00:10:03]  Whoa, let's take a quick break.
[00:10:05]  Hasan, I want to talk to you about something.
[00:10:07]  What do you want to talk to me about, Will?
[00:10:09]  How are you finding your doctors these days?
[00:10:11]  That's wrong.
[00:10:12]  What you need to be doing is using Zock Doc.
[00:10:15]  It's a free app and website where you can search and compare high-quality in-network doctors, choose the right one for your needs and click to instantly book an appointment.
[00:10:25]  What do you think about that?
[00:10:26]  It doesn't matter what you think because we're talking about in-network appointments with more than 100,000 healthcare providers across every specialty from mental health to dental health, eye care to skincare, and much more.
[00:10:40]  Plus, ZocDoc appointments happen fast, typically within just 24 to 72 hours of booking.
[00:10:48]  You can even score some same day appointments.
[00:10:51]  You have a busy schedule.
[00:10:53]  A same-day appointment would be big for you, wouldn't it?
[00:10:56]  Absolutely.
[00:10:57]  Why?
[00:10:58]  Because I have a busy schedule.
[00:11:00]  That's right.
[00:11:01]  So stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to zocdoc.com slash fear.
[00:11:07]  Find out why ZocDoc is being talked about by us.
[00:11:11]  We're raving about it.
[00:11:12]  And instantly book a top-rated doctor today.
[00:11:15]  That's Z-O-C-D-O-C.com slash fear.
[00:11:21]  ZocDoc.com slash fear.
[00:11:25]  So basically, Friday night, I make him watch anime.
[00:11:28]  He doesn't like it.
[00:11:29]  We sit on the couch.
[00:11:31]  That could be something that gay people are facing.
[00:11:34]  Yeah, being forced to watch anime.
[00:11:37]  We had a night where we both, it was just such a wonderful night of friendship where we both sat on our phones for an hour and a half on the couch together.
[00:11:44]  Okay, to be fair, like I was looking for stuff that we could watch together and there's like not really much that we can do.
[00:11:49]  He's responding to every third conversation starter.
[00:11:52]  That's okay.
[00:11:53]  No, I was there.
[00:11:53]  I was there.
[00:11:55]  Said goodnight to you, and I was just like, Yeah, he's not gonna fucking, he didn't even continue.
[00:12:00]  What happened anyway?
[00:12:01]  So, he hated the anime, and at one point, I was like, you know, when you hear something over and over again in the distance, and you're like, That's a sound that I'm familiar with, but but it doesn't make sense in that moment, so you don't make anything of it, and then you realize no, I was thinking it was worse than that, self-sucking.
[00:12:19]  No, okay, it was worse than that, that'd be crazy.
[00:12:22]  It was worse than he was watching off on the couch, he was on TikTok watching a live Green Day performance, which is so strange to me.
[00:12:36]  I was like, Why are you watching?
[00:12:38]  I was like, Austin, what the fuck are you doing?
[00:12:41]  He goes, Oh, Green Day, they're doing a live performance.
[00:12:44]  Yeah, was it like a kid in like a crowd like recording it?
[00:12:46]  And you just know, it was somebody they invited somebody on stage, and it gets emotional, it was so great.
[00:12:52]  Was it like a kid singing?
[00:12:53]  Yeah, it's like a 17.
[00:12:57]  It was just like, What the fuck?
[00:12:58]  No, actually, I think it was another button that another 10 in the road.
[00:13:04]  He just straight up audio on, listening to a live Green Day concern.
[00:13:10]  What?
[00:13:10]  Audio on, like, as in, like, from watching a concert picture.
[00:13:15]  On his phone, it's a live concert that he's watching on his phone.
[00:13:19]  That's way more unglued if he's silently watching every day.
[00:13:22]  Okay, fair.
[00:13:23]  This man does not experience joy.
[00:13:26]  You were singing the lyrics to I want to fuck you like an animal by nine-inch nails, and he said, Is that a George Michael song?
[00:13:32]  Yeah, I don't know music.
[00:13:33]  Give me a break.
[00:13:34]  Yeah, it's not even close.
[00:13:35]  I don't know music.
[00:13:36]  To which I responded, that's like hearing the lyrics to N-Words in Paris and being like, Is that a Taylor Swift song?
[00:13:41]  Yeah, I don't know.
[00:13:43]  We all go through different eras in our music.
[00:13:45]  I don't know.
[00:13:46]  So, anyway, come on, keep shit on me.
[00:13:47]  It made like sexy music.
[00:13:48]  Okay, so I was listening to Greg.
[00:13:49]  I was like, You want to hear?
[00:13:51]  Okay, you want to hear what I thought about the like where I went with that George Michael thing?
[00:13:56]  I was like, like, since, like, boom, I wanna fuck you like an animal.
[00:14:02]  Like, that's what I'm saying.
[00:14:03]  That's what I thought that is George Michaels.
[00:14:06]  This is what gay people are facing.
[00:14:07]  Yeah, this is what gay people are facing.
[00:14:09]  I just thought that could be like we need to take the F-slur and just start calling you it.
[00:14:14]  I think, okay, that's problematic, but we'll workshop.
[00:14:18]  What do you think?
[00:14:19]  What do you mean?
[00:14:21]  I'm just we will workshop that one.
[00:14:23]  What do you think?
[00:14:24]  Okay, I think we need to start calling him.
[00:14:27]  We might have to go back to the kitchen.
[00:14:29]  But the Austin socket doesn't end there.
[00:14:31]  Okay.
[00:14:32]  So we go, we work out in the morning.
[00:14:35]  He's like, I want to do cardio and I want to do my arms.
[00:14:38]  I was like, fuck no.
[00:14:39]  You're going to the gym with me.
[00:14:41]  They're going to make you do deadlifts.
[00:14:42]  And they fucking did.
[00:14:44]  And they did.
[00:14:44]  And we bullied him.
[00:14:46]  All of them bullied me in like spectacularly homophobic fashion.
[00:14:50]  I'm not going to lie.
[00:14:51]  I welcome that because now you're going to work out with me.
[00:14:54]  Yes, because I want to do arm day.
[00:14:57]  Superior gym practices.
[00:14:59]  Yes.
[00:14:59]  One.
[00:15:00]  We're not working out in the morning.
[00:15:01]  No.
[00:15:01]  That's for weirdos.
[00:15:02]  Yes.
[00:15:03]  Two.
[00:15:03]  He works out in the morning.
[00:15:04]  We do arm against every single day.
[00:15:06]  Yes.
[00:15:08]  What is it?
[00:15:08]  Every single day?
[00:15:09]  Arms, baby.
[00:15:10]  Arms.
[00:15:10]  Oh, yeah.
[00:15:10]  I mean, that's the rich piano technique.
[00:15:12]  Eight hours.
[00:15:12]  Well, this is the thing.
[00:15:13]  He's like, interrupted.
[00:15:14]  I don't care.
[00:15:15]  I mean, you care about getting strong.
[00:15:16]  You care about getting strong.
[00:15:17]  I don't give a fuck about getting strong.
[00:15:19]  I like it.
[00:15:20]  I want to look good.
[00:15:21]  Good, naked.
[00:15:22]  You do.
[00:15:22]  Exactly.
[00:15:23]  I know I do, but I want to look better naked.
[00:15:25]  Okay, right.
[00:15:26]  Regardless.
[00:15:26]  Have you seen anyone?
[00:15:27]  You see me.
[00:15:28]  Never mind.
[00:15:29]  No, never seen me.
[00:15:30]  We've seen the fans leave.
[00:15:31]  Yeah, we've seen the fans.
[00:15:33]  I got to support my friend.
[00:15:34]  Are you subscribed?
[00:15:34]  I got to support my friends.
[00:15:35]  Come on.
[00:15:36]  I need you to tip a little bit more than that, come on.
[00:15:40]  We tip you by.
[00:15:41]  It's a Turkish lyric.
[00:15:42]  That's up.
[00:15:43]  We tip you by letting you be on the podcast.
[00:15:46]  That's right.
[00:15:46]  He was going to get you a palette of Zin.
[00:15:48]  That's right.
[00:15:50]  That's right.
[00:15:50]  So At the end of the broadcast, we were going to go to this event that was being put together to raise money for Lebanon and Gaza.
[00:16:03]  Sure.
[00:16:03]  Right.
[00:16:05]  And he brought his Lebanese friend to say.
[00:16:07]  And I was like, Austin, you say you're fucking Lebanese.
[00:16:09]  Like, you have to come to this.
[00:16:10]  And he's like, sure, why not?
[00:16:12]  Let's do it.
[00:16:13]  We get there.
[00:16:14]  It's in like Boyle Heights or something, which is very far.
[00:16:17]  It's like East LA, 45 minutes, even without traffic.
[00:16:20]  It's like far as fuck.
[00:16:21]  We get there at exactly like 7.10.
[00:16:25]  The event, the doors open at 7.
[00:16:28]  The event actually.
[00:16:30]  Okay, this is PTSD from yesterday.
[00:16:33]  I'm going to get to why he's being jumpy in a second.
[00:16:35]  The event doesn't start till 8, and I don't go up till 9.15.
[00:16:41]  I was like, fuck.
[00:16:42]  I came in too early.
[00:16:44]  He fucked it up.
[00:16:45]  So we just kind of sit there and we're waiting in the green room, whatever.
[00:16:49]  The event starts.
[00:16:51]  We start listening.
[00:16:52]  We start watching the event.
[00:16:53]  And Austin's a little panicky already because there's no security.
[00:16:57]  And he had asked me prior.
[00:16:58]  He's like, is there going to be security?
[00:16:59]  And I was like, yeah, sure.
[00:17:01]  There's no security at the event.
[00:17:03]  And he's like worried already.
[00:17:06]  We're sitting.
[00:17:07]  We're sitting in the fucking green room.
[00:17:09]  And then while we're hanging out, a massive fucking boom.
[00:17:14]  And the entire warehouse that we're inside of, this is like a DIY music place.
[00:17:19]  Like they do like DIY music events for indie artists and stuff.
[00:17:23]  The entire warehouse shaked.
[00:17:25]  Yeah.
[00:17:25]  So immediately I jump up.
[00:17:27]  It's an assassination attempt on Hassan Piker.
[00:17:30]  He thought like this is some like some pro-Israel guy knew the event was happening and like tried to get the ball.
[00:17:38]  To be honest, it could have been a lot of different groups of people.
[00:17:41]  Okay.
[00:17:42]  Yeah.
[00:17:43]  It's one of those weird instances where it's like, it could be a Nazi.
[00:17:46]  It could be pro-Israel.
[00:17:48]  It could be Republicans.
[00:17:50]  My aunt.
[00:17:51]  Yeah.
[00:17:51]  Nah, your aunt loves me.
[00:17:53]  Your aunt loves me.
[00:17:54]  My name is Hank and your aunt loves me.
[00:17:55]  Anyway.
[00:17:56]  Diva queueing on Aunt 2?
[00:17:57]  No, no, she's not QAnon.
[00:17:59]  Not QAN.
[00:17:59]  She's an old school Republican, though.
[00:18:01]  But in any case, we're obviously a little shook by it.
[00:18:05]  Like, I also thought, like, I didn't discount that it could be potentially someone who was actually trying to do like an act of violence against a pro-Palestinian rally.
[00:18:17]  Turns out that's not the case.
[00:18:19]  It was some fucking drunk guy.
[00:18:21]  Okay.
[00:18:22]  It was some fucking drunk guy who drove his like Nissan juke or whatever into another car and then slammed into the fucking wall of the building that we're in.
[00:18:32]  Actually made it into the building, by the way.
[00:18:35]  There was no one in that room specifically.
[00:18:38]  Apparently he gets out of his car.
[00:18:41]  He's unconscious for a little bit and the car is like inside the building.
[00:18:44]  I don't know how the fuck he survived this hit.
[00:18:45]  It was direct.
[00:18:46]  Like streaming on kick at the time?
[00:18:49]  Jack Doherty?
[00:18:50]  His name is Jack Doherty.
[00:18:52]  We'll get to that in a second.
[00:18:53]  No, he gets out of the car.
[00:18:55]  His homie is following him.
[00:18:57]  He's also drunk.
[00:18:58]  They just drunk, drive away.
[00:19:00]  That's wild.
[00:19:01]  Yeah.
[00:19:02]  So I'm sure that made Austin feel very safe.
[00:19:04]  Oh, yeah.
[00:19:05]  Yeah.
[00:19:06]  No, Austin.
[00:19:07]  So he was already prompted.
[00:19:08]  Let me set the scene.
[00:19:09]  Okay.
[00:19:09]  Fucking car hits the building.
[00:19:11]  Building fucking shakes.
[00:19:12]  Immediately I hit the floor.
[00:19:14]  Assassination attempt, right?
[00:19:16]  I'm like, oh my God, it's over.
[00:19:18]  Right.
[00:19:18]  The door's open.
[00:19:19]  I'm like, fucking close that door.
[00:19:20]  Lock it.
[00:19:21]  I'm looking at the security cameras.
[00:19:22]  It looks good.
[00:19:23]  All right.
[00:19:23]  I go walk outside.
[00:19:24]  Pop, pop, pop, pop.
[00:19:26]  Fireworks.
[00:19:27]  Sound like gunshots, right?
[00:19:29]  He's like, I'm already on edge.
[00:19:31]  Hassan fucking Piker walks in there like a sitting duck.
[00:19:34]  300 people, no fucking security.
[00:19:36]  All right.
[00:19:36]  I'm in the back of the room looking for the nearest exit.
[00:19:40]  For me, he was like freaking out.
[00:19:41]  Every time fireworks exploded, I was like, Austin, it's fireworks.
[00:19:45]  And even if it's like gunshots, like they're not shooting at you, bro.
[00:19:47]  Don't worry about it.
[00:19:48]  Okay.
[00:19:49]  Hassan.
[00:19:50]  This is what's crazy.
[00:19:52]  He's like, even if it is gunshots, they're not aiming for you.
[00:19:56]  He's resigned himself to this for a while.
[00:19:59]  I think you might be broken.
[00:20:01]  I think that I have a very healthy attitude.
[00:20:04]  No, you do not.
[00:20:05]  You are so unhealthy when it comes to that.
[00:20:08]  The reason why I say the reason why I say I think I have a very healthy attitude about this stuff is because, like, if I was as panicky as you are, I would not be able to, with the amount of enemies I have, with the amount of death threats I get, with the amount of like things that happen that I won't elaborate on, you know, any further publicly, like, I would not be able to exist unless I was like very, you know, whatever happens, happens.
[00:20:34]  Which for all these reasons is why you should be safe.
[00:20:37]  There's probably a middle ground there.
[00:20:39]  Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
[00:20:40]  It'll be all right.
[00:20:41]  I can handle myself.
[00:20:42]  Yeah, he's a big boy is what he told me last year.
[00:20:43]  Yeah, I was like, I'm a big boy.
[00:20:44]  I'll be all right.
[00:20:45]  Well, don't drag me into it, for God's sake.
[00:20:48]  But it was really funny how much you were panicking.
[00:20:51]  Will and I both would have been panicking.
[00:20:53]  No, I don't think I'd be able to get it.
[00:20:54]  I would have gone Jason Bourne.
[00:20:56]  I would have disappeared.
[00:20:57]  I don't mean that.
[00:20:59]  I would have ushered the women and children out.
[00:21:02]  Yeah, would you have left the event at that point?
[00:21:06]  Yeah, I wouldn't have stuck around.
[00:21:08]  I did.
[00:21:08]  I stuck around.
[00:21:08]  I sat there like a good friend in the bag.
[00:21:11]  Yeah.
[00:21:12]  I donated to the charity.
[00:21:13]  I think when there's a car in the venue.

=== Fifth Grade Panic Moments (11:03) ===

[00:21:16]  Yeah.
[00:21:16]  I think that's my hour.
[00:21:18]  No, we did it.
[00:21:19]  Because we were speculating because it was a big building and the car hit the opposite side of the building.
[00:21:22]  So I was like, oh, shit, they missed.
[00:21:24]  That is a good story.
[00:21:25]  But watch it.
[00:21:26]  They hit the wrong side.
[00:21:27]  Watch what a sleepless podcast I am.
[00:21:29]  Ooh, we have a guest still.
[00:21:30]  And we didn't finish our conversation about Fortnite Friday.
[00:21:33]  That's true.
[00:21:34]  And I actually had a segment ready.
[00:21:36]  I'm going to fix some stuff for all you get the segment ready.
[00:21:38]  We're going to go get it.
[00:21:39]  No, we're going to pause because I want you to participate.
[00:21:43]  That's fine.
[00:21:44]  That's fine.
[00:21:45]  Oh, she looks so sad.
[00:21:47]  What does she have?
[00:21:48]  Is that a pig heel?
[00:21:51]  She just wants attention.
[00:21:54]  You know?
[00:21:55]  A big heel.
[00:21:56]  You know what?
[00:21:56]  That's what they give.
[00:21:57]  Exactly what they do in Minnesota.
[00:21:59]  Yeah.
[00:21:59]  I'm not from Minnesota.
[00:22:00]  Oh, wait, really?
[00:22:01]  I'm from Oregon.
[00:22:02]  My dad's from Minnesota.
[00:22:04]  Marsh looks dead.
[00:22:05]  Are you dead, Marsh?
[00:22:06]  Great story, Hassan.
[00:22:08]  But I want to take us back to what we were talking about earlier because we have guests today.
[00:22:11]  That's right.
[00:22:11]  And I haven't stopped talking about Fortnite Friday because I love it.
[00:22:14]  And I actually prepared a game that I want to play where each one of us, I want you to create a scenario in which the person you would like to interview and the game you would play.
[00:22:25]  Now, we know you would probably do Flight Simulator, but I want to start with Connor.
[00:22:30]  Connor, who are you looking at it in the future?
[00:22:32]  Like, who's like the dream guest for it?
[00:22:34]  Who are the dream gets?
[00:22:36]  Rudy Giuliani was up there, but I don't want to do like...
[00:22:40]  My next one, I don't want to be a political episode because I feel like it's getting a political connotation.
[00:22:44]  Playing Monopoly with Rudy Giuliani would go.
[00:22:47]  Yeah, that's a great idea.
[00:22:48]  What about the Mike Pillow guy?
[00:22:50]  Yeah, so like Mike Mundell's on there too.
[00:22:52]  But again, like I'm trying to like space out these so like they're not all political because if like it gets like too much of a political connotation, I can't get 2K with Hulk Hogan.
[00:22:59]  Yeah, I mean that's great too, but like I want to stick to Fortnite primarily.
[00:23:02]  What about Kid Rock?
[00:23:03]  Kid Rock, dude.
[00:23:04]  You see, these are all great ideas.
[00:23:05]  But they're all political?
[00:23:06]  Exactly.
[00:23:07]  Like I'm trying, I need the next one at least.
[00:23:09]  I need to not be that.
[00:23:11]  I don't know.
[00:23:11]  Like Justin Bieber is like one that I would say because like I feel like if like you're my age, like he's always going to be like the celebrity.
[00:23:17]  Oprah.
[00:23:18]  Yeah.
[00:23:18]  Oprah.
[00:23:19]  Oprah as well is great.
[00:23:20]  That'd be a good get.
[00:23:21]  I mean, there's just so many.
[00:23:22]  That'd be a great get.
[00:23:23]  There's so many options.
[00:23:24]  Bill Gates.
[00:23:24]  Like Miranda Cosgrove.
[00:23:26]  I think it'd be a great one as the guy that does can the science guy.
[00:23:30]  Bill Nye.
[00:23:31]  No, no, Neil deGrasse Tyson.
[00:23:36]  Neil deGrasse isn't the science guy.
[00:23:39]  Well, he is.
[00:23:40]  No, Bill Nye is the science guy.
[00:23:43]  If that was title healed, his name is literally Bill Nye.
[00:23:47]  Crazy, you guys thought of the white guy first.
[00:23:50]  That was a real nice thing.
[00:23:52]  No, he's the science guy.
[00:23:54]  No, I refuse.
[00:23:56]  His name is Bill Nye.
[00:23:58]  He's science guy.
[00:24:00]  All I'm saying is when I thought of the science guy, I thought of Neil deGrasse Tyson.
[00:24:03]  Really?
[00:24:04]  Because he's an astrophysicist, not a science guy.
[00:24:07]  Is astrophysicist?
[00:24:08]  Isn't that science?
[00:24:09]  That's funny that he's not known as a science guy.
[00:24:11]  So you don't think he's a scientist because he's black?
[00:24:13]  No, what?
[00:24:14]  See, I flipped it on you, motherfucker.
[00:24:16]  I did think he was a scientist.
[00:24:18]  That blade cuts two ways.
[00:24:19]  No, I just wait.
[00:24:20]  Astrophysicists is science, isn't it?
[00:24:23]  Yes.
[00:24:23]  Austin, what are you doing with that paper?
[00:24:28]  Leave me alone.
[00:24:29]  I got nervous as hell.
[00:24:30]  See, when I was in high school, they wouldn't, like, I had a whole science class, like a day dedicated to my teacher telling us, like, trying to refute a Neil deGrasse Tyson video on like atheism.
[00:24:38]  Yeah, you're your high school's awesome.
[00:24:40]  Yeah, you got taught the true education.
[00:24:42]  Yeah, I got like private Christian education.
[00:24:44]  Like, some of it was okay.
[00:24:45]  Some of it was crazy.
[00:24:46]  Like, I remember like in like fifth grade, like, it was, we were learning about like 9-11.
[00:24:51]  It was that time of year.
[00:24:52]  And, like, a kid like raises his hand and like repeats something that he must have heard from like his dad or something at home.
[00:24:57]  He goes, Is it true that like no Jewish people died on 9-11?
[00:25:01]  And I'm sitting in the class and I'm like kind of your teacher was like, Yes.
[00:25:06]  Well, my team, my teacher was like, No, no, no.
[00:25:08]  Like, she like picked up like probably what he had heard.
[00:25:10]  And she was like, No, no, that's not the case.
[00:25:12]  Another kid in the class goes, like, no, that wouldn't make sense because aren't they like God's chosen people?
[00:25:18]  Like, he would protect them.
[00:25:20]  And then all the kids in the class were like, That actually adds up.
[00:25:22]  Like, maybe the no, maybe no Jews did die in 9-11.
[00:25:25]  That's awesome that they arrived at an anti-Semitic conspiracy, but in a, in a philosophic way.
[00:25:30]  Yeah, they were like, that's how a lot of it goes.
[00:25:31]  Because, like, a lot of evangelical Christians are like, yeah, they're God's chosen people.
[00:25:35]  They got to do Israel.
[00:25:36]  Like, they have to do that, but also simultaneously.
[00:25:38]  How old were you?
[00:25:40]  I was fifth grade.
[00:25:41]  Did you realize how crazy this was at the time?
[00:25:43]  Yeah.
[00:25:43]  So, like, my realization of how crazy what I'm around came in the 2008 election.
[00:25:47]  Because we did like a mock election in our school, and we had like 80 people at the time.
[00:25:52]  And I was the, I voted for Obama solely because I thought his name sounded funny.
[00:25:56]  Yeah.
[00:25:56]  And then the only other person in a grade that voted for the only black kid in our grade.
[00:26:02]  So wait, you looked at that and you were like, these motherfuckers like John McCain.
[00:26:05]  He doesn't.
[00:26:06]  So we left that day and I was like, wow, McCain's going to sweep this year.
[00:26:09]  I was like, 78 to 2.
[00:26:10]  That's crazy.
[00:26:11]  I remember debating Mormon women in fifth grade during the John Kerry Bush election.
[00:26:18]  Wow.
[00:26:18]  It's really exciting, dude.
[00:26:19]  Yeah.
[00:26:24]  Who would you play video games with?
[00:26:26]  I mean, for me, there's so many guests that I would love to have.
[00:26:29]  Obviously, Bill Burr is like the number one.
[00:26:32]  I want you in the style of Fortnite Fridays.
[00:26:34]  In the style of Fortnite Fridays, I think, like.
[00:26:37]  Let's make it clear.
[00:26:38]  It's Fortnite Friday.
[00:26:39]  I keep the S off of it.
[00:26:40]  Just for branding purposes.
[00:26:41]  Let's just for days.
[00:26:45]  Marsh, you are supposed to correct me.
[00:26:48]  Don't you ever make me stupid.
[00:26:50]  You know, I just stole that from Keemstar, too.
[00:26:52]  What?
[00:26:53]  Just took it from Keemstar.
[00:26:54]  Oh, you did?
[00:26:55]  He used to do a thing called Fortnite Friday, but he stopped it because he tried to monetize it too heavily and like Fortnite got mad at him.
[00:27:00]  It had to be like something featuring Fortnite.
[00:27:03]  So I just remember that.
[00:27:04]  Are they going to get mad at you?
[00:27:05]  You're like a league or something?
[00:27:06]  No, because I mean, I don't see, I don't take my job too seriously.
[00:27:08]  I just try to make people laugh.
[00:27:10]  Like, if I monetize it, sure.
[00:27:11]  But like, I mean, I just try to break even and be happy.
[00:27:14]  But like, the uh, yeah, so I just took his logo.
[00:27:17]  In the style of Fortnite Friday, okay.
[00:27:22]  I don't think this fosters a lot of good discussion in the way that like playing Fortnite does, especially because like you're playing with people that are playing Fortnite for the first time ever usually.
[00:27:31]  So it's a low ELO lobby.
[00:27:33]  You're cooking.
[00:27:33]  Dude, that's part of the reason why it works so well, too.
[00:27:36]  You're ripping these bots.
[00:27:37]  It's awesome, right?
[00:27:38]  Yeah, it looks so sick.
[00:27:40]  It's genuinely like for ADHD, it's like stimulation.
[00:27:43]  Like it's like helping me like interview because I'm just like brainlessly like sleeping this live the whole time.
[00:27:49]  Yeah.
[00:27:50]  So I don't know what game would be really good for that.
[00:27:53]  Like I don't know what what fosters a healthy discussion in the vein of Fortnite for me, but I would want to play, I probably want to play Elden Ring.
[00:28:03]  Okay.
[00:28:03]  I like that.
[00:28:04]  Elden Ring co-op.
[00:28:06]  Yes.
[00:28:06]  Elden Ring Co-op with Chapel Roan.
[00:28:09]  Ooh.
[00:28:10]  Yeah.
[00:28:10]  That one at Chapel Roanoke.
[00:28:11]  I feel like Chapel Ron would be good on Fortnite Friday.
[00:28:13]  That's been one I've been trying to see.
[00:28:15]  Okay.
[00:28:15]  Okay, Connor.
[00:28:16]  This is my Fortnite Friday equivalent.
[00:28:18]  I don't know.
[00:28:18]  I feel like I could.
[00:28:19]  Why Chapel Rone?
[00:28:20]  I don't know.
[00:28:20]  I feel like she'd be chill.
[00:28:23]  She feels like in touch with like shit.
[00:28:25]  Her bestie is a huge, huge Hasanabe head, like massive Hasanabe head.
[00:28:31]  And I've asked.
[00:28:33]  We can't.
[00:28:34]  Wait, why?
[00:28:35]  She said no?
[00:28:36]  Well, I mean, I didn't.
[00:28:38]  You asked her?
[00:28:38]  I asked her bestie, and she was like, it's not up to me.
[00:28:42]  And I respect that.
[00:28:44]  That's not a no.
[00:28:46]  We could still ask.
[00:28:48]  I don't want to be pushy, Austin.
[00:28:50]  You definitely don't ask for a moment.
[00:28:51]  Give me your number.
[00:28:53]  I'll be pushy.
[00:28:54]  I'll be like, that's actually true.
[00:28:56]  I should try the Connor Eats Pants technique that he used successfully on Haley Welch.
[00:29:02]  Dude, I don't even know that's successful.
[00:29:03]  I should get him.
[00:29:06]  If you don't answer my DM, I'm going to drive my car into the median 21,000 lives.
[00:29:12]  That is awesome, dude.
[00:29:13]  It was awesome.
[00:29:14]  He said he's going to kill himself if Haley Welsh, the Hawk Tua girl, doesn't respond to him.
[00:29:18]  Listen, humor and freedom of speech is allowed on X.
[00:29:21]  So you can do whatever you want.
[00:29:22]  Also being completely serious.
[00:29:24]  Exactly.
[00:29:25]  But no, when she got back to me, it was like one of the few times when I applied to her that I think it was actually her tweeting because it was like her talking about the SNL thing about her.
[00:29:33]  And so that then she saw it and she replied because usually it's like definitely her management.
[00:29:37]  Because if you look at her Twitter, it's absurd.
[00:29:39]  Like it's like AI generated memes of her Photoshopped and like replying to like Dogecoin crypto stuff.
[00:29:45]  Like it's very like coordinated.
[00:29:48]  So then she DM me and was like, yeah, no, this sounds like a great idea.
[00:29:50]  I would love to do this.
[00:29:52]  And like sent me like her manager's like email and stuff.
[00:29:56]  And then once I emailed her managers, suddenly the account went back to like only applying to like crypto and stuff.
[00:30:01]  She wouldn't reply to a message anymore.
[00:30:02]  And I was like, oh my God, like they stopped her.
[00:30:04]  They're keeping her away from like they don't want you.
[00:30:07]  They don't want talk to a Fortnite Friday collab to happen.
[00:30:10]  It will shock the world.
[00:30:12]  Yeah.
[00:30:12]  I don't know.
[00:30:12]  Well, like she signed a kick deal immediately after.
[00:30:14]  So I was like.
[00:30:15]  Yeah.
[00:30:16]  Ready?
[00:30:16]  Here's mine that I want to do.
[00:30:18]  Okay.
[00:30:18]  Quentin Tarantino playing Ghosts of Shishima.
[00:30:23]  Yes.
[00:30:25]  Just let him go.
[00:30:26]  Yeah.
[00:30:26]  Just let him make speed does that.
[00:30:29]  Well, we could come in.
[00:30:31]  I feel like Elden Ring would work for Dursefeet.
[00:30:33]  Yeah.
[00:30:33]  Dursefeet known.
[00:30:35]  I got a really good one.
[00:30:36]  Okay.
[00:30:37]  I'm serious.
[00:30:38]  Shut up, Austin.
[00:30:39]  We're going to get to the ad now.
[00:30:40]  Oh.
[00:30:41]  Will, did you know that I am a Shopify user?
[00:30:45]  I didn't know that.
[00:30:46]  That's right.
[00:30:47]  The ideology.shop merch actually runs through the Shopify website and application.
[00:30:54]  I love that merch.
[00:30:55]  Yeah.
[00:30:55]  And you could also upgrade your business and get the same checkout we use with Shopify.
[00:31:02]  Cha-Ching.
[00:31:04]  Cha-Ching.
[00:31:06]  Integrating the Shopify Cha-Ching sound effect.
[00:31:09]  I like what you did there.
[00:31:10]  How do I do it, Hassan?
[00:31:11]  You sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash fear all lowercase.
[00:31:19]  Go to shopify.com slash fear to upgrade your selling today.
[00:31:23]  That's shopify.com slash fear.
[00:31:26]  Wait a minute, Hassan.
[00:31:27]  You're telling me that if I go to shopify.fear, I can.
[00:31:32]  Shopify.com slash fear.
[00:31:33]  Okay, thank you for correcting me.
[00:31:35]  I'm dyslexic.
[00:31:36]  I can get a month for a dollar.
[00:31:38]  That's right.
[00:31:39]  On your trial period.
[00:31:40]  Holy shit.
[00:31:42]  Way when you get to start up your small business, or if you have a merch line or if you have an ETSY shop or something like that yeah, you can integrate it into shopify and then check your uh, check all your sales in real time.
[00:31:55]  Wow, as I do when I do merch runs.
[00:32:00]  You were saying I got a really good one.
[00:32:02]  Okay, i'm serious.
[00:32:04]  Yeah, Frankie Valley.
[00:32:05]  No, Elton John.
[00:32:06]  Yes, we tennis.
[00:32:08]  Oh, I think that would be a really good one.
[00:32:15]  I feel like we'd have such a good time and he kind of where he wear he has kind of a tennis fit.

=== Right-Wing Podcast Shifts (03:02) ===

[00:32:19]  Yeah, always see, the thing about all this is this is why Fortnite Friday is I i'm proud of the concept is, I think, like Fortnite just works better than all these games anyways, for like these guests, because the, like fortnight as a whole is so recognizable to people, even if you don't play it.
[00:32:33]  Yeah, that like the and like the, how you win and what you do, is easily understandable.
[00:32:37]  Um, whereas like Elden Ring, like if you're watching it, like a lot of people just win that with the hell.
[00:32:41]  Yeah no, I know, that's why I said it was a bad.
[00:32:43]  No, I know, i'm just explaining like, why Fortnite friday works, I think, and like the uh, like the sort of like the skins in the game and stuff, it just adds a lot to it.
[00:32:50]  Yeah, Shaq really added to your last.
[00:32:52]  Like it's the background humor.
[00:32:54]  Shaq really gave you an alley oop on that one.
[00:32:56]  Speaking of, speaking of, talk to I do.
[00:32:59]  I do want to come clean about something.
[00:33:01]  I'm a little bit spread on that.
[00:33:03]  Yeah, I was like i'm a little bit.
[00:33:04]  No, don't say that.
[00:33:06]  No okay, I saw a tick tock last night of someone celebrating the fact that Joe Rogan was finally dethroned from the top spotify podcast, right.
[00:33:18]  So I was like, oh my god, there's a new number one podcast on spotify finally, and to me that's like whatever it was.
[00:33:25]  Uh, it was some like ex-cia guy and an ex-cop, I think Sean, Something whatever, right.
[00:33:31]  So that's not.
[00:33:31]  That's not what disappointed me or made me sad.
[00:33:34]  What I found out is that I went on a little journey and found I looked at all the other top podcasts on spotify.
[00:33:43]  Number one is Sean Ryan show.
[00:33:45]  Number two is the Joe Rogan Experience.
[00:33:47]  Number three is Candace by Candace Owens.
[00:33:51]  Number four is the Tucker Carlson show.
[00:33:53]  Number five is some podcast called Chains FR on spotify.
[00:33:56]  I think it's like actually animated.
[00:33:58]  If i'm not mistaken, number six is the Daily BY THE NEW YORK Times and number seven is Talk to a with Haley.
[00:34:04]  Welch sure.
[00:34:05]  And the reason why this was so disappointing and I dove a little bit further into this to look at like the Apple podcast on the news segment is that every single top podcast is like right-wing it's either center right or just insanely far right.
[00:34:21]  It turns out that when you make your rhetoric some twisted hated fantasy land yeah, we could do that.
[00:34:29]  So yeah, that's my, that's my top podcast, that's my suggestion.
[00:34:32]  Fear, and we're doing a right wing pivot, we should.
[00:34:35]  I know we've said no politics, but I think it's time.
[00:34:37]  Can I still sit here?
[00:34:38]  I think you need a gay man.
[00:34:39]  That's right.
[00:34:39]  When you say that no, you said no politics for sure, that's like half of what we talked about for that.
[00:34:43]  Is that just because Kitty's not here?
[00:34:45]  No, it's because you did Fortnite friday, which is why we've uh, talked a little bit about politics.
[00:34:50]  But normally, this is why I need a different guest.
[00:34:52]  No, hold on, you're doing the damn political.
[00:34:54]  You're capitulating to the right.
[00:34:56]  No, I'm trying to.
[00:34:58]  I am trying to capitulate to the right.
[00:35:00]  This is a right-wing podcast going forward.
[00:35:02]  We should be.
[00:35:03]  No, you should do Lex Friedman.
[00:35:04]  Like you're a center.
[00:35:05]  You're having conversations.
[00:35:06]  He's not up on that fucking leaderboard.
[00:35:08]  I don't know where the fuck he is.
[00:35:10]  Conspiracy theory podcast.
[00:35:11]  Yeah, we need to go forward.
[00:35:12]  That brings me to my next point.
[00:35:15]  We were supposed to do something this week.
[00:35:18]  Dodgers game.
[00:35:18]  We were supposed to go to a Doctor's game.
[00:35:20]  And we could have watched something historically.

=== Politics on the Circuit (13:22) ===

[00:35:22]  You know what's amazing to me?
[00:35:24]  I realized that none of the other people on this show realize how professional sports work because you were all like, oh, can we do, can we do Wednesday?
[00:35:35]  And I was like, that's not when the game is.
[00:35:37]  That's not what I said.
[00:35:38]  And then people were like, what about Thursday?
[00:35:39]  Can we do like, can we do that date?
[00:35:42]  And I was like, no, no, no.
[00:35:43]  You don't understand.
[00:35:44]  This is playoff baseball.
[00:35:46]  And they're like, what about in a few weeks from now?
[00:35:47]  And I'm like.
[00:35:49]  Okay, can we?
[00:35:50]  I was looking at this.
[00:35:52]  Give me credit.
[00:35:52]  I said I was down.
[00:35:53]  Yes.
[00:35:54]  I literally said I was down.
[00:35:56]  Except Sunday night.
[00:35:57]  I said I was down, which whenever you want to do it, I was going to, I was actually thinking about like texting you privately and being like, fuck these guys.
[00:36:05]  Let's just go together.
[00:36:07]  That's crazy.
[00:36:08]  Oh, I wanted to do the nine nine and nine challenge.
[00:36:12]  Oh, you go to a baseball club and you must consume nine hot dogs and drink nine beers in nine innings.
[00:36:19]  Okay.
[00:36:19]  But you have to finish your beer and your hot dog before the end of it.
[00:36:22]  Easiest fucking challenge of my humorous bleed out of your pores.
[00:36:29]  The easiest challenge of myself.
[00:36:31]  Look like a humble.
[00:36:32]  I would fall in.
[00:36:34]  I saw this man eat yesterday.
[00:36:36]  Yeah, bro.
[00:36:36]  You down like nine pizzas.
[00:36:38]  Did we all forget about the Doug Doug Eating Challenge?
[00:36:40]  What is this?
[00:36:41]  Oh, you think you want to do that?
[00:36:43]  Doug Doug Eating Challenge.
[00:36:45]  He starts.
[00:36:46]  Have you ever done a Zen?
[00:36:47]  No.
[00:36:47]  You want to actually start spinning and throwing up.
[00:36:51]  He'll throw up if he tries the six.
[00:36:52]  Wait, really?
[00:36:53]  That's good.
[00:36:54]  I don't want to try any.
[00:36:55]  That's a fat Zen.
[00:36:56]  I don't think I can do nicotine.
[00:36:58]  Anyway, go ahead.
[00:36:59]  Will.
[00:37:00]  Sorry.
[00:37:00]  Yeah, but my dreams came tumbling down.
[00:37:02]  So I have decided to extend an olive branch to the Fear End podcast because I wanted to do an American Me Up episode.
[00:37:11]  And instead of that, we're doing.
[00:37:13]  Please go to joe toy.com and then type in the RX782 Gundam suit.
[00:37:20]  Oh, yes.
[00:37:22]  Yes.
[00:37:23]  So I have decided to make up for the pain and suffering that you have caused me.
[00:37:28]  The content of our upcoming episodes, probably 12 weeks from now, based on the time it will take for them to fabricate the suit, is just going to be me and a gundam suit that you guys buy me.
[00:37:38]  I think we should take it out of Hassan's paycheck.
[00:37:40]  I agree with that.
[00:37:41]  What the fuck?
[00:37:42]  No.
[00:37:43]  We need to start.
[00:37:44]  No.
[00:37:44]  You need to claim that check before we start spending.
[00:37:46]  I think take a look.
[00:37:48]  Holy shit.
[00:37:49]  Yeah, that's a wearable Gundam suit.
[00:37:50]  Are you?
[00:37:51]  Okay, that's fucking sick.
[00:37:53]  Yeah.
[00:37:53]  It's also like low-key, cheaper than I thought it would be.
[00:37:58]  Now, there is a deal if we get two of them.
[00:38:01]  If you wanted to get a Gundam suit as well.
[00:38:03]  Is they gonna are they gonna be able to make it my size?
[00:38:09]  Is that a Space Marine?
[00:38:10]  They can make that one as well.
[00:38:11]  That's the standard issue Gundam suit.
[00:38:14]  Oh, that's the green one is the standard issue Gundam suit?
[00:38:17]  Yes.
[00:38:17]  Yes.
[00:38:18]  Oh, I thought it was like it looks like miniatures that like they're so awesome.
[00:38:24]  So we are all in agreement.
[00:38:25]  The podcast is Warhammer.
[00:38:27]  They have Warhammer Space Marine.
[00:38:29]  So we are all in agreement that we are all buying giant mech suits.
[00:38:32]  Can they do Warhammer Space Marine for all of us going to Gundam for you and we still take advantage of that deal or no?
[00:38:38]  Yeah.
[00:38:39]  I'm not sure they're at.
[00:38:41]  Can I be Iron Man?
[00:38:42]  I was just saying that.
[00:38:42]  But yes, I like where you're going with this.
[00:38:45]  We all buy suits.
[00:38:49]  Yes.
[00:38:49]  Well, you can be Master Chief.
[00:38:51]  It was StarCraft Terran Marine cosplay armor and it's 5,300.
[00:38:57]  Yes.
[00:38:58]  Yes.
[00:38:58]  I wanted to get a fire bat, if you know what a firebat is, the red armor.
[00:39:01]  They also have the Jim Rayner.
[00:39:02]  You have to go to like a fitting.
[00:39:04]  You have to send in all your measurements.
[00:39:07]  But I think that somehow this would be an episode.
[00:39:11]  And I think it's way funnier if Cutie doesn't know that we're doing it.
[00:39:16]  Oh, yeah.
[00:39:17]  And one day we just all show up in suits of armor.
[00:39:20]  And we go.
[00:39:21]  We get here and she walks into this because she'll be late.
[00:39:23]  Yes.
[00:39:24]  And she'll, and we'll just be sitting here.
[00:39:27]  I know suits of armor.
[00:39:28]  Are we going to be able to sit in this video?
[00:39:29]  No, no, no.
[00:39:30]  That's part of the problem.
[00:39:31]  That doesn't matter.
[00:39:32]  No.
[00:39:32]  What matters is the look of disgust on Cutie's face because she won't listen to this.
[00:39:36]  No, she won't.
[00:39:36]  She has no idea.
[00:39:37]  No, she has no idea.
[00:39:37]  The look of disgust when she comes in and it's like almost you missed a memo.
[00:39:41]  Yeah.
[00:39:41]  And all of your co-hosts are like, where's your suit?
[00:39:44]  One of two things that she's going to.
[00:39:47]  It would be an $8,000 joke that would be well worth it.
[00:39:49]  Either we're going to surprise her or she's going to get this clip and react to it and it's going to end up on her TikTok.
[00:39:54]  No way.
[00:39:55]  No, she will not.
[00:39:56]  Okay.
[00:39:57]  I like this website a lot.
[00:39:59]  There's a lot of cool shit on here.
[00:40:01]  Yeah.
[00:40:02]  See, look at Will.
[00:40:03]  Maybe I should start monetizing Fortnite Friday, Mario.
[00:40:06]  You too could buy a Gundam.
[00:40:07]  I need to start doing my job better.
[00:40:09]  They have Common Riders and Ultraman as well.
[00:40:13]  I mean, follow me on this one.
[00:40:14]  Yeah.
[00:40:15]  Hawk Tua episode.
[00:40:17]  Yeah.
[00:40:18]  But she's wearing gussets.
[00:40:19]  All right.
[00:40:20]  Listen, you got great ideas.
[00:40:21]  See what I'm doing here?
[00:40:22]  I'm living in the future.
[00:40:24]  Have you watched any of the Hawk Tua podcasts?
[00:40:26]  Yeah, on Tuesdays, I've been doing Talk Tua's days.
[00:40:29]  Okay, so, oh my God.
[00:40:30]  So explain to me what the appeal is then.
[00:40:32]  What's going on?
[00:40:33]  So honestly, it was a meme, but like, and I think most people that listen to it are still listening to that as a meme.
[00:40:39]  But like, if you like, actually, like, she is sauce.
[00:40:41]  Like, she's actually funny.
[00:40:43]  Last thought.
[00:40:44]  No, I said sauce.
[00:40:45]  Like, she's like, she has sauce.
[00:40:47]  Oh, I thought you were like, she's sentient.
[00:40:48]  No, like, she, she's funny.
[00:40:50]  And, like, it's ironic that, like, she landed in this space because I think that she actually could be like a funny solid influencer.
[00:40:56]  No, I just really fucking want her to be.
[00:40:58]  I'm 100% serious.
[00:40:59]  No, I am unironically serious.
[00:41:01]  Because, like, her friends on the show, the show's actually kind of funny because, like, it's all her southern Nashville friends that are with her.
[00:41:07]  And, like, some of them say some absurd shit.
[00:41:08]  They're just leaving the podcast.
[00:41:10]  And it's just kind of awesome.
[00:41:11]  Yeah.
[00:41:13]  And is the topic of the podcast, is it surrounding like her sex life?
[00:41:18]  Spitting?
[00:41:18]  Like, I don't even know how to describe it.
[00:41:19]  It's sexual.
[00:41:21]  A lot of it is her talking about like her like unseen boyfriend, Pookie.
[00:41:25]  Oh, okay.
[00:41:25]  And like, and like their escapades or whatever.
[00:41:28]  And then her friends like telling stories.
[00:41:29]  Like, Nike, the Hawktuid on that guy.
[00:41:33]  He was like, fuck Wayard.
[00:41:34]  And then she's like, yeah.
[00:41:37]  I'm in.
[00:41:38]  I'm buying.
[00:41:38]  It's kind of awesome.
[00:41:39]  Love that.
[00:41:42]  What did you bring this week to talk about?
[00:41:44]  Well, I had the...
[00:41:45]  Because I'm giving you pearls.
[00:41:46]  No, I had that, but I also did want to talk about a couple different things.
[00:41:51]  One, let's roll the tape.
[00:41:53]  Jack Doherty.
[00:41:54]  Oh, talk about it.
[00:41:56]  That was one of my topics.
[00:41:57]  Not a day goes by where people do not celebrate the downfall of kick streamers in general.
[00:42:03]  I feel like at this point, they have perfected the failing upward strategy of just like being the most degenerative freaks of all time in broad daylight.
[00:42:15]  People seem to really enjoy it.
[00:42:18]  Jack Doherty buys a McLaren, which I suspect, how much is it?
[00:42:23]  Like at least 200 grand.
[00:42:25]  No, way more.
[00:42:26]  No, he was crying.
[00:42:27]  He was crying.
[00:42:28]  So some of the clips are wild.
[00:42:29]  And one of the clips, he cries to the cops and he's like, no, I need to record this.
[00:42:32]  I need to make back 200 grand.
[00:42:33]  So he can, he can, he can clearly see him texting clearly.
[00:42:42]  But I don't think he...
[00:42:44]  I think he accelerates right here.
[00:42:46]  And that's where he loses control.
[00:42:49]  He, I think he puts his phone down and then he floors it and then loses control of the vehicle.
[00:42:55]  Yeah, which is like this is a good idea.
[00:42:59]  It doesn't really end there.
[00:43:01]  The drama doesn't end there.
[00:43:02]  No.
[00:43:03]  Because, you know, he's got to keep the camera rolling.
[00:43:06]  Play the sound a little bit.
[00:43:07]  I don't know why you're not playing the sound.
[00:43:11]  Where's your phone?
[00:43:13]  He goes, Where's your phone?
[00:43:14]  Dude, it's wild.
[00:43:16]  It's dystopian.
[00:43:21]  His camera guy is bleeding.
[00:43:24]  Yeah, by the way.
[00:43:25]  Holy fucking shit.
[00:43:27]  This is some context here, too.
[00:43:31]  Are you okay?
[00:43:35]  He's like, oh my god, bro.
[00:43:39]  My whole car.
[00:43:42]  Bro, my whole fucking car, bro.
[00:43:44]  Ah, dude.
[00:43:46]  Can you imagine the timeline where like, the friend is like, completely fine in this, and like he records, like Jack's last moments and like that's his, that's the end of his stream, and then he goes in the talk to a fame?
[00:43:56]  No, it doesn't.
[00:43:57]  There's the.
[00:43:58]  There's the pulling him out of the car moment that was incredible getting put out of the car and he tells the guy saving his life, hold the camera, hold the camera.
[00:44:07]  Like record.
[00:44:08]  It's insane.
[00:44:10]  It's one of the most insane things i've ever seen in my life, I think.
[00:44:14]  So yeah, the depravity in full display.
[00:44:17]  Okay, we have no no, play the audio.
[00:44:20]  Break the body.
[00:44:26]  Help, can you hold this?
[00:44:29]  Oh my god dude, say what you will.
[00:44:36]  Dude, he knows how to frame the shot.
[00:44:40]  Dude, my fucking car.
[00:44:44]  Oh, and that's his first thing.
[00:44:45]  He says, dude, are you where's the engine?
[00:44:50]  Oh, it's in the back.
[00:44:51]  It's a Mclaren.
[00:44:52]  That's why.
[00:44:52]  No, look at this part.
[00:44:55]  Are you good?
[00:44:57]  Oh dude, are you, are you?
[00:45:00]  He goes, are you good?
[00:45:01]  It doesn't even help his friend.
[00:45:02]  He just like goes and starts recording more.
[00:45:04]  Oh my god dude, and he posts this right yeah, he posted it.
[00:45:09]  He clipped the part.
[00:45:10]  He, if you go to his twitter, he clipped the part where he's on his phone and like, looking down while he's driving.
[00:45:17]  He clipped that part out and just showed the car crash in the aftermath to make it seem like it was like oh, how could this have happened?
[00:45:24]  Look, first of all, I think he gunned it right around that truck while on his phone in the, in the pouring rain, in the pouring rain in Texas Florida, do they not?
[00:45:36]  Do they not teach him about like, what was it called hydro planning?
[00:45:39]  Yeah, hydro planning one of those four days?
[00:45:43]  Oh god.
[00:45:45]  So I mean okay, if you're an insurance company right oh, this is awesome.
[00:45:50]  You're not covering this, right?
[00:45:52]  Does it cover?
[00:45:53]  There's no way.
[00:45:54]  Negligence, I don't work at an insurance company.
[00:45:57]  Well, i'm sorry, I need to know how much bro, it's.
[00:46:01]  Definitely he thinks.
[00:46:02]  He thinks it's 200 grand, because there's after this, for like the 10 minutes after this, like the cops are like trying to talk to him and they're like, can you please stop recording?
[00:46:08]  He's like, no, i'm sorry guys, like I gotta make my money back.
[00:46:10]  It's 200 grand, right there.
[00:46:11]  Oh Jesus yeah oh, scroll up.
[00:46:14]  I was replying to something.
[00:46:16]  They go.
[00:46:17]  That Mclaren is not okay.
[00:46:19]  He goes crash my Mclaren.
[00:46:20]  Glad we're both okay.
[00:46:22]  And then I said uh, the Mclaren is not okay because he wasn't even caring about his friend.
[00:46:26]  I didn't think he was talking about his friend.
[00:46:27]  Yeah, I like that.
[00:46:29]  This is the video he posted on his twitter, though this is like he thinks this makes him look good, where he's like, yo, can you hold the camera?
[00:46:34]  Hold the camera.
[00:46:35]  I mean, you look at him like genuinely, like there's this, like no nothing behind his eyes, like he's just like completely, just in the high Yeah, he doesn't care.
[00:46:44]  No, but like even in other clips, like he's just like, there's nothing like, he's just content.
[00:46:48]  There's no such a little content gremlin.
[00:46:52]  Like that, I genuinely don't feel like he doesn't actually genuinely.
[00:46:55]  There's no moment behind the camera where he's like, why do people hate me?
[00:46:58]  Like, there's no, like, he, he, he knows.
[00:47:01]  He knows, right?
[00:47:02]  He knows.
[00:47:02]  He doesn't care.
[00:47:03]  Do you think there's ever a moment where he's like, oh, people hate me.
[00:47:06]  I don't like it.
[00:47:06]  I don't know if he has a perception of this.
[00:47:08]  It's just the numbers.
[00:47:09]  It's just the numbers and the attention.
[00:47:10]  That's the only like thing that like validates him.
[00:47:14]  Yeah, I saw another, I saw another clip about another content creator.
[00:47:17]  His name is Neon.
[00:47:18]  He's also a kick streamer and he does like similar weird shit all the time.
[00:47:22]  And there's this like famous poker guy.
[00:47:24]  You might know who he is.
[00:47:25]  He's like got face tattoos and stuff.
[00:47:28]  Poker guy?
[00:47:28]  Baccarat.
[00:47:29]  I'm not a poker guy.
[00:47:30]  He plays back rap.
[00:47:31]  Does he play back right?
[00:47:32]  You know, he's like a famous gambler.
[00:47:34]  Yeah.
[00:47:34]  He plays back.
[00:47:35]  He's doing like the podcast circuit.
[00:47:37]  He's like a really rich guy.
[00:47:38]  He goes to like Vegas sometimes and he'll win like $2 million in cash and then like fly out or whatever.
[00:47:44]  Anyway, he was talking about Neon.
[00:47:45]  Apparently he'd like let Neon into his house for to make content and he was like a lot of these streamers are very different off camera than they are on camera, which is not the case for any of us, I would say.
[00:47:59]  But apparently it is for the kick streamers, the D-Gen ones.
[00:48:03]  And he said, apparently Neon would literally walk up to people for four hours in his house before they started the live stream and tell them, like, I'm going to do a character and I'm going to be like very mean.
[00:48:15]  And if you don't want that, like, just let me know ahead of time.
[00:48:18]  Like, I apologize.
[00:48:18]  I won't film you or whatever.
[00:48:20]  Which I don't know how much I believe that.
[00:48:22]  But it also blows my mind because it's like, I was thinking about this quite a bit.
[00:48:27]  I'm like, is he trying to do like a Nathan Fielder type thing where he's just trying to be like awkward?
[00:48:32]  Let's not give him too much.
[00:48:33]  Let's not give him anything.
[00:48:34]  No, I know, but that's the problem when you're not good.
[00:48:36]  If anything, what you just told me makes me feel like he's using that as a way to like get people's guard down before he just does his bullshit.
[00:48:42]  Yeah.

=== Elderly Home Awkwardness (03:44) ===

[00:48:44]  But my point is, I think that for a lot of these people, like if I'm going to be like hyper, hyper charitable, ultra charitable, I think they end up becoming the villain regardless after seeing the numbers and becoming the person that they present themselves as inevitably.
[00:49:03]  And the outcome is still the same regardless.
[00:49:04]  Like being a fucking piece of shit on camera to like normal people becomes, you know, a acceptable behavior.
[00:49:12]  But I think maybe in their inception, they're like, I'm not a very funny guy.
[00:49:17]  I want to be funny.
[00:49:19]  How can I be funny by doing the hackiest thing possible, which is just like screaming the N-word?
[00:49:24]  You know what I mean?
[00:49:25]  Like that to them, they think like, oh, this is what's going to get the numbers.
[00:49:30]  Yeah.
[00:49:30]  I mean, all of these guys are so interesting to me because like you guys are a little bit older.
[00:49:34]  And so like you didn't, and you guys had like real jobs prior.
[00:49:36]  Whereas I identify a lot with these guys.
[00:49:39]  Okay.
[00:49:41]  Maybe not you.
[00:49:42]  You're older.
[00:49:43]  But you didn't have a real job.
[00:49:44]  Yeah.
[00:49:44]  I mean, I spun a sound a sign outside Little Seasons for three weeks.
[00:49:47]  25.
[00:49:48]  You're 25.
[00:49:49]  You're a sign spinner for three weeks.
[00:49:50]  That was my only other real job.
[00:49:52]  I had a job.
[00:49:52]  Do you still spin sign?
[00:49:54]  No, I was shit at it.
[00:49:55]  I was terrible.
[00:49:56]  I worked a normal job.
[00:49:57]  Yeah.
[00:49:57]  I was a waiter.
[00:49:58]  That's what I was saying.
[00:49:59]  It's like you've had real jobs.
[00:50:00]  You're a waiter?
[00:50:00]  Yeah, I was a waiter.
[00:50:01]  I used to wait.
[00:50:02]  It was an elderly folks' home.
[00:50:04]  Oh, that's good.
[00:50:05]  Yeah, I was.
[00:50:06]  How long did you work for?
[00:50:07]  I worked for two summers.
[00:50:09]  Did they know what you were?
[00:50:10]  Summers.
[00:50:11]  Yeah, I worked summers.
[00:50:12]  I went to school during the school year and then I worked on a summer.
[00:50:14]  During college?
[00:50:15]  Yeah, during college.
[00:50:16]  I worked as a waiter.
[00:50:18]  Does that make you guys just make you look at me differently?
[00:50:21]  No.
[00:50:22]  We know the product.
[00:50:23]  I remember for some reason, I feel like the most appropriate place for your lifestyle is an old folks' home.
[00:50:29]  Yeah, it was an elderly.
[00:50:30]  And I was very good with the old folks.
[00:50:32]  And I worked.
[00:50:33]  I made $9.20 an hour.
[00:50:35]  You guys like the same shit.
[00:50:36]  Yeah.
[00:50:37]  I was very relatable.
[00:50:38]  No, that's what I'm saying.
[00:50:39]  You're like, oh, this new Frankie Valley?
[00:50:42]  Yeah.
[00:50:42]  Dude, this stuff really pops.
[00:50:43]  Can I tell you something about old folks' homes?
[00:50:45]  Yeah.
[00:50:45]  They were fucking.
[00:50:46]  Yeah.
[00:50:47]  Oh, yeah.
[00:50:47]  They were fucking.
[00:50:49]  Yeah.
[00:50:49]  They were getting married.
[00:50:50]  Like, this one old folk would, it's all one elderly gentleman.
[00:50:55]  Like, he got remarried at like 89.
[00:50:58]  Good for him.
[00:50:59]  Yeah.
[00:50:59]  And he was fucking after they engaged.
[00:51:01]  Did they get married?
[00:51:02]  Like, did they have to get married before they fucked?
[00:51:04]  Like, was that like no?
[00:51:05]  I think they were fucking before because he would come.
[00:51:07]  He'd come down his walker.
[00:51:08]  And his hair was like all fucking all over the place.
[00:51:10]  I don't think they care about that at that point.
[00:51:11]  They're just like, hey, I'm going to die anyway.
[00:51:13]  Fuck it.
[00:51:13]  And they don't ever use any kind of content.
[00:51:16]  Yeah, no, STDs makes it.
[00:51:17]  I don't think some of them might really care because they know they're on the edge and they're like, well, if I do out of wedlock, fucking, like, I might go to hell.
[00:51:23]  Like, they're right there.
[00:51:24]  They're right on the cusp.
[00:51:26]  So it's like, I might as well stick with my values at the end.
[00:51:29]  I think that's very few.
[00:51:30]  Yeah.
[00:51:30]  No, I agree.
[00:51:31]  I think they've given up on that.
[00:51:33]  I think they're just like the villages has a whole culture of swinging.
[00:51:37]  Yeah.
[00:51:38]  And they use a loofah code.
[00:51:39]  I didn't realize that there was a city code at the villages.
[00:51:41]  They use loofah scrubbies to identify what kind of sexual pleasure they are pursuing.
[00:51:48]  They put them on their golf carts.
[00:51:49]  Oh, that's awesome.
[00:51:50]  So it's like pink loofah.
[00:51:52]  I'm looking to get double teamed.
[00:51:53]  Oh.
[00:51:54]  Blue loofah.
[00:51:55]  I'm looking to watch.
[00:51:56]  Oh.
[00:51:57]  One of these situations.
[00:51:58]  You know what I mean?
[00:51:59]  Wait, so if we went to the villages right now, we would see that.
[00:52:02]  I don't, I don't want to think about it.
[00:52:03]  Hold on.
[00:52:04]  Hassan, it is sex is a beautiful thing and it's natural.
[00:52:06]  Oh, yeah.
[00:52:08]  Into elderly ages.
[00:52:09]  Yeah.
[00:52:09]  Okay.
[00:52:10]  We're not asking you to watch pack it up.
[00:52:12]  Okay.
[00:52:12]  Pack it up.
[00:52:13]  Pack it up.
[00:52:14]  No more.
[00:52:14]  You don't think you should.
[00:52:15]  You think at a certain age.
[00:52:16]  Why they get to fucking dictate what we do in our daily lives.
[00:52:19]  I'm dictating what they do.
[00:52:20]  How about that?
[00:52:21]  When is the last time an elderly person dictated you?
[00:52:24]  Every fucking four years when they vote for the most right-wing candidate possible.

=== POV Shots of Loofah Golf Carts (04:46) ===

[00:52:29]  That's what I was asking you.
[00:52:30]  Like, did they know what you are?
[00:52:32]  Wait, the elderly people?
[00:52:34]  Yeah.
[00:52:35]  Oh, no.
[00:52:35]  Why did you say that?
[00:52:36]  Like, you're a fan of the.
[00:52:37]  I'm a fucking werewolf.
[00:52:38]  Yeah, I love that.
[00:52:40]  Did they know that every full moon you turn into a raging homosexual?
[00:52:44]  That's the thing about elderly people is they love the theater.
[00:52:49]  Right.
[00:52:50]  They love gay spaces.
[00:52:51]  They just look the other way, I think, a lot of the time.
[00:52:53]  It's the thing is, like, it's crazy how muddy their views are.
[00:52:56]  Yeah.
[00:52:57]  Like, they would, like, we could all come together and like, all be like in a very uh what's the word?
[00:53:02]  Homogenous uh, perspective.
[00:53:04]  But I think that they're kind of muddied by their politics.
[00:53:07]  Yeah, unfortunately they're just old.
[00:53:09]  Um yeah, I mean I know they never.
[00:53:11]  I don't even think I knew what I was at the time okay um, but yeah, I mean, I remember trying to such a painful experience in my life, trying to have crushes on girls.
[00:53:23]  I really tried right, I had, like I tried, I really forced.
[00:53:28]  The issue didn't work, even though you were boobs.
[00:53:32]  Now yeah, you are a big, you're a big titty boy.
[00:53:35]  I kind of am a titty boy.
[00:53:37]  He was literally while we were, while we were live streaming yesterday.
[00:53:40]  He was watching this like only fans.
[00:53:43]  Mono, who's just trying to farm clicks on twitter uh and, and she and Green Day was gets into cars and like slams them.
[00:53:51]  No no no she's, she's the goat, though.
[00:53:53]  Yeah she, And it's always so wet, so impossibly wet.
[00:53:57]  Why is it raining?
[00:53:59]  I missed context.
[00:54:00]  I was so confused.
[00:54:01]  Yeah.
[00:54:02]  No, she's she's just always, it's pouring.
[00:54:04]  It's always pouring in London, and she's always got them, got the memories out.
[00:54:09]  Yeah, there actually is a new goat.
[00:54:11]  Have you seen the girl who makes a sandwich every day until she finds a boyfriend?
[00:54:17]  I have not seen that.
[00:54:18]  Pull that up.
[00:54:19]  Oh, yeah.
[00:54:20]  Because she has some.
[00:54:22]  So it's shocking because she has some camera angles that I think you would only see in like Breaking Bad.
[00:54:28]  Or she's doing really interesting.
[00:54:30]  The Dutch angle.
[00:54:31]  Well, she's doing really interesting FPS work or FPV first person.
[00:54:36]  Is this on Twitter?
[00:54:37]  Yeah.
[00:54:38]  POV work.
[00:54:39]  Yeah, POV.
[00:54:40]  Yeah.
[00:54:40]  Okay.
[00:54:41]  I'm excited to see you.
[00:54:42]  Oh, okay.
[00:54:43]  Go ahead, click the first one.
[00:54:44]  See, this to me, it's so motherly.
[00:54:48]  Yeah, okay.
[00:54:48]  No, I love that.
[00:54:50]  Just go ahead.
[00:54:50]  Oh, just take a look.
[00:54:53]  You might notice some camera angles there that.
[00:55:01]  See, now pause, pause, pause.
[00:55:03]  That's where she loses me.
[00:55:04]  Oh, you watch the lather, the hand lather?
[00:55:07]  No, that is fucking good.
[00:55:08]  Does she stir in every video that she does?
[00:55:10]  Yes, and the stirring is always very vigorous.
[00:55:14]  Like she's trying to beat air into mayonnaise.
[00:55:17]  Let's see.
[00:55:19]  Yeah, that's.
[00:55:22]  Oh, was that even necessary to stir?
[00:55:25]  What was she stirring like that?
[00:55:27]  She knows what she's doing.
[00:55:29]  Don't cry, my lady.
[00:55:32]  Okay, this, I think, in the recent one, she started holding the camera in her mouth to get the POV like that.
[00:55:38]  To get the POV, yeah.
[00:55:40]  That's awesome.
[00:55:41]  I respect the fucking.
[00:55:42]  I will admit this.
[00:55:44]  The sandwiches look banging.
[00:55:46]  Yeah, the sandwiches absolutely like fire.
[00:55:48]  Yeah.
[00:55:48]  Would you eat her sandwich?
[00:55:51]  I would love to eat that sandwich.
[00:55:52]  That's babe.
[00:55:55]  Ah, that's a big old one, too.
[00:55:57]  That's a good sandwich.
[00:55:59]  God.
[00:56:00]  Go pull up another one because I think you just have to see this POV shot.
[00:56:05]  Because it really is redefining.
[00:56:07]  Go on X. Or wait, I think the third one is the one I'm.
[00:56:12]  Are those natural?
[00:56:12]  No, that's the one we just watched.
[00:56:14]  The sandwiches?
[00:56:14]  Absolutely.
[00:56:15]  Yeah.
[00:56:16]  That's pure FDA prime beef right there.
[00:56:19]  Oh, that's it.
[00:56:19]  There you go.
[00:56:21]  Go ahead, click that.
[00:56:23]  Oh, my God.
[00:56:24]  Look at this POV.
[00:56:26]  Go back and pick that.
[00:56:27]  No, no, wait, hold on.
[00:56:29]  That camera angle would make Alfred Hitchcock blush.
[00:56:34]  Wait, wait, that one.
[00:56:35]  When she's wait, wait, go back to when she's putting the olive oil on the pant.
[00:56:39]  Kitty Cinderella.
[00:56:40]  What is happening?
[00:56:40]  Kitty Cinderella's never.
[00:56:42]  Oh, my God.
[00:56:43]  Wait, she's defying gravity sometimes.
[00:56:47]  Can you go back to when she's using the mandolin slicer?
[00:56:50]  Go a little bit further.
[00:56:51]  I think she's even looking for a boyfriend at this point.
[00:56:54]  I think she has a boyfriend.
[00:56:55]  Okay.
[00:56:56]  Who do you think is filming?
[00:56:57]  That.
[00:56:57]  Pause.
[00:56:57]  Go back.
[00:56:58]  This makes my blood cold in a way that I cannot describe to you.
[00:57:03]  That is a mandolin slicer.
[00:57:05]  I cut my thumb off as a child using a mandolin slicer.
[00:57:08]  And I don't know if you guys know this, but recently there was a TikTok influencer who made a cucumber salad video.
[00:57:15]  Yeah.

=== Presidential Coffee Tailoring (05:31) ===

[00:57:16]  Thermo fucking nuclear.
[00:57:18]  And everybody and their mother wanted to make cucumber salad.
[00:57:21]  And he used a mandolin slicer.
[00:57:22]  Yeah.
[00:57:23]  And apparently, emergency room visits went through the fucking ceiling because everybody was doing what she is doing and using a mandolin without a guard and cutting their fingers off.
[00:57:34]  And there are videos of people doing this on the internet.
[00:57:36]  Oh my God.
[00:57:37]  And I'm telling you right now, I could watch an ISIS beheading video easier than I can watch a mandolin slicing accident video.
[00:57:47]  There is something about that injury that makes my butthole proper trauma.
[00:57:53]  Yeah.
[00:57:53]  Yeah, yeah, you did.
[00:57:54]  You had trauma.
[00:57:55]  Look, is she on Twitter?
[00:57:58]  Why are you gonna ask her to come?
[00:58:00]  No, like, there's no, there's no sexual attraction.
[00:58:04]  It's just like, it's like, it's just weird.
[00:58:06]  Like, I don't know how to describe it.
[00:58:07]  I've tried to describe it over and over again.
[00:58:09]  I've talked about this over and over again.
[00:58:10]  It's just like a, it's just like at some point, in some part of the womb, I was like built as a straight man, but then I just like none of these sexual while you were on the way out.
[00:58:18]  You just got gay on the last moment.
[00:58:20]  No, it's just like, so like all the things are like, oh, I see that.
[00:58:23]  Yeah.
[00:58:24]  And my body wants to react, but I can't get there.
[00:58:28]  Look.
[00:58:29]  Yeah.
[00:58:29]  Honestly, her sandwiches are pretty goaded.
[00:58:31]  Like, it's not.
[00:58:32]  Look, I'm not even like gassing her up because of the other stuff that she's prominently displaying.
[00:58:38]  Scrolling Twitter in public these days is a dangerous fucking game.
[00:58:41]  Oh, my feed is presidential polls and gay porn.
[00:58:47]  Wow.
[00:58:49]  Wow.
[00:58:50]  Presidential, presidential polls, Harris in the lead, Georgia, whatever.
[00:58:54]  You know, it's like gay men fucking.
[00:58:56]  It's tailored to your, yeah.
[00:58:58]  It's tailored to what you're I try to scroll past it.
[00:59:01]  Do you know what my Twitter is?
[00:59:02]  What?
[00:59:03]  All jet shit.
[00:59:04]  Well, I get a little Viking stuff in this.
[00:59:06]  It's just all jet shit.
[00:59:06]  Mine is like all Elon and like right-wing people now.
[00:59:09]  Yeah, mine is mine is predominantly right-wing content.
[00:59:13]  Yeah.
[00:59:14]  Like, it's entertaining.
[00:59:16]  And I think it's the right-wing content is like the baseline, I think, on Twitter.
[00:59:21]  It's like, oh, if you don't spend enough time on it, as I don't any longer because I only use it when I'm streaming, it's usually just like, you're gonna see right-wing content.
[00:59:33]  Like, that's Marsh.
[00:59:35]  Marsh, what are you doing, Marsh?
[00:59:36]  You gotta say, Marshall is just blousing.
[00:59:41]  That's insane.
[00:59:41]  Or should I say blousing?
[00:59:43]  That's crazy.
[00:59:44]  He's just like clicking on rental.
[00:59:46]  I have ADHD.
[00:59:47]  Can you help me, sir?
[00:59:50]  That was incredible.
[00:59:51]  That was incredible.
[00:59:53]  Connor, we have limited time.
[00:59:55]  Is there anything you wanted to talk about?
[00:59:57]  Oh, man.
[00:59:58]  No, I mean, I appreciate you bringing stuff up.
[01:00:00]  I appreciate it.
[01:00:01]  I just, you know, I just like talking to my friends, having a good time.
[01:00:03]  I like talking.
[01:00:04]  I've enjoyed this podcast.
[01:00:05]  Do you like breasts?
[01:00:06]  Yeah.
[01:00:06]  No, big time.
[01:00:07]  Big fan.
[01:00:08]  You like breasts.
[01:00:10]  Do you?
[01:00:10]  What are they?
[01:00:11]  Thank you for phrasing that so some people aren't boob men.
[01:00:14]  Right.
[01:00:14]  Like some prefer butts.
[01:00:15]  I mean, I just think women are beautiful.
[01:00:17]  That's what I used to say before I was gay.
[01:00:20]  Before I was gay, that's what I used to say.
[01:00:22]  That breasts are.
[01:00:24]  That may be my coffee.
[01:00:25]  Most likely.
[01:00:26]  Just let them in.
[01:00:27]  God, what are they?
[01:00:28]  Wait, I have to give them a fucking.
[01:00:30]  It's my coffee.
[01:00:31]  You have a coffee in front of you.
[01:00:33]  Yeah, but I needed a vanilla latte.
[01:00:35]  I'm sorry.
[01:00:35]  We need to end the episode with this.
[01:00:37]  You have a coffee right in front of you.
[01:00:39]  I know.
[01:00:40]  I do.
[01:00:41]  But look, this is like crack.
[01:00:43]  This is black, straight black coffee.
[01:00:46]  Dude, I sipped this much and I felt it like straight.
[01:00:49]  He's shaking.
[01:00:51]  Straight.
[01:00:52]  That's not fair.
[01:00:52]  I actually have a tremor in my hands.
[01:00:54]  I passively shake.
[01:00:55]  Nice, nice.
[01:00:58]  On that note.
[01:00:59]  Are you fucking see you on the paywall?
[01:01:01]  Where Austin is going to be even more ableists?
[01:01:03]  This is Connor.
[01:01:04]  I'm so sorry.
[01:01:05]  Patreon.com slash fear.
[01:01:07]  Ladies and gentlemen.
[01:01:08]  Sorry.
[01:01:08]  And we'll see.
[01:01:09]  And I just realized he's wearing my shirt.
[01:01:11]  On the other side.
[01:01:12]  People keep asking me, name 10 Iron Maiden songs.
[01:01:16]  It'll stop.
[01:01:17]  It's just stopped.
[01:01:19]  Okay.
[01:01:19]  Oh, you ordered for the same place.
[01:01:22]  That's awesome.
[01:01:22]  You didn't ask me what I wanted for coffee.
[01:01:25]  How dare you?
[01:01:26]  This is what gave me my favorite.
[01:01:28]  Yeah, you were so awesome.
[01:01:28]  Oh, my listener.
[01:01:30]  Connor, Connor, where can people find you?
[01:01:32]  Twitch, Twitter, YouTube, everywhere.
[01:01:34]  Connor eats pants, C-O-N, and O-R eats pants, one word.
[01:01:37]  And ladies and gentlemen, if you have not watched Connor's content or Fortnite Friday, I mean, honestly, Fortnite Friday is like my only big production.
[01:01:45]  Like everything else, I just chill and play video games.
[01:01:47]  Oh, yeah.
[01:01:47]  I have no face camera.
[01:01:49]  Highly suggest go checking it out because it has been some of the funniest content I've seen on the internet.
[01:01:55]  Thank you.
[01:01:55]  Thank you so much.
[01:01:56]  I appreciate that baby, brother.
[01:01:57]  Thank you.
[01:01:57]  Thank you, Connor.
[01:01:57]  Thank you guys for having me.
[01:01:58]  I love you guys.
[01:01:59]  We love you too, Connor.
[01:02:00]  And I'm sorry for fucking so in the middle.
[01:02:03]  We'll see you on the paywall, patreon.com/slash for your aunt.
[01:02:07]  I'm not, he's changing the subject because now he's actually afraid.
[01:02:10]  He got, I don't know where you got 20 G's, Jesus Christ.
[01:02:16]  Will.
[01:02:17]  Yeah, I'm down.
[01:02:18]  Oh my God.
[01:02:21]  You said you would smoke them in any assistant.
[01:02:23]  Yeah, I would, but for $20,000, that's a free $20,000 for you.
[01:02:27]  $20,000?
[01:02:27]  That's a lot of money.
[01:02:28]  That's a free $20,000?
[01:02:29]  That's a lot of money, which is a good idea.
[01:02:31]  How much are you willing to put up?
[01:02:32]  God, I don't know.
[01:02:32]  I don't want to fucking put any money up.
[01:02:35]  I'm fine with whatever.
[01:02:36]  Bitch made.
[01:02:37]  Yeah, I'm fine with whatever amount you put up.
[01:02:39]  Y'all are going to call me a pussy anyway, so I'm just going to.
[01:02:41]  No, I was trying to get you some of Hassan's money here.
[01:02:44]  Hold on.
[01:02:45]  All right, Hassan, how about that?
[01:02:46]  Let's do something for