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Feb. 10, 2021 - Adventures in HellwQrld
01:34:00
Adventures In HellwQrld Episode 21: Second Impeachment and Old QDrops Return!

That scoundrel Trump got himself impeached again, will the Senate find the nerve to convict him? Almost assuredly not. While that's all happening we also go back to the old drops as we head towards QDrop 72 and the end of the story Q was trying to tell. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Time Text
Hello, everybody.
Welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
I am Poker and Politics, a.k.a.
Mike Rains, and I am joined, as always, by Sarge.
Hello from the internet.
And the mysterious Elle.
Hello, my beautiful babies!
So this week we have the wonders of second impeachment.
It's like the Hobbits asking for a double breakfast and all that kind of stuff.
Only it's our terribly evil former president and Congress's inability to reprimand him for his litany of crimes.
When he gets arrested in New York State it will be elevensies.
Or Georgia.
We do have breaking news out of Georgia also that they're looking into him.
That's brunch, baby.
This impeachment isn't going to go anywhere because there's so many senators that if they convict him in impeachment, they indict themselves.
Well, but, I mean, you know, I was going to start something here and then I realized I don't have anything, so... Well done, me!
Holly and Cruz are both, like, indictable if Trump gets impeached, and they're effectively on his jury.
Yes.
Everyone's making fun of how bad his lawyers are, but it doesn't matter how bad your lawyers are if you've already bought the jury off.
So before we get even deeper into the weeds on this stuff, we have to talk about the fact that QAnon is terrible and bad and could offend people.
Yeah, so I don't have to slam on the brakes on any more of my jokes.
Give it to me.
The Adventures in Hellworld podcast talks in depth about QAnon, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse and violence against people.
Listener discretion advised.
So, now that you have been warned about what we're going to be talking about, as it were, if you wish to support the podcast, you can always do that by... Now that you've been warned about our talking about pedophilia, if you'd like to support us, here we go!
Yes!
That is... Have we said every week we're going to do this together?
Wow, what a...
The smoothest transition you could possibly imagine.
Anyways, sorry, you go ahead and take that one from the top.
I apologize for interrupting you.
No problem!
My brains mastered the transition.
No, just eight weeks of that being the sequence of events, and this is the week that Elle just goes, oh my god, we're monsters!
And it's like, yeah, we are.
We are.
We've never hid from it.
But if you're willing to tolerate our crippling unprofessionalism, please support us either by telling people about the podcast and what we're doing.
And if you've got money to give us, go to patreon.com slash PokerPolitics.
Help us out by throwing a few dollars our way.
We have cleared up the issues with Amazon getting us our Popguards.
and headphones, so that will hopefully be leading to more professionalism starting next week.
If us bunch of chuckle fucks aren't worthy of your money, and Lord knows
with this introduction, how could we be?
Please give that money to love146.org who actually do the work that QAnon
always talks about when it comes to fighting human trafficking and saving
children, which because Donald Trump isn't the president anymore, suddenly
QAnon doesn't care about kids anymore.
They're just all, Trump's going to come back one magical day all the time.
I'm trying desperately not to say, man, we're off to a good start this week, because I feel like I say that every week, and if we're either always non-sarcastically off to a good start, or always sarcastically off to a good start, I feel like it doesn't need to be brought up every time.
Now it's meta, because you brought up you bringing it up.
Oh shit, I'm like the WandaVision of podcast hosts.
Topical reference!
Yeah, see, not all of my references are Turboteen.
Turboteen!
Yeah, see, sometimes when we podcast, I say things into the microphone that's just for me, even though we have a listener base, a small listener base, and dedicated, and we love you guys.
But yeah, sometimes me shouting Turboteen is just for my own personal enjoyment.
This podcast is no longer kosher because that reference was ham-fisted.
I had the joke.
I had to use it.
Hey, grown music, you were like, that is my thing, buddy.
Oh man, the need for a soundboard grows by the weekend.
I feel like we'd go bad with power.
We'd immediately just be like, wow, that's new crew.
Like, it would be 20 minutes of us talking, over 40 minutes of us playing drops.
On the soundboard it has a plastic case over the air horn button for emergencies only.
You just have to flip it up.
Us in that space guy uniform just sweating, wiping his brow, like two buttons.
One that says air horn and one that says fart noise.
What's the drop?
What's so tough?
I have no idea.
Is WAF still a thing?
When I grew up on the North Shore in Massachusetts, the local alternative rock station was WAF, and they had a zoo crew.
They were the only one I ever listened to, because for whatever reason, I just listened to that station when I went to sleep.
So when I woke up, it would just be like, they'd be like, things in the news!
Fart noise!
Yeah!
Cool!
Uh, mine was Johnny Dare.
And, uh, God, I just remember him talking about... Not doing drugs?
Uh, no, he definitely did those.
So he wasn't Johnny Acronym Dare, he was Johnny Regular Dare?
Yeah, I think that was his actual last name.
I just remember vividly him talking about Going out, and his dog had been eating his bar money, so, like, he was kicking dog turds to find, like, five dollar bills.
That is... I mean, that is a powerful impulse to drink some beer.
Literally pouring through your dog's shit to get beer money.
That is like the worst World of Warcraft quest I've ever heard.
Oh my god.
Anyway, Johnny Deere is dead to us.
Now we're the new people talking about shit.
And that shit is Q. And I think we have a bump here for Q's in the news.
What's everyone's favorite death cult been up to this past week?
It's time for Q's in the news!
Maybe if I get like one or two hundred of these podcasts under my belt, I'll stop referring to drops and bumps interchangeably.
It'll be nice.
It'll be great to be professional one of these days.
One day we'll be a real boy.
I mean, are we supposed to fake it until we make it?
Maybe we should stop calling out how unprofessional we are.
We should just lower people's expectations that this is the bar of professionalism now in the podcasting community.
I mean, if we just always call it out, eventually it becomes ironic, right?
Yeah.
I mean, we need to call up Alanis.
She's the foremost irony expert.
Yes.
When is somebody else going to make a song about irony to finally take that bitch down?
Someone needs to make a song that's actually ironic and that's the whole point of the song is to just like knock Alanis down a peg or two because her song actually wasn't ironic.
The chorus is just, fuck Alanis Morissette.
Don't you think?
This is what Broadway really is!
I feel like, despite the fact I used the word bitch there for that goob, I feel like I should let it say, for the record, it shall forever stand, that Elle loves Alanis Morissette.
Alanis Morissette totally slays.
Jagged Little Pill was a great album.
And I hear it makes a pretty good Broadway show.
Yeah.
Anyway, none of this is about Q's or the news.
What's wrong with us?
So what is going on in the news, Mike?
Tell us.
So very much is wrong with us, but Q and the world are watching with bated breath as Donald Trump gets ready to be acquitted in his latest impeachment.
We had opening testimony or opening statements from prosecutors and Trump's bumbling defense attorneys, of which literally the best thing you could say about what Trump's defense did was it was a teachable moment about Orthodox Judaism.
Because one of his lawyers would cover his head while he was drinking, which is a practice Orthodox Jews perform, and it led to a lot of people being really confused by why he was doing it, and then people had to explain that.
As for his actual legal arguments, at one point he was like, hey, if Trump's actually guilty, why don't you arrest him?
To which most of America was like, yeah, we should do that.
That sounds like a great idea, buddy.
That's what I want in my defense attorney.
Sure, my client might be guilty, but if he was so guilty, why wouldn't you lock him up?
Oh, okay, I guess we'll just go do that.
It's like, oh no!
How many questions like that are on the bar exam?
Should you throw your client directly under the bus by claiming that they deserve to be arrested while giving your defense?
Why slash N?
I read several reports that Trump was red-faced and screaming at the TV, and I, in a weird way, I miss him having Twitter.
Like, he would be just on, he, I mean, it just would have been an endless tear the last week.
Oh, there was, there was this really funny thing I saw from one Q non-promoter that was just like, I miss Trump on Twitter.
And I was just thinking to myself, like, you're not missing like the whole mass arrests or the free money or the cure for cancer.
No, you're just sad that Trump isn't on Twitter owning libs.
I mean, that's, that's what you're, that's what, that's what's getting your goat here.
Yeah, I saw someone being like, he was, he was not a good president, but he was great at trolling the libs.
And it's like, that's, I guess I'm glad you admitted he's a bad president.
But that is not who I want leading my nation, somewhat a Twitter troll.
Yeah, it was our boy, the guy who's now cloud-chasing me for audience because he's not allowed on Twitter anymore, Major Dad.
He said, if someone can explain to me Bruce Castro's strategy right now, I'd appreciate it.
WTF is he doing?
So you know when the Anons are like, Trump's lawyer is doing a bad job.
Those guys have the lowest bar imaginable.
Like, Trump's lawyer could get up in front of the Senate and say, Trump good!
Libs bad!
Oh my god!
I'm astonished that any Q supporter can still feel the sensation of confusion.
Like, I mean, after all this point.
Like, what does it take to confuse these people?
Everything they believe in is a lie.
And in a horribly convoluted disjointed lie where they're just like literally swinging from vine to vine trying to find any connection between things.
One of the early Q-drops that we went over talks about how on Friday and Saturday the promise of MAGA will be fulfilled.
I saw a guy rehashing that Q-drop and he prefaced it by saying, look, I'm not saying, I'm just saying, and then just got into it about how this is going to be the Friday and Saturday where the big payoff happens three and a half years later.
Because context is meaningless.
And if you just pluck the words Friday and Saturday out of an ancient cue drop, it could be this Friday and Saturday.
Don't you think?
Maybe?
Who knows?
Who could know?
Who are you to say that it's not going to be this Friday and Saturday?
Right, who are you?
It's nice of Q to never really give concrete dates, except for the times when he did, so that everything can be interpreted however they want.
It doesn't matter if they're all idiots.
Yeah, it seems like Q learned their lesson about actually putting a date stamp on it shortly after they fucked up that first time.
November 3rd, it's coming!
And then it didn't come on November 3rd, and they were just like, ewww, okay, maybe no more dates in the future.
Yeah, just keep talking about next week, or a month, or watch the water, or whatever it is.
Let's just keep this really vague and silly.
Yeah, I mean, vagueness is like the False Prophet slash See Your Handbook, like 101, right?
I mean, like, Nostradamus wasn't like, yo, September 11, 2001, the World Trade Center towers are gonna fall.
Boom, believe it.
No, he was in there talking about like two brothers or whatever.
Who cares?
Yeah.
There was that big evangelical doomsday preacher and he kept foretelling the end times and it kept not happening.
I want to say his first big one was in the 80s and a bunch of his followers just like sold all their shit and he bought a bunch of billboards And it didn't happen, and it's just like, hey guys, if you're going to be running a death cult or doomsday cult, if you set doomsday within your lifetime, it's got to happen.
I like the idea of shoveling out money for billboards for the apocalypse.
Yeah!
Alright, let's get right with God, because it's really going to happen this time, and thank God these billboards are going to get everyone to take my message seriously.
Also, I mean, that is a good advertising strategy because if the apocalypse does happen, your billboards are just going to stay up forever.
Talk about that.
You can't stretch an advertiser dollar more than, you know, forever.
It's impossible.
There was a group of atheists who said they would watch your pets after you got raptured.
That was their business model.
It was, you are obviously going to get raptured on this date, so you need to pay us the sum of money now, and we will watch your pets while you are in Paradise and us non-believers are trapped on earth with your pets who don't get to get raptured because God only raptures humans because he's a speciesist.
So if anybody bought into that, do you think these atheists showed up at their doorstep on Rapture Day even though they knew they were going to be home?
How do you think the people in the house took that?
That would be very interesting.
I don't know if there was like that form of a payoff.
I don't know how much commerce was actually conducted for this incredibly important and beneficial service.
Can you imagine showing up after Hustle and somebody like that, and they're just like, how dare you take our money for this service?
You played us!
And it's like, no, you played yourself.
Yeah, exactly!
You just DJ'd Callum.
Oh, Harold Camping.
Harold Camping was who I was trying to think of, and he bought more than 5,000 billboards and 20 RVs they plastered his Judgment Day message on.
And it's like, it's happening.
I remember a big rapture day in the 90s when I was in high school.
Like, that was, like, a bunch of the students were all, like, jeeped up about it, and it was just hilarious.
It was just such a thing that was happening that week, and everyone was just like, nah, nothing's gonna happen.
But what if it does?
Wouldn't that be wild if, like, some of it just disappeared in the middle of class?
And, I mean, this is just the kind of stuff that— You could make a fucking average-ass show about it called The Leftovers.
It'll be incredible.
Oh God, The Leftovers, something that I was never going to get into.
And like the entire concept of it made me so incredibly angry that if Elle wanted to derail this podcast into just nothingness and oblivion that yeah, my hatred of The Leftovers concept is legion.
Yeah, it was really, it was just a strange thing.
And it's like that kind of stuff is what happens when you're a bunch of teenagers just dealing with stuff.
And I remember this one moment where the cool kid, this kid literally, I don't know how he got an electric guitar into the school and played it, but he did.
So he was just the awesomest dude in the world and this girl asked him about his belief systems and he was talking about how his mom was Jewish and his dad was Christian.
And he mixed everything together, and she was just like, oh god, she was just so enraptured by it.
And then for some odd reason, she turned to me, the slug, this blob of slime compared to this awesome Madonna that's next to her.
And she said, so Mike, what do you believe in?
And I'm like, I'm an atheist.
And she's like, what does that mean?
And I was like, I don't think there's a god or a heaven or a hell.
And her jaw just detached from her skull, and she looked at me and said, that is so wrong!
And I was like, well, that's, that's me.
That's, that's where I rate this world.
Oh, there's a final word on that.
Mike, Mike Raines, wrong about the afterlife.
Yep, wrong.
Judged and excommunicated.
Banished from the Garden of Eden.
Back to the impeachment.
So there's a lot of news reporting about this, obviously, because everybody likes taking their victory lap over Donald Trump.
But how important actually is this trial?
By all accounts, it seems like there is definitely no chance of getting convicted.
So what's the deal with the impeachment?
Uh, important.
I think it's like kind of a thing where you have to go on the record vis-a-vis a violent coup attempt upon the US government.
And if you are pro or con that.
I think that actually making Republicans like side with Trump and insurrection is a good political move.
How much of weight that will carry in two years for the midterms is always the issue because everyone always likes to talk about how the American voter has a short attention span and in like 17 months we could care about things that are-
Tell that to fucking Huma's laptop, am I right?
Oh, yeah.
If only the average American voter was as concerned about events from two years previous
as QAnon is concerned about Huma's laptop.
Oh God.
It could just be the most recent Delta.
You don't know.
Oh, I can't wait.
Cause we're going to have, during that election cycle, we're going to have like five year Deltas, maybe even six year Deltas.
It's going to be so great.
People trying to put two and two together for like, why this is the moment things are really going to hit the fan.
The other thing is that if Trump somehow miraculously did get convicted, he would not be allowed to run for president in 2024.
Which I would think Republicans would want.
I would think that if you were Howley or Cruz or any of these other lunatics who wanted to pick up the MAGA banner without having to actually confront Trump for it, that this would be like a no brainer political move to make.
But they apparently either think that Trump's being really old and out of shape and the whole man woman person camera TV senility thing.
They're all just kind of hoping that like some other DSX Mackinaw is going to get him out of the way.
They just want nature to take its course.
Yeah, they want nature to take its course.
That's not how it works.
Everyone was just waiting on whatever to knock him down.
Like the grab him by the pussy leak should have been the end of him.
And everyone was waiting like, oh, that's the end of him.
But it wasn't.
Well, I think in this instance, we're talking about nature.
We're talking more about like, you know, a coronary problem or like a fucking aneurysm or a stroke.
Heart attack, anything.
Slipping down a ramp because he can't navigate it properly because he's an Adonis.
Yeah, we know that's not going to happen because he's in the shape of a professional football player.
The same shape.
That's what his doctor said.
The doctor that immediately quit.
But no, I just... I think you might be able to give him credit for being in the shape of a long retired football player.
Body broken, brain addled.
Skin sagging and orange.
Sounds about right to me.
That is the one thing that I know- Donald Trump played for the, to play for Miami back in the
seventies.
And that's, that, that explains everything.
His obsession with Mar-a-Lago, all that shit.
I'm just worried America is going to get complacent again, and he really will,
like, get the Republican primary in 2024.
Which is, that would be, it would be, it would be such an incredible clown show
if that, if he just came back, even if he was able to like make some inroads
in the Republican primary, just dealing with this all over again.
And the best part about it would be that these guys, again, like Rubio and Howley and all these other schmucks who won't convict him, he'll just be like, look, you didn't think I committed any crimes.
You think I'm cool.
Like you're on the record thinking I'm awesome.
So get out of the fucking way.
Let me be president again.
Can you imagine if Ted Cruz managed to win the presidency of the United States?
really hoping he was gonna have a heart attack.
What the fuck?
Like, why does God like him more than me?
And it's like, well, God's cruel, idiot.
Like, you'd make your own future.
Like, have a pair of balls and convict him, you cowards.
But- Can you imagine if Ted Cruz managed to win
the presidency of the United States?
Pfft.
That would- That man is like a living paperweight
with a goatee sometimes.
Yeah.
He was, he came in second to Trump in 16.
I mean, by like the kind of the logic of a lot of these primaries,
he would be like the heir apparent.
I mean, that would be so, Oh Lord.
I mean.
The Cruz presidency.
I mean, Trump at least had like a base of like followers who thought he was like some sort of like weird God or whatever.
Is there actually anyone in America who likes Ted Cruz?
I mean, it seems like people vote for him to spite their enemies and then they're just sort of like, yeah, I voted for him.
I don't like him, but I fucking voted for him because I own the libs.
I mean, like, I just, I, it seems like the man's existence is entirely based around like spiting other people.
I don't know anything about Ted Cruz aside from the fact that he sucks when I've ever heard him talk.
The stuff he's saying sucks.
I don't know, maybe he's got a rabid fanbase of people that just like sucking.
I mean, the Confederate Army still has a rabid fanbase of people that like sucking.
The Hunger Games still has a rabid fanbase of people that like sucking.
Harry Potter still, okay, I'm gonna, the internet will come for me.
Al just getting spicier and spicier by the moment.
I remember Al Franken saying something to the effect of, I like Ted Cruz more than most senators like Ted Cruz and I hate Ted Cruz.
So like even his colleagues in the Senate like despise him.
And then he touched a woman without her consent.
That was Al Franken, right?
Yeah, that was Al Franken.
Good move, Al.
Oh, Al Franken!
You dumb moron.
You're in the political party where you actually get removed for doing stuff like that.
Yeah, I mean, the Republicans have made it clear.
If you're going to do that move, you have to record yourself bragging about it on tape.
Then you can be president.
Yes, exactly.
Moving on, in the cues in the news, we've got our buddy Jake Angeli making headlines again.
For those of you who don't know who Jake Angeli is, that is the real name of the person referred to as the Cubanon Shaman.
Mike, what's Q Shaman's deal?
Q Shaman right now is mad at Donald Trump.
He feels that Donald Trump hung him and the rioters on January 6th out to dry.
Does he have any opinions about Donald Trump's level of honor?
Donald Trump has no honor.
Donald Trump is an honorless, scurrilous human being.
My God.
It's almost as if, though, he said Donald Trump is, quote, not honorable.
So, I mean, of all the deep cuts upon Donald Trump, I think that is the one that cuts the deepest.
That this is a man sans honor, as it were.
Many of the people indicted for their acts on January 6th have stated that they feel that Trump encouraged them to do this and that they were doing what they did on Trump's behalf.
Of course, in the impeachment trial, Trump's lawyers have said, we didn't do nothing.
I don't know what those people are talking about.
They're out of their minds.
They're crazy.
They played the video.
Donald Trump literally was just exercising his first amendment right to scream that the election was stolen from him and that he needs people to stand up on his behalf and do the right thing and give him back the presidency that was stolen from him.
And if you gotta be a little rough and throw a few elbows, I don't know.
Go for it!
Get her done!
I've got a sweet quote here, courtesy of Newsweek.
This is by Q Shaman's attorney, Jacob Chansley, speaking on his client's behalf.
Quote.
Please be patient with me and other peaceful people who, like me, are having a very difficult time piecing together what all happened to us, around us, and by us.
I mean, again, I know I am frequently confused by how I manage to do a thing while I'm doing it.
Anyway, back to the quote.
Quote!
We are good people who care deeply about our country.
End quote.
Yeah, go fuck yourself, buddy.
Also, it's worth noting that aside from the fact that this guy's apology reads like capital H horseshit the whole way through, it's important for us to remember that he is a precious snowflake and probably a cuck.
And I only say this because I assume that that is the sort of thing he would say to a Muslim person who would like to wear a headscarf in a public space without being harassed, but it didn't stop him from complaining about the lack of organic food in his fucking prison.
So, you know, if religious freedom is the domain of Snowflake Cucks, then guess what, boy?
You cucked yourself.
It is.
Yeah, I mean, he is.
And the way you just said it is so strange.
I don't know.
I don't know how it all happened.
Things just got out of hand.
You know, when you're at the front door of the buildings of Congress and people are smashing on doors and throwing things at windows to break them, At some point, you can make the decision to be like, hey guys, uh, stop doing that.
And when they're like, fuck off, we're breaking in!
Then you can be like, okay, I'm leaving.
I'm getting out of here.
This is a bridge too far for me.
I know you can do that, because as a teen, I did that exact thing when a few friends of mine were just like, hey, we're going to break into this abandoned police station.
I said, no, thank you.
A hard pass on that, bro.
I was cool with hanging out around the abandoned police station, but I don't know, like, I would not like to break into that building, thank you very much.
Yeah, it's weird how L had free will at that period of his life, whereas the Q Shaman clearly did not and just, unbeknownst to him, ended up traipsing around the halls of Congress and then standing in the well of the Senate looking like a god trying to, like, To be fair, I didn't have Donald Trump's hypnotic, smooth brain massaging message playing in my ears.
It could have happened to any red-blooded patriot, Mike.
Anybody hearing Donald Trump's juicy words, how could they do anything other than want to blow up the Capitol or whatever?
How could they do anything other than premeditatedly bringing pipe bombs to put in front of both the DNC and RNC headquarters well ahead of Donald Trump saying any of that shit that day?
That's one of the things that makes me laugh so much is a lot of the QAnon people defending this stuff are just sort of like, hey there was premeditation so obviously Trump's speech didn't incite them when Trump was going on for months about how this election's being stolen from me, this shit is rigged, this is totally unfair, and then when someone like finally was able to, I would assume in a I know it's like a hand puppet show to explain to Trump that on January 6th, the vote was going to be certified by Congress.
And then Trump was like, Oh, on January 6th, they're going to certify the vote in Congress.
I should tell people to come to Washington DC on the 6th.
And then I will give a speech bitching and moaning about the elections being stolen from me.
I don't know, like a mile and a half away from where it's being stolen from me and see if the people listening to me will walk that mile and a half down to Congress.
I don't know, maybe kill a bunch of congress people and Mike Pence and keep me president because I would be in favor of that.
I mean, I've seen a lot of Trump supporters and assuming that they're going to walk a mile and I have to do anything seems like a big ask, so maybe he isn't.
And I say this as a big, fat, lazy dude.
Like, I can smell my own.
You know, a lot of those people are from the South and or the Midwest, so I'll leave connecting those dots up to you.
Yeah, this guy, this guy's pretty much just out here crying some crocodile tears because he doesn't want to get arrested for terrorism or whatever.
And, you know, I like I wish I could say that I look forward to hearing more from him, but I don't.
I kind of just wish that he would quietly get arrested for a billion years and then I would never have to hear more.
The only thing I would want to hear from him is, I would love for him to have like an honest reaction to QAnon's aggressive disavowing of him.
Just the fact that they were like, QShaman never heard of him.
He's obviously Antifa, he's obviously a Deep State undercover agent.
I would just want to see if him or any of these other people who have been so aggressively disowned by this movement would ever, like, put two and two together and realize that, like, there is no loyalty in this group.
Agent Shaman reporting for duty.
Right, exactly.
Have you listened to the Alex Jones interview with him?
Yep.
Oh yeah.
And he was like, back then, I mean, he was still pretty pro QAnon, pro Trump.
Like he was just trying to be a bro with Alex.
Like he, I really feel like he thought Alex wanted him on because now he was a celebrity and he was cool.
And Alex trying to get some of that Q Shaman rub off of him.
And then like a little while through the interview, Q Shaman kind of realized that Alex was trying to punk him and trying to make him out to be the bad guy of this whole thing.
And Q Shaman was just like, bro, why are you doing this to me?
We're on the same team.
Alex was just so angry and he didn't want this guy to be his friend.
And the same thing happened to Alex, like, a few weeks later when he brought a boogaloo boy on the show.
And that boogaloo boy, like, literally called Alex out on his shit and, like, called Alex controlled opposition, said that Alex is just a talker and the boog actually do things.
And it was really funny because after their interview was over, Alex challenged the guy to a bare-knuckle boxing match.
And then like five minutes later, Alex realized that was a really fucking bad idea because he's an out-of-shape 40-something piece of shit.
And the guy he was talking smack about was a 20-something boog who actually is in shape.
And then I was like, I was just joking about that bare-knuckle boxing match.
I don't want to do that.
Please don't punch me.
He was like, please don't beat the shit out of me in public.
I live for the day where Alex Jones challenges me to a bare-knuckle boxing match.
That would be incredible.
I like my chances.
It's like, I don't know where he records Info Wars, but is it an open combat state?
Because I will literally accept on air, and I'll just dive over the table and get it done.
Maybe Texas does allow that.
I mean, who knows?
I mean, there are a surprising number of states that still have open combat laws on the books.
It's fucking crazy.
I mean, it's 2021, but in some states you could literally just be like, hey, I want to fight you right now.
And that person could be like, I agree, we should fight right now.
And it's like, how many police are by?
You just get to fight in the middle of the street.
Bananas!
It's like that thing where there's like that still there's a law in the books in Massachusetts where you can duel on Boston Common if the mayor's present and like they just never got rid of that so that's a thing you can do in Boston.
That's right Alex Jones I've called you out we're gonna we're gonna fly to Boston and we're gonna meet up on Boston Common we're gonna get the mayor involved and we're gonna duel to the death!
It's me and you two minute or one man leaves That would be the greatest television event in the history of the world, actually.
Because Alex Jones would never show up in a million years for anything that was remotely dangerous.
Because he, at his heart, is a coward and a grifter who just wants to make money off this shit.
It's really funny, because he was at DC during the storming of the Capitol, and he knew immediately, he was like, oh no, oh no!
The smog on South.
My idiot fans are actually doing what I've told them to do, and that hurts my bottom line.
And the best part about it was InfoWars themselves were like, yeah, we're taking over the Capitol!
We're fucking people up!
This is great!
Woo!
And when they get Alex on the horn, Alex is like, no, this is Antifa.
Antifa is totally doing this.
This is not us.
Because he's the only one who gets how this is actually a bad thing.
All of his idiot fucking employees.
I am not Larry Braverman, I repeat.
Yeah, I repeat.
Yeah, he's just such an obvious con man.
This is the funniest thing about QAnon and Alex and all these other right-wing grifting dirtbags.
The first thing they said to everybody was that if Joe Biden gets in, there's going to be blood in the streets from all the children being slaughtered in Satan's name.
And there will probably be anti-fight death squads coming to kill us all.
The Antichrist will rise up.
You're all fucked.
The world's gonna end.
This is the end times.
We're dead.
Then Biden gets into office and all of these grifting dirtbags pivot and they're like, well, maybe it's not that bad.
I mean, I don't know about all that, but Biden got sworn into office and then The Weeknd performed the Super Bowl halftime show and he brought Satan with him.
This is important.
This is true.
I mean, maybe Alex Jones and all of us are wrong, because for Super Bowl halftime shows, we were finally getting back to the hardcore Satanism that has been what the Super Bowl halftime show has been all about for decades.
It's so hard to follow the Satanism of Shakira.
A fallen angel descending upon a choir of red-eyed devil-like people.
Satan showed up, boy, and it got turnt.
Oh, yeah, I mean, that was, uh, and then the, um, the, the choir like parted and I saw one
Illuminati hunter, uh, declaring that when that, when the, uh, the choir parted and there
was that, that hallway of light, the weekend came through, they were like, and this is
the birth of Satan.
As the weekend trudged out, apparently now sanctified.
And he was, of course, wearing a red sparkly jacket and black clothes besides that, which is the wardrobe of Satan.
And And then we had the backup dancers who were all wearing their satanic outfits with their weird jockstrap masks, which again, mask indoctrination, all that important stuff of the New World Order and the Illuminati.
The maze, there was all kinds of people talking about how the fact that the maze is symbolic of humanity being lost, deceived, tricked, led astray, confused.
That three-second meme that everyone's busting out, that was that part.
Also, the weekend not wearing a mask and everyone else wearing a mask was the divide between the elites, who don't play by the rules, and us, the shackled masses, enslaved by our masks.
I'm sure it had nothing to do with the fact that he was sprinting around the football field and stands, singing and dancing and also running around like a crazy person to make his scene transitions on time.
At one point he went from up high on that set they built to down low so fast that they must have had some sort of fireman pole or something installed in it.
Well, there's all that talk that he spent like $7 million on that performance, in which case, I think I could have done it for like, I don't know, one and a half, maybe two.
So, unless fireworks cost tens of millions of dollars, in which case, maybe.
Well, I mean, you'd have to pay all those, you'd have to pay that choir and all the dancers and stuff, not just for the performance time, but also for the rehearsal time.
Didn't the Weeknd pay for a bunch of it himself?
Yeah, that's what he just said.
$7 million.
Well yeah, I mean, you gotta spend money to make money on the weekend.
It's hot as fuck right now.
He's got that ha-ha heat!
But what was really funny was, like last year, Shakira and JLo, most of these people were just complaining about it being way too sexy, because they're a bunch of prudes who believe that all sex should be missionary with the lights off.
Because they're all Shapiros.
Yes, yes, they're all Shapiros.
And what was really awesome was the Lady Gaga halftime show.
They had nothing for them, and they made them so mad.
So now they're happy that they finally got a halftime show where they can actually do their 45 minute YouTube clips where they get three ad breaks from one of those Asian talking about how all the Illuminati symbolism and occult rhetoric of the weekend and how evil and demonic it is and get that fear porn going strong for their audience.
We just need to get the Church of Satan to sponsor our podcast.
Can you imagine if our ad breaks were for the Church of Satan?
That would be great.
I mean, I can throw a rock and hit Salem.
I could go down to the tiny house that is the Satanic Temple.
I believe that's the name of the Church of Satan in our neck of the woods.
And I could try to talk to those guys like, Hey, can we do ad breaks?
We'll buy the... They have a Church of Satan membership cards you can get for like 20 bucks.
I could absolutely do that kind of thing.
Do a cross-branding promotion between them and the podcast.
Can you imagine how popular we might beget to the opposition?
Did I just say might beget?
Wow.
Yes.
Okay, let me try that one again.
Can you imagine how popular we might get with the opposition if our podcast became sponsored by Satan?
Actually, my favorite thing about all of this stuff is that Anton LaVey and the West Coast Church of Satan and the Satanic Temple These groups are basically like atheists slash libertarians who just use the First Amendment and quote-unquote Satanism as a thumb to the eye of Christians who try to overstep what the Constitution says you can do.
When they like try to put like a public display of Christianity somewhere that like this public property they're like okay great we'll put a statue to Baphomet up there next to it and the First Amendment says we have a right to do that so tough shit.
And if you read the tenets of these two churches, it's just basically live and let live.
It's a bunch of boring secular humanism.
The whole, we worship the bad guy in the Bible thing is not something a lot of people do.
There's probably not a lot of actual bad guy in the Bible Satanists in America or the world.
That is an incredible niche.
Yeah, it's like Richard Ramirez and... I can't think of any others.
Well, hey man, reach out to Satan and see if they've got... I mean, they're a church, right?
So that means that they get all those tax breaks and shit.
And I'm sure they've got a gift shop.
So go ahead and see if they've got that money tricklin' and if they'd like to have us spread the good word about Satan.
You know?
After a long, hard day of contemplating the misery of our country, I like to rest my head in the warm bosom of Satan.
Yes, that's right.
Lucifer the Morning Star, the devil himself, Satan.
Satan.
I actually think that the Salem Satanic Temple, I think they actually went out of their way to not be tax exempt.
They didn't want to be hypocrites.
So, that'd be interesting.
That's not good, because that means that they will have less money with which to buy ad space for... Mom's Lady Passion Satan!
The same Satan recipe you recognized from when you were a kid.
That also reminded me of the crazy saga of David Hogg making an anti-MyPillow pillow company.
The Parkland Shooting Survivor Kid is all over Twitter, having created a new pillow company called GoodPillow.
They're going to go at MyPillow and try to fuck them up and take the pillow market away from the guy that supported the insurrection.
And all I can think of is that because MyPillow was just so synonymous with podcast advertisement, that I'm like, Hey, David Hogg, hit us up.
You're not even going to have a product for like a fucking year, but we will shill for your impending product for a year, sight unseen, and then when it comes out and it's a total dumpster fire, we'll still have a year of ad money from you and we will appreciate it very much.
Folks, when your knees are worn out from praying to Baphomet, this is just good pillow.
Softest pillow you can kneel on.
Think about how incredible El's ad reads are.
Think about how smart that is.
Folks, I'm here to tell you how I just built my new satanic website with Squarespace.
You're throwing away money not advertising via El and his golden vocal cords.
You're leaving honey.
You're leaving money on the table.
Absolutely, absolutely.
Are you clumsy in the kitchen?
You know what looks good on Satan's red skin is blue apron, folks.
Blue apron is going to make me a punishment.
I enjoy that our podcast has become so meta that it's not even about anything anymore.
We're now the Seinfeld of podcasts.
Yeah, that's right.
Truly, we are a podcast about nothing.
Okay, so it sounds like we covered all of the newsworthy bits for this week because it turns out that the white hot heat of QAnon news headlines is sort of abated slightly, which means for the first time in many weeks, we are going to get back to investigating the mystery of Q's Eponymous Q-drops from back in the day, but now it's like an autopsy because we're digging around in his guts, but not in like the sexy way, the autopsy way.
Yes.
Yeah, that's right.
We're getting it.
We're getting up in Q's guts once again, starting with, I believe we were on the Q-drop, a nice round number, Q-drop 5-0, number 50.
So let's hear from the voice of Q. Big drop.
How did NK obtain uranium?
How did Iran obtain uranium?
Why did BO send billions in cash and wire to Iran?
Why the cash component?
Was the hostage component a cover?
For what?
Could any of the cash component be handed off to other people?
How many planes carried the cash into Iran?
Did all land in Iran?
Did all land in the same location?
Why is this relevant?
Who controls NK?
Who really controls NK?
Think of a single person.
Think of a powerful entity.
Why is this important?
Why are wars so important?
Who benefits?
What does hostage refer to?
Who can be held hostage and controlled by NK having miniaturized nuclear weapons?
Where is BO today?
Where is VJ?
Alice and Wonderland.
My god, it was a little bit meatier than I expected.
What I love is that there were four planes that brought the money to Iran, and why is this relevant?
You tell me, idiot!
Why does those four planes matter to you?
It's just this sort of weird, detail-orientated bullshit where you make people, like, chase their own tails trying to figure out, like, there were four planes, oh my god, what does four mean?
Start decoding, gotta figure it out.
Four equals D, what does D mean?
I mean, it's just that kind of- That's just because you're not familiar with the old four-plane Monty.
Very common.
If you want to obscure where some money is going, Four Plane Monte is the way to do it.
It is absolutely all about the Four Plane Monte.
Is this Trump saying that Barack Obama took a big cash payout to give North Korea and Iran uranium?
Yes, pretty much.
This is whining about the Iran nuclear deal, which was a big thing that everyone was mad about, and Trump on the campaign trail was going to get us out of it, and he did.
And now Biden's trying to get us back into the Iran deal because we don't want Iran to have nuclear weapons.
They were agreeing to the terms of the deal until Trump got rid of it, at which point Iran was like, you know what?
Maybe we'll make a fucking nuke now.
How do you like them apples, idiot?
That's what I would do if I ran the country.
See what I did there?
I ran.
Me?
I told you, Sarge.
Making groan-inducing humor like that is my job.
Me!
So, they love the visual of the giant pallets of cash that we, like, brought to Iran.
And they don't want to acknowledge the fact that that was part of the deal because, like, back in the 70s when the Shah of Iran got overthrown by the Ayatollah and all that kind of stuff, Basically, Iran had bought a bunch of shit from us.
And we took the money, then we didn't give them the shit they paid for.
And we held that money in escrow for like, like decades.
And part of the negotiation was Iran was like, hey, we want that money back.
Like you gotta give us that money back.
Are you talking about the Iran-Contra crisis?
I don't think this was Iran-Contra.
I think this was actual because that was that was under the table kind of money being Shipped around here and there.
This was an actual like above-board agreement that we made of Iran and then we fucked them over and Like there were there were people that like basically there were people that offered Iran like much Arbiters that were like you owe these guys like way more money than this but we got Iran to take a bite on the lower figure of money and And for whatever other parameters in the negotiations.
So really, like that pile of cash was like a sweet deal that we got because I remember like one arbiter said something to the effect of like $3.3 billion is what we owed Iran, which was like, what the fuck?
So, um, this was all just negotiation and all that kind of stuff, but again, anything a Democrat does is bad and evil.
And at the end there, where he brings up VJ, uh... Yeah, who the hell is B.O.
and VJ?
B.O.
is Barack Obama and V.J.
is Valerie Jarrett and that is again some more of that like kind of bullshit of QAnon where Obama was a moron and a dupe which isn't racist at all and that was basically that Valerie Jarrett was like his CIA handler who was like controlling him inside the White House.
Whenever he would stray too far off the reservation she'd like pull on his leash.
Yeah, you gotta do the right thing, Barack.
Remember what we did to Kennedy?
Calm it down, dial it back a little.
Let's stay on the beam and do what the Satan-worshiping monsters want you to do.
Who's the powerful entity referenced here that controls North Korea or whatever?
Is it the House of Mouse?
Yes, it should be.
I would love for it to be Disney.
Why are wars so important?
You mean Star Wars?
Oh shit, it's a lot thicker.
Boom, you got it!
The Mandalorian is part of this.
Oh, I always knew we'd bring down Pablo Pascal.
But yeah, this is one of the things where Q was talking about how North Korea isn't actually run by Kim's family.
It was actually run by the CIA as a way to terrorize the world by having a rogue state that had nuclear powers and capabilities.
Even though the main country that North Korea fucks with is us.
So it's really weird that, like, the CIA is running a country to fuck with America when they're America.
But then Q, because this was back when Q actually did things, patriots, like, murdered the CIA leaders that were pulling the strings on Kim, and they liberated him.
And that's why Kim was able to cut the historic peace deal with Trump.
And get rid of all those nuclear weapons and make the world a better place.
Oh wait, none of that happened.
I'm just lying.
But that was the story that Q liked to tell.
That this is what's really going on behind the scenes of North Korea.
Which is really weird because North Korea has only been around since the 1950s.
This isn't some ancient nation like Mongolia or something where its history is shrouded in The ancients, and one could never truly know what was going on in 1300 BC and shit.
No, this is like, yeah, this country, it's been around for 70 years, and here are the three guys that have run it.
So this isn't really tricky to figure out exactly what happened in North Korea.
It's like the Mormonism of governments.
It is easily scrutable.
Because it's happened so recently, one might even call it wildly scrutable.
Kim Jong-un found gold plates that divine the words of God.
It's really, it's all of that.
Kim Jong-un seems like he found gold plates and then he ate all the food that was on them.
Waka waka!
Boom!
Take that!
Get it?
Cause he's doughy while all of his people starve?
It's funny.
Boom!
I would call it gallows humor, but it's more like swallows humor.
Folks!
This is where if we had the soundboard, we'd just be banging the rim shot like all day, just like five minutes of rim shot drops.
You want to move on to the next tiny drop?
Oh, much as I'm all about weak nuts, I'm also all about tiny drops.
We hear you.
We hear all Americans such as yourself.
The time has come to take back our great land.
The time is now.
Rest assured, POTUS is backed by the absolute finest people alive, who are all dedicated to the eradication of evil and corruption from the U.S.
world.
Find peace.
God is with us.
God bless and be safe.
The WH.
Okay, I should clarify that this particular drop is Q responding in quote form to some big weepy post that some idiot on one of these chambords posted about, like, I've been like, all this propaganda, and I'm a patriot, and, you know, the idea that Satan has run our country makes me want to kill myself, so I'm thinking about joining the Navy so that I can be a good soldier, and yadda yadda yadda, and all that weird shit.
And also, it's got a big picture, the quote itself has a big picture, that says, one nation, under God, and it's the continent of, well, the country of America, with an American flag.
Yeah, the continent of the United States.
I mean, let's be real.
Canada's our hat and Mexico's our boots.
Yeah.
And my favorite part about it is that the picture is OneNationUndergodT-ShirtDesign.png.
So whoever decided to quote this one, they didn't even decide to rename the file.
They were just like, I found it!
Boom!
I nailed it!
The second thing that's interesting about this is, has Q signed off as from the White House before?
Is that a thing?
Oh, I don't believe, and I don't know that it's ever happened again.
I mean, this is, uh... I mean, this is allegedly a verified Q post, right?
Like, tripcode style and all that shit, so like, what's the deal with Q suddenly claiming to be from the White House?
Unless the WH could possibly stand for anything else.
This is still in the 4chan days, so it's very...
It's very verified, and it's original Q. What happened was, one of the other great QAnon researchers, the QAnon Origins Project, basically around QDrop 34, People started finding, like, the old shit Q said, and, uh, he started, like, verifying his old, uh, claims, and that's how they started creating the canonical, uh, Q drops that we now know and love today.
So, whenever he would make more and more stuff, people would, like, make graphics updating what the Q drops currently contain, and he would be like, yes, this is accurate.
You are doing a good job, my, uh, follower.
And, um, So, this is absolutely a real Q-drop, and from what I know, this is the only time he's ever been like, yeah, I'm in the White House, I'm part of White House staff, and we're listening to you, we hear you, and we're going to work for you.
Have any of these other more successful like QAnon you know sort of forensic scientists or whatever like have they ever figured out why in this one post Q suddenly is claiming to be from the White House?
I've actually never heard this.
This is, uh, I'm going to have to run this up the flagpole to people because this is like one of those things where like you just have seen these drops so many times your eyes kind of dull over and you don't notice things.
But this is very strange that he literally is telling you, Oh yeah, by the way, I'm, uh, I'm making this cue drop from a computer inside the White House.
Like I am literally the right hand of Donald Trump.
Donald Trump will be on 4chan.
You should take a look into that.
You should look into the sinister meaning behind Q claiming to be from the White House, and also what cryptic message could be found within OneNationUndergodT-shirt underscore design dot png.
We can't skip over, rest assured, POTUS is backed by the absolute finest people alive, and now here in the future, that's age like milk.
I mean, so maybe more than anything, this post might be Donald Trump as Q, more than anything else.
First of all, he's preemptively saying, or not preemptively, he's signing it from the White House.
But also, if you just read it in Donald Trump's voice, it's just like, Red Shirt, POTUS is backed by the absolute finest people alive.
We're all dedicated to the eradication of evil corruption.
The finest people.
We've got the best people working on it with the most people and the best and the greatest people.
And then someone whispers in Trump's ear to really lay the God stuff on thick.
So he's like, oh yeah, God is with us.
God bless and be safe.
Oh yeah, by the way, I'm totally Donald Trump.
I'm totally from the White House.
The WH.
Yep, nailed it.
Boom.
I'm so good at this Q stuff.
I mean, at this point, at this point, this is still like LARP stuff, right?
So this person is probably intentionally like trying to let a little information like leak out where it's just like, oh, my Q level clearance plus being in the White House.
What does it mean?
Because they want people to be invested Tom Clancy style.
It's still the first couple of days and Q's on 4chan for three months before he jumps to 8chan.
Yeah, and then claims that 4chan was compromised and not cool and he couldn't stay there.
So the first three months, which I don't know how many Qdrops that comprises, is very much like just the actual LARP, LARPiest LARP.
Yeah, it's the Wild West.
And I mean, and there were people like trying to like hone in on the action.
And there are also again, the QAnon Origins Project, they're looking for like, More Q drops on October 30th.
They figured that we're actually from Q because you can still go through the 4chan archives and look through all that stuff and Given what Q's posting schedule was like back then, he probably was saying more shit.
And there's also, like, some times where, like, there'll be a session or something, and it looks like the person that was being Q was, like, not in character, as it were, sometimes.
But I'll have to, like, dig around on that some more and make sure that I'm not, like, speaking out of turn.
I'm sure that that Vice documentary totally found out who Q was while also totally missing the point the whole time.
They were so busy looking for Q that they found him and missed all of the other points.
So good work, Vice, and all of your skills, I guess.
Whatever.
I can wear some horn-rimmed glasses if you guys are looking for a new Q pundit.
Holler at your boy.
Oh, God.
That's all I want in my life, is to be an officially accredited QAnon researcher via Vice, as it were.
We've never filmed a documentary, have no video experience, but you can hire us, us three.
We will make a better QAnon documentary.
Just give us the money that you gave those idiots.
Yeah, I mean, how long would it take for us to record for one of us to look into the camera and say, it was some rando, and then it was the Watkinses.
OK, cool.
We cracked that nut, boys.
And while we're at it, also, the guy in Inception is in a dream the whole time.
And also, magic does exist in Pan's Labyrinth.
You can find out all this information by just observing the material.
Or like, what's the deal with Thomas Edison?
Like he wasn't a genius.
He just went through all the old patents and saw what didn't work.
So he's like, here's the 900 things that people already tried.
We don't have to do those.
So he just did a little research and it's just like, hmm, there's all these people that have done the research and are like, who could Q be?
Oh, it's those two idiots.
It's those guys there.
Like, and they just didn't do that.
The thing that's so funny to me is Dominion, Dominion or Smartmatic, it was one of the two providers of Voting machines that are currently suing everybody for billions of dollars being defamed.
Boy are they.
One of the cease and desist orders they put out actually had on it Ron and Jim Watkins as like people that they are targeting to shut up about them or they're bringing the hammer down on them.
So, uh, Icarus is flying a little too close to the sun here when your dumb image board, uh, full of Nazis and lolliporn is now being listed alongside, uh, MyPillowGuy, Sidney Powell, Lin Wood, Fox News, Newsmax.
Congratulations, guys, you made it to the big boy table.
And by big boy table, I mean billion dollar lawsuit.
So I think that's one of the reasons why, beyond just the fact that Jim really thought QAnon would go away after Trump lost, because Jim doesn't have vision or foresight of how cults work and how these kinds of movements don't die ever.
The Wagyu hat blocks that vision.
Yes.
So Jim's still down in South America.
Where's Ron?
I think Ron's in Japan.
I think Jim's in actual America.
I think Jim's here in the U.S.
right now.
Um, because he applied for citizenship in the Philippines and one thing led to another and he didn't get it.
So I think Jim's in the U.S.
and Ron's not, but I, I'm not totally a thousand percent sure on any of that.
But, uh, again, when you're wearing your, uh, proud of your Japanese heritage, American cowboy hat, things get confusing for where you're currently located.
All right, let's roll into this next meaty drop.
Give it to me.
The next, the meatiest of drops, Q drop 52.
Review BO's financial disclosure when we submitted pre-election campaign.
What is the annual salary of a sitting U.S.
president?
What homes were just purchased by BO?
How much did it cost?
How does it reconcile?
What is the net worth of Pelosi?
How does it reconcile?
What is the John M Institute?
Notice any patterns relating to the CF?
Where did John M obtain his surgery?
Why is this relevant?
What surgery did he supposedly have?
How many days until he was sitting back in Congress and sitting on the OS column?
What is John M's net worth?
How does it reconcile?
What is MW's net worth?
How does it reconcile?
You can play this game with most D's and many R's.
What does Swamp refer to?
What does money buy?
Alice and Wonderland.
I hate Riddler Q so much.
I mean, again, that's a lot of words for whoever wrote this to waste on just being like, hey man, I don't understand how people make money.
Like, well, the president only makes like $100,000 a year, so how did Barack Obama buy all those houses?
And it's just like, well, he was probably pretty well off before he was the president.
And also, as the president, he gets to be incredibly more well off, because he gets to be paid for other shit, like speaking fees or whatever.
Yeah, like the moment Obama got out of the White House, he had like a trillion dollar book deal because everyone wanted the Obama memoir.
Yeah, sorry, not while he's in the White House, but I mean it's like pretty easy to see how these politicians manage to make supplementary income, including but not limited to just like checking their tax returns, which Democrats are not the ones who are afraid to turn over.
Right.
And the other thing that's really funny about this is that Obama was a millionaire going into the White House, but he had his two books, The Audacity of Now and Dreams of My Father.
I may have got that first book title wrong, but he had... The Audacity of Hope.
Yeah, those books like kind of like put him on the map as being someone that was like a mover and shaker in democratic politics.
And then he was a senator for a cup of coffee before he became president.
So he was like independently wealthy before he got into office.
And John McCain came from a family of admirals.
Admirals, I mean, that was kind of like a big, like, failure point for him, is that he kind of washed out of the Navy, and he didn't get it, or the Air Force, whichever branch of the military he was in.
But he kind of, he didn't make it.
He wasn't like the four-star leader that he was supposed to be, but he still had a prestigious family bloodline.
And then he married a rich lady!
That's how he got his money!
So, I mean, like, these things are, like, known that, like, how these people got where they were.
Yeah, Mike, but how does it reconcile?
It reconciles that a powerful guy marries a rich lady so he can be powerful and rich.
Riddler Q, I mean, at least with the previous Riddler Q drop where he was talking about the four planes and that they all land in the right place, at least that shit was like, bullshitty enough where you might not understand it, or you could do research as though, where did those planes land?
This is just like, how did these people get their money?
And it's like, book deals and marriage, idiot.
There's nothing to it.
It's so pathetic.
The oldie fashioned- Wait, I'm gonna drop another nothing burger on us, Q. Yeah, thanks.
Thanks for absolutely nothing.
Qdrop52 sucks, just like DC's The New 52.
Thank you.
Boom!
Take that, DC Comics!
Nice, timely roast!
I mean, it's not timely, because I think that New 52 shit is over, because the New 52 sucked.
Yeah, it was years ago.
That's what I'm saying.
TurboTeen!
Anyway, let's move on to that next sweet, sweet, buttery drop.
List out all who have foundations.
Why is this relevant?
So this is a vague reference to a military coup being needed to purge America and the world of corruption.
politically motivated? The level of corruption in our country, and most others, is so severe
there is only one way. Alice and Wonderland.
So this is a vague reference to a military coup being needed to purge America and the
world of corruption. I don't know how you can have a world army and not be a quote unquote
The IRS, all the branches of the military, the FBI, the CIA, they're all corrupt.
than anything on earth. But hey, if the global army is killing my enemies, they're good, I guess.
Never forget that Trump has all the power, but every single institution in America is corrupt.
The IRS, all the branches of the military, the FBI, the CIA, they're all corrupt.
But Donald Trump has all the power, but everyone around him is corrupt.
Yeah, you would think if Trump knew what he was doing, he could, like, I don't know,
pull some strings and fix our government and make it actually work, which apparently he cannot.
No, he's very bad at that.
He's very bad at his job.
I mean, he couldn't even make a wall happen, so.
We have two more little baby drops to get through today, and that'll put us at 55, which is where we wanted to start.
And QDOT 55 is the mother load, as it were.
So here's the second-to-last one of this segment that leads to the big payoff in the end.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord.
Plans to prosper you and not to harm you.
Plans to give you hope and a future.
Just leaning into that Christian bullshit because... Being right with you is being right with Jesus.
Yes.
And this is what makes me laugh so much about this kind of stuff is there's no law enforcement in the world that would, like, talk about Satanism and Christianity this way.
I mean...
You kind of have to go where the witnesses take you and where the evidence leads you.
And what if you found a bunch of non-Christian witnesses who are willing to out the deep state?
Nope, impossible.
If you're not like a hardcore read-a-couple-passages-before-you-go-to-bed Christian at the end of the night, you're probably a deep state baby-eating monster.
So I wonder how much well this played with like the Chan boards because They're a bunch of nihilist, edgelord, neo-Nazis.
Were they all sort of like, yeah, he's going hardcore Christian, this is great!
Or were they like, oh yeah, he's saying this shit so that when we talk to the blue-pilled normies about this crap, we can like, hit him with the Jesus and make him think it's okay.
It's also worth noting that we're bouncing back and forth pretty wildly between Riddler Q and Penguin Q here.
Riddler Q obviously being the one that drops all the rhetorical questions, and then Penguin Q being our blanket term for anyone who's pretty much not writing in that style, as in posting Bible quotes or Just posting some other single quote with no rhetorical questions, or in the later drops, uh, just writing, you know, technically coherent paragraph structures about nonsense, which is really fun to read because it just sounds like the ramblings of an actual crazy person.
Anyway, so, uh, so is it time for the money shot of Key Draw Number 55?
Yay!
Hit us with it, daddy!
Look to Twitter.
Exactly this.
My fellow Americans, the storm is upon us.
God bless.
Yeah.
So three and a half years ago, Donald Trump was going to tweet this tweet out
and the storm was going to be upon us and everyone, all our bad guys were going to die.
Yeah.
And the best part about this is now, this actually can't happen, because Twitter just came out and said that Trump's banned his lifetime.
If he runs for public office again, they will not give him his account back.
He can fuck all the way off.
Get your longboards out, folks.
The storm wave is upon us.
November 2nd, 2017.
The storm happened.
I remember.
Where were you when the storm happened?
I think my running joke is I was in an Arby's when America was made great again.
When I was not in an Arby's.
But I mean, that's where you should be.
You want to be in Arby's, because where else could you possibly go to really feel the soul of America via a cheaply made processed meat?
Yeah.
I mean, if Donald Trump really wanted to help America, he could have made Arby's great again.
I mean, come on.
What the hell's wrong with you, Trump?
But this is the thing is that this was so urgent and so eminent and so impending three and a half years ago.
And yet these people are still recycling this crap.
That Friday, Saturday thing that predates this drop.
They're digging up stuff that's ancient and screaming and yelling about how it's still relevant today.
It's like looking for the rapture in the Bible.
It's like trying to decode when the date is and all that kind of stuff.
Only now we're watching Nostradamus and these other hucksters doing it in real time.
I mean Q's message is timeless.
You just gotta wait for time to match up to Q's wisdom.
I've actually had people talk about that where they say that Q's message, like the early drops are actually the end of the story and we are working backwards to it.
Oh, so Q is Christopher Nolan and this is Memento?
Yes.
That explains why QAnon is so popular for no reason.
So, I've actually had people, and then there are other people who've said that Q-drops are not in chronological order.
That this is all just Q's gazing of the time stream, and he's just like throwing things out there.
Oh, so Q's Dr. Manhattan.
Yes.
Fuck you and fuck them.
Yeah, Q, he's just so highly evolved that his stuff will make sense only when it means to make sense.
You know what I mean, bud?
Yep.
Wowie zowie.
That's where they go with it.
That's how they try to justify it.
It's so great.
Well, okay.
Well, fuck Q and his drops and the whores he rode in on.
Let's talk about our swollen mailbag!
Woo!
Yes, our incredibly swollen mailbag.
This week, both of our Grand Inquisitors are coming at us hard.
Trenton Walkman throws the first punch by asking, how do you like your coffee?
Light and sweet, because I'm extra basic.
Black, because I'm lactose intolerant.
Or if you're ordering iced coffee from Dunkin' Donuts and you happen to be in the Boston area, you just call that Lodge Ice Regula.
Let me get a Lodge Ice Regula.
Yeah.
And I don't drink coffee, so that's how I take it.
I mean, that's how you're going to win your seventh Super Bowl ring.
No caffeine, no strawberries.
Keep it tight.
Yes.
And a decimated offensive line on the other team.
Boom.
Take that, you absolutely terrible Kansas City offensive line.
Roasted.
The A.I.S.
Millard, our other Grand Inquisitor, asks, what will hardcore QAnon people be doing politically and personally a year from now?
What about the moderate followers who are more likely to lose hope And how much will recruiting disaffected QAnon followers bolster the violent neo-Nazis and other white supremacist groups?
Politically, railing against pedophilia.
Privately, engaging in pedophilia.
I mean...
Uh, I really wonder, like, how, like, the Grifter class will try to, like, sort of disassociate from Q and try to make it more just right-wing.
Standard bullshit.
Well, like, because like they, these people like Praying Medic and Jordan Sather and all these guys, they want to try and hit that sweet spot where they have some faith healer, crunchy, hippie, dippiness in them.
And they also are basically trying to be like Ben Shapiro, Posabeck, Sternovich, and the other dirtbag, right-wing grifters that are like on that level of trying to make money off this stuff.
I think that the main goal is to try to be like, hey man, Q is a vibe and a belief and that kind of stuff.
They just want to go down that road and not so much down the road of talking about the fact that Q was literally what caused the Capitol riots.
That idea of violent reclaiming of the government because we need the military to stamp out our enemies and exterminate all the libs.
That's a little too spicy to get yourself on OAN and Newsmax and definitely Fox News.
The Q is where the heart is.
Unfortunately, that heart is in the antebellum south.
So... Yes.
Right now, because QAnon is on Gab and on Telegram, the people who are monitoring groups like Oath Keepers and neo-Nazi groups and all that kind of stuff, they're seeing those channels are talking about like, hey, you need to go into the QAnon channels and talk to them.
If you find people that seem receptive like tell them to come on over to our channel and talk about this stuff and just like break bread with them.
So there is like a pipeline from QAnon to like violent right-wing extremism.
How powerful that pipeline will be is interesting because I think it really kind of comes down to the losing hope thing.
Because QAnon is just all about the bread and circuses in the sense that they're constantly trying to keep you happy and placated and thinking that something's going to happen and we're going to get a payoff.
I saw one guy who was like, uh, the whole point of what's happening right now wasn't so much that Biden got into office.
It was to trigger a violent counter response by us so that then they could crack down on us.
And it's like, well, I think getting Biden into office was like part one.
And like you guys feeling stupid was just the cherry on top of the sundae.
Yeah.
So like step one was having the guy that was going to execute all of the bad guys for treason no longer be capable of doing that.
So now the bad guys get to live without.
The threat of imminent arrest and execution at Gitmo.
Part two was to make us sad about it.
It's like, no, that is part two.
It's not part one.
Part one was not you being sad.
So like the mythos of this thing was built.
We have the story.
We know what the story was.
You can't lie about the story now, although you're trying to, because you want to keep your audience hopeful, but not violent.
Like that's the needling out of thread.
Where people are willing to buy into your bullshit, but not buy into it so much that they grab a gun and try to save the world.
I both love and hate the idea of some neo-Nazi on Telegram infiltrating a Flat Earth group in order to preach QAnon.
It's just like, oh boy.
I mean, maybe it'll be easier and maybe it'll be easier on the world at large to keep track of all these people if they just like coalesce all of their dumb stuff into one, you know, like uber conspiracy.
It's all one thing.
And fuck it, they could just keep calling it QAnon.
QAnon will just absorb all of these other dumb culty things and then we will never be out of a job because we'll always have some dumb horseshit to talk about.
I can't believe that a lot of Q people still think the Earth is flat.
What a bunch of dumb-dumbs!
Oh yeah, when we shift into hard, anti-flat Earths, that's when this podcast is really gonna pop off.
Or in a year after the vaccines have rolled out and it's just like, did you hear a bunch of more Q supporters died because they refused to take the vaccine?
Ha ha!
What a bunch of clowns!
Those clowns in QAnon sure did it again!
What a bunch of clowns!
Potion Seller asks, what do you think QAnon influencers will do going forward?
Is it likely that one or more of them will try to become a Q-like figure?
Well, we kind of covered this in the previous question.
Yeah, that's right.
It's Lin Wood.
He's ascended to the position of chief Q mouthpiece, right?
Yeah, Lin Wood is basically acting as Trump and Q. He's kind of like the character that combines Luke Skywalker and Han Solo into one.
He is the Qualfa and the Quomega.
So like, Lin Wood's going for it, but he wasn't like an old school grifter.
iTheSpy, that LARPing bastard that most of QAnon hates.
i has always worked that angle where he is like Q adjacent and is like basically working in the office down the hall from Q. So like, there's always going to be someone who's going to be trying to be like, Hey, I'm the insider with the Intel.
You need to save the world.
But, uh, whether or not I will ever get traction with that crap because Q left and failed, uh, who knows?
But, um...
Yeah, that is... Mr. Buckwild also... Everyone wants to go on this thing and he says, what do you think Jordan Sather will transfer to to scam people?
He'll just go back to the health shit.
He'll just sell his $30 coffee.
He's gonna be the next Mistress Cleo.
Yes, absolutely.
All of... I mean, these people are like... I'm trying so hard not to say call me now right there.
Yeah, I mean like this is some of these people just are grifters like born and bred at this point and this is what they're going to do for forever.
They're never going to shy away from it.
Yeah, I mean, even if all of the QAnon avenues dried up, they just go to sell, like, some fucking horseshit vitamin supplement or whatever, right?
Yes.
Oh, someone had a vitamin supplement thing, and I saw the ad copy for it, and I just looked at it, and I'm like, well, this is Jordan Sather or Dustin Nemos, 100%.
And then I read the ad pitch at the bottom, and it was Dustin Nemos.
And I'm like, yep, that fucking figures.
So, these guys are just such grifting scum and they've seen what Alex Jones does with all his dick pills and vitamin D that he marks up 50% over what you can get at Walgreens.
So, they know that there's a market for this stuff.
You preach fear and bullshit and then you sell people pills.
So, they're always going to work these angles.
I mean, this is an inevitability of this stuff.
Trap Lord Flecko asks, what are your thoughts on Assange?
I think he was doing Russia's bidding when he released the Podesta emails and all that kind of stuff.
I think he also was aggressively anti-Hillary because she hated him and he hated her.
So it was a mutual thing where Putin's like, hey, Kneecap Hillary.
Knock her down a peg or two.
And Assange was like, fuck yeah, I got this.
And I don't really think he's a journalist.
I think what he did was actually criminal.
And if he is extradited and stands trial in America, I'm good with it.
But it seems like also he's like suffering really badly right now, being in prison and all of that stuff's kind of dicey.
And QAnon making him out to be a hero is, well, he helped Trump win elections.
So of course they're going to think he's a hero.
I am surprised Trump— I mean, you know, for my money, I'm perfectly happy with people that helped Trump ascend to power being in prison.
If that makes me a bad liberal or a bad person, then I'm cool with that.
No, I— I'm the bad guy!
You need to start having some accountability.
Sorry, Mike, you couldn't follow up on my reference because Sarge started talking.
I know.
And also, thanks for the power of the webcam.
I saw you going for it, and I appreciate you, buddy.
Yes.
Aso Aces asks, what's the likelihood that Trump will attempt to sell U.S.
secrets in exchange for continued funding of his businesses?
100%.
He will absolutely give anyone anything for a nickel.
I mean, that is... I literally could not think of a more, like, toxic, state-secret-leaking asset to the Russians or whatever than former President Donald J. Trump.
For the good of the nation for many reasons, New York or Georgia or whatever state finally gets to him, needs to get to him and put him in a cell and then, you know, He can spend the rest of his life there, or he can totally legitimately kill himself like Epstein did.
I mean, everyone, everyone who's anyone agrees that Trump will absolutely do that.
Biden's cutting off his access to current intelligence briefings.
And I don't think that's ever been done before, as far as I'm aware of.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, I'm sure, like, there's, like, certain points where, like, a president lets former presidents have some intel to try to, like, give him advice and stuff like that.
But, I mean, I can't imagine trying to coach Trump from the sidelines.
I can't imagine Bill Clinton or W or Obama being like, Don, this is what you gotta do here.
Here's the play.
I just can't.
The idea that you would try it and the idea that he would listen to you is madness.
He'd just be like, I don't need to listen to your opinions.
I'm an incredibly fit genius.
It's like, all right, cool, bud.
Yeah.
He's one of the most petulant individuals in the world.
I mean, there were some phone calls that leaked from the Cuban Missile Crisis where Kennedy was talking to Eisenhower and asking Ike what his play was going to be.
I could actually see that being an important thing between two guys.
One was the president.
One guy is the president.
There's this big geopolitical shitstorm that one of them engaged in.
He would probably want like the old president who was like literally the general who beat Hitler to like talk to him and let him know what's going on.
Yeah, a smart move.
Yeah.
Oh, geez.
Yeah, the guy who would just go on Twitter tirades and just buys whatever Fox News was talking about that morning.
I don't see his advice being that valuable.
To me, the greatest thing in the world is imagining Trump calling up Biden, going, Joe, Joe, listen to me.
I got a play here.
And Biden being like, yeah.
Joe, get out there and tweet.
Tweet your heart out.
Send this tweet, Joe.
You'll get so much engagement.
You have no idea.
The golfing rates at Mar-a-Lago are really something, Joe.
You should really hit the links more often.
Yeah.
He's so great.
He's just literally an infomercial.
And no one says, any coincidence that we need 17 Republicans to convict?
Oh, QAnon loves the 17 Republicans to convict crap.
Any 17 in the wild just gets their rocks off like you read about.
Yeah, I've heard this about them, although they're constantly crusading against that sort of thing.
Yes, they are both vehemently against any sexuality while also frantically masturbating over the number 13, which is a fetish I've never understood.
I don't know.
I mean, McConnell seems like he wants to convict Trump just to lock him out so that the GOP has any chance of doing anything in two and four years.
If they could just lock him out of politics.
I think McConnell wants to convict him.
I mean, I'll believe McConnell wants to convict him when I see the number of yes votes to be somewhere around 60, and we might get towards a tipping point.
Like, right now, that first vote to, like, are we going to actually have this trial, that first vote being, like, 56-44, we're 11 shy, so I'm not thinking McConnell's actually twisting any arms right now.
Cause like the six people that voted yes that were Republicans, three of them just got reelected.
One's Romney, who's already made himself an anti-Trump and also Trump's like fucking poison in Utah.
So Romney doesn't have to worry about him.
And Toomey's retiring in Pennsylvania.
And I can never say her name, but McCaskill or however you say her name from Alaska.
The last time she got attacked from the right, she actually lost the primary to a Tea Party guy and she ran a write-in campaign and beat him and the Democrat and kept her seat.
So I'm not thinking she's too worried about being challenged by anybody.
The fact that you had six people that are really confident in where they stand in the Senate, they were willing to go forward with the trial.
It doesn't imbue me with a lot of confidence.
Let me see some guy that's up in 2022 being like, I'm voting to convict Crump, and I'm not scared of a QAnon lunatic primary in me.
When that happens, I'll be thinking that maybe this could actually be a thing.
We'll definitely do a special episode if Trump actually gets convicted though.
Live Twitch streaming of us all freaking out as I literally walked out of work to do it.
With our VTuber rigs.
Oh yeah, just the hottest of anime girls.
And finally, ZP asks, PokerPolitics, you used to be into conspiracy stuff, right?
9-11, was it?
Also JFK?
Could you help me understand why conspiracy theories believe that a government document which accurately diagnosed conspiracy theories around the JFK... Oh, yeah, this is the talk about...
After the assassination of JFK, there was this belief in the conspiracy theory community that the CIA coined the term conspiracy theorist to discredit people researching the Kennedy assassination.
But the term conspiracy theorist has been around at least since the 1800s.
There are very old newspapers that have the term conspiracy theorist in them.
This was just sort of made up by the people promoting Kennedy assassination conspiracy theories.
To make them sound more important, make them sound more threatening.
Yeah man, we made the CIA come up with a phrase to try to make us look like crazy cranks and lunatics and that's how we know we're getting to them because they had to do that.
It's actually no, it was a part of the lexicon for over a century before Kennedy got shot.
This is just, uh, it's an urban legend.
It's another myth that was created by, uh, conspiracy theorists.
In this case, it was done to try to bolster themselves and make themselves look bigger and better than they really are.
Well, there we go.
Thank you, folks, for your questions, as always.
If you have any other questions, you can go ahead and send them to MrMikeRains at PokerPolitics on Twitter.
If you need to communicate with myself or Sarge on Twitter, you can find us at HellWorldL and HellWorldSarge, respectively.
And, of course, the O in world being spelled with a Q.
If you'd like to support the show, the best thing you can do is just tell your friends about it.
You know, get some engagement out there.
Just holler at your boys if you think they might be into this sloppy fucking podcast ostensibly about QAnon.
If you happen to be in a position where you could throw some money our way, you can find us on Patreon at PokerPolitics as well.
Go ahead and toss us some of your shekels in order to get one of these cool new shoutouts like Mike Rains is about to do for some of our sweet, sweet Patreon supporters this month.
Yes, so at the $2 level are beautiful babies who don't have modifiers added to that name.
We have Anthony D and Orange October, which I guess is playing off Q's obsession with Red October and also Donald Trump.
We got a big five ball from QAnon debunker and titan of the field, Travis View.
Much appreciated that Travis would open up the QAnon.
Oh, wow.
I mean, yeah, thanks for opening up your purse for us little guys there, buddy.
That's actually very exciting.
Yes, so Daddy Travis opened up the wallet for us, and we much appreciate that.
And then finally, we have two $10 Beautiful Babies, which are the most incredibly beautiful babies on this earth, except for the $20 Beautiful Babies, which are even somehow more beautiful.
The $10 tier is like wallet-sized photo Beautiful Babies, and the $20 tier will be mantle-above-the-fireplace Beautiful Babies.
Yes!
And those two new beautiful babies are Heidi R. and Nark.
Nark, who has played Settlers of Gitan with me online a few times and has gotten progressively better at the game and will one day learn that ore is the one true power.
Yeah, I was about to say, getting better at that game is knowing to ignore all but two bricks.
If you like the sound of those sweet, sweet shout-outs, go ahead and toss us some shekels if you're able to.
Although we understand that some people might have the money to spend and not want to spend it on us three jokers talking into these heat cans about QAnon.
So, if you'd like to make a real, more appreciable difference in the world to the people that might need it, go ahead and donate your money to love146.org.
They're out there doing the good work that the QAnon folks claim they want done, but refuse to lift a finger to do themselves.
QAnon rather storm the Capitol than save kids.
Weird that.
Before you take us in the outro, Sarge has a request.
We, I, want to do a special episode on Q Around the World.
How the fuck is this death cult getting traction around the world and other countries when it's all about American politics?
But I need some help researching.
So if you want to message me on Twitter, if you know anything or can link me to some sources about How QAnon is taking hold in Germany and Japan.
I'd love some input.
And if you think that episode sounds interesting, just let us know.
Yeah, we're going to go ahead and dip it.
We're trying to dip our toes in a little more like actual investigative stuff by taking a magnifying glass to how this Q nonsense has managed to break free of the confines of America and poison the rest of the world.
So again, go ahead and message Sarge at HellWorldSarge on Twitter.
Go ahead and slide into those DMs if you'd like to discuss with him the horrible nature of Q in your home country, provided that it is not the United States, because that is where we experience our horrors ourselves.
Also, if you would like your penis to be smooth when you present it to the Lord Satan, Manscaped.
Not a sponsor, but, you know, if you want to smoosh after the Dark Lord Satan, Manscaped is where you do it.
They're not a sponsor.
In fact, none of the people I've made riffs about in this episode and show, in general, are sponsors.
We don't have sponsors yet, so please don't sue us, Manscaped, even though I do think that you could really make my knob glisten for Satan.
Anyway, so for another successful, let's put that in quotation marks, episode of the Adventures in Hellworld for this week, I am Hellworld Al signing out for Hellworld Sarge and Mike Rains, aka Poker and Politics.
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