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Dec. 24, 2015 - Sargon of Akkad - Carl Benjamin
08:14
Christmas is Problematic
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Time Text
Merry Christmas!
It's 2015!
That's not inclusive!
That's not PC!
This needs to be changed.
Immediately.
That's more like it.
Now I think it's time to go on the internet and check my privilege by doing a bit of holiday activism.
The equality movement needs your Christmas love.
Well, they use the word Christmas and not holidays, but okay.
So who is on your gift-giving list this year?
Mum, dad, girlfriend, boyfriend, best friend?
Ugh, that's so heteronormative.
Obviously, it doesn't say my polyamorous, asexual, demi-queer, gender-fluid life partner.
Do you know when the last time you gave to an LGBT non-profit was?
Well, of course I do.
I give to all the non-profits.
There isn't a Patreon in existence that I don't donate to.
For the first time since the Great Recession of 2007 and 2008, leading LGBT non-profits saw a decrease in revenue, while other leading non-profits saw their revenue continue to increase.
This is particularly alarming, since the expenditures for the 10 largest anti-LGBT organisations are greater than twice the expenses of the top 10 LGBT groups.
There is no doubt in my mind that this is the work of the patriarchy.
If only everyone knew how problematic everything about Christmas was, this wouldn't be happening.
Well, it looks like the shitlords aren't going to educate themselves.
Someone's going to have to do it for them.
Typical white male entitlement.
First things first, it is not okay to tell someone to get into the Christmas spirit.
Trigger warning, abuse, hate crimes, eating disorders.
Note, in the context of North America, the worst America, not everyone celebrates Christmas.
Many people of different cultures and religions have different winter celebrations or don't celebrate anything at all.
Not only is it important to respect other people and their cultures, but telling people to partake in Christian holidays is extremely problematic, as historically and currently in North America, many people are forced to assimilate into Christian culture, or to convert to Christianity.
Remember, Christmas is a holiday included in Christian privilege.
Not only is it more highly publicized than any other winter holiday, but it's also seen as better by society.
People who are non-white and non-Christian experience more hate crimes than people who are.
Thus, Christmas can cause distress in many non-white, non-Christians as it reminds them that their race, culture and religion are not accepted by society, and they are likely to be verbally and physically assaulted for not being a part of white Christian society.
Not that they're more likely than Christians to be assaulted, it's just that them being assaulted is, frankly, likely.
Like 75 or 80% likely.
Something like that.
Google it.
And then if the Google results are different to what I'm telling you, remember that Google is part of the patriarchy.
Christmas can be mentally demanding on some people.
Not only can the chaos and rush of Christmas cause anxiety and depression, but Christmas can be triggering for many people.
Some people may have had bad things happen to them around the holidays, or someone may have used the holidays as an excuse to abuse them.
For these people, Christmas may remind them of this abuse, and thus cause fresh panic attacks, hallucinations, insomnia, vomiting, and any other stress or post-traumatic stress-related symptoms.
Many people feel forced by society to get into the Christmas spirit by spending the holidays with their family.
If their family is abusive, this can cause them a lot of distress.
And don't forget that some people do not have families.
This may cause them to feel depressed during holidays and thus choose not to celebrate them.
Therefore, nobody should celebrate them.
You don't want to go triggering some poor orphan that was abused by his now dead family, do you?
Do you?
The thing is, people being molested by their dead parents is just the start of what's wrong with the holiday season.
Obviously, Christmas movies are problematic.
Even to Rick Grimes and he has to deal with walkers on a daily basis.
Basically, you have to stop watching Christmas holiday specials.
And that literally includes all of them.
But especially, White Christmas from 1954.
Now, obviously, it's called White Christmas, so it's racist.
But it's also double racist, because look at this!
Two guys in Blackface in the background.
Blackface.
In 2015.
Unbelievable.
That's it.
I'm going to have to make the rest of this video a safe space.
It's not just Christmas movies that are problematic.
Christmas songs are problematic as well.
Every single one of them is part of rape culture.
I saw Mummy kissing Santa Claus.
Clearly, Mummy was actually being raped by a member of the patriarchy.
It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.
Clearly this is about the objectification of women and is probably used in the defense of rapists by asking what exactly was she wearing.
Santa Baby is clearly about a woman who has internalised her own oppression and wants to be colonised by a white supremacist capitalist patriarch.
And worst of all, Baby It's Cold Outside.
A song where a man literally rapes a woman by persuading her to have sex with him.
And you know what?
Don't bother buying any presents either, because you'll just expect her to have to wrap them.
Because you hate women and think that they should be responsible for providing the holiday joy.
And purchasing presents oppresses third world children who make those presents and supports the capitalist patriarchy.
You shitlord.
But listen, bruh, over the holidays, you're going to have to spend some time with people who don't share your views.
Especially at mealtimes where you literally can't get away from them, because you're all sat around the same table.
So you're going to have to use these social justice holiday placemats in order to help yourself counteract the common sense and logic they're going to use against you.
Make sure you memorise the tips for talking to families.
Remember to listen mindfully before formulating a thoughtful response.
Breathe.
Ask questions when people express strong opinions.
Affirm, clarify the difference between the good intentions and the impact.
Speak from a place of mutual interest, sharing personal experiences and emotions.
Because it might not be clear that you are in fact an android, adopted by a human family and unable to share your own feelings without being instructed to by Harvard University.
And it doesn't matter if Harvard apologises for this holiday placemat.
That's just the patriarchy pushing back against social justice.
Stay firm, stay resolute, and march in solidarity with your gender-neutral activist siblings.
Now remember, because it's the holiday season, there will undoubtedly be holiday parties.
But what you'll want to do is follow the University of Tennessee's guideline and not make your holiday party a Christmas party in disguise.
Because that'd be pretty goddamn problematic.
You know what sort of thing happens at Christmas parties?
Secret Santa.
And that means sexism.
You know what?
Our culture can't be trusted with this holiday season.
Around this time of year, it would be better for us to look to other cultures to see what they do.
Black Pete?
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