Speaker | Time | Text |
---|---|---|
And it's just gonna go to me? | ||
unidentified
|
Yep. | |
Yep. | ||
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to our live... | ||
Broadcast tonight, we are going to be live roasting the State of the Union with Joe Biden. | ||
The Supreme Court justices have just walked down the stairs into the House chamber and Nancy Pelosi is standing right there. | ||
We are going to be live today. | ||
We're going to have your comments up on screen. | ||
Dear Sam is up in the studio right now. | ||
You can see the comments rolling in. | ||
Okay. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, we're good. | ||
All right. | ||
We're going to be working. | ||
You can see the comments on screen. | ||
I can see the comments on screen. | ||
So we're going to be working here with the comments. | ||
We're going to be listening live to Joe Brandon. | ||
I can see Kamala Harris and Pelosi up at the dais. | ||
Sam, is there any way to swap out the video behind us? | ||
I know it'll look a little messy. | ||
Can we take the C-SPAN feed? | ||
I have it. | ||
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
Yeah, there you go. | ||
Just the same. | ||
YouTube link, right? | ||
unidentified
|
I mean, it's going to look messy here. | |
Okay, well. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen. | ||
All right, I'm seeing a lot of Let's Go Brandon. | ||
I got my Crymore Lib shirt on. | ||
We're going to be swapping out our feed so you guys can see sort of the behind the stage here for Joe Biden. | ||
This is how we do. | ||
It's in the studio build, Sam. | ||
And, of course, ladies and gentlemen, I got myself a beer here. | ||
There we go. | ||
unidentified
|
Madam Speaker, the President's Cabinet. | |
Oh, that's fabulous. | ||
Oh, we're in the Matrix now, Sam! | ||
Good job. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, I am watching. | ||
No, I'm going to have to see you here. | ||
unidentified
|
Here we go. | |
I pray God. | ||
unidentified
|
What a trip to you. | |
The sundavers are great. | ||
Oh, yes. | ||
Yes, yes, yes. | ||
We are attempting to bring you a shot. | ||
The doctor. | ||
The doctor. | ||
Why is there anyone in the lab spoken to? | ||
The doctor. | ||
Traffic. | ||
You represent Mrs. Atman, a national geographic. | ||
She was drama, money and fame, shop music. | ||
We've seen a lot of things on The Real House Unpredictable Rich Woman. | ||
Sign me up. | ||
It's an extraordinary story. | ||
unidentified
|
A computer salesman was supposed to report to prison to begin a 17-year sentence. | |
They let him turn himself into jail with no escort. | ||
How do you do that? | ||
unidentified
|
There we go! | |
Who else is drinking at the State of the Union? | ||
Can you help catch this fugitive? | ||
Have you seen this man? | ||
Have you seen this man? | ||
Listen and join the all-new hunt wherever you get your podcasts. | ||
ABC News, America's number one source. | ||
Good evening, President Biden. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, all right. | ||
Well, here we go. | ||
Oh, okay. | ||
We got the Stand with Ukraine stuff going now. | ||
All right. | ||
So that's the swag. | ||
Sheila Jackson Lee there from Texas. | ||
Oh, there's Mayorkas! | ||
A little bald man. | ||
Creepy little bald man. | ||
Secretary Mayorkas. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen. | ||
And, uh, oh, yikes. | ||
Anthony Blinken. | ||
Alright, here we go. | ||
Let's read some comments. | ||
I hope he has a fresh diaper on. | ||
Yes? | ||
True? | ||
Benny's live tonight? | ||
Haha, yeah, that's right. | ||
And everyone thanks Studio Sam, who got us the right live feed so that we can watch everyone coming in. | ||
Here we go, Benny and the Jets. | ||
Sam said it looked like the Matrix. | ||
It did look like the Matrix. | ||
Maybe that's what it was, Sam. | ||
Maybe they needed the Matrix in order to bring Joe Biden to life. | ||
Maybe Joe Biden's gonna be like Tupac at Coachella. | ||
He's gonna be a hologram. | ||
You never know. | ||
Too bad Trump ain't there. | ||
True. | ||
unidentified
|
Is he going to be able to stay up this late? | |
How is he going to be able to stay up this late? | ||
That's right. | ||
I love being able to see the comments on the screen. | ||
Can you see the comments on the screen? | ||
You can see them, can't you? | ||
Alright, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
unidentified
|
Here we go. | |
Corn pop! | ||
Corn pop coming in! | ||
Again. | ||
We got our beer. | ||
I got a beer. | ||
I got a whole case. | ||
unidentified
|
I shouldn't do this. | |
I got a whole case of Coors Light. | ||
We're going to be doing a Coors Light. | ||
We're having Coors Light roast of Biden. | ||
That's what we're doing on this show. | ||
If you got them, put them up. | ||
It's Tuesday. | ||
Here we go. | ||
Benny, you are so funny. | ||
Thank you. | ||
Clowns. | ||
Yes, true. | ||
Me too. | ||
Although I got myself my Cry More Libs shirt on. | ||
We are ready to go. | ||
Ready to go. | ||
All right. | ||
All socials up and good, they say in the live chat. | ||
Thank you, everyone. | ||
Oh, Ted Cruz, the lion. | ||
Lion, Ted. | ||
With his mane, with his beard. | ||
He's trimmed his beard. | ||
Very sad. | ||
Kavanaugh's got a mullet going on there. | ||
He's got a little bit of helmet hair. | ||
Weird. | ||
Kavanaugh needs to, I don't know, use some lip balm. | ||
John Roberts, greatest trader to our country there ever was. | ||
Remember John Roberts, the beautiful selection of George W. Bush, to be a conservative justice. | ||
Yeah, right. | ||
That means, like, side with liberals at all times and every chance that he gets. | ||
Here we go. | ||
More comments. | ||
Rhino, you, Benny. | ||
I didn't see what the you was. | ||
Love you, Benny. | ||
Thank you very much. | ||
Time to lock them all up. | ||
It's a Let's Go Brandon party! | ||
It's a Let's Go Brandon party. | ||
Sometimes I like to drink right now. | ||
This is gold. | ||
Yeah, let's go. | ||
I can't watch this sober. | ||
That's right. | ||
Is that Marjorie Taylor Greene? | ||
Come on. | ||
Is that Marjorie Taylor Greene? | ||
Is that Marjorie? | ||
Turn around! | ||
Let's see. | ||
We are... | ||
Oh, there's Kat from Florida. | ||
Congresswoman Kat. | ||
Here we go. | ||
Let's read some comments. | ||
Show Biden the State of the Union. | ||
Clown show as Biden the State of the Union. | ||
Benny, you're awesome. | ||
Thank you. | ||
I'm going to turn it off. | ||
I'm starting to get a stomachache. | ||
So we have comments coming in from Facebook and YouTube and Rumble. | ||
Let the shit show begin. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm just reading the comments. | ||
Make a toast! | ||
All right, here we go. | ||
My... | ||
My toast. | ||
Here's to whispering angels who are helping Joe Biden get into the House, get into the House chamber right now. | ||
Thank you, whispering angels. | ||
Whispering angels. | ||
Angels, whisper to Joe Biden, please, wear your depend. | ||
Metamucil, come on, baby. | ||
Let's go. | ||
A lot of Ukraine pins I'm seeing. | ||
unidentified
|
Yeah, yeah, okay, all right. | |
Wear the pin! | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, we're going to have a great time. | ||
If you want to have a community, the purpose of all this tonight is we're putting a community. | ||
You can see your comments live on screen. | ||
They're coming in faster than I can even read them. | ||
You can see your comments on screen. | ||
You're going to be able to comment with us. | ||
You're going to be able to chat. | ||
You'll be able to see your chat literally inside of the live. | ||
unidentified
|
Okay? | |
Right down here. | ||
unidentified
|
There we go. | |
Boom. | ||
There's your chats. | ||
So you can talk with us. | ||
We'll talk back with you. | ||
You'll be able to hear us, you know, talk smack. | ||
So if you want a second screen experience, this is what you want to watch. | ||
Because I know you're going to be watching this like I watch these things and being like, what the hell is going on? | ||
Raging at the screen. | ||
Come on, ladies and gentlemen, do it with us. | ||
That's what you want to do. | ||
You want to be with your boy, Benny. | ||
Talking, and then Joe Biden will be on, and you'll be able to hear him talk. | ||
Speaking of hearing, Sam, can I get audio up in my IFB? | ||
Yes, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
unidentified
|
Got the IFB getting sophisticated. | |
Uh-oh. | ||
Is this it? | ||
Thank you, Sam. | ||
There he is. | ||
Here we go. | ||
Drink! | ||
Everyone drink! | ||
Everyone drink! | ||
unidentified
|
Can we please play the Let's Go Brandon theme song? | |
Come on, guys. | ||
Let's go, come on. | ||
Let's do the Let's Go Brandon thing. | ||
unidentified
|
Oh, man. | |
He's going to call Putin by name, saying that he underestimated NATO. | ||
He's going to rally these allies around sanctions again. | ||
And willing to lay out this theme of democracy versus autocracy. | ||
He's got to do this delicate dance, though, of winning that war in Europe. | ||
They can get related to where he's going. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Do what we say. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
You know what they say. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
You know what they say. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Hey, you know what they say. | ||
Yeah. | ||
You know what they say. | ||
Come on. | ||
Come on. | ||
All right. | ||
Right. | ||
Smiling, and one thing very disinterested here, the president shaking many hands on his way down that aisle. | ||
Here we go. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Did you hear that? | ||
I played my Let's Go Brandon song. | ||
You can see your comments on screen. | ||
unidentified
|
Salty, salty, salt. | |
Where's his mask? | ||
That's right. | ||
unidentified
|
Oh, there you go. | |
Nancy Pelosi. | ||
Don't rip it yet! | ||
Don't rip it up! | ||
unidentified
|
Don't do it! | |
Please! | ||
Members of Congress, I have the high privilege I have the high privilege and distinct honor of presenting to you the President of the United States. | ||
Thank you. | ||
We'll do a lot. | ||
Classic. | ||
A classic. | ||
Oh, look at the voice of it. | ||
Thank you. | ||
Thank you, thank you, thank you. | ||
Thank you, thank you, thank you. | ||
What are we clapping for? | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you all very much. | |
What are you clapping for? | ||
Thank you all very much. | ||
Clown world. | ||
Clown. | ||
unidentified
|
Clown world. | |
Thank you. | ||
Rip it up, Pelosi. | ||
unidentified
|
Rip it up. | |
Everyone in the comments saying, rip it up! | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you all very, very much. | |
Thank you. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you all very, very much. | |
Thank you so much. | ||
Turn the cameras around. | ||
Please. | ||
Let me see which Republicans are clapping. | ||
Madam Speaker, thank you so much. | ||
Madam Vice President and our First Lady and Second Gentleman. | ||
Madam Speaker, Madam Vice President and our First Lady and Second Gentleman. | ||
Members of Congress and the Cabinet, last year, COVID-19 kept us apart. | ||
This year, COVID-19 kept us apart. | ||
This year, COVID-19 kept us apart. | ||
This year, we're finally together again. | ||
Tonight, tonight, we meet as Democrats, Republicans, and Independents. | ||
Tonight we meet as Democrats, Republicans, and independents. | ||
But most importantly, as Americans. | ||
With the duty to one another, to the American people, to the Constitution, to the American people, to the Constitution. | ||
unidentified
|
Good ol' Sam, ladies and gentlemen. | |
Trust me, he's the best. | ||
You wouldn't believe what this one-man show can do. | ||
Six... | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
All right. | ||
Well, well, well. | ||
What are Republicans being clapping? | ||
Six days ago, Russia's Vladimir Putin sought to shake the very foundations of the free world, thinking he could make it bend to his menace Oh wow, this fast on Putin, huh? | ||
You didn't even sanction him! | ||
First flub. | ||
or imagine he met the Ukrainian people. | ||
They needed something, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
To every Ukrainian, their fearlessness, their courage, their determination literally inspires the world. | ||
Groups of citizens blocking tanks with their bodies. | ||
Everyone from students to retirees to teachers turned soldiers defending their homeland. | ||
And in this struggle, President Zelensky said in his speech to the European Parliament, Light will win over darkness. | ||
The Ukrainian ambassador to the United States is here tonight sitting with the First Lady. | ||
Let each of us, if you're able to stand, stand and send an unmistakable signal to the world to Ukraine. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
Thank you, thank you, thank you. | ||
unidentified
|
I get it. | |
Why is our governing body If there was this much patriotism for America, it sure would be nice. | ||
You know, our country is being invaded also. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
Yes. | ||
We, the United States of America, stand with the Ukrainian people. | ||
unidentified
|
Throughout our history, we've learned this lesson. | |
When dictators... | ||
Do not pay a price for their aggression. | ||
They cause more chaos. | ||
They keep moving. | ||
And the cost, the threats to America and America to the world keeps rising. | ||
That's why the NATO alliance was created to secure peace and stability in Europe after World War II. | ||
The United States is a member along with 29 other nations. | ||
It matters. | ||
American diplomacy matters. | ||
American resolve matters. | ||
Putin's latest attack on Ukraine was premeditated and totally unprovoked. | ||
He rejected repeated efforts at diplomacy. | ||
He thought the West and NATO wouldn't respond. | ||
He thought he could divide us at home, in this chamber, in this nation. | ||
He thought he could divide us in Europe as well. | ||
But Putin was wrong. | ||
We are ready. | ||
We are united, and that's what we did. | ||
We stayed united. | ||
We prepared extensively and carefully. | ||
We spent months building coalitions of other freedom-loving nations in Europe and from America to the Asian and African continents to confront Putin. | ||
Like many of you, I spent countless hours unifying our European allies. | ||
We shared with the world in advance what we knew Putin was planning. | ||
And precisely how we would try to falsify and justify his aggression. | ||
Falsify? | ||
We countered Russia's lies with the truth. | ||
And now, now that he's acted, the free world is holding him accountable, along with 27 members of the European Union, including France, Germany, Italy, as well as countries like the United Kingdom, Canada, Japan, Korea, Australia, New Zealand, and many others, even Switzerland, are inflicting pain on Russia and supporting the people of Ukraine. | ||
Putin is now isolated from the world more than he has ever been. | ||
Together. | ||
unidentified
|
You gave Vladimir Putin no string to pipeline. | |
You shut down the sea from the pipeline, making us more dependent on Vladimir Putin. | ||
What the hell does this have to be with our state union? | ||
You have made our state union unsafe. | ||
Together, along with our allies, We're cutting off Russia's largest banks in the international financial system, preventing Russia's central bank from defending the Russell ruble, making Putin's $630 billion war fund worthless. | ||
We're choking Russia's access. | ||
We're choking Russia's access to technology that will sap its economic strength and weaken its military for years to come. | ||
I say to the Russian oligarchs and the corrupt leaders who built billions of dollars off this violent regime, no more. | ||
The United States... | ||
unidentified
|
I mean it. | |
The United States Department of Justice is assembling a dedicated task force to go after the crimes of the Russian oligarchs. | ||
We're joining with European allies to find and seize their yachts, their luxury apartments, their private jets. | ||
We're coming for you, ill-begotten gains. | ||
And tonight, I'm announcing that we will join our allies in closing off American airspace to all Russian flights, further isolating Russia, and adding additional squeeze on their economy. | ||
unidentified
|
What about our country? | |
Just a question. | ||
What about America? | ||
He has no idea what's coming. | ||
The ruble has already lost 30% of its value. | ||
The Russian stock market has lost 40% of its value. | ||
And trading remains suspended. | ||
The Russian economy is reeling, and Putin alone is the one to blame. | ||
Together with our allies, we're providing support to the Ukrainians in their fight for freedom. | ||
Military assistance. | ||
Economic assistance, humanitarian assistance. | ||
We're giving more than a billion dollars of direct assistance to Ukraine and will continue to aid Ukrainian people as they defend their country and help ease their suffering. | ||
Again, ladies and gentlemen, I'm totally for the easing of suffering for Ukraine, but can somebody let me know exactly what that has to do with our nation? | ||
This is the state of our union. | ||
Our forces are not going to Europe to fight Ukraine, but to defend our NATO allies in the event that Putin decides to keep moving west. | ||
For that purpose, we have mobilized American ground forces, air squadrons, ship deployments to protect NATO countries, including Poland, Romania, Latvia, Lithuania, and Estonia. | ||
And as I've made crystal clear... | ||
The United States and our allies will defend every inch of territory that is NATO territory with the full force of our collective power. | ||
unidentified
|
Every single inch. | |
And we're clear-eyed. | ||
Ukrainians are fighting back with pure courage. | ||
But the next few days, weeks, and months will be hard on them. | ||
Putin has unleashed violence and chaos. | ||
But while he may make gains on the battlefield, he'll pay a continuing high price over the long run. | ||
And a pound of Ukrainian people, proud, proud people, pound for pound, ready to fight with every inch of energy they have. | ||
They've known 30 years of independence, have repeatedly shown that they will not tolerate anyone who tries to take their country backwards. | ||
To all Americans. | ||
I'll be honest with you, as I always promised I would be. | ||
A Russian dictator invading a foreign country has cost around the world. | ||
And I'm taking robust action to make sure the pain of our sanctions is targeted at a Russian economy, and that we use every tool at our disposal to protect American businesses and consumers. | ||
I can announce the United States has worked with 30 other countries to release 60 million barrels of oil from reserves around the world. | ||
America will lead that effort. | ||
You killed the Eastern XL pipeline. | ||
You gave Russia a pipeline, you jackwad. | ||
We stand ready to do more if necessary. | ||
Unite it with our allies. | ||
These steps will help blunt gas prices here at home. | ||
But I know news about what's happening can seem alarming to all Americans. | ||
But I want you to know we're going to be okay. | ||
We're going to be okay. | ||
When the history of this era is written, Putin's war on Ukraine will have left Russia weaker and the rest of the world stronger. | ||
Here comes the whisper, folks. | ||
Yes, here comes the whispers. | ||
unidentified
|
I promise you. | |
We shouldn't have taken something so terrible for people around the world to see what's at stake. | ||
Now everyone sees it clearly. | ||
We see the unity among leaders of nations, a more unified Europe, a more unified West. | ||
We see unity among the people who are gathering in cities and large crowds around the world, even in Russia, to demonstrate their support for the people of Ukraine. | ||
In the battle between democracy and autocracies, We stand with you. | ||
Putin may circle Kyiv with tanks, but he'll never gain the hearts and souls of the Iranian people. | ||
He'll never extinguish their love of freedom, and he will never, never weaken the resolve of the free world. | ||
unidentified
|
Unbelievable. | |
Not a mask in sight. | ||
unidentified
|
Wow. | |
Struggling on the delivery. | ||
Joe Biden, at least four or five different flubs already. | ||
Two of the hardest years this nation has ever faced. | ||
The pandemic has been punishing. | ||
Oh, are we going to talk about America? | ||
Living paycheck to paycheck, struggling to keep up with the rising cost of food, gas, housing, and so much more. | ||
Oh, we're going to talk about America finally. | ||
That was good. | ||
My dad had to leave his home in Scranton, Pennsylvania to find work. | ||
So like many of you, I grew up in a family. | ||
When the price of food went up, it was felt throughout the family. | ||
It had an impact. | ||
That's when one of the first things I did as president was fight to pass the American Rescue Plan. | ||
Because people were hurting, we needed to act, and we did. | ||
A few pieces of legislation have done more at a critical moment in our history to lift us out of a crisis. | ||
It fueled our efforts to vaccinate the nation and combat COVID-19. | ||
It delivered immediate economic relief to tens of millions of Americans. | ||
It helped put food on the table. | ||
Remember those Why does he keep telling this story? | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
Just a little bit of breathing room. | ||
Unlike the $2 trillion tax cut passed in the previous administration that benefited the top 1% of Americans, the American Liar! | ||
The American Rescue Plan helped working people and left no one behind. | ||
Oh, what a clown show. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, this is going really bad. | ||
All right? | ||
I didn't know it would be such a clown show. | ||
This is going really bad. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
Oh, my gosh. | ||
Have you ever seen teeth that fake? | ||
Look at that. | ||
Look at that. | ||
We created jobs, lots of jobs. | ||
In fact, our economy created over 6.5 million new jobs just last year. | ||
More jobs in one year than ever before in the history of the United States of America. | ||
He didn't create a job if it's a job that got shut down and came back. | ||
Is he going to cry? | ||
Man, Mitch looks rough, dude. | ||
Oh my goodness. | ||
Mitch looks rough. | ||
lower wages, bigger deficits, and a widening gap between the top and everyone else in nearly a century. | ||
Vice President Harris and I ran for office. | ||
What trash. | ||
Joe Biden always hated Reagan because Reagan clowned him. | ||
Why? | ||
Because we know. | ||
Just a reminder, by the way, Joe Biden refused to help Ukrainians when they asked for military aid. | ||
Because we know when the middle class grows, the poor will weigh up and the wealthy do very well. | ||
America used to have the best roads, bridges, and airports on Earth. | ||
And now our infrastructure is ranked 13th in the world. | ||
We won't be able to compete for the jobs of the 21st century if we don't fix it. | ||
That's why it was so important to pass the bipartisan infrastructure. | ||
Is he trying to throw a mustache? | ||
unidentified
|
What is this luck? | |
The single biggest investment in history. | ||
It was a bipartisan effort, and I want to thank the members of both parties who worked to make it happen. | ||
We're done talking about infrastructure weeks. | ||
We're now talking about an infrastructure decade. | ||
And look, it's going to-- it's going to transform America. | ||
To put us on a path to win the economic competition of the 21st century that we face with the rest of the world, particularly China. | ||
I've told Xi Jinping it's never been a good bet to bet against the American people. | ||
We'll create good jobs for millions of Americans modernizing roads, airports, ports, waterways all across America. | ||
And we'll do it to withstand the devastating effects of climate change and promote environmental justice. | ||
We'll build a national network of 500,000 electric vehicle charging stations. | ||
You're killing the middle class. | ||
You're inflating our dollar. | ||
You're making our savings worthless. | ||
You're tanking our economy and everyone knows it. | ||
Dementia Joe. | ||
Look at all these people. | ||
Dead men walking because they're all retiring or resigning or going to get beat. | ||
31 retirements for Democrats this year alone. | ||
And that number is going to go up. | ||
31 retirements. | ||
and 1,500 bridges in disrepair. | ||
Look at Pelosi. | ||
unidentified
|
Folks! | |
Is Kamala literally trying to blend in with the background? | ||
What is this Kamala suit? | ||
She's wearing a suit that's the exact same color as the chair she's sitting in. | ||
We're going to do it by buying America. | ||
unidentified
|
Buy American products. | |
Support American jobs. | ||
The federal government spends about $600 billion a year to keep this country safe and secure. | ||
Why is he snatching the floor? | ||
He smiled. | ||
There's been a law on the books for almost a century to make sure taxpayers'dollars support American jobs and businesses. | ||
Okay, this is the creepiest State of the Union ever. | ||
Look at this. | ||
Look at Nancy Pelosi. | ||
She looks like a vampire. | ||
I've literally seen characters in the haunted mansion at Disney World that were more lifelike than Nancy Pelosi. | ||
unidentified
|
But folks, wow. | |
Wow, all these people clapping for taking more of our tax dollars. | ||
Way to go. | ||
I've got a drink. | ||
Let me give you one example. | ||
She is a vampire. | ||
That's right. | ||
Obama's third term right now. | ||
Reading some comments. | ||
Because nobody really cares what's happening with king and queen Botox on the screen right now. | ||
That's where Intel, the American company that helped build Silicon Valley, is going to build a $20 billion semiconductor mega site, up to eight state-of-the-art factories in one place. | ||
Den of thieves, that's right. | ||
I saw that comment. | ||
Den of thieves. | ||
These people are thieves. | ||
Incredible. | ||
This is the most sophisticated robbery in the entire world, what these people do to you every single day. | ||
Have you checked your price of gas recently? | ||
All this happy horse crap about how good America's doing in the economy. | ||
Have you checked your price of gas? | ||
What does it cost you to go to the grocery store and buy, like, your kid milk? | ||
What does it cost? | ||
There you go, Pat. | ||
unidentified
|
Stand up. | |
Every single person here is wearing a Ukraine pin, and not a single person here is talking about how to lower your energy costs, lower the inflation in this country. | ||
Pat came to see me, and he told me they're ready to increase their investment from $20 billion to $100 billion. | ||
We've been sold out. | ||
Ooh, got a shot of Joe's bald spot there for a second. | ||
Send it to my desk. | ||
I'll sign it. | ||
And we'll really take off in a big way. | ||
Oh, oil just hit $110 a barrel. | ||
Great job, Joe. | ||
Way to go, Brandon. | ||
The rebirth of pride that comes from stamping products made in America. | ||
The revitalization of American manufacturing. | ||
Companies are choosing to build new factories here, when just a few years ago they would have gone Drink. | ||
Joe Biden said the word flactory. | ||
What's on Pelosi's desk? | ||
Oh, my goodness. | ||
unidentified
|
Look at this. | |
Oh, man. | ||
unidentified
|
Oh, look at this. | |
That creepy smile. | ||
Oh, weird. | ||
369,000 manufacturing jobs created in America last year alone. | ||
unidentified
|
Jennifer Granholm. | |
Folks. | ||
Macaulay Culkin. | ||
Powered by people I've met like Jojo Burgess. | ||
unidentified
|
Oh, yeah. | |
Good job. | ||
That's Joe Biden's economic advisor that you showed there. | ||
Where are you, Jojo? | ||
There you go. | ||
Thanks, buddy. | ||
As Ohio Senator Sherrod Brown says... | ||
I like his Jesus piece. | ||
It's a nice big old chain. | ||
It's time to bury the label Rust Belt. | ||
It's time to see what used to be called Rust Belt become the home of significant... | ||
Resurgence of manufacturing. | ||
unidentified
|
And with all the bright spots in our economy... | |
That's how to say the Rush Belt become my belt. | ||
I can wear it. | ||
unidentified
|
Especially when I need it for my depends. | |
I need a belt. | ||
Right now! | ||
Hurry! | ||
Whispering Angels! | ||
Nancy, help! | ||
unidentified
|
It'd be nice to see the Rust Belt become a belt belt. | |
What if a Rust Belt, I could wear it. | ||
unidentified
|
We could make the Rust Belt a thing. | |
We could sell it to the Ukrainians. | ||
unidentified
|
They could use it to hold up the Russian advance with their Rust Belt. | |
Nancy, get on that! | ||
Sure. | ||
Look at cars last year. | ||
Look at cars. | ||
Oh, they're social distancing. | ||
Look at that. | ||
Look at Rosa DeLauro with her purple hair. | ||
Rosa DeLauro, Congresswoman from Connecticut. | ||
She's so weird. | ||
She's got purple hair. | ||
She's always been a freak. | ||
I think I have a better idea to fight inflation. | ||
Lower your costs, not your wages. | ||
unidentified
|
No Republicans clapping. | |
Good. | ||
Sit down. | ||
Oh, that's Joe Manchin. | ||
You get a pass. | ||
What is on Nancy's desk? | ||
What is that? | ||
What's in front of Nancy? | ||
Is that perfume? | ||
Is that a jewelry box? | ||
Nancy, what you got there? | ||
What you got? | ||
What kind of vampire embalming fluid is that? | ||
Is that Nancy's embalming fluid? | ||
You can tell us, Nancy. | ||
We get it. | ||
unidentified
|
The arc of the cockpit. | |
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. | ||
Come on, everyone, let me know in the comments what is in front of Nancy. | ||
What is that thing? | ||
What is it? | ||
What is that thing? | ||
Oh. | ||
Building a better America. | ||
So they must have given up Build Back Better. | ||
Ah, too bad. | ||
unidentified
|
My plan will ease long-term inflationary pressures. | |
Top business leaders, and I believe most Americans support the plan. | ||
Here's the plan. | ||
First, cut the cost of prescription drugs. | ||
unidentified
|
We pay more. | |
Have you ever seen two people struggle more with their dangers? | ||
Back-to-back. | ||
Nancy and Joe. | ||
Holy cannoli. | ||
I met a 13 year old boy, the handsome young man standing up there, Joshua Davis. | ||
Okay, it's not Macaulay Culkin. | ||
He and his dad both have type one diabetes. | ||
You made insulin more expensive! | ||
unidentified
|
Guys... | |
You gotta know this. | ||
Joe Biden rolled back. | ||
Rolled back Donald Trump's order to make insulin like 25 bucks. | ||
He rolled that back so that he could package it inside of extremist, left-wing, I think it was the Build Back Better bill, so he could get the Green New Deal by saying it's just to lower insulin prices. | ||
This is how evil these people are. | ||
These people are satanic. | ||
A lot of people, a lot of very interesting comments on what may be in Nancy Pelosi's special embalming fluid kit. | ||
Look at that. | ||
Is it Pete Buttigieg? | ||
Is that Pete Buttigieg? | ||
Very good. | ||
He's the Secretary of Transportation. | ||
Right there on your screen. | ||
Trump lowered the insulin. | ||
unidentified
|
Guys, this is such insanity. | |
Trump lowered the insulin prices. | ||
unidentified
|
Prescription jugs? | |
They already set the price for VA drugs. | ||
Look, the American Rescue Plan is helping millions of families with Affordable Care Act plans to save them $2,400 a year on their health premiums. | ||
Let's close the coverage gap. | ||
Prescription jugs! | ||
unidentified
|
Good job, Joe. | |
Did Hunter Biden write this speech? | ||
Let's cut energy costs for families. | ||
Look at Pelosi. | ||
Pelosi's like... | ||
Exactly. | ||
How far along are we in this speech? | ||
unidentified
|
I have a coffin to hang upside down inside of in my office. | |
Oh, there we go. | ||
There you go. | ||
Yawn. | ||
Come on, yawn. | ||
I know you want to yawn. | ||
Yawn! | ||
Oh, they put her up in the gallery. | ||
They put her up. | ||
She didn't get us on the floor. | ||
Look at Pelosi. | ||
Pelosi's so worried exactly how long this thing's going to go. | ||
It's been 40 minutes so far. | ||
If you live in a major city in America, you'd pay up to $14,000 a year for childcare per child. | ||
I was a single dad for five years, raising two kids. | ||
I had a lot of help, though. | ||
I had a mom, a dad, a brother, and a sister that really helped. | ||
But middle class and working folks shouldn't have to pay more than 7% of their income to care for the young children. | ||
My plan... | ||
My plan would cut the cost of child care in half for most families. | ||
unidentified
|
Spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend, spend. | |
Spend more of your money. | ||
Because they couldn't afford child care. | ||
I hate stories like this, like he was a truck driver, yeah. | ||
unidentified
|
This is work that I thought. | |
Yes, that's right. | ||
Under my plan, nobody... | ||
Let me say this again. | ||
There's horse piss in front of Nancy? | ||
What? | ||
Oh, yeah. | ||
Here we go. | ||
unidentified
|
Oh, here comes the Nancy Pelosi comment to Kamala. | |
I may be wrong, but my guess is if we took a secret ballot in this floor, that we'd all agree that the present tax system ain't fair. | ||
unidentified
|
It ain't fair. | |
Why don't you pay your fair share? | ||
How about the 10% for the big guy? | ||
How about that? | ||
What did you pay? | ||
How much taxes did you pay on that? | ||
How about your investments in China, Nancy? | ||
Chris Coons and Tom Carper and my distinguished congresswoman, we come. | ||
My distinguished congresswoman. | ||
There are more corporations incorporated in America than every other state in America combined. | ||
And I still won 36 years in a row. | ||
The point is, even they understand you should pay just a fair share. | ||
Come on, man. | ||
unidentified
|
Je faire cher. | |
I was in profit and paid zero in federal taxes. | ||
Now look. | ||
It's not fair. | ||
That's why I proposed the 15% minimum tax rate for corporations. | ||
unidentified
|
Ladies and gentlemen, I've got to break out the emergency reserves here. | |
I'm breaking out the emergency reserves for this live. | ||
This requires... | ||
This is worse than I thought. | ||
This is way worse than I thought. | ||
That's why I propose closing loopholes for the very wealthy who pay a lower tax rate than a teacher and a firefighter. | ||
So that's my plan, but we'll go in more detail later. | ||
I'm going to grow. | ||
We will grow the economy. | ||
Sharing is caring. | ||
Lower the cost of families. | ||
Cheers. | ||
So what are we waiting for? | ||
Republican beer. | ||
The Coors family. | ||
Republicans. | ||
Republican beers. | ||
Folks. | ||
Hear me. | ||
Hear you out. | ||
Tony Colon. | ||
Good Lord, the Joker, make it stop. | ||
...which plays a critical role in fighting inflation. | ||
My plan will not only lower costs and give families a fair shot, it will lower the deficit. | ||
The previous administration not only ballooned the deficit with those tax cuts for the very wealthy corporations, it undermined the watchdogs. | ||
The job of those pandemic relief funds being wasted. | ||
Remember we had those debates about whether or not those watchdogs should be able to see every day how much money was being spent, where was it going to the right place? | ||
This beer is for Nancy Pelosi's plastic surgeon. | ||
Dude, you have the toughest job in the world. | ||
The criminals who stole billions of relief money meant for small business in millions of Americans. | ||
This scumbag, this is the scumbag that says that you parents standing up at your school boards are domestic terrorists. | ||
This scumbag, this guy, this piece of trash, Merrick Garland, what an asshat this guy is. | ||
Impeach him. | ||
Impeach. | ||
The only president ever to cut the deficit by more than $1 trillion in a single year. | ||
Lowering your cost also meant demanding more competition. | ||
I'm a capitalist, but capitalism without competition is not capitalism. | ||
Capitalism without competition is exploitation. | ||
Listen to this jackass talk about capitalism like he's ever created a job. | ||
This guy has never created a single job. | ||
He's never made a single product on the open market. | ||
This guy's never done a single thing. | ||
He's only ever been a parasite stealing your money. | ||
Whoa. | ||
Why did they let a turtle in Congress? | ||
Everyone, a giant, endangered Galapagos tortoise has escaped. | ||
You play with them, but you don't get to play at all. | ||
And you pay a hell of a lot more. | ||
A hell of a lot more because there's only four. | ||
Someone get them back to the zoo. | ||
Oh, Nancy's chatting again. | ||
Chatting again. | ||
It's the hair salon. | ||
About half a dozen or less foreign-owned companies raised prices by as much as 1,000% and made record profits. | ||
Tonight, I'm announcing a crackdown on those companies overcharging American businesses and consumers. | ||
Folks. | ||
I need a vomit bag. | ||
That's right. | ||
Traitor. | ||
He's full of poop emoji. | ||
This is what evil looks like. | ||
B.S. I'm sick. | ||
I can't stand it. | ||
O.M.G. | ||
Nancy's smug, stupid face. | ||
Hey, she paid a lot of money for that face. | ||
No, Joe, your kindness. | ||
Oh, here's Senator Whitehouse, who runs an all-white country club. | ||
Did you know this? | ||
Look it up. | ||
And remember, Black Lives Matter. | ||
But Senator Whitehouse from Rhode Island is a member of an all-white country club. | ||
This is not a joke, by the way. | ||
He was just on screen with purple glasses. | ||
Let's pass the Paycheck Fairness Act and pay leave. | ||
Raise the minimum wage to $15 an hour. | ||
Well, the dollars are worth nothing anymore, so you can raise the minimum wage. | ||
You already raised the minimum wage because of inflation. | ||
Even Susan Collins, who's like... | ||
Susan Collins is essentially a liberal... | ||
She's essentially like a blue dog Democrat. | ||
She's just like... | ||
unidentified
|
What the hell is going on? | |
Jill. | ||
Why am I clapping? | ||
Loud noises! | ||
I love lamp! | ||
Jill over here. | ||
Popping Xanax. | ||
That doesn't even count. | ||
Close to a million people who sit at a dining room table or a kitchen table and look at an empty chair. | ||
Because they lost somebody. | ||
Oh, here comes the... | ||
But I also know this. | ||
Because of the progress we've made, because of your resilience... | ||
Yes, Elizabeth Warren thinking about her next $4 million book deal. | ||
Very troubling. | ||
I can say we're moving forward safely. | ||
Back to more normal routines. | ||
We've reached a new moment in the fight against COVID-19. | ||
A more normal routine. | ||
Where we all wear... | ||
Our rust belt. | ||
Every family needs a rust belt. | ||
The Center for Disease Control and Prevention issued a new mask guidelines. | ||
Under the new guidelines, most Americans and most of the country can now go mask-free. | ||
And based on projections... | ||
We're not going to forget, you sons of bitches! | ||
Ooh, Marjorie, there we go. | ||
Thanks to the progress we've made in the past year, COVID-19 no longer need control our lives. | ||
I know some are talking about living with COVID-19. | ||
But tonight, I say that we never will just accept living with COVID-19. | ||
We'll continue to combat the virus as we do other diseases. | ||
And because this virus mutates and spreads, we have to stay on guard. | ||
And here are four common-sense steps. | ||
unidentified
|
This is Xavier Becerra. | |
Joe Biden called him Xavier Baccaria when he was announcing his nomination. | ||
Clown. | ||
unidentified
|
Clown world. | |
Honk, honk. | ||
Honk, honk, honk. | ||
We'll never give up on vaccinating more Americans. | ||
Now I know parents with kids under five are eager to see their vaccines authorized for their children. | ||
are working on world that done will be ready with plenty of vaccines if and when they do we're all ready we are also ready with antiviral treatments if you get coven 19 the pfizer pill reduces your chances of ending up in the hospital by 90 percent I bet you have more pills than anyone in the world has. | ||
unidentified
|
I bet you have more pills than anyone in the world has. | |
million pills this month and more than double that next month. | ||
And now we're launching the test to treat initiative. | ||
So people can get tested at a pharmacy and if they prove positive, receive the antiviral pills on the spot at no cost. | ||
I'm just rewatching that clip. | ||
Steve Scalise is like cracking up. | ||
What is this with Jerry Nadler? | ||
Dude, Jerry Nadler. | ||
Man, holy smokes. | ||
Jerry Nadler looks rough, man. | ||
Dude, Jerry Nadler, you gotta retire, bro. | ||
What's in front of Pelosi? | ||
What is that? | ||
Is that some type of Harry Potter thing? | ||
Is she in Slytherin? | ||
Is that Pelosi's sorting hat? | ||
What's going on? | ||
Yeah, you're exactly right. | ||
Madison. | ||
Madison wants a Madison. | ||
My boy! | ||
It's my boy, Madison. | ||
What's he got? | ||
What's his hand in his pocket for? | ||
We've got to ask him that. | ||
Lauren Boebert coming on as soon as we're done. | ||
Lauren Boebert's going to be coming on our show. | ||
Stay tuned after this giant heap of... | ||
Dino poo. | ||
The only thing I can think of is Jeff Goldblum in Jurassic Park, remember? | ||
That's one giant pile of poo. | ||
Look at these dentures. | ||
Have you ever seen so many dentures? | ||
It's time for America to get back to work and fill our great downtowns again. | ||
Denture companies, man. | ||
You should sponsor this stuff. | ||
Look at this guy. | ||
Look at this guy, dude. | ||
What a frumpy-looking suit. | ||
Once again, work in person. | ||
Our schools are open. | ||
Let's keep it that way. | ||
We gotta park. | ||
Kids need to be in school. | ||
Pelosi, look at the people. | ||
unidentified
|
Look at this. | |
What is she doing? | ||
I'm not quite sure why they're standing. | ||
Why are we clapping? | ||
75% of adult Americans fully vaccinated in hospitalizations down by 77% Americans can remove their masks and stay in the classroom and move forward safely. | ||
We achieve this because we've provided free vaccines, treatments, tests, and masks. | ||
I am not sponsored by Coors Light, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
Many people are asking. | ||
No, I'm not. | ||
I'm going to soon send a request to Congress. | ||
The vast majority of Americans have used these tools. | ||
She's from Iowa, my home state. | ||
Such a disappointment. | ||
We'll continue vaccinating the world. | ||
We've sent 475 million vaccine doses to 112 countries. | ||
Thanks for the comic relief. | ||
You're welcome, Pamela. | ||
We won't stop. | ||
unidentified
|
We paid for those dentures, that's right. | |
I'm reading these comments here. | ||
Okay, here we go. | ||
That lady looks dead. | ||
Well, I'm not sure who you're talking about. | ||
You're going to have to narrow that one down. | ||
Who did they let in? | ||
Are you talking about the border? | ||
Well, just about everyone. | ||
This is just gross, says Lisa. | ||
So stop looking at COVID as a partisan dividing line. | ||
Interesting. | ||
Oh, look at this! | ||
unidentified
|
Oh, my God! | |
Oh, my God! | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, why you should have term limits on your screen right now. | ||
The Muppets. | ||
Muppets. | ||
I can hear Sam cracking beers. | ||
Producer Sam is cracking beers. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, even producer Sam can't take it anymore. | ||
And you can hear him popping Coronas over there. | ||
Sam's drinking Corona because he's vaccinated. | ||
Producer Sam. | ||
Sam Gorski. | ||
The best in business. | ||
Officer Moore was 27 years old. | ||
All right, here's Tim Scott. | ||
Tim Scott from South Carolina. | ||
I like Tim Scott. | ||
I don't know. | ||
Ben Sasse. | ||
Total goofball, Ben Sasse. | ||
Very disappointing, Ben Sasse. | ||
Shut the hell up. | ||
The President: We are in debt for their sacrifices, and we'll carry on their mission to restore the trust and safety This is truly, truly a Muppet show. | ||
This is the Muppet show. | ||
It's the Muppets, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
This is the Muppets. | ||
Sock puppets. | ||
I know what works. | ||
Investigating crime prevention in community policing. | ||
You're a terrorist! | ||
unidentified
|
You, mom and dad, you're terrorists! | |
You don't want your kids to learn that they're racists? | ||
They're four years old. | ||
Of course they're raising. | ||
Hold on. | ||
More Muppets. | ||
unidentified
|
My son got millions of dollars from a Ukrainian gas company. | |
that you all provided $350 billion that cities, states, and counties can use to hire more police and veterans. | ||
unidentified
|
I got you elected by supporting you in South Carolina. | |
Now half my family works for your administration. | ||
unidentified
|
Ha ha ha ha ha. | |
Here's a Nancy Pelosi muppet. | ||
This is my Muppet for Nancy Pelosi. | ||
We should all agree the answer is not to defund the police. | ||
unidentified
|
Ha ha ha. | |
We have too much fun. | ||
Ah, they got the Republicans to stand on this one. | ||
It must have been a good line. | ||
unidentified
|
What was it? | |
Fund them with resources and training. | ||
Resources and training they need to protect our communities. | ||
I ask Democrats and Republicans alike to pass my budget and keep our neighborhoods safe. | ||
And we'll do everything in my power to crack down on gun trafficking of ghost guns. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
You can buy online, assemble at home. | ||
Somebody said the best part tonight is watching your broadcast. | ||
I appreciate that. | ||
And I'm now almost two beers in. | ||
We're going to need a lot more. | ||
Who claps like that? | ||
What's wrong with you? | ||
Why are you clapping like that? | ||
Where did you learn to clap? | ||
Did you learn to clap at SeaWorld? | ||
These people are zombies. | ||
These people are zombie muppets. | ||
They're muppets. | ||
Look, repeal the liability shield that makes gun manufacturers the only industry in America that can't be sued. | ||
Red wave. | ||
Red wave, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
Imagine had we done that with the tobacco manufacturers. | ||
These laws don't infringe on the Second Amendment. | ||
They save lives. | ||
Oh, Lauren, it's my girl. | ||
The most fundamental right in America is the right to vote. | ||
She's tweeting. | ||
And have it counted. | ||
My girl Lauren is tweeting, though. | ||
Lauren Boebert coming on with us as soon as we're done here. | ||
Not only suppress the vote, we've been there before, but to subvert the entire election. | ||
We can't let this happen. | ||
Got it. | ||
Tonight I call on the Senate to pass. | ||
Pass the Freedom to Vote Act. | ||
It's already dead, you moron. | ||
I'm three ones in. | ||
Bro, I'm having a cocktail. | ||
The entire chat now is getting lit up by people saying what they're drinking in order to watch this. | ||
Oh, man. | ||
We gotta protect the Second Amendment like hell, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
Thank you for your service. | ||
Thank you, thank you, thank you. | ||
unidentified
|
We mean it. | |
Get up. | ||
Stand up and see you. | ||
Thank you. | ||
Yeah, trust me, they wouldn't be doing this for Clarence Thomas. | ||
We all know. | ||
unidentified
|
Yeah, right. | |
Thank you for your consistent live vote is what they're saying. | ||
The most serious constitutional responsibility a president has is nominating someone to serve on the United States Supreme Court. | ||
As I did four days ago, I've nominated the Circuit Court of Appeals, Katanji Brown Jackson. | ||
Oh, he got the name right this time. | ||
He forgot her name at the press conference yesterday. | ||
We'll continue in Justice Breyer's legacy of excellence. | ||
A former top litigator in private practice. | ||
a former federal public defender, from a family of public school educators and police officers. | ||
She's a consensus builder. | ||
Since she's been nominated, she's received a broad range of support, including the fraternal order of police and former judges supported by Democrats and Republicans. | ||
Folks, if we are to advance liberty and justice, we need to secure our border and fix the immigration system. | ||
unidentified
|
Oh. | |
Oh, no, you didn't. | ||
Oh, wait a second. | ||
We need to secure our border, Joe Biden says? | ||
And as you might guess, I think we can do both. | ||
Oh, there was a Build the Wall chant. | ||
Build the Wall chant. | ||
I heard it. | ||
To better detect drug smuggling. | ||
Dude, seriously. | ||
No, I mean, yes. | ||
That's exactly right. | ||
We're putting in place dedicated immigration judges in a significant larger number so families fleeing persecution and violence can have their... | ||
Let's go, Brandon. | ||
This is the let's go, Brandon moment. | ||
Unbelievable. | ||
We're securing commitments and supporting partners in South and Central America to host more refugees and secure their own borders. | ||
We can do all this while keeping lit the torch of liberty that has led the generation of immigrants to this land. | ||
What a sicko. | ||
What a complete and total dementia patient. | ||
unidentified
|
This guy has the audacity to say we need to secure our borders. | |
So businesses have workers they need. | ||
And families don't wait decades to reunite. | ||
It's not only the right thing to do, it's economically smart thing to do. | ||
That's why the immigration reform is supported by everyone from labor unions, the religious leaders, to the U.S. Chamber of Commerce. | ||
Let's get it done once and for all. | ||
But I feel like the Chamber of Commerce is some type of, like, right-wing think tank. | ||
The Chamber of Commerce is completely shot through by leftist radicals. | ||
Advancing liberty and justice also requires protecting the rights of women. | ||
That's how old Joe Biden is. | ||
Constance of the right affirmed by Roe v. | ||
Wade, standing precedent for half a century is under attack as never before. | ||
If you want to go forward, not backwards, we must protect access to health care. | ||
Why all these shots on Susan Collins? | ||
unidentified
|
I don't get this. | |
This is like the fourth time they've gone in on Susan Collins. | ||
unidentified
|
What are they planning here? | |
And folks, for our LGBTQ+ Americans, Let's finally get the Bipartisan Equality Act to my desk. | ||
The onslaught of state law is targeting transgender Americans and their families. | ||
It's simply wrong. | ||
I said last year, especially to our younger transgender Americans, I'll always have your back as your president so you can be yourself and reach your God-given potential. | ||
unidentified
|
transplendent Americans need a right to a Rust Belt. | |
As I've just demonstrated, what will often appear is we do not agree. | ||
And that we do agree on a lot more things Dude, they know they're losing so bad. | ||
They know they're losing. | ||
They know this is it. | ||
They're done. | ||
They know they're losing. | ||
And thank you, by the way. | ||
Thank you for the stars. | ||
Thank you for the super chats. | ||
I really deeply appreciate it. | ||
We're going on. | ||
We're putting on... | ||
unidentified
|
Oh, my. | |
Look at all those comments, son. | ||
unidentified
|
A lot of comments. | |
Four big things we can do together, in my view. | ||
First... | ||
The opioid epidemic is happening because we won't secure our border. | ||
I went to Arizona and saw Trump's wall sitting in the desert rotting. | ||
Get rid of outdated rules and stop doctors prescribing treatments. | ||
Stop the flow of illicit drugs by working with state and local law enforcement to go after the traffickers. | ||
How about building the wall? | ||
Asshat. | ||
You know, you should know you're not alone. | ||
I believe in recovery and I celebrate the 23 million, 23 million Americans in recovery. | ||
Is he going to hand out fentanyl? | ||
Second. | ||
He's going to hand out fentanyl, free fentanyl pipes? | ||
Let's take our mental health, especially among our children whose lives and education have been turned upside down. | ||
Oh, horrible. | ||
This woman should have lost in Michigan. | ||
John James, what were you doing, dude? | ||
This is the Titanic. | ||
One of the commenters. | ||
I didn't catch the name. | ||
This is like the Titanic. | ||
This is exactly right. | ||
Ah, yes. | ||
Bullying. | ||
Our biggest problem today. | ||
As Francis Haugen, who is here tonight with us, has shown we must hold social media platforms accountable for the national experiment they're conducting on our children for profit. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
Oh, no! | ||
You brought in the Facebook whistleblower? | ||
Oh, come on! | ||
Oh, this is embarrassing. | ||
Thank you for the courage you showed. | ||
Do you know she works with Jen Psaki's old PR firm? | ||
Do you want to know why she's there? | ||
Jen Psaki's old PR firm. | ||
Totally running this op. | ||
That lady's an op. | ||
No, no. | ||
That lady's an op. | ||
This is what evil looks like. | ||
What a joke. | ||
By the way, no one gives a damn about Francis Howell. | ||
Nobody's even said that woman's name in like 10 months. | ||
Oh, Pelosi almost fell down. | ||
Too much involving fluid. | ||
Ah, okay. | ||
We have a sacred obligation to equip those we send to war and care for those in their family when they come home. | ||
Is that why you looked at your watch multiple times during the dignified transfer of the 13 soldiers that you killed? | ||
Blood on your hands. | ||
Yes. | ||
Breathing in toxic smoke. | ||
What is wrong with Nancy Pelosi? | ||
unidentified
|
What is this? | |
What the hell is going on? | ||
Did you just see that? | ||
What the hell is happening with her? | ||
These burn pits that incinerate waste, the waste of war, medical and hazards material, jet fuel, and so much more. | ||
Wait, what's going on with Nancy? | ||
Look at her hands. | ||
What the hell is going on with Nancy Pelosi? | ||
No joke. | ||
What's happening? | ||
A flag-draped car? | ||
There we go. | ||
unidentified
|
Yes! | |
One of those soldiers was my son, Major Boba. | ||
Yes! | ||
I don't know for sure if the burn pit that he lived near, that his hooch was near, in Iraq and... | ||
That was... | ||
I swear. | ||
Okay. | ||
That was Lauren Boebert. | ||
That was Lauren Boebert saying, what about the 13 Americans that you killed? | ||
unidentified
|
That's right. | |
To find out everything we can. | ||
committed to military families like Danielle Robinson from Ohio, the widow of Sergeant First Class Heath Robinson. | ||
He was born a soldier, Army National Guard, combat medic in Kosovo and Iraq. | ||
Stationed near Baghdad, just yards. | ||
That was Lauren Boeber. | ||
The size of football fields. | ||
Danielle is here with us tonight. | ||
They love going to Ohio State football games. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
The conflagration Of Joe Biden, whose son did not die in action and has absolutely no military connection to his death. | ||
We're not saying that it's not tragic, but this conflagration that Joe Biden's son somehow, like, died, was killed in action or wounded in action. | ||
This is some of the most despicable stuff. | ||
We're not saying it's not tragic that Joe Biden's kid, Joe Biden's son, perished. | ||
He had brain cancer. | ||
But Joe Biden's son was out of the military for, like, a decade? | ||
Joe Biden's son was a, like, the Attorney General of Delaware? | ||
Right? | ||
He was, like, going into the family business? | ||
So it's such an insult for Joe Biden to sit there and say that, like, this is the same thing if your son came back from Afghanistan inside of a flag-draped coffin while I'm looking at my watch during the dignified transfer. | ||
That's the same thing as my kid who died of brain cancer, if I'm remembering this correctly. | ||
Later on, much later in life and long after he had left the military. | ||
This is personal. | ||
What a gaslight. | ||
What a gaslight. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
Hunter Biden was kicked out of the military for smoking crack. | ||
Fact check, true. | ||
And so many of you. | ||
So many of you have lost someone you love. | ||
Husband, wife, son, daughter, mom, dad. | ||
Cancer is the number two cause of death in America, second only to heart disease. | ||
Last month, I announced the plan to supercharge the cancer moonshot that President Obama asked me to lead six years ago. | ||
Our goal is to cut cancer death rates by at least 50% over the next 25 years. | ||
I think we can do better than that. | ||
Turn cancers from death sentences into treatable diseases. | ||
Yep. | ||
More support for patients and their families. | ||
Confirmed. | ||
To get there, I call on Congress to fund what I call ARPA-H. | ||
unidentified
|
About the 13 advanced research American projects died in Afghanistan. | |
Agency for Health. | ||
Lauren Boebert, Congresswoman Lauren Boebert will be joining us. | ||
Stay on this live. | ||
Lauren Boebert will be joining us live. | ||
Tell us about it. | ||
Lauren Boebert shouted at Joe Biden about the 13 dead Americans to drive breakthroughs in cancer, Alzheimer's and diabetes, and more. | ||
A unity agenda for the nation. | ||
We can do these things. | ||
It's within our power. | ||
And I don't see a partisan edge to any one of those four things. | ||
unidentified
|
My fellow Americans tonight and my mansion right now, I'm Joe Manchin. | |
We've gathered in this sacred space a citadel of democracy in this capital. | ||
Generation after generation of Americans have debated great questions amid great strife and have done great things. | ||
We fought for freedom. | ||
Sun-down syndrome. | ||
Here we go. | ||
10 p.m. | ||
We built the strongest, freest, and most prosperous nation the world has ever known. | ||
Now is the hour. | ||
Our moment of responsibility. | ||
Our test of resolve and conscience. | ||
Of history itself. | ||
It is in this moment that our character of this generation is formed. | ||
Our purpose is found. | ||
Our future is forged. | ||
Well, I know this nation. | ||
We'll meet the test. | ||
Protect freedom and liberty. | ||
Expand fairness to opportunity. | ||
And we will save democracy. | ||
As hard as those times have been, I'm more optimistic about America today than I've been my whole life. | ||
I'm more optimistic! | ||
Save the Galapagos Turtles! | ||
Save the Galapagos Turtles! | ||
We're the only nation on earth that has always turned every crisis we've faced into an opportunity. | ||
The only nation that can be defined by a single word, possibilities. | ||
So on this night, on our 245th year as a nation, I've come to report on the state of the nation, the state of the union. | ||
And my report is this. | ||
The state of the union is strong because you, the American people, are strong. | ||
The state of Union is strong! | ||
unidentified
|
Because you're racist! | |
We are stronger today than we were a year ago. | ||
This is the optimistic end to this speech. | ||
unidentified
|
Okay, got it. | |
And we'll be stronger a year from now. | ||
unidentified
|
From the end of the day. | |
Loud noises. | ||
To meet and overcome the challenges of our time. | ||
unidentified
|
And we will, as one people. | |
United States of America. | ||
God bless you all. | ||
And may God protect our troops. | ||
Thank you. | ||
unidentified
|
Go get him! | |
Look at his gross warty bald spot. | ||
Yuck. | ||
You never get to see that shot. | ||
unidentified
|
Yuck. | |
Go get him! | ||
Alright, this is really funny, actually, watching the president leave. | ||
unidentified
|
Hold on. | |
You gotta see that this is really funny. | ||
It's always funny watching the president leave. | ||
Come on, keep it up. | ||
Keep it up, Sam. | ||
unidentified
|
Let's watch. | |
It's always very creepy. | ||
unidentified
|
*grunt* | |
What? | ||
I can't believe... | ||
First off, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
What a clown show. | ||
I have never seen a worse State of the Union speech. | ||
That thing was a disaster. | ||
But it's the ending that I cannot get over. | ||
I cannot get over the ending of that speech. | ||
The inspirational... | ||
The inspirational commentary at the end of the speech... | ||
Oh, God, look at Maxine Waters standing there. | ||
unidentified
|
Oh, eww. | |
Oh man, gross. | ||
unidentified
|
Ah, Tom Carper. | |
It's Tom Carper. | ||
I got a Carper bag on my head. | ||
Oh, Jayapal giving him a hug. | ||
There's some N95, KN95 masks. | ||
Man, these people are done. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, I got to tell you, stay tuned. | ||
Lauren Boebert's in touch with our team right now. | ||
Lauren Boebert will be coming on live with us. | ||
We may have to pause for just a moment, but stay on this live feed. | ||
Lauren Boebert coming on with us. | ||
Okay. | ||
We may put up, like, an image to pause. | ||
That doesn't mean the live feed's going away. | ||
That'll be just us getting our boxes ready for a live broadcast with Lauren Boebert for her response to the State of the Union. | ||
Ah, yes. | ||
Oh, yes. | ||
Yes, yes, yes. | ||
Here's Mike Milley. | ||
unidentified
|
I want to understand about right rage, and I'm white. | |
That's what he just said to Joe Biden. | ||
unidentified
|
Maxine Waters is like, find a Trump supporter. | |
If you find Trump supporters, you get out there and you create a crowd. | ||
You tell them you're not welcome here. | ||
Yeah, party unity, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
Rosa DeLauro, everyone. | ||
Look at that purple hair. | ||
She's such a freak. | ||
I love her. | ||
She's a congresswoman from Connecticut. | ||
She's just so weird. | ||
I kind of love Rosa DeLauro. | ||
I don't know her. | ||
I don't know her. | ||
I met her once. | ||
He's a total weirdo. | ||
Look at that. | ||
Look at the fake hair. | ||
Fake hair! | ||
Joe Biden doesn't have any real hair. | ||
Joe Biden's bald as a bat. | ||
There are photos of him from the 70s where he's just bald as a bat. | ||
Why is Maxine Waters, like, clinging on to Joe Biden like a barnacle at the bottom? | ||
I'm an old wooden ship. | ||
What's going on? | ||
Very strange. | ||
Maybe, maybe, maybe Maxine Waters is Joe Biden's Rust Belt. | ||
Who knows? | ||
Rust Belt. | ||
That is the theme of, that is the theme of the night. | ||
Sorry, gotta go. | ||
Alright, that's okay. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, we'll be on with Lauren Boebert here momentarily. | ||
unidentified
|
Thank you. | |
We are waiting on Lauren Boebert. | ||
We need to take a second there to go ahead and get in contact with her. | ||
And she is on her way, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
So here is Joe Biden. | ||
We're going to sort of like comment on Joe Biden, what we see here from the C-SPAN feed. | ||
I am Benny Johnson. | ||
Thank you for watching the State of the Union with us live. | ||
This is... | ||
A Coors Light. | ||
I am on my third beer of the night. | ||
Drink responsibly, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
But pretty embarrassing. | ||
Embarrassing indeed. | ||
What a absolute garbage pit. | ||
What an absolute garbage pit that all was. | ||
Ah, yes. | ||
So, we had Joe Biden with, like, multiple... | ||
Yes, that's right. | ||
That's right. | ||
Lauren Boebert coming. | ||
Lauren Boebert is on her way. | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, will be on live soon with us. | ||
She has confirmed that she said this to Joe Biden. | ||
You put them in it. | ||
Talking about flag-draped coffins. | ||
Yep, that is the line. | ||
Joe Biden was talking about the flag-draped coffins of American patriots and Lauren Boebert saying, hey, you put those soldiers in those flag-draped coffins. | ||
The 13 American soldiers from Afghanistan. | ||
So here we go. | ||
The president sits there and kind of like kisses. | ||
Look at this. | ||
COVID's over! | ||
Wow! | ||
COVID's over! | ||
Everyone's hugging. | ||
Everyone's kissing. | ||
Look at that! | ||
Wow! | ||
COVID over! | ||
Biden's hugging people. | ||
He's kissing people. | ||
Oh, here we go. | ||
Al Green. | ||
Good job. | ||
Here's Al Green asking for an autograph. | ||
First time in human history that anyone's ever asked Joe Biden for an autograph. | ||
Ah, yes. | ||
Here's the selfie request. | ||
Embarrassing. | ||
And now it's like empty. | ||
There's no one there. | ||
No one wants to be seen with Joe Biden. | ||
No one wants to be seen with Brandon. | ||
I got it. | ||
Sniffing people. | ||
Yeah, that's right. | ||
Gross. | ||
unidentified
|
Mm-hmm. | |
Don't know which member of Congress that is. | ||
Pride myself on knowing most members of Congress. | ||
But can't quite tell. | ||
Joe Biden. | ||
This was supposed to be a reset for Joe Biden. | ||
This is not a reset for Joe Biden. | ||
This speech was terrible. | ||
The speech didn't do anything. | ||
It didn't move any balls. | ||
It didn't move any brain cells either. | ||
Joe Biden just being... | ||
Oh, a total doofus. | ||
Sheila Jackson Lee! | ||
Sheila Jackson Lee! | ||
Here we go. | ||
This conversation is going to last a while. | ||
Sheila Jackson Lee, one of the most corrupt members of Congress. | ||
Certainly one of the dumbest. | ||
Ah! | ||
Now I know who that was. | ||
That lady's awful. | ||
The one who was talking to Joe Biden. | ||
It's actually my parents' member of Congress. | ||
Her name escapes me right now, unfortunately. | ||
Rock Island, Illinois. | ||
She's terrible. | ||
She's leaving Congress this year. | ||
Sherry Jacobs, I think? | ||
Whatever. | ||
All right. | ||
Lauren Boebert coming on soon. | ||
unidentified
|
Mm hmm. | |
What's going on with Brandon? | ||
Ladies and gentlemen, did you like the livestream? | ||
For those of you still with us, what's going on? | ||
Did you like the livestream? | ||
We had a hilarious time. | ||
Nancy Pelosi was just sitting there rolling her dentures around in her mouth. | ||
A reminder, Nancy Pelosi won't be there next year. | ||
Nancy Pelosi will be gone from that seat next year. | ||
It'll be Kevin McCarthy ripping up Joe Brandon's speech. | ||
These wicked, wicked people. | ||
I can't believe that they did that. | ||
What about just scum? | ||
What about just scumbags? | ||
So you have Kevin McCarthy, who wasn't on camera very much. | ||
Too bad. | ||
Joe Brandon sitting there signing as Brandon. | ||
And Nancy Pelosi, again, won't be there next year. | ||
Lauren Boebert will be on. | ||
Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
Sorry about that. | ||
I missed the comments there for just a second. | ||
I got a message from my team. | ||
I thank you very much for watching along with us. | ||
We had tens of thousands of people watching our live roast of Joe Brandon. | ||
We'll do this. | ||
I like this format. | ||
We'll do this all the time. | ||
And then we'll put the comments on the screen. | ||
We're going to be working on, like, getting the comments into more of an interactive. | ||
But this is good. | ||
I mean, this is good. | ||
It's been fun. | ||
I've been able to, like, actually, I can read the comments. | ||
I can watch them. | ||
And we can respond and we can have a conversation. | ||
That's what this is all about. | ||
You'll be able to have a conversation with Lauren Boebert when she is up. | ||
And we should be set. | ||
But I just want to say thank you very much for watching. | ||
I'm seeing all the comments rolling in right now. | ||
I just really appreciate it. | ||
I mean, you know, it's us trying to add a little bit of humor. | ||
A little bit of comedy so that you don't have to watch it alone in your living room and like scream and throw your beer at the TV. | ||
You can set throw your beer directly into the back of your mouth and have a drink with me as we watch Brandon. | ||
Brandon, our country. | ||
What a... | ||
Gross spectacle. | ||
What a creepy spectacle. | ||
What a... | ||
just a disgusting, syphilitic, embalmer's mirage this entire thing was. | ||
Joe Biden, the worst president in American history. | ||
The polls show it. | ||
One dumb speech isn't going to change anything. | ||
The Americans know what's true. | ||
Americans go down to their gas station and pay for $4 gas. | ||
Americans get their grocery bill, and it's twice what it used to be. | ||
Americans know it. | ||
Americans aren't dumb. | ||
Although 81 million Americans, quote-unquote, voted for Joe Biden. | ||
And so, we will accept your apology. | ||
You owe us all an apology. | ||
Thanks, Benny. | ||
It's been a blast. | ||
Thank you, Benny, for providing us a safe place to endure the circus. | ||
$5 gas in California. | ||
$3.75 gas in Pennsylvania. | ||
F Joe Biden. | ||
Trump is our president. | ||
This stream was great, Benny. | ||
Thank you. | ||
You're welcome. | ||
Of course. | ||
This is what we're here for. | ||
We'll get better at it. | ||
We had a couple of little, you know, little, you know, little things. | ||
We had to flip feeds here and there, and I'm sure there were little technical glitches, but we're going to get better. | ||
Why would you take a photo with Brandon? | ||
Why would you want that? | ||
Why would you want a photo with Brandon? | ||
Can someone explain that to me? | ||
I have no idea. | ||
What a bunch of LARPers. | ||
What a bunch of LARPers. | ||
$3.99 gas in Kansas. | ||
What's your gas price? | ||
Show it to me in the comments. | ||
I'm watching. | ||
$3.50 gas in New Hampshire. | ||
Yikes. | ||
Goodness gracious. | ||
What's the price of gas? | ||
Benny the King. | ||
I am not the king, ladies and gentlemen. | ||
Jesus is the king. | ||
$3.79. | ||
Thank you, Puppy Clown Show State of the Union. | ||
$4 gas in Connecticut? | ||
$5.45 in California? | ||
$4 gas in Chicago? | ||
Of course. | ||
$4.99 in California? | ||
That's good. | ||
Oh, gross. | ||
Gross. | ||
$3.59 in New Jersey? | ||
$3.79 in Scranton? | ||
Yuck. | ||
$4 in Washington State for gas? | ||
Biden is a crook. | ||
It's true. | ||
$3.50? | ||
$3.50? | ||
I'm seeing a lot of $3.50s. | ||
$3.60 in Indiana? | ||
Disgusting. | ||
One of the worst speeches I've ever heard, said Wanda, Little Caesar's $5 pizza. | ||
Somebody said Little Caesar's $5 pizza is now $6. | ||
Yeah. | ||
It's true. | ||
$3.39. | ||
I paid $2? | ||
Wow, what did you pay for that? | ||
It's $5 gas in Canada, someone just said. | ||
Well, you got Canada. | ||
You got problems. | ||
Yikes. | ||
$5.29 in California. | ||
Yuck. | ||
Benny, we love you. | ||
I love you back. | ||
I love you back. | ||
That's why we're doing this. | ||
We've been live for almost two hours. | ||
And I thank you all for watching with all of us. | ||
$3.89 in Texas. | ||
Goodness gracious. | ||
Dollar stores now $1.25. | ||
That's exactly right. | ||
$4 in Oregon. | ||
unidentified
|
Ugh. | |
Love Oregon, though. | ||
unidentified
|
Hmm. | |
Maybe gas will get to $85. | ||
Maybe gas will get to $81 million a gallon to match the number of people who voted for Joe Biden. | ||
Wink. | ||
$3 in North Dakota, $3.49 in Orange Park, Florida. | ||
Yep. | ||
Diesel in Michigan is $4.15. | ||
Yuck. | ||
Unbelievable. | ||
Have you ever seen gas prices this high? | ||
I never have. | ||
Oh, here comes the C-SPAN commentary. | ||
unidentified
|
Hmm. | |
Length of the State of the Union. | ||
unidentified
|
And then West Wing tonight, West Wing reports, these are the mentions of certain words. | |
Again, ladies and gentlemen, we are waiting for Lauren Boebert. | ||
unidentified
|
Words like jobs and the economy in his speech tonight. | |
And then if you were wondering, who was the designated survivor? | ||
It was Commerce Secretary Gina Raimondo. | ||
She was the designated survivor from the Cabinet, chosen to stay away in case something would happen. | ||
Supreme Court justices in the chamber. | ||
Jennifer Epstein with Bloomberg reporting five members of the Supreme Court were in the chamber tonight. | ||
Chief Justice John Roberts and Justices Stephen Breyer, Elena Kagan, Brett Kavanaugh, and Amy Coney Barrett. | ||
That left conservative Justices Alito, Thomas, and Gorsuch not attending along with Liberal Justice Sotomayor. | ||
And then also... | ||
We told you this earlier. | ||
It looked like there was a signed seating tonight. | ||
You might have noticed that members were spaced out. |