Kyle and Ethan, from The Babylon Bee, are joined by Wes Halula, a writer and producer on Church People, to talk about the prospects of conservative and Christian films and also how the Babylon Bee gets away with spreading disinformation by putting "LOL, JK" at the end of every article according to Wikipedia editors. The guys also discuss the sad news of contemporary Christian music pioneer Carman and radio giant Rush Limbaugh passing away. There's weird news, stuff that's good, and glorious hate mail! Introduction Kyle, Ethan, and Wes talk about losing Carman and Rush this week. Stuff That's Good Kyle likes Jon Foreman's Departures. Ethan likes Wes's movie Church People. Weird News California man's wallet lost in Antarctica returned after 53 years Rapper Len Martin Starts Gorilla Glue Challenge after thinking Tessica Brown's story about being unable to get Gorilla Glue out of her hair was a hoax, Immediately gets red solo cup stuck to his face Mysterious Trail of Four-Toed Footprints Discovered Atop Frosty Car in England Musician Turns Late Uncle's Skeleton into Working Guitar Ted Cruz is rocking a mullet now It's freezing cold in Texas, The Weather Channel tweeted on January 21 that February would be unseasonably WARM 'I Was Gonna Be A Mashed Potato': Florida Boy Recounts Garbage Truck Horror Actor Sean Penn suggests the pope should "impeach" evangelical Christian leaders 20-foot-2-inch bear made from roses breaks Guinness record The guys from the Babylon Bee talk about the conversations by people editing our Wikipedia page about whether what we do can be legally considered "satire" or how we get away with spreading harmful disinformation by writing "lol jk" at the end of all our stories. Topic of the Week What are the prospects for independent conservative media? Is there a shift? Can Hollywood lose its grip on entertainment? Hate Mail Denise is saddened to see us post mistruths and have a misleading agenda. Subscriber Portion Kyle, Ethan, and Wes react to Carman's Satan Bite The Dust and Addicted To Jesus. Subscriber Update Mailbag Tim sends us an audio message from across the ocean wondering where Dave DeAndrea has been. Bonus Hate Mail Terry thinks we are backing AOC and her lies! Subscriber Headlines of the Week Wes answers The Ten Questions!
In a world of fake news, we bring you up-to-the-minute factual inaccuracy and a heavy dose of moral truth.
With your hosts, Kyle Mann and Ethan Nicole.
This is the Babylon Bee.
Fake news you can trust.
Hello, everybody.
I'm Kyle Mann, editor-in-chief of the Babylon Bee, and this is my buddy.
I'm Ethan Nicole, Kyle's buddy.
Who's also the creative director of the Babylon Bee?
And we drove to Hollywood today, and we saw a guy lying in the gutter.
Oh, hey, guys.
And we just grabbed him.
We cleaned him up, got him a little bit of one of Kyle's hoodies, made him presentable and some glasses in the costume store.
I'd love to be your buddy if that's an okay.
That'd be great.
He's my best buddy, but you can earn your way of doing it.
Second best is fine.
That's okay.
Second place.
He's have to murder all of his previous buddies to get to the top.
There can be only one.
I can do it.
I'm not afraid.
That's a movie idea for you.
That's a free movie.
Okay.
So this is Wes Holula.
Oh, that's right.
My buddy.
I'm your buddy.
Yeah.
I'm your number one buddy.
So we go way back.
We wrote some Veggie Tales together.
We did.
The Abomination.
Yeah.
I was there for like 15 minutes.
Yeah, you were there for the worst part of the whole.
Yeah.
It was the worst.
I think that my biggest contribution to Veggie Tales was that they gave us a giant stack of post-it notes, and I spent hours writing fart along the edges.
All of the things.
So for long after I was gone, you guys were still using my fart post-it notes.
Yeah.
That's right.
Yeah.
So you wrote the death of Laura Carrot episode that was critically panned, I assume.
Sure.
Yeah, it was the role of the nadir of Veggie Tales.
Yep.
A little dark for a kid's show.
Pretty dark, but they learned a valuable lesson.
Yeah.
And I'm not going to let the studios mess with my art.
Yeah.
So it's good.
I'm glad you have your integrity.
That's right.
No work, but.
No work.
Integrity.
That's why you found me in the gutter.
Yeah, that's right.
Well, it actually is dark, not because of the death of Laura Carrot, but the death of some actual people.
Oh, that was an excellent transition.
Thank you.
Untimely.
Especially, I mean, I don't think anybody thought we were going to lose Carmen.
We've talked about Carmen many times in this show.
We're obsessed with him.
And I mean, we were literally talking to people that know Carmen.
Just yesterday, we talked to a guy.
Yesterday we were talking to a guy that worked on a stage show.
He's like, I talked to him for an hour last week.
It's kind of awkward now because now we have all these interviews pre-recorded where we ask people about Carmen and we go on and on about Carmen.
Yeah.
In our 10 questions, question number one, have you met Carmen?
Yeah.
We want to know about Carmen.
We're not going to retire that question.
No.
Because people could.
I still want to get to where we have an awesome full Carmen episode that's like the deep dive.
Yeah, we may have to expedite it because we really want to get that going.
We've got to get that out now.
The Carmen special.
We need a documentary guy.
I'm here for you.
Wes does documentary.
Okay.
Carmen documentary.
I'm in.
I'm totally in.
But yeah, Carmen died at 65.
It's not like complications from surgery, maybe a heart attack right after surgery in Vegas, and that's just terrible.
Yeah.
The guy changed CCM forever.
I mean, he kind of invented CCM in a lot of ways.
Right.
I mean, you had Keith Green and Larry Norman, but he had this theatrical flair about him.
He was a showman.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We've looked at some of his videos on this.
The greatest podcast.
I mean, forget Hugh Johnson.
He played to the largest audience ever, Christian music, I think.
Oh, really?
He was like 70 or 80,000 people.
Wow.
Still holds the record.
It's incredible.
Can I read, me and Wes crafted our Carmen article this morning outside of our cigars?
It's been edited a little bit, by the way.
I'm curious what you edited.
Carmen passes away after a lifelong addiction to Jesus.
Now, the goal of this article is to work as many of his song titles in as we could.
So you might have edited some out.
Yeah, so just so you guys know, Ethan had more song titles in here.
Well, I had to edit it for accuracy because you were talking about how he's like, get in the ambulance and driven to the hospital, but that wasn't.
He was already at.
Oh, well, that's he didn't die of an addiction to Jesus.
I know.
What are you, Snopes?
We have to have accurate satire.
Oh, my gosh.
Famed Christian pop legend and rapper Carmen Licciardadello.
I don't know how to say his name.
No, that's correct.
Just Carmen.
Has passed away after a lifelong addiction to Jesus.
Doctors said that the effects of the addiction were coming on strong.
We needed a sound effect whenever we hit a song.
Oh, I'm here for you.
Hang on.
I've got some sound effects, guys.
Before his final moments.
He thinks he's a shock chalker.
He thinks we need more like a morning show.
Yeah, you guys are kind of low energy, and I thought maybe I could bring.
He's low energy Kyle.
He's been called that.
Yeah, see?
Oh, I'm low energy too.
Yeah.
And I thought I'd bring some fun.
So when have I been called low energy?
Perfect.
Oh, that's excellent.
Okay.
They've been more just a bell ding.
How about every time you do a song title, I'll do a little sound effect for it.
I can.
Okay.
Okay.
The effects of the addiction were coming on strong.
It's too long.
Oh, that's terrible.
It just needs like a.
I don't know how to stop it.
We should have planned this a little better.
I can't make it stop, guys.
Guys.
Oh, there we go.
Ends of the park.
This is the death of Carmen.
We can't be funny.
We can't do that.
But you don't think he would appreciate some games.
Guys, I think he would love this.
If you find a hobo in the gutter, don't ask him to be on your podcast.
Okay, okay.
Well, then.
Before his final moments, when a family member said his last words were, Satan, bite the dust.
Okay.
Doctors hooked Carmen up to an IV.
This blood's for you.
I just hit it randomly.
Oh, that wasn't a song title.
That's not a song title.
Doctors hooked Carmen to an IV.
That said song title.
This blood's for you is, so that counts for that one.
A doctor said, man, are you for real?
This is good.
This is good.
One nurse replied.
This is the most disrespectful.
We're not being disrespectful.
No.
We did some tests on this blood.
This blood.
I just like a bell ding.
I'm always like, oh, that's all I want.
That's that's terrible.
Are you going to do a seven of them?
That's terrible.
What's happening here?
Eventually, the addiction took over, and he succumbed to a righteous invasion of truth.
At a Pearlie Gates press conference, late Christian musician Keith Green announced, we're excited to welcome home the champion.
He could have done like a more epic at the end there, but yeah.
It just needed like a little something really epic.
All right, let me look for doot diabeto.
No, we're good.
We're done.
It's over.
All right.
Well, when we really record this podcast, that'll be for sure.
Wow.
In addition.
Okay, okay, well.
Okay, that was good.
In addition, Roche Lindbaugh passed away.
Oh, I got some sound effects.
No, no.
We have no funny article in sound effects for Rush Limbaugh.
All we have is a lot of really, really, really horrible tweets.
Twitter is just because I saw trending Rush Limbaugh has died rot in hell.
I think it was one of the trending things.
That's a hashtag.
These people are really original.
Yeah, that's nice.
Party of love, unity, progress.
Tolerance.
Tolerance.
Not tolerance, healing the name.
Tolerance is out.
Coming together, healing the nation.
Unity.
They've been talking about unity.
I was always fascinated by the extreme hate of Rush.
I grew up, my dad lived in a van when I was a kid, and he just listened to Rush non-stop.
Sure.
So that's my main memory of Rush is just like, he's this voice going on in my dad's van, my homeless dad's van.
Which he must be self-hating because anybody who's homeless and is Republican.
Right, right.
Idiot.
Yep.
A total idiot.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I grew up in a very blue-collar house that was very conservative and we got a lot of the like, but you guys are blue-collar.
You don't.
Yeah.
Why would you.
Why are you just getting brainwashed by the rich?
Right.
Yeah.
My Buick at a 1978 Buick in high school.
The FM radio didn't work.
The AM radio worked.
And so all I could really listen to was talk radio and, you know, sports.
Yeah.
Rush Limbaugh, he was a nice, you know, voice or whatever.
And so I got into listening to him for a few years there.
I do think that with Rush, a lot of the people that hate him don't get him in the way they don't get us.
Sure.
Because they think if you make jokes like this, you're making them from this place of like absolute hate.
And like, because you're this warrior trying to win because that's how they are about their jokes and stuff.
And so they can't see like the facetiousness.
He's like this uncle-type figure that just kind of...
You know, there's a word for that.
What's that?
Avuncular.
Avuncular.
He's very avuncular.
Yeah.
It means he has the word uncle in there.
Yeah, it means uncle-like.
Oh, really?
I didn't know we needed that word, but today we need it.
Yeah.
Avuncular radio host has passed.
Yeah.
I was thinking we could have like got stacks of paper just in honor of him, just to be like shuffling up.
Shuffling constantly.
You know, because that was like a constant soundtrack to his show.
Yeah, yeah.
Stacking up.
I remember when he mentioned the Babylon B a couple of times on the show.
And he would like, someone just gave me this article from this website, The Babylon B. You know, and he would do it through.
Someone print it off the internet.
They would print it off and they would give it to him.
Yeah, printed Babylon B article.
Funny stuff, very funny stuff.
And he'd throw it, you know, and it's like, whatever.
That's awesome.
I was honored to be on his paper at least one point in his life.
That's very cool.
I grew up in Kansas City and he got his start working for the Royals, actually.
Wow.
So he actually was a baseball team.
It's a baseball team.
You knew that.
That was excellent.
Yeah.
That's the one with the red strings on the ball.
The stitching, the red stitching?
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
It's a baseball.
Interesting story, huh?
Oh, that's it?
That's all I got.
That's it.
So rest in peace, Rush and Carmen.
Yeah.
Now let's move on to some stuff that's good.
But now, this week's edition of stuff that's good.
All right, Kyle.
I've seen you tweeting about this.
Yeah.
John Foreman came out with a new album, and that means that that's my stuff that's good this week.
It's called Departures, and it's excellent.
I had to figure it out for a while.
I was like, oh, that's a Switchfoot guy.
It's the Switchfoot guy.
So basically, anything he writes for Switchfoot that has too much Jesus in it gets moved to his solo stuff.
Interesting.
Well, and stuff that's a little more focusy and doesn't fit.
So it's very Bob Dylan inspired.
And to me, it's the perfect album for like 2020, 2021.
Very hopeful.
Excellent stuff.
Departures.
If you're going to listen to one song, listen to Thanks Be to God or Heaven in a Place Called Earth, I think is the other one.
Okay.
Yep.
I'm in.
All right.
My stuff that's good is a movie that I haven't seen yet.
But Wes made it, and it's coming out.
I wanted to do a spit take.
Hang on.
You ready?
So Wes made a movie.
What was your involvement in this movie?
Like, did you fully write it and everything?
Or how would you do?
I partially wrote it.
Partially wrote it.
You wrote all the good parts?
I wrote the funny stuff for sure.
It's a movie called Church People.
My involvement was a little bit weird.
I've written a lot of stuff for Stephen Baldwin.
I wrote a movie long ago called Midnight Clear that was kind of actually why we moved out here because it did pretty well.
And Stephen was in it.
And for some reason, he just kind of latched on to me, like, hey, you're my guy.
And so he'd work in projects and bring me in to do rewrites or we'd create stuff together or whatever.
And so he called me and said, hey, we got this movie.
At the time, it was called Youth Group.
And he said it was written by a guy named Thor Ramsey.
And I was like, I know Thor.
He's a friend of mine.
When we moved to LA, Thor came and helped us move in.
He's a Christian comedian.
He had a show called Bananas for a while.
Really funny guy.
And so Stephen brought me in to basically, you know, Thor is a comedian and he wrote all of this funny stuff in this movie, but it kind of needed to be turned into a movie.
And so Thor and I sat together and for a long time we did rewrites on the movie and kind of tried to keep the funny, but turn it into an actual story and make some new funny stuff.
So Thor and I wrote it together.
A guy named Bob Sands wrote a draft that we kind of used some of that stuff a little bit.
And yeah, so then I was a writer and a producer on the film.
Okay.
Yeah.
It was really fun.
Oh.
And it's taken a while for it to finally come out.
Oh my gosh.
Holy cow.
Well, those guys, so Thor and the director, Christopher Shonshaw, they've been working on it for years before we filmed it.
I mean, for years and years and years.
And then we got it.
I kind of came in almost pre-production and we did a rewrite.
And so then we filmed it.
This was, I'm not good with time, but it was when Donald Trump was one of 12 Republican candidates for president is when we filmed it.
Yeah, no way.
So was that 12 years ago?
I don't, I need no concept now.
So a different time.
Yeah.
It was a different universe for sure, honestly.
And we kind of a worse universe in some ways.
In some ways.
Yeah, we really were like, oh, I don't know if this movie's ever coming out, man.
I guess it's just not going to happen.
So maybe that's because a lot of Christian films feel like they're like behind by like 10 years.
Maybe that's why it developed in hell.
We were currently culturally relevant, so we had to wait.
Yeah.
Hey, we actually write really edgy stuff, and then it just gets delayed 10, 20 years.
That's the problem by the time it comes.
No, it's super fun, though.
It's got Joey Fatone in it, and it's got, oh, shoot, I'm totally blanking.
The guy from Scrubs.
Donald Fazon.
Donald Faison, who is so funny in the movie.
He's really, really funny.
Stephen Baldwin's in it, and he got his brother Billy Baldwin to be in it.
It's first time they've ever been in a movie together.
And Billy Baldwin and his wife, Chyna Phillips, they're both in it, and they play like this, like super open-minded, hippie couple that's doing a really terrible job of raising their son.
And they're kind of like, well, we don't think of ourselves as parents, but we're all just friends living here together.
It's like super, they're so funny.
And they went all in on performing it.
It was really like, dang, they nailed it.
That was really funny.
Do you get Kirk Cameron or Kevin Sorbo in there?
We only were allowed one Christian movie superstar.
So Stephen Ball Budget filmed that role and we couldn't.
You got 50 bucks.
Well, they all are very.
You can't, it's kind of like, you know, there's certain kinds of animals you can't cage together, like Siamese Fighting Fish.
Christian celebrities.
You can only have one.
You can't tear each other apart with their teeth for sure.
So Church People comes out March 13th.
March 13th.
Yeah.
It's not a Friday, is it?
Oh, I think it is.
Oh, no.
Yikes.
But it's also available Saturday the 14th and Sunday the 15th.
We're not a superstitious people.
Can we play the trailer without getting flagged on YouTube?
I think so.
Okay.
I would love it if you did.
Let's play the trailer.
I told you if we broke attendance records, I'd get the church logo tattooed on my arm.
Yeah, remember back when we first started?
All we did was preach the gospel.
Oh, Superman works.
I like Superman.
Guy, what do you think?
What happened to you?
Me?
Your dad is the one with the gimmicks.
The power of the Holy Spirit propels us.
I just went to church to get back to the gospel.
Problem is, you're trying to get your message across.
The gospel.
Right, right, right.
And ain't nobody listening to that.
A good Friday and Easter.
I need something big.
Amen?
Bigger than the resurrection.
Bigger than anything we've ever done.
National headlines.
Preach on the death and resurrection of Jesus.
An actual crucifixion.
Uh-oh.
By placing the nails through your palms in the right place, we hope to avoid major nerve damage.
Operation Stop, Skip as you go.
That's awesome.
You have to cancel this guilt right astronomy.
Don't be so dramatic, Chank.
I like the rusty ones.
What are you going to do?
I told him he's insane.
Been praying for you about that, though, Funkas.
It's gonna be beneficial for all parties involved.
We foster a yes environment here.
I have an answer for you.
What a great trailer.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, man, to part with the ball done.
Joey Fatone out of nowhere.
Yeah.
What a character.
All right, let's move on to some weird news.
This has been stuff that's good.
This news is weird.
California man's wallet lost in Antarctica returned after 53 years.
He lost his wallet.
It's back.
He lost it in 1967 as a Navy meteorologist.
Hmm.
And forgot about it until last week.
Yeah.
And then he got it back.
So, wow.
That's weird.
And he's 91.
Yeah.
He's 91 now.
So he would imagine if he had died and not gotten that wallet back.
Wow.
What a sad world and tragic.
So this is amazing.
It'd be the third tragedy of this week.
Inspiring.
Yeah.
When we were talking about this before, I thought it was a guy from California.
You missed the word wallet.
I missed the word wallet.
I thought a man was lost in an architecture for 50 years.
He escaped when he was 91.
I was like, he was going on about the story.
He's going on about the story.
This is a crazy story.
And I'm going, well, I mean, it's a wallet.
It's not that big of a deal.
Yeah.
All right.
I like this one.
Rapper Len Martin starts Gorilla Glue Challenge after thinking Tessica Brown's story about being unable to get Gorilla Glue out of her hair was a hoax.
He immediately gets a red solo cup stuck to his face.
So he thought, so then just for context, he tweeted this.
He tweets, I thought that chick with the gorilla glue was making that story up.
But no, it's real.
I don't know why I tried it.
Now they talk about cutting the tip off my lips and surgery.
Y'all pray for me.
And then the photo is excellent.
If you're not on the video, get on the video feed and look at it.
I'm looking to see this picture.
It's unbelievable.
He glued the red solo cup to his actual over his nose.
Over his nose, on his face.
Looks like a joke, but it's real.
He did this.
I like that.
When you guys first read this story, I thought he glued a gorilla to his face.
I misunderstood that story, too.
Glued a wallet, glued a wallet from Antarctica to his face.
He announced he's going to be releasing a solo album.
Oh, yeah.
Heyo.
Oh, hang on.
I have the perfect sound effect.
His new rapper name is going to be Cupface.
That wasn't as good as a joke.
A dog yell.
What is that?
A dog yawl.
Okay.
Okay.
That's perfect.
This could be a good alternative to masks, though.
All patrons required to wear a mask or glue a solo cup to their face.
Your turn, Wes.
You get to read the next one.
Oh, man.
Okay.
I love reading.
Just read each word in there.
Reading is fundamental.
This is the mysterious.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, okay.
This is a big story, guys.
I don't know why it was not bigger.
Mysterious trail of four-toed footprints discovered atop frosty car in England.
And boy, it is fascinating.
There's some weird little tiny footprints with four toes that walk across the back window of this car.
No, it's the windshield.
Back window.
Is it the windshield in the back?
You can see there's a window.
It's a British car, so it's backwards, whichever way it is.
Yeah.
Flipped horizontally.
I'm looking at this thinking somebody rubbed their side of their hand and then did the little finger toes and just ringed it.
That's what it looks like to me.
That's exactly what it is.
They're too round and perfect.
Debunked.
Debunked.
Snopes.
Let's get Snopes on the case here.
Debunked.
I love all the speculating about what it could be.
How could somebody be it's so cold out?
Why would they be walking on a car at this time of night?
Like you normally do in the warm weather.
Like if it was fire, yeah.
If it was warm out, I might understand.
Walking up a windshield.
I see a lot of stuff on the internet that's like obviously fake, like a staged video.
And then you go to the comments and there's like hundreds of people like, wow, this is amazing.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Maybe I'm just jaded, you know.
Yeah, you are.
Just a little world.
You're a Hollywood insider, so you kind of know that.
I see behind the scenes of how this trick's done.
Musician turns late uncle's skeleton into working guitar.
So, yeah, rib cage.
Just help us.
The movie Coco.
Did it?
No, I don't know.
I think what's important here is that this guy's in Florida.
So it feels like a Florida man story.
Very on brand.
And his name is Prince Midnight.
Wow.
Does it sound different?
Is that his birth name?
Does it tell uncle jokes?
It's a very avuncular guitar.
Exactly, that's right.
So apparently the bones have been used in a medical school in Greece for a while.
For decades.
Yeah, for decades.
So this is an old uncle.
Is there a word for old uncle?
Probably.
It's old avuncular.
Old avuncular stuff.
So he decided they didn't need it.
He's like, oh, I'll make it into a guitar or something.
It looks pretty cool.
Yeah, it does look pretty cool.
So he took like the pelvis, spine, and rib cage and made that the body of the guitar.
Why not the skull?
And then he fixed the.
Is he playing inside of the ribs?
Maybe the skull could be the head of the guitar.
It should be.
Yeah, it seems like the skull is the most metal thing.
All right.
Cool.
Fail.
Is it my turn?
It's your turn.
Ted Cruz is rocking a mullet now.
Is this true?
I see this photo all over the internet.
It's true.
It's a real photo.
Does anybody know the story of why he's doing that?
I don't know.
We could ask him.
You want to ask?
I like how his mullet is, you know, they say a mullet is a party in front of, or no, business in front party in the back.
His is very much like, you know, if you go to a Republican party, it's like still very reservoir.
He's wearing suits.
Business in the front, Republican party.
Exactly.
GOP in the back.
G-O-P in the back.
That's great.
Am I going?
Sure.
Okay.
I mean, first of all, I want to say, I think that that's fake.
There's literally Photoshop.
Why would you photo?
There's only one picture.
I need to see more pictures.
We do need more.
Okay.
All right.
He's not wearing a mask.
That's what makes it faster.
That's how you know it's fake.
It's okay.
Here's the headline.
It's freezing cold in Texas.
The weather channel tweeted on January 21st that February would be unseasonably warm.
Unseasonably.
Yeah.
So they failed.
Wrong a little bit.
They were wrong.
They were off by about 50 degrees, I think.
For people that are listening to this later on when they don't know what's going on right now, it's like the whole United States is frozen except for Florida.
Exactly.
And California.
And California.
Yeah.
But it's cold here.
I'm cold right now.
It's like in the mid-60s.
It's cold for us.
Well, right now.
But like at night, I have to wear like a bunch of layers.
It hits the 40s.
Yeah, I get really cold at night.
My man cave has no, it's open windows and everything for the cigar smoke and very thin walls.
That's kind of on you, though.
That's on me.
I choose to go out there, but you've chosen your lifestyle.
I have.
I made my bed now.
I still truck it.
That's a tick quote.
Is it my turn?
Yeah.
I was going to be a mashed potato.
Florida boy recounts garbage truck horror.
So Wes found this when a child climbed into a garbage truck.
Yeah, I didn't put enough information in here for you to read, but he...
He's new.
It's a hobo.
This is his first and last day working for the money.
I just put the quote in that I love, but this, this, I guess I would say dumb kid crawled into the garbage truck because he loved garbage trucks.
He was seven.
Maybe they don't know it smashes it.
I don't think he knew that part.
And this truck had like blades that crushed up and shredded the thing.
And then the truck driver heard some kid crying and he just started scrambling to run back to, he was in the front of the truck and he scrambled and ran around the back to turn off the blades and he turned them off like the second before this kid got pulled in.
He actually got cut.
The kid got cut and the kid says, quote, I don't like trash cans anymore.
And then he says, unless it's like a tiny trash can that's inside the house, then it might be fine.
So obsession with trash is not over.
Yeah, I used to talk about Calvin's obsession with garbage trucks.
He'd get up.
If you only heard the noise, you'd run out and watch it like it was a passing branchaurus or something.
Like that scene from Jurassic Park when they all look up and see the dinosaurs for the first time.
That was every Monday morning, Tuesday morning.
It's awesome.
At our house.
But he never got in.
He never got in.
That's because we put a lock on the gate.
He probably would have.
Excellent.
Sounds like something you would absolutely do.
You can never watch Toy Story 3 again.
Is it my turn?
I think it is.
Actor Sean Penn suggests the Pope should impeach evangelical Christian leaders.
This doesn't quite sell it.
You've got to read.
He's got to read his tweet.
You have to read Sean Penn's tweet.
Yeah, the tweet.
I just clicked on Tean.
We moved the tweet to the wrong part of the article on here right here.
Sean Penn.
Evangelical leaders should themselves be impeached by the Vatican if they themselves don't follow Nikki Haley's lead and clearly state they should not have followed Satin into the bowels of hell.
But perhaps they're too busy at sex parties.
Was he tired when he wrote this?
So much to unpack here, like the impeaching of evangelicals by the fatty.
Well, and apparently hell is filled with satin.
Satin, which sounds like a dad.
You have to follow Satin into hell.
That's amazing.
I don't understand.
Don't follow Nikki.
Okay, so Nikki Haley must have said something.
She said we shouldn't have followed Trump.
Something along those.
She says, unless you stand up like Nikki Haley and say, I say no to Satin.
Not today, Satin.
Get thee behind me.
Thee behind me, Satin, then you should be impeached.
Impeached by the Vatican.
Impeached by the Vatican.
What's the talk about for that?
They're talking about it reminds us of how Hollywood writes Christians, like they just mix up all these things.
They just have vaguely heard Christian church words, you know?
Right.
It made me think of the priest of the Calvary Chapel or something.
Exactly right.
Made me think of the movie Saved where it's supposed to be this evangelical thing.
And there's just all this Catholicism mixed in.
Yeah, and they don't really know.
They clearly have never been within 100 feet of a church in their lives.
And yeah.
Yeah, that's great.
So these leaders are like, well, we would have stood up like Nikki Haley, but I got the sex party to go to.
It starts really, don't really have the time.
I think the Vatican's busy.
I don't think they'll.
I think they'll overlook this one.
Can they impeach even their own people?
Is impeaching a thing that Vaticans do?
No.
Vaticans.
Vaticans.
Now you're doing the Hollywood.
I'm trying to play Sean Penn.
Sure, sure, sure.
Vaticanese.
You're from Vatican.
Vaticanites.
Vaticanite?
Catholics?
I liked Ali Beth Stuckey's response.
I don't know if anyone's giving you a clear explanation of what you got wrong here, but the Pope is Catholic and evangelicals are not, so he has no authority over what they do.
That's one.
Two, they can't be impeached.
And three, it's velvet.
Velvet is in hell.
Not satin.
Is velvet really in hell?
I don't know.
I don't get it.
She just not like velvet.
I think she was making a play on the word satin.
I was trying to figure out there's a scripture somewhere about the velvet of hell or something.
The velvety.
I don't think that exists.
It's supposed to be a joke.
But she's a woman.
Yeah, you know, they struggle sometimes.
Who wants to get the bear one?
Oh, Kyle, you should read this one.
No.
No.
This one's for you, Kyle.
No!
20-foot-two-inch bear made from roses breaks Guinness World Record.
Oh, I love Guinness.
Decoration at a wedding vow renewal ceremony for 108 couples in China.
Broke Guinness World Record for the world's largest rose bear.
Wait, a ceremony for 108 couples?
Oh, renewal.
So they weren't all getting married on the same day.
It wasn't like the Moonies.
Yeah, it wasn't the Moonies.
So is there a lot of competition for giant rose bears?
Is this a common thing?
Yeah, how many are there out there?
And what are the rest of the day?
This might be the only one.
I mean, so this is a pretty dubious specific.
I have a rose bear that's a little bit smaller than this.
It's the old record.
It's 20 foot, not 20 foot 2.
Exactly.
I have a massive hyacinth bear.
Oh, that might you might have a flower.
Is that a flower?
Sure.
Sounds like one.
Sure.
Why not?
All right, well, that's it for weird news.
That's the weird news.
That was some weird news, guys.
That was weird.
So, Wikipedia.
More like Wokipedia, am I right?
Oh, man.
Oh, damn.
How did you do that?
You're fast.
I think I have a thing just for that.
No.
No.
Okay.
So, Wikipedia, you can go in and you can look at the editors having discussions behind the scenes about what edits they're going to make to your page and any entry on the page.
And so we found, our CEO, Seth Dylan, found on our page, our Babylon B Wikipedia entry, people discussing whether or not we should be defined as satire because they don't like our jokes.
And it's fantastic.
So we're going to do a dramatic reading of conversation between these Wikipedia editors.
So here we go.
Isn't satire.
Wait, hold on.
Here's the headline.
Or the topic, whatever.
Can this legally be considered satire?
Isn't satire supposed to be humorous in some way?
Or at the very least have some sort of coherent comedic structure to it?
I've read many B articles, and they largely seem constitutionally unable to craft anything even resembling a joke or satirical barb.
Open to others' thoughts on this.
Yeah.
This feels like an open market.
I'm sure you're open to that for sure.
Wikipedia reflects what is published in reliable sources, and those sources generally describe the B as a satire site.
You can be the next guy.
I agreed with Guerrilla Warfare.
Which is his name, username.
That's the previous guy.
Kyle plays Guerrilla Warfare.
No, that's you.
You're Gorilla.
I'm Guerrilla Warfare.
You're this guy.
I'm anonymous.
This is an author.
Yeah, a bunch of numbers.
I see.
This is about what reputable sources say, not an individual editor's sense of humor.
Squatch 347.
Squatch.
You know, it's most unfortunate, though, because in reality, the Babylon Bee is no different from any other right-wing disinfo site.
Fox, OAN, Newsweek.
Bounding into comics, you name it.
They're all the same.
Everyone is bounding into comics.
Yeah, sure.
The Bees simply found a way to protect themselves from liability by adding L-O-L-J-K at the end of every article, which is perfectly in line with the usual tactics of the Trump era.
Every time they are caught lying, they simply say it was just a joke the whole time.
But as long as they avoid being fact-checked, Republicans eat this nonsense up like it was candy.
I'm pretty sure Snopes did release an article defending their decision to fact-check the B.
They even had statistics showing that over 40% of Republicans can't tell the difference between Babylon Bee satire and actual news stories.
To call the site satire is like calling the anti-abortion movement pro-life.
Wait a minute.
But aren't they called pro-life?
So they are called pro-life.
You're good.
You should be fine then.
So we, according to this guy.
It's just a comedic choice that we make to add LOLJK at the end of every article.
Yeah.
That's what makes it funny.
It's funny.
AOC is an idiot.
Yeah.
Otherwise, how would people go?
It was a joke.
There's no way to communicate that without adding the LOL JK.
And that study.
Remember that study?
40% of Republicans can't tell the difference.
And the way they ran this study was they took our headlines.
They reworded them to make it sound like a real news story.
Because, you know, there's a format to the headline where the joke reveals itself.
They completely take that out and then had people just, they read that and said, do you think that's a joke or not?
Yeah.
So it's like our Carmen passes away after lifelong addiction to Jesus.
Yeah.
It's like if they took that and they said, did Carmen die after struggling with an addiction to Jesus for 30 years?
Oh, even if they probably take out Jesus, they did die.
Did Carmen die of an addiction?
After an addiction?
Yeah.
And the people would be like, yeah, that sounds real.
If he said it, then it's on the internet.
That's what happened.
Sure.
Why are you asking me this?
Something's a lot, Wikipedia editors.
We're setting up.
Yeah, I'm glad you guys are working hard on keeping Wikipedia reputable and trustworthy.
And making sure people are safe from jokes.
Safe from jokes.
Maybe I'm totally an ignorant person.
Just hold your comment on that.
But there's a comment section in Wikipedia where people can.
It's like they call it the talk page.
It's behind the article.
So you can say, hey, this doesn't sound quite right.
And then editors will come along and reply.
I see.
I've never bothered to look at any of that.
Yeah.
You can do it on any page.
I think it's like a talk tab or something.
You click on it.
You can look at what people are.
It's kind of interesting.
Sure.
Yeah.
But it's kind of scary when you look at it that way because they're clearly trying to get us labeled in this pigeonhole of disinfo.
Right.
I think the gist of this is you can't make jokes if you're a conservative.
That's the idea.
Yeah, I think that's probably where it's going to.
Which it's probably true, right?
Well, we have our pronoun joke, and then we have our like identifies joke.
Yeah, those are the two jokes.
That's all we got so far.
I like we didn't get to the end here.
This guy who's a Wikipedia article editor, one of the last things he says about that Snope study.
I don't remember the specifics, and I'm not very good at looking this stuff up.
Snope's not counted as a secondary source.
So you're editing Wikipedia pages, and you're not very good at looking stuff up.
That makes so much sense.
Now, to be fair, that's this random anonymous internet user who came along starting to suggest this stuff.
Right.
So this doesn't seem like someone who regularly edits Wikipedia.
This is someone who's come along and said, you just read looking up the Babylon Bee.
Babylon B is described as humor.
I won't stand for it.
Right.
So this isn't actually Wikipedia.
It's people.
It's people.
Right.
It's some dumb dummy.
It's some dummy.
Which is all of Wikipedia, really.
It's a lot of dummies.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's good people on Wikipedia.
I'm sure.
Okay.
Sure.
Sure.
All right.
You ready?
Topic.
Topic of the week.
And now, the Babylon Bee's topic of the week.
All right.
So last week was a little crazy for us here at the Babylon Bee.
Wednesday, the place was all abuzz because E-puns.
Gina Carano was set to come in and interview in person the next day, Thursday.
We had a skit that we had written, and we were hoping to get her on a little cameo on there.
It was a crazy day, right?
Yep.
So then we all, it's like late in the day, we're like, oh, it's going to be crazy.
And then we're all getting dinner.
Patrick's quickly editing this video so that it's ready so that we just need to add the one scene with her at the end.
And then we see Twitter pops up.
Gina Carano has been fired.
You seem too traumatized to talk about it.
It was like a roller coaster.
It was a roller coaster.
It was insane.
And she had actually tweeted the day before she was supposed to come on our podcast.
Yeah, her last tweet after you got canceled.
Heading over to the Babylon Bee podcast.
Yeah.
Tagged us in it.
So we were getting asked by these news outlets and stuff.
Like, did you get it?
Because she's like the top trending topic on Twitter, and everybody who goes to her page sees on the Babylon Bee podcast.
So we had to settle for Wes is what we're talking about.
Yeah, so we're on Wes instead.
I think you guys made the right choice, though, to cancel her and say, like, we don't want to interview someone that toxic and that.
Yeah.
Someone who would dare to say that we don't want to turn our neighbors over to Nazis.
Yeah.
We don't want to become Nazis.
Yeah, that's pretty.
And the pronouns being beep, bop, boop, or whatever that is.
That's the worst.
Yeah.
We can't associate.
Well, the crazy thing is she did tell us, like, she messaged us that she was still doing it.
So we're like, she's still doing it.
So the roller coaster's like, up, down, and still doing it.
And then she couldn't do it, which is totally understandable.
The moment she said she's still doing it in the back of mind, I'm like, that's like a 50% chance.
Yeah, sure.
Because it's like a storm.
Like, I've been minorly attacked on Twitter where, like, you know, my phone's just going off all day because they've decided I'm bad.
And, you know, it's probably a teeny tiny version of whatever she's going through, but people are contacting you.
All of some people that, you know, Twitter follows the people that you know from Hollywood, suddenly like, what, you're bad?
And they get there.
I'm following you and stuff's happening.
And the pressure, she's probably getting all this pressure to release a statement renouncing her faith or whatever.
Drink the blood of a goat.
Whatever they make you do in Hollywood.
Something like that.
Something like that.
Confirm or deny?
The goat drinking, the goat blood drinking.
There's a little bit of goat.
A little bit of a blood drinking.
Kind of like the Masons.
We talked about that with Kellener Skin.
Yeah.
Oh, did they drink?
Drink blood and deny Jesus or something.
I don't know.
That's a rumor.
That's just a rumor.
So, yeah.
But then cool.
Probably turned out for the best because if she had come in before she got fired, we would have this interview with her where she's still on Star Wars.
Yeah, that would have been weird.
And then if she had come in the day after, she would have been all depressed.
Yeah, or she would have said, been angry and said a lot of things.
Maybe she did.
Right.
Or we'd be like, so what's it like being on Star Wars?
And she'd be like, these are jerks.
And the great news was that day she got a film deal with Daily Wire.
Yeah.
So which I think is exciting.
I do think it's exciting too.
Because I love that answer back that like, okay, fine.
Canceler, we'll make a movie with her.
They used to feel like not an option.
Things are changing.
And that's kind of what we want to talk about here.
Wes is in the film industry.
He makes movies and stuff.
We make entertainment.
We're trying to get some movies made.
And there's this shift.
We talked about Dallas Sonier did that interview with Ben Shapiro and he's that producer who's going to produce movie with Gina Crano, they announced.
And making the shift where it's like, and it's not, I think the one thing that excites me about people that are more conservative making movies is we don't feel like we have to make ideological movies.
And in fact, I would love it if we didn't feel like we had to.
It feels like it's weird right now because it feels like the left owns this space where it's like, we just make movies.
And then if you're a conservative, it's like, then it just has to be labeled Christian or a conservative movie.
I'd love to shift things over so that, because it really is true.
I mean, the more honest thing that's going on is the left makes leftist movies.
Right.
But it doesn't get labeled that way.
I would love to be able to evolve into this place where conservatives can be conservatives, whether or not they're making conservative or Christian movie.
They're just making good entertainment.
And I feel like we want to get to that place where movies don't have to be pushing some ideology of some kind that's approved.
I feel like you just have to say things that are true.
Like you have to make movies about things that are true.
And I feel like any movie, I mean, honestly, I feel like a lot of the problem with Christian movies in the past has been that the ideology and the message trumped saying things that are true.
And so people have these conversions in the films that are not the way people actually come to Jesus.
And people that are against Christianity say things that people that are against Christianity don't actually say or they're angrier or they don't act like humans.
And so, but, you know, Christians sort of mock Christian movies because of that.
But like you're saying, every little subculture has their movies where their agenda is so strong.
There's so many movies that come out that are the message about environmental causes is so strong that it's just detached from reality and it's unwatchable.
Or there's like LGBT movies that the agenda is so strong that people that hate LGBT people don't, in the movie, don't act like real humans and don't have real human interaction.
And so I hope that like the Daily Wire and people that are sort of in that conservative space, I hope we can like make movies where we just say things that are true.
And like that message will emerge.
You don't have to hammer it in.
You don't have to force it in.
So I hope we can get there.
I think we're going that direction for sure.
There really seems to be some kind of shaking up that's going on.
Yeah.
I mean, indie films are on the rise and it's just, it's shifted to where because of streaming, independent films, a lot of Hollywood has moved out to Georgia.
You know, it's just a between COVID wrecking theaters and streaming, changing the landscape.
I mean, smaller niche films do way better now than they used to.
Right.
And big budget films, because of the model that they're set on, is that you have to get all these butts in theater seats in these expensive theaters, which are going up in price.
And now they're becoming premium where it's like you get a steak and need a movie, you know, watch a movie, sit there and drink wine or whatever.
Right.
You know, they have to be movies that will absolutely make billions of dollars.
Otherwise, it has to be Marvel and has to be remakes.
And they're not taking risks anymore.
No, that's true.
And also streaming, but there's like eight gazillion streaming channels and they're all desperate for content.
So there's definitely like a huge market there, especially after this year of COVID, nothing's getting made.
So everyone is home watching everything that's available and we're out.
We're out of stuff.
And all it will take is a few great movies made by conservatives to shift things massively.
Because I think there's a lot of people I think in Hollywood that they go, you know, yeah, my movie's not like environmentalist trope.
It's just a great movie.
True story.
It's true to what I think is true.
Or it's a great action movie or whatever.
Or you'll make it.
I guess it doesn't help my career to like hate Republicans now.
Conservatives would have some message.
Just to have that shift of like, oh, wait, great movies can be made over here that are successful with financial successes is like, that's going to take a lot of power away from Hollywood.
Yeah, I think so.
Have you guys heard of that movie, Church People?
It's coming out.
I think it kind of fits into that space really well.
Never heard of it.
Oh, it's going to be huge.
Oh, it's going to be huge.
Tens of people will see it.
Dozens.
Dozens of us.
I think that there's been this narrative that we've kind of bought into that conservatives are really bad at entertainment.
Conservatives are bad at comedy.
I mean, that's something we hear all the time, obviously.
Right.
For good reason.
I mean, we run the Babylon beat.
See?
But LOL JK.
But the weird thing is, I think one of the factors is that conservative entertainment is often explicitly labeled.
Like this is a conservative movie, you know, conservative movie or whatever.
And so when you see a bad conservative movie, you go, wow, conservatives are terrible at this.
Right.
But you see a bad movie like Frozen 2, you know, and you're like, that's not seen as a bad liberal movie.
Right.
It's very on the nose, very preachy.
You know, it's in your face.
Right.
But that's not that failure.
I mean, I say failure makes billions of dollars.
Right.
You know, but that kind of artistic failure, in my view, you know, isn't isn't really labeled, isn't really pinned on liberals.
It's just seen as, you know, whatever.
Right.
I think the margin for error is much smaller for conservatives, for sure.
Part of it is that the slice of the pie has been, I wouldn't even say conservatives.
I'd say like the Christian market.
There's been a lot of pressure from the Christian market to say like, well, that doesn't check the boxes for what a Christian movie is.
There's not a massive conversion of the rainfalls.
Yeah, exactly.
They don't go to the church for the first time in 50 years and repent.
And so some of that's come from Christians, but also, honestly, I've been on the side where the major studios have been saying like, well, we'll distribute your Christian film, but it has to check these boxes because we know that's what Christians want.
And they're the ones sort of forcing.
Oh, yeah.
You know, it's a problem.
Hollywood isn't completely, you know, Christian culture is definitely guilty in this arena just as much for sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I think we've grown beyond that quite a bit.
I think that's kind of become a thing of the past.
And I mean, that's the thing.
Every Christian I know watches most, you know, most of them have seen Breaking Bad or they've seen all these shows.
And it's like, why do we compartmentalize in that way and like let Hollywood make all these great stories?
And then we always have to tell the same story.
I think people are kind of waking up to that doesn't have to be the case.
Yeah.
When you ask, I've actually met with investors about making films that are sort of, you know, from a good moral standpoint, but not necessarily Christian films.
And then they'll kind of say like, well, we want to invest in Christian films.
And then you ask them what their favorite movies are and they'll say, up.
And, you know, all of the Pixar movies.
And none of them are Christian films.
And they're all movies that have good family values and support good things and are about forgiveness and redemption.
But then, well, but we're going to make a Christian film.
Yeah.
Just make a good film that has all of those things that you want in it, you know?
Yeah.
Tell good stories.
Yeah.
I think that I'm kind of getting back to something we were talking about earlier, but the you know, I think that there's a certain value that conservatives have, or at least a worldview where for us, we go, the truth about the world is, and it's our faith is that.
Right.
Our politics are a separate thing where it's more of a hypothetical, like we think this might work.
I think for people on the left, the truth about the world and the politics are one thing.
So they have a much harder time labeling things as political because to them there's no distinction.
And so that creates its own weird issue where they feel like anything that isn't following that political line is a lie.
Right.
Right.
And then also that they're, for us, the truth about the world is eternal and it's beyond this world.
There's God.
There's angels.
There's demons.
There's things beyond this world.
For them, it's all right here in this world.
So all their gods, their angels, their demons are right here.
And so they have a much harder time allowing their demons, who are real people to also make movies.
No, I think you're absolutely.
There's just this divide that like, I don't know how you, the only way to overcome it is to make successful movies, I think.
So that, you know, because money is powerful.
Right.
If the movie does well, people are going to come over there and make their movies there.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think you're right.
I think it'll happen too, though, that Christians and or conservatives, I don't want to say those are the same thing, but they are.
But just be real here.
LOL, Jicky.
But I think it'll happen where a movie will have sort of a more conservative worldview and it'll do well.
And then people on the left will go like, oh, it's propaganda.
They're sneaking it in.
It's the Trojan horse.
They're trying to get your message in there.
Yeah, that was really bizarre of Hillbilly Elegy.
Right.
And it's like, it's a well-done good movie.
Right.
Well, the book is incredible.
I didn't read it.
It's really good.
But just the criticism that like it's white, poor white people don't need their story told.
Just weird.
Why?
Right.
Anyway.
No, the criticism on the book was the same, which is funny because he kind of talks about that a little bit.
You know, there are people that are, life is really hard and they don't have anything and they're struggling.
And then when they talk about it, people will say, well, try being black and being in that situation.
And they're like, oh, okay.
I'm not, I guess.
I don't know.
It's not like they're not mutually exclusive.
Right, exactly.
Right.
It's just like we have to have this narrative that white people are all this, all this privilege and we can't talk outside.
That's once again, just how, can we just talk about what is true?
Right, exactly.
Right.
And that's the weird thing for me.
I mean, I just, I grew up in a very poor white area in Oregon.
Yeah.
And so all of the tropes about white people and everything, like, they don't apply to where I grew up.
Same with me.
Again, like my dad worked in a factory and my mom cleaned houses for a living.
And so a lot of the probably nice houses, to be fair.
Yeah.
She cleaned really nice houses.
Yeah.
It's quite privileged.
So a lot of that doesn't resonate.
I don't understand.
It doesn't take away from the experience of other people of other races.
Right.
Why can't those people have some to me?
Stories are about that's and that's what I hate about all the like forced diversity in stories is that most great stories are from these little pockets of subcultures.
Yeah, right.
If you have to involve and get every single culture into one story, it makes it this bland sort of truth.
It looks like a stock photo where everybody's around the table shaking hands and they're all different races.
It's a Bennett and ass.
It's just not reality.
And it's not that it's racist.
These people, it's not racist because most of your friends are from your same subculture.
Right.
But that's where great stories happen.
Yeah, I think that's true.
I think a lot about in when see how I'm going to get this all messed up.
In the Bible, there was the guy who was Jesus healed him.
Jesus healed him of blindness and they said, go to the temple and the spit mud guy.
Yeah, yeah.
And so he goes and they're all freaking out and yelling at him and like, what happened?
What are you doing?
What was it from God or was it from the devil?
And his answer was, all I know is I used to be blind and now I'm not.
And I love that that like we should just tell stories where we just give the facts.
Like here are the facts.
I used to be blind and now I'm not.
Yeah.
And you guys can argue about it and wrestle and figure it out.
But all I know is I was blind and Jesus healed me and here I am.
That's all we have to do.
And that's what we do with our own life stories.
Our life stories don't tell us what to believe.
We go through an experience and at the end we draw our own beliefs from it.
Right.
And often with those beliefs we go, maybe, you know, we're trying to figure it out.
Makes sense to me.
That's a good story.
It should be like it gives you a series of events that draw you to think to ask a question.
Right.
But when it beats you over the head with what you need to believe based on that story, then that's propaganda.
Propaganda.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We need to write the conservative version of Fern Goli where the heroes go and destroy the forest.
Yeah.
Maybe.
Okay.
I'm just throwing that out there.
Let me let me write that down.
Yeah.
This isn't for you.
But they create a whole bunch of jobs.
Yeah.
But a lot of it's out of it.
They're just crushing the fairies and stomping on them.
Oh man.
I would love that.
But they plant a bunch more trees in the end because sustainability profitability.
I mean, profitability.
Yeah.
Thank you, capitalism.
All right.
Well, glorious prophet.
Maybe we can talk a little bit more on this in the subscriber portion if we get some time.
Let's move on to hate mail, yeah.
Oh, sounds good.
I really miss Adam Ford.
All right, we got a hate mail from a fan named Denise.
And Wes is going to read it for us in a dramatic voice.
You do it in your Minnesota accent or something.
I am so saddened to see your post, see you post mistruths and have a misleading agenda.
Oh, for what?
Question mark, Certainly not to promote our Heavenly Father.
When you lay your head down at night, think about what you stand for.
That was the perfect voice.
Did you pre-read this at all?
I mean, I don't even know how to read.
Oh, whoa, it's a miracle.
Wow.
That was beautiful.
I do feel bad this lady thinks that we're that bad.
You sound like a sweet lady.
When you lay your head down, young man.
You think about what you've done.
I just feel like there's something there where you're laying down but thinking about standing.
I don't know.
I can't get a good joke out of it.
Well, you should be how do you sleep at night or something, right?
Yeah.
Well, this is a more LGBTI.
That was draft one.
Yeah.
That's good.
She didn't do a rewrite on that one.
Do you guys email people back when they send things like this?
Once in a while, our CEO will answer.
We'll just blast back and then they'll blast and then we'll get like a thread of like 20 messages and it's great.
Yeah.
It is great.
Did we ever read?
I thought we had one that we read back and forth.
I think so.
I can't remember.
But I think there's a new one where he was going like nu-uh.
And they're like, uh-huh.
We got to read that one.
Maybe you had like 50 employees or something.
Dan, make a note.
Make a note, Dan.
We got to find that email because it was hilarious.
All right.
Do you know what she got upset about?
No, I don't know.
She never tell us what the story was.
Because we posted Mistrut.
There's always people thinking that we're trying to mislead people.
Yep.
She didn't read all the way to the end where it said L-O-L-J-K.
She just did things.
Okay, though.
She thought it was OAN or comics on.
What was that?
Bounding into Comics.
Bounding into Comics.
That's it.
She probably reads that a lot.
No idea.
No idea.
Nazi comic, I assume.
Sure.
Thanks for joining us, everybody.
We're going to move into the subscriber portion where we're going to watch some Carmen videos and jam out to them.
Yeah.
Maybe talk some more about Christian art and conservative art.
And we have a voicemail from a subscriber, and we've got a bonus hate mail for you.
And plus, we're going to read some subscriber-submitted headlines.
And Wes will tell some crazy stories.
Wes is going to tell us behind-the-scenes stories, all the dirt on Carmen.
And the Baldwins.
May he rest up.
Joey Fatone.
Yeah.
I got dirt.
Oh.
All right.
We got dirt.
And Kirk Cameron?
Okay.
Just make something up.
I'll make something up.
All right.
We'll see you guys.
Coming up next for Babylon B subscribers.
Yeah.
I thought you were a Christian-based news source, but I see you backing AOC in her lies.
I'm always embarrassed to order his coffee order because it's a tall glass of coffee red eye, which is like coffee with espresso in it.
And then 10 pumps of mint.
No creams, no sugar.
Calvinist Arminian.
Oh, gosh.
Wondering what they'll say next?
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Kyle and Ethan would like to thank Seth Dillon for paying the bills, Adam Ford for creating their job, the other writers for tirelessly pitching headlines, the subscribers, and you, the listener.