Danny Jones Podcast - #104 - Venezuela's Most Wanted Fraudster | Juan Sanchez
Aired: 2021-07-28
Duration: 02:14:06


=== Juan Sanchez's Prison Story (03:51) ===

[00:00:01]  Hello world.
[00:00:03]  Juan Sanchez is a real estate con man who served nearly a decade in prison for committing $30 million in bank fraud.
[00:00:10]  During his scheme, he lost millions of dollars, which he was supposed to be laundering for the Sinaloa cartel.
[00:00:16]  And as a result, he was kidnapped by the Venezuelan government and barely escaped with his life.
[00:00:22]  Juan's story about escaping Venezuela and the threats that he got from the Venezuelan government are absolutely terrifying.
[00:00:30]  And it's amazing that this guy is still alive and able to tell his story.
[00:00:34]  Without further ado, please welcome juan Sanchez.
[00:00:46]  Juan Sanchez.
[00:00:47]  Yes, sir.
[00:00:47]  How are you doing, man?
[00:00:48]  How are you doing?
[00:00:49]  I'm great.
[00:00:49]  I'm great.
[00:00:50]  Thank you for coming on here to tell your story with Matt.
[00:00:53]  Matt's very familiar with the story.
[00:00:54]  He told me about you.
[00:00:55]  Yes.
[00:00:55]  You guys recently did a really interesting podcast together.
[00:00:59]  You guys are both mortgage fraudsters.
[00:01:02]  We like to call it colleagues.
[00:01:04]  Colleagues.
[00:01:04]  Yeah, we're both colleagues.
[00:01:05]  But you guys didn't work together in mortgage.
[00:01:07]  No, no, no, no.
[00:01:08]  Okay, okay.
[00:01:08]  How did you guys meet?
[00:01:09]  That's, sorry, that's funny.
[00:01:11]  When he got to Coleman?
[00:01:12]  Yeah, we did time in the same prison.
[00:01:15]  Okay.
[00:01:16]  When you go into prison, they kind of screen you out.
[00:01:18]  You know, they screen you out based on your race and based on your crime and the time you got.
[00:01:24]  So I walked in and they asked me, listen, what are you here for?
[00:01:26]  I said, fraud.
[00:01:27]  They said, how much money?
[00:01:29]  39 million.
[00:01:31]  And they just made the numbers in their minds.
[00:01:33]  They're like, okay, 39 millions.
[00:01:34]  How much time did you get?
[00:01:35]  I said, 15 years.
[00:01:36]  Okay.
[00:01:37]  Yeah, it adds up.
[00:01:38]  It adds up.
[00:01:39]  You know that guy over there?
[00:01:40]  Yeah, that's Matt Cox.
[00:01:42]  That's who you need to talk to.
[00:01:43]  So I guess he was like the rep of the fraudsters in the prison.
[00:01:46]  Ooh, is that true, Matt?
[00:01:48]  I remember.
[00:01:48]  I mean, I do remember him kind of coming over and I didn't know the whole background where they were like anything, but he came over.
[00:01:55]  He was like, hey, can I talk to you?
[00:01:57]  He screamed me out.
[00:01:58]  He said, well, let me talk to you about, you know, bank fraud.
[00:02:00]  And what do you know about putting together, you know, fake identities and people and giving them a social security?
[00:02:06]  And I said, yeah.
[00:02:06]  And you put the trade lines.
[00:02:07]  And he's like, oh, we're going to get along.
[00:02:10]  You know what you're talking about.
[00:02:11]  So, yeah, we had a little group of, they used to call them the smart white people.
[00:02:18]  The smart white people.
[00:02:19]  Yeah.
[00:02:19]  And they will tell me like, listen, why don't you go play with the smart white people?
[00:02:22]  And yeah, and it will be him and Frank and Doug and we'll play Risk Wow, so you guys are in the same little club in Florida?
[00:02:29]  Yeah, we have a little club.
[00:02:31]  We had our own gang.
[00:02:32]  I don't know how Doug got involved.
[00:02:34]  Yeah, well, he was like Frank.
[00:02:35]  He qualified.
[00:02:36]  He qualified 50% of the requirement there.
[00:02:39]  Not smart.
[00:02:40]  Yeah.
[00:02:41]  So when did you get released?
[00:02:42]  I got released December 23rd.
[00:02:45]  I didn't know I was getting released.
[00:02:47]  Oh, last year?
[00:02:48]  Yeah, I've been out for seven months.
[00:02:50]  Okay, wow.
[00:02:50]  Yeah, that's why I still smell like a Mackerel.
[00:02:53]  Wow.
[00:02:54]  Yeah.
[00:02:54]  I carry stamps in my pockets and things like that.
[00:02:57]  I'm still getting used to currency.
[00:02:59]  And you were telling me before we started recording, you're not allowed to drive still.
[00:03:02]  I'm not allowed to work either.
[00:03:03]  That's correct.
[00:03:04]  When I was released from prison on June 2nd, and then I was taken to ICE.
[00:03:11]  So I was under immigration custody for seven months.
[00:03:15]  And in there, I got a removal order.
[00:03:19]  And due to the nature of my case or one of my cases, my life is at risk if they send me back to Venezuela.
[00:03:26]  I have a.
[00:03:27]  Former friends that want to kill me.
[00:03:32]  More like clients.
[00:03:33]  Clients that they want to kill me.
[00:03:36]  Really?
[00:03:36]  Yeah.
[00:03:37]  I can't go back to Venezuela.
[00:03:38]  I cannot go back to Venezuela.
[00:03:39]  It would be bad.
[00:03:40]  Yeah.
[00:03:41]  I think I will make it past 50,000 feet.
[00:03:45]  Really?
[00:03:45]  Yeah.
[00:03:46]  Like as I'm on the plane.
[00:03:48]  Are you worried about your safety, even being in Florida?
[00:03:51]  Well, not in Florida.

=== Immigration Custody and Removal Orders (15:35) ===

[00:03:53]  You know, it's hardly ever you'll find somebody that will do the job.
[00:03:57]  My kids were worried for a while.
[00:03:59]  But definitely going abroad, yeah, it's a problem for me.
[00:04:03]  Because it's government people and they have long arms.
[00:04:06]  So Colombia, Brazil, Spain, you know, those countries, they have a lot of influence there.
[00:04:11]  So going back, how did you eventually land in prison?
[00:04:16]  How did you land in Coleman?
[00:04:18]  Yeah, how did you come to the United States?
[00:04:20]  Well, I didn't come to the United States to do time in prison.
[00:04:23]  I came before that, Matt.
[00:04:25]  So you came to the United States?
[00:04:27]  I actually lived a straight line for a while.
[00:04:29]  For a short while.
[00:04:30]  Short while.
[00:04:31]  So I came to the United States.
[00:04:32]  I'm from Venezuela.
[00:04:33]  So I came to the United States when I was 16, 15, 16.
[00:04:37]  Went to high school in Florida.
[00:04:39]  Then I went to Minnesota, St. Cloud, Minnesota, and I did some college there.
[00:04:43]  And I got into fraternities and partying.
[00:04:46]  And, you know, I was a dark-skinned guy in an all-white town and, you know, quite popular.
[00:04:51]  And then I moved back to Orlando.
[00:04:54]  And I didn't have any money.
[00:04:55]  I didn't know what to do.
[00:04:56]  I got my real estate license and I started selling Timeshare.
[00:05:00]  And I realized that I had a talent for persuading people.
[00:05:05]  You know, I don't know if you guys ever been to a Timeshare presentation.
[00:05:08]  Never, no.
[00:05:08]  Never?
[00:05:09]  I think everybody should go to one.
[00:05:11]  Really?
[00:05:11]  Yeah.
[00:05:12]  They invite you for two Disney tickets.
[00:05:14]  Yeah.
[00:05:14]  And a free breakfast and 90 minutes later you're walking out of there with a fifty thousand dollar mortgage on a product that doesn't work.
[00:05:23]  And I was really good.
[00:05:24]  I actually became one of the top salespeople in the world in 2000, in 1991 1992, and then I got hired by another company to develop their training program and I developed it, I executed it and I quit and they enforce a non-compete, So I couldn't work for two years.
[00:05:47]  And during those two years, I decided to start teaching real estate to Spanish people because there wasn't a real estate school that was teaching in Spanish.
[00:05:58]  Like this format that you guys have right now.
[00:06:00]  I'm Hispanic.
[00:06:01]  So I look at concrete and I think the channel is phenomenal.
[00:06:04]  But nobody's doing what you guys are doing in Spanish.
[00:06:08]  So I will find those niches and kind of like attack them.
[00:06:12]  So I opened my real estate school and I became.
[00:06:15]  Like a cult leader.
[00:06:16]  I had these people coming to my classes and I will motivate them and I made them walk through glass and break boards.
[00:06:24]  So you're like the Hispanic Tony Robbins yeah Antonio, Antonio Robbins yeah, that's a.
[00:06:30]  That's a whole that story all together.
[00:06:33]  But but yeah, so I I had like a little cultish thing going and I said man, I can't get these guys to sell for me.
[00:06:41]  I can open, like a time, like a real estate timeshare organization.
[00:06:46]  So I had hundreds of people with a real estate license Working for me.
[00:06:51]  And that's how I got into the real estate market, actually.
[00:06:54]  I realized that nobody was doing what I was doing, bringing masses of salespeople to bring masses of clients into projects.
[00:07:02]  What year was this?
[00:07:04]  Oh my God, 2001.
[00:07:08]  Because I remember my first real estate class, I had to cancel it because the Twin Towers had happened.
[00:07:13]  Wow.
[00:07:14]  And I was teaching in like the 11th floor of the Holiday Inn.
[00:07:17]  And my wife at the time called me and was like, oh my God, the next plane is going to you.
[00:07:22]  So, yeah.
[00:07:24]  So I did that and because I had so many salespeople, I was able to sell things that nobody was selling.
[00:07:31]  So developers started reaching out to me and they said, listen, man, we have this property.
[00:07:36]  As a matter of fact, I had a product here in Tampa.
[00:07:39]  I had a couple projects here in when you say projects, what do you mean specifically?
[00:07:43]  You had these developers that bought apartment complexes and they couldn't sell them.
[00:07:48]  They would buy them, break them into pieces and sell them an apartment at a time.
[00:07:52]  Condo.
[00:07:52]  Condo.
[00:07:53]  That's what I call it.
[00:07:53]  Right, right, right.
[00:07:54]  Tampa Palms was big into that back in those days.
[00:07:58]  So they will call me in and say, man, we made a mistake.
[00:08:00]  We bought this property and we can sell it.
[00:08:03]  Can you help us out?
[00:08:04]  And I'll say, well, 150 apartments.
[00:08:06]  Let me see.
[00:08:06]  I have 300 salespeople.
[00:08:08]  If 50% of my sales force sells one, I'll sell you out in two weeks.
[00:08:15]  So I will put it out there in one of my classes and they will go in there and boom, you sell it out in a week or two weeks.
[00:08:21]  And I became well known for that.
[00:08:23]  I was the go-to guy to sell product that nobody was buying.
[00:08:26]  How much money are you making at that time?
[00:08:28]  Doing this with 300 salespeople?
[00:08:31]  Well, in the seven digits, maybe.
[00:08:34]  Yeah.
[00:08:34]  Throughout the real estate school, people were paying me $300 a pop to take my classes.
[00:08:40]  I was filling up a room with 100, 150 people every weekend.
[00:08:44]  So I was doing really good.
[00:08:45]  You were doing well at that time.
[00:08:46]  Really well.
[00:08:47]  But then the problem is people like Matt got in the industry and they started getting the banks a little nervous.
[00:08:56]  So they started saying, well, you know, we're going to start asking for down payment.
[00:09:00]  You guys are young.
[00:09:01]  You don't remember the days of no money down to buy a house.
[00:09:04]  No, unfortunately.
[00:09:05]  I've heard the stories though.
[00:09:06]  Oh my God.
[00:09:07]  Listen, you will go anywhere and you'll say, well, half a million dollars.
[00:09:11]  How much do I need down?
[00:09:11]  I don't know, $700 for the appraisal?
[00:09:16]  And how about, you know, for the down payment?
[00:09:17]  No, don't worry about it.
[00:09:18]  We got it.
[00:09:19]  So everybody bought no money down.
[00:09:22]  Then the banks said, listen, we're not going to take no money down anymore.
[00:09:27]  We need 10%.
[00:09:28]  We need 15%.
[00:09:30]  Well, I had people on contracts with no money down.
[00:09:33]  So that's when things began to get a little shady for me.
[00:09:38]  But it's funny because I was talking to Matt on the way here.
[00:09:43]  To be a white collar fraudster, You have to understand the concept of fraud.
[00:09:50]  And I think you guys are like the audience.
[00:09:52]  Like I did a podcast with Matt and people were going, what did he do that is wrong?
[00:09:56]  I bought my house like that.
[00:09:57]  And I'm like, listen, first of all, don't be saying that.
[00:10:00]  Okay, because you broke the law.
[00:10:02]  And second of all, fraud is such a weird concept to understand.
[00:10:09]  Because if you lie, it's not really fraud.
[00:10:13]  Like I told you, my name is Juan and we do this podcast.
[00:10:17]  And tomorrow you find out my name is Jose.
[00:10:20]  Well, I didn't commit fraud.
[00:10:22]  I just lied.
[00:10:24]  But if you sold product because my name was Juan and then your vendors come after you because they find out my name is Jose, then you suffer damages.
[00:10:35]  And that's the problem.
[00:10:37]  So as long as the banks were getting paid and everybody was making money, everybody was happy.
[00:10:42]  So the banks are not lending any money.
[00:10:44]  I get a call from this guy.
[00:10:45]  He says, man, I have 180 apartments.
[00:10:47]  I need to sell them out.
[00:10:48]  I said, okay, I'm going in, boop.
[00:10:50]  And I look at the apartments and I go, how much are you selling them for?
[00:10:53]  $150,000.
[00:10:54]  I said, Caroline, sell them for $300,000?
[00:10:58]  He said, yeah.
[00:11:00]  How are you going to do that?
[00:11:01]  I said, don't worry about it.
[00:11:03]  I got to increase the value of this apartment complex to $300,000.
[00:11:09]  How much do you want out of each apartment?
[00:11:10]  They said, $150,000.
[00:11:12]  I said, okay, so the other $150,000 I can use for whatever I want.
[00:11:16]  And he said, yeah, I don't care.
[00:11:17]  I said, all right, that's fine.
[00:11:18]  So what I would do is I would take two or three apartments and do a fake closing on them.
[00:11:24]  So I will register a buyer.
[00:11:27]  It will show a price of $300,000.
[00:11:29]  And then I will get an appraiser and say, listen, can you appraise this apartment for $300,000?
[00:11:33]  These are the comps.
[00:11:36]  So he will use those apartments and increase the value.
[00:11:38]  And then I will take buyers and I will tell them, don't worry about it.
[00:11:40]  If you don't have the down payment, I'll give it to you.
[00:11:43]  It's $300,000.
[00:11:45]  The down payment is 20%, so it's $60,000.
[00:11:47]  And on top of that, I'm going to give you $80,000 for you to take home.
[00:11:50]  On the closing table.
[00:11:52]  And they were loving it.
[00:11:54]  Loving it.
[00:11:54]  Weren't they suspicious of that though?
[00:11:57]  The clients or the bank?
[00:11:58]  The people that are buying it.
[00:11:59]  Like if someone's coming to you trying to sell it.
[00:12:02]  I mean, what do they care?
[00:12:03]  Like most people, if you told them, look, I'm going to give you $100,000 and I'm going to ruin your credit.
[00:12:09]  So you're going to have to claim bankruptcy.
[00:12:14]  Your credit's going to be ruined, but you get $100,000.
[00:12:18]  99% of people will go, absolutely, no problem.
[00:12:20]  I'll take it for $100,000.
[00:12:22]  Like when's a regular guy?
[00:12:24]  From Walmart, who works at Walmart, gonna get $100,000.
[00:12:28]  Where you're getting your buyers from is the key.
[00:12:30]  It could be any person, doesn't matter.
[00:12:32]  Even if they're suspicious, they're like, they think they're getting over on you.
[00:12:35]  Like, they're like, oh, yeah, I'll do that.
[00:12:37]  Like, oh my God, I hope he doesn't figure out that this doesn't make sense.
[00:12:39]  Well, you know what the main problem we had?
[00:12:41]  People would come and say, listen, can I buy five?
[00:12:44]  And you'll give me like $80,000 for each?
[00:12:47]  And I'll be like, well, I cannot give you $80,000 for each.
[00:12:50]  But if you buy five, you probably get about $60,000, maybe $50,000.
[00:12:54]  You do one owner occupied and four investment properties, which means you need a larger down payment, but I can still get your money back.
[00:13:01]  So you get $250,000.
[00:13:03]  So they'll say, okay, I want to buy five.
[00:13:05]  Or you'll do like a shotgun closing.
[00:13:07]  You close them all at the same time.
[00:13:10]  And they're all owner occupied.
[00:13:11]  I've done six.
[00:13:12]  No, I did.
[00:13:13]  Eight owner occupied duplexes.
[00:13:14]  One time she didn't move into one of them Jesus, for a, for a Hillsborough County sheriff's deputy's wife, sorry.
[00:13:24]  And what and what's crazy is back in those days, which is what's happening right now you didn't have to close in in the closing in the title company, so you will walk away with like five you know priority mail envelopes and you'll be like okay, sign here.
[00:13:36]  So not all right okay, now sign this one.
[00:13:38]  Now sign this one, now send it.
[00:13:39]  Congratulations, you own five apartments.
[00:13:42]  You take it back to the title company.
[00:13:43]  They close it.
[00:13:44]  They'll send you the check.
[00:13:46]  So it was insane.
[00:13:48]  And like that, I sold $39 million worth of real estate in one project.
[00:13:53]  How long did that take?
[00:13:55]  Probably about two months.
[00:13:57]  Damn.
[00:13:58]  Maybe two to three months.
[00:13:59]  Yeah.
[00:13:59]  Right.
[00:14:00]  Okay.
[00:14:00]  So everything is fine.
[00:14:02]  People are paying their mortgage.
[00:14:04]  Everybody's happy.
[00:14:05]  The bank's happy.
[00:14:06]  I'm happy.
[00:14:06]  The developers are happy.
[00:14:08]  Then one day, banks stop lending and the property starts going down.
[00:14:12]  2008.
[00:14:13]  Going down.
[00:14:13]  2006.
[00:14:15]  Oh, okay.
[00:14:15]  Yeah.
[00:14:16]  Going down and people stop paying their mortgages.
[00:14:19]  I get a letter saying, listen, you have 40 apartments in the project that you sold going on foreclosure.
[00:14:26]  I said, well, 40.
[00:14:27]  That means 140 are still good.
[00:14:29]  All right.
[00:14:29]  You know, there's properties going on foreclosure everywhere in the United States anyways.
[00:14:33]  That's a huge percentage.
[00:14:34]  Well, you know.
[00:14:35]  Then I get another letter and it's like, listen, dude, you have 80 apartments on foreclosure right now.
[00:14:42]  And I'm like, well, the economy is hurting.
[00:14:45]  These guys are probably hurting.
[00:14:46]  That's not my fault.
[00:14:48]  they'll pay it back.
[00:14:49]  They'll catch up with their loans, you know.
[00:14:51]  Then I get a letter saying, listen, 160 apartments are on foreclosure.
[00:14:55]  Like nobody's paying their freaking mortgage.
[00:14:57]  Who is writing you these letters?
[00:14:59]  Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, banks, the title company, because now they're going after the title company is going, listen, where are these people?
[00:15:08]  Yeah, where's the W-2s at?
[00:15:10]  Mortgage brokers.
[00:15:12]  I mean, everybody.
[00:15:13]  They're pointing the finger at everybody and everything's going back at me.
[00:15:17]  And the last person that contacted me about those apartments was the federal government.
[00:15:22]  And they said, dude, you sold 180 apartments?
[00:15:24]  Yeah.
[00:15:24]  They're all in foreclosure.
[00:15:26]  Like, nobody's paying their mortgage in there.
[00:15:29]  And the apartments are worth about $39,000 right now.
[00:15:32]  So.
[00:15:33]  Did you tell them you felt bad about that?
[00:15:35]  Nobody feels worse about that than me.
[00:15:37]  I was broken.
[00:15:38]  I'm just as bad.
[00:15:39]  But what really broke my heart is when the prosecutor said, and you know where I live?
[00:15:43]  A mile from that apartment complex.
[00:15:45]  So my house value went to shit because of you.
[00:15:48]  And I said, well, you know.
[00:15:49]  You should move.
[00:15:49]  It wasn't because of me because I didn't sell you your house, but you should have gotten cash back when you.
[00:15:54]  Could.
[00:15:54]  How much cash back did you get?
[00:15:57]  Listen, it's not too late.
[00:15:58]  I could have got you a better deal.
[00:15:59]  I could have gotten you five apartments and you could have paid off your house right yeah, did you anticipate any of this happening?
[00:16:05]  Did you anticipate these people maybe one day wouldn't be, wouldn't be able to pay their mortgages because obviously you didn't check their income or you didn't give a?
[00:16:11]  I didn't check anything, right?
[00:16:13]  Uh, we used to have what's called the mirror test and I used to tell them, listen, put a mirror in their face if it steams up.
[00:16:21]  You got a buyer.
[00:16:22]  He's alive, he's breathing.
[00:16:24]  You got a buyer, he's got a pulse.
[00:16:26]  Yeah, let's put him on black and white.
[00:16:27]  You know, That's hilarious.
[00:16:29]  And I had like these beautiful women at the sales center.
[00:16:32]  So guys will walk in and they will be like, well, you know, you can really get three apartments.
[00:16:37]  I mean, your credit is good.
[00:16:38]  And they will be like, okay, yeah.
[00:16:41]  And they will, you know.
[00:16:42]  So I had a whole setup.
[00:16:44]  So did I think it was going to happen?
[00:16:46]  I don't know.
[00:16:46]  I don't know what Matt's opinion is on this, but I think when you're on that role, it's such an adrenaline rush and you're kind of like getting away with things and that you start justifying what you're doing.
[00:16:59]  You can become emboldened too.
[00:17:00]  Every time there's a problem and you handle it, what's the big deal?
[00:17:05]  You're making that much money.
[00:17:06]  There's an issue.
[00:17:07]  You make a couple of phone calls.
[00:17:09]  It gets handled.
[00:17:09]  So what?
[00:17:10]  It's just the problem is when it starts coming in so fast, you can't handle the problems anymore.
[00:17:14]  You just don't anticipate it.
[00:17:16]  And a crime is a crime.
[00:17:18]  And I think sometimes, you know, like people hear us talking and they're like, man, somebody told me the other day, oh, you went to this guy's podcast and you're glorifying crime.
[00:17:26]  And I said, man, I'm not glorifying crime, but a crime is a crime.
[00:17:30]  You know?
[00:17:31]  So I want to hear you cry.
[00:17:32]  Nobody wants to see me sit here and cry and cry.
[00:17:36]  I feel so bad.
[00:17:38]  I'm so sorry.
[00:17:39]  And it's so bad.
[00:17:39]  Well, I already went to prison.
[00:17:41]  It was 15 years ago.
[00:17:42]  And he cried every day in prison because I heard him so.
[00:17:45]  You know, but it's like the guy that goes to Publix every day and steals tweet.
[00:17:51]  Man, after a couple of years, he's going to ask you, listen, you want to barbecue something?
[00:17:55]  Yeah, let me go to Publix and get some steaks.
[00:17:57]  That's what he does for a living.
[00:17:58]  He steals shit.
[00:18:00]  That's what I did.
[00:18:01]  So to me, it was normal.
[00:18:03]  Yeah, you had become numb to it by that point.
[00:18:06]  Listen, I remember I had an employee.
[00:18:08]  She called me one day.
[00:18:08]  She's like, oh my God, they're asking me to fill out these forms.
[00:18:11]  And I said, have you ever lied in your life?
[00:18:13]  She said, yeah.
[00:18:14]  I said, well, I want you to lie like you have never lied before.
[00:18:19]  And she's like, For real?
[00:18:20]  I said, yes.
[00:18:21]  That property, that condo is 100% occupied.
[00:18:25]  And it was like 40% occupied.
[00:18:27]  She's like, what's going to happen when they find out?
[00:18:28]  I said, I got it.
[00:18:30]  Don't worry about it.
[00:18:31]  You just write it up.
[00:18:32]  So I developed this culture of people trusting me.
[00:18:36]  Like, okay, he's got it.
[00:18:38]  He's got it.
[00:18:39]  How do you sleep at night?
[00:18:40]  Well, I'll tell you what.
[00:18:42]  It worked.
[00:18:42]  Just like you.
[00:18:43]  You know what?
[00:18:43]  You know what happened?
[00:18:45]  It worked against me.
[00:18:46]  I had a $2,000 post-opedic.
[00:18:48]  When the feds went around and they asked all of them, so who told you to do this?
[00:18:53]  He did.
[00:18:55]  He said to trust him.
[00:18:56]  So, yeah.
[00:18:58]  Needless to say, I got leadership role and, you know, I ended up getting 15 years.
[00:19:04]  After the feds are on you, how did it play?
[00:19:06]  How did that roll out?
[00:19:07]  So the feds knock on my door in 2007.
[00:19:09]  Wait a second.
[00:19:11]  Wait a second.
[00:19:12]  So you're saying all the money that came for this complex was from Americans?
[00:19:21]  Well, I had some foreign investors.
[00:19:26]  Some really good foreign investors.

=== The Federal Investigation Begins (13:48) ===

[00:19:28]  Because at this point, there is a point when the apartments are not closing.
[00:19:31]  Yeah, the bank's not lending money anymore.
[00:19:33]  Banks are not lending money, and I'm desperate.
[00:19:35]  And these clients walk through the door, and they're from my motherland, from the mothership.
[00:19:41]  And they come to me and they say, Listen, can we buy cash?
[00:19:46]  And I said, I mean, like American cash?
[00:19:50]  They're like, Yeah.
[00:19:50]  How do you know these guys?
[00:19:52]  They're friends of yours just from when you lived.
[00:19:53]  I mean, you moved out of there when you were 16.
[00:19:55]  Yeah, they actually came.
[00:19:56]  Refer from a salesperson.
[00:19:57]  Okay, and the salesperson is like, listen, I don't know how to deal with these guys.
[00:20:00]  You want to, you want to talk to them.
[00:20:01]  And I say yeah.
[00:20:01]  So I talked to them and I said, listen yeah, you come, you can buy cash.
[00:20:05]  They said okay, we want.
[00:20:07]  It was about, you know, two apartments for this guy and two apartments for this guy and two apartments for this guy.
[00:20:12]  And i'm like, and you're gonna close cash and they're like yeah, I said perfect, fantastic.
[00:20:16]  So these guys are putting money into this property and his friend is buying two and this other friend is buying two, and it's all cash money, all from Venezuela.
[00:20:23]  I'm sitting there going no problem, and you're gonna lease out the properties or, And they're going to make tons of money.
[00:20:27]  And guess what?
[00:20:28]  The property is going to go up in value.
[00:20:29]  You hold on to this baby, the property is going to go up in value.
[00:20:32]  Okay?
[00:20:33]  So the property starts going down in value.
[00:20:36]  And that's a whole different story.
[00:20:38]  And I'll get into that.
[00:20:39]  And these guys that are buying cash are calling me over and going, all right, man, we're ready to, you know, to pull out.
[00:20:46]  We're ready to get the money out.
[00:20:48]  And I'm like, well, you know, we may have a problem.
[00:20:51]  What?
[00:20:52]  Yeah.
[00:20:52]  I said, well, I don't know if you heard the news, but the market crashed, bro.
[00:20:55]  The money's gone.
[00:20:56]  And they were like, what do you mean gone?
[00:20:59]  I said, well, like, remember that $200,000 apartment?
[00:21:03]  It's about $40,000 right now.
[00:21:05]  So if you want to sell it, I can get you a buyer for $40,000, but your guys are not going to be happy.
[00:21:10]  So that's when I started finding out that these guys worked for the Venezuelan government.
[00:21:16]  And they were like, well, this is what's going to happen.
[00:21:18]  If we don't get our money back, we're going to kill you and we're going to kill all your family.
[00:21:21]  And we have a lot of people that you also scammed and they want us to kill you anyways.
[00:21:27]  So listen, it's no problem.
[00:21:30]  And we are the government.
[00:21:31]  And I remember one of the guys said to me once, they said, do you know what a red flag on the Interpol is?
[00:21:36]  And I'm like, no.
[00:21:37]  He goes, well, it's when the Interpol is looking for you and we can make that happen.
[00:21:42]  And I was like, oh, well, I guess it sucks to be me then.
[00:21:45]  I had one of those, so I know what it was.
[00:21:47]  Well, I later ended up getting in the indictment of the director of Interpol, so they could have made that happen.
[00:21:53]  You know?
[00:21:56]  So I have this issue, and then I have the feds knocking on my door, and they come to me and they say, listen, we want you to come down to Fort Lauderdale and talk to us.
[00:22:04]  I go down there, I hire an attorney, and he says, let's go.
[00:22:09]  Let's see what they have.
[00:22:10]  So I sit down, and there is like the prosecutor is right there, and two agents are sitting there, and they say, well, we're going to make this very simple.
[00:22:17]  They showed me all my deals and they said, what do you know about this?
[00:22:21]  And I said, what do you mean?
[00:22:24]  And he said, what do you know about these transactions?
[00:22:26]  They said, and I said, listen, I don't know the buyers.
[00:22:31]  I mean, people bought apartments.
[00:22:32]  I don't know what you want.
[00:22:34]  The prosecutor looked at me and said, that's your answer?
[00:22:37]  I said, yeah.
[00:22:38]  And he said, okay, I'm going to see you again.
[00:22:41]  I gave you a chance.
[00:22:42]  And he walked away.
[00:22:44]  And my attorney looked at me and said, they don't have anything on your ground.
[00:22:50]  And I said, so we're good?
[00:22:51]  He's like, we're good.
[00:22:54]  Perfect.
[00:22:55]  I paid the guy.
[00:22:56]  He walked away.
[00:22:57]  I walked away.
[00:22:57]  That was 2007.
[00:23:01]  Four and a half years later, I got arrested in New York.
[00:23:05]  The market crashed.
[00:23:06]  These guys want to kill me.
[00:23:09]  It's a story that we're going to go in a second because it blows up.
[00:23:12]  And I'm like, listen, I can't do this anymore.
[00:23:14]  I need to hide.
[00:23:15]  I need to hide from the Venezuelans and I need to hide from the Americans and I need to hide from everybody.
[00:23:19]  I need to go to the only place that I can hide.
[00:23:22]  And that place is called New York City.
[00:23:24]  Why New York City?
[00:23:25]  Dude, because in New York, you don't have a car.
[00:23:28]  Nobody asks for your driver license.
[00:23:30]  You don't have a phone.
[00:23:31]  I don't have anything.
[00:23:33]  My apartment wasn't somebody else's name.
[00:23:35]  So I'm living the life in New York.
[00:23:38]  Nobody knows me.
[00:23:38]  I had a friend of mine after your podcast.
[00:23:41]  She called me.
[00:23:41]  She's like, did you do all those bad things?
[00:23:45]  And I said, well, some, yeah.
[00:23:48]  And she goes, so who's the one that we met in New York?
[00:23:52]  I said, listen.
[00:23:53]  The one that you met in New York was the New York one.
[00:23:55]  Yeah, and that's the beauty of New York You can go there and be anybody you want you know a rock star an artist anybody So chronologically before you got arrested Yeah, oh, okay.
[00:24:08]  All right, yeah, change the change the battery.
[00:24:10]  Sorry, we got that this camera We have to change batteries every like 30 minutes.
[00:24:13]  Oh, really Chronologically you just jumped four years Well, nothing happened.
[00:24:19]  It was fucking four years.
[00:24:20]  What are you talking about?
[00:24:21]  That you went back to Venezuela.
[00:24:24]  But I got to get back to Venezuela when I get to that story in prison.
[00:24:28]  When they start asking me, what did you do?
[00:24:30]  Yeah, but that's not chronologically.
[00:24:32]  Chronologically, during that.
[00:24:34]  Yeah, don't do it, bro.
[00:24:35]  That's what confuses people.
[00:24:36]  You're like, when this came up, but that's not when you went back.
[00:24:40]  Got it.
[00:24:41]  Got it.
[00:24:42]  Right.
[00:24:44]  Because otherwise, you confuse people.
[00:24:45]  I don't understand.
[00:24:46]  So he was arrested, and then they let him out, and he went to.
[00:24:49]  People are stupid.
[00:24:51]  So you have to go step by step.
[00:24:55]  All right.
[00:24:55]  So, Matt, what were you saying?
[00:24:57]  Chronologically, what?
[00:24:58]  I'm saying he just jumped four years, but chronologically, he just, he's like, yeah.
[00:25:01]  So he was going to say.
[00:25:02]  When he went to New York.
[00:25:03]  Yeah.
[00:25:03]  You're jumping ahead of the Venezuelan.
[00:25:05]  Yeah.
[00:25:05]  The question that a lot of people have is why were you running away from the Venezuelans?
[00:25:10]  Right.
[00:25:11]  Well, from.
[00:25:11]  Well, they were threatening to kill you.
[00:25:13]  That's a good reason.
[00:25:14]  They got really aggressive because they started telling me, listen, we know where your family lives in Venezuela, and all my family lives down there.
[00:25:20]  And they said, we're going to kill them.
[00:25:22]  We're going to kill them all.
[00:25:23]  Well, my husband, how close were you?
[00:25:26]  To what?
[00:25:26]  Your family.
[00:25:28]  Well, there are some people that I like, but I mean, it's a lot of money.
[00:25:33]  Like, I can get another cousin.
[00:25:36]  Well, you know what's crazy?
[00:25:37]  After I did my time, all my family is like, yeah, man, he ruined our lives.
[00:25:41]  Now we cannot go anywhere.
[00:25:42]  And I'm like, first of all, you weren't going anywhere anyways.
[00:25:44]  And second of all, nobody went after you.
[00:25:46]  They were after me, you know?
[00:25:48]  So during that time, I have these guys calling me and calling me.
[00:25:52]  And listen, we need the money.
[00:25:53]  We need the money.
[00:25:55]  So at one point, they go, you need to come to Venezuela and face us, bro.
[00:25:59]  you need to come here we want to see you we want to look at you in the eye and you have to tell us that you lost our money and i'm like i gotta do this so i'm dating a girl that time and i tell her listen i'm gonna go to venezuela and uh i'm gonna cut this is about 2000.
[00:26:17]  i want to say like 2008 i'm gonna go there and i'm gonna call you as soon as i land if i don't call you they kill me all right she's all right all right so i show up in venezuela i have a couple guys from the military they used to escort me out of the plane Like they will open the plane and two military guys will come in and go to the air attendant, like the flight attendant, like, and I'll be sitting there and they'll be like, boom!
[00:26:41]  Juan Sanchez, can you please come to us?
[00:26:44]  They were ready for you.
[00:26:44]  So they will come in and they will escort me out.
[00:26:46]  And I kept telling them, dude, don't do that.
[00:26:48]  I can't go, no, no, no, because, you know, we don't want you to go through costumes and we want to make sure, you know.
[00:26:53]  I'm like, dude, I don't come with anything.
[00:26:57]  So I go there.
[00:26:58]  The guys looked at me.
[00:27:00]  They said, man, you're in deep shit.
[00:27:02]  You need to give us our money.
[00:27:04]  And we're going to hold you here until we get the money.
[00:27:06]  I said, dude.
[00:27:07]  If you hold me here, I cannot get you your money.
[00:27:09]  I need to be in the States.
[00:27:10]  That's where I make the money.
[00:27:13]  They said, Well, you're going to have to figure out.
[00:27:15]  You're going to have to call from here.
[00:27:16]  You're going to have to figure out, but we're not letting you out.
[00:27:19]  So they locked me in a hotel room in Caracas.
[00:27:23]  And they have these guys watching me.
[00:27:25]  And they're partying and they're calling these sloppy hookers that are going to their room and they're getting wasted and drinking.
[00:27:30]  And I'm like, Oh my God, man, I can't do this stuff.
[00:27:33]  Who are the guys?
[00:27:34]  Military?
[00:27:36]  I don't know.
[00:27:37]  Well, I don't want to say military because in the United States, you say military.
[00:27:41]  And it's the guy with a uniform and a shape.
[00:27:44]  In Venezuela, when you say military, it's the guy with a big belly and he hasn't fired a gun in like 10 years.
[00:27:50]  So they could have been military.
[00:27:51]  They could have been farmers.
[00:27:52]  Right.
[00:27:53]  And so they're there and they're with these horrible hookers.
[00:27:57]  And they're like, hey, listen, you want to come here?
[00:27:59]  I'm like, no, no, I'm good.
[00:28:00]  Thank you, man.
[00:28:01]  So I'm trying to figure out, man, what to do, what to do.
[00:28:03]  So I'm talking to the big guys the following day because they're doing this every night.
[00:28:08]  And I'm trying to tell them, listen, the only way that I can recover your money is if you give me more money.
[00:28:16]  Because it takes money to make money.
[00:28:18]  So, what I got to do is I have to buy all these apartments that are now 40,000 and we're going to hold them until they go up again.
[00:28:26]  And then we're kind of like evening out your losses, kind of like what people do right now with Bitcoin.
[00:28:31]  You know, just keep buying.
[00:28:33]  As it's going down, just keep buying.
[00:28:34]  Buy the dip.
[00:28:35]  Yeah.
[00:28:35]  So I said, man, this is what we're going to do.
[00:28:36]  We're going to buy a bunch of those apartments at 40,000.
[00:28:39]  And then, listen, I sold them to you at 300,000.
[00:28:42]  I can sell them again at 300,000.
[00:28:43]  Man, you'll make a bunch of money.
[00:28:47]  They go, well, you know, we'll think about it.
[00:28:51]  Man, I see that things are not happening.
[00:28:52]  So I call this girl, Michelle, one day that these guys are drunk, the guys that are watching over me.
[00:28:56]  And I say, babe, you need to get me on a plane.
[00:28:58]  I need to get the fuck out of here.
[00:28:59]  These guys are going to kill me.
[00:29:00]  They're not buying this whole, it takes money to make money thing.
[00:29:02]  I got to get out of here.
[00:29:04]  So get me on the first plane out of here.
[00:29:06]  I'm going to try to, you know, get my passport and I'm going to get out of this room.
[00:29:10]  So I pick up my passport.
[00:29:12]  I get out of the room.
[00:29:13]  I go to the lobby and I'm like running.
[00:29:14]  I'm telling the guy in the lobby, get me a cab to the airport.
[00:29:16]  Get me a cab to the airport.
[00:29:17]  She buys a first class ticket for like $1,500 one way from Caracas to Miami.
[00:29:23]  She tells me, listen, as soon as you get there, There is, you go to the counter, give them your name.
[00:29:27]  They're waiting for you.
[00:29:29]  I said, well, I'm going to call you when we're taking off.
[00:29:31]  If I don't call you, they cut up to me and they kill me.
[00:29:35]  So I get on the plane.
[00:29:37]  I land in Miami.
[00:29:38]  They start calling me.
[00:29:39]  Man, what the fuck?
[00:29:41]  I'm like, listen, bro.
[00:29:42]  I need to be in the United States.
[00:29:44]  I cannot recover your money, guys.
[00:29:46]  I need your name.
[00:29:47]  Listen, I need to work it here.
[00:29:50]  Okay.
[00:29:51]  Well, this is what we're going to do.
[00:29:54]  We're going to give you the money.
[00:29:56]  But we need you to do some things for us.
[00:30:01]  I said, all right, what's it going to be?
[00:30:03]  We need you to buy some cars and we need you to buy some diapers and some Converse shoes and a couple of cell phones and an Xbox.
[00:30:10]  And I'm like, all right.
[00:30:14]  He's like, yeah, just give us a number.
[00:30:15]  And I'm like, well, you know, the two cars and the Xbox and the diapers and the stuff.
[00:30:19]  Yeah, I don't know, man, 120,000.
[00:30:21]  All right.
[00:30:22]  So they will wire me this money and I will do all these things.
[00:30:26]  But it gets annoying.
[00:30:26]  I mean, there was a point that these guys will call me and say, like, hey, listen, we need.
[00:30:30]  2000 pairs of Levi's jeans, and I'll be like, dude, I don't have time for that, bro.
[00:30:35]  I'm trying to like make a living here, yeah.
[00:30:37]  So, like, you're like, they have you grocery shopping for them, yeah.
[00:30:39]  And they'll be like, well, if you don't give us the Levi's jeans, we're gonna kill your family.
[00:30:42]  I'm like, Jesus Christ, bro, you're kidding me.
[00:30:45]  So, this keeps going on and on and on.
[00:30:48]  Then, at one point, I said, listen, I can't do this anymore, dude.
[00:30:51]  I can't do this anymore, bro.
[00:30:52]  I mean, I keep losing your money, and I cannot continue asking you for money because this, this hole is getting a little too deep.
[00:31:00]  And they sent me a video, so they're like, okay, listen.
[00:31:03]  You don't want to work with us?
[00:31:04]  You don't want to do what we tell you to do?
[00:31:07]  You'll see.
[00:31:08]  So they sent me this video, and the subject says, this is what's going to happen to you.
[00:31:14]  And I opened the video.
[00:31:15]  I only watched like probably like 10 seconds of the video because it's like, listen.
[00:31:21]  I think you should have it here in concrete.
[00:31:23]  I'll find it.
[00:31:23]  You guys will play it.
[00:31:24]  Is it online?
[00:31:26]  I could find it somewhere.
[00:31:28]  Is it on YouTube?
[00:31:30]  Yeah, I doubt.
[00:31:32]  Maybe on Matt's true crime.
[00:31:34]  Listen to what the video is.
[00:31:35]  So they go to this prison.
[00:31:37]  And they pay these inmates to make a circle and grab one of the inmates and take turns raping him and a guy's filming this on a phone.
[00:31:47]  And then they're yelling like oh, this is what's gonna happen to you.
[00:31:49]  And they're raping him, one after the other, one after the other one.
[00:31:51]  Of course, you know, I mean, it's not something that you grab popcorn.
[00:31:54]  You're like, let me see how this ends.
[00:31:56]  I watched like 10 seconds and i'm like, oh my god, I can see this.
[00:32:00]  You know that was one of the videos.
[00:32:02]  Then they sent me another video, like two months later, of a guy that is just driving on a motorcycle.
[00:32:06]  He goes into a barber shop and goes to a guy and boom boom boom boom, just shots him And then they're like, This is what's gonna happen to you.
[00:32:12]  And I'm like, dude, you got to stop killing people just to send me a message, you know?
[00:32:17]  I mean, you can just tell me I'm going to kill you.
[00:32:19]  And it's pretty scary.
[00:32:20]  What happened to the inmate?
[00:32:21]  Did the inmate get killed too?
[00:32:22]  Well, I never watched the whole thing, but the feds did.
[00:32:27]  And at some point, I'm talking to the feds.
[00:32:29]  And they tell me, listen, we're going to show you the video.
[00:32:32]  You need to identify it.
[00:32:33]  I said, I only seen like 10 seconds of the video.
[00:32:37]  They said, okay, if you see the first 10 seconds, will you recognize it?
[00:32:40]  I said, I think I cannot miss it.
[00:32:42]  Yeah.
[00:32:43]  So they show me the first 10 seconds, and sure enough, it's a circle, and I'm like, Yeah, dude, that's a video.
[00:32:48]  So there are three agents there, and the prosecutor.
[00:32:51]  And I said, You guys watched that video?
[00:32:54]  And the prosecutor goes, No, no, no, no.
[00:32:56]  And then I asked the agents, Did you guys watch it?
[00:32:59]  And one of the agents goes, Oh, I watched.
[00:33:01]  And I said, How does it end?
[00:33:04]  They said, Well, it's not a love story.
[00:33:06]  I mean, are the credits, like these movies dedicated to the memory of.
[00:33:10]  Yeah.
[00:33:11]  Well, I guess they kill this guy, and they chop him into pieces.
[00:33:15]  Well, there's a.

=== Arrest Warrant Served at Home (02:11) ===

[00:33:16]  Who I want to meet is the guy that is on the phone, like, move to the side.
[00:33:20]  All right.
[00:33:21]  All right.
[00:33:21]  There you go.
[00:33:21]  Keep going.
[00:33:22]  So they're filming this thing.
[00:33:25]  Venezuela has one of the prisons.
[00:33:27]  There's a prison in Venezuela that's the most violent prison in the world.
[00:33:31]  It's got the most murders.
[00:33:32]  It's like every day there's a murder.
[00:33:35]  So, of course, I'm sitting here.
[00:33:36]  I cannot tell my family this stuff.
[00:33:39]  I'm stressing the fuck out.
[00:33:40]  That's when I said, I'm going to New York.
[00:33:42]  I got to disappear.
[00:33:43]  I got to go.
[00:33:45]  So I pack my stuff and I go to New York and I become an art salesman and I start selling.
[00:33:51]  photographs for a photographer called Peter Lick.
[00:33:53]  I don't know if you guys heard him.
[00:33:55]  Yeah, I don't know.
[00:33:56]  That sounds familiar.
[00:33:56]  Yeah, he sells, he's the Matt Cox of photography.
[00:34:00]  Oh, yeah.
[00:34:01]  And the guy's brilliant, brilliant.
[00:34:03]  And I start making a bunch of money and I start living, you know, a good life in New York and real estate is behind me.
[00:34:10]  But you're always on the run.
[00:34:11]  And when you're on the run, man, you know, you know they're going to come for you.
[00:34:16]  So 2012 comes around.
[00:34:18]  It's almost five years.
[00:34:20]  And I'm thinking in six more months, these guys cannot get me.
[00:34:26]  Because back in those days, it was five years, the stature of limitation.
[00:34:28]  Now they increased it to 10 years.
[00:34:31]  And I said, they cannot get me.
[00:34:33]  And sure enough, April 30th, I was dating this girl.
[00:34:40]  We had a fight on April 29th, on Sunday.
[00:34:43]  And I called her on Monday and I said, man, I'm going to take the day off.
[00:34:47]  Why don't you come to my house, babe?
[00:34:48]  And we get some sushi and, you know, we make out, we do our thing.
[00:34:52]  All right, all right.
[00:34:53]  Man, and I'm like planning everything.
[00:34:54]  I have like the tables ready.
[00:34:55]  I make my bed, you know, I wash the sheets.
[00:34:58]  I'm like ready.
[00:35:00]  And she comes in, looks beautiful.
[00:35:01]  She knocks the door.
[00:35:02]  I kiss her.
[00:35:03]  I'm like, listen, I got some sushi coming.
[00:35:05]  So she sits on the couch and door, you know, I hear a knock on the door.
[00:35:10]  I open.
[00:35:11]  There is the delivery guy, you know, gives me the sushi.
[00:35:14]  I pay him.
[00:35:15]  He leaves.
[00:35:16]  And then I hear, and I'm like, man, who's banging the door like that?
[00:35:20]  So I tell my girlfriend, listen, what's wrong with this Chinese guy?
[00:35:25]  I think I gave him a tip.

=== El Chapo Connection Revealed (14:52) ===

[00:35:27]  I said, watch, check this out.
[00:35:30]  I opened the door.
[00:35:31]  What?
[00:35:31]  Ready to get on this guy.
[00:35:33]  And I get two hands pull me like this and pull me out of the apartment.
[00:35:37]  And there is like a line of cops up the stairs, a line of cops down the stairs, and they're all like pointing guns at me and El Chapo Guzman, you know?
[00:35:46]  And there's this guy with a picture of me, and he goes, You're Juan Sanchez, right?
[00:35:50]  I said, Yeah.
[00:35:51]  He goes, You're getting extradited to Florida.
[00:35:53]  We have a warrant for your arrest.
[00:35:56]  And then the agent that had interviewed me four and a half years before comes around and he goes, You thought I wasn't going to get you, right?
[00:36:05]  And I said, nah, nah, I knew you would.
[00:36:07]  The guy that walked out of the room?
[00:36:09]  Yeah.
[00:36:09]  And I said, all right, all right.
[00:36:11]  So they sat me in, I told him to let her go, and then the guy said, you have drugs?
[00:36:16]  And I said, no.
[00:36:17]  You have guns?
[00:36:18]  And I said, no.
[00:36:20]  He said, all right, let's go.
[00:36:22]  So they took me to Brooklyn Detention Center, and that's how my journey started.
[00:36:25]  Jesus Christ.
[00:36:27]  I know, but I don't know if they did this to you, but I had this agent sitting next to me as we're driving, and the guy's telling me, like, we're going to give you 30 years.
[00:36:34]  You're never going to see the light.
[00:36:35]  We're going to fuck you over.
[00:36:37]  Your life is, and I'm sitting there going, really, man?
[00:36:39]  I mean.
[00:36:40]  How old were you at that point?
[00:36:42]  I was 38.
[00:36:43]  38.
[00:36:43]  I was 38.
[00:36:45]  So, you know, I went.
[00:36:47]  Prison is a different world.
[00:36:49]  And I think everybody goes through the same thing.
[00:36:50]  It's just nobody has the balls to say it.
[00:36:53]  But I always, like, when the new people came to prison, I always told them, you just arrived?
[00:36:56]  Yeah.
[00:36:57]  Okay.
[00:36:57]  Your first year is your suicidal year.
[00:37:00]  Every day you wake up trying to figure out how you're going to kill yourself.
[00:37:04]  And you, like, plan it out.
[00:37:06]  And you are like, okay, let me see.
[00:37:07]  I can always take the blades and, yeah, but that shit doesn't work because I've seen these guys do it.
[00:37:12]  By the way, if you slice your wrist and you don't die, they take 54 days of good time.
[00:37:16]  So you have to do more self-mutilation.
[00:37:18]  You have to do more time.
[00:37:20]  It's like you tried to kill yourself yeah, and you weren't successful.
[00:37:22]  No, all right now you got to do more time.
[00:37:25]  So I was like okay, I could hang myself, but that's like a slow death.
[00:37:28]  Then I learned through the inmate that it's not.
[00:37:30]  It's like they.
[00:37:31]  They got it down packed and I was like well, maybe I can take some pills and that's the.
[00:37:36]  That's the one year where you still think your girl is gonna wait for you and everybody's gonna wait for you.
[00:37:40]  And you're calling her and you're like, you know, and it's even I don't know who you interview here but the toughest gangsters, Killers, hardcore killers.
[00:37:51]  Matt will tell you on the phone, baby, I can't do this without you.
[00:37:55]  Then they'll hang up and they say, fucking bitch, man.
[00:37:58]  Or worse, on Saturday morning, they're calling, why didn't you answer the phone last night?
[00:38:04]  The fuck were you doing?
[00:38:05]  Yeah, that's the way to keep her.
[00:38:07]  By the way, what is the show that they play on Saturday mornings?
[00:38:12]  Oh, the infomercial?
[00:38:13]  No, Cheaters.
[00:38:14]  Oh, Cheaters.
[00:38:15]  Cheaters.
[00:38:16]  You go to the TV room, everybody's watching Cheaters.
[00:38:19]  Show is over, everybody goes to the phone.
[00:38:21]  Yeah.
[00:38:21]  Where were you yesterday?
[00:38:22]  Oh, my God.
[00:38:23]  That's sad.
[00:38:24]  That's sad.
[00:38:25]  I know, it's horrendous.
[00:38:26]  So, you go through your suicidal year, and then, you know, whoever's going to leave you is going to leave you.
[00:38:30]  Whoever's going to stay is going to stay.
[00:38:33]  And, you know, that's kind of how I would it out.
[00:38:35]  Actually, the family that I was protecting, most of them left.
[00:38:38]  I should have told these guys, you know what?
[00:38:39]  Kill them.
[00:38:39]  Fuck them.
[00:38:40]  Yeah.
[00:38:41]  Let me get a life insurance policy.
[00:38:43]  They're not going to be there for me, so fuck them.
[00:38:45]  You know, I'll give you their address.
[00:38:48]  But I got, so I get to Florida.
[00:38:50]  Mm hmm.
[00:38:51]  And how long did it take for you to get to Florida?
[00:38:53]  Took me about three months.
[00:38:54]  They do what's called diesel therapy.
[00:38:56]  So they kind of drive you around the prisons.
[00:38:58]  You know, they took me to Oklahoma, Atlanta, Tallahassee, and I finally made it to Miami.
[00:39:03]  And I get to Miami, and my family's like, hey, we got you an attorney.
[00:39:08]  And I said, all right.
[00:39:08]  So I meet the attorney.
[00:39:09]  And dude, if you think I have an accent, my attorney was like Ricky Ricardo.
[00:39:14]  He's like, welcome.
[00:39:16]  I'm your attorney, and I'm going to it.
[00:39:18]  And I'm like, what the fuck?
[00:39:19]  So I call my family, and I'm like, dude, why did you guys hire this attorney?
[00:39:24]  He goes, well, he speaks Spanish.
[00:39:26]  I said, yeah, but I speak English.
[00:39:28]  Yeah, but some of us don't.
[00:39:29]  So we want to know what the attorney's saying.
[00:39:31]  So you said that you hired him for you.
[00:39:32]  I said, dude, I think I want the judge to know what the attorney's saying.
[00:39:36]  Yeah, exactly.
[00:39:37]  So that's my attorney, and he will come see me every now and then, and he'd be like, hey, Juan, no te preocupe.
[00:39:43]  No te preocupe.
[00:39:43]  Don't worry.
[00:39:44]  Don't worry.
[00:39:45]  All good.
[00:39:46]  And I would say, like, how much time am I looking at?
[00:39:49]  Five years.
[00:39:51]  I was like, five years?
[00:39:53]  Five years.
[00:39:54]  I was like, all right.
[00:39:55]  I can do five.
[00:39:56]  Five is no problem.
[00:39:57]  Yeah, five years, five years.
[00:39:59]  He comes to me.
[00:39:59]  He goes, all right, the feds give you this 18 years.
[00:40:05]  I said, dude, what the fuck?
[00:40:06]  What happened with the five years?
[00:40:08]  He goes, it's not over.
[00:40:09]  It's not over.
[00:40:10]  We need you to sign this as a sign of good faith.
[00:40:14]  And I said, I didn't know that.
[00:40:15]  Yeah, bro.
[00:40:16]  Fucking cocksucker.
[00:40:17]  And I said, why would I sign this as a sign of good faith?
[00:40:19]  Because it shows that you are, you know, that you're willing to work with them.
[00:40:22]  I said, I took the pen, man.
[00:40:25]  And I remember I was crying.
[00:40:26]  And I said, listen, man, I'm signing my life.
[00:40:28]  I have two kids, probably older than you two.
[00:40:31]  That attorney doesn't care.
[00:40:32]  And I said, man, I'm signing my life away.
[00:40:34]  So I signed my 18 years.
[00:40:37]  Sure enough, I go to my 18 years, bro.
[00:40:40]  18 years?
[00:40:41]  Like that song.
[00:40:42]  And, uh, I get sentenced 15 years.
[00:40:45]  Oh, it's a bargain.
[00:40:46]  Yeah.
[00:40:47]  So he's like, don't worry.
[00:40:49]  I have a defense for you.
[00:40:50]  I have a good argument for you.
[00:40:51]  I said, all right.
[00:40:53]  So we go in front of the judge, and the prosecutor gets up and he's like, listen, this guy's a piece of shit.
[00:40:57]  He ran away to New York, and whoa, And listen, he's just, we have to lock him up.
[00:41:04]  I said, well, my attorney's going to get up and he's going to pull some kind of, you know, the Chewbacca defense, like South Park.
[00:41:09]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:41:11]  And he gets up and he goes, My client is a good person, he's a good father, he's a good citizen.
[00:41:18]  We think 18 years is too much.
[00:41:22]  I said, Dude, that's it.
[00:41:24]  He goes, Yeah, I said.
[00:41:27]  The judge goes, Do you want to say something?
[00:41:28]  I'm like, Yeah, so I got up and I started talking to him.
[00:41:32]  And the judge said, Man, listen, I'm not gonna give you 18 years, but I'm not gonna give you five years.
[00:41:39]  He said, I'm gonna give you 15 years, 180 months.
[00:41:43]  And my attorney goes, We didn't do that bad.
[00:41:47]  I said, We didn't do that, buddy.
[00:41:50]  We, we, yeah.
[00:41:51]  I said, dude, I'm gonna do 15 years.
[00:41:54]  He goes, I'll come see you tomorrow.
[00:41:55]  Well, he never came to see me again, so I go to my prison.
[00:41:59]  You know, I go, I hate this guy, yeah.
[00:42:01]  My family paid him like $50,000, and it was the money that I had left, like in case of emergency, break the glass kind of thing, because the feds had taken everything, you know.
[00:42:13]  Oh, listen, who's scamming who here?
[00:42:14]  License to steal, it's horrendous.
[00:42:16]  It is a license, like being an attorney.
[00:42:19]  License to steal.
[00:42:21]  You get people, they're most vulnerable.
[00:42:23]  They believe everything you say, and they can blatantly just lie to you.
[00:42:27]  And they know once you sign that document, you're done.
[00:42:31]  They're going to take you away, and you'll be filing paperwork.
[00:42:34]  But in the end, there's nothing you can do.
[00:42:38]  And I have your money, and I don't even have to answer your calls anymore.
[00:42:40]  It's horrible.
[00:42:40]  Do you ever think about what would have happened if you wouldn't have signed that document?
[00:42:43]  Oh my God, I know what would have happened if I wouldn't have signed that document.
[00:42:46]  I would have gotten like seven years.
[00:42:48]  I wouldn't have gotten five.
[00:42:49]  But it's not, listen, it's not over.
[00:42:50]  How would that have worked?
[00:42:51]  It's not over.
[00:42:51]  Well, so I go to prison.
[00:42:53]  With my 15 years, you know meets me meet Matt Cox the rep the rep of the fraudsters the highlight of his of his entire his entire bid Yeah, it was a long time, but I met Matt I have a friend of mine and Okay, so so his girlfriend claims that he has a man crush on me But I have a friend of mine who says that I have a man crush on him So when I come here, she's like oh, yeah, look at you.
[00:43:21]  You're gonna dress up because you're gonna go to mats, he mad.
[00:43:23]  And I'm like, listen, you know, I have a lot of professional respect for Matt.
[00:43:29]  And she goes dude, he's a criminal and so are you.
[00:43:33]  That's not a profession.
[00:43:34]  And I said, but among the profession it is.
[00:43:37]  She's an attorney too, by the way.
[00:43:39]  She's an attorney, by the way.
[00:43:39]  Yeah nice, I said, among the profession there is levels.
[00:43:43]  You know, it's like the drug business.
[00:43:45]  You know the, the guy that sells crack in the corner, is not.
[00:43:48]  It's not the same as El Chapo.
[00:43:49]  You know, Matt is El Chapo Of Mortgage.
[00:43:52]  Wow, I hope that hot.
[00:43:54]  That went.
[00:43:54]  The El Chapo Of Mortgage.
[00:43:56]  I hope that catches on.
[00:43:57]  I want to see that in the comment section.
[00:43:59]  That's going to be the title.
[00:43:59]  That's going to be the title.
[00:44:01]  El Chapo de Mortgage.
[00:44:02]  Except we're going to put it on you.
[00:44:03]  We're going to put it on you, bro.
[00:44:05]  Nice.
[00:44:05]  And that's how you get a leadership role in an indictment, fellas.
[00:44:08]  Two points.
[00:44:10]  So I go to Coleman and then I get this one day somebody tells me listen you are packing out you're going to Miami and everybody's like oh dude you are gonna get another indictment you're gonna get superseded more time and I'm like shit so I get down to Miami and They said listen we have some people that are talking about you.
[00:44:29]  Can I can I say something first?
[00:44:31]  Yeah, so I remember when we met and he said he had had 15 years and I was like I was like, bro, I mean, is there anything you can do about that?
[00:44:41]  Like, I mean, tell me you cooperated.
[00:44:43]  Tell me you're working on that.
[00:44:44]  And he's like, no, I don't know.
[00:44:46]  I mean, you know, he's not really sure what to do.
[00:44:49]  He's like, I don't know.
[00:44:50]  And I'm going, you need to do something.
[00:44:53]  Like, I'm saying, do the right thing.
[00:44:55]  You need to work on, like, no, my attorney, your attorney sold you out.
[00:45:00]  Like, I have, you know, prior to dealing with attorneys, you hold them like really high regard.
[00:45:06]  After going through the feds and dealing with, Four or five different attorneys that I've had, bottom the barrel.
[00:45:14]  I have way more respect for drug dealers than I do attorneys.
[00:45:19]  There is no ethics.
[00:45:21]  He also had a little issue with the fact that I had 15 years.
[00:45:25]  Oh, yeah.
[00:45:25]  And 39 million.
[00:45:26]  On my restitution, I owe the federal government $33.5 million.
[00:45:31]  He got 26 years.
[00:45:31]  And I'm like $6 million.
[00:45:33]  And he owes $6 million.
[00:45:35]  There's no way that's right.
[00:45:36]  So I'm like, listen, dude, I got 39 million and I got to have your time.
[00:45:39]  I'm like, I'm going to have your time too.
[00:45:41]  It's not that people are like, well, you went on the run.
[00:45:42]  He was on the run.
[00:45:44]  He was on the run.
[00:45:45]  I went to New York.
[00:45:47]  That's on the run.
[00:45:49]  I never left the South.
[00:45:51]  So I go down to Miami and they tell me, listen, there are some Venezuelan people talking about you.
[00:45:56]  And I said, In the prison?
[00:45:58]  Were they saying good things?
[00:45:59]  And I'm like, what do you mean?
[00:46:00]  And they're like, well, you know, apparently there is a guy in here and he's saying that he invested a bunch of money in the United States and it all ended in your account.
[00:46:08]  Uh oh.
[00:46:09]  And I'm like, oh, shit.
[00:46:11]  And they're like, listen, you need to get an attorney.
[00:46:14]  And I'm thinking, I'm not calling Ricky Ricardo.
[00:46:16]  I'm going to get like 100 years.
[00:46:18]  I said, fuck.
[00:46:19]  So I talked to my friend Keith and I'm like, Keith, man, I mean, he's like, dude, I did Medicare fraud and I only got like four years and my attorney is like a badass guy.
[00:46:27]  I met him a couple days ago.
[00:46:29]  Super cool guy.
[00:46:30]  His name is Paul Petruzzi.
[00:46:32]  I said, all right, give me his number.
[00:46:33]  So I call Paul and he shows up to the prison and he goes, Juan Sanchez?
[00:46:40]  I said, yeah.
[00:46:40]  He says, I know who you are.
[00:46:43]  I said, because of my fraud case?
[00:46:44]  He goes, no, people are talking about you.
[00:46:48]  I said, really?
[00:46:48]  And he goes, yeah.
[00:46:49]  Do you know anybody in Venezuela?
[00:46:51]  I said, well, I got like family and friends.
[00:46:53]  He goes, no, Hold on one second.
[00:46:57]  He takes me out.
[00:46:58]  He goes to the guard.
[00:47:00]  They bring out a guy that I used to do business with in Venezuela with this whole money thing.
[00:47:06]  And he goes, oh, my God, you are here.
[00:47:09]  And I said, yeah, what are you doing here?
[00:47:11]  He goes, well, I got arrested.
[00:47:14]  And I said, for fraud?
[00:47:15]  And he goes, no, money laundering.
[00:47:18]  And I told him about you.
[00:47:21]  And I said about me, I didn't launder any money, he goes.
[00:47:23]  You didn't.
[00:47:24]  I said no, he goes, but you did, it all falls under money laundering, it all falls on money laundering.
[00:47:30]  And I was like, oh my really.
[00:47:32]  And he goes yeah, and you are the guy that knows where the money ended, so you need to talk.
[00:47:37]  Oh, so this guy tried to use you to get time off his sentence.
[00:47:41]  Of course, everybody's.
[00:47:42]  That's how, that's how the game works.
[00:47:45]  So i'm like, okay.
[00:47:46]  So I talked to the attorney Paul, and Paul's like okay man listen, you know the guys.
[00:47:49]  They're looking for these guys.
[00:47:50]  You are the guy that can do this thing.
[00:47:52]  You got the interview, the emails, you have everything.
[00:47:55]  I said, How much is it?
[00:47:56]  He goes, $45,000.
[00:47:57]  It's 45.
[00:47:58]  Paul wants $45,000 to represent him on a case where he's going to be the main cooperating witness to hope, in the hope that he gets a sentence.
[00:48:08]  I get a sentence without everybody's already.
[00:48:09]  Everybody's already, people are already, are already turning, turning on each other left and right, right.
[00:48:15]  So it's like if you try and stand strong, like well, I'm not going to well, then you just do your time.
[00:48:20]  Yeah, or more, because these guys could set up something where everything oh yeah, he could get re-indicted, yeah.
[00:48:25]  So I'm sitting there going okay, 45,000.
[00:48:27]  I say fuck bro, listen man, I don't have the money.
[00:48:31]  And he goes, you don't.
[00:48:33]  I said no man, he goes, all right, I'll see you in 15 years.
[00:48:37]  I'm like, listen bro wow whoa, whoa.
[00:48:40]  I said I'm a great salesperson, man.
[00:48:43]  I can sell the shit out of your service when I get out.
[00:48:46]  I'll pack your office.
[00:48:48]  He goes, yeah, no.
[00:48:50]  He goes, no, no, I need $45,000.
[00:48:52]  I said, dude, come on, bro.
[00:48:54]  Hook me up.
[00:48:55]  He goes, well, give me 10%.
[00:48:58]  Give me 10,000 and I'll get you started.
[00:49:02]  I said, all right, let me figure it out.
[00:49:03]  So I go upstairs and I tell Keith, bro, your attorney wants $45,000.
[00:49:07]  He goes, okay, pay it.
[00:49:07]  He's worth it.
[00:49:08]  I said, I don't have it, bro.
[00:49:10]  I don't have the $10,000.
[00:49:12]  He goes, well, this is what you need to do.
[00:49:14]  You need to pray.
[00:49:17]  I said, okay, and I'm going to pray.
[00:49:19]  And then tomorrow morning, the 10 grand are going to be on my locker.
[00:49:22]  He goes, maybe.
[00:49:23]  I don't know.
[00:49:25]  I said, all right.
[00:49:26]  I mean, it's.
[00:49:27]  Give it a shot.
[00:49:27]  What the fuck am I going to do?
[00:49:29]  So I go to my cell and I start praying.
[00:49:30]  And I'm like, man, I just, I know I'm not going to get the money, but give me guidance, you know?
[00:49:35]  Man, and the next morning I go, I got it.
[00:49:38]  So I emailed my ex-sister-in-law and I goes, I go, I need you to send me the list of all my Facebook friends.
[00:49:45]  She sends me the list and I start weeding them out.
[00:49:47]  Okay, this guy sucks.
[00:49:47]  This guy sucks.
[00:49:48]  This guy.
[00:49:48]  I scammed this guy.
[00:49:50]  Blah, blah, blah.
[00:49:52]  And I leave like, I don't know, 200 people.
[00:49:55]  And I post.
[00:49:56]  I'm going to send you those posts so you have them.
[00:49:58]  Okay.
[00:49:58]  I post.
[00:49:59]  Are they online right now?
[00:50:00]  Yeah, they're on my Facebook page.
[00:50:01]  Can you pull up Facebook?
[00:50:03]  All right, go ahead.
[00:50:04]  And I posted something in March of 2013.
[00:50:06]  And it says, Dear friends and family, I know you haven't heard from me in a year, but it's because I was indicted and I just got a 15-year sentence.
[00:50:16]  And during this time, I have lost friends.
[00:50:18]  I have lost family.
[00:50:19]  I lost all the money I have.

=== Cooperating with Prosecutors (12:00) ===

[00:50:20]  But I've been holding on to the only thing that I could.
[00:50:24]  And today, I'm surrendering it to you, which is my ego and my dignity.
[00:50:29]  I need to ask you for help.
[00:50:31]  My attorney is $45,000.
[00:50:33]  I need to come up with $10,000.
[00:50:35]  I don't have it.
[00:50:37]  Listen, if you can help me with money, I promise I'll pay you back.
[00:50:40]  If you can't, prayers are welcome.
[00:50:42]  You know, God love you.
[00:50:43]  God bless you, whatever.
[00:50:45]  Dude, that shit went viral.
[00:50:48]  Like people are putting $20 here, $15.
[00:50:51]  I didn't know how crazy it went until actually a couple weeks ago that I'm reading my post and I realized, first of all, I kept a journal in prison and I didn't know because I was posting stuff every week.
[00:51:03]  And second of all, man, people were doing garage sales.
[00:51:06]  Like this weekend is going to be a garage sale for Juan's attorneys.
[00:51:10]  Wow.
[00:51:10]  Yeah.
[00:51:11]  And bake sales.
[00:51:12]  And so Paul comes into the jail and he gets me down one day and he goes, listen, bro, I don't know what the fuck you're doing.
[00:51:18]  But I cannot be getting checks for five and ten and fifteen dollars into the office, man.
[00:51:22]  People are mailing this guy checks.
[00:51:23]  Yeah, so he had to open a PayPal account so people could pay PayPal him fifteen bucks, twenty bucks.
[00:51:28]  And I paid 45 grand on attorney's fees through Facebook, bro.
[00:51:32]  Nice.
[00:51:33]  How long did that take?
[00:51:34]  Couple months, not a lot.
[00:51:36]  That's crazy.
[00:51:36]  And I had guys like organizing it and they had like, we reached the first goal, which is ten thousand dollars.
[00:51:41]  Now we got to go for the other ten.
[00:51:43]  And I had Mindy, my ex-sister-in-law, like you know, organizing stuff.
[00:51:47]  And I had my friend Mario, who's like my brother in Spanish, like, listen, if you're a Spanish donor.
[00:51:52]  Talk to Mario.
[00:51:53]  If you're an American donor, talk to Mindy.
[00:51:54]  And I have this whole thing set up.
[00:51:57]  And they paid my attorney, man.
[00:51:58]  So social media works.
[00:52:00]  It's awesome.
[00:52:02]  And back in those days, there was no Kickstarter or, you know, it was like GoFundMe or whatever.
[00:52:06]  GoFundMe.
[00:52:07]  It was old school.
[00:52:09]  So they pay Paul and Paul starts working on it.
[00:52:12]  And sure enough, the video comes up again.
[00:52:14]  And I said, listen, Paul, they showed me this video.
[00:52:16]  They sent me this video.
[00:52:17]  And he goes, is it on your email?
[00:52:19]  I said, which video?
[00:52:20]  The guy getting chopped up and.
[00:52:22]  In prison, yeah.
[00:52:23]  Yeah, so now the feds are coming to see him.
[00:52:25]  Now the feds, correct.
[00:52:26]  Right, now they're coming to interview him.
[00:52:28]  Paul tells me, I found the guy that is prosecuting these Venezuelans and he wants to talk to you.
[00:52:36]  And I said, okay.
[00:52:36]  He goes, You are a very smart guy.
[00:52:38]  I'm not going to be there because I didn't need to be there because you can't talk your way around this thing.
[00:52:44]  I said, All right, that's fine.
[00:52:46]  He goes, But these are very important people.
[00:52:48]  So the week later, they get me downstairs.
[00:52:51]  I walked into a room and there is a bunch of people in suits.
[00:52:55]  And one of the guys goes, Whatever, whatever, DAA.
[00:52:59]  I'm like, Nice meeting you.
[00:52:59]  And then somebody else goes, Whatever, whatever, FBI.
[00:53:01]  I said, Nice meeting you.
[00:53:02]  And then whatever, whatever, NSA.
[00:53:04]  I said, Nice meeting you.
[00:53:05]  Or whatever, whatever, HSI.
[00:53:06]  I'm like, Nice meeting you.
[00:53:07]  And I said, My name is Juan Sanchez, FBOP.
[00:53:10]  And they're like, oh my God, this guy's so funny.
[00:53:14]  So the prosecutor comes in and goes, you know what this guy said?
[00:53:16]  He said he's one such as FBOP.
[00:53:19]  And they're like, oh my God.
[00:53:20]  So we're talking.
[00:53:21]  That's great.
[00:53:22]  And the guy says, listen, do you have anything, any paper trail, these guys?
[00:53:26]  And I said, yeah, give me my laptop, give me my cell phone.
[00:53:31]  And I'll get you everything you need.
[00:53:34]  They gave me my cell phone, man.
[00:53:35]  Because I was arrested, these guys couldn't get a hold of me for like three months until the service got disconnected.
[00:53:42]  I had about 580.
[00:53:44]  Messages.
[00:53:45]  We're gonna kill you.
[00:53:46]  You're gonna die, motherfucker.
[00:53:47]  And I'm telling the prosecutor, just listen to the messages, bro.
[00:53:50]  I don't have to give you anything else.
[00:53:52]  And he's like, dude, this is really bad.
[00:53:53]  He says, listen, are you willing to cooperate?
[00:53:55]  Because if you cooperate, they are going to kill you.
[00:54:00]  So, well, let me call my kids.
[00:54:01]  So I called my kids and I said, listen, kids, this is where I'm at.
[00:54:04]  Can we do this?
[00:54:05]  Can we not do this?
[00:54:06]  Should I do this?
[00:54:06]  Should I not do this?
[00:54:07]  They said that we want you home.
[00:54:09]  We want you home.
[00:54:10]  Do what you gotta do.
[00:54:11]  So he said, if you cooperate, the Venezuelans are gonna kill you.
[00:54:14]  Did he mean they're gonna kill you while you're in prison or once you get out?
[00:54:18]  It happened while I was in prison.
[00:54:20]  And I'll tell you that my last six months I spent on solitary confinement, which I don't think Matt knows this.
[00:54:26]  You didn't mention the last six months, but it was.
[00:54:29]  So.
[00:54:30]  They put him in an ice facility.
[00:54:32]  Okay, well, it's filled with Venezuelans, with people from South America.
[00:54:37]  Look, he'll explain, but basically, the government was trying to say, let's send them back.
[00:54:42]  You send me back.
[00:54:43]  I cooperated against these guys.
[00:54:46]  They'll kill me.
[00:54:47]  Send them back.
[00:54:48]  I mean, yeah, I had an interview with eyes, and they were like, But are they gonna kill you anywhere in Venezuela?
[00:54:54]  Is there anywhere that you feel safe in Venezuela?
[00:54:55]  I'm like, Dude, Venezuela is a country about this big.
[00:54:58]  Yeah, it's like, then are they gonna kill you in Tampa anywhere?
[00:55:00]  Do you feel safe anywhere in Tampa?
[00:55:02]  How about by the river?
[00:55:03]  Good.
[00:55:04]  They're gonna kill me, man.
[00:55:05]  Period.
[00:55:06]  Especially because one of the guys, the main guy on the investigation, the prosecutor goes, Okay, this is great.
[00:55:14]  You are great.
[00:55:15]  You are a great witness.
[00:55:16]  You are not a drug guy.
[00:55:18]  Dealt with drugs.
[00:55:19]  You didn't know you were laundering money.
[00:55:21]  So you are really like a victim of these guys.
[00:55:23]  They're extorting you, they're trying to kill you.
[00:55:25]  I mean this is phenomenal, but we cannot do anything with this thing because there is no extradition from Venezuela.
[00:55:31]  So we can indict them, but they're gonna stay there and that's it.
[00:55:35]  And I said man, that sucks.
[00:55:37]  And then the prosecutor goes, unless you have a way to get him out.
[00:55:42]  Get him out of Venezuela yeah, I said.
[00:55:44]  Well, I said I have some, some alternatives.
[00:55:49]  He said, okay, give it to us.
[00:55:51]  I said, well, my first choice will be let me out and let me work outside, you know, use the phones.
[00:55:57]  They're like, no, okay, like use yourself as bait, kind of like, yeah, but I would have gone to the Bahamas and that's it, you know.
[00:56:05]  And they're like, no, no, no, that's not going to happen.
[00:56:06]  And I said, well, there is this one guy that applied for a visa to come to the United States.
[00:56:13]  And you guys denied the visa.
[00:56:16]  You told him, no, you cannot come to the United States because you are PNG, persona non grata.
[00:56:21]  I said, I guarantee you, if you call that guy and you tell him that it was a mistake, he'll be here on the next flight.
[00:56:28]  The prosecutor goes, because he wanted to come here with his family.
[00:56:30]  He had been asking you to help get him here, right?
[00:56:32]  He was telling me, like, man, man, they denied my visa.
[00:56:35]  Help me out or I'm going to kill you.
[00:56:37]  That's why he knows.
[00:56:37]  Right.
[00:56:39]  So I'm like, so the prosecutor goes, let me see if we can do that.
[00:56:44]  And that was the end of that meeting.
[00:56:45]  We never met again.
[00:56:47]  I didn't know what happened.
[00:56:49]  All right.
[00:56:49]  So I go back to my prison.
[00:56:51]  Months go by.
[00:56:52]  And I'm telling my attorney, dude, what the fuck?
[00:56:54]  We had a meeting with these guys.
[00:56:55]  I feel like the girl that you took to prom, you fucked me.
[00:56:58]  No more calls.
[00:56:59]  My prosecutor's like, bro.
[00:57:01]  I'm sorry.
[00:57:01]  My attorney's like, listen, if these guys don't leave Venezuela, there's nothing they're going to give you, bro.
[00:57:08]  We need these guys here.
[00:57:09]  All right.
[00:57:11]  Man, one day they take me downstairs to go to medical.
[00:57:14]  And I'm handcuffed and I'm standing in line and there is a guard reading names.
[00:57:19]  Smith, Jones, whatever.
[00:57:21]  And she says, this guy last name, the Venezuelan politician.
[00:57:25]  And I'm like, what the fuck?
[00:57:27]  So I look around and I see this guy walks by me.
[00:57:29]  He doesn't recognize me.
[00:57:31]  And I start going like, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.
[00:57:33]  So the guard's like, dude, what's wrong with you?
[00:57:34]  You got to pee?
[00:57:35]  And I'm like, no, I don't got to pee.
[00:57:36]  I got to get the fuck out of here.
[00:57:38]  I got to go upstairs.
[00:57:39]  I go upstairs.
[00:57:40]  I call my attorney.
[00:57:41]  I tell him, do you have any news for me?
[00:57:44]  He goes, no.
[00:57:45]  I said, well, I got news for you.
[00:57:47]  He goes, what?
[00:57:48]  He goes, I go, they arrested this guy.
[00:57:52]  He goes, well, I need you to hang up the phone and call me back in half an hour.
[00:57:55]  I hang up the phone.
[00:57:56]  I call him in half an hour.
[00:57:58]  And he goes, pack your shit.
[00:57:59]  You're going back to Coleman.
[00:58:02]  So I pack my stuff and I meet Matt again.
[00:58:05]  Matt's like, what happened, dude?
[00:58:07]  I said, man.
[00:58:08]  Oh, man.
[00:58:09]  I talked.
[00:58:10]  And then I'm telling him this story and the whole thing.
[00:58:12]  And a couple of days later, I'm on the Miami Herald.
[00:58:16]  Broom.
[00:58:17]  Front page.
[00:58:18]  And there is this guy saying, They lured me into the United States.
[00:58:22]  They told me I was going to come for tourism.
[00:58:26]  And I had my family with Disney shirts on.
[00:58:29]  So this guy, they call him and they tell him, Your visa is approved.
[00:58:33]  It was a mistake.
[00:58:34]  He went home.
[00:58:34]  He told his wife and his kids, Get dressed.
[00:58:38]  We're going to Disney.
[00:58:40]  Holy shit.
[00:58:42]  They fly in Disney shirts, hats, the whole thing.
[00:58:44]  Here's the whole shebang.
[00:58:46]  Get off classic.
[00:58:47]  You're under arrest.
[00:58:48]  Classic.
[00:58:49]  The guy flips, talks a lot.
[00:58:51]  He did 36 months in prison.
[00:58:54]  Smart guy.
[00:58:55]  And you understand that the money that they were laundering, that they were sending him to buy all the properties, was cartel money from the Sinaloa cartel.
[00:59:02]  They were laundering, the Venezuelan government was laundering drug money through him that, of course, he lost.
[00:59:10]  But regardless, that's all money laundering.
[00:59:12]  All these things are coming.
[00:59:13]  But you didn't know that.
[00:59:14]  Right, right.
[00:59:15]  And that's the problem.
[00:59:16]  They're buying Levi's and fucking apartment buildings.
[00:59:18]  Listen, I go to Venezuela one day and this guy's like, listen, you need a car to drive around?
[00:59:23]  I'm like, well, I'll take one.
[00:59:25]  He goes, yeah, drive this car around.
[00:59:26]  So I'm driving the car around.
[00:59:28]  I'm in Coleman.
[00:59:29]  This Colombian drug lord comes in and he goes, oh, you are Juan.
[00:59:35]  And I said, yeah.
[00:59:36]  He goes, dude, remember that million dollars that went through your account?
[00:59:39]  He goes, that was my money.
[00:59:40]  I said, oh, shit.
[00:59:42]  I said, yeah.
[00:59:42]  You know, remember when they kidnapped you?
[00:59:44]  That was my money.
[00:59:46]  I said, oh, all right.
[00:59:47]  You know, I mean, listen, bro, no hard feelings, you know?
[00:59:49]  Shit, shit happens.
[00:59:50]  He's like, yeah, shit happens.
[00:59:51]  Don't worry about it.
[00:59:52]  So I'm talking to him and I said, man, I remember I went to Venezuela and they gave me this car to drive.
[00:59:56]  He goes, that was my fucking car.
[00:59:59]  And I said, dude, I was driving your car.
[01:00:02]  He goes, yeah.
[01:00:03]  Wow.
[01:00:03]  I said, man, that's fucked up.
[01:00:06]  They would have thought that I was him.
[01:00:07]  They could have killed me.
[01:00:08]  So it was reckless.
[01:00:09]  It was a disaster.
[01:00:10]  And then I will tell Matt all the time, like, hey, listen, that's my kidnapper right there.
[01:00:14]  Let me go say hi to him.
[01:00:15]  Oh, man.
[01:00:16]  He hired the guys to hold him until he came up with the money that he couldn't come up with.
[01:00:20]  Yeah, I was going to come up with it.
[01:00:21]  That's just stupidity.
[01:00:22]  It's gone.
[01:00:23]  You know, the money's gone.
[01:00:25]  So I go back to Coleman, and then one day they pack me up and they send me to a penitentiary, USP Thompson, Illinois.
[01:00:36]  I go there, I do 10 months in a pen.
[01:00:39]  Now it's 2018.
[01:00:42]  And my attorney calls me.
[01:00:43]  Six years later, he goes, the government is ready to give you a sentence reduction.
[01:00:49]  Six years?
[01:00:50]  You are coming back to Miami.
[01:00:52]  So I'm like, fuck.
[01:00:53]  I go to my attorney and say, listen, bro.
[01:00:56]  He's like, we're going to ask for time served.
[01:00:59]  Perfect.
[01:01:00]  I call my kids, girls, you need to be in the courthouse June 15th.
[01:01:04]  Take clothes.
[01:01:05]  I want a fucking Big Mac.
[01:01:07]  I'm walking out.
[01:01:08]  My girls go down there.
[01:01:09]  My friends are down there.
[01:01:11]  I go to the court.
[01:01:12]  Man, there is my attorney.
[01:01:14]  There is the prosecutor from the Venezuelan case who is now retired.
[01:01:18]  There is my prosecutor who hates me because I destroyed the value of his real estate property and the judge.
[01:01:25]  And the prosecutor gets up and he's like, Your Honor, Mr. Sanchez cooperated and he was a key player for this thing, but he's a piece of shit and he shouldn't get anything because we're not going to set an example of people like that.
[01:01:38]  He didn't only scam the government and he didn't only scam a bunch of people But now we find out that he loaned their money and we're gonna reward him for this shit.
[01:01:46]  He should have gotten more time.
[01:01:47]  And I'm sitting there going and he's a womanizer and he fucked every woman that he ever worked with and he will hire these women just to fuck them.
[01:01:56]  And my kids are sitting there like, And Jesus, and I'm sitting there going and my attorney's like So then this other prosecutor gets up and he's like I don't know, I don't know if he fucked women or he didn't fuck women.
[01:02:12]  All I know is that this guy opened the largest drug investigation in the Western Hemisphere with the paperwork that he provided.

=== Life in Immigration Detention (07:14) ===

[01:02:21]  That's all we know.
[01:02:22]  Whether he fucked women, didn't fuck women, that's beyond our, you know, but we do recommend that he gets a reduction.
[01:02:28]  So my attorney got up and spoke, and then the judge looked at me and he said, you know what?
[01:02:34]  You're going to do two more years.
[01:02:37]  So my girls broke down crying.
[01:02:39]  I was super pissed, and I ended up going back to Miami.
[01:02:43]  And then from there, they decided to put me in an all immigrants prison.
[01:02:48]  So I walk in and it's all Venezuelans and Mexicans and everything.
[01:02:51]  And I'm like, holy shit.
[01:02:54]  And I'm calling my kids and they're like, dad, are you safe?
[01:02:57]  I'm like, yeah, they don't know who I am.
[01:02:58]  They don't know who I am.
[01:03:00]  So everybody kept asking me like, why are you here?
[01:03:02]  I'm like, listen, I grew up here.
[01:03:03]  I never lived in Venezuela.
[01:03:04]  I don't know anybody.
[01:03:05]  So I'm hiding the shit hat until eventually somebody walked in and said, you know who that guy is?
[01:03:10]  That's the guy that opened the investigation of the Venezuelan government.
[01:03:14]  And that's the guy.
[01:03:15]  So all the Venezuelans on the compound get together.
[01:03:18]  And one day I'm walking out of the library doing paperwork because I was doing legal paperwork for everybody.
[01:03:25]  Oh, you were doing the same.
[01:03:26]  So that's, oh my God.
[01:03:27]  Matt Cox move.
[01:03:28]  Yeah, there's the hustle, you know?
[01:03:30]  When you go to prison, you can either suck dick for money, clean rooms for money, and do legal paperwork for money.
[01:03:36]  You know, if I didn't know how to do legal paperwork, I guess I would have cleaned and then suck dick, but I went for the legal stuff.
[01:03:42]  So, dude, I walked in.
[01:03:44]  I see all the Venezuelans waiting for me, and I'm like, All right, you know, like, I guess we're going to have a little meeting.
[01:03:51]  And as soon as they're coming to me, yeah, yeah, Kumbaya, the guards walk in and they're like, Sanchez, right?
[01:03:57]  Yeah, we packed your shed.
[01:03:59]  You're going to the shoe.
[01:04:00]  I said, why?
[01:04:02]  They said, investigation.
[01:04:04]  And I spent from January to June, six months in solitary because of these fuckers.
[01:04:11]  But they had already passed the word out that I was the guy that started the investigation, and somebody Googled me and they found me.
[01:04:18]  And yeah, it became a bit of a disaster.
[01:04:21]  So, was the shoe just, you were by yourself?
[01:04:24]  Most of the time, I was by myself.
[01:04:26]  Matt said that you were in there with multiple people, right?
[01:04:28]  You can't, like, they'll have bunk beds.
[01:04:30]  You can be by yourself.
[01:04:32]  But after a certain period of time that they'll knock on the well in Coleman they knock on they'd be like hey, you want to sell it?
[01:04:38]  And you'd be like yeah, get somebody in here Yeah, like it's been it's been two weeks remember they didn't know who the guy was gonna be with me So they're like okay, we bring a guy to his cell.
[01:04:45]  He may kill him.
[01:04:46]  He may stab him.
[01:04:47]  It may be somebody that is after him You know what I mean?
[01:04:48]  Let's let's keep him around by himself, right?
[01:04:51]  So I was by myself for six months, which kind of does a number on your psyche when you get out, you know, I'm still a little edgy on some things and Then I finished in June and ice came and said okay, now you're going to immigration So I've done all this time I've done six months in the shoe.
[01:05:09]  Ice picks me up.
[01:05:10]  Now I'm no longer an inmate.
[01:05:12]  I'm a detainee, which means you cannot handcuff me in the back.
[01:05:17]  You have to handcuff me in the front.
[01:05:18]  You cannot strip search me.
[01:05:20]  I don't have good time to lose.
[01:05:22]  So I walk into this new detention center and I go to the guard.
[01:05:27]  What's the story here?
[01:05:29]  He goes, pick any cell where you want to live.
[01:05:33]  I said, wait a second.
[01:05:34]  I get to choose where I want to live?
[01:05:36]  He goes, yeah.
[01:05:37]  I said, how about disciplinary sanctions?
[01:05:39]  He goes, I mean, you can lose your phone, but because of COVID, which by the way, I didn't know there was COVID until I got out of the shoe.
[01:05:46]  This was June already.
[01:05:47]  People were dying.
[01:05:49]  And because of COVID, we cannot take your phone privileges.
[01:05:52]  I said, so I can do whatever the fuck I want and you guys cannot do anything to me.
[01:05:57]  And they were like, no.
[01:05:58]  I said, perfect.
[01:05:59]  I love it.
[01:06:00]  So my six months of the shoe, I made it up on those six months of ice, insulting people.
[01:06:04]  I burned the microwaves.
[01:06:06]  I short circuit all the door locks.
[01:06:08]  I mean, I was oh, you did it.
[01:06:09]  Dude, it was insane.
[01:06:11]  And then the warden will come to me and say, Listen, Sanchez, what do you want?
[01:06:16]  I want chicken.
[01:06:18]  We want chicken.
[01:06:19]  They were like, Dude, we'll get you chicken.
[01:06:21]  So I will get chicken on Wednesday instead of Thursday.
[01:06:24]  And all these Hispanics were like, You're the hero.
[01:06:27]  We now want Telemundo.
[01:06:29]  I got Telemundo.
[01:06:30]  Don't worry, guys.
[01:06:31]  So I will start some kind of riot for Telemundo.
[01:06:34]  I was insane.
[01:06:35]  I was out of control.
[01:06:37]  And December 18th, I used to fight with all the guards.
[01:06:42]  And you become very.
[01:06:45]  Which kind of sucks to say it, but you become very racial when you're in immigration because you have these guards that look at you like you're an immigrant and you should be kicked out.
[01:06:54]  You know, and you're the immigrant going, listen, man, you're a racist piece of shit.
[01:06:59]  Yeah.
[01:06:59]  So the terms of endearment between me and the guards were not exactly, you know, politically correct.
[01:07:06]  Right.
[01:07:06]  All right.
[01:07:07]  On either way, you know.
[01:07:09]  So I'm yelling at a guard on the reg yard and I'm like, man, you motherfucker, blah, blah, blah.
[01:07:14]  You think I'm a fucking Mexican?
[01:07:15]  I'm not a Mexican.
[01:07:16]  I speak English.
[01:07:17]  I grew up here, blah, blah, blah.
[01:07:18]  Because the guards will insult people in English, thinking they didn't understand.
[01:07:22]  Oh really, yeah.
[01:07:23]  And then one of the detainees comes to me and goes, hey listen, ICE is looking for you outside.
[01:07:27]  And I go to the detainee.
[01:07:28]  I said, listen, tell that if he wants to talk to me he has to come here.
[01:07:33]  He goes in.
[01:07:34]  He comes right back out.
[01:07:36]  He says he wants to talk to you.
[01:07:38]  I said well, i'm here, all right.
[01:07:41]  He goes back in.
[01:07:42]  He comes back out.
[01:07:43]  He says, you have two minutes bro, to talk to him, or he's leaving.
[01:07:47]  I said to the guard, man, don't go anywhere because i'm not done with you.
[01:07:51]  I go in there and the guy from ICE looks at me and goes, oh shit, is you?
[01:07:56]  And I said, yeah.
[01:07:58]  He goes, man.
[01:08:00]  He said, here, boom, you're getting released.
[01:08:03]  I said, man, shut the fuck up.
[01:08:04]  He goes, read it.
[01:08:06]  You're the law guy.
[01:08:07]  Read it.
[01:08:08]  I read it.
[01:08:10]  I go, man, I'm getting released.
[01:08:12]  He goes, yeah, you're getting released.
[01:08:14]  I don't know when.
[01:08:15]  I said, bro, if you're pulling my leg, you know I'm fucking crazy.
[01:08:18]  I'm going to burn this shit down.
[01:08:20]  No, no, no, don't worry about it.
[01:08:21]  He goes, believe me, I want you out.
[01:08:23]  We all want you out.
[01:08:25]  I'll try to get you out today.
[01:08:27]  I sign my papers.
[01:08:29]  One day goes by, another day goes by.
[01:08:30]  It's December 22nd.
[01:08:32]  Man, I'm still in there.
[01:08:34]  I start when you're an inmate.
[01:08:35]  I don't know if you ever did this in a cell.
[01:08:37]  When you're an inmate, you bang on the doors.
[01:08:39]  You don't use your hands.
[01:08:41]  You ball kick.
[01:08:43]  It's back of your leg.
[01:08:45]  So yeah, the back of your leg because that makes it loud, bro.
[01:08:49]  So I start banging.
[01:08:52]  The guy from Ice Comes.
[01:08:53]  Dude, what the fuck is your problem?
[01:08:55]  I said, man, you told me I was leaving.
[01:08:56]  It's December 22nd.
[01:08:58]  Why am I still here?
[01:09:01]  He goes, man.
[01:09:02]  For security reasons, I cannot tell you when you're leaving, but i'm gonna give you my opinion, just to get you off my back.
[01:09:10]  My opinion is tomorrow.
[01:09:12]  By 10 a.m.
[01:09:14]  I said, all right, he goes, all right, he leaves.
[01:09:18]  Man, I said i'm leaving tomorrow so I didn't tell my daughters, I just showed up at their house.
[01:09:24]  I had a friend pick me up.
[01:09:25]  I walked out with my great shirt, my great sweats and my you know, I don't know what do you call those?
[01:09:32]  You have the video.
[01:09:33]  Yeah, He can give you the video.

=== Release Date Uncertainty (09:48) ===

[01:09:35]  Really?
[01:09:35]  Those daughters go nuts.
[01:09:36]  I show up at my daughter's house December 23rd, man, after eight and a half years.
[01:09:43]  And they went bonkers.
[01:09:46]  Yeah.
[01:09:47]  That's incredible.
[01:09:48]  And then I started the second phase of the journey, which is I don't have a work permit.
[01:09:51]  I don't have a driver license.
[01:09:53]  But I volunteer in a law firm because I used to do so much legal paperwork.
[01:09:59]  This attorney told me, listen, why don't you come work for me?
[01:10:03]  Is this the video?
[01:10:08]  This is funny.
[01:10:10]  That's my oldest daughter.
[01:10:11]  She has a dog in the house.
[01:10:18]  Oh, so you.
[01:10:19]  The daughters, they just start bawling, crying.
[01:10:24]  Oh.
[01:10:33]  Listen.
[01:10:36]  I almost talked because this goes on for five more minutes.
[01:10:40]  She's hysterical.
[01:10:41]  She can't stop crying.
[01:10:43]  You had two days before.
[01:10:44]  What was that like?
[01:10:44]  That's awesome.
[01:10:46]  Well, weird because you walk out of prison numbed.
[01:10:51]  Like people feel, but you don't feel.
[01:10:53]  So it's like people get sad, but you don't get sad.
[01:10:55]  People get, you know, you are so used to seeing pain and hurting and all, you know, that like people who watch that video and they go, man, why aren't you that more emotional?
[01:11:05]  I'm like, I don't know.
[01:11:05]  It was so, it was surreal.
[01:11:07]  Yeah.
[01:11:07]  You know, you're out there and you're like, man, this is, I don't, I don't understand.
[01:11:11]  Plus, people become interchangeable too.
[01:11:13]  Like, you have to understand, I can be best friends with you.
[01:11:15]  Like, you're the coolest guy.
[01:11:17]  And then one day you're on the blackout, you're gone.
[01:11:19]  I never hear from you again.
[01:11:21]  So I start talking to you.
[01:11:22]  And then two months later, you're gone.
[01:11:23]  Somebody else comes in.
[01:11:24]  He's cool.
[01:11:25]  He's gone three months.
[01:11:26]  Somebody else, so you have these people that you have to understand you're cool with, but you don't even get to like miss them, they're like gone.
[01:11:35]  They're just so.
[01:11:35]  Imagine if every six months or three months or a year your wife dies, or your buddy dies, or your best friend dies, it's just gone.
[01:11:45]  And you're like, so you get to that point where you become you're cool, I like hanging out with you, but you're a stick of furniture, yeah, you're just interchange like you'll be gone so you don't allow yourself to get that connection anymore, and you just become a Listen, it turns you into a psychopath.
[01:12:02]  If you weren't going in, you are coming out.
[01:12:05]  Yeah.
[01:12:06]  And the problem is, man, now I'm dealing with a bunch of stuff.
[01:12:10]  Like we were talking about the other day, we have similar.
[01:12:14]  If you do fraud at the scale that I used to do it, you have issues.
[01:12:20]  You have issues of, you're a sociopath.
[01:12:23]  Because people ask me, did you ever feel bad about scamming these people?
[01:12:26]  And I'm like, no, it actually felt pretty good.
[01:12:29]  It actually, you know, the fact that you go to battle.
[01:12:32]  and you win the battle every time, that's freaking amazing.
[01:12:37]  But when people look at you, well, the problem is the guy that lost the battle is now fucked out of money.
[01:12:42]  And you're like, well, but you don't think about that because the money becomes irrelevant.
[01:12:47]  You know, there is a point where a million, two million, five million, six hundred thousand, $20, $30.
[01:12:51]  That's not why you do it.
[01:12:53]  You do it because it's a fix.
[01:12:55]  You're a little sick in the head.
[01:12:57]  So now I get out and I have to be on the other extreme of the spectrum.
[01:13:04]  So the other day, I can't believe I'm going to tell this story.
[01:13:08]  The other day, I go to a supermarket, man, and the cashier goes, hey, you need a mask.
[01:13:14]  I said, dude, do you have a mask?
[01:13:17]  Was this in Florida?
[01:13:18]  Yeah.
[01:13:18]  And I'm like, well, in Orlando.
[01:13:20]  And I'm like, that's fine.
[01:13:21]  They usually give you a mask.
[01:13:24]  You know, I said, well, do you have a mask?
[01:13:25]  And he goes, well, we are now selling them for $1.50.
[01:13:29]  I said, are you fucking kidding me, dude?
[01:13:31]  I come here all the time and you always give me a mask.
[01:13:34]  Yeah, we now sell them for $1.50.
[01:13:35]  I said, you know what?
[01:13:36]  Give me the fucking mask.
[01:13:37]  Here's the $1.50.
[01:13:38]  So, as I'm walking out, the manager is standing out and I said, listen, bro, I come here every day.
[01:13:44]  I buy lunch.
[01:13:45]  I buy my groceries here.
[01:13:46]  This guy charged me $1.50 per mask and I had to get three masks just to prove a point.
[01:13:53]  So the guy goes, oh, shit, man, that's wrong.
[01:13:55]  You know, we're going to give you a $4.50 credit.
[01:13:58]  All right.
[01:13:58]  So I walk out and I'm like, man, I scored.
[01:14:01]  I did it.
[01:14:02]  You know?
[01:14:03]  So I go to Maria.
[01:14:05]  Who was the attorney that I work with?
[01:14:07]  And I tell her, man, you know what happened?
[01:14:10]  I fucked these people.
[01:14:12]  I came in there.
[01:14:13]  I told them I got one mask, but then I told them three masks and it was $450 and I got $450.
[01:14:18]  And she goes, all right, I'm going to drive you right back.
[01:14:22]  You're going to give him back the $3.
[01:14:25]  I'm like, I don't, I don't, why am I going to give him back the $3 if I scored him?
[01:14:29]  They fucked me out of money.
[01:14:31]  She goes, yes, but you cannot fuck people out of money just because they fucked you out of money because you are not normal.
[01:14:37]  You see, you don't know the difference between $3 and a million.
[01:14:41]  So if you get away with that one.
[01:14:43]  The next one, it could be $100,000.
[01:14:46]  So you got to go back and give this guy his $3 back.
[01:14:50]  So I had to walk in there like a five year old, like, I'm sorry.
[01:14:54]  I like, I like, I love.
[01:14:55]  Did she walk you in there, hold your hand, and walk you in there?
[01:14:58]  Let me tell you, she does this shit all the time.
[01:15:01]  Like, I run things by her and she'll be like, listen, let's talk about this.
[01:15:06]  Okay.
[01:15:08]  What happens to these people that you're going to do this?
[01:15:09]  Well, they may get fucked or they may not get fucked.
[01:15:14]  Okay, that is a problem.
[01:15:15]  And we're not doing that right now because you're on probation.
[01:15:19]  Okay, I guess I won't do that anymore.
[01:15:21]  See, to me, it's funny he says that because I'm actually the opposite.
[01:15:25]  Like, I went to Dunkin' Donuts the other day.
[01:15:28]  I handed them, I handed them like $20.
[01:15:32]  The girl counts out the money and she gave me back like $25 plus some change.
[01:15:37]  And I went, no, no, you give me $10 too much.
[01:15:43]  It was, I gave you $20.
[01:15:44]  And she's like, no, no, I gave you this.
[01:15:46]  I went, no.
[01:15:48]  Now you gave me, I give you a 20.
[01:15:50]  You just gave me 25 or 26 and 12 cents, my coffee and my thing, that was this.
[01:15:55]  And she's like no no, she goes and gets her manager.
[01:15:58]  Manager comes back, they look in the thing and I'm sitting there in the line and she, they're going.
[01:16:03]  No no, it's, it's right.
[01:16:04]  And I go.
[01:16:05]  Ma'am, I said I assure you I didn't give you and I open my wallet.
[01:16:09]  I only have 20s.
[01:16:11]  I didn't give you 30, I go.
[01:16:13]  You gave me too much money.
[01:16:14]  Now I said I'll leave, I'm good, She goes, hold on.
[01:16:18]  She opens a register, she looks at it, she goes.
[01:16:20]  Yeah, you're right.
[01:16:21]  You gave him an extra.
[01:16:22]  Here's a free coffee.
[01:16:23]  Here's a gift card.
[01:16:24]  No, I just gave her the money back, and I was like, you know, and I drove, and I left.
[01:16:28]  But I mean, that's like how did that make you feel, Matt Cox?
[01:16:30]  You know what?
[01:16:31]  And it seems silly.
[01:16:32]  It doesn't make me feel.
[01:16:33]  It's a brand new feeling for him.
[01:16:34]  It didn't make me feel any way at all because I just, here's the problem is like, it's constantly like people contacting me about fraud.
[01:16:43]  I could do this.
[01:16:43]  I could do this.
[01:16:44]  And it's like, no, no, no, no.
[01:16:46]  It doesn't matter.
[01:16:47]  Like, there was a long time ago I would have been like, how can I use this guy?
[01:16:50]  But now I'm like, you don't understand.
[01:16:52]  They're looking for a reason for me to fuck up.
[01:16:55]  I do one thing.
[01:16:56]  I get in front of the judge.
[01:16:57]  I'm done.
[01:16:59]  I can never be in front of him.
[01:17:01]  Like there's silly things the other day.
[01:17:03]  The cameras.
[01:17:05]  Oh, the cameras the other day.
[01:17:07]  Literally, this is what happened.
[01:17:09]  So I order these cameras, right?
[01:17:10]  Like I have a buddy who bought cameras for me.
[01:17:12]  Keep talking.
[01:17:12]  I got to pee.
[01:17:13]  Okay.
[01:17:13]  So I had a buddy who bought cameras for me.
[01:17:16]  I get the cameras.
[01:17:19]  Amazon says you have to be there on, on, On Saturday to get the camera, you have to sign for them.
[01:17:26]  Okay.
[01:17:27]  So on Friday, I got another package.
[01:17:31]  I go out, I get my package.
[01:17:34]  I go to open my box.
[01:17:35]  I look down.
[01:17:36]  There's three little boxes just sitting under my box at the apartment complex.
[01:17:40]  And I went, That's weird.
[01:17:43]  Yeah.
[01:17:44]  Look down.
[01:17:45]  Sure enough, they're for me.
[01:17:47]  And I went, Huh.
[01:17:49]  And so I pick them up, go back to my house, open up the boxes.
[01:17:54]  Hey, this is the cameras.
[01:17:55]  Like, first, they said to be here Saturday.
[01:17:56]  It came a day early.
[01:17:57]  How many did you order?
[01:17:58]  Three of them.
[01:17:59]  Okay.
[01:18:00]  And now I have to make payments to my buddy.
[01:18:01]  Like, I don't even have the money to buy the cameras.
[01:18:03]  You know, this ain't cheap.
[01:18:05]  Yeah.
[01:18:05]  So I was like, oh, cool.
[01:18:07]  And of course, my, and I thought, yeah, I was supposed to sign for these.
[01:18:10]  Nobody even signed for these.
[01:18:11]  These are expensive.
[01:18:12]  What if someone took them?
[01:18:13]  And my first thought was opportunity.
[01:18:17]  Like I could, I'll never sign for them.
[01:18:20]  Right.
[01:18:20]  So I can just call.
[01:18:21]  Yeah.
[01:18:22]  You got three free cameras.
[01:18:23]  Right.
[01:18:23]  But you see, let me stop you there for a second.
[01:18:25]  That's what my friends tell me.
[01:18:27]  That thought is not normal.
[01:18:29]  Isn't it funny?
[01:18:29]  Because that's my first thought.
[01:18:31]  So it's mine.
[01:18:31]  How do I get over on it?
[01:18:33]  How do I use this to my advantage?
[01:18:34]  That is not normal.
[01:18:35]  I am told.
[01:18:36]  I think it's perfectly normal.
[01:18:37]  See, what's funny is I think it's perfectly.
[01:18:39]  My first thought is how do I use this to my advantage?
[01:18:41]  Correct.
[01:18:41]  So the first thing I do is I call my buddy.
[01:18:43]  I go, boom.
[01:18:44]  And I explain it to him.
[01:18:45]  And I said, Opportunity and he goes, Yeah, yeah, he was right.
[01:18:49]  He goes, So, what do you want to do?
[01:18:50]  I said, Well, here's what I'm thinking.
[01:18:52]  And then I went, and so I talked to him for a couple minutes, and I hang up, and then I start thinking, If I say I didn't get them, like they're not gonna look into it, they're just gonna give me more cameras.
[01:19:03]  I'll get more cameras, I'll sell them, sell them, I'll get that'll pay for almost the whole cameras, even if I discount them, whatever.
[01:19:08]  And then I was like, and I thought, if they even punch my name in the computer and they see who I am, yeah.
[01:19:18]  They may actually look into it.
[01:19:20]  Like at this point, they're going to be like, look, if we can get anybody, we can get this guy.
[01:19:23]  Yeah.

=== Mental Health After Prison Time (08:40) ===

[01:19:24]  Yeah.
[01:19:24]  He can't even mount the defense.
[01:19:26]  So for sure.
[01:19:27]  And then I go back and I think, what if there's a camera?
[01:19:30]  What if they look at the camera?
[01:19:31]  My buddy's going, they're not going to look at the camera.
[01:19:33]  What if it's a setup?
[01:19:34]  Right.
[01:19:34]  Well, it's not even a setup, but I'm like, they look at the camera and he's like, it's not enough money for him to.
[01:19:38]  And you're right.
[01:19:39]  If it wasn't me, it would, but it is me.
[01:19:43]  Yeah.
[01:19:43]  And all they, it's a couple of phone calls and I'm in front of the judge trying to explain why I lied.
[01:19:49]  And oh, we have surveillance.
[01:19:51]  And it's like, And listen, the judge, and then the judge yanks, you know, he yanks me up and says, you know what, I'm going to give you five years just on probate.
[01:19:58]  I'm going to violate your probation and give you a whole new five years.
[01:20:01]  And even though we can't do that, it'll take you at least two or three years to try and unravel it and fix it in the court.
[01:20:07]  Like, he'll be furious.
[01:20:08]  And I was like, what are you doing?
[01:20:10]  Like, I'm so far on the other end of the.
[01:20:12]  I'm so scared.
[01:20:14]  Like, I'm so terrified.
[01:20:15]  Yeah.
[01:20:17]  But, you know, but you're right.
[01:20:18]  My first thought is always free cameras.
[01:20:22]  How do I this?
[01:20:22]  How do I that?
[01:20:23]  How can I this?
[01:20:23]  How can I remember the lessons?
[01:20:25]  That you put on your little kit in the drug program.
[01:20:29]  I broke down all that.
[01:20:31]  Criminal thinking errors.
[01:20:32]  It's all criminal thinking, but I've taken that, most of those.
[01:20:35]  I've placed them in a box.
[01:20:36]  I've closed the box and I placed it on the shelf.
[01:20:38]  It's there.
[01:20:39]  I know it's there.
[01:20:40]  At a later date.
[01:20:41]  Right, but it's not really actively available.
[01:20:45]  So, yeah.
[01:20:46]  But I'll tell you some interesting facts about a prison that you guys.
[01:20:50]  I know people that watch these podcasts.
[01:20:53]  They want to hear the crime and they want to hear the stuff, but they also want to hear, like, like, orange is the new black.
[01:20:58]  Is it really like that?
[01:20:59]  Yeah, and there is a level of insanity in prison that I didn't know existed until I started reading my my, my facebook posts, because I was writing every week what was going on, and some days I was super sad and some days I was super happy.
[01:21:12]  But I remember one day i'm going into education and i'm like, let me see what classes these guys are teaching.
[01:21:17]  This is a prison.
[01:21:20]  So they're teaching scuba diving?
[01:21:22]  Okay, it's one of the classes.
[01:21:24]  What?
[01:21:25]  Sailing is another one of the classes.
[01:21:27]  And sea navigation?
[01:21:28]  Now, we don't have any body of water anywhere in this prison except the toilets.
[01:21:35]  They're teaching CDL license, how to drive a truck, but there is no trucks to drive.
[01:21:41]  And then real estate investment.
[01:21:46]  Bingo.
[01:21:47]  And credit management.
[01:21:48]  Wait, wait, wait, wait.
[01:21:49]  What about the, what's it when you grow plants?
[01:21:52]  Horticulture.
[01:21:55]  Horticulture.
[01:21:56]  So, it's okay.
[01:21:57]  Just do it.
[01:21:58]  We can keep going.
[01:21:59]  So, I'm thinking, okay, who's teaching sea navigation?
[01:22:03]  And they tell me, well, it's this guy that used to transport kilos of cocaine from the Bahamas.
[01:22:09]  I'm like, okay.
[01:22:10]  Nice.
[01:22:10]  And who's teaching the truck driving class?
[01:22:12]  Well, it's this guy that got caught with a bunch of kilos of heroin in the truck.
[01:22:16]  I said, all right.
[01:22:18]  And who's teaching real estate?
[01:22:19]  Well, Matt Cox.
[01:22:20]  I'm like, oh, that's fantastic.
[01:22:23]  Well, I might as well teach the credit class.
[01:22:25]  I got it.
[01:22:26]  Yeah.
[01:22:26]  So I remember writing home going, this is insane.
[01:22:31]  Who decides to teach scuba diving?
[01:22:33]  And by the way, these classes were packed.
[01:22:36]  And there was no tank, no regulator.
[01:22:38]  These guys are just telling you, like, listen, this is how you do it.
[01:22:42]  Yeah, yeah.
[01:22:43]  And people are taking notes on this stuff.
[01:22:46]  And it was just insane.
[01:22:48]  Then you get these gangsters knitting and making sweaters and making stuff with animals.
[01:22:55]  They're making teddy bears.
[01:22:57]  I still hear them talking like, hey, listen, motherfucker.
[01:22:59]  That nut's too tight, man.
[01:23:01]  That nut's too tight.
[01:23:02]  And you're like, what are you talking about?
[01:23:04]  And they're like, yeah, yeah.
[01:23:05]  And they pull the nut of the guy.
[01:23:06]  And the guy's like, man, I'm going to kick your ass.
[01:23:09]  And I was like, this is something is off in here.
[01:23:15]  Or you go to commissary and you'll hear the guy going, What?
[01:23:20]  There is no strawberry ice cream this week?
[01:23:22]  That's fucked up, man.
[01:23:25]  And I remember telling people, was that part of your sentence?
[01:23:27]  I mean, did the judge tell you, like, listen, you're going to get strawberry ice cream every week.
[01:23:32]  If you don't call me, I'll take care of that.
[01:23:35]  So it's weird.
[01:23:38]  It's very weird.
[01:23:39]  At the medium, there was a guy who was like 17, 18 years old in Colombia.
[01:23:44]  He had murdered like 15 or 20 people.
[01:23:48]  And for, like, Pablo Escobar, and the feds at some point picked him up and he got a life sentence and he was the, he was the altar boy or deacon or whatever you, for the Catholic mass at the, at the medium had killed like 15 or 20 people.
[01:24:07]  Well, nice guy, the guy that was teaching parenting was remember, the Spanish guy who was doing life and who was teaching parenting.
[01:24:14]  Wow yeah, what the hell.
[01:24:16]  So it was.
[01:24:17]  It's a it's insanity.
[01:24:18]  It's insanity.
[01:24:20]  You mentioned that when you went to the shoe for six months Months, it had an effect on your psyche, yeah.
[01:24:25]  Yeah, I got out and uh, I have issues sleeping because you're so used to the light being on all the time and people banging on the door every half an hour because they want to know if you kill yourself or like they was the biggest question they ask you on every prison you go is, Do you feel like you want to harm yourself or others?
[01:24:45]  And you're like, No, man, I don't feel like I want to harm myself, I feel like I want to harm others, but not myself, and uh, so they check on you all the time.
[01:24:53]  And then you're kind of confined into four walls and you get used to that space.
[01:24:57]  Like, I'm used to little spaces.
[01:24:59]  I'm not used to big spaces.
[01:25:02]  And crowds kind of like get on my nerves.
[01:25:05]  And small talk.
[01:25:06]  Like, I used to be a small talk guy.
[01:25:08]  Like, to commit fraud, you have to small talk.
[01:25:10]  You go there and you're like, hey, so how about the game?
[01:25:12]  And how about the weather?
[01:25:13]  And now I go to like meetings and I'm like, these guys are a bunch of fucking idiots, man.
[01:25:17]  You know, I mean, I'm, I'm, I, so it's weird.
[01:25:20]  Prison changes you and it changes you in all aspects.
[01:25:23]  Any of you guys are girlfriends or married or whatever or boyfriends?
[01:25:26]  I mean, it's 2021.
[01:25:27]  I'm married.
[01:25:28]  That's popular now.
[01:25:30]  Dude, imagine eight and a half years in my case, 13 on Matt's case, not getting laid.
[01:25:38]  I mean, I'm assuming Matt went 13 years not getting laid, but eight and a half years.
[01:25:42]  That's a big assumption.
[01:25:44]  That's a big assumption.
[01:25:45]  I used to tell the guys, like, when they call their girlfriends, I said, ask them, have you been unfaithful?
[01:25:49]  Yeah.
[01:25:49]  Well, I have too.
[01:25:53]  But yeah, dude.
[01:25:55]  You don't think about those things.
[01:25:56]  Eight and a half years not touching somebody, or somebody not touching you, and it's like you start disconnecting from all those things, you know?
[01:26:04]  So then you get out, and it's readapting is weird.
[01:26:08]  Are there any things that you can like put your finger on or like point to in your personality that change specifically from the six months in solitary?
[01:26:15]  Like is there anything about that six months that you know that changed something?
[01:26:18]  Yeah, dude.
[01:26:20]  I learned to talk to myself, but I think I'm talking to other people.
[01:26:25]  So like the other day somebody was giving me like an hour and a half ride and I'm sitting in the car like this for an hour and a half and she goes, dude, what the fuck?
[01:26:35]  You haven't said a word.
[01:26:38]  And I said, oh my God, but I was talking.
[01:26:40]  I just wasn't talking to you.
[01:26:42]  But I was having like a full out conversation with myself, and I'm nodding and I'm like, so I find myself doing a lot of like talking to myself.
[01:26:50]  Do you ever know that?
[01:26:51]  I thought, don't most people talk to me?
[01:26:53]  Like, I talk to myself all the time.
[01:26:55]  I have arguments with people.
[01:26:57]  I'll have arguments.
[01:26:58]  Like, if I'm going to argue with Jess, by the time I get to her house, I've had that argument about 30 times.
[01:27:04]  I've answered every.
[01:27:05]  I've overcome every objection.
[01:27:07]  Every objection is over.
[01:27:08]  I have rebuttals to everything she's going to say.
[01:27:10]  So by the time she actually gets an opportunity to start the conversation, it's over.
[01:27:14]  I'm going to win the argument.
[01:27:15]  I've had it 30 fucking times.
[01:27:17]  You're done.
[01:27:18]  I win.
[01:27:18]  This is what we're doing.
[01:27:20]  Yeah.
[01:27:20]  Okay.
[01:27:21]  Thank you.
[01:27:21]  Okay.
[01:27:21]  I feel good about that.
[01:27:22]  I feel better about that.
[01:27:23]  But yeah, go ahead.
[01:27:23]  That everybody has what?
[01:27:24]  That she's going to win the argument?
[01:27:26]  No.
[01:27:26]  It's not.
[01:27:27]  She does.
[01:27:28]  Internal dialogue, I think, in general is important.
[01:27:30]  Yeah.
[01:27:31]  Yeah.
[01:27:31]  I mean, that you do a lot of like introspect.
[01:27:35]  I guess you live your life over and over and over and over.
[01:27:37]  So you get like these snapshots of your life when you're sitting there and you're kind of thinking.
[01:27:42]  So I don't know.
[01:27:43]  You just walk out of it.
[01:27:44]  I have issues sleeping in a big bed.
[01:27:45]  So sometimes I sleep better in a house.
[01:27:47]  That took a long time.
[01:27:48]  Yeah, it took a long time for me to sleep on a dude, I go to the couch and I'm like, man, this is perfect.
[01:27:53]  You know, the big bed, I don't sleep well because you're like rolling and it's like, man, this shit's endless.
[01:27:58]  You said that at one point, you said that when you talk about yourself to people in the prison that you say that like, I'm crazy, man.
[01:28:04]  I'm crazy.

=== Getting Tattooed for Identity (07:26) ===

[01:28:05]  Don't fuck with me.
[01:28:05]  I'm crazy.
[01:28:07]  Is that really you or was that just sort of like a personality or a hat you were wearing?
[01:28:11]  I think you go a little crazy.
[01:28:12]  When you've done some time, you go a little crazy.
[01:28:15]  And you don't know you're crazy.
[01:28:17]  Crazy becomes normal.
[01:28:19]  Like, I was, we were talking about it the other day.
[01:28:22]  I mean, somebody, let's say he gets walked with a lock on the head and he's on the floor bleeding.
[01:28:28]  Your first thought is, let's help this guy out.
[01:28:31]  Our first thought is, shit, we got to take a shower, man, because they're going to close the showers.
[01:28:36]  We're going to get some ice.
[01:28:36]  I need to get ice.
[01:28:37]  I need some coffee.
[01:28:39]  Can you get the radio from that guy?
[01:28:40]  Because that's my fucking radio.
[01:28:41]  So it's, you are going to put it, I got to put it in a cop out.
[01:28:46]  I literally, guy got stabbed one time before they locked us down.
[01:28:49]  I had filled out a cop out for his room.
[01:28:52]  and put it under the counselor's door.
[01:28:55]  So we're literally the next day when the counselor comes in, they're all locked down.
[01:28:59]  Why?
[01:28:59]  I don't know, but Cox wants his room.
[01:29:01]  I mean, I did.
[01:29:02]  I got his room too, by the way.
[01:29:03]  Go ahead.
[01:29:03]  Yeah, well, you ask, is the guy coming back?
[01:29:05]  No, no, he seems to be in a coma.
[01:29:07]  All right.
[01:29:07]  Can I get his room?
[01:29:08]  This guy just got stabbed up a little.
[01:29:11]  He's fine.
[01:29:11]  Can I move to the bottom bunk?
[01:29:13]  So you become a little, that turns you a little crazy.
[01:29:17]  Especially when you get the new kids coming and there are new inmates and they don't know you, you kind of don't have patience for that kind of stuff.
[01:29:22]  You earn your stripes.
[01:29:24]  You know, and you do some crazy things.
[01:29:26]  I mean, Matt did his own set of crazy things, and everybody does their own set of crazy things in prison.
[01:29:31]  I, I, uh, this tattoo, this is a prison tattoo right here.
[01:29:34]  Wow, that thing's pretty fucking, I was looking, I've been looking at that.
[01:29:37]  That thing seemed pretty fucking incredible.
[01:29:38]  And let me tell you, so I go to the pen, and uh, and you didn't have that at call.
[01:29:44]  Oh, what is it?
[01:29:45]  And did you understand that this is like not you?
[01:29:48]  This is not how I see you.
[01:29:49]  Well, you know, I'm a business gangster now.
[01:29:51]  It's a new thing that I'm trying.
[01:29:54]  This is Michael, Archangel.
[01:29:58]  Archangel.
[01:29:59]  Michael stepping on the devil.
[01:30:01]  But so I go to the pen, and the big thing at the pen is getting tattooed.
[01:30:06]  So I'm like, man, I got to get tattooed.
[01:30:07]  You know, I got to get ink.
[01:30:09]  So I call my daughters, and I'm like, man, I got to get some prison ink.
[01:30:12]  And my daughters are like, that.
[01:30:12]  You're so stupid.
[01:30:13]  You know, you're not a gangster.
[01:30:16]  And you're like a white collar criminal.
[01:30:19]  And I'm like, you know, and I'm rapping to them like, you know, like Kendrick Lamar.
[01:30:23]  Damn, I got bitches.
[01:30:24]  Damn.
[01:30:25]  And they're like, that, stop it.
[01:30:27]  You're brown.
[01:30:29]  Which, by the way, I'm told, I was told after your podcast, somebody corrected me and said, no, you are cinnamon mocha.
[01:30:35]  Cinnamon mocha.
[01:30:36]  Nice.
[01:30:36]  I said, ah.
[01:30:37]  So I tell this guy, I said, listen, I want to get tattooed.
[01:30:40]  He goes, okay, you got to make your own ink.
[01:30:43]  I said, how do you do that?
[01:30:44]  He goes, well, you got to get Vaseline, you make a fuse out of toilet paper, and then with a battery, you light it up.
[01:30:52]  You put it inside of your locker and you let it burn.
[01:30:56]  That black dust, I guess, I don't know what you guys call it.
[01:30:59]  Ashes.
[01:31:00]  Like the ashes that stick to the sides of the locker.
[01:31:02]  You take your idea and you scrape it in a piece of paper.
[01:31:06]  Then you get shampoo.
[01:31:09]  You take the alcohol patch from the diabetics and you put a couple drops of alcohol in a little bottle and then you shake it, shake it, shake it with the ashes in it.
[01:31:17]  And you shake it until it turns black.
[01:31:20]  Then you run your finger and when it runs, you tell the guy, it's ready, bro.
[01:31:24]  Let's get this done.
[01:31:26]  So he goes, Well, you need to get the needle.
[01:31:28]  And I go, Well, where do I get the needle?
[01:31:30]  He goes, You got to go to the church and take the guitar and cut one of the strings.
[01:31:36]  So occasionally the priest will be like, Dude, we're missing five or four strings from the fucking guitar.
[01:31:42]  Can you guys stop tattooing this?
[01:31:44]  I mean, we cannot sing.
[01:31:46]  So you get a piece of the string, they strain it out, they burn it up.
[01:31:49]  And then the tattoo gun is made with the mother of a wall clock, a toothbrush.
[01:31:56]  Uh, and a pen and they put the needle through that and they start tattooing you.
[01:32:02]  Jeez, that is so toxic that you break into a fever for like two days and you got like the shakes for two days and then you gotta wear long sleeves because if the guards see you tattooed and it's fresh yeah, you lose 54 days.
[01:32:18]  Once that is healed, they know you them.
[01:32:20]  So once that is healed, you're taking your shirt off everywhere and you're walking out of the shower and then they'll call you like, listen, come here.
[01:32:27]  You didn't have that when you came in.
[01:32:28]  Yeah, I did.
[01:32:29]  Well we dude, we have a picture of you without it.
[01:32:31]  Yeah, now let's come in, let's take a new picture of it all.
[01:32:34]  Right, there you go.
[01:32:35]  So yeah, so I got my, my tattoo, my ink, did uh, did anybody that you know, or did you ever get sick from Covid?
[01:32:41]  When you're in there, I got a couple of friends that died of out of Covid.
[01:32:45]  That you really, that you knew because they came from Co.
[01:32:48]  They died there.
[01:32:49]  They came from Common, a Dominican guy named Manolo, dark skin.
[01:32:52]  He used to play softball.
[01:32:54]  That was sounds familiar.
[01:32:55]  Yeah, he was in Common for a long time.
[01:32:57]  He died of Covid.
[01:32:58]  What about the tattoos, kind of like a prison vaccine.
[01:33:02]  Getting all those.
[01:33:04]  Well, but some people get like MERS and shit like that because they get tattooed and then they go take a shower and it's just like, that's bad.
[01:33:11]  I've seen some people's art get all fucked up.
[01:33:13]  But you know how much this was?
[01:33:15]  A pair of shoes.
[01:33:16]  25 bucks.
[01:33:17]  25 bucks.
[01:33:18]  Damn.
[01:33:19]  And the guy told me, listen, I'll do the whole sleeve for 250.
[01:33:23]  Some mackerel, some stamps.
[01:33:25]  And I was ready to do it, but they moved the guy.
[01:33:28]  So, you know, now I come out the streets and this was 350.
[01:33:33]  What are you doing, bro?
[01:33:35]  Gangster, bro.
[01:33:36]  Business gangster.
[01:33:36]  That's the future, man.
[01:33:37]  Matt, why don't you get any tattoos?
[01:33:39]  I'm getting tattoos.
[01:33:40]  Look at me.
[01:33:40]  He's got a tramp stamp.
[01:33:41]  Do you have a tramp stamp?
[01:33:43]  Don't listen to him.
[01:33:44]  Do you guys got tattoos?
[01:33:45]  Don't say stuff like that.
[01:33:46]  I have one, yeah, yeah.
[01:33:47]  Yeah?
[01:33:47]  Do you?
[01:33:48]  I just actually recently got it for a friend of ours who was learning to get tattooed and she had to do some like fake stuff.
[01:33:53]  Oh, you don't want to do that.
[01:33:54]  Yeah, I did it.
[01:33:55]  No, no, no.
[01:33:56]  You don't want to get a tattoo from a guy that you started.
[01:33:58]  You don't want to get a vasectomy from a guy that you started.
[01:34:00]  This is just certain things you don't do with guys that you started with.
[01:34:04]  Not a vasectomy, but the tattoo was cool because I had no reason.
[01:34:07]  I had never had an interest in getting tattooed before, but it was like a.
[01:34:10]  Is it good?
[01:34:10]  Did it turn out good?
[01:34:11]  It's decent.
[01:34:11]  Yeah, it's decent.
[01:34:12]  It's all right.
[01:34:13]  Yeah.
[01:34:13]  You get addicted, though.
[01:34:14]  It is.
[01:34:15]  I can see how it's definitely addicting.
[01:34:16]  You definitely want more.
[01:34:17]  And then you see it and you're like, man, the one that I. Really wanted was this one so I can put.
[01:34:22]  And then, before you know it, you're working on a on a sleeve.
[01:34:26]  You're running out of canvas pretty soon you're.
[01:34:29]  Listen, this is the guy that had a bunch of procedures done on him and he's complaining that I got a fucking tattoo.
[01:34:35]  Come on, what if I don't like it?
[01:34:37]  Like like, my fear is it's.
[01:34:39]  I have a fear of commitment.
[01:34:40]  Like, what if I get something that's like trendy now and like five years from people from now?
[01:34:45]  People are like that's stupid.
[01:34:46]  What were you thinking like?
[01:34:47]  My brother actually got a tattoo, and it was that that you guys don't know what this is, That keep on trucking tattoo, where there's a guy walking towards you, in the front of his foot, on the bottom of the sole, it says, like, keep on trucking.
[01:35:00]  So his foot's real big.
[01:35:01]  And then he got another one of, like, Tweety Bird.
[01:35:04]  And he's got, like, these stupid tattoos that he later, I'm like, what were you doing?
[01:35:09]  He's like, it was cool at the time.
[01:35:11]  They had shirts.
[01:35:11]  And I'm like, yeah, but it's trendy.
[01:35:12]  He's like, yeah, but I didn't know that.
[01:35:14]  I didn't know it wasn't going to be cool later.
[01:35:17]  It's like, everything's just stupid.
[01:35:19]  Like, he's got all these ridiculous tattoos.
[01:35:21]  And then he's got other tattoos that are just like, Not him.
[01:35:24]  It's like you have a knife with a snake going through it.
[01:35:27]  Like you're not a biker.
[01:35:29]  I thought it was cool.
[01:35:30]  It's like, stop.

=== Prison Lawsuits and Settled Claims (11:05) ===

[01:35:31]  I saw a guy in prison getting his whole head, whole head, Louis Vuitton.
[01:35:36]  Really?
[01:35:37]  Like a purse.
[01:35:37]  And I had a guy, I actually drew out a bunch of it, and his whole sleeve was Louis Vuitton.
[01:35:44]  The pattern?
[01:35:45]  Yeah, the pattern.
[01:35:46]  I met him when he didn't have that.
[01:35:47]  And then I saw him in Oklahoma, and I'm like, what the fuck?
[01:35:50]  And he's like, yeah, I know, man.
[01:35:51]  I said, what were you thinking?
[01:35:53]  He's like, I don't know.
[01:35:55]  So well Louis Vuitton will hire you.
[01:35:57]  Yeah, you know, I mean you have a job there But yeah, the the the skull is a little bit too much and then you have the guys with the tears.
[01:36:04]  Yeah, yeah, they're sad They're very sad.
[01:36:07]  Yeah, it's a it's a it's a crazy world in there.
[01:36:11]  Yeah, I mean all the different prisons and pens that you went to What was like what was the worst one you were in?
[01:36:16]  What was the worst prison that you were in?
[01:36:18]  Obviously Coleman was probably the nicest one.
[01:36:20]  Oh Coleman was Coleman was the nicest one Coleman was pretty good.
[01:36:25]  We were talking about Coleman was great I mean, Coleman was pretty good.
[01:36:28]  I thought, listen, I thought it was great.
[01:36:30]  It started getting worse as time goes by.
[01:36:33]  The drugs, they started getting in all that.
[01:36:35]  K2, the K2 ruined it.
[01:36:37]  And then you had the state stopped picking up crimes.
[01:36:42]  So the feds were picking up these 18, 19, 20-year-old criminals for little shit that used to be state crimes before.
[01:36:49]  So we had a bunch of kids in the prison running around and picking up fights and, you know, doing stupid stuff.
[01:36:55]  But Coleman was good.
[01:36:57]  I'll say the last one, the one, the D. Ray James, the one where they had all the immigrants.
[01:37:01]  Because I was gonna say the ice facilities are the worst.
[01:37:04]  Ice facilities, you have no rights because you're an immigrant, basically, and you're getting punished twice by the staff.
[01:37:13]  See, in prison, the staff punishes you because you're a criminal.
[01:37:17]  So the guards look at you like, you know, the judge didn't give you enough time, so I'm gonna make your life fucking miserable.
[01:37:23]  Like, you know, we had what was the guy that used to wear the dreads?
[01:37:27]  The short black dude that used to, I don't know.
[01:37:30]  Black guy with dreads.
[01:37:31]  And, oh, gold teeth.
[01:37:33]  Gold teeth.
[01:37:34]  Well, you'll remember this one.
[01:37:35]  The black lady from the library, the library, Miss Johnson.
[01:37:38]  Oh, God.
[01:37:38]  Miss Johnson, Miss Whatever.
[01:37:40]  No, no.
[01:37:40]  Miss Johnson was nice.
[01:37:41]  Miss Johnson was nice.
[01:37:42]  You're talking about Miss Broad and she was the worst.
[01:37:44]  She was terrified.
[01:37:46]  She will tell you things.
[01:37:47]  Don't look at me in the eyes when you talk to me.
[01:37:48]  Don't look at me in the eyes.
[01:37:49]  Yeah, and lie.
[01:37:50]  She would write reports saying that you pushed her.
[01:37:53]  You pushed her, you hit her.
[01:37:56]  And guys would beat the Saunders.
[01:38:00]  Miss Saunders.
[01:38:02]  Guys would beat her.
[01:38:03]  If you're watching this, Miss Saunders, fuck you.
[01:38:04]  Yeah, you're a scumbag.
[01:38:06]  And people would, like, she would literally, she would, first she was bipolar.
[01:38:12]  Like, she was completely insane.
[01:38:14]  And so then she would write you up for something that didn't happen.
[01:38:18]  Try and get you thrown in the shoe.
[01:38:20]  Try and get your job taken away.
[01:38:21]  Like this was a psychotic chick.
[01:38:23]  And then say stuff like, he grabbed me.
[01:38:25]  He pushed me.
[01:38:26]  Well, they have a camera right there.
[01:38:28]  And so what happened was so many people complained after multiple people went to the shoe for nothing.
[01:38:34]  Eventually, they literally, she would say, go to the lieutenant's office right now.
[01:38:39]  I'm writing you up.
[01:38:39]  And I this.
[01:38:40]  But you'd get to the lieutenant's.
[01:38:41]  You'd walk in.
[01:38:41]  You'd go, hey, Ms. Saunders sent me down here.
[01:38:44]  And they'd go, Jesus.
[01:38:45]  Well, she said she's writing me a shot.
[01:38:47]  And they'd go, just go back to the unit.
[01:38:49]  Yeah, but she said she's writing a shot.
[01:38:51]  I'm going to quash this.
[01:38:52]  It sounds just like high school.
[01:38:53]  It is.
[01:38:54]  It's just like high school.
[01:38:55]  And not just that.
[01:38:56]  Look, a lot of the guards are hooked on Oxies.
[01:39:01]  Do you remember?
[01:39:02]  Oh, God.
[01:39:02]  Wait, do you remember?
[01:39:05]  Would you say the guards like their jobs?
[01:39:07]  Do you think they have.
[01:39:08]  I think they make good money.
[01:39:10]  I think they make good money.
[01:39:11]  Like, look, I liked the guards that were there because it was just a job.
[01:39:16]  And then there are the guards that actually, like, literally, they would pay to be there because they have an opportunity to be sadistic.
[01:39:22]  And it not catch up with them.
[01:39:24]  But I was just going to say, do you remember a guard by the name of Tippet white guy?
[01:39:30]  Super nice, you know what happened he, he was the guy that was always taking oh yeah yeah yeah, he was on, he was happy.
[01:39:37]  TSD yeah yeah yeah no no, but guess what happened?
[01:39:40]  So there was a huge case on uh from the, the females uh camp, saying that the guards were pressuring them to have sex and, and so they filed a lawsuit right against all these guards.
[01:39:53]  Tippet was named in the lawsuit, so Tippet Drives to Coleman on Christmas, or right around late December, I think.
[01:40:04]  Drives into Coleman in the parking lot, takes his revolver out, sticks it in his mouth, and blows his fucking brains out.
[01:40:11]  No way.
[01:40:12]  Yeah.
[01:40:13]  Damn.
[01:40:14]  This is that recent big lawsuit, right?
[01:40:16]  That all those girls.
[01:40:17]  The one that Jess came.
[01:40:18]  Yeah.
[01:40:18]  Is that what they turned into a mail camp, I guess?
[01:40:21]  They settled the lawsuit, by the way.
[01:40:22]  Did they really?
[01:40:23]  Yeah, the BOP settled it.
[01:40:25]  When did this happen?
[01:40:25]  A couple of months.
[01:40:27]  Five tunas?
[01:40:28]  Like a month or two ago, no, they were swimming for like 20 million, bro.
[01:40:31]  It was no joke.
[01:40:31]  Can we pull up the news on that?
[01:40:33]  The Coleman settlement, yeah.
[01:40:35]  They, I mean, listen, Tippett blew his brains up.
[01:40:37]  Like, Tippett was the nicest, yeah.
[01:40:39]  Tippett was like, if I had to say any guard you liked, who's the best guard that you ever were there and liked, and genuinely just like a nice guy.
[01:40:47]  Look, he wasn't sharp, he probably didn't have 100 IQ, but he was a nice guy.
[01:40:51]  And I think that's a problem.
[01:40:52]  If you are a nice guy and you go and you get that job, man, you're gonna end up, yeah.
[01:40:58]  Oh, there you go.
[01:40:59]  I don't know what they, what they, it was it.
[01:41:01]  Hey, what, what, what are you guys looking at?
[01:41:03]  We got ads.
[01:41:03]  We got two months.
[01:41:04]  We got two, three hours.
[01:41:04]  What the hell is that?
[01:41:06]  What is this?
[01:41:06]  Get Cialis for $5 a day?
[01:41:07]  What kind of stuff?
[01:41:08]  Sign me the fuck up.
[01:41:09]  What's your email?
[01:41:10]  Subscribe now.
[01:41:11]  Lawsuit settled in which 15 women alleged sexual abuse at Florida Prison Federal Correctional Facility Coleman.
[01:41:17]  I don't know what it was settled for, though.
[01:41:19]  I do know.
[01:41:19]  I was wondering how much.
[01:41:22]  United States has settled a lawsuit with 15 women who said.
[01:41:24]  Oh, 1.26 million.
[01:41:27]  Between 15, that's not bad.
[01:41:28]  Between 15, about 80,000 a pop.
[01:41:30]  Says 11 women.
[01:41:32]  11.
[01:41:32]  Oh, 11.
[01:41:33]  Only 11.
[01:41:34]  James DeMiles.
[01:41:36]  We need to get his ass on here.
[01:41:39]  Do you think Tibbet isn't getting any money?
[01:41:41]  She wasn't in there?
[01:41:42]  Is Jess a part of that lawsuit?
[01:41:44]  No, she was saying all those girls are lying.
[01:41:46]  She's like, those girls are lying.
[01:41:48]  That's right.
[01:41:49]  Huh?
[01:41:50]  Yeah, they were against you.
[01:41:51]  Oh, yeah.
[01:41:51]  So the girls we had on here, we had Jess and.
[01:41:53]  Oh, you have Jess in here?
[01:41:55]  And the other girl that was at Coleman, right?
[01:41:57]  Yeah, yeah.
[01:41:57]  And they were basically saying.
[01:41:59]  They were saying that's.
[01:42:00]  They were saying that's.
[01:42:01]  Their claim was the girls are fabricating the story and blowing it out of the water.
[01:42:05]  They're targeting.
[01:42:05]  A lot of the girls would target the guards.
[01:42:07]  Like, I'm going to start sleeping with him and I'm going to get him to bring me in stuff.
[01:42:12]  And they would do that.
[01:42:13]  And then they get a sentence reduction on top of that.
[01:42:16]  Yeah, most of these girls were out already.
[01:42:18]  Oh, okay.
[01:42:18]  But yeah, so they got out and a group of them got together and got an attorney and sued.
[01:42:23]  So it's.
[01:42:23]  Were you there when they took the pockets out of the shorts?
[01:42:26]  Yes.
[01:42:27]  We had a lawsuit in Coleman because I guess what we call the shooters.
[01:42:32]  No, gunners.
[01:42:32]  Gunners.
[01:42:33]  Gunners?
[01:42:34]  Guys would jack off.
[01:42:35]  Yeah, I mean, all guys jack off.
[01:42:38]  But the guys will do it like in front of the guards.
[01:42:40]  Or they put their hands in their pockets and they take off.
[01:42:42]  The female guard.
[01:42:42]  Yeah, the female.
[01:42:43]  Well, something will happen.
[01:42:44]  Or the male guard.
[01:42:46]  See?
[01:42:46]  And they will open the hole.
[01:42:48]  There's going to be a comment in the Thing.
[01:42:50]  I don't like the way you said that.
[01:42:52]  Yeah, yeah.
[01:42:53]  They don't like when I make fun of Matt.
[01:42:56]  Really?
[01:42:57]  Come on, rap.
[01:42:57]  Come on, let's go.
[01:42:59]  So the female guards ended up getting settled on that.
[01:43:02]  Oh, no, listen.
[01:43:03]  They made a bunch of money.
[01:43:04]  And they took all our pockets off.
[01:43:06]  We had to turn in our shorts, get our pockets taken off.
[01:43:09]  They took our pants off, and now we have to wear like the medical pants with the rubber bands.
[01:43:13]  You're missing the point.
[01:43:15]  That was the part about it.
[01:43:16]  This is my favorite part.
[01:43:17]  My favorite part is that.
[01:43:20]  That the female guards, like in the medium and in the pen, guys would jack off.
[01:43:25]  They would masturbate, you know, staring at some woman.
[01:43:28]  So, one guy, I want to say was in the pen, he actually is standing like behind the door and actually blows, you know, semen.
[01:43:38]  Should I say semen or nut?
[01:43:39]  So, anyway, fluids, body fluids.
[01:43:40]  He heats on her?
[01:43:41]  Yes, thank you.
[01:43:42]  He fucking blows a nut on her and it ends up on her pants leg.
[01:43:48]  She goes to the lieutenant and says, This guy, and this has been happening, by the way.
[01:43:52]  She's been complaining.
[01:43:53]  female guards have been complaining and the lieutenants are ignoring their complaints.
[01:43:58]  This is a female guard.
[01:43:59]  The lieutenants are ignoring them.
[01:44:00]  So she comes and she said, I've been telling you this and this, and this is what this guy just did.
[01:44:04]  And she goes, he just skeeted all over me.
[01:44:06]  And the lieutenant says, you're not medical staff.
[01:44:09]  You don't know what that is.
[01:44:11]  You're not trained to know what that is.
[01:44:12]  Now listen, she's a woman.
[01:44:14]  She's seen some.
[01:44:15]  She have had semen on her before.
[01:44:17]  Absolutely.
[01:44:18]  So I remember reading the article thinking, it makes me feel good that the lieutenants and the staff treat the staff. as shitty as they treat you.
[01:44:27]  That's the kind of stuff they'd say to you.
[01:44:29]  So the women get together and they sue.
[01:44:31]  They have this, it was like a $20 million settlement at the Coleman complex.
[01:44:37]  And in the settlement, they said, one, you guys have been ignoring this for a year.
[01:44:40]  And two, we want from one of the things we want you to do is take away all the inmates' pockets.
[01:44:47]  So they had to change out all the pants.
[01:44:50]  So we couldn't have pants, couldn't have belts.
[01:44:53]  You had rubber.
[01:44:55]  Yeah, the silky elastic.
[01:44:57]  No pants, no pockets.
[01:44:59]  I got no pockets.
[01:45:01]  Why do they always put those uniforms?
[01:45:02]  Oh my god.
[01:45:03]  Yeah, nobody's wearing stripes.
[01:45:05]  That's why they're there.
[01:45:06]  Is that what the pants look like?
[01:45:08]  No.
[01:45:08]  No.
[01:45:09]  That's what we're saying.
[01:45:10]  Nobody.
[01:45:11]  Yeah.
[01:45:11]  They're like.
[01:45:12]  Listen, if you go to my Facebook, I actually have some pictures in there.
[01:45:15]  Oh, in prison?
[01:45:16]  Yeah, 2005, 2014.
[01:45:17]  Yeah, they were ignored.
[01:45:19]  So it would have been in 2014 or 15 when they took away our pants or our pockets.
[01:45:25]  You can't.
[01:45:25]  There are guys jacking off so much that they take the pockets away.
[01:45:31]  With the rubber bands on the waist, you can yuck off.
[01:45:33]  Oh, 20 million right there.
[01:45:34]  $20 million settlement.
[01:45:36]  See it?
[01:45:36]  Throughout my shift, inmates were masturbating everywhere.
[01:45:41]  It felt like a free for all, one woman said.
[01:45:44]  According to court documents, I probably saw 25 to 30 inmates masturbating during one shift.
[01:45:50]  Which, let me put that in perspective.
[01:45:52]  There is 1,900 inmates in Coleman Low.
[01:45:54]  So, really, 25 guys masturbating is a very low number.
[01:45:59]  So, I don't think that's the low.
[01:46:01]  It speaks about the erectile dysfunction that exists in prison.
[01:46:05]  Yeah.
[01:46:06]  Yeah, which is the real problem.
[01:46:07]  It's a fair number.
[01:46:08]  I think, well, you know, I mean.
[01:46:10]  I think this wasn't the low.
[01:46:11]  I think this was probably more.
[01:46:13]  There is five of us here.
[01:46:14]  If you say, you know, during my interview, three guys were masturbating.
[01:46:17]  How many were there?
[01:46:18]  Five.
[01:46:19]  Shit, that's a high number.
[01:46:20]  Yeah.
[01:46:20]  But 25 out of 1,900?
[01:46:23]  You know.
[01:46:23]  That's probably standard.
[01:46:24]  Yeah, that's, yeah, that, yeah.
[01:46:26]  That's a day at the regular.
[01:46:27]  These guys, they cut a hole in the pocket.
[01:46:30]  They put their hands and they got a hole in the pocket.
[01:46:32]  Yeah.
[01:46:33]  How you doing, Ms. Johnson?
[01:46:35]  Yeah.

=== Sexual Dysfunction in Jail (05:54) ===

[01:46:37]  I was, I was black and white.
[01:46:39]  Yeah.
[01:46:39]  You know.
[01:46:40]  I, I, I, I want to sign up for the class.
[01:46:43]  That happens.
[01:46:43]  And that happened a lot in the real estate class.
[01:46:48]  That's fucking incredible.
[01:46:49]  Yeah, it was unbelievable.
[01:46:50]  You get some characters in prison, and then you sit there masturbating in front of the prison.
[01:46:54]  It's ridiculous.
[01:46:56]  It makes masturbating in front of the prison more difficult, but not impossible.
[01:47:01]  More difficult.
[01:47:02]  You do understand.
[01:47:04]  You understand the things we're talking about?
[01:47:06]  Imagine that's your life.
[01:47:08]  This is your life, being around guys that are literally you're sitting there doing work at the library, and you look over, and some guy's staring through a window at a female secretary going yeah, and you're like this guy and you got it and you're teaching GED.
[01:47:25]  Yeah, and you're like listen guys pay attention here Don't look at the masturbator pay attention right here, right?
[01:47:29]  You know algebra fellas.
[01:47:30]  That's that's your life.
[01:47:32]  Yeah, that's it's a so so you get out and you are not Yeah, you're not normal there everything the world you see the world through through different lenses, you know Does it get better Matt?
[01:47:43]  I'll let you know?
[01:47:45]  How long have you been out for what three years?
[01:47:48]  Two years three years two years I've been out two years.
[01:47:50]  So what happened is so it and I say this is that Literally, of course, I gradually went, I lived in someone's spare room.
[01:47:59]  So I have a little tiny space.
[01:48:02]  So, I mean, my world has slowly gotten bigger.
[01:48:06]  And, like, even sleeping, literally.
[01:48:10]  Oh, I didn't tell you.
[01:48:10]  This is good.
[01:48:11]  So, Stacey, I stayed at Stacey's, right?
[01:48:13]  Yeah.
[01:48:14]  She had a room and she had a closet.
[01:48:19]  I put my bed in the closet.
[01:48:21]  That was a huge closet.
[01:48:23]  In the closet, And I used to sleep in the closet.
[01:48:28]  And when I put my bed, I said, Well, I'm going to put my bed in here.
[01:48:30]  Oh, because I said, I'm going to have this my art studio.
[01:48:32]  And she goes, Well, why don't you use the closet for the, and why don't you, we can move.
[01:48:36]  I go, No, no, I want to put it in there.
[01:48:38]  It fits in there.
[01:48:38]  It's good.
[01:48:38]  She's like, It's so tiny.
[01:48:40]  And I go, It's twice as big as my cell.
[01:48:43]  As a matter of fact, bring the toilet.
[01:48:45]  Yeah, I was like, Right.
[01:48:46]  And she was like, You can't be serious.
[01:48:48]  I'm like, I feel comfortable.
[01:48:50]  I slept great in that room.
[01:48:52]  I felt, Jess would come over.
[01:48:54]  She'd sleep.
[01:48:54]  She would be like, It's really.
[01:48:56]  Comfortable when you're in it and I was like it's weird right, and so then then eventually I moved into a bedroom and then you have to think too.
[01:49:03]  For the first six months to a year, I had this constant feeling like they're gonna come get me any minute.
[01:49:09]  Yeah like remember, I told you like I miss my friends.
[01:49:12]  I think about my friends in prison.
[01:49:14]  Like to me, this is temporary.
[01:49:17]  I should be back in Coleman, like I was, like I, it wouldn't bother me at all if I went back to like the end of Shawshank Redemption yeah, and you yeah yeah, look at this, you end up getting out and you reach out to the people That you did time with, that you were actually hanging out with inside, you know.
[01:49:34]  So they end up connecting sooner or later because it's the people that understand you.
[01:49:38]  Right.
[01:49:39]  You speak the same language.
[01:49:41]  Sometimes when I say some things, like with my daughters, I talk I have to explain what I mean all the time like, or I was telling my, the other day I was at the doctor and my one of my kids called me and I said i'm in medical, and they're like what?
[01:49:54]  And I said oh, i'm not the doctor, i'm not in medical, you know.
[01:49:58]  Or one of them has a backyard and I keep saying it, the rec yard.
[01:50:02]  And i'm like yeah, let's go to the rec yard.
[01:50:03]  I'm like no, the backyard, the backyard is not the rec yard.
[01:50:06]  What about what you said with your, your girlfriend?
[01:50:08]  You were like.
[01:50:09]  You were like oh, If somebody had talked to me like that when I was in prison.
[01:50:13]  Listen.
[01:50:13]  Yeah, that's when you start arguing.
[01:50:15]  Well, it's funny that you said about the closet.
[01:50:17]  I got into an argument the other day, man, and I was so pissed.
[01:50:20]  And I'm like, you know what?
[01:50:21]  I'm going to lock myself in the fucking closet so I can think.
[01:50:24]  And she's like, dude, what?
[01:50:26]  I said, yeah, this is too much space here.
[01:50:28]  I just cannot get my head straight because you want confinement.
[01:50:32]  And then when people talk to you, you cannot snap at them.
[01:50:35]  Like, what?
[01:50:37]  You start thinking, if this bitch talked like that to me in prison, I would have stab her!
[01:50:42]  Remember the thing?
[01:50:42]  Well, I'm not stabbing anybody, but I tell you what, the one thing is, it's please and thank you.
[01:50:46]  Oh my God.
[01:50:47]  When I first went into prison, like, nobody's saying please or thank you because that's soft.
[01:50:50]  You're soft.
[01:50:51]  Like, first of all, like, I put no bass in my voice.
[01:50:56]  I'm talking normal.
[01:50:56]  In prison, it's what's up?
[01:50:58]  Hey, yeah, so listen.
[01:50:59]  Hey, let me get some sugar.
[01:51:01]  Like, any type of sweetener is sugar.
[01:51:04]  Like, any type of, like, listen, I can't even, I'm not even going to go into this.
[01:51:08]  It's so stupid.
[01:51:09]  Like, they don't have, they call sweatshirts sweaters.
[01:51:13]  And they're like, hey, Uh, let me get a sweater.
[01:51:15]  I'm like, it's not a sweater, it's a sweatshirt.
[01:51:18]  So, you realize very quickly, no, they're all sweaters, you know, they're all and there's all these things.
[01:51:23]  And you they stop saying please and thank you, that's off the window.
[01:51:26]  If you do that, you're soft.
[01:51:27]  If you're soft, you're basically a victim.
[01:51:30]  So, you stop saying that.
[01:51:31]  So, then I get out here and I'm like, hey, let me get some coffee.
[01:51:35]  It's like, please, please, would you like some?
[01:51:39]  And I you start realizing, I can't talk like that.
[01:51:41]  Like, I'm an asshole.
[01:51:43]  That's how my two year old like, I was kind of an asshole when I went in.
[01:51:47]  I'm really an asshole.
[01:51:48]  At least I said please and thank you.
[01:51:50]  So it took a lot.
[01:51:51]  Like, I really, and so I try to have to do overly be polite.
[01:51:55]  Like, hey, I really appreciate it.
[01:51:56]  Hey, thank you.
[01:51:57]  So now, like, we were talking about going through the Starbucks.
[01:52:00]  Yeah.
[01:52:01]  I'm real overly, I don't just order.
[01:52:04]  I'm like, you know, hey, how are you doing today?
[01:52:05]  Like, I have to really push myself to try and be sweet and nice and superficial charm.
[01:52:10]  Absolutely.
[01:52:11]  But I have to make that superficial charm.
[01:52:12]  It's called faking sincerity.
[01:52:14]  Right.
[01:52:15]  If you can do that, you got it made.
[01:52:17]  You got it made.
[01:52:17]  You can sell anything.
[01:52:18]  Yeah.
[01:52:19]  So I have to really do that.
[01:52:21]  Hearing aids or hand grenades.
[01:52:22]  Jess laughs all the time.
[01:52:25]  She's like, what are you doing?
[01:52:27]  You're so, I'm talking to every, trying to really make myself be sociable again.

=== Consequences of Wrongdoing (04:05) ===

[01:52:32]  Yeah.
[01:52:33]  Because you're just not when you come out.
[01:52:34]  No.
[01:52:35]  I'm so comfortable being alone.
[01:52:37]  But when you are with a convict, it's okay.
[01:52:41]  Like I went to your house the other day and I'm like opening the fucking cabinet, getting a glass and I'm getting like, which was great because I don't offer anybody shit.
[01:52:48]  Yeah.
[01:52:48]  And I know, listen, if I walked into his cell, I was going to open his locker and if he had some chips, I was going to eat them.
[01:52:52]  You know what I mean?
[01:52:52]  Right.
[01:52:53]  But then, he had people there and they're sitting there like hey, can we, can we?
[01:52:56]  I'm like yeah, grab that shed, is it yours?
[01:52:59]  No, if it's there, it's tweeted, you know, otherwise we'll hide it, you know, because that's kind of like how it is in prison, if it's on the table, it's for everybody, right?
[01:53:06]  If you don't want people to eat it, then you hide it, you know.
[01:53:09]  So, now that you're a free man somewhat free, now you're, you're a free man.
[01:53:13]  This is America, the land of the free right and the home of the brave.
[01:53:17]  Yeah, this is the freest country in the world.
[01:53:19]  Right, it's super free.
[01:53:20]  Yeah, one percent of our society is locked up More people per capita, I think, than any other country.
[01:53:25]  Is that right?
[01:53:26]  Than any other country in the world.
[01:53:27]  So they set you free, and now you got to walk through basically a minefield to make sure you don't end up back in prison.
[01:53:36]  How long are you on probation?
[01:53:37]  The probation officer wants you to make payments to restitution, but he can't work.
[01:53:41]  Yeah.
[01:53:41]  Like, how am I going to do that?
[01:53:42]  He called me yesterday.
[01:53:42]  He's like, dude, you haven't made any payments on your probation, on your restitution.
[01:53:46]  I said, I can't work.
[01:53:49]  He goes, ah, you're still on that, huh?
[01:53:51]  I said, yeah, man, I don't have a work permit.
[01:53:55]  I don't have a driver's license.
[01:53:57]  If you get me one, I'll Uber the shit out of this thing.
[01:54:01]  But he's like, ah, man, I don't know.
[01:54:04]  He goes, how about, you know, like getting a job and getting paid like cash, you know, under the table?
[01:54:12]  I'm like, wait a second.
[01:54:13]  No, that's a federal offense.
[01:54:15]  That violates immigration law.
[01:54:17]  Yeah.
[01:54:18]  Oh, yeah, I guess it does.
[01:54:19]  I guess it does.
[01:54:20]  I'm like, yeah, man, no.
[01:54:22]  Listen, if I'm going to do shit, I'm going to do shit right here by the way.
[01:54:23]  Did your probation officer say that to you?
[01:54:25]  They don't think.
[01:54:27]  They talk.
[01:54:29]  They're not familiar with what goes on once you get out.
[01:54:32]  They're not familiar with what goes on once you're in there.
[01:54:35]  A lot of people think that we got prepared to be out, and we don't.
[01:54:38]  Nobody talks to you.
[01:54:39]  Nobody tells you, listen, this is what you're going to face when you get out.
[01:54:41]  It's like, listen, you're out.
[01:54:43]  And how do I get home?
[01:54:44]  I don't know how you're going to get home.
[01:54:45]  That's your fucking problem.
[01:54:46]  You're out.
[01:54:46]  You get a job and then places, dude, to find a place to leave.
[01:54:50]  I mean, I haven't crossed that bridge yet, but when I've tried, they used to test the waters.
[01:54:56]  That he's lucky he has family here.
[01:54:58]  If he didn't have family here, he's sleeping on a park bench somewhere.
[01:55:02]  Yeah, because what's it like to find a place to rent and then you have to get another background check?
[01:55:07]  It's impossible.
[01:55:07]  Because they go, listen, we're going to do a background check.
[01:55:10]  Have you committed a crime?
[01:55:10]  And I'm like, well, you know, it's white collar.
[01:55:13]  And I'm like, well, yeah, no, it doesn't matter if it's white collar.
[01:55:15]  Right, you know, I mean, I had somebody that took 300.
[01:55:17]  I told the story, I think, in your podcast.
[01:55:18]  He took, I said, Listen, I have a federal criminal record.
[01:55:24]  Oh, don't worry about it.
[01:55:25]  He said, He said, He said, Sexual.
[01:55:27]  He said, I said, like, uh, you know, child abuse.
[01:55:30]  Are you a child molester?
[01:55:31]  Right.
[01:55:32]  No, I'm like, Listen, it's I'm white collar.
[01:55:34]  Right, right.
[01:55:35]  Oh, yeah, you shouldn't have a problem.
[01:55:36]  Yeah, I said, Okay, you know.
[01:55:38]  So she runs, she takes my 300 bucks.
[01:55:41]  Yeah, non refundable for the application.
[01:55:44]  Then she calls me back.
[01:55:45]  She's like, We run your criminal record and we cannot take you because you have a record.
[01:55:49]  I said, Shit, I told you I had a record.
[01:55:51]  She goes, Yeah, but we didn't know that it will show up.
[01:55:54]  It's a fucking federal record.
[01:55:56]  You know, why wouldn't it show up?
[01:55:57]  She's like, Yeah, I said, dude.
[01:55:58]  You know, I think people were laughing at your podcast because I said, Fuck, I'm not a child molester, but I think I just got molested.
[01:56:03]  Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah.
[01:56:04]  You know, yeah, I mean, it happens all the time.
[01:56:07]  To open a bank account, the same thing.
[01:56:09]  Everywhere you go, you have the stigma of being a convict.
[01:56:14]  So what some convicts do, like me or Matt or other friends that I have, is they actually take that, And they use it to their advantage.
[01:56:21]  You know, you use it to do good instead of bad.
[01:56:25]  As crazy as it sounds, and the fact that we're talking about this in podcasts like yours, it's good that people know behind the phone and behind that other stuff, man, that if you do the wrong thing, you are going to end up in prison.

=== Stigma of Being a Convict (15:27) ===

[01:56:38]  Period.
[01:56:38]  Not if, ands, or buts.
[01:56:40]  Yeah, 10 years from now, you'll get out and you'll be at a concrete and you'll tell some jokes and you're like, oh my God, yeah, I remember.
[01:56:47]  Is it worth the 10 years?
[01:56:49]  Absolutely not.
[01:56:51]  But, you know, so what we're trying to do is.
[01:56:54]  We're trying to, I think, expose one side of the system that a lot of people don't see.
[01:57:00]  You know?
[01:57:01]  Like I was telling somebody the other day the good thing about being a convicted felon is that I can talk about my crime.
[01:57:08]  I can say, listen, I did this and I did this and I did this and I was convicted.
[01:57:12]  There's a bunch of people breaking the law right now.
[01:57:14]  And I see them on late night TV and I see them on podcasts.
[01:57:18]  And I'm like, oh my God, this guy is getting a bunch of fucking people indicted if they do what he's all this zero down real estate stuff and all these NPP loans and PPP loans.
[01:57:31]  PPP loans, yeah.
[01:57:31]  And all this, you know, I see them online all the time.
[01:57:34]  I'm like, man, these people are going to get a bunch of people fucked.
[01:57:37]  They are getting a bunch of people fucked right now.
[01:57:40]  You know how many Boziak said, I don't know what it was.
[01:57:44]  He was like five.
[01:57:45]  He's basically paid like $250 or $300 to like five or six different places that have just taken his money.
[01:57:52]  In areas for application fees, application fees.
[01:57:54]  He was just, he is like, I'm, I walk in, I'm like, Look, this is what's going on.
[01:57:58]  Boom, boom, boom.
[01:57:59]  You'll be fine.
[01:58:00]  You'll be fine.
[01:58:01]  No, we've had this problem.
[01:58:02]  No problem.
[01:58:02]  No problem.
[01:58:03]  Filled it out.
[01:58:03]  Bam.
[01:58:03]  They just take my money.
[01:58:05]  Because it happens over and over again.
[01:58:06]  I don't think the full skull tattoo helps his case.
[01:58:09]  No, no.
[01:58:10]  Yeah.
[01:58:10]  Yeah.
[01:58:11]  But he didn't look, he was like Justin Bieber when he was in prison, right?
[01:58:14]  I mean, this was like, I've said that.
[01:58:16]  This was like, Oh, you saw before the tattoos?
[01:58:17]  Yeah.
[01:58:18]  Well, he had like the rock star thing, right?
[01:58:20]  And he had like a couple of them, but then he showed me a picture.
[01:58:24]  I was like, Dude, what the fuck happened?
[01:58:26]  Did he join a gang?
[01:58:27]  When he got out of prison, he did it backwards.
[01:58:30]  Remember when I said I wrote an article about how Trump had signed an executive order where he was going to deport all the Puerto Ricans that had convictions?
[01:58:42]  Oh my God, you told that story here?
[01:58:44]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:58:45]  Why did you write that article again?
[01:58:46]  Okay, because I was laying in bed one night and there were a bunch of Puerto Ricans, like 11 30 at night.
[01:58:51]  We're supposed to be asleep, but these bunch of Puerto Ricans were in front of my cell and they're all like, how did that happen?
[01:58:55]  How did you know they're Puerto Rican?
[01:58:57]  Oh, because they're Puerto Ricans.
[01:58:58]  They're Puerto Ricans.
[01:58:59]  How do you decipher a Puerto Rican from a Mexican?
[01:59:02]  Well, because a Mexican has a job.
[01:59:04]  Okay, so.
[01:59:05]  No, I'm asking a serious question.
[01:59:06]  In prison.
[01:59:06]  Accent?
[01:59:07]  You can see.
[01:59:07]  Really?
[01:59:08]  First of all, you can see.
[01:59:08]  Cliques, they hang out together.
[01:59:10]  Okay.
[01:59:10]  Yeah.
[01:59:11]  But the key is everybody has a number.
[01:59:13]  So the Hispanics segregate?
[01:59:15]  Yes.
[01:59:16]  We're not all created equal.
[01:59:17]  Yeah.
[01:59:18]  So they're going, and I know most of these guys.
[01:59:20]  They're in 50 shades of brown.
[01:59:21]  The 180 people.
[01:59:23]  There's 180 people.
[01:59:24]  I know who the Mexicans are.
[01:59:26]  I know who the black guys are.
[01:59:27]  I know who.
[01:59:28]  I know who's from Miami.
[01:59:29]  I know, you know.
[01:59:30]  So these guys are, I was like trying to go to sleep.
[01:59:33]  And, you know, the whole thing is it's like, it's not the kind of place where you can go, hey, you guys, can you please move?
[01:59:38]  Because now it's, now they're screaming at you.
[01:59:41]  And if you scream back, now you got a major problem.
[01:59:43]  It's a huge problem.
[01:59:44]  So you lay there, you put something over your head, you put some earplugs in.
[01:59:47]  But I'm laying there and I'm thinking, man, I wish these fucking guys would just go.
[01:59:52]  And I thought, man, I really wish they'd all just go back to Puerto Rico.
[01:59:56]  And then I sat there and I thought, you know, and I thought, oh, that'd be great.
[02:00:00]  And then I thought, you know what?
[02:00:03]  Trump could send him back.
[02:00:05]  And I thought, that's what I'm going to do.
[02:00:08]  I'm going to have Trump send him back tomorrow.
[02:00:11]  So I go to the library the next morning and I write up an article that says that Trump has just signed Executive Order 720514 12 and that all any Puerto Ricans that were born in Puerto Rico that came to the United States that have a felony conviction are being deported.
[02:00:31]  And then I go in and I add in quotes from the director of the Bureau of the Federal Bureau of Prisons from what was that?
[02:00:40]  The old U.S. Attorney or the Attorney General Barr?
[02:00:45]  No, no, no.
[02:00:46]  There wasn't prior to him.
[02:00:47]  Yeah, Sessions.
[02:00:49]  I put in a bunch of quotes from Sessions saying it's perfectly legal.
[02:00:53]  I put a quote in from, you know, saying they gave numbers.
[02:00:55]  Currently, there is like 45,000 Puerto Ricans.
[02:00:58]  Out of them, 28,000 are deportable.
[02:01:00]  I looked up like all the things.
[02:01:01]  I looked up the name of the agreement where Puerto Rico became.
[02:01:09]  A possession, like why they became a possession.
[02:01:12]  Like I had every, this is a huge article.
[02:01:13]  It took me hours to write it up.
[02:01:15]  Then I read it over a few times.
[02:01:18]  I really did.
[02:01:18]  You went to Adobe Photoshop so you can Photoshop the CNN logo on top of it?
[02:01:22]  I don't have nothing like that.
[02:01:23]  So I write it down.
[02:01:24]  We had a copy machine.
[02:01:25]  That was the closest thing we had.
[02:01:26]  So I write it all up.
[02:01:27]  That works.
[02:01:28]  And there was a guy who ran a, basically, there's a lawyer that everybody signed up to that sends out like a newsletter.
[02:01:36]  So I basically made it.
[02:01:38]  It was named Jeremy Gordon.
[02:01:39]  So I put it in Jeremy Gordon's recent newsletter, changed the name of the inmate it was sent to.
[02:01:47]  Whoever he was signed up to.
[02:01:49]  And then, so it looks like it was a printout, like it went to him.
[02:01:51]  He printed it out on his computer and it came from Jeremy Gordon and he printed it out on his computer.
[02:01:59]  And so that's just what it looks like.
[02:02:01]  Like it's this is an article from, this is an article Gordon.
[02:02:03]  Legit.
[02:02:04]  Well, legit article that was in the New York Times that Jeremy Gordon is, and it's a part of his newsletter.
[02:02:11]  I had other things that Gordon had talked about.
[02:02:13]  So I then go make a bunch of copies of it and I post it on.
[02:02:18]  The bulletin board.
[02:02:19]  I then go to some guy and I go, hey, bro.
[02:02:22]  I said you know, you got, you know your buddy.
[02:02:24]  He's a Puerto Rican guy, right?
[02:02:25]  I said is he seeing this?
[02:02:26]  And he goes no, what is that?
[02:02:27]  Yeah listen, what's happening.
[02:02:28]  He goes, holy yeah, you need to show so-and-so walk away.
[02:02:32]  He shows it to so-and-so listen.
[02:02:34]  You just lit the fire.
[02:02:35]  Lit the fire, then I actually took fake news, I put it in all of these different, I put it in all the different units like, and I don't hear anything about it.
[02:02:44]  Probably the next day or the day two days later i'm standing in the chow hall line And there's two, a couple of white guys or something sitting in front of me, going, man, I hope they send them all back.
[02:02:55]  And I'm thinking, what are they talking about?
[02:02:57]  They're going back and forth.
[02:02:57]  He's like, yeah.
[02:02:58]  Well, I mean, they come here.
[02:02:59]  They commit crimes.
[02:03:00]  But they're U.S. citizens.
[02:03:01]  You can't just send them back.
[02:03:02]  Trump can do it.
[02:03:03]  Trump's already done deal.
[02:03:05]  It's a done deal.
[02:03:06]  It can't be legal.
[02:03:07]  And I'm thinking, oh, my God.
[02:03:08]  They're talking about this.
[02:03:09]  This is like, these aren't even Puerto Rican guys.
[02:03:11]  Listen, by the time I get back to the unit, by the end of the day, there have been, I've heard 10 different conversations about it.
[02:03:18]  I walk in.
[02:03:19]  There is a whole group of Puerto Ricans together.
[02:03:22]  And there's one of them reading it over and translating it for the other ones.
[02:03:26]  They're going nuts.
[02:03:27]  Another day goes by.
[02:03:29]  He comes up to me in the library one day.
[02:03:31]  I'm sitting there.
[02:03:32]  He comes up.
[02:03:32]  He sits there and he goes, what's going on?
[02:03:34]  Because you were teaching GED, right?
[02:03:35]  Yeah.
[02:03:36]  And I go, hey, what's going on?
[02:03:36]  And he goes, listen, man.
[02:03:38]  He said, you heard this thing about Trump and he signed this executive order?
[02:03:43]  And I went, he goes, yeah, yeah.
[02:03:45]  He said, they're going crazy, man.
[02:03:47]  I go, okay, listen, man.
[02:03:49]  I got to tell you something.
[02:03:50]  I just swear to God, because now I'm getting nervous, by the way.
[02:03:53]  It's gone so viral throughout the prison.
[02:03:55]  I'm now starting to think.
[02:03:57]  They're gonna throw me in the shoes like that because there is a side of the story that Matt was not a participant of because he doesn't speak Spanish Yeah, but they're coming to me because I'm the paperwork guy.
[02:04:07]  Yeah, yeah, and they're like hey Venezuela Venezuela come here.
[02:04:09]  Yeah, check this out and I'm reading it.
[02:04:12]  I'm like This doesn't make any sense.
[02:04:14]  You're an American fucking citizen.
[02:04:15]  How that's like saying they're gonna deport you to Alabama.
[02:04:18]  Yeah, that doesn't work like that.
[02:04:20]  I don't know man.
[02:04:20]  I don't know cuz you know my sister She heard about it on Telemundo and I'm like god she did and they're like yeah, yeah, yeah, and then somebody's like Yeah, CNN last night.
[02:04:31]  Remember, we were on the TV room and they're like, oh my God, yeah.
[02:04:33]  And I'm like, man, this doesn't make any sense.
[02:04:34]  None of that happens.
[02:04:35]  They're making it up.
[02:04:36]  They're just exploding.
[02:04:37]  Yeah.
[02:04:38]  People are calling their moms.
[02:04:39]  Mom, you need to talk to my attorney.
[02:04:40]  I cannot go back to Puerto Rico.
[02:04:42]  I testified.
[02:04:43]  They're going to kill me there.
[02:04:44]  Yeah.
[02:04:45]  The counselors are walking out, calling the Hispanics.
[02:04:49]  We got a town hall.
[02:04:50]  Guys, we're doing our research.
[02:04:52]  We have not gotten any news from the BOP that this is going to happen.
[02:04:56]  You need to slow down.
[02:04:57]  It's a whole game.
[02:04:58]  I mean, I'm getting scared.
[02:05:00]  So now you understand they'll, they'll like, they'll really.
[02:05:04]  So when I go to Matt, I'm like, dude, have you read this shit?
[02:05:06]  What the fuck is this?
[02:05:07]  It doesn't make any sense.
[02:05:08]  And I'm like, you have to swear you will not.
[02:05:11]  And he's like, what?
[02:05:12]  And I go, listen, you cannot, don't, I mean, like, you can't go and tell your buddy and you think, oh, he won't tell anybody.
[02:05:18]  Do you understand?
[02:05:18]  You can't tell anybody.
[02:05:20]  And he's like, all right, what, what?
[02:05:21]  And I go, so I wrote the fucking article and I put it into, and he goes, no, my God, what did you do?
[02:05:28]  He goes, he looked at me and he goes, that's brilliant.
[02:05:33]  These guys are going nuts.
[02:05:35]  And I go, I'm telling you, brother.
[02:05:36]  I said, you know what you need to do?
[02:05:37]  And he goes, what?
[02:05:38]  I go, you need to tell all of them that you can file the paperwork to get them.
[02:05:44]  To stay here, like where they will not deport them because they're in trouble.
[02:05:48]  I said, Tell them to send you $125 and you get the paperwork.
[02:05:52]  And I said, You'll file it for them.
[02:05:54]  And he goes, And I said, We'll write up a form.
[02:05:58]  And we'll.
[02:05:58]  And he's like, I can't do that.
[02:06:02]  I'm like, Do you know how much money you've got?
[02:06:04]  He goes, Oh, are you kidding me?
[02:06:05]  Yeah.
[02:06:05]  $10,000.
[02:06:07]  He goes, There's hundreds of these guys.
[02:06:08]  They're going nuts.
[02:06:09]  Matt, you would make a great CNN or Fox executive.
[02:06:12]  Yeah.
[02:06:14]  Well, years later, I'm out of prison.
[02:06:16]  He's been out for two and a half years and I missed all the politics and all the shit.
[02:06:20]  I was in prison, you know?
[02:06:22]  And I'm hearing this fake news stuff.
[02:06:25]  So they're like, oh, it's all fake news.
[02:06:26]  It's all fake news.
[02:06:27]  And I'm trying to figure out what the fuck is fake news.
[02:06:29]  So I'm watching the newscast and I'm like, I tell my brother, dude, I got to tell you a story about fake news in prison.
[02:06:37]  My friend Matt.
[02:06:38]  And I'm telling him the story.
[02:06:39]  I'm like, that's the first time I heard of fake news.
[02:06:41]  It's really the same thing that's going on in the real world.
[02:06:44]  It's just on a grander scale.
[02:06:46]  Yeah.
[02:06:46]  That's very interesting.
[02:06:47]  Prison is like a micro, you know?
[02:06:50]  System of what society is like.
[02:06:53]  And it's the same thing.
[02:06:53]  You have a percentage of people that have money.
[02:06:55]  You have a percentage of people that are broke.
[02:06:57]  You have the drug lords employing the broke people.
[02:07:03]  And I used to tell my brother, man, this was Coleman, though.
[02:07:05]  And the media executives like Matt Cox that are the media executives.
[02:07:09]  To his defense, Matt did not employ slaves.
[02:07:13]  Okay.
[02:07:13]  Well, he doesn't want to.
[02:07:15]  But there were several inmates that did.
[02:07:19]  So there will be like this.
[02:07:22]  Gizillionaire drug lords, you know, $150 million, $200 million in the bank.
[02:07:26]  They will sit there and they will call me, hey, Venezuela, come here.
[02:07:29]  So I'll sit there and say, yeah, what's up?
[02:07:31]  Man, listen, can you translate this for me?
[02:07:33]  And I'll be like, yeah, I'll translate it for you.
[02:07:34]  Do you want anything to eat?
[02:07:38]  Sure, hold on one second.
[02:07:40]  Pedro, come here for a second.
[02:07:41]  So this guy will show up.
[02:07:42]  Yes.
[02:07:43]  What do we have to eat?
[02:07:44]  Like a waiter, bro.
[02:07:45]  It's another inmate.
[02:07:46]  Well, we have pizzas, we have burritos, we have well, dude, I'll take a burrito.
[02:07:51]  Give the man a burrito.
[02:07:52]  You want anything to drink?
[02:07:53]  All right, what do you have to drink?
[02:07:54]  Well, Sprite Coke.
[02:07:55]  Dude, give me a Sprite.
[02:07:57]  With ice?
[02:07:57]  Yeah, with ice.
[02:07:58]  All right.
[02:07:58]  So the guy will leave and come back with the Sprite and the burrito and the whole thing.
[02:08:01]  I mean, they had it.
[02:08:02]  Yeah.
[02:08:03]  I mean, keep my stuff.
[02:08:03]  He doesn't have it in his cell.
[02:08:05]  This guy's keeping his stuff.
[02:08:07]  So he's putting money on multiple people's books.
[02:08:10]  He's using multiple people's phones.
[02:08:13]  You can only have 300 minutes.
[02:08:15]  So he's, you don't have any money.
[02:08:17]  So here's what you're going to do I'm going to put money on your books.
[02:08:19]  You're going to go to commissary for me.
[02:08:21]  You're going to get some commissary.
[02:08:23]  I'm going to use your phone minutes because you barely call anybody.
[02:08:26]  You can use some of them.
[02:08:27]  And you're going to cook for me, and then you'll clean my room.
[02:08:30]  I'm going to put money on your books.
[02:08:31]  You're going to go to commissary.
[02:08:32]  You're going to make my bed.
[02:08:33]  You're going to clean my cell.
[02:08:34]  You're going to do all my laundry.
[02:08:35]  You'll do this.
[02:08:36]  You'll do that.
[02:08:37]  Like this guy never goes to commissary.
[02:08:38]  He never really has to leave the unit.
[02:08:40]  All of his stuff is pressed and done.
[02:08:43]  Everything's taken care of.
[02:08:44]  For prison, you're still in prison, but you're living like a king.
[02:08:47]  Yeah.
[02:08:48]  You are the upper class of the bougie.
[02:08:52]  And you're renting out other people's locker space because you have to live out of a little tiny locker.
[02:08:57]  Right.
[02:08:57]  So you just have commissary spread throughout the whole prison.
[02:09:00]  Right, right.
[02:09:00]  So you're going to keep my stuff.
[02:09:02]  You're going to keep my stuff.
[02:09:03]  Like, he probably has almost nothing in his locker.
[02:09:05]  Like, my locker was packed with crap.
[02:09:07]  But I'll tell you my first shocking story in prison, which a lot of people ask me.
[02:09:12]  I get to Miami.
[02:09:14]  My cell is Puerto Rican.
[02:09:15]  Speaking of Puerto Ricans.
[02:09:17]  And he goes, Listen, Venezuela, I need you to stand outside because I'm loaded.
[02:09:22]  And I said, What do you mean you are loaded?
[02:09:23]  He goes, Yeah, I got some.
[02:09:25]  I said, Like drugs?
[02:09:28]  He goes, No, no, no, no.
[02:09:28]  I said, Dude, why are you carrying?
[02:09:31]  What's going on?
[02:09:31]  He goes, Well, I have a cell phone.
[02:09:33]  I said, Where do you have it?
[02:09:34]  He goes, I have it on my ass.
[02:09:35]  In his prison purse.
[02:09:36]  I said, Shut the fuck up.
[02:09:37]  Up, you have a cell phone up your ass?
[02:09:39]  He goes, Yeah, what kind of cell phone?
[02:09:41]  I said, Well, I said, I'm like, I'm not, is this an iPhone?
[02:09:45]  I said, I'm not, I'm not stepping out, bro.
[02:09:47]  You're gonna pull that shit out right now?
[02:09:49]  He goes, Yeah, I said, I want to see it.
[02:09:50]  I want to see it.
[02:09:51]  He goes, Come on, bro.
[02:09:52]  I said, No, bro, I've never seen this before.
[02:09:55]  I don't believe, first of all, I don't believe you.
[02:09:56]  Yeah, he goes, All right, man.
[02:09:58]  So he gets another Puerto Rican to watch it, and I'm sitting on my bed, and this guy's like pushing his stomach, and he's like, and out of the sudden, here comes this phone, bro.
[02:10:08]  Puck and I'm sitting there going oh my god But the guy's still sitting and he's still pushing and I go dude you got two phones and he goes what shut up bro?
[02:10:20]  Shut up Puck the charger no, and I said oh my god the charger Of course, how do you think I was gonna charge the phone bro?
[02:10:30]  Oh my god.
[02:10:31]  I would have never thought about putting the charger on my ass.
[02:10:33]  I would have been the only idiot with a phone and no battery.
[02:10:38]  He's like yeah, of course and they keep it up their ass All day, bro.
[02:10:43]  All day.
[02:10:44]  And not little phones.
[02:10:45]  I mean, we're talking about a decent size phone.
[02:10:48]  iPhone 11 Pro Max.
[02:10:52]  What the hell is going on?
[02:10:55]  A tablet.
[02:10:56]  Yeah, give me an iPad.
[02:10:58]  Yeah, that was impressive.
[02:11:01]  Jesus Christ.
[02:11:02]  That was impressive.
[02:11:03]  I was like, man.
[02:11:03]  I've heard those stories before, but not in that kind of video.
[02:11:05]  No, no, no.
[02:11:06]  Listen, it's.
[02:11:08]  And so I had to ask.
[02:11:09]  I was like, you guys, I'm like, listen, let's sit down.
[02:11:11]  Let's talk about this.
[02:11:12]  Right, right.
[02:11:13]  How, how, at what point did you put a cell phone up your ass?
[02:11:16]  I mean, how long did that take?
[02:11:18]  Do you have to work your way up to a cell phone?
[02:11:20]  I mean, yeah, it's like, yeah, you practice with it with a bar of soap, you know.
[02:11:25]  And I'm like, wow, that's incredible, bar of soap, yeah.
[02:11:29]  So you got to practice it until you're kind of comfortable with a bar of soap, and then you, you know, you work your way up to a cell phone.
[02:11:35]  I said, well, well, you know, I mean, I'm glad I don't feel good right now at all.
[02:11:38]  Like, I, my stomach's upset right now, just thinking.
[02:11:41]  Well, I mean, I remember I wrote, I posted on Facebook and I said, uh, I guess these guys travel light, you know, because they were talking about back in those times, they were talking about they were charging for a carry on and stuff like that.
[02:11:53]  And I said, Man, you just pay a Puerto Rican and he'll take your luggage up his ass.
[02:11:56]  Yeah, yeah, travel light, you know.
[02:11:59]  That's brilliant.
[02:11:59]  Yeah.
[02:12:00]  So, yeah, the charger, the phone, I mean, it was just one story after another.
[02:12:04]  And you just got demonetized.

=== Finding Silver Linings (02:01) ===

[02:12:05]  Yeah, yeah, right.
[02:12:07]  Well, can I mention the brand of the phone so you can get maybe some endorsement?
[02:12:10]  Yeah, yeah.
[02:12:12]  Well, that's a great way to end it, man.
[02:12:14]  I appreciate you coming on here.
[02:12:15]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[02:12:16]  That's a good one.
[02:12:17]  I appreciate you telling your story, man.
[02:12:19]  No, man.
[02:12:20]  It's fascinating.
[02:12:20]  You're a really good storyteller.
[02:12:22]  Anytime you want to have me back, I think.
[02:12:25]  Am I your first Hispanic guest?
[02:12:27]  No, you're not, actually.
[02:12:29]  Bustamante.
[02:12:30]  No, we've had a few.
[02:12:31]  Oh, listen, bro.
[02:12:33]  I had a buddy who's ex CIA.
[02:12:36]  Ex CIA.
[02:12:37]  He came on.
[02:12:38]  Super cool guy.
[02:12:39]  He's done a couple podcasts.
[02:12:42]  He's been on here a bunch.
[02:12:43]  Love Andrew.
[02:12:44]  He's super smart guy.
[02:12:45]  Smart guy.
[02:12:46]  Nice guy.
[02:12:47]  Cool guy.
[02:12:47]  Man, he's got some stories.
[02:12:49]  Some of them he can tell.
[02:12:49]  Some of them he can't.
[02:12:50]  He's like, well, I can't really talk about that.
[02:12:53]  This.
[02:12:53]  Yeah.
[02:12:54]  No, this was great.
[02:12:55]  I'd love to have you on again.
[02:12:56]  Absolutely.
[02:12:57]  Has Matt written your book yet?
[02:12:59]  You know, the whole time I was trying to write it.
[02:13:02]  And, you know, he kept saying this is what a bunch of these jerk offs say No, no, I'm going to do it myself.
[02:13:07]  I'm going to do it myself.
[02:13:08]  Stop it.
[02:13:08]  You're not going to do it yourself.
[02:13:10]  Let's start the.
[02:13:11]  No, no.
[02:13:12]  When I come back.
[02:13:13]  And when I.
[02:13:14]  It never happened.
[02:13:15]  No, never did it.
[02:13:16]  Never did an outline.
[02:13:17]  Always was going to.
[02:13:19]  Even said this a few times, which kills me.
[02:13:22]  When I get out, stop.
[02:13:24]  Yeah.
[02:13:25]  You'll never have this much time in your life.
[02:13:27]  When you get out, you're going to do it.
[02:13:28]  Right, right, right, right.
[02:13:29]  Stop it.
[02:13:30]  Well, the silver lining to all this, it's an uphill battle when you get out, and you got to walk through a minefield to stay free and.
[02:13:37]  There's a lot of hoops you got to jump through.
[02:13:38]  But the silver lining in all of this is that true crime is the most profitable endeavor right now.
[02:13:45]  Legal so far.
[02:13:46]  You need to write your story because there's a lot more to a story.
[02:13:49]  But what's great is how delicious liquid death was.
[02:13:54]  Murder your thirst.
[02:13:55]  And if you are, yeah, solid death is a whole different story.
[02:13:59]  Liquid death is the way to go.
[02:14:02]  Cool, man.
[02:14:02]  Well, thanks again.
[02:14:03]  No problem, man.
[02:14:04]  Goodbye, world.
[02:14:05]  All right.
[02:14:06]  Hasta mañana.