Sargon of Akkad - Carl Benjamin - The Protein World Saga
Aired: 2015-04-29
Duration: 11:23


=== Why Protein World Ads Fail (08:10) ===

[00:00:00]  Gather round ladies and gentlemen because I'd like to tell you about Protein World and the saga of their advertising campaign Are You Beach Body Ready?
[00:00:10]  Now I don't know about you, but I'm not very fit and I'm not really interested in being all that fit.
[00:00:16]  Seems like a lot of work.
[00:00:18]  And so when I see these kind of fitness adverts placed around, I look at them and think, yeah, that's too much work for me.
[00:00:26]  And so naturally, I just forget all about it and carry on with my day.
[00:00:31]  What I don't do is take to Twitter to bitch and moan about it.
[00:00:35]  Unlike Hannah Atkinson, a no-account feminist who saw this advert on the London Underground and just couldn't resist.
[00:00:44]  She tweeted, this advert pretty much sums up everything that I despise about how we treat and value women's bodies.
[00:00:53]  Hannah appears to be bitching about good looks and hard work and effort paying off for other people.
[00:01:00]  But because she's a feminist, wouldn't you know it, BuzzFeed decided to feature her tweet on their shitty ass site.
[00:01:08]  Sounds like it's time to start a controversy, doesn't it?
[00:01:11]  Feminists across the Twitterverse were of course shocked, shocked that this was happening.
[00:01:16]  How could an attractive woman be put on a poster?
[00:01:19]  So naturally they went to deface them.
[00:01:22]  This generally involved feminists walking up to the adverts, writing something or scribbling something on them, and then bravely tweeting about it.
[00:01:30]  And a couple of them even decided to use their own bodies to deface this poster.
[00:01:34]  And the one on the left looks like she's come straight out of the fucking 50s, doesn't she?
[00:01:38]  And the feminists really went crazy with this.
[00:01:40]  They seem to take it on like it's some sort of community activity, like this needed to be done to advance the cause of feminism.
[00:01:49]  I absolutely adore this.
[00:01:51]  This insane ad, insane, from Protein World revealed my previously untapped urge to vandalize.
[00:01:58]  Good for you.
[00:01:59]  I particularly like this one.
[00:02:00]  The Vagenda team say, we love London.
[00:02:04]  Fuck patriarchy.
[00:02:06]  This, again, is just more proof than I can use to show that the word patriarchy is interchangeable with the word standards.
[00:02:14]  You see, feminists love mobs.
[00:02:16]  They love forming mobs.
[00:02:18]  Because without mobs, they seem crazy.
[00:02:20]  And so when one of them finds something that they can all get offended by, because all of these feminists are kind of pudgy, the backlash begins.
[00:02:29]  The backlash, of course, largely took place on Twitter with thousands of feminists taking to a change.org petition.
[00:02:37]  Remove the are you beach body ready advertisements?
[00:02:41]  Almost 60,000 fat lazy feminists were like, yeah, yeah, I'll tweet my support for that.
[00:02:47]  The justification for this was, of course, retarded.
[00:02:51]  Protein World is directly targeting individuals, aiming to make them feel physically inferior to the unrealistic body image of the bronze model in order to sell their product.
[00:03:03]  Now this is true.
[00:03:04]  I mean, if you are in fact a land whale who sits on her ass and uses Twitter all day, then this will be an unrealistic body image.
[00:03:12]  You will never achieve it.
[00:03:13]  The bit I found most amusing though is the idea that Protein World were directly targeting individuals.
[00:03:18]  Well did did it have your fucking name on it or something?
[00:03:21]  Or is this a case that you are a giant fucking narcissist and you think you are the center of the fucking universe?
[00:03:29]  Perhaps not everyone's priority is having a beach body.
[00:03:34]  By the way, what is that?
[00:03:36]  A toned attractive body they showed you in the picture, you fucking idiots.
[00:03:40]  And by making someone feel guilty for not prioritizing it by questioning their personal choices is a step too far.
[00:03:47]  They didn't make you do shit.
[00:03:49]  This is so fucking subjective, it's retarded.
[00:03:52]  Listen, dipshit, they don't know who you are.
[00:03:56]  They didn't know you were going to see their adverts.
[00:03:58]  Feel bad about yourself for being fat and lazy, and then take up to change.org to write a petition about it.
[00:04:06]  But you know what, this campaign was a complete, resounding success.
[00:04:09]  It's been announced that they're taking down the ads, but haven't given a precise reason.
[00:04:14]  Doesn't matter though, I'm sure that it's been influenced by all your contributions to this cause.
[00:04:19]  This is a cause now.
[00:04:21]  And I'm glad to have been part of this.
[00:04:23]  Naturally, The Guardian got well on board.
[00:04:26]  Beach body ready tube ads to be taken down ahead of mass protest.
[00:04:31]  This protest is called Taking Back the Beach, and it's due to happen on May the 2nd.
[00:04:37]  They want people to turn up at Hyde Park in their bikinis and swim shorts and whatnot.
[00:04:43]  Which I'm sure won't be the most disgusting thing you've ever fucking seen.
[00:04:48]  And apparently, this was never about suggesting that people shouldn't try to get fit if they want to.
[00:04:53]  If having rippling abs is your thing, more power to you.
[00:04:57]  I bet you rock them.
[00:04:58]  But I'm so tired of it being an expectation.
[00:05:02]  What are you fucking talking about?
[00:05:04]  If it was an expectation, then there would be no need for the advert.
[00:05:09]  The idea that your body should be covered up and hidden away if it doesn't meet these bizarrely specific requirements.
[00:05:16]  I'm over it, you guys.
[00:05:17]  I think you're projecting all over it is what you're doing.
[00:05:20]  This isn't about the advert, this is about you.
[00:05:23]  But you know what, my dear feminists?
[00:05:25]  You shouldn't count your calories before you've eaten them.
[00:05:28]  Because you might find yourself eating an apple rather than a Mars bar.
[00:05:32]  Because it turns out that these posters were being removed from the underground as they are at the end of their advertising cycle in quotes as if that is a made-up excuse.
[00:05:44]  But on top of that, they had only actually received one complaint about the advert.
[00:05:50]  All of this noise on Twitter by angry, indignant, self-righteous feminists.
[00:05:56]  One complaint.
[00:05:58]  But they do have a zero tolerance policy towards graffiti and take action to prevent and remove it.
[00:06:04]  I wonder if that involves prosecuting any of the fuckwits who put their pictures on Twitter saying, hey, I did this.
[00:06:12]  Probably not, to be honest, because feminists are so pathetically childlike that everyone looks at them and goes, oh, do we have to deal with them?
[00:06:20]  Let's just let them go.
[00:06:21]  They're pointless.
[00:06:22]  They can't effect any kind of change.
[00:06:26]  Except for body shaming more attractive women, which is almost every woman, really.
[00:06:31]  The model said, I think nearly every ad campaign you have ever seen is open to interpretation.
[00:06:37]  But saying the ad is body shaming by body shaming the image is very contradictory.
[00:06:42]  Two wrongs don't make a right.
[00:06:44]  Well, that's true, but I have to warn you, feminists are not in any way concerned with being in the right.
[00:06:52]  What they're concerned with is projecting their own fears and insecurities onto this attractive young woman.
[00:06:58]  And we can see this in the example of Miranda Faye.
[00:07:00]  Stop encouraging women to starve themselves.
[00:07:03]  How dare you?
[00:07:04]  How very dare you?
[00:07:05]  Well, it turns out that the model behind this is a strict vegan.
[00:07:08]  She says, I'm a real person behind the image.
[00:07:10]  I work very hard and live a healthy and active lifestyle, which is why Protein World chose me for their campaign.
[00:07:16]  I couldn't work every day as a full-time model by starving myself, dieting or not looking after my body.
[00:07:22]  Nourish your body, be kind to it, and it will love you right back, no matter your size.
[00:07:26]  What the fuck is this shit?
[00:07:28]  Eat healthily, do exercise, feel good about yourself.
[00:07:33]  That sounds like the fucking patriarchy, doesn't it?
[00:07:36]  This model seems to be a real success story, in fact.
[00:07:39]  She works out four to five times a week, including beach running and Pilates with weights, and she's always been a bit on the skinny side.
[00:07:46]  But yeah, that's right, feminists.
[00:07:49]  You shame her into saying that she starves herself.
[00:07:52]  She finishes the interview by saying, I work hard to keep my body looking healthy and fit, which means eating six times a day, which is strange for someone who's starving themselves, isn't it?

=== Feminists as Terrorists? (03:27) ===

[00:08:01]  And working out with resistance and weight to make sure I maintain lean muscle.
[00:08:05]  Yeah, to be honest with you, you've lost them already.
[00:08:08]  Trust me, the feminists are not following at this point.
[00:08:10]  All they're hearing is fat shaming.
[00:08:13]  Because they're fat.
[00:08:14]  This even rallied other celebrities to come out against feminism.
[00:08:18]  Louisa Zisman slams bra-burning feminists against Protein World Bikini Body Adverts after she's announced as their ambassador.
[00:08:26]  Her opinion is that the controversy surrounding Protein World is the extreme feminist brigade letting off some bra-burning steam once again.
[00:08:34]  How very right you are.
[00:08:36]  The most accurate bit about this is characterizing them as extremists, because they absolutely are.
[00:08:43]  You're reading that correctly.
[00:08:46]  Protein World actually received bomb threats from feminists.
[00:08:50]  Richard Staverley, the head of global marketing for Protein World, told ITV's Good Morning Britain that there had been violent and physical threats on the company's head office.
[00:09:00]  He said, we've had a bomb threat that's been reported to the police and is currently being investigated, but I can't say any more than that.
[00:09:08]  Holy fucking shit.
[00:09:10]  Unsurprisingly, this led Protein World to label these feminist campaigners as terrorists.
[00:09:16]  Probably because they're acting like terrorists.
[00:09:19]  What would be the point of calling it a bomb threat if not to spread terror?
[00:09:24]  Which, of course, makes feminism look more and more like Islamism.
[00:09:28]  This isn't even a joke either.
[00:09:30]  I mean, it's not the fact that they've got unquestionable dogma.
[00:09:33]  It's not the fact that they're sending bomb threats and terrorizing people in order to get their way.
[00:09:38]  In this instance, it's that feminists have done exactly what Muslims have done.
[00:09:44]  Seriously, what the fuck modern feminism?
[00:09:48]  What do you want them to wear fucking burkhas or something?
[00:09:51]  Jesus fucking Christ.
[00:09:54]  Would you just stop for five minutes and take a fucking look at yourselves?
[00:10:00]  Of course, commentators on the internet found this wildly hilarious, and feminists just look like a raving pack of lunatics, projecting their own insecurities over everything, on everything, regardless of common sense or decency.
[00:10:14]  But do you know who the real winners here were?
[00:10:16]  The real winners were Protein World.
[00:10:19]  By a fucking landslide.
[00:10:22]  So far, their £250,000 media campaign has reaped a million pounds in direct sales revenue.
[00:10:31]  Protein World have made out like fucking bandits because of feminist outrage.
[00:10:36]  And the very best part of this is that they've done it with the most rare form of Ilan I have ever seen.
[00:10:43]  They simply do not give a fuck.
[00:10:47]  Seriously, if you want a good laugh, go to the Protein World Twitter feed and watch them rip the piss out of feminists.
[00:10:56]  Because like all things with modern day radical feminism and pretty much all feminism is radical these days, they don't realize how deeply, deeply unpopular they are.
[00:11:09]  Nobody is on their side.
[00:11:11]  Just their little fucking echo chamber.
[00:11:14]  That's it.
[00:11:16]  And as we can clearly see, pandering to feminists and social justice warriors gets you nothing.