Tim catches up with comedian Yannis Pappas about the Obama’s, the writer’s strike, grand theft flash mobs and Tim’s favorite catholic TV station growing up.American Royalty Tour🎟 https://www.timdilloncomedy.com/Pre-Order ‘Death By Boomers’ By Tim Dillon👉 https://rb.gy/gafn4SPONSORS:Morgan & Morgan:For more information go to forthepeople.com/tim▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬Subscribe to the channel:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4wo...Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/timjdillon/Twitter:https://www.twitter.com/TimJDillonListen on Spotify!https://open.spotify.com/show/2gRd1wo...#TheTimDillonShowMerch: https://store.timdilloncomedy.com/For every $400,000 we gross in revenue, we are donating five dollars to end homelessness in Los Angeles. We are challenging other creators to do the same.#TimGivesBack
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Hollywood Insider Giannis Pop00:05:13
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dylan show.
Hollywood insider, someone here that can help us make sense of this time.
Help us make sense of it.
Giannis Pop is the host of what is the name now?
Giannis Pap is our Giannis Pop is our.
Help us make sense of this time because here's the reality: my mother's last wish, she's dead.
When she was dying, she said before she died, just pay the writers.
That was her final, that was the last thing she said.
She goes, she goes, just pay the right.
She goes, just pay him.
Yeah.
She jumped ship when they turned on Trump, right?
On Fox.
She didn't want to live in a world where Tucker Carlson was not on television.
Right.
Here's what I will say about my mother.
She got at it a decent time.
She had a great run of America.
It was a good run.
She did.
Like that generation.
Ironically for her, the Obama years were great for this area, for the country.
And then, yeah, Trump inherited a very booming economy.
You know?
Yeah.
She lived through a time where she made a lot of excuses for Trump and Cheney.
A lot of people were talking about.
What did Obama do for the economy that made it so good?
He was no drama Obama.
All we can get on him is that his wife has a lot of people.
Do you believe he's seen it?
Do you believe his wife?
Do you believe he's, as we all big dick Mike?
He's no, but let's be honest with you.
If I told you Obama was gay, let's be very honest.
Yes.
Would you be a shocked man?
Would I be shocked if I was a bisexual?
You would be shocked.
He smokes Newports and he plays basketball.
I'd be shocked.
Why would he, why would it shock you that he's gay?
Do you do you look at that?
I'm shocked he's got a white mom.
Do you look at that relationship and think that that is genuine?
Absolutely.
Really?
Yeah.
What is that based on?
Black love.
It's based on RB.
I mean, it's just so crazy.
It's just so crazy.
I don't have a data like you've got.
But everyone I talk to that says, and listen, by the way, I'm pro that.
I'm pro him being gay.
And I'm pro big Mike.
I'm the progressive.
I'm actually the progressive.
Everyone else.
The Republicans are trying to dunk on him because they hate gay people.
I'm a gay person who likes gay people and thinks it would be pretty fucking cool if we had a gay president and a trans first lady.
Here's the only thing I don't understand.
If Michelle Obama is big dick Mike, as it's if she is Mike, don't make it vulgar.
Well, no, is this off YouTube already?
Is this off you?
It's probably off already, right?
This is what she's called in the hashtags on Twitter or X, N W O Yeah.
Since Elon Went, Hollywood Hogan.
Yeah.
If Michelle is Michael and those dick bounce videos are true, you never watched the dick bounce videos.
Oh, I have.
And by the way, can we ask what's going on?
Well, this is what I'm skeptical of.
Why is she freeballing as a transgender woman?
Good point.
Good point.
Don't they at least wear Tyler John's credit where credit is due?
Why is she not wearing boxer briefs?
Why is she wearing 1997 boxers?
Some days you think you can get away with it.
But she knows she's going on Ellen.
She's going to have to dance.
Why would she pick that day to wear old school boxers?
If the bounce videos are real, she's packing.
She's got a nice cut of meat.
She ain't Irish.
If the bounce videos are real, she's not an Irish Catholic.
She's packing.
Listen, all I'm saying is this.
I don't have a problem.
Like Abraham Lincoln is rumored that he had a very close relationship with his friend.
Yeah.
I was about to say, not his wife.
Yeah.
So like, does that make him not a good president?
I don't think so.
It makes him, it makes him bi.
So maybe Obama was bi.
Maybe he's not.
Maybe he's a straight guy.
He did say, and I'm sure you've said this as a heterosexual man.
He did say in a letter, I make love to men in my imagination.
You know that.
That is a letter that Barack Obama wrote to an ex.
I make love to men every night, but in my imagination.
I've never thought it.
As a heterosexual man, have you said that ever?
No, I've never thought it unless the guy has taken a lot of hormones and looks exactly like a girl.
Because by the way, which is not, that doesn't even count.
I'm fooled.
But here's what I'm saying is that I'm not basing this on nothing.
The quote is, I make love to men daily, but in my mind.
I don't know what that means.
That might mean I make love to men daily, but in the imagination.
That might be something he's just saying to seem cool to get pussy.
Right.
Is that how men get pussy?
Writers Strike Entertainment Debate00:14:58
Who knows?
Did he want to be an actor before he became a politician?
It's very possible.
I know.
I can swim.
It's a good show.
If I turn up in the East River, we know what happened, Mike.
But I'm just saying we have to get more evolved about how we look at people.
Are you suggesting that his hot chef drowned in the two-foot pool because an affair between Obama and him was about to come out as you put your KuhlmoD sunglasses on?
I don't know.
I'm just saying, if I was fucking a hot chef, and by the way, it would be lovely.
If I had a hard-bodied chef who paddleboarded every day in my pond, and then one day that chef came to me and said, you got to be who you are.
I'm telling everybody about our love.
That person would be done.
So whose fault is it?
If that story is true, whose fault is it?
The chefs.
It's the chef's fault.
Keep your mouth shut.
I mean, you know, it's like they say in Scientology, this is for sucking, not for talking.
Is that what they say?
That's what they say.
Is that really what they say?
That's what they say.
Wait a minute.
Yeah, David, what's his name?
David?
Miskovich.
David Miskowitz said to Tom Cruise, remember, this is for sucking, not for talking.
We have your audit.
We know what you think about men.
We know what you like to do.
This is for sucking, not for talking.
Right.
Okay.
Yeah.
Is it a bad deal what Scientology did for those people, by the way?
It's not at all.
Not a bad deal at all.
Right.
It's a nice deal.
I think Leah Remini's a rat.
She is.
And actually, she's a rat.
And I've said it before.
All of them get famous.
They all participate in that thing, the Sea Org.
They torture the other people.
They have to work 20 hours a day, whatever it is.
And then they decide once they're famous and rich, they're not into it anymore.
Because you know why?
Because Scientology goes, we want your kids to be in it now.
And then they go, no.
Yeah, that's when they get a, that's when they grow a conscious.
After it's over, they've done, they've gotten everything out of it that they can.
That's when they decide to grow conscious.
It's like asking a murderer to give an apology at court after he's convicted.
I mean, and he goes, I'm sorry.
It's like, you should have been sorry before you did it.
To me, I'm like they went.
That's what you wanted to do.
They went to Tom Cruise and goes, listen, we know what you like.
And the reality is we can protect you.
We can protect you for decades.
You can be the biggest star in the world.
We just will create an alternative reality of who you are and sell it to this country of people.
And Tom Cruise said, great, let's do it.
And maybe John Travolta did.
I don't know.
I don't know.
It's not my business.
And they were repackaging an old blackmail apparatus, the old confession, right?
You do the audit.
So the Catholic priest goes, come to confess.
And then they go, okay, we know all your dirty secrets now.
So you're going to have to turn the other way while I go on this date with this seven-year-old.
Right.
Don't say anything.
And then the audit, similarly, you do the audit, you tell all your dirty secrets, and Scientology goes, now we got a vault of all the guys that you slob.
And so now, remember, this is for sucking, not talking.
I told the priest when I was 12 years old, when I was 13, I said, I'm having these thoughts and feelings I don't understand.
And he was like, why don't you keep them yourself, you fat fuck?
That is.
Yeah, that was a straight priest.
That's a rare, quite a rare one.
Straight priest.
Yeah, that's like an albino tiger.
It's rare, yeah.
Well, here's what I will say about this writer's strike, which we are, America is in Christ.
We're not getting out.
It's like it's going to be a long time.
It's like David Zazlov, Big Daddy Zaz.
Yeah.
Ted Sarandos, Teddy.
Greek.
Donna Langley, I believe NBC Universal.
These are all my best friends.
She's so strange for me.
I think I actually heard through the Greek grapevine that Ted Sarandos loved your interview with, what's his name again?
I think his name is from Austin.
He's a little famous.
Rogan?
No.
He liked that one, but he liked more the one with Alex Jones.
Alex Jones.
Yeah, probably.
Yeah.
Ted Sarandos was going, let's put that on Netflix.
I think, but by the way, he definitely does.
He's into the guy like he's into it.
Yeah, because here's what people don't realize about life.
It's really boring.
Yes.
It's actually incredibly boring, especially if you're rich.
It's really boring.
That's where drugs or something like that.
Ted Sarandos is so bored.
He's so bored.
What's he going to do?
Buy another house, stare at a few more dolphins?
Marry another black woman.
So when someone goes, hey, maybe Michelle's got a hog or something, he's tuning in.
Probably.
It's not more entertaining than that.
It does not get more entertaining.
It's fun.
It's just fun.
They had a meeting with the Writers Guild.
Everybody was hopeful about this.
I spoke to people that, you know, that represent me.
They go, yeah, this is coming to an end.
This was about a week ago.
The AMPTP, whatever it's called, that's what it's called.
They sit down with the WGA negotiating team.
Then the WGA negotiating team is hardcore, like old Brooklyn Marxists.
I respect them.
It's like Adam Conover, guys like that.
They don't give a fuck.
They don't want to hear nothing, right?
They want, they want, it's like grapes of wrath time with them.
Respect to them, right?
They're doing their thing.
Everybody's playing their role.
So you got them.
And then you got Big Daddy Zaz and the crew.
And Big Daddy Zaz, David Zazlov, is very offended at how mean everybody has been to him because he decided to pay himself a quarter billion dollars because he thought he was worth it.
Now, by the way, if you don't realize your own worth, who will?
No one will.
I mean, if someone is deciding their own salary, what are they going to do?
Short sell themselves?
It's crazy.
It's genuinely crazy to expect David Zazlov, Big Daddy Zaz, which says a brilliant merger.
Yeah.
Warner Brothers and discovery because people, they go, why doesn't Warner Brothers have more investigation, discovery?
And so he goes, for thinking of that brilliant idea, he paid himself a quarter billy.
He's very offended at how nasty people have been to him.
He's very offended at how directly they're going after him.
He goes to a college to speak.
They're booing him.
They're chanting pay the writers.
All of these billionaires are upset at how personally this has been, this has gotten personal.
It's gotten ugly.
So the AMPTP meets with the WJ and goes, you have to take our offer.
You have to take this offer.
And it just falls flat.
The WGA is like, get the fuck out of here.
The WGA now is refusing to meet.
There's no new, there's no new meetings on the books.
How do we solve it, Giannis Papas?
How do we do it?
How do we change it?
I don't know.
This is kind of like the Russia Ukraine.
It kind of feels like our military operation in Afghanistan.
It's going to go on for a good decade or two.
Yeah.
Whoa.
Yeah, I just don't think it's going to end.
That's crazy.
Yeah, I just think that it's, I don't see a solution.
It will never end.
No.
The only place I can see harmony between the Marxist union, working class, and the elite of Hollywood is in Julia Roberts' home.
She married a camera guy.
Yeah.
This is an uncomfortable time for their relationship.
That's very true.
She did marry a camera guy.
She married a camera guy.
Women are idiots.
Here's the thing.
He's a union camera guy.
No, and I'm sure he's got a dick.
And, you know, he's pounded around.
That's a love we can believe in.
They're still together.
I believe in that love.
And here's what I would say.
And you also believe in Obama and his chef's love.
What I'm saying, you're a believer of that.
I know that you're putting it out there that that's an unreasonable thing to believe.
Not at all.
I'm saying, is it any more unreasonable than any of the other things we're asked to believe about people?
No, I did not say we're not.
We were asked to believe that Bill and Hillary Clinton were in like love.
Remember that?
We were asked to believe that like Bill Clinton and Hillary were in love with each other.
That is love in Washington.
That is love in Washington.
I don't know about that.
Every town has a different type of love.
Okay, that's maybe, that's a good point.
That's a good, Long Island has a love where we're going to.
It's just eating.
We're in the cul-de-sac.
We're going to eat.
Vast majority of it is eating and racist.
Yes.
Yes.
And racist.
Long Island, you want to find someone you can be racist with while you eat.
That's what it is.
What's your definition of love in Georgetown?
Is it romance?
Is it?
It's Claire and Frank Underwood.
Who do we have to kill?
Right.
Yeah.
So to me, I don't know what's going on with the Obamas, but I just think all possibilities are open all the time.
Taylor Swift's on tour.
Don't be such a downer.
I'm not.
I'm actually, I think it's fun and nice if he had a love with a chef.
I think it'd be great.
I think it'd be great.
We'll never know because guess what?
And by the way, those are, sometimes it is nice when you have a love and then that love is gone.
Yeah.
And sometimes, look, when you're the most powerful man in the world and maybe you are straight and you're married, maybe you just want to have an affair with a hot guy just because like, maybe you're bored.
I'm bored.
You're bored.
And you know what?
You expect that that chef who's getting paid a nice salary will know to keep his mouth closed or else he's going to drown in two feet of water.
All these writers, all these writers that are saying to themselves, I want residuals.
I want more money.
I want.
Start a fucking podcast and shut up, you baby.
There you go.
There it is.
There's the answer.
Does anyone have a Putting Furniture Together Yet podcast?
Start it.
There might be the answer.
There's only 10,000 of these.
You can be the 10,000th and one.
We need 10,000 more.
Is there a podcast breaking down Tim Dylan episode?
But isn't there?
Probably is.
But isn't this class warfare?
Yes.
It's class warfare and it's ugly.
Yes, it is.
It's ugly.
It's between the poor and the rich.
Well, it's between the rich and the rich.
No, it's between the poor and the rich.
They're not podcasters.
The writers have money.
They're not three of them.
No, some of them have money.
A few of them.
A few of them have money.
And a lot of them have never made anyone laugh.
So isn't that money that's like free money?
If you're making money in comedy and you've never made not a one person laugh, isn't that free money?
It's free money.
It's casino money.
During the last four years, the casino opened and everybody was able to walk in and you got chips based on how diverse or interesting or whatever you were.
And they wanted to tell marginalized stories and all that.
So you're playing with house money.
Yeah.
I mean, you're talking to the wrong person if you're looking for sympathy from the writers and the talent executives.
They said no to me for everything.
So I've had to do everything myself.
So I just say, I just say learn to code.
Yeah.
I just say learn to code.
It's a cold, it's a cold, harsh reality that hopefully they're hearing.
Networks don't want to do pilots that don't make it to air anymore.
Yeah.
Because Tim Dylan's show's getting a million viewers and we have no script.
I believe I'm for both.
I'm for both.
I'm for the writers and the billionaires because I have integrity.
I want everyone to win.
Right.
I want everyone to win.
I want a billionaire to wake up and be a billionaire.
Are you rooting a little bit for one side?
Well, here's what I've said.
I've said I'm in the middle.
I will poison Adam Conover.
If David Zaslov gives me a vial of something to throw at him, I will do that.
But just because I like challenges, I love spy novels.
But I, no, I, I, I, in this war, I think the only ground that I can take is the middle ground.
Right.
You know?
Whereas, which is where you live.
Look, I, I, I like the CEOs better.
I aspire to be like them.
I think they're good people.
I think the writers have certain points.
You just got to.
Like the CEOs now, the AMPTP has suggested that the writers start drowning their children.
Now, I say to that, I understand it, and I understand why they're doing it.
I don't agree with it.
But they're saying now, a writer, if you're a writer and you cannot afford your child, you should drown it in the pool you can't afford.
It's green.
That's very green as well.
It's environmentally sound.
Environmentally sound.
Look, just pay these paupers before they dive into your foyer.
They attack your lawns.
Yeah.
Just pay these paupers something.
I was for the writers.
I was really, I wanted to get out there with Mark Ruffalo and I wanted to protest.
I wanted a homeless sign.
Mark Ruffalo.
I wanted to get out there.
But when that side got nasty to the CEOs and started getting personal, very mean and started talking about their salary don't like it, that's personal, but he's, that's out of bounds.
Here's the reality.
Here's the reality.
Actors make a lot of money and then no one talks about that.
Nobody's talking about actors getting 20 million a movie.
Mark Rufflo's not giving it back.
Nobody's talking about that.
Everybody is only talking about ceo compensation right, Mark Rufflo.
And if Netflix, if i'm the only person who will do all of the shows on Netflix yeah, if no one else will work.
If I have to scab and be in every show, if i'm that bitch from wednesday that doesn't blink, if i'm on Outer Banks, if i'm everything, if i'm every fucking true crime documentary, if I have to do every show in this country HBO I, you know they bring back a girl's reboot and i'm Lena Dunham, which would be I mean, seamless.
But if, if I have to do that, if I have to scab and do every show, I might have to do it yeah, just put Jimmy just to make America happy, yeah.
And just put the tonight show on.
I don't think they have writers.
The tonight show.
Do they have a host?
The tonight show hasn't been on.
That's a great point.
I don't I. By the way, no one is affected by any of that.
You know what's so funny, go and ask anybody like hey, just ask a guy work in a construction guy, be like, how are you doing without Colbert?
Tonight Show Host Absence00:04:46
They're gonna go.
What they don't even know it's happening.
They have no idea this is happening.
That's part of the reason why I think the UH, the elite, the ceos and the UH networks are going like you guys gotta meet us halfway because these shows aren't making the money that they used to make.
They don't make any money.
Nobody really cares.
The illusion's kind of over.
People just want to watch Even White Guys specials again on Netflix.
I mean, they don't know what to do there.
There is three that I can think of right now.
I know, and Taylor Swift, I think a little bit of that is sort of a backlash too, where people are just going like i'm tired.
I'm tired of names I can't pronounce.
I don't even like Taylor Swift.
It's just nice to see a blonde girl up there.
Guys, you know what it is?
Welcome back.
It should be called the welcome home tour, not the Eras tour.
It should be called This Era's White.
Yeah, this is just a white era and it's their fault.
It's their fault they got two nuts with the Gaboogalies, Labooga Rougajes, so we're about three Bungi Gabangabingo.
Yeah, I mean, I don't know what city she's on like, but I think in the last leg of the tour you might see a little of these at her concert.
I've all and and, by the way, now i'll go and it'll be 12 year old kids.
12 year old kids, because if you go too far, one way the the, the backlash is is, Taylor Swift.
For every action there is an equal but opposite white supremacist.
Do the crazy names anymore?
I agree with you.
People just got tired of Zimbabwe and Uhutu and Kalina.
It can't happen, Taylor.
How about Taylor?
They just they watch one too many specials of a guy sitting down doing stand-up and they said, i've had enough.
People want to.
They want to remember what white people in small towns having high school type problems right yeah, boys and girls at the soda fountain right, this is what they want.
It's time to go back to that.
Everything can't be about your trans abortion.
Every show can't be about a pregnant man.
We're back to 1950s, Pennsylvania.
Ready, it's the glory time factories.
Dad and mom are working at the factory.
Yeah, dad's got a lunch pail and the factory is Apple Piece.
Yeah, there are no factories, but it's a.
It's a theme restaurant.
That's right that everyone can get behind.
Yeah, it's back to that.
Yeah, what do you think about Progozian, who's dead?
Yvgeny Pregozian, who is has, I believe, been blown up?
Yeah, it was an accident.
Now, everybody that, can you just imagine the pilots when they got in there, they went, They go, you got booked on this gig too.
Well, I was talking about that people.
I thought they were going to land for one second.
Flight attendant, flight attendant going like, hey, man, this is not cool.
When they see him walk in as the guest on the plane, they go, oh, we're not landing.
No, it was so, and they took out a wing, which you always know is bad.
They took out a wing.
Yeah.
And that's, it's over immediately.
And then the plane just becomes a missile, goes and crashes.
Look, if you cross Putin, you fall from the sky.
Here's the deal.
People fall out of windows all the time around it.
How do you feel now?
I know that you've, you know, you were a staunch supporter of pro-Israel.
What's the question?
You're a staunch supporter of the Ukraine.
Absolutely.
And I appreciate that.
I tattooed the Ukrainian flag on both my doors.
And so to me, how are you feeling now?
Are you feeling like there's ever, should we ever negotiate with Russia?
Is there ever any reason to try to end the war?
No, we should only negotiate underground from nuclear bunkers.
Yes.
We have to go all the way with this.
All the way.
All the way.
Let's let them fly.
Let's let them fall.
It makes sense.
Yeah.
It's a win.
It's a win-win situation.
It's a win-win situation.
So I will only...
How many?
Can I ask you a question?
Have you were you and your wife going to go to the Ukraine before this happened?
Absolutely.
Yes.
Yeah.
I mean, I had a tough time returning the tickets on Expedia.
Yes.
What is your favorite food they serve there?
Some type of dumpling with sour cream.
You know what the funny thing?
Fun bed of sour cream?
Yeah, do you know the funny thing about that food?
Is it kind of nondescript?
It's just like trash European.
Yeah, it's just a Poland, Slovak, Russian, and they're like, here's Kraut.
And here's a dumpling.
And here's this sausage and here's some kraut and go fight the Nazis.
Overcome them.
And then they all claim it.
They're like, this is Polish food.
But then you go into a Latvian, this is Latvia.
It's a great place, I believe.
I forget it was.
Fuck, I don't know.
It's in Greenpoint.
Maybe it's called Lomenskaya.
Great Polish restaurant in Greenpoint.
There's a lot of great Polish restaurants in Greenpoint.
Great for Polish food.
Right, right.
Well, for sure.
It's like saying this place has a great hot dog.
Yeah, no.
It's basically ballpark food they serve you.
City Rot and Citizen Arrests00:12:43
Yeah.
I went to a four-star German restaurant in Germany and they put a ballpark frank on my plate with applesauce and like mustard.
Yeah.
I was like, this is your, this is your.
But that's what they do.
Yeah, they're, they're, they're not civilized.
I'm, I want to go on a trip.
Uh, I haven't been on a real like vacation vacation in a long time.
It's too hard.
You really do.
I'm telling you right now.
What's the show?
An hour?
It's an hour.
And you do two of these a week?
Two of these a week.
It's a lot.
Can we look at the clip and say, dear actors and writers?
Yeah.
That's cool and writers.
Dear actors and writers.
You see how hard we work.
This is cold work.
But this is hard work, by the way.
It's very hard.
And here's the reality.
I do acting as well sometimes.
And it's a lot of sitting around.
Yeah.
It's a lot of sitting in the trailer.
No, yeah.
We kept funny going while I support the actors.
Yeah, me too.
And David Zaslov.
And the fact that you can't support them both is crazy.
No, you could like, yeah, I mean, you support Ukraine and I want I you want peace.
I support my union, but I will scab from Big Daddy's ass.
Yeah, that's why you're voting for Vivek Ramaswamy.
He wants peace.
I want another podcast.
You're a non-war podcaster.
Should I run?
I'm literally thinking about running for the governor of California.
You should try.
I may try.
You should try.
And here's why.
Yeah.
I don't want the job.
Right.
And I think those, that's an asset.
It is definitely an asset.
Because here's the deal.
Yeah.
I think I could, because California is out of, go to the flash mobs, please.
There's so many robberies in California right now.
Gangs of people run into these stores and just flash mob.
Well, you call it robber mob.
I would stop it.
You call it robbery.
I call it how society has failed these people.
Yeah, I guess let's put on our headphones to listen to the flash mob.
Well.
News right now, Albert Kenobi.
We don't need that.
Mask thieves have smashed display cases and stolen merchandise from Nordstrom.
That's in the Westfield Topanga Mall.
Let's go right to Jen McCromb.
People are starving.
I just can imagine the moment.
It's not intact.
Your producer is a woman.
Yes, Jen McGrath.
It was definitely frightening for shoppers and employees who were in the store at the time as several thieves entered.
And some of this, it was caught on camera.
Some of it was caught.
They're searching for something.
Yeah.
Who's to say they're not playing finding Nemo?
Here's my issue with this.
They call this a victimless crime, but the reality is it's violent.
There are people that could get hurt, right?
No, this is a victimless crime.
Do you think that's victimless?
Yeah.
Do you really believe that's victimless?
Yeah.
You believe.
If I was a cop, I would say, I'm sorry, guys.
How has society failed you?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's crazy.
But literally, the DA and people like that are saying, and I'm open to the debate.
You know, that guard was in on it.
Yeah, the guard's absolutely in on it.
And not just because he's black.
Yeah.
Just because he didn't move.
Right.
Just because he was waving and saying, hey, what's up?
I'll see you at home.
Yeah, I'll see you.
You got my bag right to what I told you to grab.
Here's the thing about when me and him get together.
It sounds racist, but it's not.
But it's not.
No.
It's not.
That's the thing, but it's actually not.
I actually think he was maybe a Dominican.
You're hearing things, but it's not what it sounds like.
No, no, no, no.
He just wasn't moving.
Yeah, he's just not, but he was just kind of like...
He was just kind of.
But I get it because he's not getting paid a lot.
I'm not going to die to guard a tote bag.
Yeah.
They're saying it's a victimless crime.
Now take your headphones off because now we can't ball this.
Now that looks odd, yeah.
People are running into these stores.
It's smash and grab.
People are going, hey, it's a victimless crime.
Lighten up.
Who cares?
Don't worry about it.
It's a brilliant crime.
You roll in with 40 people.
There's too many people to arrest.
Right.
It's pandemonium.
And people walk out with a couple of Fendi bags.
Yeah.
Big deal.
Well, it is a big deal.
Who's getting hurt?
A lot of people.
A lot of people.
Like who?
Here's who's getting hurt with this.
Timmy, one person who got hurt by this.
I got to prove it right now.
Yeah.
The people that are going to lose their jobs when these stores close.
Because that's what happened in San Francisco.
So everybody that works in the store, and then the store is basically going to go, we are not going to stay here just like they did in San Francisco.
What color are the people working there?
Everybody who...
I mean, is this even allowed on Apple Podcasts?
I don't even know.
I'm just saying that's, because look at all the stores that are leaving.
These are all the places that are leaving San Francisco, all the places that are leaving.
Okay?
Right.
Off.
Marshalls, Creighton Barrel, H ⁇ M, Uniqlo, Anthropology, Abercrombie and Fitch, Nordstroms, Nordstrom, Sachs, Gap, DSW.
Now, you're a conspiratorially oriented guy.
So let me ask you a question.
Is this disaster capitalism?
Will Naomi Klein write a book about this?
Is this Blackstone intentionally throwing these flash mobs in there so the prices dip down?
No.
They get it going out of business sales.
They turn it into one big Costco.
No, I think it's paralysis capitalism.
I think that people are paralyzed and don't know what to do.
And I think that we've gotten ourselves into a predicament where unfortunately the levers of government and bureaucracy are grinding at a pace where nothing can get done and nothing, unfortunately, there's no will.
Nobody has any will anymore to make something happen.
So people are just stuck trying to be a good person going like, hey, man, I don't know.
I wasn't in that store.
I wasn't affected.
I don't live in downtown San Francisco.
I live in Marin County.
I got a mansion.
I'm not going to worry about it until they're in my window.
I don't think people are worried about anything that's not directly affecting them.
And I think the politicians are just saying whatever they have to say to seem like they're good people and that they're, you know, evolved and that they are considering all the angles.
And I think it's paralysis.
I mean, listen, these are the wealthiest people in the world.
It's weird they're letting this happen.
I understand conspiracy theories, people going, why are they doing this?
Why are they letting it happen?
Right.
I think it's paralysis.
I think it's people just not wanting to say the uncomfortable things you would need to say to fix this.
Like that was a crime.
Like that's a crime.
That's illegal.
Like those people need to go to jail.
Like people that are doing heroin on the street are not just poor.
Like people that live in tent cities, in many cases, are choosing to live there and use drugs because it's an open-air drug market where they can procure the drugs that they're addicted to.
Those are unpopular things to say.
Right.
What you're essentially saying is optics have become more important than reality.
100%.
They're more concerned with the optics than they are the reality.
And we've created a world where people are not affected.
That's the thing.
People are not affected by how bad it's getting in the next town.
Not yet.
They're not yet.
Not yet.
But here's the thing.
It's always, it's like anything else, right?
If you ignore something and it festers, it becomes eventually a problem that has to get dealt with.
Raising in the sun.
It explodes.
But when people go, oh, these flash mobs, what do you think drove all those stores out of San Francisco?
This shit.
Inequality.
And then, by the way, if there's no stores, people don't want to live in San Francisco.
And then people, I don't want to live downtown.
My wife can't go to the store.
My gay husband, who's a twink, can't go to the store, whatever it is.
We know lesbians can always go anywhere no matter what.
But there are certain people that are more delicate and more important to society than lesbians, let's be frank.
They're the Marines, the gentrification.
Sure, they are, but what else do they do?
I know they can pickle things.
They can throw a softball pretty well.
They can run a bar.
They can hit you with a bat.
They can build a shot frame.
But I mean, are they evolving culture?
Let's be honest.
My point is the reality is this is the beginning of a rot in a city that comes to, you know, comes to be a bad omen for a lot of things.
So those are the people that get hurt.
All the legislators are hijacked by gotcha politics.
Everyone's doing slam dunks on each other.
Nobody's talking about policy.
You watch these debates and local level all the way up to the federal level.
It's just all personal attacks.
It's like we're watching Wild and Out.
It's like a disc battle.
It's just going like, and you're going like, all right, we're hearing about Hunter Biden's emails or Hillary's emails or Trump's indictment.
You're going, does anyone want to talk about policy?
Yeah, does anyone want to talk about how we can stop the mob from, you know, who has policy ideas?
Has there been a flash mob for food?
Does anyone run into like California pizza kitchen with guns?
Well, this is.
And go, what is the, because by the way, everyone's just talking about how they're starving.
Well, that's all AOC talks about these people are starving and they are starving.
Fendi bags are worth a lot.
And so they all sell these bags.
Right.
They sell these bags.
Say money for food.
Groceries.
I will say this.
They all did look thin.
If you want to catch all those guys, all you got to do is put cameras on at Whole Foods.
Get the George Gascon thing up where he goes, you know, he's talking about.
And this is the DA of, I believe, Los Angeles, right?
Yeah.
And this is the DA of LA when he's asked about these things.
Because by the way, I don't really shop that much.
So I don't, you know, I understand not caring about this.
Right.
But it is something where I look at it and I go, oh, this is the beginning of something that could probably, you know, be weird.
So it's just hitting you now that things are bad?
Well, no, no, no.
I just, these are, it's a new, the flash mob is kind of interesting.
Oh, it's been around for a long time.
It's been around for a long time.
It's a little fun.
It is fun.
Yeah.
I get the appeal of it.
Like, by the way, I'm a human being.
I understand it's fun going, let's run in, let's grab some shit and let's leave.
Here's George Gascon here.
Yeah, this guy looks like a deer in headlights.
I mean, this guy is just the DA.
Yeah.
Right now, in the face of the flash mobs.
Yeah, he's got soft eyes.
He doesn't really know what to do.
And he's being asked a question.
And here, put on the headphones.
Yeah, let's hear what he says.
And you could hear them.
Oh, God.
He looks like the old culture.
Every tool available under the law when there is an arrest made to make sure that this individuals are held accountable.
LA Mayor Karen Bass also spoke about accountability, saying in part, quote, those who committed these acts and acts like it in neighboring areas must be held accountable.
But not everyone feels like local leaders are delivering on that promise.
Businessman Rick Caruso said, quote, I have heard directly from small business owners who feel defeated by the lack of accountability for criminals.
What do you say to the person who points a finger at you saying that there are people in this community who believe they can get away with serious crime in LA County and not be held accountable?
Well, I would ask you the question.
What would you tell them when you just heard me speaking right now?
Because I think you have a responsibility also for addressing it.
We will use every tool available under the law.
The journalist has a responsibility.
Get out there and make a citizen arrest.
Why is this guy not in Miami?
Yeah.
Sitting on a cabana.
Yeah.
I mean, he's perfect.
They're like, what are you talking about?
We got a brother here.
You have to feed it yourself.
I mean, we are here, Bonnie America.
You know what's coming here.
You come here.
They get the hat back.
Everybody have to be responsible for what they do.
We see the people.
We're going to make them responsible.
We're in Los Angeles.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know what that is, what his thing is.
Why he's even.
See, these people don't care about appointed.
These guys aren't elected.
Our DA is elected.
He's elected.
Yeah.
Who votes for this stuff?
They don't know.
I've lived there five years.
Who's voting?
Morgan Morgan Legal Advice00:02:47
And how long are these terms?
Yeah, Comptroller is also elected.
I can't tell you what he does.
Yeah, right.
They recalled the guy in San Fran, this guy Chesa Bootin.
They recalled him.
They were like, you are really fucking up.
Oh, that guy.
He was basically like telling people that we're stabbed to get over it.
Yeah, he was going, stop locking your store at night.
Right.
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Yeah, I mean, so what's going on up there?
I just read this tweet.
Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, a now indicted Austin investor Nate Paul, set up a fake Uber account Paxton used to see his lover revealing the extent of the men's ties and benefits Paxton received by helping Paul as the FBI targeted him a new impeachment trial filing.
Religious Shows and Expensive Food00:15:01
Says, I mean, anyone who gets into politics is really just trying to do it in most cases to have enough power to kind of like cover up whatever crimes they're committing.
Yeah.
That seems to be it.
And whatever gay thoughts they may have.
Maybe.
I mean, nobody, because by the way, is there a shittier life than being a politician?
Like, if you're an honest person that has, yeah, but look at all the other better.
If you're a really bright, smart guy, there's finance, there's tech, there's entertainment.
You could do whatever you want.
Politics does seem to attract a certain type of person that wants to have the power, maybe to cover up shit they do.
Right.
Right.
It's weird.
Like I was talking to Louie about it.
It's like there's just a specific type of guy that gets into politics that rises through the ranks that stays in it.
No different from any other field, though.
No, it is, though.
People who don't sweat when a body goes down is people who get to the top.
That's true.
People with low empathy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We'll always rise to the top.
Yeah.
So you need, you need not have empathy is the is really you really it's it it it's helpful in our country to be a sociopath.
Helpful.
It's an understatement.
Yeah.
Who wants to be encumbered by guilt or morals or but our job I don't think so because I think you got to relate to people.
Right, right.
Yeah.
And Amy Schumer didn't turn down the Barbie movie because it wasn't feminist enough.
Right.
Like she said.
Right.
Well, I support, I support her.
I don't support that movie because she was not Barbie.
She should have been Barbie.
Should have been Barbie.
I would have someone from our community.
Yeah, that's it.
So we got some fucking London broad taking our jobs.
Did you see Barbie?
Of course not.
Oh, a lot of people saw it.
I haven't seen it.
No, yeah, no, I put on my pink dress and checked it out.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I haven't seen it.
I don't really have an opinion on it.
By the way.
I went to Oppenheimer.
Yeah.
I saw that.
A little long.
A little long.
Brilliant at the end.
But by the way, it's a bit long.
Everyone's walking.
No one needs three hours of anything now.
Yeah.
And why does every scene start with people walking?
Yeah.
Well, it just gives you that feeling that.
Yeah, it's like a rap video meets a 60 minutes interview.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's Michael Bay.
I wish I could play the trailer for the thing that I'm not allowed to talk about because I'm in SAG because it's a good trailer, but I won't talk about it.
It doesn't matter.
Which thing is that?
A thing I didn't do that I'm not promoting that I'm not allowed to discuss because I'm in the screen act.
Are you in the Screen Actors Guild?
I don't think I'm in Hollywood.
I don't know.
Get out!
You could say it.
Yeah, I know.
I think you had to be, though, because you did comedy section.
I'm sure I'm in it.
But listen, let's...
Why should you get out there with a fucking sign and put your money where your mouth is?
Because I'm playing the long game.
I'm preparing for the Christian Ayatollah who's going to come back and throw gays in prisons.
90%.
I'm straight.
I like women.
90% of actors protesting this have never worked.
They'd have no money.
This is true.
And they're out there.
87% of people in SAG make less than $26,000 a year.
Right.
So it's unfortunate.
Move to Austin.
It's tough.
I can't afford that.
It's more expensive than L.A.
Well, live under a bridge.
What do you want me to tell you?
Austin is so expensive right now.
I was reading about it.
It is a crunch.
If you were living in that city over the last few years and you haven't found a way to financially better yourself, you are fucked.
Joe better get more bodyguards.
A family of four estimated monthly costs is now $42.41 without rent, by the way.
Listen to that again.
A family of four estimated monthly costs, Austin, $42.41 without rent.
Right.
The zombies are going to storm the comedy mothership at some point.
No, they're going to get up there and start to incess and kill Tony.
Yeah.
No, it's a very expensive city now.
You know, because this is what happened.
When things get hot, Miami is the most, it's like the most expensive city in America.
I know, it's become a little unbearable.
And I love Miami, so I hate to say that.
Yeah, Miami's become so expensive that people just can't, they're just diving into the ocean.
Well, that's the thing about Californians.
They're swimming back to Cuba.
Yeah.
The Californians move places and they make it more expensive, but they make them worse.
That's true.
Yeah.
Californians don't, they're not, they don't have the right type of edge to them.
They don't have the fun type of edge.
No.
They're like, they got their socks and shoes off.
They're putting pecans and salads.
The problem with people from that state is they're too laid back.
Yes.
And what happens is they don't care about anything.
And then what happens is eventually someone does care and whoever cares is a problem.
Yeah, anyone I meet in Los Angeles either doesn't care or they're like manic on pills.
Yeah.
There's no in between.
Yeah.
There's no middle class there.
There's nobody who's there's no middle class of sanity in Los Angeles.
There's nobody who's a little crazy.
No, right.
Everybody is full nuts or checked out.
They're checked out.
Like you'll see this families in Malibu.
They're all dressed in white.
They look like a cult and they're just sitting there and they're kind of eating strawberry sorbet and they're all just staring at each other.
And you go, yeah, they don't care that everybody is a flash mind.
Maybe the flash mobs get bigger.
I don't know which side to join.
Maybe I shouldn't be.
Maybe I should just start flash mobbing.
Like there will get to a point where we have to pick a side.
We have to go, is it the flash mob?
Because maybe they're stronger and more powerful.
So there is a point where, you know.
Just always side with the Christian Ayatollah's.
Yeah.
That's where you got to go.
They're probably going to go back to church and just pretend.
There is going to be, I do feel a swing back to evangelical Christianity for order.
It's the only thing that can put Pandora back in the box.
It's the only thing that can put the jack back in the box.
It's the only thing that can hold this thing together.
Get raped by the people you know and trust.
That's right.
Yeah, that's right.
Someone you call father.
Right.
Someone, right.
Because the people forget that the real human trafficking.
I mean, obviously there's examples of it everywhere, but like a lot of it is organized religion.
Most of it.
A lot of it is organized.
A lot of religion.
And by the way, even during the Franklin scandal, those kids were coming out of Boys Town.
There's always been.
The Catholic Church was set up by Roman noblemen to rape children.
Well, listen, I'm out of my mother's wake tomorrow.
Let's not talk about the Catholic Church in a negative way.
What do you mean?
Let's not talk about it at all.
No, they've done a lot of good things.
If you've been to St. Patrick's Cathedral, it's stunning.
Yeah, but everyone gets it.
Limestone is stunning, by the way.
They had to stand outside and guard it with hatchets.
Real estate means something.
It's beautiful.
It's gorgeous.
If I wanted to rape a bunch of children, I would have targeted the Irish too, because you people don't say nothing and nobody's going to be able to do it.
Take a look at how beautiful that is.
Get up how many fucking, how much limestone is in that church?
It's a lot.
Do you know how many little boys were fed to bishops like tokens to make that thing?
Are you Catholic or not?
I'm not Catholic.
Oh my God, what are you?
I'm Greek Orthodox.
That's a freak church.
No.
You know, you have a weird thing that looks like a mosque by ground zero?
Yes, and it looks like a mosque.
And we rebuilt it.
What is that?
What is the Greek Orthodox church?
It's Catholicism with lamb.
Basically.
Except the priests can marry.
Okay, I like that.
We're expected to marry.
I like that.
And we don't rape millions of boys.
But here's the deal.
You have no money.
Your country's bankrupt.
That's correct.
You do not have a Vatican or a Vatican Bank.
Right.
You have zero power.
Yes.
Yes.
We do make a killer frappe.
And you have great, and I like Avra.
We love it.
Restaurant Avra in Beverly Hills and New York, but the Beverly Hills one's a little better.
We have the healthiest diet, and we love to talk about antiquity the same way.
But also, we can't exempt the Greeks from the charge of pedophilia.
Let's be honest.
No, they started it like everything.
Let's be honest.
Yeah, they're just.
Let's just stay.
We can't say that they had nothing to do with that.
They started it.
That's like saying that Irish people have nothing to do with alcoholism.
When in popular culture, it's all they've ever done is be drunks.
Right.
Because a lot of them are drunks.
But it wasn't like ordinary Greek citizens in Athens or Sparta were raping children.
It was the elites in those city-states, just like throughout every empire, the Ottomans and the Sultans and the Rus empires.
I'm sure other people were doing it, but they're the ones who got away with it.
Right.
Well, people get rich and powerful and they get weird.
You want to drink the blood of children.
What do you want from me?
Yeah.
But the Catholic Church, they do it.
They're the Michael Jordan of raping children.
I know, but don't you see any positives with the Catholic Church?
Because let's be very honest, there are positives.
What are they?
The positives of the Catholic Church?
What are they?
It's the one true faith.
Okay.
I forgot about that.
It has the most stunning real estate in the world.
It's feminist because they love Mary.
It's the most stunning real estate in the world.
Some of the most stunning art in the world.
Right.
We're talking about Rome.
We're talking about a civilization here that has lasted for a very long time.
The antiquity, the magic, the rituals, the spirits.
It's important.
Okay, you won me over.
I forgot about it.
How many do you think they've got away with?
They did a recent expose in France, and since the 70s, I think they came up with 300,000 children.
It's probably 10 times that.
My point is this.
That's just France.
It's a particular area.
Who is leaving their kids alone with priests?
Who is letting your kid be an altar boy?
Bolivians.
You should watch your kid in a church like the way you'd watch them in Times Square.
You should.
Yes.
Yeah, no, I was never an altar boy.
If they're doing that in France, what do you think they're doing in Bolivia?
I know there's bad things happening.
Here's the thing.
How many people have been abused by the Catholic Church?
Report estimates that 216, 216,000 children were abused by the Catholic priests between 1950 and 2020.
It's probably so much more.
I mean, come on.
Catholic Church employees increased the total number to 330 because they saw it.
Well, listen, it's weird.
Listen, being a priest and saying, I'm not going to marry and I'm not going to have any sex my whole life, right?
It would attract people that have problems, right?
No, I think it was set up for that.
It was set up for that.
And they recruit.
Yeah, because think about it.
Look at the confession.
Well, it was only blackmail.
Let me finish.
Then they take the women and they remove them and put them in the convent.
The women got to go someplace else.
Who tends to blow the whistle on abusive children?
Women.
Right.
Right.
So it's brilliantly.
But you know that priests could marry up until a point where they decided that they didn't want priests leaving their property to their sons.
Oh.
So it was actually a money thing, like everything else.
It started about money, and the church was like, we want all this property.
We don't want priests to own it.
So we don't want priests marrying and then having heirs.
I just like to look at the data and go, hmm, maybe it's set up for that if we're talking those type of numbers.
Yes, Giannis, but you know what?
Every single religion has a lot of problems and there's a lot of molestation in every religion.
And not every religion has a lot of money.
Except Islam has no problems.
I agree with that.
Yeah.
That's right.
We're in agreement.
I agree with that.
Absolutely.
I agree.
I agree too.
I agree.
Yeah.
And Judaism.
Judaism has none.
You know what?
I agree with that.
Except for those two.
I agree with Judaism being not a problem.
Whatever.
Whatever.
Yeah.
Everything Israel does is cool.
Catholic and Protestants are the problem.
Islam and Judaism?
Not.
Protestants are...
Listen, and I don't want to say anything wrong here.
I don't want to say anything wrong.
Right.
I will.
Protestants are dirty pig people.
They're dirty pig people.
We agree.
Again.
Sorry.
Do you have a coffee?
Oh, yes, thank you.
But you, we have no kieks.
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God ondra!
God ondra!
They're kind of like their churches are like shacks to disgust.
They set up shop wherever.
They are.
Hey, is your church?
If you, if I'm walking into a building on Christmas and it's not nice, what are we doing?
Yeah.
What are we doing?
It's like the bar show scene of religion.
You know, Telecare still exists, which is a Catholic church channel.
Telecare.
It's like long, like my grandparents used to watch it.
And my grandparents used to watch Bill Donahue, who's like the head of the Catholic League and all these people, right?
Is it still on?
It's got to be still on.
Yeah, I think so.
It's on Verizon Fios in Long Island.
And it's Channel 271, and you can watch Telecare.
Now, I want you, so can we play a little of this here?
This is a Catholic faith.
Like, this is the type of stuff that they would have.
Now, obviously, this is from a while ago.
But this is the type of stuff.
This is from 2012.
I love it.
But this is the type of stuff that they would have on Long Island television.
Dude, I remember all my, I had so many Irish friends.
I would go to Catholic church.
I'd eat the wafer.
I remember.
My grandparents would watch things like this.
Let's take a look.
Everybody, I'm on the brand new set of our news program, Everyday Faith Live.
I hope you had a great summer.
Martina Jim Florn here to tell you that next week it all starts on Telecare.
New season, new episodes of Everyday Faith Live, all kinds of new and exciting stuff.
We've been working all summer long to give you brand new programming that speaks to faith, that speaks to spirituality, and that informs you about our Catholic faith in this world.
So don't forget, tune into Everyday Faith Live.
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Catholic Church Cooking Shows00:08:11
Now they probably have podcasts, right?
I mean, there's no way they haven't evolved with the times.
All I know is that the...
Don't you have any respect for the size and the sheer scope of the Catholic Church?
They're the second biggest landowner in Washington, D.C. Is that not something that impresses you?
That is very impressive.
Thank you.
The first biggest landowner was the federal government.
Four weeks ago, is that telecare?
This is Catholic Faith Network.
Let's see what that is.
Let's see what this guy's doing.
Catholic, no, the one that's up there from a couple of weeks ago.
Okay, here we go.
Yeah, reflection.
Oh, this was in France.
It's in Spanish.
It's in Spanish.
You know, it's funny.
I'm now forgetting.
Every one of these people.
But they're very faithful.
That's why, the Hispanics.
Every one of these guys looks the part.
They all looked apart.
They all kind of looked apart.
Well, Bill Donahue, the Catholic League, was this guy who would just come out.
And again, you know, you had to, it was interesting during the Iraq War, and they had to come out and go, torture is Catholic.
Like Catholics.
I got it.
You know what I mean?
Like Catholics to shows on Long Island, like Bill O'Reilly and all those guys who tried to get his wife excommunicated.
They had to, it was a challenge because they had to come out and basically go, you know, enhanced interrogation is actually like Catholic.
And so these housewives in Long Island, New York that were watching and hearing the news reports of like, you know, people being, you know, naked and stacked in pyramids and having dogs bark at them and being beaten and waterboarded.
These guys had to come out and say, this is, God doesn't have a huge problem with this.
No, no, no.
God's actually okay with this.
Yeah, we're ready to apologize to Galileo's family and descendants.
Right, right.
So that was what it was very interesting.
It's an arm, you know, the kind of the Catholic Church is, it's always been kind of an arm of the political realities of whatever time we're in.
Right.
It's a, you know, it's a public relations thing.
Big time.
Big time.
But, but, but, but maybe it's true.
Yeah.
Maybe there's some truth to it.
There might be some truth to it.
Boston Globe wrote about it, but who can trust the media nowadays anyway?
But but here's the deal.
The church is not the crimes the church has committed.
The church is the people.
The church is not the crime.
The church is not.
It's not God.
The church is God.
You have something?
So Telecare became the Catholic faith network.
Put something on from this.
So they have a cooking show with preachers now.
That's good.
But this is what we want.
Catholic content.
Real food.
And you know what it's about?
It's about cooking real food for God.
Real food.
I mean, this guy.
He's great.
I mean, this guy.
He doesn't turn down extra.
But he goes, you want seconds?
He wants to.
They were going to be going against the grain and preparing two quick and healthy meals using two grains barley and fat.
This guy's a boy addiction and a food addiction.
Hey, let's not call the guy a pedophile with absolutely no evidence.
None at all.
I'm sorry to maybe suspect.
He's like, the thing I like about these grains is they're young.
They're really young.
He's talking about barley.
Now, it's a funny thing with barley.
I don't know about your life.
When I was a little guy, my mother used to make beef barley soup, you know, from scratch.
But barley was always kind of something that they fooled me with.
They told me that was a pasta.
So I used to think that barley was like a kind of macaroni.
And then when I found out it was a grain, I didn't want to eat it anymore.
So that's kind of the interesting thing.
So now when you go to like your specialty supermarkets, they're subtle with this guy.
You know, that have basketball food.
Stuff already made, and you can buy a little pound of this and a pound of that and take it home.
One of the things that's on every single supermarket food kind of display is barley, a barley salad.
And it's so inexpensive and so easy to make.
We shouldn't be afraid of these grains.
You think he slipped on your side of these greens?
Don't be afraid of these greens.
Don't be afraid.
Sometimes you make them in dark rooms.
You think he slipped up a couple takes?
He's like, we love the boys.
I mean, grains.
I mean, grains.
Now, what I'm making right now does not have meat in it.
But I love dick.
Did I say that?
But I like meat.
I like pre-pupis.
We'll see that later.
I'm just going to show you.
Another take.
So we're going to start with, first of all, is some asparagus.
I love asparagus.
Asparagus is just a, it's a terrific energy.
It's the boy of food.
Did I say that?
So it's a great one to kind of utilize.
Let's cut the edges off.
Now, sometimes people break them.
So I'll show you one way you like.
I break the spirit of pre-pubetis.
We're sitting in the natural spot usually.
All right.
We're already off.
This episode is.
You're already being banned from everything.
YouTube's getting with it.
I'm just saying we have no proof of anything.
I don't know.
We're just joking.
We're joking.
We're joking.
And actually, we didn't accuse them of anything.
Right.
It's a Boston Glen.
I was never touched by a British.
Yeah, the AP.
You saw my best efforts.
Right.
You know, but here's the thing, man.
I mean, it's complicated, right?
Because I'm going to my mother's wake and it's we're doing a funeral mass and it's Catholic.
So what do you want me to do?
Like in your church, just look up the background.
Your church has problems too.
We do.
It is corruption, but we don't.
There's a lot of corruption.
We don't tend to have the child abuse that the Catholic Church is being used.
No, the Catholic Church has a serious problem.
They're being accused of it, at least.
I'm Jewish.
Right.
I support Israel.
I'm Jewish.
Can I be Jewish?
You can support Israel.
I do.
You can't be Jewish.
I think they should have all the land they want.
Absolutely.
Who cares?
They're never trying to conquer the world.
No.
People accuse them of it, but they're not.
I'm serious.
Why are people not mad at the Germans or Stalin or people who actually or us?
Israel's just saying, give me one kibbutz.
Little people are mad at the Germans and us.
They should.
But Israel, I think, you know, whatever they eat, that.
Booby, they want a tiny little schmeck.
Here's a little schmeckl.
That Palestinian toddler had a look in his eye.
He was going to do something.
He was a problem.
I don't know.
Giannis Papas, where can people find you, see you, enjoy your comedy stylings?
The Giannis Pappas.
Yeah, the Giannis Pappas Hour is my podcast.
I think you really enjoy it.
Check it out.
See me on the road, New York City, Sony Hall, San Francisco, Portland, Vancouver, everywhere.
Go to YannisPappasComedy.com.
Come see us.
It's not just the abuse of Catholics.
No, because my grandparents.
They'd be so angry with you if they heard this.
I'm sorry to bring all this up, but you know.
But you know what it is?
I've heard a few rumors.
You do this a lot where you attack Catholics.
Because we're like some punching bag for your broke-ass people.
It's my fault what happened.
You're broke-ass pedophiles in Greece.
You're broke-ass pedophiles.
We do not have a lot of people.
You always shit on Catholics because you see our church.
You got a little mosque church down by ground zero.
We're on Fifth Avenue, motherfucker.
Good point.
Come see me, TimDillonComedy.com, where we will not be abusing the Catholic at all.
We understand that things happen.
Parks Casino in Philly, Los Angeles, Charlotte, Lexington, Cincinnati, Davenport, Omaha, Sacramento, Australia, Perth, Adelaide, Sydney, Melbourne, Auckland, Christchurch.
Those are in New Zealand.
Rochester, New York, New York, New York, Carnegie Hall, Pittsburgh, Music Call, Detroit, Michigan, Toronto, Ontario.
And that's pretty much the rest of the year.
The great Giannis Papas, Giannis Papas Hour on YouTube.
Go subscribe to that show right now.
Go see Giannis on Patreon.
Go see him live.
Tickets are available on your website.
What is your site?
YannisPapascomedy.com.
YannisPapasComedy.com.
Maybe you want to bring your grandparents in.
Hey, he'll tell them why everything they believe their whole life's a lie.