Episode 20: Trump - Liar, Lunatic, Or Lord? With Ben Howe
In the twentieth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle interview Ben Howe about being a dirty #NeverTrumper, and convince him to render unto Trump. Ben is an author, columnist, podcaster, television writer, filmmaker and award-winning political ad producer. His new book is Immoral Majority: Why Evangelicals Chose Political Power Over Christian Values. He can be heard weekly on his podcast The Fifth Estate. Ben Howe is on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook Get Ethan's new children's novel, Brave Ollie Possum. Order directly from the publisher or on Amazon. Stories Of The Week Story 1 - Keith And Kristyn Getty Struggling To Come Up With Word That Rhymes With 'Substitutionary Atonement' They actually made one. Story 2 - RNC Raising Money To Help Democrats Televise Five Debates A Week Story 3 - Satan Endorses Paula White's New Book Interview: Ben Howe (part 1) Hate Mail Paid-subscriber portion: Ben Howe (part 2) Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans
In a world of fake news, this is news you can trust.
You're listening to the Babylon B. Here are your infallible hosts, Kyle Mann and Ethan Nicole.
Their pronouns are the, thou, and thine.
How are thou, Kyle?
I'm great.
I'm here with my friend Garth.
How dare you?
My name is Wayne.
What does that mean?
And welcome to Wayne's World.
Are you referring to that our method of podcasting is the Wayne and Garth method?
I guess that's probably kind of true.
And this is the earliest homeschool notification we've given in a podcast.
But for our homeschoolers, Wayne's World was a highly secular movie.
Wasn't it based on a Saturday Night Live sketch that they did recently?
I believe.
It's always a quality movie when you take a two-minute Saturday Night Live sketch and stretch it out.
They do that a lot.
Coneheads was that?
Blues Brothers was that too, I think.
Was it?
Yeah.
I didn't know that.
Learn some every day.
All right, Garth.
Well, what do we have today?
Well, today.
On this podcast.
I want to do some self-promotion real quick because it's been a big week for me.
I made a book.
Have I mentioned this book on the podcast yet?
I think we might have talked about it.
It's called Brave Ollie Possum.
Yeah, this is a children's book that I spent a long time writing.
So this book, I read my kids' bedtime stories every night, reading them all the classics, and I got really into it.
And I started realizing what I really liked and what I didn't like in bedtime stories.
And I got super inspired, especially after reading Roll Dahl, like BFG, Charlie the Chakra Factory, and Matilda, books like that, to write my own story.
So this book I spent a couple years really writing like over and over again.
There's over 200 illustrations in it, and it's finally coming out.
It's hardbound.
It's about 370 pages.
It's glorious.
I'm really proud of it.
And if you have kids or if you like fantastical stories, well, you read it, Kyle.
What did you think of it?
I will hawk your wares for you.
Yeah.
Give me a really long review.
I was really, I was, I almost said blessed.
I was blessed by it.
Thank you.
I got on a plane and it was a, I don't remember, four-hour flight or something.
Nothing better to do.
Nothing better to do because, you know, I'm not going to pay the 10 bucks for the Wi-Fi.
Yeah.
So if you're on a plane and you have nothing better to do, read Bollypost.
That was great.
I mean, there is, I'm not going to give any spoilers, but there is an amazing, epic scene that you can see coming if you know Ethan and you look at some clues in the context.
Did you see it coming when it came?
I didn't see that specific outcome.
The only thing I'm really proud of is there's some big surprises in the book, and I haven't had, I don't think I've had anybody call them before they come out.
Yeah, well, you give that aside in the beginning, like someone just says something in an offhanded way, and I'm like, oh, that's coming back in some way later on.
And I like, know you, and I just know people listening have no idea what we're talking about.
Okay, well, anyway, there's an epic finale that just makes the whole thing worth it, and it's wonderful.
So sweet.
It's a great book.
Okay, well, that's for pre-order on Amazon.
But by the time this podcast comes out, it'll be very close to being available.
It comes out October 27th.
And yeah, I can get it on Amazon or you can go to Canon Cannonball Books or Canon Books.
I'll put the link in the show notes if you want to give it an order.
All right.
Cool.
Well, this week we're going to be talking to Ben Howe.
How?
How will we talk to Ben Howe?
He's going to come in here and talk to us.
Yeah.
That's how.
And he wrote a book called The Immoral Majority, which is about how he doesn't like Trump.
I don't know.
Well, that's the best way to put that.
That's a really, really rich description.
It's really rich description.
It's compelling and rich.
Shocking story of evangelical Christendom embracing Trump.
So we'll look into that more later, but we're going to talk to Ben Howe.
Yeah, it sounded broader than that to me.
It sounded more.
Yeah, we talked about a lot of stuff now.
We actually talked about a lot of really stupid stuff.
Did we?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Last week, we actually talked about last week, and Mind is a whirlwind.
I can't even remember what we talked about.
It's yeah, Kyle's early in the week, and all I can think about is what stories are you posting today?
That's all I'm thinking about right now.
But right now, we're going to go and we're going to do our every week.
There are stories, these are some of them.
Keith and Kristen Getty struggling to come up with a word that rhymes with substitutionary atonement.
I know I post this article.
Yeah.
And I think this was this might have been the day we interviewed Ben Howe last week.
Oh, was it the day of?
Because every time we do a podcast, I'm like trying to write articles.
And then, like, okay, you know, it takes a couple hours or whatever.
I'm like, oh, shoot, you know, I need to go publish something.
So I'm sitting there and I'm like, man, yeah, you're always twitching during podcasts.
Yeah.
I'm like, I got to give Keith and Christian Getty some love.
So I published this article.
Nobody got it.
Nobody understood it.
Ethan's like, who?
Yeah.
So, but the cool part was that Keith and Kristen Getty actually took note of this article.
And they actually wrote, they wrote and recorded like a minute-long clip of this song where they tried to come up with rhymes.
And then they did come up with rhymes for substitutionary atonement.
So I was so dumb when you played this or when I saw this video, I thought they were just singing just a normal hymn.
Yeah.
I didn't realize that there was a joke in the lyrics.
Yeah.
We'll just play a little audio from that.
Listen to this.
Kyle, imagine Kyle watching this, like squeezing his little hands together.
Like, oops, I pushed the wrong button.
Dang it, Ethan.
Terrible at this.
Scars.
Go.
Right, I think I've got the lyric settled.
Not so sure, but we can have it.
So Irish.
Yeah.
The lyrics.
I'm just seeing the fish in the sea and the wind in my head in the ocean.
I will free beyond this fighting world.
I only hope my only confidence.
There is no right or melody to fully pass.
Substitution, and we adore them.
The one rhymes, Substitution, and we adore them.
We repeat, and we adore them, Substitution, and we adore them.
Sounds better in headphones.
It's good.
It's very Irish.
It is.
Celtic.
Thank you, B, man.
You're welcome.
So I was.
I think that day, you know, I was having trouble coming up with articles.
And, you know, it was like, again, the podcast days are always weird for me.
And this goes out, and I was like, oh, you know, nobody shared this article.
Sad.
Who's the Gettys?
I don't know.
That's right.
You know, it's Christian humor.
We have to know who these people are.
I actually wished I had known because I do appreciate they're trying to make modern hymns, right?
They're trying to write songs.
And you've heard their songs.
It's just nobody, you know, what are some of their biggest hits?
In Christ Alone.
In Christ alone.
Yeah, one.
Yeah.
That was like a lunar active voice.
Not.
Did you sing?
Did you sing like backup on that?
No, I sang lead.
Were you the lead singer?
That's me.
That's me singing.
And I heard your voice, but I couldn't tell because you guys have all those layers.
Most of the layers are me too, but it's like a choir of me singing in your ear in your face.
But we're not talking about me.
Yeah, so anyway, so the next day, I'm like, I was at home.
I'm like, oh, you know, I tell my wife, didn't get many shares today.
And then all of a sudden, this pops up on my mentions.
And I'm like, oh my gosh.
I'm like, Keith and Chris Nagetti recorded a hymn based on a Babylon B article.
So now Babylon B is like actually affecting Christian culture.
So yeah, it was great.
Next Sunday we'll be singing this song.
My pastor texted me after that and he's like, we're going to sing this song on Sunday.
So anyway, these guys like they write the, they write these hymns that have like very specific theological implications.
Like they're very careful about their theology and stuff.
And so that was the joke, right?
Like substitutionary atonement.
Like, okay, they're going to rhyme.
And so what I love about this hymn that they record is like them actually just saying substitutionary atonement.
Like in the see, I felt like if you're really going to rhyme it, you need to have a word like that rhymes of the whole thing.
Like fiduciitinary alonement or something.
Fiduciary.
I don't know what I didn't have a plan to rhyme.
Some people in the comments on our post came up with some good ones that actually rhymed.
But yeah, I think you've got to rhyme every bit, right?
Because I think they cheated a little bit.
Like they said predicament.
They just, yeah, the answer to our predicament.
Atonement.
But even is fine.
A moment.
They run moment and alone.
Which is how it, which is how a normal rhyme would be in a song.
Yeah, it's normal.
But they, yeah.
It's fine.
Thank you, Keith and Grosnagetti.
You made my whole life.
Yeah.
And I'm going to retire now.
RNC raising money to help Democrats televise five debates a week.
Oh, man.
This was submitted in our headline forum by I had his name here and now I lost it.
Tom Gaffney, one of our paid subscribers.
So thank you, Tom.
And that was this article went crazy because this was the day after the debate and it was just everybody was saying crazy things again.
And it was just, I feel like it's the same thing all over again, every one of these debates, these crazy sound clips that come out.
It feels like they're trying to, because Trump has like opened the gates of, say, crazy stuff.
Sure.
Everyone's like trying to outcraze each other.
Like Beto's just going all in.
I like how he's just, he's systematically dismantling the Bill of Rights.
Every single one of them.
Do you know what he samples what he said?
I don't have.
He was like, that was, I think this was the debate where he said that we should start taxing churches if they don't agree with him on Bill GPT issues.
Yeah.
Just taxing them?
Or is it like?
Yeah, it was remove the tax exempt status from churches if they disagree.
Which would basically a lot of shirts, just shirts, churches would just close them down.
Yeah.
Oh, totally.
I was helping manage the budget for a small church in San Diego, and it's like razor thin.
Yeah, Archie barely hangs on.
Most of them are having trouble just to be able to get it.
Maybe connect to that Pew Research came out that numbers are going down.
People need to listen to this podcast to come to Christ.
I don't know.
We're going to this.
Are you making a joke about Pew Research?
No.
What's your Pew Research joke that we're going to do soon, Ethan?
It's the stupidest joke, and I didn't expect anybody to like it.
I almost wanted to sewn it and say that someone else thought of it.
It's something I like about the B, the names aren't honest.
You know, exactly.
Pew Research, new Pew Research Survey.
That's hard to say out loud.
Pew Research.
Study survey shows that 100% of church pews are highly uncomfortable.
So dumb.
I like the idea that for years this has been the Pew Research Center's entire mission.
That's what it's always sounded like to me that they're just studying church pews.
We really need a good Photoshop, though.
I just did a picture of Pews.
Oh, did you already put it up?
It's already up there, by the way.
Oh, shoot.
I was thinking you get the guy, the scientist, like examining it.
Oh, yeah, I guess I could do something like that or a guy that looks really uncomfortable.
But it's a podcast day, so I need to run materials.
This is how the sausage is made here, people.
Yeah.
Pew research.
I had another uncle joke today, too.
A lot of uncle jokes.
I'm not even an uncle.
Oh, no, yeah, I am.
Yeah, I am.
Okay.
Did you just disown your niece and nephews?
I'll disown me.
I never think of myself as an uncle, but because we don't see each other very much.
Okay.
Next story.
You want to take this one?
I just want to say that we thoroughly covered that story.
Did we?
We're rushing.
We got a busy day today.
We do, but that was funny.
And we got a long, the interview is pretty beefy.
We want this podcast to feel like you're just lounging about.
Yeah, you're just hanging out in the writer's room.
We're not going to give you anything.
If you want invaluable information about this stuff, don't come here.
Go read stuff.
Go to discern.
We get criticisms of our podcast where people are like, you know, Kyle and Ethan don't know what they're talking about with the news.
Yeah.
That's the point.
Correct.
That is correct.
Yeah.
So anyway, yeah.
So you're sitting here with us and the room is filled with cigar smoke because Ethan's on his fifth cigar.
Kyle's one-fifth into his first cigar.
And choking.
Choking.
What are you talking about?
Yeah.
So anyway.
Okay, let's move on.
Final story.
Satan endorses Paula White's new book.
It's harsh, man.
Satan.
Satan.
That's the guy with the horns, right?
That is the pitchfork.
I wonder where that comes from.
I guess probably medieval art or something.
I have no idea.
But it was big and like, I always remember the old Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck cartoons, like when they were in hell.
That was the scariest stuff, man.
Yeah.
And like those demons are poking everybody with those long pitchforks.
That's true.
That's scary.
The flames are coming up.
Like, who thought that was a good idea for a children's cartoon?
And they have goat legs.
Men with goat legs?
That's scary.
It's weird how close a satyr is to a demon.
Yeah, it must have come from something like that.
Like you just take the pitchfork away, give them a different skin tone, and suddenly they're cute.
Yeah.
Ever think of that?
And they've got the tuminess is like.
Oh, yeah.
That's an easy Halloween costume for him.
He could just go paint himself red and be a demon.
Red face.
Getting red face.
And then the pictures will come out years later.
Yeah.
Yeah, when he's trying to become like vice president of the angelic union of angels.
Yeah.
And then like, you were in red face.
You dressed up as Satan for Halloween 20 years ago, Mr. Tumnus.
So, a bunch...
Trudeau would make a good Tumnus, actually.
I don't know.
It just kind of hit me.
I envisioned it.
True go as dumbness.
Yeah.
Maybe that'll be our next Christian cinematic universe.
Probably won't be, but no, won't be.
Never say never.
But, you know, never.
So a bunch of evangelical pastors endorsed Paula White's new book, which is crazy because she's a heretic.
Okay.
And also.
Is that crazy though in this day and age?
Well, it was weird.
It was almost like, you know, they probably had some, Paula White probably had some PR agent or her publisher had some PR guy who went and emailed a bunch of it because you get those kind of emails.
Even at the Babylon B, we get emails like, hey, we're looking to promote this book that comes out on this day.
Would you share this?
And they'll even send you the copy.
Like, here's what you're supposed to say on your Twitter account.
Just make it easier for you.
It's very fake, you know.
And you'll see that in politics sometimes where like all the Democrats will tweet the same thing or like the same phrase at the same time, you know, same thing on the right, of course.
But so I suspect there were some PR people that were talking to the PR people for all these evangelical pastors and nobody really vetted this.
And they're just like, okay, yeah, we'll promote this thing, you know?
Maybe money exchanged hands.
I don't know.
But I think it's usually not money.
I think it's usually just scratching people's backs or whatever.
I didn't know much about her before all this.
Yeah.
But I know that she'd been.
Yeah, and this kind of like female version of like Joe Osteen or something.
Yeah, that's pretty accurate.
Radio Steen.
You need to.
Now my wheels are turning.
Posting and drag.
Now my wheels are the wheels are turning here.
But she's like been divorced multiple times.
Which, okay, yeah.
I mean, that's something that plagues our whole culture.
So I'm not going to like.
But then to be like, to lift yourself up as this holy, you know, preacher and leader.
What is it, prosperity type stuff?
Is that what her heretic stuff is?
Yeah.
She's a prosperity gospel preacher.
She's one of those multi-millionaires, you know, preaching the gospel, getting rich off of it.
She had some Trinitarian heresy, I think, if I remember right.
She had some issue where she was denying the Trinity and Trinity heresy.
She's shortening it up, making new words up.
So anyway, and she's a big supporter of Donald Trump, which is where this all comes kind of full circle is people were saying, well, they're only supporting her because she supports Trump.
Which is going to be the topic kind of that we're going to get into, like the evangelical support of Trump.
It's kind of weird.
She said that she led Trump to Christ and shared the gospel with him.
But she's like, but he's been a Christian since he was young.
But I share the gospel with him.
And I think she prayed at his inauguration.
Okay.
So we're going to talk about that a little bit.
And when we talk here with Ben Howe.
Yeah, we're talking to Ben Howe.
And one thing that we invented during this discussion with Ben Howe is because Ben Howe is giving, he's doing this book about how Christians and evangelicals were like, we're trying to be moral, but then that's we want moral leaders.
and then suddenly they're like oh but trump's fine and uh so he but he cusses a lot which is kind of a bit of a he's like all these christians are immoral we We should be moral.
But so I invented this.
We came with this idea during this interview that we got sick of the bleep sound effect.
So you just like an old cable, when you put a movie on cable, they just throw a different word over.
Yeah, so it's like, Kyle, you son of a...
Oh, I hit the wrong button.
Dang it.
Ethan.
Kyle, you son of a flowerbed.
So we got that.
So if you ever hear Dave D'Andrea randomly say a word, you'll know that that was a bad word that Ben said.
Me and Kyle never cuss, especially Kyle.
I really don't.
Maybe if I'm really upset.
You say, you say Jack flowerbed.
That's all you say.
Which is barely, it's not even a cuss word, but still.
Did I ever tell by other time that I said the I said that word?
Flowerbed.
Not that word.
Because in C.S. Lewis, he writes about the or he said the characters call each other an ass.
Whoa, They call each other an ass.
Flowerbed.
Referring to a donkey.
Yeah, yeah.
They use it a lot in old, when I read my kids' old fairy tales, that comes up all the time.
And I got all upset.
I told my mom, this book I checked out in my school library has an A word.
She's like, oh, it just means donkey.
So the next day I went to school and I was like calling all my friends.
It's the A word.
But I didn't use it in any proper context.
So I was just like, hey, A word.
When I was in second grade, we were learning how to use the CH sound, T-C-H at the end of a word.
And the teacher's having us list off all these words.
Oh, no.
You can see where this is going.
I had no idea it was a bad word.
I just said it.
I'm just like, flowerbed.
And then I got in trouble.
Or the teacher just looked at me like, no, I'm not writing on the board because they're all writing stitch and ditch and switch.
Anyway, all right.
That's kind of on the teacher.
But anyway, we want we before we get to Ben Howe, we wanted to give a trigger warning.
Oh, yeah, quick trigger warning for Trump supporters.
We know that you guys are sensitive.
Very.
And you are.
We want to respect that.
We want to respect that sensitivity.
You're very special to us, and you are a snowflake.
And every snowflake is unique.
Delicate, unique snowflake.
But all snowflakes are alike in that they all melt when the sun comes.
And so if you are a rabid Trump supporter, you've got a MAGA tattoo, the whole deal.
We just wanted to give a Trump stamp.
Yeah.
Yeah, if you have a, which is a Trump tattoo on your lower back.
Yes.
Just consider this a trigger warning that there will be some criticism of the president during the next portion of the podcast.
So please be aware and shield yourself.
Find a safe space if you need.
Hug your Trump plushie, your Trump body pillow.
And just find yourself a safe space.
Self-care is very, very important.
Indeed.
Presenting an exclusive Babylon B interview.
Everybody, welcome.
We have our exclusive Babylon B interview with, is it Ben Howe?
It is.
Last time I checked.
Howie?
Howie?
Howie.
The East.
You would be surprised.
All the different pronunciations.
One time I was talking to a customer service person, and she said Ben Howie a few times.
And then I said, I said, it's actually Ben Howe.
And she goes, well, different people pronounce it different ways.
I was like, no.
No, they don't, actually.
There's really one pronunciation.
That's like the one word you get to decide to pronounce.
It's your name.
Right.
I mean, I feel like I could change it at any moment.
That's up to me.
Yeah.
I could decide it's pronounced Jeffries.
Yeah.
What could they say?
That's you.
Yeah.
Well, a little introduction here.
Whereas I forgot my glasses today.
Maybe Kyle should read the introduction.
I'll read the introduction.
It's not the bottom version.
It's very long.
No, I can do my own.
Do you want to introduce yourself?
But you have to talk in the third person.
Can you do that?
Ben Howe is an author.
I want you to do inventory.
And try to talk like Kyle.
I'll talk like this.
There you go.
Sizzle.
Put some sizzle on.
Some sizzle reel.
Yeah, I just, I'm an author.
Oh, sorry.
No, he is Ben.
Kow isn't a third person.
Howie.
Ben Howe is an author, columnist, prolific tweeter, and moral failure with a string of bad relationships behind him.
And also the nation's moral authority and confidence.
Under, I have a, I'm getting a door, like, you know, the name on your door.
Yeah.
It's just going to say Ben Howe, chief moralist.
Moralist.
So that's going to be my better than you, other Christians.
That's right.
Okay.
So Ben Howe kind of was the guy, one of the guys who was against Trump.
Are you like one of those league, like the Never Trump or Justice League?
Well, there was a core group of us.
Yeah.
So are you Wonder Woman or I'm incredible?
No, he's the thing.
Wait, is he on the Justice League?
That's the wrong franchise, my friend.
No, I'm Ben Graham.
I was trying to.
Did all the Teen Titans eventually get in the Justice League?
Or could I not reference any of them?
Probably depends on the timeline we're talking about.
No idea.
Ethan draws comics for a living and he doesn't know anything about I think cyborg.
Yeah, Cyborg.
Cyborg was in the Justice League.
That's right.
He definitely was.
My kids watch the new Teen Titans, which is hilarious.
I've written a couple Teen Titans go.
Oh, have you now?
Yeah.
The comic or the show?
Show.
Oh, wow.
I got to tell my kids that.
That was the one where they didn't use any of your jokes, though, right?
Well, I wrote four of them.
There was like three of them, they used almost nothing I wrote.
And then one of them, they used every word.
So it makes me wonder if they were like under the gun on that one and they didn't have time to change it.
You know, what's funny is like when Toy Story came out in the 90s, it was supposed to be this big change in terms of the CGI was going to be the new, like they were introducing that as the new way of doing animation.
But I think the biggest change that was made in the wake of Toy Story was the adult humor being inserted into the films to make them enjoyable for the adults.
Because I want to watch these movies.
Yeah.
I mean, there's always this humor that's going over my kids' heads.
And I'm like, I'm watching it and going, that was about sex, actually.
Yeah, in Hollywood, they call that four quad.
You guys know that term?
Oh, is that really?
Because there's four.
Tell us.
Tell us, Hollywood.
There's four audiences.
There's audiences that you target.
There's like little kids, where there's like junior high, there's high school, or that kind of area.
And there's like all the older adults that are kind of out of touch with all the what's hip and cool.
If you can hit all those audiences with one movie, that's like the biggest money.
That's why you have the biggest budget for a four quad film.
Oh, wow.
Like Mad Max.
Right.
Or heavy metal from back in the 70s.
That's it.
Or something more obscure.
I'm trying to think.
All right.
Well, I can go obscure if you want.
So your book is called The Immoral Majority.
Right.
And it's pronounced exactly like that.
It is.
And I'm going to read a bit of your book blurb here.
It says, Howe, a believer and deeply conservative, analyzes and debunks the intellectual dishonesty and manipulative rhetoric which evangelical leaders use to convince Christians to toe the Republican Party line.
As long as evangelicals prioritize power over persuasion, Howe argues their pews will be empty and their national influence will dwindle.
So let me just ask you, why do you hate America?
Well, my hatred for America is really rooted in my hatred of God, clearly.
Yeah.
Or I wouldn't have written the book in the first place.
Well, we're glad that you can come clean on that.
Yeah.
I just needed to challenge his authority because somebody needs to.
And Satan obviously failed at that.
So I just wanted to step up to the plate.
So is this book primarily about Trump?
Are we talking just Republican Party values in general?
It's actually its current events focused in that Trump, the Trump era is where a lot of what I'm talking about takes place.
But overall, it is about the movement going back to the late 70s with the moral majority and Jerry Falwell and those folks.
And I've been an evangelical all my life.
And my dad worked for Falwell and he went to Dallas Theological Seminary.
And we went to Chris Wells First Baptist Church in Dallas.
I mean, like all over this stuff.
And it's mostly about how it was a movement predicated on the idea.
The evangelical movement was predicated on the idea that they were seeking a higher standard for leadership, not of a particular party, but more about moral character.
They had their big moment of proving that in the 90s with Bill Clinton, where they acknowledged that the economy was good, but they said that that didn't matter in light of these greater concerns.
And now in 2016, what became clear to me and to many other people, I think, was like, no, that's all porpoises.
It's actually just about power.
And once they got that seat, they weren't using it for what they said they were going to use it for.
They said they wanted the seat at the table to be able to represent Christian values in terms of what you should expect out of these leaders.
But really, the seat gives them a position with the Republican Party.
And now they've merged partisanship with faith to such a degree that you can pull the lever as an act of allegiance to God.
So, I mean, is there a way for Christian values, though, to interact with the world and institutions of the world like politics in a way that's faithful?
Absolutely.
I mean, I think that every Christian would be pretty foolish to compartmentalize their faith if they went into the voting booth.
They should be thinking about their faith.
The issue becomes when that faith is dependent upon one political party and that your demonstration of your faith is no longer based on a set of values or principles, but instead on whether or not you're voting for the Republican versus the Democrat, then it's not really a faith-based argument.
It's a political one that's using religion in the same way they would use any other campaign issue.
So I use my, not use.
It's not a drug, but like my faith comes into play anytime I'm in the voting booth.
I get high on G.O.D. Pull out that acoustic guitar.
I'm going to play some addicted to Jesus by Carmen and DC Talk.
Not everything's about Carmen.
Have you ever met Carmen?
I ask every interview that if I can remember too.
I have not.
Sad.
Did you listen to him?
No, you know, my Christian music world started.
What kind of Christian upbringing did you have?
Say your father was a Petra, the Imperials.
Okay.
You know, that kind of stuff.
DC Talk was around, but by then I was already listening to Snoop Dogg.
Okay.
So you'd fall.
You'd already fallen from your faith.
Yeah.
We weren't allowed to listen to secular music.
And then I was the youngest.
I was the youngest.
And my sister was a senior, and she was demanding that we get to listen to the secular music.
And so then I got like in earlier than they did.
We're in the car.
My dad's like, fine.
He turns the radio station.
Literally, the first song is Bel Bid DeVo.
You can turn up in the morning.
You can do me at night.
Are we going to bleep that?
That was good.
We bleep in the morning.
Just bleep out.
Just bleep me.
Yeah.
Bleep out night.
Yeah, everything's worse.
My dad used to wake us up for church on Sunday with a Petra record.
Oh, yeah.
He would just blast it on the, you know, we had the floor stereo and he would just blast it.
And that's how everybody had to get up.
And there was a, I can't remember if it was Imperials or Petra.
I just remember the song, We Are Not of This World.
That was a big one for me.
I thought Imperials was like a doo-op band.
Am I wrong about that?
Like, Bowtown.
You are.
We always did that.
I always like that from Bullfrogs and Butterflies.
There's that, good morning, good morning, good morning.
It's time to rise and shine.
That song.
Oh, no.
That's a good morning song.
My parents were right there in the lyrics.
My parents were cool.
Okay.
So with Petra, they're obviously cool within the dome of that world.
Cool as relative when you're talking about Christian parents.
My parents said, gosh darn it, like plenty of times.
So how much did Hillary Clinton pay you to come out against Trump in the 2016?
The implication here is that the payments have stopped.
Do that or there's a sniper.
How much is she still paying you?
Right.
Or what kind of threats?
It was a little, it wasn't quite that direct.
I mean, it was George Soros.
Oh, gotcha.
They can't do it directly.
What's a meeting with George Soros like?
Do they like drag you into the dark room and he's in his big chair?
I don't know.
The ways that a meeting goes with a guy like George Soros or any of those shadowy figures that are part of a cabal is they just bring in a bunch of money and a photo of one of your loved ones tied up and they ask you which one matters to you most and obviously the money.
So yeah, I assume they have a lead pipe and they're kind of hitting it in their other hand.
Yeah.
Right.
And so that's why I have four kids now instead of five.
But like I did get a lot of money.
So that's worth it.
Yeah, I think so.
It was definitely worth it.
It was a binary choice.
I mean, yeah.
If you have five kids, chances are one of them is dead.
No, yeah.
You're kind of playing the odds at that point.
If you had to compare Trump to a biblical figure, would you say King David or Moses?
Would I say King David or Moses?
Or Cyrus.
The people say Cyrus don't know.
People say Cyrus is.
It's a whole Cyrus thing, but I don't understand.
I don't get it.
Is it supposed to be positive?
Yeah, it is.
Because God used him or something?
The idea is that he is a non-follower of God.
But he used him.
But God used him.
They leave out.
He was told that he was going to be that.
It wasn't like a guess or after the fact.
They were just like, hey, you know, I think God might have used him.
It was a prophecy.
Like, it was discussed.
Could anything in Revelation be Jonah, by the way?
Jonah.
Jonah?
He's Jonah.
Trump is Jonah?
Trump is Jonah.
Trump is Jonah.
I'm fine with.
Is he currently in the whale or in the big fish?
No, because the cool thing about comparing him to Jonah, in my opinion, is because people think of Jonah as a successful prophet, but he's really, really crappy at it.
He was given a mission.
He was going to go to Nineveh and he was supposed to tell them God's wrath's coming if you don't straighten up.
Hand out some chik trucks.
He didn't really like Nineveh, right?
And then he gets thrown off the, you know, and all that.
And everybody's like, oh, it's about redemption.
No, it's not.
It's about not listening because after it was all said and done, he was hacksaw to God for not destroying them.
So he didn't even get the point of his own story.
Yeah, actually, I like how the book of Jonah ends.
He's just sitting there mad.
Right, right.
So that's true.
It's like the ending of a curb your enthusiasm episode.
Yeah, exactly.
That's exactly right.
Oh, curb your enthusiasm.
What a great show.
After making it.
I've never seen it.
He's never seen it.
Pretending like I see it.
Oh, it's on HBO.
So you can't listen to secular music.
What is HBO?
Right.
Never heard of it.
He pretends, yeah.
He also pretends he doesn't watch Game of Thrones.
Y'all aren't the same age I am.
I don't think.
Am I older or younger?
Yeah.
Probably a progression.
He's the youngest.
He's 34.
I'm 39.
I look younger than both of you, but I'm older than him.
I'm 32, by the way.
I keep forgetting he's 32.
He's so young.
I'm 42.
And when the HBO, we couldn't have HBO, but we had it because back then there was a lot of really bad cable filtering.
Oh, yeah.
You could buy a cable box from some shady guy.
It was like Channel 7 was like a fuzzy version.
Yeah.
Well, now there's VidAngel.
I haven't used that.
You don't even use VidAngel.
You know, my dad had, because VidAngel like blocks out the cussing and stuff.
Or you can pick.
You can pick what you want.
Yeah, what you want it to be.
Can we settle this?
By the way, is it cursing or cussing?
I still haven't.
I always said cussing, but I don't know.
I guess cussing is just kind of a southern way of saying cursing, huh?
Kissing.
I never realized that.
You were here cussing.
New Orleans or something.
No, so my dad had this thing called TV Guardian.
Did I ever talk about this on here?
Or it blocks out the, it's supposed to block the cuss words out of movies.
So because my parents used to be very strict about what we could watch, it'd be all Don Knotts and Shirley Temple.
And then when they got TV Guardian, they thought, well, we could watch anything.
Might get all these R-rated movies and stuff.
But the thing is, it taps into the subtitles.
And if there's a cuss word, it mutes for like two seconds when that subtitle's on.
So sometimes the timing is completely off.
And it mutes for two seconds.
And then the moment that it comes back on, they drop a giant F bomb and you miss a chunk of the story.
What they should have done is replaced it with other words.
Yeah.
I don't think this technology is pretty primitive.
So in the TV edit of Dumb and Dumber, he says he's telling him to kiss his butt.
And he says, right on my sandwich.
After you kiss it.
Oh, man.
I love to get a collection of those edits.
Oh, the best one is Die Hard 2.
I can't remember the specific ones, but he goes on a long tirade and it's not even the same voice.
And he's using insults that make no, you know, you're nothing but a cardboard piece of microphone.
Like, it doesn't make any sense at all.
Is that a voice actor that's imitating his voice?
Yeah, I think so.
I think they've got like, you know, they've got the people to do the translations as well.
We're going to find somebody who does that for a living.
Edited like you just said, sandwich.
Yeah.
That's your whole job.
You get a list of replacement cussers.
Yeah, you could actually challenge them.
You know, they have like rappers do the freestyle thing and they'll go on a rap show and like see how well you can freestyle.
Just start throwing sentences at him and see how quickly he can throw in.
You're a stupid flower bed.
He didn't actually say flowerbed, just so you guys know.
Y'all should record some.
Yeah, we just love Dave do it in his baritone voice.
Just completely different than that.
Like even when it's a girl you're interviewing, she comes all of a sudden flowerbed.
Flower bed.
Just give him random words to say.
Wiener dog.
Peach cobbler.
I think wiener dog, you'd have to be careful with that one.
Yeah.
Or you might have to bleed the bleach.
That's a pretty edgy word.
Yeah.
So it invokes certain thoughts.
If Trump named Chick-fil-A the national sandwich, would you support him?
I don't think he has that authority.
It's already the national sandwich.
Well, he doesn't have the authority to do a lot of the things that he does, though.
But he doesn't even have the moral authority to do it.
So no, I would reject it.
What would Trump have to do?
To get my support.
He could get my support if he was afraid of disappointing or turning down what conservatism was because he had a constituency that was willing to hold him accountable.
So for me, it's mostly about the constituency and their unwillingness to hold him accountable as opposed to what he says or does.
He's going to be who he is.
If he, at the very least, was a transactional president, which I don't think he is, who was willing to give for what it is that he wants to receive, and that that giving and receiving had anything to do with what evangelicals and Christians have been claiming it was for decades, then I would be able to make a more pragmatic decision about him.
But as it stands, I feel like supporting him is a negative because too many people already exist around him to give him a pass for everything.
If I join that chorus, even to be pragmatic about it, I'm supporting something I can't support, which is.
I feel like we need a how dare you audio clip.
Oh, yeah.
We need the how dare you.
I'm putting Ethan on the spot because he never remembers which button it's on here somewhere.
It's losing it.
It's losing it.
I think he's going to press the wrong one.
Oh, it's not turned up.
How dare you?
There you go.
Now I feel better.
So you deny the leader that God gave us.
So, I mean, if you were in Nazi Germany, you probably wouldn't even support Hitler.
Well, I will say this.
I don't deny that he was put in this.
I think all leaders are, you know, the Bible talks about that.
But what the mistake that people make is they act like God's a vending machine of gifts.
Like everything that God has a hand in is automatically going to be the best thing you've ever done.
It's a good thing.
Right.
And it doesn't comport very well with all the times that that didn't quite work that way.
Yeah.
Cause he has his own idea about what it is that everything is going to, what the plan is.
So you don't know if you're on the at that particular moment with Trump, the assumption was his victory automatically proved that, well, clearly God's on his side or he wouldn't have won, which was always an interesting thought to me because if Hillary had, then wouldn't they have had to support her?
The same logic or Obama.
We get those emails all the time.
How can you not support the leader that God put in place?
But you never hear that when Obama was president or more like Obummer.
Obummer.
Yeah, well, Hillary.
But like during the election, they would all say, God can use anyone.
And we have to stop Hillary.
And I'm like, wait, I thought you just said God can use anyone.
Like, what happened?
So couldn't God use Hillary?
Right.
And now your heads have exploded.
You've exploded all of our listeners' heads.
How many people just tuned out right then?
Or do you ever do hate listeners stay on longer?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I'm interested to know that who our podcasts are.
Because I think our podcast listeners are a specific crowd.
I think our subscribers are a specific crowd.
And then, you know, people that generally read the articles, it's a little more broad.
I think that's where we get the Trump, probably the more hardcore Trump supporters.
They saw us on Facebook.
Well, it's good that y'all are directly antagonistic to the potential readers you're going to have.
Yeah, that's always a good strategy.
I always feel like we do need to disavow, though, just anything Ben says for our Trump support.
It's convenient timing.
What did you think of this whole idea that a lot of conservatives are supporting Trump just because they have a financial stake?
And we do disavow anything Ben Howe says.
Well, I think it's financial would be, you know, you're talking about the AM radio guys that like their pundits.
You're talking about pundits.
Or even the evangelical leaders, if it feels like their audience, if they're going to lose an audience for taking this stand.
And once again, we disavow anything Ben Howe says on this.
I don't think they draw that connection as blatantly as to like think to themselves, oh, I disagree with this, but I better agree with it.
I don't think that it's that start to convince yourself.
Right.
I think that we have a the biggest problem in our country is self-deception.
And people think of self-deception as like a conscious thing.
Like somebody says what they want.
I'll give you an example.
There's a guy and he just broke up with a girl and he's really heartbroken over it.
And she works in a restaurant.
He's out with some friends and they're trying to decide which restaurant to go to and he names the restaurant that the girl that just dumped him works at.
And all the friends are like, dude, we know why you want to go there.
And then he says, no, actually, they're awesome blossoms.
Incredible.
Good chicken nuggets.
In fact, I care so little about this that I didn't even think about it.
Like, I don't even care.
And the thing is, if you could go in his head at that moment, he believes himself.
Yeah, yeah.
So with the self-deception among pundits, I think it's truly like that sports mentality takes over, that team sport mentality.
And it's less about whether or not they agree.
At some point, it starts with agree or disagree, but eventually it becomes, well, I can't let the Giants win.
They can't let the other team win.
And that's why a lot of times they'll say things like.
To me, they'll say, yeah, Ben, we know your opinion is doing really well when people from the left agree with you as though that's the standard for truth, which is also ridiculous.
Well, you know, we're supposed to follow Jesus and everything that he said was really popular.
He was like the original crowd pleaser.
Yeah.
You know?
I stole that joke from Frank Fleming.
That's true.
That's a Frank Fleming.
Well, it is funny that, you know, when you think about how Jesus disappointed everyone constantly, because they wanted him to show up like on a steed, go straight to the Capitol and like champion their cause by murdering Caesar.
And instead he came in on a donkey and got killed.
Yeah, they probably wanted him to go overthrow Herod or whatever.
Right, not Herod, but Pilate.
And he goes right to the temple.
Right.
He goes right to the heart of the religion when he rode into Jerusalem.
People say that to me, by the way, they go, he's not, Trump's not.
Trump's turning the tables of the money changers over.
That's what he's doing.
And I'm like, dude, he is the money changer.
Maybe he's flipping over his own table.
Ooh.
That's pretty self-reflective.
I'm dropping my microphone.
You can't drop it.
It's on a stand.
Stumps.
They really did ruin the mic drop on radio, didn't they?
Yeah.
I can kind of slam it down, but it doesn't.
You should have a thing, a mic drop like sound.
Oh, yeah.
We could have prop mics right here.
You just pick up and drop.
Look at those.
Dangerous.
See those on the credit card?
If you don't like Trump in America, why don't you just leave?
Why don't you get out?
Go to Canada or something.
I can't afford to.
You can't afford to go to Canada?
Well, Mexico.
That's because Trump has made the economy so amazing.
So amazing that I can't afford to.
Well, you know, ever since I've been bathing in the pools of Never Trump money that came rolling in.
Yeah.
It's really, why would I leave?
That's a good point.
Yeah.
So you just like tweet something against Trump and then you have your PayPal link in there so people can just send you money.
Yeah, you know that sound effect?
Like cha-ching.
Like I sent my computer.
Anytime an email from PayPal comes in, it goes, cha-ching, you hate God.
I like those people that are really blatant grifters on Twitter and they actually do that.
Like they'll have a pin tweet like, if you like my, you know, virtue signaling, please send, please Venmo me.
People that just have it in their profile.
I want to see a study.
I want to see a study of how many people are panhandling on Twitter, like between GoFundMe and Venmo and everything else.
Like how many people are literally just on Twitter begging and then see it represented as a homeless population, like in a city?
Like what would that look like?
What percentage of it?
Because it really is just like you're on Twitter and it's like you're in a city and there's people coming at you all the time.
I get DMs all the time from people.
This guy was like really good cause.
You know, it was GoFundMe.
It was really good cause.
And I looked at it and I was like, oh, wow, this kid needs help.
And there's the sickness and surgery.
And okay, we're almost at our goal of 10,000.
Well, let me retweet that for you.
And it was at like 9,500.
And then two days later, I got a DM from him again.
And he was like, we're almost there.
And it was at 7,500.
And I was like, I went and compared the links.
It was two different GoFundMe links with the same description.
Oh, he had two different GoFundMes going?
Yeah, he probably got caught.
Oh, wow.
Okay.
But like, this is the kinds of, because these are the kinds of scams that people offer.
And then, you know, then if you're somebody who does what I do, people come after you as though that's what you're doing.
Because I made a documentary in 2016 that was crowdfunded.
I raised 30 grand to do the film.
That's right.
And then I started raising money for another film in 2018.
And we decided that we're going to do it in 2020 because we didn't even raise enough money.
And I have people coming at me all the time going, where's that money?
Like, what did you do with it?
Are you out there swimming in it right now?
And I'm like, we didn't raise the money.
We're trying to figure out how to make it.
So that was just so, and if anybody thinks I'm unpopular, the answer is yes.
People have a really weird perception of money.
Like they'll look at a Kickstarter and go, you made $150,000.
Yeah.
You know, you're buying that mansion.
And you're like, well, actually, 90% of it went to the product.
You know, developing shipping was shockingly expensive.
People don't understand net worth either.
They think that he's got like $150 billion in the bank.
Right.
You know, I mean, he may.
He could.
That's possible.
But yeah, it's like all the, it's all the worth of their stocks if they were to sell it right now at that full price.
Which would destroy the price.
Which would destroy the price of the stock.
And yeah.
All right.
So we're going to throw out a challenge to you here.
Trump has to be, based on his claims about himself, Trump has to be either liar, lunatic, or lord.
That's it.
That's CS.
I had known someone else in history that had that description.
Let's just go down the list.
Liar.
So liar?
No.
The words he says are true.
Yeah, he says everything.
Well, he speaks truth.
He thinks they're true.
Right.
I think if you give a lie detector to Trump and he said two completely contradictory statements, he believes both of them.
That's because he's double true.
It's very honest.
He's two times as true as the rest of us.
Oh, man, double true.
I'm going to start using it.
And he can't be a lunatic because we know he's a stable genius.
That's also true.
That one's out.
But honestly, there's really no reason to question it because not only has he said he's a stable genius and clearly he's said that he's the chosen one.
Right.
The chosen one of God.
That's right.
He gave us the answer.
And so that leaves only one option.
And can I just say, God doesn't ever give us direct answers like that.
So, you know, good on him.
He does it through profits.
We're sitting here asking God all the time to tell us what's going on.
Trump tells us and then we hold it against him.
It's messed up.
Y'all are convincing me.
We keep asking God to speak to us.
And the whole time, Trump is there.
He's right there.
When we look back on the footprints of our life and there was only one set of footprints, that's when Trump was carrying us.
No, he's not carrying us.
There was one set of footprints and then like what was clearly a body at some point.
He dragged a running body, kicking and screaming in the dirt.
So if Hillary had won, he'd be happier?
No.
Let's get that out of the way.
It sounds like to me.
It sounds like you want Hillary to win.
The problem for me with 2016 is that a lot of people view me as having wanted a particular outcome.
Really, it was like waking up one day and finding out that the job you've been going to for 10 years was fake and that you're not going to get any money and you're getting evicted.
Like my whole understanding of the electoral process changed that year, not because I wanted one side to win or the other.
So it's like one of those people that goes on a show like the Carbonaro effect or something where it's like all a hidden camera show and they think oil or like fear factor.
They think they have a job and then it turns out it was all pranked.
Those are the most messed up pranks when they do that.
Really messed up.
I always hope a new job opportunity.
I'm a good rat that's going to kill me.
I could have fed my kids, but turns out this is a comedy show that I won't make money on.
My hope is always that they actually have a job.
Yeah.
Right.
And then we pranked the new guy.
Or at least still.
Except now they're on TV interviewing elsewhere.
So their boss is like, that was really funny.
By the way, you're fired.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Because we can't afford to keep you when you're looking for a job.
Oh, it looks like, yeah, you're looking for another job.
Right.
That's crazy.
Sorry.
So coming out against Trump, you also denied the words.
Coming out.
That's a good word.
You also denied the words of his prophet, Paula White.
And that's very concerning to me.
Well, in Paula White's world, Trump is obviously the closest to God on earth.
I mean, your prosperity is a direct correlation between your closeness to God.
And really, it makes you wonder why they ever even give lip service to helping the poor who are clearly the dregs of society and the enemies of God.
Well, she was the very first female heretic to pray at the inauguration.
So Trump is lifting up women.
That's true.
It's huge.
When did he become Episcopalian?
Am I right?
I don't believe anything I just said for the last three minutes, just to be clear.
I like how we weave in and out of weeds about everything Ben says.
The humor and then no one's going to be able to tell.
Yeah, we're gaslighting them.
This is just like my ex-girlfriend.
We do this on the podcast a lot.
We try to get people to say really controversial things and then we name the podcast.
Yeah, we know, yeah, because we need good clickbait.
Ben Howe supports Trump for the first time.
Right.
Well, somebody will now have a clip because what I've noticed is that after I give one of those parody style answers, y'all stay quiet long enough after I've said it to make sure there's some room to cut it out.
No, we're just really bad.
Without any overlap, you know?
Yeah.
You act like we know what we're doing.
Yeah.
You're under the delusion.
Well, I don't know exactly which episodes will go on, but we're like 20 episodes in.
We're pretty new at this.
All right.
It's not rocket science.
We're only 20 episodes in talking to people.
Interviewing.
They'll finish an answer and you realize you're supposed to say something back.
I'm like, that's like my mind shuts down.
And you just want to think about it for a while.
And I look at Kylo and Kyler reads one of the jokes we wrote before he came in.
I usually don't.
They're called talking points, by the way.
They're called talking points.
Oh, man.
It was funny before I went on the book tour when the book came out in August.
I had these, and this is a flaw.
I'm not saying this is a good thing.
I had a lot of people who had books published before.
I had my editor.
I had my agent.
Everybody.
Listen, you've done TV before.
You've done interviews before.
But this is like your thing.
And you really need to have some key points memorized.
You need to write some talk.
And as the weeks were coming, okay, I'm going to get note cards.
So I got the note cards and I never opened them.
And, you know, I was like, I really need to, I really need to do that.
And then I just started answering in a way that was scary for them.
I was just going, I think I'm going to wing it.
Don't wing it.
Do not wing it.
I'm like, right, right, right, right.
I think I'm going to wing it, though.
Like, I think it's just what I'm going to do.
And it luckily worked out okay since I'm clearly a good tool of the liberal cabal.
So it was all softball anyway.
Yeah, I find it's good to like get on some smaller podcasts first and practice.
It's easier to find your answers than to like try to write them ahead of time.
Yeah.
Why do you think I'm here?
Yeah, same starting with that.
I'm glad we can help you out.
Starting in the big leagues here.
Yeah.
Sad.
There's a lot of buildup getting to this point.
Yeah, this is pretty huge.
So what, uh, where could people check out your book?
Uh, they can uh check it out at the local library, actually, but they can uh buy it on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.
Oh, we don't, we don't pay.
Our readers don't pay for books.
Oh, well, they can get it.
There's a lot of those ripped download sites.
There you go.
So, where can they download stuff like that?
If they email me, I'm basically craving attention all the time.
So, if they'll just pay attention to me for a minute, I'll probably just send them a copy.
That's awesome.
All right, you're on Twitter.
I gave you a copy and you didn't.
Yeah, you just handed it.
He didn't even ask for it.
Yeah.
I'm trying to give you a chance to promote yourself here, and you're just telling jokes.
Oh, my bad.
Well, I'm going to be at the Laugh Factory.
No, it's you can find me at every bookstore.
Well, I mean, in fairness to me, where do you think you find books?
Where can we find books?
Twitter, your Ben Howe.
I assume it's not on Amazon or at any bookstore.
Why would I want it, Dre?
And it's against Trump, so it's not at the Christian bookstore.
Right.
It's in the bookstore at my local church.
And it's the only place you can get it.
Right.
It's in the trash bin.
And it's $79.95.
Okay.
But you can find me at Twitter at Ben Howe.
I write randomly, and then you can also hear me at the Fifth Estate podcast on iTunes.
Although Jay and I have, for some reason, not done it in like four weeks.
So please don't expect much.
I launched an unfollowed podcast, is what I call it, which is just me.
I launched it in July.
I have not done an episode yet.
So the book is out there, though, if you want to check that out.
Podcast with nothing on it.
I have a procrastination that you cannot even begin to comprehend.
We got the idea to have you on from Kira Davis from Red State.
Your friends, so shout out to Kira.
I mean, friends.
Friends.
That's a pretty.
Yeah.
She was telling you how she hates your book.
It's a strong word to use.
She was attacked by a dog when she had that book in the park.
Oh.
Yeah.
Because of the book.
The dog was a pro-Trump dog.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was a pro-Trump dog.
Or at the very least, it was a dog that believes in God, unlike Christian dog.
Right.
Yeah.
Amen.
Yeah.
Amen to that.
Well, thanks for coming on, Ben.
Yeah.
Thank you, Ben.
Great talk.
And everybody vote for Trump 2020.
And we disavow everything Ben said.
Sweet.
All right.
Bye.
All right.
And that was the first half of the interview with Ben Howe.
There will be more in the subscriber portion.
If you want to hear more, we go deeper.
Then you need to subscribe.
You need to hand us money.
We are standing outside of the grocery store holding out our hand.
We forgot.
We need to hate mail.
Please give us some money.
Oh, shoot.
Did we not do a hate mail with Ben?
I don't think we did it with him there, no.
No, we did it.
Didn't we do all the Trump?
No, no, no, that was Adam.
We did Adam Ford.
Okay, stand by.
I had to stop the recording or make this part of the video.
Wait, wait.
I've got a good one.
We have a new one that just came in, right?
Yeah, we do have it.
You have it like handy?
Hold on.
If I can.
Let's see how fast Kyle is.
We're keeping it recording.
We're recording.
Seth is like the.
I'll give you time here on the, we'll do the thing here.
I really miss Adam Ford.
Seth is like the ultimate entrepreneur.
Yes, he is.
And that means that he has a bunch of apps for us to use.
Yeah, he is like gung-ho about these flowerbed apps.
So, like, all these Silicon Valley, like, you know, all these startups are like, oh, this app manages your company's.
Yeah, it's always named something like Squiddle or like just like a random word.
Was that you that did that on Twitter?
The say a random thing and see if it's an app.
Yeah, see if it's an app, search it.
And like it almost always is.
Yeah.
Squib.
Squib.
Squiddle.
Okay, so here's one.
Here's some hate mail.
Make sure you read it dramatically.
Okay.
So this was a.
Is there any swearing in it?
Usually not.
Trump supporters.
Oh, sometimes in you.
Yeah, sometimes it's true.
Okay.
So we sent out our newsletter and the top story was a Frank Fleming article.
Democrats storm out of...
Wait, did you say Frank Fleming?
I don't say Frank.
You know, you're getting your reaction time down.
Getting better.
Democrats storm out of Syria meeting after getting into shouting match with Trump over whether a hot dog is a sandwich.
Of all the completely harmless Trump humor, that is the most harmless.
And yet, here's, oh, and I named the email, that newsletter, Trump is a very sick man in quotes.
So I think that made this person think it was.
How dare you?
All right, so here's what this person's name is.
How dare you?
Sorry, go ahead.
Sorry.
I will unsubscribe to you.
But first, who gave you the right to send me anything?
Much less an email dogging the president of the United States.
Hot dogging.
Maybe you should be speaking about the corrupt Clintons and the previous administration.
Yes.
Obama will go down as the worst president in history.
You Democrats just don't get it.
Ha!
Then there's Nancy Pelosi.
Sent from my eye.
That's the end.
That's the end.
Then there's Nancy Pelosi.
No, and then just, if they said it to you in person, they just nod at the end.
I think I've made my point.
What is that?
What is that?
What is it?
Oh, no, not the bees.
Not the bees.
I just threw that on there.
Sorry.
Did you press the wrong button?
That was a preview for next week's podcast.
Oh, okay.
That's our horror episode.
Yeah, we're going to do a horror movie episode with Brian Gadawa, the Hollywood guy.
Was that The Wicker Man?
Yeah, that was Nick Cage covered in bees.
That is my favorite.
Not the bees.
Not the bees.
Yeah, a little taste.
All right, but if you like the bees, then we need you to subscribe to hear the rest of the podcast.
And you can do that by going to BabylonB.com slash plans and subscribe.
Throw money at the screen, and you will be entered into paradise.
I also wanted to mention we actually have a way for you to contact us now.
Oh, yeah.
So we love feedback.
We love feedback.
Feedback.
We'll probably read it, maybe.
Questions?
We do some question and answer, usually in the subscriber segment, but maybe we'll do it in the public segment sometime.
And if you want to send us questions, any feedback, you want to tell us how great we are, podcast at BabylonB.com.
I was thinking it was podcasts plural for some reason, but I'm pretty sure it's podcast.
I'm pretty sure it's podcast at babylonbee.com.
So try that.
And if it doesn't work, sorry, I got the try them both.
CC podcast.
It's podcast at BabylonB.com.
So send us an email.
All right.
And with that, see you next week.
Kyle and Ethan would like to thank Seth Dylan for paying the bills, Adam Ford for creating their job, the other writers for tirelessly pitching headlines, the subscribers, and you, the listener.
Until next time, this is Dave D'Andrea, the voice of the Babylon Bee, reminding you to go forth and get addicted to Jesus.
What?
This article I did with the always pads.
Oh, yeah.
It's funny.
It was like monster trucks jumping.
John Cena's.
Oh, yeah, the elbow drop.
So stupid.
All right.
What are we doing?
All right.
Get ready for.
So here we are.
We're in the subscriber portion right now, but we got a new intro for it.
So listen to this, Kyle.
Oh, yeah.
Welcome to the Babylon Bee Subscribers Only Lounge on the third floor of the Babylon Bee audio yacht, floating on a glistening ocean of crisp dollar bills.
Now that we've tossed those free-loading stowaways overboard, come on in and kick back.
Put your feet up in one of our fine ramskin easy chairs.
Uncork a bottle of finely aged Welch's grape juice and a golden bucket of cheesy fish crackers.
Treat yourself to some free Carmen coloring books or one of our complimentary DC Talk body pillows as you enter into the rich and silky world of the Babylon Bee subscriber exclusive luxury podcast experience.