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Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Amplifying Job Losses00:14:24
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dylan show 24 hours late.
We wanted to do it from the studio for you.
It doesn't happen often.
We hope it doesn't happen again here with Ben Avery.
I want to comment on something.
We got a lot to talk about today, but I want to comment on something because I don't ever like when somebody gets fired.
I don't go in for that.
Whether they are a friend of mine or a foe.
I don't like anyone getting fired.
And no one's a foe because I don't know who anyone is.
They're just these people on the internet.
But I don't want anybody to lose their job over something that they said in the past that is they're trying to be funny and somebody got hold of it and said, you're out of here.
I don't go in for that.
But unknowingly, I probably help someone lose their job by amplifying this by retweeting something.
Ellery Smith, who I don't know, who's a comedian, apparently, who I don't know, but I mean, she is a comedy writer.
She writes on Robot Chicken.
Have you watched Robot Chicken?
Very funny show.
You like Robot Chicken.
Well, phenomenal.
Well, Ellery wrote on Robot Chicken, and then she tweeted this.
She tweeted, remember when someone had their SNL offer revoked after, and this is, by the way, this is in response to the shooting in Atlanta, which is an Asian hate crime with no evidence.
There's zero evidence to back evidence may emerge, but at this moment, there's no evidence that this guy went in intentionally targeting Asian people.
He also killed two white people.
And this is David Dobrik.
But she, in response to this Asian hate crime, which we're going to go into a little bit, and in SNL, they've Boeing Yang on there in SNL and nobody knows what's going on.
It's even the audience at SNL, like they expect it to be bad, but even they're shocked.
They're like, can't it be a little better than this?
And then you see these like sock pop or these weird accounts on Twitter.
They're like, SNL, it's the best week yet.
I'm like, who is tweeting that?
Who are these people?
So Ellery tweets after this massacre, which is tragic, insanely tragic.
She tweets, remember when somebody had their SNL offer revoked after using an anti-Asian slur and so many people thought it was an overreaction?
Like this guy.
I thought it was.
Hateful language begets violence.
Hateful jokes beget violence.
They minimize and they dehumanize and they allow for the normalization of terror.
So that's what Shane Gillis was doing when he was satirizing a developer in New York saying the C-words, we all know the slur, live in Chinatown, which is what his bit was doing.
And the bit could have been funnier.
It could have been more developed.
It was on a podcast.
He used that word.
And this tweet is basically saying he's responsible for the incel walking into the Atlanta massage parlor and blowing everybody's head off because he tried to do a joke on his podcast years ago about a racist, satirizing kind of like a racist developer in Chinatown.
The blanks live here and that's where they live and whatever, you know?
It was the greatest joke ever.
No, but that's podcasts are not always for the greatest.
You know what I mean?
There's only one podcast where it's really high-end stuff out there.
This one.
So she said that because she was probably sitting there at Robot Chicken and she was saying to herself, how can I climb the ladder a little bit more?
How can I, how do I get a little bit more clout?
And then, of course, there's a lot of people that make offensive jokes on this planet, yours truly being one of them.
I'm not responsible for people being shot.
In fact, I think taking away offensive humor could get more people shot because now nobody has any way to release any tension and they have to sit through SNL and go, and trust me, that's a lot worse.
But then everybody starts digging up the old tweets from her, homemade pad tie, didn't put my cat in it, though.
Blonde Asians, you aren't fooling anyone.
These are people with dreadlocks in my apartment.
I don't feel safe.
That's my favorite.
There are people with dreadlocks in my apartment.
I don't feel safe.
Apparently, when the professor asks you to bring an essay to next class, he doesn't mean you're landscaper.
Not bad.
Hey, not bad.
You want a writing job on this show?
Now, of course, she says, I posted a tasteless racist tweet when I was 17.
She was 19, but whatever.
It was disgusting and normalized the exact kind of violence I met.
How?
How does that normalize violence?
But whatever.
I get it.
I get it.
The cop reads that tweet, then he shoots Michael Brown.
I know how it is, except Michael Brown did charge the car, but whatever, I get it.
There are problems between the African-American community and the cops.
I get that.
It's not all this woman's fault, but I understand what she's saying.
It's a lot of her fault.
Agreed.
Luckily, I've been willing, able to grow in the past eight years.
So my problem, and I tweeted, I'm like, when you guys do something, it's always a part of your journey.
You're always willing and growing and learning and in the journey.
And the journey is my journey.
And I would be, you know, and then what Shane or me or Nick or anyone does, we are evil, irredeemable pieces of shit simply for the fact that we don't pretend to be a bad person.
Like she's pretending to be, like, she's going, I was a racist piece of shit.
Well, I wasn't.
I was making a goof.
I was making a joke.
I don't know, but that's why they get mad at us because we don't go and say, oh, my God, I can't believe it.
The fucking, I made that joke and then the riots, you know, like it's, no, that's not what happened.
I made a joke that people enjoyed.
People of that race enjoyed.
People of all kinds of vastly different socioeconomic backgrounds, racial backgrounds, religious backgrounds enjoyed because they understood that it is a joke.
They understood that it was a joke.
So I tweeted something, but I got a lot.
You know, I have a lot of followers on Twitter.
So I tweeted, I said, we don't have to find everything here, but I tweeted, I said, did the audience, trust me, I tweeted, I said, these are your heroes, the Simons guy and Ellery Smith, who thinks that it's high people eat dogs.
These are your progressive heroes.
Again, this is, and then she came out and said, well, I lost my day job because they, you know, all the tweets.
She goes, I lost my day job.
And she goes, I'm still pro-consequence culture.
This is what you don't understand, Ellery.
You're in a cult and there's only one way out.
And it's deprogramming or the way that everyone gets out of a cult, which is you drink the poison, you fly a plane into a building, you strap a suicide vest on and you walk into the discotech.
You walk into the nightclub or you get fired from your job at Robot Chicken.
It's one of the, you're going out through the shoot.
There's no other way out unless you do a massive deprogramming because everything you believe is nonsense.
And to get fired from your job and going, I'm still pro-consequence.
I still, I'm still, I will be homeless to make a point.
I will be homeless to make a point.
Thank God.
You don't think that in the back of her head, she's like, yeah, I should have just piped down.
You know, Shane got piled on.
He got death threats.
I know the guy.
The guy went through hell.
His family was getting threatened.
You don't think that's enough?
He lost the job.
You don't think that's enough?
We got to revisit it every year.
And now she can't write on Robot Chick, which I haven't watched.
And you would I like it?
Probably not.
I haven't seen it in a decade.
Wow.
Great.
So the anti-Asian hate crime, which both Shane and Ellery are responsible for, to be quite honest with you, 50, 50.
Bowen Yang, who's, I don't know him, gay comedian, another gay comedian, always nice to me, met him once, sweet-ish person, not someone I actively dislike.
And I'll be very honest, not a huge fan of the work, but I'm sure he's not a huge fan of my work.
That's okay.
That's fine.
Isn't it fine?
Is that still okay to be not a fan of the work?
Now, some of it I am a fan of.
Like they had this show called I Don't Think So Honey, where they had a show where alternative comics, lots of them gay, did a minute of material because alternative comics happen to be rich, white, a lot of times gay, and are not fans of the work.
So they got up and they did like a minute rant, which was funny.
And it was a fun show that him and Matt Rogers did.
And then they would get off the stage and that would be it.
And then they would complain that they only had three pilots or whatever that year.
But no, because there's a lot of just gay people like to party.
Why would any sober, sane human being be a stand-up comedian?
Why would a gay guy who's his entire life dealt with shit for being gay when he comes out of the clouds?
He goes, I want to make money and fucking party.
Not I want to go to shitholes across America and fucking entertain people.
I just got back from Kansas City.
And we'll go into that.
And thank you for coming out.
But what sane gate?
No, they go, I want to go to fucking Miami and do Coke and get fucked.
And are they wrong?
Are they wrong?
So there's a rare breed of us that make a career of it.
And Bowen's one of them.
And respect for that.
I don't, again, I don't know much of what's going on there.
Well, he does the anti-Asian hate crime thing on SNL.
And everybody on Twitter is like, this is the biggest thing.
There's no evidence, again, that this was an anti-Asian hate crime.
But I understand that.
And I understand that it's a tragedy.
No matter what, it affects the Asian community.
So 100%.
I'm not minimizing that at all.
The guy who did it's a scumbag.
Give him the chair.
Like, you know.
But this bit, are we allowed to play this?
I think so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think small like this is fine.
Yeah.
I mean, if we could play this, it's again, I don't, as with most things, I'm, I'm confused about the premise, the punchline.
I'm confused about it all.
So Asians are being discriminated against at Harvard and Yale, where they're not letting them in.
And I would think there'd be jokes about that here, but there aren't.
They're conspicuously left out.
But let's watch this little clip.
And again, I have nothing bad to say.
I like Colin Joast a lot.
And Bowen, I don't really know.
I just know that I'm not a, I'm not a huge fan of the takes, but I wouldn't be.
But again, I wouldn't be a fan of the takes, right?
That's not a shock to anyone, him.
That's not a shock to anyone on that show.
If they say, you know, Tim Dylan's not a fan of the takes, they go, yeah, that's the point.
We write shit that we know a guy like Tim Dylan would hate, you know?
A guy that thinks.
We don't want that because that's Nazi shit, thinking.
We like people to get whipped up into an emotional frenzy for an hour and a half on Saturday night and go, ya, ya, ya!
They don't want somebody logically going, why is this this and that, that?
But let's play this.
To condemn the rise of anti-Asian hate crime.
Here, by the way, this is the introduction to the bit.
Here to condemn the rise of anti-Asian hate crimes.
That's the opening.
Should I just start getting brought on stage as the ghost of Matthew Shepard?
Like, here to walk in the shoes of many gay men who died of AIDS before their time.
It's Tim Dylan with observations about his mother and Pizza Hut.
The piles of gay corpses were stacked up, and Tim Dylan gets to stand on all of them and deliver a comedy set for you this evening.
Like, what an interesting way to bring a comedian on a comedy show.
Here to condemn.
By the way, you want me to laugh?
And I'm not saying to do this.
Here to talk about the benefits of the rash of Asian hate crimes.
Please welcome because there aren't.
And I'm sure there is, you know, calling it the China virus didn't help.
It did come from China.
But again, you know, Trump was not about healing.
But again, so to me, I go, you want to make me laugh, you know, but let's watch more of it.
Maybe I'm wrong.
On how you can help is Asian cast member Bo Niang.
Is that my official title, Asian cast member?
That's how you told me to introduce you.
Yeah, I set your ass up.
It's good.
Hi, everyone.
So no one, again, no one's laughing and everyone in the audience is terrified.
So this is how you know a comedy show is going well.
Everyone in the audience is terrified of laughing or not laughing.
They don't know whether to laugh or not laugh.
Picture a king, a tyrannical king, sitting on a throne and his subjects there being like, are we laughing?
Are we not?
Like nobody knows what to do.
This is the show at this point.
Everybody's on the edge of a cliff, not knowing what's going to happen next because the guys brought out is to condemn the Asian hate crime.
So you go like this.
You're like, oh, is this a bit?
Then he comes out and he does a little catty fun joke.
Like, am I Asian cast member?
And they go, ha ha ha, what's about to happen now?
Like, what is about to happen now?
No one knows.
So again, this is great.
Bleak Weeks for Asians00:06:53
Things for Asians in this country have been bleak for the past two weeks and all the weeks before that since forever.
Okay, let's stop that.
Things for Asians in this country have been bleak for the last two weeks and before that forever.
Compared to what country?
What country are Asians being treated?
Was it Cultural Revolution in China?
Was it Mao?
Is it North Korea?
What country out there are Asians much happier than they are in the United States of America?
I'm just, again, educate.
I'm sure there's a few, right?
I'm sure there's a few.
But to say that things have been bleak for Asian Americans forever.
All of this truly, it's like black people can't have a day in this country.
They can't have a day in this country.
You notice that?
They really can't have a day.
Like, they cannot have a day in this country.
Everybody else just jumps on like, hey, it's been bleak for ages forever.
Among the highest incomes, highest college graduation rates, very high employment rates, thriving large communities like Chinatown and New York and San Francisco, a huge great contributor to culture, to the economic power of major cities.
What?
Again, I'm confused.
I get the last two weeks.
Going, it's been bleak for the last two weeks.
And he goes, and every day before that since forever.
And I know, yeah, but what about the trains?
What about the discrimination they faced when they were putting in the train?
You know, black people.
How about that?
That would be my argument.
Would be black people.
Again, but let's go on here.
And I found some posts online with action items everyone can take to help.
Oh, right.
So now this is when he starts to do the bit and you realize it should just be a serious talk.
Like, this is why you can't do ball.
Just do the talk.
Just tell everyone their scum and do the talk.
I'm more interested in watching that than the bit.
Watch how off the rails this goes.
There's places to donate to?
Yes.
And here are some that I found super helpful.
Six ways you can check in on your AAPI friends and tell them they're so hot.
So that's Asian American Pacific Islander.
I guess people just want to help us any way they can.
Yeah.
Here's a list of something I've seen a lot of activists post to amplify these Asian voices who want more Paneras in North Brooklyn.
Yes.
No one understands the Asian community.
By the way, to say that this is bombing is like, no one understands what any of this is.
We were just told he was coming on to denounce the Asian hate crimes.
And then he said it's been horrible for Asians forever in the country.
And now we're doing bits about Panera.
So again, the audience doesn't know what to do.
They are terrified of laughing.
They have no idea what's going on.
Communities are concerned about?
Yeah, it is for the ones in my neighborhood.
Okay, fine.
Here's something we can all do.
Call your senators and demand that they know about the lesbian characters in Sailor Moon.
Bo, no offenses, but this is actually helpful to all Asians.
Maybe.
I don't know, Colin.
Okay, maybe what can I say to help how insanely bad things are?
If someone's personality is punch an Asian grandma, it's not a dialogue.
I have an Asian grandma.
You want to punch her?
There ain't no common ground, mama.
Yeah, that's tough.
I mean, I see my friends donating and I tell them that's great, but then I also tell them do more.
Like, okay, you're ordering from Chinese restaurants.
Great.
Do more.
Let me know when you feed your white kids chicken feet.
You cry during Minari.
Congrats.
I was sobbing into my boner for Stephen Young.
Do more.
And like, why are you telling me that you tipped your manicurist well?
Let me know when you get on your knees and scrub her feet while she looks at your phone.
Do more.
You're right.
No one should do it.
So again, again.
It's it's it's it's writing a fine line.
It's not funny, but it's also not meaningful in any way.
Like I'd really much rather a true like crying, like hardfelt, like, you don't know.
I'm much, give me that.
Give me that.
Whatever this middle ground, it's like so strange.
I watched this five times trying to understand what happened.
I don't understand.
I'm like, wait a minute, what's going on?
He's like, when's the last time you fed the kid chicken feed?
Is that what we're doing?
To decrease Asian discrimination to feed people chicken feet?
I went to Noodletown in New York and there's a chicken foot in my soup and I gnawed on it.
I don't care.
I'm confused.
Is eating eclectic food, will that get me off the hook?
Will no one call me a racist anymore if I eat eclectic food?
Well, guess what?
Take me down to Chinatown and put on a bib.
You're like, I'm confused as to the and then he goes, well, you should wash your manicure's feet.
I'm like, what does this have to do with the guy who shot the sex workers because he was a fucking incel freak, weirdo demon?
I don't understand.
I'm again, I'm confused.
I know that Asians face discrimination.
I'm not a moron.
And I know that it's, there's been an uptick since Trump, but it's this idea that it's this rash, it's a rash of Asian hate crimes that are happening all the time.
And it's bleak and horrible.
It's like, is it good to tell people that they're living in a country that hates them, which we don't?
I don't believe we've seen no evidence of that.
Is it good to make people paranoid and depressed and anxious that they're going to be the victim of a hate crime when it's statistically completely incredibly unlikely that they'll be a victim of any type of hate crime in their life, let alone a racially motivated hate crime?
If they're an Asian, is it a good idea to terrify people and make them more anxious and more depressed with all the other problems they have?
Is it good to lay on these things?
Is it good to layer this stuff?
I don't know.
I don't feel like that's healthy.
Would I tell a young gay kid, oh, you're going to have trouble in this country?
Satanic Shoes and Progressives00:09:38
I wouldn't do that.
I wouldn't do that.
I would say be smart, be kind, be thoughtful, be strong, get over the fact that people aren't going to like you or that people are going to say bad things about you.
But I wouldn't try to paint this idea that it's like you're living in the worst, bleak time and you'll never be able to transcend any of this.
I don't get it.
And you're not conjugate.
Sweet guy.
And he's just sitting there like, hey, man, I fucked Scarlett Johansson.
I got a lot of money.
What do you want me to do?
You know what I mean?
That's kind of the face he's making.
By the way, this is the face he's making.
They originally had Scarlett Johansson playing Bowen Yang delivering this speech.
And they had to step in and say, let's give it to Bowen.
Let's just finish this.
We're almost over.
Okay.
You should, specifically.
I can't address any of this without bringing up class or gender or imperialism.
I don't even want to be doing this.
Huh?
Can't you?
You can't address this without bringing up imperialism and gender?
There's got to be a way to do that.
In a three-minute comedy sketch, there's got to be a way to do it without bringing up imperialism and gender.
I have to believe there is.
Keep going.
This update piece.
I wanted to do my character gay Passover, bunny.
This is too smart for the show.
This is too smart.
It was 20 minutes long.
This is what happens when you let college theater majors into entertainment or high school theater kids into entertainment, people who are emotionally unprepared for the rigors of a business that is highly competitive.
And what then happens is, because they are smart, ambitious people, many of them have to figure out other ways to get ahead.
And a lot of that is leaning on identity and going, well, wait a minute.
If you don't give me this opportunity, you are a, you are an iss, a racist, a sexist, a homophobe.
And, and I like, he's not a bad dude from what I can tell, but he's not ready to be on this show, truly.
Um, and that's really glaringly obvious to everyone who's seen him in any sketch.
And it's crazy they didn't have an Asian before him.
That is insane.
And I don't know why that is.
That is crazy to me that they didn't have a black woman.
Like they had Ellen Cleghorn.
It's like the diversity blind spots are weird on this show, but it's all Ivy League guys that look like Colin Joes, right?
But I mean, and I'm not saying that the guy doesn't have talent.
I guess he is ready to be on the version of the show that they put out now.
But this idea that like SNL is supposed to be the great sketch comics in America or the next generation of comedy all-star.
Am I crazy to think that this is not it?
That this is truly not it?
Eddie Murphy and now we're here.
And I'm not, and again, it's not a knock on anyone.
It just feels like when you sit down and go, I can't do this without bringing up imperialism.
I mean, that shit, that's like a college.
Like, what are you talking about?
You're there to kill and be funny and get your points across about those things through humor.
Write a fucking joke about imperialism.
Don't say I have to should be speaking about imperialism.
Then do it.
Make it funny and do it.
It can be done.
Like it's just like a very weird to just give a laundry list of things you should be talking about, but you didn't because you chose to make a joke about Sailor Moon.
You chose to make a joke about being a gay Passover bunny.
I'd want to hear about imperialism.
Write about that.
Let's just finish this up.
This is not an attack on anyone.
Again, I'm just confused.
Look, I'm just a comedian.
I don't have the answers, but I'm not just looking for them online.
I'm looking around me.
The GoFundMe for Siao Gencia, the grandmother who fought back against her attacker, raised $900,000, which she immediately gave back to the community.
That's where we are as Asians.
Now come meet us there.
Wait a minute.
That's where we are.
That's where we are.
That's what one amazing woman did.
That's a crazy.
That's where we are.
It's very interesting.
I love people that just collective is everything they're about.
I would never in my life say that.
I would never in my life claim to be as brave as like a gay guy who was like getting beaten at Stonewall.
I'd be like, that's where we are getting beaten at Stonewall because we're fags and no one will accept us.
That's where we are as gays.
It's like, no, I'm by a pool in Florida complaining about chicken wings.
What are you talking about?
You don't get to be always a revolutionary.
I don't know what to tell.
I mean, that's an amazing woman.
God bless her.
And like, I mean, you know, God bless her family and everything, but it's just strange.
Let's kill this.
We don't need to finish this.
Again, I was just, I'm genuinely confused about it.
I'm sure someone will educate me who's smarter than me.
I get it.
You know, I mean, I'm not trying to, you know, make myself out to, I was made fun of as a kid for being gay because I was in plays.
I was in theater.
I was effeminate.
I was more effeminate than I am now.
And although I am more of a cunt now than I was then, which is interesting, as I've gotten more masculine, I've become more of a cunt, which is interesting.
Many men have feminine qualities, by the way, that are like destroying society, but and it has nothing to do with sexuality.
Most straight men I know are useless.
They cry.
They barely work.
They are, they live off women.
I mean, a lot of them are just, you know, lost in a haze of porn.
Also, can I ask this question, which I asked on Twitter, and I believe this.
Is there a happy medium?
Is there a space for people that are like, hey, man, the neighbors are gay.
How cool is that?
Neighbors are gay.
No problem with gay people.
But I would prefer if my children did not twerk on Satan.
Is there a way to create a space where we can respect gay people without exposing my children to a man twerking on an image of Satan?
Is there a happy medium for those people?
Because I get it.
I get it that the Christians go wild with this stuff and it's a great distraction.
But to all my friends out there that are constantly defending anything.
And again, this is all like, I've never heard the song.
I imagine the song's not great.
So what you have to do, of course, is twerk on Satan.
Now you have a Satan shoe with pentagrams.
But it is a lot.
Like, you know, the idea of a kid coming home and going, oh, I have Satan shoes with pentagrams on them.
It's a lot.
So the idea that that's not a lot, by the way.
How about MAGA shoes?
How about Donald Trump?
How about like a MAGA shoe?
Would people be allowed to get upset at that?
You have the pentagram.
It's like...
And there's human blood in them as well.
Oh, it's lovely.
One drop of blood.
A drop of human blood.
Phenomenal.
Here's my question to people that never see, that don't understand why anyone would have a problem.
I'm not saying you have to have a problem with this.
I'm saying the people that don't understand why anyone would have a problem with it.
What would have been too much if Lil Nas X had given Satan a rim job?
If he had eaten Satan's asshole on the video, would that have been too much?
If Satan had blown a load all over Lil Nas X, like Satan takes out his big dick and Lil Nas X is jerking away.
Is that, is there any, would anything be too much here?
Because it does seem like we're being a bit obtuse.
The progressives are a little obtuse here and they go, yeah, we don't understand why it would be a problem that a singer whose fan base, a lot of them are children, is twerking with Satan and then selling satanic shoes.
We don't understand why that would bother anyone in a deeply Christian country.
It's like, it's almost like there's somebody that goes, hey, every argument that was made against gay marriage, let's do them now.
Let's actually enact them.
Remember how people said that genders wouldn't matter and they'd be, you know, it'd be like, let's let 12-year-olds do whatever they want.
And, you know, let's fuck Satan on MTV.
Like, that's all was going to happen.
It almost feels like somebody's like, let's do that.
I don't care what Lil Nas X does because Little Not X got famous because of a joke, right?
The song, Old Town Road, which is fine.
The whole thing's a troll to me.
None of it's real.
It's an NFT.
None of it.
It is what it is.
By the way, our NFT should be selling.
Rejecting Cookie Cutter Suburbs00:03:46
The target is $80 million.
And it is not.
What do we got?
Two grand?
Let me check on it.
You people have no respect.
This is our way out of this business.
It's not a joke.
It's real.
This NFT was our way out.
It was our way out.
Him and his wife, this was their wedding present.
I got to sign in one second.
Him and his wife, I was going to buy them a house with this money, and you fucks didn't do it.
We thought Joe Rogan was going to buy it for like $500,000, but that guy doesn't have any fucking money.
I think we have three bids on it.
It's at $1,800.
Oh, someone just went up on it.
So what do we got now on it?
Two Ethereum.
So we've got $3,300?
Yeah.
You guys better.
I thought we're getting 80 grand.
Don't you want to own this?
Do you not want to own the, how are him and his wife going to have a wedding and buy a house that they can live in?
Me and him are looking at houses now and he tells me I don't need space and that I should live in a house.
That's what I'm saying.
Him and his wife have the house.
I should live in that house.
He told me that I don't need space.
We're driving around and he goes, yeah, you don't need that much space.
We know you don't need a lot of space because I don't have, because I don't have a family.
Because him and his wife have been together for 90 years.
He just has no respect for anyone who's not in like a long-term committed relationship with someone else who escaped a cult.
And the reality is, yeah, I do like a little space.
I have friends.
I have people.
I like opulent and grand surroundings.
And he goes, you don't need any space.
And then he gets mad at me because I suggested, I had the temerity to suggest that my house be bigger than his.
That's all.
How many square foot is your home?
2,200.
And I said I wanted the yard to be bigger.
And I said, and then I played my identity card.
I said, I don't know if the neighbors like gay people.
So like, if I'm hanging out with a dude, I don't want to be like, you know, sandwiched in between people that are like, hey, you know, or if I say the word fuck or we're doing a Patreon and I say the word cunt, I don't think children should have to hear that language.
So I want to be, you know, I want to have a little space and live like a person that's done well.
And he's got a fucking problem with it and tell me like I should be living in a place like him and his wife.
That's not true.
But they're very cookie cutter people.
They have dogs.
They're like cookie cutter people.
So like they get into these little cookie cutter developments like a Dan Carney or anybody like that.
You should all live in those places.
I should have a long winding road with trees on either end.
And so that people know that when they get to me, they're going to meet a genius.
That's what it should be.
I shouldn't have to make small talk with the neighbors.
But you hate that.
And I know you and your wife sit around and go, he lives in that big house all by himself.
He doesn't need that space.
He should live in a small community like we do.
No, you've said you don't need the space.
I don't need the space.
I want it.
I like space.
I'm sorry about that.
I apologize.
I apologize.
I'm just saying you came at me a little bit.
No, we need the space with the yard 100%, but we don't need nine bedrooms.
We don't need nine bedrooms.
We don't need nine.
We don't need nine.
Do we have nine in this house?
Seven.
We don't need seven.
We don't need seven.
How many do you have?
Three.
Well, I'll move in there.
Tell your wife.
Go big.
Tim, you're right.
He doesn't need this space.
He'll be here tomorrow.
He's moving in.
I mean, these two are out of their mind.
You think I'm going to live with them in like some little community?
No, I'm trying to live.
Nine Bedrooms vs Space00:06:25
And it's not even about money.
It's about grandeur.
Do you understand?
It's about grandeur.
It's not about money.
The cookie cutter suburban.
I've left the suburbs to live in cities my entire life.
So if I'm out in Texas, I want to be in the woods.
I want to be somewhere cool that feels different.
I don't want to be in that cookie cutter suburban thing.
That's all.
I mean, that's my only thing is that I know that like it's lovely and I'm happy for both of you, but I want to be in a more of an interesting and mysterious part of the world.
And you don't respect that because you wish that I would like live on your block, you know, and like some crazy.
The Echo Park homeless encampment has been broken up.
And if you didn't know anything about Echo Park, it's a very kind of a hipster-friendly enclave of Los Angeles.
And the homeless park was a one of the articles here is from December 23rd, 2020.
It says the Homeless Republic of Echo Park, it's LA's fastest growing tent city.
What it was, was around this park in Echo Park that had a lake, they had maybe 40 tents that swelled during the pandemic, I think, to about 100 tents.
It was its own economy.
Now, the liberal white women from Echo Park were bringing cookies and yogurt and bottles of water.
And it was like a lot of the homeless people were younger and they were like kicking soccer balls around.
And some of them had cars and they were on bikes.
And it didn't seem that it was people that were completely incapable of working.
Listen, I know that providing no mental health care, no health care, and the economy sucks.
I'm aware of all of that.
Shutting down.
I'm not saying that there's not a reason that people are homeless.
I'm shocked people, more of them aren't homeless than I know.
I'm shocked.
But this particular one was a little hip.
It was a little cool.
Some of the people that lived there were that like acted.
There was one guy, if you scroll down, there was one guy who did a commercial for Lady Gaga's.
Yeah, this guy here, he did a fragrance commercial for Lady Gaga's fame.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, he was in that, but then he's, you know, he had a mental thing and now he's in the Echo Park homeless encampment.
And of course, a lot of this dovetail is very nice with all the protesting because people come to protest.
And the DSA comes in and they charge everyone's phone.
It's a good, it's, and a lot of people think this is the reason like this is working.
So a lot of people like, this is a great idea.
It's a thriving community.
How dare you try to get rid of it?
From what I understand, all the homeless people were offered housing, but they didn't want that.
It was like, hey, this is a fun community.
We all enjoy it.
Now there's people overdosing on fentanyl in the tents.
Somebody got shot.
I mean, we know how these things go.
We know what ends up happening.
We're adults.
So we know that like, yes, rich people are fucked up.
They don't care about any of this shit.
They push the economy over a cliff.
People end up being homeless.
But also these enclaves of homeless people that pop up with these underground economies with drugs and whatever else is going on there, they tend to go bad as well because there tend to be some power struggles and some problems as well.
Like Chaz and where was it, Seattle?
Yeah, that didn't work.
So these things tend not to work, but children, and that's the vast majority of people that are, you know, support this stuff.
They're children.
And they like the idea of it because it's like, well, it's like the idea of never having to go to school every day.
And we build a fort in the living room and we'll just have fun and we can ride bikes all day.
And I have some candy and you have some candy and we can share it.
But this isn't it.
It's really not it.
It's not the answer.
Okay.
Something should happen that is more productive than this.
How great would it be?
I just thought of Felery Smith, just again, because I always want to give people advice for their career.
If she went completely the other way and just walked out on stage whenever they do Skank Fest and she came out with swastika pasties on her tits and just started and just started like whipping a black guy with a, fucking whip and just started doing like slave point.
Like there's such another way she can go.
That just I thought about that.
But here, keep going down here.
One of my favorite parts of the article, there was a guy yelling at, I forget who it was, a cop or something.
And they found out that this guy, this guy that was yelling at the cop, showed up in a BMW X5, and his dad was a producer for Gray's Anatomy.
Oh, okay.
I thought it was this thing.
No, but so this is it, Rennie.
So this is what I'm going to say.
No, we're going to read that because this is kind of hilarious.
Because what this is, by the way, is, you know, and again, I'm not.
We know the LAPD are one of the most corrupt police forces in the history of the country, right?
Nobody's defending the LAPD.
But this idea that this is a good solution, this tent city in Echo Park where people are ODing on fentanyl in the tent.
And you also, and it was a girl who like had, she was, she had like a lot of acceptances to colleges and she got up and got into the whole protest scene and then went to this park and ended up, I think, ODing and everything.
And you just feel if you get up every day to go to work and you own a house, and again, you're the enemy to these people if you do that.
But if you own a house, you get up every day to go to work and you look at this park and you go, you know, everybody there's having fun.
They're kicking soccer balls.
They're fucking the people that have passed out on fentanyl.
You start saying to yourself, why am I the idiot going to work?
I should be in the park having fun.
So I get that too.
But so here we have somebody who wrote this and this was shared by a comedian on Twitter who I like who I think is funny.
Homeless Girl ODs in Park00:13:01
But so this is someone's idea.
And by the way, this wasn't like the worst homeless thing ever, by the way.
They were like, they were like somewhat well behaved.
It was like pretty.
But again, it was like, it doesn't work.
It doesn't work for a myriad of reasons, right?
One of them being that putting a lot of people in the park that have mental illnesses and addictions and criminal, it doesn't work.
Why?
Because I'm a sane person and I know it doesn't work.
This was written.
This was my favorite.
A year has gone by in which housed and unhoused neighbors have worked together to create a beautiful and much lauded homeless run outdoor community at Echo Park Lake.
So again, we've been there.
Beautiful is a stretch.
It's not horrible.
It's not horrible.
Not horrible.
But the idea of the beautiful and much lauded, okay, who's lauding it?
But whatever.
We have built and shared kitchens, hot showers, a community garden, trash cleanup, a sense of security, safety, stability, and healing for drug addiction and mental illness.
This is my favorite.
With our own pioneering forms of therapy in the absence of any help from the city government.
Our own therapy.
Okay.
This community has drawn widespread neighborhood and Los Angeles organizational support, including all the things.
LA, the DSA, blah, blah, blah.
We have also received media coverage from NPR, The Times.
So Mitch O'Farrell, this guy, who is a corrupt Irish guy, in conjunction with the LAPD declared their plan to forcibly displace up to 50-plus tent dwellers of Echo Park Lake, ASAP.
I think obviously the problem here is very big.
There's tent cities springing up all over the country.
COVID has been the nail in the coffin for a lot of economies that were struggling anyway.
Biden's trying to figure out how to do something about that.
It's going to be a massive stimulus.
How meaningful that will be is up to, you know, we'll see.
There's going to be other things that are going to have to be done as well in conjunction with that.
But this idea that you have a homeless community that had grown very sizable and it had become a problem.
There were violence.
There were problems.
This was not just, you know, it was not like, you know, people make it sound like it's, you know, like, you know, Willy Wonka's chocolate factory when everybody's like working together.
It's not necessarily the case.
I'm not saying it was the worst place in the world, but I'm saying you had the problems in that community that you would imagine springing up in any situation.
Okay.
And you could list, we could list them.
I'm not going to list them, but they're there.
There's overdoses.
There's fights.
There's drugs.
There's all scrimmage, homeless guys stabbing each other.
It's what happens when you have a lawless enclave of people that have mental illnesses.
That's what happens.
And then the cops, you know, went in there and there's protesters and everything like that.
But the LA comedians that are really defending it should have to live there.
Like the LA comics that really are like, this is how dare they, they should have to live in that community.
Because that's not, that can't be the solution.
Just the same way the solution can't be putting spikes under bridges so they can't sleep there.
The solution can't be a community in a park where everybody's in a tent making lanyard necklaces and doing fentanyl.
I know it sounds fun.
I get it.
Put on the fentanyl patch and make a beaded necklace.
I went to recreation as a child too, but something must go on.
There must be a little bit more forward momentum than a bunch of homeless people kicking soccer balls, complaining that they didn't get the part to be an extra in the season three of Shrill.
There should be something else.
We got to figure something else out.
And it doesn't help that fucking Mitch O'Farrell sounds like the most fucking corrupt mick fuck ever.
But this is what I mean.
Like it's like, like in the article, the guy goes, we're not like your average homeless.
He's like, we're not like old.
He's like, we're not.
I think he was kind of saying like, we're not like homeless.
We're just, we're not your average homeless.
Like we're like, we're here to have fun.
We're here to get noticed.
I mean, they had a brand.
The Echo Park Lake, I mean, they were very close to branding.
They were almost there.
They were a few months away from a reality show at the Echo Park, Homeless Run outdoor community at Echo Park Lake.
They were a few months away from a reality show.
The cameras going in there and just filming people, you know, fighting each other over a smoothie they found.
But this is a lot of consternation on Twitter.
There's a lot of rage.
People are very angry about that these people were displaced.
I think they were all offered housing.
I hope they were offered housing.
That was supposedly what happened.
You know?
But again, this is one of those things where if you point out that this isn't a solution, it's a problem.
People look at you like you are pro the big business corporate.
I'm not at all.
I think those people are scum and the people that squeeze every dollar out of society and then leave people.
And this is why you warn against things like that.
So you do not have large numbers of economically displaced people, mentally ill people.
I'm aware of all that.
But then you have the other group of people that go, this is also, this is the solution.
The solution is to take over a park and to have people there sharing a hot shower and, you know, a community garden and thinking that that is the solution to the problem, which it is clearly not, as evidenced by the violence, sporadic though it may be.
I'm sure it, you know, people's, people's experiences there are different, you know, but I just, I love the idea of that where people are like, to just even question that that's the solution.
They go, maybe that's not a good idea for everybody to be in the park having orgies and doing fentanyl, which is how this girl died.
They go, so what?
And, you know, so you have people in LA that are like, this is an outrage.
This is the most beautiful part of the state.
These are people loving each other.
They were learning about community.
They were learning about what it takes to help each other.
Maybe.
But isn't the goal to be in a house?
Isn't the goal to be in an apartment?
Wouldn't the goal be to get some of those people, if they're doing so well at the lake, let's get them some turlets and some walls and watch this baby really cook if they're doing so well.
They're making it sound like they're killing it over there.
And I'm sure that there's merit to that argument that things aren't as bad as they could be.
Because that's what these arguments all really boil down to.
Like it could be much worse.
And I'm sure it could be.
But let's get them out of there.
Let's put them in a situation where they have the chance to succeed.
I think part of the worry of moving them out of the park is that that was the only place in America that they were safe from the rash of anti-Asian hate crimes happening every minute, every square foot on every block in the country.
So they had created this bulwark against that by doing fentanyl in a tent by the Echo Park Lake and sharing burritos or whatever.
And again, these aren't like old homeless.
These aren't the homeless with the big foot where they have one big foot, diabetes.
This isn't those homeless.
This isn't like these are kind of like, hey, it's like LA homeless.
Like, yeah, I'm in Echo Park.
You know, I'm just like, oh, fuck yeah.
And I don't know who got to live there and why.
Like, it's very interesting to know who, like, who got in and who didn't.
There had to be some selection process because there's a lot of homeless people in LA.
How many of them were allowed into the Echo Park?
Well, you had to have a tent, number one.
One lady was like, we have two tents, which is against the rules, but they thought it was cool, so they let us do it.
I'm like, okay.
So the co-op board was like, we can let it, we'll let it slide.
You know, I'm sure there was no, nothing exchanged there.
And I'm all for that, by the way.
I'm all for people flopping around in a tent on fentanyl.
The problem is, if you're walking in the park with your child and they see that, they might, I guess, be more likely to then do fentanyl in a tent, which isn't the goal.
Can we say that that's not the goal?
Would it be okay to say that that isn't the goal?
That if I had a child, I would not want them living in a tent in Echo Park doing fentanyl.
Is that okay to say?
Or is that a problem?
Is that a function of my privilege that I would rather my child or my friend's child or my godson not be doing synthetic heroin in a Coleman camping tent by the lake in Echo Park?
Is that something that I'm still allowed to say as an American citizen?
I have weird beliefs.
I want my late night comedy shows funny, and I would like the people to not be doing dope in a tent by the park because there's better ways to go about life, probably.
I'm not a perfect person by, you know, clearly.
So this is the end.
They go like this.
They go, to sum it up, to Mitch O'Farrell, to Mitch O'Farrell.
God, could you have a worse name?
Our demand is simply this.
Please continue to leave us alone or stand with us.
Ignore us as if we didn't exist, much like you've been doing, and enjoy your corruption and greed or come out and stand with us.
Stand in solidarity with all of your constituents, not just those with money and housing.
And watch as we make sure District 13 becomes a beacon of light for the world.
Reshaping and reimagining what it means to be a community of people living together.
So what they're saying is more homeless.
That's kind of the attitude.
A bigger camp.
Let's reshape and reimagine what it means to live together.
Like you have a house and I'm going to live in a tent on your lawn and I'll use the bathroom where I want and I'll use the drugs I want and I'll, you know, if I have a mental illness or if I'm pedophile, I'll deal with your kids in whichever way that I see fit.
Because we're going to, quote, reshape and reimagine what it means to be a community of people living together.
And if again, it is all fun and games, if you are not the father of the daughter who died of a fentanyl overdose in the park, who, you know, clearly was led astray.
She went to LA to protest and get involved in movements, which she believed in.
And, you know, I get it.
Good for you.
But it apparently didn't go to where it should have went.
And she got caught up in this scene in this world and she ended up dead.
Again, if you're caught in the crossfire, like that guy, the guy who was the lady guy guy, a bullet grazed his leg because he was caught in a thing that he didn't even have anything to do with.
So again, if you're one of these people that are affected when it goes bad, you don't think this is the solution.
Torture at Guantanamo Bay00:12:19
And the solution also isn't to ignore this and to just let, you know, Jeff Bezos make the people on Amazon pee in bags or whatever he's doing.
You know, he's making them to use pee bags and he's letting them, you know, I mean, it's crazy.
But again, I just, it's sad because Ellery Smith is now living here.
And she was still pro-consequence culture.
She's like, take their taking her out of the park.
She's like, I'm still pro-consequence culture, even though I've been thrown out of my new home, which I've only been in 24 hours at the lovely Echo Park Lake homeless community.
A lot of fun stuff coming up that we're very excited about.
Did I send you anything else to talk about?
Oh, well, this was a great question.
Oh, yes.
Yes.
Yes.
I almost forgot.
This is a new segment on the show.
Do you remember where are they now?
Remember that?
Where they would find stars from your favorite sitcoms and musicians, maybe one-hit wonders or people you hadn't heard from in a while?
Where are they now?
Well, we're doing it again.
This is the Tim Dylan show.
Where are they now?
This is from the New York Times.
They were Guantanamo's first detainees.
Here's where they are now.
I hope one of them's a music manager and working with Danny Lovato.
Let's see.
Let's go to where they are now.
Oh, man.
Just two of the men are still at Guantanamo.
All right.
That's depressing.
Let's get rid of that.
I want to know where are they now?
Who's improved?
Do they tell us?
Not really.
One guy actually.
They don't tell us.
One guy they accidentally released and he's like the leader of the Taliban now.
Why wouldn't he be?
Here's where they are now.
They're plotting against our country for good reason.
Here's where they are now.
They're doing all the things we thought they were doing before that they probably weren't even doing.
Do they not give us an update on anybody?
Is there not one success story?
Is there not one person we tortured mercilessly for a decade based on dubious intelligence that came out and now runs a weave startup?
Is there none of that going on?
Is there not one Bitcoin entrepreneur?
Nobody's big in crypto.
There's not one of these guys who launched an energy drink when he was laying there being tortured going, I wish I had more energy, but they won't let me eat my food and they keep waking me up every few hours.
You know, which Bush assured us was necessary.
And man, I'd love to have an energy drink right now.
So he came up with an energy drink.
Is he having a problem getting the first round of funding?
Is the seed capital the issue?
Ben Saul, a law school professor in Sydney, Australia, who in 2016 helped Mr. Hicks, a guy named David Hicks.
Is he the Australian convert to Islam?
Yeah, they went to Australia.
He said he's working in landscape gardening and had ongoing physical and mental health issues as a result of his treatment by the U.S. before and at Gitma.
I mean, hey, man, when George Washington said we should not torture the British, what a cock.
You know what I mean?
What a cuck.
I think it's a great idea that we started a labyrinth of underground torture prisons where we just rounded up people that may or may not have been a terrorist, whatever that means, and tortured them mercilessly, many of them like teenagers in their late teens, and tortured them mercilessly for years.
President Bush, instead of being painting, should be in jail right now.
He should literally be in jail.
If it was a functioning democracy, which we know it's not, he would be in prison.
He would be in jail for this.
Dick Cheney would be in jail.
Donald Rumsfeld would be in jail.
But of course, it's, you know, it's not.
And the barbecue in Kansas City sucks.
So what's the point?
It sucks because it's like TGI Fridays.
It's that sweet whiskey glaze sauce.
I don't want to start shitting on specific restaurants.
I'm not trying to hurt anybody making a living.
I'm just saying this.
Austin's the king of barbecue.
I hoped in that article they were going to tell us that a few of the people at Guantanamo Bay, who we waterboarded, were now running a taco truck in Austin.
I mean, it's amazing.
Remember that when that came out?
Everyone's like, it's a conspiracy.
It's a conspiracy theory.
These people talk less about discrimination than like almost anyone, by the way.
People that, you know where they should be on SNL.
They should be on Saturday Night Live doing sketches, doing bits, because this was one of the most disgraceful periods of our country's history.
And we were all sold it by 24 and Jack Power because there was a ticking time bomb.
Well, what happens when there's a ticking time bomb?
I don't know, like a memo saying that bin Laden was going to strike and that they were going to use planes and that you had all the intelligence.
You had it at the Kuala Lumpur meeting with Khalid Sheikh Muhammad and NORAD and the Jets ended up being somewhere else and this and the that.
You mean one of those ticking time bumps?
One of those?
Oh, I don't know.
Hmm.
Tick, tick, tick.
But that's a great news segment for the show.
Where are they now?
And I think this is just the beginning.
I think the Guantanamo women's are just the beginning.
I hope.
I hope that America can really embrace a lot of the good that we've done.
Where are they now?
Where are the kids whose soccer games in Pakistan we bombed?
Where are they now?
Tell us where they are now.
Where are they now?
How about the people in Yemen who we've starved to death because we keep giving Saudi Arabia money?
Where are they now?
But we don't like to talk about this on SNL because it's depressing.
All right.
You want me to write some jokes about imperialism?
Put me in, coach.
I'll write you a bit or two.
You want me to go in there?
I'll tell you.
I'll tell you what's happening.
But, yeah, I mean, where are they now?
I didn't realize there was like 800 people that have gone through Guantanamo.
And they're out now.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Well, Guantanamo is just this great idea, you know, where we would bring people that aren't guilty of anything, a lot of them, literally many of them, and then torture them, giving both the...
By the way, there was some documentary where like a Guantanamo guard, I think he converted to Islam and became friends with like one of the dudes.
Oh, really?
There's some documentary about that.
That's how you know what you're doing as a country's working.
That's how you know you're doing, it's good.
When your guards are starting to convert to Islam because they feel so bad about torturing these people, that's how you know it's a great move.
It's a good move.
And then Bush is painting up people in hijabs, talking about how much he loves immigrants.
Everyone talks about how bad Trump was because he tweeted something mean at Megan Kelly.
That makes a lot of sense.
Is this them?
Where are they now?
Are they protesting the closure of the Echo Park homeless encampment?
After an initial period of confinement, they now live with their families in housing provided by the Qataris.
They can move freely around the cosmopolitan capital.
The women shop at local markets.
The children study in a Pakistani-run school, but need the blessing of their host country as well as the United States and destination to travel abroad.
So they're on like house arrest, kind of.
The Trump administration transferred only one detainee and admitted al-Qaeda terrorists who was sent to his native Saudi Arabia to complete a military commission prison sentence under a plea agreement negotiated during the Obama administration.
Among the 30 Yemeni prisoners taken in by the oil state of Oman were blank, blank, blank.
He found work in a factory, married, and is now father to two children.
I met how many people we just tortured to death there.
You know?
Like, God only knows.
And by the way, Guantanamo was the one we knew about.
There was all these black sites we didn't know about where people were just getting tortured to death.
Yeah.
You know, well, there you go, folks.
That's the government we all know and love.
Look at that.
Isn't that nice?
I get it.
We need a military.
We can't have terrorists running around.
Also, like, you know, this doesn't seem to be the most effective way to do it to bring in a bunch of people, torture them, and send them back into their countries of origin to then come back and attack us now with a reason.
You know what I mean?
It's like, let's give them a reason, you know?
Yeah, you, you, yeah, 9-11, now we're going to give you a reason.
We'll give you a real reason to do another one.
Yeah.
Oh, listen to this.
Abd al-Malik, a Yemeni, was sent to resettle in a peaceful nation, Montenegro.
He received a government stipend for a time after his release in 2016, but that ran out.
He tried to raise funds by selling artwork he made at Guantanamo.
NFT, but made his last sale last year.
And as the ambition to work as a driver in God, there never materialized as a tourism-dependent economy tanked.
That's sad.
He wanted to be like a tour guide in Montenegro.
It's sad.
Like, imagine him.
Like, he's a tour guide in Montenegro.
He's like, it's beautiful here.
He's like, and I should know the places I've been.
I mean, he's just doing, you know.
Four of those first 20 men all released by the Bush administration could not be found.
They're dead or we killed them or they're doing things that will lead to problems, perhaps.
But, all right, that's depressing enough.
I just like to catch up on them.
Where are they now?
I wanted more success stories.
And I'm sure that there are more success stories.
I think we're just probably looking at the negative side of the picture.
I'm sure there's a lot of people that rebounded from that in a big way and are using what they learned to build a brand.
And I hope they're all building brands.
That's the question.
We should have Gary Van Ychuk talk to people that were tortured at Gitmo and teach them how to build brands.
What a great clubhouse room.
Gary Vee tells you how to build a brand when you wake up every two hours screaming.
We have hoodies coming.
They're on their way.
We'll get them very soon.
If you like them, buy them.
If you don't, we are on the road.
We are late with this episode.
We're not going to be late anymore.
Florida sold out.
A lot of this is sold out.
Anything that's left is on the website.
Most of it's sold out.
Chicago's still not on the website, right?
Guess not.
Okay, great.
I don't know why, but that's fine.
Like, subscribe to the YouTube channel, to the all the bullshit that we do.
Follow me on social media, Tim J. Dillon, Instagram, Twitter.
I post updates there.
Follow Ben Avery at Ben Avery is Good.
Give Dan Carney a follow if you want.
We'll be out doing stand-up.
We'll be doing stuff.
And we'll be focusing on getting a Guantanamo guy on the show to kind of update us on everything he's been up to.
Florida Shows Sold Out00:02:17
What's it been like?
You know?
Probably the Australian guy, right?
David?
David Hicks.
Well, who, no, I want a real, like, I don't want some convert.
I want like a legit guy.
But I also want them to, I want to, I want a media landscape where a 25-year-old white girl explains to a person who is brutally tortured by our government why he has to have his pronouns in his bio on social, like why he needs to identify as a man or a woman.
That to me is the moment when everything clicks.
When Ellery Smith or any white chick turns around to a guy and goes, I understand that you've been through things.
But what I want you to do right now is really understand how your words are weapons.
They're daggers.
So I want you to just respect me and refer to me as they.
Okay.
And he's sitting there.
He's like, ugh.
Okay.
Good.
You know, I hope I want to see that.
There's just something I want to say.
I want to see somebody that was on Guantanamo Bay go into SNL and do a funny bit and have Colin Joe sit there staring at them like, like, what?
Like, what the hell happened here?
You know, the guy's like, and then they put the electrodes on their penis.
And Colin just kind of sitting there smiling like, he's like, really?
That's, yeah, that's tough.
What did he say to Bowen?
He goes, that's tough, huh?
So I want one of those guys.
I want one of those guys to go.
And then they put water down my throat and showed me pictures of my family.
And they told me they were already dead.
And Colin goes, oh, that's tough.
That's tough.
That's tough.
And you know, and then he turns around and he goes, but I don't want to be talking about this.