Tim Dillon (Miami native) was disgusted by the TwentySomethings Netflix show, talks about potentially working for the Minecraft zoomers (shoutout to Dream and Ranboo), why they couldn't keep doing the Undercover Boss show with actual ceo's, and the way the media reported on Waukesha, Wisconsin.Bonus episodes every week:▶▶ https://www.patreon.com/thetimdillonshowSee Tim Live on the road:▶▶ http://timdilloncomedy.com/#shows▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS:🩳 UNDERWEAR:Order with PROMO CODE Tim▶▶ https://www.sheathunderwear.com/🔒 VPN:Get three months free▶▶ https://www.expressvpn.com/timdillon🥣 CEREAL:Use code TimDillon for free shipping!▶▶ https://magicspoon.com/timdillon🔵 BLUE CHEW :Use promo TD▶▶ https://bluechew.com/🤖 MANSCAPED:Use code TIMD▶▶ https://www.manscaped.com/👨🦱 HAIR LOSS:▶▶ https://www.keeps.com/TimDillon📦 SHIPPING:Enter code TIMDILLON▶▶ https://www.shipstation.com/🎧 HEADPHONES:For 15% off!▶▶ https://www.buyraycon.com/tim🤳 COLOGNE AND SKINCARE:Use code TIM▶▶ https://hawthorne.co/🛏️ BEDS:▶▶ https://helixsleep.com/timdillon🚗 INSURANCE:▶▶ https://gabi.com/timdillon🚬 QUIT SMOKING:Use code TIM:▶▶ https://lucy.co💆THERAPY▶▶ https://www.betterhelp.com/TIMD📦 BOX OF AWESOME▶▶ http://boxofawesome.com use code TIMDILLON at checkout for 20% off💊 MASF SUPPLEMENTS▶▶ https://masfsupplements.com/ use code TIMD for 10% OFF🧴 DUKE CANNON DEODERANT▶▶ https://dukecannon.com/ use code DILLON for 10% off💍 NORTHBANDS RINGS▶▶ https://www.northbands.com/ use promo code TIM for 20% offCERTIFIED PIEDMONTESE BEEF▶▶ 25% OFF with discount code TIMDILLON at https://www.cpbeef.comHELLO FRESH▶▶ Go to https://www.hellofresh.com/timdillon12 for 12 free meals including free shipping!GET ACRE GOLD and start investing in physical Gold today!▶▶ https://www.GetAcreGold.com/TimDillonMAKE CRYPTO SIMPLE!▶▶ Visit https://Dchained.com/Inner-Circle and sign-up today.BIRD DOGS!▶▶ https://www.birddogs.com/ use code TIMDILLONDOORDASH▶▶ Download the Doordash app and enter code TIMDILLON to get 25% off.SIMPLI SAFE▶▶ https://simplisafe.com/timdillon to save 20%DRAFTKINGS▶▶ Download DraftKings app and use the code TIMDILLON to get a free shot at a one million dollar prizeCROWDHEALTH▶▶Just go to https://JoinCrowdHealth.com/fit and enter code TIMDILLON at sign up.That’s 30 days to try risk free plus the Fitness Wearable.WATCH GANG▶▶ https://watchgang.com promo code TIM to save 20%PHILO TV▶▶ https://philo.tv/timdillonGet 25% off your first two months!MINT MOBILE▶▶ https://mintmobile.com/timdillonGet your new wireless bill for 15 bucks a month!VERSUS GAME▶▶ https://apps.apple.com/us/app/versusgame/id1536931360Get five dollars toward your first bet use code TIM!LIGHTSTREAM▶▶ https://lightstream.com/timdillonSave with a credit card consolidation loan!▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃:📸 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/timjdillon/🐦 Twitter:https://www.twitter.com/TimJDillon🌍 Tim Dillon Live Dates!:http://timdilloncomedy.com/#shows📹 Subscribe to the channel:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC161r7ShBvMxfyzCtiSMRbgListen on Spotify!https://open.spotify.com/show/2gRd1woKiAazAKPWPkHjds ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ ▶▶ Ed McMahonbenavery33@gmail.comhttps://www.instagram.com/benaveryisgood/https://twitter.com/benaveryisgood ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬#TheTimDillonShow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Studio Burned Down by Antifa00:04:28
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dylan show.
We apologize for no video today.
We had a setback with our new studio.
It went on fire.
It was burned down by Antifa.
The Antifa burned down our studio.
They were young children dressed in black.
They came in, they threw Molotov cocktails through the window.
They beat me pretty badly.
I don't think Ben was in on it, but I can't know.
So we're doing an internal investigation.
It was a little weird.
Ben did let them in, much like the Capitol Riot.
He's now claiming that he didn't know they were dangerous, but they did not harm him, not a hair on his head.
I was beaten, and the studio was destroyed.
So we are again here one day late with an audio-only episode.
All right, I'm going to admit it.
That's a lie.
That didn't happen.
The reason that we have audio only is because we are at the end of a tour that has been a blood sport.
Now, I know you people don't care, and this is free.
And you say to yourself, Well, you make money on Patreon.
Yeah, but this ain't that.
And that's not late.
This is free.
You get what people get when they get free.
And the tour, we were on five planes in four days.
We are wrapping this up.
It's over soon, and we go back to, you know, we're going to do one tour a year.
I'm going to be out doing comedy clubs throughout the year, but we do one tour a year in theaters.
Thanks, you know, to everybody who bought a ticket.
And that tour is going to be the next tour will be next fall.
And we'll do, you know, October, November, December, a little bit of Jan, and then we shut it down.
And by that time, we'll have the studio.
Well, we should have it by January, right?
Yeah, by early January.
What's going on with it?
People think you're lying.
No, our guy, Mr. Pizza, he's building a great studio.
We're in contact every day.
But when you say Mr. Pizza, people think we're dealing with a pedophile.
So, but his name is actually Pizza.
His last name is Pizza.
It's actually his last name.
And all he eats is salmon.
And broccoli.
Odd.
But this gentleman, who you've entrusted our life to, he built the first studio with the great job.
Which everybody loved.
He did a great job.
Iconic, iconic set.
Yes, sure.
And now we have the new one, and you're saying, when is the date?
Give us a date.
Stop pushing things back.
Stop blaming the supply chain.
Start taking responsibility for what you should be doing.
The first week of January, I have full confidence it will be up and running.
We have everything ordered.
We have everything planned out.
We have the keys.
It is real.
It is a real thing.
Some people stopped me in the street in Atlanta and accused me of lying about this whole ordeal.
They should have stabbed you to make a point.
If you stop him in the street, physically maim him because he doesn't respond well to anything other than physical force.
But by the time we're on a tour like this next year, hopefully we will have a studio that allows us to be a little more consistent.
And it will be a less intense tour.
We'll have more time to this.
Was crazy.
You know, every comic in America was booking venues.
You had to take what you can get.
This thing was routed crazy.
We're here.
We're there, but we're winding down now.
And the UK thing, we, you know, listen, it's not looking good.
And we would love to go.
It doesn't look good.
I don't want to get stuck in the UK.
This Omicron or whatever it is, they're at level four.
They may be going to level five.
You know, so we're playing it by ear.
But the fear is that we are going to be in a situation where we may have to push those dates down the road.
Boris Johnson's saying pubs, shops, and restaurants will probably be forced to shut in January as it ripples.
Boris Johnson delivering the bad news.
Austin, Texas, where we find ourselves right now.
Yes.
The worst city in America or the worst city in the world?
That is the question.
Leaving Austin for Miami Life00:15:10
I should tweet that.
And fuck Elon Musk if he doesn't like it.
And I love my friend Joe Rogan.
But you know what?
If he doesn't like it, he can go scratch too.
Because this was the worst idea ever.
Let's move a bunch of libertarian billionaires who don't care about anyone but themselves to a city and see if they can create a thriving community.
Well, it didn't work.
Did it?
You've got a bunch of billionaires here with their own armies and their own apps.
And then you've got everybody else wandering around in the streets, killing each other.
Austin, I've spent a year here.
I've lived here for a year.
We are nearing the end of that.
And just to add insult to repeated injury, Netflix, and you know I love Netflix.
I love Netflix.
I love that they won't give me a special.
I love that they don't care how many tickets I've sold.
They don't care that I've done a special on their platform.
They offered me a half hour.
I turned it down.
Although watch Normand and all those, I love Mark and I love Brian Simpson and Naomi Peregrine.
There's some really funny people doing that.
But I said, no, we're going to do an hour or we're not doing anything.
And then they said, no, no, no, we don't have the time for that.
We don't have the space.
And I'm like, isn't it the internet?
Don't you have unlimited space?
Literally unlimited.
So I love Netflix and I didn't, I'm not doing their Netflix Comedy Festival.
Every American, every comic in the United States is doing that festival.
I'm just not going to do it.
I'm sitting it out.
But Netflix, they've, and listen, here's what I will say about Netflix.
They have made, how long has Netflix been around?
Like 2008.
Get the exact number on that.
Because I will give credit where credit is due to Netflix.
It was founded in 97, actually.
Okay.
Let's just say in the last 15 years, Netflix has made six or seven watchable things, which I appreciate as a consumer, right?
Yeah.
I think that's good.
Every two and a half to three years on average, they make something that you can watch.
And I think that's good.
Here's what I will say about the new program that I binge watched the other day.
It's called 20 Somethings Austin, Texas.
If there was a show designed to make me physically ill and also give me more pleasure than I knew possible, it is the show 20 Somethings Austin, Texas.
Now, you guessed it.
The show is a real world ripoff where Netflix moved four women and four men self-identified into two Airbnbs next to each other in a gentrifying area of Austin, Texas.
Ironically, we stayed at one of these Airbnbs.
I believe we did, yeah.
The night before I had that sit-down with Joe Rogan and Alex Jones.
Netflix moved these people into Austin, Texas, because they wanted to reinvent themselves.
They wanted to realize their dreams.
One of them moved to do stand-up comedy.
One of them moved to be gay, literally.
A guy who said, I don't know how to be gay.
I came out late.
I want to learn how to be gay.
And one of them moved to be a whore.
You know, one of them moved to model.
And the model's not that good looking and the stand-up isn't funny.
It's Austin, right?
So we've got C and D level people flocking to this city, I guess, in Texas to take advantage of this growing, glistening city on the hill, as promised by Elon Musk.
And all of these people are showcased in this Netflix show.
And you see them.
And the entire show, of course, is about people imbibing in alcohol because that is the only thing to do here is to drink yourself to death.
And these people come and they drink and they try to get jobs and they can't get jobs.
And they are then forced to, they're in the dating scene and they are going on dates and they're going to these little shitty Austin, you know, bars.
They're riding mechanical bulls and they are coming out of the closet.
And the show is so painfully sad.
It is sad.
It is sad because the city of Austin, Texas is a lie.
And the people that are falling for the lie are, they are impossible to pity.
They are impossible to feel bad for.
You cannot have any feeling other than slowly watching them become the type of person that likes this place, which is a drunken loser.
There is no very few exceptions to that rule.
And watching this show, watching these people, you know, fail at bartending, watching these people try to have intrapersonal relationships with each other.
They all seem to be somewhat relatively, they're novices to life.
I mean, it's college, except they're all in their mid to late 20s.
And they don't know how to relate to other people and they don't get it.
And this is the city for them.
It is a city for people that are behind.
People that are behind.
They're not out in front.
They're not winning the race.
They are behind.
And they're moving here to assume this identity of this free, like all these people are like, I just, I'm going to be in Austin.
I just want to be free.
I just want to do what I want.
You can do what you want anywhere, dummy.
What you're saying is you want to do what you want and you want it to work because it never worked anywhere else.
That's what it is.
I want to be free to make horrible decisions and have them work out.
That's what they want.
I want to be free.
I'm a free spirit.
I'm about me.
I'm about me.
What do you think they were about where they came from?
Others?
They were about them there.
And they failed miserably there.
Because you can't just be about you if you is shit.
If what you're selling is shit, then you can't be about you.
You got to be about another version of you.
But you see with the show, and I watched all of the episodes pretty much.
I have a few left to go, and I will stay with it because I think maybe at the end there'll be, I don't know, a fire or something that really speaks to me.
But it's amazing.
People here have the same like crackpot idea of like I love Joe to death, but when Joe's like, I like Austin because LA is a bunch of people trying to get famous.
It's like your friends are Elon Musk.
He doesn't exactly issue the spotlight.
He lives in an area with people like Sandra Bullock.
I mean, these are not simple country people.
This idea that like, I'm just a simple country man.
I'm a simple country man.
And I'm here in Texas with Sandra Bullock and Elon Musk.
Two simple country people.
That's not what it is.
People in Austin are more self-important and more fame hungry than anyone in LA.
Truly.
Truly.
This idea of LA is not even real.
Yes, does everyone want to be famous in LA?
Sure, but at least some of them have a fucking shot.
At least some of them are fucking hot.
At least some of them know how to play the game.
You know, you come here, these people want the same notoriety, the same fame.
They want money.
And yet they are all completely incapable of getting anywhere near that goal.
It's a hellscape.
It's a pit.
Truly a pit.
I'm not going to spend the whole thing on this, but just watch the show.
If you think I am wrong, watch the show.
I've been in Miami looking at condos because I'm Afro-Latino, which means that I am black, but I am not African-American.
I was raised in Santo Domingo, and I am Dominican, and I'm Afro-Latino.
I am going to be pursuing COMPA, which is the music of Little Haiti.
As someone who is Afro-Latino, I no longer want to live in a white society like Austin, Texas with Ben, who doesn't like or understand Miami because when I dress in Balenciaga, he thinks I look stupid, but he looks like a golfer with AIDS.
He looks like a golfer who sucks cock on the side and got a mouthful of AIDS in his bloody gums, and he's going to drop fucking dead.
So when I go to Miami and look like the shit and inspire men, women, and children and everyone in between, Ben gets threatened by it because he wants to be on a fucking golf tee sucking someone off because he looks like a golfer with human immunodeficiency virus.
Truly, he just wears these baggy clothes.
He looks like all his shirts hide AIDS lesions.
So he says, oh, you look so stupid.
But actually, no, you dumb bitch.
I don't look stupid.
You look stupid because you're a stupid white piece of shit.
But I'm Afro-Latino.
It's true.
I can say the N-word, but I will not.
But I will not.
I'm not going to, but I can.
Because I am an other.
And that's why I feel comfortable in Miami because that is where my culture is.
So I was looking at condos in Miami because other than being in L.A., I want somewhere outside of LA to go.
And it's not going to be this pit.
It's not going to, we just had the best tacos in Austin.
Man, they were fine.
Yeah, good.
Fine.
Good.
Why is Taco Bell some of the best Mexican food you have?
Because food is an idea.
Do you understand what I mean?
Tacos are an idea.
Tacos are about freedom.
All these people moving to Austin, just have a taco.
That's all you want to do.
You just want to get drunk and have a taco outside.
That's the entire city.
You don't have to buy a plane ticket.
Just get drunk, buy a taco, and eat it in a place that is not enclosed with a roof because that's all you have to do.
But Taco Bell is so good because it's an idea.
It's the idea of freedom.
It's the idea of fuck it.
Tacos are about fuck it.
Austin, fuck it.
I'm going to be free.
I'm having a taco.
I don't care.
I'm fun.
I'm fun and flirty.
I'm going to have a handheld, crunchy thing because I'm fun and I'm flirty and we're eating outside because there are no rules.
I'm 38 years old and it's time to start living my life in Austin, Texas.
I want some fucking young dude from UT to go down on my old gnarled puss with his fucking beer breath and I want him to lick my snatch and then throw his half-card average sized cock in and out of me on this futon in a gentrifying neighborhood and I want to come to the sound of gunshots and then I want to wake up tomorrow, eat brisket and do it all over again.
No, thank you.
I'm Afro-Latino and I'm leaving.
I'm truly Afro-Latino.
I'm not apologizing for it anymore.
I love Miami.
They like me too.
They don't give a shit.
People, asses are out.
Tits are out.
They're like, what is Me Too?
Throw me to a wall.
Fuck me.
It's a sexy city.
Austin is sexless.
Miami is white marble floors and cocaine.
People trying to fuck each other.
Austin, Texas is a, is the sex in Austin, Texas, and I've had some of it.
It is sad.
It's, you just keep thinking about, one of the guys I went out with literally said to me, I came out as gay.
My parents did an exorcism on me, but I didn't care.
I was high as shit.
So that's the caliber of human being.
Another guy I hung out with said, I came out as gay.
My father drove me around and said, you're going to burn in hell.
And I didn't say anything.
And he drove me around in his car and then let me out.
So everybody here has a little bit of baggage.
And the sex here is just, it's that kind of gross, like weird collegiate sex without any of the heat that you'd imagine young college people fucking has.
It just, it just, it's, it's like sex that is you're trying to fuck your way into being someone you're not.
Like you're like, oh, because everybody's putting so much pressure on themselves here to have experiences because life has that about me.
So when you're hooking up with somebody here, they're really trying.
Have you ever hooked up with someone who's really trying?
Like they're really trying to a point where it's like, calm down, stop it.
No one kisses like that.
People are crazy here.
They're just really trying to have this animalistic experience, but it's really, it's not animalistic in a good way.
It's roadkill.
It's roadkill sex.
Whereas Miami is sexy.
Regulating Fat People in Corporations00:15:22
People like me that are international.
People look at me.
They don't think American.
They think international.
That I'm an international person.
I work on my body.
I work on the way I look.
I have an international flair.
I will start wearing skin-tight cat suits.
I will start wearing eight-inch heels.
I don't care if you don't want to be my fan anymore.
This is going to be my future.
Because I'm out.
I'm leaving the world of discussions and debates and point-counterpoint.
I'm done with all that shit.
I'm going to put my pussy on the street in a Balenciaga onesie and probably start smoking crystal.
Because this country's finished and there's absolutely no point in debating anybody about fucking anything anymore.
Just go out and have some goddamn fun, but not in Texas.
Or not in Austin at least.
Go to Dallas.
Suck off some CFO.
But not here.
Rogen had that guy on the COVID guy, and he made a lot of good points about like...
Dr. Peter McCullough.
Whatever.
And he made some good points.
Who cares?
Again, what do we cite?
We're going to citations.
We're going to do sources now.
Dr. Peter.
Yeah, whatever.
He had that guy on.
And he's talking about early treatment protocol, which, by the way, I'm all for, right?
Like, it's weird how they've demonized every, you know, if somebody goes, hey, I took hydroxychloroquine or ivermectin and it worked.
People go, no, it didn't.
You go, wait a minute.
What?
These are the same people that tells you you have to honor everybody's lived experience if they identify as another gender throughout the day several times because they're gender fluid.
So you have to honor that.
I'm a man at breakfast and a woman at lunch.
But if you take ivermectin and it worked and you say that, all of a sudden your lived experience doesn't mean a whole bunch of shit.
And you should shut the fuck up.
So it is weird.
That being said, most people, you can't get on an early COVID regimen because a lot of people do not have health care.
They do not have a doctor.
They do not have a regular doctor that they know and trust.
They do not go to the doctor or hospital because they're afraid of how much it will cost them.
They also can't take time off at work because all of these companies like Walmart and Kellogg's, all the corporations that conservatives love, they hate Pfizer and Moderna, but they think it's great that Walmart pays people in Pop-Tarts and they don't say peep about Kellogg's firing all those people who went on strike just so they could see their kids at Thanksgiving.
They say, yeah, fuck that shit.
Keep making fruit loops or die.
Okay.
So all of these corporations, by the way, seemingly have an agenda that's not exactly pro-worker.
And nobody cares unless it's Pfizer and Moderna.
And nobody's like, hey, maybe multinational conglomerates, they're in bed with the government.
Truly the most powerful entities to have ever existed in human history should not, including tech, everything, all of these conglomerates should probably not run roughshot over everybody's rights.
And people should have some dignity and a standard of living in health care.
But as soon as you bring that up, people are like, shut the fuck up.
I'm like, yeah, early COVID protocol would be great if people went to the doctor when they were sick instead of showing up to work because they will be fired if they take a day off.
And they're scared of how much it's going to cost them.
That doesn't mean that there's not some nefarious profit scheme on the side of Pfizer, but it's a systemic issue here.
It's a little bigger than just saying like, oh, yeah, well, people should get on these things earlier.
Sure.
Yes, people should be less fat.
Totally agree.
Let's go back to corporations again.
The ones whose cocks you have jammed in your throat.
Who's making everyone fat?
Where's all this food coming from?
Is it falling out of the fucking sky?
No.
It's corporations poisoning you.
Why not regulate them?
What the fuck?
The government sucks, man.
Why not regulate the amount of plastic they can put in ranch dressing?
Because maybe a mother of three whose husband dropped dead of COVID doesn't have time to read every fucking salad dressing or fucking cereal box in the grocery store because she's a little stressed.
So perhaps there should be some regulations.
Like Europe, they don't allow this shit.
You can't just put poison in everything like you do in America.
These obese people, they're all fat.
Yes, you go to certain parts of the country, there are food deserts, meaning there's nowhere to eat except fast food.
And the markets, the food is bad.
The produce is brown.
They don't get anything good.
It's true.
And it's so expensive now because of inflation.
If you have a family of four or five fucking people, you just can't make everyone a Waldorf salad.
Like you have to just buy taco meat and feed it to the kids like dogs in a kennel.
No, inflation doesn't matter.
So this, everyone's on their moral high horse about fat pit, fat people for ruin everything.
Fat people are largely the result of a few different things.
But one of them is that society does not do a great job promoting health because they allow, oh, by the way, all this body positivity shit, it's all the sugar industry.
They're dumping money.
They're putting 600 pound people on the cover of magazines and saying, yes, bitch.
And the reason they're doing that is because they don't want anybody to think twice about having their, you know, fifth McGriddle of the day.
So you have all of these trends that are converging.
But this idea that like corporations are great, except the two that make a vaccine is a little wild.
So but you can't even get into it.
So I'm going to Miami to play his steel drums.
I don't care.
I don't give a fuck.
I've made enough money.
It's like, hey, I'm fat, but I don't, you don't pay for me being fat.
That's the other thing.
You don't pay for me being fat.
I pay for you and your children and all your shit.
I don't need, I mean, listen, you used to pay for me being fat, but now you don't.
Fat millionaires are not the problem.
Me and Lizzo are not doing this to you.
Whatever your life is, whatever problem you have in your life, it's not me.
It's not Lizzo.
Fat poor people, well, this is another, that's another thing.
They are perhaps draining you.
But you're draining them.
That's the thing.
America, if you're not fat, how many healthy people do you really know?
10?
The vast majority of people in this country are pillheads, drunks, fat people, sexual degenerates, dark web pedophiles.
Truly, I mean, let's just go through the different archetypes of people.
You're a pillhead, junkie, stoner, dark web pedophile, fat person.
I mean, health is not exactly promoted here.
This isn't like an outdoorsy culture, by the way.
Oh, there's too many fat people.
Well, here comes the metaverse.
That'll slim everyone down.
I mean, it's not a healthy country.
You know, you can wield the baton against fat people all you want, but then look at how many drunks are in this country.
How many car accidents?
How many problems we have with like fucking prescription drugs and opioids and all these.
There's so many fucking problems in this country.
But it's easy to beat up on fatty.
And fatties sometimes should be beaten up on because they do fat things consistently.
But also when you go to these food deserts, when you go to these places where families literally don't have a choice but to feed their kids dirt, what do you expect them to do?
You know, you think there's a Whole Foods?
You know, we were in upstate New York.
We walked into the grocery store.
Everything was frozen.
Everything was preservative-laden, frozen food that you would defrost.
Listen, before I had a little bit of money, I was broke.
Legit broke.
Okay?
And I mean, you cannot, it's not easy to eat healthy with no money.
It really isn't.
Now, there are people that are fighting with me now or getting mad at me, but it's not, especially if you're tired and you've worked your ass off and you just want to eat something and fall asleep.
It is not easy to clip coupons or go to the market or take advantage of every sale.
Now, especially if you have a family, it's just not easy.
Doesn't mean that it's always justifiable to get in a fucking bathtub of Hagen-Das, but I'm saying that it's a little more complicated than just going, hey, we need less fat people.
Well, then you need more government regulations, those things you fucking hate.
Government regulate.
Because Pizza Hut is going to Pizza Hut.
Unless you tell them, stop making poison.
If you do not tell them to stop making poison, they will keep making, because they don't fucking eat it.
The CEOs of these companies, watch Undercover Boss.
They don't even know.
The CEO Pope always walks in.
He's like, what is this?
Wait, where's the fryer?
This is what we serve people.
Undercover boss stopped even letting the CEOs in the episodes.
They would bring on like the CFO because the CEO was so horrified that people were eating the shit.
They don't even know.
The CEOs of these companies don't even know what they serve to people.
And when they would go on Undercover Boss and they would walk in and they would see these people with face tattoos and, you know, multiple, you know, like, you know, stints in prison and everything.
And they were the employees and they'd be a little uncomfortable and they're like, okay.
And then they would look around at the food and they would go, oh, this is what we're doing.
And like, you know, obviously, you know how horrified, you know how these CEOs live.
You know where they go out to eat.
You know the types of people.
It's very different than when they get thrust into that environment and they go to a checker's.
There was this one where this woman in checkers was like, I've worked here 20 years.
This has changed my life.
It was one of the saddest.
Try to see if you can find undercover boss checkers or rallies, whatever, either one.
This woman, it was so sad.
She was like telling the CEO.
So the CEOs just, they couldn't even do it.
They were like, we don't even want to do this.
It's a bad PR look for us.
Throw a CFO in.
And by the way, I don't even know if it was a CFO.
I think there was an actor they put in because there was a few early undercover bosses where the CEO was clearly horrified at what was going on at the company.
They didn't even know.
They were like, this is the food we serve?
What?
So if you don't regulate that shit somehow, it's not going to fucking work.
Truly.
I'm finding like compilation.
Oh, here, I think I found it on Daily Motion.
It's a 51-minute episode.
Do you remember what part it was on?
We're just going to play the full 51, folks, and I'm going to go out.
I mean, do you care anymore?
Can't I just play a 51-minute episode of what?
Can you show me some of it?
Yeah, yeah, here.
I mean, this is like, you want to talk about the worst producer in the entire world.
So here we go.
This is the CEO of what?
Checkers?
Yeah, it says this is the episode, season three, episode four, checkers and rallies.
Yeah, checkers and rallies.
So you have the CEO of Checkers and Rallies who is, let's just say, a dark web pedophile.
I don't know that.
He does look it.
He looks it, and let's just, because we're not going to use his name, let's just say that and throw that out there.
It may not be true, but I think chances are it is.
By working on the front lines, he'll see what it really takes to make food fast.
You can't keep those people on hold for that long.
Hey, wait until he is.
Mark, I don't even find chicken five boxes.
I am dying.
And for the first time ever, a boss will be forced to do something so drastic right here, right now, shut the restaurant down.
Its company will never be the same.
I just want to work.
I just need a job.
So the guy's got to shut the restaurant down, by the way, because like he gets there and he sees what's going on.
He looked horrified.
Which is people are being poisoned and they're being served food that they like find on the floor and everything.
So the guy has to just shut it down.
This is when, by the way, they had to like stop doing undercover boss because they're like, literally every episode would be the guy just shutting the restaurant down.
Undercover boss would literally be the CEO going into the restaurant, calling the cops and shutting the restaurant down.
Like he'd have to call the health department on himself.
So they really had to like kind of like take a lot more care as to how they did this show because they were like, oh, this is the logical conclusion of any undercover boss would just be the CEO going, I can't in good conscience continue to allow this facility to operate.
By the way, don't even call them restaurants.
It's a facility.
RB's is a facility.
It's not a restaurant.
So now find the old woman at the end, the old white lady, and we can, we'll edit this so it's quicker.
Yeah, so I don't know if we can find the exact part I want.
It might be another episode, but we're going to really try.
But this is another one of my favorite things from this episode where this guy is clearly trying to fuck this woman who he then says he's going to mentor her, which is the creepiest thing in the world.
Winning Money on the App00:08:26
Imagine if the CEO of a company said to a fry cook, I'm going to mentor you.
What do you think that mentorship entails?
He goes, yeah, I'm going to mentor you.
I'm going to pull up in the parking lot every Thursday.
You come out, you get my dick wet, and then you go back in there and make chicken nuggets for people.
Listen to how creepy this guy is.
There's a lot of people like you that can do a lot more, right?
We're going to put a program together so that every district manager is going to be a mentor.
But I also want to make sure that you're the first mentee in that program, and your mentor is going to be me.
Really?
You're going to mentor me into being a good manager.
Yes.
Wow.
What I want to do right now is I'm going to promote you into a management and training position.
So you're going to make more compensation than you're making now.
It's a 25% promotion.
Get in my car.
Get in my car.
Get in the front seat of my car.
There's a new program.
We're going to give you 20%, 25% promotion.
So what do you make now?
$200 a week?
Well, that's going up by 25%.
Now, I want you to get in my car because the mentorship is about to begin.
The mentorship is about to begin.
I'm the CEO of a company and you're a fry cook.
I have a lot of wisdom to impart to you about what you can do to one day become the CEO.
But first, get in my car and we're going to start the training.
There's a woman.
I mean, we got to research this, but there's a woman.
Was it Checkers?
It may have been a different restaurant.
Yeah.
Fuck.
All right, hold on.
Well, we just lost like three hours of our day at Undercover Boss because it is maybe the greatest show I ever made, and it reveals what a disgusting and amoral country that we are.
But I mean, it was, we looked for that one woman, but we couldn't find her.
I used to have a bit about Undercover Boss in my act.
It was, if you just need to binge something, go and watch Undercover Boss.
And, you know, it's a real education.
The Versus game is a lot of fun.
I'm having a lot of fun with this.
We are posting questions.
Here's what the Versus app is: a lot of people love to try their hand at chance, right?
They love to try their hand at predicting the future, seeing what may or may not happen, right?
And playing your buddies while doing that.
Playing your friends, crafting questions, coming up with cool things and saying, hey, will Tim Dylan do a podcast with Kyle Rittenhouse before December 15th, right?
That question is going to be closed tomorrow.
Interesting.
There's lots of different questions that I'm going to ask that you can log into Versus app and bet I'm very good at predicting the future.
And many people who listen to the podcast know that.
And the CEO of Versus app said to me, We're so impressed by how correct you've been about literally everything you've said.
We want you to start posing questions on the app and seeing if people, if you're right or not.
And by the way, people can win money.
Yeah.
They can win money.
So that is in and of itself a fascinating thing that you can do.
You can win money by being correct about things.
A lot of people think they know what's going to happen in the world.
Well, if you really do put that to the test, what are some of the questions that you've posted, Ben?
Because I know that they've done well.
Ben has posted something.
So mine is Ben Avery.
I'm a verified user on the app.
Shut up.
I asked, will Hasbullah be declared an enemy to the state of Dagestan?
Interesting.
I posted, will Kyle Rittenhouse upload a photo to social media with him holding a gun by next week?
Oh, during the trials, we did some of those.
I mean, you can do a wide array of things on the app.
We've been having a lot of fun on that.
My question is: my new question I'm going to post: will Hezbollah and Abdu-Rozik actually have this fight?
Oh, interesting.
Is this a real fight or is this a troll?
Ooh, you think they'll do it by the new year?
Will Hasbullah and Abdu-Rozik, by the new year, have this fight?
Or is this a troll?
Will these two little Dagestani dwarfs fight each other or not?
Will this is another one?
Okay.
Okay.
Will the city of Austin be attacked by terrorists by the new year?
Hey, I'm saying it won't.
Prove me wrong and earn money.
So you mean a domestic terrorist?
Prove me wrong and earn money.
All right.
Hey, I'm saying, will a bunch of people with AK-47s just open fire on in downtown Austin?
I'm saying it won't happen.
But do you want to prove me wrong and win money versus app versus app, baby?
What else?
Will the Island Boys overdose by Christmas?
How about that?
That's too dark.
Too dark.
I don't want you doing those dark ones.
I haven't done any of that dark.
I'm trying to think.
That's not right.
It's more on brand for you, I think.
What have they done to us, the Island Boys?
Provide us beautiful music.
But they sold their soul to the devil.
Well, he said that, but I respect him for being honest about it.
How many people have done that that don't tell you they've sold their soul?
That's true.
Your name is at Tim Dylan on there without the J.
Yeah, thank you for following me.
What else here?
Will Spotify censor Joe Rogan's latest episode?
Oh, with Peter McCullough.
Dr. Peter McCullough.
Posting that question immediately, or Ben will do it for me or get fired.
That's a good one.
That's a great one.
Yeah.
Will Jesus come back from the dead by New Year's and smite his enemies, destroy the world, and bring all of his fans and followers to heaven?
I guess you would call them fans and followers.
Okay.
Like the rap.
You're talking about the rapture.
Yes, will the rapture happen?
That's a simpler way to say it.
But I think more, more, I like the Rogan one, the Rogan McCullough one, because that is interesting.
I'm going to say they will not, but a lot of people are saying they might.
Okay.
A lot of people do questions about Pete Davidson on the app.
Can you think of any Pete Davidson or Kim K questions?
Not even one can I think of.
Okay.
There's not one thing I care to ask.
What?
I mean, I don't even know what people are asking.
I have no way.
The guy's doing well.
Yeah.
I mean, what could you even possibly ask?
Will Hazbullah Shaba-bomb himself and kill Katy Perry?
He threatened a woman on Instagram.
He threatened her life.
Really?
Yeah.
What did she do?
She posted pictures of his sister, I believe, and he just went ape on her on live and said he was going to send people to her house and stuff.
I love him so much.
He's such a gangster.
It's his sister, you know, it's family.
Yeah.
It was his mother posting the photo.
He's like, I'll kill you.
Mainstream Narrative of Mental Illness00:15:26
I read an article in the Wall Street Journal about millennials are now supercharging the housing market.
Young people that hated owning things are now driving like half the transactions in the market now.
People are now warming to the idea of owning a home in a suburb, probably, that just a few years ago were in love with the cities.
I wonder what happened.
But yeah, it seems like after the COVID and the riots and the, you know, because things are getting worse in cities, and maybe it's overstated to a degree, but really a lot of it is, you know, you hear from people things are not good and you see it with your own eyes.
And then there are people that will accuse anyone that talks about crime like, oh, you're a fucking that's some boomer Fox News shit that you're just, you know, bringing up that some dude climbed over the fucking fence and scared your wife.
So what?
And, but people are really, people are really like, you know, there's mentally ill people on the street.
Many of them have weapons.
Many of them are unhappy.
They're not well.
And they may or may not attack you.
And this is becoming less and less fun.
It's not as fun as it used to be because there were fewer of them.
You shouldn't have none.
You need a few, a sprinkling, if you will.
But when you have too many, somebody getting slashed isn't even a novelty anymore.
It becomes, you know, routine.
And I think that people are getting a little wary of that type of living environment.
Doesn't mean that those conditions will continue, although they probably will.
But this idea that anyone concerned about safety, especially if you have a family, anyone concerned about their physical safety is like ridiculous.
They're ridiculous.
It's usually put out there by people who are doing very well and not in a position to worry and maybe don't have kids, don't have a family, you know, and aren't really worried about those things.
But you hear these stories about, you know, and I think there's a lot of problems.
It's not, obviously, we've had a very strange 12-month period, and even longer than 12-month period in America, where people Are.
It's becoming more and more obvious that people cannot have logical discussions with each other about certain topics because they are so emotionally charged that people don't really care about facts or data or statistics.
They're more concerned with saying the right thing or they're being very careful about conversations.
But one of those conversations is about crime that's going up in a lot of these cities.
And a lot of vulnerable people, poor people, old people, women, people that rely on public transportation, people that work late hours, people that, you know, people that don't live in the suburbs, don't live in gated communities, aren't millionaires.
A lot of those people bear the brunt of that spike in crime.
And a lot of this coincided with this idea that if you got rid of funding for police and then reallocated it to community reinvestment or education or mental health, all of those things are worthwhile things.
But if you had less police and less funding for police and you were able to take this money and give it to these other things, perhaps that'd be a long-term benefit.
I don't really know.
But in a short term, it's been a problem.
If you look at facts, if you care about any, you know, any type of.
Sullivan shared the statistic the other day.
I'm sure you saw it.
If the U.S. still hospitalized its mentally ill at the same rate as it did in 55, its mental health institutions would house almost 1.1 million people any given day.
And instead, they house fewer than 50,000 patients now.
I know seven people that I could name that are friends of mine that should be institutionalized.
And they're dead serious.
Like seven or eight people that I know that should not have the ability to plan their own day.
They should have to, they should be constrained by a facility.
No, listen, it's a problem.
You know, and that doesn't mean you can give cops a blank check to do whatever the fuck they want.
But like, very honestly, people in LA, people are talking about the fact that they feel less safe at, yeah, not 40-year-old open mic stand-up comedians who live on floors and don't have any money or families and are on Twitter just, you know, trying to tweet their way to a sandwich because they're broke.
They're not talking about it.
But people with like skin in the game are discussing it of varying political affiliations.
Left-wing people, right-wing people, people going, yeah, things aren't good.
And I don't really know what the answer is because my mother's mentally ill.
And I have a lot of, I have a feeling that, you know, it's not enough to like, you have to figure out a way to identify people that have these problems and get them care, get them some type of help, get them off the street, you know, get them off drugs,
have them not be able to get a hold of knives and guns and, you know, things that can ruin the day.
It's not easy.
You're dealing with a men, and more and more people are going crazy every day.
More and more people are losing their minds.
So we've just got a bad situation where the culture pushes more and more people off the cliff.
And then those people then turn around and start committing acts of violence because they are insane.
A culture of horrible food, prescription drugs, an over-medicated and under-medicated, both culture of people that are self-medicating, a culture of high levels of stress, work till you drop dead, no health care, no intervention, early intervention when people are having these mental health problems, a culture that prides itself on like,
hustle and grind and fucking figure it out, man.
You just got to tough your way through it.
It pushes people off a cliff.
And then those people are going to end up in American cities insane and they're going to kill you.
Perhaps that should make you think twice about what we've set up here.
A system that is designed so that a fair amount of people every year are going to become homeless.
They're going to lose benefits.
And whatever mental health issue they have is going to be exacerbated by poverty.
Those people are going to end up in very desperate situations.
Some of them, not all of them, some of them are going to lose their minds and they're going to strike out and do.
And you're going to see more and more acts of domestic terrorism.
You know, you'll see these people who are desperate.
They have nothing to lose.
They're going to pick up arms.
I mean, and I don't know if, you know, I don't know what this had to do with because there was a legendary Mexican guy that died at the Hollywood Walk of Fame and a guy just started shooting out of his window.
We had the Waukesha massacre where that SUV that was not being driven, it was a self-driving SUV killed all those people.
But no, it was a black guy that was steeped in anti-white kind of racist language, right?
Yeah, it's not the mainstream narrative, really.
No, the mainstream narrative is a car decided to mow over children in Wisconsin.
But there was a guy who was like very, from what I know, seemed to be, you know, a radical.
And the ideology that radicalized him was an ideology that was kind of like, hey, it was dehumanizing to like white people.
Right.
Like white people are all out to get you trying to kill you evil.
And well, if you say that about any group of people and somebody believes it, they're going to do horrible things like drive a car through a parade.
Now, it is not popular with the media because the media likes to play footsie every now and then with that ideology as well.
Because it's fun.
It revs everyone up.
It gets some clicks.
Just like they did after 9-11, where it was Muslims that they were talking about.
And, you know, they would have all these pieces about Islam and this and that.
And, you know, there were radicals that were white people that would then go and commit acts.
Not a ton of them.
But there was a few people that would then commit like anti-Muslim hate crimes, anti-Chinese hate crimes, whatever.
Why wouldn't you have an anti-white hate crime, right?
Like, why wouldn't you have that if the person is being motivated by that?
The idea, I guess, is that the media doesn't think that's real or maybe doesn't think that they've ever stoked that type of feeling ever.
Or maybe they don't think that it's a widespread enough, which I don't think it's widespread.
I don't think it's an epidemic.
Right.
But I don't think hate crimes against anyone are an epidemic when you look at the numbers.
They're just not happening in mass.
They're just not.
But this guy.
It showed he had praised Hitler, backed Black Lives Matter, and called for violence against white people.
So the mainstream narrative, they don't want to discredit, you know, BLM and stuff like that.
So they kind of just, it feels like they kind of just back off of it a little bit.
It's very hard for the alt, right?
Because he's like, fuck white people.
And then he praises Hitler and they're like, well, well, this is tough.
This is tough.
But you're going to see that more and more, right?
Because people are mentally ill.
Yeah.
They're being let out on bail.
These bail rules are interesting.
And, you know, I don't think people like Khalif Browder, who can't make bail, should die in Rikers Island because he stole a backpack.
But, you know, what did this guy do?
He tried to murder his wife.
He ran over his ex-wife previously.
And then how long...
He's also a pedophile.
And then he was out of jail when?
In a few days?
Yeah, a cash bail of $1,000.
That might be a little light for running over the wife.
He had allegedly punched the mother of his child in the face early last month and then drove over her, leaving tire marks on her leg.
$1,000 for driving over a woman seems light, to be honest.
Just from a purely financial standpoint.
A G. Like you ran over one.
Listen, punching her in the face all day, that's a G. That's a G. Punch her in the face.
You're out with a G. I'm for that.
She's popping off.
You're popping off.
Things get heavy.
One pop.
You don't break her nose.
You don't do anything like that.
You hit her once, again.
I am not for that, but I understand $1,000 a G. Hey.
But if you run her over with a car, that has to be at least $3,000, right?
If you run over the mother of your child with a car, you should have to pay at least $3,000 to get out of jail and do it again.
If you really want to run over the woman, the mother of your child again with a car, it should cost you $3,000 at minimum.
And the problem with not paying these low bail numbers is that people get out and they do it again.
And this guy, this demon, went and killed a bunch of people in Wisconsin.
And people will listen to this, they'll go, no, well, the bail system's unfair.
It may be unfair.
It's also unfair to be walking in a Christmas parade and get slaughtered by a maniac in his car.
That is also unfair.
So in between those two extremes, you'd want to create a system that makes it harder for a violent psychopath to go back out and do the thing he just did it.
He just ran over somebody with a car.
Bail System and Violent Psychopaths00:02:23
Five days previous.
Five days ago.
No, you don't understand.
Again, are these political, am I having political, is this a political ideology I'm espousing?
I'm just talking like a human being would talk.
And you people impose your politics on it because you're insane.
But I'm having a discussion like I would talk to anybody going, yeah, I get it.
People getting thrown in debtor's prison or whatever, the equivalent of that over parking tickets is fucking absurd.
That's no good.
Guy who runs over a woman with his car, being let out immediately on a bail of a G, goes and does, commits an act of terrorism a week later, that's a problem.
Figure that out.
It's not political.
I don't think the idea that you don't want people climbing in your house to kill you is a political statement.
If you say I'm against people climbing over my fence and breaking into my house to kill me, I don't go, oh yeah, you must be a right-wing nut.
That's not political to me.
Those are not political statements.
You know?
I'd rather my family not get murdered.
I don't turn around and go, must be a libertarian.
I just go, oh, it's a father or a mother who doesn't want their family to experience a home invasion.
And this is why the Democrats are going to lose again because the idea that this shit is in any way political and isn't just rational is crazy.
It's not political to want to preserve the safety of yourself and the people you care about to the extent that you can.
It's not political.
You know, it's just what it is.
Crushing Larynxes of Gen Z00:02:53
That's why I'm excited about violence in only one city.
And I'm going to, guess which one?
It's the one that I'm in right now.
Because it is a violent city.
It is a violent hellscape.
Other than the fact that it's completely devoid of culture, interesting people.
The only interesting people here are psychopaths, many of them billionaires.
But it's also a city that is very violent.
And people get shot, stabbed.
It is a dirty, filthy bloodbath, or as Chris Hedges would say, a bacchanal.
He loves that word.
The American bacadal.
It means like an orgy party.
Yes.
Something in that vein.
Yeah.
I want you to go watch 20 somethings Austin.
By the way, to say that we have raised the least interesting, least capable, most basic generation of human beings to have ever.
I'm more excited about the Zoomers, the ones that are even younger, the ones that are nihilists.
Ramboo.
Yeah, get kids from Rambu.
I read an article about the Minecraft kids.
And who is it?
There's like, there's Dream.
He's a mystery.
Nobody knows who he is.
He's got a mask, and he's the biggest Minecraft YouTuber on earth.
And then he's got a collection of friends that are all like multi-millionaires.
And they all have millions of followers.
And one of them's name is Ranbu, Ranbu.
And he wears a mask.
And it's kind of hilarious.
And another one's name is Tubbo, but he's not that fat.
He's British.
British.
And they just play Minecraft all day.
And the kids give the money.
And good for them.
Hey, get it while you can.
Good for them.
I have more faith in that generation than whatever the hell.
And I don't know if it's technically a different generation, but like the 20-somethings Austin, I mean, these motherfuckers, it is just grotesque.
One guy, the stand-up comic who's not a comedian in any discernible way, he's not.
And he says to this girl that went to Berkeley, he goes, oh, they're on a date.
He goes, oh, so you went to Berkeley, so you're a lot smarter than me.
And she goes, yes, yes, I am.
At that point, I would have grabbed her by the throat.
I would have grabbed her by the throat.
Okay?
Truly.
I would have grabbed her by the throat.
And I would have said, listen to me, you cunt.
I could crush your larynx right now.
Barton Springs and Grotesque Dating00:03:51
Do you understand me?
I'd look her right in the eyes.
I could crush your fucking larynx right now.
Who's smart now?
It's a good show.
If you watch it, as I have.
Now, before we leave here, and we will never really speak of this place again once we are done.
Because I know people are probably sick of it already.
I'm sick of it, and I'm here.
Do you want to say anything nice about the Austin that you remember?
The Richard Linkletter films, the Alamo Draft House, the pork ribs.
Yeah, Barton Springs used to be awesome.
Do you mean back when it was before people moved here?
Yeah.
Back when like, I don't know, Nick Mullen lived here and liked it, right?
Or did he like it?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I think he did.
He probably did, right?
He said to me years ago, it sucks.
And I didn't realize how right he was, but he's right.
Yeah, back in the day, you go to Barton Springs, there's no line.
You go to Hutz Hamburgers, which is now like a new Italian place.
Like all those old spots are just gone and people can't afford it anymore.
And you've noticed this as well.
It's as expensive as L.A. to live out here.
So it's just, it's all.
It's expensive to live here.
I mean, how long were we in traffic today?
Just trying to go through it.
Yeah, you know, you did it.
You've created what you want.
You want hell?
You got it.
You know?
But again, this idea of this city is being put out there.
It's being put forth by a guy with like a trillion dollars telling everyone how good it is, that he loves it.
Well, maybe his experience here is different than yours.
Is that possible?
Is it possible that the guy with his own spaceship may be experiencing this place differently than you are?
Maybe.
But the people that move here deserve it.
It's not like a rare blood disease.
This is something you choose and you deserve.
And if you come here, no matter what happens, you get shot, you get stabbed, you work, you flounder as a barista and strum a guitar in some modern-looking barn they've put up.
All these new houses look like modern barns, okay?
And they should do in them what they used to do in old barns, which is just club dead animals.
You know, animals that were dying.
There was no more use for.
My point is.
My point is, if you, this dog sucks, stop.
Why does it breathe like this?
She just licks too much of her hair and then coughs it up like a cat.
Why does she do it?
She's just a very nervous, neurotic animal.
She needs to be in a field.
That's the title of the episode, Nervous Neurotic Animal.
Because she's not the only nervous, neurotic animal in this zip code.
She was better in L.A. You brought her here.
Now she's trying to be cool and hip.
She's trying to fucking read books that she thinks will make her sound cool.
She's trying to order things like, you know, like different types of, you know, drinks from her favorite mixologist.
It's a grotesquery.
But it's really one of our last episodes.
We have a few more episodes from here.
Final Episodes Before New Year00:02:11
We're going to try.
We're not going to be back in the studio until January.
People have to know that.
They have to understand that.
They have to process that in their fucking head.
You're not going to see me until January, but then you're going to see us in a brand new studio.
How about that?
Unless the Minecraft kids come and save us.
Let's go work for them.
Let's just go work for them.
I'd work for Tubbo.
Tubbo, Rambo, Rambo.
Dude, what if you left this podcast to go work for Rambo?
Just a British psychopath wearing a mask?
Yeah, what if you just call, well, I think he has a thing, he whatever, has a problem with his own face.
Oh, I feel bad now.
Well, it looks fine, but he doesn't think it does.
I don't know.
It was in the article or whatever.
The point is, I just think if you came to me and you went, listen, I've been thinking I really enjoyed what we've built and the time we've spent together, but I'm going to work for someone else.
And I'm like, who?
And you're like, Ramboo.
And I'm like, the child Minecraft streamer?
You're like, yes.
I'm like, okay.
You win some, you lose some.
TimDillacomedy.com.
We've only got a few more dates left.
Sacramento, late show, grab tickets to that.
San Francisco, a few tickets left.
Garden City, Idaho, canceled the late show.
Nobody bought tickets.
Sorry about that.
There is standing room at the first show.
We'll be able to get everybody in.
You know, who knew I didn't have 20,000 fans in Boise, Idaho?
Who knew?
Yeah.
You know, my big markets are New York and Chicago and Philly and Tampa and Dallas and Miami and places where people live.
Time Francis.
And then Toronto.
Let's not forget New Year's Eve.
Toronto's amazing.
New Year's Eve, Toronto, baby.
Grab those tickets.
TimDylanComedy.com.
We're going to go out.
And we're going to have a fun.
Do you know what we've got planned for that show?
Which show?
Toronto?
Yeah, I'm doing a full set.
Okay.
About a little under an hour.
And then Michaela Peters is coming out to kill her father on stage.