Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool

Feb. 16, 2023 - Adventures in HellwQrld

01:30:47

Adventures in HellwQrld Episode #126: Trains and Dead Nazis with AZRWW

This week Mike is underwater apparently (Will figure out the mic issues for next week) and Sarge is off celebrating with the Chiefs so Haley stops by to talk about train derailments and Tiki Torch Nazis that have left this cruel world. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Large

Audio Only |

Scroll

Time	Text
	.
	Content Warning.
	The Adventures in Hellworld Podcast talks in depth about QAnon, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse
	and violence against people.
	Listener discretion advised.
	Hello everybody.
	I am Mike Rains, AKA Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
	This week Sarge is off celebrating his football team being good at football.
	So we have somebody who will never deal with that fate, Arizona Cardinal, Fan Haley.
	Oh, come on.
	Like, I don't know sports, but come on.
	They gotta be, they gotta win sometime, right?
	Hello everybody.
	Yes, maybe sometime in your life, who knows?
	And I'm also joined by the mysterious Elle.
	Hi-de-lee-ho, beautiful baberinos!
	I wasn't here last week for my babies, but I'm back.
	Yes, thank God, he's returned.
	And more me than ever.
	That's right, I got enhancement surgery.
	I'm enhanced, just generally.
	Yes.
	Specifically in my penis, though.
	I was like, hey, just touch me up.
	That's all.
	Two.
	They saw two gigabytes more RAM into it.
	It's powerful.
	Would you like get the vaccine or something?
	No, that was for 5G.
	I noticed that after I had my 5G, since I was using it a lot more, I was just like, man, I need some more RAM in this thing.
	What can I say?
	Ladies love somebody who's vaxxed up.
	Oh, there's nothing I enjoy more than like that alternate world where like people are like, my husband got vaccinated and now he's gonna give me the evil vaccine when we when we have sex and it's like, that's not how any of this works.
	Shedding.
	Yeah, shedding.
	Yeah.
	Is it not medically called a hot beef injection?
	Is that not a proper medical term for what is happening during the process of sex?
	I don't think so, but maybe.
	I mean, I know that Dr. Chillbro might call it that, but I don't know if actual people in white lab coats would say that.
	Man, I definitely want to make some sort of roleplay character now named Dr. Chillbro.
	That's what it's all about.
	Yes, of the Westshire Chill Bros, you're correct.
	I received only the finest schooling.
	Yeah, I played Ultimate at Harvard.
	How do you like that?
	There was a... I saw, like, there was a college hockey on my televisions recently for some horrible reason.
	Yeah, that sounds... Couldn't you find a test pattern, or like a local affiliate or something?
	Yeah, and they were interviewing one of the players, and the man's first name was Gunnerwolf.
	And I was like, man, that is a busy name, Gunnerwolf.
	It does rule.
	I know someone personally who gave their child's middle name over to the moniker Rock and Roll.
	I don't want to say the rest of their name, but their middle name is Rock and Roll.
	I was like, wow, you have a powerful love for a genre of music, the likes of which I could never Yeah, like, Mysterious L is never going to produce spawn and just be like, you know what, you're Underground Hip Hop L. You're like L Jr., also known as Underground Hip Hop L Jr.
	Yeah.
	Goth Dance.
	That's the name of my child.
	Wednesday Adams Dance.
	Wednesday Goth Adams Dance.
	It's just like a word soup of different terms.
	Yeah.
	I don't know, man.
	I mean, in general, it's like, you know, generally names would just be weird, you know?
	All the names that we associate with being just normal, like Chris and Paul and stuff, it's just like, yeah, that was just people naming stuff after their favorite book.
	So who are you to turn your nose up to a Daenerys?
	Hi, I'm 13 and my name's Daenerys Smith.
	And you're just like, wow, what a stupid name.
	And it's like, how about you shut up, like Paul Johnson or whatever?
	Like, what are you talking about?
	Oh yeah, you're Paul Carpenter, a guy from your favorite book in your parents' profession.
	Shut up, you dickhead!
	Smith!
	The last name Smith is just literally Blacksmith, and that's why it's the most common name in the world.
	Because everyone was a Smith of some kind back in the day.
	Yeah, that's why we all know so many Muhammad Smiths.
	Yes.
	Okay, that's enough amping.
	We've covered a wide variety of topics, but now that I'm back in the saddle, and I'm never the one who gets us off topic.
	So now that I'm here, this trade is going to go straight, which that is foreshadowing.
	I'm a genius.
	Anyway, it's time for us to get into our first segment of the show.
	It's called the Amuse Bouche!
	It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
	Get ready for the Amuse Bouche!
	According to Maya Moo's booze notes, it looks like our guest host Haley is running for presidential office in 2024, so a big shout out to guest host Haley for her presidential run in 2024.
	It's true.
	What chrome-plated balls do you have to stand up to Trump inside of the Republican Party, known Republican that you are?
	It's true.
	No, of course, I'm talking about a different Haley, and for the actual details on this story, I'll turn it over to Mike, who actually knows shit about this, because aside from the tiny amount of facts I just displayed, I got nothing.
	Mike, who is this person, and why are they deciding to run against Trump?
	Nikki Haley was a Trump supporter and she was in his administration for a while and then one day she mysteriously resigned and said it retroactively to before when Khashoggi got murdered by the Saudis, which made it seem like maybe she knew something was up about all that shit and she didn't want to have any blame cast upon her.
	But maybe being sort of involved in an actual murder was like a little too much for her.
	She's like, yeah, yeah, maybe having this guy.
	Don't worry, nobody, nobody that was involved beyond like, like, you know, they put to death like 24 people or whatever, but it was just like all the people were actually responsible for that.
	Got free, baby.
	Yeah.
	So yeah, she has declared her run for the Republican nomination.
	She didn't attack Trump, which is an incredibly easy way to lose to Trump, I have to say.
	She's a woman.
	She's a woman, which is also absolutely foreboding in the Republican Party for you being allowed to win an election or a primary.
	Her parents are immigrants and like the brown kind.
	Oh yeah.
	Yep.
	Yeah, I actually see a headline, Nikki Haley is running for president as first woman of color for GOP and it's like, all those things you just said are disqualifying to the Republican primary voters.
	Let's not kid ourselves.
	Do you think there's a level of blonde and attractive that a woman could be where she could make a run at president and Republicans wouldn't immediately recoil like a vampire confronted with garlic?
	I do think that's possible.
	And do you think that they would need to have, like, unquestionable bikini shots so that there was no question that they weren't packing a secret penis?
	Not that that should matter, but it totally would.
	Like, conservatives would just be like, man, she's so hot and I love that she wants a gun in every school, but I don't know, man, there's always a chance that there's a secret wiener down there because I'm a weirdo conservative.
	That would be really interesting to see if, like, let's just say, for the sake of argument, that Kerry Lake had won in Arizona, and then she wins in Arizona, Donald Trump drops dead, and DeSantis just looks like the PUD that he is, and then Kerry Lake is like, I can take that PUD, he sucks, and she declares her president against DeSantis.
	I totally think, like, DeSantis is something Lake could have won, were she the governor of Arizona.
	And at that point, like, does DeSantis have, like, the nerve to get so into the gutter that he's willing to start the transvestigation whisper campaign against her?
	Like, I think that would be, like, a level of, like, just sliminess in politics that I'd want to see if they were willing to do it.
	Because Trump would.
	Trump would absolutely call any woman candidate who was going against him a man.
	He would 100%, like, re-truth a bunch of QAnon people being like, Kerry Lake, is she a dude?
	I don't know.
	I'm just, I'm just asking.
	Yeah.
	He'd just be like, I'm not saying anything, but you know, it's kind of weird.
	Look at the ball.
	Don't know though.
	Whatever.
	So weird.
	Donald Trump probably hasn't like, hasn't been around generally.
	He wasn't paying to be around in a long time.
	Yeah.
	Also, we didn't have to, like, have this fine line of fascism, like, when Carrie was running.
	It's like, yeah, she's being a hateful fucking bigot, but also she's, like, vacuuming Trump's carpet.
	Oh my god, that was so weird, that photo of her vacuuming the carpet.
	Oh my god.
	It's like the ladies stay inside and do the chores, but I'm not going to do it, kind of.
	Fascist.
	Yeah, because of course, every time they're just like, hey, we want to take America back to what America was at its best.
	They're talking about 1952.
	They want black and white television Americana.
	But they want exactly the, they want black and white television Americana.
	They want to go back to when it was just like, yeah, everyone's white and guys are going
	to work in suits and they're coming back and their wives have their dinner ready on the
	table and everything's hunky dory.
	And it's just like, yeah, because those television shows never really talked about any of the bad stuff.
	Leave It to Beaver was not a documentary made.
	But that's what they want.
	That's all they want in life, is to just go back to a Norman Rockwell picture of what America used to be.
	And also, specifically the ones he made of just white people, ignoring the ones that he made of colored people.
	Yes.
	Yeah, like, and they don't want to talk about what a man from the 1950s was like, which was probably some guy in his like 30s, suffering from crippling PTSD from being in the fucking war that he was drafted into to kill.
	That's when men were men.
	Okay.
	You know, when you got Horrible, horrible, crippling PTSD.
	Yeah, and women loved big sunglasses because it helped cover up their black eyes because their husbands were just like PTSD riddled, like, just like punchy drunks because their lives got ruined by a world war.
	Right, exactly.
	And they weren't allowed to get therapy because that meant you were weak.
	So it's just like, yeah, just just deal with your crippling mental disabilities through domestic violence and alcoholism.
	That's how you're gonna cope.
	That was when every suburban house had a room dedicated to just, like, a big leather chair where a man could just go sit in silence and drink.
	And maybe smoke cigars while he's drinking.
	That was therapy.
	Their little office or study or whatever where they would just go sit in a comfortable chair and just drink.
	Yeah, just drink.
	Just try to get the echo of the shells hitting around them out of their head and all that stuff.
	It's just like, yeah, we as a society were incredibly healthy in the 1950s.
	And that's what these people want America to be again.
	Just that.
	Well, I mean, our current America is so woke that this Haley person thinks that she can run for the highest office in the land.
	So what do we think her actual odds are?
	Zero?
	She's gonna get like 1%.
	She has no chance of winning.
	This is a book tour.
	This is... A book tour it is!
	This is a book tour, and this is also, I might add, a trial balloon to be Trump's vice president.
	Because again, as we've talked about repeatedly on the podcast, Trump World... What did you call it?
	Yeah, Trump World.
	No, did you call it a trial balloon?
	Yes, I did.
	You gotta keep that, you can't be using the B word right now, Mike.
	I'm sorry.
	How dare you?
	You gotta be sensitive to the people of America.
	Yeah, that's where we start shooting.
	Yeah, so Trump world wants a female vice president.
	So I feel like Haley is just doing this thing, trying to raise her public awareness and people
	being like, Oh, I know that lady.
	So she can be like, hey, I'm the pick for vice president, not Marjorie Taylor Greene or Naomi.
	Or, uh, Tulsi Gabbard or any of these other people.
	I feel like our new Taylor Greene definitely didn't help her case by, like, Statler and Waldorf-ing all throughout the State of the Union or whatever, in her big, like, Disney supervillain coat, just, like, hooting and hollering like an actual zoo animal.
	What is wrong with you?
	You're like, allegedly, you know, an elected official.
	Like, calm it down!
	You're behaving like you're drunk at a bachelorette party and some comedian you don't like is on stage.
	Like, even if you don't like her, that's still the President of the United States and you're like a fucking congressperson or whatever.
	Jesus Christ, anyway.
	Yes.
	Yeah, so I think that the other thing that people are bringing up was that she opened her campaign kickoff with Pastor Hagee as her intro, as her hype man.
	This is a guy who literally said that Hurricane Katrina was punishment for gay people, and he's a total nut.
	So the fact that mild centrist Nikki Haley is having that guy intro her tells you what moderate republicanism in the year of our Lord 2023 is.
	It's where you can bring a, As much as I'd like to retread all of our Hurricane Katrina material about why the hurricane didn't hit San Francisco in that case, unfortunately we don't have the time.
	That would be great, and I assure you all that material is still fresh and amusing, but we're going to sidestep that and talk about Uh, heavy sigh.
	Elon Musk, again.
	I guess.
	Every week, this fucking clown.
	I'm like, God, isn't he out of money yet?
	Anyway, why are we talking about Elon Musk this week, Mike?
	Uh, because Elon Musk, uh, is the biggest, saddest man-baby in the world, and, um... Oh my God, if that's the bar, we'll never be rid of him.
	Yes.
	Imagine how crazy it would be if one day we were just like, breaking news, Elon Musk has gotten his shit together, and has apologized, and he donated all of his wealth to charities, and he's a cool guy now.
	Oh, man.
	Oh, dare to dream.
	Oh, man.
	That would be beyond magical.
	If we actually got a redemption arc out of Elon, that would be the wildest timeline.
	His hair plugs fell out, so you know he's a good guy again.
	Elon be normal challenge impossible, yes.
	So, uh, Elon basically he posted a thing where he was like, go Eagles!
	And then he deleted it after the game, and people were like, oh he deleted it because the Eagles lost, way to suck Elon back in a loser, haha!
	It actually turned out the reason why he deleted the tweet was because Biden, who is the Scranton kid and all this kinds of stuff and thus backs Philadelphia sports teams, Biden also posted a pro Eagles tweet before the bowl.
	And Biden's tweet got 28 million views worth of engagement, whereas baby little Elon only got 9 million views for his tweet.
	So he got dunked on by boring old dark Brandon.
	And Again, even if you don't like him, he's still the President of the United States.
	Like, yeah, man's got reach.
	In fact, every once in a while, he just gets to get up on camera and talk to any American that wants to listen to him all at once.
	He just gets to be like, hey, guess what?
	For this period of time, it's gonna be all me.
	Yes.
	And Elon's trying to amend the Constitution so he can be President, so that can happen for him, because that's all he wants.
	So Elon deleted the tweet because he didn't get as much engagement as the President of the United States and he found that humiliating.
	And then he called his engineers into the office and demanded they create an algorithm that would pump him out and promote his tweets more than anybody else's so everyone has to see Elon all the time on Twitter.
	It really is nonstop.
	I do not follow him.
	I blocked him because it was like, hey, everything is Elon right now.
	The website really just sucks right now.
	Like a week ago, I blocked him.
	So like now that blocking him actually makes him sad is like the greatest thing in the world.
	Just knowing that he would care about that, like, get on it.
	If you're listening to this and you haven't yet blocked Elon Musk on Twitter and you don't have, like, a financial reason to keep him around, like, if you're a reporter or whatever, then sucks to suck.
	You have to listen to what Elon Musk has to say.
	You'll see the screenshots.
	As soon as he tweets, everybody screenshots and talks about what he says.
	You'll see it.
	We are probably not reporters.
	Again, this is allegedly a comedy show because Mike is an expert, but the rest of us don't.
	Well, I guess when Haley's guest hosting, she's probably like an expert about Arizona shit.
	I'm an expert about nothing.
	I do, right?
	No shit.
	I don't know shit about shit.
	That's right, watch.
	So all of this financial advice that I'm about to give you, and it is financial advice, you should take it.
	Anyway, bye, Twitter stock!
	Let's go through the roof, baby!
	Do not do that.
	Tesla's almost at 200.
	It was at 800 a long time ago.
	Tesla to the moon!
	Actually... Dude, when it bounces back, you're all gonna be so jellied by Tesla stocks.
	Oh god.
	I'll tell you what, Tesla, when you get down to below 15, maybe I'll take a fly out of Tesla stock.
	Yes!
	Yeah, so right now just it is is incredible how Twitter is literally just some sad rich man's playpen and he's just pooping in it and just like whining and throwing his poop everywhere and everyone has to listen to me because I own this thing and I'm a huge baby.
	Which is crazy because he already did like I mean, normally when rich people have their midlife crisis or whatever, they just go and find an attractive partner or whatever, but he already had his attractive vanity partner.
	I don't believe Elon Musk is capable of the sensation of human love, so yeah, his relationship with Grimes to me is just a weird historical footnote that is interesting to look at.
	I don't treat it as a real relationship, because I don't think he's capable of one.
	He's just a sad dude who wants people to notice him and wants women to be around him because that's what's expected of him.
	And he doesn't want to be seen as being a lonely guy.
	He bought his way into all those sad cameos on Marvel movies and Rick and Morty and The Simpsons and all this stuff.
	It's like, dude, just be a billionaire.
	That's the life.
	I can't imagine being a billionaire and being like, I need more.
	My soul is still empty.
	It's so, so sad.
	Twitter's for poor people who have nothing to do.
	Let us just be on social media.
	Go do your own thing.
	Right, exactly.
	I feel like Richard Branson gets it.
	That guy's a bajillionaire and he loves attention, so once every five years or whatever, he'll do some big stunt and get a bunch of attention all at once.
	Then he just fucks off into the background, being a billionaire, doing stuff that he's passionate about for a few years, until he's like, oh man, I need that hit of attention again.
	And then he's like, I'm gonna send Wagyu beef into space!
	Am I right, guys?
	And everyone's like, Richard Branson, what a guy.
	And then he fucks off for a while again.
	It's great.
	And after the Wagyu's beef comes back from space, Gordon Ramsay's gonna make a steak out of it, and we're gonna see what space steak tastes like.
	And it's like, wow, what a crazy idea, Richard Branson, you lunatic.
	I mean, that does sound like the sort of shit I would expect an eccentric billionaire to be doing, right?
	Like, hey, I want space steak.
	And they're like, that doesn't exist.
	And he's just like, well, I have a spaceship, so fucking make it exist!
	Yes!
	Put some goddamn steak into space!
	Do what I say!
	I work like 200 billion dollars or whatever.
	You do what I say.
	That's what Elon Musk should be doing.
	Weird eccentric shit like that.
	Instead he's buying Twitter.
	A bunch of people did like, even though I felt like nobody really ever loved it, so as soon as Elon Musk took it over, it was just like, oh, we'll just fuck off for this as soon as we, or, as soon as it's just like, oh, this is giving me bad vibes, we're gonna burn it down like that scene in Rick and Morty, and just walk out of there and light it on fire.
	So it's just like, everyone was just immediately willing to jump ship if there was anything better, or anything even equivalent.
	Like, hey, welcome to Twitter, come twoot with us, it's the same thing that Twitter was two years ago.
	You're like, sold, sold yesterday.
	I'm there.
	I'm there.
	Yeah.
	Oh God, you can find my Twitter handle.
	Nailed it.
	Yeah.
	Anyway, I would be remissed if we got through this portion of the show without me mentioning Elon Musk's deformed penis, because it's just so deformed.
	It's really something else.
	If he could get me to stop talking about this for the price of one million United States dollars, I'll stop talking about his penis.
	In fact, I might actually say some nice things about it.
	I'll leave a sweet in the dill a little bit there, Elon.
	You know where to find me.
	On Twitter, for the time being.
	I've blocked you, so you're going to have to get your crack team to unblock you.
	But then I'll know you're serious.
	Because your ass is blocked, and if you start creeping my DMs for $1 million, I'll be like, sweet.
	Yes!
	I did it.
	Finally, finally our mild blackmail has worked and we've gotten a million dollars out of- And don't let your pride stop you.
	In fact, I'll allow you to look at it as a big win for you, where you just leveraged your tremendous financial advantage over me to get me to do a thing.
	And I'll just be like, yeah, he totally cucked me as I count your one million United States dollars.
	Yes!
	Ah, capitalism.
	The most beautiful system in the world.
	Absolutely flawless.
	Works perfectly.
	No problems.
	Uh, anyway, so our last, uh, booshite of the week, speaking of, uh, stupid fucking white men, uh, Tiki, Tiki Man is dead.
	Tiki Torch guy.
	That's Arizona guy.
	Or kinda.
	He is dead.
	And as soon as Hayley found out that we were going to be talking about that shit, she perked up because, as I mentioned earlier, this is her field of expertise.
	So I'll turn it over to Mike and Hayley to talk about this dead fuck.
	Yeah, his name was Teddy Joseph von Newcomb, which is like, come on.
	Your name is Teddy Joseph von Newcomb?
	That's crazy.
	Okay, I mean, I don't usually like to deadname people, but what was his name before he changed it to that obviously fake name?
	Dead Nazi.
	His name was Dead Nazi.
	That sounds like the sort of name if you were, like, a white Nazi, you might want to change your name to sound sort of like Duke Nukem.
	All right.
	So everybody, can I take it?
	Can I take it from here?
	I know the story.
	Great.
	All right.
	Shout out to Molly Cogner, aka Socialist Dog Mom on Twitter, who broke this news.
	She's great.
	Everybody follow her.
	She's been following the Charlottesville stuff since it happened.
	So anyway, January 30th, Teddy Joseph von Neukom, who people might recognize from the infamous Charlottesville photo of them holding the tiki torches.
	He's literally like the guy right in the center.
	He's in a black shirt and screaming.
	He was really proud of being on every newspaper cover with that.
	After Charlottesville, there was like a pretty violent beating and attempted lynching at Charlottesville that he was definitely involved with.
	So yeah, he was a pretty prominent figure at Charlottesville and he didn't stop there.
	He decided to do some drug running across the Arizona-Mexico border.
	He was running fentanyl.
	I thought he was just a friendly Nazi.
	Why would he be involved in dangerous crime?
	Oh yeah.
	And like, I thought it was only like, you know, brown people that smuggled drugs across the Mexican border.
	You know, that's always the narrative.
	But anyway, was caught.
	It wasn't even like a lot of money.
	He got caught, it was like $280 or pesos worth or something.
	It's like, you're getting charged with a felony for like not that much money.
	So anyway, he was set to face trial finally for that.
	He didn't show on January 30th.
	There was a warrant issued for his arrest and at that moment that he was not, when the warrant was being issued, he was in his shed saying his final goodbye.
	Sad part is he left five kids.
	Hopefully they realize the Don't be a fucking Nazi, because it doesn't pay, and it sucks, and... I guess the moral of the story is try not to be a Nazi.
	Don't be a Nazi.
	If you can help it.
	I mean, it's so easy to become a Nazi, but, like, you should just do a little bit of... take a little bit of effort in your personal life and somehow avoid the pitfalls of becoming a Nazi.
	Yeah, it doesn't usually work out really great.
	So anyway, that's the story of Teddy Joseph von Newcomb.
	Yeah, and traffic fentanyl.
	Don't decide to become a drug mule for a transnational drug cartel and traffic fentanyl across the American border and get pinched for it.
	Doesn't usually work out.
	That also goes really poorly for you.
	Also, just, like, face up to your crimes, man.
	You weren't facing, like, life.
	Like, what?
	You're a white Nazi!
	Our justice system loves you people.
	You could have, like, pled out to something and got a couple years and gone on with your life after that.
	And then you could have- Yeah, just plead to attempted Nazi.
	Yes!
	Or conspiracy to be a Nazi.
	It sucks that he killed himself and left his family behind this way, and I'm sure they're screwed.
	The fact that this guy was going down such a path, it's so wild to me that he was, like, doing that stuff and then He's like, oh, I was the Nazi that was on all these newspapers.
	I'm like this public figure.
	And then he's like, I don't know how to monetize this.
	I need to do small time drug running to subsidize my Nazism.
	So many of these absolute shitheads have found ways to make a buck off of being a terrible person.
	Yeah, it's like that kind of stuff.
	I mean, Gavin McInnes is like, literally, I founded the Proud Boys, which are a terrorist organization, and I still have a podcast.
	Donate to my Patreon.
	It's like, how?
	How are you able to make money legitimately in any way, shape, or form, when you literally founded a terrorist group?
	How the fuck?
	How does that square?
	I mean, it's like, you should never be allowed to have money.
	You should be allowed to be walking free.
	But no, it's fine.
	Meanwhile, How dare you insinuate that that that Caucasian man shouldn't have his money.
	I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
	I forgot where I was in white America.
	In 1950s America.
	The best America.
	Well, since we're talking about how great America is, let's roll into our news segment because the top of our news segment is an incredibly patriotic saying.
	From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's Q's in the News.
	So the big game happened and it was super.
	It pulled me over, etc.
	It was a triumphant clash.
	Between the appropriation of Indigenous culture out of Kansas City versus the symbol of American imperialism out of Philadelphia.
	And racism on the back of the helmets, though, so it's cool.
	Yeah, I mean, like, yeah, we do not abide by racism here at Chiefs Stadium.
	Now everyone do your loudest tomahawk chop in appreciation of Indigenous culture!
	It was definitely a choice that the NFL made when they cut to the group of Chiefs fans from Germany and had the German people waving their arms frantically in celebration of the Chiefs.
	It was just like, whoa, wait a minute!
	German people, you're not allowed to use your arms that way!
	There's rules!
	Stop!
	Stop, German people!
	No!
	No!
	Yeah, I mean, that seems like doubling it in a stadium full of things that people are doing stuff with their arms that they should not be doing.
	Because, again, as a child, for a time, I lived in Georgia, and the one and only professional baseball game I ever went to as a child, or ever, was to see the Atlanta Braves.
	And they gave me a little plastic tomahawk, and we did that chant a lot.
	And I was like, wow, what good fun.
	And then, also, when I lived there, I remember I got a small commemorative thing from the Confederacy Museum and also thought nothing of it until I got to high school age and I was reflecting upon my younger years and I was just like, oh wow, Georgia!
	It's just like they said it was.
	I just didn't know because I was deep in the shit.
	Anyway, yeah, that shit's racist.
	And, like, come on guys, get with it.
	I mean, I understand that you're in the middle of the country or whatever, but, like, you know, Kansas City's kind of a real city.
	Like, you probably shouldn't be that openly racist.
	Let's maybe less a little bit on the racism.
	A skosh, just smidge.
	Yes.
	Just keep the name, but make yourself police-themed.
	Like, you'll still be able to, like, rub it in the- Oh my god!
	You'll still be able to rub it in liberals' faces because, like, you probably don't like them, uh, and they don't like the police, but you can get away from, like, the inherent racism of the name being what it is now.
	Yeah, you can be the Kansas City Police Chiefs, you can flip your uniforms to blue, you can have, like, the Blue Lives Matter flag on the 50-yard line, you'll still own libs, but you'll be doing it to back the blue and support the troops!
	Yeah, you can have, like, the nightstick chop or whatever.
	Yes!
	That's probably the only way that we can successfully change the mascot of the Chiefs, is if we make it a police symbol of police brutality.
	Yeah, dude, and you've got the money to get somebody to make like a logo or like a caricature or whatever of that for like, you know, this is Chief Chief or whatever, and he is a white guy.
	I can't stress this enough.
	Don't be tempted.
	Like you just keep it a white guy to make sure that there's no question as to what like I mean,
	you know, normally you'd want to represent a different color if you could, but in this
	instance I feel like you just want to make sure his name is Chief Patty McIrish and he's Caucasian.
	So beyond the problematic nature of our Super Bowl champions name,
	We'll see you next time.
	We also had a bunch of nonsense going on around the Super Bowl.
	The first of these things is the now yearly freakout in the pregame show.
	Where before the Super Bowl, they have the song Lift Every Voice and Sing be played.
	And this is literally, this is just a song.
	But back in the day, it was called the Black National Anthem by the NAACP.
	And so now it gets reported as being that.
	And so All these right-wing people who live only to be outraged and offended are like, there's only one National Anthem!
	I don't know nothing about no Black National Anthem!
	Trying to divide America by race, and I'm so upset about it!
	Did you see Carrie posted?
	She's like, herself sitting.
	Even though it wasn't, because you could see the TV in the background, and it was like commercials playing at that moment, but she was like, I'm not standing for the Black National Anthem.
	We only have one American Anthem.
	Yeah, but again, these same people love a Confederate flag, which is literally the Literally the flag of another nation or an attempted other
	nation.
	These people, like, you know, they'll move the goalposts in any orientation they need
	to to avoid just saying, yo, we don't like it when people that are not white are doing
	a thing.
	We don't like it.
	We do not like it when they are having fun or just living their lives.
	We hate it so much.
	Yeah.
	And my favorite part about that Carrie photo is there's a guy behind her sitting also.
	Like literally, it's just... He's also a sick patriot.
	He knows what's up.
	Yeah.
	It's so ridiculous because she's sitting on like basically kind of like stadium seats that are like kind of the cheap seats.
	And there's a guy behind her who's at a bar, who's like in a box seat in a bar.
	And he's sitting down, there's a woman next to him sitting down at the bar.
	Like no one is standing in this photo.
	So even if like, you were supposed to stand for the Black National Anthem, which I don't think was a request that was made.
	I have no idea if it was or not.
	But I've never heard anyone being told to stand for Lift Every Voice and Sing.
	Now stand for your Black National Anthem!
	So there was a giant to-do about that.
	There was all this rending of garments and freaking out and people getting all kinds of upset about that.
	That probably got her the VP, honestly.
	It might have, it might have.
	Carrie Lake standing up to woke, woke bullshit.
	Oh, yeah.
	Carrie Lake, she's standing up by sitting down.
	Yeah.
	So that all happened, but then- Imagine if I was using my powers for evil.
	Oh god, grifting is so easy.
	It's just this whole thing about having any morals or compassion that just like keeps people away from it.
	You can just like- That shit sucks, I want to shut that part- Can I shut that part of myself off for like a decade to just stack a bunch of cash and then become a better person later in life?
	Yeah, I know, it's like- Can I see a hypnotist that's just like, make me, I want like a liar liar style situation where I go under this hypnosis and you just make me a bad person for like a decade and then like 10 years from now you're gonna say rutabaga to me and I'm just gonna be a good millionaire.
	You get to actually do the fake Glenn Beck redemption arc, but you actually do it where you do apologize and you do change your stripes.
	You don't go on the Glenn Beck apology tour and then like a week later be like, ah, fuck, I ain't making any money!
	Time to be QAnon!
	Boom!
	Did it!
	Make it rain!
	Let's get this Black Mirror episode going.
	Yes.
	Because this doesn't sound like it would end well.
	Probably not, but no way!
	In all of those Jim Carrey movies, it always ended great.
	Yes.
	So, beyond the pregame festivities that got everyone all upset and angry, we had to have our Super Bowl halftime show, aka America's tribute to Moloch.
	Yeah, if you were awake for it.
	I mean, like, don't get me wrong, under normal circumstances, I love Mia Rihanna, but as I said in my group chat with my friends, Rihanna, like, pregnant Rihanna brought pregnant lady energy, and that's not what I'm looking for in a Super Bowl halftime show.
	And I get it, you're pregnant, like, and don't worry, I understand, but at the same time, like, that doesn't mean it was any better.
	It's freaking hilarious how many people freaked out about it still, though.
	Oh yeah, there were people in white suits dancing around in red lights on platforms that looked like Final Destination.
	A joke that is totally original to me.
	Nobody else looked at that and immediately thought Super Smash Brothers.
	That was just L. Yes!
	Oh yeah, Super Smash Brothers, and then all the satanic stuff because there was a lot of red involved.
	She grabbed her bum.
	It's MAGA!
	Yes.
	Oh, that's red MAGA!
	So is this like an Antichrist thing?
	Is that their angle on it?
	Because if not, it should be.
	Some red is okay.
	Some red is not okay.
	Right.
	Liberal red is bad.
	MAGA red and red states are good.
	That's how this works.
	It's Calvin Ball.
	Whatever we say is the new rules of the game.
	And So you had everyone there was a lot of Illuminati stuff and basically she's wearing red and she's dancing sexy and this is evil and bad and she's
	And there were a bunch of camera angles where the platforms were situated in certain ways where you could, if you wanted to really work hard at it, you could come up with an upside down cross.
	There was material there.
	It wasn't as bad as Katy Perry.
	Katy Perry got the gold standard for Illuminati symbolism and a halftime show to freak these people out with.
	But she was definitely more evil than Lady Gaga, because they were all waiting for Lady Gaga to do some shit.
	But all of Lady Gaga's stagecraft was very boring.
	I watched so many Illuminati videos after the Lady Gaga Halftime Show, and it was so funny.
	They were like, now she's a thing, and I don't know about that, but I don't like it.
	Probably bad.
	And it was wild how no material she gave them.
	I haven't delved into the Rihanna Halftime Show Illuminati deep dives, but I'm sure they're out there.
	Why?
	Whoa, that's what you're supposed to be doing.
	Hips moving.
	Mike, let me pull you aside for a second.
	Mike, that's what you're supposed to be doing for the podcast, man.
	I know!
	This is my first day off from my day job.
	I'm getting cracking, I promise.
	Mike, just watch it on your phone at your day job.
	Oh, right.
	I'm sorry.
	I'm sorry.
	Absolutely should be doing that.
	Yes, I'll get on that.
	Okay.
	All right.
	Sorry, Hayley.
	I had to pull Mike aside real quick to remind him.
	Don't you throw cards?
	I'm a supervisor right now, so I watch other people throw cards.
	So could you?
	If I wanted to get in trouble, I couldn't do such things.
	He's supposed to be levitating over them with telekinetic powers, like just bearing down on the dealers and making sure that they're not doing anything awry.
	Yeah, I'm supposed to be like Nick Cage at the end of that trailer for the new movie he's doing where he's Dracula.
	I'm supposed to be hovering ominously above the room making sure that all my dealers are writing their P's and Q's.
	Wow, how is it possible that you managed to not see the Rihanna thing but you managed to see this Redfield trailer?
	You're full of surprises, Mike!
	I saw the Redfield trailer a few weeks ago.
	It just lingered in your brain?
	You were just like, this is going to be my back pocket Redfield reference.
	Yes.
	One never knows what sticks in my dumb brain.
	Well done, mate.
	I mean, hey.
	I mean, at the very least, it's entertaining.
	I'm entertained.
	Thank you.
	Thank you.
	I don't know if the audience is entertained, but fuck them.
	You know my policy on our audience?
	Fuck those clowns.
	Don't worry, Booble Babies, I love you.
	Hayley's cold indifference to our maniacal chuckling is probably the audience's reaction as well.
	Just, oh my god.
	So all of that happened, and then the final fun thing in the Super Bowl was a few weeks ago, I forget, I think it was Arian Foster, but some NFL former player made a joke about how, oh yeah, before every season, the NFL gives us a script that tells us what's going to happen, the whole thing's rigged and staged, And a lot of people took this guy seriously.
	A lot of people were just like, oh yeah, this guy means it.
	NFL rigged.
	It's all like WWE.
	So some morons decided to get QAnon all jeeped up.
	And they posted what they said was a screen grab of the script leaking for the Super Bowl.
	In that leaked script, the Philadelphia Eagles won 37-34.
	So they tweaked the script slightly.
	We were on their tail.
	They knew that we were on their tail, so they called an audible.
	You can't see the pinky, but the pinky is going up to the mouth to indicate a cheeky ref.
	So they called an audible, and they were like, how about we just do something wildly different?
	Yes, and the Chiefs won 38-35.
	It's like improv.
	That's a lot of choreo to throw in the garbage.
	Yes!
	It's just like, okay, so because we want it to look natural, you guys are just going to have to actually play a little football tonight, sorry.
	Oh man, I'm not trained for this!
	I didn't study dance for six years at Juilliard for this!
	Exactly!
	Yeah, so both pregame, halftime, and full game were all Illuminati conspiracy theories.
	100% confirmed.
	It's all facts.
	Please donate to my Patreon for the hidden truth.
	So if you love dissecting Super Bowl for conspiracy theories, then the Super Bowl is the Super Bowl of conspiracy theories.
	Yes!
	So dumb.
	Like, you get your friends together, nice big party, like, oh, your wife's just like, oh, there's my husband, he's just doing his annual Super Bowl party, me and him and the guys, they sure do love the Super Bowl.
	But I don't care about sports, so I'm gonna fuck off.
	And then as soon as she's out of the room, everybody pulls out their, like, cork board with their, like, strings and their, like, black and white magazine pictures cut out and tagged to it.
	And that's my pitch for a MADtv sketch.
	Yes.
	Thank you.
	Matt TV, come back.
	You were the hip alternative to SNL.
	Did you see those Jesus commercials?
	No, I haven't seen shit from this.
	I skipped the big game entirely.
	Jesus bought some advertising.
	I thought it was interesting.
	I heard that people were pissed off about it because they spent like $60 million advertising Jesus.
	It's going to be a $100 million campaign.
	It's actually like this super far-right Christian fund that is making the commercials because they're also giving away free t-shirts, hats, and stickers.
	I totally ordered some.
	How many converts do you need to make that?
	Are there bean counters?
	What is the human soul worth, right?
	You're just like, hey, we're going to spend $100 million in outreach to spread the word about the Lord.
	Ads.
	Just ads.
	How much do you expect that to bring in?
	If you convert 10,000 people, is that good?
	Is that a good dollar to soul ratio for the church?
	That's a good point, because I saw a lot of other Christian right groups being like, this is wrong.
	You're not supposed to advertise Jesus, even though they advertise Jesus.
	Is it?
	Wait a minute.
	There are people out there who think that Christianity is not to be shared?
	This is the point of Christianity.
	Yeah, I saw a lot of gatekeeping talk from other Christian groups that are trying to make money off of Jesus.
	I'm like, this is funny.
	Jesus capitalism is funny.
	I think, right, even the weird version, what is it, I can't remember which version it is, but even the weird version where space and heaven is limited, I think that they're still supposed to be out there getting you on board.
	Yeah.
	They're just like, hey, just so you know, space and heaven is limited, but you should still probably join the club, but then maybe you're going to heaven, I don't know.
	You're definitely not making it if you're not part of the club.
	I think that's Calvinism.
	I'm sure someone will correct me, but yeah, it's one of those.
	Anyway, uh, yeah, that's the idea that there are people out there that would be like, I understand that in principle, you should be outraged because it's just like, how do they have this much money to just throw around?
	Like that's a lot of cash.
	You know, the group, you know, the, the, you know, the, the legal group that like is involved with the, the, the cake guy, the gay cake guy, uh, masterpiece cakes.
	He wanted, he didn't want to bake a cake for a gay couple guy.
	We know him, yes.
	Yeah, and they back that legal group, and that's the same legal group that helped bring down Roe and kind of targets abortion rights in every state.
	It's like a massive Christian right fund.
	I looked at their tax stuff, and they made over a billion dollars last year.
	Yeah, but I would expect that some of that money would be spent on pro-Jesus outreach.
	Oh, definitely.
	They give a lot to churches and all the anti-choice stuff.
	As long as they're doing the stuff that Christians are supposed to be doing, I don't want to see any of those preachers flashing that cash.
	Even if you are wealthy, you be quiet about it.
	I don't want to think about how much money you're making there, preacher man.
	But if the church is just like, yeah, we donated a hundred million dollars to these charities last year, we did a hundred million dollar, like, marketing campaign to get Jesus back in people's, like, house again.
	It's just like, okay, you're a church.
	I would expect that that's where your money's going.
	So to be outraged over that is just hilarious.
	Conservatives, they just want to be pissed off about shit just as much as hyper-liberals do, you know what I mean?
	They're always just like, oh, fucking trans people, they're just always complaining because they're all liberal, they just want to complain.
	And it's just like, all anybody wants to do is fucking complain, dude.
	But it turns out that some people have a better case than others.
	So start your trap.
	Yeah, that's really what it comes down to.
	That's what always makes me laugh about these people.
	They're like, oh, you triggered much lib?
	And I'm like, I look at your timeline, and all your timeline is is you're mad about everything.
	You live perpetually triggered, and all you can do is like scream out, oh no, you're triggered!
	It's like, you're the one who's red in the face and has high blood pressure.
	Yeah, anyone who's ever used the phrase war on Christmas thought, ironically, you don't get to talk about being triggered.
	That's the most triggered thing I've ever heard of in my life.
	Yeah.
	It seems like every year Christmas seems a little bit bigger.
	It seems like Christmas is bigger than ever.
	But everyone's just like, we're on Christmas.
	Go fuck yourself.
	Anyway, now we're in the weeds of just talking about conservatives.
	It's so easy.
	But unfortunately, we do have to talk about a terrible thing that more people should be talking about.
	Kind of fucking weird that more people are talking about this.
	The massive train derailment slash chemical leak slash chemical fire that is turning a portion of Ohio into, like, Mike, tell us about this year's train derailment slash train fire.
	your enjoy your delicious. Yeah, I mean, it's only gonna get
	worse from here. So for more actual information related to this, I'll toss it over to Mike. Mike, tell us about this
	year trade derailment slash trade fire.
	So this train derailment happened a while ago. And it is like, pretty much the story of it is the fact that Ohio has
	created this sort of hellscape of deregulation, and just caving to these train companies.
	Big train has a lot of power here.
	And so this thing's happened and we have, we have all these people like blaming Biden and claiming that, oh, like this is Buttigieg's wrongdoing.
	Like they're evil and bad and the government's destroying the world.
	But when you look at what's actually happened, there is some really scary shit on the books in Ohio, a state that's run by Republicans.
	This is like from many years ago, like I believe like in 2017, a What I believe is a Democrat legislator posted a thing where he said, let me give you a scenario.
	You and your team get called to an emergency scene.
	You have basic information of what occurred.
	When you get there, it looks like a bomb just went off.
	You see coal black smoke just rolling up the hill.
	There appears to be lines of fire spread across several acres as well as you approach.
	You notice you coming up to the site, there were explosives at the site and as the fire burns nearby.
	So you're dealing with all this shit.
	It is possible that when you get there, you could be like, hey, what chemicals am I dealing with?
	I need to know what's going on here.
	And you can be told those chemicals are a trade secret of the company that had this fire happen to their property.
	We can't tell you what chemicals it was.
	And this happened in 2014, when a stat oil chemical fire happened on a well pad in Clarington, Ohio.
	So like, these are the actual laws in Ohio right now where you can be a first responder, and you don't even get to know what fucking shit you're walking into because the corporations don't have to tell you what sort of fucking toxins you're going to be breathing in for the next half hour or so before you eventually walk away because your lungs are burning.
	So Like this is about, um, this is again about basically these railroad companies having all this money and having Republicans in their back pocket and all that kind of stuff.
	And it's led to this real disaster where now, uh, because a Democrat's the president, it's like, blame him!
	He's the one who did it.
	It's not us.
	It's, it's him.
	He's, he's the bad guy.
	So it's really hilarious that this is the kind of danger that we're dealing with.
	Because fucking rich people need to make a buck!
	That's really all there is to it.
	Yeah, so now we have these five tanker cars filled with this chemical that is leaking into the earth and also being burned off.
	Because burning something just makes it go away.
	You just burn it away with fire.
	It just goes away immediately.
	which, you know, like apropos of nothing, I guess, you know, coincidentally then,
	there's also this huge fucking like perpetual mushroom cloud
	just rising above this town and all these fish and cattle are dying nearby,
	don't worry about it.
	And yeah, so we have this disaster that is happening and, you know, like an excuse,
	like it seems like it would be a pretty good time for people to start talking about regulation
	and all this and that, But unfortunately, this isn't really getting a ton of
	coverage.
	Certainly not the amount of coverage you would expect for some sort of like, you know, if this was like a nuclear power plant meltdown or something, everybody would be losing their freaking minds, but what we have here is like a slow chemical burn-off that is turning into a giant noxious cloud that will rain acid upon this community in Ohio and further communities beyond for a while, no big deal.
	And that's not including the stuff that did get burned off that did make its way into the ground or whatever.
	And this is going to keep happening because our infrastructure is failing at a pretty rapid rate.
	This wasn't the only incident to happen.
	And yesterday in Arizona there was a nitric acid spill.
	Fun.
	Yeah, they had to clear out a neighborhood because it was in the air.
	Have they considered burning it?
	Just lighting it up?
	No, I think they just considered, like, letting the people pass through it.
	They're just like, drive through.
	It's fine.
	Yeah.
	I mean, you're in a car.
	Whatever.
	Who cares?
	They're airtight.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Which is why if you're worried about the acid, you could just drive it into your nearest, like, body of water and just clean it off real good.
	Then just drive right out again.
	So the other thing that Elle has brought up here about the coverage of this is that there is media coverage of it.
	But now what has also been happening is that there are lunatics that are covering this from a, like, just an apocalyptic frame of reference.
	We have people now just basically making shit up about what's going on.
	hopefully I mean, there definitely needs to be like, actual like federal investigations of what's going
	on. And I hope the mainstream media digs into this more.
	But we have people like Stu Peters, who I've talked about
	previously on this podcast, was a was the guy who said that he
	have inside sources to say to Mark Hamlin is brain dead in the
	hospital. And we have and he's behind died suddenly. He's one
	of the guys promoting that fucking movie. And Stu is also a Nazi.
	He was at AmericaFest.
	He was at Nick Fuentes' AmericaFest.
	He was a speaker.
	He's like a white replacement guy.
	Yeah, he's an absolute sack of shit.
	So if you or anyone you know sees anything by him, don't think for a moment that he's on the level.
	Because what these people are trying to do is they're trying to present themselves as There's this other guy, Krakatoa, or whatever his name is.
	in Ohio that no one's giving the proper coverage to in the hopes
	of like, Oh my God, this guy's a straight shooter. He's telling
	it like it is. And then he can lure you into the Nazism because
	like, well, he's right about the Ohio trade derailment. He's got
	me right about other things too, right. And he got retweeted or
	he got he got Elon to reply guy him. There's this other guy Krakatoa, I can't or whatever his name is. He's the
	Hawaiian election denier. He is now also literally his entire
	existence before this Ohio thing was just like the rigged election,
	going over all this shit.
	And then he jumped into Ohio too, and he also got a reply from Elon.
	So you have a lot of right-wing absolute pieces of shit trying to rebrand themselves as investigative journalists who are sussing out the truth about what's going on in Ohio.
	And it's like, Don't believe these people.
	They don't have sources.
	They don't know what they're talking about.
	They're just making it up.
	I saw like some account that was like Ohio falconry or something.
	And they were talking about, oh man, Ohio's gonna, everyone's gonna die.
	And it's like, you're also lying.
	Like just, this is bad.
	Like this is a terrible thing and we're going to have to get to the bottom of it, but I don't trust you to do it.
	Is basically the point of what I'm trying to say here is that there's a bunch of people trying to make a buck off this shit.
	And like, be ready for it and be ready to like, see that for what it is.
	Also, like, like, because I see a lot of like, yeah, like not right wing people sharing Stu Peters because he's kind of not being his normal self and like, really toning it down and being just like, what is going on?
	You know, like, Clearly trying to kind of lure people in because that is not his normal tone.
	And then like once you're lured in his kind of narrative has as well as like Charlie Kirk and a couple other figures there was a neo-nazi group that went out there and provided aid propaganda. They're taking it and like using this kind
	of opportunity to spread like a, this is anti-white racism.
	Yeah, the Biden administration crashed this truck in Ohio full
	of white people. Again, the great replacement. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
	Well, I mean, God, they're having a field day with this one, because originally it was balloons that shot them down, right?
	Because the original derailment happened in the wake of the first balloon.
	Which is funny, because I think we touched upon it lightly during the podcast, like as a joke, not realizing all the chemical-related stuff that was going on, because again, this is one of those rare instances where it's just like, I'm still glad that Twitter is around, because if not for Twitter, I wouldn't know shit about this situation.
	I just haven't really seen a ton of coverage on AP News or whatever, and I haven't gone digging for it, but Twitter put it in my face.
	It was like, look at what's going on!
	I was like, oh my god!
	That seems pretty serious!
	Yeah, exactly.
	So, good on you, Twitter.
	I'm glad that you still exist, for the time being, until anything better comes along, and then I will abandon you.
	And until Elon makes you pay eight bucks to have a block list, because Elon must be heard!
	And if you don't want to hear Elon, you gotta give Elon money.
	You didn't hear what I have to say!
	Go birds!
	That's what Philadelphia Eagle fans say, right?
	I'm hip!
	That'd be great.
	And then, truly, at some point, just because he'd be hemorrhaging cash, he'd be bought and paid for, right?
	So he'd just be like, man, I love Starbucks coffee!
	Starbucks is so good!
	Starbucks copyright is so great!
	Oh, God, he did that!
	He, like, friggin', uh, he replied, guys, like a Doritos ad and, like, a car ad.
	Like, he was literally like, hey, Doritos, if you do an ad on my, uh, website, I'll reply, guys, and try to get you more engagement.
	I was like, oh, my God.
	He's now a door greeter at Walmart.
	He's the saddest human being ever.
	Well, we already talked about his dumb ass this week, so... Yeah, fuck him.
	Let's move on to our next news segment.
	I could have segued into it, but then I decided not to, because we wanted to take some more shots at Elon Musk, because of course we did.
	But it's time to talk about balloon fever.
	I mean, America still has balloon fever, and as we all know from that hilarious Will Ferrell bit about Cowbell, the only cure is more balloons.
	So that's what we've been getting.
	Lots and lots of more balloons.
	So what is going on with balloon madness, Mike?
	I wasn't here last week to do a balloon talk.
	So America and Canada shot down more balloons over America, which really kind of made the question, why are we now doing this so aggressively?
	Well, some of them weren't balloons.
	Washington Post reported yesterday that some of them weren't balloons.
	Also, we missed one.
	We shot.
	We missed.
	Oh, oh, I saw so many comments.
	Yeah, so when it comes to the balloon stuff, I actually did hear, like, I did, like, a little bit of my own research into this.
	So, yes, I did hear about the, like, how, like, jets were scrambled, balloon was downed, and then the fighters triumphantly returned, and they had fired two of these Sidewinder missiles for their jet.
	Uh, which means that either one of them wasn't enough to get the job done against this weird balloon, or somebody missed... I think the TikTok video I said, like, said, quote, missed their free, like, balloon kill, or whatever.
	Like, made it to whiff on a free balloon kill.
	Way to not get your ribbon, idiot.
	Oh, I saw some hilarious misogyny about, like, oh, that all-woman flyover makes sense as we miss that balloon, because apparently a female pilot can't press a button and shoot a rocket in a balloon and blow it up.
	That's beyond what a lady's capable of doing, or something.
	Well, some of the people who have been flying near these balloons have, like, reported experiencing, like, trouble with their Uh, you know, onboard equipment.
	Uh, I wonder who started that.
	Uh, who started that rumor?
	May have been the guy who missed the missile shot.
	It's just like, yeah, it was so weird.
	I got close to it and, uh, you know, I was flying blind.
	But, you know, I just, you know, I tried to, I tried to eyeball it and I whiffed.
	They were saying that, like, the fucking F-35s, those giant money sinks that we've wasted so much money on, that, like, F-35 pilots are saying their shit's getting fried, so then they have F-22s, which are, like, the older model, they come in and actually do the kill, so it's like, oh my god, like, really?
	We've spent, like, I don't know, like, a trillion dollars on these fucking planes, and they can't even knock down balloons.
	It's really impressive.
	Also, my plane guy just, while we're recording, sent me this hilarious update from the Air Force.
	The tanker that's up there with them to refuel, has the Air Force just ordered them to be inspected because there's a possible defection that could cause the tail to fly off mid-flight.
	Yeah, this was flying over the Super Bowl.
	We had the same, like, stuff flying over the Super Bowl.
	Oh my gosh.
	Oh my god, it could have killed Rihanna.
	It could have killed Elon, he was there too.
	That's what makes Smash Bros.
	fun though, stage hazards and stuff.
	You know, sometimes the big flaming tail wreckage crashes on the football field stage and you just get biffed.
	We would have just gotten an actual Dark Knight Rises scene, we just would have had Bane blow up the stadium.
	Anyway, yeah, so the story as I've been told via the internet is that apparently, like, We upgraded our radar filtration stuff or whatever and then suddenly we're just detecting a higher level of these balloons that are shaped weird because previously that allowed them to evade detection.
	So you'll get like Oxygon Balloon or whatever and it's just like, it's like shapes are weird, what's going on?
	It's just like it was shaped that way to avoid radar detection.
	And on top of that, that's reality.
	That's like the story that we're hearing from normal sane people, the insane reality people, the QAnon people.
	They think that this is Biden slowly working his way into admitting that there are aliens.
	It's true.
	We're working our way up to Area 51.
	There's no shooting down balloons, brother.
	No.
	Welcome to Earth, is basically where we're at here.
	You got a nice American hello.
	Yes.
	Look, I mean, in this instance, every once in a while, they have one that I want to believe in.
	So yeah, I mean, that would clearly be much cooler if it was just like, yeah, hey, guess what?
	Aliens are real.
	Because again, you would imagine, or at least you would fucking hope, that if aliens were real, and we had definitive proof that they were monitoring us or sending crafts to do stuff to our planet, that humanity could rally around to be like, hey, maybe instead of fighting each other, we should prepare to fight aliens, because that seems like it's going to be pretty tough.
	No, let them take us, please.
	I mean, that's what I want.
	But I'm a weirdo.
	All I want is upload.
	If an alien showed up and was just like, hey, we want your planet's resources, would you like us to put you in a computer?
	I'd be like, yeah, immediately.
	Take all of our platinum or whatever you want.
	Whatever weird thing it is that you want from Earth, it's yours.
	You have it.
	Take it.
	Don't care.
	I love the Mario alien overlords.
	Yeah, absolutely.
	I mean, I don't want to be, like, actually enslaved.
	Like, I don't want to be, like, pushing bricks around for some reason just, like, because they think it's funny to make us do it.
	But, uh, you know, like, I would happily bend the knee to benevolent aliens.
	They're just like, hey, you guys have been fucking up, so we're taking over.
	I'd be like, yes.
	Perfect.
	Do that please.
	No problem.
	Well done!
	Yeah.
	Please take our nukes off our hands.
	Please settle the whole religious dispute thing.
	Whatever you want, aliens.
	You're calling the shots now.
	It's all good.
	Yeah, I don't know.
	It just seems like fighting back would be such a hassle.
	I'm just like the perfect... You let them do it for a while, you know?
	Yeah, I'm just such a sub when it comes to Alien Daddy Dom.
	He shows up and he's just like, I'm way more advanced than you, and I'm just like, cool, you win.
	I'm fast to concede.
	I don't like to grind out those one percenters.
	I'll just fucking snap.
	I'll snap it up.
	All my cards back into one pile.
	Yep, done.
	I fold.
	You win.
	Take the pot.
	It's yours.
	You got it.
	Yep.
	Okay, so I would love to continue talking about the potential existence of aliens, because God, wouldn't that be cool?
	But instead, we have to talk about something much less cool than is our weekly ritual, and that is we have to talk about Donald Trump, at least briefly.
	So, Mike, what does Trump have for us this week?
	Well, Trump had a giant hissy fit at Rihanna because Rihanna doesn't like him.
	And he was like, Rihanna sucks and she's bad, she's gonna have a terrible halftime show.
	And then apparently Trump wanted people to watch the Super Bowl so that we could see Rihanna fail to give a good halftime show or something.
	And a lot of QAnon people were like, Trump, I've given up on the NFL ever since they let Colin Kaepernick disrespect America by taking a knee.
	If Daddy Trump wants me to watch the Bowl, I'll do it.
	I'll grit my teeth and watch him football.
	And until that all happened, and Trump whined about Rihanna's halftime show sucking, because it's his life, and He also has decided to continuously screech out that he is being prosecuted unfairly, that it's a witch hunt against him, because our boy Mike Pence got a subpoena to testify before Jack Smith.
	Dark Jack, or whatever we're calling him, because we're crazy liberals who like to make memes about people.
	Smith is coming, and all that shit.
	Basically, Trump's getting mad because it looks like all these cases against him are slowly moving towards actually something happening.
	While that was all going on, we had news reports that Trump had commissioned a group to find out how the 2020 election had been stolen from him.
	And the group came back to him and was like, it was not stolen from you.
	You lost fair and square.
	We've checked everything.
	We looked for every possible way you could have gotten ripped off and it didn't happen.
	We're sorry, Donnie.
	You just lost.
	And Trump was like, fuck you.
	And he just buried the report because you're not allowed to tell that man that he lost legitimately.
	So yeah, he's been having a good one.
	I believe you mean to say you're not allowed to lie to that man that he lost legitimately.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	You may only tell him the truth, that he is still the president.
	Yes, he's still the shadow president.
	Don't worry.
	Don't worry.
	Don't worry, pal.
	You're still the president.
	Everybody respects your authority.
	Yeah, you're the greatest.
	You're truly the greatest of all of us, Donnie.
	You can nuke a China whenever you want to there, big guy.
	Or a hurricane, or whatever you want.
	Just throw nukes wherever.
	Just fucking do them.
	It's great.
	I mean, but there's no evidence saying that a nuke wouldn't stop a hurricane.
	This is true.
	It is possible.
	It is possible you could nuke a hurricane in this emission.
	What a clown.
	Obviously.
	Obviously he's such a clown.
	But, you know, at least he, like Elon, is a gift that keeps on giving.
	Man, we could siphon an unlimited amount of content out of these jokers.
	Yes.
	Maybe at some point Elon will bleed enough cash where he will be, like, actually desperate enough to actually have to join forces with Donald Trump.
	That'll be great.
	If they can get some other rich goon in the mix, we could fuse them all together into some sort of horrible chimera.
	It'd be great.
	Oh, God.
	I just love that there was that moment where Elon reactivated Trump's account and then was just begging Trump to repost on Twitter.
	Please, Donnie, please post on Twitter.
	With that horny meme out, you know?
	Like, fuck me!
	Yeah, he posted the temptress trying to get the priest to give in to the temptations of the flesh.
	If he was smart, he would've negged Trump.
	He would've been like, yeah, I've reactivated Donald Trump's account, but he's too much of a weak pussy to ever post on Twitter again.
	Oh yeah, oh god, Trump would've- DeSantis posts on Twitter.
	Yeah, it just has the fucking sack and big meaty root to post on Twitter.
	But what about Donald Trump?
	He hides in his walled garden with his no followers over on True Social.
	Donald Trump, it does not seem like he is strong-willed enough to not take the bait on reverse psychology.
	I'm just gonna say it.
	He seems like a dingus that would fall for that immediately.
	Oh, absolutely.
	Dude, I'll show you!
	Oh, I'll post on Twitter so much you won't even believe it!
	Yeah, God.
	Anyway, speaking of folks on Twitter, that's where we solicit questions for our mailbag, so let's get to it.
	Our listeners got questions, we got answers.
	It's time for Q and A. Sorry, I'm going to interrupt you real quick for breaking news.
	Getting photos from Sarge from the parade, and it looks boring.
	Boring confirmed.
	Looks like just any old parade.
	Is anyone on a poll?
	I don't believe so.
	According to these photos and videos, it would appear that Sarge is some amount of distance away from these gentlemen who are professional football players.
	And those professional football players appear to be drinking and smoking, again, at some distance from Sarge.
	Oh look, there it is.
	There's the superb owl trophy, named from Falco Lombardi, I believe.
	And it is also at a distance.
	It looks pretty small.
	But I believe that if you were closer to it, it would actually be pretty impressive.
	Anyway, parades are dumb and I hate them.
	Breaking news!
	I also got a photo from Mike and it's a dog in a tie.
	Yes, that is one of our questions that we will be getting to.
	Your visual cue.
	Our first question is from Confidently Befuddled.
	This is the cutest dog.
	What world leader do you guys think, what world leader do you guys individually, you could take in a fight?
	All of them.
	I don't know about that.
	I think that Trudeau would probably be able to kick our asses.
	Trudeau's pretty in shape.
	Nah.
	I don't know.
	I don't know the stats on a lot of them, but I feel like for sure Sleepy Joe, he's just over 80.
	I'm not sure if there's any person over 80 that I don't think I could take in a fight or whatever.
	He's just like... How old is he actually?
	He's not really over 80.
	I think he's... He's like 70X?
	No, he's 80.
	He's 80 on the dot.
	Is he?
	My god.
	Holy crap.
	I remember basically they said that if he actually served the full eight years, he'd leave the office at age 86.
	Sweet Christmas.
	And I mean, hey, look, if you want to get your jollies by sending me pictures or whatever of octogenariads that you think could take me, that's fine.
	But I don't think Joe Biden's one of them.
	No.
	But I'm sure there are a bunch of world leaders I think that could kick my ass.
	But I like my odds against most of them.
	Like, I just don't have enough knowledge, right?
	Like, what am I gonna do to be like, yeah, I can take all of them, and it's just like, okay, well, currently, the Democratic Republic of Congo is, like, under actual control by this warlord who was, like, a former fucking, like, Special Forces officer or whatever.
	I'm just like, okay, well, maybe not that guy, you know?
	Yeah, there's a country in Africa that's actually run by Killmonger, and it's like, oh shit, oh no, can't fuck with that guy, yeah.
	But yeah, most of... I would say I get Biden and... I'll just go with the big two.
	I could definitely take Biden and Putin in a fight, because I mean... I mean, now that Putin's got blood cancer and it seems like just standing is pain, I feel like I might be able to get... Like, Putin in his prime?
	Probably not.
	Like, I'm weak and doughy, but that guy's got blood cancer now, and that's a serious force multiplier on my behalf.
	Yeah, I mean, Putin was a KGB trained spy.
	So he had all that kind of training and shit.
	So he obviously, in his day could have taken people in a fight.
	But now not.
	I mean, now that moon faced... He's soft.
	Yeah, he's very soft.
	He is.
	Well, we have called ourselves the soft boys on the podcast previously.
	But yeah, Vladdy Daddy is a very soft boy.
	And we believe that we could take him in a tussle where push comes to shove.
	And you know what?
	I'm calling you out, Trudeau.
	I like my chances.
	Let's meet you in the ring.
	Let's do this.
	Yeah.
	Cleodora Silvestri, the Hellworld's Great Inquisitor, asks, Trump, Ron DeSantis, and Ron Watkins walking together into a bar.
	In what order are they thrown out, and for what offense does it happen?
	Ron gets thrown out first, because it's Ron.
	I mean, come on.
	It's Ron.
	As in Watkins, not DeMeeple, or whatever his nickname is now.
	That was one of my favorite things.
	People were so happy with Trump that he came up with a good nickname for DeSantis.
	DeMeatball?
	Yeah, Meatball Ron.
	Meatball Ron, okay.
	DeMeatball.
	They were like, we did it!
	John and TwoScoops did it!
	He came up with a nickname that isn't really bad and weird and weak.
	Well, I mean, it does still, it definitely still sucks.
	It's not clever.
	No, it's really not.
	I love how he just set the bar so low for himself that, like, just, you know, just being like, yeah, you know, he looks like meat, but like, if he was just like, it's all sandwich rod, everybody would just be like, okay, I've heard worse.
	Ron DeStinky!
	Say that one.
	Yeah.
	How about Ron DeSandwich, am I right?
	Yeah, that's fuckin' so dumb.
	But, again, just another instance where Ron DeSantis has decided that he is just too cowardly to attack Trump's many, many flaws and just try to become the new alpha male of the Republican Party.
	So instead he's just gonna fuckin' sit there, roll over, and let Trump just call him Meatball Ron.
	So dumb.
	So that's actually how I imagine this scenario plays out.
	Ron Watkins gets thrown out for being a sloppy drunk who can't handle his booze.
	Watching porn.
	Also on his phone.
	Definitely.
	Or making a pass at underage girls outside.
	Just being like, yeah, I think I can sneak you out.
	He brought his anime doll in.
	I can sneak you alcohol.
	And then they're just like, get out.
	You creep.
	So while that happens, then Trump would get thrown out for bullying DeSantis, and then DeSantis would just leave because he'd be crying, like, I don't want beer anymore!
	Or DeSantis would just fall asleep crying at the bar, and then he would get kicked out after the last call.
	They'd just be like, hey man, you don't have to go home, but you can't stay here.
	Also, Trump doesn't drink, so he gets kicked out for just being cheap, which is very Trump.
	He gets kicked out for not abiding by the two-drink minimum.
	That was, I remember I was doing, I was door dashing and I got an order.
	And when I pulled up to the address to drop off the order, it was a strip club.
	And I was like, this is really weird.
	Cause what am I going to do?
	Cause there's all these signs when you get to the front door, it's like $10 cover charge.
	I'm like, I ain't paying to drop this food off.
	Do I just get a free show here?
	And like the moment I got anywhere near the second door, like a guy ran out with a security shirt.
	He's like, is this for Tammy?
	I'm like, yes.
	He just ripped the bag away from me and ran back inside.
	Oh, okay.
	That's how strip clubs handle DoorDash.
	I get it now.
	No free looks.
	You don't get to see any free boobies.
	No boobies for you.
	Nope.
	Nope.
	You're just a help, buddy.
	Just give the talent their food and get the fuck out.
	Okay.
	Yeah.
	So, uh, thank you for the question, Cleodora.
	Uh, Ken Stancil asks, uh, Freddie Potatoes wants to know how he looks in this tie and what do you, what do you order when you order a tie?
	Okay, so this dog is literally the cutest ever.
	I love him.
	It's a cute little fellow, that is certainly true.
	There's no denying that this is a cute pup.
	The tie being crooked is driving me fucking crazy, but that's a me problem.
	No, it's quirky!
	See, it doesn't look intentional.
	I don't know, I hate it!
	I hate that the tie is off-center, but the dog itself, its cuteness cannot be denied.
	I do love a nice dog.
	do love a nice do not love a nice dog.
	As for Thai food, I am partial to I usually just get curries or like if they have like
	like most of the places have like a specialty noodle dish that will
	have some sort of name unique to the place.
	Like there was one in the like I lived in Kansas, the Kansas City area for a time, and our local spot
	had a dish that was just called like the.
	Like something at kc.mo or whatever.
	It was just like a very obviously specific Kansas City reference for this like local Kansas City Thai place.
	And it was delicious.
	You know, it's usually sort of like a better version of Pad Thai or whatever, but I like a green curry, especially.
	I just love curry.
	I love all things Thai.
	There's a Thai place by my place and it has a thing called the Garlic Lover, which it's just a lot of garlic and noodles.
	It's great.
	I'm going to have to get taken to a Thai place because I've never had Thai food.
	Oh my gosh, come to Arizona.
	I'll take you to so many.
	There's some like, there's some like kind of local to you.
	There's some good, uh, you know, decent-ish Thai places.
	Thai is delicious.
	The real thing I get every time, no matter where I go, uh, is Thai iced tea for my beverage and, uh, the Thai custard, however they serve it.
	Usually with like coconut rice or whatever, but I love a Thai custard.
	It's also good if you have friends who are vegan or vegetarian, because it's like lots of good options, you know?
	You can have the tofu, you can have- I'm hungry for Thai food!
	I know, me too, I'm like thinking about it.
	Dude, this question sucks, because I don't want Thai food.
	Yeah, it's too early for Thai food.
	That's not true.
	It's never too early for Thai food.
	And so thank you for the question.
	Our next question is, what is your favorite soup?
	And Pancake Peasant asked that.
	Oh man.
	Can I chicken out and just say all?
	I love a good soup.
	Me too.
	I like soup.
	I like chicken.
	I like chicken mostly with rice.
	Chicken and rice.
	Maybe some carrots thrown in there.
	Some stuff like that.
	But just keep it really basic.
	You can have the broth have all kinds of flavoring in it.
	You can put all kinds of onions and shit for that.
	But a really basic chicken soup is just awesome for me.
	I could eat that for a week.
	I'm always happy with that.
	Yeah, I like tomato-based soups.
	They're pretty good.
	Big fan of tomato-based.
	There's this cheap-ass sopa that I would eat a lot growing up.
	It's just some Mexican-based soup.
	It just tastes kind of tomato-y.
	That shit slaps.
	I can eat that shit every day.
	Soup rocks.
	Also, I like mushroom soup.
	Yeah, I mean, assuming that stews are soups in this category, probably beef stew.
	If I was looking for something American, just because I could eat beef stew over white rice every day for months and months at a time before I was getting sick of it.
	I grew up eating that a lot, so it's just got a nostalgia flavor for me.
	I'm sure that internationally there are better soups than that.
	I love a good ramen.
	You know what I mean?
	Ramen's technically soup.
	Like you go to a place and you get like a sick ramen or whatever.
	I think Pho is overrated, so Pho would not be there.
	But Chinese hot and sour soup is one of my favorites.
	I love a Chinese hot and sour.
	That's usually one of my measures of a good Chinese place is whether or not they have a good hot and sour soup.
	I like a good hot pot, you know?
	You got a little bit of everything in it.
	Yes, I've never done a hot pot.
	I've been to hot pot establishments, but never to do their hot pot.
	It's usually hot pot and hibachi or hot pot and sushi.
	I'm always there for the wrong thing.
	But yeah, I feel like I should rep the time I've spent over the course of my life in New England and represent some sort of fish-based soup.
	But instead of going for clam chowder, which I do like, I'm going to go for a lobster bisque.
	Which I think is just a better version of a clam chowder.
	Yeah, that's facts.
	I do like clam chowder and lobster bisque.
	Those are both very good also.
	Once you said clam chowder, I was like, oh right, that's really good!
	A light went off in my head.
	Yeah, but god, what soup isn't great?
	Yeah, pretty much.
	Actually, I'm not gonna lie, I don't like egg drop soup.
	I don't like that flavor with the broth experience.
	I don't like the flavor of egg, but with a hot liquid.
	That's not my jam.
	Okay, so thank you for the question, and that brings us to one of our questions from Chairman Walkman's list of questions, which is, if you could own a casino, would you have a heme?
	Huh.
	Well, I'm interested to hear your take on this one, Mike, because you certainly got more casino experience than either of us, I'm sure.
	Yeah.
	If I had a casino, I don't think it would fly in the poker room, because I think that, like, doing this shit would probably get your staff assaulted.
	Well, just assume that, like, you know, pie in the sky.
	Like, the sky's the limit.
	Go nuts.
	Well, my theme would be to do it in the style of a Dick's Last Resort, where my casino was, like, intentionally antagonistic staff helping you.
	They would tell you the right play on blackjack.
	And if you did the wrong thing, they would be like, Oh my God, this idiot.
	Like just, just giving you the razzle dazzle when you made mistakes or stuff like that.
	And I just think that like that kind of like, um, like that kind of thing, I, I would, it'd definitely be a very niche kind of thing.
	I don't know that it'd be a very mainstream casino, but you would definitely get like press for like going that angle of it.
	Cause every now and then you'll like hear people like, this Chicago diner has staff insult people.
	Ha ha!
	Yeah, but the thing about Dick's Last Resort is that nobody there is losing a big gob of money.
	You know what I mean?
	Like at some point your cocktail waitress is just gonna needle somebody who just like dumped like 6k in a table or whatever and then all of a sudden that guy's just gonna fucking go absolutely ballistic.
	Oh yeah, that's why I'm saying it'll never work, but that'd be like dreaming the pie in the sky universe is to do the Dick's Last Resort like casino.
	But part of the theme is that complimentary drinks all have, like, downers in them.
	You're just getting dosed so that you don't have the impulse to just completely fuckin', like, ape out.
	Just, like, jump up on a fuckin' blackjack table and just tear your shirt off with a thump in your chest.
	Yeah.
	HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT MY PENIS IS SMALL!
	How dare you!
	Uh, crazy.
	Yeah, I mean, I don't have a particular theme in mind, but I would imagine that I would have to have a theme.
	I just feel like they probably do better with a theme.
	Although, maybe, like, a loose, like, maybe, like, a looser theme?
	Like, I can picture something, like, if I just had, like, an unlimited budget to make it look great, like, just having one that's just, like, Hey, the theme of this casino is that it just looks, like, from the 20s.
	They just have, like, classic furnishings, all classic everything.
	Like, it just looks real nice.
	The whole thing's got, like, a speakeasy vibe.
	Like, that would be cool.
	But, you know, is there a market for that sort of thing?
	Who knows?
	But I would certainly love to have a big building that was just like, oh my god, it looks like a brand new casino straight out of, like, 1926.
	Yeah, I think that that is possible, because there is a lot of themed casinos on the Strip, because you have Luxor, which is a goddamn pyramid, you have Excalibur, which is a giant fun castle, and then you have New York, New York, which is New York themed.
	So, I mean, there are, like, themed castles around there.
	So I think like a classy 1920s style casino would be a thing
	that would like it would get buzzed for a while. I think people would definitely want to check it out for that kind
	of like ambiance to see what it looks like.
	Haley, you got anything for casinos?
	It's a weed themed casino. Um, and they have those like weed
	You get the weed drinks.
	It's shaped like a big bong and every hour, depending what time it is, it lets out a little bit of smoke at the top of the bong.
	So if it's one o'clock, you get one puff of smoke.
	If it's two o'clock, two puffs of smoke.
	That's my casino.
	What made me the first thing the first thing you said was like on the hour reminded me of was there because I lived out in Vegas there was in the card room at the MGM there was a restaurant like right next to it.
	And every hour, all the staff had to dance.
	Oh no, that's not fun!
	It happens if you go to Texas Roadhouse!
	Yeah, that's a nightmare!
	You're sitting there, tucking into a nice little ribeye, and then all of a sudden it'll be like... What is going on?
	I just want to eat!
	Right, but the Texas Roadhouse, that's usually like for a birthday or some shit, like this was like a literally hourly thing.
	And, and like, there were tables and there were stations where the staff had to jump up on the tables and the stations and dance.
	And it was so funny because like, you would get you'd watch like, I don't know, like 75% of the staff were like wearing sexy outfits and totally into the dance because this is what they were there for.
	They were They were entertainers, and then you had the 25% who were just in regular clothes who were like, I'm doing this so I don't get fired fucking goddammit every hour of this shit.
	And it was just, finding the 25% that were going through the motions was just so hilarious to me.
	Just seeing their dead eyes as they had to friggin' just bust a move was awesome.
	You just go in there and just pick one of them, probably one of the more enthusiastic ones, just to see if there, because with the other ones you could probably predict the reaction.
	And just go up and just be like, hey, I'm going to be here for a while.
	And just so you know, whenever there's dancing, I'm going to be looking at you and only you.
	Like, I really hope you bring it.
	I can't wait to see your performances over the course of the evening, because again, I'm just going to be looking like I'm going to be staring hard at you.
	I was just like, what the fuck, and see if we can get their heads.
	I don't advocate doing this.
	This is a funny thought experiment, but something you shouldn't do, because don't bother people while they work.
	But I do just like the idea of somebody just being like, God, this guy's in my head.
	Like, I don't know where he is, but I know that he's looking at me.
	Yeah, that was just such a ridiculous thing, because all the poker players were just rolling their eyes, because every now and then, you would just, boom, the music would just ramp up in that place.
	From various tables, you could see three or four of them dancing.
	And there was, I don't know, 16 staff members that were there, and they all had to run to their positions.
	That had to suck if someone was like, Hey, can I put my order in?
	Yeah, you can put your order in in two minutes.
	I have to dance for two minutes now.
	I'll be right back to get your drinks.
	So, that brings us to our final question, as always.
	What are you guys looking forward to?
	Ant-Man, Quantumania.
	My friends and I are going to see it this Saturday.
	I'm excited to watch Jonathan Majors play Kang the Conqueror because I like that actor and I am assuming that he is going to be pretty important to the fiction going forward.
	That should be pretty exciting.
	Hailey?
	Breakfast.
	I just woke up and hopped on here and I'm going to eat.
	Sounds good.
	Sounds good.
	I am looking forward to the fact that after I work my weekend shifts, and I'm picking up an extra shift to cover for somebody, I get to take a week off from work.
	I get to go on vacation.
	And And so, on top of my exciting things to look forward to, during my vacation, I get to go see a dentist for the first time since COVID!
	So yay, my teeth!
	My happy teeth!
	Healthy.
	Oh yes, that's me.
	The healthiest boy that ever helped the health.
	Wow, what an absolute health unit this lad is.
	I knew you had it in, Mike.
	I always knew you could do it.
	Man, one day.
	I can't wait to see how great your new dentures look.
	Oh, they're gonna be so good.
	These wooden ones, the Washington as they call them when they install them in my mouth, they're not working out too great for me.
	So when I get my new chompers, it's gonna be great.
	It's gonna be awesome.
	Well, on that note, it's time for us to hitchhike our way out of Hellworld for the week and hope we don't get hatchet murdered by whoever decides to stop and pick us up.
	You know, it's a coin flip, but them's the open roads.
	Sometimes you get Jeepers Creepers'd or whatever.
	Thank you, everybody, for listening and supporting the show.
	If you'd like to continue to support the show, you can do so for free by telling a friend or leaving a five-star review or whatever.
	Tell the algorithm that you think that we're pretty sweet.
	If you have money and you'd like to give it to us, we will happily accept it, although we don't know why you'd want to do so.
	However, you should use that impulse and direct yourself to patreon.com slash PokerPolitics, where you can become one of our beautifuller babies with a donation of at least $2 a month.
	Anything over $5 a month gets you access to all of our bonus content.
	Thank God we have a big 40 to 50 hour plus back catalogue of it, because we've been pretty difficult to sit down and schedule the new stuff.
	But when it comes, you get access to all of that, too.
	So if you want to hear more of us and you haven't heard any of our series, such as Kabalin, What We Do Out of Shadows, Mule's Errand, etc., you go ahead and do so by donating there at $5 and above.
	Thank you so much to all of our beautiful babies.
	We love you, babies!
	If you have money and you don't want to give it to us, you can donate it to love146.org and do a little good with it.
	They are an organization whose vision is the end of child trafficking and exploitation, end quote.
	Wow.
	Sounds pretty cool.
	Thanks, as always, to DJ Minimal Effort for the use of our intro song.
	Still no social media for DJ Minimal Effort.
	What a cool guy.
	Our buddy Frosty, you can find on Twitter, at FrostyBO.
	He does all of our voice work when we need it, such as the voice of Q and all of our bumps, etc.
	The show is, of course, on Twitter still, for the time being, at hellworld, with a Q instead of an O. I am at hellworldL.
	Mike is at PokerPolitics, and Haley is at AZ underscore RightWingWatch.
	I always get this confused.
	AZ underscore RWW.
	There we go.
	Or you can just search Arizona Right-Wing Watch.
	You'll find me.
	Or you can just search Arizona Right-Wing Watch.
	Yeah, you'll find me.
	I probably should have written that down ahead of time, and of course I did.
	This has just been a funny bit, and the bit is over now.
	What a good bit.
	So, as always, for another successful episode of the Avengers in Hellworld, I have been your recurring I like to say regular, but I missed last week.
	Recurring, most of the time, host, Hellworld L. Joined by special guest host, Arizona Right Wing Watch, aka Hayley.
	Thank you again for joining us.
	And of course, our expert at all things QAnon, Crazy Mr. Mike Rains.

▲