Adventures In HellwQrld Episode #67: DoodleGate and HammerCoin with Trapezoid!
This week Trapezoid of Discovery fills in for Sarge and tells us all about some fake evidence a Big Lie election fraudster tried to scam a judge with. Also the crew goes over the Army Vaccine and how it has impacted the QAnon narrative, the Let's Go Brandon Dad turns into a right wing grifter, and the GOP fails to run the Green Bay Sweep. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
This week, Sarge is being replaced by the Trapezoid of Discovery.
Is that right?
Did I get it right?
Yeah, that's absolutely correct.
I am a Trapezoid of Discovery, a.k.a.
Get Innocuous on Twitter.
Aha!
And we are also joined, as always, by the Mysterious Hell.
Happy New Year, my beautiful babies!
We did it.
We made it through.
Yes.
Another year of this madness that we have all been totally immersed in, in Hellworld.
And now that Q's been gone for a year, the QAnon thing is over.
We're all out of work.
Applause.
We did it.
I love it.
Hand shaking over your shoulders motion.
Yeah.
That's one of the funniest things that people would tell me.
They'd ask me, like, hey, now that Q's gone, why hasn't QAnon gone away?
And my reaction would usually be, did Christianity end when they crucified Christ?
I mean, just because the hero of the story's gone doesn't mean people can't keep telling stories.
I mean, this is just a narrative.
This is just a grift-based narrative now.
These people aren't going to let it go.
They've got faith-healing books to sell.
They've got $32 cans of coffee to sell.
They've got to make payments on their Bentley, as Juan07 makes it clear to us.
And Q didn't even have the decency to show back up for an Easter.
He didn't pop back up a little while later and just be like, I'm back and making posts again, and now I'm going back to space!
My home planet needs me.
I'm going to go hang out with L. Ron Hubbard.
It's going to be great.
He's so good.
So yeah, sadly, sadly, the podcast must continue because QAnon remains existent.
And since we're talking about QAnon, although I don't think it's going to happen this week, we might get into some dark stuff.
So here's a content warning.
Content Warning The Adventures in Hellworld Podcast talks in-depth about QAnon, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse and violence against people.
Listener discretion advised.
So Trapezoid, the big news coming from your world was a thread that you posted about what I like to call Doodlegate.
So explain the lawsuit that surrounds and why this this quote-unquote piece of evidence is very obviously fraudulent and is going to hurt the people that are being sued in this situation.
Yeah, so starting a couple days after the election last year, the election that will never end, someone, a far-right pundit named Joe Altman, who has a daily podcast, regaled everyone with the story of an Antifa conference call that he was on because there's, you know, of course, like, Antifa conference calls.
So the story is that he was tipped off in September to an Antifa conference call that involved a bunch of activists in Colorado and I think specifically like the Denver area.
And while he was eavesdropping on the call, he overheard someone say or someone referred to as Eric or Eric from Dominion and He later on the call, the conversation turned towards the subject of the upcoming election because it was late September and someone apparently said like, what are we going to do if Trump wins?
And in reply, Apparently Eric from Dominion allegedly said, I'm going to make fucking sure of that.
It's not going to happen.
And, you know, Altman says he, he said some other things, but essentially that's it.
That Altman overheard someone who was identified as Eric from Dominion on a call in late September with Antifa activists say, I'm going to make fucking sure That Trump doesn't win the election.
So you're saying you don't get on Antifa conference calls?
I mean, I do one on Tuesdays and Fridays most weeks.
I mean, it's pretty, pretty standard in our line of work to be on the Antifa conference call.
I've got the gold membership, but no one's been sending me the invites.
Gotta upgrade to diamond!
I guess so.
I picture an American Psycho-style boardroom meeting with a bunch of people that are just like, hello fellow kids, we are Antifa, please join us for our conference call.
And apparently, during this call, they refer to everyone by their first name and then where they are employed.
Like Eric from Dominion.
I just love the idea that they'll just be like, yes, Lucy with Antifa here, Eric from Dominion, what do we do if Trump wins?
You know, Trump from failed business and former presidency?
I imagine that's exactly how it went.
Trump from the stakes?
Yeah, Trump from Trump University.
How will we defeat him?
Let's get a hold of Paul from MSNBC to see what he's got lined up for propaganda to make sure this doesn't go through.
I want to see the focus test footage from when they screened the first pass at this Antifa transcript, and at the end of it, the guy's just like, Pretty good, right?
They're like, uh, question, who the hell is Eric?
We don't know who Eric is.
This isn't the smoking good you think it is.
There's a thousand Erics.
He's like, damn it!
He's like, just call him Eric from Dominion!
People will know!
It's that Eric.
Eric from the Evil Voting Service, the software company.
And now I'm very mad at myself that I didn't make my Antifa character Rachel from MSNBC to make it really obvious, because that's what all the characters have to be.
It just has to be a person who is obviously who they are from business that they are associated with.
Wolf from CNN, how are we going to defeat Trump?
I mean, just so ridiculous.
I mean, that's it.
That's exactly how it goes.
Yeah.
So, so he, so now, uh, Eric from Dominion is suing, uh, this guy for, uh, defamination in this case.
And that's the crux of where this is all coming from.
Yeah, exactly.
So it turns out there is an Eric from Dominion.
His name is Eric Coomer.
My God!
Hold on to your pants.
And so on November 9th, I think it was, on his podcast, Altman, you know, told this whole story of this call that supposedly happened September 26th.
And something that the lawsuit points out that I think is pretty hilarious is that Goldman had been broadcasting basically daily between November 26 and November 9.
And he didn't feel the need to announce this democracy shattering scheme that he overheard until after the election.
So he, he like, So he not only waited until after the election, he waited until Biden was declared the winner by the media.
Like, what is the timeline for that?
Because I mean, the election was on the 3rd, and Biden was declared the winner on the Saturday after.
So it was like four or five days later.
So like around the 7th or the 8th, Biden was declared the winner.
So he doesn't even do this before the election.
Then during that tumult where we're just counting the ballots in Philadelphia and pretty much everybody knows Biden's going to win, but the media just won't say it because they don't want to make Trump sad.
And then finally on Saturday, they're like, Hey guys, Biden won.
We're going to admit it.
It's like that whole time, he's just totally silent.
Only after Biden is officially declared the winner by the media, does he then bring up Eric from Dominion.
Yeah, yeah, you know, very conveniently.
And so he announced it on his podcast, which at the time, I don't know how big of a personality he was.
You know, I imagine he at least had a few thousand weekly or daily listeners, but I don't know.
I'm pulling that out of my ass.
So he announced that, then he ends up getting interviewed by Michelle Malkin.
He's Either interviewed or mentioned in the One America News Network special that Ron Watkins was in, dominionizing the vote that Trump hyped.
And, you know, this whole Eric Antifa thing kind of becomes Stop the Steal Lord and spreads throughout the ecosystem and really begins to gain traction.
And it was, I think, before the end of the year, sometime in December, Coomer filed a defamation lawsuit against Altman, One American News, Michelle Malkin, Rudy Giuliani.
There's 14 co-defendants total.
And if I remember right, this was the first big lawsuit kind of pushing back against all of this nonsense.
And yeah, so that's kind of where we're at now to an extent.
What's interesting, or what I find hilarious, and this is reflected in the depositions that you can read from the lawsuit with like Jim Hoff from Gateway Pundit, Charles Herring from One America News, is that Coomer's lawyers were asking, how did you fact check this?
And a lot of the responses were, Well, I think it was Jim Hoft, but it might have been Charles Herring, essentially said, I mean, Michelle Malkin talked to him and I know Michelle's a great reporter.
So that's good, right?
If you can't trust Michelle Malkin, who can you trust?
Oh my God.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Uh, yeah.
So they didn't even, they didn't even bother to fact check what this guy was saying.
He just got out there, started riffing on this stuff, and it just became gospel in the QAnon world the way the Golden Server in Frankfurt or the Italian spy satellites were.
And we now just had these ridiculous narratives of all these DSX Macanism McGuffins that had stolen the election from Trump.
Yeah, exactly.
Is there any proof floating around of any of this?
I am glad you asked.
Is the answer just no?
Is that why you're glad I asked?
It's almost better than no.
There is proof-ish.
Altman doesn't have a recording of the call.
He can't name or at least provide a full name.
I think he says whoever tipped him off to the call was also on the call, but he's not really revealed their identity.
He's never been able to name anyone else on the call.
No one else has stepped forward and said this call happened.
There's no evidence to that extent whatsoever.
What we do have are four pages of undated handwritten notes that Altman took.
That look, you know, very much like you would expect notes from someone like Joel Mendeleev.
At one point it says, like, Eric Jedi question mark.
They're completely insane.
They look like something you'd find on the set of Seven or something.
A lot of corkboard and string.
Yeah, exactly.
And then the other piece, and this is what I kind of covered on Twitter last week, is he has a screenshot that he said was from September 26th of a Google search for the words Eric Dominion Denver, Colorado.
And so his rationale there is Why would I have the screenshot of me doing the search on September 26th if I didn't hear someone identified as Eric from Dominion on an Antifa conference call say that they were going to steal the election for Trump?
I would only ever search that if I heard that happen.
And so here is the screenshot I am telling you is from September 26th.
Does he have any sort of answer for people saying, well, my justification for that is what you were doing is a complete fabrication that you planned.
Like, has anyone just pushed back on him and just been like, what you're saying is a lie, a theatrical lie that you have plotted out.
Right.
I mean...
Yeah, the lawyers have.
I mean, his deposition, he was really standoffish.
At one point, this is kind of a tangent, but I happened to re-see this today, and it made me laugh.
He starts talking about how he thinks the judge in the case is Antifa, and his lawyer cuts in, and because I think he says something along the lines of, do you want me to talk about how the judge is Antifa?
And his lawyer, just in the transcript, you just see, no, don't.
Like, he's really, you know, boisterous, and he's basically doubled down on the screenshot of the notes.
That's his only thing he has to fall back on, is why would I have this screenshot of a Google search, which is a super normal thing people do, that, you know, happened in September 26.
But the catch is, and I had been looking at the screenshot for a while before this stood out to me, you know, It's a screenshot that only shows the Google results and the search bar.
There's nothing particularly interesting in the results.
There are a few things that specifically mention Eric Coomer.
There's a few things that mention other Erics in Denver that for some reason were on a page that had Dominion and the name somewhere, you know, like Old Dominion College or something like that.
And I had been looking at the screenshot for a while.
Uh, and, uh, kind of had like a, uh, Doc Brown and back to the future fall and hit your head on the toilet.
Think of the flux capacitor moment and, and looked at the Google doodle, which is the, uh, you know, the Google will decorate their logo anytime there's a special occasion or, or for various things.
Um, and, uh, I, I looked and noticed that you could see the doodle in the screenshot.
Um, and then, uh, you know, Google will also keep an archive of these doodles online.
Uh, I went back and looked, uh, at the doodle for September 26th.
Turns out there was no doodle for September 26th.
Uh, I scrolled forward a bit and noticed that.
The doodle visible in the screenshot matches exactly the doodle that was used on November 11th for Veterans Day 2020.
That's the first and only time that picture had ever appeared publicly and yet here it is in a screenshot supposedly taken on September 26th.
Hence Doodlegate, I get it.
And now I get it.
Right.
Yeah.
My God, it's a smoking doodle.
Yes.
It is a smoking doodle.
So, I mean, it really looks like, again, he just tried to, he created this whole story around that time, around November, around the time of his podcast, where he announced this information on November 9th.
And then a couple days later, when he had to try to figure out how he was going to backfill this nonsense, he creates this screenshot on November 11th and claims it's from September before the election.
So this whole story, the timeline of it lines up to be much more in line with him just creating it out of whole cloth on November 9th.
And then panicking and starting to work on, how do I backdate this?
How do I get all this stuff to make it look like I was sitting on this?
Which again, him sitting on this looks terrible for him if you actually think about it.
This is one of those things where the headline in the story is supposed to just activate your outrage sensor.
So you just get mad about an Antifa conference call and you're furious that Eric from Dominion stole the election.
They never want you to always hate an Eric from Dominion.
We've always been at war with Eric from Dominion.
And they never want you to like sit down, take a couple deep breaths and then think to yourself,
wait a minute, this guy who is the guy that me and my like 1000 friends have been listening to
on a podcast every so often, who are a tiny community of Joel Altman fans.
We are not thinking about the fact that he is telling us that about a week before the election,
he heard the election was being stolen.
And while we were all nervously watching our screens as the Biden number was going up and the Trump number was going down, During the week of counting, he never was telling us about Eric from Dominion's plot to fuck us over.
And only now, only after evil Grandpa Joe and Jezebel Kamala are now our president and vice president-elect, only now is Joel coming forward with this information.
You could have saved America, buddy, if you'd just gotten off your ass!
I mean, hey, forging evidence takes a while.
This evidence is just gonna forge itself out of nothing.
I have to handwrite notes.
I have to do Google searches and take pictures of it with my flip phone.
Yeah, there's a whole thing, too, about how he had a phone that had more evidence on it, but it ended up broken.
So he submitted, as part of evidence, a picture of a broken iPhone.
It happens all the time.
It happens all the time.
I mean, that's the only phone I keep all my Eric from Dominion evidence on.
I didn't upload it to the cloud.
No, none of that.
No backups, no fail-saves.
Yeah.
You should see this guy's Bigfoot photography.
It is extra blurry.
You wouldn't believe how blurry it is.
That's like one of my favorite things in the conspiracy genre is the person that was going to blow the case wide open and then they always mysteriously get killed or they mysteriously have something happen to the evidence.
It just, it always, it always somehow goes, uh, tits up on them when like they were just a moment away from certain victory.
It was, they were always on the, on the precipice of blowing this whole thing wide open and then something went horribly wrong, tragically.
Well, I mean, hey, the Clintons are just good at what they do.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, the Clintons let you get so close to uncovering their criminal cabal, and then they just crush your dreams at the last possible second.
Yeah, for legal reasons, I don't want to get into exactly what they do, but, listener, be assured that I am putting my thumb firmly across my throat if you catch my drift.
If you cross the Clintons, you get that.
The thing that doesn't play on radio that I'm doing, that I assure you.
This is the theater of the mind in podcasting.
Just work with us here.
So exactly, besides Joel Oltman, who are the defendants in this case who are now looking at Joel Oltman's evidence melting away before their very eyes and asking their lawyers?
So how big do we cut the check to Eric Coomer here?
What are we going to do, boss?
Let me see if I can pull up the the full list.
What you brought up to you is pretty funny because I, after seeing the the doodle thing, went back and looked at Other instances and like motions to dismiss filed by other defendants that may have relied on on Joe's supposed proof to back their claims and there were at least a handful one I specifically recall from one American news where.
They, yeah, they essentially were just like, I mean, they said the same thing, but very lawyerly, like, why would he have this screenshot?
Like, he's the screen.
In fact, they called it irrebuttable, the screenshot of the search results.
And it's, I would love to know what those lawyers are thinking now.
Those lawyers are thinking that our billable hours are still on your record, payment is due, we did our level best to help you, but now pay us our fees and then we're going to tell you how much you need to settle for, which is whatever this guy wants, basically, because your irrebuttable evidence has now been butted quite successfully.
This seems like a Law and Order episode where it's just like, you know, there's like one plucky clue that somebody like discovers at the end and it's like, oh snap!
This turns everything on its head!
But at the same time it's like...
It's all simple enough that the audience can keep up with it.
It doesn't require any sort of special legalese.
These people were just like, hey, our proof is rock solid.
There's no possible way you can rebuke this proof.
It's just irrebuffable.
And you're just like, OK, well, what about that Google Doodle?
They're like, what?
I love that.
Like this, this tiny thing that is like the fact that like the Google image is
just so seared into our memories that you don't even notice the doodles like half
the time now, because they're like, Oh, you're usually give me the search bar.
Let me type in whatever, whatever I need to look for today.
What exotic form of fetish porn am I trying to find?
And then you just move on.
You just move on to your search results.
You completely ignore the doodle.
So, like, never in a million years would this guy have thought that, like, the doodle would be remotely interesting or important to the case.
That, like, the Google would be a timestamp to show when he actually did the search for Eric from Colorado Dominion, Eric the bad man who stole the election from Trump, or whatever the actual search was.
Yeah.
I think the book should be called Achilles Doodle.
Yes!
New York Times bestselling Achilles Doodle.
Yes, that's the dream.
I think I found the list here.
So the full list of defendants in the case are Joe Altman, FEC United, which is an organization run by Joe Altman that also has a militia arm.
They're They're known for showing up and pushing back at school board meetings and things like that, as well as a company called Shuffling Madness Media, which it looks like is the the DBA doing business as for Altman's Conservative Daily.
Media situation.
James Hofton, Gateway Pundit, Michelle Malkin, Eric Metaxas, which, if I remember right, is a radio host on Salem, on some Salem media radio station.
Herring Network, so One American News.
Chanel Rion, who's one of the OAN anchors.
Let's see, Sydney Powell and her, And Sidney Powell PCs.
I don't know what that means, but Sidney Powell.
Defending the Republic, which is Sidney Powell's PAC or non-profit.
The Grift.
Right.
I forgot that the Trump campaign is also named, as is Rudy Giuliani.
So, a real who's who.
The guy doing $400 cameos is getting hit with yet another lawsuit.
I love how beyond broke Rudy is going to be at the end of all this shit.
It's just so funny.
He's just got to be like, God dammit, these Dominion guys, they just don't quit.
Just a sweating shoe polish all over his face.
Yes.
Right.
God.
I, I, the Gateway Pundit getting drilled made me so happy because that guy is absolutely
the total worst.
And the fact that he now literally exists almost entirely to get QAnon clicks and reposts on Gab and Telegram and all other alt-media sources.
I mean, it's just the most pathetic way to live is just writing these ridiculous headlines like, will Trump be reinstated?
Shocking evidence!
And then you read it, and it's just a bunch of nonsense, and it has nothing to do with anything.
In his defense, if they ever did have any evidence, it would be shocking.
Yes!
Yes!
If they were just like, hey, here's a thing that we're going to say, and we can prove it, it would be like, oh damn, really?
Wow!
That is stunning!
That is true.
It would be worthy of that breaking headline.
So far, they are batting 1,000 and not serving it up.
My favorite Gateway Pundit article of recent memory was when they realized that Youngkin winning in Virginia may be bad for their paranoia-based audience and branding.
So some guy wrote an article that was like, was Junkin's win a deep state plan to appease patriots?
And it was just like, did the deep state control this election and just throw us a bone so they can rig 2022 and 2024?
Are our elections still rigged?
And I was just like, man, just go with 9D chess to keep your audience paranoid and out of their minds.
It's so beautiful.
Just like the inside of the writer's room, and it's like two guys at their desks, and one guy's like reclining back in his chair, tossing a Nerf football into the air to himself, and the other guy's just like, how are we gonna spin this one?
And the football guy catches the football, looks up, and just goes, Deep State Plot?
And then they both look at each other, not knowingly.
That's their solution for every single thing.
That'd be great.
Yep, just Deep State Plot.
Everything's a Deep State Plot.
We could make that a 15 second sitcom.
Yes!
Quibi!
Yes!
Even though you're dead, come back!
We'll give you a 17 minute show about the writer's room for QAnon.
Mike, you and I need to book our flight down to Dallas so we can start waiting around at the dressing room for Quibi to come back!
Yes!
That's gonna be our comeback.
We're gonna show up with signs that say, Bring Quibi Back, and just integrate ourselves with those lunatics for that purpose.
It'd be great.
We just get on Negative 48's livestream and all we're doing is just pitching shows to Quibi.
We're just trying to make it!
That's all we're doing!
And Negative 48's got a big audience.
Also, everyone else who's around him, please leave.
You're an occult and it's hurting your families.
This is bad.
Please stop.
Vertical format is the future.
Yes.
Alright, rock on.
Well, Trapezoid, anything else that the folks at home should know about this Lamb Bang lawsuit?
Did you say that it was... So far the lawsuit has been, you know, doled out, but that's where it stands currently.
The Doodlegate thing debunks the one actual piece of evidence that may have been presented, and aside from that we're just sort of waiting to see how badly this guy gets smashed.
Yeah, I mean, at this stage, it's actually in the defendants filed in anti-SLAPP motion.
So I'm absolutely not a lawyer, but my understanding is that SLAPP is essentially a law to help prevent frivolous lawsuits.
So there was some like initial, you know, lawyering that happened.
The anti-SLAPP stuff got filed.
They have to wait for that to finish up, I think.
That's where we're at now.
And then, you know, things will proceed from there.
The thing that sucks about following this is the Colorado State Court websites don't really make it easy to access electronic case files or dockets or anything like that.
So it's really difficult to figure out at any given point where this is.
But yeah, I think probably within the next month or two, we'll start to see some more movement on this as the anti-slap stuff gets done and we'll see what happens from there.
Yeah, I do know a little bit more about SLAPP, even though I'm not a lawyer, but what you said is basically true.
It's like, if I file a bullshit lawsuit against somebody in a state with a SLAPP statute, then the person that's being bullshittily sued by me can file a SLAPP injunction, and if the judge rules in their favor, I have to pay my own lawyer's fees and your lawyer's fees for even putting you through this shit.
So that's why when you see all these like lunatics, like filing lawsuits against like Hillary Clinton or any other public figure, getting ready to tear them down, they always go to a state with no slap statutes.
So they can just file that lawsuit, only have to pay their lawyer, who's probably just doing it themselves to get some publicity.
And then when the motion to dismiss is filed, they're not on the hook for anything more than their own like lawyer's fees and the publicity they generated.
And even though I am not a lawyer, here I am with even more information about slaps.
Like, that'd be great, right?
California because they will crush you if you do that shit in those states.
And even though I am not a lawyer, here I am with even more information about slaps.
Like that'd be great.
Right.
If I just started there and I just said, I was just like, here's the real
technical nitty gritty about it.
Not a lawyer, but here, here we go.
Yeah.
We become the, I'm not a lawyer, but podcast.
We're just going on and on about... I might not be a lawyer, but this is legally binding law advice.
Yes!
You should absolutely trust and listen to us on all the things that we're talking about.
So I think we've covered Doodlegate and the lawsuits thereof.
And again, we have to wait for the legal system to slowly grind its way through this process.
And now that, as we've explained, the lawsuit isn't frivolous and they don't have evidence to defend themselves with, hopefully once we get through the slap statutes, then we can get to the real meat and potatoes of These people being forced to retract and cutting Eric Coomer a check.
So that'd be nice.
It'll be the prestige.
Yes, exactly.
We're still waiting on the prestige of the Ghislaine Maxwell trial.
That jury is really dotting their I's and crossing their T's.
I mean, you wouldn't know it by how little press it's been getting.
Oh, absolutely not.
Absolutely not.
Total radio silence.
I love that so much.
Ghislaine who?
What?
Trafficking?
I don't get it.
Yes.
Let's play the news bump then start talking about that stuff.
From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's Q's in the News.
Way to trick our audience, because we're not talking about that, at least as far as my notes go.
Instead, we have to talk about somebody called Let's Go Brandon Dad, which I have in my notes here as LGB Dad, which is very close to being a cool thing that we would not have to discuss.
Yeah, sadly, so this is about a guy, I believe his name is Jason Schmeck, somewhere along those lines.
That sounds right.
That was who he was before he put on the mask.
Yes, exactly.
So our beautiful Schmucky Schmecky guy, he Decided to jump in on the call where the President and the First Lady are tracking Santa on NORAD, and they're having all these kids call in and talk to them about, oh, hey, I hope that Santa gets me this.
And then the President, who in this case is Joe Biden, even though some people will tell you that he's not really the President, and Biden will be like, yeah, I hope you get your toys too and have a great Christmas, little kid.
So just this little PR thing for the President.
And after some kid talked to Biden, His dad grabbed the phone and gave a let's go Brandon to Biden.
And Biden probably knew what the guy was saying, but he wasn't going to take the bait.
So Biden was like, hey, yeah, let's go Brandon.
Whatever.
Waka waka.
Hey.
Ayo.
And then they moved on to the next call because, again, he's the president.
He really doesn't care about this stuff.
So immediately QAnon just like fell all over themselves.
This was the greatest thing in the history of the universe.
The president totally got sick owned.
Biden told himself to go fuck himself.
Boom!
How do you like them apples, libs?
Oh, we totally won!
And they were the happiest clams in the sea over this whole thing.
And then People doing what they do, they figured out who this guy was, and they were like, yo, guy, using your kid's call to the president to talk about the gifts he's getting for Christmas and Santa and all that stuff, and turning it into an excuse to yell at the president to use your coded swear words at him,
That's not great.
I mean, dude, I mean, don't seal your kid's moment to shine to make it all about yourself.
And also, I don't know, don't insult the president when he's trying to be nice to your kid.
And then at the end of that conversation he was like, but my son's name is Brandon!
He's Brandon!
That would have been so crazy.
Leave me alone, you liberals!
If only.
He's just curled up in a fetal position, just going, he's Brandon!
I was just celebrating my son getting a phone call from the president.
That's all I was doing.
Mommy, is daddy gonna be okay?
No, no, little Brandon.
He's dead to us now.
Uh, so that was almost the story he told CNN when he got on CNN, where he proclaimed that he wasn't a Trumper, that he's just an independent guy, that, like, hey, he just gave Biden the razzle-dazzle because he isn't that enamored with him, but it was all in good fun.
He really didn't mean that much by it.
You know, he should have yelled, Baba Booey.
I had no idea what this headline was going into, Thad.
I just randomly brought up the Baba Booey thing earlier like an idiot, and now full circle, baby!
Yes!
I actually did see that from some people on Twitter.
I remember when prankers would just say Baba Booey.
I remember back when this was just a weird riff to show your solidarity with Howard Stern.
It wasn't just a way to yell at the president in coded swearing.
Was this guy one of the jerky boys?
Did we unmask one of the jerky boys and his son Brandon?
That would have been so great if we had.
So after he had his little star turn on CNN where he gave his mea culpa and was all recalcitrant and sad about having done this terrible thing, he then immediately went on Steve Bannon's podcast while wearing a MAGA hat and declared that the election was 100% stolen, Trump is the legitimate president, Trump is his president, and He immediately just cut the brakes and went straight to right-wing grifter town.
So, I mean, it was just...
Absolutely.
It took him all of, like, 15 minutes to pivot from the poor put-upon guy that was just, like, telling a joke to Joe Biden to just be in, like, hashtag stolen election, hashtag, like, Trump's my president.
And if Steve Bannon could get me on that right wing grift and, like, help me launch my own podcast or whatever, I'm here for it.
I'm doing it.
I mean, it's just...
And he's like, I don't know who likes Trump more, me or my son, Brandon Jerky.
Exactly.
I mean, I'm sure Brandon's going to hook him up with a few Let's Go Brandon crypto coins, since the LGB coins is a new thing that they've launched.
I love that Bannon has just created another scam after the wall scam that he was convicted for and then got pardoned for by the president, who was Trump at the time, that he's just back to doing this shit.
And like now you don't even get to have a fake way to hate immigrants with a wall that won't be built.
Now you get a way to be mad at Joe Biden for a valueless cryptocurrency.
I just, it's so funny.
Man, they're like, oh, okay, how, blockchain just must get scammers just so horny.
They, like, there is some serious blood flow, like, when these scammer types hear anything about blockchain.
Yeah.
It's like, oh my god.
It's basically, yeah, they're like, think about pump and dump schemes, but you can get away with it anonymously and there's no regulations.
Oh, I mean, that's something I saw in crypto like months and months ago was people just openly talking about doing a pump and dump and explaining that, look, what we're doing is legal because there's no regulation.
You can't do this in the stock market, but you can do this here because nobody in our government has a fucking clue what crypto is.
Like, these are the people who think the Internet's a series of tubes.
They're never going to understand how Bitcoin Or Ethereum or any of this stuff works.
Like literally, they're going to have to hire crypto specialists to write a law to like regulate or outlaw crypto.
And that's going to happen like never.
I mean, Kristen Sinema just got bought out by big crypto to like cut some regulation out of a Senate bill.
So these people are already making enough money scamming people that they're like buying legislators.
So Also, and I mean, this has fuck all to do with QAnon, but I do just love that thanks to the presence of all of these cryptocurrencies, at any moment, richest person in the world, Elon Musk, can simply wave his digital hand over a currency and make, like, thousands of people millionaires.
He can just be like, mm, yes, Brandon coin looks pretty good to me, and then ding!
All of a sudden, the Brandon coin disciples all get their huge payday!
What a fucking dystopia we live in.
We're like, yeah, joke currency, literally named after internet memes, and then richest man on the earth, Elon Musk, can just wave, like, I named my baby a cosine, or whatever, and can just wave his hand and turn thousands of people into millionaires.
I hate it so much!
Nothing says dystopia like the term.
Kristen Sinema got bought out by big crypto.
Yes.
Did Crypto just buy a stadium?
Like, is it one of the... Yeah, in LA.
Yeah, it's the Crypto.com stadium.
Not even just Crypto, Crypto.com!
Oh, Lord.
We got Matt Damon doing a commercial about how young people having sex is basically akin to the Wright Brothers having the first man to flight, and that you can be like these two things if you buy crypto.
That commercial blows my mind every time I watch it, because I'm just trying to see the through line between all the different characters in the commercial, and I'm just not seeing it.
I really want to add this up.
I really want to understand what's going on.
It's like, how are people hanging out at a rave equal to the Wright Brothers?
Just square that circle for me.
That's all I want.
I can die happy if someone were able to do that for me, but I don't think I will.
Mike, I just took a new dose of my sellout pills and it occurred to me that if we keep ragging on big crypto, we'll never be able to sell out as hard as we want.
Hey, crypto's great.
Any cryptocurrencies who want to invest in an advertisement on the Adventures in Telework podcast, hit us up.
We will... Yeah, do you have an NFT exchange you want us to hock?
Well then, boy howdy, I shall learn what the hell that is.
We will hawk crypto, we will hawk pictures of bored apes, whatever the fuck it is you kids are doing, that you're spending your money on, we're here for it.
We have no souls, and we are totally in it to win it on this stuff.
I love that Let's Go Brandon Dad segwayed to Steve Bannon, segwayed to Crypto so smoothly.
Did we ever get resolution on the Let's Go Brandon Dad thing, or did we just riff ourselves into oblivion?
We wrapped ourselves into oblivion because there was really no resolution because the guy just took the mask off after his scene.
He just showed up and was a piece of shit and that was him.
Yeah, well the other little point of the story I remember seeing from people was...
People getting all up in arms that we were giving him too much attention.
Because they were like, Lauren Boebert turned being the main character of Twitter into being a congresswoman!
And I'm like, actually she was putting in a lot more work than just getting Twitter famous for a day for being a shithead.
Yeah, she owned like a restaurant or whatever where you got discounts if you were openly carrying weapons because she's crazy or whatever.
Right.
She had the open carry bar.
She had gotten in Beto O'Rourke's face.
She had groundwork on top of getting Twitter famous for a day.
Bean Dad isn't going to become a Republican congressman from some district somewhere because he was a weird asshole to his kid.
And everyone put him on Blasphemy.
Mike, I believe you mean Governor Bean Dad.
Checks the newspaper.
Fuckin' Illinois!
I didn't expect it, but hey, it happens!
Son of a bitch!
Your Honor, the proud Judge Beandad presiding.
Yes!
Yes!
Associate Supreme Court Justice Beandad.
Trump snuck him in under the wire.
General Beandad of the United States Army, which is my seamless way of segmenting into our next headline, which is the Army Vaccine.
Another thing that I know absolutely nothing about, listeners, I'm so pleased to have been so disconnected from the world during my vacation.
That I don't know a single thing about a single one of the topics we've discussed this week.
I'm going into it completely blind and it's incredible.
I'm just going to rub it on all of your faces.
I got to disconnect.
Ah, gotcha!
So the Army vaccine is, the news has come out that the Army has been testing a sort of mega vaccine for COVID that will be able to defeat all current and hopefully future variants of The virus, that this will be able to handle Delta and Omicron and whatever Omega, Gamma, whatever else might be down the pike, that this is something that is working on a baser level.
So the spike proteins that are changing in between the different variants, those changes won't impact this vaccine.
QAnon has decided that this is proof that, again, Trump is the greatest human being who has ever lived and that this was the actual fruit of the labor of Operation Warp Speed.
That all the bad vaccines we've seen before this Were the deep state fumbling around in the dark and flailing and putting out their deadly toxic poison vaccine that's bad and awful, and then Trump hoodwinked them by creating the army vaccine which is good and noble, but the really funny thing to me is that these QAnon promoters still
Do not have the balls to tell their audience to take the army vaccine because they know the word vaccine is so toxic and so deadly in their community that they just can't do it.
They cannot finish the story the way it has to finish, which is, okay, guys, Trump made the army vaccine and it stops all COVID always and forever once it gets FDA approved.
So we should take it and win.
They can't do that.
They can't say it because they know telling their audience, take a vaccine.
That's the surest way to get, like, just thrown off QAnon Island.
Just be excommunicated from the community.
Because it is like... They should just rebrand it.
They should call it Super Soldier Serum.
Oh, God!
It's just like, hey, here's... Would you like some of this Super Soldier Serum?
And they could be like, well, what does that do?
And it's like, it makes you 100% immune to the effects of COVID-19.
And then they're like, oh, that sounds pretty good.
And you're just like, it does sound pretty good.
Let's get you some of this super soldier syrup right now.
Yeah.
Chris Evans can be there shaking hands.
You can be like, I'm free to shake your hand because I've taken the syrup.
And they'll be like, oh my God, I want to be Captain America.
Except for the whole part where Captain America fights Nazis, because Nazis were probably the good guys in that war.
Can I just say that I want to do that without actually doing it?
Or even better, can I either say I want to do that or do it?
That'd be great.
In fact, can I kind of be a Nazi?
Is that allowed?
Is that on the table?
Is that a possibility?
Now, this gets even dumber and weirder when you actually get into the QAnon mindset about what's going on in our world.
Because on top of the Army vaccine being this really good thing that's going to save us all from the bad guys, the Omicron variant is actually something that Trump created during Operation Warp Speed To push out the deep state Delta variant, which is deadly and bad, because Omicron is incredibly contagious, incredibly viral, but it's also milder and it will hurt less people and give more people natural immunity.
And that was the first way that Trump was going to defeat COVID, was by creating this incredibly viral but also mild version of COVID.
But he also knew that the Deep State was eventually going to create a variant against his variant, which is why he had the army create a vaccine against all variants on top of the Omicron thing.
So if your head hurts and you want to lay down now as you're thinking about all this, trust me, I had to do that for a while myself.
Because this is the level of 90-dimensional madness chess they've been playing with the Omicron outbreak.
I missed that development.
So now that I've picked my job off the floor, the lore now is that Trump created Omicron to wipe out Delta.
Because it's more mild?
Yes, it's more contagious and more mild.
And this is how we're all going to get natural immunity.
Before the army vaccine came out, there were QAnon promoters that were just like, get Omicron, get COVID now because it's mild and it will give you natural immunity.
You won't need vaccinations.
Everything's great.
Just, just, just have an Omicron party.
Just like find someone who's contagious and just get in with them.
Just catch this really mild version of the virus.
That's such bad writing because that doesn't explain why Trump would be pro-vaccine.
What the narrative should be is that at some point Trump was allowed to pivot to actively promoting the vaccine because he needed data from gullible liberals.
Uh, who didn't know the secret code of take vaccine means not take vaccine?
So that way he could develop his super army virus that will destroy COVID once for all, and he did that at the expense of all these stupid liberals that he used as guinea pigs.
This is why if you ever decided to take the black pill of Sel-Altanol and become a QAnon promoter, you would probably be very successful at it.
So we need to have El's moral compass remain strong and sturdy in his chest and keep him pointed towards the light and the truth and not to the darkness.
The light and the truth of crypto.
Yes!
You know what?
My favorite crypto market is your brand here.
See how seamless it was?
I'll shoot for you!
Dogecoin, etc.
Yeah, I mean, hey, someone needs to make a crypto that's just literally called, like, Tulip Coin, just to really bring up that whole plight in ancient world history, and just see if anyone gets it.
But then it'll become such a meme, because people will get it, and they'll be, like, kidding on the square about it, and then Tulip Coin will become worth tons of money, and then you'll cash out, and it'll be worthless.
You know what we should do?
We should go old school and we should try to team up with the Freemasons for some sort of Freemason coin and really blow people's minds.
I'm like, what does it mean?
Lightbringer coin, just something that I don't want to call it Illuminati coin directly because
that would scare off too many of our potential customers.
But just something that's like just like sinister, but like mysterious and scary and edgy.
I think that could that could get us the clientele we're looking for.
Who would be our low-rent Matt Damon?
Could we get David Spade to shill our crypto?
I mean, what's he doing?
Army Hammer seems pretty weird.
We could probably convince him to do it.
We'll be one of the thousands of people who keeps giving that guy a shot despite the fact that Hollywood has rebuffed him so thoroughly.
The markets are just like, no thank you.
Army Hammer, hard pass!
We can get Armie Hammer, we can get MC Hammer, we can get Greg the Hammer Valentine.
There's a lot of hammers that are way past their prime that are looking for a quick buck that we could get in on Hammercoin.
That would be the greatest because Ipsy Hammer historically associated with like his one big hit song, the Ninja Turtles and bankruptcy.
I was like, I was like his name on a coin.
Anyway, long live the army vaccine.
I hope it works out.
I can't wait to shoot.
What they should do is roll it out with 6G.
I feel like that would really set people off.
They'd be like, oh my god, what are you talking about?
Dude, the reception's incredible.
Oh, the one last thing about the Omri vaccine that's awesome was in the notes, they talked about how it uses a soccer ball shaped protein to attach all these other different spikes to the soccer ball.
So that immediately brought QAnon's mind to the Helsinki press conference where Putin handed Trump a soccer ball.
So obviously they knew about what was going to happen with COVID and all this stuff.
So the soccer ball was a message, a hidden sign for the future.
And yeah, because these people will look for any connective tissue, no matter how tenuous, no matter how ridiculous and far-fetched, in order to make their corkboard and string connect and make them feel better about themselves.
Speaking of tenuous connective tissue, football, and COVID, my next headline is listed on my notes as Green Bay Sweep.
Which, again, because I know nothing, could be an Aaron Rodgers thing, and if so, fuck that guy.
And also if not, fuck that guy.
Operation Green Bay Sweep was apparently the codename that Steve Bannon gave to the 1-6 coup and the operation to get people on board with not certifying the election on January 6th.
Wow.
If you're like, if you're the mayor of Green Bay or whatever, you just gotta be out there just being like, what?
That's crazy.
That's not what it's called.
I don't know what anyone's talking about that's so wrong.
So, Peter Navarro, who is a Trump advisor, has apparently gotten out in front of this thing and has been telling everybody, oh yeah, this Green Bay Sweep thing was a plan Steve Bannon had hatched.
Our friends Rafael Cruz and representative neo-Nazi Paul Gosart were totally in.
They were cool with Operation Green Bay Sweep.
This was basically just an effort to reject the Electoral College certification.
I don't know how they thought this was going to work, because in order to have something like this happen, you need both houses of Congress to agree to it.
At the time, the Republicans, quote-unquote, controlled the Senate, because I don't think that Warnock and... God, I cannot remember the other guy who won.
It was Ossoff, yeah.
It was Ossoff and Warnock.
I don't think they'd been sworn in yet from the Georgia runoffs, so the Senate was like 49-48, or something to that effect.
But the Democrats controlled the House, and they were never going to sign off on an invalidation of the election.
So I don't understand why they thought Green Bay Sweep would have any chance to work, even if they had, quote-unquote, a hundred congressmen in favor of it.
Yes, I'm Mayor Eric Genrich, and I suggest we call it Operation Patriot Sweep.
Hey, let's call it the Belichick sweep, because they're the cheaters.
They're the people that try to win, even though they shouldn't.
Also, hey, QAnon does not believe in coincidences, so I do have to point out that the mayor of Green Bay, his name is Eric, like Eric from Dominion.
Think about it.
It's all connected.
Oh, man.
EFD.
Hammer coin to the moon, let's go!
And Steve Bannon apparently texted Peter Navarro on January 6th and said, quote, call the play, run the play.
So he was totally all in on this dumb football analogy for subverting American democracy and trying to stage this quote-unquote legal coup against This has been a tremendously bad year, marketing-wise, for Green Bay.
A lot of negative connotations in the headlines, if you were to search Green Bay on any given day for what's floating around the news cycle.
They're like, oh, they won a game of football, and what's this?
Like, association with coup to overthrow the government, or?
Interesting.
Or what's a, ooh, anti-vax player says, vaccination fake, Joe Rogan is a doctor.
Interesting.
I don't know.
So for better or worse, I had skimmed Navarro's book to see if there were If there was anything relevant to the to the stuff I've been looking at it and came across this passage and so he spells this out and I guess he says the goal wasn't to overturn the election.
And this is the quote.
He said the goal is to subject the ballots to careful scrutiny and investigation.
So I guess he wanted to essentially.
Delayed the certification so that they could do these forensic audits that they've been hyping.
And I think they mentioned Jovan Pulitzer or something in here somewhere.
They, you know, wanted to do the kinematic artifact detection and all that just insane nonsense that doesn't actually work.
Oh, this is this is something Alex Jones has talked about a bunch.
Is that on 1-6 that they were they were on the cusp Of getting Congress to have a 10-day deferment while they looked over the ballots in the six contested states that Trump thought he won in, but were certified even though they shouldn't have been.
And that this plan was about to work, that like literally Mike Pence was ready to send those electors back and call for this 10-day stay.
But then Antifa and the FBI broke into the Capitol All hell broke loose.
Everything went crazy.
And then the plane was quashed.
And then they certified the election at 2 in the morning.
And all this stuff.
When... I mean, it sounds like a Packers playoff run to me.
Am I right?
Yes!
Everyone's just like, look at him go!
It's gonna work out great.
It's flawless.
What a team.
And then they make the playoffs and poop all over themselves.
They're just like, maybe next time.
Yep.
Welcome to another NFC title game where Aaron Rodgers shits the bed yet again.
Such is the way of life.
Maybe if you're lucky, Tom Brady will let you hold one of his Super Bowl rings.
one of his innumerate Super Bowl rings.
But the...
So like that...
Mike Pence had come out that morning saying that he wasn't going to do anything.
That's...
That's where the riot happened, was Trump getting in front of a crowd and being like, sounds like Mike Pence is going to fuck this up.
I mean, we thought Mike Pence was a good guy and a team player and he was going to do what needed to be done.
It's looking like he's not going to do that now.
So maybe you guys need to run up to the Capitol and give him a little dose of courage.
Make him see the right play here is the Green Bay sweep.
And then the crowd's like, what does that even mean, Trump?
He's like, I don't know.
I didn't even say it.
Shut up.
I'm not talking to Bannon about a coup.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Just, just run up to the Capitol and do something.
It'll be great.
And so like that was, That's one of the myths they've created after the fact about what happened on 1-6 was that we weren't planning on decertifying the election.
We were just looking for a stage to resolve some questions we had with those ballots.
Yeah, we meant a thorough sweep of the ballot.
We didn't just want a Green Bay, Wisconsin sweep.
We also wanted a Michigan Detroit Lions sweep and an Arizona Cardinals sweep.
And I don't know what you do with Pennsylvania, because that's both Philadelphia and Pittsburgh.
So we have like a Steeler-Eagle hybrid amalgamation thing.
Steve Bannon just really respects the election integrity in Green Bay.
So when he orders a Green Bay sweep of some ballots, you know that he really means business.
He's like, we're gonna do this Green Bay style.
You damn right!
So yeah, all of their bullshit they've talked about when it comes to what happened on 1-6 is that they had a multitude of dumb different plans they were gonna try to Put into place, but none of them are going to work because Mike Pence directly said, look, I'm just going to, I'm just going to certify the election.
I have no other options.
That's the only thing I can do under the 12th amendment.
So what are you going to do about it?
Stage a riot and have people breaking down the doors of Congress chanting, hang Mike Pence slash slash cut to that exactly happening.
And it'd be like, Oh, I guess they are going to just try to kill me.
Cause I won't go along with their plan.
That's my favorite part of this whole thing is that Mike Pence is like such a squish that like literally Trump tried to have him killed and he's like still on the media being like, I respect President Trump.
I love my time serving under him.
It was a great administration.
Those people were chanting, hang with Pence, not hang Mike Pence.
They just wanted to spend time with the guy because they like, you know, he's like Trump's buddy.
So when they showed up on their sightseeing tour, they were just like, we want to hang with Pence!
Go find him so we can fist bump.
Yes, 100%.
That was all they were going to do with their fists and him.
So I think I'm going to go make sure he's plugged in somewhere.
And that mother will let him hang out with us.
That man still, he's just like proof that cyborg technology exists and people are using it right now.
I just love the stories that when Trump had the really bad COVID and was like on death's door, nobody told Pence.
Like literally, he was totally in the dark that he was potentially like moments away from becoming the president, like out of nowhere.
Like, he's just like, dum-ba-dum, I know Trump's in the hospital, but they say he'll be fine, and then someone runs up to Pence and goes, Trump's dead, you're the president, and he's like, blah?
That's a thing that happens.
He didn't need to tell him shit about COVID, he's an android.
Yes!
Like, he can't catch the virus, and if he needs to, they'll just download the president program instead of the vice president program.
I think we may have even talked about this on the podcast at some point, I may have said that exact same thing.
I'm getting Matrix-style déjà vu.
So like, what is real and stuff?
Alice, etc.
Well, I think that covers the news of the week, so let's get into the mailbag.
Our listeners got questions, we got answers.
It's time for Q&A.
So, Reverend Xenofact opens up the week by saying, what's the chance the GQP goes anti-vax, period, and when does it become widespread among electeds to actual party platform?
I don't know how strong anti-vax can be as a, like, national party goal, because, I mean, most of Americans have gotten the vaccine.
I don't know that this plays well with a large constituent, but I think in, like, really blood-red districts, like, Paul Gosar, it's like a lunatic who's anti-vax, because he's in a Republican plus-30 district, so he can say that shit.
Well, let me serve back at you with a grim alternative take.
Maybe it's a brilliant thing to run on because it allows people from many different ethnic backgrounds still rally under a pure blood like banner.
You know what I mean?
That the righteousness that just comes to just be like, yeah, we're united by blood.
But in this case, it could be the precious blood of the unvaccinated.
Unvaccinated sperm is going to be the next Bitcoin.
I read that on a sign somewhere.
I think that's possible, but I also think that minority outreach is one thing that when you're on Gab and Telegram and stuff like that, you see how just there's immediate aggressive pushback against that from the people on those sites.
I remember seeing someone talking about, it was like Ted Cruz was like, my stance on immigration is legal yes, illegal no.
And then an Asian guy on Gab was like, go to hell Ted Cruz, no immigration!
And then Andrew Torbaugh, who's Italian, was like, I agree with the Asian guy, no immigration ever!
And it was just like, you people do understand that you're not like native born.
You're not Native Americans, nor can you tie your ancestry to the Mayflower or any shit like that.
You're all immigrants of some type or another, so this is ridiculous that you're saying these things.
And there's like, nope, just militant racist idiots.
You know what matters anymore?
What matters is the purity of our unvaccinated blood.
Oh God, I would love for them to go that far.
We are the people from before the time when you guys all lined up to get your DNA all altered.
I'm signing up for real, real humanity here, bruv.
Why am I playing for this team?
I should be playing for the other team and making money.
I could be selling hammer coin right now.
Oh, it seems really easy to me.
I'm not gonna lie.
It is easy.
If you've ever seen an incredibly lazy q&a promoter on telegram, they just like spam a bunch, they get like 20 30,000 followers.
And then they just started selling their audience crypto.
It's awesome.
I mean, it's just so Transparently, obviously a scam.
And all you need to know is a few magic words in the QAnon universe and boom, you're in.
You're there.
You're all set.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm truly not looking forward to what the algorithm has in store for me after every device in my house has heard me say the word crypto or NFT like a trillion times today.
They're gonna be trying to sell me the weirdest shit.
Do you want this picture of the thing?
It's yours.
Yeah, oh, so many board apes are gonna be in your timeline.
You have no idea.
Get your custom gun barrel at the new Battlefield game.
But thanks. So.
So, Trapezoid, do you have any views on how the Republicans are gonna handle being anti-vax?
Uh, no, I mean, you guys covered, I mean, I think most of what I would have to add.
It's, I mean, I don't know, it seems like the entire party is kind of going with whatever is going to get them the most attention and clicks.
So I think if they find that it's going to be advantageous for them to go that route, they will.
It seems like everyone's basically Just following the trends.
And I mean, it's like Cambridge Analytica all over again, where they're looking at data and they're like, okay, yeah, people are really going to love this anti-vaxx shit.
So they, they're going to double down on that or whatever it takes.
It doesn't seem like anyone actually cares anymore.
They have absolutely no soul in your eyes and they're just doing whatever they, whatever soulless thing they think we'll do, we'll get them votes.
So there's no actual principles behind any of this.
It's all, yeah, votes and money.
Yeah.
Oh, absolutely.
The Republican Party is just nothing more than the attaining and consolidating of power.
That's all they care about.
Like, literally, that's it.
And we all know the Democrats hate votes and money.
Yes.
So thank you for that incredibly bleak question, Reverend Xenofact.
Klutz Zero asks, given that Trump is seen as part of the vaccine establishment, do you think he will be the 2024 Republican nominee or will they find someone relatively anti-vax?
I mean, if he fucking bangs that drum hard enough and this army vaccine becomes a real thing
Like they come out with a shot that literally just obliterates kovat overnight then yeah, I feel like people
Would be feeling pretty strong if Trump were to try to take credit for that one
Because it would just give them a positive thing to rally behind again
Like right now Trump kind of just has nothing like aside from the fact that he is Trump like, you know
The wall thing nobody gives a shit about because of kovat or whatever and the failure of it so far
So he would just like it like if he could just take credit for a big win like yeah
The that shot was by a dude It was my idea the whole time.
Like, you have me on tape saying that I love the vaccine several times.
Remember that?
I did that because I'm Trump and I'm a genius.
And then the Republicans can be like, yeah, he did make the shot that killed COVID.
Yeah, it's really funny because you have the hardcore anti-vax, anti-Trump side of the media.
I saw Cernovich post a thing where he's like, I never want this man in public life again after Trump came out in favor of the booster.
And there are a bunch of, like, QAnon-adjacent, like, shitheads in the Republican Party that are very mad at Trump's pro-vaccine stance.
I've seen a bunch of people talk about how they prefer DeSantis to Trump.
But the problem for any other candidate is that No matter how aggressively pro-vaccine Trump is, QAnon will always make apologies for him.
They will always make excuses for why what he's saying is actually nine-dimensional chess, and he doesn't actually like the vaccines, and he doesn't want us to actually take them.
He's just saying this for the normies.
Like, literally anybody else.
If like Ron DeSantis, like, Was railing against mandates and railing against this, that and the other thing.
But, uh, I remember someone asked him if he had taken the booster and he reacted like the, uh, interviewer had asked him if he had stopped beating his wife yet.
And he like freaked out about it.
And he knows that he can't say that he took the booster because that will hurt his bona fides with, uh, the, the, his lunatic base.
And the only guy who can say that shit and get away with it is Trump.
Cause these, these people are hook, line and sinker on him.
He's the Messiah.
He's the prince that was promised.
He's the one who will bring balance to the force.
So, I think it's going to be really hard for the Republican Party to find an anti-vaxxer who has the mainstream credibility to beat Trump on that end.
And they're never going to be able to find an anti-vaxxer who's going to be able to crush Trump from that side.
Because the most hardcore anti-vaxxers out there are QAnon, and they're giving him a mulligan.
I remember one guy said that he's like, this vaccine is a deep state plot to depopulate the world, and Trump supporting it makes me mildly disappointed in him.
I just love that.
Mildly disappointed.
Trump is a genocidal sociopath.
I'm mildly disappointed in him.
Like, I'm just a little upset that he's supporting the Gates-Soros plan to kill us all.
Like, but if Trump gives me a tummy rub, I'll get over it.
It'll be okay.
We'll be all good.
It's a weird place for them to draw that line.
I mean, it's not weird in an unexpected way.
It was completely expected.
But when you step back and really think about the things that they could criticize or be upset over, this is the one.
Right.
They always talk about how QAnon's about bringing world peace to the world and Trump's the peace president.
They could have got mad about all the arms deals he did with Saudi Arabia and the atrocities in Yemen.
But nope, that all goes down the memory hole.
The only thing they're debating is the vaccines.
Mike, how are you going to hug anything if you don't have arms?
He's the president of peace.
He brought you more arms with which to hug your neighbor.
This is very true.
That's what Trump's all about.
He's all about peace and incredibly effective vaccines that he secretly doesn't want you to take.
You just need to read through the lines and see that he's just doing that to trick the libs because that's what he's all about.
Trump is all about the subtext.
The man is not literally just a shrieking, screaming, gibbering lunatic who says exactly what he's thinking at all times with no filter.
I don't think there's ever going to be a Jonestown movement.
The Nerdy Horror Fan asks, will the Q movement finally enter its Jonestown ending next
year?
If it doesn't, uh,
if it does, and if it doesn't,
what is next for the Q and Q and Nonsense crowd?
I don't think there's ever gonna be a Jonestown movement.
I think that's way overblown.
The, I think there's always a danger of lone wolf violence.
I think there's always the danger of people hurting themselves or others.
But there's not going to be a mass movement to do something like that.
I mean, the scariest thing right now is the idiots telling each other to get Omicron.
Even that.
I haven't seen anyone actually listen to that advice.
I haven't seen people say, oh I got Omicron and it was no big deal.
It was no nothing.
Go out and get it yourself.
So I think hoping for a massive fireball of death at the end, that's not what's going to happen.
Because these grifters need their audience alive to make money off them.
They're running a scam, and that scam doesn't work if you depopulate your own audience.
So they'll sell them horse paste, they'll sell them hydroxychloroquine, they'll sell them zinc and vitamin D. But They're going to cut their losses at a certain point.
They're not going to tell people to storm the Capitol.
I mean, El has always talked about it, where it's like, try it.
Try an armed rebellion.
Try a civil war.
See how it works out.
See what the payoff is.
Because that won't work.
And they know that.
It's the same reason why they will tell their audience that the voting is hopelessly rigged, but keep voting anyways.
On some level, they know they're lying.
On some level, they know they're bullshitting, and they need Republicans to get back in the power to sell more opium to people.
Devolution and all the other bullshit they're selling to people, it has a shelf life.
This stuff isn't going to work out.
If Biden wins re-election in 2024, their heads are going to explode.
They're never going to be able to tolerate that.
So they need a Republican daddy, who they prefer to be Trump.
They prefer that guy back in power ASAP so they can get around to lying about Hillary Clinton being arrested any day now.
That's the shit they're trying to sell their audience.
And they're not going to tell their audience to do something stupid that's going to shorten their lifespans any more than the COVID misinformation already is.
It's not going to get worse than that, I don't think.
Wow, Mike is like a top.
You spin him up, and he'll just go.
Sometimes he'll just hit like all like he'll meander around but he'll hit all the notes like a Beyblade
Essentially like the only thing that I would personally add is that
There is always a small chance that in any sort of like personality based cult system like this that there's at
least an offshoot That gets dangerous in that way like the negative 48 thing
So yeah, I mean, those just like you got to monitor those situations because they could get bad.
But yeah, I don't think it's going to be like a And now all QAnon followers, time to go to the comet, so to speak, if you get what we're saying.
Everybody get your flavored sugar drink ready.
Wink nudge.
Like, I don't think that's going to go down.
Yeah, that's where I was going, or what I was thinking about that, too.
I was like, yeah, I don't think the movement as a whole, but yeah.
Negative 48 seems like they're getting dangerously close.
That entire situation seems Just sad, really.
And I think, like, now that Q is decentralized after disappearing, and we're seeing, like, infighting between, like, Flynn and Linwood, that, like, there's these Offshoots and branching situations happening where maybe, you know, some people will end up following some adherent, you know, down some like dark path.
But I don't think as a whole.
Yeah, I agree with you guys.
I don't think as a whole it's going to head that way.
Here's a question from me, your friend L. Do we ever think that any of these like Splinter Q things tries to work itself into like an actual startup religion?
I have seen people doing something like that, something akin to it, where you use the Q-drops and the stuff that Q told us as a way to reinterpret the Bible and to try to understand Christianity through the lens of Q.
And I think that's a really good way to run a scam, because you're just like actually totally immersing Christianity into the QAnon nonsense, and that lets you use the credibility of Christ and God in your community's eyes, so you're willing to stick it out longer.
Because I see so many of these QAnon promoters, the longer Trump doesn't go back into office, the longer COVID still exists.
They more and more like wean away from Trump or Q saving the day and they're like, you know who's going to save the day?
God.
And the quicker you get to God in the scam, the more likely you are to hold people in the scam.
Because, I mean, when you're a cynical atheist like me, religion's the biggest scam in the world.
It's the oldest trick in the book.
So why would you not, like, try to get to the destination as fast as possible while maintaining as many of your followers as possible?
Good stuff.
I mean, it's obviously not good stuff.
I genuinely never had that thought before that moment where I was just like, oh my god, what are the chances that some of these people decide to stop going cult with it and start going like, we're like a more organized attempt at a religion.
Yeah.
I forget if it was Marc-Andre Argentino.
I forget who it was, but I know there was one QAnon researcher who actually infiltrated that group and was on their live streams as they were proselytizing that way.
I'm sure those people are incredibly scary and also really successful at their scam.
So yeah, that sucks.
Yeah, they should cut us in.
We need to figure out a way to make money off these people.
Hammer coin!
We had a vision.
We had a vision that Jesus told us about hammer coin.
So get on that.
I'll try to get in touch with Arby Harry's people.
Your boy's not doing so hot in 2021.
Is there any chance that he would like to endorse this totally legit wink crypto coin?
Wink, wink.
So Pancake Peasant asks, have people close to you been pilled?
I have not met anyone who sort of like fell down the path of QAnon.
Me and Elle have a common friend who went down the rabbit hole of conspiracy theories that we talk about to this day, so that's like where we were.
I think the closest thing that ever happened to me was I had a friend talk to me about the Wayfair child trafficking thing.
And immediately I just replied back to them and told them it's bullshit.
There's nothing to it.
And they started fighting back with me.
And me and another person in the group text spent the next like three hours talking that person down and walking them off the cliff of the Wayfair child trafficking conspiracy theory.
And at the end of that period of time, they realized that they were being, like, just freaking out, because they were expecting a child soon, and that was, like, poisoning their mind, and all that stuff, and they realized that we were telling them the truth, and the Wayfarer thing was all bullshit, but that was like... At least there's an excuse for it.
I imagine a world where you did that, and at the end of it, they're just like...
Guys, I'm sorry.
I've just been so bored recently.
I'm just really bored.
No, man, we get it.
It's cool.
Like, we understand.
We all get really bored sometimes.
Yeah, we all get really bored and decide that it would really spice up our lives to believe that Wayfair is trafficking children.
Yeah.
So yeah, I have not had anyone act like- I've run into people who've been pilled.
I had a co-worker who was aggressively pilled and my days at work when that guy was proselytizing QAnon were very much like Bruce Wayne watching the Joker rob a bank and he just can't like dip out and put on the Batman suit and try to stop it.
Because I just didn't want to start that shit in front of everybody in ye olde casino.
Personally, in my circle of friends and family, I have not had that happen.
My dad ended up semi-pilled, which surprised me.
He's typically been left-leaning, and he immigrated from Iran in the 70s and, you know, has mostly supported Democrats, but There was a bit of queue intersection with Iranian social media activity, especially because a lot of Iranians appreciate Trump's hardline stance on Iran, actually, more so than, you know, the approach the Democrats typically take.
Uh, you know, because my dad was in Iran pre-revolution and remembered what it was like there.
And he, he really doesn't like the, the mullahs that are in control now.
And, uh, so to him, Trump's approach of essentially, you know, strong arming them out of power and, and putting heavy sanctions and, and not giving them any slack was, was the right way.
And he started to kind of go down the conspiracy path of, well, the election was stolen from Trump and, you know, he, The Iranian government had some hand in it and really kind of going on these fringe, going down these fringe paths, which surprised me.
I definitely picked up hints of QAnon intersection, but he hasn't been, I wouldn't say he's fully Q-pilled, but he does think the election was stolen.
He thinks that, you know, Trump would have won and all of that.
So that was really wild for me.
Yeah, he thought the Ayatollah was in on it.
Yeah, yeah.
Same thing with COVID, actually.
He thought that Iran was involved with that, too.
I sympathize, to an extent, because the current Iranian regime that's been in place since the revolution is not great, and I understand wanting to see them gone, and I understand that they've done terrible things.
You know, you can't assign everything that happens to them in some weird, convoluted way.
It's just like, unfortunately, a grim reminder on how these things like play.
Specifically, like, through the lens of each person's personal perception.
Like, if you already have a boogeyman, the conspiracy just sort of contours itself to point to, like, if you're already biased against China, for instance, well, then the coronavirus becomes a bioweapon.
You know, like, you see it, like, with some Blue Anon stuff, you see it with the Russian interference, like, Stuff like that, the Russian Psy-Op stuff.
It's just like, if you've already got a boogeyman in mind, you can conform your opinions to point in that direction.
Yeah.
All roads lead to the big bad that I hate.
When all you have is a hammer coin, everything is a nail.
Exactly, boo!
We're gonna have to clip that.
That's gonna be in our trailer.
Oh man, that's gonna be so great.
We are going to become crypto rich after this podcast.
It's going to be so good.
See, the crypto market is so easy, guys.
What are you going to do with your millions of dollars?
I'm so excited.
I can't wait.
We're going to get Elon to plug HammerCoin.
It's going to be so good.
TheLeftIsDead asks a question that is perfect right now.
Who is shilling the coolest products on the right right now?
The answer is us.
We're shilling the coolest products on the right this week.
Hammer coin! The thing is, is that all these people very much stay in their own lanes.
I mean, banning over crypto coin, that's a scam.
Prang Medic, like, it is so funny to me what Prang Medic is doing right now because he is just like basically out of QAnon.
Like, every now and then he'll make a little post where he's like, Guys, the reason why I'm not talking about politics right now is because everyone's already said everything that needs to be said, and I'm just not gonna beat that dead horse.
I'm gonna tell you how you can heal your torn rotator cuff instantly through the power of prayer.
Like, he's...
We've got this massive QAnon audience and now he's just trying to pivot hard into faith healing and just wanting to sell people faith healing books and courses and all that shit.
And all the other grifters like Jordan Sather's all about that wellness stuff.
He's got his $32 cans of coffee that he never stopped making fun of.
It's always on brand, the shit these people are selling.
They always have something that is like, oh yeah, you're the fake Christian guy who's really religious, so of course you're selling faith healing.
You're the vaccines are bad guy, so of course you're selling alternative health medicine.
Like, you're 107, so you're just saying anything to anyone in order to make a buck, so you can drive a Bentley and make Jordan Sather really mad that his $32 cans of coffee can't get him a Bentley.
So, I'll be really interested to see if anyone tries to break into a different field.
Does anyone in We The Media or any of those people, do they try to go crypto?
Does anyone try to like make a move like that?
I'm sure like Dirtbag's like in the Matrix and the like.
They got, he has no qualms.
He'll do anything for a buck, that guy.
So Matrix coin coming out soon.
Oh God, it's like a Bitcoin, but it's got green squiggly lines flowing down the screen.
It's gonna be worth trillions.
It's gonna be so good.
Oh yeah, at some point we have to decide when it's okay to talk about Matrix spoilers, because I have some Q related questions about the new Matrix movie that I have to write by you, our resident expert on things Matrix and Q. Well, I mean, I would say the next, because we have the holiday episode that we're working on for after this week, so I would say the next time we have the full crew on the show would probably be like fair game.
That's about a month since the movie came out, so.
Fair enough.
So, I guess that brings us to our question of numerous, which is, what are you looking forward to?
Let's start with Trapezoid.
What am I looking forward to?
In 2022?
In general?
Just in general, man.
Just in general.
This is an open-ended question.
I'm looking forward to not being online around New Year's week.
I need to just sign the hell off and not... I need to disconnect.
I need to pull an L and just disconnect and be blissfully ignorant and not know about Let's Go Brandon Dad or Green Bay Sweeps and just bury my head in a book or a video game or I highly recommend it.
I've been finally getting caught up on Ted Lasso.
Why is nobody talking about that show?
It's so weird.
It's very good.
It's an underground success.
You're the first person that's brought Ted Lasso to my attention.
I'm going to have to check it out.
Indy Darling, Ted Lasso.
Yes.
So Trapezoid is going to decompress.
What are you looking forward to, Al?
Ooh, I mean, I guess I'm technically looking forward to this trip I have next week, but that's sort of cancelled out by the fact that I'm not super looking forward to having to travel.
It's going to be my first time on an airplane during the pandemic, and there's just no way around it.
Um, if I want to do this thing, uh, which was planned before Omicron starts spiking up.
So, uh, I've got me a test tomorrow.
I'm gonna go take a big boy test and, uh, make sure that I'm good for flying.
Uh, but provided that the travel ends up being safe and everything is safe and cool, I am looking forward to this trip.
It's incredibly vague, but I'm going down to a fun convention-style thing for a while.
It's my one being reckless.
I'm cashing in two years of being reckless equity to finally do a thing during the Rona time, because it's been pretty good so far.
And aside from that, I'm excited to finally be getting caught up on a bunch of TV and movies and stuff.
I've been alternating between watching Ted Lasso and the Demon Slayer Mugen Train arc, and at some point I'm going to start working on some like Squid Game or other, like some Witcher 2 or Witcher Season 2.
There's a bunch of stuff I need to watch, so I'm going to continue to do that.
Not pay attention to the internet as much.
Which is for the best.
It's for everyone's mental health.
It is absolutely for the best to not be as terminally online as I am.
I'm looking forward to playing Dead Cells because one of my friends just beat me over the head with a drum about how he really enjoyed the game and it's like a 2D scroller like Metroid with the roguelike mechanics of Hades.
And I was like, OK, I'll look at it.
And then it was like 15 bucks on Steam.
So I'm like, sold.
Done.
In.
So... I played Dead Cells.
It's very good.
It's not as good as Hades.
Unfortunately, Hades came out and ate that whole genre's lunch.
But it's still really good.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
So I'm gonna... I've died a couple of times playing it.
So I'm gonna just...
Hang out, play some Dead Cells, which will probably lead me back into playing more Hades, because I think after 120 hours of Hades, I finally burned out on it.
But Dead Cells might get me back in there to finish the few quests I hadn't completed on the scroll of Minor Prophecies.
So, that is what I'm looking forward to, just trying out a new game that seems interesting.
And also, at some point, I'll probably have to go see Spider-Man, because everybody and their mother is telling me it's incredible.
Yeah, it is really good.
I had a lot of fun.
The 100% approval rating I'm hearing for Spider-Man, unlike my controversial opinion that The Matrix was good, which apparently ruffled a lot of feathers on the internet.
I was like, whoa!
I had no idea!
I don't know what people were expecting.
I mean, it's the best Matrix sequel for sure, right?
Right!
That was my take on it.
The movies 2 and 3 were like a 4 out of 10 on my scale, easily.
They were bad.
So I went into this movie with very low expectations, and I came away with a 7 out of 10.
It knocked my socks off.
If I had gone into the movie expecting a 10 out of 10, I would have felt much different about it.
Someone said it had very small shoes to fill, and it did that.
It filled those small shoes.
Yeah, it filled those tiny baby shoes.
The bar was so low you could stumble over it.
Yes.
It's time for us to strap on our tiny baby roller skates and roller skate ourselves out of Hellworld for the week.
Before we get out of here, though, once again, I would like to say a big thank you to Trapezoid for joining us.
Is there anything in particular you want to push or any place in particular people can find you on the Internet if they want more of your sweet, sweet opinions about this wacky Hellworld we live in?
Yeah, best place is Twitter.
I'm at twitter.com.
I don't need to tell you guys the URL for Twitter.
I'm at get underscore innocuous, or if you search Trapezoid of Discovery, I'm sure it'll come up.
I also have a substack at trapezoid.news that I push to occasionally.
And yeah, thank you guys for having me.
This has been a blast.
Really, really enjoyed it and appreciate, Michael, or Boger, all the work you do.
Thank you so much for the kind words and for filling in for Sarge who's got holiday obligations.
We like to think that he's being bagged and brought to Gitmo for the week or whatever.
That's his holiday vacation because he's a deep state military plant that talks to us on the radio and they need to make sure they've got him properly programmed.
He says menacingly, punching his other hand as if the audience could see such a thing.
I've been doing that a lot recently.
Anyway, thank you so much for listening to this, uh, another successful, question mark, episode of the Adventures in Hell World podcast.
If you would like to continue to support the show, the easiest way to do so is to continue to listen and to get
other people to listen.
But you can also give us a five-star review wherever your podcasts are provided.
Or if you have some money and you would like to give it to us, we would be very grateful for you to do such a thing.
And you can do that at patreon.com slash PokerPolitics.
Anybody who donates at the $5 and above tier gets access to a bunch of bonus content,
including Kabalin, The Foulest Deed, and the currently ongoing What We Do Out of Shadows series of mini-episodes,
as well as other random stuff. A big assortment of bonus content in the pipeline there.
And we'd like to thank this week's beautifuller baby, Sasha M., for joining the crew.
Hopefully, Sasha, you were enjoying what we do out of shadows.
It was a lot of fun recording those episodes, the ones that have been trickling out during the holiday season for y'all.
If you have money and you don't want to give it to us, we totally understand.
Do some good with it by donating it to love146.org, an organization whose vision is the end of child trafficking and exploitation.
Hard to argue with that.
As always, we'd like to thank DJ Minimal Effort for providing our intro song.
It still gets better every time I hear it.
If you would like to visit the voice artist friend of ours, Frosty, who is our voice of Cuba when we need it, but also our content warning and all of our bumps, you can find them on Twitter, at FrostyBO.
Sarge and I have a pop media podcast that we do, sort of a spin-off to this one, where we get to talk more in-depth about our dumb movie and TV pop culture references.
You can find that wherever you get your podcasts, at BingeWerdy, that's B-I-N-G-E-W-O-R-D-Y, and on Twitter, at BingeWerdy, spelled the same way.
So, thank you guys very much for listening to this week's special guest star episode with Trapezoid, Saito Goff for Trapezoid, and myself, the Mysterious L, and our wonderful expert in all things QAnon crazy, Mr. Mike Rains.
